The Scathing Atheist - 246: Caffeinated Edition

Episode Date: November 2, 2017

In this week’s episode, Roy Moore isn’t sure if gays are people, House Republicans hope to pass a Morning After Bill that describes when a woman's right to choose comes to an end, and the President of the Australian Skeptics will be here to convince us that his country isn’t gonna kill us. To make a per episode donation at Patreon.com, click here: http://www.patreon.com/ScathingAtheist To buy our book, click there: http://www.amazon.com/Diatribes-Godless-Misanthrope-Scathing-Presents-ebook/dp/B00J53FZFI/ref=sr11?ie=UTF8&qid=1396141562&sr=8-1 To check out our sister show, The Skepticrat, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/the-skepticrat To check out our sister show’s hot friend, God Awful Movies, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/god-awful-movies To check out out half-sister show, Citation Needed, click here: http://citationpod.com/ Guest Links: To learn more about Skepticon (and get tickets to see us live), click here: https://www.thinkinc.org.au/skepticon-australia/ To check out the Podunk Polymath Podcast, click here: https://www.facebook.com/thepodunkpolymath/ Headlines: NZ PM sworn in without a bible or any religious nonsense: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/progressivesecularhumanist/2017/10/no-god-no-bible-jacinda-ardern-sworn-new-zealand-prime-minister/ Stephen Anderson: Veganism is of the devil: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/27/christian-hate-pastor-veganism-is-a-substitute-for-biblical-morality/ P-Robes wants Trump to shut down the Mueller investigation: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/31/pat-robertson-trump-should-shut-down-the-entire-mueller-investigation/ Linda Harvey credits ouija board from saving her from gay halloween: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/26/linda-harvey-my-childhood-ouija-board-saved-me-from-homosexual-halloween/ Legal to deny service to anyone you think might be gay in MIssissippi https://hornetapp.com/stories/mississippi-anti-lgbt/ Ken Ham says atheists want Christianity outlawed: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/30/creationist-ken-ham-claims-atheists-want-christianity-outlawed/ Roy Moore: Marriage Equality is worse than slavery: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/progressivesecularhumanist/2017/10/roy-moore-marriage-equality-worse-slavery/ Federal court rejects Trump’s trans ban: http://religionnews.com/2017/10/31/us-court-bars-trump-from-reversing-transgender-troop-policy Pet Expo cancelled because accountant thought COO was the antichrist: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/27/pet-expo-canceled-after-accountant-tries-to-kill-companys-anti-christ-coo/ This Week in Misogyny: New GOP bill would ban abortion before women even knew they were pregnant: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/28/new-gop-bill-would-ban-abortion-before-many-women-even-know-theyre-pregnant/ Portuguese judge cites bible, releases man who beat wife with spiked bat: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/25/portuguese-judges-citing-bible-free-suspect-who-beat-ex-wife-with-spiked-bat/ Saudi Arabia takes more steps towards gender equality: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2017/10/30/saudi-arabia-takes-another-big-step-toward-gender-equality/ God Awful Mini: To check out the ridiculous Mormon video we reviewed this week, click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RGnEJRkIDA

Warning, this podcast has bad words in it. Don't tell mom. This week's episode of The Scathing Atheist is brought to you by Stamps.com and by The War on Christmas. Halloween's over, so it's time to ruin the lives of Christians with red cups and the word happy. Let the preemptive strikes begin. And now, The Scathing Atheist. strikes begin and now it's skating apes i'm chris from the podunk polymath podcast and we did in fact evolve from filthy monkey men unless you're from the south in which case we didn't come from no damn apes It's Thursday. It's November 2nd.

And we're just as pissed off at God as you are. I'm no illusions. I'm Eli Bosnick. I'm Heath Enright. And from New York, New York and secret lair, Pennsylvania, this is The Scathing Atheist. On this week's episode, Roy Moore isn't sure if gays are people. House Republicans hope to pass a morning after bill that describes when a woman's right to choose comes to an end. And the president of the Australian skeptics will be here to convince us that Australia isn't going to kill us.

But first, the diatribe. On Tuesday, the world gathered in commemoration of the 500th anniversary of the Protestant Reformation. And as the web of Protestant sects bask in the afterglow of that milestone, I think it's important that we rationalists piss on it a little bit. So here's the story they tell. It's one of the most iconic stories in the history of Western religion. Martin Luther, a plucky small-town monk, grew tired of the festering corruption of the Catholic Church and defiantly strode through town hammering nails in one hand and his complaint in the other. As the town folk watched, he walked up to the castle church in

Wittenberg and nailed his 95 theses to the door, thus sparking a worldwide religious realignment that would sap the power from Rome and put it back in the hands of the people. In that single act of defiance, Luther paved the way for the Enlightenment and began the slow process of wresting power out of the greedy hands of the papacy. And, of course, virtually every word of that is bullshit. Now, that doesn't matter much to Protestants because their religious and historical accuracy has long been a fickle mistress for the faithful. But we value facts. So let's shine a light on a couple of the details here. First of all, Martin Luther almost certainly never nailed the 95 theses to the church door at Wittenberg or anywhere else for that matter. And this isn't a he would have used pace kind of quibble here, although he almost certainly would have used paste.

This whole event is just a fucking fabrication. Now, I should ratchet down my confidence level a bit on that because I'm no historian and there are legitimate historians who think this happened. But there's also a hell of a lot who don't, and they tend to offer up better evidence. Like, for example, the fact that this story wasn't recorded until after Martin Luther's death, and when it was, it was by a guy who claimed to be an eyewitness, but was later proven to be nowhere near Wittenberg that day or that year for that matter. And it's not like Martin Luther wasn't a fan of writing shit down. Why wouldn't he have written in something about having done this somewhere in the 30 or so pamphlets that he cranked out in the three years

after it? But beyond that, it just wouldn't make any fucking sense for him to nail a do something note to the church door. Martin Luther wasn't looking to create a schism. He considered himself a good Catholic and didn't want to get excommunicated. He wanted reform, sure, but he almost certainly would have been trying to keep it quiet along the way so that's misconception number one but number two is way more nefarious see the whole origin story of protestantism relies on the idea that martin luther was rebelling against the corruption of the catholic church and that's partly true in the sense that he was rebelling against part of the church's corruption specifically the selling of indulgences now granted the idea that the vatic's selling fast pass tickets to heaven is pretty

fucking corrupt. But if you or I went back in time and observed the early 16th century Catholic church in action, I feel like selling indulgences would be pretty low on our list of abuses. This is basically the heyday of the church burning people alive for thinking wrong. They were just wrapping up the Spanish Inquisition. And Martin Luther didn't seem super worried about that kind of shit. Instead, he was quibbling about theological minutia. And if you look at the types of corruption he was really getting up in arms about, it's fair to say he wasn't so much

against corruption as blatant corruption that even the lay people couldn't easily overlook. Right. So this heroic image of Martin Luther as a stalwart against malfeasance and licentiousness requires a radical reinterpretation of morality. He was a Catholic worried that the guys in charge were fucking up the good thing he had going. So that's misconception number two. But there's one more I want to draw a bit of a circle around, and it's a lot more sinister than the other two, because both of those are just a typical hero worship style shit that happens anytime there's a movement right they're the natural byproduct of the same shit that has republicans that today suck and ronald reagan's dick despite him running the most corrupt presidential administration in the pre-trump era point being it can happen without malevolence right it just happens that these historical figures get lionized that's not so

much true for this third one because it's worth asking why this story exists, right? If it never happened or at the very most generous, if there's no contemporary record of it happening and no strong evidence that it ever did happen, why is it so ingrained in the minds of so many people? If it's purely an invention, why was it invented? Well, to answer that, you need to fast forward to the 100th anniversary of the movement. This is 1617. Europe's in the run up to the 30 Years' War, and a local Bohemian ruler wants to drum up some Protestant solidarity right before the Catholic Habsburgs come through and murder the fuck out of them. So he cooks up a historical event and says, hey, guys, look, this shit happened 100 years ago tomorrow. Let's all us Lutherans gather together and celebrate.

a hundred years ago tomorrow. Let's all us Lutherans gather together and celebrate. Now, whether or not they think that the whole castle door thing ever happened, the vast majority of historians agree that there was very little talk about it before the Reformation anniversary of 1617. So in all likelihood, it was a piece of propaganda

meant to fire up some soldiers that were about to die. The anniversary was actually used for the exact same purpose a hundred years ago when the 400th anniversary rolled around. And that would have been, by the way, the end of World War I, right about the time the Germans needed a national figure to rally around. And it didn't much matter that most of the major powers they were fighting against at this point were also Protestant. The German government used the lie about the door nailing as a symbol for German courage.

See, the whole story of Martin Luther nailing the complaints on the church door isn't any old lie. It was cooked up to help kill people. It was a pernicious lie then and it remains one now. The church would love to sell Martin Luther as a high-minded reformer because the more they glorify the man at the top of the pyramid, the less likely you'll be to notice the stack

of corpses he's standing on. They're talking about you, Jesus. Interrupt this broadcast and bring you a special news bulletin. Joining me for headlines tonight are two rebels without a cause heath enright and eli bosnick fellas have you considered maybe uh prostate cancer awareness okay don't stick your finger in people's butts at skepticon without asking bring awareness to prostate cancer make up your mind dude you could run for president on that. Eli Bosnick, at least I

was checking for cancer too. Right? Matt Dillahunty went right to the doctor after that. Right to the doctor. Yeah, okay, but I don't think that's why he went to the doctor. Irregardless. Obviously, we need a minute to set up a super PAC and a legal defense fund,

so we're going to pause for a quick word from this week's sponsor, Stamps.com. All right, guys. Looks like we're all packed. Does anybody need... What is that? Oh, you mean Kangi? Yeah, we love this guy. We are not going home without him.

Ah, Kangi! Right? Look, guys. I know you loved Australia, but you cannot ship yourself home a kangaroo why not it's kinky it's too expensive we're gonna have to wait in line at the post office it's gonna be a nightmare oh noah don't worry about that because we're gonna use stamps.com stamps.com yeah stamps.com brings all the services of the u.s postal service right to your fingertips you can buy and print official u.s postage for any letter any package any class

of mail using your own computer and printer yeah but shipping a kangaroo yum and stamps.com makes it easy they'll send you a digital scale automatically calculates exact postage and stamps.com will even help you decide the best class of mail based on your needs. No need to lease an expensive postage meter, but they saved us like 50 bucks. Maybe 100, maybe 100 bucks. How do you get the kangaroo to stand on the- Okay, I mean, I use Stamps.com because their easy-to-import template makes sending our Patreon rewards a breeze, but I also use it to, like, ship my comics when I buy and sell them, and now I'm using it for Kanky.

Kanky. And our listeners can try this? Sure. Right now, they can enjoy the Stamps.com service with a special offer that includes a four-week trial plus postage and a digital scale without long-term commitments. Just go to Stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage, and type in scathing.

That's stamps.com and enter scathing. Stamps.com. Never go to the post office again. All right. The kangaroo can live with us. Yay! But you guys are cleaning up after him. Eh.

Hmm. Eh. Maybe. Stamps.com does not deliver kangaroos. Maybe you clean up. We'll make a chart. And now, back to the headlines. In our lead story tonight, New Zealand is a lovely country that scores well in terms of health, education, economic freedom, and quality of life. More than just gorgeous mountain vistas and breathtaking oceanic views, New Zealand also boasts a thriving dairy industry, a strong national commitment to renewable energy, and a national rugby team that is often cited as the

greatest team in any sport of all time. And if it sounds like I'm just sucking up to New Zealand because Donald Trump is my president and I fear for my national future, that's okay because that's exactly what I'm doing and New Zealand won't give a fuck because they have to take the ask us and where they can get it transparently self-serving or otherwise. I'm just saying they may let me in to Hobbiton for money, but getting me out

will take a whole lot more. Just Eli running around Hobbiton naked. Got your ring. can't see me got your ring blam side tackle by a hobbit it's gonna be fun i'm looking forward to this but not being led by a sociopathically self-absorbed idiot isn't all that new zealand has to offer the potential atheist migrant on october 27th for example they swore on their newest prime minister's jacinda ardern and she became the first PM in the nation's history to do the ceremony with no Bible and no references to God. Hooray!

Ardern is an ex-Mormon who left the church more than a decade ago over the refusal to support LGBT equality. She now describes herself as agnostic because she didn't want to make it too easy on me here. Oh, agnosticism. Code for atheists the way family values is code for gay. Or, sorry, you sexually assaulted someone. Either or. Oh, Jesus Christ. I guess that's now a thing. Yeah, gay, sexual.

It's interchangeable. Maybe Harvey Weinstein should come out as straight on Twitter. Make things better. I wonder what that conversation with his publicist would be like would be like veto and now look I don't want to objectify New Zealand's prime minister

just because she's a woman but it seems like it'd be a bit of an oversight not to at least mention that she was crazy hot I'm just saying if the plan was to hook her up with Justin Trudeau and make a hyper gorgeous class of predestined world leaders, I wouldn't be 100% against it. Just a trilingual gang of baby super atheists winning handshakes with old men. Hell yes.

Please. A headshot of him on my ceiling. And in they're coming for our Halloweenies news tonight. And in they're coming for our Halloweenies news tonight. Mission America founder and 100% fucking crazy person Linda Harvey took to World Net Daily this week to let us know that were it not for religion, she'd be getting the help and care she so sorely needs. In a screed whose first draft I can only imagine was written in her own feces on World Net Daily official website of things for homeless people to scream at you on the street. Miss Harvey took on everything from Playboy's upcoming trans centerfold to the secret LGBTQ agenda behind Halloween in America. Honestly, it is worth reading the entire thing.

We could do an entire podcast called God awful things Linda Harvey wrote Down, but I'll put out a couple highlights. First person that says patriarchal gets an Adderall shoved in their eye. Sorry. Sorry. I'm getting ready for Australia and it's been a rough couple of weeks. Okay. But what do I say to get it shoved in my nose? In my experience, hey guys, why don't we get a month ahead on shows while we're away in Australia? Worked for me. Thanks, Alan. Hope your midterms and middle school go well.

Okay. Back to Harvey. First, her proof that Halloween is a plot to turn everyone gay. Quote, America's recent exaltation of Halloween as a festival, second only to Christmas, owes a lot to promotion by homosexuals and their new favorite comrades, gender-confused males and females. Jesus. It's going to be Christian parents all over the country

just breaking open candy bars. Is that a dick? I thought I saw a dick. Okay, if Johnny gets any dicks, we trade that one with his sister for her vagina ones so they don't have the wrong stuff in their candy. Baby Anderson Cooper just has four candy bars in his mouth.

What? I like candy. She continues. I don't know why I chose Anderson Cooper. Why was it him? If you picture like a white haired kid, it makes it better. Makes it way better. Makes it way better. She continues.

And as usual, the LGBTQ folks have no problem using any tool, Halloween included, to corrupt children. Last fall, a homosexual website featured an article about a nine-year-old boy dressed as a drag queen, a transvestite,

with the help of his gay uncle. I love that she clarified. I also love that gay uncle, the word gay is in quotation marks there. I mean, I know that's a weird thing to obsess over in this Time Cube-esque rant, but what is she trying to imply with the quotes? That the kid's uncle secretly loves the pussy

also drag queen not transvestite so it's all wrong yeah it bothered me too yeah there are quotes in weird like she's got quotes around nine-year-old boy in here wait is that is that not real is that a thing she thinks gay it's a whole thing anyway she goes on and is it a coincidence that in early october a person dressed in a transvestite demon costume with horns read lgbtq books to children as part of homosexual history month at long beach california library i'm sorry, but coincident to what? I mean, yes, in that it coincided with things, it is a coincidence. What the fuck are you talking about? Also, why did she specify with horns? Also, how would she know if the demon was a transsexual?

Right. What does that even mean? A demon, let me see your dick. Also, how would she know if the demon was a transvestite? Right? What does that even mean? Ah, a demon. Let me see your dick. She concludes, even we conservative Christians can't make this stuff up. Yes, yes, you can, Linda. You have. These people are truly out of their minds.

End quote. She would know all about it. She would know. Yeah. But luckily for Linda, she was given an early warning to the evils of Halloween when she and her friend played with a Ouija board. Quote,

when I was 14, I had my own bizarre encounter with the enemy spirit world by experimenting with a Ouija board. Since my parents were Episcopalians, I received no warnings of spiritual danger because at that time,

they lacked a mature, informed level of faith. Fucking Episcopalians. Yeah, take that shot. Basically Jews. But when my friend and I asked the, and again, this is in quotation marks, board question. She doesn't think it was a board.

What does that mean, Linda? When my friend and I asked the board questions, some unseen force pushed the pointer around. At times, our fingers were hanging on for dear life as it flew around the board often spelling out messages. Often! Often, which means but most of the time not. This is bullshit. It said that you were going to make out with

Grunz at the party. Now me too? What the fuck? We're both going to make out with Grunz. Foreign exchange student from Oslo is like, it's pronounced Gritsniff, and this is the best party ever. I'm going to drive a truck into some people in New York. She goes on. Way too soon.

How is it too soon? No one here cares. She goes on. I had a little, like, you see, and they all got up and they were like, oh, this's a terrible sorry it's super early to do this it's terrible day here in new york anyways five of them were venezuelans i'm just saying i had no they weren't they were argentinian that's way better than

venezuela venezuelans they wouldn't let in yeah same thing she goes on i had little biblical background to understand what this presence surely was now i can only thank god for mercifully protecting me from being drawn more deeply into this spooky and alluring world where the unseen has real tangible power end quote so god if you're real and listening first of all sorry about the whole show thing but all i can ask of you is this put me in a room with linda harvey and some invisible thread and i will take back all the mean things i have ever said about you i can't speak with that please god please please please next up in headlines from the riffra madness file new law just went into

effect in the state of mississippi that pretty much legalizes every possible form of discrimination as long as you think your intended victim is gay or trans or a layman knight or a gadiante or from any group that your bigoted wizardry club thinks is gross, thus making America greater again than it's been since antebellum times. Yeah. Well, no, I mean, to be fair, these times feel pretty antebellum.

Like a different bellum, but a bellum nonetheless. 2016, the lobotomized generation. Yeah, so we actually covered this last year when the law was originally proposed and at the time the head of the justice department was not a racist elf so it seemed like it'd be pretty easy to get rid of the law if it ended up going this far but things are different now and uh bottom line, a gay person in Mississippi could be refused service by a restaurant or a public school or even a fucking ambulance. So, God damn it. Sir, I need you to breathe. Also, do you like sweet, sweet pussy?

It's coming. So, great. Yeah, one other detail about HB 1523. That's the bill that made this law happen. As if it wasn't evil enough already, the license to discriminate doesn't even end with the LGBT community. For example, the bill specifically mentions that it's okay to refuse service to anyone you think might be committing adultery, which means yeah at some point uh during the debate over this bill there was one reasonable person and they were like wait um we can't just legalize discrimination against anybody who doesn't follow the rules of the bible otherwise we're going to be like stoning adulterers and the rest of the room was like shut up nerd fine we're stoning adulterers too the level of missing the point is staggering well yeah i mean they had to have one like non-gay

thing in the bill so it specifically singles out three protected christian beliefs the aforementioned belief that gays are gross no fucking before marriage and no being trans no just no existing if you are trans just a 45 year old 25 yearold walk up to a hotel desk. Guy's like, keep it moving. Keep it moving. Come on. Who the fuck you think you're fooling? Is this a father-daughter dance? No? Alright. Yeah. HB 1523, guys.

Yeah, and just in case the level of tragic ignorance wasn't high enough, Ken Ham decided to say some words into his magical electricity box again this week yarmish wolverine sent out the following tweet on monday quote atheists are not only religious zealots but most are extremely intolerant of and hateful toward christians they want christianity outlawed end quote, I know we're supposed to say something reasonable like,

no, we just want equality for everyone. Yeah. But if Christianity is going to include stuff like HB 1523, then yes, it needs to be outlawed. Well, right. If your religion requires you to break the law, then it's very literally illegal. We don't need to outlaw.

It's already illegal. That's illegal. Fuck. So you're telling me my new church of the molested child is just not allowed at all? That's bullshit. Only Christians. This is the problem. Freedom of religion.

Yeah. Well, it looks like we've got some legislation to draft. And a church to form. And some more legislation to draft after that. So we're going to pause for a quick break and hand things over to my lovely wife, Lucinda. A man wrote the Bible? A whore is what she was. If it's a legitimate race. A dangerous slut, right? Cooking can be fun. Hey, I'm proud of a man. This Week in Misogyny.

You know, sometimes I wonder what I'd do with a time machine. Go back and kill Hitler? Pick some winning law numbers? Or would I just throw a couple of lines into the Bible about keeping your laws out of my vagina? So before anyone draws a very special episode of Schoolhouse Rock about that, let's move on to our first story, which is for the 84th billionth time, Jesus taking the wheel on lady parts. This week, House Republicans are planning a hearing on a bill that would ban abortions after just six weeks long before the average woman knows they're pregnant and wouldn't you know it steve what have black people ever done that so great king is leading the charge and what's amazing is that

even the people backing the bill know it's unconstitutional they're just hoping to stack the bench of the supreme court with a few more gorsuch's hoping that pesky roe versus wade decision will be overturned. King, who looks like the closest he's gotten to a uterus in years is through legislation, admitted as much in an interview saying, quote, by the time we march this thing down to the Supreme Court, the faces on the bench will be different. We just don't know how much different, but I'm optimistic, end quote. Well, that makes one of us, Steve.

Then again, what with Mueller and all, is it safe to assume Trump isn't in the last year of his presidency? Let's let the people decide. Next up, a Portuguese court handed out a reduced sentence to a man who went all naked on his ex-wife with a baseball bat full of nails because the man who beat her claimed she cheated on him. And the Bible calls that a no-no. I shit you not, in his ruling about beating a woman with a bat, this crusty motherfucker of a judge said he understood the attacker because adultery is a very serious offense against a man's honor and dignity,

while pointing out that the Bible calls for the death penalty for adultery. And of course, in 1886, Portuguese law agreed with him because back then, if you killed your wife for cheating on you, you practically got a medal. And finally tonight, a bit of good news. As regular listeners know, Saudi Arabia has been crawling towards women's rights. And this week we took yet another baby step because women, wait for it, are now allowed to attend sporting events in stadiums. Take that, Iran. Now, I know some ladies in Saudi Arabia just lost their excuse not to watch football. Heads up, ladies, that shit is boring and you and Heath can watch it your damn selves works just fine.

And while it doesn't seem like a huge deal to us, this is part of a larger trend that deserves applause. And while you're all happy hopeful, I'll turn you back over to noah heath and eli thank you lucinda and in the old balls and chain news tonight senatorial shoo-in and guy who got fired twice for thinking jesus is his direct supervisor roy moore is back on our desk this week because we just can't stop finding proof of him saying insane, dangerous, horrible shit. Yep. Sorry, I'll try to limit that down some. This week, I'm talking about a podcast interview Moore did last November comparing gay marriage to slavery,

or more accurately, comparing the Obergefell decision to Dred Scott. That is a fucking ridiculous comparison. Dred Scott is hella easy to pronounce. Dred Scott. That is a fucking ridiculous comparison. Dred Scott is hella easy to pronounce. Dred Scott. We couldn't find a gay couple with the name Smith? One of them was named Arthur, I'm just saying. Anyway, the man who was about to become a fucking senator said, quote, In 1857, the United States Supreme Court did rule that black people were property.

Of course, that contradicted the Constitution, and it took a civil war to overturn it. No personal opinion on Dred Scott, sure. Sure. Okay, so he's saying we should beat the shit out of the South again?

I'm sure that can be arranged if it makes sense. Yeah, exactly. I don't know Heath my cousin's husband Seems pretty confident that his handgun Is going to overthrow the shit out of some Drone strikes I don't know if we want to mess with them Well organized group of idiots

That'll stop the fucking drones in the army He continues But this ruling in Obergefell Is even worse in a sense because it forces Not only people to recognize marriage other than the institution ordained of God and recognized by nearly every state in the union it says that you now must do away with the definition of marriage and make it between two persons of the same gender or leading on as one of the dissenting justices said, to polygamy, to multi-partner marriages.

Oh, okay. Same as slavery. Hold on. The construction of that argument, when synonyms are used, is marriage equality is worse than slavery because not only will gay people get married, but they will get married to gay people. Let's set aside how much astral glide he needed on his slope by the end of it. Just the argument in X's and Y's is ridiculous.

You could draw it like a football play. It would be ridiculous. However, you represent this. It's fucking stupid. It does sound like Roy Moore is ready to make a trade. What if gay people stop getting married, but Christian people are all slaves from

now on that's a fair deal he said that's a fair deal he did he did he certainly implies that well it actually gets worse he concluded oh we've got to go back we've got to go back and recognize that what they did in obergefell was not only to take and create a right that does not exist under the constitution but then to mandate that right compels christians to give up their religious freedom and liberty end quote what so wait i'll just let me see if i'm following this. One, this man was a judge. Two, the words that came out of his mouth were, black people didn't have rights. That was, you know, not good, certainly.

Gay marriage makes extra rights. Making rights is worse than not having rights. I think you might be being generous there. I think he's just actually closer. And finally tonight, from the Meowfistopheles file. Meowfistopheles. St. Louis Pet Expo. It's going to get worse.

It's going to get worse before this is over. Meowfistopheles, everybody. The St. Louis Pet Expo was supposed to happen over the weekend, but it was canceled at the last minute because of Satan. Yep. Actually, because of Christianity and how its existence can lead to stupid and destructive behavior. And in this case, that behavior came from a faithful adherent who thinks there's an evil demon fighting for control of the universe

by taking over the body of a manager for the shitty pet themed event planner in Missouri where she used to work as an accountant right up until she got fired last week for being a fucking lunatic and sabotaging the company because of the aforementioned Satan thing. Yeah. I don't know, Heath. You know, the sheer volume of the Internet cat photos control. Think about it. First come the cat photos, then comes the world. Right. Yeah. I don't know, Heath. You know the sheer volume of the internet cat photos control? Think about it. First come the cat photos, then comes the

world. Right, yeah. Plus, we have no idea how vaguely European this dude's accent is. I should be right. So, here's what happened. At least according to Amazing Pet Expos, or APE, the company... Bad acronym.

Bad acronym. APE is the company that canceled the event. And just keep in mind that APE has a long history of weird shenanigans like canceling big events at the last minute. Here's the excuse, though. According to their website, the crazy accountant lady had quote, come to believe she was

a prophet tasked with writing a new book of the Bible, was Moses reincarnated, and that the COO of the bible was moses reincarnated and that the coo of our company was the antichrist not a great start the dog ate my expo homework well it would have been way better the excuses right the dog told me to eat my ex right yeah yeah all right continuing the quote she'd been timing all of the COO's actions and claimed they all took place in increments of six seconds, six minutes, six hours, etc. Etc. Also six fortnights.

Every 12 weeks he would do something. No idea. Continuing the quote one more time this confirmed he was indeed satan she was also incredibly sickened by our lgbt staff members and in the most chilling portion of the recording there was recording uh she stated she needed to kill the coo slash satan end quote okay so we're just holding what we say privately about killing our boss against people now? Because if so, I am very sorry, Noah. Well, if you're going to kill me, do it now so I won't have to keep puzzling out what doing things in six-minute increments would look like.

I mean, I know he's not just pausing for the other five minutes. Does she mean that every time he does something, he was doing a different thing six minutes earlier? Because I do that. You were doing something six minutes ago. I was. I saw you. Noted. Noted.

Yeah, so got lots of questions. Lots of questions. Like, how does one remove the integer six from one's life also what the fuck was she recording she made a tape of herself with with a murder threat on it it's about i have no idea but most importantly why isn't anyone doing satanic pet expos that would be amazing that's a great idea so obviously we're gonna need 30 seconds on the clock names for the satan themed pet expo that someone needs to start planning immediately go all right i don't know you raised the bar pretty high with that meowphistopheles joke at the beginning um thank you uh you bet this bar is high apollyon paw like apollyolly how about a paradise lost

that was that was way better that's good yeah that's good um about bark angel

the lucifer ball fur no that works because it's a ball like an expert yeah um

well they're gonna need a mascot how about oh hell kitty the mephistopheline oh um uh Dante's inferno fur fur yeah kitty. The Mephistopheline. Oh! Dante's Inferno. Fur. Fur, yeah.

You're getting literary illusions in this week. This is strong. I'm probably the best at this part of our show. How about Paw Prince of Darkness? Paw Prince of Darkness.

Alright, how about Dog and May Dog? You know? Paw Prince of Darkness. Paw Prince of Darkness. All right. How about Dog and May Dog? You know. Like Gog and Gog. Yeah. Like the evil tribes they warn you about in Neuteronomy. Ah.

Ah. Neuteronomy. It's not. It's in Ezekiel. All right. Well, I ran out of things. So, Spaten, Lord of Barkless. Barkness? Barkness, Barkless. Barkness?

Barkness. Barkless. All right. All right. I got one more. How about Lord of the Fleas? No, that's good. That's good.

And on that note, pretty sure my cat needs a bowl of fresh goat's blood, so we're going to close the headlines there. Heath, Eli, thanks as always. No, that's good. Have sex with us at Skepticon. Usually you write something that's not good. Yeah, usually you don't read the thingy, but yeah. Have sex with us at Skepticon, unironically.

And when we come back, Aran Segev will be here to remind me why I'm going to sit on a plane for 25 hours. No one will know. No one will know. Here at Secret Lair Pennsylvania, we're hard at work preparing for our upcoming visit down under. And while we're stocking various anti-venoms, practicing our crocodile wrestling techniques, and drilling Eli on the very many things that international pilots don't consider fair game for prank wars, we're also getting ready for one of the premier skeptical conferences in the world and joining me tonight to tell us more about it is the president of australian skeptics inc aran sagev aran welcome to the scathing atheist thanks noah i was so worried i was going to mispronounce your name how did i do you did very well all right all right the the awkward

pause at the end gave me away okay well that's all i can hope I can hope for. All right, so correct me if I'm wrong, but Skepticon Australia is the longest running skeptical conference in the world, is it not? That is correct, yes. This will be the 33rd consecutive one. Wow. It's been running since 35, yeah, every year. In Australia, we have this arrangement where the various skeptical groups pick up the mantle in a different group every year, so it runs in different cities every year.

The past few years, it's been mostly in Brisbane, Melbourne, and Sydney. Yeah, we had a very big one in 2010. We had TAM Australia. And in 2014, we had one in Sydney again. And this year again, Skepticon 2017. Awesome. And how long have you been involved? game skeptic on 2017 awesome and and how long have you been involved i've been involved personally since uh 2002 or 3 when i suddenly discovered that there was such a thing as skepticism until

then i thought my name was no it all weirdo and all of a sudden i was a proud skeptic uh so that obviously attracted me very much and i've been involved ever since i've been on the committee since 2003 and um been president for most of the time since 2009 oh right on right on well i gotta say that is that is a hell of a moment isn't it that oh my god i'm not alone in this world moment that all skeptics share quite amazing it is it's like i believe that's as close uh to a a to an awakening a religious awakening that I've as I've experienced ever yeah it's it's this light bulb moment when you suddenly realize that it's not just that you're not alone you realize that there's a movement that it's a thing that it's not just you you're not a misfit it's it's really I mean you're still a misfit well right in a smaller way I suppose

well and not only that but you at the same time, you suddenly realize that it's worth fighting for. It's important. It's not just you correcting these idiots when they keep saying the wrong damn thing. It's not just you getting frustrated every time you walk into the pharmacy and see the homeopathic stuff right there with everything else. This actually matters. It matters enough for us to have 33 consecutive conventions. It matters enough for us to have 33 consecutive conventions. And it's something that obviously, you know, I spend a lot of my free time on skepticism.

So it's clearly something that's very important to me, something that you obviously understand on a very deep and emotional and practical level. And it's something that I think is really important. We make a difference. Yeah. All right. So now it's the oldest skeptical conference in the world. It would stand to reason then that it's also the best skeptical conference in the world. Is that correct? I don't think anybody would argue with that.

All right. Clearly the best. All right. So give me the hard sell then. Imagine I'm a listener somewhere near the Sydney area looking for something to do on the weekend of November 18th. Why should I go to Skepticon? Okay, well, first of all,

there's a bunch of guys scathing something who are coming along, and they're going to be performing Scathing Atheist on stage at the end of the first day. And if that's not enough, then there's going to be two other guys from Cognitive Dissonance appearing at the end of the second day.

So that already covers both days. In addition, I believe, Noah, that you and the Cognitive Dissonance guys are going to be performing the Citation Needed podcast. In addition to the main stage, we have a separate podcast room, and Citation Need is going to be performed in that room. Have I missed anything so far? Well, you know, that's all well and good, but I could see those guys just staying home. I mean, you know. Yeah. Well, we'll also have Britt Hermes, former naturopath and now a great fighter against quackery, especially in the naturopathic profession.

It's something that has landed her in some hot water. She's recently been sued by a homeopath who she told the truth about and also by Bastard University, who she also told the truth about. So we'll see how that goes. Captain Disillusion, I can't pronounce his last name. Nobody can. But Captain Disillusion is going to be there, perform on stage. We have astrophysicist Alan Duffy,

Dr. Carl Krasunitsky, who is Australia's version of Bill Nye, is going to be there. He's a great friend of the skeptics and appears at our conventions very often. Cara Santamaria is going to be there. Adam Spencer, a mathematical genius and great science communicatoraria is going to be there. Adam Spencer, a mathematical genius and great science communicator, is going to be there. Catherine Hughes is one of the speakers,

and I'd like to speak about her in particular because Catherine and her husband, Greg, have lost their son, Riley, to whooping cough. And rather than curl up in a tiny little ball, as most of us would, they have become great campaigners for vaccination, and we admire them so much. And Catherine's going to be speaking about Light for Riley, which is the charity they've established to promote vaccination. Also, see, I've had the great fortune to see Eli perform, not on a podcast, but live. Well, perform is perhaps not the right word because I was trying to interview you guys. And Eli is a walking visual gag. It's really impossible to describe through a podcast. It's amazing that a guy with that much visual humor in his quiver found his

niche in podcasting, isn't it? Yeah, he's a blogger and podcaster. That is absolutely quite amazing. Yeah, but also it's probably important to note that he will not just, in addition to performing on stage during the convention, there's also the convention dinner on the Saturday night. And Eli is part of the entertainment on that. So we really want people to come to the Saturday night dinner.

It's a gala dinner with, well, gala by skeptic standards, which means that your t-shirt must not be stained. It's not a black tie event. But you know, it's a three-course meal. There's going to be all the drinks for the entire

night. There's musical entertainment from Rian Sheehan. He's a New Zealand musician, great musician, and he's going to be performing. And Eli is going to be performing a magic and comedy show, which I'm sure will be great. And the highlight of the evening for us is that that's where we announce the annual Skeptics Awards. So great entertainment for the night, great excitement, and we hope people will join us for the dinner. right so i have an important because you know obviously you don't have to give me the hard sell i'm already going is there uh this is going to be my first trip to

australia are there any survival tips that you need to give me between now and then or any of our american listeners that are going to australia for the first time i mean besides not going to australia other than that yeah If you've abandoned that good advice, what would be like the second best advice? Second best advice is wear high shoes. No, really, you know, Australia is a little bit less dangerous than usually described.

Well, maybe a little bit more dangerous if you're gay, but... Well, that was going to be my last question, was would I be allowed to gay marry anybody while I was there? I looked that up on... Well, the thing is that

the last vote in our plebiscite on the lives of others is on the 7th of November, so six more days from today because I know that you are, it's the 31st of October, so six more days from today, because I know that it's the 31st of October for you, but it is definitely the 1st of November for me.

So in six more days, the voting will end, and then on the 15th, so before the convention, but while you're already in Australia, the results will be announced, and hopefully the yes vote will win.

And all of a sudden gays will be equal and never, never suffer from any discrimination ever again, because that's what always happens. Yeah. Just like happened here in the States when we legalized it. Yeah, absolutely. We,

we know that that's, that's the end of discrimination. So hopefully that will happen. You know, it's been actually, discrimination. So hopefully that will happen. You know, it's been, actually, you know, we're joking about it, but it's been tough because, you know, we all have a lot of friends who have suffered from discrimination for a variety of things. Being gay is one of them.

And seeing the vitriol and just pure hatred that's come out of the people who do not want gay people to be able to get married is difficult. It's really difficult for any right-thinking person, any moral person, I would say, to see. It's really been difficult. Well, I've got to say, you know, it is hard to shock an American that grew up in South Georgia with your anti-gay vitriol, but the stuff I've seen rolling out of the right wing in Australia has been disgusting. So, and I will say, though, I'm getting there on the 10th. If marriage equality is declared on the 15th, I'm totally taking credit.

I have one last question for you. During the eclipse earlier this year, you and I were in the same small town in southern illinois i saw 98 inclusion followed by a cloud you saw a beautiful eclipse in totality why does the sun hate me aron um because you smoke um uh because you're an atheist i don don't know. I'm an atheist too. I don't know. I really can't explain. Look, you know, I'll only say that it also hates Pamela Gay.

So I suppose. Yeah. And it clearly hates her more than me. Yeah. Because it hates her multiple times. It only hated you once.

Well, it's hated me twice now. Yeah. Yeah. Twice. But yeah, I think she's on five or six at this point.

So I'll, I'll, she's done a few. Yeah. All right. Well, once again, if our listeners would like more information about Skepticon or they want to pick up tickets, you can visit thinkinc.org.au or just check the show notes for a handy dandy link.

Aron, thank you again for your time tonight for me this morning for you and really looking forward to seeing you in person again. Look forward to seeing you soon now. Look forward to seeing you soon, though. In today's media environment, it seems like nothing trumps fear. Whole industries exist to pump fear into our homes and heads 24 hours a day. And the result is an ever more visible erosion of the trust that acts to bind a democracy together. But some people believe we can rise above those fears, steal our courage against the onslaught of international and domestic disasters,

cast aside our phobias and come together as a cohesive, fearless society once more. And to those people, I say, are you fucking kidding me? We still have a whole state full of people that are afraid of coffee. And it's with those people in mind that we bring you a brief selection very brief selection from christian cinema far too short to make it to god awful movies but still too fucked up for us to not talk about in another installment of god awful mini mini mini so tell us heath what will we be breaking down today all right we watched a cup of coffee it's a motionless picture about a very serious mormon topic and that would be the classic coffee mix-up that almost gets someone killed.

And Eli, how bad was this mini? Well, if you found the story about the time your friend almost fell down but didn't, too gripping and full of adventure, you will love this 2 minutes and 35 seconds of still photography and audio with so the first thing you need to know about this video is that there will be no moving um and that will be disturbingly weird right we'll just see still pictures and dialogue over them real creepy real creepy and we're gonna say we're gonna start with a picture of kids playing soccer i also of course we have to point out that there is a sign language interpreter covering a third

of the screen uh i'm sorry what oh you mean the lady in front who was making fun of all the dialogue i thought that was mean i know youtube has a meaner culture but just like that all those gestures and stuff i don't know not my cup of tea i just want to point out that they chose her over written words at the bottom anyway so yeah so we see a couple of kids playing uh soccer now we should point out that this is in the early 80s um shorts and ball hair reached about the same distance down in the early 80s if you're too young to recall yeah jesus it was pretty ridiculous so did the shorts go up in the 80s i'm pretty sure they were upside down they just started at the waist and went up

yeah so we're meeting neil craig and mrs. Robinson, who are talking about what a great game they had. Yeah, Mrs. Robinson. Which actually makes sense because the sexual tension with these children is thick. Okay, thank you. You're the first one because there's a lot of like, oh my gosh, guys, like, what are we doing? We're all sweaty and done. I'm in a position of authority. You've taught me so much about soccer today.

What can I teach you? And Bancroft. This movie's a lot like The Graduate. Yeah, no. It's very similar to The Graduate. Except for there's more than like a seven-year age difference. Yeah, so Neil and Craig are two boys in school. Mrs. Robinson is a new teacher at their school who is also a member of their church, as we're going to find out in a moment.

But first we have to establish this subplot about the pictures. Oh yeah, everybody's going to be lost if you don't explain. Yeah, exactly. They took pictures of the soccer. Yeah, so Craig took pictures of the soccer match and Neil would really like to see those pictures. So would Mrs. Robinson for reasons that are insufficiently explained. It's like swiping on your friend's phone just like, hey, hey

look at the picture of the city dog. Alright, so now we cut over to the church or get still photos of the church. Neil and Craig are hanging out there. We start off of course with another give me my fucking pictures moment um where are my fucking photos neil where

are those photos so then we get i guess i guess you'd call this a montage right except for it's pictures so how do you do a montage and pictures well what you do is you have audio fade in and out of people saying church words. Okay. Yeah. I was confused by this. Like I'm thinking, is this person doing sign language for me because my hearing's going in and out? How do they know that?

Is this the movie? Do I get her now from now on? Everything just like. Also, you have to wonder to wonder like because as this is fading in and out she's doing the sign language like how do you fade out in sign language I kept expecting her to like start slowly backing

away from the camera or something you put wait you put a magnifying glass you put a magnifying glass the other way over your hands she just starts doing itsy bitsy spider yeah it's pretty amazing over your hands as they get smaller. She just starts doing itsy bitsy spider. Yeah, it's pretty amazing.

They got sign language like backwards. They have sign language for all the parts except the ones we can't hear. Yeah, right. And by the way, we cannot overstate how banal the snippets of sentences that we're getting fading in and out are. It's like, you know, it'll fade in and it'll just be somebody saying, and I'm really proud of the kids for all the things

they've done. And then we move on to the next one. I think it might be that they were like worried a full sentence would like let the magic out too much. So it was like, and the beginning of the Mormon magic redacted. Yeah, right. There you go. There you go. It'd be like letting

the handshakes get out, which is why they use still photos. I learned the fucking handshakes. Oh, yeah. And I have been doing them to every strange man I meet. So, okay. So the key here is that Neil really and Craig both really like Mrs. Robinson's testimony, and they're very glad she's teaching at their school.

So now with that important church scene out of the way, we go back to the school where they can't even tell whether to call her Mrs. Robinson or Sister Robinson because it's teacher and it's church mate. They're so confused. They're like, good job, Sister Teacher. Great, great porn category, Sister Teacher, by the way. Yeah, yeah.

So, well, first, before she shows shows up they have to like talk they have a little quick conversation about how they like mrs robinson and how she makes him feel tickly under the belly and and and and i want to point out they already had this conversation this video is two minutes 49 seconds long and they're stretching for content anyway remember that plot line about the pictures just came back full fucking circle neil needs craig to meet him in the dark room after school to get those pictures i wrote in my notes hey you want to meet me in the dark room for those pictures and maybe to get kicked out of the house by our dads we're not sure

yeah there is no question they're gonna fuck in that dark room though they actually show us a still shot well everything's a still shot but one of the still shots is craig i fucking the shit out of neil yeah walks away yes yeah right as he's walking away right um okay so neil's waiting on craig to come back with the pictures and he looks over and sees mrs. Robinson pouring fucking coffee. Drip coffee. I felt the same way. They do a three-shot zoom on the coffee pour. Again, these are still photos, but it's like one, two, three.

The final shot is a close-up where we can see the plastic top of the pot's not orange. Like, oh, it's getting it. Yeah, right. as a close-up where we can see like the plastic top of the pots not orange like oh yeah right it's like psycho music like not decaf so of course neil runs off to tell craig all the horrifying news craig cannot fight he refuses to fucking believe it he's like don't fuck around man if she was pouring coffee i will honor kill her i will honor her right now cut to a picture of him curled up in the shower fully dressed rocking back and forth no man no not mrs robinson man yeah he shows up he's like dude i saw mrs robinson pouring a fucking coffee like she could have been raping a kid with another kid's sawed-off arm the news would have been the same like dude

she was pouring a fucking coffee yeah so they're gonna lynch mrs robinson's what's happening here so then he so like i said craig is is not believing he's like i refuse to believe it she's too mormon for that it. She's too Mormon for that. It's impossible. And then along comes Mrs. Robinson with that caffeinated whore that she is. She has the cup of coffee in her fucking hand. Just showing it off for everybody. Yeah.

Hey, Mrs. R, check out this crucifix we made over this fire pit. Try out the ropes. Just check, test, just feel how the ropes are. And they're like, hey, we've got that picture for you. What is this? We just always carry acid in a flask with us. Just look at the picture. Bend over.

And she's like, hold on. I have to bring Mrs. Olsen this cup of coffee. It's not for me at all. She twisted her ankle and has trouble getting around. Coffee's for Mrs. Olsen. Yeah, yeah, the Lamanite. She's the worst. Keep poisoning her.

That's good. Yeah, right, right. Well, now here's the thing, though. Okay, if coffee is really this bad, like it's hard to get into the Mormon mindset and believe that coffee is evil. But if you do, like, isn't bringing someone coffee also evil? You'd think. Like, I mean,

crack dealers are also to blame, aren't they? Anyway, but then we get the Scooby-Doo fucking ending where Neil turns to Craig and he goes, and we thought she was going to drink it. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Yeah, big laugh. Like, were you guys going to murder me? We were going to murder you.

Oh man, this is lit. Maybe be more clear about coffee for now. Yeah, maybe just, yeah. This is for someone else. This is for someone else. This is for someone else. And by the way, we're going to include, like, again, this is less someone else this is for someone else and by the way we're going to include

again this is less than three minutes we're going to include a link on the show notes for this if for no other reason then everyone should go read the comments they're fucking worth it so with the knowledge that somehow disaster was averted and that Mrs. Olsen is going to burn in hell where she

belongs I suppose we can close the book on yet another god-awful mini. Mini. Mini. Mini. Mini. Before we make room on your up next list, I want to urge you one last time to make it to Skepticon.

It's almost geographically impossible for you to be further away from it than I am, and I'm coming out so you have no excuse excuse other than not being able to afford it, or having a family, or a real job, or being allergic to poison. But other than that, you should definitely come. Anyway, that's all the blasphemy we've got for you tonight, but we'll be back in 10,022 minutes with more. If you can't wait that long, be on the lookout for a brand new episode of our sister show, The Skeptocrat, debuting at 7 a.m. Eastern time on Monday, an even newer episode of our sister show's hot friend, Godawful Movies, debuting 24 hours after that, and a still new episode of our sister show, The Skeptocrat, debuting at 7 a.m. Eastern Time on Monday, an even newer episode of our sister show's hot friend, Godawful Movies, debuting 24 hours after that, and a still newer episode

of our half-sister show, Citation Needed, debuting 29 hours after that. Obviously I'd have to start calling myself a para-podcaster if I fail to thank Heath Enright for somehow managing to fit 26-hour workdays into Earth's rotation at least a couple of times a week. I need to thank the lovely and talented Lucinda Lusions for making love out of nothing at all. I need to thank the lovely

in his own way, Eli Bosnick, for never finding a dick joke too big for him to take. I need to thank Aran one more time for working with me through a 15-hour time difference to make that interview happen. Also want to thank Chris from the Podunk Polymath Podcast, who is backed by popular demand for this week's Farnsworth quote. If you'd like some more rationality in your life, you'll find a link to his show on the show notes for this episode. But most of all, of course, I want to thank this week's best bipeds, Matthew, Matt, Lynette, Keshu, Elvin with an I, Elvin with an E, and Kelly. Matthew, Matt, Lynette,

and Keshu, whose opinions give Neutron Stars weight envy, and Elvin, Elvin, and Kelly, whose sexual prowess is so legendary it's narrated by British people.

Together, these seven savory savants of savviness severed a sliver of their savings to save our severe savaging of the Savior this week

by giving us money. If you think your intellectual prowess is up to the challenge, you can make a per-episode donation at patreon.com slash scathingatheist, whereby you'll earn early access to an extended ad-free version of every episode, or you can make a one-time donation by clicking on the donate button on the right side of the homepage at scathingatheist.com.

And if you'd like to help, but your finances are a little up in the air until that Nigerian prince gets back in touch, in the meantime, you can help us a ton by giving us a five-star review on iTunes, Stitcher, Google Play, or wherever else they let you do that kind of shit. Legal services for this podcast are provided by the Law Offices of P. Andrew Torres and our audio engineer, Morgan Clark, who also wrote all the music that was used in this episode, which was used with permission. If you have questions, comments, or death threats, you'll find all the contact info on the contact page at ScanTheGayDS.com.

And Morgan, if you want to put maybe some war sounds and explosions behind that. And also Christmas music. Also Christmas music. And then also Christmas music. Oh, and also Christmas music would be pretty good. Silent night. Yeah, whatever's public domain. Bells, just bell.

But not church bells. Well, maybe church bells. Also church bells. Sleigh bells? Do you mean sleigh bells? Bam! Ring-ting-ting-ling-to? All right.

And Morgan, if you can make it sound like it's echoing but not and sort of like coming up from the ground but a little bit country. Quiet but loud. That quiet loudness. Well done but juicy. The preceding podcast was a production of Puzzle and a Thunderstorm LLC. Copyright 2017. All rights reserved.