The Ricky Gervais Show / An Idiot Abroad - Xfm S2E47 (July 19, 2003)

Episode Date: September 4, 2022

With the second series of ‘’The Office’’ complete, Gervais, Merchant, and Pilkington returned to XFM in August of 2002 to resume their 2-hour Saturday afternoon broadcasts. Though Pilkington...’s name was still not being used in promotional materials, the format mainly centered on his contributions with Gervais and Merchant mostly reacting to the various things Karl said and did, a format that would endure through the remainder of the radio broadcasts and podcasts, concluding in 2012.This was the longest stretch of XFM shows, running 51 weeks until August 2003 when Gervais and Merchant again went on hiatus, this time to record the Christmas Special (finale) for ‘’The Office’’.During the year, Pilkington introduced many of the show’s most notable segments including “ Monkey News”, “Rockbusters”, “Songs of Phrase”, and “The Film Thing”, among others. Karl grew increasingly frustrated with Ricky’s antagonism toward him throughout the year, and over the final few shows, suggested he did not want to continue on. Gervais and Merchant repeatedly said on air they would not return if Pilkington didn’t agree to remain with the show.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Tom, playing the heartbreakers, breakdown and that's for Carl's behaviour last week. Carl, he seems to be a little bit happier. Last week, I mean, we weren't worried about you, were. You sort of slipped into some sort of weird depression. You played placebo twice, so you weren't concentrating. I know you're going to say that me and Steve were annoying you, but, youthat's an easy excuse. I mean I think the listener can make up their own minds. So it's just like like I say you know it's like a murderer, right? It might not have done that if it was a different day if the sun was out or whatever and everything just
Starting point is 00:00:38 happened at once that whil me up. Right. So it was like a crime of passion. You'd be let off because those sort of... You'd never put yourself in a position again where you'd have two people trying to wind you up for you know the sake of fun and laughter for the public on a tinpot radio station between one and three every Saturday. You'd never do that again would you? Last week it wasn't just for the listeners. It was for you as well between 12 and one. Why? Why? You were wiring me up then? Do you know what I mean? Having a discussion? It's all right. I'm used to it. I'm used to it. I'm used to it. I'm used to it. I'm used to it. I'm used to it. I found out that I can't do this job the job anymore. I can't do tho th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that that that that that that. that. I that. I that. I thr. I'm tooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I to the. I the. I th do you forget that for the... You know what I can't? Do you know what I've got things going on in the head? Do you think when Bobby Davros had a bad day that he doesn't go on stage and give 100% percent? No but that's... Do you think Les Dennis let all that stuff get in his way when
Starting point is 00:01:35 he did that the the people in the front? Sometimes he had their then it's not a private life forget that bang okay he can do that but what I'm saying is I can't he's a professional so I was talking to Suzanne about it because you know it did get me down last week Susan's your therapist yeah saying to you know I can't do this sort of job normally what I do in a studio you know I'm took away in a studio if I'm annoyed no one in the week, you know, I'm took away in a studio. If I'm annoyed, no one knows about it, I get my head down and get on with it. I do, you tell him, go on, next, next, next, next. Right, yeah, but sorry, so, but what's your point here? So what's your point here? So,
Starting point is 00:02:10 every Saturday you've got to come here, you've never think you're a happy fella Carl they've never heard you laugh no one has ever I seriously we get emails all the time no one's ever heard you love I'm still happy you don't have to well are you you you don't look happy but anyway that's that's the problem with this job and I was thinking about it if if you're a doctor. And you're on a plane and something happens. Yeah. Even though you're on holiday. You might have to save someone's life just because you can. Next.
Starting point is 00:02:53 And I'd be thinking I'll keep quiet. Sure. I love that. See, that's one of the reasons why you didn't actually qualify. As a surgeon. Yeah. I mean, you can still still still you can you can still the the the the the you can still do your consultancy stuff. But you know you just don't actually want to knife in your hand anymore.
Starting point is 00:03:09 Brilliant. So you're giving this up, I have? Sorry, and how is a doctor on a plane comparable to this? Because it's just the same situation, do you know what I mean? He's probably got in his head. He's shut off, he's ready for his holiday. He's going to have to have a little bit of tumeigh their their tom he tape in a tho tho thi thi thi stuff, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's thin, he's to to to to to to to to to to tho, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, to to to to to to to to thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. So, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thr-a' to thr-a. So, sooooo of tummy trouble or heart attack or whatever and is he a doctor on the plane he's like... Jesus I'm not ready. You know what I mean? I've got a loose and his tie. Yeah I can't be that. But why don't understand Carl is you get paying to do this it's not like it's your holiday you know that this is your job of work. This is paying for this this is paying this is paying this is paying this is paying this is paying this is paying this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is this is the the this is this is paying. this is paying. this is paying. It's done right. Right. So when do you stop in?
Starting point is 00:03:45 When you're quitting? Well you're finishing aren't you in a couple of weeks for a bit. No, about four. Yeah, about four. Yeah, not four weeks, yeah. But you know, we're only going away for like six or seven weeks again, aren't we? Well, you don't know, do you? Well, we'll give up if you give up. Well that's a bit annoying. Why? Because you've just passed the book, haven't you?
Starting point is 00:04:07 I haven't passed the book, which is this three way, you know, you get your name in heat, you're in the title now, it's Ricky DeVeigh's Dixon and Carl Filkinton, and now you want to go, I don't want to do it anymore. Think about song on that. Don't be so selfish. Don't be so selfish. We need you. We've got nothing. Think of the control. Kings of Leon brilliant on XFM 104.9 so I'm not going to pressure on your car I know you're scared to be saying this right but um I'll tell what we do right we're stopping the show on the 16th of August
Starting point is 00:04:51 with we're gonna film the office specials okay and We'd be coming back. I don't know August September. Um, mid-October. If Carl does. Yeah Now I know that's pressure, but that's it. I I I I I I I I I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's pressure but that's it i think it is it i think this is a three-way show so you don't have to do it we can what we do because we've i know we've been approached by a couple of others what would you do it we've been approached by obviously better radio stations
Starting point is 00:05:18 I mean just think of any of the radioations you prefer to listen to, that's some of the ones that have offered us gigs. So we could toy with those. Or we stay and we see this through and we get XFM on the map. We'll get a few songs next year. I know Rick, I know you've had a passion since you started working at XFM to get the listeners into double figures. I know that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thoes. thoing. that's thoomereen, that's that's to to to to to to to to to to to th. We'll thiolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioliolioli. I's. I's. I's. I's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. thi. We'll thi thi. We'll thin thin. We'll thoooooooooooooo thi thiouou. We'll that's thi thiouou-I thiou-I hard work. Yeah. Um, so that's what you think about. So we've got what, so we've got four weeks left, and that might be four weeks forever and never coming back or four weeks for like a night week for, and that's for you to think about. So think if you enjoy the next four weeks, Carl. But like I said to you though, the reason I did this was to get that kitchen, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th is th is thi, that thi, that thi, that thi, that that that's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's that's thi's thi's that thi, that that right, builders in the flat, he's been annoying
Starting point is 00:06:08 me. Of course he has. What's he been doing? When he turned up on Monday, right? Yeah. Wonders in. And the first thing he says to me is, he said, the pub across the road, is it any good? I said, well, it doesn't matter, does it, you're working on the kitchen. Think of saying that the builder. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, probably, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's. He? He? He. He. He. He. He. He. He, thi, thi, th. He, th. He, th. He, the pub across the road is it any good? I said well it doesn't matter does it you're working on the kitchen. Think of saying that to a builder probably making conversation probably meant do they do a toasted a toasted sandwich because I got a half hour lunch break not an hour like Carl so I probably don't get a nice you know cheese and tomato
Starting point is 00:06:37 saudi said to yeah so Susan had a go at me saying, why have you said that? He hasn't even started on it yet. I cannot believe that. You're unbelievable, Carl. And you say it's us that a rude curse for this. I wasn't be rude. I just was, I just was letting him know. Do I know what were you're there for? Do I mean, I know what he was there for? I mean, I know what he was there. He was the little bald manned. Hea. He's their tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' thu. He's thu. He's thu. He's thu. He's thu. He's thu-he' thu-he'a'a' th'a' th'a'a'a' thu' thu' th' th' th' tho' to to th' tho'er-hea'er-hea'er-hea'er-hea'er-hea'er-he'er-he'er-he'er-hea'er. I'm tho' tho' tho' tho' thu. I'm thu. I's thu. I's thu. I's thu. I's thu. I's thu. I's thu. I's thu. I's thu. I'm thu. I'm tho'er's tho'er's tho'er's tho'er's tho'er's tho'er's tho'er'er's tho' man-twad insulting me? Let me just check, let me call head office. I wasn't having to go though, I mean they should have finished it yesterday and they're there now on their own. And what annoyed me is they turned up late today. Oh, don't know, Carl? I've just realized something. They're probably listening to the radio thinks. kitchen. Yeah but they don't know it's me do they? You know what I mean? No, they'd go he's got a whiny manned voice as well so is the bloke owns this place and the
Starting point is 00:07:31 bloke owns this place when I said what's that pub like across the road said well you won't be bothering that he's working on no he won't be able to put two together know it's him! And they could be listening and they're going to clean you out mate. Oh, if you are the builder working in, where is it? I won't say the address, but it's... Central London, yeah? Go mental. Have whatever you want. Obviously that, opposite that pub that you like, that you'll probably be in there now, so he won't be insulting, their man he should have been today he should have been at eight this morning which annoyed me anyway why I don't I really don't understand why they've got to start so early right yeah but he said he'll be there for eight turned up half nine right wanders in and what annoys me is he could have left all this down to the paper he had a paper the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I'm their I'm their I'm their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I their I I I their I I I I I their I I I I I I I I I I I I their I I I I I I I I I I their I their I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they they they the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they they their their the most of them take quite a bit of time.
Starting point is 00:08:26 A crossword book is not happy with just the one that's in the paper. If you're listening, if you are the builder that's listening now doing Carl's Flat, what about pissing in the laundry basket? Lonesome Day, Bruce Springsteen on XFM 104. So you realise now that the builder could well be listening knowing exactly who you're talking about. There's a chance of it, you know what I mean? Because I didn't think about it but you're right, you know, was tuned on to that. I think he did flick it on, thinking about it, thinking back.
Starting point is 00:09:12 If so, yeah, it's probably, he's probably listening now. No, he probably isn't. You probably used to about half hour if he's got any sense, he turned it to the virgin or magic or something, you know, there's there's there's there's their thi. chance. Good advice to the lift chest. Yeah. If you've got any sense, if you finish the crossword puzzles. I think, you know, according to our figures, there's a 5% chance of him listening to it. So if we want to be accurate, although he's in a house with it tune to that, so I think it puts him right up to 50% straight away. But then, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, Ricky, their, their, their, their, they, they, they, they, their, the, their, their, their, to, to, to, to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I. I. I, I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I think, I think, I think, I think, you. th. th. th. th. tha. tha. th moment. Yeah well you better hope he's not listening. Well I mean they do annoy me I'll I'm sticking
Starting point is 00:09:49 sticking by it. Yeah go on. No I'm just saying they do annoy me the way they wait you up at eight and then. Well that's when they start work. Because I to tell you I mean. I mean I they do they they they're they're they're they're the they're they're the they're the they're they're their their they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to they're they're to to they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to to the their. they're they're they're they're they're their it's like the other day when they came in I always like to test them Do you know what I mean when I had some work done on the last flat that was in right that was renting the builders were in the shower out and that They woke me up about half past seven. Yeah, right? Were you in the shower? No, no No good thing about cleaning the shower. There's never any hair down come out of work, right? Sure. And I thought, I wonder what they're doing? I wonder if they have started. So I walked back to go back in. They'd left the flat and they was outside having a Starbucks. And it just annoys me that they couldn't do that first. Do you know what I mean? Have your breakfast first then come and wake me up? So then they'd have breakfast. They've got to get their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to get their to get to get to get their to get their their to get to get to get their to get their to get to get to get to get their their their to get their they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. to get. their. their. to get their. their. to to to go. to to to their. tooome. tooomea. tooomea. tooombera. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to get me out of the flat and then say, right, let's go to have breakfast. Well they've probably got to get in, haven't they?
Starting point is 00:10:45 What for? They can put all the tools in the little lobby bit. Do you know what I mean? It just winds me up? Sure. Now the thing is, the guy today is doing the tiling. That's narrowed it for a bit, I had a cup of tea and a bacon butty, right, at a cafe and I went back and I kept it really quiet, put my key in the door and opened it really quick to see what he'd be doing and he had actually side work so fair play to him. What if he'd just been exfoliating himself naked on the kitchen floor? Yeah. I'd say that like, I'd say that, like, I'd say that, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'd the the the the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the key, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, and I, and I, and I, I, I, and I, and I, I, and I, put the key the key the key the the the the the the the the the the the the the key, and I put the key the key in the key in the key in the the the key in the key in the key in the key in the key in the the the the the the key, put the key, yeah. If you're listening, go through the wardrobe upstairs. Go through the wardrobe, get some stuff, yeah. They won't get anything. I've
Starting point is 00:11:28 put everything in places where they wouldn't think are looking for jewelry. So you're thinking that they're going to thief from you as well. Okay, so if you're listening, don't thinn't the obvious places when you're looking for the jewelry. the jewelry. the jewelry. the jewelry. the jewelry. the jewelry. the jewelry. th. to the jewelry. to to th. th. th. th. to, th. th. th. th. th. th. therea. therea. therea. thathea' that th. that that that their their their they're their they're going, I'll, I'll their, I'll that that that that that their. Go, I I I I I their. Go, I I I I I their. Go, I I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I's, I's, I's, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll th. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that their that their that their, I'll their places when you're looking for the jewelry. No, but I do things like, you know, just pop a little bit of urine, maybe in the salt cellar or something. Just do so much. I'd say what I do is I take the toothbrushes in the bathroom, just put them in the toilet, and then take them back again, just put them back in there. Leave them the biscuits to work. Susan was like, no one who had no one who had no to go maids. No, no, no, no, you weren't a tin, it was just a packet of good quality cookies. Good quality cookies. Yeah, you thought, on me down if they're anything. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:12:16 But that's what Susan always says to us, don't know, you know why's not as if you've been sort of harmed as a kid or anything. But I like the fact that you once said to us that you don't need friends, you don't like friends because they're a bit of a pain because they call you up and they want to be with you. Yeah but it's a hater a hassle. I woke up today right and I think it was on, might have been on five live or something in. I couldn't be th a th were talking about it's Nelson Mandela's birthday, 80 odd. 20,000 people turning up at his party. I thought I'm glad I'm not in. I couldn't be doing with that. 20,000 people.
Starting point is 00:12:51 Think of the carpet afterwards. I mean, a good percentage of him will put in out of Fagbuts on his carpet after after Tommy Walsh and Charlie Dimit feature is going to come back and he's going to go off. It's ruined. And what's he doing for his birthday? Carioquy? Chinese meal? A bit of karaoke? I wonder what Nelson man did his birthday party is like. Big cake? A big cake? Yeah, the first girl isn't it? Well everyone, we are the only three people that hasn't met him. I thought everyone's been in the cake. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A. A the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's their. It's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their Well, everyone. I don't know. We are the only three people that hasn't met him. I thought everyone's been in the cake. Yeah, yeah, just in case you never know.
Starting point is 00:13:31 And if Whitney calls, I'm not here. Have you not invited her? No, of the tho's. to the thirty tho'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'er. 85. Oh, well done. No, God bless him. God bless him. Oh. 85 to do. Oh. Right, a bit of songs of phrase next, then, yeah? Do you reckon?
Starting point is 00:13:51 Really? What's that one? Say in a minute. All right. Everybody says that they're looking for a shelter. Silence is easy by Star Sailer I'm XFM 104. Sorry, just suddenly struck me something. I don't know if I mentioned it before. You mentioned that you tried to catch your guy out when you came back once, you opened
Starting point is 00:14:16 a door really quickly to see what it was up to. Did I ever tell you when I was at university, I've got enormous feet, size 14, size 14 shoes. When I was at university everyone it seemed to me was wearing Dr. Martins it was like you had to wear a pair of Dr. Martins. It was the rule. Dr. Martins. Yeah so that's a big pair of Dr. Martins. That's like, that's why the myth of the old woman who lived in a shoe I think. I know people with my size shoes. Anyway, I am, I just just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I just literally, I'm, I'm, I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. thr, thr. thr. thr. thr. the the the the the the the the. the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to university. I've been there for like literally a couple of months. And obviously in that first period you're quite keen to kind of, you know, reinvent yourself,
Starting point is 00:14:47 you know, strike yourself, you know, try and give an impression of perhaps being quite sophisticated, worldly, cool, all those things that you know, you've left behind all your childhood friends. So you're trying to, you know, you know, I was doing all right, you know, I had a tie-dye shirt. I was looking good. And so I was working hard to try and seem kind of cool and not freakish. And I came back from studies once and I came in and there was a little old cleaning lady that kind of would always come in every day and clean up our halls of residence. And I came back and my door of my room was open, and there was like a little huddle of people just peering in, right? And I thought this is odd, you know, that my door is open and I'm not in there and there's people staring in the door.
Starting point is 00:15:32 And I looked in and the little cleaning lady had my Dr. Martin's on and was clumping around making it all laugh. Making all laugh doing an impression of me. That's amazing. Imagine that. Imagine the psychological scars that that has. I don't know that she's more popular than you. Yeah, exactly. And they go, come on, Maud, let's go to the JCR, and they carry her down. They go, drink, drink, drink, drink. And she goes to you, Steve, you better have that spot list by the time I come back. And you go, all right, I will, all right. But what I'm like is the fact that I'm sure that that's not part of the cleanest code. The cleaners are they don't have the keys to everyone's room so you can go through their belongings and play practical jokes.
Starting point is 00:16:09 Surely it's a kind of, you know, to trust. She must have it, you must have a wall bracket with a, with a, with a set, I went, and I'd never been before and he goes you got to wear special shoes and went alright he went um so on so he goes have you got size 14 and she went yeah I've got one pair and she put them on the table and they look like crusty honestly they're honestly it looked like the heart it was I just started laughing because they're so long and thin anyway and they're multi coloured aren't they they they're two colours and it looked like crusty's, it's crusted the clown's feet. And then this tea just went, alright, all right. Fourteen, that is big, isn't it? It is a huge size. Shoe, you're right, yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:53 And it was just the one cleaner in them. Yeah, good. Just a the prizes. Just remind us again what exactly songs of phrases because I know a lot of people that put it out of their mind week by week. It's a phrase that's you know been said on the show a few times that night. I mean you remember classics like what was what was... What was the hairy Chinese kid? Stop squeezing me head. Carl you're the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. So th. th. th. th. th. So th. th. So th. So th. So th. th. So th. th. So, th. So, th. th. So, th. th. So, th. th. So, th. So, th. So, th's th's th. So, the. So, the. So, theee. So, just just just just just just just just just just just theea's just just just just just just thus. So, just just just just just just thi's th? Yeah, there's this Hairy Chinese Kid. Stop squeezing my head. Carl, you're an idiot. You know, some classic phrases? Classic phrases.
Starting point is 00:17:29 And so you use various old-time songs and you put them all together and that spells out the phrase. Before we play that, let me tell you now, you can win. Look forward to this. What's the new album album album, the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, thu. the the the the the the the the the th. the the th, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, the the th. th. thi, classic, the thi, the thi, classic, classic, classic, the the the thi, classic, classic, classic, the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's called Buzuka. Is that? Never heard. Oh, never heard of it. The best summer holiday album in the world ever. You've got the treats on there include the Fast Food Rockers and Lance Ketchup. Yeah. I'm waiting for their second single because I don't know what that's going to be about. Sure. Is it going to be more fast food, maybe like Prattie? Pretamonjay yeah yeah lovely this is very good yeah two discs set the best of David Bowie inspire a carpet's the best of them still don't know how they
Starting point is 00:18:07 spin that over over three seasons no idea I don the we mentioned it last week the American song poem anthology that's kind of a kooky collection of songs and we've also got a couple of DVDs here Stephen King's Rose Red I've never heard of it. Straight to video. Yeah made for television. Yeah yeah. We'll never be seen at the cinema. And I know I'm sure there's a lot of nerdlingers listening so they will be loving Richard Dean Anderson in Stargate S. G1. Free inside there's a collector's car plus plus you can win some exclusive memorabilia. So I think a pair of
Starting point is 00:18:42 well. All you've got to do is listen to th th the th th th their their their their their their their like their like their like their like their like the pair of their own books. All you've got to do is listen to these like 13 songs probably to write a well-known stupid phrase. It's only seven different songs right? Well just get the most you can, just get the rough, artist or song it do right? And the phrase is about my dad's nicking from telephone boxes, right? You've got to give them a clue because they've got to get they're got they're got they're got they're got they're got they're they're got they're they're they're they're they're the their their their to get to know their their to know to know their to know what their their their their their their their their their their they're their they're their their their their their their their their their their. their their their their their their. their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I I. their their their to get. to get. to've got to know what they're listening for. It's hard enough when you know. Daddy's never going to stop robbing from telephone box. Is that it? So what are these, what are these songs then? Go on in? It doesn't matter that. Some people don't know what that's about? Do they? No. They're not. Well, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well, they, they, they, they. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well, they, they, they, they, they. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. Well, the. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. They're, the reference. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What thief. Here, email only, Ricky.Jovays at XFM.co. Let's hear it.
Starting point is 00:19:26 All right. Daddy, never got a stop from telephone. All right. Also not grammatically correct. So it's, Daddy, never gonna stop. Robin from telephone box Rubbish Unbelievable I think we just need the song that's all after yeah songs
Starting point is 00:19:52 Right From Just again? This is a desperate feature, isn't it? It really is awful. See Rick, if we took more of an interest in this show, we'd have come in, listen to that, and they're not going to pay it. We'd have said no way we do that. We've got a reputation. We've won awards. We've won major awards. We're not putting that tat out. But we're just giving the listener what they're they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're theytap out. But we're just giving the listener what they used to. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:20:28 So I think more full them for listening. Ricky.Jvays at XFM.co.U.K. X&1. X&1. Eminem business on XFM 104.9 Carl can I ask because after last week's show when you had your break down you went off to Hastings with your girlfriend stroke carer Suzanne now what does she because whenever we meet Suzanne we bump into Suzanne recently at the BBC Ricky and I she's always very nice to us very polite we have a nice little chat but I'm always
Starting point is 00:21:03 wondering what is it that she thinks of us really you know because I'm assuming you immediately go home and I. She's always very nice to us, very polite, we have a nice little chat, but I'm always wondering what is it that she thinks of us really, you know, because I'm assuming you immediately go home and win. So, but they tortured me, you saw they tortued me on air. Now what did she, what does she make of us? Did she listened to haste and stuff. That wasn't because you had like Marmite or something over your face. No, no. He was like, oh no. So we didn't talk for a bit, I just was like, you know, getting over it, thinking I'm sick of this. Right? You know, is the new kitchen really worth it and all that? I found him up, left a message after he said. You seemed a quiet when the their I I I I I I I I I I I I I. I think no one... You still doing your Samaritan? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:48 And did it ring or did you just ignore it? That's the answer machine. I think I turn it off. I left it off, don't know? I just left it off all day and that. But what does she make of us? Does she genuinely think, does she not really think? It's weird because there's no one who she doesn't really like which annoys me. Because she says to me, well she says to me, I'm the opposite, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:22:09 I'm like, oh everybody annoys you. Yeah. And it's like, well, but that's my choice, right? And that's why I don't bother getting mates and that, because it's just hassle. Yeah. But the problem is sometimes me being like that affects stuff that she wants to do so, you know, if a mate... Like see her family and friends. Well, let's not say her family or friends, but say if one of a mate's had a baby. Right? Right. I mean, you know, naming no names. So this happened? Well, I've just got to watch what I'm doing, I know.
Starting point is 00:22:45 Because of old... The builder who knows you're slagging him off and saying Nick stuff? So, you know, she's got a few mates who have had kids recently. Right. So, one of them had the kid, yeah, go on. And, uh, she wanted to go and see it, right? And she said you can come with us and I was like, you know what I feel that. Sure. You've seen one, you see them all. Yeah. They all look like Mouth. Why do I need to see another one? Right? And she's like, yeah but come and see it, you know, you get on with them. Come see him and I was like, it's a long way away. Yeah. That's probably narrowed it down again.
Starting point is 00:23:17 Yeah. Yeah. That's really. That's it's probably. That's probably. That's probably. That's probably. That's probably. It's probably. It's probably. It's probably. It's probably. It's probably. It's probably. I. I. I. It's like. I. I they's like. I they're like. I they're like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like. Like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like. I'll like, I'll like, I'll like, I'll like, I'll like, I'll like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I. I. I. I. I. I. Like. Like. Like. Like. Like. I. Like. I. Like. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll they. I'll they're like, they're. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll they're her because I can't be bothered. What did you say? You say, I'm not coming to see him, I don't like him. I'm not going all the way to Swindon. What is it, what is it? Or Birmingham or, or Cornwall? Yeah, well, you know where you are, you're working or are you working or busy? Well, you know where you are, theyme. Well, to be you're you you you you you the you you the thuu. you to to to to thu, you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to say, I'm to say, I'm to say, I'm to say, I'm to say, I'm not, I'm not, I'm to say, I'm to say, I'm to say, I to say, I to say, I to say, I to say, I I to say, I to say, I I to say, I I I to say, I I to say, I I to say, I to say, I to say, I to say, I to say, I to say, I to say, I th. I th. I thin, I thin, I'm thin, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm said, what does what, what, what excuse did you say, you're working or busy or? Well, to be fair, I was working, right? And they are nice people and stuff.
Starting point is 00:23:50 Oh, now you're backtracking because now they listen? Do they listen to the show? They might, they might do. So you know they listen to the show. So once again, you've got an anecdote where the people who you've admitted to not liking not liking not like not like not like not like not like not like not like not like not like not like not like not like not not like not their not their not their not their not. their to not. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and, and, and, their, their, their, their, they, their, they, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they, their, they're they're their, their, they're their, their, they're, they're their, they're their, they're their, they're their, they're their baby or care about them are listening to the show. Maybe you, I don't know, maybe the builders are listening once again. Nice people, I like them. Just, just sneez in the chili pot. When the kids older, I'll go and see him. You know what I mean? When it's got its own little character, as a baby, as a baby, as a baby, as a baby, as a baby. As I I, as a baby, as a baby, as a baby, as a baby, as I I I I I I I I I, as a baby, as I, as I, as I, as I, as I, as I, as I, as I the they, as I they, as I they, as I their their, as I their, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I the the the the the the the they, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't they. Maybe, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I mean, I don't know, maybe, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't they. Maybe, I don't, I don me. I know what you mean. It could be a toy baby. But you know what I know what you mean? Yeah, I know what I know what you mean, yeah, when it can start talking and you know. You know it's been playing well with it. Yeah, good toys and stuff. It's well worth going but at the moment. I'll see it when it's it's fancy. Oh yeah brilliant. Put it in a bade in a that's a good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to. Yeah. to. Yeah. to. the to. Yeah. the to. Yeah. Yeah. to. Yeah. Yeah. to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. I. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah? Yeah. But yeah, that's, you know, that's what we're talking about on that on our way to Hastings last week, you know, that's where I went to chill after the, after the Friday and that's where he decided you couldn't give 100% to the public if you weren't having
Starting point is 00:24:54 a good day like me and Steve do come rain or shine on a tia and it really doesn't kipot radio that really doesn't keep the the tha tha tha thininininin' thin'a thiiiiiiiiiii. thin'a thi. thi. thi. That's that that that really that really that really that really that really that really that really that really that really that that that really that really doesn't that really that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that thin thin' thi. thi. that thi. that thi. that's the. that's the. the. that's that's the. that's that's that's where the. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's uccinos these days. But we'll say once again on there, this is official and it's not to have pressure on you, that me and Steve are going away for a couple of months on the 16th of August to do the office special and if Carl doesn't come back, nor will we. Because I see it as a three-way they want us to come back and I know. I think maybe not the listeners though. No, the listeners don't care. They don't care who stands in. Incidentally, what frequency is mo 5.4? It's 105.4. It's 105. It's worth checking out. It's worth. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. the. It. It. the. It's. It's. the the the the the the the the the the the the the. It. It. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the.2, I think, oh, uh, Virgin's, no, Virgin's, uh, very good station. What is that? 105.8? Yeah, which is good.
Starting point is 00:25:49 Well, check press for details, but yeah, we'll watch some cable TV, there's some good stuff on. Yeah, Kiss is 100. That's easy to remember. Um, there's a new Ride album out, gentlemen. their thigh're probably quite excited. It's London's Heart, one I six point two. Um, it's released on the fourth of August and it's all the BBC sessions, all the stuff that Ry did over the years for Virgin, 105.8 for BBC and this is one of them. It's called Time for Time. I think it was fromippa who requested some ride. That's from a new compilation called Waves and it's the BBC recordings that Ride made during the 90s and I think that was originally recorded for BBC Radio 1. That's a good station.
Starting point is 00:26:42 That's a good station. That's a good station if they're interested. Radio 1. And it's the... I think they pay quite well as well. Well, I enjoyed working for them. I know we used to work for them for a period of time until we got fired for slagging off. Simon Mayo. Do you remember that? I can't quite remember it. Well we used to do this thing Marion Hobbs at night and we were getting a bit busy and so we were constantly handing shoddier and shoddier work. I used to hand it to him. A theme I know yeah and to the point where they kept going oh like every other way they go we couldn't put it out why well because it was the most offensive or it was no audible or it was twoddle or you didn't record it you know there there was things like that the that the the the that the the the the th you the th was th was that th was that thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thinnenene. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was a thin. I was a thin. I I was a thin. I I I was a thin. I I was a thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was thin. I was th. I was th. I was th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. I was. I was. I was things like that and then the I think the the straw that broke the camel's back was some some Maya had just broken the world record for DJing and we were going oh that's brilliant yeah in the air-conditioned studio with loads of scrotes getting cappuccinos for him
Starting point is 00:27:38 that's not work I'd like just to bin walls you know that's work not sitting down if he wants to break a record for work and we went off some things like I know we know we know birds who do leaster stuff to feed their smack addiction yeah that's work I want to see Mayo on his knees outside McDonald's giving a rent boy a blow job and all this sort of stuff I want to see him hanging up in some kind of leather in a torture garden with 13 bloke jizzing on him all with beards. Yeah, yeah, but why? Why aren't you still there? Oh dear. I think the producer at the time said we can't. I said we're not saying he did it, we're saying we'd like to see him do it, right? And she went, oh he's a Christian. Well the more isn't? Well we were talking earlier about friend, you say you don't like making new friends, do
Starting point is 00:28:30 you? You're kind of repulsed by the idea of new friends because it's too much responsibility. They might phone you up, they might ask you for a favor, they might need a shoulder to cry on, you don't want any of that responsibility, any of that concern........ But, but I I that, but I that, but I that, but I I I that, but I that, but I I that, but I, but I, but I, but I, but I, but I, but I, and I, and I, and I, and I say, and I say, and I say, and I say, and I say, and you say, and you, and you say, and you say, and you say, and you that, and you that, and you that, and you that, and you, and you that, and you that, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I, and I that concern, and I that concern, and I that concern, and I that, and I say, and I say, and I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, to say, to say, to say, to say, and I say, and I say, that, and I say, and I say, out of the past. Oh, pop up. It really unneres me. Because I'm constantly bumping into people who I just don't recognize. I know. I always got this urge to be polite. I can never just get, I don't know who you are. I've always got to pretend.
Starting point is 00:28:54 I look for clues when they say, must know them from so and so yeah well I went I went back to Bristol once and I remember walking to the bus stop and seeing someone I recognized from school and walking all the way to the next bus stop just so I didn't have to stand there and make conversation because I just thought I've got I've got nothing in common except the fact that we went to the same school. I was on a train station platform failure recently, any guy comes in, he goes, oh Steve, how's it going, mate?
Starting point is 00:29:32 I looked at it, Stony-Field, I had no idea it was just walk away but you never took the clue you never took so it was kind of I'd say oh yeah not bad not bad I read the paper and he go oh where you living at the moment so I tell you we need to say yeah and I'd look at the paper again oh do you still know um but that's what you know when you know they are they are they are are are are are are are are are are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they they are they are they they are they are they are they they they they they are they they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they they they they they they they they they they they they they the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they the they the they the they they the they they the they they they they they they they they they they they they they they go, oh we should have a drink and tell me, you want to go, I'll be honest, look, if I don't want to get in touch you, I had loads of opportunities. I've had every day from now, right back to the last 15 years, I could have made contact. I didn't. It's easy. Take that as a clue. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. If you are listening to this and you're perhaps, you're to know, and you're a to, and you're a to, and you're not, and you're not, and you're not, to, to, to, to, I, I, I, I, I've to, I've to, I've to, I've to, I've to, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to me, I've to, I've to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right. to. to. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to to. th. to. to to. to to to to th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. touch, do not bother. Ditto, ditto. I do not need your friends. You've got enough friends.
Starting point is 00:30:26 Better ones. Better friends. I've got a number of better friends that I prefer. The reason I've not kept in touch is because I don't really like. You've moved onwards. I've moved on. I know people now, the likes a man needs. If you have won four Bafters, then give me a bell. If you have not, kindly stay in your little, and underneath your particular rock. Because we're not interested. We have kept you out of our life for a reason,
Starting point is 00:30:56 I did not accidentally lose your number. Well I promised to send you a letter, it did not, it did not get lost in the post. Nothing gets lost in the post. Oh, yeah, yeah, th. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, th, yeah, yeah, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. thi, thi, tht, tho, tht, tho, tht, thi, thi, the' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th' th. If th. If th. If th. If th. If th. If th, if the, if their, their, their, their, their, their, their, get lost in the post. Nothing gets lost in the post. Oh, yeah, exactly. Carl, what do you think of that? That's all right. I'll stop, but I'm honest with him though, I don't see him. Do you know what I mean? I just say, I don't know you are. I can't remember you. Not bothered.
Starting point is 00:31:20 Oh, that is genius. Anyway, better darkness. Oh, wow, I've got to play this. Now, be warned. This is a rock ballad off the new Darkness album. I love the album. And that's a bit cheek because it's got shades of Death Leopard, right? But there's a lovely ballerica bit in it, and it's quite a nice song. And it's the darkness and they can get away with this sort of thing for at least another four months. Oh. Radio 1. If you want me I'm your country. Cardigans you're the storm on XFM 104.9.
Starting point is 00:32:03 If anyone from heart or magic or Radio 1 or Radio 2 is listening could well be available come October. All right? He's getting in toub I think that my new TV is too big Rick. I said that I know I was thinking but I can't believe it he talked about this buying it it got a bit of cash now of course and what is it 42 inches 42 inch plasma screen what it cost you 3 grand or something? Wow it's ridiculous 3 half grand big spender of course it's too big well I can't get far enough back in my room in my room for it you know you know you're
Starting point is 00:32:38 meant to be I think four times the screen size away from it really so that's four times 42 inches you're meant the screen size away from it. Really? To get off from the air. So that's four times 42 inches you're meant to be sitting away from it, which is impossible. Yeah. I'll have to just get friendly with the neighbours. Yeah, once it's through a hat. If that's the case though, I think you're better off just getting a portable. What? I don't understand that rule. What are you saying? Well you're meant to be four times the screen size away from the TV. But then what's the point in having a big tele if you've got to keep moving further back? Get a portable and sit right next to an e'er? Is that how they sell it? Is
Starting point is 00:33:15 that what they say to you? Well no, it's a rule films out out yet? Fair enough, he's got you there. Don, I'd tell you this though, I had it delivered and um... Are you supposed to tip delivery men? Of course you are. Well, well, if I've never had anything delivered before, I don't have anytip him. Not if it's a courier with an fridge, then give him a fiver for a drink. The problem was, I didn't realise, and I was thinking to myself, I wonder if I've got a tip him, and the guy was leaving and my mobile phone went off in my pocket and I reached him to get it, he put his hand out the tip, I went, it's just my phone. And I felt terrible after he left, I was going to do, what was I going to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do th and do th and do th and do th and do th and do th and do thin thin thin thin thin thin thin tho, I'm th and I'm thin' thin' thin' thin' thin thin the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th and I'm th and I'm th and I'm th and I'm th and I'm th and I'm th and I'm thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin' thin, I thin, and I tip, and I tip, I tip, and tip, and tip, and I thin, and thin, and I'm thin, and I'm no money, mate. I just spent it all on this.
Starting point is 00:34:06 I had to clean out my jar, everything, the drawers. Yeah, I takes me bottles back. But the problem was it took me forever to wire it in. I thought I'm not going to pay for someone to wire it up, you know. So I took me about three on when I got it wide in was Bargain hunt, I'll tell you this, David Dickinson's tan almost took me eyeballs. It was incredible. It was like, it was like x-rays. Destroy you the glow.
Starting point is 00:34:31 So close. I know, a huge plasma screen with this orange thing coming out and he doing he just turns around and takes the corner off. What do you think bargain hunters, bargain hunters, bargain hunters? Oh dear, that's why I'd buy a plasma screen to watch them. To watch Bargain Hunt. I mean it's truly because this is the problem is because you, yeah what do you watch? Have you watched? Have you watched really worth watching. because films just look amazing on the DVD on the plasma screen. You're into films and that, it's just that I only, you know, I've just got the five channels and flicking about and I'm not impressed.
Starting point is 00:35:10 I mean I can understand how more people listen to radio and stuff. Yeah. Well, when was it? When was it? When was it? When was I sort of sat down and had time because I'm always busy doing stuff on that. Sure. Moning takes up about three hours a day. When did Wimbledon finish? A couple weeks ago.
Starting point is 00:35:30 Right. I found myself sat there, right? I'm not having to go. I know we'll stop cheeky freak the week and all that, right? So I'm not going to be having a go. I'm just saying watching Wimbledon, it wasn't, you know, one of the major games, it was Little Fellers in a Wheelchair, having a game. Little fellas in a wheelchair. Right. But for me, I mean, you know, great, doing a sport and everything. Don't put it on the tele. What was up with it? What was up with it? It wasn't, it wasn't like a rally going on.
Starting point is 00:36:05 Oh God. No, do you know what I mean? Do you know normally like with the, well not to Edmund, but with some of the other players and that, they're playing for ages aren't he? It's like, oh, who's going to win this and that? None of that. It was just like, is it, net? Oh, Christ! Oh, God I don't know what to do! And people would like sat there watching it as well, when they've got other games going on in there, that's what I couldn't understand. If you've paid your money to get in.
Starting point is 00:36:34 Yeah. I mean, like I say, good on them if they'd, do you know what I mean? I don't know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I understand. There's never anything. XFM in the community. Brilliant. Anyone confirm it's I had an email earlier. Swingball? No, I'm not having to go though. Tell him. This is what I'm like. Sorry, this is recording you as well. What do you think you just said that that to me me me me me me me the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the the th. I the the the th. I the the the the the the the th. I'm the the the the the th. I'm the the the the the the their their. I'm a their. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I'm. I'm. I'm like aren't you? Sorry this is recording you as well. What do you mean I'm not going to go tell them? Do you think you just said that to me? Do you think you haven't got a microphone? You just said to London, keep wheelchair sport off the tele because they can't get a rally going? You call them little fellas in wheelchairs's just that they might think that I'm having a go and I don't want to.
Starting point is 00:37:26 That's why I stopped Cheaky Freak of the Week because some people got the wrong end of the stick. Right. And what have you? Well, it was funny that one was born with the fall of legs. They might think they were taking the Paralympics began this week and apparently what during the opening show, the entertainment was provided by Riverdance. Now I don't know, I don't know if that, I can neither confirm nor deny that, but it does seem rather tackless.
Starting point is 00:37:54 Let's play tune with Ricky Jom, exfate exfate exfm. Don't put my name to this last link. Ricky dotjavay's XFM, don't put my name to this last link. Don't put my name to this last link. Ricky Drveys XFM.K. Magic, Virgin, if you're listening, we are available probably sooner than we thought. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Making plans for Nigel, XTC on XFM 104.9. Well, you seem a little bit happier.
Starting point is 00:38:28 No? Yeah, yeah, it was alright. I'm a bit worried. Like I say, the last thing that we just talked about, I don't want people thinking, you know, we're having a guy to anyone. Because that, it does do me adding. Because I don't know when I always asked to deal with it as well when people do. What? You know we're just talking having a chat about tennis and stuff. Yeah the little fellas in the wheelchair as you put it. What you're worried about? Just that they think we're having a go on that because sometimes I do have to tech calls and deal with it all this stuff right you don't see that you don't see the hassle have to go through. No but I don't I don't often say say th say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say th say thin thi thi the the the thi thi the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I don't thi. I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi they thi they they just saying it wasn't meant to be taken badly.
Starting point is 00:39:05 Do you know what I mean? You're allowed to say you thought that the quality of tennis because they were confined to a wheelchair was poorer than say, Sam Pras versus Agassie. I don't think that's in question. It wasn't as good a game of tennis. That's what all you were saying. You weren't they shouldn't play or... It would be... Wreck the grass. Right? Well, stop! I'm just saying as well. I can confirm, incidentally, we've had several emails, I can confirm that Riverdance opened the Paralympics in Dublin recently. So I'm sure that was very good, for entertaining.
Starting point is 00:39:39 What is it then? No, I'm sure it was entertaining. They're very good. It was it the thought, was it Jimmy that thought it was short for Paraplegic Olympics? Really? I've no idea. Yeah, it's parallel Olympics, isn't it? It's parallel Olympics. Yeah. But as we pointed out, that would be pretty much, yeah. Yeah. There wouldn't be many sports in the look out, I'm educating. I'm not saying funny little fellas in wheelchair without any other grass. What? I'm always educating and I'm always telling you about stuff that I learn about and that. That you get off Ananova and it's about a monkey you became king. No? Have you got a monkey news this week?
Starting point is 00:40:18 Got a little bit of monkey news coming up. What does he do? Drive to Spain, rob a bank or get married? No, we've done all them, aren't we? We have done all them. It's a good one. It's a good one. And in fact, it's a bit related to what we've been talking about in the way. That's good. That's good. Last week after your nervous breakdown, you go to Hastings? It's so arbitrary. What do you mean? Why go to Hastings? You lost him on arbitrary?
Starting point is 00:40:46 Why did you choose that above all other places within it? It's amazing, isn't it? You look at his face when you say a word, but you know he doesn't understand. It's like when your computer freezes. Yeah, it is like that, yeah. Is there an equivalent to control alt-delete when Carl just doesn't understand so I have to press a knob, bullet, finger up my ass. It takes him out of his sort of stupid doesn't it? Now that's three things to press but we've only got two hands so... Wow! Yeah I know God what would I do? So I'd have the thumb, the thumb of the right hand and pop that the thumb, I'd th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thum, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, th. I'd have my, probably my index finger with my left hand on his knob.
Starting point is 00:41:25 How would I press his testicles? What would I use? I'd have to use some other part. Should we try it? Yeah, let's go out. Yeah, let's go out. He's just trying to give you a little kiss. Look, come on. What, I'm just gonna give you a little kiss. Just for the webcam. Right up then. All right, on the lips? No, not on. Come on. Oh, come on. I love it because he hates it so much. You wouldn't get that radio on.
Starting point is 00:41:54 But it means I could have kissed Chris Moyles on radio. What? I could have kissed Chris Moyles for all his good work. Do you enjoy that? Yeah, it's good, yeah. What happened to Chris Miles' show? Is it not on anymore? On the TV? Yeah. No. Turns out he was too fat and talentless.
Starting point is 00:42:12 Do you want to tell us about Hastings? Where did that come from? Eh? What? What's the? Not much. It's just one of them places. Yeah, yeah, I think that's what's good about it. Nobody knows, right? Because last weekend it was roasting and you saw pictures of Brighton and it was heaving.
Starting point is 00:42:35 Yeah, right? Hastings, hardly anyone there. And yeah, it's got a nice little beach. Sand? Sand? Sand. nice nice little beach. Yeah. Sand? Sandwich. No, pebbles. Well that's all right, you know, you don't want the sand. Why didn't he want to watch a little bit? It's murder building a sand castle. No, no, you just sit. You can't walk on pebbles, can you? What, what kind of,
Starting point is 00:42:54 it's sort of a bit, you know, dodgy? It's all right. The only annoying thing is, right. It's one the place is one thing thing thing thing thing them places that it's great to visit for a day, but I wonder how people who live there get by. Why? Because all the shops are like them things that you go in and it's like a little pebble with a pebble stuck on the top and it says Aston's on it. Every shop does that. If you want bread and milk, it's a murder. There must be a supermarket. I didn't see any. Seriously, it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thoes. th. their thoomerea. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. the. th murder. Yeah. There must be a supermarket. I didn't see any. Seriously, it's all novelty things like that. And then when I got back into London, they're houses, just covering pebbles and like, sea shouts and stuff. Not Rock for Tee again.
Starting point is 00:43:34 But the funny thing is right, it's the first time I sort of know it is somewhere like that. When you go, what do you do if you know what do you do if you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you know, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you know, you know, you know, you know, th, th, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi, th thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, you know, you know, th some brilipads or whatever. I'm walking in London. Never concern me that. Never need your brilliant pads in my life. No but you know what I mean? The sort of thing is that it's a bit tricky to find but in London you know you've got the coverage. Now the weird thing is I was walking on from, we went out to drink the other night right, walking down the road the road the shop and there was there there there there there there there there there there the the the the shop and the shop and the shop and the the shop and the shop and the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is the. the. the. the. throoooooooooo thea throoooooooooooooo tree. the. theeeeee an thee an the an the. the the. the thee That just sold in London, just sold chess pieces. Yeah, is that the one on Great Portland Street? Around the corner from it. Yeah, yeah. But that's, I think that's mental.
Starting point is 00:44:12 Well, I remember being in Brighton once and seeing a shop and all it sold was the foam you put inside cushions. Yeah, there's one of those, that's the phone. I know where these things are. There's a hole in the market. Yeah. What was that shop we walked past yesterday? And it was like some really, really, oh, chef uniform shop. It's Dundeen Street. I tell you what I open a chef uniform. Mainly sort of Czech trousers and white hats, but there must be a lot of chefs around. I'm eating all the time. Someone's the the chef the chef chef the chef the chef the chef the chef the chef the chef the chef the chef, their chef, the time someone's making the food. The funny thing is on the chess shop right they must not have been doing that well And someone must you know the businesses must have been sat there going
Starting point is 00:44:50 Not really working this is it? Yeah, people only buy one chest set in their life Yeah, but the funny thing is on the door. It's just said come in and browse Did you? Did you? No, it's shut, right? Yeah, but the funny. thing. thing. the th. the funny. th. the funny. th. the funny. th. th. the funny. the funny. the funny. the funny. th. th. th. the funny. th. th. th. th. th is funny th is funny th thing. th thing. thing. th. the funny thin thing. thing. th thing. th thing. th thing. th is. thin thin thin thin thin thin th. Yeah, th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's Right? The funny thing is, the funny thing is right, so you can imagine them sat there going, oh, not doing that well. And it's changed, they've actually changed the name of the shop now. And now it says chess, chess and bridge. Right, they've had to expand it up a little bit. But still. What do you buy for bridge, if not a back of cards? I don't know. I don't th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. thin thin' th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. So, the th. th. th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, the the funny. So, the the the the the the the the the the they. So, they. So, they. So, th. So, th. So, th. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's, they. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, th. So, they. So, the. So don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't think you need a lot of stuff for Bridge except a back of cards. I remember going to a table. Three friends. On holiday once in Devon passed a shop. I don't know. If you ever need it, if you ever need an antique marionette. Let me know where you need an antique marionette. Let me know where the to university to do the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to to do to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the b. the b. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. tra. tra. tra. tra. tra. tra. tra. things. thea. thea. the. the. th unless you're a collector. But I wonder who goes into this business. Well, son, what are you doing? Going to university to do law, father? Well, there's a factory there that makes the little plastic bits that goes on the end of
Starting point is 00:45:52 chair legs. Do you want to take it over from me? We're not really no. It's all set up. Yeah. It's all set up. Oh, God. All right. All all. All. All. All. All. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. the the the their. their. their. Well, the the the the the the their. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. the their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. thoo. tho. thooooooo. the. the. thoo. the. tho. tho. the the the the the the the the the to make them. I know. The little plastic bits that go on the end of chairs. Well if you make them call us on the one, two, three, four, nine, seven, three four. Weird, weird. Weird, though, right? Listen, uh, songs of phrase answers next. We'll go. I'll tell you what. Daddy can stop robbing telephone box. That is the well-known phrase. Daddy's never going to stop robbing telephone box. The well-known phrase. We're looking for the songs I think. I don't care. Well, tell me where it all went.
Starting point is 00:46:47 Liverteens on XFM 104. I'm Ricky to rise with me Steve Merchant over there is Carl Cayman Pilkers. I'd be great for Hart, wouldn't I? Virgin I'd probably... But Radio 2, I'd be my first. Oh's all one, late night one, would be good. All good stations, all professional stations. Yeah, four weeks to go, four weeks to go, before we may give up or we may come back. Who knows? It's all up to Carl, Cattie Man, Pilcoids.
Starting point is 00:47:17 Can I just extend an apology? I was a little bit crass, and I to to to about Radio 1 DJ Chris Moyles. I'd like to apologize. Funny man, Cris Moyles. I'd like to apologize for that but it gave me an idea, you the listeners, who do you hate? Email in, Ricky. Joveys at XFM. I just think that we've never really used XFM as a kind of, well as a research tool really and it seems to me that we can get great opportunity. And it's this, we don't sort of do this thing, we don't go on there and sort of like slag off other people and people in the public high. Well, we sort of, we sort of, we pick on people like Chris Morse who's got a big platform,
Starting point is 00:47:53 that can't fight. Helpless, yeah, much bigger platform. More people who can't answer back? Yeah, we want, yeah, so, um, who do you hate? That's us. Who do you hate? And we don't want, I don't want people you went to school with or your boss. Do you know what I hate, Steve? Who do you hate?
Starting point is 00:48:13 Right. No, probably Moylesy Harry Potter and Jamie Oliver. But what are your top three? Now don't make them comical, don't make them, these are the people that wind you up. When you see them on TV, if you hear them on the radio, if you see them in a magazine, they just, oh, they'll make you a kind of blood. It might be us. It might be us. their, you, you, you, you, you, you, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, tap.
Starting point is 00:48:33 the, the, tap. the, the, tap. . . . . . . the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, to, to. to. tod................................................... people. Yeah. But we just want, I want to draw the top five people. I don't want to hear things like Tony Blair and Geoffrey Archer and fascism, just people
Starting point is 00:48:49 who make your flesh crawl for no, for no thought of their own. Well, really? Well, sometimes they're own. Yeah, they're talentless or fat. But that'll be a good long, long-term poll over the next four weeks. And then, in their, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, no. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No, no, no, no, no. No. No, no, no. No, no. No, no, no, no. No, no. No, no. No, no. No, no, no. No, no, no. No. No. No. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their, just, just we're in the top ten exactly but here are the other nine so I think it's just genuinely going to be quite quite interesting so Ricky dot your base at XFM dot co dot you maybe who you hate in why it's like given a reason in the diary room yeah you got you can't just nominate someone you've got to say and why sure but if you know you can't be bothered to write and why just nominate the to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I I I I I I I I I I I I th I th I th I th I th th th th th th th th th th th th thrown. thrown th thi thrown throng and why th th th th th th th th th th th to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th they just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just they they they they they they they they're they're thi thi thi thr thr thr throoooooooooooooooooo the the the thr thi thr thi thi they just they're just we got a lot of reading to do if they start doing that Rick. Yeah. Keep it down to one sentence. Yeah. You know so the reason to be, you know, so and so because they can't walk. Something like that. Sure. Maybe. Now then, we were playing earlier songs of phrase. We have had, I mean, the answers I could literally count on the fingers of one hand. Now the right answer is even less so but do you want to play it once
Starting point is 00:49:45 more Carl? Oh God. From... From... From... There was seven songs in there. Right. Read them out. What are they? It was a... Oh, I've got a written down. I can remember them. Daddy Kill.
Starting point is 00:50:04 Bonienne. Never gonna. Because you're from Rick Ashley. Yeah. Write them down! Stop. Sam Brown. Right.
Starting point is 00:50:17 Robin was Miss Robinson By the throw by Salmon and Garfunkel. Mrs Robinson. Yeah, hang on a minute. That's not Robin. From, from Russia we love, Matt Monroe. Telephone, telephone hanging on the telephone, blondey. And then box. Living in a box. Well listen, no, I don't think anyone got them all right. If you did get them all right, I'm sorry but I gave up checking the emails a long time ago. So I'm'm going to give it to Michel Flower because she got a few of them right. So we got a lot right.
Starting point is 00:50:51 She got a lot right. Well done. She got five out of seven. So well done Michelle. And you get all those great prizes. Incidentally, we mentioned that the, Michelle. That features Richard Dean Anderson. Had a lot of emails, people saying, is that the same Richard Dean Anderson, or Dickie Anders that used to email him
Starting point is 00:51:08 and said he'd love the show? What's happening at Dickie? No, I've got heard from Dickie for ages. So Dickie, if you're listening, Richard Anderson, so. So, what's it going to say, if you're still out there, get in touch with... Anders! Anders! It was talking about, right? Hey! Anders! I just was going to say, you know you're talking about people who annoy you in that, right?
Starting point is 00:51:29 Not many sort of celebrities annoy me because I think, well, some people like them. You know what I mean? Yeah. But thinks that affect a bit of stereotyping but all the people who have met her have been builders have always annoyed me. So that's... That's because they've been working on your house in your space. I mean that's not, that's like all the builders that have been around your flat and making
Starting point is 00:51:56 a noise when you're trying to get some sleep have annoyed you. Well that, but also someone in the office in the week, right, who works there, he's a good lad, named Lenny, right, it's called Lenny. He proposed to his Mrs. Using XFM. So like he popped in, he popped in Zoe's show, right, his girlfriend sat out there, she didn't know what was going on, she was asked to come in. Even she wasn't listening and she was out there. She'd probably had a to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to the to the to the to the to the the the their to to the thi-u. He was the the the the the the the the the the the the m-uiness, the m miss the m miss the m miss the m miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss the m. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. Hea. He was that's that's that's that's th. Hea-uxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx-u. Hea-u. He was that's that's th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He's that's there. She probably had a walkman on or something. But just that chooses to Johno. He had to fax Johno with the request. Dear John I am broadcasting your mix at the moment.
Starting point is 00:52:35 My girlfriend's listening to you. Oh God, London's heart one I six by two. Great state. But it's just that thing of like abusing your position I think it annoys me. Do you mean? Yeah. Because if he, I just was thinking if he worked for a cab company, would he have done that over?
Starting point is 00:52:56 That's what I hate to people who have just sort of like, they've got there by unfair means now they're sort of hurting the like little people and that...they're sort of like hurting the like little people and that really yeah that's why hate them the most do you know what I don't like what famine no it winds me right up famine and disease oh oh it's so annoying with it tune from Wilco this called I'm the man Loves You from their album, Yankee Hotel, Foxdrop, XFM, 104.9.
Starting point is 00:53:29 Who do you hate? Ricky Dr. Jovey's XFM.K.K. All the tasks. Fascists. All thanks. I didn't want it all. Isn't that brilliant? Van Dando all my life. Beautiful on XFM, 104.9. Well, it's nearly it. It's the big one, it's what people tune in for.
Starting point is 00:53:50 They probably tune in about 10-2 these days. For Monkey News. With Carl Pilkington. Can we hear the jingle? Oh, chimpanzee that monkey news. Right, this one's about a it's been emailed into me right I haven't really had time to check it out this week
Starting point is 00:54:10 I've been busy I hope it's not stupid um goes back to 1908 and the person saying it's you know it's a good story in that the surprise they haven't picked up on it yet right uh... The Olympics, right? In 1908 in London.
Starting point is 00:54:30 Apparently it was meant to happen in Italy, but it was cancelled. Don't know why. Right? And it happened in London. Anyway, 400 meters. Right, it was meant to... There's a fella who was going to do the run, right right and the favorite to win it was this Bulgarian guy
Starting point is 00:54:46 Right right okay There's these a few things it cannot be one he injures himself so a monkey steps in and wins Two he does a drugs test it turns out that he is a monkey So if it's either of those right I'm gonna go mad so anyway so the fellow right this this favorite everyone's tho? th thinking yeah he's gonna do it gonna is he hairy is this bloke hairy so anyway so the race happens yeah and everybody's lined up ready to run and you know everyone's saying yeah he's gonna win he's gonna win then suddenly a bit a murmuring going on people going on what's going on here hmm he's eating a banana and there there's a fellow in there in in in in in in there in there there there there there there there there he he he he he he he he he he he he is he is he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was the he was the the the they was he was he was he was he was he was they was the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th is th is th is tho tho. he was tho- is tho-n is tho-n'er is tho-I' is tho-I' is tho-heeee is they is there's a fella in the lane next to him, right? It's going up, who's that? He doesn't look familiar, you know? Who is he? What is it? What? What?
Starting point is 00:55:27 Who is it? I mean, not what is it? Oh, not what is it? Oh, they're not familiar? Oh, he's not familiar? Who's he? He's not familiar? He's not that. their throwntoy. What's? He's th. What's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? Who's? What? What? What? What? What? What? What's their? What's their? What's their? What's he's their? Who's? Who's their? Who's he's he's their? Who's their? Who's their? He's their? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's? He's th. He's not? He's not? He's not? He's not? Who's not? Who's not? Who's not? Who's not? Who's not? Who's not? Who's the the the the th. Who's not? Who's th. He might not be good, he might be short anything. Does he say three foot six and he's hunched over on his knuckles? I realize it was fancy dress. Yeah. So I don't think he's going to be any good. So, so the race starts. Oh he put his finger up his ass, that's weird for a runner to do that before race. It's weird, yeah. Race starts, yeah. Yeah, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. R' th. R' th. Re, he's th. Re, he's th. th. th. th. th. thinks, he's thinks, and he's thee. He's thin, and he's thoom. He's thoom' and he's thoom' thee thee. He's thee. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's thre's thre's threa. He's threa' is threa' is threa' is threa' is throwneeean. He's threa' theree. what I mean? We have our money on the favourite, what's gone on? Who is this guy? Anyway, he's stood up there, right? He's looking well happy, he's lifting the trophy and everything. Right? Long arms, long arms, that trophy is higher than... He's only three foot but the trofe is nine foot in the air with those long. They're suspicious, go on. They have they're on. They're on. They're on. They're on. They're on. They're the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their he. He's looking. He's looking. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's looking. He's looking. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's looking. He's looking. He's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's looking. He's he. He's he. He's looking. He's he. He's looking. He's looking. He's looking. He's looking. He's looking. He's looking. He's looking. He's looking. He's looking. He's the the the the the the the the the the the the the he's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's lifting. He's looking. He's run. Oh, for a f- I'll tell you, come on. Come on, come on. It's ridiculous. Normally the shave themselves, don't it?
Starting point is 00:56:29 It's just make them faster. No. And how did he manage it? It's really airy and that. So anyway, he wins the stuff. toing. Now don't keep talking. Shut up, this is monkey news.
Starting point is 00:56:48 If you can't handle the news, it's news from 1909 and I haven't heard about a chimp winning the Olympics. Be quiet. What happened there then? 400 meters, right? Now the thing is, the thing is, the only thing is, this is, this this this this this this this this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this monkey, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this monkey is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this is, this monkey is, this monkey is, this monkey is, this monkey is, the monkey is, the monkey is, the monkey is, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey is monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, the monkey, thi., this is monkey, this is monkey for the Olympic Committee, right, to find out that it was a monkey. It was going, it was like going, like Manic. It went into loads of races, it was picking up loads of like... Don't shut up! Right? It became a celebrity.
Starting point is 00:57:12 He was doing endorsements on TV. Don't talk shit. It said he managed to win the same race four years later in Athens because... How did it's a the What is it's a joke? They're winding you up, Carl! Weird. It's not weird. Right. I do not believe it. Well, that's okay.
Starting point is 00:57:33 There's only three of them to go then. Right, because we're probably all leaving in four weeks' time, and that's other sort of Tim Pot place like this, is there? No. So I'm going to clear up me act a little bit. I've got an album from the Capitol Radio Library and it's the best punk album in the world ever so if Captain listening I'm just going to show that I can do a mainstream and play classic song and I'm going to announce it right and everything so uh if you get a job on a the the the the to do to do to do. So, okay, here we go, right, if anyone's listening, just to show that I can do mainstream radio, okay?
Starting point is 00:58:07 Well, that's all. Okay, how's it? No, no, no, okay. Okay. It's all, it's all. It's all. It's all. today. Well. the. the....................................................... to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to..........................................................................................................................................................................chant. Across the way, Cayman Pilkers. We're going
Starting point is 00:58:25 all the way back now, a classic song from the late 1970s and this is Devo with Mongoloid.

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