The Nick DiPaolo Show - Trump Vs Tramp Finalized | Nick Di Paolo Show #1619

Episode Date: August 28, 2024

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about Debate finalized, Ruben wrong, a Naughty nose and much more! Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! SEE NICK LIVE: 9/27/24 - Wise Guys - Jordan Landing, UT 9/28/24 - Skankfest - Las Vegas, NV 9/29/24 - Skankfest - Las Vegas, NV TIX:  https://www.nickdip.com/tour    For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

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you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you Please contact connects Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge Bet MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm as mad as hell and I'm not gonna take this anymore! Gun show. Ah, crap. Dehydration. Every time. I am the... Do you guys like water?

I fucking hate it. I hate fucking water. I you guys like water? I fucking hate it. I hate fucking water. I hate it. And there's a lot of people like me. I didn't realize that Lou Holtz is one of them, my Aunt Carol, and my family never, a lot of them, my grandfather didn't fucking hate it. What, he drank wine on a 90 degree day.

One day I was choking my grandmother when she wouldn't dance with him after dinner. It's a true story, by the way. I just fucking hate it. And then I drink Gatorade, I get sick of that after a month. Powerade's a little better. Of course, I'm taking in that red and blue dye shit. I'm sure that's good for you. That's all fucking natural. I just fucking hate it. And I'm always dehydrated, which doesn't help with your pooping. What a way to start the show. That was pretty gross. Anyways, real quick, quick

headlines just to let you know that we keep the show up to date. Maybe if I turn this fucking thing on. Excuse my language up front, but if you have a problem with that, I don't want you on my team, okay? I've been talking like this since I was I was baptized. I said that fucking water is water. Wait a minute, you just figured it out. That's why I don't. I had a fag dumping a craft of fucking avion on my face. That's why I don't like it. That was fucking good. That's going in the act.

Cocaina. Sucks one last night. I still love them. They're not going to make the playoffs, I don love them. They're not gonna make the playoffs I don't think because they don't have the pitching this year but holy shit they have four rookies that you could talk about all-star next year. I'm not chitting you. Anyways I know you're sick of hearing that but one of my favorite teams I gotta be honest and by the way fucking I've watched the Sox this whole damn for 56 seasons and Jared Durant is having the best season overall season of any player I've seen

in my lifetime leads the league in doubles triples hit his 20th or 21st home last night 30 something stolen bases hitting it right under 300 not to mention he's thrown I don't know how many guys out from the Elffield. I think he's leading in that. Last night he takes one off the wall, bounces bare hands it, throws a dart, fucking they relay it to home. They're actually, they look like a good defensive,

a great defensive team and then they'll, they started kicking the ball around again last night. I'm just very excited about the next few years if Aaron judge gets cancer we might have a shot oh I didn't mean that I love that guy even though he's a Yankee I think he's a fucking gentleman and what a ballplay anyways real quick headlines these are just quick headlines that you can look up what am I fucking George H. Murrow was that his name? Sure. That's my crack producer. He goes, sure, sounds right.

David R. Morrow, David R. Morrow? Yeah, David. George, I really am fucking old. Couple headlines, you can look them up. Texas, Texas booted a million of voters off the rolls that weren't supposed to be on the rolls. So Abbott's doing his homework. They're not trying to steal the election. The state's trying to fucking let illegals vote.

I just, if this doesn't end in a civil war, I don't know. Also California, this will get you, get the hair in your nuts to stand up. California, very, about this close to passing a bill that will give illegal immigrants 150 grand towards a house So you California people if you're still living out there go ahead and enjoy your fucking anal rape I don't know. It's got to be a flat roof somewhere near Newsom's house What do you mean? No, I just heard the rain clicks. Right? You had that problem though. And one more thing, Kamala finally agreed to a hard-hitting interview with CNN. Why don't you just film a girl licking her ass, not to be vulgar.

By the way, dragging Tim Waltz with her to a friendly sit down and of course everything lefts going, well that's what people do after a convention. They usually do the first one together. Trump did it. Yeah, he did a number of them, not just one. And he didn't wait a fucking month. He had to, she's dragging this putz because she doesn't have the balls. He has to hold her fucking hand. Not to mention she wants notes at the debate. No, that's all been ruled out. We solved that.

Yeah, it's all been ruled out. No notes and they're going to be standing and whatever. But yeah, she asked for all that too. That really shows confidence. She's a phony folks. This whole thing is phony. I've never seen an election where the difference the difference between the two parts one hates them And that's not that's not hyperbole fucking hates this country

Really wants to turn at the third with shithole the halfway there and the other one loves the country in the concert and even mem I'm not too sure of I'm not huge Republican fan either. There's a rumor out there I didn't see it in the headlines, that there's 200 Republican staffers, those are people who get the, you know, Senators copy and shit, who signed something saying that they were gonna vote for Kamala. I couldn't find the headline, but somebody, it's out there, it doesn't matter, I'm just saying.

You guys know what I'm talking about. A bunch of Gen Z fucks. Yeah, probably Gen Z fucks, You know, gay guys, ugly women. That's what it's about, by the way. All this is not left, right, conservative, liberal. It's about people unhappy and hate themselves because of the way they were born. If you notice, there's a lot of freaks on the left, whether it's Antifa or whatever the fuck. Just miserable because they didn't fit into the mainstream in this country.

How was that from analysis? Kiss my grits. All. Alright let's get to it. Debate finalized. President Trump announced him and Harris have agreed to debate rules, of course after she fucking was trying to change them, after she tried to weasel out of them. I think that those those are my words by the way. So they're gonna put them up. I have reached an agreement with radical. I can't even do them. You gotta really yell when you're doing I watch Crowder. I go how the fuck you do I have reached an agreement with radical left Democrats for a debate with comrade Kamala Harris. It will be broadcast live on ABC fake news. This is where I fucking love them. We know that you don't even have to say that at this point, but he's about branding.

ABC fake news, which it is, if you saw the interview with Jonathan Karl on Sunday and Tom Cotton, it was unbelievable. By far the nastiest and most unfair newscaster in the business on Tuesday, September 10th, this debate's gonna take place in Philly. Jesus Christ, he's not even afraid of Pennsylvania. Trump announced that on his site, Truth Social. The rules will be the same as the last CNN debate, he says, which seemed to work out well for everyone except perhaps Crooked Joe.

You don't believe him? I'll refresh your memory. Here's Joe at his best in that debate. They were able to make every single solitary person eligible for what I've been able to do with the uh with with the COVID excuse me with um dealing with everything you have to do with uh look if we finally beat Medicare. Thank you, President Biden. We finally beat Medicare. I didn't know you were fighting it. The debate will be stand up and candidates cannot bring notes or cheat sheets, all the

shit that she wanted, Trump explained, we have also been given assurance by ABC that this will be a fair and equitable debate. And that neither side will be given the questions in advance. No Donna Brazeal, Trump throws. He remarked, noting that Harris failed to agree to a Fox News debate on September 4th. However, he said, that date will be held open

in case she changes her mind or flip-flops as she has done on every single one of her long-held and cherished policy beliefs. Boy, does he know how to stick it through. A possible third debate which would go to NBC fake news has not been agreed to by the radical left. Trump added, God bless America. Oh my God.

We don't deserve him, as many people say. How in God's greed. Honest to God, I just think as left as the meaty wants to be this country is, I swear to God there's eight people that agree with the Democrat. I fucking, and it doesn't matter because they're going to try to steal it anyways. Somebody is hell bent on turning this into a globalist shithole. I don't know. Anyways. turning this into a globalist shithole I don't know anyways anyways we have I

predicted how it's gonna look when Trump does debate Kamala I think this video says it all beating the living daylights out of a little school. Put em up, put em up! Ahh. Get ready for Las Vegas style action at Bet MGM, the king of online casinos. Enjoy casino games at your fingertips with the same Vegas strip excitement MGM is famous for when you play classics like MGM Grand Millions or popular games like Blackjack, Baccarat and Roulette. With our ever-growing library of digital slot games, a large selection of online table games and signature BetMGM service, there is no better way to bring the

excitement and ambiance of Las Vegas home to you than with BetMGM Casino. Download the BetMGM Casino app today. BetMGM and GameSense remind you to play responsibly. BetMGM.com for Ts and Cs. 19 plus to wager. Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you,

please contact CONNECTS Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Ruben Just Wrong is the next headline. Arizona Police Association, that's the APA, was also a entertainment agency I was with in LA, turned heads recently by endorsing a liberal Democrats rep Ruben Gallego, and he's a lefty folks, in Arizona's US Senate race,

despite Gallego's controversial history on law enforcement issues and the APA's simultaneous support of former president Donald Trump, the move to back the Democrat over Republican Perry Lake comes despite the organization endorsing Lake's bid for governor during the last election cycle, and just days after it announced its endorsement of Trump in the presidential fucking race.

Are you saying he knows nothing about these matters? To my knowledge, nothing. I wonder what kind of money he's gonna get. As a Marine, he says, this is Gallego, combat veteran, we know Congressman Gallego understands the complexities, or maybe it's not him and somebody talked aboutego understands the complexities of modern policing in American society today. Yeah, I can tell by the way it's going on in Arizona. While at the same time recognizing the public's expectations. APA President Justin, I like

little boy's hair. That's a tease and a joke. Put him up. You got, you got, you got, there he comes. There you go. Look at this gopher. Look at this fucking gopher in a suit. Said Justin Harris said in a statement posted to X, doesn't he look like a fucking law and order guy? Looks like he should be chewing an acorn. The move also comes as Gallego's record on police issues has come under increased scrutiny including an Arizona Sun Times report. In one instance Gallego argued, he looks like JD Vance if JD Vance is on a high carb diet, in one instance Gallego argued for restrictions on police use of certain

weapons because they don't know how to use them in a safe manner. Well teach them. In another instance he post, how tough is it to use a flamethrower? And another instance he posted on social media about his effort to restrict police departments from being able to access military gear. I'm not so against that because I don't like, they are getting pretty militarized, the police, local police. So I'm not going to push back that hard.

The report also detail, although when you get 10 million people at an open board, I guess you should fucking militarize the Boy Scouts. The report also detailed Gallego's history of social media posts in support of Black Lives Matter. That's all I need to hear. It's all I need. Fenway Park still has a sign that says Black Lives Matter. That's all I need to hear. It's all I need. Fenway Park still has a sign that says Black Lives Matter. We have already debunked that organization. Even before they

debunked them, in their mission statement, it says part of their mission was to replace the overthrow of the United States government, replace it with something else. And yet there's still people like this jerk off in power supporting black lives matter in the aftermath of George Floyd's death in 2020 including one post in which he argued that Protesters aren't the bad guy and that the bad guys were the one behind the police line He did guy aego. Who the fuck said that? Gallego, Rubin. Who's the slimy little cop in a shit twinkle toe cocksucker down here who just signed his own death warrant? Say it again, Rubin Gallego.

That's all I need to know about him. Excuse me. Signing major reforms into law and transforming the culture of law enforcement remains a matter of life and death. No, transform the culture of the scumbags. You know who I'm talking about in this country. The law and orderless remains a matter of life and death, especially the black communities. Oh God, this is what happens when you're out west. Said the APA's decision was blasted by Lake's campaign. Lake said Ruben Gallego

supported defending the police okay what else do you need to mention the law in order to see in vilified law enforcement uh... while serving in congress he supports open borders and is weak on crime kary lake will always back the blue and support law enforcement in safe communities

and she looks pretty cool for a woman in her late 90s so does the broad to the left of her to the right of us the one on the left I don't know she looks like a tight end for the Eagles what can I say folks I'm a sexist pig and I think you should enjoy that we need more of that what a beautiful backdrop I have, huh? We really did it. I said that we. I showed up a couple times. I put the screws in the bookcase, a couple of them. And we have a place for Santa Claus next to the lamp for Christmas. Oh, the gay Santa? I got to get that working again. Because it, it, it, me and mean Andy my wife came up with it. We saw Trump dancing it dances just like Trump. It goes like this Well, it would help if you would stop knocking it off the desk. Oh, that's true. I think I might have broke its spine

You want to see when I see Santa instead of a sleigh. He's got a wheelchair Naughty knows We're changing the pace a little bit because this is, we crunch some numbers, shows 95% male watched and you 5% women, God love you. Naughty Nose, this is a perfect to me Nick DePaulo show. You get Trump Nose, you get election nose and now you're gonna get this Jeremy Jackson was just as bad as his Baywatch character Spilling the gross and intimate thing he used to do what his female co-stars weren't around I don't see what's gross about it at all. I still do it sure

It's men's underwear and I'm at the gym. That's not the point and the after Baywatch Moment in the Sun documentary. documentary oh it's in a documentary he says that that ears August 28 in that today Jackson 43 who played Hobie Buchanan stupid name on the popular 90s beach areas revealed he sneaked into the actress's trailers when they went home for the day and smelled their worn bathing suits. Delicious.

Delicious. Thank you. Thank you. If you didn't and you were 14, you guys, you understand when a boy's 14, you'll fuck a catcher's mitt. You don't even have to oil it. I'm telling you, I get caught at a sporting goods store. You'll fuck a couch, you'll fuck an ashtray, and this guy's on a set with this. And he's a good look and they were probably sending him. He

says, and this is him I quote, and I love that he's saying this shit now. He's a real guy. I would usually sneak into the woman's trailers after they were done and grab their dirty bathing suits. Let's just say I smelled every blank on the Baywatch. Fill in the blank. And I know what he meant. He meant, you know, candles they have. Jackson shared, adding, he found one Baywatch babe's scent irresistible. It's a sick book. And Nicole Egert, she's suffering from cancer by the way right now. Is that Pam on the right? Yeah, Pam on the right, Egert on the left. Jesus H Christ. I'd shampoo my head with it, diarrhea. Cut. What'd I say?

Nicole Eggert was the big one for sure, he said in the clip. We had a very intimate moment, her and I, that she never knew about. And then he said this. Hound dog is going to eat that pussy. All this show. After the shocking revelation, producers spilled the beans to Egert 52, battling breast cancer after being diagnosed in 2023. The actress played Summer Quinn on the show and wasn't shocked to learn about Jackson's

confession. This makes her cool too, by the way. She says, and I quote, I knew Jeremy very well. This surprises me, not at all. She responded in the documentary, Edgar laughed off Jackson's habit. I'm not even mad at a 14 year old Jeremy. I mean, puberty on a show like, exactly, on a show like that she joked. She goes, I love growing up Jeremy for being honest about

14 year old Jeremy. That's a cool chick right there. If that was a feminist, first of all you wouldn't sniff it. Well if it was any 20s actor. That's right. Now, yeah you'd be in prison. Jackson who played the son of David Hasselhoff's character, I guess I didn't really follow the plot.

I didn't know he had a son. I think I said, no, I said, remember she was on a show, VIP, too, after this, and I said something about on the Pam Anderson Rose, I said, she was on that show that's responsible for permanently making my dick crooked to the left. Jackson, who played the son of David Haselhoff's character, struggled with crystal meth addiction while filming this. That means he was going through 40 suits a minute. He actually tried to eat a few. Anyways, I found the clip that this has come up, not in Baywatch shows.

It's actually come up in actual, maybe the greatest show ever, but you remember this. Look at that girl's panties. Did he tell you that? Fucking baby. Hahahaha His face. Let me do a Polly Walnuts Tony's the late great Tony Cerrico Every time somebody said something accusing him of something he'd go You fucking baby.

Let me tell you something. What a show, folks. What a show. You get fucking election news, bathing, sniffing, got more shit coming up that should make you laugh unless you're retarded. Hey, boys and girls, in the second half of the show, anyways, you guys that are on Mug Club, stick around for the rest of the show because you signed up. The rest of you is go to nickdip.com, nickdip.com, and sign up for Mug Club and you'll get my entire show for now on and you'll get Stephen Crowder's show which is worth the money itself and he's got a lot of stuff too. Not to mention an undercover team like Project Veritas who's got a couple of stuff too. Not to mention an undercover team like Project Veritas, who's got a couple things coming

up before the election that are going to fucking shock you. So anyways, go to nickdip.com and check out my dates. September 27th, wise guys, Jordan landing in Utah. And then the next, I said, Utah, fucking retired. The next two nights, September 28, 29, I'll be with my buddies in Las Vegas at Skankfest, which has been around for a while. It's a big hit. I haven't done it yet.

And I'm looking forward to that. Hope to see you out there. Second half of the show also, Harris' deputy manager, his name's Flaherty, gets busted violating, well, it's not official official yet but he was helping violate Americans First Amendment rights by working with Big Tech also a plane was delayed in India because something that you won't believe was on the tarmac you won't see that here I mean you'll see the clip here you don't see that in the United States I'm saying you just see like Dominicans and whites fighting on the...

in the terminal. Boring shit like that. Hi. Good night everybody. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, I'm out. you