The Peacock and Gamble Podcast - The Peacock and Gamble Podcast: Edinburgh Fringe 2012 Episode 8 (Richard Herring Part 2)
Episode Date: November 1, 2020"Edinburgh Fringe 2012 Episode 8 (Richard Herring Part 2)" from archive.org was assembled into the "The Peacock and Gamble Podcast" podcast by Fourble. Episode 93 of 128....
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Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
Pickle and Gamble, Peacock and Gamble, Peacock and Gamble. Because it's not Ed Peacock and it's not Ray Gamble, but it is Ray Peacock and it is Ed Gamble.
Peacock and Gamble, Peacock and Gamble, Peacock and Gamble.
Here they are.
Peacock and Gamble Edinburgh Podcast. Welcome.
Hang on.
Welcome one and welcome all. I'm Ray Peacock.
My name is Ed Gamble.
Oh, lovely.
You had to clear your mouth there because you had a mouthful of hot doughnut.
And then you had to lick your fingers of sugar.
I agree to that.
I did lick my fingers of sugar, my thumb and my forefinger.
We're sat here trying to make this silent so we can record it properly,
and you're just looking at your fingers.
It must have been agonising just covered in sugar.
I had one little tiny bit of doughnut left in my mouth.
Because today you've bought fairground food.
Oh, you're straight in, aren't you?
I'm straight in, yeah.
You're straight in having a go at me.
Oh, excuse me for having a nice time at the Edinburgh Fringe.
Yeah, we are at the Edinburgh Fringe.
Sorry, we're doing a show.
Details of which we'll give you in a minute once we've got this out of the way.
Several times we'll do it.
Yeah, Ray Peacock has decided today to only eat fairground food.
Right, now hang on.
I didn't say I've decided to only eat fairground food.
Well, it's quarter past two in the afternoon.
Right.
What did you have for breakfast?
Two donuts. Right, what did you have for breakfast? Two donuts.
Right.
What did you have for lunch?
No, one and a half donuts, and I just had the other half now.
Okay, so that was your lunch, was it?
Half a donut.
And what else have you got there for pudding?
Candy floss.
Candy floss.
So, so far, all you've eaten is fairground food.
That's true.
And I've had a cup of coffee.
Is that from the fair?
Yeah, the people who run the fair have coffee.
Right, okay.
Well, I had one of their coffees as well.
Basically, I've wiped that away.
Are you having candy floss now?
I'm just going to try it.
It's not the best recording of a podcast.
I don't think I even like it, you know.
No, I hate candy floss.
I think it's absolutely vile.
No, it's not nice.
And it's not good to eat on a podcast
because it just sticks your mouth all together.
It's sugary.
Yeah, well, that's what it is.
It's sugar.
No, it's got sugar in it, hasn't it?
No, it's pure sugar.
No, no, it's got sugar in it, in the cotton wool.
It's not cotton wool with sugar in it.
Oh, yeah.
It's just sugar. Oh, no, it's got sugar in it, in the cotton wool. It's not cotton wool with sugar in it. Oh, yeah. It's just sugar.
Oh, and you're priceless.
How could that be just sugar?
It's wool.
Yeah, but they spin it.
It's spun sugar.
You are.
Right, okay, brilliant.
So this is just one thing.
Is that what that song's about?
What?
Spin, spin, sugar.
Spin, spin, sugar.
Making some candy floss.
Yeah, that would be what that's about.
This is just one of the litany of things that's making me worry about you and also quite annoyed.
Oh. We nearly flooded our bathroom this morning. Not my fault, right? It was your fault. No,
listen, I've been thinking about this. It's your fault. Why? Because you went in the shower
before me. Yeah, and everything was fine with that. Yes. Yeah. But, you're too big. I'm too big?
Yeah. So what happens is, you put the
shower head all the way up to the very
top. Yeah. I mean, it can't go further.
So I can fit in. Right. Yeah.
And I'm not interested in your dirty details.
Right? Then
I have to go in. I go in there, right?
Yeah. Just being a good boy. Yeah.
In the house. Yeah. And I go in there
and I go, that's too far up.
Now, the first time I ever did it, it knocked off and hit me on the nose.
It hit me on the foot before.
And hurt me, exactly.
Yeah.
So I've got to be actually careful.
But I'm reaching, no exaggeration, to my full stretched out heart.
Yeah.
To actually reach it.
And I think you're doing it tighter as well every single time.
I'm not.
You did it.
Because I have to go in there.
Yeah.
And I have to bend over to move it from where you set it.
Right.
I honestly didn't know you were this short until I started having to move the shower.
Missing, missing, right?
It's like something in Alice in Wonderland.
Like you're a little dwarf showering under a flower.
No.
Tiny little lad.
I have to bend over, unscrew it.
You did it very tight because you may be little, but you've got very strong muscles.
And push it all the way up to the top.
And I did say on the first day, do you want me to move you down after I've had a shower?
And I said, yes, please.
No, you said, no, it's all right, you don't have to do that.
Anyway, so I did that. I have to get in the bath with no clothes on, even though the shower's
not on yet and do that and I've got to avoid the little dribbles of cold water that comes
out of it as well, which sometimes just catch my nipple and make me go, whoa, whoa, whoa,
right? And then I have to lower it down.
And I think today when I was lowering it down,
being a very good boy,
what I did then was I think I might have nudged the shower curtain
just a bit over the bath, right?
Then I put the shower on, ready for going in.
Went to do my muck, right, in the toilet that I do in the morning.
Sat myself down, started doing my muck,
and then realised, I was looking across,
and realised that the shower was just literally,
and it's,
honestly,
you could clean patios
without a shower.
Yeah.
It's super strong.
Yeah, yeah.
And it was just,
just squirting all its water
onto the floor.
As you were squirting
your muck into the shower.
But I was doing my muck
at the time,
so I couldn't get over there
to help it.
I think you should have
gone over there
even though you had
a little bit of muck
coming out.
That would have made
the floor far worse.
At the moment,
it's just water. what have we established? The shower could have cleaned it.
Yeah clearly yeah. Could have cleaned the muck. Well look I've learned for tomorrow. Isn't that interesting?
Not tomorrow. Both of us. Both of us. Both of us today started the shower then did some muck then went in the shower.
Yeah. Yeah with the shower running. Yeah well yeah do you know what I mean? You're like when girls live together
and they all have their periods at the same time. Yeah or the boys start doing their muck at the same time.
Do my muck at the same time, I wet the bathroom floor.
That's alright, I don't think I've done anything.
So you flooded the bathroom, you're exclusively eating fairground food.
That reminds me, quick candy floss break.
No, it's not, oh God.
You two, why are you talking while I'm having it?
We did an interview this morning.
Mmm, very good.
It was fun, but you ruined it a little bit.
Why? For the sun?
Because it wasn't for the sun.
It's for Tommy, who works for the sun.
But he said that some of it might be for the sun.
It might be for the sun.
Unfortunately, I'd imagine not our one,
because all that really happened is that you stole something.
Mm-hmm.
He'd made a lovely effort to put on a sparkly gold table.
That's true.
Sparkly sequiny chairs.
Yeah.
Within four minutes, you'd ripped the sparkly sequin. That's true. Sparkly sequiny chairs. Yeah. Within four minutes,
you'd ripped the sparkly sequin bit
off your chair
and put it on as a poncho.
Well, I was going to have it as a cape,
and then I saw there was a big hole
in the middle of it.
Possibly even want to rip it off.
Yeah.
Just shove me a food up.
Put your head through that poncho.
Hey, presto, gold poncho.
Yeah.
Well, it ruined it.
It spoiled it a little bit.
Well, I think it made the interview better
because a lot of people go,
look at these two.
That little one's made an effort.
And you spoiled the Richard Herring
interview the other day as well.
The one we're doing now.
Yeah.
Today's one.
Yeah.
Well, I'm going to concede this.
Yeah.
It was a pre-record.
Yeah.
We had the first part yesterday.
That was quite nice, I thought.
Really nice.
Went swimmingly,
a little bit of tension at the top.
Yeah.
As there always is
between us and Herring.
Yeah.
But you ruined iton but you ruined it
as you ruined it
when we went on his podcast
and Naughty Keith
started calling him
what was it?
Mung
King Mung
but listen
you're saying
oh you ruined it
and then you said
Naughty Keith said
so that's what I'm saying
it was Naughty Keith
that ruined it
sooner or later mate
you're going to have to admit
that you are having
a breakdown
and Naughty Keith
have you ever seen
the Mel Gibson film
The Beaver
no I've not
but I think I would like it
well I think this is similar
to what's happening
I've only seen the trailer
but I think it's very similar
yeah yeah
I think I would like it
but I don't like Mel Gibson
I think he's horrible
I think he's brilliant
I used to really like him
let's have a bit of balance
every time you give an opinion
I'll give the opposite
alright then brilliant
I will go and watch
Paul Chowdhury's show I won will go and watch Paul Chowder's show.
I won't go and watch Paul Chowder's show.
Why?
I like wearing jeans.
I don't like wearing jeans.
I behave myself very well, I mean, to be Richard Herring.
That's not an opinion.
No, you've got to.
No, that's a lie, mate.
No, you can't. You've got to do it.
That's a lie, mate.
No, balance.
No, you didn't.
Right, shall we tell people what you said at this interview?
Right, we still don't know if it's going to go in the interview yet.
Right.
You said, you said mum.
Yeah.
Right.
I called him King Mum.
And that predated when, not me, when Naughty Keith did it on his podcast.
Yeah.
So this was just you.
So there's not even an excuse of mental illness of you having a bin bag on you.
Just having a joke.
Yeah.
You called him King Mum.
Richard,
in an interesting point, said
you've got to say something racist now to balance
that out. It's fine if you don't say
something racist. If you say something racist. Because it's exactly
the same thing. It's exactly the same, yeah.
So what did you say? I did say something racist.
But it was,
in my defence, it wasn't
a real thing. It was me.
Richard made me say it. Richard made me say it.
Richard made me say it.
That's the title we'll take with it.
Richard Herring is a racist enabler.
Richard Herring came on our podcast.
You'll hear it in the interview now, possibly.
Richard Herring came on our podcast and told us to be racist.
Yeah, he did, yeah.
Yeah.
And the thing is with Richard Herring is he's all like,
no, I'm liberal.
I'm not racist.
I like everyone.
I'll get other people to do it for me. I'll get other people to put money in that no, I'm liberal. I'm not racist. I like everyone. I'll get other people
to do it for me.
I'll get other people
to put money in that bucket, right?
Yeah.
What he does then
is he tempts other people
to do it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He goes,
oh, come over here.
Do that thing.
And then he cackles away.
Ha, ha, ha.
That's what I like.
Do you know what?
I bet Richie Nairn
was round Ricky Gervais' house
the night before.
Yeah, on Twitter.
Go on, Ricky.
Put them on once.
I bet I did. It was round Ricky Gervais' house, alright, and they're having a laugh, you know,
showing off his mates and all that. Yeah.
And then I bet Richard Owen was going, Ricky, that face you keep doing is brilliant.
You look like a right mong. And then Ricky went, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, that's what the credible comedians are, that's what they all say, all the stand-ups and that.
So I will, and Richard went, went oh you should put them on Twitter mate
because you'd look like
a right mong when you do that
and then Ricky's gone on
and gone mong mong mong
and then Richard has gone
right
not having that
hang on
what
Richard
Ricky
what's Ricky short for
Richard
it's the same bloke
exclusive
for the Peacock and Gamble
Edinburgh podcast
it's two sides
of the same coin
they are rowing with each other,
like when I done that Twitter ventriloquism act.
It's like Two-Face, sort of.
It's very similar to Two-Face.
Yeah.
Well, look, apologies in advance for the naughty bit,
but it was a deliberately naughty bit.
It was, yeah.
And we have hummed and hard about putting it in.
Interestingly, we were discussing it,
and we thought, let's bleep the second thing I said.
But we can't, because that proves the point, doesn't it?
Yeah, that's exactly Richard's point. So he but we can't because that proves the point yeah that's exactly
Richard's point
so he has got us
over a barrel
yeah yeah
people put money
in the barrel
as he goes past
the scope
yeah exactly
and please do that
because apparently
there's been a fall off
in his scope money
this year
yeah
so if you go and see
Richard's show
put money in the bucket
don't be a twat
yeah and put money
in our bucket as well
and then we'll tell you
what it's for at the end
yeah we've got a bucket
as well for scope
which is
Sexy Company
at Peacock Emporium.
Sexy Company
at Peacock Emporium.
That was an exclusive bit
of what Ray calls improv.
Improv that.
And if you come to our show
you'll be able to see
some of that.
See loads of that.
Just on the spot.
Imagine Skate
so you can come up
with anything you want
and Ray came up with
sexy company
at peacock employer
so
that's brilliant isn't it
you do want them
scape
now
um
sad
cunts
ate
penis eggs
yeah that's what
that is also what
our charity is for as well
for the sad little cunts what ate their penises.
And unfortunately we've got to collect money for them to take them on an adventure other than.
So, here's the second part of the Richard interview. If you, look, there'll be people complaining about it, but if you've got half a brain you'll see what happens.
Yeah.
Don't forget our show is Peacock and Humble, don't even want to be on telly anyway. 9.40 at the Pleasant's
Dome.
Dome.
Okay we're getting
your hot dogs now.
Oh yes.
Peacock and Gamble.
Peacock and Gamble.
What's Stuart Lee
like in real life?
I think they're quite
nice in real life.
Stuart Lee is it?
Yeah.
Oh.
Stuart Lee.
Dustin G written down.
Got next up. Sorry carry on. I'll do my research next time. he's he's all he's sort of similar he is an a um
the thing is when we work together we work together all the fucking time yeah uh like all
the time i don't know how much spent time you two spend together but we would like really and when
we met at university we did stuff for three years then we came to london lived in the same house
begin with and we're sort of writing writing and live in the same writing and you know doing everything it was so
we just sort of argued a lot as we as certainly as it progressed and i think we're both kind of
quite competitive in different ways but and both you know both had very strong views about what we
thought was funny and what wasn't funny so we'd spend a day arguing about a word in a sentence
when when you look back you think actually a or the would have worked yeah it doesn't matter which one it was they were both often you'd argue for a long time
about something but both versions were funny you know and there was no there's no way of really
saying which is properly funny unless you went and did it in front of 20 audiences and took a
clapometer with you yeah but um you know we would we'd sort of waste a lot of time but we
it became a little bit stressful but since since we've stopped working with each other,
it's always kind of nice to see him
and he's usually quite friendly.
When you're working together,
if you're just knocking about in the house
where you live together,
which sounds lovely, by the way,
and I would like that.
I've said that for a while.
I would like it if me and her lived together.
Yeah, I think it'd be a nightmare.
I think it'd be brilliant.
Did you, when it was just you two together,
was it vaguely herbarotic?
Did you ever make funny jokes about,
oh, we'll kiss each other?
No.
Right, well, then we thought of that.
Whenever we had to do anything,
even a little bit like that,
when there was a Thelma and Louise sketch we had to do
where we were dressed up as women
and we were meant to the end,
obviously the joke was instead of driving over the cliff,
they decided to lez up at the end of the...
Nice.
And so what we did was we just sort of went...
We stuck out our tongues and just kept our heads away from each other and felt each other's breasts. And so what we did was we just sort of went, we stuck out our tongues
and just kept our heads
away from each other
and felt each other's breasts.
And the director said,
it would be better
if you actually kissed
when it said,
no, no,
this is much funnier
doing this.
So we were actually,
and it was kind of funny
that the idea of lezzing up
was to just touch
each other's breasts
while licking your own breasts.
That's the boys' idea.
But also,
I think we would have
just been massively
uncomfortable about
even pretending
to do that for a joke.
So I don't think,
maybe because there was a real, tension rather rather we're kissing on
the back of our flyer we might have kissed him and we might we might have done something you know but
we we always felt quite awkward when we touched each other but when we were students he tried to
wank me off with a ventriloquist dummy yes and also once in a pub when he was really drunk he
tried to get my cock out when and he was just properly trying to get it out and I wasn't drunk
maybe if I had been
it could have been
a different story
he was going
leave me alone
he was going
no come on
he was in the pub
anyway we were in the pub
he was actually
trying to get my cock out
I don't think he remembers
that one
maybe he was going
I just can't
I just want to talk about it
I just want to talk about it
and that is my idea
so maybe
maybe we were even more
repressed
and really truly
in love with each other
that we couldn't even
joke about it
but I think it was
it was sort of
an odd relationship
because you know
we did
there was this sort of
there was this element
of competition
within it I think
that I don't think
was very helpful
for the double act
and Stu was always
a little bit reluctant
to be doing the double act
or he could play that card
anyway
for me the double act
was everything
or nearly everything
I was doing Edinburgh shows
on my own
and doing other stuff
but I wasn't doing stand up
and the double act
very much became
my whole focus
and he was doing solo stand up but i think he sort of was able even if
even this wasn't the case he was able to play this card of you know i'm you know i'm doing this to
help you out right okay you know and i'm doing my own thing and i you know i think in the end it was
it was good for us both to have had that all that time working together and then go off and do our
own thing yeah and i think it was right you know it was definitely the right decision for him i
think to do solo
stuff that he could
do with a funny
bloke coming in and
messing around.
If you were in a
film together now
if you were cast in
a film together now
would you be able
to kiss him now
though?
I think he would
find it.
Don't worry about
him.
I was always
If I brought him
in here now
say he was here
I would do it
I would do it
right now.
And I brought him
in you would kiss
him on the lips.
If it was for a
film.
Right.
If I was filming
it.
Just say for argument's sake he's here now right. Just say that. I'll do it right and I brought him in you would kiss him on the lips if it was for a film right if I was filming just say for argument's sake
he's here now
right
just say that
I'll do it
for argument's sake
he wants to do it
I'll do it
I think
we're both quite
self conscious
we're both
we think way too much
about everything
and I'm socially
very self conscious
I think
and he's
we're both
it's almost
a kind of crippling form
of self-consciousness,
you know,
that it sort of stops you
doing stuff in real life.
I found by doing comedy
I can get all that stuff
out on stage
and it's sort of fine,
whereas I don't think Stu did.
Stu never really liked
doing sketches or stuff.
You know,
he liked to do
and be himself.
He didn't really ever
like doing characters
and I think when he really
let himself go
in acting,
he was really brilliant
and really funny. I think Pliny, from History go in acting he was really brilliant and really funny
I think Pliny
from History on Pliny
is genuinely
the funniest thing
he's ever done
that's my favourite
one as well
it's the man
with the puppet
that says
shut up
he doesn't say that
he doesn't say that
but you know
and when he really
you know
with something
like The Teachers
or when they did
the seven thing
where he had to be Brad Pitt
I wasn't in that one
but all the boys in that one
it's Kev being
Kevin Spacey
and
Kevin Eldon
he's being casual
Carlton Vixen
who was one of
our associate producers
and he's written other stuff
since then
was Morgan Freeman in it
and they really
because they had guns and stuff
they really started taking it
really seriously
and then really acting properly
so when he tried
he's
almost like too self-conscious to to fail so you know it's right it's that thing where you're a bit
cool yeah and so you don't want to you it's better not to try something because if you fail it looks
stupid but if you don't try it you can look kind of cool yeah i think a little bit but when he let
himself go he was always really funny and i think what's interesting with this stand-up now is he i
think he's much more playful and uh you know childish at times. I mean, we basically both do each other in the solo acts.
Oh!
We have conversations.
What?
Mate!
Richard!
That is disgusting.
That's not an act.
What sort of act is that?
What would you call an act like that?
But yeah, he does my voice.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're having conversations with him.
We're having a dialogue
with ourself
we'll use each other's voice
a little bit
I remember chatting to you
about that
when he
what's his thing
called
the comedy vehicle
yeah
when that first series
of that
and he was doing
and it was you
yeah
it was very much you
but there was no reference
at all
it was me
and I wasn't in it
and everyone else
this morning
Richard on duty
was in it
it was kind of a bit like
hold on
yeah
and people are always
going Stu
Stu
it does sound like
Richard
people are doing
Richard mainly
was doing that
did he not even
ask you to be in it
he did ask me to be
in one sketch
and then they kind of
didn't
they didn't want to do it
but no he's never
really asked me to be
in any like
he does all these
little curated shows
and his favourite
stand ups
and he's doing this
show for for his alternative
Michael McIntyre show
of good acts.
And you're wearing that.
We're doing that.
Are we?
Yeah.
Wind him up.
Wind him up with it.
He sounds horrible.
Sounds like a horrible boy.
He is horrible.
He's made me feel like he's horrible.
But I think it's sort of
you've got to kind of
move on, haven't you?
So it's kind of we get occasion to do of move on haven't you so it's kind of
we get occasion
to do little things together
and we did a podcast together
what podcast
Leicester Square Theatre podcast
the future
Chorton Award winning podcast
we done
do you remember when we done
the Leicester Square
for years ago
yep
we done that
the Ray Peacock podcast
the little
our final one
more underground our one
but it's still sold out now
yeah
yeah ours was more underground
and for a more specific audience.
It's genuinely more underground.
Yeah, massively underground.
One layer down.
Couldn't be further under the ground.
The main room is still underground, though.
Oh, yeah, isn't it?
So we are more underground than that one.
You're under the underground.
Yeah.
You're like the Wombles.
Yeah, we didn't even have stage lights.
We just waited for a tube to go past it.
And that is how it lit it.
Oh, well, that's good then.
I'm glad that you had a nice time on your podcast with him.
We're in Edinburgh now, technically.
Just pretend we are.
Right, pretend we are.
What have you got to cheer us up now it's all going badly?
Yeah.
The idea that if you do it for about another seven fringes
we haven't got that time
it'll start to get fun
no we need to be like, you know when someone just goes
where have these guys come from
you know when that happens in Edinburgh
you don't know, it happens to you
but you had your five star eventually
because for ages you were whining
that you didn't have a five star review
I've always had reasonably good reviews
and to be honest they didn't do a five star review but you know I've always had reasonably good reviews but they weren't and to be honest
they didn't do stars
really many
the papers all started
putting stars in
oh that's a no star review
yeah
you'd never had a star
no they always
they always did them Richard
they were always
they're just not
I think even the Scotsman
you know I've been
go back so far
I mean they all start doing
I think a lot of them
are stopping doing it
because the thing is
if you put stars on
people just look at the stars
and they don't read the reviews
it's not helpful for the journalist it's good for the comedian they could put put stars on it just people just look at the stars and they don't read the reviews it's not helpful for the journalist yeah it's good for
the comedian they could put five stars on if they but then even if you get four stars i think not
five stars so you can get like pissy about it which i think i you know i thought i felt then
that was 10 years ago you know i was sort of thinking i've been up here so many times it's
kind of bizarre that i'm not and i was struggling to get an audience i really i genuinely didn't
really there's lots of great things i liked about it, and it was really good to...
I was writing plays and really pushing myself
and trying different things.
But I genuinely didn't enjoy it
until probably 2007 was probably the first year I started doing it.
But if we want a quick fix to this...
What we want is...
Someone's coming along and going,
right, this is what a great live experience.
Yeah.
What we want to do
is we then want a
disappointing transfer
to television.
And then for it
to all just fall apart
and both just get on
with their own things.
Yeah,
yeah.
Someone just,
what?
Well,
we have to travel back in time
to when there were less
people trying.
Here's what we need,
right?
This is an ideal world,
right?
You know that you get
a word of mouth in that
and it's like,
oh,
all the comedians like them different are brilliant brilliant and then that sort of spills out
listen can you not right you know some people yeah right now all right i am sorry about all
the fun that we have poked at you over the years and i hope you know that it was all in jest and
that we did do the podcast first that is true and then you did one as well but and we're not even
bothered about that and we're not even bothered that you won the chortle awards over us all right we are bothered
about that but but it's like we're not you're not jealous and that we like we think you're a nice
boy and like you and you're always very kind and you've agreed to come on the show thank you
and also specifically for me because you had a short fat area one in a double act and i can
relate with that because i know how horrible that can be he was in one with steve lee i'm telling
you right we're just in jane right now listen so what we need really ideally
and you've done it once on twitter i think where you say oh oh they are really good right because
like sometimes your fans come to you on twitter and go yeah but i see i don't even twitter isn't
enough now but listen just listen what we need but i can do it but i have to do it all the time
yes yes yes this is what i've been doing this morning, right?
I put on Twitter, how does a show get buzz?
And then straight afterwards I put, I've been hearing a lot of buzz about Peacock and Gamble.
Yeah, right.
And a couple of people have caught on to it and they've been saying, if you, straight after this, right? Yeah.
Go and say, I've been hearing a lot of buzz about Peacock and Gamble.
Right, he's got his phone now.
Right.
Just do it now.
Yeah, do it now.
Because the other day you said Naughty Keefer, you liked it a lot.
I did Naughty Keefer, it was very funny. That do it now. Yeah, do it now. Because the other day you said Naughty Keefer, you liked it a lot. I did. Naughty Keefer's very funny.
That's the sentence.
Don't make it funny.
Just say it.
I am hearing a lot of buzz.
I'm going to put a little code in for my fans so they know I'm being sarcastic.
I like you guys.
I think you've made me laugh more than I've laughed all year.
Right, thanks.
That's a good start.
Probably even longer than that.
And did I mention about the bloke on Twitter who said to him that they're listening to you?
Yeah. And I liked that you said back to him that, um, did this in you? Yeah.
And I liked that you didn't,
um,
that you said back to him,
um,
that,
yes,
they are awesome.
And then I put it in and went,
I don't think that's what
he wanted you to say.
Um,
but I,
last year in Edinburgh,
I wrote a blog about saying,
you know,
I'm,
I think the way Stuart
became successful in Edinburgh
was just to sort of tell everyone
he was brilliant.
And then it started getting printed up.
So I said,
I sort of decided in my blog and in the podcast to say i was going to say people
been calling me the king of edinburgh yeah and then and then they start to call it then but then
people join in with it and start calling the king of edinburgh but within a year or two you can just
put king of edinburgh yeah i mean i could already do it i can put the king of edinburgh the list
because they did they did print that so then it, you know, it can become this sort of self- The newly American.
The newly American.
Right, why don't we now, now that we're in Edinburgh now,
why don't us, Peacock and Gamble and Richard Herring,
have an arrogant race?
And see who can be the most arrogant about and petulant about themselves.
Right.
So we'll start that off.
We're better than Richard Herring.
Right, now you reply to that.
No, I'm better than Peacock and Gamble put together.
Yeah, well.
If that's what they're called.
I've lost heart with Richard.
Right, you have won that.
I'm looking forward to, I'm going to tweet this now.
What does it say?
I'm hearing a lot of buzz about Peacock and Gamble.
I bet you five people will tweet about it before the end of this conversation saying,
are they bumblebees?
Or something like that.
Right, okay.
This is what I hate about Twitter now, is you have to kind of self-censor
before you put something in
in order to think about
what joke the people
are going to make
I either have to put
the joke in it
or don't put this joke
about this
or try and write it
in a different way
so they won't do it
I did a joke about
how it would be good
if Big Brother
contestants
if there was a press gang
to get Big Brother
contestants
so the joke being
that they didn't choose it
that it was just
that someone went
and hit people over the head
and you got put in the Big Brother house.
I tweeted and thought,
everyone's going to just say,
what, Julius Suwala and Dexter Fletcher?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I still tweet and that's exactly what happened.
You've kissed her!
I have.
Dexter Fletcher?
Yeah, he has kissed Dexter Fletcher!
I've kissed a girl who's kissed Dexter Fletcher.
Ugh.
Don't follow that thought.
I imagine you could just taste brute in a mouth.
I think Dexter Fletcher wears brute, definitely.
The other day you tweeted, I can't see any good reason as to why David Blunkett doesn't
have Twitter.
Yeah.
And someone tweeted back with, he wouldn't be able to see or answer his tweets.
I nearly tweeted that.
Sorry, I retweeted it.
I nearly tweeted back and said, well well Chris McCawson is on Twitter
and he's blind
so there must be
some way of doing it
yeah
but you are always
defending all the disabled people
aren't you
you are the
you are the king of Edinburgh
and you are the king
of the disabled people
I am
they're like my
they're my little bat
I believe it
to be honest
that's not a difficult crown to steal
they'll do my bidding
whenever I want
that's the thing
I can follow
you are
don't get angry at this,
you are King Mong.
Right.
Now that was just a,
no that was a,
listen,
that was a play on words
for King Kong,
so don't get angry about it.
That was,
unlike Mr Gervais,
I can defend that joke.
It was a pun,
it was,
it's hard,
it was a pun.
It's hard,
and I'm going to even now say.
Well as long as you do one
using a racial epithet next,
then I'm happy.
As long as you,
as long as you appreciate that that is the same.
Right, then.
As saying...
Right, you are King Paki.
Right, then.
There is one now.
Okay.
So you can't say that.
That wasn't successful.
Give me another naughty thing to say.
Richard Ayer is telling me to say naughty things.
I'll say something
this interview's over
isn't it
this is how
comedians work
hey pushing the
boundaries
you went there
I went there
sister
yeah
have you tweeted it
three tweets in so
far
yeah
it's the flies
royal and doodle
says it's the flies
what are those ones
they are the best
double act single
singly in Herring.
I think they mean
since.
Your fans can't even
spell the word since.
We are like a single
in Herring.
They are the best
double act single
in Herring.
I wish they had said
they are the better
one double act since.
Fail to load
the term line.
Herring 96.7
Ed Fringe if you will.
Smile Edinburgh Fringe if you will smile
Edinburgh Fringe
don't understand
right so
I think
I think we can wrap
this interview up now
knowing that the buzz
for Peacock and Gumball
has been only strengthened
by Richard Herring
can you do that like
maybe once a day
yeah sure
I think
see I think
even when I tweet
about anything I'm doing
like
it makes about three people out of the 96,000.
That's fine.
That's fine.
It's my fringe, will you?
Because we do it every day.
So one of us every day has to remind Richard to say,
Richard, buzz tweet.
And then Richard has straight away got to say some sort of thing about,
oh, there is a lot of buzz about Peacock and Gamble.
Oh, Peacock and Gamble are the big buzz.
Here's one as well.
This is one because I searched my name on Twitter as well.
Same.
You've got to stop doing it, man.
I like it.
Just saw Richard Herring was going to say,
Hi, I'm listening to your podcast.
Then realised he wasn't Adam Buxton.
That's quite sweet, though.
Yeah.
Imagine if it had said,
But unfortunately he was with Ray Peacock.
It was the better one.
It was the better of the two people
and we're both nice
well it's been lovely
to be here
at the Edinburgh Fringe
it has hasn't it
and is your show
going well yes
are you selling out
yes fine
we're not
well I think
the Olympics
is having an effect
on the ticket sales
no you're thinking
of the Paralympics
sorry I'm sorry
it makes me want
to be naughty
when I see you
you're in the big purple car, aren't you?
I'm in the upside down, underbelly car.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, listen to this.
Our stage manager was speaking to us the other day,
who's also your stage manager, Sophie.
And guess what?
She had a dream.
This is genuinely true.
Genuinely true, right?
How do you feel about this?
She had a dream that she broke her leg.
Yeah.
So couldn't get from your show to our show
in time.
So decided to just
do our show.
Yeah.
Blimey.
What do you think of that?
That's awful.
She wants to just do our show.
That means subconsciously
that she only wants
to do our show.
She does.
I feel slighted.
I haven't even started yet.
She doesn't want to sit
for yours.
What she's subconsciously
probably saying.
So how do you feel about that?
I'm a bit upset
and I'm going to have a sack. I'm going to get a sack. Oh, that I'm a bit upset and I'm going to
have a sack
going to get a sack
going to get a sack
from the whole
Edinburgh
I can do that
I can go in and
say listen I've
heard some bad
stuff going down
and take out just
one random other
staff member from
Edinburgh as well
really
is that how in
with our management
you are
I'm in the upside
down purple cow
I'm not in what
you in
the big horse we're in the upside down purple cow. I'm not in what you're in.
The big horse.
We're in the upside down black box.
The massive horse.
We're at the dome.
Oh, that's all right.
Try and remember the name
of the specific room
right now.
There's lots of different
names in there.
The, the, the...
Never remembers it.
Never remembers it.
The Richard Herring dome.
The Richard Herring dome.
Queen dome.
Joker dome's not a room anymore.
You're as bad as each other. I keep saying Joker dome. Joker dome. Queen dome. King domedome. The Richard Herringdome. Queen Dome. Joker Dome's not a room anymore. You're as bad as each
other.
I keep saying Joker
Dome.
Joker Dome.
Queen Dome.
King Dome.
We're not.
No.
King Dong.
King Dong.
King Dong.
Don't start that joke
again.
That's another one.
There's another play on
words for you.
King Dong.
That's another one.
Yeah that's a real
bloke.
Like his show
Talking Cock what he's
doing.
King Donger.
Oh yeah.
Are we going to give
the show a plug now?
Will that do?
Yeah, that'll do.
Don't forget,
I'm also doing
Richard Haring's Edinburgh Fringe podcast.
Oh yeah.
We were considering
interviewing Stu backstage
at your podcast.
That's alright.
And then you can come in
and go,
what are you doing?
We'll go, nothing.
Peacock and Gamble,
Peacock and Gamble.
And that was the
second concluding part
of the interview
with Richard Idiot Penis Herring.
I realise we didn't call him that in the first section at all.
So Richard Idiot Penis Herring, that's his full name.
I didn't even listen to that.
I was just like, I'm finishing my candy floss.
You're finishing your candy floss.
I mean, you look a bit wired now.
You look a bit sort of...
I think there is sugar in it.
Yeah, it's all sugar, mate.
That is a bag of sugar you've just eaten.
I think there is some sugar in it.
You know like a bag of sugar you would get like a teaspoon of sugar for your tea with?
Yeah.
You've had a bag of that.
A whole bag of sugar. Right. You've sat here sugar for your tea with you've had a bag of that a whole bag of sugar
right
you've sat here
yeah
while Richard's interview
was on then
yeah
and you've eaten
a bag of sugar
whoa
it's mental isn't it
that's brilliant
it's not brilliant
so if I get one of them a day
yeah
which I'm intending to
yeah
that would be a bag of sugar
a bag of sugar a day mate
so that's my daily allowance
of sugar
you know what I'm looking forward to
no mate
your daily allowance of sugar
is not one bag.
How many bags is it?
No bags.
What are you talking about?
Maybe like...
You're not allowed any sugar in a day.
Maybe like a tablespoon.
Mate, you're off your head, yeah?
I'm not off my head.
Mate, I think you're on a drug.
I am, insulin.
Am I on a bag?
Which I think I'm going to have to take some of, just because that's big in the atmosphere.
Right, well do you know why I bought this?
What?
Because it has got a lighthouse on the front.
That's not a lighthouse.
It's a helter-skelter
and you've just eaten
a bag of sugar.
Oh, I am.
Right, I won't get it again.
Right, unfortunately
I think there's going to be
a big crash of energy
before our show.
Yeah.
Right when we need it,
just at 9.40
at the Pleasant Stone
to Dome Dome.
Dome Dome?
Yeah, for people who can gamble
don't even want to be
on telly anyway
because you've eaten
a bag of candy floss
for lunch.
Right, well I'm done
two full now
from my sugar
so I'm going to let
Richard's stupid
idiot penis
do the credits
and just get it
finish it
the Peacock and Gamble
Edinburgh podcast
is a ready production
hosted by
why does everyone
laugh at that
because it's not ready
no look
hosted by
chortle.co.uk
five stars
today's guest was
Blank blank
No you say you
Okay
Today's guest was
Richard Herring
That is me
Yeah
That's an odd way for me
To refer to myself
Today's guest was me
And my show is
Talking Cock
The Second Coming
And Richard Herring's
Edinburgh Fringe Podcast
Coming
Coming
Ejaculation
The uncensored
The coming
Yeah
The come is fine
how do you spell it though
c-o-m-i-n-g
because I felt
it was too
explicit to put you in
see I think about
these things
you're listening to
the credits
it makes it not
a pun doesn't it
if you put come
just read the rest
of the credits
all the music in this
except for this bit
boopity boop
boopity boop
where it's done by
Thomas van der rey right it's done by Thomas Funderay.
Right, it's Vanderey, right?
Alright, Thomas Funderay.
That's phonetically how you pronounce it.
Okay, Thomas Vanderey.
Funderay.
Okay, Thomas Funderay.
This is, I mean, that poor lad.
Every single show we do, people go,
what on earth name is that?
I believe Matt didn't even try.
He had a go at it.
I will see you tomorrow.
No, I won't.
No, you won't
if you can't listen to
Richard Hanks
then
go and download
see you
thanks for listening
download that now
see how much fun he is
Richard
thank you very much indeed
for coming on our
programme
my pleasure
we are mates in real life
goodnight
bye bye