The Ricky Gervais Show / An Idiot Abroad - Xfm S2E10 (October 26, 2002)
Episode Date: September 2, 2022Series two of the podcast began on 28 February 2006. It consisted of 6 episodes with the final one released on 4 April 2006. The series saw the return of Karl's Diary and Rockbusters. A new (though ...short-lived; it was only presented in the first episode) feature was also introduced in order to replace Pilkington's "Monkey News", called "Real Monkey News", where Gervais attempts to present facts about chimpanzees which are factual and scientific.With the start of series two, the formerly free Ricky Gervais Show shifted to a pay model – and as a result the show is now classified as an audiobook. It is available through Audible and the iTunes Store with individual episodes. The reason for this addition, according to Ricky on the podcast, is because The Guardian agreed to pay for the bandwidth for 12 episodes, and any more extra episodes would have to be paid for out of their personal finances.
Transcript
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Doves, caught by the river on XFM, 104.9.
I'm Ricky Gervais with me Steve Merchant and Carl Pilkington doing the button stuff.
Actually becoming a little bit of a producer.
Carl, yeah.
He's working hasn't he's got with a few games.
And we made him, he's getting a bit stressed when we shout him, because the
mics don't work, it was hanging off, it was too hot in here, it couldn't get the thing working last week. I mean I really would throw
this studio away and get a real one. Yeah, well I'd get one of those ones you can buy for
like tenor from Argos. Yeah, like Bon Tempe, my first... My first... Yeah, my first picture
a little picture of Carl on it. Yeah, exactly. That nothing in Rick have you done any work for this week no no
no no no okay Carl what we got what we got quick keep them there's
five past they're turning over already they're finding other things
melon there's melon Sue there's everything we've got we've got after the success of last week rock buster okay we've we've got the to the the the the the to the the the to the to to the the the the the the the the the the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the to th so th so th so th so th so to th th th the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th no no no no no no no no no no no no no the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th no th no th no th th no th th th th th thus thus thus the the the the the the thea' one one one one thoooooooooo the no one one one tho tho tho tho the no Sorry, were you on the same show as I? I thought it went all right last week.
Yeah, okay.
Right, so we'll be doing that.
Got some nice prizes which...
Oh, what prize?
What are the two films have you got?
Have you got?
Don't tell you, don't you?
No, I'll tell you.
If it's children of the audience with those a bit later, Rick, because there's some exciting stuff. That's going to be amazing.
Right. So I don't want to give too much away, Rick, but one of them is a copy of the office on
DVD. Is anything like maybe Bert Reynolds straight to video? Do any of those in? Sadly nothing quite as class. Yeah. Right. So we've got. So we've we. So we've we. So we've got we. So we've got we've got that, we've got that, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've got, we've that, that, that, that, that, th. So, th. th. th. th. I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I, I, I, I th. I. I, I. I, I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't th. I don't've got educating Ricky, where they teacher stuff. Because you taught
me that people used to eat tomatoes off lead plates in the land of Narnia last week, which
was good. Yeah. Is the only tomatoes after lead plates by the way? Why don't they think
other fruits and vegetables were poisonous? No it wasn't, it was because tomatoes had acid in them. Because, they was because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it was, it, it, it, it, it, it, it was, the, the, their, their, tom, tom, tom, tom, tomatoes, tom, tom, tom, tom, tom, tom, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they. Because, they. Because, they. Because, they. People, they. People, tom. People, tomatoes, tomatoes, tomatoes, tomatoes, people, tomatoes, people, tomatoes, tomatoes, people, tomatoes, tom, don't listen. Right? Well lots of fruits I've acid in them. Yeah, but they didn't eat them about then.
They didn't have bloody kiwi fruit and stuff to do that then.
Don't say bloody? You're a producer. I start saying, shit and cock and stuff you start saying
bloody. Play a play the... Right. Keep him hooked. We've still got a song with a story in it.
Yeah.
You don't want to play Babushka, do you?
He doesn't like the idea of Babushka.
I tried it as a story.
Yeah.
And he doesn't like it.
A devil went down to Georgia, someone sent in.
You know, he's looking for a solder still.
told you like that? Do you know, it the song the song the song the song? It the song? It the song? It's? It's? It's? It's? It's? It's? It's? It's? It's. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's like. It's the idea. It's the idea. It's the idea. It doesn't like. It doesn't like. It doesn't like. It doesn't like. It doesn't like. It doesn't like. It doesn't like. It doesn't like. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the idea. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It doesn't the the the the idea. It doesn't. It doesn't. It's not. a normal night. It's in sort of a deep South of America
and normally something like it's you know it's not the old Kent Road.
Right, okay go on. It goes into a pub. There's a devil in there. He's getting a bit
to drink and he's saying do you want to sort of gamble your soul away with me
and we'll see who's best at playing the violin and I think the lad wins in the end but it's not real enough where's
the one what what not like the shadow that got a feather up and started
pushing kids off bikes Rick I think you're referring to stuff that no one
made sense on last week yeah yeah yeah exactly I don't think let's let's
play mock turtles can you dig it and then we come back and we'll talk
about that I've come to the conclusion Rick we should to the to the to the th we th we th we th we th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the the the the the the th about that. I've come to the conclusion Rick we should never refer to stuff Carl said in the past because it would just take too long to explain. Okay, all right, that's fair
now. Mark Turtles. Can you dig it? Well I'm done there is I've taken the title and I've done it like I'm talking to someone. Sure. X-FM, 1 of 4. I'm looking at it. I'm a to to 4 and 4 and 4 and 4 4 4 and 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta to ta to to to to to to to to Are you going to be there? Are you going to come along? Are you aware of this? You're aware
of all this? Yeah I've heard about it. We can't name the opponent.
Because that should be a surprise or be it but anyway it's for charities. It's a charity
boxing match. Yeah and I always wanted to beat someone up for charity. Yeah exactly. It's a good cause. But the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thing. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. We can can can can't th. We can't th. We're th. We're th. We're. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. th. th. th. th. if you're aware of this car, but Ricky is one of these men who, you know, he doesn't mind sort of making a fool of himself on
the tele and being funny and stuff, but if people said to him, right, you can either be
the funniest man, you can either be the funniest man in Britain, or you could like beat some gangsters up in a pub, he would go that, please, just let me, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thr-a, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, a kind old man's being hassled like by some street use and you come in
and like smash some bottles over their heads and sort of so I'm against the
odd though against the odds yeah against the odds yeah I'm against the
yeah I mean he's got the idea of people go and don't five of them against sure sure sure come on the point well the point is he quite like the point he the you you you you you the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th they touch is touch is touch is they touch is they they they they they they they they they they the they the the the the the the 'd love the idea of people going, don't mess with Ricky Gilles. If someone said, don't mess with Ricky Geraes, that would be exciting, wouldn't it?
Never mess with Ricky Geraze, he will destroy you.
That's what you'd love.
And that's what you'd love.
And you used to do karate, didn't you?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, okay.
.
. because I always start working on. Oh yeah, one step away from black. Really? Yeah.
Okay.
So anyway, I was chatting to him last night in the pub because obviously the boxing match
is in about five weeks time I think, isn't it?
Yeah, I love him.
Yeah, I'll try.
the occasional one.
Anyway, he was sat there, Carl.
I don't know if you know this about Ricky, but he, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, the, th, th,, he got like a Monte Cristo out of his pocket. It was ludicrous. He looked like George Papard for the 18-months. It was a pathetic and he was
drinking Guinness. And I was saying to him, but aren't you doing a boxing match soon?
And um... I'm starting training next week. You're not concerned that it's going to have an impact? Well, I mean, what I'm saying is you know the boxing, that it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, th, th th th th th thi, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, it, it, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he was, and he, and he, he, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, th. It was, th. It was, th. It was, th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a th. It was a thi was a thi was thi was thi put in some effort and stuff. Like years and trading getting up at 530. Yeah. Yeah. Because you as you reminded me of a Frank Bruno
when he was preparing for Panto. Not when he used to prepare. I don't think he even spoke then
did he and drank? No. So I don't what's your thinking Rick? Because you know you're going to get your face pummeled you know that I mean you're gonna they're gonna destroy you You haven't got a chance that's why I left it this long so I definitely lost my looks but you haven't got a chance
You're gonna have you ever been taken have you ever taken about you're sorry it's sorry is this is this sort of psychological training because
No it's not psychological training it's a warning? I started to your friends and your loved ones and they all agree we've got a petition going. We're sending it to the BBC. Please do not let this man box.
Anyone else, please. But you're just, they're going to beat you. Seriously, I mean, have you
ever had a punt like a boxing glove in the face? No. I think you should let us punch you ne the next week live on the show. You'd like that wouldn't? No. No. No. No. No. No. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Because. Because. Because. Because. Because. Because. Because. Because. Because. Because you. Because you. Because you. Because you. Because you. Because you. Because you've to. to. to. to. to. the th. the th. their. the th. their. their. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. the. I. the. the. the. the. the. the. get used to it. Because I think you're going to either cry,
just start crying uncontrollably, or just run away. You'll just run away. You'll just climb out the ring and run run off.
Yeah. This is the same tactic. Ali used to get transformed in rumble in the jungle.
Oh dear. Because I think a boxing glove, because I know you're wearing like huge, aren't you wearing like huge, aren't you wearing boxing gloves boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing boxing using a normal one, amateur ones. Are you wearing boxing gloves like those ones they used to have
on gladiators? Those big foam gloves. Yeah, neck slap each other in the
race and yeah, and a big sumo suit so I should be okay. Do you get to, you get some kind of head protection do you? Yeah, yeah, it's hammer, it's a to say? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I............................................................. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. they. the. they. they. the. they. they. they. they're. they're say? No I mean so it's not there no no no no I mean I think the
hammer is head guards vest and 16 ounce gloves or something as opposed to
professional which is no vest they're chested now maybe I can ask to
fight their chested because I'd quite like to show off my body yeah if I I could I think I think wrestling is really good I thI the wrestling I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th is I th is I th is I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I think I thin I th is th is th is th I th I th I th I th I th I th I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is I th is I th is I th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is thin I thin I the the the the the are the are thee are theee are the are the are the are the the the the th I think, but I don't mean like those kind of like the rock and people like that. I'm talking about big daddy, giant hits, that
kind of, that would be good. Where you can just throw yourself on someone. Where they
can sort of like be nearly dying but then they can do a stomach butt. Yeah, yeah, stomach to stomach. That's a good move, isn't it in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in a their, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, in British, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, their, their, thi, their, their, their, I their, I, I their, I their, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I their, I th. I th. I th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, big him. Like two elephant seals fighting for a female.
Is it true that you've spent, knowing you, you've spent more time deciding what tune you're
going to enter the ring to?
I want to come out to California by Tupac and Dr. Cray.
I think that would be really good when that's embarrassing.
And I'm going to come up with loads of little midgets to midgu-I sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure sure. BBC think of that but yeah it might be a I don't know I maybe we should take
some suggestions as to songs that would be perhaps more appropriate okay
I get knocked down by up again a fatty bum bum yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah my record Carl it's gonna be dissed me it's gonna be dissed me
next week take a take a punch in the jaw next week
I know in the jaw next week. I'll never. Charing brakes, long distance on XFM 104.
On the way in, you know those little cars, they look like a little bubble car, they're
modern ones, they look like half a car.
Is that like a smart car?
Yeah, they just look like a, like a toy car and you can park them sideways.
There's only, is there any room for two people? Yeah.
It's just like the half of the front of a Volkswagen just cutting half, right?
And I saw one going on Oxford Street and it's a police car.
A real police car, right?
Really? Yeah.
And I mean, I thought what, what happens if they had to chase someone when they're they're the tha happen, the point, the point, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, tho, tho, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, but, but, but, but, but, but, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, and thi. And, and, and, and, and, and, and, thi. And, and, and, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, they. And, the side, it said something like cleaner, something more efficient.
So I think they're making the point that we're cruising round in this car, like we're on
the B and it's using less energy and stuff.
But the first thing I thought of, right, was that those two policemen, they must have been
going, oh gosh, don't let us off that one?
Can't we have the granada? Yeah, I mean it's so embarrassing. I know you know police that you know they're doing you know
But you've got to respect them. Yeah, of course yeah
city tuffs have got to right exactly I just don't know if you have to get the only thing more embarrassing
if you're really tall and you have to climb out of one your copper are there are any policemen out there who have been asked to drive one of the toughs to drive.... their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to to to to to to to to their to to to to to their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tou. I tou. I their their tou. I their their tou. I tou. I've the tou. tou. to be to be to be any tou. to this? The only thing that would be more embarrassing is if you had to patrol on one of those bikes the goodies used to ride.
That's the only thing I think that would be more pathetic.
A pogo stick? Yeah, it's so embarrassing. Or on roller skates.
Yeah. But not like roller skates, those really old roller skates. That you tie, that you tie on your socks? Yeah. That you. That you. That you. That you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that that that that's. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's the the the the the th. the the the only th. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's bikes that look like clown bikes that the couriers use now? They're about a foot high.
I saw it on it, my head turned, yeah.
They're really bizarre.
Just think that they fold up.
Yeah, but they're the police from chasing you on that.
Well I always remember that even in America when I started seeing policemen riding bikes. It didn't seem to me, they didn't seem, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, they're, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I'm really, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I.. I, I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm really really really really really really really. I'm really really really. They're really really, they're really, they're really, they're really, they're really, they're really, they're really, they're really, they're really, they're really, I saw.? You know they looks like they should be delivering newspapers. They're about 30
miles now and they can just deliver it exactly. Because like on motorbikes on a
Harley-Davidton or whatever I'm not messing with a cop, I mean chips. Now that's
cool coppers. Yeah, yeah. People in a smart car or you know that's it is a a bit embarrassing. But I suppose it is that or it's that or it is that or it is better is better is better is better or it's better or it's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's a the. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's better. It's a the. It's a the. It's a the. I's a the. I's a the. I. It's a the. It's a the. It's a the. It's a than walking you see it's like if you really want to be kind of
worried about the environment though you know those little taxes you see
that people pedal rain so holy yeah and when it's like a riot squad there's
four in the back yeah exactly but that's a thing right if they need to
arrest someone yeah here there go theyr they do what do they do because they do on this too so do they they have have have have have have have have have have have have they have they have they have they have they have they have they have they have they have they have they have they they they have they they they they they they they they they they they to to to to to to they to to to to the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the thooooooooooooooooo. the the the the the the so do they have to flag a cab down or something for the criminal?
Well, give you the money, get a receipt, take him back. You definitely will go there. Yeah.
You definitely will because we've been caught this way before. Exactly. The last one was he just ran off. No, I won't run off. Okay. Well, I'll tell you what, um, Mr. Police, but I'll. I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, well, well, I'll, well, well, well, I'll, well, well, well, well, I'll, well, well, well, I'll, well, I'll, well, I'll, well, I'll, I'll, well, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, well, I'll, what, what, well, well, I'll, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, get, I'll, get, I'll, get, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, wo, the, the, then I'll, okay go on then. Yeah, you definitely bring it back though, I will, I will. Isn't there something in America where, when they arrest someone in America, they
don't take them back to the station and fill out all the forms, they're just taking
back to the station and then they go and fill the forms out in a cafe or something, so they're still looking out. Yeah, Kyle to tell me, their, their, the, the, the, the, they, they, they, they, they, they, th, they, th, they, thol, is, is, is, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't the, isn't there, there, isn't, there, isn't, isn't, there, isn't, isn't, isn't, there, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn't, isn Yeah, so they're doing all their paperwork but they're in the you know a cafe window and they're looking out. Do you know like how they say in this country so much
police times wasted by having to go back to the office and filling out loads of forms?
That sounds like some policemen going, you know I could get a lot more work done. Yeah, if I was in Starbucks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a lot. There's a lot there's a lot there's a lot there's a lot the the the the the the the the the the the the they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're say they're say they're say, they're they're they're they're they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they say they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're say they're say, they're saying they're saying they're saying, they're saying, they're saying, they're they're saying, they're they're saying, they're they're they're they're they're they're they're I'll get to keep the receipts. I mean I've got safest is if I didn't wear my uniform and probably got drunk.
Yeah, yeah, with some mates.
Or a lot, a lot happens in, you know, looking out in my bedroom window.
So if I was just like snoozing, I was just, oh look out, I was just, oh look out, oh, look out, aye. Come here. Come here. Apparently there's a lot there. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. the the the the the the the the thathea' the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah, th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. t t t t t too. t t t t t t th th th th threat. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.bea over the next two weeks. Do there's a police minister who has to drive one of those cars?
Were you annoyed when your side went?
It is the most embarrassing.
Yeah.
Definitely.
Yeah.
Definitely.
No, I think the pogo stick.
Well, the pogo stick.
The triple.
The t pedaling. I'm in the basket in the front of my teach you.
Play a replica, Carl, what do you got?
What do you want?
Mark the Hoopol?
Oh, Mark the Hoopol, yeah.
Do you go out of the library?
I had one of the library.
I had one.
It's one of the video for that? No, but absolutely magnificent. Is it? It's brilliant. I was the one who's walking backwards in the woods. Oh yes, I have.
Yeah. Absolutely extraordinary. I like all the videos. I think they're great. I still haven't worked out
I'd like to do that one with the, whether it's a filter they just turn up the light. Oh, I'm just walking along yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's impressive. And it's. And it's. And it's. And it's. And it's. And it's. And it's. And it's. And it's. And it's. Yeah. Yeah. And it's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's. Yeah. And it's. Yeah. Yeah. And it's. And it's. And it's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. the. the. the. the. I'm. the. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. win awards, I like Coldplay. Yeah, no, good reason. Rick, can I just, sorry I don't mean to abuse our position again, but Bruce Springsteen's
performing in London tomorrow night and you remember I made an appeal to try and get a free
ticket?
Well I don't even mind paying you, I try to pay to try and I don't even to be ripped off do you? No don't be crazy, you know, ideally half price. Yeah.
And I just, I've been chasing kind of my tale really.
I just, I'm not going, I'm not going.
And I'm desperate to see you the man.
I mean, he's gonna do a great concert.
It's his only one in London.
I can't believe I can't get a ticket. I've asked Carl, he's done nothing. No, no, no, come on a very good point.
Carl, tell what you said when he was winging in the box break.
No, but first of all, while she moaned him, you also asked in the week for a badly drawn boy album.
Yeah, you got in today, there's one there for you. Yeah, but it's the thin' and yeah, but it's like, but it's like, but, but, but, but, but, but, thin, thin, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, to, too. Caro, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, theught me to the bastards. Yeah, but only because no one else would probably want to go with you.
Yeah, I can't believe that. What is this? I do not believe that. Oh Steve, I'm going to stitch you up now,
Carl, and it's in a nice way and don't worry, it won't be too bad. to what is this? Right, okay. Okay.
You know I'm in a very frail mood at the moment because I'm not going to see Bruce.
This is funny because we and him have been like sending that trivia back and forth to each
other, which is another point, right?
I sent him, oh, well, I'll get to that in a minute.
I thought he'd really be amazed with them. While you're fiddling, if you can make my dream come true to go and see Bruce
Springsteen tomorrow, then give us a call on the usual number. But like I said, Steve,
what? It wouldn't be, right? You just said when the song was on, can't believe it, right? We
work at XFM and I can't get tickets for Springsteen, of pay for, but think of the, yeah, but if it's sold out, it's sold out. Yeah, but that's just something they say.
That's just what they say is it.
Right, so everybody on local radio stations say, do you know, I like that Bruce Springsteen,
I want a free ticket, right?
So another 400 people, I want to phone up at the hours in. Right? So another 400 people turn up at the gig. They cram them all in,
there's people being crushed, you know, they've paid the money early, they were up early that day
when the phone lines were open, whilst you were probably sleeping and that, so they're dedicated
and they're the ones at the front getting crushed. Would you mind that? Would you mind why are that? Why are they're they? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? that? that? that? that? that? that? th. th. they? th. they? they? th. th. they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they're they're they're they're they? They're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? They? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they're they're they're they're th.. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they at the side of the stage and watch him. Yeah, but I don't mind. But everyone will say that then. And then before you know it,
no one can see anything because you're on the same.
Leave it. Right, I'm going to give you this, I'm now handing over my mobile phone to
Steve to read the, you can see it's from Carl at the top, but just read it out out out. Is out out out out out out out out out it out. To see at night as well as an owl, you would need eyes the size of
grapefruits if only Stephen could turn his head right round as well. Carl, I can't believe
it. What upsets me most, Carl, right? It's not the fact that you've been slagging me off
behind my back, it's the fact that you've got the cheek to come on here and moralise because you've failed to get me ticket and make the the to, the the to, their, their, to, their, their, their, to, their, their, their, their, and, their, and say, their, and say, and say, and say, and, their, their, their, their, and, and, and, and, their, their, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, come, and, come, and, come, come, and, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, and, come, and, and, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, and, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come.a'''''''''''''eru''eru'eru'eru'eru'eroyu'eru'eru'eru'eroyu'erbueu'erbueuiol'eroyuiolk, come tickets and make a dream come true.
You've come on here trying to pass the buck and say that it's a health and safety problem.
Well in actual fact, it's a Carl Pilkington problem.
Don't look that, do that.
I'm devastated.
I'm devastated.
I know.
I don't know.
I'm upset.
I'm upset. It's 0870800, 800, 1234, but if it's sold out, Steve, it's sold out. A bit of a classic here?
REM.
I bet if Ricky White to go it would be fine.
I'm sure someone could sort it out then.
Who?
If Ricky Gervaise wants to go, then you can.
Are you?
No?
No.
No.
No. You too. Electrical Storm. That's great. That's great. I love that. On XFM.
104.9 on Wreckage of A's with me, Steve Merchant and Carl Pilkerton.
Carl, I want you to tell Steve what you told me in the week.
About the snake, about the anaconda. How to... Right. This is Carl's method.
the 30-foot-long biggest, scariest snake. No you were talkinginginginginginginginginging the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to the to to to the too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too, to. to. to. to. to. to. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. thi. the. the. the. the. the the the. the the the the the the the. I. I. I. I too. I too. I too. I too. I. I. I. I. I. I too. I. scariest snake in the world. No you were talking about stuff weren't you about in jungles and that and animals.
That we do. Right.
And I remember reading about, say if you're in the jungle and you get tired and you go to sleep,
right, and you sort of wake up and you feel something on your leg and you look down
and it's an alaconda, right?
Yes. And it's, it's swallowing your feet.
Because apparently they always go from the feet up. They never eat you from the head.
So um... Okay. Shall I save these points to the end? Because that's wrong.
Make a list of the point. They always eat your head first because they'll have to take a capibara or even a rat, they'll take it from the head first. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So that. So that. So that. So that. So that. So that's. So that's. So that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. They're they're they're they're they're. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, they're they're, they're, they're they're, they're they're they're they're they're they're all, they're they're they're all. So, they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're the way the fur goes where they have to take a capibara or even a rat, they take it from the head first.
But make it, make a point.
Make some nose.
Okay, next, go on, so they always eat you from the feet, go on.
So they're swallowing your feet.
And it said on the, on Don't, don't try and
kick it off. Just let it sort of swallow you. But only up to your knees. Okay. Why not kick
it off? It's that way? Because it, I think it sort of gets a bit angry, it starts thrashing
about and it can swallow faster, I think. I'm guessing that bit. Okay. Just put a question mark by that there. I pop a question mark next to
eat knees. So eat it up to your knees. It's up to your knees. And then what you do is you
get a knife. Yeah. Okay. And how do you get a knife? And how do you get a knife? Do you walk over to the kitchen? I was going to pop over, get a knife. the knife. the knife. to get the knife. to. the knife. to. the knife. to. the knife. the knife. to. the knife. the knife. to. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. to. the the to. to. the. the. the the to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. the. the. the. the the t. t. tot. tap. tot. tap. t. tap. t. to. the the the the the the the. I pop. I pop. I. I. I. to the kitchen? I was going to pop over get knife. Where's that coming from? Get to the knife. Always have a knife. Always have a knife. Always have a knife. Always have a knife. Always have a knife. Always have a knife. Yeah. Suppose you're wearing
combat trousers and the knife is actually in that, you know, those, the trousers by the knee, the sort of pocket by the knee, what happens then? You could I suppose you could still reach in into the mouth, couldn't you? So anyway, you've got a knife, let's say
you've got a knife, let's say you've fallen asleep, the anaconda's chewing your feet,
you let it eat up to the knees, you've got a knife, what do you do then, Carl? Right. So
he's up to your knees and what you get you you you you the knife you you you the knife you you the knife you you the knife you the knife you get your the knife the knife you get your the knife the knife you get your the knife the knife the knife like you know like either side of the
lips right so you're sort of cutting it in half right like a Chelsea smile and
it can't yeah that's right you can't do anything it wasn't ready for that
it can't move about because it's got like your legs in its mouth and
peel it off and walk away
okay my main point really is this Carl, never will an anaconda or
any constrictor, Python, or constrictor, just start heating a sleeping man. He will clush
you to death first. That's where they're called constrictors. They're not called
goblers, are they? Or wholly swallowers. They're called constrictors. Why would he start heating something? Is that? Are they they take down out? Are they they the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, th. tho, tho,'re not called goblers are they or wholly swallowers. They're called constrictors. Why would he start heating something?
Is that, are they take down antelope? Just start touring their leg? Oh it's gone
off. I'll tell you what, lads. They get together, the snakes got out and said, I'll tell you what, we're losing a lot of prey by just living at their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's, they's, they's, they's, they's, they. they's, they. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they they're they. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're the. Why they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they.'t move then we can swallow them. You're a fool. So anyway right, so I was
telling him this bit of information because we started a feature last week, well week before.
Sorry Carl can we just go back to the crushing you to death first? Yeah but well I read it.
He's one he's one there he's beating you there Rick okay. Did it say what to do? Did it say what to do if it's supposed it had this meeting. He this this this this this this the he? he. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's to to to to to to to to be. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. I. It's. I. I. I. I. I. I. t. I. t. I. t. t. I. t. I. t. I. t. I. I. I. the. I. It's. It's. there Rick. Okay. Did it say what to do if it starts between the truth? No no no no no did it? Did it say what to do if it says a person it had this meeting,
it had this meeting and it started crushing it and you woke up and it was actually round
your chest and every time you try to take a breath and breathe that a little bit it just tied his grip because it can feel that. What would what would you do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do th you th you th. What would you th. What would you th. What would you th. What would do you th. What would do th. What do thi thi thi. What do th. th. What, what th. th. th. th. th. th. th. What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what th, what you th, what you th, what you th, what you th. What you th. What you th. What do, what you th. What do do do you th. What do you th. What do you the, what you the. What do you that, what you thateateateateateateat, what you, what you that, what you that, what do, what do, what do, what do, what do you that, what you that, what you that, what of tighten yourself up anyway because I've read about that. If
the one does start wrapping around you, you sort of make yourself into a ball, first of all,
and it'll wrap around you but it's all right because you're protecting your lungs so you
can't crush you and then you just sort of shout for help. And you and you...
Oh, show help with this 30 for snake? Do you know how it works? It gets as tight as it can, it can feel as tight
as it can, right, with these huge, huge muscles, right? When you, leave a bit of breath out,
it tightens again. You won't be that out of breath, you haven't been running anywhere, so
you can just go. What, and when do you get the new mouth full of oxygen? Just, breathe very slowly like you do. How? Do you know what breathing
is? Do you know what breathing is? It's extending your ribcage, right, intercostal muscles
between the ribs, contract like that, okay, making the ribcage expand which pulls air
in through, it's like a bellow, you can't just breathe via the mind. It's a physical
process. It's your rib cage. Pulling out... maybe I'm special but I can do little breaths without my ribcage.
Player record Steve.
You're special record?
No, no, no, no. You can't take little breaths without moving your ribcage.
Can I just give you the titles because we're really out of time.
We've got a competition to do. Okay, alright who survives if you cross-land in the jungle?
Right.
So, what is this?
What are you doing now?
This is educating Ricky.
Oh good, I'm going to look forward to this.
Three topics that I teach you every week.
Yeah.
Now obviously I should just remind people you normally summarize each of these in a kind of bulletin from two this week. Right we've got stocking Aiken and Waterman. Stocking Ake and Waterman? Yeah. What else have we got? We've also got, what else is it?
It's not his vault? Yeah? It's not what? It's not his vault. Okay. And we've also got,
get a lobe of this.. Carl they're genius. Rick can we
choose you one of these after new order?
Oh, food fiders and all my life on XFM 104.9 I'm making you made with me, Stephen
Muncheon and Carl Pilkington.
Just before we do educating Ricky, this is where Carl thinks he can give me something of interest
and teach me something
to take away. Last week I found out that somewhere in a strange land people thought tomatoes
were poisonous because they had with lead. Things like that. What was the other one you told
me? What else was it last week? Uh, bit of worms? Got me off. Oh, I sent them a text message. I was on the train, a bit bored and I read in I think
it was Metro, scientists have found out that worms get stressed and they found out that the
fat ones didn't live as long and when they checked the thin ones that lived longer they
found out they had a gene for de-stressing them.
All right, Carl, do you remember what you said? No. He went with
that stupid, isn't it? He said, did these other ones die of natural causes? I went,
yeah, he went, yeah, it went, all right. Because it could be that the fat ones
couldn't get off the pavement quick enough well as fat. I think the reason that the worms are getting stressed is because people like Carl are
cutting them in half to try and make two snakes.
Two worms.
Yeah.
That's the concern.
He said they can't even commit suicide if they're stressed by cutting their throat. I also sent them what I thought was quite interesting that the science has the elephant, the elephant, the elephant, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, the science, thi, their, thi, thinks, thinks, thi, they, their, they, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they, they, they, they, they, they, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, tha, thin, thin, thin, their, their, their, their, try, try, tha, try, tha, try, tryi, try and try and try and try and, tryi, tryi, t scientists have found that the elephant hasn't got the best memory, the sea lion has based on, they've got a sea lion and they got it back into the old laboratory.
Ten years after it had taught it a simple trick and it could still do the trick.
What did you say to that, Carl?
I'd say they don't go up to much anyway, so if you do, I mean I like sea lions, it look nice and everything, but what do they do? What was it? What do we do?
What do they do? What do they do? What do we do? What do we do? What do we do? A cat? It's a cat first, Steve said, as far as I'm concerned. Like, it's their toy. to what's good for th. th. th. th. their th. th. th. th. their their th. their their their their their their their their their th. It's their their their their th. It's their as their as I's their their their as their as I's their as I's their as I's their as I's their as their as I's their as their as their as their as their as their is their as their as their as their as their as their as their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thii. It's thi. It's thi. It's thathea. It's toea. toea good for us? Well, anyway. Educating Ricky. Good to be settled that then, go on.
The titles that are meant to sort of pull you in. Yeah. We've got, what was it? So
stocking, aching and waterman. Yeah. You've got, it's not his vault. And get a low with this. Get a low with this. so. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. Anyway. that. that. Anyway. Anyway. that. that. Anyway. that. that. that. that. that. Anyway. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. What. that?. What. What? that. What. What. What, what, what, what, what, what that. What, what that. What that. What that? What that. What that. What that, what that that that. What that, what that that that that that that that. What that that. What that. What was, what that? What's not his vault and get a lobe of this.
Get a lobe of this. So which pun do I pick first? I think I'll go for get a lobe of this.
Get a lobe of this. Yeah, get a lobe of this. Well that's a story about a girl who, she was deaf, right, for four years.
And, um, it happened quite a bit like this.
What year or was it about, I think it was about, yeah quite a bit back.
She was deaf for about four years, having an argument with a mummich said which she didn't quite understand
because I don't know how they'd do that. But she was having an argument and a man pushed against a wall and she banged
her head and a hearing came back. Okay. Uh, was she wearing a walkman and it fell out?
And she'd realize, oh, there's no explanation. There's no explanation? Why is that teaching me something
then? Right, so I knew you'd say this, right? So I thought right, I'll stick something on it. Do you know that bees are deaf? No! If you can't just... no! If you ask someone someone they don't
the answer, they don't tell you something else then. I can't answer that, I'll tell you
something else. Imagine that if you ask a teacher. Look, how do birds fly? Wow if you're going to do that. Tallest building is, I mean what...
Well, that was the equivalent, Carl, of running away.
Yeah, the intellectual equivalent of going, look over there as a monster.
Listen, what do you mean? What is she... Okay, so she...
So she, her hearing thing, there's no explanation. Or you don't know. Well, there isn't one, they're the doctor. Look. Look. Look. Look. Look. Look. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tallest. their. tallest. tallest. their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. T. T. T. T. T. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. that. That. That. That. th. the. the. That. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. tall is. tall is. tall is. tall is. tall is. tall is. tallest. tallest. tallest. tallest. tallest. tallest. tallest. tall is. tallest. tall is. tall is. T. The. tall is. T. There's no explanation. There's no explanation. Well there isn't one this they really, they're expedited. But the only thing, did the doctor's not look into it?
No I think they just said oh that's good.
So again I don't, where did this information, is that, if you read this one, is that all they put on it? There was once a deaf woman who at her end she came. It was. It. It. It. It. It. It. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was the their. It was their. It was their. It was their. It was their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their their their their their not. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was not. It was not. It was not. It was not. It was not. It was a the the the the the the the the the the the the the doctor. It was not. It was not. It was not a good book that. Was there three more pages you just couldn't be bothered to read all? Yeah.
No, no, it was just a little bit and it was. Was there a little picture, a cartoon picture?
No pictures are just like it. Owl pictures are you going to go, oh, oh, oh, I can't know. If you're, their tho' th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho'er's tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' their' their' their' their' their' their' their'er. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. th. th. th. be an interesting story. Right, it's not his vault. This fella,
what year? Ages ago? I'd say in the 70s. Okay. Would you? Any evidence for that? And, uh...
does he wear flays in the story? Is that your reason? No, it's a bit like Yorigella this fellow, right? Where he's electric. And, um, if he walks past the telly, the telewood
fizz. If he walked past the radio, it all goes like that. His hair stuck up all the time.
And it'd be having a bath and everything will be all right and then the power would
sort of switch on in his body and the electric in his body made him jump out of the bath. So... What do you mean so? What does that so mean?
You've given us nothing? You've given us nothing. You'd have to at least give us the scientific
explanation. Yeah. Electric heels have 400 volts in them. I resist the running away again?
What was that one called? Yeah, but they, but there's not his vault. But there's a reason... They, that... That... That is not his the so so so so so so? So so so? So that so so? So that so so? So that so so? So that so so so? So, he so? So, he so so? So, that so? So, that so so so that so, that so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, what so, so, so, so, so that so that so that, what that, what that, what that, what that, what that, what that, what that, what so that, what so that, so, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, so that, that, what so that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, so? What so, what so, what so, that, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, what is so, so, so, so, so, what is that, so, so, what is that, so, so, so, what is that, so that, so, what is that one called? Yeah but they they but there's not his vault but there's a reason they they that I thought it's gonna be similar about I
think I think we should do this the other way around I think you should tell
us the story and then we'll hear the pun
he's not his fault it's nice right let's let let's leave it
let's let it. Play it to you. I get it.
Edgy, Ricky.
We're not doing it.
No, we are.
Oh, don't look at me like that.
Are you in a bad mood?
The coral dreaming of you.
Right, do the last one.
to do the last one.
Carl's saying we never doing this again because we don't know how good this feature is mate. Right, last one. Yeah. Stocking Aiken and Waterman.
Go on and tell me about that one.
What's that?
What am I going to learn from this?
Right, well, do you know the same?
Put a sock in it?
Ha'a'lap.
the saut.
topah up. Years ago. Yeah. Sorry, am I right? No, not really. Ages ago.
Late in 70s? 50s, I can say. Do you know the old grammar phone? Yeah. Yeah. Well, those
stereos didn't have a volume control on them. Right? So they'd be listening to
a sock in the... And you'd put something like a sock. That's a real one you see? That's totally. that's tho- the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. the th. th. th. the the th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thooom's th. th. th. thoe. So thoome. So-I's thozy. I's thoes. I's thoes. I's the thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I thoes. I th. I th. I the th. I th. I the th. I's the the the the th. I's the the the the the the the the the th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I've thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-s. I've. th. th. th. their. the mute you put something like a sock that's a real one you see that's taught me something that's that's good that's excellent Carl that is the that is
the only one that counts like chewing the fat if they're true I'm assuming
they are it works it's of interest I haven't got it verified yet but
that is educating Ricky that's brilliant I will say the other two were more entertaining. So you know, I don't... Do you understand the distinction though between that one and
electrical man? And, or I've hit me head, I can hear you mom.
Yeah. Can you see the difference though? Or all really...
All three, because I, when I read all three, I took something away from all of them.
What did you take away from the electrical man? So saw, imagine that, imagine how annoying that would be.
But that's not education. And it's not taking anything away.
Think about it right? We take our lives for granted all the time, don't you? You get up in
the morning, it's like, oh I'll get up and walk for a shower. Some people people can't walk, right? this guy they. they. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's that's that's, that's, that's not that's not that's not that's not, that's not that's not, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's not. It's not. It's not, that's not, that's not, that's not, that's not, that's not, they. Oh. Oh, that's not, that's not, that's not, that's not, that's not that's not, that's not. Oh. It's not know what I mean? It's nice to have a bath, isn't it when you got time on your hands, you can relax. This guy can't even do that. It might be all
all right for a bit, but he's not really enjoying it because at any moment it could strike.
Yeah. So he can't even do that. He can't call me his air because he can't call a mess. Yeah, he can't watch. He can't watch. He's not the they. He's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's. He's not. He's. He's. He's. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's. He's. He's not. He's not. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's th. He's th. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's not. He's th can't work with machinery. Right, he'll probably blow a fuse. Yeah, so he just sits around.
Think about it, what can he do?
What normal things can he do?
Skateboarding?
Going for long walks?
Yeah.
Put a wet suit on.
Put a wet suit on and walk around with the flippers and wet suits. the wet suit's not like a dinner jacket that's like, th. th. th. What, th. th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, the thi. W. W. He's the round the flippers and wet suits not like a dinner jacket that's like really
yeah all I'm saying is think do you know I mean? Oh okay and what was the girl
the girl's death for four years it to Ed yeah that's just what have you
what is that well imagine imagine how happy you'd be remember that time
I nearly died when I choked and I missed the freeze pop.
Tell us that one again? No I told you, don't know.
Tell us again. Yeah but the people will remember it and then it's...
They weren't listening. Go on. What happened?
It was ages ago when my mom and dad used to go out and shopping on the Friday.
Get the food. Get the food in. Get a week's load of food in the cupboard and that and we'd come in with all the food and we'd all
be like, oh God, you know, there's no food left on a Thursday really so we'd all be hungry
on the Friday by the time the food got in.
I love that!
I'd like to imagine like jackal puppies.
Yeah.
Just like like, ah, look in your parents' mouth for food as they come from the supermarket, they're empty in the box. Ah, a kid had got some biscuits and what have you?
I, I, I, I, just a feeding frenzy, like pigeons.
I grabbed the Mr. Freeze pop.
I knocked it back really quick but it hasn't, it wasn't frozen.
So I knocked it back so it was like a liquid and it went down the wrong way, right?
I was nearly died. It must have been about, how long you go before you die? A couple of minutes to do it. I reckon about a minute 50. Right? I was, I was really close to dying. How do you know you
were close to dying? Me? Did your life flash before you? No, but I just was like...
There's loads of incidents of him eating pops. Yeah, exactly. I just was
40 of those. What do you think you'd see if your. Whatever, right? What do you think you see if your life flash past you?
What do you think?
Which elements would stand out for you do you think?
What, what, uh, start now?
Go back, zoon.
What do you remember?
What's the first thing you remember?
As a kid.
Yeah, just d'u Yeah. Okay what is you what's the next one? Right next one's probably being at
primary school with Lindsay. Yeah was that your girlfriend? Well a little friend
who was a girl sure. And we used to have like tins with with letters and you'd
have to write stuff but anyway what are we doing? Right so anyway I'm intrigued by
the dog that was licking your face.
We won't win that!
No, it's a great feature.
I just think you need to be little bit more careful about what you consider to be in location.
All right, all right.
All right, well, we'll work on it next.
Play the play, play tune. We'll come back with rockbusters. What do you want to? Let's play a bit of Tupac.
That's what I'm coming out to, isn't it?
Exactly. Yeah. Yeah.
Imagine it.
Wack it up.
Wack it up.
Tupac.
Tupac.
The's a big tune that Ricky.
the the the the the the the the tap a tap a tap a tap a tap a tap a tap a tap a tap a tap a tap a tap Pete oh go on go on it's just we should have done this a lot earlier why it keeps him
it keeps them hooked in right if you haven't heard the game before I'll give
you some initials bit of a cryptic clue and those initials and the cryptic
clue makes up some band not might not be an XFN band but it's a band
or a pop group or an artist or something. Yeah. It's on email. What's the feature called? What's the feature called? Rockbusters?
Rockbusters, yeah? Do you want to, uh, we do this on email? I think we all too, because you don't like
to take calls from the public do, do you? Well, he can't work the machine? No, that's absolutely right. It's not It's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just just just just just just just that, it's just just just just just just just that, it's just just just just just that, it's just just just just that, it's just just just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it, it, it's that, it's that, it, it's that, it, it's that, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just that, it's just the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the a laptop at their disposal at this precise moment anyway there's some cracking prizes Rick you
were pleased to know that obviously once again that Carla's managed to
collect together an arbitrary assortment of giveaways stuff I mean where did
you get these from did you did you did you did you what I mean
seriously where did you get them from it because it's such an what kind of a person you'd to the the the the to the to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to to the to to to to their because because because because because because because because because because because because because because because because I I their their I their I their I their I their I've their what what I'm their what I'm their what I was their what I was their what I'm their what I was I'm their I'm their I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I was I their I their I their what what what what what what I I their I I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I'm they I'm they I'm they I'm they. to to they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. I'm the the want these items. Right. It's such an arbitrary selection. I don't know what kind of a person you'd be.
Read them out. What have we got?
Well, there's another XFM compilation which obviously you've obviously nicked from somewhere
in the office. Yeah, it's a good compilation, remix.
There's an album here which is a pro-mum album with two This is the album, didn't we give this one away last week?
This is just an arbitrary compilation album, again one of those kind of...
Is that the actual one you didn't send, Carl? No, no. To sack, I've got a couple of them.
I've got a job lot of them. Surprise, the office on DVD. Which is ludicrous. Oh, I've seen it from here. What film if it, listen, listen, dear XFM listener,
it's half two, you know, it's just a bit windy out your... Probably going to stay in this
evening. Maybe a bit of shopping you got, and then in a stay in today, or what film would
you really want to, no, seriously, think,the big releases. Yeah, yeah, it's great. Put them out of their misery, Steve. They'll be watching this tonight if they're a lucky
winner. It's the movie Stigmata. Stigmata with Patricia Arquette and Gabriel Burns. So look for
that. That's the big one. That is brilliant. Oh, look at Carl's face. He's actually offended. Because he's the only one that puts any work into this show.
And he's got competitions, he's got educating Ricky, rockbuster.
He's got a song with a story to come that he's like trapped in, oh gone through him.
It's unbelievable.
Yeah, so you're playing for that collection of arbitrary goodies.
Plus the big prize this week, Stigmata
featuring Gabriel Burn.
Oh dear.
About a woman who I think starts bleeding from their hands.
It's a horror film I think.
You have to be 18 or over to take part.
It's not, it's not terrible.
It's all right.
Is it better than children of the corn?
I haven't seen children of the corn.
I haven't seen Children in the Corn. Go on then. Right. So next week Teen Wolf 2.
Go on. Go on. It is the... And Tony Banks's own solo album, Bank's statement. Tony Banks, remember is the musician from the Much Love Genesis, but we've got that album to give away.
All right then. To win those exclusive prizes. Yeah, yeah. You've got to email in, Ricky. Riccivase at XFM.co. UK. I saw. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the their. I. I. I their. I their. I their. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. the the the th. th. the the the th. th. th. tine. tine. tine. tine. tine. tine. tine. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've. tune. tune. tune.e.e. tune. tune. tune. tune. tune. tune. tune. tune. tune. tune. I. t those exclusive prizes. Yeah, yeah. You've got an email in, Ricky. Givace at XFM.co. UK. I saw a cellatape dispenser in the office of ways you want.
There's a pair of gloves, I don't know who's out but they're out there and they've been
there for a week so. Let's send them as well. A pair of gloves. T. T. A. T. A. C. A. C. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. A. A. A. A. A. S. A. A. A. A. A. S. A. A. S. A. A. S. A. A. A. S. A. A. S. A. A. A. S. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. S.. Initials JT. Initials JT. What's the cryptic clue?
Cryptic clue. At the moment I'm in a river full of logs. Hold on. Yeah. JT. And what's
the clue again? At the moment I'm in a river full of logs? Full of logs? Yep.
Okay. So who could it be JT? At the moment I'm in a river full of logs. Yeah. the clue that lad's gottasmah- the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thu. thu. thu. thu, th' th' th' th' th' thi thi the thi-a' th' th' th' th' thi' thi' the thi' the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the, the, the, thr-a' thri thri trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. the. the., there's three of them you've got to get. Letter is W, yeah.
The clue, that lad's got bad asthma.
That lad has got bad asthma.
I've got that one already.
W and finally, the last one is the letter C.
Yeah.
And the cryptic clue is Carl is one of these. Mousetrap is that musical isn't it?
This isn't a clue by the way.
It is called Mouse Trap isn't it?
There's not a musical but it's a whodan, it's a play.
It's a whoddaniard, yeah, that's a clue.
I saw that.
Imagine that on the real blockbus.
Bob's going, oh, here we go.
Put the camera back on. Yeah. So the letter is C and the cryptic clue. I saw that mouse
trap the other night, but the eating in the theater was knackered. What? What? The heating in the the theater was nacked. The heating in the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thateraterater isater is thater is thater is thater is thater is nater is nurtle is nurtle is nurtle is nurtle is nurtle is nurtle is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. Ister is. thater is. thater is. thater is. thater is. thater is. thater is. thater is. thater is. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. that one already as well. Yeah. I mean these are the first ones are hard, but the so just a quick reminder JT was the first one at the moment I'm in a river full of logs
full of logs full of logs yeah, okay second one W that lads got bad asthma and the last one
was see I saw that mouse trapped the other night but the the heating in the thirterms and ruin the whole thing. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's. I's. I's. I'm. I'm. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I's. I's. I's. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. the the t. t. t. t. t. t.e. t. t.e. t. t. t. t. t. t. tree. t. t. t. t. t. t whole thing. Okay. So Ricky. Jovees at XFM. UK is the email address.
You can win. I'm confused the river full of logs. I'm in a river full of logs.
Well we'll do it in about 20 minutes. Yeah, you've got to stay tuned for the answers.
It's not the quickest so don't go rushing and sort of messing it up.
Think about it and it's random email anyway so there's no rush all right and
if you want to email you're welcome to say please do not send me the
prizes even if I win we can put that on there if you don't want that junk in
your house right the reason we you know we usually sort of play a record
out of our break don't we yeah car the try to the true car is to the. Carl is so concerned with the th. Car th. Car th. Car th. Car is so is so th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi is so thi is so thi is so is so is so is so is so is so is so thi tho tho tho tho th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is so is th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi the the the the the the to the the the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi competition he hasn't got a record ready sure got one I got one I got one okay sorry are you yeah do a quick recap a week quick recap I even just say it
I really not I'm not interested yeah go on quick still send your emails in
jay t it's some initials of a band just in case you didn't hear it last week
if I said a K and an exploding pet that would be atomic kitten yeah right they know
they know what clue is so JT at the moment I'm in a river full of logs, W-U, that lad's got bad asthma and see, I saw that mouse trap the other night, the
heating wasn't working, it ruined the night and yeah, like that's it. Ricky Dr. Vase, FM.
at UK. Stigmata, Stigmata. Richard Ashcroft, check the meaning. today It's more like it now, isn't it? Before we were someone to press the buttons, then he was somebody who we just made talk like a performing monkey.
I hear it's going to be leered away by the Today program on Radio 4.
Because they've lost their news editor, I think.
I'm indicating Ricky, quite topical.
Absolutely.
Isn't it? Yeah. Well, so when you say topical, this is a topical, this, this, this, this, thapical, thapical, thapical, thapical, thi.
. This is topical word, this happened ages ago.
Your words, not mine.
Have they got a Ricky who works there?
We can look into that.
So this is a big point of competition.
They've got to be given away.
This is rockbuster.
We've got obviously the big price, Stigmata.
Yeah. I'm not going to give the price to ERA, I think it's Ere or her, I emailed, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they've got, th, th. they've got, they've got, they've got, they've got, they've got, they've got, they've got, they've got, they've they've, they've, they've, we've, we've they's, we've the, we've, we've the, we've the, we've, we've, we've................. th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to th to th to th th th th th th thi. they're th th th thi. Ira, but she or he emailed in the right answers and then said, if you could enclose the receipt for Stigmata, that would be much appreciated.
I'm amazed by the number of responses we've had.
And someone wants a copy of Tony Banks's solo album, which I was mucking around, so we'd be better
buy that in the week to give it away because I think that would be amazing prize to give away. If you just just the clues the clues the clues the the the the the the the the th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm thinks, I'm th, I'm th, I'm tho, but I'm tho, but I'm tho, but I'm tho, but I'm tham, but I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm tho, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm th clues again, give the clues again, give the answers right well the one that everyone was struggling with was the
first one. Yeah, I save that so we'll go to the second one W. W. that the
the second one, W. Yeah, we know that. What was it? Was it weaser? Yeah. The last one, C. The clue was a mouse the tree. The clue was a the clue. the clue was, I I I I I I I I I I the clue. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. I the the the the the clue. C. C. C. I was. C. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the one. So, so. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I. So, I was. So, I was, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. So, I was. Soered in the restaurant, in the thirter and it ruined
the night.
So it was a cold play wasn't it?
Yeah, that's a kind of play.
And JT, at the moment I'm in a river full of logs.
At the moment I'm in a river full of logs.
Well I had to say there were some wrong answers, I'm in Timber Lake. Just in Timber Lake. We had some wrong answers that included Jethro Tull and James Taylor.
I don't know how that relates to time.
I'm annoyed at Lake when he clearly said river.
I mean that's the first thing that cropped up.
Not I'm in some water full of logs at the moment, yeah, I'm in the water full of logs. river so not like that annoys me I mean I didn't get it fair enough I should
have worked out I should have tried to think like you a lot of people obviously
think like you which is which I'm you know worried about but yeah
I did have a winner James Taylor it's great
James Taylor yeah yeah yeah James Taylor yeah yeah
have a winner Steve he's gonna wrap them, okay?
I did have a winner, I've just, I've just lost them.
Needless to say that lucky person.
It won't be watching Stigmata tonight.
Just randomly, it's a draw by the way, it's not the first one, I'll just, I said to Carl, in the first one, I said, I said, I said, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I said, I did, I, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, th. th. Did, th. Did, th. Did, th. Did, did, did, did, th. Did, did, did, th. Did, th. Did, th. Did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did relies on speed because I don't want to be rushed.
Okay, so randomly click on someone.
I'm just going to randomly click on one.
Go on.
They've not put an address.
What they can do?
We can email back and send us your address.
Of course you can.
I think if they haven't put an address.
Well no, let's wait.
Hang on to Chris. Chris Beaumont. Yeah, lucky Chris Beaumont. Chris Beaumont will be watching Stigmata tonight with a club of Hagendar if I'm not
much mistaken.
So he'll be loving it.
Well, under Chris.
Need his address.
Right, that's the end of that competition.
Right.
Can we play a record or something?
Well, what is this that?
Oh, God.
This one is. What is this? Go on. This is, that song's got a good story enough. Oh is this that...
Oh God. So tell us the rules. Right, the rule is that it's songs that we play on the show
every week and there's a lot of music out about that. They just keep saying the song things over here. What's it? What's the song with the story this? What's the song with the story? What's the the the the song? What's the the the the the the the th. What's the th. What's th. What's the th. What's th. What's th. What's the th. What's the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, so the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. So, oh, oh, oh, so the th. So, so the the the the the th. So, so th. So, so the the th. So, so th. So, so th. So, so to, so to, to, so to. to. to. to. to. to. to. So, so to got to listen to this. Go on. Well, do you know what it's about?
Yeah, isn't he getting trying to get back to his girlfriend?
Yeah, he's been working away.
He lives in Tulsa, but it works quite far away.
Right.
Would they save us having to listen the song?
Well it's always good to sort of... Hear the story before you hear the story. It's like, you know, you know, I like this before a film. Yeah, go on. You might read the book before you see the film, type thing. So,
never in my case. He's working, he's working miles away, his mrs. is in Tulsa, he's
driving back and he can't wait. He's here about 24 hours away and he's a little bit tired on the way home. He's thin's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's a little. He's a little. He's a little. He's a little. He's a little, he's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working. He's working, he's working, he's working, he's working, he's a little, he's a little he's working, he's a little tired. He's a little he's a little tired. He's a little, he's a little, he's thinking I don't want to look a mess for when me and Mrs. see it sees me so he says alright I'll stay at a motel get some energy in
that you know for when I see her have a shave so he pulls over at a motel
and he's locking his car up getting his suitcase out the back there's a
woman in the car park he's like oh she's all right she looks at him he think the suitcase in the boot is mentioned the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their the their their their their their th I their their the th I th is th is th is their th is th is their their th is th is their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th is the is the is the is the is theeat. toy is toy is toy is the is they. the is the is their their their the is their their th, he thinks... Sex of M. 104. I don't think the suitcase in the boot is mentioned in the song.
I think that's maybe a 12-inch mix or something.
I've not heard that.
Well, basically, right?
I don't remember. I'll play the record for Christ's sake.
Let them listen to it.
I don't remember him saying, cool, she looks all all right. Yeah, 25 I'm told to Gene Pitney's song with the story. You weren't quite upset by the lyrics of that song, aren't you?
I just think it's a bit annoying that, right? He loved this woman.
Everything's going fine, it's only 24 hours away from home.
I don't know what sort of distance is done.
But you can't wait to get home.
And all it took was some woman in a car part to sort of give her the eye.
And every, all the, all the good times he's had with his missus go out the window.
And, uh, I don't know.
That's the dangers of falling in love with a prostitute.
What I like about it though is the fact that he's writing this to his ex-girls. It's like the fact that he's like rubbing it's he up up hea hea hea hea hea hea. It's writing, hea, th. It's writing, th. It's writing, th. It's writing, th. It's writing, th. It's writing, that, that, that, that, that, like, like, like, like, like, that, like, like, like, like, like, like, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, like, like, thi, thi, the thi, thi, the thi, the thi, thi, the the thi. the her and getting off with her. We have an old while time.
It didn't take as long as he was going mental on it.
Yeah, yeah.
But did you hear the very end?
Because he's the loser, because he said, and he can't never the to'er
he said, and he can't see his old mates anymore.
Yeah. So even the next time you stop you you you you you you you he he he he he he he he he he he he he He said, he can't see his old mates anymore. Yeah, I say it.
I say it, next time you stop it the Granada Services,
on the way back from you know, Swansea,
I'd say it.
There was a song that was a bit like that by Jim Reeves,
probably about the same time a little bit before, right?
It was just called, just a hundred miles from Mary Ann, right?
And it was him and his horse going through the snow and he just turned off. He stopped at a little chef. Yeah, he's a fancying another donkey. No, but it's really sad
he just made me cry when I was little, because he got there right and he wouldn't leave
old Ben the horse and they, and then he dies in the snow. He's gone again. It's gone again, I'd get the same way with two. That I'd get the same hea, he's hea, he's he's he's got he's got he's got, he's got, he's got, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's gone, he's that, he's he, he's he, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's that, he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he. He's he. He's he. He's he's th. He's th. I'd th. He's th. I'd thirty. thirty. thirty, I'd thirty, I'd thirty, I'd thirty, I'd thirty, I'd thirty, I'd thirty, I'd thirtythat. Why not? Why not? You think I'd leave
you dying when there's room on this horse for two? Climb up here Jack we'll soon be flying
back to the rank so blue. It was just like when they were playing with the little horse
head when they were little and he was a soldier and but yeah last number one of the sixties
as well Christmas 1969 and it's of course based on truth that it's actually
that's a history lesson right there it is based on fact yeah it was a famous
person I think it was mr. chrottis and cromwell yeah it was which is not
cronwell cronwell and withson chursel yeah they lived at the same time. Yeah. Well that's it then. Is it? Yeah. Were you listening to anything we were saying then, Carl I tell you, did you understand
any of that? That me and Steve were just chatting about then? You just say that? Roll Farris
did a good song about someone who's got a good song about someone who's got to carry on a horse? Right. And what was about the stuff about the stuff, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, th. th. th, th, th. th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin, thin, thin, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th. th, th, th, th. th, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, th. Did, th. Did, th. Did, th. Did, th. Did, thi. Did, tha. Did, tha. Did, tha. Did, tha. Did, that. Did, that, that, that, tha. Did, did, did, did you saying ages not being specific. Do you like that stuff we do? Yeah. That's it then.
Not just a cat looking out a window, a dead mouse or something. You can go, come in here.
And it's just looking at the mouse it could eat. You want to press the buttons and
finish don't you? What are you going to do? Play record or no that's it?, that's it, it's ads and that's it. Okay. Great, goodbye.
Well, what wonderful ending.
That was the meaning when I was about.