The Nick DiPaolo Show - Uvalde Cops Thin Yellow Line | Nick Di Paolo Show #1240

Episode Date: July 14, 2022

Biden's Holocaust gaffe. Abortions for illegals. Barrack busting balls. Cowardice Uvalde cops. NYC monkeying with Monkey Pox rollout....

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 🎵 Here's Nick! Hi! Welcome to Trans Thursday! Let me hear that phrase one more time. Jesus H., huh? I'm the only one that has a penis and is not confused about it. Feels that way, don't it? How you doing, kids?
Starting point is 00:01:03 How you is? What it was? This show is entirely funded, you know, by you viewers. I want to thank you for that. Encourage you to go to nickdip.com. Come and click on the red text at the top of the page to make a contribution. You'll get your name read here on the show right out loud. But more importantly, you'll be supporting free speech in a forum for people like you and me to tell it like it is. That's nickdip.com. And thank
Starting point is 00:01:26 you as always. Made that up. I made that up. So I want all of you to enjoy your cake. So enjoy. By the way, quick announcement on my red. So it's only fair that I talk about it when they suck too, because boy, do they suck. Holy shit. I don't want to hear about injuries at anything else man p you lost their third in a row to tampa they haven't beat they haven't won a series in their division they share they split with the yankees that's as close as they've come. And I mean, they're getting picked off bases. They're throwing the ball around. P.U. Really, man? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:02:10 I don't know what's going on. Christ. This could be. They could get kicked right out of the... Again, I mean, it's a brutal division. And they might sneak in as a wild card. But if they're... Bobby Dahlbeck, I'm, it's a brutal division, and they might sneak in as a wild card, but if they're, if they're, Bobby Dalbeck, I'm pulling for this kid, they keep trying, he had 25 homers last,
Starting point is 00:02:30 he got hot for a couple months, and the, but this guy couldn't, like I said, he couldn't hit a bull's ass with a base fiddle, I am tired of watching him, they're making errors, they're, anyways, how you guys doing, all right, let's move on to something really funny, Holocaust jokes, All right, let's move on to something really funny. Holocaust jokes. Guys, you know I'm kidding. You know I'm kidding. I say that like I'm on real TV.
Starting point is 00:02:51 Who gives a fuck? Biden's Holocaust gaffe, priceless. That's the first story. I can't help it, folks. I know we do a lot of Biden here. What can I tell you? President Biden, they still call him president, visiting Israel on Wednesday, added yet another entry to his long list of gaffes,
Starting point is 00:03:12 mistakenly saying this, roll him. Keep alive the truth and honor of the Holocaust. Horror of the Holocaust. Let's hear that again. Keep alive the truth and honor of the holocaust the honor of the holocaust hates jews hates jews oh my god and then listen to his stutter here keep alive the truth and honor of the holocaust horror of the little fuck. You know that? Yeah, the honor of the Holocaust. Joe, unbelievable.
Starting point is 00:03:57 He watches Schindler's List in reverse so it has a happy ending. They used to say that about Mississippi burning. That was the old joke. Anyways, I use it anyways. Fuck off. I don't have time for originality. The president made the flub shortly after touching down
Starting point is 00:04:10 in Israel. Of course, he thought he was in Newark, New Jersey. And they told him, look at that over there, that wall. That's Fenway. He goes,
Starting point is 00:04:20 why are those people all praying and kissing that wall? It's the green monster. Kicking. They should put, it's a great idea. What's it called, the wailing wall? Put fucking monster seats up there. Jews, I kid. 12 bucks a beer up there.
Starting point is 00:04:39 After touchdown, Israel kicking off a two-day visit with Middle Eastern country leaders. Oh, yeah, a lot of respect. He's been hounding, you know what, Saudi Arabia to cut loose with some more oil. They don't even take his calls. Big, yeah, big middle finger. Later on Wednesday, the president visited Yad Vashem, Yad Vashem Memorial to honor Holocaustims in Jerusalem, wearing a skullcap. Look, and he's asleep.
Starting point is 00:05:10 He's out on a, I literally thought, I'm not kidding you, I thought that was that wax museum in London. What a piece of cheese this guy is. Wearing a skullcap, Biden was invited to rekindle the eternal flame. His has gone out about 12 years ago. to rekindle the eternal flame. His has gone out about 12 years ago. In the Memorial's Hall of Remembrance.
Starting point is 00:05:30 That's where he was. He don't like it in there. Hates Jews. Hates Jews. No, I don't know about that. Two Marines placed a wreath on the stone crypt containing the ashes of Holocaust victims, and Biden listened as a cantor, which I do when I moonlight, recited the remembrance
Starting point is 00:05:47 prayer. Play the audio of the remembrance. I think it's a remembrance prayer. Play the audio of the remembrance prayer. Play the audio of the remembrance prayer. Play the audio of the remembrance prayer. All right. That was the wrong audio. That was my agent telling me I owed him 10% from the laughs out loud in Texas, the improv, and the funny bone in Oklahoma, and that he was going to maybe cut me off the list of clients.
Starting point is 00:06:20 That was what that was. I so sighed. He then was entertained. Joe Biden was entertained by a Hasidic dancer who's doing a religious dance, celebrating a 50% off sale at Moishe's Hardware in Tel Aviv, and it went something like this. Hey, yo, what it is?
Starting point is 00:06:40 Everybody report to the motherfucking dance floor with they motherfucking drinks they wet ass pussy they be fat as in the big brown titties with the pepperoni nipples as I'm coming for you I got this all along every day sucking on my balls licking on my balls bitches
Starting point is 00:07:03 they know stick it in that booty of my balls Bitches, they know Stick it in that booty hole My balls, my balls Suck all my balls All up in that asshole Let me hit that booty, wow Licking the dick, sucking the balls Swab a doll, beating down your pussy, wow To the ground, spinning round and round
Starting point is 00:07:20 And these... I'm sorry, the internet's been around for, I don't know, 30 years. That has been my favorite thing. Probably get flagged or some shit. Anyways, what do they got? What are the fucking intestines on the table? The visit marked Biden's first visit to the Middle East since taking office. Boy, really?
Starting point is 00:07:42 The president is expected to offer anxious Israeli leaders strong reassurance of his determination to stop Iran's growing nuclear program. Is that right? And you did that by how? By rekindling the nuclear thing that Obama started when we sent them 80 million on a fucking, remember, on a pallet in cash?
Starting point is 00:08:02 Remember? We got rid of that. Trump squashed it. And he rekindled all that. Is that how you're going to reassure Israel? You know. To stop Iran's growing nuclear program, saying he'd be willing to use force as a last resort. He won't use force to protect our borders.
Starting point is 00:08:22 We're being invaded. Literally invaded. But, you know, that's not important. And again, he worries about Ukraine's borders. And U.S. ally Israel considers Iran to be its greatest enemy, citing its nuclear program. It calls for Israel's destruction and its support for hostile militant groups across the region. They really are very anti-Semitic. Those Palestinians don't like to say nasty. It seems foolish to have all this money lying around. Oh, you'd rather have it down at the bank where the Jewish guys can leer at it? That was right from a Palestinian.
Starting point is 00:08:56 What is his name? He had one eye and a fucking hook. That's all I know. Anyways, let's move on. The headline here, I gave you guys a little bit of taste of. I'm a man of the world with many languages. Aborto e pedido. What does that mean, folks?
Starting point is 00:09:16 That's right, a petite abortion. No. President Joe Biden's, I forgot, what does it mean? Oh, abortion on demand. That's what that means. Aborto a pedido. President Joe Biden's border officials have decided
Starting point is 00:09:33 they will transport, get this, detained migrants who want abortions to U.S. states that allow abortions, according to the Wall Street Journal. Because that's a priority right now, isn't it? So now we're, well, I have a joke in my act, but it's true. We fund abortions in a Mexico, at least we used to, through the UN. We would have funded abortions in Mexico.
Starting point is 00:09:59 And I'd tell my conservative friends that, they'd get upset, and I'd go, well, it's cheaper than building a wall. Two billion for a wall, 80 bucks for a dirt vac. Come on. You know what I'm saying? That's too real. Why are these detained women pregnant in the first place, asked Rosemary Clooney. No, Jenks. Now, it's funny. This is how I am, a little prejudgment.
Starting point is 00:10:32 I could have sworn that was an angry feminist. I mean, it looks like Chris Farley playing the Gap Girl, you know. I'm hungry. Back off, I'm hungry. Anyways, that's a good question. Why are they pregnant in the first place, asked Rosemary Jenks, the policy director for Numbers USA. If they want abortions,
Starting point is 00:10:50 they could have been impregnated on their way here, probably by members of the cartel. That is probably a significant portion of these cases, and she's exactly right. Don't you think so? This is rape.
Starting point is 00:11:03 This is rape. And do we pay for that? With our tax money? I don't know. Who's paying for that? I don't you think so? This is rape! This is rape! And do we pay for that? With our tax? I don't know. Who's paying for that? I don't know how it works. Also, how many Hispanic females actually are going to get an abortion? That's a good point.
Starting point is 00:11:16 Well, the Mexican ones aren't, but, you know, those El Salvador sluts? No, I don't know. It's actually a good guess. Well, when it's rape, I don't know. I don't know how religious they are. But a it's a good guy well when it's rape I don't know I don't know how religious they are but Jesus I'm not having a problem with it do you want those are like anchor kids enough already again not to be nothing out to take it over god bless rest in peace uh the Wall Street Journal reported on July 12th on the policy adopted by the Department of Homeland Security and the Immigration. Would you say ICE, you motherless tit wonders? The memo is
Starting point is 00:11:53 from U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, ICE, acting director, Tay Johnson, and is addressed to Corey Price. Where's Taye Johnson? Boy, what a racist country. Every power position is taken by a person of color, but we're racist, you know. Addressed to Corey Price, head of the agency's enforcement division. This memorandum, and I'm quoting, serves as a reminder of existing ICE policies and standards requiring that pregnant individuals detained in ICE immigration custody have access to full, and here's where they do the little word salad, it's full reproductive health care, not abortions. You see how they have to, you guys ever ask yourself that, you jerk-offs on the left,
Starting point is 00:12:35 why you have to come up with new words for words that have been around? Do you know why? Because it hides the evilness that you're really doing. Reproductive health care. Because it hides the evilness that you're really doing. Reproductive healthcare. This is also a reminder, he says, that pursuant to existing ICE policy, it may be necessary to transfer a detained pregnant individual, again, individual, not woman, with an area of responsibility or to another area of responsibility, that's AOR, when appropriate and practicable, in order to ensure such access.
Starting point is 00:13:10 You see where the priorities are, man? Oh, man. The new memo talks about future abortions for each pregnant individual, but does not mention women or girls. You think the left has done a number on... This is all intentional. It's not even about politics.
Starting point is 00:13:30 It's just so ridiculous! However, a July 5th report by Reuters said Biden's deputies are already delivering raped migrant children to abortion clinics. This is like hitting a triple for them, you know? For the past nine months. Don't they realize they're killing their future voters? That's why they're letting them in in the first place.
Starting point is 00:13:54 This is a good segment. Make it some good points. U.S. health officials have been flying or driving unaccompanied alien minors from Texas shelters to other states for abortions. Meanwhile, huh? Meanwhile, Texas is a mess. People pouring over. Remember the goddamn, not the governor, but another guy on the border, a county guy,
Starting point is 00:14:16 literally declared an invasion. Did we ever get an answer from Abbott on that? Probably not. Too busy driving Maria to Planned Parenthood, though. And friggin' and you know the baby's already anti-American, you know? They don't even like this guy. Even in the womb we caught one. Fucking watch this. Giving a fucking doctor the finger. Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!
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Starting point is 00:17:14 Nicotine is an addictive chemical. So is vanilla ice cream and cheeses. Am I right? You're right. You are correct. right? You're right. You are correct. As we move on, speaking of black, half black, Barack the ball buster, he surfaced again. It was just a little thing, and I was debating whether I should put this in the show or not, but then I'm like, after I heard his condescending tone, I thought it really typified elitist assholes like himself.
Starting point is 00:17:51 By the way, he's, don't let the big smile fool you and stuff. And yeah, I know he's smoke pot and he's cool, whatever. His hatred for capitalism and this country is just, and again, again, you want me to believe he was elected none of them are I don't believe George W and none of them are okay Nick that's I don't give a shit that's after what happened last time I don't believe that rep Ronnie Jackson right here a great but the missing Jackson brother the former White House physician has said he received a scathing, I'll repeat, a scathing email from former President Barack Hussein Obama.
Starting point is 00:18:33 When Jackson suggested that then 2020 presidential candidate Joe Biden undergo a test of his cognitive abilities. Why? What's so outrageous? What are we doing? What's going on right now? Nothing, Joe. You're standing on the front lawn of the White House naked eating a grilled cheese, you dinkweed. The missive from the 44th president came after Jackson, Republican Texas, of course,
Starting point is 00:19:00 retweeted a video of one of the mental gaffes Biden made on the campaign trail. Jackson writes in his memoir, he's got a new book out, that's why this is resurfacing, Holding the Line, a copy of which was obtained by Fox News. Remember the cognitive test? This is him quoting from his book. That test I gave at real Donald Trump, The one he aced. Of course you do. Pursued, broad, tits, camera, sunglasses. It was something like that. I aced it. Pumpkin, tampon, traffic cone, nipple. And I got them all right. I got it right. They're jealous. The one he aced sounds like somebody else might need some testing done.
Starting point is 00:19:50 Scary, tweeted Jackson, who served in the White House medical unit under both Obama and George W. Bush and became physician to the president in 2013. Within 20 minutes of tweeting that, Jackson writes, Obama emails him. And it hits his inbox. In it, the former president wrote that he always spoke highly of Jackson in public and private and considered him a fine doctor and service member, but also a friend. And you know what? You should have left it there. Shut up. Mind your fucking business and shut up.
Starting point is 00:20:23 That's why I have to express my disappointment at the cheap shot you took at Joe Biden via Twitter. Here's a guy, what's so fucking rich about this? We find out now, and again, this tweet was from a while ago, but we found out since that Biden bad-mouthed Joe every chance he got behind his back. We know that. He didn't really like him. Anyways, Obama, it's all politics with him. That's why. It was unprofessional and beneath the office that you once held. It was also disrespectful to me.
Starting point is 00:20:56 Oh, now we're getting to it. And the many friends you had in our administration. You were the personal physician to the President of the United States, as well as an admiral in the United States Navy. You sure he wasn't a corpsman? Remember that? I don't forget anything, Barack. I expect better, and I hope upon reflection that you will expect more of yourself in the future.
Starting point is 00:21:18 Yes, sir, Dad. Who gives a fuck what you think? Sounds like he's lecturing a kid. Unbelievable, you pompous ass you. Jackson was criticized and widely mocked in 2018 for declaring former President Trump in excellent mental shape with absolutely no cognitive or mental issues whatsoever.
Starting point is 00:21:41 Remember? They got all over him. You guys have, can I, I'll repeat it again. You've been wrong about everything. Everything. I think Norm MacDonald asked the question. I don't know if he was referring to politics. He said, though, what if you woke up
Starting point is 00:21:55 and you realized everything you believed your whole life was wrong? I think it might have been. Anyways, no cognitive mental issues whatsoever. After the media questioned the 45th president's mental fitness. Remember? Oh, he's too dumb. He's too.
Starting point is 00:22:11 And they don't apologize. They don't take it back. How do you feel now, people who will? They just put it. They ignore it like it never happened. Jackson writes in his memoir that he believed he was, as former White House physician, immensely qualified to weigh in on Biden's mental abilities. Of course he was.
Starting point is 00:22:32 Yes, sir. Biden was on TV again making crazy statements and concerning mental gaffes. He didn't know what state he was in or what office he was campaigning for, which is true. state he was in or what office he was campaigning for, which is true. Jackson said he contemplated responding to Obama's email, but eventually decided against it. He said, upon reflection, I thought, you know what? Fuck this jerk off. No, I put that in for emphasis. You know what? Screw that guy. You know, he said, that damn it i'm not doing it jackson says in the book i just walked away from it which was the last time i had any contact uh with mr obama bye dickhead it's awfully ironic now considering bide's mental fitness this is him
Starting point is 00:23:19 talking jackson still is all anyone including the the liberal media, can talk about. Jackson told Fox, it really is true. Yes, sir. Everybody, that's all we talk about, right? Even the New York Times, remember, this week put an article out going, of course, they defended his cognitive abilities when he was running for president. But once they got in, you know, and they see what a mess and how the Democrat Party is coming. When I say red wave is not even, I'm so sure of this. I still hear people on TV go, well, the Republicans will win,
Starting point is 00:23:55 but I don't think by them. No. You guys would be lucky if there's a Democrat Party left after this. Honestly. You've failed on a massive, massive scale. But then again, you might fix the elections
Starting point is 00:24:10 and I could all be wrong. Sons of bitches. Let me tell you something. Black coffee. Makes my teeth nice and white. Last night I ate, I've been trying to stay away from processed anything, you know. I ate, you know, you're supposed to eat a handful of peanuts. I ate half a plant as, I can't help myself.
Starting point is 00:24:39 Three peaches, two plums. Three peaches, two plums. Oh, London broil for dinner, marinated in a nice teriyaki sauce. Oh, my aching stem was that delicious. And broccoli rabe. I'm just saying, I took a dump today that was smooth as black buffalo. That's a compliment, by the way.
Starting point is 00:25:06 Why did I throw that in? I don't know. You never hear Walter Cronkite doing that. This is just in. President Kennedy died as of 3 p.m. this afternoon. Man, do I get a shit! No rational person. What is this called?
Starting point is 00:25:23 Oh, Uvalde police are yellow. Maureen Callahan of the Post, who I like, she's a good writer. She put this out and it was hard to disagree with any of it. No rational person can look at what happened more accurately, what didn't happen in Uvalde, and use the term police response with a straight face. Can we even call this a failure? It feels more like a dereliction
Starting point is 00:25:46 of duty, which was the best line I thought. The greatest collective act of cowardice in modern American history, she says. And I don't think that's, I don't think that's hyperbole. And the powers that be in Texas continue to lie. She's talking about the new footage that came out this week. The powers in Texas continue to lie, deflect and defend the police who stood aside, literally, for over an hour as an act of shoe to terrorize Rob Elementary and Uvalde. Chicken shit. That's Uvalde Mayor Don McLaughlin. Chicken shit.
Starting point is 00:26:23 That's Uvalde Mayor Don McLaughlin. That's not assailing the spineless offices, but rather the local news outlets for releasing this latest footage. You believe that crap? He's calling them chicken. You fucking hypocrite. Here's the footage she's talking about. And I think, again,
Starting point is 00:26:41 I think her assessment is spot on. And I want to remind you, in this video, because it's out there, they removed the screaming of the children. That's how upsetting this was. What he was saying, what's his name, McLaughlin, what's his name? He was upset because he said the parents shouldn't have been exposed to this, which I would agree with normally, but they have been denying and lying to the press,
Starting point is 00:27:14 not releasing anything, 140-something requests. So it would have never seen the light of day. So, yes, I sort of agree that would have been horrible if're one of the parents but seeing the politicians don't have your back take a look at this it really is one guy one soldier excuse me one officer goes over and uses hand sanitizer like he's at lunch it's fucking watch this for look they're doing nothing. One parent's trying to get in. They're holding them back. And again, I try to,
Starting point is 00:27:58 you put yourself in their shoes or whatnot, and yes, your life is on the fucking line. But that's what you do for a living. That's what you signed up for. It's what you trained for. So it is right, I guess, to second guess. When I say second guess, I don't mean that as a positive.
Starting point is 00:28:17 Hey, hey, hey. Can you imagine your kids are there? Remember they were holding back a guy? There's a guy, one of the cops looking at his phone, which I didn't get all nuts about
Starting point is 00:28:30 because you don't know, it could be related to that. It was, his wife was one of the teachers that got killed. But there were mothers that would have run in and given their life
Starting point is 00:28:41 before these guys. It really, it speaks to this country right now. We saw another shooting. Remember the Parkland shooting? Remember that guy in a golf cart or whatever doing nothing? I don't know. I hope the Chinese aren't watching, Russians.
Starting point is 00:28:58 Whoever, Ukrainians would be laughing their balls out. Ukrainians, you got mothers out there, housewives with guns shooting at Russians. Whoever leaked absolutely did the right thing, Maureen Callahan says. Uvalde officials cannot be trusted to do the right thing, as this video proves. You are correct, sir.
Starting point is 00:29:18 To watch his first few minutes to see a little boy spy the gunman from around a corner and run the other way, to see the gunman turn left, disappear from view, and then to hear the pure firepower of an assault rifle as it's aimed at fourth graders is to get, this is a good line, viscerally, unforgettably close to this particular American horror. With one caveat, the screams and cries of the children have been edited out. Screams and cries of the children have been edited out.
Starting point is 00:29:45 Why that is, is obvious. But the cynicism on display by Uvalde officials, the pure cover your ass machinations in effect, is to wonder if we're that far gone. If the only way to do right by these little victims is to hear them scream. Because cops on the scene that day did not. And I'm a cop lover, folks. You know that.
Starting point is 00:30:14 The show's always pro-cop. But, I mean, pictures don't lie here. They get shields. They get guns. It reminds me of the Rambo scene I always go to movies remember the National Guard was chasing Rambo and they they and one guy's yelling the head of the National Guard's yelling at the get in there Thompson he's like I gotta be back at that drugstore on Monday it's it that had that feeling to it you you know. Police were there in three minutes for all the good they did,
Starting point is 00:30:52 watched them run for cover as gunfire erupts. We did the kind of American heroism epitomized by the firefighters and their first responders who entered the World Trade Center and climbed those stairs knowing they might never survive. Feels so distant now, she says. We may as well be talking about the greatest generation. So well put. While the gunman secluded himself in a classroom with dead bodies, police fretted for a master key. The classroom was unlocked. Uvalde's mayor, attorney general, and the city of Uvalde itself a complicit. As of June 18th, listen to this,
Starting point is 00:31:25 148 public records requests regarding the shooting and response have been denied. And you wonder why people go, false flag, and start coming up with these theories. The city retained a private law firm for that purpose, arguing that such records could be highly embarrassing. Well, whose fault is that? Yeah. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:31:56 They're almost admitting. Those people, their lives are wrecked forever. And do you see my point, though? They put up a wall, you can't get any answers, and you wonder why people start putting tinfoil hats on, they say. And if you guys don't understand a false flag, okay, a government will do it. Actual people will die.
Starting point is 00:32:18 They don't give a fuck. I really believe our government's, you know, capable of that shit. You guys have seen what they're capable of. I mean, Tuskegee, Airmen, whatever. Why would they be any different? Anyways, it's a nice light show for a Thursday. Cameos, folks. I love doing these cameos.
Starting point is 00:32:40 And I'm getting, finally we're advertising again. I know it wasn't me. Starting to get a lot of orders. If you've got someone who is celebrating an upcoming birthday or event, or just someone you want to send a great gift to, send them a cameo from moi. I'd love to send a personal message to roast your loved one or co-worker. You've got to give me enough information, though. I've done a couple lately.
Starting point is 00:33:02 Yeah, he likes brown shoes and he eats a lot of sugar. Okay. Dallas is going to put the link on the screen. Go there, and you can see some of the cameos I've done, and order one for yourself, or just go to Cameo and search for my name, and they'll tell you how it's done, and it's a great gift, actually. This is a final joke. I mean, a joke. Two more? Well, we're only going to get one in, I think, because the show can't be too long. New York City monkeying around again with vaccine rollout. The early days of the Big Apple's coronavirus vaccine rollout were plagued by incompatible computer systems provided by vendors that frequently crashed under high demand. So City Hall ordered up a home-built system that could handle the traffic, right? Sounds good so far,
Starting point is 00:33:53 but that system, it's called VAX4NYC, has inexplicably remained on the shelf, while the Department of Health has once again opted to use vendors whose technology can't keep up with demand for monkeypox shot appointments. Frustrating activists and fruitcakes and pillow biters and former city officials. What the hell's going on out here? The truth of it is, monkeypox affects literally about 100 people on the planet
Starting point is 00:34:29 and it shouldn't even be a headline or really should. Again, they just want to remind you guys. They're checking on you. Let's see if they're still obeying us. Saw a lady go by, a black woman today, by herself, younger than me, fucking mask on in her car.
Starting point is 00:34:48 Now, I'm trying to give people the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she has cancer, immune deficiency, but come on. Where was I last? Up in Boston. Logan Airport. You would have thought it was March of 2020. I must have saw 40 people. March of 2020.
Starting point is 00:35:03 I must have saw 40 people. It's just so, just lets the air out of my left lung. The chorus of frustration reached a crescendo after computer problems plagued a DOHMH's attempt to release slots for all three rounds of Monkey Park's appointments offered so far. And it's predominantly a gay men's disease. But again, you know,
Starting point is 00:35:27 actually I heard Dr. Drew Pinsky say that on TV. I was probably get canceled last night or whatever. Pressure is mounting on local and federal authorities to overhaul their response to the monkeypox outbreak as cases
Starting point is 00:35:43 continue to surge oh yeah amid uh national inoculation shortages repeated computer system meltdowns and widespread complaints about accessing testing and antiviral medications to manage in fact all the stuff that they already experienced with the systems too it's just too big do you understand and and like this though this is not this is not a pandemic it's not even i don't even know how to describe it's not even the flu i mean it's a serious uh virus whatever but it's mostly uh homosexual men mostly almost all i'm actually trying to be nice here. And New York just, remember how bad they botched? Remember Cuomo doing those press conferences? Remember he got nominated for a goddamn Emmy,
Starting point is 00:36:35 right? He won it. That's right. He won an Emmy. Meanwhile, they were stacking up old people behind the dumpster like sandbags on a swollen riverbank. Unfreaking real. They can't even get this right. A couple hundred people want to get shots. And like Dallas said before, he said, why do I have a feeling New York, you could, I don't know, say yellow fever is making a comeback. Fish bite and provide disease. Everyone get vaccinated. Yeah, fish bite.
Starting point is 00:37:09 What do you got? I got big mouth bass syndrome. I got the variant, you know, the flounder type whatnot. Medications to manage infections. Anyways, I interviewed a few of the guys there and their frustration. It's impossible. There's one number to call. People are fighting over appointments. The city's scheduling website actually crashed
Starting point is 00:37:30 from high traffic after more than a thousand new appointments were posted Tuesday. Demand for the vaccine clearly higher than current supply. They didn't prepare me for the line. But demand is currently higher than the supply. It goes by pretty quickly. So I think when they posted it on Twitter to the time, it was gone in like less than 10 minutes. Outside a sexual health clinic in Chelsea, mixed reviews about the process of signing up for appointments. I'm just happy that they're able to roll it out as they have. Last week's initial rollout of the vaccines got off to a rough start. People reported glitches with the website and general booking confusion.
Starting point is 00:38:10 The line here in Chelsea has been pretty consistent all week, and the city says more appointments for vaccines are going to become available as they get another 14,000 doses later this week. Why? Vaccines are currently reserved for the most at-risk new yorkers which the health department says includes men who have intimate physical contact with other men in this current outbreak pause do you notice the language difference years ago it would have been homosexual men it's just another little they're very subtle men who have almost implying
Starting point is 00:38:43 that straight guys might, you know, you get drunk, suck a dick, hey, I get fucked up. You know what I mean? The guy was bowling good with me, looked good. Men who have intimate, you mean gay guys? You mean, can't say that? Seriously, the language is so guarded and fucked up that I can't even, I can't even, I'm watching sports and somebody gets hurt, they won't even tell you no.
Starting point is 00:39:05 Lower body, everything's a secret. Upper body injury, when people die now, I don't care who it is, they don't tell you. Alleged, alleged, alleged, alleged. Alleged, alleged, we don't know the reason for the death. Yeah, you do. They peeled him off under a truck. What do you mean? Everything is a, it's very odd. The case count in the Big Apple hit a whole 336 reported total cases on Wednesday, up
Starting point is 00:39:36 113 from Monday. Stop fucking each other in the ass. I don't mean to be insensitive. I mean, to each his own. Go nuts and stuff. But what I'm saying, like with AIDS, kept hearing, that doesn't discriminate. No, you're right. It only killed about a million homosexual guys, and I think 450 male figure skaters, a Haitian
Starting point is 00:40:03 choreographer, one construction worker got a biac. Given the second Monkey Parks Vax outage is as many weeks, we should be asking why the city isn't using the excellent Vax for New York City site. Is it an ownership problem? Is it a procurement issue? Is it an ownership problem? Is it a procurement issue? Asked huge my who built the widely popular Turbo Vax. Turbo Vax.
Starting point is 00:40:33 Get it? A website that helped New Yorkers navigate finding COVID shots during the early frustrating days and working on their W-9s. Frustrating days of the rollout. Vax4 NYC has been tested and proven over more than a year, and we should be adapting it now for monkey parks. There's no doubt it, said Manhattan Borough President Mark Levine. Very good fellow seen here. isn't it? Mark Levine, very good fellow, seen here. Health Commissioner Ashwin Vasan,
Starting point is 00:41:15 my primary care physician, reiterated those claims when asked by reporters why he opted against simply adopting the COVID system following this, how complicated life is, following the meltdown of the computer system provided by DOH MH vendor affiliated positions. He said it's a different endeavor, Bassett said, when pressed by reporters at an event in the Bronx. That's a mass vaccination program citywide, which has massive infrastructure associated with it. He added that DOH was building more stable vaccine appointment infrastructure. That's good news for a guy who's scratching his balls and bleeding from his eye as we speak. And that is working closely with the agency
Starting point is 00:41:51 that developed Vax4NYC. Liar! Liar! Liar! I knew you'd like that. Experts and former city officials told the Post, the argument makes little sense as a system capable of supporting a citywide vaccination effort should be easily able to handle the monkeypox program.
Starting point is 00:42:18 Whatever. Let's see how many times we get the word vaccine in one article. Here you go. Exactly. It's, you know, what do you call that type of advertising? Thank you. I'll give you a great subliminal joke. Tony V, he was in the movie with me, Louie's movie.
Starting point is 00:42:37 Good, really funny comic from Boston. But he used to have a joke in the subliminal. It was kind of big in the 80s. People, there was subliminal and he goes yeah we use that same type of uh strategy me my buddy go into bars try to pick up girls before we go in we draw we draw little dicks on our eyelids so then when we were talking to the girls we just blink before we uh break for the weekend obviously i, I got to thank you guys, the one-time contributions from Paul Sack. Can we mix the order up at least so it sounds like different people?
Starting point is 00:43:12 Paul Sack, Nellie, Connecticut, Kit Fortney, Michigan, Melody Watkey, Utah, Sean Powell, Florida, Matthew Chelfant, Kentucky, Joseph Weish, Florida. New Chalfant, Kentucky. Joseph Weish, Florida. New subscribers, and we're getting the Patreons picking up. Edvin Helland. Joseph Buckner. Brian Meek. Matt Altman and Stefan, who both just signed up for the whole year. Did you guys know you can pay for the whole year
Starting point is 00:43:46 at any level at Patreon and receive a 10% discount right off the top? People who sign up at the Michael and Vito level also get a free Nick DiPaolo show mug. So if you want extra stories every day, access to all the archives and that free mug. Check out my Patreon page. Again, thank you guys so much for making the show possible. That is it, ladies and gentlemen, for the week. I can't thank you enough. It was starting to pick up. My wife told me it's over 600 new YouTube subscriptions this week alone.
Starting point is 00:44:21 It's funny when you put a little weapon into the marketing, what can happen. Don't forget to sign up, please. Patreon.com. Thecomicsgym.com. Go to nickdip.com if you want to check out merchandise or check out my tour schedule. We're working on dates right now.
Starting point is 00:44:41 And cameo.com, which I already told you about, right? I did. And shout out.com, which I already told you about, right? I did. And Shoutout. Is it called Shoutout? Yeah, Shoutout.fans. Is it Shoutout? Is it not a detergent? Shoutout.fans,
Starting point is 00:44:56 which is like Cameo, only it's a bunch of liberty-loving people like us. And, you know, I can still roast. I'll do it in red and white underwear. I don't know. Something like that. That's it, I believe. You guys think it? I'll say it like I have been for 111 years. You guys have a great weekend. We'll see you back here on Monday. Take care. guitar solo guitar solo I'm out.

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