The Scathing Atheist - ScathingAtheist 125: Ray the Gay Away Edition

Episode Date: July 9, 2015

In this week's episode, our podcast is decriminalized in Iceland, we learn that Si Robertson has the exact same resume as Elmer Fudd, and Eli joins us to review "Audacity", a Ray Comfort video about people watching Ray Comfort videos.

Warning, you aren't going to find any amateur vanity in this podcast. This week's episode of The Scathing Atheist is brought to you by the new Bestiality Wedding Service that's a logical extension of legalizing gay marriage. Bride Groomers Wife Wrangling, LLC. Because we're definitely going to get sued for this. Not only is BG Dubs the world's premier provider of non-human slave bride wedding logistics. We also provide a wide range of other services, including those tailored for inanimate objects, like bridges, grapes, very small rocks, and churches.

Bridegroomers wife wrangling. We treat animals and objects, like the Bible treats women, with animal husbandry. And now, the Scathing Atheist. Come along to the Australian Skeptics National Convention in October, and you will see we did in fact evolve from filthy monkey men. Speakers include Nobel Laureate monkey man Brian Schmidt, monkey woman Susan

Gerbick of Gorilla Skeptics on Wikipedia fame, and plenty more. Okay monkeys, mash that keyboard until you get convention.britishwinskeptics.org or Hamlet, whichever comes first. It's Thursday. It's July 9th. And apropos of nothing, a Snapple Peach iced tea in Chinatown, New York costs about $2.

Hmm. I'm no illusions. I'm Heath Enright. And from unboiled peanut shortage, Valdosta, Georgia, this is The Scathing Atheist. The locals got that. On this week's episode, our show will become legal in Iceland. We learn that Uncle Cy from Duck Dynasty has the exact same resume as Elmer Fudd. And Eli Bosnick will be here to review a Ray Comfort video about people watching Ray Comfort videos.

But first, the diatribe. It's very rare that I get a chance to talk to a kid about religion without it being really creepy. And without divulging too much information, I'm just going to ask you to trust me that I was in one of life's rare circumstances where it's entirely appropriate to talk about atheism with somebody else's religious kid. And it was fascinating. You know, he's curious. He's trying to reconcile all the conflicting shit he's heard from a parent on either side of the theological divide, and while all the logical stuff that he's hearing from the atheist side resonates with his rational brain, he's not willing to risk burning in hell over a few irrefutable rhetorical arguments just yet.

He's making what seems like a rational decision, but it only seems that way because the imaginary stakes for being wrong have been raised so high. Of course, there's nothing new there. That's probably why most Christians believe to some extent. But what made the conversation so fascinating is that at 14 years old, he hadn't learned a lie about why he believes yet. If he's still a Christian in 10 years and I ask him, why do you believe in God? He's going to give me some kind of convoluted God of the gaps meets first mover meets argument from suspension of all the rules of argument nonsense. But at 14, he's brutally honest. I say, why do you believe in God. He's going to give me some kind of convoluted God of the gaps meets first mover meets argument from suspension of all the rules of argument nonsense. But at 14, he's brutally honest.

I say, why do you believe in God? He says, because God's going to burn me in hell if I don't. You know, eventually they'll abandon all these reasons and just stick to rationalizations instead. And if you don't believe me, by the way, just listen to any episode of any atheist call-in show ever recorded anywhere. It's the most frustrating thing about listening to something like

The Atheist Experience. You know, they'll ask the people, why do you believe? And then the people will offer up these bullshit apologetics that have nothing whatsoever to do with why they believe. I mean, obviously they don't, because when the hosts read those apologetics, the caller doesn't stop believing. They just move on to the next thing. You know, but the last thing a grown adult Christian wants to admit to an atheist is

the real reason why they believe. And why not? Because they talked to some atheist when they were 14 why they believe. And why not? Because they talked to some atheist when they were 14 and they realized that none of their reasons stand up to scrutiny. If you ever manage to drill down to it, it's always some combination of fear, anecdotal experience, and cognitive dissonance. You know, the kind of shit that just doesn't sound convincing if you say it out loud. That's why they love to couch mundane shit like, you know, I was bummed one day and a guy bought me a coffee for no reason with a grandiose title like, God has intervened in my life. You know, because if

they just said, I believe in God because a dude bought me coffee, they couldn't even take themselves seriously. But if you dig deep enough, it's always going to be something that lame. You know, they'll tell you about an experience with the divine, but then when you demand specifics, it turns out that they're describing the exact same feeling you get when you see the latest Pluto pics from New Horizons, or look at a galaxy through a telescope, or realize that massage actually is going to turn into a handjob. I mean, how many times has somebody told you about hearing God speak to them, and then when you ask for details, turns out their God sounds an awful lot like the voice that tells you to skip the extra jalapenos this time.

And then, when you point out that this experience they're using to justify a logically incoherent position is one that you've had and you can explain away without invoking space carpenters, they'll start subtracting adjectives. You know, they'll start getting less and less specific until they've created some phenomenon that completely defies description but definitely means there's a god. And what's more, they'll assert that if you'd had the same experience, you would come to the same conclusion. Now isn't that just stupidity's favorite stronghold, right? I know what I experienced. Oh, I know what I saw. Oh, so you're the one that's immune to optical illusions, hallucinations, tricks of the light, and errors of judgment, huh?

That's you? I know what I heard. Oh, you're already familiar with all the noises all the animals make and all the noises that nature makes and all the audio distortions and echoes your brain can create, huh? And you ruled those all out? I know what I felt. Really? Really? Despite the fact that you said you couldn't even describe what you felt, but you definitely know what it is? But no matter how unimpressive these excuses are, they would always rather throw those out than the truth

because the truth is always fear. Most Christians, the literal fear of hell isn't going to stick for too long. Most kids grow out of that if they're not, like, drowning in religion every day of their lives. It's just, it's a concept that's too flimsy to hold up to the scrutiny of a fully mature brain. But if the indoctrination has done its job, that won't matter. Because at a certain point, the fear of hell is replaced by a new fear that's a little less frightening, but a lot more tangible. It's a fear of all the time that you've wasted. It's a fear of all the time that you've wasted.

God has to exist, or you've spent your life dedicated to an imaginary being, trying to win the favor of someone who's not even there. You missed out on all the joyous fornications of your youth and pissed away a finite lifetime, satisfying your curiosity with bullshit instead of knowledge. You know, look, your life is all the eternity you get, and ultimately you're going to be tormented by every minute of it you waste. So even though the church is lying about the answer, they're right about the stakes. If you get the God question wrong, you can spend eternity in hell.

They're talking about you, Jesus. We interrupt this broadcast to bring you a special news bulletin. Joining me for headlines tonight is a man so godless he screams, Oh, you're God, when he comes. Heath Enright. Heath, are you ready to be offensively correct on the God question once again? Always, but that's not what I say when I come, usually. It's Jumanji, isn't it?

Well, only if I'm with Robin Williams. In our lead story tonight, from the Arrested Development in Tennessee file, Decatur County Clerk Gwen Pope and her entire office staff of two other people all resigned from their jobs last week in protest of the Supreme Court decision on same-sex marriage. Thanks to the heroic sacrifice made by these three devout Christians, American God's plan to deny legal marriage status to the bustling hordes of gay couples in central, west-central Tennessee will extend a few more days or as long as it takes to find three entire people capable of handing out paperwork very

slowly i love how all the headlines said entire staff is like three people guys let's keep this in perspective and you can tell they were county clerks too because like the ruling came down on friday but they didn't get their asses in gear to resign until like wednesday of the following week so even when they believe their immortal soul is in peril, they're in no fucking hurry. So I don't get to say this very often, but it does seem like a pretty reasonable system we finally got going for this issue. Yeah, honestly. If you're completely incapable of performing your job without violating federal laws on a daily basis, it might be time to resign. There you go.

Or keep your job and go to hell. Either way is fine. Nobody's judging you or anything. I'm judging. I'm guessing lots of same-sex couples actually prefer it when the clerk is visibly defeated. You feel all gay, impressed, pissed off. Yeah, exactly. I mean, if I was getting gay married right now, I would pay extra for a dejected, homophobic catering staff.

They're all pissed off, serving penis cake against their will. It'd be fun. Raping Jesus one penis cake at a time. Now that is the homosexual agenda. And in goddamn blasphemy laws news tonight, we have more good news from seven lettered countries that start with I and end with E-land. Only six weeks after Ireland's historic vote to legalize same-sex marriage, the technically country of Iceland

finally excised a blasphemy law that was damn near antiquated when Viking settlers first populated their shores in the late 9th century. The effort began as a response to the attack on the Charlie Hebdo offices, so if any Muslims were worried that attack wasn't going to change anything,

here you go. Just bend over and take that like a kid whose mom hired muhammad to babysit it's a fun visual not really i mean not that fun that is the type of cartoon that would win a pamela geller contest okay we can we can agree on that yes all muslims sodomize jewish nine-year-olds in this very subway car paid for by the afdi yeah when the uh municipal tax dollars uh and legal costs so before the measure came up for a vote the three members of the hyper minority party that sponsored the measure took to the floor to offer the same three-word endorsement

je suis charlie reasoning that god was asking for it when he put their country in such a shitty place on the globe the vote passed overwhelmingly and I'm assuming to a long overdue chorus of fuck Jesus. Now, I'm picturing these three crazy people from their fringe lunatic party. They're walking up to the podium to talk before Parliament. Everybody's all pissed. These guys always

they just start yelling about crazy shit like release the classified documents about the whaling cover-up of 86.'s about it definitely seems like that type of party yeah they totally reversed it this time they get up there they're totally solemn they speak perfect french the whole place slowly starts crying and slow clapping yeah no definitely unexpected to underscore how unexpected that eloquence was i should point out that this party is called the pirate party now. Now, this is not like a weird

gin and tonics linguistic quirk where they just happen to have a word in Icelandic that sounds just like pirate. That's the translation. They're the Pirate Party. And just so there's no confusion, the political party's Facebook profile is a cat dressed as a pirate. It's fucking adorable.

Leaning against the wall with his little pirate hook. And in the Hills Have Ideas news tonight, the troglodytic Fredo Corleone of Duck Dynasty, Uncle Cy Robertson, did an interview with the Christian Post last week, during which he called upon his extensive knowledge of killing birds and his cursory understanding of spoken language in order to construct a logical argument that proves atheists don't exist.

Oh. Which is either useless information or we don't exist, so it's useless information. That being said, would you like to hear it anyway? Well... It's kind of fun. Fuck you for putting me in a position where I must either now lie or fuck up your prepared material. So, by all means, of course I want to hear the theological musings of a man who needs a DNA swab to tell which parts of his face are beard and which parts are swamp fungus.

Obviously. Why would I not want to hear what Cy Robertson thinks about atheism? Well, he's prepared all the material we need. According to Uncle Cyrodes, quote, I don't believe there's no such thing as an atheist sick sick. Because there's too much documentation. Our calendars are based on Jesus Christ sick. End quote.

So don't even act like every single human doesn't believe in God because Uncle Si has the documentation to prove it. He's got an E for every single human. Under D for documentation. And his argument goes something like this. The creator of the universe invented a new, slightly less incorrect form of the Julian calendar in 1582 and told the Pope about it. Therefore, anyone that writes on a Gregorian calendar ever since also signed a belief in God contract without realizing it. That's the documentation he's talking about. And in related news, I did the maze on my paper placemat at Katz's Deli last month,

so I'm actually Jewish right now. Who knew? For the time being. Well, and I looked at Jupiter last Friday on July 7th, so that makes me a Greco-Roman pagan emperor worshipping Arabic Hindu, doesn't it? It's the new rules. Seriously, the whole segment, it was like this depressing, real-life version

of Bennett Brower. I've never constructed a logical argument. I don't know how that works. I don't bathe regularly. I'm not sold on the 14th Amendment. I can't count past the gun one. I've never had sex with a woman who has a different last name than I do. Sold on the 14th Amendment. I can't count past the gun one. Yeah, exactly.

I've never had sex with a woman who has a different last name than I do. I don't know how that works either. I often secrete steel wool from parts of my face. I don't know how that works either. It's really weird. And in Australian fuck-hugs news tonight, City Life Church in Melbourne, Australia. Notice I left the R out.

I'm multicultural. Well done. You correctly mispronounced the r out i'm multicultural thank you thank you in melbourne australia anyway they're in hot water over a laughably inaccurate sex ed pamphlet they distributed in local high schools which suggested among other stupidities that women should avoid hugs that last more than 20 seconds as their inferior women brains will be overpowered by the oxytocin that's released and will end up unable to resist fucking the huggy. Now, the school has apologized first for the medieval view of female psychology that informed the pamphlet, and then for all the horny dorks that must have been just clinging to every girl in the school for 20 second intervals ever since this pamphlet started making the

rounds. I guess this explains why Australian funerals always break out into incestuous orgies. No, no, because I'm saying that's not true, but if it was, that would... I guess it doesn't explain the orgy thing. No.

I've only been to the one Australian... It doesn't matter. Moving on. Still a mystery. And as if the concept of hugs releasing brain roofies wasn't disinformation enough, the pamphlet went on to suggest that every time a girl has another sexual partner, she loses hearts from her monogamy meter, and if it drops too low, nobody's ever going to want to fuck her again,

and she'll spend the rest of her life trying to reason with her cats. And I guess now that we've broached the subject of the church's persistent institutional dehumanization of all the people without dicks, we might as well hand things over to my lovely wife, Lucinda. A man wrote the Bible? A horse, which one? If it's a legitimate race. If it's a slut, right?

Cooking can be fun. Hey! I'm proud of a man! This Week in Misogyny. I got an email on Monday from a listener I've been chatting back and forth with for a couple of weeks that just said, This is my problem with feminism. And it had a link to some blog post that a feminist wrote about all the things she's sick of about men. So I read through it, and through most of it, I'm kind of absolutely nodding along with the author. But intermingled with her good points were a couple of points that struck me as indefensible.

Stuff like, I'm sick of men thinking they have the right to be attracted to me. So I sent back a response to the listener that basically said, yeah, that's my problem with feminism too. But my response isn't to abandon the label, speak against it, or brush it under the rug. My goal is to steer it back in the direction I think it should be heading. I'm not trying to tell anyone how to speak or what to say, but I'm a firm believer that the vast majority of men are my natural allies in the fight for gender rights. Most men naturally want exactly what I want,

equal treatment of the sexes. So when feminists lump men into a single category as the enemy, I feel like it waters down the point and it makes it a hell of a lot harder for our natural allies to line up behind us. But I'm also not naive. I also know that there are plenty of guys out there that talk a good pro-women line when there's a vagina in the room and are all raging misogynists the rest of the time. And those guys love to seize on stuff like the three questionable complaints in that

blog post and ignore the other 47 valid points. So when you see this kind of shit, and I'm talking to you guys who don't like feminists, try to keep in mind that if you define a group by the least sensible stuff anyone in that group says, everyone's wrong about everything. If theists went out and found the craziest shit Joe Rogan ever said about religion, then brought it to you demanding an explanation, you probably wouldn't feel all that obligated, even though you and Joe are both atheists. And for what it's worth, I totally agree that all men, and women for that matter, have the right to be attracted to whoever the fuck they care to be attracted to. Anyway, sorry for spending the whole segment on a soapbox, but that point has just been eating away at me all week. So with a solemn promise to get back to covering news stories and making penis jokes next week, I'll hand things back over to Noah and Heath.

Thank you, Lucinda. And in Norwegian wooden news tonight, a Catholic diocese in Norway has finally given the non-child-fucking lawyers in the Vatican something to do after accusations came down from the government that the diocese defrauded the Norwegian taxpayers out of about a million dollars a year over the last five years. How, you may ask? Yeah, really. Well, Norway has some incredibly bullshit provisions carved out for the few floundering religious institutions like a tax subsidy based on church membership,

which, surprise, surprise, is corrupt as fuck. Dumbest idea ever. So if your stupid thing offers a product that it never delivers and also doesn't exist, you shouldn't need a government subsidy. I mean, like, if farmers in Iowa were selling corn futures on planet Krypton, I think they'd find a way to stay afloat without a subsidy. Just don't get caught raping a bunch of kids, and that's a profitable gig. You're all set.

Well, I think you've touched on the problem. Now, between 2010 and 2014, the Oslo Diocese registered about 65,500 new members, and according to prosecutors, as many as 17 out of every 20 were registered fraudulently, leading the government to overpay the diocese by more than $5 million over that period. So that works out to about, oh, I don't know, a dollar per Norwegian. There's only 5 million of them. Isn't the church supposed to provide welfare programs? Yeah, right.

There's another whole reason we give them all those crazy tax exemptions and all the other bullshit privileges they get? Not in Norway. And look, we're talking about one of the least religious countries in the world. Only about 2% of the population goes to church, and there's 5 million of them. So if the Oslo Diocese numbers aren't bullshit, more than half of all Norwegian churchgoers started going to Catholic Mass in Oslo over the last five years. And I've got to assume they didn't offer, like, atheist vouchers for that huge majority of citizens who weren't eligible for the faith stimmy checks that everybody else was getting. Yeah, right, exactly.

They were in a church. And finally tonight, in Tween the Sheets news, Liberty Council founder Matt Staver accidentally gave the sodomite extremists a good idea last week during his appearance on the Crosstalk radio show. on the Crosstalk radio show. After host Jim Schneider pointed out that same-sex marriage rights are about to bring about catastrophic consequences for public education, Staver agreed wholeheartedly, quickly adding, oh yeah, you must

mean how every school system is about to start forcing kids to have sex during their kindergarten class. Yeah, that's absolutely happening. I heard about that too. No, seriously. I mean, it's only supposed to be the gay kids, but still, that's pretty messed up. It's like they've got their own fucking language or something. Schneider says, well, you know, gay people being married, that'll be detrimental to the public schools. I can't even imagine how you're going to connect those two disparate.

Give me, you know, grant me talking snakes, worldwide floods, and a vengeance bearer for bald people, and I still cannot connect the dots of crazy that it takes to get from gay marriage to public education but staver doesn't even miss a fucking beat he's like well sure because now kindergartners are gonna have to gay fuck to get their chocolate milk obviously what is going on in your gray matter way those dots connect with kindergarten that definitely exactly shouldn't have been one of the dots. Wow. So it's nice to see the competition for craziest gay marriage reaction didn't dwindle in week two. No, not at all. Matt Staver actually thinks the Department of Education will soon require teachers to tell their students, quote, hey, you need to experiment as a kindergarten with whether you're male or female. You need to, like, have some experiments and go out and have some same-sex relationships.

End quote. I actually said that. Children being subjected to forced gay sex experiments in the public schools is just yet another example of a secular institution moving in on religion's turf. That's the church's job, people. So, quick recap. That's the church's job, people. So, quick recap.

Now that gay adults are getting married, Matt Staver sees no way around five-year-olds having mandatory butt sex at school. It's inevitable. I think that might be a slight mischaracterization of his opponents on the issue. I don't think big gay even considered forcing small children to sodomize each other at school until Staver said something. Yeah, now that he brought it up. So now it's probably going to be that, too. And the children's books about ass and mouth stuff. Either way, though, we're going to need 30 seconds on the clock. Book ideas for the sodomy education curriculum that now starts in kindergarten at every public school.

Go. Rowdy with a chance of me balls. What about Gay Sops Fables? A collection of homosexual bestialigories. Maybe one fist, two fist, red fist, blue fist? The fist wouldn't be blue. It would be red, though. And for the five-year-old lesbian with a foot fetish, boots and puss.

I'm sure we used Charlie and my chocolate factory for a shit porn at some point, so how about the Dr. Seuss classic, Oh the Places It'll Go? There's no walkin' in my pocket, kid. Happy to see you. Alright, well done. Now that you've thoroughly segued to the

shit porn segment of the show, what about Scattin' the Hat? Oh yeah, and the Hungry Scatapillar. Little House on the Prairie Dog? Hop on Poop? How about Two Girls, One Sippy Cup? Oh, God. Maybe James and the Giant Breach?

Booty and the Bestiality. It's mammals. Or Where the Piled Things Are. Bit of a stretch on that one, I guess. Of Sodomize in men? Journey to the center of the girth? The mouse at poo corner? Everybody poops if you pull out

the anal beads too fast. You know, you let them know so that they won't be embarrassed the first time it happens. No, it happens to everybody, Kim. Don't clench. I think, honestly, though, what we really need to do is finally get some of this sodomy stuff on the internet. Isn't that where all the kids are going these days? Learn about underage, gay stuff? I think, honestly, though, what we really need to do is finally get some of this sodomy stuff on the internet. It's about damn time.

Isn't that where all the kids are going these days? Learn about underage gay stuff. All right, so what about thesecrettindergarten.com? Discrete playdates. And, of course, kindergrinder.com. Same sex. All right, with an all-new appreciation for the fact that we no longer put the transcripts on our website, we're going to close out the headlines for tonight.

Heath, thanks as always. Too much! And when we come back, Eli Bosnick will be here to earn us 6,000 emails reminding us that Ray Comfort is from New Zealand, not Australia. With all the cinematic heft of the please silence your cell phones now reel and all the cultural sensitivity of the mask of Fu Manchu, the new film Audacity demonstrates that

Ray Comfort is a raging dick, and if there was true justice in the world, he'd have to spend the rest of his life passing poisonous jellyfish through his urethra. I have seen children have more fun watching their dogs get euthanized than I had watching this miserable piece of hate speech. And keep in mind that most of the time, those kids had no idea I was about to kill their

dog. Now, under normal circumstances, we try to give Eli at least a month's worth of recovery time after watching a movie as criminally ridiculous as See Me Dance. But when Ray Comfort writes and produces an anti-gay propaganda film that reminds Christians that it's their biblically prescribed duty to tell every gay person they meet that God will burn them in hell for all the butt-fucking, well, those just ain't normal circumstances. So, Eli, welcome back, sir.

Thanks for having me, guys. Okay, so now tell me, where does this rank in the pantheon of the worst things that you've ever seen? And please, include roadkill and defecations in your calculus here. actually did put my dog to sleep and i have to tell you i will choose that and i would put it i would put my current dog to sleep right now i will snap its neck on skype over each of these podcast listeners will get to hear the crunch of a one-year-old pug's neck as it turns 360 degrees rather than listen to Ray Comfort slowly make people uncomfortable in a YouTube montage. Oh, my God. So, like, because I was thinking that should be the ranking of this movie instead of, like, one to five stars.

It should be, like, one to ten euthanized puppies. Like, how many puppies would you rather kill than watch this movie? Right. It's like a what would you do for a Klondike bar, but in reverse. What would you do in order to not watch this movie? Would you kill your dad? Would you take that gun and kill your dad right there? Or would you watch Ray Comfort confuse people by asking them to read passages out of a Bible and then pretend that they agreed with it, even though they had just read it out loud

because that's what he asked them to do. All right. So that's actually the opening of this movie. We see the chick. She's sitting in her car talking on the phone and the poor man's Michael Chiklis runs up to the window and starts banging. She starts screaming.

He breaks the window and that scene is over. Eventually, we come back to it. I thought that was Michael Chiklis for a while, and I was like, wow. The shield really went downhill. Right. This is rough. Come on, Mike. You can do better than this.

Everyone can do better than this. Yeah, well, and speaking of stage work, that's the next thing we get to in the film. Now it's time for comedy! No, it isn't. This was my favorite part of the movie because I had a great realization during this, is that this must be what comedy is when you can't talk about anything because you're a fucking crazy person. Right. You can't talk about dating or sex or or life for children or joy so you just have

to imitate stuff like a trick dog so that's the comedy they show it's just like and this one here is barack obama and then he's talking to arnold schwarzenegger arnold schwarzenegger's like all right because that's what they talk like help me me. Help me. I've made a terrible mistake. I can't escape my own delusions. And then he goes to his, like, just incredibly racist Indian voice or whatever. Oh, yeah. I wrote down 30 seconds of this movie, two terrible moments of full-on racism. Oh, it was so bad.

And it was, again, no joke. It's just, boy, those folks from India sure sound funny when they talk. Now, and I do think that it's also another interesting look into Ray Comfort's soul that this is what he finds funny. He saw this guy. There were a bunch of other comedians and impressionists. He saw this guy and he's like, oh, that's my guy right there. He's real funny. You should see this thing he does. He talks like Barack Obama, but you've got to understand, he's not Barack Obama. Yeah? He's not Barack Obama in the ring. That threw me at first. I was like, oh my god, it's Barack Obama! And he didn't hear. And I tried to grave him and wrestle him a little bit, but no. No, no, no. Wasn't him.

So when he turns into other people, he's not a demon. Not a demon inside his brain trying to come out as Barack Obama. Yeah? It's not that. He's just pretending to be another person yeah yeah it doesn't make any sense to me either but what are you gonna do the argument this movie makes is when you call us a bigot it hurts our feelings right right that's what they want you to take away from this is not we don't have a good reason for us to be saying these things and which they fucking don't in a movie about why you say these things it's like someone trying to tell you not to get your coat out of the closet in case you fall through to narnia it's like thanks man i got

it now stop trying to create laws that i can't reach you and get my fucking coat i get it you don't have to reach in and get a coat i I'm going to go ahead and snatch my jacket and leave. But Mr. Tumnus! Yeah, I get it. Mr. Tumnus is going to reach out, grab my wrist, and I'll be trapped in there for three years, have to fight a lion, a witch. I read all the crazy books that you did. All right, so then after the terrible comedy, we meet Diana. And when we first meet her, she sitting in a restaurant having a lunch or whatever

with her cardboard two-dimensional friend and the topic of the discussion seems to be exposition yeah no they they talk into the screen like an it's like a second language film like if this were muzzy i'd be like oh i get it they're just communicating information they're just talking about whatever's in front of them i've i've done rosetta stone i'm right this is like a rosetta stone video where they just never include the other language and they do and again they speak entirely in exposition this is the only way they could have included more exposition in these opening scenes is if Ray Comfort had just sort of stumbled out in front of the camera like the

fucking Emperor's New Groove llama and been like, alright, here's the deal. Alright, I'm just going to let you in. She's a lady. Gonna be a lesbian. And then this is a man. Yeah, they're friends. He's a comedian. She's just a lady.

Didn't really think of anything for her. They're going to watch some of my YouTube videos, and you're going to watch them watch my YouTube videos. Doesn't that sound terrible? All right. Back to my crazy movie, y'all. And then he poofs away. That's the only way this could have been more obvious,

and it would have been more entertaining. Any change that you made would have made this movie better. So they go, so they're at the office and she's sitting there and she's doing that, you know, maybe it's experience in community theater, but there's that person who can't act doing something before another person walks into a shot thing, kind of acting.

Emphatically eating out of their bowl of cereal. I could watch it for 95 hours where just this person who cannot act and be in their own skin is just like and then i cereal and mouth i bet this cereal is delicious and then he walks in she's like oh my god i was alone on camera for like four seconds you don't know but there's like a pool of urine underneath me from the idea to be alone on the camera. And I was just putting cereal in my face like I'd never eaten before. So he comes in and they're chatting and she's like,

how's your day? And they're kind of flirting. They're kind of flirting, but I can never tell if anyone's flirting in Christian movies because no one wants to fuck each other. They just instantly want to get married and then rape babies back and forth. So they come and sit down and she goes oh, what are you looking at that?

And he like gets embarrassed and he goes oh, just the Bible. Just like just casually e-reading the Bible. And she acts like he just said shit porn. I'm looking at shit porn. Everyone in this movie reacts to the word christian the way normal people react to the word rapist right if you can you can play a fun

game where you just shout rapist when everyone says christian and all the characters on screen react the same because they'd be like oh i'm actually a rapist. And she's like, Oh, that's fucking. Oh, why did you tell me that? Oh, you should be in jail. You should be in jail. And she says, well, you know, my sister is gay.

And he's like, what? And again, the only argument they make is just like, well, you could stop picking on us. Cause you know, just cause we want to take away your liberties. doesn't mean that we don't have feelings.

And I'm just like, cry me a fucking river, you little bigot. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, she goes, do you believe gay people should be stoned? And he absolutely says nothing like no. He says nothing to correct her and leaves. That's it. Yeah, he doesn't go, oh no. And then he drives his bike straight to a lesbian elevator.

I totally don't believe that. He goes, well, it's a little bit more complicated than that. No, it's fucking not. Nope. It's 0%. When someone asks you, it's a fun, moral, handy dandy. You can tattoo this on your ball sack and do an avasana every time you need to check the answer on this one. If anyone asks you, should X be stoned for Y,

the answer is no. The answer is always no. This is not a tough question. Do you wear a rim, someone, after they've eaten Indian food? No. Should anyone get stoned for anything they do? No. Except maybe make this movie.

Exactly. No, except maybe make this movie. So after the ambiguous answer to the death to gays question, he hauls ass over to make this delivery, and he winds up in an elevator with a couple of lesbians. And of course, the lesbians can't kiss or do anything too gross to freak out the audience, so they're holding hands. That's how we know people are gay in this movie. They're holding hands, and they're smiling and happy they are the most likable people in this movie they really are yes peter's like what are you guys doing we're

lesbians yeah exactly how's your day going just munching some carpet and getting married to ruin yours so he takes the and now first of all keep in mind that we've got a a malfunction with the elevator that's like it stops and the doors won't open and the next time someone gets on it it's going to plummet to their they're going to plummet to their death i don't know how this happens with an elevator but it does well the doors are attached to big scissors and so when you push them open they slip the top and it falls i mean i'm no scientist but i'm pretty sure it's like a yeah exactly exactly the white spy had been through there earlier uh or something along those lines so so peter comes back around and he sees that his danger

deadly elevator sign has been removed by these christian who is slightly more bigoted than him and they actually go into this slow motion six million dollar man run and he goes no and they go yes and they fall to the bottom of the elevator and die and you just hear the fucking sound effect you don't see anything and then peter wakes up and it's all a dream and we have no idea how much of what we've seen now is a dream. There's no cue whatsoever. The whole movie. I wrote, it was all a dream.

What a weird dream. What a terrible movie. Right. So upon having this horrible dream, whatever, Peter wakes up and he decides he needs to figure out, God's trying to send him a message that he needs to learn how to tell gay people that they're going to hell correctly. So he Googles that. Yes. He Googles how to speak to

and then he pauses and I wrote fish. No, no, come on, stay focused. Gay people. You just really want to be Aquaman. Just a fish jumping out of the water next to a gay couple. You guys are want to be Aquaman. Just a fish jumping out of the water next to a gay couple. You guys are going to hell.

And of course, what does he get when he Googles how to berate fags? He gets... Half of the movie. Yes, exactly. He gets half of the movie in montages because they were too lazy to fill out a 49-minute movie with all movie. It's all people realizing they're talking to a crazy person. They're obviously at a music festival or in the park. They're doing something. And someone comes up and goes, what do you think of gay marriage?

And they all, because they're New Yorkers or wherever they're from, go, yeah, gay marriage is great. We're all in favor of gay marriage, being gays. You're born being gay. And then he starts to ask crazier and crazier questions so what this actually is footage of is people getting uncomfortable and trying to end the conversation by agreeing as quickly as possible and i've done it homeless guys are like hey man what time is it 443 sure is hot out there yeah it's pretty hot you know it's because they put airplanes full of chemicals in those chemicals. And I'm like, yeah, man, totally.

Right. It's like if that guy made a movie to prove that we all believed in airplanes full of chemicals. Now, this is me talking to a gentleman who was just trying to eat lunch at work. And you can see he definitely agrees. Yep. Yep, airplanes full of chemicals. Wow, this elevator's taking a while that's all these things are and it's just it's one of these it's so clearly people not having the

the the ability to communicate to him that they disagree and are uncomfortable because they'll be like yeah so you know all right i want you to read this it says here uh spider-man spider-man does whatever a spider can yeah so would you say would you say you can do whatever a spider can yeah would you and they're like oh i mean yeah obviously like according to that so yeah yeah yes spider-man can do whatever a spider-man can yeah but you're not spider-man oh yeah you're not spider-man well i mean nobody's spider-man oh but he says right here in this comic book can you read that um spider-man spider-man would you sing it spider-man i actually i gotta go meet my friend and this one clip keeps coming back.

It's a gay woman, and she goes, I really appreciate the loving, kind way you've put this. And what she means is, thanks for not screaming fag at me. Right, right. Because that's the only good thing she can think of in that horrible interaction she had at Ray Comfort, is him just not being like, get out of here! You're a witch! I'm going to ban you being like get out of here you're a witch

i'm gonna ban you i'm gonna ban you with a cigarette give me give me so she's like so she's doing the like gold star for not trying to bite my foot yeah he's like and they show it through the movie like she has changed like she is no longer gay right yes basically that's the closest anybody comes to saying yeah yeah, whatever, whatever. And then he acts like, see, I just taught my person how to be gay. Now they're straight, and they'll take the dick like they're supposed to. And they're like, yeah, we will leave. Just go away.

You first, though. You have to leave. You have to go first, and then I'll get a right on that. I really will. And see, now, up until this point, this has just been another really poorly put together stupid, horrible movie. But when you start getting to the YouTube clips, this is where I stopped having fun. You know, because this, like, it was still. Were you having a lot of fun until this point? Well, I mean, like, I have fun with just. The murder part in the elevator was fun.

Yeah, that was hilarious. Like, no, but I mean, I have fun with bad. At least that you can jerk off to. Yeah, exactly. But this part, you put two lesbians in an elevator. I'm jerking off. It's really uncomfortable for them when they're in the elevator with me. But hell, we all have needs.

That's why you scream this isn't about you at night. Right. So they understand. This is even worse than when Ray Comfort came up to us the other day. It's your message, mess. No, it's not. No, it's not. No, it really – Sir, go ahead.

None of them would have watched me jerk off in an elevator rather than continue that conversation, man or woman. But that's kind of like where I realized, okay, this movie has gone way beyond the kind of – like in Persecution, right? They were obviously talking about gay marriage and gay stuff, but they were kind of skirting around it and being at least somewhat culturally sensitive to it this movie threw all that shit out in the out of the window and just became blatant fucking hate speech right about at this time just went on it they were just like pulled no punches and all about it and the thing is all of the points in the YouTube montages, which, by the way, let's just appreciate the fact that Ray Comfort

made a movie about people watching his YouTube videos. How fucking crazy do you have to be? There's actually a goddamn spot in this movie,

right about here, actually, where there's just a series of montages of clips of people saying that Ray Comfort makes sense. Right, and all out of context, too.

Yes. So he could be like, excuse me, is that the L-I-R-R? Yeah, yeah, no, that's it. That makes sense. Great, okay of context too yes so he could be like excuse me is that the lirr yeah yeah no that's it that makes sense great okay good wonderful right and there's the one guy who's like wow man you really changing my mind right now i would love for you to leave i would just love for you to leave oh my mind is so totally changed if you were to leave i don't know how much more changed my mind could get if you were to go far far away from me and let me finish my my lunch alone where you are not oh god it was so fucking bad but don't worry we'll get back to more ray comfort youtube in a minute

but now peter armed with this ray comfort information goes back to work now keep in mind that we knew this was a dream sequence. We have no idea how much was a dream sequence, so we still don't know, really, if the conversation he had with her was part of the dream. We have no reason to believe it was, but apparently it was. So he comes up to her,

and this is how he opens the conversation with her. Mm-hmm. Do you have a dyke sister? Is your sister a lesbian? Yeah. Because I dreamed that she was. I dreamed your sister was gay. And let me tell you, I've used that as an opening line a lot of times.

It does not go over well. Mace takes forever to get out of your eyes, guys. Just listen to Eli and learn from my mistakes. I dreamed your sister was gay is a real bad way to open a conversation. And in their second conversation, again, she says to him, she says, doesn't the Bible also say you should stone adulterers? Like, doesn't the Bible say a bunch of crazy shit?

And he goes, funny you should say that, because poof! Yeah, right. Huzzah! Jingly keys! Jingly keys! Just don't put it in the, movie you don't have a good answer don't put it in a movie when my girlfriend comes home and i'm hanging from my neck by a belt i don't try and explain it i just i just don't talk about it yeah exactly exactly exactly if she doesn't ask you don't offer it

you finish up and you move on it's like ray doesn't yeah exactly it's like ray doesn't ask, you don't offer it. You finish up and you move on. Yeah, exactly. It's like Ray doesn't understand that he controls what everyone says in this movie. He controls what all the characters say. Sorry, I was moving around from the asphyxiation orgasm a little too quickly. I have bad habits. It's better to go too quick than too fast or too slow on that one. He'll pass out as you stand up. Exactly. Now, in this second YouTube montage, this was the point in the movie where I just grabbed my pencil like a child grabs a crayon and wrote, fuck this asshole across my nose.

Because, okay, at one point, one of the people he's talking to says, well, if God hates people being gay so much why did he make me gay this is ray's answer and i went back and wrote this down this is verbatim ray's answer the exact same reason he made adulterers fornicators thieves and murderers those were his exact words being gay is like stealing and murdering that's what he's saying to a person who'd already told him he was fucking gay i i liked it because the react just the expression on the guy's face as ray is saying it again there there is no worse cinematic choice if you want to train an army of bigots than to watch someone's feelings get hurt as you express your fucking crazy opinions because there's no there's nothing that's going to discourage people more than watching that poor fucking guy's face just crumple

as Ray Comfort's like, yeah, you're just like a murderer. Yes. You're just like a murderer. And he's like, oh, you're a fucking nutbag, aren't you? Oh, my God. But why do you get a vote, you fucking nutbag? Oh, my God.

It's just, and again, everyone in these youtube videos is so is like oh well there goes my phone what's that oh my batman has got to go to harm friends sorry man gotta go looks like I'm having a stroke. For simple what a day. Or maybe they could use the excuse that Diana uses when she's watched

this video montage. She has a question about God, another one that they don't bother actually answering. She turns to him and she says, Well, okay, I have a question for you about this whole Jesus nonsense. My brother has real bad cancer why would god do that so weird just one more thing before you go peter it's not a big thing but

i hate god so much so much since you're claiming to be an expert on god i have some questions about uh why we killed my brother i love the too, that he has real bad cancer. That's how she refers to it. I guarantee you they were like, what kind of cancers are they? Well, there's the real bad kind, right? That's the one that kills you. Well, that's what we want.

All right, put it in. That's what we want. Conversation over. The key here is really that people watch a bunch of people on YouTube be made uncomfortable as I get a microphone as close to their face as possible without getting arrested. Anyway, so they go into the store

and here's our cast of characters in the store. We have very obvious gay couple. They're holding hands. Straight couple. And the guy with the words armed robber tattooed across his forehead stalking back and forth in the potato chip aisle looking menacingly.

Again, they're just like he could have he could have been dressed as yosemite sam and they would have been like yeah no that's a little too subtle again just ray comfort crawling out in front of the camera you see there see there he's a sketchy fella what's he up to he's the fairy bad to find out tune in tune in yeah yeah would have been so much better and then peter evangelizes his way out of the robbery it goes to show you how boring it is to be evangelized to that an armed robber would rather be like oh no i don't want to actually don't want to be near you i'm gonna go ahead and take another hostage no i'm a christian and I want you to shoot. Yeah, no, I get it. I get it. I'm on a bunch of meth right now and I'm the second least pleasant person in this room to be around right now. And I'm threatening to murder everyone.

The Indian guy behind the counter is like, he's right. You know, it's actually a lot better. At least if he shoots me in the face, I'll be dead. I won't have to watch a Ray Comfort video. You get it? Because that's what they sound like. Got a future in stand-up comedy. I think so. I think so, sir. So he gets distracted by the cops coming out.

And because the guy's white and he's holding a gun to someone's head, the cops don't do anything. Right. That's probably why they didn't make the character black. You guys better back up. One of these lives doesn't matter, so go ahead and open fire. Oh, I didn't realize they were in Cleveland. All right. Oh, I didn't realize they were in Cleveland. All right.

So and then, of course, yeah. So Peter comes out from behind with a can of spinach, guys. You get it? Because somebody said Popeye earlier in the movie. I didn't get it because I fell asleep. So now if you're curious what Diana was doing, after being shown the hate speech videos by Peter earlier in the day, she's gone home and is now like addictively watching Ray Comfort videos the way I watch you porn. Right.

Yeah, exactly. She's doing what everyone who listens to this podcast does with Intelligence Squared debates, but she's doing it with crazy. Ray. He's just like, well, listen,

I'm going to play some games on armor games. I'm going to listen to Sam Harris beat up William Lane Craig in the background. Oh, it's so good. Oh, that's a, that's a great one.

That's a great one. Yeah. But instead, but instead I just want to hear an Australian man bother teenagers. Just like, you know, I've been thinking about it. All right. Right. So, you. Just like, you know, I've been thinking about it. All right, right.

So you know how sometimes, right? You know how you're a murderer? I'm not. I'm not a murderer. You know how you're a murderer then? Look at this book. There's this, in the third montage, we're now on the third montage. It's where he's basically telling people to tell him that they're going to hell.

Yeah. He's like, so the book says you're going to hell. You're going to hell. And's like so the book says you're going to hell you're going to hell and everyone it's so edited everyone's like i guess the book says i'm going to hell and he's like yeah gotcha yeah gotcha the last words where i'm going to hell so right and the guy goes well how would i not go to hell and he's like well you take a magic magic spill you wave it around your head and the woman woman who is a Christian is like, listen, Christ is my Lord and Savior. That's all I need, which I'm, well, but sure. And he's like, no, no, no, no, that's not enough. It's not enough.

You got to read it. Spot him in. Spot him in. Does whatever a spider can. I get it. He does whatever a spider can. Uncle Ben died for your sins. I get it. I does whatever a spider can. Uncle Ben died for your sins. I get it.

I get Uncle Ben died because he didn't stop the guy. This is the worst. I just want to go back to my music festival. Oh, my God. These poor people. And then when somebody doesn't understand what he means by saying the Lord's name in vain, he gives him the example by saying, you know, like you say, oh, my God. Like the guy has to spell the fucking word

out like a nine-year-old. Right, exactly. Like, he doesn't want his toddler to know he's going to the zoo. Right. And his toddler is the creator of the universe. Well, I don't want to make him mad, right? But I want to F-U-C-K Y-O-U

in the A-S-S. Yeah? yeah now god doesn't know how to spell very good because he's not real right and his vision's based on movement so maybe if we hold real real still god won't see these two sinners yeah when he comes by with his magic laser guns yeah starts frying people up not laser guns shrimp lazy guns. Shrimp on the baby. You know how it is. It's fucking crazy. Now, Peter has just saved the gay people

with his can of spinach or whatever. And they invite him to dinner. So we go to dinner. At a restaurant that has nothing but hot sauce. That's the theme. At TGI Fridays. They take them to a not nice version of TGI Fridays. Oh, right, yes.

And at that dinner, the most offensive thing in the movie to me happens. He does that, here's a $100 tip, but it's actually a Jesus-like thing. God, fuck you. Fuck, fuck those people. As people, everyone here I think at some point has worked in the service industry way too long fuck you yes there is no better way for me to put the fluids that were once in me into your beverages and or food than to do that to me there's you could be like hey man can i suck your dick and you have less chance of having my cum inside your mouth than if you give me that $100 thing with the jesus pamphlet on the back i'm just letting you know i'm letting you know

you get my mouth babies it's the fucking and so the gay guy so the the one of the gay guys is totally reasonably offended by the fact that he starts to prophylatize to them. Right. He starts handing them pamphlets about how they're going to go to hell because they're gay. Right. And he's like, hey, you know what? I don't think this is a good idea. We should leave.

I don't really want to read any of your fucking literature. And again, the argument this movie makes is like, but we really like it when you read our literature. It's like, I don't give a... Again again cry me a fucking river who gives a shit and then he turns to his boyfriend and he's like don't bring this home to which the gay partner responds oh i'm probably not going to it's just i already ordered the cheese sticks so yeah, you know. So they fucking, so then, then they, the one reasonable member of that couple leaves, and they have a talking about Jesus montage. Yes, they do. And they have a talking about Jesus montage because there's nothing to say.

Right. So they have to have a montage. So it's just like making really good points. And the gay guy nods. He nods because all these points are so great. He's witnessing to him. Oh, that's a good point right there. Maybe I don't like dudes.

Witnessing montage now. I mean, like the whole movie is about how to talk to gay people as a Christian. And then when you actually get to the point in the movie where he's a Christian talking to a gay person, yes, it's just a musical montage of, he's probably saying some pretty smart shit right now. That gay guy looks pretty convinced, doesn't he? It would be like if at the end of all the Rocky movies,

we just cut to a montage of someone watching and the guy being like, yeah, Rocky's doing pretty well. Right. Oh, yeah, yep. It appears that he is much better at boxing than he was at the beginning of the movie. And he's won. Seems to be getting straight.

He's won. And he's won. There you go. Except for Rocky V when it's a street fight. Oh, yeah. The best of the Rocky films. One more round. Best of the Rocky films.

Ding, ding. It was so bad. So she drives by, and then she runs out of gas. So she parks on these train tracks, and she makes this phone call where she's like, Peter, I've been thinking about what you said, and I really want to talk to you about it. And then the hitchhiker guy,

so he's banging on the window, and this is the scene from the beginning again where she's like, and so he smashes the window and drags her out just as a train hits the car, which, again, we do not see because this movie does not have the budget to hit a car with a train. Basically, they have the budget. If we had to put a train crash into this show, it would have been on the same budget they had.

So, yeah. Oh, yeah. Ray Comfort just did all the Foley sounds himself. Just him alone. He's being like, oh, no, here comes a train. Clippity, clippity, clippity, clippity, clippity, clippity. Complish. And it hits into your car.

I'm a car. Oh, no. Run, run, run, run, run. Run, run, run, run, run. Oh, can't get away. Clippity, clippity, clippity, clippity. And then he listens to her voicemail. Peter listens to her voicemail after he's done fucking killing it

with his Willy Wonka impersonation. And it turns out that she was a lesbian the entire time. Oh my god, yes. The woman that he was showing gay hate YouTube clips to at work turns out to have been a lesbian. That's the twist ending of this movie.

What we see, we first, we see her, like, we're looking at her desk, so we see the pictures of her with her lesbian girlfriend. And then we see her open Bible, and it's open to 1 Corinthians. The passage, this is the passage about, you know, neither homosexuals nor fornicators nor whatever. And like fornicator and homosexual are highlighted, underlined and circled. And we stay on that for, I think I counted it out. It's like nine seconds that that's on screen. Well, they got to let all the audience sound that word out. Everyone who's watching that movie has to be like, That's like an act of this movie right there. Fornicators.

Forminute. Forminishmaters. Forment. Sweet potatoes. Sweet potatoes. Do you know sweet potatoes aren't allowed into heaven? No, wait. Wait, good.

They're keeping it up there. Fornicate. Oh, right. I get it. Oh, I know that one. Me and everyone else who isn't a crazy person. Right. Oh, I get it. Oh, I know that one. Me and everyone else who isn't a crazy person.

Right. So, now, just in case you didn't catch the metaphor we were going for with the train, which is even when big crazy guys come slamming at your fucking window, sometimes they're trying to help. Just like Ray Comfort is a big crazy guy slamming a microphone against people's faces. He's just trying to help. But in case you didn't get that, we get it explained to us four times in the last 60 seconds of this fucking movie.

One of which is in a news report where she's like, I'm a news reporter. A good Christian was trying to save a lesbian woman. She didn't want to be saved, but sometimes when you don't want to be saved, it's better to get saved. I'm a news reporter. For News McNews reporter,

I'm not someone's cousin, news reporter. The good news is that it's mathematically impossible for the next movie that we review to be less enjoyable than this one unless you have to get bitten in the nuts to see it. So until then, Eli, thanks for suffering alongside us once so until then eli thanks for

suffering alongside us once again oh thanks for having me guys before we shut the fuck up tonight i wanted to offer an all too infrequent thanks to all the listeners that help us out every week by sending us news items ideas for 30 seconds bits ideas for top 10s and concepts for skits i honestly don't think we could manage without you guys and gals. There's way too many of you to thank by name, but you know who you are, and I hope you know how much I genuinely appreciate your help and how awesome I think your vaginas and or dicks are. Anyway, that's all the blasphemy we've got for you this week, but we'll be back in 10,022 minutes with more. If you can't wait that long, be sure to check us out on Facebook and Twitter for

occasional bonus nuggets of scatheism. Obviously, I need to thank Heath, the Michelangelo of Dick Jokes Enright, for his tireless efforts to make this show great. I need to thank the lovely Lucinda Lusions for not having me committed when I spent an hour screaming fuck this asshole at my computer this week. I need to thank Eli one more time for the film review equivalent of self-flagellation. And of course, I want to thank Skeptomite of the Brisbane Skeptic Society for providing this week's Farnsworth quote. If you're interested in finding out more about the Australian Skeptics Convention, you'll find a link on the show notes for this episode at skatingatheist.com. But most of all, of course, I need to thank this week's most venerable vertebrates, James, Brian, Curtis, John, Heather, Kevin, Christina, Corin, Richard, Paul,

Matt, and Chad. James, Brian, Curtis, and John, whose cocks are so mighty they can't convert to Judaism until moils get lightsabers. Heather, Kevin, Christina, and Corin, who are so bright you can determine their chemical composition with a spectrometer, and Richard, Paul, Matt, and Chad, who are so virile the stripper doesn't even need a pole. Together, this congregation earn commendation when they hasten the expiration of predation and exploitation from the orations of damnation, not to mention the molestation, as well as the separation of education and indoctrination with an augmentation of our accumulation of communication, telling the zealous to go procreation themselves by giving us money.

Not everybody has the bona fides it takes to give us money, but if you'd like to feed us your bona, we'd be happy to take it. You can make a per-episode donation at patreon.com slash scathingatheist, or you can make a one-time donation by clicking the donate button on the right side of our homepage at scathingatheist.com.

And remember, the only reason we're able to keep doing what we're doing is because so many of our listeners have chosen to generously support our efforts, not like there's a long list of advertisers lining up to sponsor the Fuck Jesus and Rape Puppies show. So all jokes aside, to all of those who currently support the show or ever did, thank you so much for letting me do what I love to do. If you have questions, comments, or death threats, you'll find all the contact info on the contact page at skatingatheist.com. All the music used in this episode was written and performed by yours truly. And yes, I did have my permission.

used in this episode was written and performed by yours truly and yes, I did have my permission.