The Scathing Atheist - 592: IVFU Edition

Episode Date: June 20, 2024

In this week’s episode, the Southern Baptists gather to yes and their own bigotry, the Pope invites comedians of the world to his open mic bringer show, and just when Anna thought she was out, the C...hristian music pulled her back in. --- To make a per episode donation at Patreon.com, click here: http://www.patreon.com/ScathingAtheist To buy our book, click here: https://www.amazon.com/Outbreak-Crisis-Religion-Ruined-Pandemic/dp/B08L2HSVS8/ If you see a news story you think we might be interested in, you can send it here: scathingnews@gmail.com To check out our sister show, The Skepticrat, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/the-skepticrat To check out our sister show’s hot friend, God Awful Movies, click here: https://audioboom.com/channel/god-awful-movies To check out our half-sister show, Citation Needed, click here: http://citationpod.com/ To check out our sister show’s sister show, D and D minus, click here: https://danddminus.libsyn.com/ --- Guest Links: Hear Noah on Where There’s Woke: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/wtw54-tucker-carlson-interviews-aaron-rodgers/id1693761293?i=1000657986142 If you wanna check Scott out on Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/scottwinns1 --- Headlines: Founder of Modest Needs charged with embezzlement: https://apnews.com/article/modest-needs-new-york-charity-embezzlement-taylor-5d5dfd28e2c1ebe46a34fbaa031ba779 Highlights from the SBC annual convention: https://www.friendlyatheist.com/p/what-we-learned-from-the-southern Trump’s Spiritual Adviser Quasi-Confesses to Molesting 12-Year-Old Girl: https://www.thedailybeast.com/trumps-spiritual-adviser-robert-morris-half-confesses-to-molesting-12-year-old-girl Survey: More than half of UK Christians experience faith-based “hostility and ridicule”: https://www.christianpost.com/news/more-than-half-of-uk-christians-experience-hostility-for-faith.html Mike Lindell will "deputize" Trump voters to do fraud on Election Day as part of "God's plan": https://www.rawstory.com/mike-lindell-my-pillow-2668534125/ MyPillow CEO says he tried to 'get arrested' for Jan. 6 — but he wasn't even there: https://www.rawstory.com/mypillow-ceo-says-he-tried-to-get-arrested-for-jan-6-but-he-w-despite-not-being-there/

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Warning, the following podcast may be unsuitable for prudish motherfuckers. This week's episode of The Skating Atheist is brought to you by HelloFresh, BetterHelp, and by the new curated book lending service for Christians hoping to protect their children from books that might challenge their worldview, the Bald Face Library. Bald Face Library, it's just an empty room. All books challenge a Christian worldview, none more than the Bible. And now, the scathing atheist. This is Richard from Texas and I'm trying to help my son with his dream of being a Twitch streamer. He is scottwins1, that is S-C-O-T-T-W-I-N-N-S-1 on Twitch.
Starting point is 00:00:41 And if you've ever had to play multiplayer games on the internet you know that we did indeed and backed all from filthy monkey people It's Thursday. It's June 20th. And it's the first day of summer! Hot girl summer, let's do it. Yeah! No illusions. I'm Eli Bosnik. I'm Heath Henright.
Starting point is 00:01:22 And from Anthony, Comstocks, New Jersey, Ann Arbor, Michigan, and Waycross, Georgia, this is the Skating Idiot. On this week's episode, the Southern Baptists gathered a yes and their own bigotry. The Pope invites comedians of the world to no-and comedy. And just when Anna thought she was out, the Christian music pulled her back in. But first, the diatribe. The puzzle in a thunderstorm family got some real punch in the gut news this week. On Tuesday, federal prosecutors in the Southern District of New York unsealed an indictment
Starting point is 00:02:05 against one Keith Taylor for $2.5 million worth of embezzlement and another million worth of tax evasion. And while that name might not be familiar to you, it's damn familiar to me because Keith Taylor is the dude who founded and runs Modest Needs, the charity we've spent the last five years raising over a million dollars for, and yes, the entity he's accused of embezzling from is that charity.
Starting point is 00:02:31 I wanna be clear upfront that these are still just allegations. Taylor issued a statement through his attorney vowing to fight these accusations and clear his name, and that still might happen, but if it doesn't, this is obviously a heartbreaking for us here at scathing, along our friends Tom and Cecil over on cognitive dissonance and our entire community at that because look vulgarity for charity is the best thing I ever did. I am prouder of what we've accomplished there than I am of anything else I've ever been
Starting point is 00:02:59 involved with. It is the capstone on my eulogy and now I'm afraid that it's always going to be tainted. Now being said, I want to be clear on what this doesn't mean. This doesn't take anything away from what you have done as a community of listeners. If you were a donor to Bulgarity for Charity or if you promoted the fundraiser or you told friends about modest needs, you're still the same amazing caring generous person that you were yesterday and the day before. You did, we all did what we thought was a good thing. Now if it turns out that some of that money that you were yesterday and the day before. You did, we all did what we thought was a good thing. Now, if it turns out that some of that money
Starting point is 00:03:28 that you thought was going to needy families was going to, as the indictment alleges, Keith Taylor's cosmetic surgery and outrageously expensive gourmet meals, that just makes you, in addition to caring, generous, and amazing, a victim. But despite all that, it's hard not to second guess yourself
Starting point is 00:03:46 even when you know that, right? Like I know I'm second guessing myself. I've met this guy. I had breakfast with him once. Not at a two star Michelin restaurant or where the fuck he's accused of pissing away modest needs funds on. And to be clear, by the way,
Starting point is 00:03:57 we paid for the breakfast when we had it. But I sat across from the man and I thought I had got a really good sense of him. And if the shit in this indictment is true, I did not. You know, I could not have been further from the truth. And when that kind of shit happens to you, you can't help but start wondering about everyone. Right? Especially when it happens to you twice.
Starting point is 00:04:18 As I'm sure you recall, last year we had a different situation where a trusted friend of the show was mired in disturbing allegations that shook our community to its bones. And even before that, the larger community of atheist activists had lost one hero after another as we learned that they'd secretly been pieces of shit all along. And it makes you wonder if everybody actually sucks and they're all just faking it and you're a fucking idiot and you just keep buying it. And that is an easy thing to think right now, trust me, it is an easy thought to get lost in. But then I'm reminded of the myth of the New York asshole. You've heard this one, right? The myth that people in New York City are all a bunch of assholes. People repeat this stereotype all the time and people who visit confirm it, right? Even some people who have
Starting point is 00:05:03 lived there for years get caught up in it and repeat it like it's a fact, but it isn't. New Yorkers are some of the nicest people in the world and the statistics back that up. When you live that close to so many people, you have to be nice. That's why cities are so much more liberal than their rural counterparts. So where does the myth come from? Well partly it's because most people don't know the difference between being in a hurry
Starting point is 00:05:23 and being an asshole. Right? You order a pizza in picky-dittle Indiana and they start the call by going, well, thank you for calling Aunt Mabel's Brick Oven Pizzeria on Main Street. How you feelin' on this lovely day? Right? You order a pizza in New York and they're like, Joe, what do you want? That's not rudeness.
Starting point is 00:05:37 That's the byproduct of trying to serve a thousand times as many customers a day as Aunt Mabel's, but that's only a small fraction of where the myth comes from. Where the bulk of the rumor comes from is from people in New York City that are assholes. And I know I sound like I'm contradicting myself, but the fallacy here is in the volume, right? You go to the store and picky-dittle to pick up a few things that you're going to encounter, what, eight people? A dozen people? Depending on the time of day, it might be as low as zero people. So if one person in a hundred is an asshole, the odds that you're going to run into one on any given trip is pretty low.
Starting point is 00:06:09 Now run to the store real quick in the East Village. Pick a few things up. You run into what? 6,000 fucking people. If one in a hundred is an asshole, you're going to run into 60 of them every time you leave your apartment. And I think it's the same thing here, right? Over the decade plus that we've been doing the show, we've met and partnered with hundreds of people.
Starting point is 00:06:27 And yes, some of them have turned out to be assholes. Some of them have turned out to be a lot worse than that. But they drown under the vast sea of amazing people in our extended family. And I think of Tom and Cecil, two of the biggest hearts I've ever met and I've ever had the pleasure of working with. I think of Sarah and Aaron and all the wonderful people at Cannes who saw a tragedy and built a shield out of it. I think of Nick, Debbie, Alison, Jeff
Starting point is 00:06:52 and all the great people at American Atheists, Daryl, Gail and everybody with recovering from religion, Frank and Dan, Thomas and Lydia, Andy, Marsh, Cara, Dan and Jordan, not to mention the thousands of amazing listeners that donated that million dollars plus to modest needs in the first place. These are the best people I know, the best people I have ever known. And when you put them on one side of the scale, it takes a lot of assholes to nudge it. Right now, I don't say that in forgiveness, right?
Starting point is 00:07:21 We're obviously going to rethink a lot of stuff when it comes to vulgarity for charity, and we'll keep you posted on the changes as they're finalized. But the fundraiser isn't going anywhere. It'll soldier on. It'll continue to show the world the very best of the secular community. And again, depending on how these allegations shake out, I have a pretty good sense of who we're going to be insulting first next year. Joining me for headlines tonight are the peanut butter and jelly of this sandwich, Heath Enright and Eli Bosnik. Fellas, are you ready to spread the news? Let's do it.
Starting point is 00:07:57 One jar, one knife. One band, one sound. Absolutely. Full hearts can't lose. I thought we were a sandwich metaphor. At least it got away from me. I'm sorry. Drum line. So, a sticky situation indeed lose. I thought we were a sandwich metaphor.
Starting point is 00:08:05 This got away from me. I'm sorry. Drum line. So sticky situation indeed. See, I brought it back. So we're going to pause for a word from our first sponsor this week. Hello Fresh.
Starting point is 00:08:15 Barsity Blues. Friday Night Lights. God damn it. Right? That's it. And she was only 12 when they shot the movie. 12? Seriously? the movie. 12? Seriously? Yikes.
Starting point is 00:08:27 Yeah. Like how is this not the first thing people say about that movie? Feels oddly overlooked. Right? All right, guys, we got the cheesy bedsticks, the blasted buckle potato skins and the mozzarella dipping bites. You want to order mains or should I just bring you a check? A check?
Starting point is 00:08:43 I'm sorry. You must not have heard. We are HelloFresh customers. Oh, what's HelloFresh? With HelloFresh, you get farm fresh, pre-portioned ingredients and seasonal recipes delivered right to your doorstep. Skip trips to the grocery store and count on HelloFresh to make home cooking easy, fun and affordable. That's why it's America's number one meal kit.
Starting point is 00:09:03 I mean, that sounds great, but why does that make your mozzarella dipping bites free? Well, when you sign up for HelloFresh today, you'll unlock free appetizers for life. Get the party started or enjoy a little pre-dinner treat with an appetizer of your choice in every HelloFresh box. For free! Well that sounds amazing, but have you actually tried it? I sure have. I was a HelloFresh customer before they became a sponsor. I love how the meals unpacked from the box in their own bags in seconds.
Starting point is 00:09:30 That's why I, Ethan Wright, personally endorse HelloFresh. And they even have vegan options now. All right, guys, I'm sold. Where do I sign up? Go to HelloFresh.com slash scathing apps for free appetizers for life. One appetizer item per box while subscription is active. All right. Well, since your apps are free, I guess I'm headed out. Yeah, sure.
Starting point is 00:09:57 Before you do, have you ever seen Interview with a Vampire? It's a really weird scene, man. I heard you guys talking. I have so many questions. Yeah, probably best not to think about it Yeah And now back to the headlines in our lead story tonight in SBC what you did their news the Southern Baptist Convention held their annual meeting last week and it turns out the group founded on
Starting point is 00:10:21 Regular baptism wasn't white enough isn't exactly on the cutting edge of culture. As the major issues they tackled were lady ministers continuing to cover up child rape and of course an official rejection of in vitro fertilization. So fucking dope. And meanwhile Pope Francis just went to a group of Seven summit about the future of artificial intelligence. I have no idea what the fuck he's going to contribute to that, but regardless, SBC, you're lagging behind the Catholic Church about something. Yep. You do have to wonder if they were like, yeah, so it's going to take, you know,
Starting point is 00:11:00 this many gigawatts to create GPT-7, so we really need to get solar. And he was like, you guys want me to ask a god? I could ask a god about it. He's the one who made the intelligence to begin with, huh? Please don't interrupt. Madness of the sun. Okay. Please don't interrupt.
Starting point is 00:11:13 I call you a slur. You had a stupid shoe. All right. So first off, big thanks to Hemet Mehta over at the Friendly Atheist blog and podcast for providing this wrap up. You can read his thoughts in the show notes or subscribe to his sub stack and hope, as I do, for it to one day contain pictures of his feet. Yeah, I can't believe he hasn't been on the show for so long. It's weird. Yeah, the last time I invited me asked if it was a threat. Exactly. So we started off with an expulsion. Delegates voted 6,759 to 563 to expel Virginia's first Baptist Church of Alexandria, which,
Starting point is 00:11:52 while both homophobic and transphobic enough for Southern Baptists, and with the knowledge that they've raised millions of dollars for missionary efforts and still have a dude as their senior pastor, have a lady as their pastor for children and women, so out on their ear they fucking went. Yeah, no, no, you can't be mostly bigoted enough. That's how you get Anglicans, Dave, no. Literally, yes, yeah. But that was actually just the beginning.
Starting point is 00:12:17 See, the expulsion vote was just the appetizer for the vote on a formal policy called the law amendment, which would banish any SBC church that placed women on the leadership hierarchy or even openly supported the idea that women could do that. Jesus. That policy, which required a two thirds majority to pass, failed by 6%. That's right, only 61% of Southern Baptist representatives thought thinking a lady could be a pastor was grounds for automatic expulsion.
Starting point is 00:12:53 So you know, basically a bunch of woke liberals down there at the SBC now. Just to be clear, some of those woke liberals in that 39% still want to ban women but let you think about not doing that. Right, yes, exactly. Yeah, so if you're wondering how behind the times they are, even holding that vote would have been illegal for any group that wasn't a religious one since 1964. So 60 years on this issue, further on all the science stuff, but 60 years on this issue. Sometimes way further. All right, next up on the agenda, kid fucking. Regular listeners to the program will remember that back in 2022, we learned that, let me quote from Hemet here, quote, over the previous decade, more than 250 SBC staffers or volunteers had been
Starting point is 00:13:39 charged with sex crimes against more than 700 victims. We also learned that in the SBC's own investigation that a private list of alleged predators that wasn't shared with member churches included 703 abusers with 409 believed to be SBC affiliated." The situation was so bad that the Department of Justice announced it was investigating multiple SBC entities, though not specific individuals, about their mishandling of sexual abuse cases. Yes. Again, what distinguishes the Catholic Church is the thoroughness of their record keeping. But last, and certainly not least, the meeting voted to confirm the new Christian bigotry
Starting point is 00:14:23 hotness in vitro fertilization. Yes, if you're new around here, Christians were running out of lines in that first they came for the Quakers poem. So they're now opposed to in vitro fertilization because the embryos that don't get implanted, you see, get destroyed. And I wish I was joking, because this is also part of their argument. The person with the penis during in virtual fetalization
Starting point is 00:14:52 has to masturbate into a cup and masturbation is wrong. Okay, what if we have boring sex with a cup that the cup doesn't enjoy? Does that help? There you go. Because we can definitely make that happen. Yeah, right. But okay, I'm sorry. I'm looking for consistency in Christianity, the cup doesn't enjoy. Does that happen? There you go. Because we can definitely make that happen. Yeah. Right. But okay, I'm sorry. I'm looking for consistency in Christianity. But the thing that makes masturbation wrong in their moral construct
Starting point is 00:15:13 is the fact that it isn't procreative. Right? So this is the one time they're allowed to fuck a cup guilt free and they're screwing it up. Yeah. Take the W. Okay. But my favorite part of the resolution is where they describe embryos like they're frozen in carbonite by Jabba the Hutt. Okay. So real quote from the amendment. Estimates suggest that between 1 million and 1.5 million human beings are currently stored in cryogenic freezers in an embryonic state throughout the United States with most unquestionably destined for eventual destruction." Okay, do you think we could
Starting point is 00:15:50 set up a hostage situation using embryos and like get stuff from the SBC? Yeah! I feel like we could, right? At least like some pizza and a helicopter, right? And I want those things. We have, yeah. They have a jet. So yeah, in spite of the fact that millions of Southern Baptists have used this technology to have the babies God wants them to, they are running out of members to alienate. And so they're going to help raise our listenership over the next couple of years with this bullshit. So thanks for the pledge drive, SBC. We appreciate it. It's really nice of you guys.
Starting point is 00:16:25 Yeah. Boy, they just make our job easier every time they get together, don't they? You guys should do twice. You should do twice a year. Do you have any good charities we could use? And in the Morris You Know News, as much as we talk about the harms of religion on this show, we tend to avoid specific stories about kid fucking. Like, not that we don't fuck kids. We don't.
Starting point is 00:16:52 I mean, we don't talk about people who fuck kids. We don't talk about people who fuck kids. This is why, right here, because this is what would happen if we did. Rain it in, man. But none of us, for the record, none of us fuck kids. Especially me. One is the reason. Especially? Especially. Extra. One, the reason we don't talk about this is because one, it's super not funny. And two, it's the same story every time. Right? An individual using the guise of religious leadership does the worst possible thing you can do to a child. And then the tax free institution does their darndest to cover it up. And those stories are only relevant in that if it was the only wrong thing with religion, it would still make religion not worth it.
Starting point is 00:17:33 But don't say however. Okay. Yeah, but this week we got an extra bit of relevancy as it was revealed that mega church pastor and Donald Trump's spiritual advisor Robert Morris admitted to molesting a 12 year old girl. God damn it. That tracks with the horrible universe. No other commentary.
Starting point is 00:17:52 Fuck. Oh, I have some other fucking commentary. Look, I feel like if a person's chief descriptors are mega church pastor, Donald Trump's blank or blanks spiritual advisor, you got a pretty solid chance to rape in 12 year olds and he's all three. Yeah, checks all the boxes. Now, I'm not going to go into the details of this abuse because it's gross, but he molested a 12 year old girl and this week, the Wartburg Watch, a religious watchdog blog, reported on it. So Morris gave a statement to the Christian Post, which is the least apologetic apology
Starting point is 00:18:26 I have ever fucking heard. Listen to this thing, quote, when I was in my early 20s, I was involved in inappropriate sexual behavior with a young lady in a home where I was staying. It was kissing and petting and not intercourse, but it was wrong. The behavior happened on several occasions over the years." End quote. Jesus fuck. Okay.
Starting point is 00:18:50 So when I was in my early 20s, so he's excusing himself in advance, I was involved in passive voice here. It just happened to me. I didn't do it. Inappropriate sexual behavior, so he's got a dismissive euphemism with a young woman. You mean child, man, not young woman. Child, 12 year old child, yeah. In a home where I was staying, oh I was just a victim of circumstance,
Starting point is 00:19:09 it was just kissing and petting, it was a medium molestation, but it was wrong, as if that needed clarification. That's two fucking sentences and there's eight red flags in it, holy shit. Yeah, and I know you were all going to rush to defend me, but it was wrong. It was wrong Yeah, but don't worry now in his third sentence He's gonna talk about how awesome he is quote in March of 1987 This situation was brought to light and it was confessed and repented of oh well part of my brain forgave a different part of my Brain you see so mm-hmm. I submitted myself to the elders of Shady Grove Church and the young lady's father.
Starting point is 00:19:49 They asked me to step out of ministry. Not the mom? No, not the mom. No, not the mom. Cool. They asked me to step out of ministry and receive counseling and freedom ministry, which I did. Since that time, I have walked in purity and accountability in this area."
Starting point is 00:20:03 End quote. Congrats. Thank you. walked in purity and accountability in this area." End quote. Um, congrats. Thank you. Congrats on your 37 year chip that I'm certain you're lying about. What the fuck is happening? Jesus. But it actually gets worse. Just two years later, he admits he returned to ministry and I swear he thinks this is
Starting point is 00:20:20 a good thing. He explained to the Christian Post that he met with the victim and her family and that quote, I asked their forgiveness and they graciously forgave me and quote. It's so fucking gross that they forgave him, right? Because that means that the victim didn't have autonomy, right? Like her family pushed her into the, like the dad's forgiveness for this somehow fucking matters. Yes, a religious leader of a mega church came to your house and was like, say the thing because I'm the leader of your spiritual community.
Starting point is 00:20:50 And also he's using that to rub it in because the victim is who came forward to the Wartburg blog. So it's just fucking awful. Wow. That's the apology. Me and a woman of youngness got a little too close at the sock hop, but I said, I'm sorry. And they said it's fine. Yeah. And this guy has a church with a hundred thousand weekly worshipers. So yeah, this is awful. And another example of religion doing the worst possible thing a human can do and accepting no responsibility for it. So I guess it does make a lot of sense why he's Trump's spiritual advisor. I guess we could say that. Sure the fuck does. And speaking of people who need a lot of counseling,
Starting point is 00:21:28 let's take a quick break for a word from our other sponsor this week. BetterHelp. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Dude, how many more seconds? 15 seconds. Oh, I'm so cold. Me too, so cold. Hey guys, what's with the ice bath?
Starting point is 00:21:41 Are you trying to cryogenically freeze yourself so you can call Walt Disney an anti-semite when he wakes up again? Okay, first of all, someone has to be brave enough to say it, and two, no, we're doing this instead of therapy. Okay, why? Well, as men, the internet provides us lots of things to do instead of dealing with our emotions. Ice baths, breathing, weird diets. Plus, therapy is far and expensive. Well, have you guys tried BetterHelp? Oh, what's?
Starting point is 00:22:11 Keith, you can't pause that long. It's awful for the podcast. Oh no, he went into shock. You gotta punch him in the chest. Oh. What's BetterHelp? Thank you. If you're thinking of starting therapy,
Starting point is 00:22:22 give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. So no awkward therapist breakups? No awkward therapist breakups.
Starting point is 00:22:36 And if I need someone who's not gonna tell me the cure I need is Jesus Christ? They can help you find that too. Take a moment, visit betterhelp.com slash scathing today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help. H E L P dot com slash scathing. All right. Thanks Noah.
Starting point is 00:22:52 No problem. So you guys going to get out? It's been 15 seconds. Oh, you know what? They're both in shock. Hang on. I'm going to say I'm going to just leave them that way for a while. And in mind over martyr news tonight.
Starting point is 00:23:07 Fantastic. Discrimination against Christians is a very real thing, right? From the churches being firebombed in Myanmar to the congregations being repressed in China to the Christians being tortured in Eritrea. But if you spend your days perusing American Christian media as I do, you might never know about any of other real shit. Because instead of talking about all of that, when anytime they marry the words Christian and persecution, you can all but guarantee they're talking about restrictions on homophobia,
Starting point is 00:23:33 which was the case yet again when we got a study from Voice for Justice UK claiming that the majority of UK Christians experience hostility towards their faith. Ah, British people are the best at hating stuff. I'm so jealous. They are, yeah. Marsh can tell you to go fuck yourself with just, mm, mm, mm, mm. And it's charming.
Starting point is 00:23:55 Would we say that? Absolutely, you can. So yeah, so we learned about this one from the Christian Post, the nation's foremost purveyor of bullshit Christian persecution narratives. And the first bait and switch in this article happens in the fucking headline, right? Because the Christian Post ran with this headline, quote, more than half of Christians in UK experience
Starting point is 00:24:13 hostility and ridicule for faith study, end quote. But the article's second sentence admits that what they really mean is that, quote, 56% reported negative pushback for sharing their beliefs in some capacity, end quote. Yeah, not hostility for being Christian, hostility for trying to shove that shit down someone else's throat. Right, but they should get hostility just for being Christian too, that's bad. Like even if they're one of the millions
Starting point is 00:24:44 of super chill Christian people who never mentioned their faith and are definitely real, still. Yeah. Look, I know I've said this before, but substitute any other bad idea and it becomes obvious how much of this is a cell phone, right? 56% of racists reported negative pushback for saying slurs. You see how that's a you problem, right? Right. Well, yeah, but as you read further, it becomes clearer and clearer that the beliefs that were earning that negative pushback were clearly anti-gay stuff, right? The study admits as much eventually when it points out that, quote, when it comes to beliefs about marriage,
Starting point is 00:25:18 sex, and gender, while the rest of society was swept along by progressive ideologies, most Christians appear to have remained steadfast to Orthodox Christian faith." End quote. So what this study is actually lamenting is the fact that Christians who complain about pride flags at work are told to fuck off. Yeah, also, what the fuck are you talking about? 66% of British Christians are pro-gay marriage.
Starting point is 00:25:41 It's literally not most. Well, yeah, and they have to admit that right away, right? Because it's not just at work and in the public square that British Christians are facing pseudo-discrimination. It's also happening in the church. That's right. In a quote so ridiculous, I almost feel like you'll need a notarized version to believe I'm not making it up. The article says, quote, The study suggests the situation in mainstream churches is no better, with the ninth chapter of the study exploring how many of them are, now quoting the study, quote, adopting progressive secular ideologies with the result that laity can feel discriminated against and are increasingly
Starting point is 00:26:19 leaving them, end quote, end quote. So the churches are discriminating against them by believing in a less bigoted type of Christianity than they do. The Christians are un-Christianing my own Christianity. Yes. And finally tonight, in Pillow Talk News. Fuck yeah! Christian pillow magnate, come Christian pillow enthusiast whose entire business is failing,
Starting point is 00:26:47 Mike Lindell, spoke into a microphone twice last week, and as usual, it went very badly. The first one was a speech at an alt-right convention, during which he tried to explain God's plan for electing Donald Trump in November, but instead he accidentally described a very obvious voter fraud scheme that doesn't even make sense and wouldn't work anyway because he's an idiot and he's the one who thought of it. And the other was an interview during which he said he tried to get arrested by the FBI for January 6th, but he wasn't there on January 6th. Yeah, that's how that works. Yeah, that was nothing. sixth, but he wasn't there on day six.
Starting point is 00:27:25 Yeah, that's how that works. Yeah, that was nothing. I'm pretty sure he had a stroke without the actual stroke part. His brain is just doing stroke stuff naturally. Yeah, I mean, at this point, the crack is just wandering around his brainstem, like a hooligan in an old catacomb,
Starting point is 00:27:40 just looking for shit to destroy. Sounds about right. So the Alt-Right Convention speech was during the Turning Point USA People's Convention in Detroit. And if I wasn't busy with my rich family life of love and kind of sorta stepdad stuff, I would have definitely spent Father's Day attending the event and starting slow claps at random times that made no sense. I didn't go. During that conference, which also included an appearance by Donald Trump,
Starting point is 00:28:14 Mike Lindell explained what he believes to be God's plan for the upcoming election. He said that Trump supporters need to quote, confuse all the electronic people. What? Exact words about God's plan. Just Mike juking his way up to the voting machine. Mr. Lindell, this is nothing. Oh, I fell down. I fell down real bad.
Starting point is 00:28:43 Don't do serpentine on the ground. Well, though, he's seen this tactic of confusion work against him a number of times. I see where he's getting it. Yeah He's trying to do that. Donald. What's his name? The guy from singing in the rain? He's trying to do that run around in a circle So Here's what Lindell said next and I spent way too much time trying to figure out what the fuck is happening in these words I'm still completely lost and And so is he. Either way, I'm pretty sure he's describing a very direct crime of voter fraud.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Sure is. Much like the fraud he spent the last four years trying to prove, except the evil plot is real in this case that he came up with. But let me know if you guys have a guess as to what Lindell even thinks he means. He said, exact quote, they're not going me know if you guys have a guess as to what Lindell even thinks he means. He said exact quote They're not gonna know if you're gonna vote early or if you're gonna vote on Election Day Everybody needs to reach out and get your early vote get your ballot on Election Day You take this ballot and you go to vote and if they say well you've already voted Then we have a plan where you're gonna go outside
Starting point is 00:29:45 And if they say, well, you've already voted, then we have a plan where you're going to go outside, then you're going to open that up." And I guess he means open up that ballot. And from there, he wants people to take a picture of their ballot and send it to a place that he called the Election Crimes Bureau. Sounds like a government thing to monitor election crimes. It's not. It was apparently set up by Lindell, and it's a website that says, Lindell Offense Fund at the top of the page. And he claims that plan, whatever the fuck that was, is gonna help Trump by providing new evidence. Okay, so please commit election fraud
Starting point is 00:30:23 to prove the other side did that four years ago. Jimmy Kimmel put me in a claw machine. But here's the thing though, he's going to pull the Orson Welles defense. At some point, that drivel is going to be presented in a court of law by his lawyer as evidence that there's no way anyone could possibly have taken any coherent instruction from that. This is the Tucker Carlson Fox defense. Classic legal tactic.
Starting point is 00:30:51 The Dominion guys keep taking my pan. They take my pan off of my desk. So LaDelle also added, quote, we're going to have you all be deputized to save our country. We all need you to deputize all of you if they steal it again like this. I, the people will demand these machines that we paid for out of our tax dollars. Again, end exact quote. Oh yeah. No, yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:19 You know how you can just demand things because they're paid for by tax dollars? It's really the only way to get a good aircraft carrier these days if you think about it. Yeah, I want my one 330 million. So here's what happened during Lindell's interview last week. He spoke to some piece of shit Republican guy with a podcast doesn't matter. piece of shit Republican guy with a podcast doesn't matter. And he told the story. Same job as us. Of getting his phone confiscated in 2022
Starting point is 00:31:48 as part of the investigation into election tampering in Mesa County, Colorado. Reminder, this happened at a Hardee's drive-through. According to Lindell, quote, "'So we pull over." To be clear, he means I'm in line at Hardee's. He pulled over into the drive-through lane at Hardee's on purpose and then this happened. Continuing.
Starting point is 00:32:11 The FBI agent says, we're not here to arrest you. We're going to ask you some questions. Well, I wanted to get arrested. I kept going, no, you arrest me. I want to go to the January 6th." End quote. What? Just a cat going limp that doesn't want to take a pill. No! January 6th!
Starting point is 00:32:33 Continuing the story. I said, well, I told them I want to go, even though I wasn't on January 6th. I want to go there and speak out what I know and everything, right? And so here I am telling them I want to get arrested. I preached. I talked to them about God in my book. I mean, I kept them there for two hours, you know? Okay. Sometimes cops have a hard job and it's okay for them to kill people. Can we agree on that? Yeah, I think I'd be turning my body cam off right about then. So wait, so wait. He told the cops he wanted to be arrested for something else so that he could get, what,
Starting point is 00:33:16 thrown into jail where the January 6th people were and rally the truth so he could show a January 6th judge his documentary? I think you got it about right. So apparently the FBI agent in charge was having, you know, the greatest day ever. Just weeping laughter at this Hardee's drive-through and let this all happen for two hours. Again, in a Hardee's parking lot. But the FBI wasn't going to arrest Lindell and bring him to the J six hearings in shackles on a request. That's how nothing works. So they let Lindell call
Starting point is 00:33:54 his lawyer and the lawyer told him, yeah, man, give your fucking phone to the FBI. They have a warrant. Also, you owe me like 800 grand. He did not get the 800 grand. So now that phone is one of many pieces of evidence that might lead to Mike Lindell getting in big trouble for election tampering. Another new piece of evidence would be the speech he gave describing the election tampering plan from God, a God who got foiled in 2020 and is now trying to quote, confuse all the electronic people with the help of Mike Lindell. With the help of Mike Lindell. I know he means people that work on electronics, but he could mean robots, right?
Starting point is 00:34:35 Like that substance of what... There's no way to know he doesn't mean robots. He might mean both in his head. And he secretly means Jews, so it's double confusing. And quick before all the joy of that story is sucked up by the realization that we're losing to that side we're going to wrap up the headlines for the night. Heath, Eli, thanks as always. Jumanji.
Starting point is 00:34:57 And when we come back we'll get your toes a tap. Sometimes we break down Christian music because we want to. Other times we do it because we have to. And this is one of those latter times. So without further ado, it's time for another installment of God Awful Music. And of course, if we're going to talk music, we need to talk to the two and four to our one and three and a boss. Nick and a welcome back to the show.
Starting point is 00:35:31 Clap. Oh, what a wonderful intro. I am so flattered. I'm the two and four. Hell yeah. Thank you, guys. No one has introduced me, so I will not be participating in this. Eli is also still here.
Starting point is 00:35:45 Everyone will have no idea who is here. Eli's the one. So tell us, Anna. Heart and soul? I hate being the new five. So tell us, Anna, how did we wind up with what basically amounts to an emergency session of god-awful music. Okay, so occasionally a song for this segment just falls directly into my lap or like cascades directly into my lap without me having to move a muscle. And that's what happened with this.
Starting point is 00:36:14 I was sitting there enjoying the pajama week visit and I just was on my phone on TikTok for a little bit and almost immediately on my page it's like, oh, this absolute gem of a song. And obviously I favored it, because fuck my algorithm, this is gold. I'm gonna need to see it again. And then I noticed, oh, hey, look, two people already sent it to me in my messages.
Starting point is 00:36:33 Oh, wait, a few tagged me in it already too. Oh my God, I opened up Instagram. Four people have already sent me this, including two friends who don't even listen to this fucking show, but know that I like this kind of sense of humor thing. This is Psyop by China on you. I know.
Starting point is 00:36:46 It's like, yeah, anyway. What I'm saying is this is all your fault. You are the reason my TikToks think I'm a progressive Christian. Okay, I'm about to get a love song by RFK Jr. about Ivermectin or something like that. Pretty close. Pretty close, yeah, I was gonna say. To be clear, I love it when people send me these things.
Starting point is 00:37:05 I fucking love it. Please, if there's a song you think I'd like, well, like isn't the right word, absolutely devour, never hesitate to throw it my way. Please. I'm so glad, Anna, that you put the last bit of that on there because, of course, as I'm sure you recall, during that you finding that you were tagged in it on seven different things but you had 14 different platforms, I was also showing, I was like holding my phone. Anna look at this! Keith was asleep. So you know all the locations. So what will we be breaking
Starting point is 00:37:36 down today? You all asked for it. The Chosen One by Natasha Owens. Yes and you sent us this little video. It's not like a video. It's just a clips of Donald Trump the entire time. Oh, that is the official music video for this. That is the official campaign video for Donald Trump as well. Sure is. Is it the official campaign video too?
Starting point is 00:38:03 I know it's the official music video. No, it's not. I know it's the official music video No, it's not I know it's the official music video for this song. Yeah, it's not the official campaign video yet We will wait. Yeah Can I point out that because we're not gonna talk because it's literally just footage of Trump So I'm not gonna talk a lot about like and then he's doing this but the seeing what a Trump supporter thinks is good Footage. Yeah. Yeah is a fascinating insight into their minds. It's the same shit we'd have picked. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:29 It legitimately is, like over and over again. I'm like, well, you're not going to show that scene. That's his mugshot, people. Here's him falling down a ramp. Yes! They used the falling down a ramp footage. Ah, so, but of course the first thing that we're going to see when we start the video is that this song is apparently brought to us by Patriot Mobile, mobilizing freedom. The only cell phone company a little more obscure than Heath's. Mine's Google.
Starting point is 00:38:56 You've heard of Google, right? Not the phone company. Google Fi. So, the intro music is basically a declarative statement. You're about to hear something Republican. That's what this music says. It sounded like you'd get two bars of this before a public access show called Country Crafting. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:39:20 Imagine the overture for a country musical, which should be a thing, about the Capitol riot. Like, I thought... Anna? Oh my God. They stole our idea about our flag man's death. This is ours. This one's ours. This one's ours.
Starting point is 00:39:33 Yeah, dibs, dibs, yeah. Seriously, I thought the QAnon shaman guy with the horns was about to like walk into the frame, just tossing an apple up in the air. Let me tell you a little story about freedom. And like do the song. Writes tell you a little story about freedom. Do the song writes itself. So then the lyrics kick in and the opening line of this song is, and I quote, I'm not saying he's something divine.
Starting point is 00:40:00 OK, you are, though. That's literally the title. It says it in the title. And very first moment of the video, they show Donald Trump walking with Melania, and as usual she visibly hates touching his hand so much. It looks like she's in a haunted house and her hand is in a bowl full of grapes. That's how she feels about holding Donald Trump's hand. She goes on, he gets in trouble bigly all of the time, Wink. Bigly! So clever. So I heard this just audio at first and I wonder who she's talking about. And this is where they show him walking up a ramp onto an Air Force One.
Starting point is 00:40:40 See? He can do it do it down part went very badly This would be like me really enjoying the Mexican food when the clip went viral of me having diarrhea on stage at a Chuck E cheese the following Well, I keep in mind we have to look at to the side so we know for sure we can't tell if there's any toilet paper Hanging off of the back of it. So yeah, so then the lyrics go, he's controversial, but one thing is true. And I'm like, he lost the 2020 election. No. Imperfect people, a perfect God can use. The construction of that sentence is so tortured
Starting point is 00:41:17 it violates the Geneva Convention. Fucking relax Yoda, what are you doing? Imperfect people, a perfect god, a blue. What? Why couldn't god have used Bernie Sanders? Right? Because he's Jewish and I pay attention. Oh, fair.
Starting point is 00:41:34 Also, by the way, at this moment in the video, we watch a diplomat from Saudi Arabia snap his head around to check out the hottie known as Donald Trump as he walks by and there's another Saudi diplomat and he's very disappointed like the girlfriend right yeah so no I just because we're interrupting in the middle I want to point out here that the rhymes we've used so far are divine with time and true with use so we're nailing it. Yeah, totally on the head now It's time for the course. I'm standing with the Chosen One and you hear Donald Trump say I am the Chosen One in the middle Not remember he said yeah, that's a real thing that happened Donald Trump
Starting point is 00:42:21 Looked at the sky and yelled, I am the chosen one. Like he was calling dibs at God on chosen one. Yep. Ain't no stopping what the Lord's begun. And this is the part where your eyebrows are supposed to fly up into outer space and never come back down. Yeah. Always that part. No, I love this line because in their bullshit stolen election narrative, we totally stopped at the Lord's began. Like a pretty heavy. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Wasn't even that close.
Starting point is 00:42:53 Ann described me as an old surprised wizard if I remember correctly. Yeah. That was accurate. Nailed it. What other mean stuff is your fiance? Sexually? A lot. She goes on, he's only human like you or me, just the chosen one. Okay, it's a weird clarification that your preferred presidential candidate is in fact chosen by God to do his bidding, but didn't get magic powers.
Starting point is 00:43:24 Right. Don't ask him to't get magic powers, right? Like, don't ask him to use force lightning though, okay? And then she closes it with the chosen one. Is he, you see, fucking close your rhymes. It wouldn't, I wouldn't even mind if she rhymed me with me this time. This is just crazy. This is like twinkle, twinkle little star,
Starting point is 00:43:44 how I twinkle twinkle. Letter R. So then we get verse two. This great nation is under attack. Okay, Ed, this is where they show us a bus that's supposed to be like evil immigrants attacking our nation because of that lyric, but it's clearly just a charter bus from like a tourism company in Mexico. It's painted red, green and white. It's so silly.
Starting point is 00:44:14 I don't think people are sneaking across the border in a bus painted like a Mexican flag. I don't think so either. There's some rural on top of the bus. So I went down a YouTube rabbit hole on this. This is a US based tourism company that takes Americans to and from Mexico. Oh my god. I love it because she must have obviously used a black and white scary image of a regular bus then she'd been like, shit, that's just a bus.
Starting point is 00:44:41 Typed Mexican bus into YouTube. Yes, exactly. typed Mexican bus into YouTube. And would you like nine guesses as to what the first image results were Mexican buses? Oh my God. Oh my God. Speedy Gonzalez carrying a bus across the border. Might as well be. She goes on, and its real leader. This is such a weird fucking line, right? This great nation is under attack and its real leader has zeros in his back. Is she saying that Biden is a robot?
Starting point is 00:45:11 I have no idea what this lyric means and I'm offering cash to anyone who could tell me. It's so fucking weird and it doesn't even have the right number of syllables she has to force it in to. Okay, how much cash, Eli? You don't have a lot of cash. So for that line.
Starting point is 00:45:30 I dive $3. In the video, I still want that. They show Fonny Willis, Alvin Bragg, Letitia James, and Jack Smith, because those people are zeros, got them. Oh! They're in his back. What that is still you haven't explained
Starting point is 00:45:48 with that fucking thing. They were stuck with attack as the rhyme and they fucking panicked. While writing. This wasn't a song by an improv troupe as much as it sounds like that. He wrote that. She was carving it into stone
Starting point is 00:46:04 and she's like, well, damn it, yeah. Damn it, why did I use zirconium? She goes, so many greet him with Judas' kiss. Right, he had to break up with like half his cabinet. Yeah, yeah. We get a long shot of Mitch McConnell, like right after shitting his pants and then trying to hold
Starting point is 00:46:25 completely still. I'm pretty sure that's the shot they used here. Is that Judas Kiss? Is that what that does to you? And then she shows this like series of Republicans that would rather dissolve Donald Trump in acid than shake his hand. And I'm like, I bet you couldn't find a long group of Democrats that felt that way about Biden. I mean it's so weird that you have so many examples in a moment's notice.
Starting point is 00:46:51 And then this show is a lion for a while. Right yeah. Shit the footage of people who hate Donald Trump ran too long. Can we just insert a lion clip here? But God gave us a warrior for such a time as this. Time like this fits into the rhyme scheme, but no, she goes with such a time as this. Yeah, he fell asleep at his own felony trial four times. He's like a lion!
Starting point is 00:47:18 He's like a lion, Eli. Hey guys, our lion warrior poet has toilet paper stuck to his shoe. People won't notice, right? Hey guys, our lion warrior poet has toilet paper stuck to his shoe. People won't notice, right? So we get the chorus again, I'm standing with the chosen one, ain't no stopping what the Lord's begun. They show the thing where he offered to buy everybody food after his arraignment at this point. They don't show that he never actually did that, right? They just said he offers to buy.
Starting point is 00:47:42 He didn't though. The owner of the thing was like, yeah, everybody just got food and he was already gone. He's only human like you or me, just the chosen one, the chosen one dot dot. And from this point in the music, it just gets more cacophonous. It's like they started at a zero and then they're just adding more tracks. It's like dueling banjos in a cavern. It's so loud and so reverbus. There's so much delay on this bullshit that you can barely hear the change in the chords.
Starting point is 00:48:18 I think there was an update to GarageBand while she was writing the song. Six tracks you say. All right, let's get messy up in here, girl. There you go. And then we get the bridge. Brothers and sisters, lay down your stones. No.
Starting point is 00:48:36 And we see Trump praying with the guy from Newsboys, Michael Tate. And I became immediately furious that I recognized that guy and knew his name. I was mad for it. You're welcome.
Starting point is 00:48:49 Wasted life. There's only one God and he's still on the throne. Pretty sure the Bible's pretty clear about a lot of the things Trump's did and we should not, in fact, put down our stones. No. Yeah, maybe check put down our stones. No. Yeah. Maybe check with God about that. Yeah. Right. But also that means God picked Biden, right? Like the good God picked us out of
Starting point is 00:49:12 the throne. All right. So then we get the chorus one more time. I'm standing with the chosen one. Ain't no stopping with the Lord's begun. He's only human like you or me. Just the chosen one, the chosen one. Fuck you, Anna. This is where they show a clip of Donald Trump standing proudly behind a fancy banquet table with five golden candelabras and a sad pile of McDonald's food. Oh God. And he got filet-o-fishes just as a reminder.
Starting point is 00:49:40 Who the fuck would eat a filet-o-fish? That's the most offensive thing he's ever done. Is the filet of fish purchase. If we had, through some national emergency, been forced to do something like this at platinum night, there's no amount of my worldly income I wouldn't spend to hide this footage, let alone hope people wouldn't use it in a fan tribute to me about being the chosen candidate of God in the presidential election. Oh, but the song's not over yet. We have not been paroled yet. We have this outro, right, that goes on forever.
Starting point is 00:50:15 She's like, he stands for me. He stands for you. Very specific definition of you there that I should point out does not include anyone on this podcast. He stands for fillet of fishes. That's what he stands for. specific definition of you there that I should point out does not include anyone on this podcast. He stands for fillet of fishes. That's what he stands for. The chosen one. He stands for freedom. He stands for truth.
Starting point is 00:50:35 I just, there is no cavern deep enough for me to scream into about that. I expected the last line to be, unless you're a Jew, right? He stands for freedom, unless you're a Jew, right? He stands for me, he stands for you, he stands for freedom unless you're a Jew. Unless you're a Jew. And then she finishes off, Trump is the chosen one. Yeah, in case you were wondering who she's talking about. Right, yeah, exactly, it makes it clear.
Starting point is 00:50:56 And then- Oh, Donald Trump. Yeah, yeah, there you go, you're getting it. It's like a metaphor. Is it? No, it's not. And then the song ends with everyone in a big crowd chanting USA like Stephen Colbert's bit.
Starting point is 00:51:15 They actually close with the USA chant for 15 seconds. Like when I'm done watching a Christian movie in a theater, but unironically seconds of a USA chant BFDs is there anything else that you counted along the way? I did I did they showed and I counted this I seriously I Did tick marks they showed? 116 American flags no shit
Starting point is 00:51:43 Two minutes and 40 seconds. And I was like not counting every single little, I'm sure I missed some. I didn't count like lapel pins as extra. People's t-shirts. All right. So I guess the big question before we get into the song here is what have we learned here today? We have learned that Natasha Owens has to be on this show again, because I am not kidding.
Starting point is 00:52:05 I just looked back at her catalog, and it includes such bangers as America First, Trump won, and you know it, and Stand For Life. Yeah! She also has a Christmas album that you know I have to listen to now. And she has a whole, like a few whole albums of Christian music that are on the books as well. Since like 2013 she's been a very prolific woman.
Starting point is 00:52:33 I feel like she's going to be a regular. Yeah. I also have to do a shout out for this one. I have to do a shout out. My buddy Colin Forham plays Irish banjo. And I needed a banjo for this one, but I needed like a southern southern banjo it's a totally different instrument in case you guys don't know and he fucking learned how to do five string banjo just for this and he fucking nailed it. Right on awesome. I'm picturing a banjo with a brogue and I'm trying to figure out. I mean kinda. Kinda. Okay. You know, toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy toy. Yeah, that's what I was going for. Alright, so, look, I honestly, I was tempted throughout to describe this song as beyond
Starting point is 00:53:11 parody, but Anna parodied it for us, so I can't say that. So Anna, take it away. He's always bought his way out of trouble somehow His reputation's getting stormy now And yet I betcha come this next primem Half the country's gonna fuckin' vote for him They'll stand with the convicted one Even after all the shit he's done And after 34 felonies He's the convicted one The convicted one is he
Starting point is 00:54:11 His coffers are empty, his reputation reeks Sounds even stupider the longer he speaks He kinda orchestrated January 6th Literal treason, and yet their minds are fixed They'll vote for the convicted one He actually said that he could get a gun And shoot somebody off Fifth Avenue And you'd still vote for him The convicted one, it's true
Starting point is 00:54:49 Fellow Americans and country all He's a motherfucking criminal They'll still vote for the convicted one I wanna yeet myself into the sun He makes me hate democracy He's the convicted one The convicted one Fuck that man, he paid off Stormy Dan He hit some classified docs in that Mar-a-Lago
Starting point is 00:55:30 can Antagonize North Korea Pardoned war criminals, Vig told COVID relief And built that stupid fucking wall, he did election fraud Faked his health report, appointed the three worst people in the whole Supreme Court. He sent some racist tweets and some sexist tweets. He sent some homophobic tweets. He sent some tweets that might be evidence of literal treason. On January 6th of 2021. And actually this is the part of the song where I was going to list literally all of the things,
Starting point is 00:56:08 the stupid things that he did during his career, but there were so many of them that I literally did not have time. So fucking he's your chosen one. He's your chosen one. Oh, oh, oh. Another amazing job by Anna. It's almost worth Christian rock existing just so that we get to hear her eviscerate it. And before we lower the veil this week, I wanted to let you know if you can't get enough me in your life, be sure to check me out on Where There's Woke. That's a podcast with Lydia and Thomas Smith. We chatted about Tucker Carlson's interview
Starting point is 00:56:44 with Aaron Rodgers and the more people that hear our breakdown, the less it's going to Check me out on Where There's Woke. That's a podcast with Lydia and Thomas Smith. We chatted about Tucker Carlson's interview with Aaron Rodgers, and the more people that hear our breakdown, the less it's gonna feel like that was all done in vain. Anyway, that's all the blasphemy we've got for you tonight. But we'll be back in 10,022 minutes with more. If you can't wait that long, be able to look up for a brand new episode of our Sisters Show's
Starting point is 00:56:56 Hot Friend Got Off On Movies Day, being at seven news on Tuesday, and even a new episode of our Have Sisters On Sight Tastes Needed Day being at noon Eastern on Wednesday. Obviously, I can't close the show out without thanking Heath Enright for being the best, Eli Bosnik for also being the best, and Lucinda Lujans for being even better than that. I need to thank Anna noon Eastern on Wednesday. Obviously I can't close the show out without thanking Heath Enright for being the best, Eli Bosnik for also being the best, and Lucinda Lujans for being even better than that.
Starting point is 00:57:08 I need to thank Anna Bosnik one more time for always blowing us away. I also want to thank Richard for providing this week's perfect post-Father's Day Farnsworth quote. Again, his son's twitch handle is ScottWins1. That's two T's and two N's. We'll have it on the show notes as well. But most of all, of course,
Starting point is 00:57:22 I want to thank this week's and last week's and the week before that's best people and holy shit. Am I about to learn a lesson about putting this off for two weeks when one of those weeks included the last two days of major on buckle in y'all. We ain't even going to try for that one breath shit this week. Here we go. Hugh Mungo, Isaac spicy scoop, tut Dave, Liam Donovan, Ashley, Carl, Brian, Nike allows Craig, Lena, Bill, Donovan, Ashley, Carl, Brian, Nike, Louse, Craig, Lena, Bill,
Starting point is 00:57:45 Andrew, Stacey's mom, Athena, and we got a cake, Necrat, Rich, Kenny, Mari, Vinny, Fist Bumps, Colin, Mandy, Britt, Nate, and Joshua, Elena, David, Hercinian, Great King, Rat, Ash, Drake and Wolf, Tuesday, Kristen, Kindle, Chris, Venture Free, McGee, Ollie, Hugo, the Golgothan Creator, Gage, Jerry, Doodle, Vontainstain, Mr. Rohoney, Benjamin, Mike, Lady AJ, Waffle Priest, The Books That Burn podcast, Keith, Jefferson, Dennis, Peyton, Jeff, Rachel, Derek, Spiked, Nalgene, Leon, Bobo DeBeer, A Bag Full of Bags, Chase, Veronica,
Starting point is 00:58:19 Sean, Morgan, Heather, Eli's Daddy, Ruth, Lena, Anti-Sesal Propaganda, we're not even halfway through guys, Bryphlo, Kaliaga, Godless, Gary's daddy, Ruth, Lena, anti-seizile propaganda. We're not even halfway through guys. Briflow, Calliaga, Godless, Gary Gnu, Greg, Balfour, Cravens, G, the D, Moe, Ben, Sean, Logan, Natasha, Nanya, Bidness, Unofficial Opinion, Steve, Michael, Michelle, Stella, Robin, Kieran, Roger, Marjorie, Dave, Crystal,
Starting point is 00:58:41 Monica, Robert, Kilgore, Trout, Gen X Nerd, Elias, Keith, Smith, Victory, Someone Save Us, Jeff, Tired Ravenclaw, JP, Crystal, Monica, Robert, Kilgore, Trout, Gen X nerd Elias, Keith, Smith, Victory, Someone Save Us, Jeff, Tired Ravenclaw, JP, Bradley, Audrey, John, Johnny, Sean, Dato, Bethany, Tony, My Real Name is Aaron Too, Stonewater, Genie, Stephanie, Shannon, Lyber, Chaos, and Scott's Little Monkey. Who are so well endowed that I can now say this podcast's members too big for me to fit in my mouth. Together these 114 people, declarations, podcasts, admissions, doxings, and really silly books that I almost
Starting point is 00:59:10 memorized back when I was into woo helped exercise my lungs this week and last week and the week before by giving us money. Not everybody has the money it takes to give some to us, but if you do, you can make a per episode donation to patreon.com, so that's scathing atheist whereby you'll have access to an extended ad free version of every episode. Or you can make a one time donation by clicking on the donate button on the right side of the homepage at skatingadios.com. And if you'd like to help but you've spent all your money on things that you like more than us, you can also help a ton by leaving a five star review
Starting point is 00:59:33 telling a friend about the show and following us on social media. Speaking of social media, Tim Robertson handles that for us and our audio engineer is Martin Clark, who also wrote a little music that was used in this episode, which was used with permission. If you have questions, comments or death threats, you'll find all the content tomorrow on the contact page at skatingadius.com. Don't touch your penis right now. Sure. The podcast was a production of Puzzle and Thunderstorm
Starting point is 00:59:57 LLC copyright 2024, all rights reserved.

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