The Sevan Podcast - #193 - Emily Abbott
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You're not on Trust Us.
Bam, we're live.
Hello.
Why would you do this at 7 a.m.?
What's wrong with you?
I love getting up early.
You do?
I do, yeah.
It's like my time.
Not all the time, you know, but it's nice.
Yeah. The show is is all i think about this
every show that i do at 7 a.m i'm like when i start talking to the guests that those are the
first words i've said for the day is why are you doing this no no like i haven't heard any like i
get up i don't talk i take a I make coffee. I walk around my house.
I open some blinds.
I pet the dog.
And then when the guest comes on, I'm always like, oh shit, I'm about to hear my voice
for the first time today.
And I haven't like, does my mouth even work?
Like, what if I just started the show and I opened my mouth and it didn't work?
I haven't even tested it.
I didn't run any tests.
You don't do some like morning Gregorian chanting.
I need to.
I thought like when I think about Savan,
like waking up in the morning and like what your routine is,
I see Gregorian chanting.
I'm going to add it in there.
Like,
Oh,
yes.
We are live.
People are signing in as we talk.
There's comments on the side. Occasionally I'll try to, uh, uh, split my attention between you and the comments. Um, but before we start, so you're doing something on November 5th. Will you tell me about that? And then, and then we'll kind of go backwards from there? Sure. November 5th, I'm running a course with my colleague,
Alexandra Durrigan, and it is called Rooted. And it's a seven day journey of yoni gazing and different yoni practices to come back to the pelvic bowl and reclaim that ground to discover
sovereignty, self-sufficiency, and deeper levels of pleasure and understanding
and integrity in the body. And it starts Friday, runs for a week of 30 minutes of devotion
to your body, to your pussy, and then ends with a closing ceremony. And it's going to be rad. And I think now more than ever, we need women, especially,
and men, but women is my realm, to come home to themselves, to come home to understanding the
messages of their own body. For myself, I lived out of integrity for a really long time.
And to come back into attuning to my own sensitivities
and realizing that these are incredible messages from my body has been a mind-blowing journey.
And that's what I'm sharing with women on Friday. So two things I want to, first of all,
is your name spelled right there, at Emily Abbott?
Yes.
It is? And is that your Instagram?
No. It's emily.ann.abbott. A-N-N, you know.
No, I don't know. Wait. Emily.
A-N-N.
Okay. Hold on.
And as in Nancy?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
And then what?
Dot Abbott.
So you just have to put a dot A-N-N dot in between Emily Abbott.
Two B's, two T's.
How's that?
That's it.
Perfect.
This show is high tech.
Guys, so she – this is how you make a podcast last an hour and a half.
You realize that you don't know shit, and you just start asking questions about the word she used.
And you pick out your favorite words and you pick out words that you pretend like you know the meaning of, but you really have no idea.
Like, do you really, does anyone really know what integrity means?
So when you hear someone use that word integrity, that's a, that's an hour and a half show right there.
Although she said that other fun word, pussy, and that's a fun word too. And it and it's like you know that like you can have some fun too so there you go you now know
integrity yes probably two of my favorite words yes um um but but what really catches my attention
is you say um more more than ever so before we go into like what all that means that you just said, why more than ever now?
We are being called as humans right now to really come into what is your truth?
What is your value? Because we are being assaulted with information right now.
We are being, you know, it's almost become too insane to even fathom what's going on. And if I go into like a
room, I could go talk to a person and they could be very pro medical system, pro, can we say vaccine
on here? Pro-V. And they could give me, and pro-mask, and they could give me and pro-mask and they could give me hundreds of people did
you hear that she can say the word pussy freely but you have to ask whether you can say the word
vaccine this this anyway very fair sorry to interrupt go on yeah i was actually gonna ask
say the word uh pussy fucking nuts not pussy is a great word and i learned so much i didn't even
know pussy pussy anonymous pusillanimous holy shit holy shit you guys are gonna love this
pussy lanamus i need to start using that word all the time okay so so so go back sorry truth
and value um we need to learn our own truth and value because there's so much information i cut
you off.
Right. And so I could go into a room and actually get into an entire argument about like the hundreds of articles and references that I'm witnessing and I'm observing where because I am not part of that camp.
I believe that every human has the right to make a choice about what is injected into their bodies.
And so what I'm seeing, though um, generally, and I'm observing,
um, you know, I'm in the acupuncture world, so I'm in the clinic a lot and we're seeing a lot
of people come in, um, who have had, uh, the V and, um, they're what I see generally. And of
course this is not, this is just my observation, is a disconnect. We are living
from here up and the journey of the feminine journey specifically is to go down and in
because basically I could have all the information in the world, but if I don't know where my heart
is, if I don't know what my body is calling for and what it knows is right, my intuition, then what am I doing?
What am I doing in this life?
It's just you'll basically be the slave of everybody around you telling you what to do because you don't know your center.
right now that especially women, because we have been so conditioned to overstep, overgive,
that we build resentment and stories of victimhood. And that's perpetuated in our bodies.
And we assault our bodies with not loving them, with, you know, wanting to hide them or wanting to change them. And it's just time. It's time that we come home to, for me, it was my yoni and discovering my deep truth so that I can go out in the world and be
like, I'm going to discern and make choices based on the feeling in my body. And then I can use the logic of my mind to take that
action. So we're basically bringing consciousness into our creative center, which helps you align
in integrity with your body. But if you don't know what the feelings of your body is in any
given moment, you cannot make really good choices, in my opinion, about the health of your body because you're
always giving it up to somebody else who is an expert. You're the expert of your body.
Craig White says she's Canadian. I don't mean this as a dig towards Canadians at all. There's
plenty of knuckleheads in the United States. But what's fascinating about that is because
Canadians are, they have an ideological, I don't know if pension's the right word, but they've been
programmed to be afraid of tall poppy syndrome. They're programmed to listen to the government.
They are different people than a vast majority of us in the United States. If you don't know
this about socialist countries, you should look it up. I'm not saying it as anything negative but this is extremely
difficult for people who are you there they are they're brainwashed in a different way than we're
brainwashed we're still brainwashed in the states but they are there's a heavy brainwash to really
believe the government we're all brainwashed that's how we operate i use that i don't use
that in a negative term we like no we all are yeah there's people that still believe that um
that red means stop like like like they don't realize they by brainwashing me you can't tell No, we all are. But Canada and these other socialist countries have some really fucked up shit that stop you from being conscious.
And Emily touched on some and I'm sure we're going to go into some deeper, deeper parts of it.
And honestly, I am so grateful right now that I am in the US because there is this spirit of freedom here.
disappointed uh for about with my country and how people are just blindly being like yeah um the vaccine passports are a great idea we should totally do medical segregation and we should
totally uh create a whole group of second-class citizens um and it's disturbing it's like really
really disturbing my brother who's out there in in Canada right now um he can't go into
restaurants he uh can't go to the gym um and he's already had COVID but that's neither here nor
there well it does kind of um you know ferry into this idea of this is the disconnection I'm talking
about and it's systemic and it's also by design.
If we don't understand our sexual selves, if we don't understand the instruments, that is this incredible body.
It's way ahead of science.
Right. Our bodies are way ahead of science.
We don't understand this body.
It's then it's much easier to be controlled by the mechanisms of shame, fear, and guilt.
And so going back to this November 5th thing, you said that people are listening from here up,
but they should be listening possibly from here down and going inward instead of outward.
Outward meaning reading the New York Times and letting it come in here.
And inward, I don't think a lot of people know what inward is.
Can you tell us what inward is?
So I'm going to speak from the female perspective because I'm not in the male
realm. There are lots of men doing this kind of work for men.
So I'm going to speak about this from the female perspective.
Okay. Just so you guys know,
I went through Emily's entire Instagram yesterday.
I'm very sensitive to black, white, man, woman.
I hate woman power shit.
I hate color power shit, and I get none of that from Emily's.
And by that, I mean if I start picking up that someone is saying one is better than the other, I get frustrated because I see the person's pathology in their work There's no like, it's, it's, this is,
this is the entry point for you. Okay. Sorry. So, so going down as opposed to, um, I don't like division talk when it talks about building consciousness, it sounds insane. Oh, calm down,
Sebi, calm down. It is insane. And actually this was a big part of my journey because I used to be,
I grew up in that paradigm of feminism that was like,
oh, it's the, it's the patriarchy and it's the toxic masculinity. And I let that go a long time
ago because I, I love men and I love divine men. I love men who are grounded and want to protect
the feminine. It's incredible. And again, this is the systemic approach
that has tried to divide us
and kind of take us out of our bodies
through hormonal birth control,
through not teaching proper sexual education at all.
And so I could go on a big tangent on that,
but the down and in
so I have an example here by the way
sorry I know I'm interrupting the shit out of you
a woman's highest
this is from Emily's Instagram
and I don't know if I agree with this exact wording
but this is the big picture
this is the balance that she's talking about
a woman's highest calling is to lead a man to his soul as to unite him with source her lowest calling is to seduce separating man from
soul and leave him aimlessly wandering so you see there's a there's a there's a leadership component
there and anyone who's met a obviously i'm biased because i've had that experience um with women um
with women so i don't mean to say that I couldn't find a man who would
do that to me, but I have experienced that with a woman. My woman keeps me grounded and has led me
to the path of, she didn't lead me to the path of enlightenment, but lead me to the path of
sustaining enlightenment. Without her, I would probably have floated back to the top
she keeps me like grounded and i would have floated back out into the ether and then she
writes a man's highest calling is to protect woman so she is free to walk the earth unharmed
his lowest calling is to ambush ambush and force his way into the life of woman
and and it's a cherokee proverb and there's so much room in there for us to express
ourselves and to take turns being leaders and to it's just it's awesome sorry it's to be radically
responsible right yes yes responsible for my emotions I'm responsible for clearing them out
of my body I'm responsible in understanding my feminine power and not overstepping it.
Because I could, you know, when you do get to this place of like, oh, I'm so in my feminine, you could see how you could get drunk with that power.
But the practice is coming into like, no, I have deep respect and reverence for myself and that of my partner or the man or person in my life um
wow you just said that that should be a whole show
that's a really sexy concept women who are drunk with their feminine power
it's like that's like um a spiritual born uh it's awesome i've known a bunch of those girls
god it's fucking great to watch sorry it's like it's like one of those videos it's awesome i've known a bunch of those girls god it's fucking great to watch sorry
it's like it's a it's like one of those videos it's like a real life uh instagram videos and i
am anyway sorry i've never heard it worded like that that's really awesome but you see a woman
like that you know a woman who is connected to her pussy you You see the way she walks, the way she talks,
the way she interacts, the way she can discern. And this is what I was talking about because I was living in a state of victimhood. I was living in a state of resentment. And then I went through
my spiritual two by four where I had no choice but to come back to my pussy. And it was in this alchemical container
that I went down and in into the feelings of the unbearable feeling of feeling and clearing,
uh, like this life's trauma. Um, every time I didn't speak up for my body and I just over
rode its signals. And that was like my whole CrossFit career. And then along
with any like sexual interaction or, you know, sponsorship interaction. And then it's about also
rehydrating and bringing a new blood flow to the tissue. So when you start working with this space,
you're working on all three levels,
spiritual, emotional, and the physical.
So in my course, this is the entryway
because most women are like,
oh shit, I don't even like,
the only time I ever relate to my pussy
is when a doctor is down there
or when my lover is down there. That's a huge problem. How about when you pee? Oh, well,
yeah, but that's like more of like a, okay, I'm just like peeing. Are you really thinking about
like your pussy at that point? Right. You're already thinking about, you need to get back
up and turn the stove off. You're not even done it's not there it's and this is the thing this is intentional this is um mindful work you're coming into ritual
and ceremony with this space instead of just being like oh yeah whatever brushing it off
and most women there's like a so much resistance even just being like oh i'm gonna like look
at my own pussy in the mirror there's so much
resistance to that and that just shows me where we're at um culturally at least it's easy to look
at right no no i'm sorry i mean physically physically yeah i mean like i like for me to
look at my butthole like i'd have to be up like for a long time and warm and two cups of coffee
and like 10 minutes on the assault bike.
My old ass body like.
But your pussy is just right there.
You just can sit in the mirror.
You can sit down.
Do you need a mirror?
I like to use a hand mirror.
Or just like a wall mirror standing on a wall.
Totally.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah. And the mirror is great because you're actually like seeing this full, your full structure right there and you're intimate with it. And you start to witness like what emotions come up with that. And for me, initially, it was like aversion. It was like repulsion, because that is how I related to this space. And when I speak to most women, their sexual story is, I can hear it. It's like, I don't, I hate my breasts. I hate this. I hate that. Like your life is literally a
storytelling like convention to your soul. And so every time you say that your body hears it.
And so it makes me wonder like why women have like the most highly diagnosed with autoimmune
disorders, which the body's literally destroying itself. It makes me wonder why we have just
terrible gynecological issues across the board, menstrual, you know, endometriosis, vaginismus.
Vaginismus? Vaginismus? Yes. I just wanted to say that word. dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, dyspnea, vaginal canal. It basically gets locked down with tension and it's like super painful to have sex.
I'll probably never get to use that word. It's too bad. It's not something more common.
No, it's good. It's not common, but it is. Unfortunately, these are the ailments of the
womb are plenty. And the problem is, is that we're going to gynecologists who have been,
who have been trained in a specific paradigm. And, and actually pre 19th century, there was
actually a lot more internal work from doctors, but that didn't make money. Surgeries do, pills
do. So that's where, if you look into the dark history of gynecology man it gets pretty gnarly fast it's
like terrible um especially it's the other way too by the way the work that men have done on
the penis is fucking horrible right some horrible shit sorry yeah and so it's like this what i'm
talking about when i say this is how your pathway to sovereignty, this is talking about you getting so in tune with your body that you begin to understand what she needs.
And then you, you can advocate for your body. So when you do go to, I'm not saying all doctors are bad. I'm saying when you do go to the doctor, you can be and have a, you know, a pelvic bowl
exam, a checkup, you can call the shots instead of having this sheet put over you,
your back in stirrups, you're completely disconnected. You know, like when I go,
I'm like, I want the speculum warm. I want to have a hand mirror and I want you to go slow and you're going to go on my terms because I never did that before.
I was just like, oh, this is how it works.
So when you start getting in tune with your body, you begin to question every narrative that's ever been handed to you.
And this is what we need right now.
This is the essential work.
Oh, nice tie up.
Nice tie in.
Someone said Jordan Peterson should be on this podcast. I don't know if Jordan Peterson has done any internal work. I think he's fucking amazing. And like, there's no better calculator. You want to put in three plus six divided by two plus five. mean the man is a logical fucking genius um and a wordsmith but um i kept cutting you off tell me how to go it's go go on emily but then i want you to i want to steer you back to going um because i've
steered you all over the place and thank you i let i appreciate you just expounding spreading
light on all the corners of of this talk i still want to go back
to what um because i don't i know that 99 of the people at least i feel this way i think this way
don't know what it means to go in like okay like like before you have tools to go in or before you
even know you can't even imagine this thing that she's about to tell you and it's so fucking easy
to do but it just it just takes us but you have to carve out like a few seconds of your life to do it
yeah it's honestly so here's what i here's how i started my hand okay this is how i started to just
touch the surface of getting in touch with my pussy that means bringing my consciousness like
i would like oh man my my trap is so tight in my neck. I would bring consciousness there, right, to deal with this.
Explain that to me.
That's the part.
I mean, how do you bring consciousness to your trap if it's tight?
Okay, so if your trap is tight, your body is giving you a signal to come to this area.
Like there's something there in the tissue being held.
This could be emotion.
It could be structural.
It could be some kind of nerve issue,
but ultimately I'm going to, and this is the work I've gotten into with people I've met on my
journey, I'm going to self-inquire into this area. Like, okay, there's something chronic here, it needs
my attention. Attention, intention. So I'm going to be with this space, I'm going to
breathe into this neck, I'm going to move it, because motion is lotion, in different ways and
see where I'm inhibited. And be tender and loving to it, right? You're giving it love, you're giving
it your part of yourself. So that's what I'm doing. I'm bringing my consciousness and my attention, my awareness and my breath, my sound, my movement into my pussy. And so it can begin. This is why I'm running a beginning course of the mirror.
looking at your pussy and letting those emotions clear out that we have related to this space and a lot of them are denser there are a lot you know denser frequency denser vibes if you will
of like i don't like this space it's ugly um my my pussy is not right there's something wrong with
it like the whole all the stories is it their pussy just everyone's pussy like that's
just a story like they feel that about way about other people's pussies too like they want nothing
to do with pussy no i think that i think there's just a curiosity of your own body but understanding
that we've also been conditioned by porn and same with our if you're in uh the heterosexual realm
your male counter parts
have been conditioned by porn so they've only seen one kind of pussy and so when they see
something different they're like what is that like you know and we all have stories of probably not
being comfortable in a sexual experience um because we don't understand our own sexual energy
and we don't honor and respect our own bodies. So when you start to teach women that,
oh my God, your pussy is beautiful, that immediately makes a shift. Like, oh my God,
I have this incredible anatomy. And you can go back into different sexual traditions like the
Kudoska and they actually typed female anatomy and you became like the deer woman, the cat woman,
you know, the Fox woman. But
so that's one of our layers to understand that based on the way the vagina looked, you got an
animal. Yeah, totally. Okay. Okay. And it like, and it tells you kind of what kind of lover you
are. And that's just like some fun things to go into, but just, this is your own beautiful space. You need to love it. The second thing that I do teach is pathways, deeper pathways of sexual arousal.
So we most of us have only been taught or not been taught at all.
It's just a driving our body to an orgasm through the clitoris.
And you're really only activating the pudendal nerve when you do that.
Do I have one of those? Do I have one of those?
Do I have one of those?
No, again, I'm not really sure about the word.
Pudendal nerve?
Pudendal.
Pudendal.
Pudendal.
And that's our most external nerve pathway.
And so you're having an external orgasm that's actually more based in a sympathetic response.
So your body's tensing up.
Your heart rate increases,
your breath becomes shallow. Yeah, I have one of those. I don't know if I have the pudendal nerve,
but I have that external orgasm thing. Yeah, that thing's cool. Right. It is cool. But guess what?
There's more. That's the tip of the iceberg, so to speak. So I teach how women by going in with their hands into their own pussy,
they can become activating, begin activating all the tissue. You're bringing back new blood and
lymph because we have to remember all of that is just, Oh, is that this thing?
What is that motion? Well, you said bring their fingers in. Is that this thing?
Like, do they actually bring their fingers in or is it kind of on top?
Like pushing on top?
You go into the vaginal canal.
Of course, there's also external abdominal work is something I'm learning right now.
You go internal with your own fingers and you begin massaging that tissue like you would clay.
Right. You're just bringing new tactile intention into that space.
And now you're waking up all those nerves.
You're waking up, you're bringing in new blood flow.
You're creating more breathability to that tissue
because it's just a huge erectile network of capillaries down there.
So what I tell women is like, we want a fat pussy. You want your pussy to have so much
elasticity that it can fill, engorge, to mess to its full capacity. And then you're going to
experience way more pleasure and that it will also be more pleasurable for your
partner you're also protecting your urethra right we want a nice fat plump juicy pussy
and have you ever seen a pregnant like a pregnant like like from one month one to like month nine
pussy no oh my god it's amazing oh my you're just describing it it's like a giant it's like a
waterlogged hamburger it's crazy it that is the second shirt yeah i like hamburgers though but
i just mean just like with the two buns and the piece of meat in the middle
that no one tells you this but like one of the greatest things about
the pregnancy for the dude is is like the
woman's vagina just becomes like it's like you said it's just it's like it's nuts it's completely
engorged in just nuts it's it's like it's like it's the vagina on steroids it's it's like it's
like just a it's like a i'm probably gonna get in trouble for this but it's probably like it's
like a it's like a sponge that's been like floating in water for too long.
It's just, it's crazy.
But Savannah, what if I was going to tell you, like.
It could always be like that.
Your vagina can always be a waterlogged sponge.
I mean, that's how I ended up with my next two kids.
Because you just, during during the you can just
basically everything changes when your wife's when the woman's pregnant and you just get crazy and
then you stop it just like drunk drunk with uh love and yeah and then we got and then we got
more kids yeah sorry twins you sorry twins you weren't wanted you're wanted now though but you weren't wanted
well yeah and that's what i'm saying like women can tap into that all the time to that own
juiciness and when i began to revitalize all the tissue down here and understand that i can have
vaginal orgasms i can have squirting orgasms i can have cervical orgasms all by myself. Then it was then that I cleared the way to invite someone into my life that would meet me there.
And now it's like, it's so different in terms of my like, and I know I'm attuned to my body.
So I know what I want.
I know how to play this instrument well.
And so though, so too does my partner.
And it's like, you can have this all the time. And this is what I'm saying. It's like,
we just have to tap into what our body is trying to tell us. And you have to give it care and
attention because by design, we have been disconnected from our own pussies because
female sensuality is insane. You know it, You felt it, right? Like with your woman,
like it's potent. And women, and now not only that, you can-
I've always been horribly susceptible to it.
Well, yes. And it's like, but now women can use that and you can cultivate it on your own
to direct and channel that energy in the direction of your dreams and your goals and what you want from life because you're truly getting to know the root, the voice of your feminine, which is housed in the pussy.
And so when you put into your pussy, she will put out for you twofold, tenfold.
And it's incredible.
And it's incredible.
If I would have heard Emily say this, I was going to say 20 years ago, but maybe it was just yesterday.
I would be like crazy, crazy intimidated.
Like I don't want a girl like who knows all this shit about sex and like is so in tune with their body.
It's just too much fucking pressure for me.
It's too much pressure for me.
The truth, guys, it's actually the exact fucking opposite when they're like so it correct me if i'm wrong emily when they're so in tune there's no pressure it's like a fucking tour guide it's like they like like all the
pressures off of you they're handling the shit they're handling their business they'll like
um you uh and i it's kind of like um a conductor to an orchestra like someone like me
who doesn't have a trained eye like i don't know what that guy's doing i'm like he's just faking
that shit moving that stick around but the that's how subtle it is and yet how powerful it is to be
a woman with a woman who's in touch with all of this stuff because um as long as you're open to
it there is no pressure there is it but it is
scary for guys to hear it i'm telling you is it i think so yeah it puts a ton of pressure on them
like to hear it the way you said it just there although although you said it more gently than
um if gently is not the best word you've said it more with more articulation than i've heard
and more like acceptance and more objectivity than most people um but i think it puts a ton of pressure on guys
to hear that about a woman who's like uh who's into her feminine sensual self like and it's
actually so so why do you think that is why do you think that is my first instinct is because
the dude just wants to go in there do his thing um hopefully i don't think it's like so selfish like he doesn't want
her to have fun but i think he wants to go in there do his thing she has fun um and and they
and they move go on with their day and so like you feel like that there's another piece to it
that's like homework that's going to be like work and and not realize that it's not like that
okay but here's my question then why was that the answer you wanted did i get that right
yeah okay because it's going to lead me into my next thing okay we are so willing to work out we
are so willing to work on our craft we are so willing to uh work on literally everything else
but we don't understand that the river of life begins
with sexuality we all come from an orgasm hopefully too um but considering the statistics
and i'd love to see a study on that if kids are cool or if their mom fucking had an orgasm
oh i would love to see a study about that if those kids are better kids but that's what
i'm talking about it's we are we come from this river of life and we don't understand that
everything we do every relating we do anything we go after begins with this sexual drive this
sexual energy and if there are blocks in that original sexual energy, which for most of us, it is because
men just want to go in there and do their business. Women just want to like kind of fake
their orgasm and perform. We're at the surface. And so that's going to affect every part of your
life. It did for me, it completely affected my life. It blew it up until I was like, oh God, I have to clear these
blocks so that the river can flow through me unimpeded. And so what I would say to any men
out there who are feeling intimidated, get to know the female anatomy, get to know your own sexual
anatomy, start reading up on Taoism, start reading up on how you can cultivate your own sexual chi and that you don't
need to just ejaculate. You can hold that in and it's a very sacred force. Sperm, ejaculate,
female ejaculate. These are all sacred nectars that you can use, that you can imbibe.
And it's life force generating. That's what we're talking about here. So if you want a life that
is more, you know, directed, if you want to be a man who's really, you know, stepping into the
world and, you know, fully embracing and fully in love with who he is, get to know your own cock,
get to know your pussy so that we can then start going into deeper levels
of connection because right now it's all surface and we need to go down and in. And so for men out
there who are intimidated, when you start to understand the subtle energies, that woman is
yin, that she, the yin energy works from the uh outside in you want to boil her waters whereas
the yang energy yours is very much like okay i've got this big hot erection um you know we have to
understand that that the polarity is so delicious and you can play with those energies and you can
go deeper and deeper into way more expansive levels of pleasure.
And why would we want to do that?
Because pleasure is when we're communing with the divine.
You know, oh God, oh God, before we orgasm.
This in ancient times, in esoteric times, this was a way to connect to spirit.
So that you could get the information about the next direction of your life.
When you start looking into like Egyptian sex magic and like the cult of ISIS, like you're
literally doing magic. You're creating magic. That is what you're doing when you are having
sexual relations. And when they are now connected to your body, when they are divine, when it's an
integrity, dude, you are reaching sacred alchemy.
And this is what the Taoists were talking about for thousands of years.
So it's a big fucking deal.
And this is something that more attention needs to be put on.
And that everyone has access to deeper levels of pleasure of being more raw and vulnerable
with themselves so that
they may be the most, the biggest thrill of them all is to be more raw and vulnerable and to be
seen by another. And we can only do that when we clear our sexual blocks. So this is the work I'm
talking about, Siobhan. It's like, it gives me chills to talk about it and it lights me up,
it gives me chills to talk about it and it lights me up obviously you can see um and this is why i want more women and more men to understand we need to make sex sacred again it's so sacred
and our young children are not taught about pleasure we are not taught about the subtle
energies we are not taught about our bodies we are, oh, here's like your ovaries and your uterus. Here's hormonal birth control, which like completely fucks up
your Jesus. It fucks up your scent. How is birth control? Okay. How is fucking,
how is oral birth control? Okay. Oh, how, how is it okay to give hormones to girls? I want to,
Damien, you said I disagree with seven. It doesn't put pressure on the guy.
I think it would be freeing.
I mean, you don't disagree with me.
You agree with me.
It would be freeing.
It is freeing.
You don't disagree with me.
You agree with me.
Anyway, I hate being misunderstood.
Oh, I was also going to say, though, by the way, like when you start going into the I've also studied a lot of the scientific parts of this.
And like when you start going into your vaginal canal, you're awakening the pelvic nerve.
Right. When you start going into your cervix, you're awakening the pelvic nerve, the hypogastric nerve and cranial or the vagus nerve, cranial nerve 10.
So you're now activating all of these beautiful nerve endings and nerve bundles and discovering where your pleasure lies.
And for me, this is unending.
I just discovered something over the weekend that just blew my mind.
Like it literally blew up my chakra, crown chakra, if you want to talk about that.
But it's like, this is an exploration.
To understand your own body is the journey of a lifetime.
And that's what we're here to do.
We're literally conduits of spirit, if you want to call it that, source energy.
And it's an honor to understand all the workings of your body and we can see through the the
fabric of our culture there's been this like separation through like the church
of you know spirit and the body or state and we are beginning to see that now on
like a macrocosmic level and we're beginning to see that now on like a macrocosmic level. And we're beginning to
see it with humans, right? They're so scared and they're so disconnected that they're running,
running to get, to like get protected by the government. And that to me is insane because
we don't know our bodies anymore. We don't know what's right for us and whatever your choice is right your choice is your choice um but you know we've gotten to this place of like fear-mongering
pointing fingers division because fear guilt and shame are such powerful mechanisms of control
and they're embedded in our body so clear those rumors um i don't know if what I'm saying is true,
but if you don't follow Emily, you should follow Emily. There could be. So what's interesting about
listening to her talk is there's a part that's super practical and still grounded. And then
we're getting to watch her go on this journey. You won't hear too many people say this, but God
bless social media for letting people share in real time as they go on the process.
The other thing, though, is that when people go on this journey, they can become so abstract and then you can't get on the bandwagon.
They'll leave us.
And I'm not saying you follow her blindly, but I'm saying there's some words that she's saying and she's doing the
workshop and there's going to be some very practical components to it. And there could
become a point where she gets so high and she loses tether to be able to bring on board.
And you know what, Siobhan, it's so funny you say that because it is a challenge. I,
before I was like,
oh, maybe I'm ahead of my time. No, I'm exactly on time. It is a challenge to convey
what I'm talking about to women and men. But it's like, because we're so deeply asleep
in the stupor of surface life, surface living,, just little clitoral two minute orgasms,
you know, so it's time to go deeper. And this is what, why the mirror of the macrocosm,
our outside world is showing us it's time to go deeper. It's time to go within.
And one way to do that, a really beautiful way to do that, especially for women, is to go in and start tending to the tissues of your inner sanctum, your pussy. And I'm telling you, it doesn't take that much. I know
it's going to be uncomfortable. I know there's going to be some apprehension, some nervousness.
I felt it too. But then to understand that I can get grounded in this area, I can get all my answers
from this area, whatever the next decision I need
to make, the next action, when to pull back, when to push forward. It comes with alignment.
And alignment is a feeling. It can't be this. When I'm up in my head, I know, okay, I have to come
down. When I'm feeling frustrated, angry, irritable at my partner, that's my cueing to go within. And I'm so thankful that
I have this tool because it's been an anchor in my life. It's been an anchor in these wild times
to be like, oh, I'm listening to all this information, but I'm like, no, what does this
body say? My body knows she's my empress. She knows the path.
My body knows she's my empress.
She knows the path.
I want to go, Damien, nothing but love, brother.
Don't worry.
I want to read something else to you.
It's funny that you mentioned Taoism.
I'm a huge, huge, huge, every day I look through Stephen Mitchell's translation of the Tao Te Ching.
It's a pocket translation.
Stephen Mitchell Tao Te Ching. I think of Ching. It's a pocket translation. Stephen Mitchell, Doubt of Ching.
I think it's the greatest book ever written.
Most people will open it, I think, and be like, what the fuck is this nonsense?
But there will be days where it will hit you.
Anyway, this is on Emily's Instagram also.
And the only thing that matters here to me is the very last sentence. The rest
of it is just putting it in context. So take, you can take or leave in my opinion, the first
five sentences, my boyfriend and I never fight because he teaches me how to not fight. And you
can, you can reverse that. I don't care. You can say my girlfriend and I never fight because he,
she teaches me how to not fight. It doesn't matter. Don't get caught up on that shit.
He teaches me to stay calm during disagreements.
She teaches me how to work through arguments without hurting words or yelling.
He teaches me how to communicate.
It's not – and here it is, guys.
It's not us versus each other.
It's us versus the problem.
It's like you're fighting with your mate.
It's not – like if you're trying to win in an
argument against your mate i know this is a little different but but it's so profound to me you might
not be in the right relationship or you might not be mature enough to have relationships you should
never be trying to win your mate you should be it's just beautiful it's it's it's not us versus each other it's us versus the
problem and that's why a lot of people that i mean that's the problem with just everything like
of talking in general people aren't seeking the truth they're trying to win the conversation
and like it's it's um those people your time is over man you're you're go away your time is over come back like. Come back when you're ready to look at the problem. Don't try to win. Don't try to hurt. Don't try to kill your opponent, and especially if it's your lover or your kids or your parents or your parents.
or your parents.
When I was in college,
Emily,
there were these people who,
they,
they,
so I rolled with the hippie crowd and there were,
there were,
and there were two kinds of hippies.
There were people who just accidentally became hippies like me,
like,
you know,
like you just lost your shoes somewhere or all of a sudden you needed clothes and you went to the free box.
And then there were people who were like cutting – they would drive their BMW to the fabric store, make their own cords, cut holes in them, make their sandals.
And the space you're in, I feel like in the journey you're on, that's the tough part about the journey you're on and the space that you're inhibiting right now is because there's a lot of those. I don't want to call them charlatans, but there's people who want what you're experiencing, and so they're forcing it.
And then you – and I think you've alluded to this already.
You are forced into this
situation this is like we're you were you were taken kicking and screaming and now you're like
all right now um like like you were holding on to a rock and one of the gnarliest rivers in the world
and you're like and the whole world was watching you hold on to the rock and you're like and
everyone's like holy shit she's strong and so and so you were getting accolades for like man that
girl can really hold on to a
rock and then but and so it was there was this why is the world rewarding me for holding on to
this rock when i really just have to let go and you've let go and now you're sharing the whole
journey with us and we're watching you go downstream and we watch you get all fucking
bounced off the bottom and now you're on the top and what the rest of us are holding onto a rock's
going oh shit she can fly It's okay to let go.
By the way, I stole that from Richard box illusions.
For those of you who haven't read that book,
one of the greatest books in the world. And, and I'm not joking.
I don't say that loosely in the first 13 pages,
there is a little story that's separate from the main story. And, uh,
everyone has to read that story. Richard Bach's illusions.
Oh, my God. Oh, man.
That's that's why I just finished The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand.
Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. How anachronistic for this time period that we're in.
But discussing charlatans, I think, Siobhan, it's interesting because, like, I think I was a bit of a charlatan for a while. I think, like you said, I was holding on.
I was trying to put the pieces of the puzzle back together instead of just, like, throwing out the whole fucking puzzle and letting myself become, right?
And become who I'm, my purpose on this earth, my dharma, as it were.
and become who I'm my purpose on this earth, my Dharma, as it were,
but also that it's, it's a path of self. It's a path of striving for greatness within myself because I look at every
narrative in society and the ones that have been given to me through,
you know, familial lineage.
And I get to pick and choose which ones I want to roll with.
And I get to create new ones. And that's me reaching for greatness in this lifetime.
And I think before I was a total charlatan, I was trying to force it. And now it's like,
because I understand the deep groundedness of my feminine nature that my, when my essence comes out, when my
truth comes out, that is pure. And then I can now have this healed masculine channel that's going to,
instead of burning up in flames, like perhaps I didn't crossfit, um, it's going to protect me and
guide me on this new journey that I'm on. So it's a deep trust in self while reaching for greatness.
I'm not going to sit here and say, oh, my, my whole purpose is to serve others.
It's not, I just, the more I wake myself up, the more that I go within,
this just expands outward naturally.
So I would say that, especially when you head into the spiritual
world, it's full of, uh, fuckery. It's more so than when, you know, the before times, uh, and
you know, I can, I even find myself sometimes reaching and grasping for that next thing.
And I'm like, oh yeah, this isn't't me that's just like getting caught up and i'm
gonna come back to my pussy and understand what i need to do for emily and yes that yes of me being
like yes this is for me yes it gives permission to everybody else to discover their yes and that's
what we need from women that's what we need from women. That's what we need from men.
We need you to all like stand up and step up. Two things. One, just not a humble brag,
but a braggart brag. I always saw it in you. I never saw the other side.
I always saw it in you. I thought you were, and I think a lot of people saw it in you.
You weren't fooling anyone but yourself.
But no one even knew you were fooling yourself, right?
I always saw you as Earth Mama, like out there.
Like how did this Earth Mama get out on the CrossFit?
What the fuck is she doing out here?
But I liked it.
I liked it.
I liked it because it broke all the paradigms.
But I always saw it.
I always saw –
Wow.
Thank you. the paradigms but i always saw it i always saw um wow thank you i always like you seem no different
to me now than the emily that i saw when you walked out onto the field i was like holy shit
there's one like i knew wow but i know all sorts of stuff i'm cool as shit um well and that's the
other thing it's like i i discovered through my pussy work I can be good at so many things. That doesn't mean I should go do them.
I'm going to go do what makes me like.
So that's the drunk on pussy part to pussy power to write.
Once you get tap into it, you can't get drunk and just start doing everything.
Exactly.
And actually on the get high on your own supply, I think is what they say.
It's so true.
Right.
And that's where that healthy masculine comes back in for that action the direction the protection um i know dudes who
have that same thing but like i don't know what you call it cock power but i know dudes who are
so confident in their masculinity and it's so crazy attractive and it's just nuts because they're
not even attractive dudes but they're so fucking like it you see it a lot like in the jiu-jitsu community because they're so fucking confident and mellow and swagger and nice and touchy-feely to everyone.
And it doesn't matter if they're – even the littlest men are still like big teddy bears.
It's just nuts.
You know what I mean?
You see those dudes. They're just like papas.
Yeah, and I think it's like because they've stepped into – they've done their work on probably their feminine, you know, all the wounding there.
And when you – yeah, a man can come to you with both those realms satisfied in his own being.
You know, there's a tough guy in there and yet there's no outwardly expression of it.
You're like, huh?
Totally. Right.
And I know it's in there.
That's the divine masculine.
It's one that doesn't need to conquer in order to feel good.
It's like he speaks softly, but carries a big stick if it's needed.
You know, that's yeah um yeah totally it's so attractive
i'm intimidated by all the pussy talk and i don't want to look at my pussy in a mirror
and i don't this is crazy and there's too much emphasis on sex and it goes against my
morals and it goes against my ethics and i'm where else can i start to go inward do i have to go
there what what can can you give me a baby step to start going inward?
Because this is just nonsense, all this pussy stuff.
I am a one-woman man, and I am not going to be a slut and blah, blah, blah.
And I will – is there – do you have a – can you trick those of us who want to be tricked?
You know how sometimes you need to be tricked, like to go on the rollercoaster ride,
you want to go on it so fucking bad,
but you need to be like tricked.
Can you help?
What,
how do we,
how do we manipulate some people to get on this journey who,
who want to be manipulated,
but they're just not going to go through the portal you want them to go
through.
By the way,
you're making a mistake too,
by the way.
I mean,
I don't have a,
I don't have a vagina,
so I don't know.
Um,
but you're,
you're making a mistake if you're not doing inner work every single day.
And the way I recommend every person to do it is to never, ever try to go to sleep again.
Every time you lay down in a bed, I never try to go to sleep.
If I'm lying down in a bed, I'm doing inner work.
And the only time I fall asleep is when I lose my ability to do that and I drift off but every time you lie down you should do inner work i think sleeping stupid like people
who tell me they have trouble sleeping like what do you mean what are you what are you doing trying
to sleep anyway anyway uh do you know what i mean by that you know what i'm saying yeah the old
reverse psychology it's great yeah so what where can go? How else can people go in?
Um, so straight to the pelvic magical pelvic bowl.
You know what I would say, try to feel,
you can do this right now or right after this little live, um,
close your eyes and try to feel your hand from the inside.
Try to feel what it feels like from the inside. Don't just like,
what does it feel like between the fingers, like the space between the fingers? You don't have to move it. Just sit there and focus on your hand. And now you can change that hand to, okay, I'm
now going to do my shoulder. What does it feel like from the inside of my shoulder? And then notice the vibrations, notice the sensations,
notice the very subtle shifts. And then I'm going to say, okay, come to the center of your chest,
your heart. Then I would say, feel that from the inside. Notice the tension you're holding in your
body. Notice the tension you're holding in your jaw. Feel that from the inside. What is
your tongue? What is your tongue like hanging out in your mouth? Then move down your throat,
center of chest, maybe go a little bit further, go to your belly button.
Okay, now let's go to the womb. And what I would say for people who are like, well I'm you know I was girl I've grown up in this religious household I've you know I have I am a monogamous person when when
I was getting into sacred sexuality the more I got into it the more I realized
oh my god this energy I carry it is so sacred and I am not willing to change the pH of my vagina for anybody.
It's got to be a next level man.
And I am like, I, I'm for me,
the path of sacred relationship and the path of monogamy is right for me.
I'm not, I don't care about what anybody else does. It's for me.
And this has made me,
this work has allowed me to self-reference
when shits come up because shits come up some of my toxic femininities come up and it's like oh
oh this is mine and i can clear it i don't have to live this story anymore that's what's so potent
about long-term monogamous relationships. And I'm not saying
whatever else you choose and whatever else you want to do, that's where you're at on your journey.
And it's necessary for that time. But for me, the more I got in touch with my body and learned how to make love to myself deeply, the more I could show up,
be vulnerable and really show up for my significant other.
And I called that in,
I called in exactly what I wanted.
So that's what I would say to anybody who's like,
Oh,
you know,
sex is associated with being all over the place and being a slut and blah, da, da, da, da. But it's like,
I have an inner slut and I like totally express it in a way that is way more, I don't know,
serving higher self, which is, you know, maybe I go put on some of my own, I do it for myself now,
you know, I put on some of my own like sexy clothes and
maybe I dance, I turn on some music, you know, like that's how I evoke different parts of myself.
And so it's getting to know all these little shadows and understanding how they need to be
expressed and maybe when they just need to be like, okay, thank you. Thanks for protecting me
for a long time, but I'm going to choose a new story now.
And then you become this really powerful being because you're not, how to say, at the mercy of trying to shove that in and keep it all closed up tight anymore.
And then it having to burst out at certain times or transversely completely shutting
down a part of your body.
certain times or transversely completely shutting down a part of your body learn it's fully it's full expression of yourself for yourself not for anybody else i want to go back to what you said
about monogamy um that i about the i guess it's one of the characteristics or implications
but it really caught my attention um monogamy as a characteristic of someone who is
trying to change their story. Can you explain that more to me?
Monogamy as a tool or a practice to, well, it sounds like it's indicative of being on the
spiritual path about self-growth. Why is that? I mean that's such good stuff as opposed to saying that monogamy is for Christian values or not hurting other people's feelings or all these other narratives we have around it. because like the reason why lying is bad sorry sorry one thing the reason why lying is bad is
not because it's lying who gives a fuck what it does to other people it's because you have to
live with the lie stealing it's not bad who cares what you do to other people that's like secondary
stealing is bad because then you have to live with the lie and when you live with the lie you can't
be high you can't you can't be free and that's why lying is so ridiculous but there's something
that you're touching on that with monogamy too and and i i've never heard it worded like worded like that phrase like that or
explained i guess for me it's in when you are fully committed when you're all in with another
human being they're just a mirror for your own shit. So when I am committed and fully
in this, all of myself in this relationship, and then he is also all of himself in that relationship,
it's like, we're bound to stir up the deepest wound in each other. And it serves as an alchemical container to transcend
that together. Or because I'm going to do my work. I'm like, like some stuff came up a couple of
weeks ago and I was like, oh my God, like I could hear the story that I've said maybe, you know,
hundreds of times before with maybe a different partner expect you'll know it's
a story especially when you're like i always it's like that's your story so it's like oh my god
oh i'm gonna like i have to change this narrative so i went and sat down
and i wrote out that story that i had always perpetuated in relationship. And then I was able to break that story down into a new self-reference,
a new narrative of, for example, this one was,
I always have to apologize in relationship.
And it's like, okay, well, that's a fucking story.
How about I'm going to be like, I can apologize in relationship.
I am able to apologize in relationship. I am able to apologize in
relationship. Like I am a self-referencing loving individual. So it's like breaking down those
narratives. And when that stuff starts to fall away, you're transformed, your love grows deeper.
And Simone, I'm sure you know this, you've been with your lady a long time you have incredible children and it's like it's almost those times it's like we think we're always
supposed to be in this time of inhalation inspiration but it's actually the exhalation
and the contraction that is so uncomfortable it's like oh god like fuck I'm so uncomfortable
but then it gives rise to the next inspiration inhalation.
And for me, that's why monogamy is so freaking powerful
because I could continually have to do my own work.
And that's a big responsibility and a big-
I don't like what this mirror is showing me.
I'm running to the next mirror.
Yeah, I wanna go have-
Like it's gonna be different.
Yeah, and that's also the thing like exactly it's not and it's like i just want that next dopamine hit well fuck like you know what your clitoris is just a dopamine hit why don't you
get deeper get deeper with yourself get into your vagina and start releasing that hypertonic tissue so you can start moving out those stories.
There's stagnation and congestion here.
As a dude, where's my hypertonic tissue?
Where do I go?
Where do I go as a dude?
So definitely do.
And then this is a whole other avenue.
Like there's scar tissue.
Like if you've been circumcised there's
scar tissue there i have not that's thank you thank you mom and dad thank you mom seriously
you guys want to watch a crazy movie watch american circumcision i know most of you are
not going to want to watch it i also recommend as a fucking hardcore fucking carnivore meat-eating
motherfucker i also recommend you go to the pita site and watch how
animals are treated and you sit down and you try to watch that whole thing it took me about uh
four or five attempts to get through the whole thing because i was bawling my eyes out but
there's things that we have to face how animals are treated fucking crazy and um especially if
you're a meat eater like me and you should in american circumcision if you're gonna have kids
you gotta see that movie okay sorry and i think so where do i go as a dude you you're focusing on your pelvic bowl
well i don't even know where the pelvic bowl is that's just like you stick your finger in the
vagina and you're in there hello uh no i would say like the pelvic yeah the pelvic bowl is
your uh you know your three bones your ilium your ischium, and your pubic bone.
Do I have those as a dude?
Do I have those?
You do.
I just don't have the uterus in there, but I got the rest.
Yeah.
And for most men who are squatting or crossfitting, you still have pelvic floor issues.
Like you have a big muscle um under the testicles and it's
called it's not the cremaster muscle but it's like the bulbous sponginosa and it's like that
that's filled with tension um the testicles need massage oh yeah sometimes when i sneeze that thing
will cramp yeah like you need to go in there and start getting or get your lady to do like i like to do
um cock warships uh for my man and like really get in there and like massage that whole area because
men are just as disconnected or they're connected in the way that's like um very programmed with
that whole space and totally programmed for a man to receive deep pleasure there and to relax and
to open up to that is actually a really beautiful thing. Now there's also, um, and this is something
that I'm just starting to learn, um, is anal rectal work and, um, our anuses hold an insane
amount of shame and tension. Mine, mine holds an insane amount of shame, no tension.
Well, you can change that i'm telling you
what am i i don't want to i don't want to but you can start even just in the shower um you know
getting to know your own butthole um and maybe like just discovering like why are we so disconnected
from that space just because you know we defecate there but there's actually like
a lot of beauty to that space and things that i've explored that i'm like oh my god like when
i just listen to my body my pussy and my butthole like holy moly like untapped resources of
information and um yeah i don't want to get too crazy on here but what one of the one
of the one of the greatest things i learned and i learned how to do um inner work oh god how old
was i it was in my early 20s i learned how to go inward i learned in in it was a it was a it was a
crazy first it was a crazy crazy first step um i read a book by pd auspensky
he's a russian mathematician he wrote a book called like the possible evolution of psychology
and basically i just decided that i was going to turn myself off i was i was done with life and i
was going to turn myself off and he basically and he gave this he gave this um uh paradigm of
thinking the way what we're made of and And he basically says, we're all just,
and this is, you'll like this. We're just all just a bunch of I statements. And if you don't
react to your I statements, you'll finally see who you really are. And so I thought, okay,
I'm just going to lie down perfectly still, not react to a single I statement. And, and then when
I get to what I really am, I'm going to turn myself off and kill myself and leave. Like,
just like, I wasn't going to do it. I was just going to go inward. And that was my first trip inward.
It was fucking absolutely nuts. But one of the things that I learned through that process was
I can just sit on a toilet and I can go inward and I can become my sphincter muscle. I can become
that whole track down there. And I can tell my poop, it's time for you to leave.
And I never have to push.
I never have to do like I can poop on it.
Like I can poop anytime.
I can have completely pooped and then go back and just do insane.
Just like really start focusing and going inward and get another poop out.
Like there's no.
I mean, I guess there would be an end to when it was empty, but like, uh, you don't, there's so
much, you control your body without contracting the muscles. You can make your body do anything
you want without, and it's just effortless. And I think, holy shit, I'm just thinking to myself,
like, I have to teach my kids that because pushing to poop is insane. Once you figured this out.
I mean, um, when, when I did, um, the birthing class with my wife um we were going to go the full
western medicine route we wanted to go to the hospital the home birth were for fucking idiots
it was dangerous blah blah blah blah blah and this lady said something that completely floored me
she said that a completely unconscious woman brain dead woman like who like had some let's say she
had trauma who's pregnant could still have a baby that the woman's body needs nothing and she talked about
the cascade of chemical reactions and all the stuff the vagina and that and that there's proof
of it that babies have been born from dead women basically brain dead women i'm like oh shit
and that's when that was a huge like that was that was a huge shift for me but inner work
is amazing don't people don't waste another day of your life and not start doing inner work it is
like everything changes sorry go ahead emily i was gonna say that i've just to um caddy off of that
like the infinite woman uh wisdom of our bodies is insane.
And actually one of the studies I show in my course is by,
uh,
Beverly Whipple and Barry Komasaruk.
And,
uh,
they did a,
uh,
orgasm study on,
um,
full spinal cord injury women.
And they discovered that,
um,
through cervical stimulation, they could have cervical
orgasms. And they like found that they even saw where it lit up in the brain. And which is insane,
right? So it's like, this is available to every woman. And then I was also studying, you know,
they started doing different with non, you know, spinal cord injury women,
healthy women, they did, you know, different stimulation points, so clitoris, vaginal,
cervical, nipples, breast, and they all had different spots in the paracentral lobule
of where it was lighting up. So it's like we have these pathways it's just merely a
matter of dusting off the tracks you know so it's available to every woman so every woman who's like
oh no i can't like this i i thought i'm just not one of those women who can have deeper orgasms
that was a story that was a freaking story and like we are all sensual creatures. We all have this immense, potent power, sexual power that can be channeled into anything that we desire. And so like you said, like, I think, and I don't know everything. I know like on my journey, like I can't make myself poop on command and there's still things i have to go i'll write i'll write you have a one sheet paper on how to do it you know how to do it come on it's it's just patience right it's the patience there's things
that you've been patient enough to go inward to do and there's things that i've been patient
but you my point is is you can go in anywhere this stuff that emily's talking about i mean
she's going straight to this to the fucking to the temple um to maybe where the crown jewel is
but but you can go in anywhere and start
doing work and i think she referenced that by like starting with your neck and that's a very
common thing she said also for people who want to start doing energy work lie down and put all
your attention on your hands and wait till you light your hand what i think of it is like a
marvel superhero eventually your hands will light up you, you'll be lying there and like, holy shit, I'm in my hands. Your whole inner voice will change too. When I'm finally fully inside, I always do this kind of test where I say, hi, Sevan, because I realized I'm no longer Sevan. So I say hi back to myself.
So how long do you, I'm curious about how long you spend a day doing like inner work or like what's your process?
you spend a day doing like inner work or like what's your process um my shortest time is when i wake up in the morning um because i'm usually like okay at 6 a.m i have an hour to get my shit
together so i can do a podcast with emily um but i do do it right when i wake up where are you who
are you how are you like just like and i start just get going to my body. And ideally, I catch myself even before my eyes open.
And then I'm like, I'm really in the body.
I'm really like the whole body will be like just on fire,
like almost like I can feel hairs growing on my body and cell division.
And it's cool. It's, it's, it's really bizarre
in the morning. And then midday, always in the midday, I lie down and I do energy body until I
fall asleep. And then every night when I go to bed, like my whole thing is, is like do everything,
everything I can to stay awake. But, but also like, I don't use, I don't use fans. I don't
like any noise. I want to go into all darkness and all quietness.
It's all about stillness.
And I just lie there, and I usually will start – my wife taught me this.
And this is all stuff my wife has taught me.
So what's crazy is once someone teaches you this, you'll realize how many teachers are out there.
There's this saying that my wife sent me this quote the other day, you can only see what your, what your brain is ready to see.
And so once you realize about inner work, you'll start seeing that a lot of people are telling you
about it, but you, but you didn't even know since you don't know what inner work, you can't know
what inner work is until you first do your first step of inner work. And then all of a sudden the
whole landscape changes for you. So my wife went to a Vipassana course. Are you familiar with those?
And that, that was kind of like, and as a mate, I don't want to fall behind her. Right. If she's,
if she's like, I don't need to, I don't need to be able to run a mile or bench press as much as
her, but if she's bench pressing and she's running miles and I need to bench press and run miles, I need to be like a good mate, bare minimum,
I need to be out there supporting her. And so when she starts these, when she went to Vipassana
and she came back with all this stuff, like I have to try it. I have in, in, in, like you said,
we're just mirrors of each other. So I'm trying to mirror and they teach you to focus.
Did she do a 10 day sit? Yeah, she did three of them wow yeah and um she's pretty she's pretty um
but she has a pretty hardcore practice like yeah and uh she focuses i don't want to talk about it
like outside of like i should have her on and talk about it but um she focused she's taught me to
focus on this space right here under my nose and And then from there, I just started. And that's actually a really hard spot for me to do energy body on.
But then from there, I just start doing it everywhere.
And I'm just like, I feel like I'm a cowboy with energy body.
It's just a giant party for me.
Oh, that's so cool.
Yeah.
But I've never heard of anyone.
Say that again.
I'm going to incorporate like just when I go to bed, like that's a perfect time to like check in with my pinky toe. Yes. From there. Yeah. I mean, if you can do, yeah, there's
no, there's no bounds go, go everywhere. And I just do that. I just never tried to sleep. So on
November 5th, um, is this, is this a, is this a, um, zoom call? Is this, do they come to you in person? How does this work?
Yeah. So, I mean, the next step is to do in-person stuff, but right now this is a Zoom call on
Friday at 6 30 PM and it's our opening ceremony. So part of the medicine is also seeing other
women go through this work, which is like understanding the container, understanding
that we're all going to be sharing that we are, we all have so many similar stories that come up, shame, guilt,
resentment, fear. And that's completely normal and it's okay. And then we have 30 minutes of
these recorded meditations, me and my colleague, Alexander Durgan. And we go through, you're going to devote
30 minutes a day with adjunct prompts about discovering what your, your unique femininity is.
And you can only do that by giving your root, your pussy a voice. She needs to speak. You need to
listen to her. And then that's where we start that journey in um and so it's seven days of uh that 30 minutes
of devotion to yourself always at 6 30 at night no uh this will be on your own like okay ceremony
and then you have um the the week to go into these practices that will be given to you every day. And then we finish with a closing ceremony the following Friday. And discuss what we again, sharing what we've learned,
the changes that have happened, the shifts that have happened, which are inevitable,
if you have never related to this space before, like it's going to open so many things up for you.
And it's and it's just the that first little way and for you. And it's, and it's just the, that first little way in the,
like the step into the doorway and then you're going to be like, Oh my God,
I own a pussy. Like,
like it's and so that's,
and that's really where we're coming from is that when I hear stories of,
when I heard stories of womanhood and what femininity femininity was growing
up, I hated it because
it was just like self-sacrifice, um, like painful births, uh, shitty periods have to hide it. Um,
you're either a prude or a slut. Like there was like no healthy expression of womanhood. So no
wonder I like drove myself into, um, you know, kind of a hyper masculinized space.
And I completely shut off that side of myself. And it was interesting, because during CrossFit,
all of my injuries were left sided. And it was like my body screaming at me like my feminine
channel, like, hey, you have to somehow incorporate me or nurture me. And so then when I started going
into that work, I was like, I can rewrite the story of womanhood. I'm going to have orgasmic
births. I have delicious menstruations. They're psychedelic experiences in itself. I can have
mind blowing, connecting, opening heart, opening sex. Like I can rewrite all of these narratives.
And it's just, it's a matter of intention. That's it. Right. And that's what I want to show women
is that whatever your unique set of qualities are within yourself, define your, your femininity.
And it's like, we need that to come forward because it's your own,
it's your yes. And that is ripple effects in your community with your children, with your partner.
Um, we need women to become turned on and switched on in their delicious bodies.
And this can happen. It's just a matter of spending time with your pelvic space.
What is feminine energy?
What is feminine energy?
Or how do you describe it?
Okay. So there's this beautiful, um, like Venn diagram and it's, um, there's discipline,
there's a surrender and then in between they overlap it's flow. And so most of us are in
the disciplined camp a lot, right? I got to grind hard like the David Goggins of the world, like go
hard and da-da-da-da-da, you know, which is a necessary part of the human spirit. But then
there's this other side, it's surrender. And I can remember being with women telling me, oh, it's all about surrender.
I'm like, what the fuck do you mean by that?
Like, I don't know what surrender means.
And that means feeling so safe and so calm in your own body that you're allowing her to feel exactly how she wants.
And that can only be done when she understands that you are an advocate for
her. Because over a lifetime, we've broken that trust. We've overstepped our energy. We've done
things we didn't want to do. And coming back to surrender is like, hey, body, I'm working with you so that you know you have the ability to
let go, to be in full feeling, to be heart-centered and pussy-centered and receive. It's coming into
a state of receivership. And most of us aren't, right? We're only operating at 50% of our capacity
with drive. But when we relax back,
when we,
when we listen to what our body is actually telling us, like,
Hey,
I need to rest.
Then she's like,
Oh,
my body's like this person is my consciousness is advocating for me.
So I can relax even more.
I can like open up.
I can just be dancey and flowy and whatever that feminine, like feminine energy is going to be different for everybody.
But the expression of it, but the essence of it is surrender, receivership, openness, softness, receptivity.
And that is requires discipline to go cultivate that so there are two sides of
the same coin and also not only that it's magnetic as fuck so if there's something you desire
you pull it in you don't have to go get it all the time let it come to you right is the earth feminine yes yes i mean and the sun is masculine um so yeah i guess
in all if you so i actually just all day fucking the earth and the earth and the earth just spends
like it's just bombing it with rays and the earth is just like just fucking just yeah and then from
that it's just like just producing babies just like's just this giant – I mean the earth is just this crazy – like when you get – it's just flowering fucking like –
Abundant.
It's just a woman just giving birth.
It's nuts.
And the sun is just this one giant – all it's doing all day is just bombing.
Yeah.
all day is just just bombing yeah bombing the earth with like element with uh the final element that the earth needs to to because if the sun wasn't there the earth would be just
completely even if the earth is doing 99 of the work the earth wouldn't be shit without the sun
exactly as soon as the sun gives it just that little bit of like that drop of whatever the
hell it's giving non-stop all day the earth just fucking erupts i mean the earth is crazy isn't it i've always thought of it as a giant woman just
birthing shit i love that it is mama gaia right like yeah and what i i actually wrote like this
whole i went deep into like this explaining quantum physics through sexuality and like
how what we're really discovering is that if you look at any
origin story even the big bang which is our like current cosmological story of beginning it is
like consciousness dropping into creation and then boom like all this like wild like particles just
like shifting in and out and like it's like it just proves that sexual energy is everywhere.
It's like bursting.
Like, like you said, these plants, like it's just this constant life death cycle, which
is why I think a lot of people too are connected, are disconnected from the food that we eat.
And like, I've, I've gotten into like slaughtering, like, uh, this organic farm, and like, just being connected to that life cycle
is the trippiest and most real thing that you can do, just like connecting to your body is like the
trippiest and most real thing you can really do in this lifetime. So yeah, that's all I gotta say.
And I would say, oh, the other thing I was going to say is that we like with the whole like religion thing.
There was this like separation of like spirit was kept with some other realm sky father sky, if you want to say that.
And then Earth was just for the profane. It was dirty. It's not right.
Yes, yes. We this is I think we're moving into an epoch now of you know matriarchs
don't work patriarchs don't necessarily work so now it's like let's integrate those both because
they're both freaking awesome so how do we do that we integrate both channels and activate both
channels within ourselves the dirty the profane in order to and the body in order to reach to sky spirit uh
sun source there's a quote somewhere on your instagram about heaven being on earth and i know
some people might think that's sacrilege and i know bob marley said it too but you are making a
huge mistake if you don't explore the fact that your heaven might be here on earth hold on um
and it's nearly just uh your own like you said i statements and changing that um the story and
because we know that you know they've shown that the universe is just this 2d
hologram projection from our own eyeballs so and this life and also with the light
um waves and also acting as particles depending on the server um like so quantum physics is
proving that we literally live in this magical place and that your words are your spells and
that your body is your instrument your words are definitely your spells and that your body is your instrument. Your words are definitely your spells people. Uh, that, that going back to this, man, we could do a whole show on this one.
You said, I am always the one apologizing. And you were using that as a story. I bet you every
fucking listener who heard you say that was like, Oh my God, I do that to my spouse. Or, or they
said the other way. Yeah. I am the one who's always apologizing.
I think that is such a great example.
What a great place to start. If you said that about your spouse or if you've been in a fight and like, why am I the one who's always having to say sorry?
Sorry.
That is a good place to dig in.
I think a lot of the reason why people do that, by the way, and is like hey be you also have to own some of
that this isn't the the the end i think that i think emily was talking about something deeper
than what i'm about to say but you also have to make sure that you make room for the other person
to say sorry that you may want to get over the fight or the problem faster than the other person
and you're not making space i'll give you an example there was this man that i used to work for and he would always travel with this
woman and every time he would try to he would get out of the car she would say like can you get my
luggage out of the back and he wanted to fucking get her luggage out of the back for every time
but he wanted to do it and she didn't let him do it because she would always say well you get the
luggage out of the back she didn't give him the opportunity to serve her so make sure you're giving people and emily is saying
something deeper about working yourself but make sure you give people the space to also work on
themselves and get deeper i just want to throw that out there or let people be good people. Yeah. One aspect of the fractured femininity is control, right?
Needing is control.
Wanting to make everything perfect.
Overgiving.
Like that is part of like that.
Oh, overgiving.
Fucking cannot stand that trait.
I bet you I have that trait.
Oh, I lost you. You broke up. Say that again, Emily. You're breaking up pretty bad.
Oh, I don't think I said anything. I was just like, I think we all have masculine and feminine
wounds. And it's just like witnessing when they come up. And that is the work, right? Giving
yourself space to witness them when they come up and to witness them in your partner when they come up and that is the the work right giving yourself space to witness them when they
come up and to witness them in your partner when they come up um and that takes that takes so much
time and it takes a lot of awareness um but how it's so worth it because you're like oh
i can see where this is coming from uh i'm gonna yeah let's like make space and consciously relate about it.
Is San Diego home for you?
It is for now, especially since Canada has gone totally dark.
So what if someone wants to work with you directly?
What if I'm not doing that Zoom shit?
What if I'm a baller and I only do face-to-face?
Can people reach out to you?
Absolutely.
You do work with people? You have individual clients you'll take people on? I do. And I actually am also trained in holistic pelvic
care. So I do internal work as well, which was developed by a pelvic floor physical therapist.
And then I'm getting my doctorate in acupuncture. So I will be getting that license within the next while.
But yeah, my whole scope is going to be working in women's health with women athletes.
Because I remember doing CrossFit, so many women were peeing their pants on lifting things or squatting.
And it's like, that's not necessary.
You can completely change the tissue of your pelvic bowl just like you would your
trap muscles or activating your lower trap muscles so if you would like to come work with me um i
have a website emily dash abbott.com or you can reach out to me uh through instagram at emily and abbott um should people be doing kegels no no okay okay let's talk about kegels
for just a quick second are like if you're just my wife's question my wife's like bring up kegels
i go why she's because there's just so much information out there pro con she's like just
ask her about it for me i was like all right. Dr. Kegel actually used to stick a, um, or place a machine
into the woman's, uh, vagina and she would squeeze around this little machine as for tactile feedback.
Okay. So that was the original Kegel. And that would, it was articulation and, um,
kegel and that would it was articulation and um strengthening um of those muscles so that they would all like work together but the problem is if you're just like sitting around doing kegels
um that's like doing a bicep curl without any weight and so how are you expecting like results
from that and then not only that most women um tissue, like I was speaking about is so hypertonic, which means that
it's like rigid. It's not moving. And we want a flower like pussy, like it can open and close.
So it can fully relax and fully contract. And that, that comes with tissue and manual body work to release that.
I teach it how women to do it themselves, but also to have a practitioner do that.
And then understanding that there's emotion lodged in those tissues as well.
But we need to rehydrate that tissue in order for it to be supple enough to then start.
I teach yoni weight weightlifting like actually using
is that where you sit on a dude's penis and then when you stand up you try to pick him up
oh my god i'm gonna try that now
he's gonna have to be an anorexic man i think you can start with an anorexic man who's like in the
90 pound 90 pound range that if you could do 90 pounds the top yoni um weightlifter in the world
can do 33 pounds she's cheating she's like flexing her thighs or something she's a russian lady like
and she is that how you do it do you sit on something and see if you can pick it up is that really no actually on my website okay first weight lifter i fucking
this is a yoni egg okay i'm so bad i sell these on my website but i give this under the caveat
like i don't like to promote them because again most women are hypertonic from sitting rolling
back on their sacrum when they're sitting.
You know, just please, people don't sit on your sacrum.
Nothing called the sacrum should be sat on.
I don't even know what I'm saying now.
I'm drunk on coffee.
Go ahead. Sorry.
And so you should not, you know, do not use a yoni egg until you have a proper connection with your yoni.
But then you can start using this to build strength.
Because if you would like to have deeper levels of orgasms, you need to have a strong pussy.
Like you can't just have, you know, it's like trying to do a muscle up before you can even do a push up or a ring dip.
So you need to build up to that.
And the Yoni,
uh,
so what you do is there's like a little drilled hole here.
You,
you put string through this like silk thread,
put this within the,
your Yoni,
you know,
and I have a whole ritual and ceremony with this because your body,
you can't just be like,
all right,
this is what I'm doing now.
And completely disconnected.
Intentional. right? So, and then you can start articulating the tissue with your yoni.
And it can be very specific. It can be left-sided, right-sided, can be all the way up into the cervix. It can be more near the opening. And so you're building that tactile strength with actual feedback.
And I actually then you can go into a standing practice with this and like hands free, move the yoni egg up and down your canal because you're building strength and you're building feedback.
It's just like learning how to do a handstand. Right. It's the same thing. Just your vagina.
And so my image of the vagina is just so different than that. So funny. It's it's all fucked up for me.
It's just like a cave. There's an opening. You know what I mean? And then you go in there and you're like, hello.
Oh, there's no baby in here. You know what I mean? Well, it's not like that. Right. I mean, it's, it's, it's like, well, it's more like a sea anemone. It's like, it's like, I don't know
if sea anemone is a good thing, but it's like, yeah, it can all be collapsed in on itself where
all the walls are touching itself or it can be like open. Totally. And that depends on, uh, you
know, even where you're at in your cycle, everything changes. Our biochemistry is constantly changing.
And I also tell women to get their own speculum and start looking at your own cervix.
Because, again, if you don't know those tissues and those structures and what they're supposed to look like and what they feel like,
how are you going to, like, just trust some doctor who was trained in a
specific paradigm to tell you like what's up? So you need to really start to know what's going on
here. It's amazing. And what I would like to say, it is kind of like going into a cave.
It's a portal. I call it, and many women call it, this isn't my term, but the universe you're entering into this wild place of emotion, of pleasure, of life giving.
Like it's so trippy, Siobhan, like it's so trippy and it's so potent and it's right between your legs and you get to access this yourself.
your legs and you get to access this yourself. Don't die and not access it. When I, when my wife got, when we finally decided we were going to do a home birth and we got midwives,
there was this one midwife who like, like was the main midwife, right? Like she's the one that
comes over like every two weeks or every week or every month. I forget how often, but then it was
so cool because, and I would always go to all my wife's doctor's appointments before that, like when she went to the gynecologist or the OBGYN or whatever those things are called.
And that's – and shit started getting weird there.
Like I said to her, I said, hey, will you be at the pregnancy?
And she said to me, I don't work 24 hours a day.
How would I know?
And she snapped at me.
I'm like, hey, chill, chill.
And then she told us it was going to be a partnership, the birth.
And I was like, okay, then can we do this?
And she goes, no, no, that's non, that's non, uh, uh, negotiable.
That has to happen. I'm like, this isn't a fucking partnership. But anyway, the midwife started
coming over to the house to do checkups with my wife. And she had one of those things. I don't
know what you called it, a speculum or something. And so every one of my wife's appointments for
like three years with her gynecologist was actually with her midwife we
never had to go to a fucking doctor again and i love doctors if you have a bullet wound or fucking
a broken leg but this late my wife would get naked on the bed i would be in there and the doctor would
and i'm not the midwife would come in and it was just like this cat it was so it was so great it
was just pussy the pussy hour you know what i mean or or the pussy half hour. And it's like, you know, it's just like, hey, is everything okay? Is the baby thing fine? And she had the speculum. And we're all there and the whole thing gets demystified. And then so afterwards, after my wife had these three kids over these three years, she still does that.
that her her her primary care doctor for a vagina for her vagina is not a doctor if she needs to talk to someone she goes to uh she goes to her midwife she wants to set some pussy questions
and i just i i can't tell you how liberating that is for my wife that it's not like a medical thing
it's great and any issues my wife has had i can't think of any off the top of my head. This lady either fixes or tells her how to fix or will tell her to go see a doctor.
Or I mean, she it's so much better if you're a woman and you can get into that space, especially with your dude.
It's so it's so much. It's so much better.
It's so much better. And yeah, even that's not a dig on doctors, by the way.
No, doctors have a time and
place and they're so essential um but i think we've become over overly reliant and just like
have given up our power over like discerning what's going on with our own bodies um and
if like yeah getting into like the birth world is like something i haven't even tapped into
because there's so much um but just maybe the surface and birth fit like is i have her on friday this is
this is like pussy week lindsey matthews yeah can you believe it i can't i i told my wife last
night i'm like this is crazy emily on uh tuesday or and then and then uh birth fit on friday lindsey
matthews oh you're gonna learn so. You're going to learn so much from her.
I have learned so much from her and her courses are amazing.
And like Emily sandwich, like what they're all doing, like Leah Bartow.
It's incredible.
They are really like her hair.
I know that's very superficial of me.
The gray, like the little piece of gray.
And like the.
Just, I was just just i've been digging
through instagram and every time i see her hair i stop yeah i just like long hair and just yeah
the gray and she's cool looking she's super cool looking and she's such a badass and uh yeah she is
a phenomenal woman and is changing the whole game of the birthing industry because that's
completely messed up. So.
Someone in the comments wrote Jason Hopper tomorrow. No,
Jason Hopper is in 22 minutes.
Can you imagine how flexible is my mind that I can go from Emily Abbott to
Jason Hopper?
Is he a CrossFit guy?
Yeah, he's a CrossFit guy. He's a, he's a, he's a new guy.
Emily, before I let you go,
have you read the book Stranger in a Strange Land?
Mm-hmm.
It's by Robert Heinlein, but one of the premises of the book is that this enlightened being is on earth, and he's so frustrated with humans because they're the only beings in the entire universe and all of the fucking cosmos where we have man and woman
and the ability to be enlightened and all the other places in the universe that have enlightenment
they've lost man and woman and the fact that we can both and i want to tell you guys this emily
this and maybe i'm just a prejudiced fucking douchebag, and I'm okay if I am.
But this is – Emily is such a wonderful person in this space because she is not building the woman at the expense of criticizing the man.
She is speaking about the woman as the woman and the man's role as a leader, supporter, follower, all the aspects of how the two work together there's
no there's no there's no she's not she's not um um there's no chip on her shoulder she's not
holding her foot on the neck of male energy in order to prop up feminine energy there's none of
there's none of that from her there's none of that hippy dippy voice shit from her that she did this is just this is this is the one i i i get behind i get
behind this this um anyway that book's amazing stranger in a strange land i highly recommend it
cool um there's a quote um the more energy i pour into myself the greater my capacity to serve i
want to finish on that before i run to the bathroom. What does that mean? Because so many people, that's, that's, how can that be? How can I, let me read it one more time. The more energy I pour into myself, the greater my capacity to serve. That's something you wrote on your Instagram.
Yeah, I was in the woods in Colorado and I had just done some psychedelics and like was just naked in the woods and just completely connected. But I think, again, not only women, but society has been taught like the only purpose in this world is to like serve and most like spiritual realms are like it's all about service.
like it's all about service but that complete I feel like destroys what you are here to do which is to be completely reaching for greatness within yourself and when you reach for greatness within
yourself when you find your yes when you find your truth and you pour into that your cup filleth over and then you can spread that, you know, that joy and that,
um, your testimony of pouring into yourself, that it is the truth, that it works, that it's,
um, it's available and it's real. And you don't have to continually self-sacrifice to think and
grind yourself away to think that that's the way to get your,
your desires or your needs met. So, uh, especially in the, for women, we have been taught to overstep
our energy. We have been taught to deny the intuition. Um, and that goes back historically
for a purpose because when we start to tap into, Oh no, this is what I need and I'm going to make
sure my needs are met. When you become self-sufficient in that way, your power is endless.
Like I was talking about, like the magnetism, the surrender, the receivership, pair that with a
really strong discipline, you're in flow. And not flow just like when you're on an athletic floor or not flow when um you know you're surfing
but flow in all aspects of your life and that comes from serving self there's nothing wrong
with serving self and we've been taught otherwise by design and for uh so come back to yourself.
What a great, what a great mirror you've been to all, to all humanity.
When you were on the CrossFit floor, you were showing people that what the human body can do and how strong people can be. And, and I think you're an inspiration to a ton of people and you, the movement and stuff you do still on your,
on your Instagram as an inspiration.
And now to just sort of really go to the next level of consciousness to take
that from physical to emotional and spiritual while still being connected to
the physical.
Thank you for your contribution.
Awesome.
Thank you for having me on and recognizing that.
I feel very recognized and I appreciate that.
It means a lot.
And we're off.