The Sevan Podcast - #228 - Live Call In Show
Episode Date: December 13, 2021Live Call in Show together with producer Matt Souza. The Sevan Podcast is sponsored by http://www.barbelljobs.com Follow us on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/therealsevanpodcast/ Episode Videos ...https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC59b5GwfJN9HY7uhhCW-ACw/videos Sevan's Stuff: https://www.instagram.com/sevanmatossian/?hl=en https://app.sugarwod.com/marketplace/3-playing-brothers Support the show Partners: https://cahormones.com/ - CODE "SEVAN" FOR FREE CONSULTATION https://www.paperstcoffee.com/ - THE COFFEE I DRINK! https://asrx.com/collections/the-real... - OUR TSHIRTS ... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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powerful backing of american express visit amex.ca slash y amex benefits vary by card other conditions bam we're live got the fucking omnicron my throat couldn't be any more sore
wait you really have the omnicron no no one has the omnicron i don't how how do they even check
if you have the omnicron how did they check if you have the delta yeah have you looked into that
it's the it's fucking hilarious oh yeah if you start digging around and seeing how they check if you have the Delta? Yeah. Have you looked into that? It's fucking hilarious.
Oh, yeah. If you start digging around and seeing how they check, it's hilarious.
It's another one of the absurdities and prepositions.
My throat really is sore, and I'm pretty sure the only sickness going around is the Omicron.
And I don't take any precautions.
I'm a complete and total jackass.
I was at a skate park just running my hands down 50 feet of rail and then wiping my face
not on purpose you know what i mean like just like like all the rails and shit they have in
there not like the rails like that the guy skates on but just the rails for the fat old parents
to hold on to as they watch their kids in the trampoline park in scottsdale
and so so basically when they check when they check
these variants they basically like how do you guys even know we're live look at these guys
logan bruntmeyer who is that i don't know who that is cory hall seen that dude before logan
mark well you guys i'm here too what's this what's up suza i am here too hello hello steve on and his sidekick it's like
who says hi to robin the batmobile drives by and you guys are like what's up robin
wait can we can we show this real quick because i i saw it earlier oh shit and it was awesome
oh shit i forgot my fucking notes hold on one second yeah you show it
all right cool so this is actually from seeing us how set on his uh shadow band we might as well
as bring up his uh instagram on here to display it but for those of you who have skated before know that this is no easy feat.
And especially for his age and size, it's just a phenomenon.
Look at that.
Boom.
Solid.
So anyhow, I was going to talk about it with Sevalon to get it going,
but I will have to wait to see.
I'm back.
All right, good, because I was bombing. Did you bombing time me how long did that take i was bombing uh like six six times of hobby jumping over that skateboard
oh yeah that's really cool right yeah that's well you know you don't really appreciate it unless
you've actually tried to skateboard before because he actually makes it look pretty good too but like
if you if you've ever been on a skateboard in order to drop in like that and uh and hit the lip just right to pop the board up over that other one
that's impressive yeah it's nuts hey look at hey someone how cool the dude is
god damn my throat is so sore man yeah you
oh hey someone how cool the dude is travis baj? I've done some traveling with him and he is a great guy. Uh, so there was this, uh, I don't know. I don't know what you call it. Diatribe monologue, words of wisdom. I used to do them on my Instagram every once in a while. Um was this one time I gave this lecture. If you're not the coolest dude in the room, then shut the fuck up. You got to know when you're not the coolest dude in the room and let the coolest dude in the room talk.
or him and Dave Castro as the coolest dudes in the room.
Like when those do, when Travis is in the room,
he's the coolest dude in the room. And if you,
the problem is is that if you try to steal the limelight from him,
he'll let you and you'll look like an idiot, you know, and you guys have all seen that the way this works is so me,
Sousa Hobart and Kate are all in the room.
And let's say Sousa is the coolest dude in the room and and he's the funniest guy, and he's running the show, right?
Then another dude walks in who's not as cool as Sousa, but he tries to take the limelight.
But he's now the richest dude in the room, right?
That guy's the richest dude in the room, maybe even our boss.
He now looks like a complete jackass by demanding all the attention because suze is really the
funniest coolest dude in the room and even if that guy wasn't our um wasn't wasn't our boss
the coolest dude in the room has a tendency to let whoever wants steal the limelight from them
if they want it so like travis is like that and dave is like that they're when they're in the room
they're the coolest dudes in the room but if you try like to hijack the conversation like take the
limelight from them they'll let you but everyone will be annoyed with you because no one wants to
hear you fucking talk even if you're a fucking nine no one wants to hear you talk because travis
is there and he's a 10 or dave is there and he's a 10 so um it's it's um and then of course there's you know there's exceptions to the room
the rule if it's 10 o'clock at night and there's one hot chick she doesn't even have to be hot
and five drunk dudes then it changes the whole dynamic because the chick might not be the coolest
person in the room but everyone's letting her talk and trying to outlast the next guy to see
who's going to pass out first so that they can be the only one left with the girl to it become some weird dynamic but those are exceptions to the rule you know what i mean it's like it's
like but for the most part what i'm saying is true if there's no like sex involved is there
any like metrics to the coolest guy in the room like is it just an energy you feel because i not
like i disagree but i'm just like you know i don't know no i know what you're saying like what makes
a guy cool is it because you can see that line of his penis through his jeans or is it because he tells funny jokes i
have no idea what it is i have no is it because he's tall is because he's short
no i don't think there is if there is one i don't know what it is
i don't know but i'm open to anyone who does know i mean i'm not saying that there isn't one
i just if i'm but i'm open to anyone who does know i mean i'm not saying that there isn't one
so how was your travels they were great there's like metrics there there's like how about this one i was trying to fit along that same line
of what you're saying today i was thinking about this today open-mindedness so there's like there's
just complete assholes out there who just think
that everyone should get vaccinated. And then there's really cool, open-minded people like me
who, um, don't care whether you get the vaccine or not. And then there's someone even more
open-minded than me who doesn't care if you're one of those assholes
who thinks that little kids should get the vaccine.
And I'm like, is that really more open-minded?
Is that like, are you just getting like to like,
to like, like that Bob Marley song that he's singing,
like everything's going to be all right.
And he talks about how even nuclear reactors are perfect
and everything's perfect.
And the world's just going the way it should.
And like, it's okay.
The kids are being molested and nuclear
reactors are leaking it's okay man it's a uh episode 226 savon sings reggae skip this episode
can't believe i'm not i haven't even drank coffee yet what is going on with me today
i was in such a bad mood i didn't think the show was going to go off that was pretty good reggae right that was good yeah thank you that was good i did not watch the
2018 games documentary i didn't watch the one the 2000 the one that came before it 2017 no no which
one came before 2021 whatever that didn't one just get released i didn't i didn't see that one either yeah i figured which
one it was hey when you're editing movies like that like the ones you made in the past and
you've just seen it so many times have you been cutting it up is there just come to a point when
it's done you're just like i don't even want to watch it again or is it uh there'd be well
there becomes a point where you can't see it.
I can't really explain what that means, but you're like – so when you watch a movie, when you edit a movie, if you shoot the movie at 30 frames a second, you have to remember that the editors are editing it at 30 frames a second.
What do I mean by that?
So you're watching the movie, and as the viewer, you're just watching seconds or chunks of seconds go by.
When you're the editor, you have to watch the movie at 1 30th of a second like to be a good editor it's fucking nuts
and what i mean by that is is like you're making clips that are up to 1 30th of a second long so
you'll be scrolling along you'll be like i gotta cut that right before suza blinks wow because you're watching
you've watched the movie so many times you're watching every nuance every creep every you're
just like like okay i gotta cut that off here and you're like ah i have to bring the sound in of the
next clip about 10 30ths of a second before this one goes out so that there's a nice crossfit and
it's just it's nuts and so after while, you watch it so many times,
you're watching it, you don't even know what you're watching.
Something happens.
I don't know what the phenomenon is, but it's crazy.
Like snow blindness.
Yes, it is crazy.
There's something weird.
Sorry about all the sniffles, guys.
They don't test for variants.
That's the thing.
So they don't,
like one out of every 7,000 positive tests
gets tested for a variant
and then they run some statistical model on it.
That's a failed model.
I mean, so there is no there.
They don't test.
They don't have the capability of testing every time you can't go in and be like and they tell you of covid and then they can be like, hey, which variant do I have?
They won't tell you.
They'll be like they just know that.
OK, now 80 percent of the people in your area are getting the Omicron one.
So they just dumped you in the Omicron bucket.
Yeah.
I mean, it's just, it's idiocy.
It was the lack of that discussion too.
There's, everybody just took it right at face value.
Like, oh, there's a new variant and it's spreading really quickly.
And here's our numbers.
They're up by our trusted institutions.
And then nobody was like, wait, how could you differentiate?
Do you like, do you do the wave thing?
And then look and you're like, oh, yep, you got
Delta.
We have a Delta here.
You know, like nobody questioned it.
You should do that gesture a lot.
It made your bicep look big like this one.
I think it's the lighting just because this light is so bright.
I think your bicep looks big because just because your tricep so small.
Fair enough. No tricep so small fair enough no tricep back seven love your
podcast but tell us the truth what's going on with you and matt i think you mean and tell us
what what's this but tell us seven love your contest but like but what does but mean there
love your podcast but tell us the truth of what's going on and you
if i could tell you i don't know what's going on with me and matt i i explained it really well
in that podcast i did with josh he basically called me and told me why he doesn't want to
do the podcast anymore it's it's not relevant to me sharing that with anyone it's it's like not
and it wouldn't even matter to you guys it's just as like in the big picture it's just that he's too busy he that he's it's um it's it would fit under the
category of being too busy i think that's not fair to say yeah but i'm just saying the egomaniac
self-centered uber insecure savon matosian thinks it's all about him, that I did something. I have this perception of myself that thinks that there's a threshold to some people's tolerance.
There was this phenomenon that went on on the podcast with the Josh, Matt, and Sevan podcast where I would be cracking jokes and Matt would take them seriously and explain them.
And I would never be like, dude, that was a joke. And that would happen probably two or three times every show.
And it's a little bit of a weird phenomenon.
And I think that maybe it's something around that.
So like if I were to be like, would you rob a bank, Matt?
You know, talking about his hat.
That's not really a good example.
But let's say that was a bank robber's hat.
And I would be like, actually, this isn't the type of hat that people rob banks with and i and i picked this up uh it's a tom's hat and
every hat i buy one goes to charity and this actually isn't a bank robbing hat and um and
you know bank robbing is a serious crime and then i would be like holy fuck i thought that's not that
didn't go how i wanted it to so i know i know that me and him weren't on the same page that's not a bad thing that's not i mean he was remember when we did the the very first episode i was trying to figure out
who's the smartest and i was the dumbest and matt was the smartest and josh was in the middle so
he's he's just smart and i'm just fucking not so how about that that's all i got nancy yeah people
i think you use the word but wrong but but we'd have to ask matt because he's the smartest guy ah these documentaries need to
have some new drama to make change i know i i don't think so i like the same format over and
over and over the bad guys oh you know over ravine michael knight has to push turbo boost kit jumps over the ravine
and we save the day i'm fucking every show can be like that for me but i get what you're saying
i get we're saying hey you know it would be the best documentary ever i'm and i'm
serious matt should enter the women's competition
or or just some someone someone just do it just one of you dudes out there just do it
like you i don't even think you need to be well you have to be pretty you're gonna have to be
pretty good to be yeah you're gonna have to be pretty good i was gonna say you don't even have
to be that good you can't be some regional wash up and go hey hey colton mertens colton mertens
take one for the fucking team and just do it.
Just go over there.
All you have to do, just test the water, see what happens.
I'm totally –
You think CrossFit would allow it?
They're so woke.
They don't care about – so they have no integrity.
They have no – they're they're like
just mcdonald's or coke or whatever just whoever whatever sodas whatever the crowd wanted they
would do you know what i mean like they just want to know the pulse i mean if for some reason they
could find a movement that was racist like if someone could be like the thruster is actually
quite quite racist well it would have to be against black people not against white people but if
they could be like the thruster is really um black people uh do not do the thruster as well
as white people they'd have to pull that out of the games i mean that's how that that those
fuckers are so wishy-washy no vision completely lost their way the only people holding down the
the affiliate owners who heard greg glassman's message so and what and what is and what is the vision of crossfit hq can't tell you
probably but i but i can tell you i mean some of the leftovers can i mean
well i think what had the the that never came up when you were there or anything like that
was that anything that was ever talked about you mean with greg yeah greg just pounded the vision into us non-stop you wanted to fucking
blow your brains out the fucking guy was a recording i mean there was nuance to it it was
always changing like a little bit like ah should you like the the diet maybe it's maybe it's uh
no maybe it's no fruit ah Ah, maybe fruit should be before
starch. Ah, maybe we should have done strict pulls before keeping pull-ups. But the vision was this,
that, um, constantly varied functional movement executed at high intensity and the foundation,
and the pyramid always stayed the same. And we knew what the pyramid was and it was nutrition
and that was pounded into us. And that absolutely, um, only do things, only believe in the highest rigors of
provable science, which was something that was that had the highest predictive value of working
and don't believe in consensus science. And, you know, just all the all it was just pounded into
us that you needed to work out three days on one day off, that this was the diet you needed to have,
that sugar was added sugar and refined carbohydrates were what led to like all diseases i mean he was
10 years ago 15 years ago when i met greg he was calling um uh dementia type 3 diabetes i'd never
even heard that now people like are like did you know that dementia might be type 3 diabetes
i mean he told us the tsunami of chronic disease
was coming. He explained to us that you can't save everyone, that the affiliates are just lifeboats
and just there's no point in trying to save everyone. Now they have a metric. I think it used
to Greg would have never let happiness be a metric, just like he never let those of us HQ do
marketing or try to make money. That's what was so funny.
Whenever anyone would say, Oh, excuse just doing that with the open and charging this and that
just to make money. Dude, if you spoke like that around Greg, you were toast. He not, he wouldn't
fire you, but he would use you as an example and fuck you up in front of the whole group.
We always chased excellence. What was the best way to support an affiliate? What was the best way
to get healthy? What were the best foods to eat? What were the best combination to support an affiliate what was the best way to get healthy what were
the best foods to eat what were the best combination of movements to do and then the
rest would fall into place people would buy the programming people would buy the watch the videos
people would buy go into affiliates and spend money and and and and then and then and then
people would either make money or they'd be happy or they wouldn't. But he didn't care.
He didn't care what the outcome was, which takes us to what woke people do.
They care only about the outcome.
And so when you only care about the outcome, you do stupid shit.
Those trees are blocking my view. You cut those trees down with no thought that then the soil erodes, that the tree was was holding a place and your house slides down the fucking hill.
And that's why they think it's okay to be racist to fight racism.
Because they're fucking morons.
Because in the end, they can't think three moves ahead or one move ahead and be like, well, then all you have left is racists.
And you can just tell CrossFit Inc. is completely lost.
And don't get me wrong.
It was hard being around someone like greg who
has such a huge big picture vision all the time every once in a while you're like can't we just
sell some like you know like sell a protein bar and we all make an extra hundred thousand this
year can't we just sell the sweatshirt yeah people are gonna like the sweatshirt yeah yeah yeah yeah
he hated anything that was brand
diminishing he wanted like it's so funny because people complain he wanted to give everything away
free but he wanted the crossfit shoe to be 600 that's what's so funny so people are like now
like no bill charges so much greg would have loved greg wanted the crossfit shoe to be 300 bucks
it's not for everyone the shoe's bullshit The shoe isn't for everyone. But the programming is for everyone and it's free.
You know, it's like.
Yeah.
He didn't care.
He doesn't care if Coca-Cola sponsored the games, but he would be up there making fun of them all the way to the bank.
So, yeah, they seem to.
What's going on here in the comments?
Did you watch TV?
I watch. so yeah they seem to uh what's going on here in the comments did you watch tv so on i watch um
uh i watch um i watch some tv when i ride the assault bike i usually will watch like some
stuff or like today the algorithm gave me a jordan peterson video and i watched it it was
like 22 minutes it was pretty crazy it, man, he's fucking something else.
And,
um,
I watch UFC on Saturday nights.
I'll watch arm wrestling tomorrow.
Cause John Brzezinski arm wrestling.
Is that tomorrow?
Travis never got back to us,
huh?
Yeah.
No,
no.
Tomorrow's Friday.
It's Saturday.
So you guys say,
I watch embed.
I watch embedded the ufc embedded
show um when i ride the assault bike they're little nine minute episodes uh watch maybe
i watch them like cnn or tucker carlson or msnbc like or abc clips if like youtube puts them in my
algorithm um mostly you know now i just watch that shit to be excited about like come talk to him
about shit for you guys on the show come find shit to share with you guys
greg glassman knew so much genius man or should i say he knows so much someone will you bring him
on yes it's very soon very very very very very very very very i mean i plan on bringing him on
very soon he says he's going to come on after the 1st of January sometime.
Big fight this weekend.
I'm not an Amanda Nunes fan at all.
Zero.
Zero.
I don't know why either.
She's not bad.
Dave gave away a bunch of Every Second Counts DVDvds did you see that post i did and he mentioned
that carrie peterson made the movie and purposely left me out i i hadn't i noticed that some other
guy imagine that imagine i slave to make this fucking movie slaved.
We gotta bring up the clip now that and Dave post on his Instagram
he's giving away
every second counts DVDs and then
doesn't mention my name or tag me.
But also did you see
the clip that he showed?
The success of the
2018 documentary
it's already number one on iTunes for
documentaries and top 10 for all already number one on iTunes for documentaries and top
10 for
all movies right now on iTunes.
I'm going to throw it back
to every second count.
I have all these copies
of the original CrossFit
Games documentary. This one
was made in 2009
or 2008 actually,
but 2008 Cross crossfit games by um kerry peterson one of our
producers back then and videographers he and some other guy did a great job
he and by the way congratulations mariah mariah i don't know i don't know if she
i don't know what her last name is mar Mariah Moore, Mariah Oldroyd for getting the 2018 documentary done.
It's quite the story.
I wonder if, hey, those of you who've seen her be interviewed about it,
did she talk about how it was hidden and that it could have been lost forever?
I mean, shit, the backstory on it might even be better in the movie.
I don't know.
I haven't seen the movie.
No, I'm not in Arizona anymore.
And I got to apologize just for how shitty I've been this last week.
The shows have been a fucking disaster.
My scheduling has been a disaster.
I'm back home.
I'm going to get everything in order.
I'm going to stop these live calling shows and actually bring you real guests.
Shitload of real guests.
We're going to go on a terror.
No Omnicron can stop me.
Yeah, we have so many cool people in the pipeline
that we're just going to just start laying down.
It's going to be some good guests coming up.
What's your opinion on Dave Castro's post about hog hunting
and all the hate around it?
You know, I understand all the hate around it. You know, I understand all the hate around it.
Seeing dead shit on Instagram and on the internet is hard to see.
When I first started working at CrossFit, they would post pictures of, like, dudes who've hunted bears.
They showed a guy who had killed so many bunnies, and he wrote Happy Easter with dead bunnies.
And I worked there, and I hated that shit.
I hated that shit. I hated that shit.
Yeah.
But what's funny,
what the thing about the hogs is so crazy.
I don't know.
I don't know if it's my place to,
I don't know if it's my place to say any of this.
I,
I guess I can say it cause Dave's never going to say it.
Or is that why I don't say it?
He fucking gives that meat away.
If you guys saw where he kills – first of all, those things are doing bad shit to his property.
I forget what it is, but there's a fucking gazillion of them, and they're doing bad things to his property.
And he kills them, and then his neighbors are – they're like the most hardcore mexicans you've
ever seen not like hardcore like you've seen in the movie colors i'm talking like they're his
neighbors own like cows and bulls and they do weddings and they march down the street and they
have mariachi bands and they fucking like the kid rides a horse instead of a fucking bike or a
scooter on dave street i mean it's it's it's it's they're like fucking what are those guys called
caballeros what's a mexican cowboy they look like they fell out of a fucking clint easter movie
and so dave kills that calls them all those dudes come over they skin it and they divvy up the meat
and shit and i just feel like everyone's so judgment but i get it but i get their side too
it's hard seeing dead shit but don't be a hypocrite but it's it is
sad but you're a fucking prejudgmental asshole for not for just for just saying that no one even
asked dave do you eat the meat i mean he's giving it to and these people aren't wealthy these people
are poor i think they're poor projecting on them they look poor to me they don't got a fucking
250 philson hat they don't got these glasses I got from the four seasons that were
$1,800 and got this
Filson vest oh speaking of rich
these fucking jackasses
at Victo's
I'm not doing this
again you assholes you have to sponsor
me
these guys make the best shoe i found these in my
closet a brand new pair of core i know how gangster are these dude those are cool these are so and
they're the nano 2 these are the nano 2 if you like the nano 2 but like but with man colors and shit like like like i swear to god
my t-count goes up i got a little swagger when i wear these they're comfortable and these jackasses
i wrote them a fucking letter being like dude come on guys sponsor me hook it up just something
like sponsor like friends guys you get listen listen i don't need a job. Barbelljobs.com.
I don't need it.
Barbelljobs.com.
I don't need a job.
I don't go to barbelljobs.com.
I honestly don't think I'm competent enough to get a job at barbelljobs.com.
I love them.
There's nothing.
I'm not selling my soul by accepting them as a sponsor.
I like what they're doing.
Working is important.
I love working. by accepting them as a sponsor. I like what they're doing. Working's important.
I love working.
All right, these posted job totals are going up too.
That's awesome.
But I would be scared to get a job at a gym.
Like taking someone's life and telling them how to move
and hoping you don't hurt them
and the whole goal is just to fucking save their life
and make them better people.
I'd rather – like for me, when I used to do that shit,
I did it at a park.
And then people just came and I just coached them for free.
But I would have – if I – I probably would have grown a set
and eventually charged them, I bet.
But anyway, barbelljobs.com is our real sponsor.
These jackasses right here, they don't give me shit.
And this shoe is so light and so nice.
I don't think it's maybe – I suspect it's not as made as well as the Nano.
The truth is I don't really know because I don't train in them because I don't want to fuck them up because they're so beautiful.
But my last pair, I wore wore them down the bottoms down until
like until it's nothing they're so nice i work out they're good you do have a pair yeah i i've
done rope climbs in them and actually they've been my workout shoes for probably like the last like
two two to four months oh so you like them and did you get him because i endorsed him yep well fuck you guys sponsor
they're not they're not next to me anyway the only reason why i'm talking about it again
this is the weirdest part you ready i told myself like a month ago you've got to stop plugging people
for free like i was like it was like i was going to bed stop you know get channel your inner matt fraser and just only sell coca-cola i'm i'm gonna say i disagree with the matt fraser method
okay well anyway these fucking guys sent me a box of cheese yesterday i got home from scottsdale
and there's a whole box of cheese and i'm like who's giving me all this cheese and it's from
victos it's merry christmas how do these guys even have my address? That's awesome.
You bought cheese, I assume.
That's fucking crazy.
They sent you cheese.
I know. They know.
They know.
You're on their radar. That's the first step.
I know. They know.
Give value first.
Mars, how's the job hunting going, buddy?
Oh, dude, it's so good. I mean, I'm looking right now for a job. Dude, I tell you Mars, how's the job hunting going, buddy? Oh, dude, it's so good.
I mean, I'm looking right now for a job.
Dude, I tell you what, there's tons of shit on here, my man.
Good.
Mars is one of our regular callers.
I wish he was just some stupid hot chick that's just made me frazzled
instead of some dude I just want to hang up on,
but I'm so desperate for a regular caller yeah you know i actually think that the reason you're 27 minutes
into the show without a phone call is because everyone's being afraid of getting hung up on
that's good i appreciate you coming up with an excuse for me
hey dude the i think the average youtube show has 52 bots and we have 59 viewers right now
so yeah i'm sure that there's no bots they wouldn't send any bots in your direction i'm
pretty sure they want your show to die because you're talking too much hey listen listen i gotta
get 10 000 subscribers i don't think i've ever said to subscribe or like on a show we have got
to get
to ten thousand fucking subscribers and here's the reason why i think at ten thousand something
happens in the algorithm do you want to know something crazy about the subscriber count that
i that's just blew me away right so you know that akira the Don guy I keep harassing you about? Yeah, maybe. He's a musician?
He's a DJ.
He's a DJ.
Makes a lot of music.
He posted a clip with his music today.
Okay.
Oh, that's his music?
Yeah, that's his music.
The one where my kid's skateboarding, that's his music?
Yeah, the Jocko one, yeah.
Oh, shit.
I didn't even know that was Jocko talking.
Okay.
Yeah.
There was a... It's crazy like there were a lot of people
Listening in but his subscriber count
You know never really went up
And there was all these people that were saying
It seems like I'm getting unsubscribed
That's where I subscribed to you before
And the best thing was
He had a
Subscriber party For like I don know, 69,000 people or something.
And YouTube decided to purge a bunch of followers.
And like an hour before his subscribe party, it went to 68,400.
It went to what?
It went to 68,400.
As if like 600 people unsubscribed
oh shit
in my mind it's BS
I mean it was like an hour before
and then all of a sudden
600 people drop off the map
yeah I doubt it
it's kind of just google and people fucking with people
yeah that is with him it's I don't know I people fucking with people. Yeah.
With him,
with him.
I don't know.
I don't know if he's for sure shadow.
Well,
some stuff is shadowed,
but not as hardcore as you are.
That's for sure.
Well, thank you.
How come they haven't kicked me,
kicked me off yet?
I don't know.
You need to find an insurrection for January 6th and then they might talk about it.
How can you, do you know how that's an insurrection? Can you argue the insert?
Oh God, there's a guy calling from Gaylord, Michigan.
That's too awesome. You got to drop me for that.
Okay. I love you. Bye.
Well, you're so open-minded. Tell me how you got so open-minded.
Hello? well you're so open-minded tell me how you got so open-minded hello oh this is yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah hello yeah hey is this a seven podcast this is
wow i finally made it on i've looked up to you guys since i was a little kid oh my god
you know what's crazy what what phone is that your personal phone you're calling from
yeah dude yeah it says spam risk
no no it's not spam it's not a spam risk call dude i'm so fucking excited i have a huge boner right
now prove it prove it bat like prove it what can you do to prove it can you like you slap the tip
of it so it goes yeah yeah there you go there you go there you go i heard it i heard it i just
put it on the ground just for you just for you i heard it I heard it. I heard it. I just hit it on the ground. Just for you. Just for you.
I heard it.
I heard it.
Where are you calling from?
Are you calling from Gaylord, Michigan?
Yeah, yeah.
How did you know?
That's where all the faggots are from, bro.
All right.
You can't use that word on this show.
This is a woke show. I apologize.
I apologize.
It won't happen again hey
I like your nose
can you do like huge lines of cocaine
with that fucking thing
huge
yeah it looks like it
man I wish I had a nose like that
see I can only take it in little
itty bitty amounts
hey I know where you can take it I can hear it in your voice
don't lie to us we know where you can take it. I can hear it in your voice. Don't lie to us.
We know where you take it.
Oh, yeah, definitely.
Every day.
Only for you, though, big guy.
Armband sponsor.
Yes, Logan.
Okay, well, I appreciate the nose jokes.
I tried to rebut with you taking a dick in your ass.
I appreciate the hard penis comments.
We're just not getting anywhere with it.
We're going to have to try again.
Wait, wait, wait.
I really just wanted to say that niggers are primitive animals.
Oh.
Do you think it's him calling back it's a spam risk again it was
uh this dude is drunk or high i just watched our house movie
by the way i don't think that's even i don't think that's funny by the way
what he said i don't i don't think um like i'm not i'm not the word nigger doesn't offend me
in any way and if it does offend someone i know it's their problem but i don't think like I'm not I'm not the word nigger doesn't offend me in any way.
And if it does offend someone, I know it's their problem.
But I don't think it's I don't think you should say anything to go out of your way to offend someone unless all the time we're scared to deal with the consequences.
And I have no intention of purposely offending anyone.
I have intentions of sharing the truth.
And I don't even think what he said is funny.
Yeah, I want to shake my head at him.
He's a – I wish you wouldn't listen.
I wish you wouldn't listen to the show.
I wish you wouldn't listen. I wish you wouldn't listen to the show. I wish you would
purr.
I was surprised you let it when you said that I thought
you were going to cut it, but I knew you were curious
as to what was going to happen.
I should have. I just don't like it.
I just don't.
I watched our house movie and it was incredible.
Oh, thank you.
Thanks.
That is loud. That's him. He just keeps calling back from Houston.
God bless the iPhone.
Look at me.
I used to say, God damn it, Jesus Christ, and now I say, God bless.
I fucking made a 180.
Armband sponsor would be good.
Oh, shit.
Is this the last Colin show?
No, no.
I don't think it's the last Colin show. I just feel like when I do them, I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel. Okay. We talked about Victos. Um, uh, did you see that, uh, do you want to talk about and yes the one that died from COVID
appears that he has
serious
comorbidities unfortunately
in that
interview today
hey I had a question for you Susan have you ever seen a female
garbage person
i don't think i have i was i'm actually trying i would like literally tried to think but no i don't
i don't think i have has anyone ever seen a female garbage person i mean i'm sure there's
there's some out there right like i'm talking about the dude who likes it like yeah like
yeah yeah like either someone who drives the truck about the dude who like, like, yeah.
Like either someone who drives the truck or the dude who gets out of the
truck.
Oh, you have, huh?
Tell me more, Steven.
Tell me more.
I'm not talking about the lady at the dump who collects your money when you
drive through the truck.
I seen her too.
She's hot.
Dude, you cannot keep calling from houston
houston is banned for the rest of the show banned from the rest of the show i sell garbage trucks
and i've seen them you sell how much is a garbage truck wow probably like millions of dollars now
yeah wow high hundred thousand i sell garbage trucks and i've seen them what do you mean you
sell them and you've seen them you that the person who the person on the on the on the
in the chain of command uh who drives the truck is a block denise or dennis i would block his
number but he's calling from like 10 different numbers and that's why it's spam risk he's
working somewhere and he's listening to it where he's access to a
shitload of phone lines,
South Louisiana.
I seen it all.
I see it all.
Yeah.
That doesn't matter.
That's not,
Oh,
here we go.
There are over 58,000,
477 sanitation workers currently employed in the United States.
Yeah.
I think those 20% are like,
they're like the management or the lady who works, like who takes the money at the dump or she weighs your truck.
I just haven't seen them.
And as a dude, at least for me, I'm in tune with that shit.
Not whether they're men or women, but I look at garbage trucks.
I'm still like a little kid.
If I see a garbage truck, I watch it.
I watch it smash shit.
I watch the dudes inside.
I watch how they jump out. I watch the arm like the shit never gets old i'm just yeah are you a really observant person like are you one of those like as you drive through a light
you know what the person next to you is doing the cars that you pass for like the next five minutes
you could tell what all their colors were and how many there were no i'm not like a cop where i'm
like i'm not like okay that where i'm like i'm not
like okay that was a man he's five nine that's a chick that's a black dude that's a hispanic that
but i am like um i am like i'm i look around i i i mean no one knows when they're on autopilot
because it's seamlessly integrated with your moments fleeting moments of consciousness that's so scary but um
but i but it seems like i'm i'm always conscious like i'm always making some
i don't ever just drive from point a to point b i drive i'm like dude i'm in a car yeah yeah i'm
like shifting i'm flowing through the lanes i'm using my signal i'm like i'm driving
it's like a fucking video game i never just i'm just like oh point a to point b blah blah blah
right i'm like i'm either like purposely trying to go too fast or purposely trying to go too slow
sorry go ahead yeah no i was just saying i'm i'm wearing the sense and i always thought like
everybody was that observant but i would we'd go on like a plane ride to a vacation you know
and then i would recognize the passenger of the plane while we're out on vacation yes
yes yes yes how how about we thought i how about this fucking thing drives me crazy and i see it
every single day i'm driving and there's three lanes and everyone's in two of the lanes like 18
cars in two lanes and no one in the left lane and it's not even like at the next light that lane's gone or that those other two are forced to turn off or there's nothing.
It's just it's just the way the traffic works.
If you don't pay attention and turn on your left signal and get in that left lane, that lane would stay empty.
It's like, right. It's so weird how autopilot.
Yeah. And I'm like, dude, you're going to miss like you're going to be stuck here for two lights driving like that like an idiot and it ruins everything for everyone that's why like
sometimes when i'm cutting people off and i'm speeding through traffic if the person with me
then my car is like hey dude you shouldn't be driving like that i'm like really i'm doing
everyone a favor just getting out of everyone's way so they can just cruise around like idiots
i can't wait till all the cars drive themselves i didn't think there would be as
many female workers as male carriers until i started working there just as all we saw dudes
delivering mail oh that's a good point okay okay i feel you i've seen a lot of female like uh amazon
ups and usps for sure uh this one time hayley and i were uh my wife and i were in san francisco
and we saw a male carrier and his calves were the biggest calves i've ever seen in any human
being and it made sense because they he walks the steepest hills in the world every single day
pushing that thing and his calves were nuts yeah they were nuts it's weird when you see people with enormous calves right yeah
or people with no calves but you live by the beach so you probably see a lot more shorts yeah tons of
shorts everyone's in shorts one of the things Jordan Peterson said today was is that men are
interested in things and women are interested in people and I thought that was interesting because I think that's one of the traits I have as a man
that makes me a little bit more like a woman.
I'm very interested in people.
I'm very, very interested in people.
And that was one of the arguments
for why there's more female women nurses.
And then I forget what the other job was that he compared to it for men.
And he talked about something in this video that I saw about called biological
instinct and that it points people in the right direction.
And I thought that,
I thought that was very interesting because some people think that I dress my
boys as girls. I let their hair grow long.
I have them wear girls um uh capri pants and um and it's
so and so they they they bring to it a those are clearly things that are not feminine except
culturally feminine they're made up feminine things as opposed to something that's really is feminine
which would be like enlarged breasts or uh uh like this other thing that he said a characteristic of
being interested in people as opposed to things or um or like hitting boys in general hit more
you know like the the kids like when my kids, my three boys hit a lot.
And I think that that's just part of their biological instinct. They hit each other and
wrestle a lot. Not the girls don't. I just think that there's scales to it. Right.
But no matter how long I let my boys hair grow long or how many tights I put on them.
And by the way, I viewed, I viewed all of that as masculine i didn't view it as
feminine at all and uh and uh and i've talked about this before and i would put them in wife
feeders and in those tight pants because i thought that made them look like um um
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What's the Russian ballet guy?
Baryshnikov.
My mom was really like Baryshnikov when I was a kid.
She would talk about how talented he is and how handsome he is.
You know, the male ballet dude?
Yeah. And so I just picture, I'm like'm like well i guess that's what masculine is that's what my and then so i just stuck with me and i was like okay i guess i'm gonna dress my kids to be
hyper masculine but anyway they have a biological instinct that if you see my kids even with their
long hair like if you anyone who ever sees my kids and thought they were girls even when they look
like girls they were they weren't looking thought they were girls even when they look like
girls they were they weren't looking closely they weren't paying attention they weren't conscious
my boys act like fucking boys and if you have three little girls around you will definitely
see it and those girls will know that my boys are boys i just spent the week with greg's three girls
and those three girls know that my boys are three boys and my three boys know that those are three girls.
And it was a beautiful thing to watch.
That's funny.
And if you have three cute little, oh man, my boys are so well behaved.
It's fucking nuts.
I'm going to share one more thing with you that I think is really, really important.
It's super duper, duper important for all human beings.
It's extraordinarily important for young people.
And if you're adult and you can't get a grip on this, then you're fucked.
So here it goes.
You ready?
There's there's.
You can be grounded in your own personal identity.
What do I mean by that? Like you can,
you can be grounded in the fact that you knit and you can get comfort in that. All you need is yarn
and some needles and you can knit and it brings you comfort. It brings you prosperity. It brings
your ability to contribute to the world. It brings you, um, a skill that you can work on to get better at. It's just a
marvelous thing to do. Knitting, right? You're making clothes. It's something you can do. It
does require some tools. Juggling could be the same. It might not be as potent. It might be more
for entertainment. You're not actually making clothes, but it's just you and these balls walking on your hands.
All things that just involve pretty much playing an instrument, playing the piano.
You can use it to entertain yourself. You can get better at it. It can make you smarter.
It cultivates focus. It brings people together. It contributes to the ambiance.
You're a public asset at that time, and you're grounded in yourself and your skill. All of these
things I'm talking about are just you. Drawing, singing, jujitsu, anything that you can do to work on yourself.
I really like singing or whistling.
It's something you can do.
You can play with your voice.
Not me personally.
I don't like them.
I don't practice singing or whistling.
But the fewer tools you need, the better to illustrate the example that I'm going for.
Then on the other hand, and you can build an
identity off of that. You could build it off of reading the Bible, focusing on one religion,
Buddhism, and just follow it and really, really work on yourself. And these are all really
superficial things I'm talking about, by the way, external superficial things, but things you can do
with minimal shit. So you can get the Bible, you can get the Ten Commandments, and you can work just vigorously and with insane discipline to follow the Ten Commandments.
To make yourself a better person.
To work on yourself.
Skateboarding, yes.
Skateboarding.
Another one.
What this does is this allows you to have something really solid that will not change over time at all, except very, very slowly with based on the effort you put in.
Over 10,000 years singing is not going to change that much.
If, especially now in this day and age, you have your focus outside of you for your identity, you are fucked.
Because you will never get your footing.
Because the outside world is changing so fast.
It is changing so fast.
And it's so crazy to me. I hear people complaining that they didn't get enough likes on, on something on Instagram. I don't even look at that except to laugh at myself.
I had a video up the other day for like 12 hours and it had 43 likes. I have 93,000 followers,
92,000 followers. Like, dude, what, like, what are you doing? Making that like any part of your.
And I get it. It's hard, especially if you didn't have parents who taught you this. It's so hard
for me. I just want it to be liked by people. As a kid, I just wanted boys and girls to like me.
You know how fucking hard that is to, how are you supposed – isn't that funny?
I'm making fun of people who want to get likes on Instagram, and yet the next thing out of my mouth is I just wanted people to like me.
I guess I was one of those people, but it was before Instagram.
I wanted real likes, and wanting real likes isn't better than wanting Instagram likes.
So that chump I was just talking about, I guess I was talking about myself.
Trump I was just talking about. I guess I was talking about myself.
There's nothing you can do to get people to like you, except if you want it to be lasting liking and something good. You would do it just by focusing on yourself and getting good at the piano, getting good at singing, getting good at following the Ten Commandments, getting good at like.
I mean, let's face it. I'll use Rich Froning as an example.
You could hate every fucking Christian in the world and think Christianity is stupid.
51% of the reason Rich Froning is so fucking cool is because he fucking follows the Bible, whether you know it or not.
He's taken that shit to heart and it's made him a fucking great person.
And at least I would propose that. i'm open to being wrong i'd
propose that maybe it's in 94 of the reason why he's such a cool person
and he really is a cool person he's not just great crossfitter so uh uh where was i going
with this so those are the two things if If you, if you, if you base your identity in something outside of you, Facebook, how many friends you have, what kind of car you drive,
all of that shit is going to die by the wayside. And your happiness is going to be owned by a
rock hitting your windshield, not getting enough likes on your Instagram account. Um, your boyfriend
breaking up with you, it's going to be bullshit. And then the next best way is to build your
happiness. And what's so obvious about this is my boys actually have this. At seven years old,
my oldest son and all three of my sons are so calm and confident and happy in their own skin
because they've cultivated so many tools already.
They're so happy. They're so confident. They're so calm. They're so in control. They're so cocksure of themselves, not in an arrogant way at all, but the same way a leaf floats on a river
as it goes down the river. I'm just cruising. And it's not in TV. It's not like it was when
I was a kid. I was so proud that I had seen
every single Brady Bunch episode.
I'm not saying it's wrong,
but it's not enough.
And then there's a deeper way.
There's one more way.
Those are the two ways.
And then the other way you can build an identity
is to go completely inward just sit that one doesn't take much except just insane discipline
and no one has that so talk about that way we won't even talk about that way the everlasting
way that gives you eternal confidence and chill we won't even talk about
that are you involved with pulling john too there's a pulling john too are you serious
send put a link up here put a link up here barbelljobs.com buh-bye
i'm i'm glad we had a crank call i'm glad i had someone call and say something like just
completely outlandish but but it's still just gross it's still like couldn't you say something else i would i would rather have
you talk like just keep the attack on me why do you have to like like can't you just like say
something about me or my mom or why do you have to i don't even wonder like what what the hell
do people like that think like how do you like how do you have that much space in your head
you know like i'm so focused on improving everything i have going on with this show or
with my fiance or with my businesses it's like how would you have the space to be like oh let me call
and either try to offend or throw the show off or offend another group of people that you know it's
like why maybe it's someone who's get out like why maybe it's someone who's out of that
maybe it's someone who's so much like deeper and evolved at us that they did it on purpose
so we could talk about that they were giving us the opportunity that's what i like about you
seven just keep going bigger and bigger picture yeah you know just zoom out baby just zoom out a little more that's all um i was uh i was uh
i was thinking about where my self-righteousness comes from and this moral high ground that i walk
on and this holier than thou not that i'm better than other people at all but but i just this
self-belief in myself and that my shit don't stink.
And do you know where it comes from?
And I encourage everyone to cultivate some of their own, and there's probably a ton of it in the CrossFit community, is the fact that ideally you – there's something about not taxing the system.
The least you tax the system and the more you contribute, the happier and more cocksure you are, right?
So if you're an obese person, you want to carry your own weight literally and figuratively on the planet.
You don't want to be taking more than you're giving, even if you don't know it.
Even if you don't know that's what you don't want, I think that's a biological instinct that we all want to stay within the parameters of giving as much as we're taking.
But I have no idea if I'm giving as much as we're taking, but I have no idea if I'm giving as much as I,
if I'm taking,
maybe I'm just a,
maybe I just take tons,
but relative to my cohort,
my peers,
my colleagues,
my fellow humans,
I'm at the fucking top of the food chain.
I was thinking about that the other day.
I was like,
man,
like 99% of the guys I see,
I could whoop their ass.
But 99% of those those guys if they worked out
half as hard as i did they could whip my ass do you know what i mean they're all like genetically
like i'm like all right he's taller he's better looking he's yeah you know but but they're just
not doing nothing like they've gone the opposite way you've given the recipe if someone lets you
sleep at their house you wake up you clean the mess any mess that you had there you clean all your personal stuff you clean their, you clean the mess, any mess that you had there,
you clean all your personal stuff,
you clean their mess, you do the dishes,
and you leave before they wake up.
And that's how you always get invited back.
Can you use that as like a,
can that be like a metaphor
just for how you treat the earth?
It should be.
Because I mean, think about that.
If you operated like that all the time,
there's no way, and you truly had discipline
and you didn't, of course, weren't had drugs.
I'm like, how long could you really even be homeless?
How long would it be before you just continue to add value, add value, add value to people
in certain ways to where you just got everything you wanted, which I do believe is literally
your story, right?
I mean, it's not like you had a strategy plan out of that.
There was no master strategy out of that.
Just discipline, hard work, and bringing value in all those layers built up over time yeah you nailed it
god greg sent me the nicest text today hey sebon would you have eric rosa on the podcast
matt's saying yes i would just love to see you have a conversation i'm a i mean i'm a little
scared because i've talked so much shit i mean i've talked it's like i've talked so much shit
i mean of course i would if someone like from hq reached out to me it was like hey eric wants to
come on the podcast i'd love to have him on the podcast the thing is is that to maintain my
integrity with the shit i've talked it could get get, it could get weird. It could get, it could get weird. I don't, I don't,
it could get weird. It could get weird. It could get weird.
We're really quick.
I got to have to ask him some really fucking hard questions.
What is the vision for the company?
And if he started doing that happiness and I'm like,
why did you buy this? And i would just start digging into like i don't think it's good my 50 cent fucking uh
you know what's it called armchair psychologist does not doesn't is not getting a good good read
from the situation like it's not good i wonder if the board of directors uh grill them like that
this thing the thing is is part where where they've gone i'm gonna say this i said this so
many times i'm gonna say it again it's funny it was scary to say the first time and now it's like
i'm bored of saying it's not even scary there is a um this company is selling personal accountability personal accountability
and personal responsibility those things are not sellable it's really really tough those aren't
marketable items a matter of fact there's a whole political movement there's a whole pressure from half this
country there's a whole ideology that wants to avoid it at all costs avoiding discomfort this
this company is selling discomfort there's there are in the metaphor i kept using over and over
and over is is that they they this these berkshire guys think they bought Harley-Davidson, but they bought – oh, shit.
I didn't bring my phone in here.
I can't text this person.
Berkshire thinks they bought Harley-Davidson, but they bought the Hells Angels.
The Hells Angels don't make meth.
They don't make motorcycles.
They take meth up and down the coast in the motorcycles they buy that's part of their brand.
CrossFit doesn't make up movements. and a certain diet hoping to make the fittest people in the world based on the first ever scientific definition of what fitness is, which he gave.
And you want to know, like, either people are super stupid or incredibly naive
when they say he didn't invent anything.
That's like saying Newton didn't invent anything.
Okay, fine, Newton did not invent gravity.
Go after Newton, leave greg alone what he did is he labeled something that we still don't know what it is today is gravity
and half you fuckers still believe it is gravity but that's a whole nother conversation but that
greg defined something and that's what started the whole fucking ball rolling.
And it's just a, and then a group of us got together.
And so then, of course, then what happens is these people start doing it like Navy SEALs start doing it. And they do it, why?
Because it helps them save, the fitness to them and to firefighters and to first responders,
fitness is like the cornerstone of their survival.
Like if they're, like, I'm sure a ton of those guys have lives have been saved because they did
CrossFit or because they were in shape, but maybe it's not just CrossFit, but, but if your life
depends on your fitness, then there's nothing better than CrossFit. And once those guys endorsed
it based on that and that, that type of lifestyle, the thing just exploded. And why? Because pussies
like me that lived in Berkeley, California wanted to do like for, didn't want to do buds, but they wanted to do a workout
that Dave Castro or Josh Bridges or Eli Crane did. That's literally why I started. My buddy,
my buddy was in the air force and he's like, Oh, I do these workouts. And we did a bunch of them.
And then he actually got deployed and I go, wait, who's going to come up with the workouts? You
know? Cause it's about me and not him going to to war and what's the first thing these cunts do at hq darn it i wish i
wouldn't have name called they get rid of hero wads they've changed hero wads something has
happened at hq like anyone can get a wad now i don't oh i don't think you can call twice in one
show i'm pretty sure you can't call twice in one show.
You're not going to say any racial slurs, are you?
Please don't.
No.
I'm actually a little upset that I told you to hang up on me
for Gaylord, Michigan.
Thank you for taking responsibility.
You know what's crazy?
That dude has like a crazy phone bank of phones to call from.
I don't know if that's like a VPN thing.
And he was going through like his directory.
He's like,
he's like gay Lord.
That sounds funny.
We probably just fricking pick that.
Cause he's a 12 year old showed.
No,
that dude wasn't 12.
I like,
I like some others.
Someone said that that guy lives in a basement or something.
Matt,
you need to reach out to Rose ASAP for the podcast.
It will help Eric with his stress.
You're a good dude.
What's up, Mars?
What do you need?
What do you need?
Well, my favorite thing about CrossFit is everybody talks about how it's so beneficial for your mental health.
Yes.
And then the CEO of the company is talking about how he has major problems with his mental health.
Right. of the company is talking about how he has major problems with his mental health. And I feel like it just kind of takes
the pillar away a little bit or gives
those naysayers a little
more ammunition.
I didn't think of it like that,
but I think that the big thing with this guy is
that
I think we kind of touched on it. He probably
doesn't... Anyway, whatever. Okay. Yeah, you're right. Gives a little bit of the naysayers. I don't kind of touched on it. He's probably, he probably doesn't anyway,
whatever.
Okay.
Yeah,
you're right.
Gives a little bit of the naysayers.
I don't want to pile on.
I don't want to pile on him.
He's,
but,
but,
but I don't want to pile on him.
I don't want to pile on him anymore.
All right.
What if he comes on the show?
Yeah,
no,
you're,
you're either solidifying the fact that he won't,
or you're just making it worse when he does yeah um i think i've said i think he's handsome and he has a nice body yeah i mean i
know that's superficial but there's a piece of me that is quite superficial i like the shit i'm
wearing his hair that's pretty nice yeah his hair i like his hair i like the shaved look yeah
yeah i'm a little disappointed, actually.
I don't have a really long beard this time of year because I really, really wanted me some Armenian Santa Claus.
I don't know what I'm doing with my facial hair.
I don't know what I'm doing with my look right now.
I have no idea.
Someone said I look like Hulk Hogan, and that fucking threw me for a loop.
I'm so easily frazzled you know what i love all i did was shave this i didn't even know
what i was doing i was like just going like this with the one shaver and i just went up and then i
stopped and then i don't even know what i'm doing i i really don't know what i'm doing there's some
real gold if you scroll through instagram on
on savann's page i just there's a picture of you and i think you're half gone with like a glass of
whiskey and some women's sunglasses on it is fantastic there are there are memes to be written
about uh many of the posts on savann's uh instagram yeah look at there's how
ah i see it i see the resemblance i see it yeah um i was gonna ask okay so i see a lot of your
posts about parenthood or you know just you're raising your kids and i mean i don't know i've
had a few moments when i'm raising my son lately i feel like i don't know. I've had a few moments when I'm raising my son lately.
I feel like, I don't know if it's like a terrible twos
or if everybody goes through it where you just feel like,
I don't know, I feel like I have a teenager and he's two years old.
And I don't, do you ever, did you ever have that?
I mean, I know you had twins,
so I don't know if they just both ganged up on you
and tied you down and tortured you or if it was just smooth sailing the whole way.
You have to ask my wife, because every time I talk about my kids, I'm going to tell you something.
I make it seem like it's the easiest thing in the world, and I'm the best dad in the world.
You really do, and that's why I'm asking you.
I know.
She's like, if you have her here, she'll be like, what are you talking about?
I saw you lose your shit and go outside and throw a suitcase over the backyard fence.
I'm like, what? gotta just okay fine keith fine fine fine
fuck off fine keith fun facts have on his groucho marks reincarnated fine need a dick bye-bye
jesus criminy that's the third show in a row he's been writing that shit hey this guy Travis Bellinghausen
sent me an email
I need to forward to you
all of you people who have offered to help
and I've given you my email and I have not followed through
there's only one thing to say
I'm a douche
there's one last thing
yes
hey you know what happened today
my Avi was being bad in the morning There's one last thing, Siobhan. Yes. I'm curious. Hey, you know what happened today?
Avi was being bad in the morning.
And I – oh, what was he doing?
We just got back from Scottsdale last night late.
He woke up this morning.
He was in a bad mood.
He's sitting at the table, and he's crying.
I've never seen him do that. He's 70.
He's at the breakfast table, and he's crying.
And he's doing it like the Peanuts character.
Ah!
Ah! His mouth is wide open. And and i'm like and i just got up my back is so fucking sore like i can when every morning when i wake up i can barely wash my hands because it feels like if i do my my
whole body's gonna break in half and fall over which is crazy because two hours later i can
touch my toes like it's nothing it's just weird but so i i'm
like dude if you do that again like i'm gonna take you to your room or you're gonna go to your room
and you can scream all you want in there but i can't have you just out here holding the whole
kitchen hostage okay i say just chill like that and he just looks at me goes so i i go over to
him i pick him up and i'm squeezing him so tight because if he gets off my midline, I'm going to fucking break in half.
I get him halfway to his room
and I have to set him down.
Then I'm just gently walking
with him to his room. We get to his room. He goes,
I'm not staying in here. He just
pushes me and my back's so fucked up.
I can't stop him.
I drop to one knee.
I just
start laughing so hard like a tear comes out of
my face i'm like but but the other option was to kill him right like he just whooped his dad's ass
and he said man these are the joys of being a geriatric father so i just go out there and i
just i just look he's sitting there at the table and he looks at me he's got this big shit eating
grand and i got this big shit eating grand and I got this big shit eating grand.
And I'm thinking to myself,
if you don't say anything,
I won't say anything.
Like if you don't tell your brothers and your mom,
you just pushed me out of the way.
Oh,
fuck.
Oh man.
I know.
That's so sad.
So sad.
Hey,
uh, so, uh, uh, sad. Hey, so, yeah, Dave should be CEO.
Oh, Emily Abbott. So today, Kate Gordon says this weekend's going to be her last show for two weeks.
She's moving.
Yeah, she's moving on, man.
So, no, she'll be back.
She loves it too much.
She loves the followers it gives her.
It's not getting carried away here.
And so I asked, I was going to ask Sarah Sigmundsduder to step in for her.
Please.
Oh, yeah, he just jumped on that.
But the time thing with sarah could get really weird
because she's in dubai yeah but won't hobart do it whenever
sarah's so fucking hot fuck off do it at 3 a.m if she wants to fuck you guys
you know the thing is is i want to do the show so it's every sunday at
six so like i want to like have like the truck driver who drives that like fucking or the dude
the divorced dad who has to go drive his kid home on sunday night for three hours he always has that
show you know what i mean like i just want it to be consistent for that oh that's cool what about
cleba here's the thing about here's the thing i really want either a chick a black dude or a gay dude
you know because
well savann you're because i'm a sexist homophobe racist and i'm and i need and i need i don't know
i just feel like we already have hobart who's like bi and we got me who's like crazy straight
and we should at least we should have something
else like
I don't think Cassandra would let him be bi
well you know what I mean
you know what I mean
he's fastidious he's clean
like he wears deodorant I bet
and
so
so then
I was thinking
I don't know if Sarah S sigman's daughter scratches any of
those sarah sigman's daughter scratches any of those but man she's so fucking cool that show
was so fun with her and she's hot as shit but uh i i asked emily abbott if she would do it
and i think emily abbott's fun and hot as shit too. So... I'm going to let you
hang up on me after this. Sarah was
like one of your best
interviews and
also I want to say
your last Colin show was
freaking hilarious. So I know you said you were off
in Arizona, but that was literally
or not Colin, the new show.
Did you like it just because they were beating up
on me?
No, they were beating up on Hobart.
Oh, good.
Okay, good.
But I am curious.
Can you do an audio commentary with Greg Glassman
where you guys do audio commentary for The Human Centipede?
Here's the thing.
Here's the thing.
I want to tell you something about Greg.
If Greg and I did a show together,
we would fucking take over the airwaves.
There would be no one who could stop us.
We would rule the universe.
The thing is that Greg is so smart, and he still doesn't want the world to know how funny he is.
So I don't think he's – he's so – I think he loves hanging his hat on.
But, like, when it's just me and – like, I was at his house for like seven days and we're just we're just crying. We're dying. To penis size. I mean.
God the world needs to see that.
If he would partner up with me.
We could have any fucking guest we wanted.
But I don't know if he's going to let himself.
I don't know if he's going to let himself hang like that.
I want him to so bad.
He's so fucking funny.
He's so creative.
It's nuts.
Him and his sister always do this they they do
word fuckery like they make words up but anyway all right i'm up okay bye bye love you bye
i weren't 12 minutes longer than i thought we were gonna go yeah at least mars called back
gave us a good taste in our mouth for callers again. Please don't use that phrase.
Weakness is not vulnerability.
It was interesting.
I was embarrassed for the people.
I was embarrassed for.
I was impressed with how Jordan Peterson handled these three people today who were interviewing him.
It was a 2018 interview.
It was somewhere in. It was either in Norway or Switzerland or it was in one of the Nordic countries in northern Europe.
And I was, like, embarrassed for him, proud of him, embarrassed for those people.
They were saying the dumbest shit to them, to him.
And these were, like, PhDs in, like, psychology and sociology.
And the shit they were saying to him was so
fucking i was so embarrassed like he had to explain to them they're like and why are you
against vulnerability he's like i'm not against vulnerability it's like well you're against men
showing weakness he's like you can't use the word weakness and vulnerability interchangeably and he
has to then define weakness and define vulnerability for them.
And they're just so sloppy in their questioning and their thoughts.
It's like when – and maybe I'm just out there, but it's just like when someone says to me something like, men need to show their sensitivity and be okay with hugging.
I want to be like, who the fuck are you talking about?
Like, why are we talking?
What do you mean?
I hug 10 times the amount of dudes that I hug as chicks.
Like, what are you talking about?
I don't know what world these people live in.
It's like they project all of their
fucking shit onto the whole world hey man the whole world's not there or maybe they are and
i'm just not there i'm just cooler than everyone um laura horvat what a new show that would be
i don't think we can get her that would be good it'd be funny but like but i'm pretty insecure
um but but emily said she would do it and we can we can do it yeah yeah But Emily said she would do it. And we can ask Sarah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She said she'd do it.
Yeah, yeah.
I think she is teaching a course in – she's either teaching or taking a course in Cabo San Lucas right now on pelvic floors.
I don't even know what the pelvic floor is.
The bottom of your uterus.
But anyway, I talk about the pelvic floor a lot.
He's balling out of control.
I don't know if Greg would podcast.
He is balling out of control.
It is.
Do you know him, Dustin?
Have you seen the balling?
It is nuts.
It is nuts. It is nuts.
I cannot believe you woke fuckers gifted Greg all that shit.
All right.
So do we have anyone on the schedule right now?
Yeah.
Well, yes, we have someone on monday and then that's
our only confirmed so we don't want to throw too much out there without but we got like who who
we're bugging dave lipson we're bugging ben bergeron ben bergeron's will be on yep next week uh dave
lipson we're bugging emily abbott we get to that emily abbott we keep threatening to have a
jukevich lazar jukic yep reach out to him um who who else who else do we have oh we have that ufc
fighter christopher anderson christopher johnson yeah graham holberg's on that list oh yeah yeah
um what do we have against What do we have against women?
Do we have any women?
I don't know if we have any women coming up.
We don't have any women listeners.
It'd be nice if we had some women guests.
I think we have a few.
Oh, I'm going to try to do...
So Saturday,
like 10 a.m. Pacific Standard Time,
John Brzezink is arm wrestling Devin Lorette.
I'm sure 99% of you don't give a shit, but shit but i give a shit i'm really fucking excited about it so i'm going
to try to do a show saturday morning with travis and paul lynn um travis is arm wrestle john a
bunch of times and paul lynn was the last guy to arm wrestle john so i'm gonna try to do a show
um and you can watch that on core sports it It's only $8.99. Dani Spiegel, we invited her to be on the show, and she said that her – what did she say?
Morals are going to be more different than yours.
What are morals?
Hold on.
I've got to look that up real quick.
Morals.
And then for those of you guys, I know we've been teasing it for a while now, but Miranda is coming on soon.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we want her soon.
Oh, Miranda's like 10 women in one.
We don't need women.
We got Miranda coming on.
Miranda Alcraz, the owner of Street Parking, co-owner.
Okay, morals are concern with the judgment of right and wrong of human action and character.
Teaching or exhibiting goodness or correctness of character or behavior conforming to standards of what is right or in just behavior, virtuous.
Virtuous.
Having or showing possession of virtue.
Virtue. Hold on.
Virtue.
Conforming to a standard of right morality particularly moral you can't have you can't have
moral be defined as virtue and then virtue be defined back as moral the fuck is wrong with
these people so some of you know this some of you don't know this what whatever it doesn't matter
but when you are um hungry um you have it's a lot of people think it's biological or chemical or whatever.
But basically, you have some sort of agitation in your brain.
That's the inside world or in your body.
And then you go to the outside world to fulfill that need.
It's the same thing with when you're horny.
It's the same thing with when you're angry.
If you're angry, you feel something angry on the inside world, and you go to the outside world to fix it. That is life. That's why that's how unconscious people
do their entire day. The phone rings, they hear the sound on the inside, then they reach out in
the outside and they pick up the phone. They don't question anything. They're just reacting.
They have an itch. They reach up unconsciously and they scratch it on their head. They're just
one thing right after another reacting
if you have something happen on the inside
that you identify with as you as part of something that makes you whole
and you can't get it on the outside a problem will start to occur that's called conflict that
and when you make movies or tell stories it's really
important that you understand that mechanism of the human brain but that's a whole different thing
so let's say you really really really view yourself as a skateboarder and you want to skate
but there's nowhere to skate it's raining or there's no skateboard or you're in antarctica
then you have a conflict.
And it will show up as something else.
Maybe you'll start drawing skateboards.
But it will manifest as something else.
Everything is like that.
So if you believe in ghosts.
And there are no such thing as ghosts.
But you believe in ghosts.
And that's who you are.
You will make sure that you see something that looks like a ghost.
You'll see some wind blow somewhere and move a curtain,
and you will deem it a ghost.
There becomes a market demand for ghosts.
That's what racism is.
It's something inside that people believe in so much that they've made it part of who they are.
And as it was going away in these last 10, 20 years, and especially very, very recently,
the demand for it really increased because as it became less and less, the demand to see it,
because people identified with it as being real increased. And that's why you
get shit like Jesse Smollett. That's why you get when someone white crosses the street,
someone else might say he crossed the street because he's racist. They start looking for it
and projecting it onto everything. There becomes a market demand for it. That's why people like
Danny Spiegel, I'm guessing, I'm'm guessing think that I have different morals in her
because she's confused about her inside reality
and her outside reality
and that's why she would think that we have different morals
the truth is I'm just not quick to judge people
I don't have to react to everything inside of me that demands to be seen on the outside.
I'm beyond that.
I'm wiser than that.
I worked hard to be like this.
Peace and love.
I think that's what it is.
I mean, I think that's what it is. I mean, I think that's what it is. And so what happens is that's why those people are the real racists.
Not Danny Spiegel, but going back to that other thing, is because they're demanding it to be seen.
And you see why they're confused.
Because at any cost, they have to see racism or else they have to give up a little piece of their identity and let that
die oh my god it's not like that you know dudes like that have you ever been with a guy he's like
that bitch wants to fuck me and you're like what the fuck are you looking at you know like that
chick does not want to fuck you but he needs to believe it. It's like that.
I mean,
that's the whole world.
There's no mechanism that works outside of that.
I just explained life to you.
That explains the Bible.
That explains Buddhism.
That explains in believing life after death.
I just gave you a paradigm for fucking thinking of everything.
Don't piss me off it's the conflating of negative human interactions of any kind is solely being racially motivated yeah yeah that but what i'm saying is
even the origin of that is just is just needing something that like if you believe
first of all you even have to believe that racism is real.
Like you have to just jump over the fact that it's actually just an idea.
Now, I'm not saying that there can't be racist ideology.
I'm not saying that there couldn't be a sign that's racist that says like no fucking Jews allowed at that drinking fountain.
Yeah, that sign is racist.
But the – fuck it. Yeah, that sign is racist. But the – you have – fuck it.
I'm not doing this again.
It's too late.
I should teach a philosophy class.
Except the thing is I don't – I just know what I know from just watching my own inside shit.
I don't really know anything.
Dubai champ pretty – yeah, yeah.
So this is – so Susan and I were talking about this today like what are
we going to organize to blow up the dubai shit first of all i asked those i asked the fucking
crown prince to be on the show i dm'd him he's got 12 million followers the crown prince the
fuck is a crown prince but um and he didn't respond to me so then we reached out to the
dubai fitness guys to see if like they would come on the show and they wanted to they they had
questions back from me like hey what what are the questions going to be or something?
I'm like, I don't know what the fuck the questions are going to be, but I just wanted to like,
just jerk you guys off and get like, get people excited about the Dubai fitness challenge.
So I don't know if those guys are coming on. And then, so then, then Suze is saying like,
Hey, like, should we start talking to Brian and John Young? And I go, I don't know. Let's just
wait till the last minute and freak out and see if like everyone just wants to come on the show and do it
but i'm planning on watching it and then suza's like hey do you want like if john and matt can't
john and brian can't do it like i could watch a shitload of it and me and you could do the shows
i'm like dude me and you can't do the fucking shows nor do you want to he's like you're right
it's like i want to do it just like because i want to hang out with john and it's yeah it's really what it's come down to i want to do because
i want to hang out with john and brian and and i'll enjoy like watching the show especially
like if lazar's going sarah's gonna be there but i don't know but i'm sure we'll do something we'll
like right matt like we'll freak out a day or two before and i'll be like oh my god we gotta do this wednesday the show's happening we gotta get a little yep that's how it goes
who wants to hear me sing reggae again
it's hard to believe people actually here's the thing i get offended by i see what you're saying
and i want to agree with you i get offended by shit all the time but but very quickly after i
get offended i i then say it's hard to believe that I get offended by anything knowing as much as I know.
It's fucking ridiculous.
It's like the other – like someone's like, do you hate that person?
And I'm like, yeah, I fucking can't stand that person.
I'm like – but not relative to someone if they did something bad to my kid.
Someone did something bad to my kid.
That person over there I love relative to that.
I mean it's just – no, I don't know who – you have to do something so bad for me to hate you I think.
Because you have to do something to my kids.
Rostitosian.
Oh, nice.
Nice dog.
That's good.
Rostitosian.
Rostitosian. Rastatosin.
And everyone should see that also.
But you have to remember that I used to make a fucking crazy living off of CrossFit.
And then all of a sudden I lost my job there.
So anything negative you hear me say or any bitching you hear, you should run through that and be like, that whiny bitch, he's just pissed because he don't got a job there no more.
Okay.
So feel free to work that angle.
Okay.
I'm not going to sit here with you guys.
Fucking make fun of me.
Fuck off Logan.
Fuck off Sean.
And that,
that didn't,
we already do that with Hobart.
Yeah.
It's like,
okay.
Love you guys.
Take care.
We will be,
we're going to load up this sucker with a ton of guests in the
next two weeks i'm gonna go crazy and bring you guys a ton of guests oh we have a scene malhorta
coming on can we just bring his book up real quick so if we're gonna have this guy on
and what's crazy is i was saying this even though i'm nobody a-s-e-e-m um last name mal m-a-l-h-o-r-t-a and did he did you send
him an email matt um no i was having conversations with him on instagram right now oh okay shit
impressive so he has this book and this is i i knew this just from working with greg and at CrossFit that in 21 days, you could fucking change your whole shit, like your – basically your blood panel.
In 21 days, you could rework your fucking entire blood, your immune system.
I mean you could really get to the 90-yard line in 21 days no matter how fucked up you are.
You can really – if you put in the work like if i told you
that there was some virus that was killing people who ate too much sugar that's the book you want
to read anyway he came out with this book this dude got banned this how the fuck did this dude
get banned from instagram he said nothing wrong he doesn't say any of the crazy shit i say
not even just like hey by the here's a way to help yourself out oh see there it is help
yourself out that is all right he didn't even said the other dudes i don't even hear him saying
the other dudes are wrong nope he's very articulate uh okay um so uh peace and love.
Get your booster.
Bye, guys.
Love hanging.