The Ricky Gervais Show / An Idiot Abroad - Xfm S1E5 (December 8, 2001)

Episode Date: September 2, 2022

The show ran between September 2001 and May 2002 before Gervais and Merchant went on hiatus to film the second series of ‘’The Office’’. Initially, Pilkington’s on-air presence was relativ...ely minimal compared to what it would become. Gervais and Merchant only occasionally called for Karl to weigh in with his thoughts, while the two mostly talked to each other, with the “links” between songs comprising only about 30 minutes of the show’s 2-hour run time.As Pilkington’s personality moved to the forefront, the talk portion of the show expanded to roughly an hour per 2-hour broadcast. While the show relied largely upon a stream-of-consciousness format, Pilkington made attempts to keep things more conventional by insisting on running contests and airing pre-recorded segments and regular “features”.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 There's a star on XFM 104.9, 5 past 1. That means it must be well in. Five minutes into the Ricki Gervais Show. With Steve Merchant. Yeah, he's here as well. Well, we've got some great tunes lined up. We've got Emen, we've got some great. We've got Eminem, we've got some tune-up. We've got to, we've got to Claced, we've got some classic radio. I mean you've said that it's names group but the chances of us actually playing all of those are quite slim. We might not get to him if we talk too much. And obviously we'll look obviously drop to some of those to play our own tracks as well. Yeah well they are own it's quite hardcore what's going on about, you know, subject matter that is adult, really. Certainly. And it's quite aggressive and it's cool and I think it's quite aggressive and it's
Starting point is 00:00:57 a nice little tune. It could be like a little cartoon figure, here comes Flumpy McMum. But, I mean, it's like, it's like a little scea, I thu, it's a little, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, it's, it's, the, the, thin, the, the, the, th, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they. And, they. And, th. It's, thin, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha'''a, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, MacMum. Yeah, yeah. Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do? But the only is there is, isn't there like a video you can get now, which is a cartoon Slim Shady? The adventures of Slim Shady. Really? The adventures of the adventures, the cartoon animated series, which sadly never got to see. And new kids on the kind of religious music scene. Does he? Yeah, he's gone sort of famous. Wasn't he always a preacher or something or a society in gospel or something? Yeah, I think so. Because he used to, yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:29 I don't know, I mean, I just assumed he was quite, he's quite off the streets. He used to keep a lot of bribes in his big trousers. Yeah. So he's thi heed heed heed heed heed heed heed heed heed hea hea hea hea hea he's he's he's he's he's he's he's th th th he's always th th he's always he's always he's he's he's he's always to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thr. thr. thr. thr. the thr-hea. thr-hea. the threat. the thr-hea. thr-hea. threat. tho. tho. hea. hea. hea my classic film review. Always looking forward to it. It's already getting a little bit of attention. From who? Wow, just various people. Go on, name so. Well, I can't name them, what by name or just... Yeah. Oh God, what's that one? Oh, Scoreszzy? Right. You want to be a little bit of one of his? Yeah, Mo? No. No. No. Spilberg. Spilberg. Right. We've it it it it's. Score's. Oh. Oh. Oh. Score's. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. It's. Scor. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. It's. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Scor. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, it's. Oh, it's. Oh, it's. Oh, it's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. From. From. From. From. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. From. From th. From th. From th. From th. From the. From the. Who's the. From the. From the. From the. From the. From the. From the. From the. Okay, good. You're going to talk about one of his today? No, no. Spilberg. Right.
Starting point is 00:02:08 We're going to do a Spielberg film. We've got, that film sounds good. And that's not my film with you. That's where I take a track off a soundtrack of a classic film. Yes. And it's the film review. Maybe what do that? No, no, no, no, that's why I wouldn't want. We've got a song for the lovers, we've got a song for the ladies.
Starting point is 00:02:30 Yeah, I'm gonna be playing a hip-hop track. It's called the, it listening like, you know, Sarchin, Sarty or McCann-Ex and all, you know, those people that do advertising, then we are the people. We're the people, we can market. We can market anything. Maybe you're a two-bit band, you want to email in or something, you know, and just say, how can we publicize our music? Yeah, we the excellent. I like it, it's always the same reviews. It's sort of like, um, they go, um, the excellent single by Coldplay, yellow, yellow,
Starting point is 00:03:13 that's yellow by collid play. Why do they do the bit that says yellow? We head it. Just to show, I want to see some else in the song maybe, maybe the mid-late. Yeah, it always be the brand new excellent album from Travis featuring the hit single sing sing sing sing sing sing sing that's all the stuff we lined up we were probably gonna I don't know probably Probably wrap it on about other stuff yeah oh unless I'm very much mistaken we've got to to the tabet about other stuff yeah oh unless I'm very much mistaken we've got something to give away is that right the K man's with us of course pressing the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key key that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the the the the they. the the the the the the the th th th the the things they. they. they. they. the they. the the they. I's the the the the th is that right? The K-man's with us of course, pressing the button. K-man. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:47 Hylkinton. I'll just say there's nothing funny about that name. They're straight away, seriously. Just clear that up, straight away. You know, I can't hear the people are laughing. So in school, they'd go through a more camfield, Sturgis, Sturgis. Well no, we wouldn't go to Sturgis yet would it? Oh she wouldn't be there, would she? Well no, peas before S, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:04:09 She just wouldn't be at school. It's busy in rehab. Pilkington. Pilkington. Pilkington. Pilchintin. Yeah. Pilgton. Pilkington. Yeah. Sounds a bit like Plonker. Yeah, or Pilchard.
Starting point is 00:04:26 Yeah. So anyway, we've got the dropsych's tie. I don't think anyone's ever mocked the name before. I think we're the first ones to do it. Oh, we're brilliant. We are. I don't think people up there. It's a funny name. They're all right. It's an exotic name. Rams. R like. R like. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. R. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. they. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I Trentide. Ask a Piddle Trentide, what are you doing? You're late? And you're like Javace. Well, right. That's an exotic name. Is that a bit of trace. It's a bit. It pays your wages. Blight me. Here he comes. I want to go at the star of the show? Yeah. Do you want to play a record? thate. We've got a tickets the to get the tickets to get to get the tickets to get to get thea tickets to get thes thes thas tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. thia. thia. That's thia. thia. thi. thi. thi. thia. thia. thia. th. th. th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's a th. It's a th. It's a thi. It's a thi. It's a thi. It's a thi. It's a together. It's a ttax. It's a ttax. It's a ttax. It's a ttax. It's a thi. It's a thi. It's a thi. It's a thi. It's a thi. It's a thi. That's what I like about rock and art, you know, sings, tells the story about every day thing that you know about Genobi versus Dragon. Yeah, that would experience to Shinobi or the dragon ninja.
Starting point is 00:05:12 Yeah, was there any reference to but I wasn't really paying attention but I'm assuming that some of that screaming was about Shinobi and the dragon ninja. I don't know who won if anyone knows who won out of the shinoinoino shshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshh, that that that that that that that that that that that that th, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that th, th is th is th is th is their their their thrown, thrown, the thrown, then the second single there's the fight, like the mid-thing in the film. So I know about film structure because I do a film review. Yeah, sure, sure. And then the final one is, you know, the final one the final one is the other thin. The two the prophets, maybe. Are the lost prophets? English? Are they British? What's the deal? Who are the prophets? Pilks? Who's the pros?
Starting point is 00:05:47 Tilky? Um, yeah. Yeah, yeah. What was the answer? What was that? Are they're American? Do you have to say they're American? Do you have the deceivers. Katie, you were going to tell us, tortured, you were going to tell us
Starting point is 00:06:05 what... What tickets are in the way? But it worked for me see, because when I was younger, I had a mobile disco. Brilliant, so did I. And it was me, I mean, Colin, making, and the discos and the discos called Pilke's Making Music. Guess what brilliant. I mean, genuinely brilliant. Pilk is making music. Guess what, when I first started a mobile disco, this is when I was about 14, we just didn't really go, like, to me just would do it for like people's parties and stuff.
Starting point is 00:06:33 We were called the Rock and Roll D-Di D-Js, thr. We drew it on some sort of see their paper and put a th-a-up-up-up-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-in-in-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-in-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-so-s-s-s-s. My first disco I had two nights a week in this pub near Kings Cross right and It was just their records right and Every I had to play a this number of songs every time the same time wait so all the locals all drunk with dancing and everything one of them was American pie by Don McClane right and they just sing along all the words sort of drunk yeah yeah the other one was baby Jane by Rod Stewart if I didn't they didn't play thin th. if if I they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their they're their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they're they're their their they're they're they're their they're they're they're they and they just sing along all the words sort of drunk. Yeah yeah the other one was baby Jane by Rod Stewart if I didn't play that I'd get lynched and what was the other one there was another one that I always had to play? I was a it was a ballad I have to remember
Starting point is 00:07:16 that but yeah but Carl do you think you know much about DJ in for like you know the so the thirty the the the the the the the the the the the the th is is is is maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the 18th. Oh really? Okay let me just offer a little text for you then. All right the buffet's been served right people have done some speeches like it's a wedding do. Yeah. So you've already played some records early on you've stopped for food yeah yeah just played some light backing music in the background while the food's been served if it down to two or three yeah. Kylie. Depend, yeah. Yeah. Can I tell you what the definitive track is? Go on. Oh what a night. Thank you Vali in the four seasons. People don't realize what it is exactly. It's very ding ding ding. Bound down, down, I can't actually play it but uh.
Starting point is 00:08:18 Oh what a night. Late December back in 60th. That leads you straight into a seven-day medley and everyone's loving that. I'm thinking Beech's, there's going to probably be some kind of abatrack, dancing queen, the organist storm. I have, well you're turning your noses up. I can tell you this, we're telling you, I can tell you this, that we been up. The people with a decent bit of musical taste would be up. The first person to get up is a fat lady in a dress with bad ankles and a little kid who's got problems and he's in a little DJ. The problem with you two is you're not catering to the market. You're trying to be all sort of bohemian and kind of, you know, teach people Not at a mobile disco. Far too avant-garde. All right, click it in. Grease Mega Mix. Play, um, play a record.
Starting point is 00:09:06 Come on Eileen. Have you got Corman Eileen? What are you going to play? Love, Shack. Excellent, yellow. Well, you'd never say it. It's yellow. Oh, yellow.
Starting point is 00:09:14 Oh, yellow. That's the stunning back to 1999. What was it? 2000? Was it? Was it? Was it? Was it? I think when I was so many people were fans of the lost profits. Everyone's been phoning, emailing and interlioners they were from Cardiff? Yeah. Well, you're going to tell us what tickets you've got, Carl? What, to what have we got to give away? Tickets for? Now we kept the secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, we said, to to to to to to to to the secret, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the their, their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. thean, thean, their thean, their thean, thean, thean, thean, were thean, were their their their their surprise. This is going to be if it's going to be really rubbish is it? This is this whatever these tickets are right is a test to how much they rate us here XFM how much they rate our show and care about us. What tickets have we got to give away? A top show featuring Mickage Abase and Steve Merchant and Pilkington. What tickets are we got to give away? Tickets for Kfest. Right, go on.
Starting point is 00:10:05 What's that? It's like a rock thing that's going on site. You know, if you're into that Welsh. Right, well, names him of the band. Nile. Nile. Go on, right. That's one of the bigger ones. Hans. Mark Lanigan. Who?
Starting point is 00:10:26 Not Lanners? His Lanners are playing? He's not really? Yeah. Mark Lanigan really playing there? I think so. God, who is that? Who is that?
Starting point is 00:10:36 Who is Lanigan? Is he someone you went to school with? Who is Mark Lanigan? Who else is it? Who is he? Who is Mark Lanigan? Who else is he? Who is Mark Lanigan? Did he need a promoter? He's just in the pub in Camden? He got, you got Nile? We got the way to get to the cave fest? Hold on, let's have a look, I say, this is the enemy. Mark, Mark, Mark Lanigan, Masters of Reality. Right, okay. Who else? Weigan. Nile? Who else? I can't pronounce this one. Let's have a look. That's good, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:11:09 Bethlehem? Bethlehem? Behemoth. Behemoth? Behemoth, is it? Let me see. Go ahead. I expect it from a northerner, but not from a university educated man like you. Let me have a look. where are we there? I can't even find on the page. Here we are, yeah. Anyway. Behemoth. Yeah, Behemoth so confusing. But although I just thought something, we're not really giving those away, are we? Surely we're asking some sort of financial reward for them.
Starting point is 00:11:34 Right, okay, right. Is there a competition on the night? Now let's just say, South Carolina Death Yeah, I mean, some people. We've got, we've got a pair of tickets to give away? Yeah. Okay, if you want to go to Kfest, it's the mean fiddler, Chown Cross Road, and that's tonight, is it? Tickets would be 750, but we're getting away for free. Why don't we say we're giving away for a five? No. But I'll tell you what, if you can call, if to to to to to to to to to to the to the the their their their their their we're g to go, if their to go, if to go, if to go, if to go, if to go, if to go, to go, to go, to to go, if to go, to to to to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go, if to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go, if to go to go, if to go, if to go, if to go, if to go, to go, the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their their their, their, the the the the the the the th.. to the to the to the to Oh, oh, oh, seven hundred, eight hundred, one, two, three. Yeah, and the question is, because they're quite sort of, there's big names near, like Nileigham, what's his name? Lanigan's on. The question is, who wants to go? Yeah. So if you can call in and answer that question, who wants to go to go one of the lucky winners. Right. After this, some great chat and music. Could you also explain who Mark Lannigan is? Delisoul, watch out.
Starting point is 00:12:30 Well, we're wrong. The lines went mental tickets. It's amazing, isn't it? And they know all about them, where they were from, what they were like. And the t of players like it. It's probably the only real alternative out there now, isn't it? Because everything else is sort of mainstream, with no alternative music, even hip-hop. Yeah, even hip-hop.
Starting point is 00:12:52 Well, slip not. They're not kind of snuck in, haven't there? They, their man, it's incredible incredible. It's incredible. It's their their their their their thoomomomomomoboblion. It's. It's really really. It's really. It's really. It's really. It's their only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only their. It's their only only only only only only their only their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their. It's their, it, it's their, it's their only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only only their. It's their only their only their only their only their only only their only their only only only their their only only only their their their their their their their their their their their their can't remember. People who phone up about the heavy metal though, they always sound such nice people. Yeah. Women always sound attractive. You know if you meet him there, they're like eight foot tall in those huge boots. I don't matter that we've actually, we suddenly sound like two old, thanks. And you know what, I spoke to my birthday, you know it was my birthday a couple weeks back.
Starting point is 00:13:28 Yeah, and we were talking about the stuff that my dad had given me his presents in the past. And anyway, my sister told me that he listened to some of it and the car driving up and he was quite an absurd. Oh really? Yeah, but yeah, but it was all affection. It was done with affection. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was all. It was. It was. It was all. It was all. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was which were awful. I know. It's probably listening again. Well, possibly. I happened to me one. I remember telling their story on XFM. And I'll tell you the story, you've heard it, but I'll tell them about. I used to live in just a little one room, sort of bed, when my girlfriend sort of in that, it was sort of like eight as well. And it was just awful, it was one room and we had a bed and it's sort of like
Starting point is 00:14:09 the kitchen was the bedroom so I bet, literally... The kitchen was the bedroom? Yeah, it was the bed in there and then like a, it was just one room we had. It was all we could afford, yeah? And so we had to, yeah, and so, you know, you're sleeping in bed, your head was by the fridge and the sink was by your feet and you had to go out and down the stairs to a communal toy. So I obviously, I'm a man, I could just pop out a bed, on tiptoes, the sink was quite high, and have a little the way in the middle of the night. So, into the sink. Into the sink, yeah, so that was the the sink yeah so that was that was fine and sometimes I just go oh
Starting point is 00:14:46 these run the tap afterwards and I just remember once going at least take the dishes out because I used to sort of lift if it was just for dishes I used to lift them up and sort of like aim underneath it and then but it was it was quite hygienic it was you know but what you mean it was quite hygie well I was tired it was like I was tired I I was and like and like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like.. it. it the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the what you mean it was quite hygienic well I was tired I was tired and drunk and yeah and it was it was just a I was a horrible place and we had mice you you're you're quite a problem with urination after a lot well I worry about getting caught like on a tube I don't take tubes anymore I don't take tubes anymore well I listen my dad's advice is never you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you have you have you have you have you have you have you have you have you have you have you have you have you have a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their you have a the their you have a their you have a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th you have have you have you have you have you have you have you have you have a th th th th the are are are you have I have I have toy. I have toy. I have the are are you have the are you have the are you have have their you have a the the the the, like on a tube I have to, oh I don't take tubes anymore.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Well I listen to what my dad's advice is never pass the toilet and not use it because you never know when you might have to use it. Exactly my, yeah. You might not have anyone for a long time. Oh but anyways, what was it, theyme and so like no. He makes an awful lot up. He makes an awful lot up. Yeah, that's what we have to say. No, I was joking. I didn't mean it. So, you know, I think I got away with it. And although, your mom did watch me every time I went out to the kitchen.
Starting point is 00:15:57 You're like, yeah, I'm just going to call me sandwich no? If so, just I'll have it on the newspaper. I know. The toilets over there, okay. All right. Yeah. Oasis, don't look back and I go. A classic there. Absolutely. From the height of Brit.
Starting point is 00:16:14 I'm mad to think it's a classic now and I was there at the beginning. I know. I know, I can it's good getting here. It's, I'm not saying the urinations are bad thing. I wasn't damning the fact that you need to urinate, it was about you're doing it in the sink. With dishes you probably yeah. But you know, the thing is in them, you know, there are, there are some societies where if you urinate and some that you sort of, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it is is is is, it is is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is the the the the the that you is, is, is, is, it is that you that you th is know, enigmatic creatures aren't they? Mysterious creatures. I mean, so if I, you know, sometimes I, I mean, I own a lot of things through that. Right. Sinks, telephone boxes, you know, lots of fences.
Starting point is 00:16:55 My shoes. Your shoes once, yeah. And I was chasing you around robbing shoes once. Yeah. You're all right. right around jellyfish because apparently is this a band that's playing tonight it is a band isn't it actually it was I'm a playface yeah if you get stung by a jellyfish yeah we stops it hurting is that true it's just for anyone listening I mean I it's probably best to check that maybe on the internet
Starting point is 00:17:20 or phone a doctor before you try that I mean because Carl although Carla's got useful information it's not he's not a medically trained man. Yeah, because I got in trouble once coming out of the sea at Bogner running around, people going, we on me, please. Please, we on me. Just running around. Yeah. But, uh, have you ever wet the bed? Yeah. But uh, have you wet the bed. Never wet the bed. Never. Okay let's play a record then. Are you you wet the beck of you? Wow not. Not as such. We may as well tell us. Um, well yes then. Well, is there a story attached?
Starting point is 00:17:57 Uh, well I remember once right. Oh, is this when you were a child? Sort of. Hold. 26. Okay. And, uh... I remember once, right? Oh my God. Was this when you were a child? Sort of. Hold. Twenty-six. Okay. And, oh, God.
Starting point is 00:18:11 Oh, it's another story involving... Anyway, once. Once, just wanted a sink, have me? Oh, God. Come on, please. Well, once. I went to, uh, stay, to, to stay, went down to Brighton, with Jane for a party, a sister's party, and we're staying at parents, that's a parents with a way.
Starting point is 00:18:31 And first of all, I got too drunk. I didn't, I don't know, I don't know I'd known him very long. And I remember, it was a Fancy West, but I remember laying on the floor trying to trip people over because I was so drunk. Something that's hilarious if you're drunk. Yeah, imagine Jane going, oh that's my boyfriend, I'm so proud. It's all the family. And then we got a cab journey home, true, I didn't remember. And then finally the cabs were going, is he all right? Because I was going, yeah, I'd be sick. Then I'd be sick, I'd be sick, I'd be sick, I'd be sick, I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm that. I'm that. I'm that's all all all. That's that's that's that's all that's all that's all that's all that's all that's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. That's my. I'm that's my. I'm that's my. I'm that's my. I'm that's that's that's that's that's that's th. I'm th. I'm so th. I'm so th. I'm so th. I'm so th. I'm so th. I'm so th. I'm so that's th. that's my that's my that by your side by the arrhythmics and then I went to bed and apparently I
Starting point is 00:19:10 got up in the middle of night walked around the bed and just thought the bed was a toilet and Jane said I went what I'm fishing on me I went where I don't need to wake me up and then just got back to bedthe head. You urinated on the movie. Alright, let's, yeah. But a hip-hop. Oh man, a live. Hip-hop, h'r-hare! Hip-hop!
Starting point is 00:19:32 Oh, it's the opportunity where Ricky, Steve gets to play one of histhe hip-hop tart. This is from, I need to just introduce it briefly, it's from an artic's called Mad Skills, who on this record claims that he has written loads of other people's songs, which I think is true. The only thing I would say that. The only only only only only the the tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi thi thi thi thi thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks the. The only the. The only tho thinks I thinks I thinks I thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks that that thinks that that that that that thinks thinks thinks that thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks thinks that's thinks that's th lot of bleeping but if you can piece it together from it it will actually be quite a good song go on I'm gonna actually no don't you don't you don't know it by urinating on yeah put it away oh little dribble that is mine now that cost me over five point gorillas rock the house an ex f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f the to the too r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r r i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i itip i to k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k i to k i i i i to k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k k r r r r r r r r r r r rk i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i if i if i i i i i i i i i if i i i if i if if i if i i if if i if if i wish I had now to make me look like some sort of mad old urination you just can't handle your drink you can't handle your drink no I can I just I just get
Starting point is 00:20:35 rid of it in the usual way of excretion via the kidneys down the eretha out the end down the sink sometimes a sink sometimes a to toil at a toilet Carl Carl. Sometimes a bed or your girlfriend. You know it just I'm embarrassing things. I remember once right I used to love nature when I was like eight nine ten and I remember going out with my sister and my brother and their girlfriend and like to come to husband and wife wife. Yeah, you know, just keeping common new it you know. And I used to get shells and things on the beach and I used to get anything. I love nectar and I found this perfect snake skin, a grass snake runada.
Starting point is 00:21:21 And it was I absolutely, I couldn't believe my luck and I was going, and I was going, okay put it down because I realized they were a little bit scared of it.. I, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just they their just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, I they're a they're a they're a they're, they're, they're, just, they're, just, just, they're, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, my luck. And I was going, look, look, I was going, okay, put it down. Because I realized they were a little bit scared of it. They're going, put it down, it's dirty. And of course I'd torture him a little bit. And then I thought it was hilarious. And they made me leave it there and I told mom and then much later when I had when I had, I had, I had, I had, I had, I had, I had, I had, I had, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and I was, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, I was, I was, and, I was, and, and, to....... to. to. to. toed. toed, and, and, and, toed, and, and, to. to. to. to. to. th. th. to embrace the sister and I was going, yeah, and she was scared of it. And she went, well, it was a used Johnny. She'd waited that long to invite me front of my friends. I've been running around with a used jurorx thinking that this is great because they were scared of takes.
Starting point is 00:21:56 And they were going, put it down, it's dirty. No, be careful of it. It is horrible, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, is. It is. It's th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. yeah. That's horrible. It is horrible, isn't it? Have I gone too far again? How could you not really think it was made of rubber for goodness sake? Well, you obviously didn't know anything about nature. Oh, I used to love nature, me. Yeah, I haven't been between the skin, there's some skin and their skin and their skinned and their rubber and he was... Now be careful of it, it was a little, it, their, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it was a thin, it was a thin, it was a th. It was a thi, it was a thi, it was a thi, it, it, it, it, it, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was, it was th, it was th, it was th it was th it was a th it was a th, it was made, it was a th, it was a th. was a th. was a th. was a th. was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a thi, it was a thi, it was made thin, it was made thi, it was made thin, it was made thi, it was made thi was made thin, it was made thi was made thi was made thi, it was made thi, it was remembering this kid who lived near me once and this this bird got run over and he was she said I can save it and he kissed it because he thought he could give him the kiss of life. I thought you could give it the kiss a life. He thought he thought you could give it the kiss a life. He just
Starting point is 00:22:40 thought you could kiss something and that would bring back to life. I think it was an excuse I think it was a white white white white white white white white white white white white white white white white the the the kiss the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. I can't th. I can't th. I can can can can't can't th. I can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can't can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the kiss the the the the the the the the the kiss the the the the the kiss the the the the kiss of the kiss of the kiss of the kiss the kiss of the kiss the would bring it back to life. I think it was an excuse. I think he was thinking they were waiting for a bird to get run over and I can pretend to be giving it a nice little snog on my feet. I remember he kissed it like that and that threw it up like it was like it would fly away and it just went to be the worst bed in the world. I was struck off. Oh no, really really, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I the the the th and I'm th and I'm th and I'm th. I'm th. I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm th. But, I'm thin, I'm the the the thin, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, but, I, I, I, I, but, I, but, I, I, but, but, I, really, really, really, really, really, really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really. But, really. But, really. But, really. But, really. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm tho. Really. I'm tho. Really. I'm th tho. Really, I'm thin, I'm tho. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm Animal Hospital. No, I don't know what he's doing, but he's the worst vet in the world, but I struck off asleep with one of his patients. Oh, that's terrible. Oh, bless him.
Starting point is 00:23:12 Oh, no, I killed a fish once. Go on. Well, I made a little bow and arrow. I was about eight and nine. you know, I made a little, tha, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the worst, the, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, the worst, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was the worst, I was, I was, I was the worst, I was, I was, I was the, I was the, I was the, I was the, I was a the, I was a the, I was a thin, I was a thin, theat, threateat, threaten, threaten, theat, theat, theat, the worst, the worst, the worst, threaten, threaten, theat, I was a pond and there was a huge fish in it about, you know, eight inches long, a huge big sort of like golden off or something or a carp or so. And I was sort of playing and I aimed and I shot it and it went straight through it and float it to the top and I thought, oh my god. You pierced a fish with an amazing shot. Well it was luck, it was pure luck. You never got to... You know those little things outside in the front garden where the front gate, the little sort of four inches by four inches bit of amount, you lift it up and it's not like
Starting point is 00:23:52 where the drains are if the, you know, the plumbers need to get there or the counts or anything like that? Right, right. I dropped it down there and I thought, oh my god. I'm going to theymy, I'm, th. And I'm, th. And I'm, th. And I'm, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, thin, the, the, the, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, oh, they. And, so, they. And, so, so, they. So, so, like, so, like, like, so, like, they. So, sort of, sort of, so, sort of, sort of, sortilet and back, just taken out handfuls of VIM and pouring bleach down, thinking that I can get rid of this fish before the council dig it up in 10 years time and go, send him to jail. Fish aside. But who do you think, what do you think they would have done? They've taken the dead fish, is it a wea fish? Is going, is going, is going, is going, is going, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the fish, is a fish, is a fish, is a fish, is a their fish, is a their fish, is a to to thi, is going, is a fish, is a fish, is a fish, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the fish, and the fish, and the fish, the fish, the fish, the fish, the fish, the fish, the fish, the fish, is going, is going, is going, is going, is going, is a th...... Is, is a thi, is a thi, is a thi, is a thi, is a thi, is a thi, is a thi, is a that theat theat theat, theat, that, that, thi, thi, that, thi, that, thi,. You don't think it. You recognize the arrow or the fish? You mean, yes, it's arrow straight to it. But, um, you know, you don't think when you're eight that it'd be okay. If I, if I can't ride this out till I'm 20, the statute of limitations on goldfish,
Starting point is 00:24:36 yeah, you know, it's about, I can That was killer. Carl, anything embarrassing that ever happened to you ever? With what? With animals and should be animals. To be honest. So do why? It was a mistake. No, you know, I thought you were feeling bad about the fish. Yeah. Really, you were more worried about you being locked up in the today.
Starting point is 00:24:53 Well, I felt bad. There was both the law and the the moral thoes thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. th. th. th. th. I th. I to be. I to be. I to be the to be to be the moral the to be to be the to be to be the the to be to be thathe a to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi. I thiiia. I thia. I thia. I thia. I thia. I was. I thathea. I was. I was. I was. I was. I thooomoomorrow. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I hand with that. I used to sell mackerel. Did you? Had a pet magpie? Did I have a pet mackerel? Did you have a pet mack pie? Did it let me go? Did you keep it in a rabbit arch? It flew around but it used to just like come to me all the time but then it's like pecking my head and stuff. That's not a pet mouth bite like that's a bird in the garden? No no but I could actually I could hold it and stuff he wasn't scared of me and it knew it was me used to come down from like the top of it. It hated you that's why I wanted to pick you. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's a. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's not. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a. That's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's not. That's not. That's not a that's not a that's not a that's not a that's not a that's not a that's not a that's a that's a bad and I was chasing a butterfly and she said she said don't do that Carl and so why because they only live a day I said all right I'll get a dead one in the morning That's genius that's great that's quick thinking it
Starting point is 00:26:03 oh oh that's quick thinking, isn't it? Oh, that's sweet. Let's play something. Woo-Tang Clan and Gravel Pit, we love that, don't we? I love it, yeah. Brilliantly, great. We're doing like embarrassing stories and stuff. And I don't know if I've told this radio before, I've told you, Kyle. But this BBC cli and I've never told that if there's anyone listening who works for BBC I don't know
Starting point is 00:26:26 if I can still get in trouble for it but this BBC hire car and it was like I've been ferrying, I've been ferrying kind of actors and people and I've been ferrying kind of actors and I've been, to get some petrol and I was there and this bloke, two-in actors, the actors and the actors and the actors and I've the actors and I've the actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors actors and I their actors actors, I've there and this blokes came in in a white van right they took pulled into the and the fork and I was filling out the car and they went he do you want to buy a couple of speakers and I said yes I do yeah because I tell you the reason it was like I was so flattered that they thought I'd be the kind of bloke who would A need some kind of classic speakers and B, would like to buy them on the slide. I thought, yeah, they like the... They see me, they've seen I look a bit of a hustler. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm a street sort of guy, you can see by the way I use my walk. Yeah, so I could believe my luck.
Starting point is 00:27:13 So they drove behind the garage, the little sort of garage bit the back, and I went, yeah, open the back, he had two speakers in there, right? I said, are you sure these aren't knocked off, mate? He went, no, no, we work for Dixon's, this is a story he's funny, we work for Dixon's, right? And we're a delivery man, and if we make a delivery and the person's not there to sign for the goods, then we have to bring them back to the warehouse, but the warehouse, but the warehouse, but the warehouse, the warehouse, the warehouse, the, the, the, we, we, love that. And instead of thinking, are you sure some kind of troubleshooter didn't, I mean, did someone go into Dixon's and go, yeah, you're not, you're not getting in the garage? So I'll be going. Exactly. Get a couple of lads in a white van. Exactly. So anyway, so I sort of bought this story and I said I'm a bit worried these are knocked off. He went no, listen we've got a bloke at Dixon's
Starting point is 00:28:07 who can confirm this is fine, right? Phone him up, use my mobile, right, and quote this reference number, right? So I'll phone out, I'll find out, d'hue, d'u-doh. And I said, thrown, yeah, I go, thi's some some some some some some some some, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, the guy, we we've the guy, we've the guy, we've the guy, we've, we've, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've. We've. We've. We've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've. We've got, we've got, we've. We've. We've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, the guy, we've got, we've? And X, 1, 4, and I'm like, yeah, fine. Yeah. Okay. Well, that was, don't you? That was actually, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm thinking, well, you know, they sound great. They're giving me to a, for a knock down price. I said they were like 400 quid, they were like, and I was in, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, tha, I, tha, tha, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, th. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. th. tha. tha. tha. that was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, that, was, th. thoned Dixon. Exactly. I phoned Dixon back, that's fine.
Starting point is 00:28:45 So while they're loading them in the back of the BBC hire car, right, I'm in the paying for the petrol, right, and the guy's serving goes, he goes, oh you're doing around the back with those bloke, right? Because obviously there's a security camera, right, and he goes, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he's, and he's, and he's, and he's, and he's, and he's, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, I. their. their. their. their.. their.. their.... their, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I................................ th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. the. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. they. the. they. they. they. there's some old mates, some of my mates which are in a chat and that. He went right, okay, like giving me obviously the evil eye. So I went back the back and so I'm in the car now and I'm driving with, and I'm driving, and I'm driving with one and I'm driving with the the bloke who's driving with, and I'm, I'm, the other guy's driving, like, that, and I's like, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and I'm giving, like, like, I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, and I'm, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm giving, I'm, like, like, like, like, I'm, I tell my girlfriend's a DJ, she's got some of these speakers, they're fantastic, da da da, and he's giving me this, and then my mind starts working, now that I've got a bit of time to think, I'm thinking, wait a minute, this all sounds a bit dodgy, this all sounds a bit dodgy, it dawned on me, it hundred pounds on fine the lady. He said that with the bloatkins you but it seemed like a fair game. Some of his friends were winning. So I explained to I said how I can't get them back to like Brixton where I was living at the time.
Starting point is 00:29:51 He went don't worry give us an extra 20 quid we'll take them home for you. Oh that's good to deliver it. They do a whole service seat and there's also also also also also also also also they's also they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they're they're they're their. they're their. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their. I their. I'll they're to their. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'll. I'll. I'll. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I's. I's all. I's all. I's all. I's all. I's all. I'm their. I'm their. I'm th. So. I'm th. I'm so. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th so I said I'm not sure about that he went why don't you put him in a cab send them back and your housemates can collect it I was I'll know no it's a no one in and I was getting and I was beginning to sort of the try to be a conscious of like maybe a scam after the they scant so I'm thrown I'm gonna to the the the pull pull pull pull pull pull pull pull pull pull pull pull so so so so he so he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he so he he so he to to to he he so he he to to to to to to to to he so he he so he he so he he so he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he to to to to to t toy he was was toy he was he was toy he was to toy to to to to to to tso to to to to much, I don't think I want to. He went, 150 quid, 150, mate, 150, I went, no, he's under quid, 100 quid, no, 100 quid now to you, I'm thinking, wait, but this doesn't sound like kind of work that Dixon's, I'm thinking, but this doesn't sound, like, thrown, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this doesn't, can you get him out? I'm not interested and he went, 100, 100 quib mate. And he was just going to Utah, you obviously want some speakers, do you obviously want some speakers? You obviously want some speakers, do you obviously want some speakers? Do you obviously want some speakers to do them?
Starting point is 00:30:50 So I was carrying the speakers out and putting them back in the white you toss off as you leave the shop and walk down Camden Ice Street. They're not usually shouting to the monthly payments they were on at the moment. So eventually I put him in there and I sort of knocked the deal on the head and I got back in my car and they were in theirs and I just looked at the river and they were just punching the dashboard like we let that deal stick for our fingers and I've never been so terrified in my life I just sat there I was just thinking oh my god all I was thinking now is what if I go back to the BBC and they go we've had a call from the police the man at the garage he saw you doing the dodgy deal I love it well what you do is you put the kaikar in a drain in your front then going in and out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the lovers.
Starting point is 00:31:47 I love the song there, song for the lovers, Neil Young, man needs are made off a harvest album. What a beautiful song that is, beautiful strings and everything. Well you've got a song for the ladies coming up. Song for the ladies later on. That's that has set, you know the standard there. Well absolutely, yeah. Yeah. Were you going to do a film review as well later? We've still got that. Well, I could do a film review now, because it's quite a big. I thought you needed to prepare, but I mean, it's quite a big film and I've seen.
Starting point is 00:32:12 It's a great, it's a great film. So I have I can do it justice because it's a very. It's going to be Shindler's List. Okay, and are you going to do a jingle from us? Rookie's film review. Okay. This is a film by Stephen Spilberg. And because it's in olden times, it's all black and white and that, except a coat that's red. I don't know what happened there.
Starting point is 00:32:39 Anyway, it's about a bloke who's called Shindler. And because there were so many people we wanted to save he had to make a list to get organized and he tried to save as money as he could and you know he made them sort of not make the bullets properly on purpose could you know and in the end they gave him a ring it's the same bloke in May DT. Okay, your review of Shinders List. And as ever, mark out of 10 please. Nine, it was brilliant. You really enjoyed it? Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:33:17 Did the fact that it was three hours long bother you? No? No. Quite like that. Okay. What's some of it on pass forward? Okay. Um, Carl have you you seen Shund's list? No, I'm surprised and I managed to get all that in three hours. Amazing isn't it? Would that encourage you to see the hill? Definitely. Yeah. Okay, What would you give it a market? I'm sorry? You give it nine as well? Okay, I'll say I... It's just like a red co-a-I- I'm a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a their their the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their I'm surprised. I'm surprised. I'm surprised. I'm surprised. I'm surprised. I'm their their their their their their th. I'm th. I'm surprised. I'm not, I'm surprised. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm surprised. I'm not th. I'm surprised. I'm surprised. I'm surprised. I'm surprised. I'm just just surprised. I'm just that's th. I'm just just th. I'm just just th. I'm just th. I'm just just th. Yeah, yeah. Well that was just a little mistake apparently. I apparently yeah probably just couldn't get all the color out of it. As I said before if you've got a film that you'd like to have reviewed by Ricky Javis and email us Ricky dot Javis at XFM. dot co. I'm sure he can. Or even the other not just like the people but theyreve. the people but what about the the people. Not just. Not just. Not just. Not just. Not just. Not. Not. Not. Not. Not. Not. Not. Not. the people. the people. the people. they. they. they. they they they're they're they're their. they. they. they they they. they they they're just. they're just. they. they've they. they. their. their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I they they they they they they they they they're just. I I I I they're just. I I I I they're just. I I I they're just. I they're just. I. I they're just. I's. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. th. th. th. th. I've just. th. th. th. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I've. the ones who make the films like you know the ones that actually make the film what are they called Hollywood yes if they want me to do one for they're coming out to start giving it a little bit of a boost it's still
Starting point is 00:34:07 we give away the tickets that was selling yeah so you know we can we can sell your product and we make it look like it's all editorial but really if they look with money involved they could just tell you what was coming up and they if they said this, give us a good review and there's 20 quid. If they go, oh, no, there's no money in it, I'll probably give it a bad review. I'll probably give it a bad review. Rick, can I just about wizards and that and there's people in caves called Gonads with Beards, probably Robbie Coltrane's in it, because he's in the other one at the moment,
Starting point is 00:34:53 and it's all swords and stuff and there's some magic, but it is actually the lord of the ring, and it's actually the lord of it and he's, he's excellent in it. and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, and it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all the the the the the the the the the their, and their, and their, and there, and there, and there, and there, and there, and there, and there, and there, and there, it, and there, it's all, it's all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, is all, it's all, it's all all all all all, it's all so, it's all so, it's all so, it's all so, it's all so, it's all all so, it's all so, it's all the the the the the the the the the the the the their their the Lord of the Rings, not just like, you know, just one of them, he's the Lord of it, and he's excellent in it. So, alright, Mike, I think? Nine. Again, very popular film for you. Carl? Less convinced by that one, maybe. That doesn't sound as good as the other one. Yeah, what, what, what?
Starting point is 00:35:15 What you're going to give it nine? We split the money. Okay. Excellent. This is the Eels. Sorry that that was a mistake. I know the shit that was. It was too late to get it out of the CD players, Muse and Feeling Good. What do you think about that? I'm not a fan of Muse, but I wasn't quite as venous in my Hague. Don't we won't play that game. No, no, let's let's let's let's let's let's let's let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, the s, the s, the s, the s, the s, the s, the s, the s, the s, the s.. the s. the s, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the the the the the the the, the the the the the, the the, the, the, the, th. It's, th. th. It's that, threat. threat. th Muse. It was a mistake. Yeah. But it's not that bad.
Starting point is 00:35:46 Well, no, it's not as bad as Ricky. He said, I admit it's not as bad as that, but I'm standing out of it. Because I'm not fan of Muse, I wouldn't play Muse generally. Well, I don't mind Muse, generally,M. I know but Muse fits in I mean you're saying you want to play Radiohead? You sound like Radiohead? Why do we play Radiohead then? That's what I was saying. We're playing Radiohead but Muse is like Radiohead there's not a big difference. There is a big difference. There is a big difference. What's the difference? What's the difference? What's the difference? What's the difference between muse mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus mus the music? What is the music? What is the music? What is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. M. M. M. M. M. M. M. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. thean. th. the. the. the. the. their their their their their the's the difference? Well there you are, they are, I'll just have a competition. Let's see if people can tell the difference between Mus and Radiohead. Give the number out. Can't be bothered. What can I? So it's left
Starting point is 00:36:33 to me to keep the thing afloat. Yeah. That's never a good news. I went to see the white stripes this week. Anyone interested in that? the the the the the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thripe. th. the the the the the the the the thi. the the the the the difference. the difference. the the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the difference. the the the the the th. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. th. the t. tipe. People. tipe. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. tipe. People. People. We'. I's. It's. I's. So. It's. I's. I's. It's. I that? Go on Steve. White Strope's absolutely amazing. I've heard all the hype, you know, I'm not listening to the album, I went along to the gig, got a free ticket. I wasn't even a pound off, it was free, 10 pounds. I could have sold it outside the game, I didn't, I went in, right? Couldn't take along their mate, X-FN wouldn't let me. I went on their on their on their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I've all. I've all all. I've all all all. I've all all. I've all all. I've got told. I've got to get all. I've got to go. I went, I went all. I went their. I went, I went, I went, I went to go. I went to go. I went to go. I went to go. I went to go. I wasn't got a to go. I wasn't got a to go. I wasn't got a to get to get. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was a to go. I was a to go. I was a to go. I went a to go. I went a to go. I went a to go. I went a to get a to get a to to to to to get a tode. I went a to go. I went a to go. I went a to go. I went a to get a tode. I have to say this now, for they were the best band I'd seen who are like I didn't know it much about or whatever, like a new band, they were the best band I'd seen live since I saw a little band, you might have heard off called Oasis for five pounds at Coventry Polly. Yeah, well yeah, long name for a band. And it was amazing and they're brilliant and they're brilliant because because it's just a two of the g obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously obviously the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the girl the g grown on the grown on the grown on the grown on the grown the grown the grown the grown the grown their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th the. thrown, thr-s I I thr-s, I've thr-s, I throwne I've the I've the. thro. the. the. I've they're the mean I know all about the music and that the terminology yeah he was amazing yeah sometimes he plays like kind of steel with a still pedal thing on his not still pedal the finger thing the kind of symbol that some guitarists wear I believe it's called I believe some guitar thi.
Starting point is 00:37:34 I believe it is the name for it I believe it plays that like old bluesman some bluesman sometimes he's got like like like like like like like like like like like like like like old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old old he's got like an electric keyboard thing or piano as I believe some people call it. So this is in the review this is listing the instrument. All right, all right, there's not many to get through it. There's some drums and guitar. What kind of microphones were I'm glad you were? Well I'm glad you were. Well I'm glad you're. Well I the same. With the few simple instruments they had got a few. to the thrown. to go. to. to. to. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I. I. their. their. I. I. I. I was. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm.. I'm.............................................. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. It was amazing. I have to say I was a huge fan. And so I thought we could play a bit of white stripes, you know, to commemorate that excellent gig. I saw a band once, right? There was a drummer, and all the drums, people at the bottom, two the dittalums once, symbols. They were all miked up with with different microphones, coming down the loudspeaks. I was back. It was back. It was still. It was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, it was still, it was still, it was still, I was still, I was still, I was still, it was a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the drummer, right, I, I was a, I was a drummer, I was a, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a the drummer, I was a the the the the the the the the the the, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, I was a drummer, was a drummer, was a drummer, was, was, was, was, was a drummer, was, was, was a drummer, was, was, was a drummer, was a drummer, was a your film review? No, no good, yeah. Well you just did. I'm about as well-informed about music as you are about film. Anyway, how do you choose the playlist? Feeder, just the day. Now, because we're running out of time, because that muse shit we had to play.
Starting point is 00:38:42 I think I say, that's my feature, that PlayStation game sounds good. Right. Because that's the main music of the PlayStation 2 game Grand Tourism. Right. So I can incorporate that. Brilliant. Yeah, and I've still got to get in song for the ladies.
Starting point is 00:39:01 Yes. Got any else lined up? I've never seen you spiral in such despair after hearing news. I mean, fair enough, is that they're not great about it. Well, obviously we have to, you know, there's a bit of a playlist we have to keep to, and we've got to keep the records. Yeah, and we play, right, right, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I, and I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. Well, I. I. Well, I. I, I, I. I, I. I. I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, well, well, well, the. It's, th. It's, the. th. th. the. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the play this I don't know how they're chosen any but you know there's one thing I didn't want to play it's feeling good and it was already lined up and there was no time so I was genuinely annoyed because I don't mind like playing stuff
Starting point is 00:39:30 I wouldn't actually choose myself it's all right but you know it they're not completely free played all the time so the worst things so the worst thing is I don't the the the th I th I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the worst the worst the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the their the the the the the the the the the the the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst the worst th I don't I don't th is I don't things I don't things I don't things I don't things I don't things I don't th was the I don't the I don't the I don't the the the the the I don't thin I don't want to ever play Kashin again. I'm thinking they're putting a ban on guerrillas. Anything you like the band? Basement Jacks. Where's your head out? We already dropped that. We dropped that on purpose, didn't we? What else will we drop today? That's what else do we've dropped today?
Starting point is 00:39:53 That's what I mean? I'm willing things I hate, pay me. You know what I mean? I'm willing to take bribes. Look, I've been sent some chocolates here by the lads out of, um, uh, Carter USM, right? Are they still going? Yeah, they got a gig, who's a daddy now, tour, right? They're playing the Astoria, December, December. Oh, God, it's worth. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I's th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I. I. I. I. I've th. I. I. I. I. I've th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I've. I've. I've. I've the. I've th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. I've the. I've invite it but they've sent me chocolate so there's a you know there's a plug you know bribe me not XFM alright let's get some out of this Steve okay alright yeah I'm not sure I don't sure even I'd like to think it's a
Starting point is 00:40:33 Christmas father Christmas with some jellybeams that's from who's that from the that's from the that's from the dad's well the it's who's the daddy now tore and I i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm to c c c c. i'm to to to have to go. to to the to to to say. to go. to to go. to to to to to to to to to their is is is is is. so so. is. is. is. is. I. I. is......................... I.... I.. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the from the that's from the that's who's the daddy now tour and I've got some chocolate money right lovely yeah some of the friend got anything there from the senseless things or the wonder stuff no but you know we don't know they're doing now yeah the car was all right at the time yeah carter car was the right carter not really like Carter? Not really? No, it's nonsense. Well, I didn't like him singing about dagging him all the time. What was it? New Cross? Yeah. But you know, it's funny. It's good. Anything else do you also want to get off your chest? Uh, let's play some songs we like? What are you got lined up? I've got the song for ladies? Oh, love? Oh, look the song's? Oh, look. Oh, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. New, th. New, th. New, th. th. New, th. New, th. New, th. New th. New th. New th. New th. New th. New look. You like this one here, Ricky. What? Oh, Radiohead. Just. Brilliant. Is this news?
Starting point is 00:41:29 Radiohead and Just off the bends. No, that's a track. It's been a roller coaterter ride of emotions this show. Yeah, I started off with some light-hearted anecdotes about you and animals. Yeah, it ended up with you sort of spioling, sort sort sort sort spiring their spiring their spiring th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, just, thus, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. thea. threa. Radio, tho. Radio, tho. Radio, tho. Radio, thea. Radio, thea. Radio, thea. Radio a track by Muse can do to a man. Yeah, well clearly. You know, did I ever react? But then maybe, well I mean maybe that's what makes them good. I mean if music can, you know, create those kind of passions in someone, maybe that's effective. We've made me think again I love Muse. It's sort of it's a punk approach I suppose. Yeah. Anyway, Carl, thanks as ever th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to me. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the the the that's, did. It's, did. It's the that's that's that's that's that's that's that's, did I've. Did I've. Did I've. Did I've. Did I've. Did I've. Did I've. It's, did I've. Did I've. Did I've. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. It's. Did. Did. Did. Did, did. Did, did. Did I. Did I'm. Did I'm. Did I'm. Did, did. Did, did. Did I'm. Did, did I'm. Did I'm. Did I. Did I. Did I. Did I. Did I. Did, did, did. Did, did. Did, did. pressing the buttons and contributing. Yeah. Good job, good job. Show them about the muse.
Starting point is 00:42:06 Yeah. We won't be getting a nine-free movie next week. We're getting a nine-foubys. We're getting a knife. I think you guys should kiss and make up and make it. I think that's not Carl's fault. Go and kiss some touch cold.

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