The Sevan Podcast - #615 - Live Call In Show

Episode Date: October 2, 2022

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Let's go seize the night. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash yamex. Benefits vary by card. Other conditions apply. Could coffee smell like berries? Bam, we're live. Yeah, I think that's kind of how Gabe labels the packages.

He puts like three little descriptor like adjectives and usually there's like some sort of barrier in it. Yeah. This coffee smells like berries. Maybe they've all smelled like berries and I just didn't realize it. I do. Elise Carredao. Jeremy.

Jeremy Eat World. Adam. Brandon Waddle. Eric Weiss. I did that on purpose, Brandon. Yeah, my house is quite old. I just need him to lift and support the floorboards that have started to sink. Nothing crazy, but going to cost me a leg, it sounds like.

Oh, Darian can't make the show. We don't even have a ufc show scratch this fucking idea justin nunley i'm tied up with an unexpected business call and we'll be a couple minutes late business call you fucking make tiktoks for a living motherfucker he's probably planning out his next now and nascar race yeah he's being invited to one is that what you said yeah yeah uh 8 a.m stayed awake all podcast last night and all i got was hiller's cringe role playing what about what about um one of the ex-employees uh calling in and just fucking just destroying crossfit and and destroying me he texts me later and he's like you know i didn't mean that i know you're the hardest worker i just said blah blah shut it i'll call him today michael mccoy can't take it back

now hey did you did you hear any of that no you were asleep no yeah i had a long fucking 24 hours i it was it was actually really cool really it was an old employee it was an old employee that used to work for me i guess his he's parted ways with crossfit and uh he just called in just just fucking i don't know if he was drunk or what um adam hartman i had a dream about seven last night we had some dinner to go to and he came to my house to help me pick out an outfit. Weird. I don't know.

He probably needed to help get an outfit together. Awesome. I like – no, no, that wasn't a fake Aussie accent, Jeff. I mean Colin. Not fake at all. Not fake at all. not fake at all um mccoy was actually a uh he was on some reality show in australia and it was like quite controversial i think i think like he kissed a boy on there or something the show last night was fun though

hey the author of this book is coming on the show. Mike Hunt smells like fish. You actually bought it? Paper copy? I buy all the books of the authors that come on. If you wrote a book, I'd buy it too. That guy had typical minion syndrome. Think the boss doesn't do anything because he has no clue. The thing is, is that guy does know.

That guy was on my behind-the-scenes team a couple times. But you're right, yeah. And the thing is, I told my – I mentioned to my wife that he called and he said that. And she goes, dude, how do so many people fucking know your work if you didn't do any work well that's a good point too i i have if anything i'm a workaholic whatever that means i don't really compartmentalize my life between work and not work so maybe that's why he thought that my shit looked like i don't work yeah this dude's coming on the podcast this this guy's written over a hundred books like this it's probably pretty easy right because they're like five pages long

i guess i can't wait for him to come on did you see the um the links i sent you yeah i did can you can you um click that one that says mike hunt we can listen to uh is that true is that a true like minion syndrome can i look that up on wiki is that like a is that a syndrome i think it's like napoleon syndrome technically i thought napoleon syndrome was just like dudes who are short like trying to overcompensate like like like they have a big dog and a big truck and a big stereo like I used to have. She just made that up. Wow.

Wow. That's good shit, Heidi. Words matter, Heidi. Damn it. Yeah, and she's just added something to the fucking American vernacular. Mike Hunt. This guy, the author, Brad Gose. Gose? Goose?

Goose? Mike Goose. Brad Goose. hunt this guy uh the author brad gose gase goose ghost mike ghost brad ghost he's coming on the show in a couple days a couple weeks a week okay uh action it smells like fish my cunt gets so hairy sometimes my cunt bleeds it can be kind of scary my cunt loves to squirt and gets wet easily. My cunt once got crabs and scratched endlessly. My cunt gets ingrown hairs. My cunt collects toys. My cunt has a piercing and gets pounded by the boys. Sometimes my cunt farts. With great force and power, my cunt is the freshest. Right after a shower, Mike Hunt Smells Like Fish is available on Amazon. Mike Hunt. Hey, that's in the top 50 of Amazon books right now. That guy, Homeboy, is killing it. His voice is so perfect for that. I don't get jealous, but I think there's something like jealousy brewing in me when I see that guy.

Why? I never wanted to be anyone. Like the last time I wanted to be someone, I wanted to be Fonzie from Happy Days. Hey. Hey. I just can't believe how cool that is that he did that. It's like, it's like a slam dunk.

It's so any, the way he reads it, the, the, the, the pictures, everything. Um, the,

of those 108 comments about me on, in that Reddit thread that just fucking speaking of ass pound, ass pound me. I think 50 of them were like, Hey, he has such Juva. He's so juvenile. And was like yeah i am so juvenile someone asked me last night what i think the best part about those books is that he'll go on stage and like read them to people

yeah oh you're familiar with his work yeah you're familiar with his work yeah well i just like scrolled through his page when i saw that we got him on i was like what the fuck it was awesome he um uh look at the one where it says reported on tiktok he was this is kind of cool he was reported on tiktok and um uh excuse me. He was reported on TikTok and it looks like he won. We reviewed your appeal and removed the community guidelines by violation. We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused.

Thank you for being part of the TikTok community. Haters tried to report Mike Hunt. So good. You love being juvenile. I don't know. Yeah. I mean, I love myself. I'm having a'm having fucking blast with life the thing is someone asked me yesterday at my kids tennis game what's your podcast about and i said i'm the deepest crass man on the internet or maybe i said planet earth i can't help i can find i see god in the follicle of a pubic hair. I can't help that.

It's not, it's some people can look up to the heavens and see clouds talking to them. I like, I, I, mine is in poop and pee and it's just, it sucks. I never know how to explain it to people when they ask like what this show is about. Like fucking everything. They're like, what do you mean? I'm like everything talk about cock and balls and we'll talk about like the meaning of life i guess yes yes well is there a difference hey did you see the that klopman guy is awesome the balance guy yeah i was scrolling through his stuff. It's very interesting. I, so I sent, um, I sent, uh,

I put him in contact with Travis Bajent cause you know, his, his son Tyson Bajent, uh, is, you know, number one quarterback in a division two football, maybe in the history of football, he won the Harlan award. He was a guest on this show and his other son, Ezra Bajent, you know, I know that there's a hundred kids out there who are the best quarterbacks in the nation right now in high school but he's one of them it's crazy what travis has done with those boys i said it i'm giving the credit to the dad hillar wouldn't like it hillar didn't want ben bergeron getting any credit i give all the credit

to ben bergeron and the dads anyway uh and the moms the parents um but so i put him in contact with him and then i also put him in contact with um oh i shouldn't say that but i'm putting him in contact with a couple other people too this guy claims caleb that i mean he this guy claims that when he watched uh matt fraser take like 24th or 32nd whatever matt took in the running event at the crossfit games that one year and then the next year when he took first or second or whatever he claims he's like hey i don't have any proof of this but i guarantee you he worked on his balance like you don't get bed that much better just by run by practicing your running he claims that there was some sort of balance training in there

really yeah that's pretty cool. He thinks it makes that much of a difference? Dude, the stories he has and the books. Where is the book? The book's here. This book. The stories in this book are great. Hey, but you know what else is weird about balance?

You can get that block of his. I have that block, that balance block, and you can see improvements like in an hour so that's the weird thing yeah yeah you can stand on that thing and struggle to stand on it and then get on it 15 minutes later and it's a little bit easier and get on like 15 minutes later it's a little bit easier and then sleep and then the next day you get on it and it's it's like way way easier i suppose it's kind of similar to what you were doing with your um i can't remember which kid it was but you said that they were doing the they were just getting on a skateboard 10 minutes a day yeah yeah obvi yeah yes yes wow i didn't think of that yes yeah like if it was

raining outside i would just put them on be like stand on the skateboard for 10 minutes in the garage and i'd give them a fucking credit yeah you wrote it today huh that's awesome um transgender women man man is now competing and winning brian's beloved pro women's disc golf oh no shit they got that it's a wow so it's a dude who's entered the wouldn't't it be cool if for golf they just mixed women and men together? I don't. Disc golf. Yeah. Would you think it would make a difference?

I mean I don't know. I don't know very much about golf or disc golf or anything. Couldn't they just be together? I mean theoretically you could think that maybe uh natalie ryan is the first trans athlete oh have you seen this this story going around about the the one of your people yes i have been reading about you want me to pull that up quick and then let's talk about this first hold on let's talk about brian shit first and then we'll go to that um uh natalie ryan is the first man to participate as a woman you have you can't use the word trans you have to like

it's like um you know we use the word sister like like i have a sister and i use that word uh to so that people know that like hey that that girl came out of my mom's vagina too like that's our relationship same same dad um same mom like the whole they had sex and they had me and my sister but trans for some reason you i need to know i can't just read that word natalie ryan is the first man to participate as a in a woman's who like it doesn't make it i feel like i'm lying if i just say trans there's something not right about it. The first trans pro disc golf elite series winner outlasted the tour's top two for her second tour win. Oh, so it's not even a – wow, isn't that funny? They call it the first trans, and then they switch the pronoun later to her.

Why don't they just keep calling it a tranny? a tranny the first trans pro disc golf elite series winner outlasted the top the tour's top two for the tranny's second tour win in 2022 like they should just call it a tranny you can't call it a he or her i i we gotta meet us in the middle somewhere we i can't just accept that it's a her because it's not a her it to us. It's hilarious to me like what people will like – like how specific people will get just to give somebody an accolade. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, oh, look. It's the first bald guy ever to win the PGA Tour. Yeah, it's the first bald Mexican guy in the military who has ever won the PGA Tour on the fourth day of September. It does – the thing is, is I don't like women – I don't like men in women's sports.

And I think it's dishonest and just ingenuous. And then when the first attack is that you're transphobic, they even – they prove my point even more so. That's not even like – what does that have to do with transphobic? I'm not scared of trans i've told you a million times i will bathe in a pool naked with a hundred trannies i let them touch my genitalia i don't care i have no fears like that i have no but but you can't do that you cannot do that we don't we don't operate like that. We're different. I heard a great story the other day. A man and a woman were arguing, and you were getting, um, mugged,

if someone mugged you and your husband, would you want your husband to stand up for you? And she's like, yeah. And he's like, well, there's your general. Yeah. You fuck nut. It's like, they want everything to be like catered to them. And this whole thing, I can't do this whole, this whole thing i can't do this this whole thing about um not realizing that the greatest thing a woman can do is is to uh birth a child is fucking nuts too i'm sorry the greatest thing my wife ever did is birth my three sons i don't and the greatest thing my mom ever did was

give birth to me and my sister and i've never done anything i don don't know. And the greatest thing I did was let one fly in my wife. I mean, there's no really comparison. She birded them and fed them from her body like like I got nothing. I asked my wife, I asked my wife what that was about. I go, why? What's the deal with women? Why are they going on? And they said that they don't. She said women don't want to lose their idea she thinks that it's that women don't want to lose their identity in being just moms sorry that's going to happen to all of us we all lose our identity in something and then it breaks our heart when it's gone get fucking over it there's something else. Like there's always something else to do. Like if you're going to be a mom, you're going to be a mom until like,

I mean, till the kid dies, till it flies the coop till you have another kid till. Yes. And there's always something else you can do while you're doing other things. Like you're not just, this is all you have.

Dear women, dear women, dear women. Dear women. Oh, man, this one's going to be crazy. Dear women. If you don't have kids, you will never experience the greatest gift that life has presented to you. If you do not have kids, you will never see your greatest gift. If you do not have kids and be a loving mom, you will never express yourself as it's in your fullest. There's these trees, they're called mul mulberry trees and most of them don't give

mulberries because they weren't grafted to give mulberries and they are a complete fucking waste because there's hardly a fruit better on the planet than a sweet giant mulberry they are insane you can't even believe they're real you can feel the sugar crunching in your teeth what are they they just don't bloom and mulberries anymore i don't i don't know i don't know why i don't know i don't know what happened i don't know enough about trees and genetics and and whatever but there's shit loads of mulberry trees that don't get fruit you can graft them though you can just take a mulberry tree that gives fruit and peel off some skin and tape it to the side of one that you know that doesn't

and all those branches that come out of there will start giving fruit but man kids are fucking amazing and and and my wife is completely uh uh uh completely embraced the mom like completely embraced the mom role and dude i'm telling you it's like it's it's queen shit it's powerful shit everyone everyone thinks like everywhere my wife goes everyone's like holy fuck that's a bad bitch and my wife's just a nice gentle little soul like she's not even like she doesn't she doesn't posture like me at all she's cool but i would argue they probably they probably mama shit's real well i would argue they probably set up just as much of an example as the dad does. Who?

Like the mom. Like the mom sets an example for the kids just as much as the dad. Oh, even more. Yeah, even more. It's like if the mom just gives up and like, oh, well, I'm just a mom now. It's like you're giving away so many opportunities for yourself to show your kids what's possible yeah you're not just a mom right you're a fucking mom capital m yeah and hey dude everyone knows it like the moms that are like the moms like you see those moms at the beach they're like mamas

and like they're all beautiful and cool and chill but they're also fucking ferocious everyone everyone sees those moms putting the wetsuits on the kids swimming out there with them they get the big old butts the smile the fucking hair that's wild i'm not yeah they know who they are um how about this uh uh oh yeah yeah can we see the um the tranny in the army? So what happened? This thing was like selling secrets to the Russians? Yeah, so from what I understand, they – so her, he, they, whatever the fuck you want to call them, previously tried to join the Russian military like a while back and the Russian military was like, no, you don't have any combat experience. So we don't want you.

So what ended up happening is they joined the American military and, uh, I think they're, they're, they're a doctor of some sort, I think. And they, uh, had a clearance of sorts and they were able to access like patient records of everybody, essentially. And they just started like picking notes out of people's patient records, probably just fucking taking screenshots of them or whatever and sending them off to Russians. Like – well, technically what they thought was a Russian, but actually what ended up happening is the – some FBI agent posed as a Russian spy, and they sent them – sent the pictures to them, and that's how they caught him. if you're born, the greatest gift you can give yourself as fast as you can in life is to accept yourself.

Like that, like some people, I'd say most people never do that. You're going to be with one person your entire life, one person your entire life, and you better love them. And if you don't love them, you're fucked. So this person, if you're born a dude and you want to be a girl you're born a girl that wants to be a dude and you think you're going to fix that on the outside

you you are not going to you are going to be unhappy your whole life that's called mental illness there's no there's nothing i've ever fixed on the outside. There's nothing I've ever done out here that made me, that, that, that scratched the itch so deep that it went away. Whatever issue I had went away. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. You don't, you could, Sevan, some men don't want kids as well. I think this generation is too busy taking, yeah, maybe. Some women don't, I'm not talking about whether you want kids or not totally different distinction i'm telling you that if you don't have kids you will never get to experience your greatest gift as a human being and if you're a woman it will be it will be doubly you you'll never you will never you'll be a fruitless tree i just i'm not saying it like

as my opinion i'm saying it as as as a fact like that is your one of the things that you do is take a shit if you don't take a shit after like for the i hear there's people who don't take shit like for days it's probably not a good metaphor i couldn't imagine but um uh it's probably yesterday isn't that great when you're about to shit your pants and you make it to the toilet god those are fucking great and then you just like what's even better is you're just like cleaned out after that yeah yeah oh my god can you remember that like running home from school just being like oh this is so you've already squeezed it back in like five times your stomach's hurting oh yeah you just got like the wrong guts fuck yeah i don't know if it's like this for girls but there's this phenomenon that happens with boys it happens to me i'm gonna just claim it

happens to all boys you you have to take a pee so bad and you get to a toilet and if you're not really you have to as you lift the toilet seat up your penis thinks it's go time it's like pavlovian as soon as you get into a bathroom yeah yeah so you have to like concentrate be like hey dude we're there's still a few seconds before you can fucking turn and i can remember being a little kid lifting the toilet and i just started peeing in my pants i'm like dude are you fucking kidding like i have to have a talk with my penis are we not on the same page like i got you here i got you bitch yeah smack you. Smack you around. Yeah.

It's just that if you don't have kids, Melissa, you're you're you're you're just a tree that didn't give fruit. And it's like you missed out on this enormous opportunity in life. Yeah, I'm going to have to use I was going to say maybe missed isn't the right word. Yeah, but you missed it. The thing is, is because of this, it changes you. – I don't know what level it changed me on, but you picked a word, biologically, emotionally, intellectually. Everything got better. It's like I became a higher being. Now, of course, if you don't embrace that change and you argue with reality, that's where all problems occur. You know what I mean? change and you argue with reality that's where all problems occur you know what i mean like you your window's broken in your house and you're pissed because you're arguing with reality

because you don't want to accept it i get it can't really do that with kids you have to be i would argue there's like a level of selflessness that you probably haven't even probably haven't even or won't reach if you don't have kids. I don't have kids. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had no idea. You would just be completely, you're just selfish for, like, that's just, maybe that's just who you are, I guess. Dude, I have these, I have these experiences. If you think about how selfless you have to be, you'll never have kids. But there's these things that just, like, you know, like, I'm in the backyard, I don't know, like, with the leaf blower. And I hear a kid go yell from the bathroom, I'm don't know like with the leaf blower and i hear

a kid go yell from the bathroom i'm done and i put the leaf blower down and i run in there and wipe his butt and i'm like happy to do it and i'm like i'm like thinking to myself i don't even recognize me the previous me before kids i'd be like fuck you i'm using the leaf blower don't talk to me like i'm willing to die on this hill but now it's like oh put the leaf blower down and wipe a butt it's like i just got reprogrammed yeah i thought it was gonna be like that when i got a puppy but i was like i think because it's like it's not my yes i guess i was just like shut up stop barking and i'll feed you it whenever you're supposed to get fed you know it was like it was i mean i love the dog like she's she does everything that i ask her to do i've trained her to do everything she knows all that

stuff but like i don't think i would love her as much as i would love my own child right but when your dog has to go pee in the middle of the night and it's a new dog you don't do you mind getting i mean it sucks but do you mind oh no i'm like so annoyed at that point. Oh. If it's like 2 a.m., I'm like fucking goddammit. I just want to sleep. I, I, I'm, the first, I'm, if my kids wake up in the middle of the night, I'm so happy to get up and deal with it. Yeah, I imagine that I would feel do the same way if it was like, if it was my actual flesh and blood child, but. Yeah. I mean, it's hard

sometimes i mean sometimes just you're physically just worn yeah but if you have both parents there you and you have good communication you just tap it's like literally wwe like i will come home with the boys i would just see my wife like standing there like in the kitchen living room in the house or on the computer whatever i'll walk by i'm like i need 20 minutes she's like got it and i just fucking go lay down yeah we kind of kill someone kind of do that with the dog for a while who's it's up uh calm them on happy way shut up christine so why do they let people in why is it why do they let people into the u.S. military who have such strong mental health issues? Like how are you supposed to – isn't there like some sort of – isn't there some sort of rule like you don't know – like you don't even know what sex you are? Dude, I have no fucking idea.

This is so insane to me. If you are getting, if you have a security clearance, you have to have like a level of mental stability to maintain it. If you have any sort of contact with any sort of like sensitive information, you can, you cannot be mentally unstable, like from a clinical sense. Right. So like, if I'm taking any, that's a rule, you're not just saying that your opinion, that's a rule. No shit. Like that's no any that's a rule you're not just saying that your opinion that's a rule no shit like that's no that's a no shit rule so like if you are taking any sort

of antidepressants and anxiety medications like anything like that for any period of time like you're cut off of those those pathways of information for like x amount of time and if you think about it, seems fair, right? Exactly. Cause you're, you're essentially mentally unstable. You can't have access to that stuff. You're on drugs.

You're on drugs. Literally you're on drugs. Yeah. So now you're saying that there is a, somebody, there's a transgender individual who's almost a hundred percent. I almost guarantee is on some sort of antidepressant, anti-anxiety medication or like,

and also probably some hormone blockers. So like fucking who knows what, just a whole gambit of medications. And that person is still having still allowed access to somebody else's medical record who is like a higher level. Who knows that? Well, probably everybody's medical record at this point,

because that person's a doctor. So they're're a provider so they just have access to everybody's record so it is absolutely insane to me that they allowed that person to continue to have access to any of that stuff like you can like in what's even crazier i highly even doubt that those people are under her as like like she's their their provider right right right she had access to shit that yeah yeah yeah i hey dude i was at i was at jujitsu one time and a doctor uh one of the other parents who's a physician um said my kid got hurt uh they had their eyeball scratched in jujitsu and one of the other parents walks up to me and goes hey um i prescribed you some blah blah blah some cream for your kid's eye i was like oh that's really

nice of you and i was looking through your kid's file and it doesn't look like they've ever been to the hospital yeah so i'm like what the fuck to be fair sometimes those instances are like necessary i guess because then you like sometimes you have to look at the record to determine if they have any like pre-existing conditions to prescribe some medications. So like you could have or you just to see if there's any medications that they're taking that they can't take with whatever they're taking, that kind of thing. But usually that's like a quick like quick glance at like a last encounter or something. Have you been deployed with any trannies? No, but I do know of deployed – I do know of trannies who have been deployed. And they have to send their medication with them?

Yeah. What a fucking – that seems like – that seems – Dude, it's fucking insane to me. Look at – Justin's like, oh, fuck, I'm going to get discharged today. What the fuck kind of that room is the smallest room in the world with three doors. The fuck is going on with that room? I'm upstairs. Three doors. That room does not need three doors that room needs three doors

like you need three dicks i mean i can figure out something to do with them i have a business meeting no i have an unexpected business meeting it was it was super unexpected but it was it it's gonna be uh it's not it's not for me to make money, it's for a nonprofit. Whoop-dee-doo. Whoop-dee-doo. Operation Light Shine. Operation Raining. Do they just come up with two adjectives and put operation in front of it

and that's how you get it? That's exactly how you get it. It's like an anti-sex trafficking non-profit i'm gonna be honest of course it is i fucking knew it there's so many of those hey uh justin uh we were talking about how it'll be there's shit like the first mexican ever to be a immigrant mexican to be a congressman or the first uh the first guy to ever be on the moon who has two penises and now they got this article it's like first uh first double agent tranny like have you seen this story going around no oh here pull it up for justin they're one people, Justin, Mr. Nunley, was giving the Russians shit.

This guy, this dude. Major Jamie Lee Henry, during an August 17th meeting in Baltimore hotel room, told the undercover FBI agent he was motivated by patriotism towards Russia. This motherfucker tried to go to the Russian jail. He doesn't even know what country he's rooting for. Why do they keep saying it's a she? It's not a she. I have no idea.

Are you friends with this dude? Are you friends with this guy, Justin? Mike Hunt. Mike. Michael Hunt. idea are you friends with this dude are you friends with this guy justin mike hunt mike michael cut hey will you play that um uh mike hunt video again like hey justin why don't you open up that um that black rifle uh coffee and get your heartbeat going i've already had one this morning oh okay here we go this is dedicated to you just reading my cunt gets so hairy sometimes my cunt bleeds it can be kind of scary and gets wet easily my cunt once got crabs and scratched endlessly my cunt gets ingrown hairs Oh my god. Dude, he's got a hundred books, Justin.

That is wild. He's great, right? Why didn't I think of that? Oh, that's exactly what I said. Dude, I'm telling you, anytime a comedian comes up with like a joke or something that's like just so simple

or something like that, I'm like, why in the hell did I not think of this? Okay, I've been saving this one for you. I think this is Justin Nunley's neighbor. I'm glad Darian's not here because he does the show on a phone and he can't see shit. Will you play bottle guy? I think both of those are the bottle guy maybe.

Play the top bottle guy first, the one above the bottle guy. This is so good. Justin, what's up with you? You okay? Yeah. It's, it's just been a morning.

Okay. Your wife being nice to you. She's, she's never nice to me. I'm sorry. It's just always something. Okay. Your kids are healthy.

Oh yeah. We're good. Okay. Your penis isn't burning. Well, I mean, that's a given. All right. Two, I'm two out of three. Okay. Your penis isn't burning? Well, I mean, that's a given. All right.

I'm two out of three. Okay. Do you know this guy, Uncle Sink? No, I've never seen him. All right. Let's go. I'm back, bitches. Look at this.

Big boy. Let's go. Oh, he licks the side of the can. Yes, I've seen him. He licks the side. Like I. Yes, I've seen him. He licks the side. Like I was talking about this the other day. Let's go. It's so unnecessary.

Why do you lick the side of the can? Do you know how many? This is the stupidest shit ever. Hold on. Listen to me. You got to listen to me. Do you know how many mice have probably pissed on the side of that while it was sitting in a warehouse and you're sitting there just licking it? When I used to work in – when I was like 16 years old, I worked in this place called Drug Barn.

It was like before Costco was popular. It was like a mini Costco without a membership, and we'd have just pallets of fucking cans back there of soda. Costco without a membership and we'd have just pallets of fucking cans back there of soda. And the rumor was, is that when these come from Mexico, the Mexicans piss all over the top of them just to punish us Americans. I like the way you didn't blame Mexicans though. You said it was rats. That was really cool of you. Yeah. I'm telling you, man, like I've, I've been in these warehouses, like they're this, these products are not stored that anytime I get like a, like a Coke or, a Coke or something from the convenience store, I have to- You've never gotten a Coke. How dare you?

I have to wash the top off before I'll drink it. The shit's nasty. Do you have a window of time that Mike Hunt has to be washed before you'll go down at the Y? No. No. No. Not at all. I like it raw. Yeah, you like it aged, raw, whatever.

Whatever it's been through, you're willing to experiment. Right. You're a good dude. What's the one below the bottle guy? It's another Brad Gose. Oh, okay. Let's watch that, too. I think we got a better response out of Justin with that guy.

With the Mike, Mike, Mike Hunt guy. I'm going to show you some of my newest books and you get to guess which two I'm not allowed to read on TikTok anymore. Uncle Bob can't wait to show me his knob. Gluck, gluck 9,000. Our horse. My racist dog. Sweatshop kids make everything you own. Mike Hunt smells like fish.

What the fuck? Perverted goat. I write books for children. Many of them have been banned by TikTok. Hey. Hey, my racist dog is so funny. Did I put a link to that? Please say I put a link to it. No, I'll try to find it, though.

Oh, it's so good. Oh, it's so good. Hey, you ever seen Kamala Harris' titties, Justin? No. You want to see them? I found them No, I'd rather not I'm gonna show you anyway Thanks You're welcome

This is, uh This, this is, uh I can't even believe this, actually This is, it's kinda cool Hey, do you know what a porn star's favorite gun is? Um, no, what? Glock Glock Glock this is it's kind of cool hey do you know what a porn star's favorite gun is um no what glock glock glock did you just make that up no i've heard it before she dated some prominent men including in 2000 look at there she is on the right there see her without montale yeah with montale famous one and had to introduce her to the paparazzi Without Montel. Yeah, with Montel.

Crazy. There you go. Not sexist, people. Not sexist. If you think it's sexist, you're a misogynist. I went over this yesterday. Not sexist. It's okay this yesterday. Not sexist. It's okay to appreciate people's body parts.

There's nothing wrong with it. We're all born with bodies. Don't be a Puritan. I know you appreciate my body parts on the rig. I do. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. I almost closed my window. Okay. Is this... Oh, yeah, yeah. This is so good, Justin. God, this is so good. Here we go. Brad Ghost. My little dog, yeah. This is so good, Justin. God, this is so good. Here we go.

Brad goes. My little dog, Jack. He only likes whites. And that is a fact. When we go outside, he barks at the blacks. What the dog do? He barks at the browns and the Indians, too. He barks at the mailman.

I think he's a Jew. The answer is simple. It's in your dog's ear jack here's your heart he knows that you fear asian peeps brown peeps and black people too your dog isn't racist the problem is you my racist dog is available on amazon i love the subtitle, too. He only trusts whites. My God. That dude don't give a shit about getting canceled, does he? That's crazy.

He got canceled on TikTok and then he appealed it and they gave it back to him. Really? Yeah, yeah. Show Justin that. That'll give Justin hope. Show Justin that. Yeah, yeah. Show Justin will really like that. My cunt smells like fish. fish no not that uh ufc shows out the door i i saw pizza maker that i want to ask you about justin it looks

like some southern shit i can't wait to show you this pizza maker uh this is from brad ghost's uh tiktok account we reviewed your appeal and remove the community guideline violation. We apologize for any inconveniences may have caused. Thank you for being part of the tick tock community. Is that Mike? Mike hunt smells like fish. Yeah. Yeah.

That's awesome. Yeah. So, uh, I got a note today when I went on my instagram saying that i had to re-enter it because my shit had been compromised suspicious activity really yeah you've got two-factor authentication turned on i guess do i i don't know they sent me a text they sent me a text on fuck it i you know what i immediately do i close the app where did you stop yes did you get the notification on instagram or yes through the app okay yeah the the email you already know that shit's wild hey and they're getting pretty good at it too disregard any phone calls or any emails that's what i do

my wife's like really i go yeah if they really like i just like hey dude i had someone fucking call me and say I can't remember where they said they were from some government agency and that there was a lawsuit against me. And then I, and I need, and they started asking me all these questions and, and they told me I had missed my first court date and I fucking called the fucking local courthouse. And they're like, nah, dude, it's, those are people fishing. I'm like, my God. And since then I just hang up on everybody. Yeah. It's, it just hang up on everybody. Yeah, it's fucking wild, man.

Like, these scammers are out of control. Can you show Justin the pizza maker? This pizza maker is hardcore. I've never even seen it. This looks like some Southern shit. I bet you Justin probably has one of these in every room. I've never even seen one. Dude, I shit I bet you Justin probably has one of these in every room but I've never even seen one dude I will do some redneck shit to make things happen I am resourceful

as hell you may have to go like 30 seconds into this video to see it too I don't know if we have to I don't know if you can do that gentlemen it's primetime 99 Alex signed for a very special one bite pizza review of the one, the only, Dave Portnoy special freaking Barstool Pizza Alert.

I can't forward it. Let me tell you something, guys. Dave Portnoy doesn't like me because I'm on the grind all the time, and I call him out because, listen, they got a bunch of degenerate content, but this guy, he's a pizza man. Well, let's see how his pizza tastes, all right? Let's see. Everybody knows the rules.

One bite of pizza with multiple sexual assault allegations. Okay, one bite. We're about to put this in the pizza press for Pizza Maker. We're going to see how this bitch is. Can you mute this a second? Look at this. Oh, can you just mute it and let it play? Oh, I've seen these pizza things before.

So it heats up the room and cooks your pizza at the same time? It's like infrared. So it's like, ain't it? I think that's what it is. We had one of those in college. It's like cooking with infrared light. And it just spins and cooks it. Yeah, do you approve of that?

Hell yeah. I mean, I prefer an air fryer but for pizza for everything dude air fryers works that like if you if you want shit to taste good and crispy air fryer i don't even understand your air fryer i don't either but i like it right right like women hell yeah dude i'm telling you women stop um stop even trying to understand that look at these uh the prime how many followers does alex stein have now who's alex stein this dude's just blowing up dude this is the guy 180 000 he was on the um capital steps telling aoc she that she was her his uh favorite big booty latina oh my god yeah and he recently just destroyed fucking dan crenshaw

just dan crenshaw is either that's good they're coming with uh marjorie taylor green he gives zero fucks um oh dude caleb presley is going after the liver king somebody just commented that i'm telling you it's uh that's pretty good it looks like the liver king's down though he's embraced it right he's leaning into it i mean you kind of have to the the jizz king but when he asked me if he wishes he was the jizz king yeah I mean, you kind of have to. The Jizz King? When he asked him if he wishes he was the Jizz King? Yeah. Hey, have you seen...

I've started seeing this. There is a... There's like a jewelry company now that is making jewelry with semen. It's called Jizz Jewelry. Why? Fuck if I know. Jizz jewelry. It's the wildest shit I've ever seen.

It's, they drop. Is that what I'm hearing, like, your ashes is in your tattoo ink? People are doing that. I, I,

uh, liver king videos are just sad, clearly forced. I don't know. I, I, I don't think they're sad at all they do jewelry with breast milk what are like what whatever happened to just sapphires and diamonds look at my diamonds now my jizz now look at look at my cum look at this shit dried it outried it out and hardened it up. What is that? The whole beast?

What is this? That's a liver king, butter vanilla liver king protein powder. Do you like it? I fucking love it. 170 pounds of man right here. Yeah, that liver king, that dude's wild. There's no way he's all natural though, right? I don't know.

People think I'm a jackass. I believe them. I believe them. 100%. I believe them. That's a big old boy. That is a big old man. But he's little.

He's little, Justin. He comes under your chin. Like if me and you were, if me and liver king weren't- Ain't no He comes under your chin. If me and the liver king weren't on either side of you... There ain't no dude coming under my chin. If me and the liver king weren't on either side of you, you'd look like a fucking giant.

All 5'11 of you. You'd be like, hi boys, how are you? How tall are you, Savan? 5'5". Are you fucking with me? No. That still don't tell me anything. Like, it's still a camera.

Look, here's the book. Oh, here. I'll stand next to an iPhone. I'll stand next... Look, here's me next to an iPhone. iPhone for size. See? iPhone's about like eight inches.

He's like ten of them. You see it? He's more like four of them uh how about this this how about this uh um this uh maya flores can you play mexicans are conservative that justin's not gonna like this one not not that he's not gonna like it she's gonna it's it's not his cup of tea but it's good to introduce him to new cultural things. This lady is the first – just like we looked at the first tranny ever to be busted for selling shit to the Russians. This is the first Mexican-born – she was a fucking field worker. This is a field worker who is now in Congress, and I just love her fucking message. I want to watch Justin's face as she plays this.

her fucking message. I want to watch Justin's face as she plays this. All of a sudden, an immigrant, a woman, a mother, Border Patrol wife, becomes the first Mexican-born Congresswoman ever elected in Congress. And now,

she's dangerous. Hipócritas. I thought y'all were for women. I thought y'all were for women i thought y'all were for immigrants what's going on am i the only immigrant that they're calling dangerous oh wait a minute we are dangerous if we're conservative we are dangerous if we stand for our values values that were instilled in us. Did you not know that in Mexico we are raised with strong conservative values? If you didn't know that, guess what? We're all conservative. Somos conservadores.

Somos gente de Dios. Familia y mucho trabajo. Say it with me, Justin. Somos conservadores. A woman, a mother, a perpetual wife becomes the first Mexican-born congresswoman

ever elected. I just love it. Surprise! We're conservative! Surprise! I don't know if I believe it. I don't know if i believe it i don't know if i believe it i tell you the the whole just politics in general so fucked up whether you're right or left everybody's just in a goddamn mess i stay away from it everybody everybody's fucking crazy. Fair. Fair. We looked at the pizza maker.

We looked at Mike Hunt. We looked at the bottle guy. Oh, this is actually the first one that's kind of apropos appropriate for – you're in Florida, right? Yeah. Yeah, this is going to be useful for you. Okay. Condom on Mike. You must have seen this already, Justin. How for you okay uh condom on mic you must have seen this already justin how are you doing is the storm near you is the storm near you man we didn't even get any weather off of it yo the condom microphone yeah have you seen this yeah yeah this is they're

there's some florida ingenuity yes a lot of people are asking what is on my microphone it is what you think it is it's a condom it helps protect the gear we can't get these mics wet there's a lot of wind a lot of rain so we got to do what we got to do and that is put a condom on the microphone you know i'm all for i am all for adapting and overcoming but the first thing that i thought when i when i saw that condom that magnum wrapped around the shaft of the microphone i said could they put it in your mouth no could they not have used saran wrap oh like nobody nobody in that crew said you know what saran wrap would probably be a little bit better than a condom. But how convenient is it, though? You just spread it over the top and roll it down? I mean, yeah.

I mean, it works. You're just... Because if you use the saran wrap, it gets... You know she can smell that, too. Just like... Oh, it's just latex and spermicide. Yeah. And lubrication.

Do they make magnums without lube? Do they make any condoms without lube? I think I've seen condoms without lube, which just seems fucking ridiculous. It's like you could buy a car without air conditioning, but why the fuck would you? Good point. It's a very good point. Hey, I like the first comment, too, in that post. Finally, the first honest thing coming out of a news station.

It's like yeah hey you know when they say that too that they say condoms are only 98 effective you know that two percent is user error there's no like i don't know man i've had them ripped before maybe maybe i was just going too hard in the paint, but, uh, I've, I've had them bust open before. Serious. Yeah. I read that. We have the instructions for them, like in our,

in this little like pamphlet when we hand them out to people, cause you know, for text, text. And if you read it, like you're supposed to like remove all the air from it as you're applying it. So if you don't remove the air from it, then it burst yeah i never have even i never i've just i just roll it on in the dark can't even see what i'm doing sometimes i roll it i start to roll it on

backwards on accident i know there ain't enough room left in those extra smalls for me ain't no room for air but i've never had one break hey Hey, if it's 98% effective, that means every hundred times you have sex, there's two loads that get passed. Yeah. Two runners that get passed. Or is it like the weather? Like a 30% chance of rain means that 30% of the viewing area is going to get, has a 100% chance of rain. So is it like that? Like 2% of the time, 100% of the rain. So is it like that?

Like 2% of the time, 100% of the girls are getting load in them. 2% of the time, 100% of the time. Wow. I get it. I hear what you're saying. My head hurts trying to figure that out. It's like 2% of the time, you know, only 2% of the time 100 of the load goes in yeah the other okay yeah i don't know i don't even know what i'm talking about right now no but i hear you i hear you i like it that's that's that's yeah i don't i don't think you can make that conclusion you're

right now that i don't even know what 98 effective effective means. It means that no semen gets past the guard or like, I don't even know what it means. Or, or 2% results in a pregnancy or 2% of people get an STD. Like, so what is it? What is the effectiveness? Like what,

how are we measuring condoms effectiveness? Is it, is it us getting the clap or is it chicks getting pregnant? Well, I think it's just the side effect is not getting the clap chase i had everybody sitting here like fuck hey is the clap just all venereal is the clap just all venereal diseases or is that a specific one it's chlamydia right yeah it's a chlamydia why they call it the clap it's gonorrhea actually is it yeah i remember i used to know all the uh the venereal diseases like

like when in the eighth grade or whenever they taught you that shit that one that one puts it do you remember all the shankers they showed you on penises like at eighth ninth tenth grade they do that shit in basic training too they show you pictures of like shankers oh they have them like posted up in the bathrooms too so fucking nasty like i ain't trying to see oh so while you look down at your dick you can be like nope don't got that oh literally like at the urinals they just have them all like posted out there like the most the worst versions of those diseases and i'm sorry that's not gonna stop you from having a sex like you get horny enough, you're having sex.

Like, those pictures, it's going to happen anyway. You mean like if you got a big old bulbous red pussy knob on the end of your penis, bloody knob? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's not what I'm, what is wrong with you? What I'm saying is, is, like, what the fuck? The visual on that. No, what I'm saying is, is those pictures are not going to keep you from having unprotected sex after a night out at the club. Oh, right. Yeah.

Well, me, they would. That shit scared the shit out of me. But did it really? Yes, yes. Did it really deter you? Yes, yes. Well, no, it didn't deter me from having sex, but I made sure I always had a condom. I was scared to death.

Always. Always, dude. You never raw dogged it once i mean lion lips are an abomination to the lord listen there was this there's been people that i said there's been people i've said that around that we've all i've said that around girls i'm like i always had unprotected sex and they've looked at me like, no, you haven't. And I'm like, yeah, I have. And they're like, no, you haven't. And they've accused me of not. But I honestly cannot remember.

I cannot remember not having unprotected sex. You're pulling the, I don't recollect. I don't have recollection. I'm just saying, I have a healthy dose of fear. I come from the AIDS generation. I didn't want to get anyone pregnant, and I didn't want to fucking get AIDS. Sounds like a fun speech. Thank you.

I only voted for him eight times. There is another Kamala Harris video where she's at the border with North Korea. Have you guys seen these border? Have you seen any of this? Justin? No. Have you seen the one where she's looking through the binoculars? No. I have to show you. I have to. I didn't send you this one.

I have to show you this one. You just have to see it. Oh, shit. I can't even log into my Instagram for my computer right now. Wow, everything's all fucked up. He locked out. Scammers got him.

Do you want to speak to the other one? The other one, I think. Okay, I got it. Okay, I got it. You have to fucking see this. This is so fucking ridiculous. This looks like a Saturday Night Live skit. I cannot even believe this.

Justin's like, I'm never doing this show again. Here we go. The motherfuckers are backwards. Those are so backwards. Why does it look like I'm looking through a peephole? You know what? Bless her heart. Bless her heart. It ain't got nothing to do with her.

It has nothing to do with her being a liberal. It has nothing to do with her being a liberal. It has nothing to do with her being a Democrat or a woman. There are stupid people. I'm telling you, if stupidity was painful, people would be screaming all over the fucking world. She goes, she says, it's something to actually see this close with your own eyes. It's so close. And the soldier's like, it's 50 meters away,'am that's north korea at the wood line she's like she's like wow it's so close i can't even see it with these holy shit hey um do you remember when trump was in like

puerto rico or somewhere and he was handing out paper towels and he was shooting threes with them did you ever see that yes what was it there's a fucking crowd of fucking people like desperate for help a sea of humanity and trump's in a three-piece suit shooting like shooting paper towel rolls at him like this to the peasants you're just like what the fuck is going on i mean it looks fun oh do you have that oh here it is yeah yeah yeah here we go here we go yeah look at it oh this is so good it looks like he's at the fair dude he's giving it to people in the back row what a good damn caleb you're good pulling that up. Look at...

Oh, man. I've never seen that clip. That is wild. Oh, man. Hey, that right there just goes to prove my last point. I know, I know. I hear you. I hear you.

Trump, you insensitive bastard. Holy cow. Hey, someone in the audience should have gone like this. Hit a three boss. Hit a three. Uh, look at Jeff.

What a douche. Can you, you know, it's so like, just like I said with with kamala right you know hell she's probably never used a damn set of binoculars before she doesn't look like the outdoorsy type okay right dude everything she puts in her face she puts in her mouth huh huh so um with with with people like that, I think there's like with all of them, all of them, I think they're so goddamn disconnected from regular people that they see shit like that. It's like, oh, I'm trying to connect with these people. Let me shoot a basketball at them. Not knowing what this shit looks like from the other side. It's like, oh, thanks for giving me my rations, leader.

Good soul. Thank you for your service. Caleb, I got this one for Nunley. He's going to like this one. This will make up for the politics. He's really going to like this. This is right up his alley. I'm taking this from – I have a private collection of clips justin and i'm i'm

i'm dipping into my private my reserve my specialty shit for you just so you know there we go fornication under consent of the king yeah you used to have to get permission to have children because they had population control so when you wanted to have sex with your wife you literally had to go get permission from the king so and when you got permission from the king they would stamp it right on your papers f-u-c-k which meant fornication under consent of the king that's some interesting history now you know what the f word stands for you think that's true yeah so there's two different variations of it. It's found under consent of the king, which was people found fornicating, right? So they were brought in front of the king.

But do you know about why we call shit, shit? No. So they used to, way back in the day when everything was shipped by ship, right? It was cargo, and they would put the manure underneath the boat, right? And, you know, these old boats would let a little bit of water in. As a little bit of water would come in, it would get the dry manure wet. It would start sending off methane. Deck cans would go under deck with their lantern.

The ship would explode. When they finally figured out what was causing ships to explode, they started palletizing the manure, and they would stamp on it SHIT, which meant ship high in transit. Therefore, shit. Oh, meaning don't put it down at the bottom. Yeah.

Put it at the top. Wow. Yep. How do you know that? I don't fucking, I don't know. You don't know how you know that? I don't fucking, I don't know. You don't know how you know? No. But you believe it?

Yeah. Incredible. That's a crazy story. That is a crazy story. That's better than the fuck one, I think. Yeah. I never heard that one before. I've heard the fuck one before.

Back to sex, Heidiidi don't worry okay fine origin of the word fuck god i just used that for my life call-in show condom on microphone in the storm i already used that dude if you hey go ahead no you go he was talking first no you go i ain't fucking saying nothing are there any reddit threads about you that um that do. Are there any Reddit threads about you that, that you, are there people who talk about you on Reddit? I don't know.

I don't give a fuck. I hear there's people that talk about other people on Reddit. I don't care what people say about me. Like at the end of the day, like people are going to talk shit. You can have the most positive message and people are going to find something to bitch about. I don't even care anymore.

I'm just like, fuck them. Say what you want to say. Jesus Christos. They took that dude and put him on a cross. Yeah, I'm not going to find something to bitch about. I don't even care anymore. I'm just like, fuck them. Like Jesus Christos. They took that dude and put him on a cross. Yeah, I'm not going to go search out negative articles or anything like that. And even if somebody sends me something that's negative about me, I never even watch it because I'm like, it's going to kill my creative vibe. I don't give a fuck.

Fair. Did you used to look at stuff like that? No. No, I'm telling you, my life got 10 times better. I became way more successful when I started saying, I do not care what anybody thinks. People's opinion used to bother me. I used to get wrapped up in that.

I cared what people thought about me. I cared what everybody from back home, like, oh, was that too edgy of a joke? Since we was all raised very conservative, Christian, everything. I don't care. If you had something negative to say about me, I will delete you,

block you, and move on about my life because I don't need you there. Well, I want to say something i want to say something positive about you okay when i think of it i'm going to tell you i like it uh what do we what do we think about uh we play uh uh this clip that i just sent you in the private chat what do you think about tom hanks's son i've never heard of him digging him you didn't see you didn't see he you didn't see uh he's a rapper you don't know this guy no okay here we go if you're a man we have to get fucking jacked we have to get fucking jacked

you know that you want to be fucking jacked you know that you want to be fucking jacked you know you want to walk around with the utmost confidence at all times that's how we're meant to feel we're meant to walk around it with the utmost supreme confidence being comfortable in our skin because we fucking have put in the fucking work being sober is just the tip of the iceberg we have to do more that's it it finishes yeah i thought it repeated oh you like him um i don't know i think i think is i think he has good intention oh i like that that's sweet i like to think that everybody has like good intention like no matter who you are you know unless you're like you're just like fucking hitler or somebody everybody has good intention on things chet hanks you think chet hanks has good intentions yes i'm sure if he's if he's

trying to do inspirational videos he just wants people to be jacked. I don't know the dude. That's the first time I've ever saw anything. He's a rapper too, I think. I wanted to show you some of his rap too, if I can find it. He exploded on the scene. He was on some hip hop show, and they asked him if

he wanted to apologize for shit he had said, and he's like, no, fuck you. I no fuck what does he say nothing nothing that was like nothing oh he's he oh he's a dad i tell you what though you know it's best if you don't address any of it if you don't address anything it goes the fuck away away. If you talk about it, like Joe Rogan a couple months ago, he didn't say shit. He kept his mouth shut, kept his head down, kept working. Didn't say a fucking thing. He apologized like a pussy.

Did he? I didn't see that. Yeah, he did. Did not see it. Do you think apologizing admits that you did something wrong? It depends on the context. I mean, if you did do something wrong, you should apologize for it. If I, if I do something wrong, we get somebody or, you know, I get wrapped up in my emotion and say something I shouldn't have said.

The moment that I realized that I fucked up, I go in, I apologize to that person immediately. I don't care if it's two seconds later or it's a week later. The moment I realized I was in the wrong guy, go apologize. Right. But let's say someone says to me, um, Hey, you have a, you have a big nose and that hurts my feelings. And, and then they apologize, but they didn't do anything. Now I'm like, okay, I feel better. Thank you. You hurt me with your words and now I feel better. You said sorry.

And now all they've done is set me up for later for the next person to call me big, like to tell me I have a big nose and have to, you know what I mean? Like, it's like, it's, they're resetting the mousetrap. How about they come back and be like, what, that hurts your feelings? You haven't accepted the fact you have a giant nose yet. You know what I mean? Instead of saying sorry. your feelings you haven't accepted the fact you have a giant nose yet you know what i mean instead of saying sorry like they see me on the ground crying and they're like hey i just wanted to say i think it's about time you accept the fact you have a big nose so it doesn't hurt your feelings

anymore so you already know you have well you're i mean the first case you already know you have big nose if you're insecure about it right so i'm just using that as an example as like just like i just feel like sometimes when people say sorry that they're basically letting those people off the hook to just like come to terms with the fact like hey that's just the way the world is yeah there's a there's an apologies for themselves and not for the other person like joe rogan said sorry because for himself he didn't he didn't say sorry because he was like he didn't do anything wrong he was saying sorry to take the heat off him. You know like your wife, you say sorry to your wife because you just can't take the heat no more?

Hey, I'm sorry. You win. Versus like, hey, I'm sorry. That was stupid when I left the house this morning, left the bathroom fan on, and just left. Like that was dumb. And then it woke you up. I think it all depends on the intent of the message that was sent. Right? I think it all depends on the intent of the message that was sent. Right.

Like people trying to cancel comedians for trying to make everybody laugh. Like if your joke, if your intent of the joke was to make everybody laugh, right. Yeah. I can apologize for that. Right. Because your,

your, your intention, you can explain, Hey, you know, my intention was not to be hateful, and you can see that. That's easy to see, right? But if your intention was to be hateful, maybe you should apologize for it if you've grown from it and you realize you fucked up.

Hey, you want to see the craziest roast ever? I saw this the other day. Did I send this to you? Oh, I sent it to you already, I think. Which one? The tranny and the cripple on stage, and they go to war. Oh, yeah. You want to hear it again?

Sure. That was great, right? Weren't they amazing? I don't remember the whole dialogue. Okay. Did you see it, Caleb? I sent it to you, too. It's amazing.

It's so good, dude. It's so good. here we go listen up people this is incredible this is incredible tranny versus cripple no one ever brings up how fucking annoying you are Thank you, Ali Wang. Robin is unemployed, so it's a good thing she doesn't have to buy tampons. There are a lot of things Joe can't hold, like a microphone or his liquor, or the arms of a woman who actually loves him. My wings are straighter than yours, baby. Laura wants to be an actress, but she doesn't even portray a convention woman. I am transgender and I still use my dick more than you do. Thank you for that club.

Robin is so fat, the only thing bigger than her saddle is her bivococ saddle. That's a good one. You know what, guys? This isn't fair. I can't call Joe any slurs, and he gets to slur his way through this entire battle. That was good.

That was good. Robin has quit Smokey Pot because she would frequently forget what jitters she was. The only person who has ever fucked Joe is God. Good point. Okay, Robin belongs in the men's room.

Some say the women's room. I just want her to stop crying in the handicap stall. When I was 10 years old, this date took me away from my mother. I haven't seen her in 21 years. So, like Robin, both our mothers want their sons back. Oh, fuck. Joe, I mean this from the bottom of my heart. You're the only person in this room that I would not switch places with.

Joe, I hate how people always bring up your wheelchair and your voice and your disease. And no one ever brings up... That's pretty good. That's a good roast. That was brutal. You think those guys are freestyling? That had to have been pre-wrote. They had to have known that they was roasting

somebody. They had to have known they was roasting another person. Had to be. Nobody thinks that quick. You're going to have to know things about the person before they do it, don't they? You'd have to. things about the person before they do it don't they you'd have to i mean if you can freestyle if you can think of punch lines that fast you're you're like a special breed hey the cripples delivery is like chris rock level it's like fucking when he looks around at the crowd and shit and he's like like a praying man i don't think he can stop himself. Oh, fuck. He's good.

Oh, Riddell says no, not freestyle. Oh, my God. It's so good. Holy shit. Holy shit. That shit was good. Hey, that show that they do out of Austin, the Kill Tony show. That show. Kill Tony show. That show.

Yeah, have you ever seen that show? No. I don't watch a whole lot of stuff anymore. I carve enough time out of my day to watch two episodes of Cobra Kai with my kids every night. Wow. And that's it. That's all I have time for. Dude, I'm telling you, you won't find anybody that works harder than me.

I put in about 17, 18 hours a day. Doing? Work. Work. Social media. I love it. You're a good dude. I don't stop.

How many times do you post a day? It just all depends. Sometimes I get wrapped up with other things like backstage type stuff, behind the scenes. But I don't know. Sometimes I'll post five, six times a day. Sometimes I'll post two. And do you post separately? Where do you post? Instagram and TikTok? Instagram, six times a day. Sometimes I'll post two. And do you post separately to Instagram? Where do you post Instagram and TikTok? Instagram, TikTok and Facebook. And they're all separate

activities. You can't just post to one and it goes to all three. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's sometimes I'll do different variations of the same video and post it to all the platforms. Most of the time, I just because there's so many people that's like on instagram that's not on facebook or tiktok so many people that's on facebook that's not on other platforms so yeah i only do i only do instagram yeah hey but so but is there a way you can post to one and it goes to all three not really no okay there's no no one's made an app it's like hey post here we'll do the work for you. We'll send it to Twitch, Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, blah. Hey, are you doing shorts on YouTube yet? Yeah.

You are. How's that? You liking that? No. No, because it's just more work than it's worth financially? No, not really. I mean, the video's already made. All I have to do is just upload it.

Yeah. I don't know. YouTube's hard to grow. And if you don't get that, you know, satisfaction of seeing something, you know, you're eventually like, yeah, fuck it. I'm good without that platform. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's crazy. Have you ever scrolled through their shorts?

No. It's fucking nuts. Last night, I did a show podcast and afterwards me and the guest andrew hiller we scrolled through some of youtube shorts and dude there's like videos there that are so fucked like it makes me realize how much i'm not on the pulse like there's videos there with 145 million views and i i can't for the life of me figure it out me neither uh some of my videos that have kind of blown up over there on YouTube, I'm just like, that wasn't even a good of a video. Like some of my bangers like go nowhere. And I'm like,

I think it's a different age. I think it's a different age of people that are watching YouTube shorts. And that would be my kid's age. Right. I figured out my other audiences. I know which videos are going to blow up on Facebook. I know which ones are going to blow up on Instagram. And I know what's going to blow up on TikTok i know which ones are going to blow up on instagram and i know what's going to blow up on tiktok at this point is there a favorite kind of humor like potty humor or penis humor or mine with me boob humor yeah or no i'm just looking for a punch line punch i don't give a fuck right i'm always i try to send you stuff throughout the day that like would inspire you to make it like i like stitch something right but but you're never like oh that's great i'm gonna use that you just i just send you stuff and you just don't respond no no no like you you might eventually see it i've got

so much shit saved oh that's awesome yeah like if if you know i don't know sometimes just something just random happens and i think i'm like i'll say something just off the cuff to my wife or something. I'm like, oh, that's a good punchline to that video. I'll go back and find that video and post it. What's your Instagram account now? Oh, well, you know when you type in Justin Nunley, it's Instagram first. Oh, shit, you put on another 5,000 followers on Instagram. Mm-hmm.

I'm telling you, I don't stop. You can drown a hurricane. We never even got rain out of that hurricane. Seriously? Nope. We're supposed to get some back home. Supposed to be like a foot. That ain't right. Technically, it ain't wrong either though that ain't right technically it ain't wrong wow did it take a while for your wife to want to do

those with him not really you missed you missed the end punchline both times so i say it's all relative oh technically it ain't wrong either though i guess it's all relative i'm gonna tell you some all i think about when you're talking is I guess it's all relative. I'm going to tell you something. All I think about when you're talking is that girl's body shaking. And she has her tongue hanging out of her mouth and shit. Watch her tongue here.

I'll be here. Hey, I'm telling you, the best video that I think that I have done in a long time is right there. My opinion. I've got the shoes. I've got the dress and i have add listen did you know there's a tesla statue and silicone valid silicone valid silicon silicone is it silicone or silicon listen did you know that silicone breast implants explode during the cremation process anyways the tesla statue radiates free wi-fi hey now you do is that free flowing yeah is that a one taker uh so that was a progression video

like i initially did it with i have add listenedD. Listen, you know, there's a Tesla statue in Silicon Valley. And then as I was looking back at it, I was like, silicone breast implants. I was like, I should really, yeah. So then I set the phone back up and did it again, and that was it. And do they really explode? Yeah, that's why they have to remove them before cremation, because silicone breast implants explode. So do pacemakers.

Wow. Yeah, thatemakers. Wow. Yeah, that makes sense. Wow. That's fucking hilarious. Yeah, that's a great one. Huh. That's for $100,000. woods i'd fly into him like a damn tornado full of teeth hair and fingernails just molly whop him

upside the head listen did you know that the first commercial cell phone weighed nearly two pounds now you do would you punch your dad for a hundred thousand dollars does the bear sit in the woods i'd fly into him like a damn tornado full of teeth hair and fingernails just molly whop him upside dad better keep his head on listen did you know that the first commercial cell phone i had this friend who had a uh i god i hope i don't fuck this up she had a cyst on her ovaries this is in college and she had it taken off and when they cut the cyst open there was a there was hair in there and teeth and fingernails. Like that's the kind of shit that grows in cysts. Is that why you said that? No.

Oh. Have you heard that? Is that true, Caleb? I don't know. I think maybe like the substance that – yeah, I don't know. I'd have to look that up. I don't even want to. That's interesting

it's possible i guess justin are you upset that i'm just using your uh instagram to um for my show i don't give a shit okay good let's go on let's go on how i feel when i have to scroll to the year i was born oh good just a meme i used to watch that show god you were lazy that day okay here we go here we go i was lazy that day that's like the fifth thing fifth thing i posted that day here we go what are you looking at who the hell puts an open shower inside of a gym that is not what you were looking at yeah it, it was. What, is Bob over there just doing his third set of upright rows in the morning and Linda's in there just lathering it up

with Herbal Essence? Huh? Oh, shit. I see it. Who the hell puts an open shower inside of a gym? Hey! Do you get double the amount of views when you do shit like that? Yeah.

Because you have to watch it a second time to be like, what the hell? Was there an open shower? Yeah. I got that idea. What are you looking at? A year and a half. Who the hell put...

You think her boobs are real? Hell if I know. They're real enough if you can touch them. Oh, good point. That's a great point. You put them in your mouth, they're fucking real. Hell. If I know they real enough, if you can touch them. Oh, good point. It's a great point. You put them in your mouth. They're fucking real. Yeah.

Those are real. God. I wish I could dance like that. I could probably learn, right? Could I learn to dance like that? Why'd you meet my mic? I did. I meant to mute the screen.

It wasn't for you. Get your shit together, Caleb. I'm sorry, Justin. It's my fault. Don't apologize. It shows weakness. Just quit being a bitch. I heard a rumor that's not all of Justin you use.

Well, only when I'm in Florida. Hey, oh, can we talk about about did you watch the NFL game last night bro Tua did you see that hit on Tua no I fucking I don't know do you realize I work 16 hours a day and I don't have time to watch the fucking NFL do you fucking realize that I didn't watch the fucking game either

but I watched the highlights because that's all everybody was talking about last night. That guy's fucked up. Dude, he... Yeah, it was bad. I would say he may never play football again. I saw a hit the other day

on Instagram where the guy got up and couldn't walk. He was walking like a fucking baby giraffe. That was? Oh, that wasn't last night. It was the second time. He was walking like a fucking baby giraffe. That was? Oh, that wasn't last night. It was the second time. He's got hit like that twice now. The first time he got it. And the commentators are like, oh, my God. Oh, my God.

That one? Yeah, because he's like laying there with his fingers. So one time, hold on. I'll see if I can find it. Spell his name for me. From a medical standpoint, Caleb. Dude, you could easily have a brain bleed after that and you could like that's something you can die from if you don't get a diet and like the post dude fuck

mentally you could easily just never recover from that like you could end up being a vegetable see if i can find you know there was this one page on facebook last night because i was scrolling through seeing if you could see like a better video of it in this one NFL meme group. Their caption on the video was Tua just got hit so hard he's throwing gang signs up. I was like, it's a little too soon there, my guy.

Why is he doing this shit? His hands are up in his face like this. He's fucked up. I was like, it's a pretty good punchline, but probably wouldn't have said that so soon. That's the guy from a few weeks ago that got hit?

How can that be, the same guy get hit twice like that? The doctors cleared him. There was a doctor, a pretty well-known doctor, on Facebook yesterday that said if they let him play, they are completely irresponsible. 100%. Oh, this is

Sean Rockets fucking? Yeah, he posted about it. Okay. So he hits his head there. Where? After he fell down, his back of his head hit the ground and he can't even walk after that.

Oh, that's not the one I'm talking about. No, wait till you see last night's. And then this one, a week later, he gets thrown to the ground, back of the head, and then he can't even articulate with his fingers or he's lost all body control. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit.

Yeah, that's not good. He's having a seizure, right? It's a severe brain injury. Because my fingers won't even do that. So, decorticate fosteruring is what happened essentially. Decorticate posture is an abnormal posturing in which a person is stiff with bent arms, clenched fists, and legs held out straight. The arms are bent in toward the body and the wrists and fingers are bent and held on the chest. This type of posture is a sign of severe damage in the brain.

So do you think he'll ever play again? He could, I mean, no, probably not. I wouldn't be surprised if he never plays again. If he does, he's going to have to be seriously careful. So you're saying out of that hit last night, he could potentially be a vegetable for the rest of his life. Exactly. That wasn't even an illegal hit.

No, it wasn't. But the way he got slung to the ground and how hard his head bounced off that turf, my God. Also, think about how many times he's probably hit his head in the 20-something years that he's been playing football, too. Just all of those micro- impactions on his head. Like you, he could have severe memory loss.

He could just, I mean, he could have a slow brain bleed if he doesn't get it checked out. Like, Hey, I guarantee you when Brandon Waddell typed this out, he was laughing. I bet you tears came out of his eyes.

He probably thought he was so funny. Brandon Waddell says it closely resembles when people get the Holy Ghost in some churches oh you're so proud of yourself you should be by the way too I ain't hating I ain't hating that's good Justin and I are both like damn we should have said that

yeah not my joke hey is that what happens when people in the UFC I mean sometimes but man I feel like you see way more that what happens when people in the ufc when they not i mean sometimes but i man i feel like you see way more injuries in the nfl than in the ufc yeah what people don't understand is that those helmets aren't supposed to like they don't prevent concussions they just prevent like skull fractures ah the old fracture it's it's two completely different things they don't uh

i was gonna say something he's fixing to say something fucked up i'll just say something about condoms and preventing semen in the teeth but i didn't it wasn't gonna come out right wasn't gonna come out right check the helmet yeah you didn't show the other angle of that hit, though. Yeah, I didn't. Yeah, Caleb. You only showed one angle. I'm not apologizing this time. I'm probably going to get that shit pulled down. There was a wider angle from, like, the

sideline. They showed how violent that hit really was. Are you going to drink today, Justin? I don't drink oh really ever hardly ever it's friday i know okay here we go um dr tom hi we have a... Bam. Oh. Yeah. Wow. Wow. Why do you think he gets played so hard, though?

Tom Brady has never been hit like that or slung down like that. Oh, that guy's a quarterback? The guy who turned into a cripple? Yes. Oh, that's bad. That was Alabama's former quarterback, so he played at the University of Alabama Roll Tide. He stayed hurt a good bit.

And then he went to the National Racist League. That's cool. Hi, Tom. How are you? Hey, what's up? How are you doing, Tevon? I was just. Hold on.

Yes. This phone number really works? It only took an hour and 29 minutes for someone to call in yes i just popped in and you guys are talking about football so i had to jump on hey i don't know if anybody's ever said this to you before if you really wanted to fix the concussions and the hard hits with football you know you would do take their pads away you know why because if you're 350 pounds you cannot throw your body across the air like a freaking missile if you don't have that thick helmet on

and those big pads on look at the guys in rugby there's more orthopedic injuries in rugby because you land on their knees and their joints and stuff like that but you can't throw yourself at somebody at 30 miles an hour like you can when you're fully padded up. So all these pads are allowing these guys to throw themselves around recklessly, and that's what leads to all the injuries. Can you imagine what you would do with your penis if you put a helmet on the end of it?

Reckless. Well, there is a helmet on the end of mine. I don't know what yours looks like, but... Yeah, I've heard that before. It's the same thing. It's the same thing why they say MMA is, is, um, uh, you know, a little bit different, but similar to, um, MMA versus boxing. MMA supposedly is less brain damage. Um, because, uh, boxing, you're just being bludgeoned with a fucking hard pillow for

over and over and over and over and over. And same with headgear. It's the argument for why headgear and the amateurs. You try to stand six inches away in MMA and pound the guy's face the whole time, you're going to get your ass taken down and you're going to get your leg kicked out from under you. You can't do that in real life. You take six inches away from me. I'm a woman.

All right. I got to go back to work. I'm going to let you guys know. No, Tom. No, Tom. Yeah, I'm out of here. No. I got to make some money so I can go. All right, what?

Did Tom hang up? No, Tom's here. Tell him, Justin. Tell him. Don't be a bitch. What? Yeah, tell him. Don't be a bitch.

Tom, what are you gonna do When you get off the phone? Seriously I'm about to call Some of my prospects And try and sell some stuff Before the end of the day Alright

I hope you make a million dollars today I know you're gonna make A million dollars today I'm gonna get that bag, baby Let's go Alright, thanks for calling I'm gonna watch some adjustments Alright, Tom

Alright, peace and love I'm going to get that bag, baby. Let's go. All right. Thanks for calling. All right. Peace and love. I used to play tackle football without pads, and we still threw. Each other around. I'm sure is how he was going to finish that. Dude, before you had a brain seizure. Before you had a brain seizure. We still threw each other around. I bet that's where that was ending.

Oh, please. And at least Carver Dow's like saying, Bruce, you didn't throw shit around. At least you're a girl. They play putter-puff football. Fucking a same, Bruce. That shit gets crazy. You got thrown around by your high school boyfriend, Elise. You know.

Huh? Yeah. No one's safe. No one's safe. No one's safe. Oh, please. Here we go. I tackled just as hard and take some hard hits, but it was just once in a while. You didn't tackle shit.

That was the football team tackling you, girl. She's got to be talking about it in the bedroom. Yes. Has to be. As the football. Oh. Not powder puff, Justin. As a football. Oh. Not powder puff, Justin. I was in my 20s.

You're still in your 20s. What are you talking about? Yeah. She got tackled onto the casting couch. Yes. At least you want us to read the Mike Hunt book again. Oh, shit. You actually had your tailbone broken.

Yeah. Hey, at least you're not making it any better for yourself right now. Zero percent. We know exactly how your tailbone was broken. No, but for real, like you,

you play like in a women's league. Oh, don't try to soften the blow. No, I want to know. I want to know. Is there, there is a women's semi-pro league? I've never heard of this. There's a women's league oh don't try to soften the blow no i want to know i want to know did she is there there is a women's semi-pro league i've never heard of the football league it's like fucking bikini football though yeah they wear lingerie lingerie football of course we've all seen that oh my goodness uh she she she broke her collarbone playing dodgeball. This just gets better and better.

I bet she was playing dodgeball. You should have bobbed but you weaved. You should have weaved instead of bobbed. Why does people like Elise or Brandon or anything, why do they never call in? She's probably holding like a kid in each hand.

Brandon's probably like Brandon's probably works at a call center and he's taking calls while he's watching the show. I know. I didn't think that hit was that impressive either, to be honest with you. I prefer I wanted to see someone get speared. Okay, women.

And we should end the show with that. Women's football deserves equal pay. Oy, oy, oy. Okay, Brandon Waddell has called him before. I used to call him Brandon Waddell, and he had to course correct me. That's all I'm going to call him now because he likes to talk shit, so it's Brandon Waddle. At least Magnus isn't on here today.

That fucking guy. Jeff's not here either. Jeff was here this morning. Sir Collins. Elise says she's called in before. Justin, thanks for coming in. We didn't say a single word about the UFC, which I think is fine. I appreciate you having a computer.

Oh, what kind of computer is that? It's a laptop that you can fold and it turns into a tablet. I'm an upper middleclass white trash now. Dude, of course you are. You use a fucking PC. I'm on a show with two guys using PCs. That's fucking a joke. Holy shit.

I know my way around a PC. I've never really dove into Apple. Travis, but you use an iPhone, don't you? Yeah. All right. But you use an iPhone, don't you? Yeah. All right.

Mr. Bellinghausen from Vindicate, V-N-D-K-8.com. Hi. We're going to watch Justin squirm. Okay. I like the book. I'm calling him out. Why aren't you wearing the CEO shirt? No. Because.

I'm a bitch. Oh, he is squir bitch oh he is squirming he is squirming do i do i have a i have a ceo the last time last show you were on you said you didn't have i checked your shipping you motherfucker you got this on the night i did oh oh fuck him up, Travis. No, here's the thing on that. Let me explain. I just opened the package yesterday. I've got so many packages in my room that I don't even know what the hell I have. I don't have time. I never take time to open anything up. I'm just like, I stay working.

I work 16 hours a day. He's the only guy who brags about working harder than me. I work 16 hours a day, and I can't open up and put on my CEO hoodie. You didn't give me a hoodie. I don't see that skateboard on your wall yet. God damn it. If you would have sent me a hoodie, I would have cut the sleeves out and fucking rocked it. That's my style, baby.

T-shirts, I hate T-shirts. Guess who makes CEO hoodies? Hey, that's a pretty nice one, that black one. I've never seen that. Is that new? Yeah, that's the black tie-dye. God, I want to see Daniel Brandon in that. I want to see Daniel Brandon in that

crop hoodie. She should have hers too. So she better wear hers on the next show. Hey, she's got more packages than Justin. She's not seeing shit. And I know Justin's telling the truth too. Tom, Dick, and Harry's trying to get Justin to show their shit. Right?

It's ridiculous. All right. I just had to get after Justin a little little bit thank you no i did i did actually pull it out of the box yesterday and i was like oh i do have that more likely to get his son to wear it than him and he still doesn't have it on he got it out of the box i did i never pulled it probably pays more than the uh bingo you're a good you're a good dude travis s pro pays good um tomorrow morning at 7 a.m we have gary roberts coming on uh he has been juiced up he's been on the trt now for two months. Former Marine, most popular series in the history of CrossFit.com,

non-game content, Killing the Fat Man Season 1. If you haven't seen Killing the Fat Man Season 1, you should watch it tonight before Gary comes on tomorrow. Gary's put all the weight back on. The doctors had cut the skin off his body. When the fat came back, when he put the weight on,

instead of it being in his gunt, it started attaching to his organs. That's not good, right, Caleb? Because you have a limited number of fat cells, people. So when you get fucking skin surgically removed, you don't have those fat cells to store fat anymore. And so it attaches to whatever fat cells you have remaining, which are around your organs. That's not good. I called Gary. We talked talked he's going back to a crossfit gym he's been on the california hormones trt program now for over a month and a half

um it'll be fun to hear from him tomorrow see how it's going what are we talking about uh my guest tomorrow morning it's a joke i'm sorry i wonder if gary's gonna have a mustache like killer i don't know i saw a picture of his jaw looked all squared up and shit so all right my nose is running uh justin thanks for coming on glad to come on caleb thank you for for only showing us three angles of that hit hold on hold on there's one more video you gotta show yes let's do it hey caleb pull up just look up butt fucker 3000 no no no no no no no i'm telling you it's the funniest shit you've ever saw in your life it is it is from a you, it's the funniest shit you've ever saw in your life. It is from an online courtroom. It is the funniest shit I've ever seen.

And the fact that nobody laughs during the video blows my mind. Oh, it is a YouTube video. It's already on YouTube. It's a two-minute long video. I don't think you have to go through the whole two minutes. Yes, yes, send it. That right there is a full send. Here we go.

Exclusive. Good morning, sir. What's your name? Me? Yeah, you. Yes. Nathaniel Saxon sir your name's not butt fucker 3000 logging into my court the fact nobody's nobody's laughing here

a little bit uh what kind of idiot logs into court like that what's your name again nathaniel saxton sir but i don't believe that i typed anything like that and well that's what it says yeah you should i'll put you in the waiting room you can sit in limbo for a while and think about what you call yourself online. Holy shit! He's like, your name's Buttfucker 3000, you yo-ho.

Yo. How much medication is that judge on? Oh, my God. whatever he's taking to sedate him it didn't work and like he just broke right through that barrier well here i am wow that was wow wow justin you just made up for just sitting there like a log fucking dump on a log the whole show with that i appreciate you coming finishing hard like i do what i appreciate you coming finishing hard like hey i do what i can i always finish hard wow that was great hey i'm sending that to uh i'm sending that to people right now that is one of the funniest things i've ever saw. That is a butt fucker 3000. Fucking amazing.

That is amazing. Wow. I can't believe I'm... You have to watch the first minute. Justin, did you look at the... Hey, I'm going to send that to my mom.

Isn't she an attorney? She is. Oh, my God. I don't know. I don't know if I should send that to my mom. Definitely send it to your mom. Justin? Yeah, full sand.

Okay. Maybe should I put my sister on it to like soften the blow? Dude, I'm an asshole though. Like if it would have been like a Pornhub video and you would have been like, should I send that to my mom? I'd be like, absolutely, dude. Full send. I'm like, I like to watch the world burn.

God, I don't know. Shit. Just make sure you tell them in the text that do not open this in public. Make sure you have headphones in. Everybody says do it. Don't be a pussy. Send it. Watch the first

minute. But have headphones in. Justin says you should... No, fuck headphones. My sister lives in the middle of fucking texas on a hunting ranch there's like no one for 3 000 acres around her except my three nephews yeah um um oh shit someone just texted me and said i see this guy justin saves all his energy for his Instagram videos. It's early.

It is like he fucked you up. It's early. I've had one coffee and didn't have time to take my Adderall this morning. I'm all over the goddamn place in my own head right now. I like you. I like you. I like getting head to my hate. It's my favorite.

Okay. Thank you for coming on. Caleb, thank you. And we will see you guys tomorrow morning at 7 a.m. Stay classy. Yeah.