The Royals of Malibu - S2 E4 - "Just Sleep on the Floor"

Episode Date: September 4, 2023

Mama-Bear Brooke is in fuuuuuull swing, but Ella is determined to get some answers from her. Handling a psycho psuedo-stepmom and catching up with nearly 2-months of school work all at the same time? I could never. It's no wonder that after spending the day in full-on study mode, Ella, Easton, Savannah, and Val decide to reward themselves with a night out. The Royals of Malibu is production of Diversion Audio is association with Pod People. Featuring the voices of: Alyssa McKay as ELLA SINCLAIR, Chris Cafero as REED ROYAL, Nick Cafero as EASTON ROYAL, Armen Taylor as CALLUM ROYAL, Franchesca Agramonte as VALERIE GONZALEZ, Hannah Montoya as SAVANNAH GONZALEZ, Burgandi Trejo Phoenix as BROOKE DAVIDSON, Edgar de Santiago as ISAAC DELGADO, Maura Vincent as DINAH O'HALLORAN, Erica Dawson as MARIA ROYAL, Stephanie Sherry as LUCY and MARGARET SINCLAIR, and Jason E Kelley as PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR.Directed by Matt Sav. Written by Keyanna Khatiblou and Lindsey Ploussard. Produced by Aimee Machado, Emma DeMuth, and Jacob Bronstein. Production Management by Ashton Carter. Story Editing by Lindsey Ploussard. Story Development by Emma DeMuth and Jacob Bronstein. Editorial Direction by Scott Waxman. Casting by Lindsey Ploussard and Alex Vikmanis. Sound Editing, Sound Design, and Engineering by Michael Aquino, Morgane Fouse, and Carter Wogahn. Theme Music by Eric Zeiler featuring Carly Bond. Executive Producers: Jacob Bronstein, Mark Francis, Rachael King, Alyssa McKay, Matt Sav, and Scott Waxman.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Real quick, and then I'll shut up so you can listen to the episode, but I wanted to tell you guys about an exciting new update this season, and I promise you you're going to want to hear of this one. The Royal's of Malibu is now on Patreon. Can't wait for the next episode? Well, if you subscribe to our Patreon for only $5 a month, you get access to the newest episodes one week before everyone else. We'll also have a lot of fun behind the scenes bonus episodes, polls like our U-Team Read or Team Isaac, Q&A's, discussion rooms, and much, much more.

Scripts to future unreleased episodes will also be available for purchase. Go to patreon.com slash the royals of Malibu for early access to new episodes and much more. That's patreon.com slash the royals of Malibu. I was looking at your file this morning and I couldn't help but wonder if, given your educational history and all the class you missed, it might be beneficial for you to remediate some topics. While you were gone, I found out that Dina is contesting your trust. Dina hired a great lawyer recently, and she won't go down

without a fight. As I pull on Reed's hoodie, I catch an unmistakable whiff of some expensive women's perfume, something high-end and very mature. I am telling you the truth. The baby isn't mine, and I would never, ever hurt you like that. Fowl. Bitch, you never told me the real reason why you disappeared for two months. I respected your privacy because I am the queen of healthy communication and boundaries, but you wanted to tell me this whole twisted ass saga about re-chaining with Brooke over text at 6am?

I'm sorry, I know, but the whole situation has been both keeping me up at night and waking me up at 6am in the morning. I thought it would be easier to type it. Girl, you have to tell people these things. People in your life care about you and want to help you Oh, I'm gonna murder you. I know. I'm sorry But you were so heartbroken and I'm so heartbroken and I Don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, you know

It's okay. It's okay. Now. We know Let me do some deep breaths. Ah. Gross, stop breathing into the phone, please. Ah. I'm good. Heart readers are turning normal. Oh, wow. Read is a little... BITCH!

UGH! Okay, so recapping. You walked in on him and broke. You hate his guts. I hate his guts. You refused to talk to him, and I'll broke his back with Kyle and his mother-fucking pregnant with Reads Baby? What did I leave out?

That's the whole fucked up story. Worst spark notes ever, by the way. Why are you awake at 6 a.m. on a weekend anyway? Heartbreak is fucking with my circadian rhythms. I thought you were feeling better about the breakup. This is better. I unblocked him and called her so I could hear her apologize again. Anyway, don't distract me.

We gotta figure your shit out, stat. I seriously need your help. The stress of everything is distract me. We gotta figure your shit out, stat. I seriously need your help. The stress of everything is killing me. I fall asleep thinking about Reed. I wake up thinking about Reed. The whole reason I left Malibu was to avoid this exact feeling. Like, it's my ex for real the father of his future stepmom's baby. It's giving Jerry Springer.

But there's no way Reed not to brook, right? This shit is gonna give me nightmares. Hmm. Well, first receipts, I saw Reed with a basically naked brook on his lap on his 18th birthday. Disturbing. Yeah, there's an image I can't erase from my mind. Then I overheard Reed on the phone with Brooke during the pep rally. And what was their convo about?

I don't know, but it sounded tense. And if you un-bregnated someone who really fucking sucked when it you be tense? Facts. Oh, and then Reed let me his hoodie yesterday, and it smelled like some chicks' pricey perfume. Oh, that's gross. So gross.

But none of that is stolen cold evidence that he is the father of that embryo. You didn't see Reed's face when Kalam announced Brooks pregnant. He basically ran out of the restaurant. He looked... guilty. Look, only two people know what happened in that bedroom. Reed and Brooke. Unfortunately, you can't trust either of them. Yeah. But I can question them separately and see if their stories match up.

Okay, Detective Ella, Olivia Benson could never. Ugh, what is that noise? Maybe someone's building a panic room for me to hide inside of. I need to go see if we're being robbed by Lumberjacks. Love you. Love you. Love you. Ethan, what is going on? I don't know, but it's really... I'm not talking to you, Ethan.

I'm talking to Ethan. Guys, guys! Hey! Any chance you could take a break? Can you break it? It's a good thing I'm sober now. I would have split my head open if I had my usual Saturday hangover. You're like two-day sober. And I'm loving life.

East your sober? Ooh, the whole family's out. Sorry about the noise kids. As a spokesperson for the Teenagers who don't care committee, I'd like to ask, what the fuck is going on in our living room? It's for our new living room waterfall. Brook is... nesting.

Haha. Am I having an acid flashback? Hey, you boys need to respect Brook. I didn't even say anything. I miss this. Dad's siding with Brook. Brook acting totally insane. Me being an asshole for attention.

It's like all times. Both of you... go to your rooms. Gladly. Later losers. Whatever. Dad. I want to punch Brook in her smug, conniving face.

She's a manipulative, lying snake! Ooh, I need to win over, at least momentarily. Hey, Brooke! I've been dying for some girl time. Do you want to go for a hug girl walk down by the beach? Brooks' eyes narrow and she can see right through me. Luckily, we're both great actresses. Ah, Ella, girlie.

I would love to. Let me go grab my crossbody. Am I finally going to get some answers about read and what happened between them? Or will I just uncover more betrayal? Hey, my name is Kobe Bryant. I love to play basketball. Check out the podcast, I am Kobe, the story of Kobe Bryant's early life, with never before heard intimate tapes of Kobe himself from his teenage years.

His thoughts, his dreams, his goals all revealed for the first time. Listen to I Am Kobe on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts. Listen to his voice. What the hell kind of game are you playing, Brooke? Wow, you're coming in a little hot. I was going to try to keep my cool, but I can't. I can't do it. Why would you to try to keep my cool, but I can't. I can't do it. Why would you do this to me?

To-to-calum to everyone? Honestly, I prefer we don't discuss it. The past is the past. I've personally moved on. Are you kidding me? It's not good to dwell. Ella. Stress causes breakouts.

And for what it's worth, I think you should be thinking me. I told you that the royals couldn't be trusted, and I showed you just how easily Reed's head can be turned. You slept with my boyfriend! Who is also your fiance, son? You are a psycho! I don't want you to little teen heartthrob, ew! I wanted Kalimbaq and I got Kalimbaq. You slept with Reed to get Kalimbaak?

Please make that make sense. Ugh, I did not sleep with Reed. I mean, I guess I would have if I had to, but it didn't come to that. I wanted to show you the truth, Elle, that you can't trust these royal boys. And I needed to win Reed over to my side so he'd help me win back Kalim.

I figured seducing him was the easiest way to make that happen. You really didn't sleep with Read. Why would I lie? Because you are completely insane! Volume! Ella, do you want to be seen yelling at Callum Royale's pregnant fiance? No. No.

Better to keep things copicetic between us. You've been doing a great job of not looking like you want to kill me in my sleeve. Why are you doing this? Why don't you just leave? I'm gonna be a mom, Ella. Once I found out I was pregnant, I was completely shocked for one thing, but I knew right away that I had to stick up from my unborn child. I felt like an outsider in my entire life, okay?

I was raised in a trailer park and these Malibu snobs made me feel even more inadequate. I never felt like I belonged here or like I was good enough to be a royal, and I refused to let my baby girl feeling like that. I don't want my child to feel like they aren't good enough and Callum the Weekend Dad wasn't going to cut it, you know? My baby needs married parents so I did what I had to do and I don't care who got hurt. Why did you call Reed during the pet rally? What were you arguing about? Reed is

helping me smooth out some wrinkles in my relationship with Kalim. Read is helping you. Yeah. He's playing Cupid. Ella, can I ask you a question? Oh my God, what? No matter what I tell you or retails you, are you ever going to forgive that betrayal? I mean, can you really trust Reed ever again?

I don't know. So it's... better to move on. Isn't that what you were trying to do by running away to San Fran? I guess... I know you hate my guts, but I'm sure we can agree that... you and Reed being broken up is...

for the best. Why the hell would I ever listen to advice from you? Maybe because I'm sure we can agree that you and Reed being broken up is for the best. Why the hell would I ever listen to advice from you? Maybe because I'm right. I get it, okay? I'm the evil stepmother. But I do hope that eventually we can be friends again. Yeah, absolutely fucking not. Okay.

Well, then fair warning. If you try to tell Calum any of the icky things from the past, I am not afraid to go full Mama Bear and ruin your fucking life. I did it once before, remember? I don't actually know if I believe anything Brooks says. Maybe she really didn't sleep with Reed? Ugh, I don't know. For now, I decide to play nice-ish. If I can convince Brooke I'm not a threat, she'll eventually let her guard down. And then maybe I can find a way to get her out of the royal house for good this time.

So I decided to stay in Malibu, at least until I graduate. Ella, what the hell didn't you call me? You were out there on your own? I don't know, Lucy. Sometimes when I get freaked out, I just don't want to need anything from anyone. Wow I hope you grow out of that. I was wondering if I could maybe have my old job back. I really miss this place. Ella, you're about to be a multi-millionaire. You don't need a paycheck. You need to learn how to stop being a mini adult and start being a kid. Don't you have a school dancer?

Something to worry about? I don't want to be a spoiled rich kid like everyone else at the Cove. I want to work with you and be with the people here. Nope, no can do. I refuse to enable you. Lucy, please. You can come out here whenever you want, but I'm not rehiring you. You need to focus on school with your friends and learning gonna be your regular kid.

Now I gotta go do payroll in the back, but when I look over here, you better have those textbooks open, Missy. Okay, okay, geez. Thank you. Bye, Lucy. See you later, kid. In less than two weeks, I'm expected to be caught up on the two months of classes I missed. And if I fail those exams, I'll have to repeat my junior year.

It's a good thing the Cove doesn't have extremely rigorous college-level academics that are pretty much impossible to learn on your own. Oh, wait. Plus, I can barely focus on anything while my conversation with Brooke repeats on a loop inside my head. What are you guys doing here? It's Eastern and Savannah to the academic rescue, clearly. We're here to help you study.

How did you even know I was here? This is pretty much the only place you ever go. Plus, you tagged your location on Instagram. So millennial. Look, I know I agreed to let you to help me, but it's really fine. I can just not sleep for the next two weeks. Ella, I get that your status as an orphan

has given you weird hangups about asking for favors. So too harsh, Savannah. Not too harsh. Ella needs tough love because this is no longer about Ella It's about my college applications and the community service hours I need to maintain my role as president of the National Honor Society You might even make it into a personal essay about how I so graciously helped a disadvantaged student achieve success So don't think of it as a favor. Does that make you feel better? Wow! Yeah, it really does. Like, a weight has been lifted.

Plus, Eason will completely fall apart if you get held back. I won't fall apart. Look, you were there when Eason's last bender landed him incapacitated in my shower, yes? Okay, okay, look. Savannah and I are neck and neck for valedictorian, so we know our shit. Savannah takes really good notes, and I'm a natural born genius. You are not smarter than me. Okay, fine. Let's just get this over with. Are these your notes?

Eason's too cool to take notes, so those are mine. Of course. We got a couple weeks to catch up on two months of material. Should be easy peasy. Ella, you're not stupid, right? Because this is going to be really hard if you're stupid. Oh my god, I'm not stupid. Jeez, I was just asking!

Let's start with a pilot. The raretis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows that rise with mass M falls into an instant to block X, which is a countless such a way that they can be modeled as a cone that maintains a conical shape as a D creeps across the world, joined in the Bretton Woods conference to create the IMF and the World Bank in responsible revenue-related negative. After the total revenue is maximized, T-R-D. Ugh, Ella, I'm so glad you're a transfer student, because if you had been competing for Validictorian the past three years, I would have had to kill you. Steady Sessions over, nerds!

It's time for the most important part of studying. Positive reinforcement. What does that mean? We're gonna go party! I'll be D. Are sober people supposed to go to bars? This is more of a dry January sober. Less of an A.A. sober.

It's more fun. Oh, hey, Ella, just a heads up. Reid's probably gonna be at the club too. I know you two are weird, so I didn't want him to be sprung on you. Totally! No worries. But, um, thanks. I'll never admit it, but a small part of me is actually excited to go party in Malibu, and an even smaller part of me is excited to see Reed.

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every week. Listen to Warwick Weens on the IHunt Radio F, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. One, two, the things you do in your room when you're all alone. Before you want more, what would I become if I was a friend? Crush is a huge beach-themed outdoor nightclub full of rich young people in their tightest ripped jeans. Ella, you look so hot! Ooh, we're gonna tear shit up!

You and me single ladies, womanizers, we're gonna tear shit up! You and me single ladies! Women and hikers, we're in our whole face now! Ooh, nope! Beelings allowed! Okay, okay, fine. No feelings allowed. And within 15 minutes, Val finds a tall blonde chick to make out with

on one of the couches in the corner. You're so beautiful. Are you a model? A drink full of my lady and a drink for my other lady. Thanks for letting me third wheel you two all day. But as the night progresses, Easton and Savannah get more and more hands-y until I figure out it's probably best to leave them to do their thing. I'm gonna go and uh...

Okay! Bye! Yeah, bye. I thank you. Thank you. I'm actually a service by you. Excuse me! Excuse me.

Thank you. God, I kind of hate clothes. Um, hi! Can I get another one of these? What? I'm thirsty! And bored out of my fucking mind! Hi, me again! What more please, actually? Coming right up. You calling in Uber already? It's not even midnight! No, now that you're here, Reed, I am definitely out. Oh, come on. You can hate me, but it shouldn't ruin your night.

I know you want to dance. Come on. Come here. Reed gets close to me and he's staring at me so intensely. It makes me want to tease him a little, so I wrap my arms around his neck. It feels so familiar, so comfortable, and the buzz definitely helps. You smell good. Thanks. I want to kill, read, or devour him, or something. I turn my back to him and push up against him. His hands find their way to my hips. Fuck your body is making me crazy. Yeah, did you miss me?

I missed you every day. Then reads as the thing you never want to hear from an ex. Can we talk? Wait, I killed my buzz, Reed. I'm sorry, I just... I really want to clear some things up. I can't deal with this. Okay? I don't want to talk about it, and I definitely don't want to hear any more lies. I'm out of here.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, you alright? There, you got you. Don't fall. Don't, don't. I'm gonna drink some water Fuck off Breeda you're so condescending You can't even walk straight Here hold on to me I can take you home I'm fine not it's the shoes not me

Chunky platforms are not exactly dance for friendly Alright come on let's go Ella I got you Alright, come on, let's go. Ella, I gotcha. Reed, fucking let's go of me! Alright, I don't want you to fall. What are you doing getting wasted at a club by yourself? No.

You don't get to come to my rescue, Reed. And you don't get to ask me how many drinks I've had or feel sorry for me because I'm alone at a lame club? You broke my fucking heart, Reed Royal! I am doing everything I can to keep myself together, but you appearing out of nowhere trying to act like Prince Fucking Charming is some sick shit considering what you did. Can I just explain- No! No, you cannot explain!

I am like a walking emotional mess, and I thought I would come back here and you'd be the same! I thought I would see you drinking, fighting, flanking all your classes, and now that I'm actually back in Malibu, you've turned into a model fucking citizen! You're apparently doing great! So good for you! I am super, super happy for you that you're able to keep your shit together, but I'm obviously not. I just want you to leave me alone. I'm not holding it together. What? I'm pulling apart, Elle.

I think about you every minute of every day. I'm sick to my stomach over what happened. The only reason why I've been staying out of trouble, focusing on school and sports, not fighting, is because of you. Because I wanted to prove that I can be better for you. Brooke told me you were helping her get back with Kalim. Why would you ever help her if you wanted anything to do with me?

I'm not helping her by choices. What does she have a gun to your head? Yes! Though I... It's complicated. It seems pretty simple. Do you want to listen to what I have to say or not? I don't!

I... I can't. I can't have this conversation. I can't even listen to the words you're saying. Everything makes me so, so mad. Okay. Okay. That's... that's okay. It's okay, now it's not a good time.

You're not in the right mindset. Definitely not. Let's just drop it. And we can try to get along since we're stuck in the same house, at least until you graduate. But I don't want to talk to you, Reed. Okay, it hurts too much.

I'm so sorry, Ella. I almost believe you. Can I drive you home? We don't have to talk. Fine. Hang on, just let me chug this $18 drink. Do you really think that you should? Don't judge me.

I'm not judging you. I can't get my shoes off. Those drinks really hit you on the way home, huh? Shut up. Sorry. We're not talking. I'm not gonna talk. Help me a zip. Here. pajamas. I can't sleep in my makeup.

You want me to wash your face right now? My makeup wipes in my purse. Here. You do it. I don't know. What? Sorry. Here. You do it. I don't know how to take makeup off.

Just rub my face. This is so weird. Okay. Is that hurt? Am I doing alright? Yeah, you're doing fine. I don't like poke your eye. Okay.

I did my best. I look like a raccoon. Good job. Can I know? Wait. Yeah? Can you stay? I thought you didn't want me around. I don't.

But I also don't really want you to leave. Just sleep on the floor. The floor. Okay. You comfortable down there? Yeah. I know it's weird. If you a minute, Calum. Get under the bed. Wake.

Okay, I'm dressed. You can come in. Oh, you're sleeping in. Sorry if I will give. You're good. What's going on? I just want to remind you, when we have a meeting with my lawyers afternoon to talk about Dynas lawsuit. Awesome. Can't wait. Well, this is important.

I'll be back with an Icai bowl for you in about 15. Wow! A smoothie bowl is almost solid food, Calum. It's full of nutrients. I'll be right back. Reed, coast is clear. Icai is surprisingly good for hangovers. Thanks for the tip. How do you think my dad would react if he knew we were together?

Reed. Hypothetically. Reed, we're not getting back together. I need to focus on school and now this lawsuit. And honestly, I don't think I could ever trust you again. No matter what you say. Nothing happened between me and Brooke. I don't think I could ever trust you again. No matter what you say. Nothing happened between me and Brooke.

I don't believe you. I know. I know. But I'm not done fighting for you, Ella. I know I fucked everything up. But I also know that I am gonna prove to you that this is not over between us. And when he says that, I don't know what to say. My heart and my brain are thinking too

completely different things. I know, read betrayed me, but part of me still wants him. Is there any chance that his explanation is really the truth? Or am I being set up to have my heart broken again? I don't know what to believe. Or who? I said baby, I'm not feeling it lately, but I hope we can be friends, don't you? You said maybe things weren't so crazy, I could love you like I used to do. On the next episode of The Royals of Malibu, yeah, I'm jealous Reed has that all figured out now. I mean, Princeton makes you an offer to play Waterpullo, it's a no-brainer.

Princeton? Like, New Jersey? My lawyer would kill me if she knew why we're here. Oh, you're so fine. I turned out the security stump, so this is totally incognito mode. Reed looks like a completely different person in the water. But every so often, he'll sneak a look up at the stands. I wonder if he wants to know if I'm watching.

We can tell secrets? Sure. Tell us a secret. I gets Easton before she loves out. The Royals of Malibu is a production of diversion audio in partnership with pod people. Starring Alyssa McKay as Ellison Claire. Chris Cafferro as Reed Royale Claire Chris Cafferro as Reed Royal Nick Cafferro as Eastern Royal Armin Taylor as Calum Royal Francesca Agramonte as Valerie Gonzalez Hannah Montoya as Savannah Gonzalez Burgundy Trejo Phoenix as Brooke Davidson

Edgar Day Santiago as Isaac Delgado Moira Vincent as Dina O'Halloran. Erica Dawson as Maria Royal. Stephanie Sherry as Lucy and Margaret Sinclair. Jason E. Kelly as private investigator. Directed by Matt Sav. Written by Kiana Kati-Blue and Lindsay Plussard. Produced by Aini Machado.

Emma D. Mew. And Jacob Bronstein, production management by Ashton Carter, story development by Emma D. Mewth and Jacob Bronstein, editorial direction by Scott Waxman, casting by Lindsay Plussard and Alex Vickmanis, sound editing, sound design, and engineering by Michael Aquino, Morgan Fouce, and Carter

Woven, dialogue editing by Adam Riemanda, theme music by Eric Zyler. Associate producer, Shay Wodez. Consulting producers, Chris Cafferro and Nick Cafferro. Executive producers, Jacob Bronstein, Mark Francis, Rachel King, Alssa McKay, Matt Sav, and Scott Baxman. For more information, visit diversionaudio.com. The city of Hayao can't miss my movie She'll be right up on the mountain now We're here, I'll hide you with this carbon You're thinking of your own Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

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