The Ricky Gervais Show / An Idiot Abroad - Xfm S0E8 (May 31, 1998)

Episode Date: September 2, 2022

Gervais and Merchant first worked together in radio on the London-based alternative radio station Xfm London. Their show was broadcast from January to August 1998 from 4–6pm on Sundays, and only featured Gervais and Merchant (before their collaboration on The Office). The show's original format was more interactive, with features, guests, phone-ins, and audience interaction through listeners' letters.

She's a Mary Chain, the Black, on XFM, 104.9, it's 10 past 4, after the break, Oasis. Oasis, married with children. Yeah. XFM, 104.9, it's the Ricky Javais show. Who am I, Steve? Javais? You are, Javais. Yeah. You are, Rivaes. Yes, it's the sign signing autographs in the week? Is this true? Is this true what I've heard?

A couple, yeah. What's the story? Tell me. Well, we did this road show from the Doc Martin store. Yeah. Yeah, was it that impressive. Surrounding this. That was good fun. You played some records. People were coming up with there and asking for your, asking for your autograph. Yeah. Incredible. Wow, you know, I'm a bit of a celebrity, Steve, I'll be honest. If you were really rich, what would you spend your money on? You know what I spent money on. Yeah? Just more food and

drink than I do now. Maybe a few extra holidays. How many people, for Autograss? I don't know. 30? Yeah. What about Crowley? Did anyone ask Crowley for an order? Now they kept asking him if they got this in the size 7? He's getting really honest. He does look a bit like a sort of spotty shop assistant. Yeah. Yeah. I'll just go and check with Maureen. Meantime here's Idol Wilde. I've got a joke have you yeah brilliant we've we're allowed to tell one joke can't me a show because I don't want it to sound like you know Steve Pink or no no no no see Pink I love Pink's pink pink's good I'm a big fan of pink that is great don't get me started on pink no if I start singing the places of pink we'll be all night I know the point the point is you know you've got a nice the pn't the p I the p no the p no the p no the point I the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the the the the the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point I'm you the point I'm you you you you you the point I'm the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the the the the the the the the the the the the th the the the the the point the the the the point is the point is the point is the point is the point the point the point the point the point the point the point the point Let's hear it. A little boy, he's only five years old. He's lost in a busy high street and he's crying his eyes out. Well, he would.

He's lost his mummy. He's going, I've lost my phone. And he goes, all right, what's the matter? He goes, I've lost my mommy. Please say, all right, don't worry, we'll find her. What she like. Instant repeater, 99 soundtrack of our lives on XFM 104.9. Gervais, can I just give the listeners one very good reason why they should stay tuned? There are prizes up for grabs very soon.

Another of your fantastic movie quizzes is on the way, Javais. Give me one reason why I should stay then. After the break, blur. Bluze. Bluh. Blood sweat and come. Sweat and Come. Blood Sweat and Come by Brain Mangle, Out Now. The new single from Velvet Na-Sexi.

The new single from Velvet Nazi 666 UK is F. Like a rhino. The animals went two by two. A fuck you like rings. I'm gonna fuck like a rhino. F. F. Like a rhino from velvet Nazi 666 UK. The UK is important. I'm Tracy Jackson, XFM, 104.9 I really am a very good DJ.

Well, yeah, maybe. 01715-0202. Do you agree with that statement? Is Ricky Jovey's a very good DJ? Javey's looking at the cover of the news of the world today? I'm shocked. I mean we all know, I mean how are you coping, how are you getting through the days? I'm in shock. I'm in that's th. I'm in th. I'm in th. I'm in th. I'm in th. I'm in th. I'm in the the the th. I'm in the the the the the th. the th. the th. th. the the th. th. I'm the th. I'm th. th. th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th. th. the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. the the th. th. th. the the th. th. the of the News of the World today. I'm shocked. I mean, we all know, I mean, how are you coping? How are you getting through the days? I'm in shock. I'm sort of pretending it hasn't happened on playing like the old records. I know, I know exactly that. Yeah, the spice girls were on that she was bullied out of the group by Scary Spice. Apparently Scary Spice, Mel B is absolutely vicious,

lots of you know, lots of remarks about Jerry, you know always sniping and going at her. Well this must be particularly close to your heart because you were bullied at school by a pop star, weren't you? I was indeed. It was that? Lionel Ritchie. Yeah it was a nightmare. The thing? Lionel Ritchie. Yeah. It was a nightmare. The thing was, Lionel had just left the Commodores. Yeah. And he had a lot of pent up nervous energy. Do I mean, which used to take out on me, but probably me in the face.

Yeah, it was just annoying. Yeah, it was just annoying. What year was this? big hit with dancing on the ceiling. Sure enough. He would all, hold on, he'd been flying high before that with Hello. Well exactly that, you see, the thing was, you know, you know, he'd had a string of top ten hits. I was about 14, I didn't have the chart credibility with which to fight back. Do you know what I mean? Often you would just be throwing my satch, you know, and singing the tree. they, you th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin, thin, th. the thin, the tho, tho, you'd tho, you'd the thing, you'd the thing. the thing, he'd the thing, he'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing, you'd the thing. He. He. He's, you'd the thing. He's, he's, you'd the thing. He's thin. thin. He's they. thin, you know, he'd they. thr. He'd they. He'd they. He'd they. He'd they. He a great singing voice. I haven't got salt. That is terrible. That is terrible. But you had a similar problem, didn't you? Were you not bullied by a band? Were you not bullied by a band? Yeah, Hanson? Well, they're bastant. Yeah. That was a bastard. You're not a one but I was a kid really, really well. And then. then. then. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the th. the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. thee. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeea. theeee. the. the. th. th news that Jerry Halliwell has left the Spice Girls, XFM has set up a helpline for distressed fans.

If you need a shoulder to cry on, call Ricky Jervais on 0171, 580, 2000. Hello. Hello. I know Andy, yeah, oh no, I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know Andy, Andy, yeah, I know. Okay. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's terrible. But, but listen, I want you to think of all the good, good times she's given people. The record she was on still exist. They'd always be there. I can't believe it's going to be the end of her career. She's a very, very taunted young lady. And of course there's always the, you know, the photos of her. There's photos on the internet.

I'm not talking publicity. Jants. Filch. Yes. Yes. I mean, there's one right. I don't know how they got away with it. She's got these two. Hello? Hello? Well anyway, she's got these two. The XFM, Ginger Helpline, Ono 171, 580, 2000. What's your finger with me?

Ricky, Jervais, XFM. 2000. What you think it's me? Ricky Juvay's XFM I'm not the lie to you, that was half the pain and jump around. Don't lie to me, don't ever lie to me. No, that is. That was the pain, jump around. We were jumping around. Of course.

We've got no shame. XFm, 1-4. Yeah, be honest, after the ad break, there'll be another record. Is there going to be another record? Definitely. There's going to be an ad break? Yeah. You're not lying to me? No. Really? Muff Shandy says, turn it up. Ear plugs are gay. Earplugs are gay. Hear what I say now.

Ear plugs are gay. Get them out so way now. Feel the need to make the bleed. My brain needs noise and speak. Mother F*** Mother F***a. The new single by Muffshandy. Earplugs are gay. Do you know what I mean? I really feel psyched up after them.

So do I, I just want to, oh, it's just short me there. I was shadow boxing again, it was incredible. It was incredible. Good job Pitts was here because you can hit him as hard as you like and he can't feel it. As you can't hit him and he can't feel it as you like. Well, it's a little bit of a couple of minutes. That little bloke that used to laugh, I used to prod him. No idea what they talking about? Oh, 1,000, 5802,000. Everyone phones say, Steve, you're a twat, of course remember Pills Be Dows, so don't try and remember Pills Pee Doe, so don't try and do that one on me.

You'll try carry on talking. I'm just, hmm, let me think. Let me think. No, I'll come up with something. This is a mull over a mate of yours in Bristol. Did you, do you know, uh, you know Cherry Wise? No? Ah, no, no. No, I'll come up with something. What was this thing?

What was it called? The Pillipo-o, the. the, the, the, the, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I. I, th. I, th. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th. I, I'm. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, to. I, to. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. You. Did. Do. Do. Do. Do. You. Do, the. Do, the. Do, the. I, the. I, the. I, the. I, the. I, the. Do, you. Do, you. Do, you. Did, do 0171, 580, 2000. Where did it come from? Proved me wrong. Where did it come from? What's the name of a thing? What do you mean a thing? What is it? The pastry mix?

Is it a toy? No. Is it a toy? No! What? What? You still play with food. This is going nowhere. Shut up. No, forget it! Right, after the ad break, Jamie and his magic torch.

Yeah, I remember that. I remember that. What's that little kid in the comics had the magic pipes? He'd go past an ad of like a woman eating a cream bun, and the cream bun would come to life. You know what I mean? Now at 14 you'd be getting different material wouldn't he to bring to life? Don't remember him? It was in a comic book. Are you on crack? Oh, I love it. When Granddad gets out the bath, his skin so clean and smooth. But after a hard day squelching around, sawness can cause discomfort.

New panderas with hellopaha, ha haught ha ha, creamy stuff acts as a clunge protector. And the new dry weave chicken wings soak up all the piss and shit so Granddad thanks to dry. New Pandera's with clonge protection. Because I love my Granddad. You dirty old. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Gomez, yeah, Gomez, yeah, Gomez, yeah, Gomez, I'm gonna say what the record is. Gomez, get myself arrested. What, Steve? I have finally figured out what on earth you were waffling on about just a second ago. What? Pillsbury dough? Yeah, right? You just, Pillsbree dough?

Apparently, I'm talking to the listeners, Javedais like yourself. Apparently Pillsburybury Doe, right? It's an ad from years ago, advertising this form of dough. A little cartoon character comes on the tele, Pillsbury dough man, and he comes on and a woman presses his belly and he makes a noise or something? Yeah. That's what I say. Well you didn't say that at all. Why? You didn't explain it. See, I want to explain something, alright, Jemese, what I do is I think, what do I need to say, how can I best express it, which words shall I use and in what order? When you want to express something, you just go words, words, words, words, words, stop. Words, words, words, annoyed, words. Do you mean, it's just to be excited, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, annoyed, I.

Do you mean it's just talking to the kids? I was excited about remembering Pillsbury Doe. Yeah, but you must not let your excitement. I can believe you're so stupid and shouted not to have heard of him. You must not let your excitement, right, undermine your use of grammar. Do you understand me? She's not an excuse or motor. Sensibility. Anything, all right?

Think before you speak. I'm a DJ? Think. Where that, do. that, do. that, do. th. th. that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, th. th. th. that, that, you that, you that, you that, you that, you that, you th. I that, you that, you that, I that, I that. I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can that. I can that. I that. I I that. I that. I I that. I I I I th. I th. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. th. th. th. th. I can't th................................. I'm a DJ. Think before you speak. Where would I get if I did that? Um and and and so someone here says and starting off with hand. And? Never start a sentence with and because. Everybody knows that. Oh. Never start a sentence with and where we has. Mandy from Chingford wants to know if I I remember a program called Billy Liar. Of course I do, you see? And you probably don't. A program called Billy Liar? Yeah. Rubbish! That's never existed! No, there's a film and a play and a book. Happy birthday, Charlotte.

No, Catherine, it's from Charlotte. She's 20. Yeah, man. You're super slick on the mic. Puhh-Ich-Ike me the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. thoom. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. That's, th. That's, th. th. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. to. to-a. to-a. to-a. to-a. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. me another one. Because the thing is, if you stop drinking, you start going a bit mad. Can we get the margaritas in here, please, Nick? Oh, I had a margarita yesterday. Sitting outside a little restaurant in Camden, had a margarita. Oh, I went to a party. I was on the margaritas. I saw one of her, next day, actually. No. You can't th th th th th th th th thu thu thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I have that the the the the their. I had their. I had the mar. the margur. Can't the margaritas in. Can't. Can't. Can, I had the margaritas in the margaritas in the margaritas in the margaritas in the margaritas in the margaritas. I had the margaritas. I had the margaritas. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I than. I than. I the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the. Can't the What are we talking about before that though? Play a record, should we...

Drugstore, sober on XFM, 104. London's only alternative. Yeah. It's interesting that you say that, sentence every time we finish playing a record. I've learned, because it's the only thing that you've memorized, isn't it? Exactly, yeah. You can actually say that, that's that's thi thi thi thi only thi only thi only thi only thi only thi only thi only thi only thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, sooom, soooma, thi, thi, that's that's that's that's thoombering thoombering thoome thi, sooom, so tho, so thi, so thi, so thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. You take his eat breath. Yeah, taking another swig. You should see him preparing to come out of a record. Right. XFM. One of four point nine. And off you go. Yeah. Beautiful, Treveys. Yeah. Absolutely gorgeous. Walking along along the the other night towards your house on that route, that direct route from XFM, walking along. Zenline. Very short fella walking alongside me, right? And you know sometimes your eyes meet with these people.

I saw his face. What are you doing, crawling? How short are we talking? He's a short man. Four feet? Really? Yeah. Okay.

Carrying a big bag. Yeah. You know tho. their face has been stapled together. Yeah. He was one of those sort of people. Yeah. And so his face very odd. I mean, you know, I don't want to sort of, it's like a bit like the pot calling the kettle black. Yeah. You know what I mean? But he was short and ugly. You're tolu. He was a great. He was a weird. He was a weird. He was a weird. He looks up at me. He looks. He looks up at me. He looks up. He looks up. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He th. He. He. He's th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. He's a th. I. He's like. Can you believe that? Can I jump on your back? What was I going to say? He's ridiculous. Can I jump on your back? And I don't know what is it? Once you've got up there, I'm not sure where it's plan of action was going to be. I know what he was thinking. Fight a much taller man. Yeah. Anyway, he says that me. I mean, it's ridiculous. It's ridiculous. Like that was going to convince you. I know, fair sight.

Oh, no, I won't. Oh, go on, you're big. Oh, go on, then. Yeah, all right. That was lovely. That was lovely. As you ask so sweetly. Well, I'd have let her jump up. Yeah. Well, she might have needed to get somewhere quick, you know, like, you know, those kind of opportunities.

It would just be ungentlemanly. She might need it a ride. She might need it a ride. She might need it. Yeah. What, the classic House Martins. Classic House Martins. Well, it's, House Martins. Lovely. Steve made me do it.

Brilliant. Classic House Martins. Well, it's Happy Hour. Again? Uh, no, just called Happy Hour. Don't embarrass yourself, you swine. Why do you play that, then? That was your choice for today.

Go on. Well, I'll tell you why Iline. Well, you went out with a girl. Yeah. That you did. Yes. Yes. And that we played that song quite a lot. Really?

Don't mock, don't just, you know. But it was, she was, this is absolutely true, she was very odd. Of course she writes, you know, yes or no, like, her question to herself. You know, she had two nos in her hand, don't you? Her question might have been. Every night, she had two nose. Her question might have been, you know, should we get a new ta. the supermarket, yes, no, she might have thah. thah. thah. the. thi. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. She, the the the the the the. She, the the the. She would, the the the the the the the. the theat the. the. the. theat toooo no, we'll go to the market, she might have,

you know, shall I buy a new hat? Yeah, she might have, yes, no, choose a paper, no, and you know, she's just a bit odd, just a bit weird, and no, and that is exactly how it all finished. Really? Yeah, she did, she wrote, you know, she made the question she asked herself was, shall I carry on going out with the th and their th...... their th. th. th. their, th. th. their, th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, thi, to, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she's, she's, she's, thin, thin, t. She's, t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t th th th th th th th the way, this is absolutely true. The question she asked herself was, shall I carry on going out with Steve? Right. Piece of paper? Yes, no. No. That is true. I mean that's quite a tragic story. She had 30 goes. Best out of three she kept saying. Yeah. That is absolutely true. That is true. I mean that really is quite tragic. It makes me a love that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. the the the the the the the the thrue. the the the the. I the. I the. the. I the. the. the. th.ic. Do you think so? Yeah. It makes me quite, it makes me a love, martyr, don't you think? Yeah. Wouldn't you say? It was so much, right, because you can put it down to like fate and luck now, as opposed to, you know. Yeah, it was the gods. It wasn't your fault. No. You're listening, this was your tune, this is the Del Garnon's. Everything goes around. With the news that I want, but I really, really, really, wow.

With the news that Jerry Halliwell has left the Spice Girls, XFM has set up a helpline for distressed fans. If you need a shoulder to cry on, call Ricky Jervais on 0171580 2000. Hello. Of course it's very, very sad and maybe the Spice Girls as they were don't exist anymore. But I mean, her work will go on, the good she's done for charity like the mine victim charities and you know all that caring that she didn't and our thoughts shouldn't just be with her it should be with you know William and Harry now. Rick I see you got a bit confused. The XFN Ginger Helpline Ono171580 2000 Yeah

Just think it with me Come Baby birds bad old man yeah Nx FM 1 and 4.9 nearly half five Ad break scope song for body Bobby competition film quiz Sheet album album Bobby, Bobby, competition, film quiz, um, Shed 7 album, um, Midget album, um, XFM album with China's Rome Garby's left field. Am I making sense?

No. Play a record. That's all Bobby. That's all Bobby. That's all Bobby. Scope. Just gone on our five, Steve, his competition time. Jvays, you're absolutely right. Competition time on XFM. We're gonna play you a clip from a classic movie. We want to know what is the film. Three CDs to give away to the lucky winner. Jovey's album from Midgett, tracks on there from the Bo Radley's, we got songs from Stereo Lab, Marion, all sorts. Javeys, play the clip. It's a classic movie, but what is it?

After I've told you that I nicked those CDs from your original. Oh, I don't believe you. Yeah, I know he wouldn't mind. We're not giving them away. No, not. It's the clip. What was that? T-1000, Metic Poly alloy, Liquid Metal, cannot form complicated metal objects, just dabbing weapons. Could he make a corkscrew? No problem, but he has to make things of a similar volume.

Could he make scissors? Do they have to work? Yeah? No, then. Just dabbing things. A pin? Again with the volume thing. could make a pin. It had to be a fucking big pin. A sword? Yes, obviously. Some roller skates.

Impossible, the moving parts. A ball and chain. I thought you had the concept. Fishing rod? You're winding me up now. A chess set, but all in one piece, sort of a sculpture. What would be the fucking point? If it was metal, he could hit you with a feather duster and he could still kill you. He's a T1,000, the fucking Terminator, not Ken Dodd.

Ooh. That's it, I'm leaving. Say, I'll be back. No, I'm going. What about my little boy? Factor. FI-A-O-Boh. So, classic movie action there. it from? It's a blockbuster and a cult film. Simple. What film was that? 0171, 580, 2000.

Gervais, I've got to say, go on. I'm very impressed that the work you've been doing. You've obviously put a lot of effort into that, you know, that little quiz there. I'm most impressed, what can I say? Good. You know, but I'm a little bit worried. It seems to be to the worrived. Go worried. Go worried. Go worried. Go worried. Go worried. Go worried. Go worried. It seems to to to to to that. Go worried. Go around swearing and then just sort of bleeping out the swear words, do you know what I mean? It just seems a bit juvenile? Well it's juvenile, yeah. I mean that's the point is dear, it's juvenile and silly and it's not between clever but it is fucking funny. What? What did you say that? It's I'm just saying it, it is, you're right, you know, it is sort of juvenile and childish to be as well, but it's, it's funny, isn't it? And that's the important

thing. How did you, how did you do that? Is that some wind-up? Do what? Do what? You're swearing? Yeah? And it's, and it's being bleeped to. Of course it is, it's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's radio. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's th. It's th. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's funny. It's funny. It's. It's funny. It's funny. It's th. It's funny. It's funny. It's funny. It's th. It's funny. It's funny. It's th. It's funny. It's funny. It's th. It's funny. It's funny. It's funny. It's th. It's funny. It's funny. It's th. It's th. It's funny. It's know. I don't know. Is it a wind-up? Is it some... Well, I don't know. This is live, Javeh. Yeah, of course it's fucking live. XFM, 104.9, London's only fucking alternative. What can I swear? If I swear, will it do the same? I don't know. It's your neck. It's your neck. It's your hairy-a-. Um, who? Big hairy dogs cock. Steve, be careful man. What? You can't go around saying big hairy dogs c-fix. If you swear again, Steve, um,

um, I'm serious, I'll be annoyed because he'll make me look like a wh-a- This is Radiohead and Blackstar. this is Radiohead, Blackstone. How are you doing this? I don't know. Radiohead, you're a Black Star, on XFM, 104. 9.9. It's the Ricky Givay show. We've had a competition. Does the bleeping happen in the pub? Of course it doesn't. What? You can say what you want live, can't you, in a pub? I'm just a bit confused. I know. the competition winner. There's a competition winner. Dinesh to to to to their their toee. their tha tha tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th............................................................... winner, it'll be pleased to know. Dinesh de Silva from Wimbledon has won those three CDs and can I just say they're already winging their way to him as we speak. Yeah.

I can say that, absolute numbers. They're probably outside on the table. You've lost a bit of paper and that and that. That excuse the thanks, the thanks, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, they, they, they, they, they, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're they're they're they're they're, they're, they're, they're, and, and, and, and, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, thr.... And, thr. And, they're, thr. And, they're, they're, they're, they're, they. And, they're they. they're they. they're already. they're already already. they're already. they're already they're already been great. We've enjoyed ourselves. What was the film clip then? Oh, the film, of course. We didn't even give it away. It was Terminator 2. Of course it was. The classic scene when the T-1,000 puts the big sword to the lift and Linda Hammond

goes, what was that? Arne explains? It's a fantastic. I've got another one, yeah. Gervais, and I must say the film quiz thing, I think it's very popular at the moment, a lot of people are very excited by that. We've got an ad break coming up, and then the classic from placebo, yeah? Placibo? I'd rather have one from pulp. We'll play both. Brilliant. Do you remember Molem would go out with me? I mean, would she be obliged to? Is that how it worked? You could be her bow mollum. Well, true enough. Those

will be the headlines. XFM's Steve is Bow Mowlum. Not Beauty in the Beast. Well, I know. Don't start slagging her off. Or Labor M.P. attacked by strange freak. Don't start slagging her off. Easy Metal is the new album by Tony Butterbing. Oh the animals went in two by two I'm gonna fuck you like we're in the zoo. We're gonna fuck like a rhino. We're gonna fuck like a big fat rhino. And who can forget earplugs are gay. Earplugs are gay. Hear what I say now. Those earplugs are gay. So get them out.

The goddamn way now. I feel the need to make my brain needs noise and speed. Mother-fucker and featuring Tony's brand new single blood sweat and come Easy Metal, the new album by Tony Botherbein, Out Now. This album is not available anywhere. The FIST5 is now The Fisty 5 and Now the Fisty 4. Jerry Hallowell has left the Spice Girls. The announcement was given by her solicitor in London.

The band members say the Fifty Four. Jerry Hallowell has left the Spice Girls. The announcement was given by her solicitor in London. Now the band members say they'll go on without her. But the son's showbiz correspondent, David Wig, says it won't work. You're going to have Victoria next year wanting to get married to David Beckham, and she probably want to have a baby. So gradually we'll see them fall away. This is the demise of the Spy Scills, definitely, because Jerry was so popular, she was the one the most popular members, and she was the leader. It's just gone six o'clock, but they're still here, aren't you boys?

Oh yes. Yeah, just say Cheerio, don't it. I left you at that, cannicki? Yeah, it's generous. You left the sink down too low as well. when I had to raise it up again? And you've got one, two, three, four, five cups in here. And two empty ash trace, and you don't, don't leave your crown behind you. You did that last week. You konger, you're starting already. Oh, you're starting. Well, it's a two-hour bleep. Yeah, just a big two-hour brief. I just got to say, Happy birthday, Catherine. And sorry, Holly, I didn't read your fax, but our fax machine chewed up after it's sent it again. Didn't hear a word of that. No. Lorry, play a song. All right then.