The Sevan Podcast - #778 - Olympics or Hyrox | Hunter's Future
Episode Date: January 27, 2023Support the showPartners:https://cahormones.com/ - CODE "SEVAN" FOR FREE CONSULTATIONhttps://www.paperstcoffee.com/ - THE COFFEE I DRINK!https://asrx.com/collections/the-real... - OUR TSHIRTS... Learn... more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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BAM! We're live.
Let's see if everything's working today.
Hi guys! Yo, Stephen Flores.
Philip Kelly.
I used to use a whoop. Not anymore.
Good morning, Seema.
Seema, did I see you
missing for a while?
Bruce Wayne, dude, thank you for all the thumbnails.
Crazy. Crazy, crazy, crazy.
Don't forget, we need one for yesterday's show.
I listen every day. Never catch the live. Crazy. Crazy, crazy, crazy. Don't forget we need one for yesterday's show. I listen every day.
Never catch the live.
Love the comment section.
You guys are hilarious.
Whitney Davis.
How come you don't ever catch live?
Are you just catching this one because we're starting so early?
It is early.
It's 6 a.m.
I am not sure what is going to happen to Suza or Mr. Hunter mcintyre today because um it's so early and i'm starting shows early
because as you can see i'm not in my home studio and i am in a room in a house in truckee california
up here with the family and friends.
There's a skate park here called Woodward and a ski resort called Boreal.
You know what I'm learning
is how few people really give a shit.
Like, you know when you buy a cup of coffee from someone
and they'll be like,
oh, by the way, there's half and half over there
and there's lids over there, and there's sugar over here.
And then there's – if your cup's too hot, I can double your cup for you.
Have a good day.
And you're like, well, shit.
You get a dollar for this $2.50 coffee or $4 coffee.
I'm going to give you a dollar.
And then there's just the other people who just don't give a shit.
This is like a world-class skate park that has – there was probably like 10 kids that worked there between the age of 20 and 25.
And it's just amazing how few of them actually give a shit, like less than half, like just zero fucks given. And I guess that's okay. They still get their paycheck. But, man, when you have – I think most of you guys know this, but the thing about life is it never changes from high school.
It's always a popularity contest.
It always comes down to who you know.
Dennis, good morning.
Judy, good morning.
Brandon Waddell, good morning.
Jamie Latimer, good morning.
Travis Bellinghausen.
Good morning.
Mark Moss.
Good morning.
It all comes down to who you know.
Everything in life comes down to who you know.
Excuse me.
And how you treat them.
At the end of the day.
It's 99.99999%.
And big face, big nose. big face big nose my face is small
face is small nose is average makes the nose look big but I appreciate it
appreciate the acknowledgement of my existence in any way or form
and so you have people coming into town especially at a fantastic place like
Woodward and you never know what's going to happen. If you're a 20-year-old kid
who works there, you should be exceedingly kind and polite and bring your A game to everyone.
Because there's people who come there from all over the world to enjoy the facility and you
never know who you're going to meet and what opportunities it's going to present.
And the bar is set so low. I didn't make the bet again. Thank you.
I don't make it at home. My wife makes it at home. but I'm making it here. I kind of make it. It's just a sheet and a comforter. You never, ever, ever know who you're going to meet, and you shouldn't do anything half-ass anyway.
You will always feel better when you're nicer to people and you give them your 100% of your A game.
I found there's some really interesting shit going on always on Instagram.
I want to show you guys this here real quick.
You got, oh wait.
Section here.
Share.
Things will be a little slower than normal.
I'm lacking several screens.
Look at this.
This is from the Pfizer Instagram account.
First of all, they've turned off their comments and I'll explain to you why here very soon.
Yeah, people think.
Thank you, Jay.
People will walk up to me and tell me that it's obvious I dye my hair.
And my mustache because of the discrepancy in my hair colors but i don't do it either uh okay so uh right here this is the pfizer uh instagram account it's quite it's it's
crazy hilarious look at this give your child an active role in their health
i haven't even clicked this one let's click this one and see what it says.
Ask care providers to explain in simple language encouraged questions and curiosity about their care.
Care providers.
How about ask your CrossFit coach?
Just idiot shit.
But look at this.
This is what caught my eye.
Myrna, the mRNA.
This is the CrossFit game same
same marketing team
Myrna the mRNA look it
they have little characters like the CrossFit games
little little
look it hi I'm Myrna I'm a
messenger a ribonucleic acid
molecule
I can't even believe it
I'm willing to bet that the woke-ocracy, the wokest who run CrossFit games,
the ones who have forgotten that the protocol that they have in crossfit is a cure for the world's most
vaccine problem the irony of it right i'm guessing that they got their idea for their characters from
the pfizer uh instagram account i'm willing to bet that i know it sounds crazy you have to
understand how much crazy uh ridiculous shit they do over there let Let's see. Oh, by the way, they finally made a good piece of media.
I don't know if you've seen this video with Adrian Bosman,
but they didn't make it.
Street Park, he made it.
But this is actually a fantastic piece of content over here.
This Adrian Bosman video, if you guys haven't seen it,
this thing is funny.
Sean Sullivan, hi.
Good morning.
Herbert Fillers.
Joe, yeah, Joe the Camel, exactly.
Joe the Camel, to me, have to market. Yeah. Joe, the camel. Exactly. Joe,
the camel to me,
uh,
have to market to the demographic they're going after,
but you know,
uh,
Herbert,
they should have made it like Carl,
the camel,
you know,
I think that the first name and the last name have to be the same.
I think that's part of the protocol,
but CrossFit actually did that shit.
Look at this.
Come back,
Cameron.
I wonder,
I wonder if he's triple boosted
you think hunter's gonna come on oh look oh look at badass betty very creative very creative anxious alley
oi oi which brings us to
this
I probably wouldn't have talked about any of this if
if Hunter was on
so at least this gives us a second
if you do not follow this account
you have to follow this account
Project Veritas with James O'Keefe
holy smokes
holy smokes
holy smokes uh jack you know what is happening though i talked to some people in the military
they're no longer kicking people out of the military for being unvaccinated this was a while ago but just found out there is some shenanigans they're playing uh there are there
are rules that are that they're sharing with the public and then there are different rules uh inside
so we shall see uh exactly how this um plays out oh you don't even know crossword is sport of
diversity equity and inclusion you don't even know you don't even know. CrossFit is a sport of diversity, equity, and inclusion. You don't even know. You don't even know. Many, many – when there was the regime change, many, many, many, many unqualified people were put into very high-level positions all over CrossFitting.
The genitalia in their pants, the color of their skin, and whose genitalia they want to touch with their hands.
And who that they've been intimate with.
It is a – I would love to share it with you, but I'm being nice. I didn't appreciate it when I worked over there and there were people who were throwing stones at the ship that i was on so i've tried to walk a fine line of
telling you guys the truth of what's going on over there and not trying to send over any massive
torpedoes but there's there's some yeah that's everywhere yeah fair enough yeah i guess you're right fair enough yeah you
whiny little bitch that's seven it's fair enough no i'm not going across the gym you know what i
did yesterday i did uh with my wife and uh greg's wife we did uh five minutes of lunges and five
minutes of uh max max lunges in five minutes and max air squats. I thought I was going to wake up broken this morning, but I'm actually okay.
Okay, here we go.
This is just unreal.
I hope you guys can hear this.
This is just crazy.
And this is why I have to assume this is why Pfizer turned off its comments on its Instagram account.
this is why Pfizer turned off its comments on its Instagram account.
This is Jordan Tristan Walker.
He's the Pfizer Director of Research and Development,
Strategic Operations, and mRNA Scientific Planning. director of research and development strategic operations and mrna scientific planning
they're exploring mutating the virus themselves so that they can get ahead and make vaccines for it.
Oh, really? There is no sound? Okay, standby. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You don't need
sound. I'm just going to tell you what he's saying. No, I'm just joking. Hold on. Let me redo this.
you what he's saying. No, I'm just joking. Hold on.
Let me redo this.
I'm outside of my skill set.
Here we go.
Project Veritas. Okay.
Here we go. Let's try again.
Here we go.
Ultimately, he's thinking about
mutating COVID.
Well, that's not what we say to the public.
No, don't tell anyone.
Don't tell anyone.
We're exploring, like, you know how the virus keeps
mutating? So he already said, he said
the questionnaire guy goes,
so you guys are thinking about
mutating the virus? And he goes, well, we don't
say that to the public.
Yeah. Well, one of the things we're exploring is, like,
why don't we just mutate it ourselves? Why don't we mutate it ourselves so we can create undeniably developed new vaccines
right so we have to do that if we're going to do that though there's a risk of like as you could
imagine no one wants to be having a pharma company mutating viruses we like very controlled to make
sure that this virus that you mutate doesn't create something like, you know, it goes everywhere.
It's crazy.
It's the way that the virus started moving.
To be honest, it makes no sense that these viruses pop out of nowhere.
Yeah, I know.
He also acknowledged there that it makes no sense that viruses just pop out of nowhere.
Meet Jordan Tristan Walker, a director of research and development strategic operations and mRNA scientific planning at Pfizer.
It sounds like gain of function to me.
I don't know. It's a little bit different. I think it's different.
It's like, it's definitely not gain of function.
It sounds like it is. I mean, it's okay.
No, no, no, no, no.
Directed evolution is very different.
Oh, he's calling it directed evolution instead of gain of function.
I see some of you guys are talking about Coca-Cola over there.
I don't know if you saw what just happened over at Coca-Cola.
I'm going to try to get the guy on the podcast.
But there was a guy over there that worked on their marketing team, and that was the playbook in Coca-Cola.
That every single person who stood up against Coke
was to be called a racist.
And they did, and I can't wait to,
if I can get this guy in the podcast,
it's going to be amazing.
That was Coca-Cola's playbook.
The story broke a couple of weeks ago.
Well, you're not supposed to do game function research
of the viruses.
Like, yeah, they probably not. But you do like these, like. Coke was canceling people, calling them racist we're not supposed to do function research of the viruses like yeah
but you do like these like
coke was cancelling people calling them racist
if you said anything bad about sugar or coke
sounds familiar right
yeah
oh here we go
no okay here we go
so like the actual mutations
to try to keep it more potent yeah so there is research did the actual mutations that I see could be more potent?
Yeah.
So there is research ongoing about that.
I don't know how that's going to work.
There might not be any more outbreaks,
to think Jesus Christ.
The gentleman seems to have
absolutely no moral compass at all.
It's a revolving door for all government officials.
It's pretty good for the industry, to be honest.
Yeah.
It's bad for everyone else in america why
is it bad for everybody else because if the regulators have to approve our drugs you know
that once they shop in your regulator they won't work for the company they're not gonna be as hard
regulators who work for the company it's good for them but bad for the rest of america
oh my goodness hey the thing is that this isn't an isolated incident it's not like
something we didn't know there's there's so much content out there like this it's a never-ending
stream it feels like it doesn't even matter it feels like no one cares that account only that That account has a million followers while The Rock has 240 million.
It's never-ending.
So, I don't know.
But I love it when I see stuff like this.
I'm crazy, crazy impressed by Project Veritas.
That guy is a beast. It's a never-ending flow no i i wish it was yeah i know that's how i feel too right god bless project veritas like when
people are like that that guy's a national treasure you know usually it's like like no he's
not but that guy is a national treasure that's real
journalism yeah it's it's so good hey and and and the fact that pfizer is reacting and they
turned off their the comments on their uh instagram account i don't even think that's
their big story i think they have another big story that's gonna break any day now also that they're like saying is gonna like be their biggest one yet so um uh skate park is is uh the most special thing about
the skate park here in Truckee is that it's empty there's no one there it's uh I don't know how big
the place is I'd say a hundred thousand square feet it's a trampoline park but not like your traditional trampoline park, like one of those cool commercial ones.
This one's specific for like Cirque du Soleil stuff.
They have stuff there that like – you know those guys you see?
I don't know where you see them, but on the internet or on Instagram, and they're jumping on the trampolines, and then they walk up the wall to a ledge.
It's like stuff like that.
and they're jumping on the trampolines and then they walk up the wall to a ledge.
It's like stuff like that.
And then they have six or seven ramps called mega ramps of different heights.
And you go down those at different speeds and then you launch into a foam pit.
And I don't know what the rules are, but I've seen people slide down on their butt.
I've seen bicycles, scooters, uh, skateboards, and then there's a bowl there. Um, and there's a bowl there. That's just a, uh, you know, just like a regular skate
park, like a really nice skate park. And then upstairs there's a bar, not a good bar. It doesn't
have like, um, it's just like beer. I don't even drink beer. And, uh, and that's it. It's, it's,
drink beer and uh and that's it it's it's missing so many things like it's it's cool it's cool it's cool i don't want to i'm the verdict's still out it's cool i'm glad we're here i won't be like
eager to come back to this uh specific place um the the the people there i'd give it who worked
there i'd give a c it's just
no no white claw either i didn't see any white claw i looked uh and but uh the but at boreal
the ski resort where it's there we had a the kids took a ski lesson they learned how to ski
the both those ski instructors there were really cool we screwed it up we signed up on the wrong
date so we got there yesterday and the guy's like, hey, your lesson's not for two days, but they accommodated us anyway. They had the guy who was like the management guy, you know, come out of his office and suit up and teach my kids. And he was cool as shit.
I started him with no lift, then the carpet, and then took him up on the big lift, and I watched him ski down.
I do think I saved my kid's life, though, yesterday.
He was bombing down one of the bunny runs, and it looked like he was going to launch into a tree, and I grabbed his arm.
With my bad arm, I felt it get hurt again.
But I grabbed him by his arm really quick and snagged him.
Actually forced him to crash.
All of our institutions are corrupt, yeah.
I'm okay with a little corruption, but there's a difference between – I don't know. I don't know what the metaphor is here. room and you look out your window and you see someone changing in the building next to you. Like, like one time I stayed in this hotel room in Seattle at the, uh, four seasons and in the hotel across from me or apartment buildings behind me, there was this guy, he looked like he was
maybe 60 and he was undressing like this 30 year old woman right in front of the window. And then
they had sex on the bed and I could just see it. And like, I didn't close my blinds. I just pulled up a chair and watched, you know? And, uh, that's different than, um, good going over there and looking through a door in the crack.
And then, and then, and then that's also different from like going to paying two people to have sex.
And then that's different from, uh, raping someone like there's levels, you know, uh,
you know uh there's levels to the um
there's levels to it you there's a difference between you're walking and they put the parking lot of the ski resort and you find a glove on the ground and you pick it up and maybe you set it on
the hood of a car that you walk by and or it's maybe it's a pair of gloves and then you come
back you know at the end of the day 12's maybe it's a pair of gloves and then you come back you
know at the end of the day 12 hours later and the gloves are still there and then you take them
versus the first time you see the gloves you just take them for yourself like there's just levels to
it i i had this friend i think i told this story really really disappointed me i had this friend
we were somewhere together i can't remember a skate park or something and there were too many
micro scooters there at the skate park that someone had left.
Those things are like 150 bucks each.
And we saw them.
And then the next day I came back with my friend and I'm like,
Oh,
someone must've come back and got those scooters.
And he's like,
no,
no,
I came back here last night and got them.
Like,
what do you mean you came back here last night and got them?
Like just leave those out until the person comes back
that's it just leave just just leave uh do you smoke a cigarette when they're done no i did i
always uh brandon waddell i always leave the hotel blinds open. Just so people like, that's like your way of experimenting with being a voyeur.
No, not a voyeur, exhibitionist.
I'm okay with it.
I don't do it, but it's cool.
It's exciting for everyone else who might sneak a peek.
When my wife and I didn't live together many many years ago she had this apartment
and the neighbors were always getting at it just crazy sounds and at first i thought it was cool
but it got old so quick got old so quick uh live 20 minutes ago damn two times speed to catch up that's good oh look we got a new guy
in the comments I've never seen this guy
Brandon Lecoq
Brandon Lecoq
am I pronouncing that right Lecoq
try having roommates
yeah I had roommates and all that shit
housemates
I do want to do a public service announcement for you guys
very important that you guys uh recognize this uh here we go let me see
share screen i wish you guys could see what i'm working with what a mess okay uh brace yourself
I'm working with. What a mess. Okay. Brace yourself. Here we go. See if I get the volume here.
Stroke season is coming. You better get your shot.
There's this link between influenza, infection, and stroke.
Yeah. I didn't know about this either until last year, but it turns out that after flu season, about three or four weeks later, there is a stroke season. And like
you said, most of Canada is getting down off of a big hump of flu. So now we're starting to see
more strokes. And a friend of one of my colleagues actually mentioned that. Are you guys hearing this?
After flu season in Canada comes stroke season. This is real. I mean, not the, not the story. The idiots
who believe this, they allow people to come on TV and say this. Here we go. And I worked the other
day and said, have you noticed how many strokes we're seeing? It's a lot more than usual. It
feels like. So anecdotally, we're starting to see that. The good news is anecdotally,
we're starting to see more strokes. I never knew until one of my colleagues told me that after flu season is stroke season.
Oh, my goodness.
Have you ever?
Listen, I've been everywhere, Brian, everywhere.
I'm the most traveled and seasoned and socially astute and ethnically, racially aware, experienced person on the planet today.
Thank you very much. I have a nose hair. I can feel it. I've been everywhere.
The most socially conscious person that's ever walked the planet. That's it. End of story. Okay,
here we go. Back to stroke season. Reduces your risk of stroke
according to a study from the University of
Calgary right here.
Tell us more about this. So what is this
link between influenza?
Unbelievable, dude. That's the news
in Canada. It's
stroke season.
Seema, I did. So I
failed yesterday. I was like, you know
what? I'm just going to not eat tomorrow and, um, see what it does to my mucus. And, uh, I don't know what time it was,
but so in the morning we go skiing. That's why I'm starting the show so early. And when I say
we go skiing, like I just stand there, although I might go skiing today and my kids ski. Uh,
so then after skiing, we went to a hamburger place.
And I broke and I ate a double cheeseburger.
And within 10 minutes, all my boogers came back.
So there's that.
Anyway, everyone be careful.
Stroke season, especially if you live in Canada, comes directly after.
I wish Susan could have seen that.
Crazy dude.
Hey, there's people who believe that.
Oh, man, it's too bad Hunter's not here.
I found a new sport for Hunter.
Oh, you guys are going to like this.
I wonder if I'm going to get in trouble for showing this.
Sevan, I just met a new girl.
I am hoping stroke season is coming.
Fair enough.
I feel you.
I feel you.
Sevan, you just bring a light and plastic sled.
You make me sound like I'm retarded
like I should be drooling also
it's the dairy
I don't know
I get boogers if I eat anything
when I open mouth kiss my wife I get boogers
I just
yeah that's a great question
does Hallmark have happy stroke season cards great
question so kenneth um if you and it's not cheap here either so it's 54 to use the skate park
and the trampoline park and you only get to use them for two hours so you got to use them like
one hour each they're not enforcing any of that right now because there's so few people there and they're just letting it just roll is mr high rock high cox showing up or is he a no show who knows
fuck that dude mr mcintyre holier than thou i hope he shows
no one wants to come on at 6 a.m. This is, this is, this is why,
this is why the show is going to succeed.
And I'm going to be patting myself on the back the whole way.
And that is going to succeed.
It has succeeded by the way.
Um,
and I,
and because of us,
but,
um,
cause I do this.
Oh,
seven.
Why don't you just take a break?
Why don't you go fuck yourself?
Why don't you go take a break?
You know how good I feel after this show?
Paper Street Coffee, Gabe speaks up.
Finally, a voice of reason.
This is the best time.
Mr. David, you're not late.
I am early, and I apologize.
We will get back on track soon to our regular 7 a.m. shows.
Until then, I think this is going to get us in trouble, but sometimes we just have to do what we have to do.
So this Slap League thing is underway.
I don't know how i feel about this thing uh let me see what the
this thing is just nuts if you guys haven't seen this brace yourself this is crazy
oh yeah yeah yeah yeah before uh chris birchfield did you see the article about dr fatima uh
stanford she is one of biden's new
health czars she believes obesity cannot be cured with a healthy diet and exercise because she
believes it's genetic so i know you guys know this already uh but it's just enough it's more
just word fuckery it's the same thing with gender and sex and it's all the things not that they are
going to change the meaning of obese you are are now not going to be obese, but you have obesity.
Watch this trick they're about to pull.
We're going to see it happen in real time.
You're going to get to see it's going to be like, you know, you have type 2 diabetes.
You have cancer.
You have a giant nose.
You have a huge cock.
It's now going to be you have obesity.
Watch this trick.
And words don't matter, Seve.
It's not like that it's with no poetic
license and no hyperbole there's only magic going on here the the lowest forms of us humans which
is 99 of us we just we're just tricked by words we don't even know it. I even tell people and they still don't know it.
I don't know if the UFC bought it,
but I know Dana somehow,
I don't know if they bought it or they made it, but it's crazy.
This shit is crazy.
Brace yourself. Here we go.
There's audio. I can't hear audio
oh yeah there's audio
so someone you someone some judge said fair so the chick got slapped and then someone said fair
meaning i guess that there's some sort of rules on like which part of your hand has to hit
the face or something
yeah right is it dumb okay
I'm willing to be told what I'm seeing here
this is
I'm open this is one of those things where I need
help
they're like
she's got a great chin
I don't think Dana likes red cities
oh isn't it ironic wow I never even thought of it
Dana's sitting there watching
women slap each other
I like Dana I can't pick
on Dana but it's weird but it's
there is some comedy there for sure
here we go
oh one of the rules is you can't flinch There we go. You're good? Good?
Two.
Oh, one of the rules is you can't flinch.
So you're not allowed to flinch.
With your right hand.
Okay, and your feet square.
Two, right hand so that's another rule of this uh thing
ahead of time you have to tell the judge how many pumps you're gonna make towards the face
so that way you don't surprise them so if let's say you have like you know how she pulled back
once and then slapped on the second hit like you could say five i guess i don't know what the
max number of pumps is but you could go one so i think that's why he said two right hand
so it's like hey it's gonna come on you're gonna get slapped on the second pump and it's going to be with the right hand.
And look, so she goes down. The judges kind of catch her
and then
she does a somersault.
And then the other lady is worried about her.
The lady that hit her is worried about her.
In the
2009 CrossFit Games,
they had to do this crazy run up in the hills and when they came back
people were passing out and uh one chick there was this makeshift stadium that probably sat like a
thousand people with bleachers and you had to run down that dirt hill in aromas and you had to run
through these two bleachers and one girl didn't make it through the opening even though it was 10 feet wide and she and she ran underneath the bleachers and got just fucked up and i was
you know we saw jason kaliba pass out at that game on the run but there was another girl if you guys
i don't know if you guys remember her her name was valerie voverill and she she was so jacked up
she did a somersault across the finish line like that girl did.
And then I know maybe you've seen enough of slap fighting, but I have to show you this just because of the technique.
Look at this guy on the right.
There must be weight classes, right?
guy on the right there must be weight classes right I'm getting sort of the feeling that the oh and look at he's holding look at this thing he's holding
oh that must be part of the rules too you have to keep your hands behind your
back and hold this hold this bar so there's like one position okay anyway you're gonna trip look at this guy's technique
here on the right
let me see get some audio in here
look at this
this technique is nuts
I was thinking this could be Hunter's new gig
Hunter McIntyre could be doing
see that
he's incorporated the squat into his slap it's the next level right not just a not just a rotation
My goodness.
My goodness.
I don't know why they took the camera off that guy.
He's got to go back down to one knee.
Take his mouthpiece out.
My goodness.
Crazy, right?
Anyway, I was talking with Hunter yesterday and he was just
telling me maybe exploring
some of his options were going forward
he still wants to do something
competitively
and
Austin Hartman I know this is
going to sound not very crossfitty but does anyone
else not love training at unaffiliated gyms um uh austin hartman i know it's this is gonna sound not very cross-fitty but does anyone else
not love training at uh unaffiliated gyms does not does anyone else not love what what's the
difference i don't know if i've ever been to an unaffiliated gym
i like training at home i like training at home.
I like training at gyms too.
Someone recently was telling me about their experience like at a Globo gym.
And I used to love that too.
I was never one of those people who hated going there.
My nephew just came to town and he belongs to a Globo gym in town.
And they have an ice bath there and a sauna and what else
do they have they have some other and a hot tub
they have all sorts of like cool shit there
seven
your home gym is unaffiliated
oh okay good point okay yeah
and I go to one every day
yeah what's the difference I
I don't think that there is a difference except that the
except i do kind of question the people who
have a gym that's unaffiliated like i kind of want to hear why they're unaffiliated because
i mean clearly they're a crossfit gym because um have you just been ranting by yourself for 30 minutes? Because of the methodology.
Hunter, hi.
How did you get here?
Have you been doing this by yourself for 30 minutes?
I do it every morning.
How does that work?
Are you talking to somebody or is someone talking to you like God?
God and Philip Kelly.
I go to Global Gym in the morning and crossfit in my garage in the afternoon
that's insightful
house
did I pronounce that right
that's a deep quote
house
I'm in a garage right now
I just did a little bit on you
what'd you do
I showed slap fighting and and I was like, um...
I would crush.
You would do that? You would crush that?
Yeah, I just don't want to pop my eardrum.
That's the only thing.
Oh. Oh, I think we might have an audio issue with you.
No, I put my mic down there.
A little crackly. Not bad. Not bad.
This is good. This is quality, dude.
Hey, don't you have a podcast
studio i mean not a studio but like something like i have like a place where you do all of
your podcasts you have a girl you had a girl over last night and that's why you're in the garage
she's still sleeping yeah totally a bunch of whores tell me what's going on why are you in
the garage there's some reason no this is the training house that i have down in san diego so like this is not my normal home ah yeah yeah yeah so basically most of my life is between the cabin and malibu and
now we got this training house down here which is rowdy as fuck we call it boys town yeah it's
just me living with a bunch of 25 year old boys yeah boys. Yeah. And it's a blast. Hunter was balls deep.
That's a quote.
Yes.
That's a quote.
Yes.
This is quality, dude.
Hey, what's going on, dude?
Yes, studio?
Yo.
Are you just the man in the background who's always watching,
kind of like that kink husband?
That's exactly.
Susan, I think your YouTube is still playing.
You're going to make me.
Yeah. Corey, I like this.
This is Hunter with Balls Teeth.
Pound Town, that's good.
Travis is already.
Is this your grown man fan base that doesn't have anything else to do?
And they're like, yeah, the Spooge Master is here.
Let's do this.
Let's all talk about sex.
This is the first time they've had the opportunity in the past decade.
Dude, it's just right here.
That's the term.
You're a cuck.
Sousa, you sit in the background and you watch other men sleep with your podcast partner.
I don't like that.
Cut that part.
Edit that part.
Oh, my God.
I just realized I had a dream last night that i said something on the
podcast that i wanted to have edited out but i but i realized that we were doing the podcast live
and i couldn't edit it out everyone already heard it wow i've never had that dream before
and today's show i don't know you had a dream i'm remembering my dream last night that i said
something you could say anything that would get you canceled because everything you do say is pretty profoundly canceled yeah not not it wasn't something
that would get me counseled it was something like i didn't want people to know like that i had a
small penis or that like you know like like that i'm really not armenian and i'm irish like it was
just like something that would be a groundbreaking penis thing but that irish liar that would be a groundbreaking small penis thing. But Irish liar, that would be crushing.
That would be crushing, crushing, crushing.
Okay, so we had a little talk yesterday.
Yeah.
Oh, by the way, I just want you to know this.
When we had you and Gary and Hunter on, we got a lot of feedback saying that, okay, that was a good little stunt, but we really just want Hunter by himself.
Gary ruined Hunter.
It was like putting peanut butter on
something that peanut butter shouldn't be on, you know?
Gary was crazy, dude.
Gary?
Gary's one of those kids that comes over to the house
and the mom's like, hey, please,
just don't let him have any sugar.
And then he's like,
he gets into the freezer and gets all the candy he got to the
mountain dews uh real question anyone have energy issues with sex since we uh since we crossfit
since we sew crossfit wads i will say that when i was in like peak peak shape for crossfit i
wouldn't have sex with anybody i was so dead it. It was so stupid. The worst shape that I've ever
been in my entire life is when I was doing really, really like hardcore training for CrossFit.
That was the worst shape you've been in your life?
Worse shape.
Explain that. Explain that to me.
Well, I just like it was very over-trained. I think just like the, I was doing six days a week.
I was talking to somebody about this when I was doing a bike ride yesterday. I was doing six days a week. I was talking to somebody about this when I was on a bike ride yesterday. I was doing six days a week of hard strength training,
no four days a week of hard strength training and six days a week of wads.
And it just crushed me.
Like your,
your body's not supposed to take on that much volume and,
and just like your body can only take so much weight in a week.
So if you think about it,
like you can spread that thing out but if every
single week you're putting some every single day of the week you're putting some kind of barbell
on yourself it just chewed me up dude and one of the things that your penis turned off
i mean like everything everything turned off there's only two times in my life that my penis
has turned off and one was when i filmed this show boundless i was traveling around the world doing all the hardest endurance races and it killed me i had no dick i had no soul i pooped
my pants like half a dozen times that year without no no shit i would just be in the car and i would
just shit my pants one time we did this race we were in scotland i ate jack in the box once and
that happened to me i wish jack in box would do that to me, but it took ultra-endurance races to wreck my butt.
Dude, one time we were in Aberfeldy, Scotland, like the most beautiful place.
It's where – what's the name of the woman who wrote Harry Potter?
J.K. Rowling.
It's where she wrote all of her books.
It's just like absolutely incredible.
Bro, bro, she wrote her books in.
She started in a coffee shop, I think, but then she finished her books in.
Yeah.
No, not in London.
Because I went to the coffee shop.
Essex.
I had a film play there.
I don't want to ruin Hunter's story, but go on, Hunter.
Yes, go on.
J.K. Rowling, you're name dropping.
Go on.
Name dropping. But I'm just trying to say Hunter's story, but go on, Hunter. Yes, go on. J.K. Rowling, you're name dropping. Go on. Name dropping.
But I'm just trying to say how picturesque this place is.
And we're in these botanical gardens, and we just finished doing the Scottish Ultra.
And I'm literally there walking with one of my girlfriend co-partner.
She and I are walking, and it's so beautiful.
I'm having a good time.
One of my friends calls, and I pick up, and I'm like, hey, man.
I just turned my phone off airplane mode.
It's like, how are you?
And I felt a fart. And I was like, I'm like hey man I just turned my phone off like airplane mode it's like how are you and I like I felt a fart and I was like I'm a big man I can hold this fart and all of a sudden it just went boom like through like broke through the barriers and I was like
what he's like what's wrong dude I was like I just shit my pants I gotta go and it was one of
these kind of poops that literally it it hit the back of the
pants and then went outward wow wow yeah yeah i was so covered in it that she had helped wipe me
like i couldn't get out of it it's like a dam breaking 100 wow nice suza jesus wow suza have
you seen the video of the hoover dam opening after a long time and it like starts out as this like hard packed fudge i've never seen susan do that hunter by the way i've never seen him like
he this show is like um allowing him to explore new levels of creativity you told the story and
he brought a picture to it yeah i've never seen him do that i'm surprised i got it this you're
inspired you're inspired you gotta get you gotta get the
video of the hoover dam being opened up after a long time and it's insane you let a girl um
clean poop off of you oh yeah and then the worst part about is i'm covered in my own poop this is
like a movie so i'm covering my own poop and i'm trying to like wipe it off on the ground but i'm
still covered in poop and it's like an empty botanical garden. So I walk up to like the center where I'm trying to go get to a sink.
And all of a sudden,
this old man walks out
and I'm talking about like ancient.
And he starts talking to us.
He's like, how do you like the gardens?
And I'm just like covered in my poop.
And I look at her.
I'm like, yo, distract this dude.
So then I just walk over to a birdbath next to him.
He's talking.
I just start washing myself off.
In the birdbath?
In the birdbath? In the birdbath. The bird's the birds then ate my food did you really drop your butt in a bird bath
no i washed my hands i washed my hands oh it is like an episode of family guy hey what's the
what's the reason for that what what is you can't be the only like ultra marathon athlete
um who's it's some there's got to be some sort
of mechanism that you guys push the body to where the sphincter loses its i think probably because
your body's just so exhausted and you don't even know it that it's losing all of its just
capabilities like your neural pathways are just all off to some degree. So like my little rope that goes down, it's like a telephone cord that goes down from my butt to my brain.
It's just a little bit off.
Not in many years, but I don't know.
The last time I really hurt my back deadlifting was probably like 10 years ago.
And where you have to like crawl into a shower to pee.
Have you ever had that kind of back pain?
Often.
And I was starting to lose.
I got a little scared.
I was starting to lose control of my.
I never peed my pants, but like it wasn't good.
Like something in my back was pinched or something.
And it was like.
Would your wife like pick you up and carry you in?
It would affect.
Did she carry you around in a papoose?
No, I would just.
I stayed on the floor.
You want to know what's crazy about it?
I stayed on the floor for basically three days in a hotel room, and I would just slither to the bathroom and pee in the shower.
And I just didn't move for like three days.
And then she got a doctor friend of ours to prescribe us a bunch of drugs like Vicodin and painkillers.
Let's get high as shit and pee all over each other.
And yeah, and painkillers get high shit and be all over each other.
And dude, when I heard the prescription was filled, I got up, got dressed and walked three miles to the fucking law.
It was a mile there and a mile back.
And I walked there to the fucking longs to get the prescription.
That's what the Pavlovian effect, knowing that I had drugs waiting at a pharmacy nearby.
So I walked down there like a mile and a half down there, got the drugs, of water took way more than i should have and by the time i got home i was better
true story i have no god as god is my witness i have no connection or tied drugs anymore i have
like i don't know why i don't get excited about it at all people people will be like you know
you know you know vicodin and uh
what's the painkiller one it's the little tiny red ones what i don't know percocet no i think
percocets are blue no um it's a muscle relaxer it's a muscle relaxer flexerol value flexerol
flexerol so i pop like i get i get to the pharmacy i pop a couple flexerol a couple vicodin
drink the water and within fucking 15 minutes my back whatever's in my back, loosens up and lets go.
And I can finally check out of the hotel.
I basically check out of the hotel and go home because the hotel was like 60 miles from my house.
Holy fucking – what did you do though?
Just deadlifting.
And so someone goes, hey, you know that's not fixing the problem.
It's like, listen, asshole.
I was stuck on the floor for three days
and I take four Vicodin and four Flexerol
and I can now go home.
I'm like, fuck you.
Like, yeah, it fixed the problem.
Screw you, bro.
Yeah, like, yeah, I know it's,
they're just drugs, but like, fuck off.
I drink to mask my feelings.
Yes.
Yes.
Hey, I've been a virgin.
I'm 37 years old and I'm a virgin and then one night i drink a
bottle of wine and i lose my virginity it's wine like i'm gonna go on a one let me binge wine for
a year jonathan 499 got to go but tell hunter to hit me up for one-on-one coaching or consult
is he paying you or are you paying him i I'm probably going to have to pay him, dude.
That's what my whole life nowadays is just having to pay people.
What was I trying to show you guys?
Check this out.
Guy goes to Mexico to kill himself, spends a week doing coke and banging hookers, and decides to keep living.
Wait, wait.
Can you put that – I want to read that again.
Guy goes to Mexico to kill himself, spends week doing coke and banging hook.
Oh, that's verbatim what you read.
That's not like – that wasn't even like a paraphrasing.
So is this just the answer to all of our problems?
Did you read the story or is that all you needed to know?
It's just part of a story.
I didn't get deeper, but I'm sure there's enough of these stories out there
for us to really believe it.
I'm only like five minutes away
from...
I'm only five minutes away from Tijuana,
so if I ever have a bad day,
I'm like, let's just fix this
right now.
Yeah, Tom, that was after
Sevan did 5x5 at 185.
Nice, dude.
CrossFit jokes.
You suck at deadlift, Savant.
I think I got you good, dude.
I fucking took you out of the knees.
I'm so weak it doesn't even matter.
I was going to try to defend it, but fine.
It was bad.
I've been training down at CrossFit Invictus down here,
and the women are bigger than the men it's terrifying there's a lot of attractive women there right there are
but everybody's married like it's it's like a it's like a incestual commune uh there's a girl
that we had on the show who's down there who was cool as shit devin kim did you meet her
yeah she's jacked i think she could probably snatch as much as me right now.
She's crazy cool. She's probably too young
for you. I don't even know how old
she is. I don't even talk to them.
It honestly feels like being in the zoo.
I walk in and I hope there's a pane of glass
between us. Like you're a giraffe and they're
rhinos and you should stay in your section.
I hope there's a pane of glass between us.
I'm like, if they catch on, then I'm here, dude.
They'll come over and beat the piss out of me.
Yeah.
Yeah, dude.
The girl in the middle is Chandler's wife.
Dude, she is jacked.
Hey, but she doesn't train there, does she?
She does.
They're down here right now.
Oh, so even Chandler Smith's down there.
Yeah.
I don't really see, like, it's interesting how to find, like when they show up crossfitters are also the
laziest creatures ever they're like turtles they like walk in like this and then you're like all
right it's starting at 9 30 and it's like 10 15 and they're still doing like iyt's and i go oh
yeah i'm gonna stretch it out and i'm like hey you guys some of us actually have lives
patra what about that guy we had had another guy, Jorge Fernandez.
He's a legend, dude.
I love that guy.
He's actually been training with me a fair amount.
He's just got a smile on his face all the time.
He's like a St. Bernard.
When he starts to work out, he just starts drooling like a dog does.
It's crazy.
Yeah, he's great, right?
Yeah, he's a really, really cool guy.
Love that.
And what about those two super hot chicks who train there?
They were at Guadalupalooza together.
I don't know.
One of them is Asian and one of them is white.
I think one of the girls is Asian.
There's Emily.
Emily is the Asian girl.
And then there's another girl like Stockwood or Waltzwood.
Yeah.
There's something wood in her name.
And she's so hot it's crazy.
But this other chick looks like she's hot like at 3 in the morning.
Like she's always hot, this blonde girl.
She's all natural and shit looking.
I don't know her.
Stallswood.
Do you know who I'm talking about, Azusa?
No, I'm trying to see if I can find a photo.
Stallswood, yeah. Lauren Stallswood. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's there too. know who i'm talking about um asuza no i'm trying to see if i could find a photo stalwood yeah
lauren stalwood yeah yeah yeah yeah she's there too oh you're in a good spot those white sisters
are there the britney and the yeah these chicks are so hot they're savages dude dangerous
they just come in like a bunch of Amazonians and just
fuck the barbells up.
I don't mean to make it weird by telling you that they're hot and then you have to train
there. Maybe I'll bring that back up after
you're done training. I have to wear three pairs of
pants every time I train there.
I don't know.
You gotta keep it strapped down.
How does that happen?
How do they all go to one gym at the same
time?
Well, dude, it's Southern California, first of all.
So it's beautiful here all the time.
And I think they just train in packs.
The best way to get better at something is to just be with other people that are pushing you.
So it's a really cool community.
They've got a good thing going on.
Everyone's pushing pretty hard.
So I'm a fan.
What are you going to do do why are you training there
well i'm down here in san diego there's not like a lot of gyms that just let you to like
walk in circles and take all their equipment drag it around wherever you want in the room
but how how does that work with your sprint canoeing why are you doing um well you still
have to you still have to develop like and you still have to develop power and have an engine
like so i'm always i think you're just working out to keep your body nice.
Tight.
Tight.
I'm serious.
Dude, my body from my back to my chest is so dense now.
If you poked me, your finger would probably fracture.
Oh, from rowing?
From rowing?
You're just reaching all the time and ripping.
So if you think about it, dude dude i'm doing thousands of repetitions every
single day of just push pull push pull and i've never like my friend hugged me yesterday he's
like what the fuck man like i i've never been this dense are you liking it i like it a lot
it's a lot of fun um lots of pt pt like uh what's pt uh? Yeah, to make sure you don't get all knotted up and shit.
I probably should, but I've actually just been doing a lot of yoga.
I started doing Pilates too.
Hot Pilates? You're doing hot Pilates?
No, but I wanted hot Pilates.
My wife does it. It's insane.
It's so crazy trendy, she said.
She said the class has 60 people in it.
Yeah, I know it is.
And she says it's the most beautiful people you've ever seen in Santa cruz all these girls just like they're like i'm like hey i
try pilates like do you want to do hot pilates i was like listen i suck at regular pilates i do
not want to go in a room where you cook my brain to make me do pilates but i haven't reached that
point yet i'm not that advanced yeah do it hot pilates yeah i'm still like the putt-putt course
of pilates what happened hunter with the guy that we had on the show with the million YouTube subscribers that you were partnering with and he was making a huge obstacle course that you were designing?
Susan, do you mind typing in Battle Bunker real quick?
Oh, yes, Battle Bunker.
And what was the guy's name?
That guy was cool as shit.
Alexander – oh, I don't have a pen.
I was going to write it down.
Austin Alexander?
Yeah.
You should go to Battlebunker.com basically we built
we built that thing we did
the whole website
we built the thing we did a course we did an event
year one now we built like a whole pipeline
we have a whole series that our
version of the open starts in April
then our regionals start in June and then we have our championship in October.
Yeah, so go to the pipeline.
Oh, the website's changed.
It's gotten nicer.
Not that it was ever bad.
Yeah.
Okay, so is this year one, 2023 is year one of Battle Bunker?
Technically, it's our first fully developed season.
And give me a – is it like High Rocks?
Is it like Spartan Race?
Is it like CrossFit?
Tell me what it – is it like Ninja?
So what we tried to do was basically merge my background and Austin's background.
Austin came
from the military and this dude is, you know, he was in the Navy for years and they started a
YouTube channel and he started to kind of do all the research on how to kind of be what it was like
to be in the life of a military guy. And then he started to branch out and he was like, what would
it be like if I want to train and get ready for the Navy SEALs? What would it be like if I trained
and got ready for the Rangers? So he built this whole channel of working with first responders and understanding the
way that they trained and lived to kind of do their tasks, accomplish their daily tasks.
And then he built this YouTube channel where he would test people in these workouts.
And he tested them themselves.
And it got really, really popular.
And then he was like, what's one of the pinnacle parts of military training is obstacle courses.
So he built a small obstacle course.
Then all of a sudden, we worked with the Olympic training center. Where did he build that at where did he build that obstacle course at in like a junkyard in simi valley it was hysterical i mean
it was really for him dude he rented out a whole like he rented out this humongous you know probably
30 to 50 acre field and built a whole course there. It was really incredible. Like I admire
the guy and that's why I partnered with him for even starting this process. And now we have a
course that's built and established down here in Chula Vista, which is at the most beautiful
training center in the country. But then what's the training center, Hunter? What's the training
center? Who's it for? It's called the elite training center. It used to be the Olympic
training center. Now it's the elite training center where athletes from around the world can
come rent the space and come do um you know come train there you know like you know you'll have the
entire czech republic or canadian canoe team come in you'll have the entire japanese track and field
come in it's crazy it's stroke season in um Canada, by the way. Stroke season?
Yeah.
It comes after flu season.
It's new this year.
I just covered it today.
They didn't know that there was a stroke season.
But this year is the first year that there's a stroke season that comes after flu season.
You didn't see that part of the show?
You were sleeping?
I was sleeping.
Yeah.
I'm excited to get some good rest.
Okay.
So he's partnered up. There's this world-class training facility in Chula Vista where people would just train anything, whether it would be just whatever.
So this is literally the start of the course being built, by the way.
And so you designed a course with this guy that is going to be the home of the bunker games.
Yeah, Battle Bunker.
Battle Bunker games.
Yep.
And have you done the course yet? Yeah you gonna win your own games it's like dave throws these shooting competitions and then he
takes first and his daughter takes second i'm not joking it's so fucked it's so fucked up no no no
i don't compete basically i built something so what we did was we came together and we decided
we were going to take these this like mindset lifestyle uh approach and also this sport
approach and bring
it together. And now we're at the point where the Open is very simple. Everybody has to be able to
do the Open. We don't want to have this extremely unique equipment and hard tasks. Everyone can do
the Open. The Regionals is obviously, you're going to get selected from all over the world to come to
the top three regions to be able to compete. That's going to be far more advanced.
That's going to be like a real challenge for these athletes to come into.
And then the championship level, which everybody really wants to get to, is going to be this CrossFit-esque experience where this is where the real test starts.
Now, we wanted to find the sport of the mixture of raw athleticism and competition and then then kind of this other test which is what's beyond the muscle there's another deeper layer of really an
intangible aspect and measurable aspect of a human being that we want to find and what we want to
encounter that's a military piece that kind of alex alexander well i guess you bring it to just
yeah so what's going to happen this is going to come out in greater detail is what there's going
to be called field day which is kind of like a typical day you'd see at the CrossFit Games or any of these major championships where you're in these massive fields.
There's reps, there's distance rounds, whatever you have to do, and it's very measurable.
grit day where grit day is really the thing that's going to be the most wild part and going to be most insane to film where we're taking these aspects of working with athletes and putting
them through the hardest level of mental and physical capabilities in some kind of military
ask uh you know task or revolution that's going to be insane that's what i'm like sitting here
drooling about i'm like this this summer is going to be insane. Explain that last piece to me again.
I was looking at it.
Andrew Hiller just sent me a text of something cool, and I stopped listening to you for 18 seconds.
It was maybe less, maybe 14 seconds.
It was in 14, 18 seconds.
It's one of these kind of things where we're in a time continuum, and it may be gone.
It may be gone forever.
Rewind the tape.
Do you understand that we're in a conversation within a conversation, so it's almost like interstellar where seconds here in this conversation are millions of years in other places?
So we're aged out now.
You fucked us.
No, I don't understand.
I want to be very clear.
I don't understand.
What's the mental piece going to be like after they do a sprint?
They have to play checkers against each other?
No, no, no, no, no. It's going going to obviously be something like i'll just give a hint right here
um i'll give you i'll give you like uh an experience that would be measurable but also
very hard to understand and train for unless you really were ready for it so like in negative
special warfare you ever seen where they tie people's hands behind their backs and they have to get across the pool to prove that they're capable in like hard situations in water to be able to accomplish a task?
Yeah.
Technically is not necessarily a race.
It's technically not necessarily like how long can you stay up for?
It's like, can you accomplish the task?
And, you know, just let's just say we use that as an example of the way we were competing.
If you don't complete it, you're rolled out.
Like you don't even get to get onto the next piece.
So you have to be a certain level of capable in some of these things that we're going to bring to you.
Otherwise you don't get to compete at the next level.
I was when you said that I started thinking of just like do you remember Brian Shantosh
did that thing where he ran
in a
conics container is that what those things
are called but basically one of those big steel
containers he ran on a treadmill for like
24 hours or some shit my friend competed
against him in that it was in Tahoe
yeah and they were okay what was your friend's name
his name's Isaiah Vidal
and they were just in the dark right
yeah he actually won the first season of Battle Bunker that's a hard dude Okay, what was your friend's name? His name's Isaiah Vidal. And they were just in the dark, right?
Yeah.
He actually won the first season of Battle Bunker.
That's a hard dude.
Shantosh or the – Isaiah.
Isaiah Vidal?
Yeah, the worst part about it is it was a pitch black container, and you had this thing, and they gave you the snacks and stuff that you needed, but they also gave you a bucket.
The snacks.
The snacks. a bucket like snacks the snacks to go poop in the corner and there's like video of isaiah
pooping in a bucket in the corner of this pitch black container it's fucked uh uh i want to be
very god my these people jeremy eat there's no there's no compassion for me just pure brutality
hey i have a guy drinking out of a fucking pineapple cup i can say anything
i want to be very clear seven kamala harris
i love school buses the electric ones the yellow ones i love a school bus a yellow electric school
bus school bus fantastic yellow that there's a whole kamala harris video where she's talking about how much she likes electric school buses good for her i did enjoy coming in uh late into your show yesterday and the video
of the guy eating the burger and the fries that that's some manipulative shit right there that
is just wait wait wait oh oh my god you get the the free burger and fries with your vaccine he's
like he's like, hey, Sandy.
Sandy, is it too early to enjoy fries right now?
Dude, that was the mayor of New York City, bro.
I know.
That is crazy, dude.
I was like, is this like SNL right now?
Because it seems like it's sketch comedy.
And I'm like, this is absolutely insane.
I can't fully understand why the hell this dude's doing this right now.
Sometimes I say shit on this show, and I'm like, oh, fuck, my kids are going to have to – they're going to have to one day be like, yeah, that was my dad.
But who's that?
Is that Brian?
Who's that?
Is that Brian Shantosh?
Who's that?
Oh, yeah.
He's in a container.
But once you see something like that, the mayor of New York trying to get people to take drugs with a French fry bribe, it's like, OK, you could say anything like like string together all the racist shit I've ever said and make try to paint me look bad.
And I'll take that over.
Hang the Jews.
Yes.
Before I try to get kids to trade drugs for French fries.
Sorry.
Like all that guy needs is a little a van
with a door that he slides open have you guys if you guys dive deep into what kanye west did when
he kind of did like the social suicide and the hitler the he likes hitler thing i would like to
sit down here and like maybe we should like eat like a bucket full of nootropics and some mushrooms
and then try to dig into all the content and see if we can find the similarities here and like maybe we should like eat like a bucket full of nootropics and some mushrooms and then try to dig into all the content
and see if we can find
the similarities here and catch what he was really
trying to do. Do you have any
idea what he was trying to do? I think he was just
trying to tank his, basically
tank all of his contracts so he can be free to do
whatever he's up to next. Oh really?
Okay, so calculated.
Dude, I think 100%.
Someone at that level is not that stupid to all of a sudden put himself in a position.
And also his managers, even though he may be like, hey, I'm fucking crazy.
If you're at that level, dude, your managers will get a hold of you and control you like a puppet.
Think about it.
Britney Spears is literally –
No, I don't.
I would 100% say so, dude.
He is tied to billions of dollars, and there's so many people that are tied into that, like armies of people supporting it.
There's no fucking way they would let an uncorked version of Kanye West go around town.
Dude, they put Britney Spears in whatever the heck the term was, but they put her into conservative shit for years.
You don't think that they could get a hold of Kanye if they wanted to and be like, hey listen he's off his pills right now we're not gonna let him talk because we don't
want him to hurt himself yeah that's all yeah yeah yeah i did uh trainer that trainer dude that was
like ex uh special whatever military guy that goes around and trains all the celebrities was the one
that suggested he like gets on his meds and then was the one saying, hey, you need to take these meds.
They planted that dude there to be his personal trainer.
I forget his name.
You know what I'm talking about?
I don't know.
I don't know.
But I think all these things- Can you imagine your trainer telling you to get on meds?
Dude, he was like-
Hold on, let me look it up.
Some of these guys can be very convincing.
And if you're just hanging out, getting all high, you're like just doing a little bit of a run.
You're like, man, I feel so good.
Maybe I should take my meds.
Boom.
He's trying to tell us in a real shitty way that the Jews have our country by the balls.
God, I wish that were true.
I wish the Jews didn't have it.
This is exciting.
Guys, I have 4% computer battery left on this thing.
I fucked up big time.
I left my charger at home.
But let's just talk this thing into the ground.
Okay.
I want to go back to Battle Bunker real quick because I like this thing.
So basically you're saying in April people can sign up.
If you're a CrossFitter, it's a great thing to sign up for because it's a great way just to use your fitness.
These knuckleheads are just looking for ways to use their fitness.
They have four days a week at their affiliate, three days a week at home, right?
Yeah.
So enter into the open you do at affiliate three days a week at home. Right. Yeah. So if you, so enter into the open, you do at home.
Open, you do at home. It's anybody could do it in any kind of gym. The equipment list is, you know, very limited. So it's not that crazy. And then the regionals good regional level,
you know, just imagine you've, you've been doing CrossFit for years. You understand going to the
regionals. Now you're in arena type events and there's going to be, are they all going to be
in Chula Vista? All the regionals? No, no, no.
None of the events are in Chula Vista until you reach the championship.
Oh, shit.
Wow, this is hard what you're doing.
This is crazy.
This is too ambitious.
Birmingham in the UK.
We've got one in Texas.
We've got one in North Carolina.
Too ambitious.
Too ambitious?
Yeah, it's too big.
It's too big.
You need to start small.
This is too big.
Yeah, but in reality, dude,, I've been doing this for years. At this point, it's just a formula. I'm not tired or exhausted by it, and the complications of it, it's not that difficult.
I did those two charity events, OCR Stars. That was fucking complicated. This is way easier, what we're setting up.
And honestly, man, I'm doing it because there's a hole in the space, like our space,
at least on our side, like CrossFit, I would say it did a really good job. And now there's somewhat
coming off, like kind of coming back down to earth. Our sport has never even had the chance
to really catch its wings and catch a good gust of wind because the people who are distributors
in our company just suck. So we're going to do it. We're going to make it media-based. We're
going to make the events extremely exciting, and we're going to provide a really good show and a really good season for athletes to compete in.
Spartan Race and Tough Mudder kind of just put themselves in a really tough position where they're on the verge of bankruptcy.
They're always changing what they're doing because they're always trying to catch a wind, which sucks. I'm not bashing them. I understand that they're trying. And athletes are always just losing more and more opportunities, at least in our side of the sport, to compete.
And the income, I would say, is dwindling quickly.
And then – so then it will go to the championships, and someone will be crowned, and then you'll start doing the next year?
Yeah. We'll take a big chunk of time off too.
And then what's going on with you and your, um, your, is your high rocks career
over? Are you done with high rocks? Um, recently, like literally 48 hours ago, I kind of just ended
up finding out that I got kicked in the nuts with my whole plan for paddling. Um, that's the,
canoe sprinting, sprinting canoe. Yeah. yeah yeah so i thought and was told that basically
that you could qualify points through the latter part of the season and there's all these
competitions that are already part of the structure of it all and i was like awesome i'm in on that
that's what i'm gonna show up and fuck shit up now i'm finding out 100 if you do not come number
one in the nation in april you don't even get to participate
in the rest of the season
so I'm like oh shit I found that out two days
ago so basically at this point
I may just put that on hold
and get back into competition
to the normal part of my season
because I'm not like for what for high rocks
high rocks go rock
whatever the heck it is
i may just i'm just going to pull the trigger and just start shooting okay um how is that emotionally
for you are you so so does that mean your olympic dreams are kind of over because olympics are every
four years i don't know because there's what's called the last chance qualifier which i could
participate in 2024 which would be the thing that i would have to aim for now but it basically means
the entire year of valuable competition that i was planning on doing now is off the table. So I sat there,
he told me like right as we were about to start four by 2000 meters, which is a hard fucking
workout. And I was like, I'm not going to say anything. And I'm just going to go do this
practice because if I, if I open up right now,'m gonna flip out and i went and did the practice and i fell in the water twice and i could already tell
i was like this is not a good practice like my mind's not in this at all and i was like oh fuck
because the sprint canoe balancing that thing is challenging as all get out it's ridiculously hard
um so i recognized right then and there i was like like, this is way worse than I'm leading on it to be.
And I'm not like a crier by any means.
Like if I wanted to cry, I would let it out.
But I just sat there and I was calculated.
I was like, this is – this ain't good.
Hunter is not a pussy.
Yeah.
So I just sat there and I was like – I went and I trained Invictus.
I went and hung out with the guys.
Did you cry?
Did you cry since this just happened the last 40 hours?
Did you go in your room and yell?
That's Sebastian Brendel.
That's the Olympian who's like the god.
Those are some of the people in the sport?
I thought it was like fat ladies you were going against.
They're all freaks.
So that's the Olympic gold medalist from 2016,
and the guy in 2021 is the guy to the left of him the
brazilian see your brother shred it up dude look at the size of that dude's head yeah dude they're
they're vikings they're very very they're very very fit big people yeah those dudes look ripped
this is what uh savon was imagining people kind of more look more like that guy doesn't
look as scary well i saw a video hunter like hunter paddled out to hawaii or something or
catalina and and i saw pictures of the team and i was very disappointed well you gotta understand
dude like one i was the worst person so they put me in the worst boat and also like that that sports
more for people to come together and train together this is like
the best people in the entire world at paddling all in one boat they're just those aren't those
are little girls right those are champions no those are not champions those are just kids
are the girls all huge and jack like that guy oh yeah there's a good oh the girls interestingly
enough look a lot like sprinters like they they have like – that's Nevin Harris.
So they have like big ass, big arms.
They're like thick.
Yeah, she looks thick.
She looks like a crossfitter.
She looks strong.
Yeah, she's a beast, dude. I paddled with her a couple times.
She just blows me out of the water.
So she's the Olympic gold medalist and the recent world champion.
All the men are very tall and long.
That makes sense.
And that thing doesn't want to stay up.
That thing just wants to roll over and go upside down it's impossible to bounce it it is so hard it's just crazy
okay and so so that might be on hold would you ever pivot to a different olympic sport now
is there anything else in that thing where you're like where you got some pictures up in your room
like your your war room and you're like okay i guess i'm gonna do pickleball curling
no dude i mean like listen i i had envisioned this whole thing and i had put it all together
because i was like i i know who i am as an athlete i know the kind of power i can put out the no i
know the kind of strength that i got i'm just gonna go for it and i had it all lined up and all of a sudden this just hit so i'm in reality dude
i do not want to be this there's i've watched sadly and this is going to hurt some people's
feelings but there's so many of these guys that are in their like late 30s early 40s they're kind
of just abandoning all the responsibilities in life and just coming out to chase these events
that they're never going to do good in they're're like, like, like 50 year olds who want to start a podcast career.
Yeah, basically. And I'm just like, I'm just like, I don't, I don't want to be that person.
I want to let go of it and then be able to step away and be like, that was a chapter of my life.
I'm not going to bring it into this one. Like I'm going to be done. So I want to be retired by like
35. How old are you? I'm 33.
What's the guy who's the second best high rocks dude in the world after you? 36.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
That's nice.
That's nice.
In endurance sports, you can keep on pushing it.
You can keep on pushing it, and you can like – dude, there's guys that are literally early 40s that are competing in like the Olympics and running.
So you can keep on pushing it, but I just don't really want to do that.
Like, I feel like I have other cool things going on.
So what do you think about grown men who wear like Marvel shirts?
Like this guy, Tyler's wearing a captain America shirt.
I feel like he has a sad existence.
I'll crush.
I crushed Tyler.
I crushed Hunter and pickleball.
Uh, that's the same guy that was hopping on the thread earlier when we were talking about
ejaculation that's the same person uh seven real quick is hunter and when is hunter fighting nick
bar uh is nick bars that giant guy who's like um has a supplement company right yeah are you
friends with him friendly for sure he's an incredible person. Very inspiring.
Awesome dude.
I think there's always just this level of competitiveness between us because he considers himself to be a hybrid athlete.
I consider myself to be a hybrid athlete.
Yeah.
This guy.
Is he on steroids?
I don't know.
I hope not.
That means you think he is, but you still want to be friends with him.
He's a thick dude.
Look at him.
Oh, he's so thick.
That's a big boy.
Yeah.
And he runs.
Look at.
We need Hunter.
We need Andrew Hiller.
Yep.
There it is.
He's got the shoulder thing.
Yes.
He's got your shoulder. Is that what you were going to say? He's there it is. He's got the shoulder thing. He's got the caps.
The thing is,
we got to have him.
He heard daddy or not.
It just registered right away.
The question is,
here's the thing I want to ask.
Here's the thing I want to ask, Andrew.
Those caps on the shoulders,
I think that you can get those um if you train specifically but it's hard to get that level
of muscle mass i mean dude if i take my shirt and shirt off my shoulders compared to my chest
are so different like it's not nearly like that but i'm not saying that's because he's on something
but you need to train shoulders really really hard to get that he owns a supplement company maybe he just gets like the first batch that has the good stuff
in it the contaminated batch dude his back is huge yeah he's a big dude i look at here's jeremy
world i look like that and i'm not on roids all right that's it that's cool that's cool that's
respectable all right okay dude you want to hear something cool we're going i will say i want to All right. That's cool. That's respectable. All right. Okay.
Dude, you want to hear something cool?
I want to say this before your battery runs out.
I want to say this.
Hunter did say, I spoke to Hunter yesterday, and I'm like, hey, dude, I need to call in a favor.
And he said, what?
And I said, I need you to come on the show.
I'm fucking in Tahoe.
I didn't book any guests.
I'm fucked.
I need you to carry the show.
He said, no problem, buddy. What time? I time i said 6 a.m he took a deep breath he said okay i can come on and he said so me and hillar not gary and i thought oh that's really sweet that
he's like that him and hillar i like i heard that like he just thought hillar was going to come on
i just thought that was nice i like it when my friends get along i just assume that he's always
like a part of the show i think think he's like a Susie.
He's hiding in the background.
He's like, ta-da!
Here I am!
Andrew Hiller, yes.
I've been here forever!
Yes, yes.
With my YouTube play, good shit.
But that kind of, I like, you know, you just like it when your friends get along.
I'm like, oh, okay.
Dude, we're going to this thing in Dubai called the Government Games,
where the government basically arranges all of the different chapters of government out there to compete in this really ridiculous kind
of like obstacle course where and challenge where i in dubai so we built this super team down here
in san diego so they're inviting they're uh they're inviting athletes from around the world
now to come compete against them and that's why i'm also training at invictus we've got this whole
group of dudes that okay start over again i want to hear this story tell it fast for your battery runs out
you got i'm kind of anxious because your battery's gonna run out what are you doing so you're gonna
have to google this but it's called the government games it's like this big it's almost like a tv
show almost like the titan games all these things they build all these crazy challenges for you to go take on as a six-person
team and it's usually exclusive to the government and the government parties in dubai now they're
inviting teams from around the world to come compete against them to see who's the best so
they're inviting all these crossfitters to come out and we have a super team out of San Diego, which is me.
It's Rasmus.
You ever heard of Rasmus?
Yeah, fuck.
I love him.
Will you tell him I said hi?
That's Lauren Fisher's dude, right?
He's so much fun. That dude's cool as shit.
That dude's the man.
I've been training with him a ton.
We were at run practice last night.
Wow.
Yeah, so we got this super team down here.
And, yeah, so, I mean, these pictures really don't describe what it is.
But, yeah, here we go hey
he's one of the coolest dudes i ever interviewed at the crossfit games i would have actually liked
to get to know him better he was down to earth yes yes okay and who anyone else i know any other
crossfitters i don't know if i'm allowed to say this they they already told me they're like oh
hunter is coming they told Rasmus this.
They're like, be careful with him.
He is crazy.
So I don't want to spike our team.
I don't want to spike our team.
So I'll just say that there's a lot of other big-name CrossFitters
that are going to go to this thing.
I'm going to say here are some guesses of mine.
Who's the guy?
Christian Harris.
Okay.
Sam Dancer.
Okay.
Not this
guy, but they should have this guy just for
shits and giggles. James Hobart.
It's going to be Masters
guys. They're going to pull from the Masters category.
Bunch of old burnt
out dudes.
You really want to be cross
games athletes but they just live in middle america they're just so miserable their lives
of teaching crossfit that i give you give them any opportunity whatsoever they will jump on a
flight and leave hey you know you know who i think is fucking capable is all get out who you might
want as kalipa kalipa's beast yeah i think he's supposed to be good untapped
source untapped rawest most capable person i've ever competed against in crossfit is the crossfit
cowboy sean sweeney yeah yep yep that very capable came came with us and did this like we did this
event in um in tahoe where we invited crossfitters versus ocr people and sean just did everything and never shut up
he just he just like never stopped it was never like uh oh i'm tired oh i can't do this he just
did it and i was like wow this guy refuses to die he uh he came out to the ranch once to demo uh to
test um workouts for dave yeah and he got injured and he tried to hide his injury.
Good for him.
Yeah.
Cause you want to go home.
Yeah.
He didn't.
Yeah.
He didn't.
He's like,
no,
I come good.
I'm good.
She's just like bleeding.
It was bad.
No,
it was worse than bleeding.
It was worse than bleeding.
He's bleeding out of his ear.
He's like,
I'm fine.
He's like,
I'm good.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Hepner would be good too.
God,
you and Hepner would be great on a team together.
We made a super team years ago, and then all of a sudden COVID shut it down, so Hefner was on my team.
Yeah.
Oh, Kasper Bauer.
Holy shit.
So capable.
Do you know who that is, Hunter?
Yeah.
Kyle Kasper Bauer?
He came and competed against us in a couple Spartan-style events.
And a good dude, too.
Yeah, he's ripped.
Yeah, and just a real dude
yeah he's cool
okay so you're going to Dubai
should I check on you regularly
or are you over this whole
this canoe thing should I check on you regularly
yeah call me all the time
no this isn't the kind of thing
you're not in Kanye headspace are you
you're not going to start saying you like Hitler
no but
you know I knew it was a
stretch to make this whole thing oh sorry sorry one thing not bridges bridges is just a pretty
face now love josh bridges go to the josh bridges training camp but he's not his he's just a pretty
face i mean he's he's just he can't you can't put any more miles on that car he's like the ferrari
that sits in your garage you don't put miles on you'd only take it out sometimes and even it's like yeah fourth of july parade
shit that's it goes slow yeah i can't go up that road dude it's too dangerous i can't go up the
steep hill i used to see him run up anymore they don't make the paint to fix that ferrari anymore
so he can't take it out and get any chips in it you know what i mean is he that is he that
fucked up no no no he's in he's still his body looks beautiful he looks in great
shape but he's he's got miles on dude dude you know what's crazy i just heard the other day
he's the third most he is the third most first place wins ever at the crossfit games in the
men's division and he's a little dude and he was a navy seal and he's got some bunch of surgeries
on him he's still training hard his body it, but I don't think he belongs.
No, he can't. Can't get in the deep end of the pool?
I wouldn't recommend it for him if I was him.
I mean, he's...
You can blow a kneecap or an elbow at any time.
Just stick to the Legends event at Rogue.
Dude, that's what I'm saying. That's why I want to let go.
There's going to be a certain point in time where I just
will be like, I'm done.
You're going to have a patch of hair missing in your fro. What happened to Andre?, I'm done because I don't want to be that beat up. You're going to have a patch of hair missing in your throat.
What happened to Hunter?
He's always stressed.
I don't want to be that guy who's showing up to events and everyone's like, yeah, Hunter shouldn't be here.
Hunter shouldn't be here.
And he doesn't know.
He doesn't know.
No one's got the heart to tell him.
Just let him show up.
Yeah.
Bridges was a seal for sure held together by bitterness and duct tape.
Yeah, just he's so successful in everything he does
that's a man
he's a man there's no doubt
his camp still looks like they're killing it he just did one I think
yeah
so
going back I derailed us
so
so
I should call you every day because
you're still processing?
When it dies, I'm just going to switch over to phone.
Okay.
It's our only option.
Okay, so I should call you every day to make sure that you're not – you're in a good headspace while you make this kind of Barry put to sleep your Olympic dreams.
You're considering pivoting to High Rocks, but there's also just some shit going on in Dubai that you may have to go over and handle.
The dubs.
Yeah.
The dubs.
Well, they're going to just throw money at us.
I'm going to go over there.
I don't know if I'm allowed to say certain things without getting in trouble, but I plan on just burying them.
They've never seen an American stallion on that soil before, and it's dangerous when I show up.
These guys are like, oh, we're going to put together a puddle.
I'm going to ram through the
wall and just destroy these people.
Just give me the chance,
dude. They're fucking dead.
Daniel Garrity,
Sebon has vaginitis that we have to hear
him complaining about every day on this podcast
in his elbow, and yet he can still
rip on bridges.
All right, fine. My elbow hurts. I'm a bitch.
Fine. You're right.
You're not competing or anything or trying to show up.
Can you guys tell me about the scale of your guys' success?
I'm so proud of you guys.
You built this thing up from like a hobo show to now you guys are like on Alex Jones level where it's like very controversial and makes no fucking sense.
But we can't stop watching.
We've only just begun.
The fact that I'm always talking to you and you're always in random places filming the show shows a level of excitement too.
It means that you're doing something right enough that people are allowing you into their homes.
Well, there's just no way in hell – so a couple weeks ago, Hunter. I, well, let me ask you this.
Do you ever just say, okay, I'm going to take two weeks off of training.
Like, do you ever tell yourself, okay, I'm going to do nothing for two weeks.
I'm just going to go up to my cabin and I'm going to bring a girl up there and just, just
cover her and baby batter and just chill, watch movies and hang out.
No, I don't.
But you know what I have done that's changed my life is I go backpacking
and I just walk. And when you don't have electronics around you at all and you just
walk and you're in nature, dude, by the time you get out of there, you feel like you had like 100
therapy appointments and you're walking on ecstasy. And how long will you go backpacking for?
Like three to five days. Oh, okay. Three to five days, sometimes seven days.
We haven't gone further than that. So about a month ago, I told Sousa, I was like, hey, dude, I think I'm going to Tahoe.
And I do not like to leave my house.
I said I'm going to Tahoe for four days because I have this crazy opportunity to let my kids get access to this skate, indoor skate place that's supposed to be this shit, right?
So we've been going there the last couple of days.
And so I'm like, so I don't think I'm going to be able to do the – bye, Hunter.
Uh-oh.
Step one of the.
Baby batter.
Baby batter.
Is that what he said?
Baby batter.
Life force.
Yes, life force.
I wanted you to hear, I wanted you to tell this story,
so that way I could, we could unravel this.
Call her. Call her. Hi. this story so that way I could we could unravel this caller hi
caller hi
hey Siobhan
hi
first time caller
hi very nice to hear your voice
I've been thinking a lot about you
welcome
thank you
I like you too Susie you're fine
I'm fine or fun
both thank you I like you too, Susie. You're fine I'm fine or fun?
Both Wow, thank you
You're fine
Don't say anything. We have a girl caller. This is a very rare incident
Don't fuck this up, Hunter
Hold my breath
I was waiting for Hunter's shit to die
so that I could call you
Good, perfect. I appreciate that
Hey, that shows a high level of social awareness
situational and social awareness shows a high level of social awareness,
situational and social awareness. That's high level shit. Once again, proving me wrong. I never think women have that kind of stuff. And you're just fucking changing my paradigm
of how life works. Thank you. Glad I'm one of the few.
So the reason I'm calling is because I am the daughter of the guy in the CEO shirt next to Dave.
Oh, yeah.
We got to get that guy.
Yeah, I've been DMing with you.
What's your name, Jessica?
I'm Mabel.
Mabel.
Oh, and what's the name?
I don't have a pen or pencil or anything.
What's the name of his gym?
I got it.
His gym is CrossFit Glynco, G-L-Y-N-C-O of Southeast Georgia.
Gossett Glinko, G-L-Y-N-C-O of Southeast Georgia.
And I wanted to get him on Glinko.
What did he think?
Did he say?
Is that the first time he's met Dave?
No, he's actually met Dave twice now.
And does he like meeting him?
Yeah.
I mean, Dave never remembers it, but he remembers it.
Look how distinguished your dad looks. He looks hard as fuck's a tough looking guy yeah he looks like a he looks like a model like um
on his boot at all times i feel like he's one of those kind of guys
he's one of what kind of guys keeps a pistol in his boot if he wears
camo socks yeah he's intense he goes into the gym like an hour early every day and just busts out as many
unbroken ring muscle ups as he can before coaching.
Oh,
that's a guy who's after my heart.
Okay.
So I texted,
I DM the gym and I said,
um,
what's your dad's name?
Is it Justin?
It's Justin.
And I'm actually in charge of the social media for our gym.
So you've just been messaging me. Oh, your name's Maria mabel mabel so that was my mom actually that one time that
oh okay how did you want i've been messaging you on my personal and i've been responding as well on
the affiliate page okay so this phone number here this 912 number is that that his? The one that I sent you, it is. Okay. I'm going to screenshot this DM, and I'm going to send it over to Sousa,
and I'm going to have Sousa set up a three-way thread with your dad, Justin, and I,
and see if we can schedule him for a podcast.
This is so awesome.
Thank you.
Yeah, of course.
I figured I'd have to call in to get your attention. yeah thank you because shit just gets lost so easy and and then so does
he know is he gonna think it's weird when suza uh text him in a three-way with me and was like hey
can we schedule you for a podcast no he's totally about it but he doesn't he doesn't want to be the
person to reach out yeah perfect i appreciate that respect that. You like me more now. Right. He's cool. I'm going to love him.
Yeah. What's the what's tell me what are some of the oh, he looks like a Paul Mitchell model, doesn't he?
Like like that haircut is like you walk in a supercut and there's a giant poster of it on the wall.
Does not look like like does not look like he. Right. Yeah. Can you see it?
And I'd be like, oh, yeah, can I get my haircut like that?
Would you like the same product in your hair?
Oh, yeah, sure.
He takes pride in the salt and pepper.
Yeah, it's nice.
How old is your dad?
He just turned 41 this week.
How old are you?
21.
Oh my goodness.
Oh my goodness.
And he's still with your mom?
He is. They had me in high school. Wow.'s still with your mom? He is.
They had me in high school.
Wow.
That's going to be a good story.
Wow.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
Hunter doesn't even have pubic hair as long as your dad's relationship with your mom.
And I walked into the room and just heard this big gasping wow dude this guy's
this guy's this guy's a 20 year old kid and he's still married to his wife and he's only 41
that's rad dude i think goals yeah it's just completely wrecking um wrecking the design of
probably relationships as soon as you're there's got to be some kind of study
once your capacity of social circle
reaches a certain bubble size,
that that's when the depth of relationship
starts to really fall apart.
Because you only have so much capacity
to share yourself with people
and then eventually you reach the ceiling of it
and the depth of relationships around you
start to fall apart.
So you're saying that once you have – let's say if you have five friends – oh, it's like direct reports in business.
Once you have more than six direct reports, the business starts to suffer?
Yeah, I guess.
You reading me, Goose?
Gotcha. Sounds great.
I have to go anyway.
Is Mabel still on the phone?
I am. I can hang up though.
No, no. I was just reminding our host that we still have a go anyway. Is Mabel still on the phone? I am. I can hang up, though. No, no.
I was just reminding our host that we still have a caller here.
See how subtle he is?
He's not like, hey, jackass, there's someone on the call.
He's just like, oh, Mabel.
Well, thank you, Mabel, for calling.
I appreciate it.
Nice meeting you, Mabel.
I want to hang out with your dad.
My grandma came with Mabel. That's the first. My grandma's name was Mabel.
That's the first time I've ever met another Mabel.
What do you think the oldest name in the book is?
Like, what's the name?
Like, have you met, like, an old lady,
and you're like, that's the oldest name there is?
Did I ever send you a CEO shirt, Hunter?
No, it's because you're a cheap shit.
No, I need to.
Even if I am a cheap shit. You're a cheap shit. I'll to even if i am a cheap shit cheap shit i'll put it
i have to go you gotta go do kid stuff yeah i sent andrew a link to see if he would come on
every time i try to reach out to hiller he doesn't respond to anything and then he tells me he's got
like all of these like layers of blocks on his phone so that no one can get a hold of him so he can stay super focused all day that is true he hasn't like do not
disturb a hundred percent of the time what is he doing all day uh defining people shit to troll and
fucked him up going going and boiling noble shoes and then cooking them on a grill. This is like, honestly, this is the top of what CrossFitters are at.
That's the peak human performance CrossFitter taking TRT and blogging about boiling shoes.
Oh, could he enter your comp?
Oh, there he is.
Oh, shit.
Look it.
Look it.
We spoke too loud.
Look it.
We talked that shit and there he is.
Look at that hillbilly. Hell, we were just talking shit about you. Oh, there he. Look at him. We talked that shit, and there he is. Look at that hillbilly.
Hello, we were just talking shit about you.
Oh, there he is.
Got him.
His connection's ass.
Yeah.
No, I can't.
Hey, can Hunter enter your battle bunker, Juice, to the gills?
I don't know if we're going to drug test.
Probably at the highest level, we'll drug test.
But you could just crush the open and everything.
I'm not going to send everybody a peek up.
Fair.
I can't hear you.
This is such a good conversation, Hiller.
Hiller, we can't hear you.
It doesn't say you're muted, but for some reason your mic's all jacked up.
I don't think Hiller actually has one of those fancy Jeeps.
I think he just uses that as a virtual background,
and he actually drives a Chevy Volt because he's a pussy.
What's wrong with the Chevy Volt?
Now you're muted, Hillary.
Now you're muted.
Now you're muted.
Let me see.
Can I unmute you?
I bet you drive a Prius.
I actually drove a Prius, and I hit a deer that was the size of a cat, and it totaled the car.
That's how pathetic those things are.
Oh, I like how you have light now.
Okay, so what story was I telling?
I forget the story I was telling.
It was about you not doing podcasts, but now we're doing
one every day. Yeah, so I wasn't going to do the show
and then I got up here
and I just can't not do it. I just have to do it.
I just feel like
I'm... Yeah, you sound'm... You have a really deep voice
like you're an enhanced human.
I am an enhanced human.
You have a filter on, dude.
Your voice sounds like mahogany now.
Is that part of the TRT?
That's what I've been told, at least.
Dude, you have like a chestnut
rattled voice now.
I wonder what it is.
You know what it is?
I did 100 burpees this morning, and I think it's still sitting in there.
On top of a bottle of TRT?
So it's just seeping through your pores?
Taylor, we lost your camera.
And your looks are kind of your best part.
Oh, give me two seconds.
Oh.
What would you say the biggest perks of doing this stuff is like,
what's your, what's your sex life? Like, do you sleep better?
Is it longer?
Yes. It's well, I last longer, which is nice.
Wow. Hey, there's some honesty. Wow.
Not that it wasn't anything crazy short before, but it's totally longer.
And it's like, wow, it's like a five-minute AMRAP to a seven-minute AMRAP.
It depends on how long we would go between.
We can barely hear you, Hiller.
What happened?
That's part of the story.
You got to lean in.
Yeah, what's going on?
Tell us how you're doing.
Sorry, I'm driving.
I'm out of my element.
There's a whole lot of crap.
It's the semen clogging his mic port on his cell phone. All right, I'm driving. I'm out of my element. It's the semen clogging his mic port
on his cell phone.
Alright, I'm back.
If it had been a little while
I would be
assured in like two minutes.
I'd be like, oh fuck, let's go again.
Wait, wait, you would say that?
Let's go again?
Yes.
I always say, is there milk in the fridge?
I'm out of peanut butter and jelly. Am I unique in that where it's like you look for is there milk in the fridge i'm out of peanut butter and jelly am i unique in that where it's like you can just keep on going i'm sure hunter you can do that right and
suza like that's not abnormal i got other shit to do like get on
get on a podcast with my boys and talk about other people's dicks
shut up babe i'm done making love to you i gotta talk to the boys my boys and talk about other people's dicks.
Shut up, babe. I'm done making love to you. I got to talk to the boys.
But that does, I know, honestly,
that does concern me if you can go longer because it makes me think maybe you got, it's got desensitized.
No, it's great the whole time.
Did your nuts go from this to this? What are we talking about?
They're small.
Yeah. Yeah.
Well, coin purse.
Your nuts used to be so big, I used to love them.
And now they're not that big.
You got that little coin purse you're walking around town with.
From cornish to dimes.
You got a couple pennies dingling.
They make another substance called HCG, which is supposed to increase the size of your nut sack again. And also it's supposed to increase the amount of testosterone they produce in
unison with the testosterone you're taking.
But it's one of those where there's also a side effect to everything you take.
This is what I needed at 7 a.m.
I was like, Hunter, how are we going to start this day off right?
Testicle sack cream.
Testicle sack cream that will enlarge the volume of your already volume of sack
let's just be honest here how many of you guys are banging the bar with your dingus every time
you do snatches and cleans never is that is that poor form or am i just am i just hung like a horse
maybe it's where your penis is mounted. Maybe it's mounted like
too high up or something.
You're telling me that the outlets
is off.
That's it.
I gotta talk to God
about this. I'm like, you built my cocks
and you mounted closer to your anus
and further from your belly button.
Under Granite Games 2018,
you and I warmed up with one another on a snatch bar.
Did we rip it?
You were banging the bar off your dingus.
Dang right, dude.
You remember that?
You remember that, Hiller?
Fuck yeah, I remember everything.
That's awesome, dude.
I never said that I was good,
but dude, you got to understand
that extra lift comes off the tip.
You got to understand, dude.
Imagine remembering warming up with you and being like,
wow, that dude really fucking pulls the bar hard against his cock and balls.
Four years ago, Hiller is a steel trap, that brain.
He's an elephant.
The other thing I remember was you were running a bench with your team.
You would run way the fuck ahead of everybody
and then say hey to the winner
or the leader of the match.
You'd run back to your team and say,
come on, guys, and then you'd run back to the front.
I was just there to fuck with them.
I was like, I'm going to get them to break mentally.
I was going to get them to break mentally.
That was actually a really fun competition.
Yeah, dude, when I used to snatch,
my penis looked like a leper.
It was like it just had spots all over it from just impact.
Heavy impact.
Oh, yeah.
It was awful, dude.
Just blood blisters up and down the whole thing.
But it's like Wolverine.
One time I was playing paintball, and I got shot in the tip of my penis.
I blacked out, and I woke up crying.
And I take it out, and it looked like it got hit with a hammer.
It was all red and all different red and purple and dark.
Two hours later, absolutely normal.
Hey, the penis is remarkable in its healing capabilities.
And I also appreciate the way you said you took it out.
A hundred percent, dude.
I had to unravel it.
I had to dig down into my treasure chest and take it out.
Like it was like a, like a rare saber.
You just don't, you don't, you don't stop, dude. to my treasure chest and take it out like it was like a rare saber. What's it like next when it's all beat up like that?
You just don't stop, dude.
I'm a trooper.
Are you kidding me, dude?
This is a day-to-day action.
Is Alexis complaining that it got too big?
Well, it gets
bigger. It's not like crazy
bigger. I think there's more blood in there.
Yeah, yeah.
It's noticeably bigger, but it's not like crazy bigger i think there's more blood in there yeah yeah it's so it's noticeably bigger but it's nothing insane that lasts longer and it's all good stuff
if you guys if you guys like are you bottoming out are you hitting the sir sorry sorry i got
questions hunter sorry are you hitting like the cervix or whatever that thing is in there?
Yeah, it was back there.
Gone where no man's gone before.
I'll just say yes.
Wow, okay.
They don't like that.
They don't like that part.
If you guys want to get really into it, just take a bunch of citrulline before you have it.
It's a big blood flow.
Boom.
It's like cheap Viagra.
You don't have to get a prescription.
She'll be too pissed pissed off she won't be
upset with me saying is it just depends on kind of the spot she's in there's certain yeah it's
like you can't go there because it hits something back like downward dog upward cat the cervix yeah
and i'm like those are the best what do you mean we can't go there anymore
i uh so what happens what happens to you like that okay my bad my bad well so what happens what happens what happens when you get off
this stuff
what's gonna happen
to you
have you
have we talked
through that at all
like what happens
when you no longer
are Batman
and you're just
Bruce Wayne
what happens
when you get off
the sauce
and you're just
a normal ass dude
I was just
talking with somebody
I was just
talking with somebody who's going through that and it's probably the toughest on your mental aspect of life because testosterone is what drives you.
It makes you want to work out.
It makes you want to do things in general, and you'll also be shrinking, which is going to crush the way that you view yourself.
You've been growing and doing great for so long and now it's all going away.
So are you a lifer now?
You're a lifer.
That's part of it, at least in my eyes right now, unless I have to.
You could just move down to Costa Rica
and pick papayas and stuff and try to find
Jesus.
Did we lose our connection?
No, I'm private chatting.
I think I've always heard Sevan say he doesn't want to get on it.
He doesn't want to be.
Whatever.
No, no, go ahead.
I don't want to get on it because I don't want to have to just do it every single day.
I don't want to have to do anything every single day.
That's it.
It's all good, dude.
And what happens if it just goes away?
Oh, like if they make it illegal?
Like if they make TRT illegal and you're on it
right or what happens if the world shuts down and there's no supply chain of it you can't get
a hold of it just chop timber in the woods and become a man uh hunter did you know that um
i want to switch subjects here real quick did you you know that the lobotomy was a surgical procedure for mental ailments, like if you were insane?
Yeah, I liked it.
And then you know that they outlawed that shit, right?
You can't cut open the front of someone's skull and take a butter knife and mash the front of it.
That's basically what they did.
Yeah, but dude, it's a trial and error game.
You got to figure that shit out.
game you got to figure that shit out and so so since then i don't think there have been any other uh procedures uh surgical procedures for psychiatric issues it's either like
now they switch to giving you pills right yeah but you know what they're starting to really
figure out is mushrooms are changing the psychological um you know the psychological
response to all these people hey that's another. I think those people who take that route are making a mistake if they don't try some other shit first.
You mean like taking pills?
No, like even mushrooms.
Like you're going to take ayahuasca to fix some sort of problem?
Have you ever been on a camping trip for five days by yourself?
Yeah, I know.
But you know people don't want to do that shit.
They don't want to actually ever solve the issue. They want to they want to live with the issue and then put
band-aids on top i i i hear you i i hear you like like how is it that you're taking mushrooms
but you've never spent 24 hours alone
that's what that backpacking trip was though i told you that yeah yeah yeah oh yeah i'm not
critiquing you i'm just giving people a um yeah like like sarah cox says just don't go off of it
yeah totally just don't go off of it i agree i have to get a house being driven on the road
yeah yeah those are awesome all right well there's one behind me. It freaked me out.
Hiller's very sheltered.
Hiller, do you live in your garage all day long,
and this is the first time you've seen society in a while?
Yeah, man, this is weird.
I'm in Texas.
Why are you in Texas?
Oh, shit, you're going to your meeting?
I'm leaving the meeting.
Oh, shit, I can't wait to talk to you what are you doing
what are you doing
in Texas
it was cool
it was awesome it was super cool
I told Travis I was going to see Rogan
and he didn't believe me
oh that is so awesome
you can tell look at
he's got a smile that won't leave his face
I'm not talking about it.
Hunter, I'll tell you off the air.
We'll tell you off the air.
I'm sure everyone's going to find out sooner or later.
I pieced it together.
Right.
I'm like a fucking detective.
Oh, you.
Oh, freaking Sousa.
I have no clue what you guys are talking about.
Let's just say CrossFit doesn't want to hire me.
And they're stupid.
about but let's just say crossfit doesn't want to hire me and they're stupid so you just you just went down there to go apply with them no no
no oh that is so fucking good okay i have to go uh can you can you host these guys
whatever you want to do i'm out dude i'll just i just want to come and say hi to you guys i'm
gonna go train anyways okay you're a good dude. I just want to come and say hi to you guys. I'm going to go train anyways.
Okay, you're a good dude. I love you.
I'm going to call you later, guys. See ya.
Hey, thanks for getting up so early. Okay, bye.
Bye.
Man.
I have to go.
I want to go. I have to go. I need to go.
I should go. I'm going to go get ready.
By the way, this is the first time I've ever done a show without
pants on. I have long johns on.
That's good. That's good flexibility.
Can you stand up?
Thank you. I'm very flexible.
And look, Hunter just texted me. Call me.
Did you see the pictures I sent you from earlier today?
I did see those. That shirt's cool. see those that shirt's cool where's that shirt
from it's from a place called sisu it's a gym i dropped in this morning uh the owner of the gym
which i'm not 100 sure whether or not it's an affiliate but i think it may be he has a quote
of yours on his whiteboard i sent you that too he heard you say and it's on the top left corner
of his whiteboard i thought that was cool yeah i know that that guy uh i don't want to
say his name because oh yeah yeah yeah alan's awesome yeah i love him as i'm saying it no not
that guy's name but in the picture you said there's a picture of another guy's name that i
don't want to say because i don't want to give away what you were doing but his name is in that
picture on the board ro Roger. Roger that.
But yeah, that one's super cool.
The gym was cool.
And it was cool that there was a quote of yours just sitting out there.
I go, holy hell, he's got to see this.
Do you remember what it was off the top of your head?
Because I do.
I just paraphrase.
Anything you don't want...
Saying you don't want to get fit
or get too big bulky by working out is like saying you don't want to get rich or get too big bulky by working out
is like saying you don't want to get rich
from having worked a job
I don't remember saying that but it sounds like something I'd say
that's a good quote
and we lost him
okay Hiller I'm going to call you later
I'm going to get my kids dressed and head over to the
ski slopes here
I'm headed over to Boreal, and then I'll start calling you guys.
You guys, thank you so much for dealing with all of this chaos as we're on the road.
Thanks, everyone, to Sousa and Hunter McIntyre for getting up early.
Hiller, thanks for calling on the last minute.
Patrick Anderson, you are a gem of a man, of course.
Bruce Wayne, you're the best.
Christine Young, Young Heidi Trish
all you guys
Eric bye
you have a great day too Eric
AJOM13
you're very welcome for anything I did
thanks Steve Jessica
see you guys tomorrow morning
we don't know what time yet
but it'll be scheduled and up soon
alright
bye