The Scathing Atheist - ScathingAtheist169: Godless Rock Edition

Episode Date: May 12, 2016

On this week’s episode, There’s a child marrying convention that Eli isn’t a keynote speaker at, North Carolina gets asked if they wanna secede, and Steve and Tally Cass from Monster on Sunday will be here to rock your f-cking world. Guest Links: Check out Monster on Sunday’s website and don’t forget to use the promo code. Learn more about Reason Rally. Get tickets to the Crystal City after party. Our Links: Click Here to make a per episode donation at Patreon.com Click Here to buy our book. Click Here to check out The Skepticrat. Click Here to check out God Awful Movies. Farnsworth Quote: If you’d like to check out Pie Studios, Click Here. Headlines: Tow Truck driver claims religious liberty after refusing service to disabled Bernie supporter: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2016/05/05/tow-truck-driver-says-god-told-him-to-leave-a-disabled-woman-stranded-due-to-her-bumper-sticker/ Roy Moore suspended pending investigation into ethics violations: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2016/05/06/judicial-tyrant-roy-moore-is-suspended-for-his-obstruction-of-alabama-same-sex-marriage-licenses/ A child marrying convention involving the duggars http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/duggar-cult-founder-plans-kansas-retreat-to-set-up-arranged-marriages-for-teen-girls/ (event later cancelled) http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2016/05/05/christian-mans-retreat-to-arrange-marriages-for-kids-has-been-canceled/ Justice Department is like ‘hey man you dont get to make up hate laws” http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/us-justice-department-notifies-nc-gov-pat-mccrory-that-anti-gay-bill-violates-civil-rights-act/ Gordon klingenschmitt says gays want to have sex in your guest bedroom http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/gordon-klingenschmitt-gays-will-demand-have-sex-your-guest-bedroom Kassig doesnt know if people are born gay: http://www.rawstory.com/2016/04/john-kasich-gets-defensive-when-asked-if-people-are-born-gay-i-dont-know-how-it-all-works/ TN pastor: Scientists are abandoning evolution in favor of UFOs, therefore god: http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/tennessee-pastor-claims-all-scientists-are-abandoning-evolution-for-ufos-and-aliens-which-is-god/ Mayor of Jackson insists his “pray the potholes away” strategy is working http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2016/05/06/mayor-of-jackson-mississippi-insists-god-is-fixing-the-citys-potholes/ Musical about the pope http://www.rawstory.com/2016/04/john-paul-ii-superstar-polish-writer-readies-biographical-musical-about-late-pope/ This Week in Misogyny: Chick calls pregnancy the silver lining for rape http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/gop-lawmaker-calls-pregnancy-gods-silver-lining-rape Pastor  allows cop to abuse teenage girl for four months (TWIM) http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/pastor-allowed-san-antonio-cop-to-sexually-abuse-teenage-girl-for-four-months-police/ Alabama law makes it easier for pedophiles than women’s clinics http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/a-new-alabama-law-would-make-life-easier-for-sex-offenders-than-womens-clinics/

Warning, the following podcast contains some pretty raunchy shit. This week's episode of The Scathing Atheist is brought to you by the new Pro-Life Adoption Service for online RPG characters that get abandoned. Second life after death. Are you thinking about terminating an online player account? Well, you're not alone. And we want you to know that there are other options. you're not alone and we want you to know that there are other options just remember by the time you create a profile they already have thumbnails second life after death a second life begins at conception and now the scathing atheist hi this is nels jensen from the pie studios.com and we did

in fact evolve from filthy monkey. It's Thursday. It's May 12th. And if the Jews started all the wars, World War II was a bad choice. Regretting that one. I'm no illusions. I'm Eli Bosnick. I'm Heath Enright. And from double-double-wide, animal-style Valdosta, Georgia, this is The Skating Atheist.

On this week's episode, there's a child-marrying convention that I'm not a keynote speaker at. Oh, good. There's a child-marrying convention that I'm not a keynote speaker at. Oh, good. There's a child-marrying convention that I'm not a keynote speaker at. And Stephen Telecast from Monster on Sunday will be here to rock your fucking world. But first, the diatribe. Yeah, I've got to say, I have never been happier to be a part of this movement. I don't even know what this movement is, to be honest. You know, this weird amalgamation of atheists, skeptics, secularists, whatever it is. It's an inspiring thing to be a part of.

You know, the theists like to argue that atheism is turning into a religion, or that it already has. Kind of weird that religious people would try to insult us by calling us them, but whatever. And I've also heard a few atheists echoing this same thing, you know, more as a warning than an aspersion. And I guess I see what they're trying to say, even if I don't agree with it. They're saying that we're creating an insular, self-selected community, and by so doing, we're bound to create leaders and dogmatism, and we're going to otherize and factionalize and otherwise naturally evolve into the very thing that we're fighting against. But they are wrong, because you're way too awesome for that,

and I learned that in dramatic fashion this week. So let's start off with the word religion, right? What the fuck is a religion? If we're turning to a religion, let's define what that means. Now, obviously, you got your dictionary definitions and shit, sure, but when you listen to a couple of philosophers try to pin this down, it feels like you're playing Jeopardy and Wonderland. So for the purposes of this discussion, we're going to be super generous to the doomsayers who warn of atheism's inevitable religionization. And we're going to go with the most basic aspects so that we can use the widest possible

definition. The one thing that all religions share in common is the sacred, right? Something's revered and unquestionable. Something's absolute. Something is sacred. That's something that and unquestionable something's absolute something is sacred that's something that all religions have and basically no non-religions have now i mean i guess you could argue that certain political organizations and movements have a sacred like a sacred text or whatever but you could further argue that they start to morph into religions at that point it's this is a discussion that takes us way too far afield so let's just knock that

off for the second and assume that they're right, that these, you know, atheism is going to be a religion, two guys are right. And despite our best efforts to the contrary, all the trappings of religion just naturally grow up around us, okay? What would be the sacred? Now let me leave that question hanging in your ears for a minute

and tell you about my inbox this week. On last week's diatribe, I made some controversial statements on mythicism and ruffled the feathers of a lot of listeners. And I knew that I would. I said as much during the diatribe. made some controversial statements on mythicism and ruffled the feathers of a lot of listeners and I knew that I would I said as much during the diatribe and to be fair several listeners raised what I thought were really valid objections to the wording that I used in that diatribe and a few of them raised valid objections to the actual points that I was making and I'll address several of those in the feedback segment at the end of the show but there

were also some we're going to say not so valid objections offered up as well and look every group of people has bad arguers in it. I'm not saying this is something specific to mythicists. That's just the group that I pissed off last week. So I got to meet a lot of their bad arguers and not to be overly derogatory, but a lot of the arguments they made were just a mad living away from the arguments I get from creationists. You know, arguments like, well, here's an educated person with a relevant PhD that disagrees with you. Or, well, you just can't trust anything that comes out of that academic field. Or, I demand that you explain these three disparate facts that you couldn't possibly be qualified to explain.

And I have to be honest, some of this shit was super depressing. You know, I got multiple emails that started off by saying all of biblical scholarship must be ignored because they're all biased augmentists whose objectivity can't be trusted. And then they went on to cite Robert Price or Richard Carrier to defend their position. You know, I thought to myself, how can this not send up a red flag for you as a skeptic? How can you not see that you're asking me to ignore all the people in the field except for the ones that agree with you? Now, again, there were also some valid objections, so I'm not trying to paint everybody who emailed me with the same brush here, and I'm also not trying to imply that mythicists are uniquely able to make shitty

arguments in defense of their position, and that's what's so fucking depressing to me right this is a self-selected group of critical thinkers so why should any of us be relying on logically unsound arguments right especially when we have motivated reasons to believe the thing that's being presented I honestly started to have this crisis moment where I was starting to think that like maybe no amount of foreknowledge of motivated reasoning can truly insulate a person against it. And that amounts to an existential crisis when you're a skeptical movement, right? But then an interesting thing started to happen. Arguments started to get retracted or better or replaced. See, when I write back to a creationist and I say, yes, yes, Dr. Jesus, Jesus does have a PhD in biology and does believe that Jehovah made humans out of clay, but the majority consensus is X, the creationist just ignores that and moves on to argument

number two. And nobody did that. Not a single one of the scores of contentious emailers I incited last week did that. When I pointed out a fallacy in their argument, they retracted it or they corrected it. When they pointed to a fallacy in my argument, I did the same. And in some instances, minds were actually changed. And even when they weren't, meaningful dialogue ensued. Now look, I know that I'm in a position to see the best of this.

I mean, these are our listeners writing, and so they're naturally inclined to agree with me, or at least to look at what I say in the most favorable possible light. I'm not exactly getting a random cross-section of people who disagree with me, and I have no illusions that skeptics are always logically sound in the YouTube comments or anything. Hey, I said no illusions. But the key here, though, is minds did change. Even after contentious arguments, everybody was at least willing to rethink their starting assumptions, and at all times, in every conversation, the evidence was the arbiter. We didn't always agree on the answer, but we always agreed on the right way to get there. We always agreed, well, if you could show me this evidence evidence or if I could show you that evidence, we would change our minds.

And what's more, when minds were changed, they were excited about it. They were proud to be swayed by a good argument. I posted something about it on Facebook, and much to my chagrin, a whole thread popped up below it of people more or less bragging about the last time they changed their mind on a contentious topic. You know, trans rights, capital punishment, corporal punishment, affirmative action, the Oxford comma, gay marriage, double spacing after the period. People proud of their willingness to follow the evidence. People looking for an opportunity to challenge the dogma wherever they saw it creeping in. And that's why I'm not worried about the slippery slope arguments about atheism turning into a religion like it just got bit by a weretheist. Because ultimately, if you have to hold something sacred let's make it that

nothing is sacred they're talking about you jesus interrupt this broadcast and bring you a special news bulletin joining me for headlines tonight are two of slightly upstate new york's finest heath enright and eli bosnick fellas we are all about to be in the same room for the first time since episode four like like this time tomorrow basically in new york yeah i'm gonna throw so many tourists out of the way when they stop at the top of the stairs oh yeah i'm just gonna stand there and wait for people to do that just flying tackles so much i'm gonna spend a day or two doing that new york will love you for it i'm not worried you guys won't like me in person. You're worried. You've been practicing your smile in the mirror for three days.

You have. And by the way, of course, listeners, if you're planning to attend Nexus or the Northeastern Conference on Science and Skepticism this weekend, look for varying levels of us, varying levels of there. Indeed. Very excited. Right. South Carolina tow truck driver and live action King Hippo from Punch Out Ken Shoup made news last week after he refused emergency highway service to a physically disabled woman with Crohn's disease because God told him to. Wow. According to Mr. Shoup, he was just about to perform his fucking job when he noticed a Bernie Sanders bumper sticker on the woman's car and wasn't sure about the Christian thing to do in that situation. At which point, of course, the almighty God of the universe popped into existence. He showed up and he sorted everything out. Of course, of course.

And according to God, disabled liberals are never going to learn their lesson unless they're stranded on the side of the road to think about their actions once in a while. Well, yes, yeah, exactly. That's just a paraphrase of matthew 2540 i believe whatsoever you do under the least of my brothers is legal in south carolina right what is that something about a samaritan that kicks the shit out of a guy for looking at his wife something like that yeah it's been a month all right so here's the explanation from mr shoop quote something came over me. The Eli Bosnick story.

I think the Lord came to me and he said, get in the truck and leave. And when I got in the truck, I was so proud because I felt like I finally drew a line in the sand and stood up for what I believed. End quote. And fun fact, that's also what George Zimmerman said when he got back in his truck. Yeah, right. And same with James O'Reilly. It's a great sentence for getting back in your truck after a hate crime that God apparently gave us. I love that God said get in the truck.

God is an abusive redneck husband. Get in the truck and leave. This is exactly the kind of wisdom I've come to expect from grown men and baseball caps i swear to you if this guy has fewer than six visible pieces of getter done memorabilia in his living room i will chew off my own legs bet not taken it's not accepted what's amazing to me is that this guy was on the news when he said yeah right at this point he must know that people were mad at him don't say you're proud of your shitty thing. Like, I get it before if he said this to his wife. Okay, sure.

But once you're on the news, it's obvious you did a bad thing. Don't tell me how proud you were of your bad thing. It's the Indonesian fuck doll policy. Exactly. And he also mentioned that it wasn't just about God speaking to him. It was also because socialism means that you don't have to pay for stuff. Is that what that means? And yeah, he'd been getting fucked over on that a lot recently, I guess. He explained, quote, every business dealing in recent history with a socialist minded person.

I have not gotten paid. Oh, for fuck's sake. Sounds a lot like a to pay fallacy one can only fathom what this guy thinks is a socialist minded person i'm gonna go ahead and bet that skin color is a better indicator than a howard's collection right i'm gonna throw that out there yeah and uh he also added a lot of the, as soon as they see me start talking, they punch me in the mouth, and then just keep punching me in the big X in my belly,

and I fall down, it's really not fair, because I barely ever get up, somehow he's never realized he's a belt away from invincibility, to fucking dumbass, and transvestites are the ones that hang down from the cave right noose tonight, it looks like the gay godless cross dressers, that Roy Moore warned us about last week got their way moore whose obituary will one day be sung by the lollipop guild was suspended from alabama supreme court while investigators determined whether he did the thing we all saw

him do and then heard him boast about doing and then gave a speech about doing yeah right this is in the bank i have child porn roy mo Moore is a dick. Take the win. Stop saying invest. You don't need to investigate. Well, yeah, I mean, because they're investigating his public efforts to block Alabama clerks from issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples immediately after the SCOTUS said, okay, one thing that's definitely illegal is blocking state clerks from issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

Right. And by the way way they have a team of investigators a team like what does a work day look like for these people right it's just like the spotlight team but they're all just doing the exact same google search for roy moore or they all conference call him in did you do that yes all right So happy hour. I mean brunch, I guess. Seven serving four. Yeah, right. Roy Moore is basically the Rose from Doctor Who of Breaking the Wall.

Hey, Rose, don't touch that button because the time vortex will destroy the touch. But it look like more fava. Anyway, so the important takeaway is that Roy Moore looks like Fred Thompson got raped by Pat Robertson and the resulting embryo was incubated in a laundromat dryer. You're not supposed to put those in there. No. There's a sign in a lot of places. Also, he looks like melanoma with a malignant case of humans growing off the bottom. He does.

Also, he's looking at what I believe would be a world record setting second removal from the bench for ethics violations. At least until they vote him back in. Oh, he can get three he i feel like he's got three in him also a special shout out to friends of the show sandy anderson and nick morgan more a couple of the gay godless transvestites that earned moore's ire last week i know they've done a lot of work and invested a lot of their time and money and repeated efforts to get the bad guy from a blaxploitation movie off of the fucking bench and i certainly hope that they're celebrating now uh you guys have earned it well done it looks like the joker dressed up as clint eastwood yeah man you take down a judge that looks like someone turned a chucky cheese costume inside out and he gives all the credit to the drag queen right classic story bastard

and in no one never lets me go to the fun field trips news tonight, the freedom of silence gets even closer to being a documentary as our evil atheist government canceled a child marrying convention due to take place this week. Wait, child marrying convention or child marrying convention? I guess it doesn't really matter. Is it both? I feel like it's both. Equally horrible? C. D? C. D.

C. All of the above. The convention, which sounds like it was named by Caligula as a way more fucked up form of gladiators, was to be called, and I'm not making this up, Let Them Marry. We were about to wed salute you. Yes. And was presented by quiverful patriarch Vaughn olman who looks like his costume note for life was too creepy to be amish oh god this fucking guy you guys ever play that game uh rabbi left tackle or rodeo clown well this guy is every picture yes this is definitely a guy that

lost his barn raising privileges for whittling a fuck doll anyways the plan of the convention which olman would have gotten away with if it weren't for those meddling kids or maybe not meddling kids i'm not sure anyways it was quote designed to bring together like-minded families and their unmarried young men and women who are committed to young fruitful marriage and to help them overcome the barriers which have kept their children unmarried. End quote. Those barriers, by the way, are the fact that they're children and the law. Right. Just to be clear what those barriers are.

So fucking creepy. And they were going to charge parents $1,200 a head, too. So, Von Ullman, kid pimp. Kidimp kid pimp god i hope that's on his business it almost has to be why would it not be you know it's a good thing he sincerely believes this is okay or you could get in trouble for this shit doesn't it seem like an offshore facility might solve the problem next time i feel like most of the successful child sex traffickers are doing a lot of stuff with boats i feel like there's a successful child sex traffickers are doing a lot of stuff with boats. I feel like they use a lot of boats.

Maybe you could go like Halsey's with Andrew Wakefield or something like that. They bottom deck top deck. Yeah, right. Exactly. Now, Olman, who looks like you don't get to cross the bridge he's guarding unless you can answer his riddle or help him brew his own artisanal beer, insists that people took

the meaning of the event the wrong way because despite the fact that he quotes several religious figures saying that girls can be married at age 12, he's laid out some totally not creepy rules that he and his cult abide by, which again, I'm happy to say, do not in any way sound like they're being yelled down a well at someone he's kidding.

Are you ready for these actual fucking rules this is all a couldn't be more ready okay one the youth ready for marriage has breasts check wow got him two the youth ready for marriage

is ready to bear children I'm out three the youth ready for marriage is one who is ready for sexual intercourse sexually and emotionally. I would have been out either way. And if you're thinking, man, that sounds like something

someone recorded Eli screaming at a Thai brothel owner and not like someone who definitely wasn't trying to sell kids to other kids, then we agree. Next up, we have a new development in our continuing coverage of North Carolina's recently passed House Bill 2. For those who haven't been following the story, that's their new law which aims to preserve the Christian liberty

of knowing that everyone in the state is denying rights to trans people, not just my town. As Jesus commanded. And that liberty was being threatened by anti-discrimination laws in the city of Charlotte, so the state government created a ban on banning things. Well, turns out that's logically impossible. And regardless, you're not allowed to do that,

thanks to a federal ban on band bands oh i see which is why the department of justice had to write a letter to governor pat mccrory last week explaining how laws work and i imagine it had pictures next to the big words you know and like i connect the dots halfway through to keep them interested because how fucking dense does a person have to be to think to themselves you can't not discriminate yeah that's a viable law north carolina basically did the legal equivalent of pulling out a machine gun during an improv scene and killing it so uh this isn't an exact quote but the letter went something like this a paraphrase. Dear governor, you're not allowed to run your state by declaring the only rule is there are no rules.

Can't do that. And the reason for that is because your state is not Thunderdome. Oh. And even if it was Thunderdome, we'd show up and be like, hey, it's the DOJ. You can't have Thunderdome. Just to review, if hate crimes end up being legal after a new law then you weren't allowed to do that there you go for example you can't make laws that say it's illegal to make laws against hate crimes we thought that would have been obvious but you can't do that either well well you can

but it doesn't matter at all they just don't count you're like michael scott declaring bankruptcy out loud that's not yours truly the federal government that has to exist because of people like you yeah states rights my ass yeah so in legalese i believe this is referred to as the we've never actually had to articulate this because you're pushing new boundaries of stupid test everyone involved has a college education he has a degree in political science so fucking depressing and in home sweet homo news tonight colorado state congressman and what happens if you overcook the rush limbaugh shrinky dink gordon klingenschmidt earned his way back on the show last week when he warned that the

end game for gay marriage proponents is your guest bedroom where they'll butt fuck so apparently this my little pony villain in a skin suit took to the series of tubes on a recent edition of his show, Pray in Jesus Name, where he warned that the homosexual agenda won't be satisfied until they can, quote, come right into your home and demand to have sex in your guest bedroom, and there's nothing you can do.

End quote. Well, hold on. In fairness, that's exactly what we're going to do to Eli this week. It's kind of like checkmate clinging schmidt. The scathing atheist story. We already got it. In fairness, that's exactly what we're going to do to Eli this week. Checkmate, Klingenschmitt. The scathing atheist story. We already got it.

Why set up all those cameras? And I love that this is the part of you can't just refuse gay people's service that made it into his brain. It was like, oh, I have to make a cake? Well, then I guess that also means they have to let them fuck in front of me, right? Well, exactly. Well, then I guess that also means they have to let them fuck in front of me, right? Well, exactly. Well, not exactly, though, because, see, just when I thought I'd never have to make up another excuse to hire live-action gay porn troops, this jackass adds on an important stipulation.

Turns out that the only people who get free gay sex in their guest bedrooms are bed and breakfast owners. So, of fucking course, of fucking course, if you rent your guest bedroom out for for fucking purposes people are going to want to show up and fuck in it but i love the way he sets up he goes quote it's not enough that they get gay weddings in their own private churches like i guess gay people have private churches oh yeah they're they're fabulous do not say yes if they offer to baptize you yeah important safety tip anyway the quote continues they want to come to your business they might even come to your home long pause if you are a bed and breakfast owner end quote so but your business still your business and i know what you're thinking i know what you're thinking i am but a simple innkeep the ravaging homosexuals will surely never darken my door.

But no, my friends. Marry a rapscallion sodomite shall enter these premises. Do not delude yourselves, though. Gay people are coming in cars. They're coming in boats. I mean, what about mobile homes and houseboats? Think about it. That's gay people in your house.

Just fucking. Fucking. Straight fucking. So he then went on to explain the supernatural basis of butt sex and how it aligns against all that is holy. Quote, there are also evil spirits influencing them, the gays, to come after the church and we've got to stand up. Not necessarily against the humans. We've got to stand up against Satanan who is inside of them end quote so you know don't hate the sinner hate the magical evil satyr that lives inside the sinner vicariously through the center so this brings up the question you try to talk to satan

instead like you have some mad sassy gay couple yelling at you in your bed and breakfast and you're like i'd like to talk to the man in charge, if you know what I mean. Can you bring him out? Can he materialize? Just tell him to strip off the flesh bags he's used you as. I'd like to speak to him directly. I've got to be honest. I had a bit of a change of heart here because Gokling seemed hesitant to help the Red Skull kill Captain America in the first one.

So I thought maybe he was a good guy deep down, but I'm starting to think I was wrong. I just misjudged him. And in our people-born Kasich news tonight, recent presidential candidate who pulled only slightly higher than Deez Nuts and slightly lower than not getting to vote because you thought registering third party would get you laid, John Kasich, came under fire this week for conducting himself at a town hall meeting like the first time you got too high and someone asked you a question i think he thought this was going to be like the debates like he wasn't gonna have to worry about getting questions

he'd just be able to play chutes and ladders with ben carson the whole time casick who has no idea what he's going to do with all these flyers and buttons was asked about his position on gay marriage by kelly bryan specifically whether or not people were born gay casick who again it must be emphasized was at a town hall meeting voluntarily and knew that people were going to be asking questions said quote i'm not going to get into the analysis of this or that end quote. Taking that strong mom who just wants everyone to have one dinner without fighting policy. Wait, so was his Dodge declining to take a firm position on those things which can be applied to the pronouns this and that? Yeah, classic Dodge, but somebody just needs to ask him about the other.

Oh, right. There's another third of the things. Make him analyze the other part of gay people all choosing to be gay. Trapped. It's okay, because when pressed, Kasich went on to say, I'm not making this up. Probably? I don't know how it all works. Are they? In all probability, they are.

I don't know how it works. Well, you know, according to Gokling, some people are going to show up at your house and show you, brother. Feel like you want me to say no? Yes. I love it. Agnostic homophobia. That's the easiest type to defend philosophically.

Good call. Good call. Some Gaysian analysis from John Kasich. Good stuff. Hard to argue. Other high notes of the evening included casey's apparent reference to anti-trans legislation when he said and again this is all real quotes i assume his last desperate effort is just to connect to me personally

i think we should just try to like take a chill pill relax and try to get along with none another a little bit better instead of trying to write some law to solve a problem that doesn't frankly exist in big enough numbers to justify more lawmaking end quote and with that impression of a sitcom dad trying to get his daughters to stop fighting over a top casing at least we hope, faded into obscurity. Right, right. So while we all work out what more obscure than John Kasich might look like, we're going to take a quick break from headlines and hand things over to my lovely wife, Lucinda.

A man wrote the Bible? A whore is what she was. If it's a legitimate race. It's a slut, right? Cooking can be fun. Hey, I'm proud of a man. This Week in Massage. Cooking can be fun.

Hey, I'm proud of a man. This Week in Massage. You know, sometimes when I'm perusing my inbox in the news sites, the stories start looking so familiar that I wonder if I could just plug a few new names into an old script and save myself the effort of coming up with new shit to say. It's just the same bloviations coming out of different bloviators. For example, I'm going to start off this week with a story so familiar that I had to read it twice just to make sure we hadn't already done this one. Apparently, the Missouri House of Representatives gave preliminary approval to give full legal rights to, quote, unborn human children at every stage of biological development, end quote. An idea so fucking stupid that the first third of

this recording was just me screaming, fuck these assholes, but we'll probably cut that out. Now, luckily, not everyone in Missouri appears to be the result of a night of passion between siblings because Kansas City Democrat Lauren Author pointed out that this measure would make abortion illegal even in the cases of rape and incest, and asked, quote, do you believe that it's just or compassionate to force a woman who's been raped to have the child of the man who raped her, end quote. To which Republican Representative Tila Hubrit, who looks like Dolores Umbridge, decided to take a swing at muggle politics, replied, quote, sometimes bad things happen and they're horrible things,

but sometimes God can give us a silver lining through the birth of a child, end quote. And next up in our series of heard that shit before headlines is a story that involves a priest, negligence, and child sex abuse. This one comes to us from San Antonio where a girl went to her pastor because she was being sexually abused by a local police officer. And her pastor, instead of screaming, holy fucking shit, and calling the cops and her parents right away, decided to counsel her for four months while the abuse continued before telling her parents. the abuse continued before telling her parents. And as someone who has exactly the same qualifications in counseling as a professional invisible friend communicator, I can say that I'm pretty sure that the first thing you do when a 15-year-old girl tells you she's being raped is to tell her parents and call the cops. But I'll have to check the official asshole handbook on that one. Finally, I've got a riddle for you. What do pedophiles and clinics that provide abortion have

in common in Alabama? Well, it turns out more than you'd think because this week a new Alabama law passed that requires abortion clinics to be at least 2,000 feet away from a K-8 school. The same distance, by the way, required for sexual predators. And this makes you wonder, do these assholes in Alabama think that once the killing lust is upon us, we just can't stop? Do they think that if an abortion clinic was allowed near a school, someone might actually walk into the wrong building one morning and accidentally hack apart a kindergartner? Please. But I guess there is a silver lining, as Tila, when they asked me what hairstyle I wanted, I said curly fries, Hubert would say. Because at least this law ensures that children are never exposed to the really terrible things

about abortion clinics. The pro-life shit stains that stand out front waving bloody pictures of veal to demonstrate that this country is still utterly and completely fucked. And on that cheery note, I'll send you back to Noah, Heath, and Eli. Thank you, Lucinda. And in If This Is My Anal Probe Then Where Is My Pen? news tonight, Tennessee pastor and the heckler muppet on the left after Geppetto wished he was a real boy, Charles Lawson, took to the pulpit on Sunday to offer up scientific proof of God that included Bigfoot, UFO sightings in California, spirit guides, and the lost continent of Atlanta continent of Atlanta basically the Ghostbusters job interview but a sermon and you know what I'm just going to go ahead and call this dude C-Laws

because after a rant like this it is clear he's angling for his own page on Right Wing Watch and a couple of 30 second segments down the road so yeah I feel like all he needs is a speech lesson from Pastor Manning that would help because Lawson kind of ignores the homosexual angle here.

That's an issue. And he sounds almost nothing at all like Bobcat Goldthwait in a minstrel show. These are important things to learn. Bobby! How I love you! How I love you! So here's Lawson's argument in a nutshell he starts off explaining that we all know the x files was a documentary series and there's really no arguing about the truth of alien visitations i'm

in and since we all know that aliens come from the sky just like angels they're basically the same thing that's where he starts okay point a got it it's rough when crazier than anything i've ever said is where he starts yeah right hard to catch up but he then goes on to say that scientists a lot of scientists anyway have quote jenison darwin and now they're looking up and past and they're getting into the spirit world into the paranormal world, end quote. Yeah, because once you throw out Darwin, you have to go to another book. And what's another book?

The Bible. The Bible, exactly. So we steal underpants and then profit. I guess. And in holy man news tonight, Mayor Tony Yarber, who always looks like he overdressed for a job interview at Chick-fil-A, doubled down on his pray the potholes away strategy that he announced last August. He looks like Tucker Carlson's lots of black friend.

Here he is, right here. He's real. So for those who don't remember the story, Yarber tweeted, quote, Yes, I believe we can pray the potholes away. Moses prayed and the sea opened up. Hashtag I see ya. Hashtag I trust him. Hashtag prayer works. Last August.

However, it appears. Hashtag pew, pew, pew. Exactly. However, it appears that God only works on Andy Wilson's editing schedule, so this week... Any day now. So this week, the city released a PSA announcing the new program wherein workers will fill the holes as quickly as possible. And since I assume the Eli Bosnick story was taken, they're calling it Pothole Blitz. Oh, really?

Good pick. Sounds like a Nazi version of Mario Kart. You unlocked the Panzer. And the man in the back said, everyone attacking and turned into a pothole blitz. Pothole blitz. The project, which Yarber admits will probably take 10 or 20 years, seems in contradiction to his previous plan of wishing the holes full.

However, he's not giving up when questioned about whether god had denied his prayer on twitter he replied quote absolutely not i'm never denied go to data.jacksonms.gov to see the infrastructure i'm sorry wait i'm never denied sounds like he's gonna date rape god And even with all the questions that brings up about why Yarber never prays for like cancer to go away or for women to stop wanting to go to brunch on Sundays upon closer examination among the working contractors and plans on the website, God is not listed among them, leading me to assume he's union. God, that would explain so much.

That would explain so much. That would explain so much. Lunch break, baby aids. And finally tonight, in Kiss Me Pontificate news, thanks to Polish playwright Michael Kaczmarski, Mike Krzyzewski, thanks to Mike Krzyzewski, there's going to be a theatrical production coming out early next year in Krakow, Poland, about the life and times of Pope John Paul II.

And here's the best part. It's a musical. It's a musical. Love it. Or as summarized by Eli when he found this headline, quote, Jesus, are they giving us 30 second bits on purpose? I almost don't want to do it now. It's like slutty at this point. Some guy sitting in Poland, we could be on

the podcast. Now I'm guessing they'll be historically accurate in that at no point in the play will we ever see the Pope address the pandemic of child fucking that's happening at the rate of once every 11 minutes under his watch. And that brings up the question, like, because this is a Pope and it's about musical theater,

that's hard. How many closeted gays does each community have? You got the Vatican. You got musical theater. It's tough. It's tough. A lot of crossover. Well, considering all the success that Book of Mormons had, it seems like a Broadway musical

about Catholicism is long overdue. And just in general, there should be a spotlight on these people at all times. So we're going to help out with that. Yeah. Let's go ahead and put 30 seconds on the clock. Already there. Ideas for the lavish Pope-themed Broadway musical. Go.

I knew I used Sweeney Toddler too soon. Oklahomophobia, I've used that too. Fuck. How about Little Orphan Handy? Ooh. Um, Oklahoma phobia. I've used that too. Fuck. Uh, how about little orphan handy? Ooh. Uh, the Pope deuces. When two scheming Cardinals try to solve their monetary woes by putting up a rape enabling ex Nazi youth member.

Agents isn't the word I would have used, but yes, yes. Heil Jinx. All right. right, what about the best little whorehouse in Rome? Oh, there you go, there you go. Little whorehouse in Rome. Right, right, yeah. Diddler under the roof.

Yeah, well, there you go. Crabberay, the seven-year-old itch. Little combo. All right, so I'm not sure if the popes were already doing the kinky shit in the year 253 CE, but assuming they were, how about Meet Me in St. Lucius?

Stray Jizz, the story of John Paljon. What about Bring in the Boys, Bring in the Spunk? See, I was going to go with Lose the Jersey Boys. I got one for Pope Pius XII. The Secret Pardon. Race war to the top of the mountain. Old school Mandy Patinkin right there. Jersey Boys. I got one for Pope Pius XII. The Secret Pardon. Race war to the top of the mountain. Old school Mandy Patinkin right there.

There you go. All right. I got one more. How about how to succeed in business without really trying to stop employing rapists? I know it's not a competition, but you won. So I guess we can close the headlines out there. Heath, Eli, thanks as always. Can't take my game.

Fuck! No! No! Eli, help him out. Shoots a ladder, Scott. Oh, yeah. I already used that one. Damn it. Parcheesi!

And when we come back, Stephen Talleycastle, Monster on Sunday, will be here for the interview. The audio isn't super great, but it said it's worse at the beginning, and then it gets a lot better, and then there's a song, and the audio on the song is fucking awesome. Country. This hearing will now begin. Governor McCrory, what are you doing?

I'm afraid you can't see me. Governor, we can see you. No, because I have an invisibility shield. That's nothing. Governor McCrory, we're here to discuss your blatant violation of state legal statutes. Do you have some sort of defense for us? I do. Now, Governor McCrory, we're here to discuss your blatant violation of state legal statutes. Do you have some sort of defense for us? I do.

Okay, go ahead. The desk is safe. The desk is not safe. I'm touching it. The desk is safe. Governor, please. And we said the desk's not safe. You know what?

Let me give this a shot. Governor? Your Majesty. Okay, you know, fuck this. You know how the floor is lava i do okay well if you try to change the laws you'll fall in the lava and die and then you have to go to jail until someone touches you dude what are you doing just give it a second you think yeah okay gay people can get married but i have a laser. Let the record show the governor has a laser sword. I hate you. I really hate you.

Earlier this month, when I talked to Eli about us trying to move up north, he reminded us that we haven't actually told you what patron is for about two and a half years and suggested it might be worth taking a shot. So we did, and you guys came through with ludicrous speed. In fact, as of this recording, we're only about $45 away from hitting our $2,000 goal of YouTube content, which knowing you guys means that by the time you're listening to this, you'll probably already hit it, you know, as though your voluptuous genitalia made you incapable of anything except mind-blowing generosity. However, for those of you who don't just donate for the chance to watch

Eli try to eat four years worth of freeze-dried mashed potatoes, we wanted to let you know a little bit more about what's going on with our $2,000 and $2,500 goals. So for those of you who already subscribe to our channel on YouTube and SoundCloud, you'll notice that now that we've been able to take Eli on full-time, we've started the process of transferring all 168 of our episodes on Scathing Atheist onto our YouTube and SoundCloud channel for your listening pleasure. Not just that, but we've created playlists and categories for you to enjoy as well. So if you want to hear every diatribe while you're at work, we're on it. You want to play every This Week in Misogyny at your ex's house at 4 in the morning? Well, we can't legally advise that, but we can damn sure make it possible. So over the next few months, Eli will slowly but surely be putting up all the shows and categorizing them for your listening pleasure.

By the way, how's that working out for you, Eli? I can't see. Where are my fingers? Now you know how those Guatemalan kids felt. But that's not all. We're also commissioning some video skits, a brand new animated diatribe for you to share and enjoy, and much more. And we've only been able to do it because of the generosity of listeners like you. But don't answer yet or whatever, because there's more. It's looking more and more like by the time we wrap up, our Matriarch Pledge Drive will hit our goal of a national tour. And of course, for our $10 patrons and above, these shows and an exclusive meet and greet will be absolutely free. Also, since you have a marvelous vagina and or penis,

you've already been pre-approved to become a patron at patreon.com slash scathing atheist, or by following the link on the show notes to this episode. Thanks. And now back to the show. Thanks, and now, back to the show. Very stoked to welcome back Steve and TallyCast, the godless rockers that are Monster on Sunday. Tally, Steve, great to chat with you again. Great to be here. Yes. Of course, our listeners are going to remember you guys from episode 123, where we talked about the release of your album Baby Eater, which is, by the way, the only CD that I own.

But I asked you guys back on today because you were recently announced as yet another excuse to make it to Reason Rally next month. So tell me about the gig. Okay, so we're going to be playing the Crystal City After Party. We're going to be headlining there, and you can get your tickets. There's a Facebook link, or you can also go onto our website and look at our upcoming shows, and

you can find tickets there. We really want to see you you and after the show we'll be happy to meet anybody who came. We'll be taking really fun photos with our usual rock those thing we do with everybody, which is really fun, and signing merch

and stuff like that. So it's going to be a blast. Awesome. Now what website is that that we should go to? That is monsteronsunday.com. And if you look up our shows, you can see the Reason Rally there. And we give a link directly to buy tickets to the Crystal City After Party. We have a ton of events going on. It's an amazing, amazing thing they have put together.

And we're one of many, many events. And this is going to be definitely a highlight and an exciting thing to go to. Yeah, we're going to be playing our full album plus a bonus track for everybody that comes. So it's going to be really exciting. Yeah, right, right. So if Johnny Depp, Bill Nye, Margaret Cho, Amber Heard, Karis Anna Maria, Lawrence Krauss, Julia Sweeney, Ben Gillette, Shelley Segal, James Randi, Eugenie Scott, Baba Brinkman, Dave Silverman, and showing federal politicians that atheists exist wasn't enough to light a fire under your ass. There you go.

Monster on Sunday. Damn it. What more could you ask? That's right. Hopefully they'll all be at our show, too. Yes. Fingers crossed. Yeah, right, right.

There you go. So now, if you don't mind, it's been a while since we've chatted, and your album was just debuting then. So if you don't mind, tell me, how has that been received by the by the atheist community well i think we've got a lot of really positive response we still get a lot of um people that email us or uh respond on facebook that you know they really feel these songs speak to them and they feel like you know almost we're writing them just about their experiences when obviously it's you know mostly tali's experience since being the only atheist in a religious home.

Yeah, and that kind of feedback means so much because so often I feel like all I do is shout into an empty room because all I do is shout into an empty room. So when you actually hear from those people that you touch along the way, that means so much. That's great to hear. So what do you think? Are atheists good rock audiences, you think?

Definitely. The shows that we've done so far, the fans that have come have been really awesome and a lot of fun. And they actually, it's a bunch to our music. We make sure that they know that there's alcohol available at our shows. That makes a huge difference. That will speak to an atheist's heart right there. Absolutely. So let's talk reason rally.

Is there like one particular person that you're most looking forward to maybe hearing a talk from or getting a chance to meet? Well, you know, Johnny Depp, I don't know if we'll get a chance to meet him. Definitely Penn Jillette is high on my list as well. Either one of those, you know, if we can party with Johnny Depp, that'll be great. We may not be able to play quite as well the next day though. Right, right. For me, it next day, though. Right, right.

For me, it's Ray Comfort. Oh, yeah. We're going to dedicate a song to Ray Comfort during our set. We have a dedicated song just for that. Oh, awesome. I can't wait. That's great. Well, I will definitely be there.

I've got to tell you, I've been trying to sell our audience on going to Reason Rally all year. So if you don't mind, I'm going to kick back and let you two do my job for a change. Other than because Monster on Sunday fucking rocks, why should our audience go all the way to DC in June? Well, because if you care at all about the atheist movement, that's the thing to fucking do. I don't

know what else to tell you. Well, I'd say that there isn't another act like ours. I know they have a lot of rap acts going on, which is awesome. They have so many new additions to the brain stage, as I've been calling it, but the main age for the Reason Valley. They have added all these great rap bands

and groups and things, and that's fantastic. But to get a real... And I know last four years ago that they had Bad Religion. And this year, we're doing our thing. We're doing our thing at the Crystal City After Party. So we're just going to rock the freaking shit of the show, and it's going to be pretty badass.

So definitely come to that one. Awesome, awesome. Well, to be honest, that was a trick question because Monster on Sunday fucking rocks should be all the motivation they need. But just to reinforce that fact, we're going to fade to music here. You guys were kind

enough to offer us up a song. This is my favorite song from your album. It's a song called Pain. But before we cut to that, if you could tell us a little bit about this song. What inspired it for you? All right. So this song Pain is my personal experience of child indoctrination gone wrong. So basically what happened is, you know how everybody as a child, if you grow up in a religious family, you're asked to ask Jesus into your heart. That's like step one for becoming a Christian. And for me, it just, it wasn't taking and I was like, this isn't working. I wasn't noticing any kind of magical happening, like somebody swooping into my heart and some magical experience. So when I was questioning about that, like saying, I'm pretty sure Jesus isn't in my

heart. How do I know if he's there? Things like that. I was really like warned by my father, like, that's not good. If Jesus isn't in your heart, when you go to sleep at night and your mouth is open, demons can fly in through your mouth and possess you. And that terrified me. I got scared of the dark for like 10 years.

I laugh now. It's so ridiculous. But when you're a child of five or six years old, that's terrifying. I was literally terrified. And so this song is about that experience. Yeah, that is one of the most awful things about religion. I think that's the thing that keeps me doing what I do all the time, is to think about, you know, yeah, you and I can laugh at that very easily now,

but when you're five or six and it's coming from authority, you have no way of fending that off. That's reality for you. You trust your parents. Yeah, and the same thing is happening every day to five, six-year-old kids. Over and over again, parents are indoctrinating their children the same way today as they were when we were kids. It's heartbreaking. Yeah, and it's so easy for us to think about it as being in the past because it's in our past.

But yeah, for a lot of people, that's something they're living with every day. There's definitely a kid going to sleep tonight terrified that demons are going to fly into her mouth. And so really quickly before we get to the song, too, sleep tonight terrified that demons are going to fly into her mouth. All right. And so really quickly before we get to the song too, you guys had a special offer for our listeners that I thought was pretty awesome as well. Yes, please. We would love to offer all of your listeners 10% off. Just go to our website, modsonsunday.com and click on store and we can get you 10%

off if you just type in scathingatheist, two words, scathingatheist, into the promo code area. All right, that's awesome. I really appreciate that. 10% off any of our merch. Awesome.

You guys got some great artwork too. Oh, the Baby Eater artwork is phenomenal there. Thank you so much. Awesome. So again, the song is titled Pains from the album Baby Eater, which you can purchase

through the links on the show notes for this episode, which you'll find right next to links about more info on the recent rally and the Crystal City afterparty. Tally, Steve, thanks so much for coming on. I cannot wait to meet you guys in person in June. Yes. Very stoked. Thank you.

Father, I've been praying Each night I am asking Jesus, His loving part, entering to my heart. Father, you've been all known When he is there in my soul Jesus won't answer me Deadly, I'm down on my knees Hey, hey Whoa Hey, hey

Go away Hey, go away. Hey, go away. Father, you told me lies That hurt me all my life Jesus is not real but your demons

are hurting me still hey hey whoa See me still. Hey, hey. Whoa. Hey, hey. Go away. Hey, hey.

Whoa. Hey, hey, go away You said without him, evil will possess me You heard my cry but did not help me You put your beliefs above me I've hurt you and bothered me Like I can never forgive you I'm in love Hey, hey Whoa Hey, hey

Go away Hey, hey Whoa Hey, hey, whoa, hey, hey Go away, go away Go away Now that Eli's on the show full time. Not saying it's a good thing. Not saying it's a bad thing. I'm just saying it's a thing. Sorry. Sorry.

Our first several messages come from listeners who took issue with Noah's characterization of mythicism on last week's diatribe. There are probably too many to hit them all individually, but we've compiled some of the general themes here in the feedback. So rather than cite a particular email or anything, I'm just going to rattle off a few of the common objections and ask for your thoughts on those sounds right sounds good okay first and probably most common how dare you compare mythicism to climate change denial or creationism so how dare you um yeah okay so i wanted to defend myself on this one because i got a lot because look if i said mythicism is nothing at all like climate change denial or creationism i would have compared the two things right so the comparison i was making was a valid comparison i stand by it uh what i was not doing or at least not intending to do was equating them you know and i can kind of nitpick through the words that

i actually wrote and make a case that i never did equate them but way too many listeners thought i did for me to reasonably argue that it's their fault and not mine. So for the record, no, I do not think mythicism is equal in academic integrity to creationism and climate change denial. The point I was making is that a lot of mythicists accept arguments for their position that they would immediately reject if those same arguments were made by creationists at all. All right. We also got a lot of, you can't trust biblical scholars, therefore the consensus view among them is meaningless. Right. Okay. So now a valid argument can be made that there's a lot more bias in this field than in virtually any other. So this isn't

exactly like when the creationist says, oh, you can't trust those biologists. That being said, I can't justify brushing aside an entire field of study because the people in it have an incentive to be biased. That's true of an awful lot of fields of study that I don't summarily dismiss. Plus, as I understand it, it was biblical scholars that nailed the coffin shut on Moses' historicity as well as Abraham's and Daniel's. Plus, they're the ones that figured out which of the epistles are forgery. So it's not like you can argue that they wouldn't say something that was detrimental to their religion. Obviously, the historicity of Christ is a separate category. It's a much bigger deal, which is why I do think there's a valid argument to be made here. But I

don't know that it's a convincing argument. I mean, because at best, it's not evidence. It's just an explanation of a lack thereof or a lack of consensus. All right. A lot of people also suggested that you mischaracterized the consensus view among historians who aren't quite as universally wedded to the historicist side as biblical scholars. people made that claim in replies but nobody could provide any kind of source for it and as near as i can figure out they're they're incorrect but i can't find anything definitive either so if you can show me evidence to this effect i will reverse my position that's the crux of everything i was saying by the way eli did you have any like uh like deep thoughts on mythicism that you wanted to jump in here with i don't want to monopolize the feedback yeah if you say it a bunch it sounds like you're a snake you're like mysticism i add a lot to the show i don't know if the listeners know that now

all right well there were a ton more but i put them all together in one broad category called you don't know what the fuck you're talking about would you care to respond to you don't know what the fuck you're talking about as a to respond to you don't know what the fuck you're talking guilty i mean okay so like i reached out to a couple of prominent mythicists in hope of getting like one of them on the show in the next couple of weeks to discuss my reservations in a bit more detail so but no that's a fair uh that's a fair point i don't know what the fuck i'm talking about um so i'm trying to educate myself more on it and uh we'll try to get like somebody who really knows their shit on the show in the next couple of days to set me straight. Never stops me.

Double down. And finally tonight, we also got a tweet from the Satanic Temple of Boston thanking us for the support, but letting us know that the Satanic Temple of Boston is not part of the Church of Satan. So, first off, we'd like to apologize both to the folks at the TST and the Dark Lord and to point out that this is the most polite feedback we've gotten from a church. Yeah, it was amazing. Felt like Canadian people tweeting at us. Basically just, Hi, hi, hi, sorry to bother you,

but we're actually the People's Front of Satan, not the Satanic People's Front. Not a big deal. Just in case you want to update your contacts. Thanks. Thanks. Sorry to bother you. Sorry. Bye. Sorry. P.S. Bye. Sorry. Also, this brought up a ton of questions for me. Why is

the TST not part of the COS? Was there a parting of the ways? Do you guys fight? Are we talking Shia and Sunni or like different kinds of Jews? Would you consider a holy war? Oh, that would be deliciously awesome to view. And that's all the feedback you get. If you want more, keep sending us those emails, tweets, and Facebook messages.

You'll find all the contact info on the contact page at SkiddingAtheist.com. Before we get to leaving on a jet plane tonight, I want to remind everybody that Heath and I will be in New York City this weekend. We had to head up to do some business stuff this month in preparation for the move, so why the hell not do it the weekend in Nexus? If you're going to attend Nexus or you're just in New York, keep up with our Twitter and our Facebook page if you want to meet up. We'll be the ones stuffing pizza into our cheeks like we're about to go into hibernation. Anyway, that's all the blasphemy we've got for you tonight,

but we'll be back in 10,022 minutes with more. If you can't wait that long, be on the lookout for a brand new episode of our sister show's hot friend Godawful Movies. We're actually going to be recording this one together in the same room. That's going to be a first for us, and it'll also be a review of my new most favorite thing of all time. Obviously, it wouldn't quite be an episode if I didn't thank the incomparable Heath Enright for being impossible to compare to shit.

I need to thank the lovely and talented Lucinda Lusions for being way better to me than I deserve or could deserve. I need to thank the extraordinarily generous Eli Bosnick for both the invaluable contributions he makes to the show and the generous offer to share his place this weekend. I also want to thank Eli's pug Madge for her generous offer to share her couch this weekend. I want to thank Tally and Steve for bearing with me through one of history's shittiest Skype connections. I also want to remind you once again to check out their website through the show notes on this episode. And I also need to thank Nels Jensen of the Pi Studios for providing this week's Farnsworth quote again because apparently he sent it to me a long while back and I missed it. So if you want to help me seem like less of an aloof asshole,

be sure to check out his website via the link on the show notes for this episode as well. But most of all, of course, I need to thank this week's extraordinarily long list of extraordinary people. Jeff, Amanda, Ross, Craig, Luciano, Joshua, Matt, Robert, Giordano, Chris, David, Benjamin, Aaron, Robbie, Cecilia, Drew, Pasta Saucer, Carlos, Other, Joshua, Lee, Rice, Jay, Jack, Tom, Glenn, Sandra, Tori, Jaber, Richard, Christopher, Jackie, Tommy, Kiba, Wayne, Justin, Chive, Chocolate Bunting, Ethan, Eric, Brian, Anal, Johnson, Heather, Bruce, Nicholas, Steve, Other, Nicholas, Bonnie, Cecil, Laker, Duda, Cha-Cha, Sarah, Logan, Stacy, Stuart, Lloyd, Everett, Cody, Brian, T-Gen, Guy, Danny, Jake, The Reason Nugget, Facebook, Paige, Mike, Liam, I, Peter, Tyler, Other, Eric, Arwine, Mom, and Matt, whose generals and IQs and stuff are way too big to fit compliments for them into such a short segment of the show. Together, these 67 salaciously sexy... Wait, holy fuck, 67? Sixty... Oh, my God, what the hell did we ever do to deserve you guys?

Seriously. Oh, my God, you're so fucking awesome. Oh, also, if you you guys get a chance you can leave us a five-star review and follow us on facebook and twitter and shit but i feel really bad asking you for shit at this point if you have questions comments and death threats of course you'll find all the contact info on the contact page at scathingatheist.com the theme music used in this episode was written and performed by yours truly and of course pain was written and performed by monster on sunday and was used with permission fuck these motherfuckers up they're stupid motherfucking asses i'm so by Monster on Sunday and was used with permission.