The Sevan Podcast - Alexis Raptis | 6th Fittest Woman on EARTH #1033
Episode Date: October 6, 2023Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
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TD.
Ready for you
bam we're live
uh-oh uh-oh what is this oh no she uh
ah good morning scratchy scratchy throat I noticed it a couple days ago.
Ah, the Burby dude.
What's up, dude?
Eaton Beaver, what's up?
Taylor Beaver, what's up?
Good morning.
Hey, I sent you the notes with no links,
but there's a funny comment I want to ask her about
that's in her post that Cooper March made.
Okay.
We'll probably need that post.
Dude.
She's doing the tour.
The tour.
Seriously.
Uh,
Brian's been then here and then,
uh,
over to,
uh,
Pedro,
Pedro.
What is colitis?
Does that mean like she's shitting her pants and stuff?
I think so.
To an extent.
Like, does it change the viscosity?
Does it change the, the, it does.
Yeah.
A little bit.
That's why no one wants to talk about it.
No one's talking about just in general.
Nobody likes talking about poop.
I understand.
Dude.
Crazy.
I, um, Ari, uh, you know, my son got his cast off oh he did yeah it was crazy hot here
yesterday and uh he he wanted to take so he got his cast off so he's been taking baths now and
he's so happy he's been taking like two baths a day he's like i'm taking another bath i'm like
yeah dude so he just lays there he brings his toys into the bathtub and he just lays there and
he just talks to himself and sings and he's just like he's in heaven we got a big bathtub and so then afterwards i um while he
was in the bath i took these uh really soft like pat yoga pads like they're not really yoga pads
they're from tumble track they're really thick and i and uh and they have like uh material on
them like fur so they're really comfortable and nice to lay
on and i put them out on the skateboard ramp where it's hot as shit and i put three of them
and then i took them from the bath and i put them on those on those mats just in the scorching sun
on the skateboard ramp and i laid out there with them you know like for 10 minutes and i can tell
dude my skin turned red a little dark yeah oh good dark okay i didn't turn red good okay i
feel like i look a little redder than yesterday i was like wow i got some sun out there with them
they'll turn to a tan no worries good thank you so you're you're a nurse too you know stuff you're
a medical professional yeah yeah i know stuff beaver do you have time to do the shattuck and
go to school yeah okay for sure i don't mean to
take a lot of your mom or your dad i'm just wondering no no there's plenty of time it does
it takes a little bit of extra work but uh it's totally doable is your wife living with your
parents now too no she's still back in virginia oh oh like tying up loose ends and shit? Basically, yeah.
Why did you come without her?
My new orders
required me to be here
on a certain date.
So I needed to show up
and in process with my new unit
and shake hands with everybody
and then I can do whatever I want basically until the next month.
Even though you're in the national guard.
Yeah.
So they,
they,
I had to,
so I had a separation date,
which was one October and then there's no like gap in service is what they
call it.
So I had to show up the next day after my separation date to swear into the
guard.
Is it a pay cut? Significant significant do you have a senior position there since you already like been playing
no i even when i was playing i was pretty low level how many years is the commitment
uh technically it's six years but it's like just one weekend a month for six years for six years gotcha yeah
but you could stay in longer yeah i could totally do that um does it go to how long were you in
the air force four years four years did you think about staying longer
yeah not really after i came back from deployment that's a great answer by the way
yeah not really yeah when i came back from deployment i started working back in another
clinic and i just couldn't uh i don't know i just had a hard time adjusting back to like
regular active duty military life because being deployed is completely different you just
everybody's a family and everybody's looking out for each other and like everybody's taking care
of each other but then as soon as you get back stateside nobody really cares they just keep
pushing and don't if you fall off you fall off kind of thing so i didn't really care for that
it would be it would be awesome if we can make this a podcast,
a profession.
Yeah,
that would be fantastic.
I was in this rush to get out of this space and now I'm like immersed in it
even more than ever.
I was,
it was talking to Andrew about it yesterday.
I was like,
Holy shit.
Like I'm doubling and tripling down on the space.
Like CrossFit.
Yeah.
Like,
like I don't even like,
like I, for, I went went from i want to only do
500 shows to okay i'm just going to leverage the crossfit community to get out of the space to like
now i'm just like just steep just just steeped in it cornerstone of it like yeah it's like it's
it's about it's about to be like
i really am about to become the ceo like it like i'm like it's i'm it's like quicksand every time
i try to get out i get i sink in even deeper there is no but i've surrendered to it i'm not
even trying to get out anymore i'm like fuck you i'm taking it like taking over but i do think that
we could accidentally get out of it anyway i don't know
if i'm lying to myself but like we're gonna come out the other side don't go in the black hole
don't go in the black hole fuck we'll just go in and come out the other side yeah pretty much i
mean we can do anything and from disc golf to fucking arm wrestling it's there's anything you
could think of well we can talk about it we can research it
we can do it better than anybody else
I was
reflecting
and by the way that's why we're such a good team
we're both delusional I love that
I was reflecting
on yesterday's podcast and I was like
what were the
highlights of it
and I thought the highlights were talking to
Facundo about whether his husband's jealous.
Did Scott Panchik and Brooke leave or were they asked to leave?
And then the hog talk about Uldis.
Because I wanted to talk about his hog before, but I didn't i was scared like like someone was going to report me to hq and we were going to not be
allowed to do the behind the scenes if i talked about how giant his dong was right that's how
scared i was scared is not the right word uh but um the reason why i was reflecting as i watched
that mr beast video did you by any chance watch that? Yeah, I watched it as well.
Yeah.
And it's kind of like that.
I don't know what my takeaway from there was, but I watched like 10.
It's like just a, for you guys don't know,
there was this Mr. Beast video I sent Caleb and it's like just a 10 minute
compilation of just advice from him.
And even though I'm not, I don't know what category I put him in,
but man, I was so motivated. It's so crazy. Cause I didn't know what category I put him in, but man, I was so motivated.
It's so crazy because I didn't want to watch.
I had some like resistance to watching it and I'm like, fuck it.
I'm going to watch it anyway.
And it was so good.
It did me so good.
His advice.
And I was just motivated when I came out the other side of that.
I was like, all right, all right.
There's a lot of good tidbits in there.
And I think a lot of what he's saying is a reflection of what we're doing already
like we have a massive group of friends that we can bounce ideas off of everybody's
doing the same thing and their own version of it and telling everybody else how to do it better
like we're all critiquing each other we're all talking shit and like all of that is growth that
that's interesting so we do have that group right of the
obsessed people i was also thinking too like he says don't he basically says don't use clickbait
always over promise someone clickbaited us with rap this thumbnail goddess no come on i don't i
try i don't clickbait i just still think she's coming and um uh oh i think Oldest is Hogs is called Mr. Beast.
Fair.
But also, the reason why I was reflecting on those,
I think that those three pieces that I mentioned fall under that Mr.
Like, push.
Athlete interviews, CrossFit interviews and athlete interviews are just kind of boring.
They're just kind of dead. So the interview has to be pushed right like into some
how how's how are brian and facundo and i gonna react to seeing the outline of the giant penis
how how is the audience gonna you know you don't you don't hear um the the nuance of the fact that
facundo is gay and that his husband might be jealous that's a nuance you don't hear the nuance of the fact that Facundo is gay and that his husband might be jealous.
That's a nuance you don't hear talked about too often.
And then another perspective on the intensity because Tia obviously is the greatest to ever do it.
And now we're talking about her camp where people kicked out or not kicked out.
I don't know.
I was just proud.
Just proud.
Zero humility.
All those CrossFit interviews, they just turn into the same thing.
Who are you training with?
What are you eating?
What's your training schedule like?
It's the same thing.
So unless you dive into a deeper part of the relationship with that person,
you're not going to get any.
There's nothing new coming out of it.
Because then you can see, like, if you don't do that,
you don't see Facundo get uncomfortable when you ask him who Haley's
coaches or like who,
like if,
who are about,
um,
Oh yeah.
Right.
Right.
Oh,
another one.
That's what it was.
Oh,
who she's been kissing,
who she's dating.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Has anyone played hockey in the gym?
Right.
Okay.
Right.
If you don't push into that space,
you don't have a,
you don't get that insight. You don't have a you don't get that insight
you don't he doesn't get uncomfortable and you don't see i don't know you don't you can't make
leaps into topics you you're making me realize how great the interview was now yeah it wasn't Fuck. Nice. Good job.
Uh,
young car.
Good morning.
Uh, seven.
I love you.
Oh,
I love you too.
Uh,
well,
that's because most athletes are generally boring on the service.
They're boring below the surface too.
Uh,
Allegra,
our,
uh,
first life show I've caught in a minute.
Good morning.
Really?
I feel like,
Oh,
well, welcome back.
Thanks for making my commute enjoyable.
Beard looks good on you, Caleb.
Dude, that's exactly what I wanted the show to be.
I want the show to be a commuter show.
I loved a fucking computer show.
Yeah, when I was driving, that's all I listened to.
Is it the 7-On podcast?
Yeah. Oh, that's awesome i listened to is the seven podcast yeah oh that's awesome yeah i love it to me i loved i love driving to school and listening to am radio 610 kfrc
i just loved it uh seven is uh humble pat self on back humbly pats himself on the back
um alright
I don't know if she's coming on
did I
you sent her a link
I think I did
I meant to
oh I'm in the right place correct
oh shit
oh shit
wrong link
yeah I must have sent her the wrong link wow what a douche nozzle
oh my goodness it's never the athlete's fault it's always our fault uh um
uh
i click the link i center and see which studio it opens up in
i'm opening up another stream yard window
oh shit
hi
hey
can you hear me
I sent you the wrong link
could you
no it's totally my fault could you click the other link i'm so sorry i
just saw the uh text i was sitting here cursing your name i take everything back no i wasn't
you see the other link it's right below where i said 26 minutes
oh son of a bitch
man i am a bad person hold on oh and you just sent me a picture Oh, son of a bitch.
Man, I am a bad person.
Hold on.
Oh, and you just sent me a picture.
Okay, you're a good dude.
Oh, here.
Here's what I can do.
I'm going to send the... Can you see the private chat?
Oh.
Okay, now I'm going gonna put something in it can you can you can you click that link
and then after you open that link come
back and close this other link oh you're
good dude let's wrap this all right
shit all right
uh Kenneth the lap seven you blew it
yeah and then you could close this other window
oh you're awesome all right hi i should have messaged you earlier no that's so lame so you've
been you've been sitting there 14 minutes yeah
it's okay hey we had you scheduled a couple weeks ago and it was like on a on a um a labor day or
something right something like that oh they people are saying they can't hear you oh really
let me see if i can turn her volume up i can take my headphones out too
how about that now can you hear now can you hear me oh it is is it still low caleb
it's better than it was here i'm gonna edit her i'm gonna turn off the automatic i'm gonna turn
her full blast and see what happens
So I think we had you scheduled but then you had training at your
The gym is gonna close early and so you had to go in the morning and train and you couldn't come on the show
Oh
Yeah, I remember that
Can they hear me now, I think so we'll find out in. Jake Chabin sounds like a phone call from the 1990s.
Hold on.
Okay, what about
that? Yeah, hold.
Yeah, hold.
Yeah, there we go.
I think that's better.
Is that what happened?
That's what happened, right?
Does that sound familiar?
Yeah, that sounds familiar.
Okay, good.
Okay, now here we go.
Now we're good.
Do you hear me okay?
Yeah.
The last time you were on the show, you've been on the show twice, right?
I think so, yeah.
It's been a while, though.
Yeah.
And then yesterday you were on Brian Spinn's podcast, and then you're doing this one, then you're doing Pedro's. You's been a while though. Yeah. And then, and then yesterday you were on a Brian spins podcast and then
you're doing this one. Then you're doing Pedro's you're on a tour.
I'm just busting them all out today. I feel like.
Do you have a book you're selling or something?
No, I just, I feel like I've been asked, like you asked me months,
I feel like months ago. And when I'm training, like games training, I just,
I have no energy to do this kind of stuff. And so I,
I guess I've just put it off until the off season.
Alexis, you officially influenced me that tier suit you had in your day in the
life video. I had to have it. I just got it. I love it.
Hey, was that a one piece
um yeah yeah so so i showed my wife that too and that's crazy that jacklyn's saying that thank you
jacklyn for the loot and i showed my wife that i go hey dude this is a dope suit she's wearing
and she goes oh i love that suit and my wife wants a one piece but then she was like why do you think
i need a one piece i'm like my wife has a crazy physique she doesn't need a one piece but i just think a one
piece would be just more comfortable you don't got to worry about shit falling off yeah i agree
yeah and it's a great suit and it's still attractive and it's not it's not like a old
lady suit but but it's still a one piece you don't have to worry about like shit falling off
yeah i like that suit oh yeah good fun yeah and you look like you know what you're doing in it.
Were you a swimmer?
No, I wasn't a swimmer.
I did dive for a couple years.
Yeah, that suit makes you look like you're a swimmer.
You know what I mean?
Like someone puts on certain clothes and you're like, oh, they're a professional.
Yeah, you look like you're ready to go to the market.
Honestly, it just makes me, I feel warmer like going into the cold launch.
Oh, cheater yeah exactly um you put you're you're pulling out
of rogue because you haven't been able to train because you're sick is the first thing you think
like oh shit that's a lot of money i'm passing by yeah yeah that's what i would think that's
what i thought not like oh i feel sorry for that i'm
like oh her poor bank account no i mean the whole experience of it like it's kind of like a mini
games in a way um and like the best in the world are there i wanted to i wanted to go and like
get better at some things that i made mistakes on at the games and like
show that off at Rogue and I was really excited to train with Travis and compete with him and
and yeah like the money is I think about the money too because the money's great
but it's really just like the whole experience that you miss out on that sucks.
But, I mean, it's there every year.
So there's always next year.
Let me throw some more salt in the wound.
And you are ā I would say that there's no homeostasis.
There's two kinds of athletes.
There's athletes that we're watching ascending, and then there's athletes there's no homeostasis. There's two kinds of athletes. There's athletes
that we're watching ascending and then there's athletes that we're, we're watching Wayne,
right? So there's ones we're seeing like climb, you know, like let's say, um, uh, uh, yellow
from, from the boys, uh, Jella hosty, jelly hosty, jelly, yellow hosta, you know, the giant dude from
like Europe. Oh, no, actually, I don't know that.
OK, well, there's this dude from Europe and he just showed up on the scene and he trains with Andre Houdet.
And it's like, oh, shit, we're going to watch him ascend or someone like Guy.
I'm just talking about the men's side now.
We're watching. We know they're going to come to the games and we're interested to see them ascend. Right.
And then there's other athletes who've been there fucking forever. And we're just like, hey, are they going to make the cut? Jason Smith.
Or we know Noah is like already talking about retiring before the games even start so we're
just wondering like where he's in a place we're kind of watching them their star fade i'm not
saying the bad or good way but alexis raptus is like a rapidly shooting star in a rapid in a space
with a lot of rapidly shooting stars there's you there's hayley there's emma carrie there's emma
lawson i
mean you guys have some shit that we all want to see like oh my god like this is a and and there's
that too right it's it's not like um you were a space shuttle launch that we're not getting to see
like everyone gathered around and i and i really do feel to be completely honest to even throw more
salt in your womb don't shed a tear after that video that that dude made to you what's his name captain cpt or something oh yeah people fell in love with you
man you were all the buzz you were all the buzz you are all the buzz and then you had that crazy
moment at the games at the um at the uh hell on earth no well that too but when you were on stage and your dad was in the audience crying and
oh yeah Dave and Dawn and I was crying that was some crazy shit yeah oh my gosh my dad um when I
was home he watches your podcast and he saw when you were talking about like seeing him in the
crowd and you guys hugging and then you said
something about him being your hero or something like that and he watched it a hundred times
yeah dude what a stud look what he raised look at you you're so awesome thank you yeah you're
like a parent's dream dude you're amazing you're a class actor a hard worker uh yeah you come
across so authentic it's cool sorry i shouldn't use that word thank
you i appreciate that that's like that means the world um but yeah i think yeah i feel like i've
been in the space for a while but it really does feel like the past two years it's kind of just
like kicked off and it's just like i mean i want to compete for as long as I can. I want to compete for years and years and years.
So it's very exciting.
Like it sucks because, yeah, I want to show off and have a perform and show everyone like how hard I've been working.
But I think it's going to make it a little bit sweeter, like holding off and having like a whole off season to just like build that fire.
And then going into the next year year just being so ready to go like that's kind of my motivation right now how long do you have to
not train for the um for the machine to start i'm losing its uh um its maximum potential?
Is it happening quickly?
Like for you to show up somewhere a hundred percent
if you didn't get to train one week before
would that hurt you? Two weeks before
would that hurt you? Three weeks before?
Yeah, I mean
I would say if I didn't train for like
two weeks out from the games I'd probably go into it feeling a little off.
But I will say I feel like I can get really fit in like 30 days, like a month.
Yeah.
Which I would say for the games this year, I was like two months out is when things got like really,
really serious and good.
And it was just like two months of crazy training.
But like after a week and then pushing two weeks of taking time off,
I start to not feel great.
Yeah.
Like you think you're losing that edge,
that super high end,
like, like percentages start coming off of your game.
Like maybe fifth place finishes would now are now ninth or 10th place finishes.
I don't know.
I feel like it's more mental.
Like if you don't go hard for two weeks and then like you go into the games and you're going as hard as you can. It's like that mental part of it.
Oh shit.
I haven't like felt this in two weeks.
It feels like it's,
it's like intimidating a little.
It's more mental.
I don't think you really lose fitness though.
Uh,
Mary,
Mary Mansour,
uh,
from,
uh,
toe spacers.
Oh,
mine smell better already from yesterday.
God,
they smell horrible when i took
them off yesterday um uh she posted on instagram she meaning alexis raptus that she's been sick
and pulled out of rogue yeah if i was a good interview i would have laid the foundation out
but i just think it's me and alexis just chatting i forget you guys are there uh Jay Hartle, more of the engine suffers.
Does he know what he's talking about?
As opposed to strength?
I don't know. I would say I'm like a...
I can make myself hurt very, very bad, if that's what he means.
Let her talk.
No, don't tell him what to do let me talk um so so what happened so what happened why did you pull out of rogue um i went on a trip and um
you had to be very careful about like the food and the water that we were drinking and where'd
you go mississippi i went to bali bali yeah um and i had never traveled somewhere that far
never traveled anywhere where like i couldn't brush my teeth like in the same quarter i had
to use a water bottle um and so i don't know exactly what like you know what i
ate or drank that like started the whole thing but a couple days after i got there starting to not
feel very well um started having diarrhea and it was like it started and then it just like
wouldn't stop and i was there for almost two weeks.
Um,
and ruining your trip,
like ruining your trip.
Wouldn't stop.
Or just like,
Oh shit.
I got to run to the bathroom.
Like I'm not going anywhere far from the bathroom.
Yeah.
I mean,
it was just like,
I was so excited for this trip and I didn't really even get to like,
to really enjoy it because I felt horrible the whole time.
Um, and I'm trying, like I was trying to like nauseous. What do you horrible the whole time um and i'm trying like
i was trying to like nauseous what do you mean horrible like i have diarrhea all the time i don't
feel horrible i enjoy it ew no uh it was diet like yes that but it was nausea like so so nauseous
um and like bloated i've never felt that before But it's a thing like a lot of people, everyone
I talked to there says, when you come you get Bali, it's called Bali belly. And basically,
like it feels like your stomach is full of food, like, so full of food, and I hadn't eaten anything.
And like anything I would put in my body if it felt like
it just was huge but I was tiny like I was losing weight so it was like super uncomfortable I was
nauseous all the time like I was trying to eat but it's hard to find like foods that I'm used to
because everything is like spiced up and it's not like cooked in healthy oils it's cooked in
this like palm oil um and so I just like really struggled to even eat and um I was there until
I left the 10th I got back the 22nd and then I planned like I was still planning on doing Rogue. I got back and it was like, it was like my
body just shut down and got way, way worse. Um, and then going into it, obviously like you all saw
the posts, like I have colitis. So when you go somewhere like that, even if you're healthy and
you know, healthy people go and they get sick and then there's someone like me who already has a
stomach issue and they go like, my stomach was just a like me who already has a stomach issue, and they go.
My stomach was just a mess.
Got back, thought I'd be able to get it under control, and it's just taken a lot longer than I thought it would.
I had to get on antibiotics.
That made me feel horrible.
Which antibiotics did you get on?
Oh, I have um, the text,
they were,
there's two of them.
One of them,
I forget the name.
It started with an M and it was like hardcore.
Like it was for hardcore bacterial infections. Cause that's what they thought I got from Bali.
Um,
and that one,
like the side effects were,
Oh my gosh.
It just felt like I was going to throw up all day long.
Horrible diarrhea, headache.
That's just like pounding.
It like, I just had no energy to like, yes, yeah, that one.
I wonder which one Danielle took at the game.
She said she took one.
She had to take me on antibiotics the week before the games, Danielle Brandon.
She said it fucked her up.
And I was like, yeah, I keep hearing that.
Yeah.
Like I would go on a walk.
That was like, you know, I was trying to move and like going on a walk would just destroy me.
Like I had no energy.
Yeah, it was just nuts.
Like even if I wanted to train, even if I wanted to eat, like I could not physically get my
body to do it. So I kind of like, yeah, I could show up to Rogue and not be my best self. And
who knows, maybe I could take 10th place, whatever. Like, I don't want to go and do that. I
want to go and like show my best self. So I just, my coach and I made the decision, like, let's just take this time, get healthy, not rush
the like healing process. Cause in the back of my head, I'm stressed. Like I have Rogan
at the end of the month, like I have to get back, I have to get back. And that was just like
stressing me out even more. So once I made that decision, I kind of felt like a little bit better because it didn't feel like I had this
weight on my back, like a timeline. Um, so yeah, made the decision and I know it's the right
decision. It's just still sucks. And like, I'm, I'm just annoyed. Cause I, I was like, I was just
very, very excited for this competition. Yeah, dude, it sucks. Who's your coach?
Adam Rogers.
That's the training think tank dude?
Yeah.
Marco Calderon.
Marco Calderon.
I donated to the cause the other day.
Oh, good. Well, thank you. I always donate to the cause.
Yeah, Alexis even says thank you.
She likes to see me get supported.
She's a good dude.
Brian Minton, a Ballybelly happens to most people who drink tap water or ice.
Charcoal helps get rid of Ballybelly.
Yeah.
I bought the charcoal pills, but I didn't end up taking them because, I don't know.
Everyone was giving me so many things, and I was freaked out by it.
So I didn't end up trying the charcoal.
Hey, what about um uh when you
come back do you do all did you do a parasite cleanse no i got tested for a parasite um which
the hospital i went to did not have a great experience because i they were supposed to call
me with like my results they did blood stool yeah, that was it, the blood and stool.
And they were supposed to call me with that, and they never gave me my results, and I've called them twice.
And I'm just like, well, I assume if I had a parasite, you would have called me.
But the antibiotics, like, killed everything, like, even the good bacteria in my gut at this point.
So yeah.
Yeah.
Um,
what,
what is,
what is colitis?
Like what's the real cause of it?
You know,
they'll be like,
Oh,
there's type two diabetes or there's heart disease or there's this and that.
And then like at the end of the day,
we know it's cause people eat like assholes.
What,
what,
what is the,
um,
I mean,
does anyone know what it is?
It's one of your intestines just gets irritated and inflamed.
Yeah.
It's the large intestine.
It gets super inflamed.
Yeah.
And you've had that since you've been a little kid.
No, I, it's only been 20 since 2018.
Can you just deny you have it?
Can you be like, no no i don't have that
um sometimes i try and tell myself what yeah that's what i do what can you do to make it go
away you just basically it makes you just so you don't want to eat you just want to drink water
it's fucked you can't be a professional athlete and and no um i, there's different diet, like everyone's different. For me, there's different foods that I know to just stay away from. And just like a very plain diet helps me. I know when I'm stressed, like that triggers it. So before competition, it's just like, it's kind of hit or miss. Like sometimes,
I mean, I could go, I could go months and months and like, forget that I even have it.
And then there's times it's typically like in season, certain times where I just feel very
overwhelmed and stressed. And like, if my, if I eat stuff that my stomach doesn't like, that kind of triggers it.
I would say like medications.
I've taken different medications that help like calm down my stomach.
And then once things are like calm down, then I'm in a good spot for a while.
Different like natural supplements that my doctor has gotten me on to just like help my
good bacteria in my gut. Um, cause I mean, my gut's just been messed up, especially with
like antibiotics. I was on antibiotics as a kid and like all the time for strep throat and.
Oh yeah. That'll fuck you up, man.
That'll mess you up years and years down the line. So it's like my stomach is just a mess. And yeah, many people have reached out to me, by the way, when they saw you were going to be on like close friends. And they're like, hey, I got that. Hey, I got that. Yeah, I got that. Like, that's a motherfucker to deal with. Yeah, it's nuts and like i mean i actually not like i know two people close to me who have
it which is crazy and then like the amount of dms i've gotten of people who i had no idea deal with
this has just been insane i'm like wow i mean no one talks about it but you just kind of assume
like you're the only one no one wants to to be like, I have explosive diarrhea. Yes, literally.
Yeah.
So it's whenever I eat barbecue, I have diarrhea and I use spicy sauce too, which is like three times a week.
J. Oh, here's the cure.
The COVID booster is 100 effective for curing.
Oh, that's awesome.
Well, shit.
Okay.
Well, nice having you on the show.
I'm glad I knew we would get the solution.
That's it.
Alyssa, how does one get diagnosed with this?
I have had colonoscopies done
and then they can see it through that.
That's a camera or a finger?
I had the finger,
I had two fingers.
I mean,
not at the same time,
two different guys.
Wow.
Yeah.
Oh,
I haven't had that,
but,
um,
well,
you had a camera.
Don't get all braggadocious on me.
I didn't have a camera.
Yeah.
They,
they,
um,
they do a camera and then they'll do like a little,
I have seen second one? I think. Yeah.
Do they actually cut a piece of your intestine out?
Like scrape a piece of it?
I don't know. Like you're asleep. I don't, I don't know,
but I know that they like take some, like some type of sample and then they,
like go and test it. And my, like,
I had that done years ago and that's when I found out.
And then when my stomach acted up again this year, um, my doctor wanted me to have another
one done just to like, see if things have gotten worse or whatever.
And it's pretty much the same.
It's microscopic colitis.
Um, and it like flares up and then you'll be good.
And it's just, what is it?
Is it the shape of your intestine? Is it, is there something living in there? Is it like, what is it? I think it's just
the inflammation, like your stomach or your intestine can only take so much inflammation.
And so then it's just like expelled through diarrhea and then your body's just never getting
a break. Like there's never any time to just like, let it chill out. And so like right now,
that's what I'm doing. I'm just trying to let my body relax and chill out because i i will say like
training really hard and and like pushing your body to the maximum like very very intense workouts
kill my stomach like i this has happened ever since i started crossfit it's like it's like a
okay like the workout i think of a 10 minute echo bike test.
I remember the last time I did this because it was like, so I was in so much pain.
It's like my stomach like cramps up and like seizes up and it's like spasming for like,
I, it was doing it like for like 30 minutes after and my stomach's just torn up like a
mess.
And it's really just like, I sort of get used to like my body gets used to it, especially when I'm
in games training, I'm doing a ton of really hard, super intense workouts. But if it's just like,
I'm coming back into training hard. And it's like the open where you're going like really hard for one workout a
week like those workouts mess up my stomach pretty bad um and so like the off season i probably won't
do as many of those because those mess up my stomach and just kind of like focus on health
and like being a healthy human for a little bit you know everyone in the comments is like uh you know
stand upside and eat stand upside down and eat popcorn and talk to this and do this and do you
have a plan of attack are you is that it seems like the solution you would want would be a lifestyle
adjustment so that you don't have to take meds right so like like if it's hey if it's eating
that burger king every morning i'll fucking do it like oh shit diet coke fixes this great i'm on it um yeah i i work with a doctor from wild health
who's like they take a more kind of like not holistic but like they're not trying to throw
a bunch of medicine at me and um they know exactly what i do they were at the crossfit games
they watched me so they get it and um right now we're working on trying to find like what works
for my body um i mess it like we talk back and forth every day um and so i think like working
with them now because i just started working with them now,
cause I just started working with them, like I said,
two months before the games and that's when I felt my best.
And so now working with them and like creating a plan and having a plan,
like a year out from the games, I think is going to be every like huge.
And just being able to like ask them some questions like have someone to just ask like
an idea off of or whatever um lifestyle i can't really change by that i meant mostly food you
know what i mean food food sleep i'm not saying like move away from the power lines i'm just like yeah no food is hard because like i have to eat so
much food yeah and it's exhausting um and it's not like the healthy foods that like
like i can't eat salads i can't eat raw vegetables i can't eat which is which is what you need which
is which i think is it's how probiotics survive
by the way people take probiotics but I was just looking into it basically it doesn't matter if
you take probiotics if you don't feed if you don't feed them yeah just go away and so if you can and
they live off of shit that's on vegetables I guess yeah so you can't eat vegetables so you're
because that because that irritates it yeah but I can. Can people be cured from it?
Has anyone been cured from colitis?
No.
It's not like you just manage it.
But I can eat certain cooked vegetables, and then I'll do basically a vegetable powder.
So, I mean, there's ways around it.
and um so i mean there's ways around it like i i get in like all the nutrients that i'm supposed to but it's not like typical like having vegetables at every single meal and like i can't
eat nuts and seeds like it has to be like a i'm eating like a butt like a sunflower butter or a peanut butter, it's probably creamy.
And then going out to eat, you just have to be careful because different oils,
like high inflammatory oils, just really hurt my stomach.
How about ice cream?
No, ice cream is fine.
I'm good with dairy.
I'm good with gluten.
When you say good, you're good good. If you just ate eggs and ice cream, life would be good.
Oh, I mean, no, I'm not going to do that. But if I eat ice cream.
But I mean for your colitis. I mean for your colitis. I don't mean for like your performance or your, but.
I mean, yeah, like it doesn't bother me. Sourdough, like I eat a lot of sourdough.
It's really easy on my stomach rice it smells good
and feels good in your hand too sourdough yeah do you make it no i just i just i don't really
get to eat much of it these days but as a young man i would just get a baguette or i would just
eat bread and sourdough and just yeah it's the best yeah but um butter can you have butter you can
have butter yeah i can have butter yeah just get a baguette every morning and just lather the inside
of it with a stick of butter yeah i mean could you be a games champion with that diet probably
yeah i can be a games champion with my diet were you gonna say yeah yeah um it's not like i've treated it like it's probably not like a diet of
another athlete i don't know um but yeah like whole grains it's not really the best for my
stomach dude what if you got a baskin robin sponsorship i love baskin robin oh my god
then chocolate chip fuck you guys you scumbags that got Snickers
How dare you I have Baskin Robbins
I love Baskin Robbins
Mint chocolate chip
That was actually one of the things that sounded good when I was sick
Because I ate that as a kid all the time
You went into the games this year with a flare up
Did you consider pulling out of the games?
No I feel like people are getting that confused it was semi-finals
semi-finals okay so at the games you were good at the games i was golden okay well that's awesome
yeah it was it was amazing do you have a boyfriend um we're going to keep that personal life out of it.
You don't talk. Oh, how come you don't talk about your personal life?
Well,
Cause then if you break up with them, then you have to like,
then you have to like explain that too. Is that why?
No, I feel like I share a lot, not a ton,
but I just feel like i don't know there's like part of me that when you start
sharing stuff you can't like take it away so then it's like i don't know i want like a limit
i don't want to share everything i i understand what if um would let's say hypothetically if you
did have a boyfriend do would would you think he might get
upset and be like you're hiding me so that other boys will still hit on you that's why you don't
want to talk about me by the way if he does that kick his ass to the curb but i'm just saying no
you haven't had to deal with that no but i i know i have friends who are i haven't heard it from
girls but i have friends who are boys who've had girlfriends that they haven't
shared on Instagram and then they get in trouble.
Because.
I don't know. I feel like that says something about the person.
Right. You mean the person who's getting upset?
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. What other stuff don't you share?
I mean, I've kept this from people for like years.
I don't know. I think it just takes time to like feel comfortable to share stuff.
Like I think now is the perfect time to share this.
Because it's like I kind of put it off as like, well, I have stomach issues.
And that's what I would just say.
Um, but I've met people, I've met people in the past month, months where they like, once
they have learned about me having colitis, they were like, so inspired that like, I'm
a professional athlete and that I deal with this and and I was like
man if I can inspire other people just by talking about this then why would I not post about it
so fire them to what um not let it hold them back like like I want to be
I want to win the CrossFit games and I'm not going to let colitis hold me back like like I want to be I want to win the CrossFit games and I'm not gonna let
colitis hold me back I mean everyone I don't know what everyone else deals with I know like
what I have dealt with and I I think honestly like all the really really hard days actually make me better and make me stronger and I feel I feel like the
most resilient version of myself I've ever been and I think that's I think that's only going to
help me be a better athlete how old are you again Alexis 24? 24. Oh, man. You're so young still.
Yeah.
Are any of the other competitions on your radar?
Or Waterpalooza?
I am thinking about Waterpalooza, yeah.
Yeah.
And does that stress you out thinking about that?
No.
I mean, that makes me excited.
I love competing.
So it's something to look forward to these next few months.
How's Travis doing?
Is he still a good CrossFitter?
Or did he get old?
I mean, he's old, but he's a really good CrossFitter.
But when you say he's good, is he good for a Masters game?
Can I get behind him this year?
Oh, yeah.
I think you should get behind him.
Yeah.
Okay.
I kind of want to.
I think I'm trying to pick my guys who to get behind this year.
Yeah.
No, he's fired up.
I mean, he's literally spent the whole year just like
watching from the sidelines he is yeah i mean i'm really excited to see what he can do at a row
um i hope he can really just like show the world how good he is in training like he's so so good
and i just i want people to see that.
I want people to see, like, his true potential.
Here's what I'm concerned.
Here's what I'm concerned about.
Because I think my guys this year are Justin Medeiros, Travis, and Colton.
Like, I'm going to really, like, get, those are my guys I really want to, like, invest my attention to.
Here's my concern about travis i
have concerns about all of them what a fucking bunch of weirdos i've chosen but what if travis
is all what if his all mental like i think his mental game is skyrocketing which makes me think
that maybe he's getting old because old dudes like their mental game starts to skyrocket.
Right?
His mental game is on point, right?
Yeah, no.
He's ready.
Like he's in a really good spot mentally.
I mean, and physically.
And he's one of the only dudes that doesn't look like he's dabbled in PEDs.
That concerns me too, that maybe he actually is natural.
That would suck.
Yeah.
He's as natural as he gets.
All right.
Yeah.
I think he could be top five.
You think he could be top five?
That's what a Tyler Watkins is saying.
Yeah, I think so.
You're not just saying that because he's your dude.
No,
I swear.
Like he's,
he's so,
so good.
And he's not,
if he sees this,
he's going to bring this up all the time
but I truly think
he could be top five
awesome
what about this
girl
this
crazy girl you got
in your gym
who
Andrea or something
Audrey
she was on the demo team
last year
what
oh Chloe is it Chloe she's tall Chloe She was on the demo team last year What?
Oh, Chloe?
Is it Chloe?
She's tall Yeah, this girl on the right
Oh, Ashley
Yes, Ashley
What about her?
Is she going to make it to the games?
Should I get on her bandwagon?
She looks kind of wild
Is she wild?
She's crazy
In the best way
Okay, good
Yeah, I love her She's really fun Can she make it in the best way okay good yeah she's fine she's really fun uh yeah can she make
it to the games or is she just demo athlete material i think i think she can make it to the
games um she was in a uh contending spot the sunday morning i think by semifinals i really Sunday morning, I think. That's in my finals. I really like how she presents.
Yeah, I mean, she's.
So fun, lighthearted, energetic.
Very lighthearted.
She's hilarious.
I competed with her.
As a team in 20.
15.
Yeah.
At the games.
Yeah.
We were like,
we have a picture.
Um,
actually it's probably on our Instagram.
Dude,
if you're 24 and it's 2023 and you competed with her in 2015,
let me do that.
That's that's seven years ago.
And 24 minus seven is 17.
You were at the games on a team at 17.
No,
not as a teenager.
Oh,
as a teenager.
Yeah.
Oh,
oh.
And teens,
not teams.
Yeah.
Oh,
so she's been to the games before as a team.
Yeah.
Oh,
she's a bad dude.
Okay.
Sorry.
All that wasted math.
I just did.
Okay.
Yeah.
That's like when I met her,
we've known each other for years.
Yeah. All right. Um, uh, on the, on the sick, are you, are you getting better or do you still
have to get worse before you get better? Are you getting better? Oh, I'm getting better.
I feel so much better. Like today, what's I think today's the fourth day. Like I feel really like my energy is back.
I'm moving in the gym.
Like I've been doing a lot of biking this week, bodybuilding,
starting to get under a little bit of weight again.
Yeah, I'm eating.
Like I'm eating a ton of food.
Yeah, I'm definitely like over the hump.
So you're on track.
You feel good.
Yeah.
Will you ever go to Bali again?
No.
When's your next trip out of the country?
I have no plans. I really realized I'm not like the idea of traveling is fun, but I'm just like a homebody.
I don't want to leave.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just messes up the routine.
I'm like a routine girl.
If you want to see if you want a cultural experience, go to Los Angeles.
If I want, I'm just going to
YouTube anywhere. I can
just see it.
Did you go to Wanderlust?
Did you go to Wanderlust?
Yeah, it was awesome.
It was awesome? Yeah, the gym's amazing.
I just was so sick.
I feel bad.
That was
Before things went down
Did you see the dude with the ponytail there?
The guy who owns the place?
Yes
Yeah that's cool
Yeah Dave's awesome
Yeah
Sorry
Oh my god
that's so cool
you were there
that sucks
that it turned sideways
I know
I know
and he felt bad
like
cause my mom
went with me too
and she got
she actually got
sicker than I did
oh shit
thanks
um
and he like
did your boyfriend
did your boyfriend
get in the dog
oh my gosh stop okay I um I had to try one more time.
I, Oh yeah. I told him, I was like, my mom and I are so sick. Um, and he, I mean, people visit,
he has like, he has so many people drop in. I don't remember how many people he said, like a thousand a month or something like that.
So I'm sure he sees it a lot.
But he gave us some of these super natural hydration drinks.
I mean, he was great.
He was trying to help as much as he could.
And I mean, these pictures, the views were amazing.
Let me see your mom again.
Let me see your mom again, Caleb.
Dang.
Yeah.
How old is she?
57.
Dang.
Yeah.
Tell her I said hi.
She's probably watching.
Oh, good.
Hey, girl.
What's her name?
Susan. Hey, Susan. hi she's probably watching oh good hey hey girl what's her name susan hey susan uh alexis can you pass buds oh shit wow uh yeah yeah easy i don't know i don't know whatever what the challenge is
it's it's just you got to stay up for a week that's it and then and then you got to spend the
rest of your life talking about how hard it is to anyone on the Internet who listen.
And then you got to sell energy drinks.
Did you do it?
No, I'm not doing that shit.
You got to carry.
You got to shoot people, too.
I was when I was that age, I wasn't willing to shoot anyone.
Now I'm older.
I would shoot someone if I had to.
Yeah, I i mean me too
what if i had to yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah like if if some dude was trying to stab your boyfriend you'd shoot them or your girlfriend sorry i didn't mean to put you in a
in a box yeah i mean anyone that i love yeah i just saw a video on the internet the internet's
a i just saw a video on the internet in new york where a guy gets stabbed to death and his
girlfriend just sits there and watches like right next to him they're coming home from a wedding i know i'm
like what the fuck is going on here why didn't that girl do something my wife would fuck someone
up if they touch me oh yeah oh my god i know it's traumatizing you're probably a good wingman
you could handle your own i I would like to think so. Yeah.
Final question.
What,
what is the, um,
uh,
area you,
you of most improvement we'll see.
Um,
I know the games are far away,
but,
uh,
what,
what is something you think that this year at the games you're going to
want to showcase?
Um,
you'll be like,
yep.
I mean,
hold my beer.
Give you what? A sandbag yeah like i spend a lot of time with the sandbag oh sorry one more question what did you think about cooper marsh's uh comment
on your post did you see it yeah i saw it he said you made the colitis post and he wrote that takes a lot of guts.
I mean, he's, he's got to make it like, you know, it can't be too serious.
Is that your agent?
Yeah.
Yeah.
What a good dude.
Who needs, who needs enemies when you have a friend like that?
Proud of your guts to make this more public.
Future is only getting brighter
he helped me like i mean he's known about it forever i've been working with him i've known
kubler since i was like 16 does he have colitis nope he doesn't if i was your agent i would just
tell you i have it sympathy yeah when I told my dad when I was in
uh high school I wanted to get a nose job he told me he my dad doesn't have a giant nose like mine
he's like oh yeah I got a nose job and then later on I find out he just said that to make me feel
better oh my gosh yeah no he hasn't done that for me so he's not a good dude alright
thank you for coming on the show wonderful to see you
thank you for having me
hopefully it doesn't take months and months
to schedule like this time
oh it's fine it's fine it just sucked that
you went on Brian's before mine don't ever do that again
it's okay
don't take it personal
I did
and we didn't get to hear about your relationships, your extracurricular relationships, but we did see a beautiful picture of your mom.
So I think that's an awesome consolation.
Yeah.
Made up for it.
Yeah, totally.
All right, dear.
Talk to you soon.
And will you be watching Rogue?
Do you think you'll go and attend and like sign autographs
and kiss baby? No.
I'll watch.
Well then maybe we'll reach out to you
and have you on for some post shows
and just be like hey what did you think? Did so and so shit the bed or what?
Yeah. I'm down.
Alright cool. Alright.
Give Travis a big kiss for me please.
I'll give him a big hug for you.
Okay cool. Thank you.
Alright. Thank you. Bye. Bye. me please i'll give him a big hug for you okay cool thank you all right thank you bye bye alexis raptus matt burns speedy recovery young lady
uh shit the bed oh yeah i didn't even think about that shit the bed shit the bed
oh shit hey dude um that uh that that is really smart for anyone who's courting her
like take a look at that mom because that's where people go like if you saw my like
i should ask hayley that question if she ever looked at my dad and was like Cause that's where people go. Like if you saw my, like I,
I should ask Haley that question.
If she ever looked at my dad and was like,
yep,
that's a keeper.
Cause my dad's really good looking.
Like he didn't,
he just,
he did.
My dad looks like fucking George Pappard,
like Hannibal Smith from the A team.
You know what I mean?
Like he's,
my dad's a stud.
Even at,
I always thought it was the other way around.
Like the dudes looked at the girl's mom.
Well,
they should either way. But like, I'm only going to get better looking so like it's fine line yeah exactly i'm
not going to get or i'm not going to get um so you just look at her why you just look at alexis's
mom and you're like yep don't be stupid and like pick something that and then you see the mom and
it's like just horrible looking because that's what you're going to end up with. Oh, it always skips a generation.
Is that true?
I don't know if that's true.
I think you just said that.
I think you said that because your dad's ugly.
I went through a phase where I was wondering if I was adopted.
I look just like my mom.
It's crazy.
My mom and my sister
and I are basically the same person,
just with different genitalia.
Wow.
Dan Guerrero, you look like Steven Seagal, but anorexic.
I appreciate you consistently
being a dick to me.
It's nice.
It's nice.
Uh,
HQ is in town.
I haven't run into anyone from HQ yet.
I really been wanting to,
what are they doing?
I don't know.
Oh,
they're aren't they all at Dave's house or something?
All 200 people. Employees are at Dave dave's house yeah they had a big
old seminar everybody's working out yeah i saw that video yesterday it says uh it's mr b you
know mr beast is the most successful person ever on youtube and i was and he has this video it's
i don't even think he put it together but someone's like 10 tips from mr beast and someone
like put the compilation together and it made me realize i should put together the
most successful chief marketing officer in the history of the world and give my five tips
and i would start it by saying what metrics i'm the most successful that there ever was
when i started the company there were 300 gyms, and then there were 15,000.
That's a good metric.
Yeah.
Good start.
All seven continents, 162 countries.
As opposed to apples in only 28 countries.
That's impressive. McDonald's was only 119 companies.
Just be like, fuck fuck you That's me
I don't know
It's a lot of work
I do like jerking myself off
But yeah
It's either that or go to the skate park
Tell the world how great I am
Or go to the skate park
Honest question
Did that number increase because of you?
I mean CrossFit is a media company you want to know what i what i what i honestly honestly honestly think Greg Glassman is so incredibly charismatic, like crazy.
And he ā it's so fun listening to him speak.
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And there isn't a more, it's a collision of, collision of and i'll just there's so much i could say but
it's a collision of the simplest and most effective health methodology ever presented on the planet
and he could articulate it better than than anyone could articulate any fitness program so you have
these three things you have this guy presenting something that's so crazy potent that he created that's so fucking simple to do to get immediate results like you can just
put some start someone across who's never done it and in two weeks they're like holy
shit my body composition is changing like that you can't even believe what's happening to you
so that's what i was dealing with but but did the making of Every Second Counts and the fucking massive, massive contribution I made to the journal and the way I made it change the trajectory of the company?
100% no fucking doubt.
100%
100%
The podcast, all the documentaries, all the instructional content coming out of the L1, all those that i push forward the email of the day all those fucking things that i led i pushed
the first two years i would travel 2008 2009 i went to more affiliates than anyone else on the
planet visiting them driving around the country saying hi to people kissing babies putting out
a video every single day fuck yeah 100 change of trajectory made a contribution. That's top
three or four for sure. Up there with Greg, uh, Dave, Nicole, Tony, Lauren, put myself in any,
in any, up against any of those dudes. So yeah. And that is also the thing. Greg is,
is irreplaceable. There are a lot of irreplaceable. What's interesting. People will always be like,
Oh, it's not about one man or everyone's replaceable.
Not in that beginning phase, it wasn't.
Not like that.
There is no way fucking Greg's replaceable.
And that's going to be a problem for them going forward forever.
Because once you have the truth, you just have to say the truth over and over and over in different ways and there's no one there doing
that now and there may be never anyone
doing that that's why those gurus will
write like 50 books telling you how to get to
God and it's like the same shit over and
over and over and over
I just said for different cues for different people
so so
Andy Garcia just
Marissa Hanosa
Andy Garcia just
just flipped the script
just left the just came out
he's taking the really bold step for a Hollywood actor and basically letting the world know he's against censorship and pedophilia.
Huge.
I mean, that's it.
He's done in Hollywood.
You're against pedophilia and censorship.
You're done.
against pedophilia and censorship, you're done.
He believes that black and white people should,
and Asian people and Mexican people and people of all colors should be judged by their character, not their skin color.
He's toast. You can't do that in Hollywood. He's toast.
What do you think all, like, I was looking at the gay flag the other day,
and, like, I don't even see it as the gay flag anymore.
What do you see it as?
I see it as you have to take the injection.
You hate black people.
You hate white people.
You hate men.
You love pedophiles.
You'll believe in election fraud.
You'll do election fraud.
It's not even the gay flag anymore.
It's like everything.
It's like.
It's the encompassing of everything that like that that guest of mine would say is evil.
It's all all those people.
It's all the people who are OK with crime in the streets, the looting, the stealing.
It's all it's all of those things now. It become it's a yeah it's it's a hate flag
yeah it's just it's just a giant massive hate flag it's just the corruption of society
it used to be like you would see in front of a bar and it's like hey it's cool it's cool in here
this is like if you want to like like in here there'll be some gay people and you can date you know what i mean or it's like if you go to a barber shop it's like, hey, it's cool. It's cool in here. This is like if you want to like like in here, there'll be some gay people and you can date.
You know what I mean? Or it's like if you go to a barbershop, it's like, hey, this is gay owned.
Come support it if you're gay. You know, help. You know what I mean? It used to be like that.
This is a gay bookstore. You know what I mean? Like maybe gay run.
Just like if you saw an Armenian flag somewhere, you'd go in there and be like, OK, I'm going to buy some baklava on here because it's my homies.
Like it used to be like to signal the homies like, hey, this is cool.
Now there is no gay flag it's gone completely taken it's like
you know the swastika before it would belong
to Hitler or belong to the Buddhist did you know that
yeah I think it was
yeah it was a Buddhist or like Egyptians or something
like the Buddhist so it's like a Buddhist
peace symbol and the Nazis
took it and the Nazis also took
the gay flag they just took it they just
fucking scooped it up weird uh jake chapman seven's trying to be humble and not imply the box owners
don't have ownership of the success we have seven you're the tourism board that got people to visit
crossfit for what we humbly thank you I am not taking anything away from the affiliate owners at all.
When we used to make media, Greg would be like, hey, dude, I don't give a fuck about the media other than it being for the affiliates.
Speak to the affiliates.
Like people from the outside would be like, I don't understand this.
Greg's like, I don't care.
We make media for our affiliates.
That's too inside humor. I don't care. We make shit for our affiliates. We make tools for our affiliates. Our videos are for our affiliates. Yeah, I'm not taking games without the affiliates. That's why the PFAA and all that shit is so stupid.
Anyone who's not trying to grow the affiliates is not trying to grow the games.
The games athletes do not need agents.
They do not need sponsors.
They do not need blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Someone's going to be like,
maybe I'm hyperbolizing it a little bit,
but I don't care.
What they need,
when's the last time you've seen a games athlete support an affiliate?
If the affiliates go away tomorrow, the games becomes a smaller than Florida grid league.
The, the Jiu Jitsu, there's this Jiu Jitsu tour in the Bay area called, it's called BJJ Jiu Jitsu tour. It will be, if the affiliates leave that little tour in the Bay area called it's called bjj jiu-jitsu tour it will be if the affiliates leave that
little tour in the bay area will be bigger than the crossfit games we need to split the crossfit
games from crossfit oh really good luck with that you're toast you're toast
i i all i want to see from fikowski from fikowski, I'm not picking on you, Brent, but
you're, you're the face of the PFAA is you going into affiliates.
That's it.
The more you jerk affiliates off, the faster the games will grow.
End of story.
There's nothing else to do.
Quit being fucking dumb.
You guys are sitting in the tree, like being like praying for more fruit.
How about you fucking focus on the roots?
Get out of the tree and start working on the roots.
The roots of the tree are the affiliates.
I'm not picking on Brent at all.
I don't mean to be.
He obviously wants to grow the sport And I don't sense any like
Nefarious shit
Or him being a scumbag
Or him being greedy
I don't sense any of that from him
I think he's probably a really great dude
To be honest
But it's just misled
It's all affiliates
There's nothing
There's zero games
100% subsidized by the affiliates
across the board every metric from fans to money to and i get it i'm not expecting 22 year old
athletes to understand um that uh when in another 10 years when they're 32 they're going to be like
holy they're going to start waking up like you're seeing mayhem is like we saw kalipa do, like we saw even Greg Glassman do where they realize, hey, this isn't about racing.
This is about curing the world's most vexing problem. I'm not asking for a 22 year old to
understand that, but I'm asking them to fake it until they do. Go kiss some babies, be nice to
the old people, go into the fucking gyms, support your affiliate or go fuck yourself. Not all your other energy everywhere else is being wasted.
And I'm not saying that because I have some like hard on for the affiliates.
I'm just telling you, it's just the way it is.
It's a hundred percent true what I'm saying.
It's like so obvious.
All roads lead to that follow to where everything is coming from.
The affiliates.
coming from the affiliates he he when when did we see jason cleaver wake up he he he swayed over he swayed over to uh see he swayed he went from a games athlete to parlaying his games um fame
to uh i think helping the community to um and and then and then sort of bailing and then now coming back and now he's kind of like
walking, he's walking the middle ground.
He goes back and forth between self-interest and service and I like that.
I think it's good.
I beg of you, hit the like button, everyone.
Thank you. you hit the like button everyone thank you and even if my contribution didn't let's say let's
say my contribution isn't isn't what helped grow the company my uh i had i had the best seat in
the house i had a better seat i i had the best seat in the house if anyone had a better seat
than me i was sitting on their lap and therefore i had a better seat than me, I was sitting on their
lap and therefore I had a better seat than them. So if someone's like, Hey, Greg had a better seat
than you'll be like, well, I was sitting on his lap. I had a better seat than him. You know what
I mean? You're sitting seventh row center to see Les Mis in New York and with your mom and dad,
and I'm sitting on their lap. Yeah. Seventh row center, best seat in the house generally speaking fourth to seventh now you know
audio do the bears play tonight do the bears play tonight i think so thursday night football
yeah it's uh against washington commanders uh and so from the best seed, I can tell you what did it.
I know.
Tyson Bajent.
What a shitty name.
The Bears Instagram page posted a video of him getting on the bus to go to the plane.
Oh, it did?
Can we see that?
Yeah.
Bears HC opens to D2 star Tyson Bajan being Justin Fields.
Former Division II star quarterback Tyson Bajan is in the mix
to be named as the Chicago Bears' top backup signal caller.
That's nine hours ago from Bleacher Report.
Tyson.
I think everything's open right now.
Head coach Matt Eberfluss told reporters
after the Bears 24-17 preseason lost to Indianapolis Colts.
Must be nine hours ago.
Oy, the backup quarterback is 5 of 12 for 25 yards
with one interception that's not good
meanwhile Tyson was a 13 of 15 for 113 yards
come on man give him a chance
Bears head coach Matt Eberfluss
on Tyson Bajent
I saw poise
the delivery was there
the accuracy looked pretty good
pretty good
get your fucking glasses checked
oh that's a cool picture
wow
it's a video but I just paused it with him walking
oh okay yeah
hold on I have to
I think this is Tom Guerin
hold on let's see what's going on.
Tomas.
Hi buddy.
I want to play a quick game with you.
Okay.
Uh, we're going to play a game of Republican or Democrat.
Are you ready?
Yes.
Yes.
Okay.
I know a personal friend who, uh, graduated college and graduated college and became a high school teacher and a debate coach.
And then at the age of 26 years old, started dating openly a 15-year-old sophomore high school student.
15 year old sophomore high school student. And apparently that went on for years. It was kind of hidden in plain view and just came out in the newspaper two days ago and he was arrested and
taken to jail. Republican or Democrat? OK, so a pedophile Democrat. That's one point. Democrat,
a college Democrat. That's two points. And a teacher indoctrinator.
That's three Democrat. But debate team, that's one Republican because we know Democrats.
You know, so it's three to one Democrat. I'm going to have to side with the numbers.
I'm a numbers guy, Democrat. You'd be absolutely right.
And hopefully he can run for office from prison And probably get elected
You know what's funny though
That's Republican
That would make him a Republican
Well that's true too
You'd be sad to know that the debate teams
Are actually almost exclusively liberals
It's like 99.99%
And the reason is because they're affiliated with academia and
Republicans have jobs. Like no Republican is going on Saturday to judge a debate tournament.
It's only the teachers and professors. So the teachers and professors vote for the wacky
liberal stuff. And so that's what wins. And so it just is a self-perpetuating cycle.
Because a dude who's like a construction worker or a CEO is rarely showing up at a high school debate tournament on Saturday.
So it just doesn't it's actually pretty bad, to be honest with you.
Two plus two is not four because four is racist.
Thank you from the Stanford Debate Club. Thank you very much. I'm Seba Matosian. Thank you from the Stanford Debate Club.
Thank you very much.
I'm Seb Amatosi.
And thank you very much.
You know, Beaver could look this up.
There was a college debate team when I was in college a few years ago who did a performance.
They would get up there and like get ready like they were going to read a case and have a real debate.
And instead, they wanted to reclaim their bodies from the patriarchy.
So what do you think they did?
This is a Harvard debate team.
What?
They stripped, stripped in the classroom, in the debate room. They did a performative strip dance and they won the debate tournament. Look it up.
Wow. If you get caught masturbating in the audience while the debate team is stripping is that um freedom of speech as long as you're masturbating
to reclaim your femininity i don't i don't know you'd have to come up with some um so if you're
gay it's okay yeah as long as you get a pass hey what do you think about the gay flag is not the
gay flag anymore right it's just a hate flag like they've've lost that. Right. They lost that.
Not theirs anymore.
Got taken from.
I think that.
Yeah.
From the Buddhist.
If by gay, you mean men who like other men.
You're right.
It's not a gay flag.
It's you're right.
If by women or women who like other women, that flag stands for.
I allow men to knock women out in the UFC.
I allow men to change to go into changing rooms.
That flag and I allow men to go into prisons and rape women.
That's what that flag stands for.
And that has nothing to do with being gay.
There's no gay people who want that.
The gay people I know, it's so irrelevant to their life.
I just don't think they have any thoughts about the crazy stuff.
You know, they're mostly they're just people, right?
I mean, who thinks about this stuff other than complete nutjobs and psychopaths?
Like, it's just not part of our lives. Like me yeah exactly no it's great for youtube yeah it's really helping the algorithm that's right the
audience uh just oh dude by the way i know it's crazy you know what's transcending the algorithm
is the subclip station is now murdering and so it doesn't matter how bad the shows are doing
the sub clips
are now like it's like taking on a life of its own it's so cool it's awesome is it mostly game
stuff or is it other stuff yeah it's mostly gay people who watch our sub clips yeah gay people
gay crossfitters yeah hey it's this show does have a pretty fucking amazingly strong gay contingent.
How about Garrett? She's awesome. When you say
gay people, she's great. She's awesome.
She checks two boxes. She's black, too.
Is she?
Oh, yeah. That's awesome.
And what about Shelby Neal?
And she's a parent. Shelby Neal.
Yeah. Straight, though.
Oh, well, that's too bad.
You need at least two.
Tim Murray was gay he'd be awesome
Or black
Is he black did you ask him
I want to tell you something
My mom said something
Probably shouldn't drag my mom into this
She's a good dude
I didn't ask Tim Murray if he's black
I made the assumption he wasn't
That was racist
no whatever
someone
okay buddy I'm gonna let you go I gotta drive
peace and love
okay bye peace and love
someone asked me the other day if I was only friends with them
because they were gay I said listen
are you only friends with me because I were gay. I said, listen.
Are you only friends with me because I'm a podcaster?
What kind of fucking crazy question is that?
Are you only friends with me because I'm black?
Am I your token black friend?
No.
You're one of a thousand, motherfucker.
Get in line.
I have this one gay friend.
It's so crazy that people say it. Listen, do not.
Be a nice person and then choose your friends superficially.
That's what I do.
Oh, I would still be friends with Caleb if he didn't come and help me with the show.
Totally.
There'd be no reason for us to communicate zero
I would have loved to have had Tim
Murray on the show if he wasn't a dwarf and he wasn't
the fittest man alive
I like Greg
Glassman equally if he didn't have more money than God
Or was poor
No I love the fact he's filthy rich
It's so cool
It's a great quality
I love it
Cause you can call on him from his boat in Croatia
Big dick everybody
I'm so offended that people come over to my house on fight night
I think they're
just doing it to drink my booze good good please come over here just to drink my booze
because i can't drink it all myself this thing someone's using me like it's some sort of fucking
bad thing listen what's bad is if Someone brings their kids over to your house
And they pee on the seat and they don't clean it up
That's when you can't be my friend
You just want to be my friend
To come over to my house and pick my apples during apple season
And you're nice to me and you help me pick apples
I'm perfectly okay with that
This fucking bullshit
Like
You're only my friend because i'm seven feet tall and have
giant d titties uh-huh and well and you're nice and you wear low-cut shit it's how you
it's how you present them it's so crazy this uh
like like you should just be friends with everyone.
I have trouble finding out who my real friends are.
People just like me because of my podcast.
What if I did the whiny voice with the echo?
What if you just like me because I sound like a robot?
Hello?
What if you just liked me because I was a crying god?
It's not bad.
It's not bad.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'd be... If Brian Friend didn't know shit about the games, I'd still be friends with him.
Dude, let me tell you, I don't know who loves me the most, but.
I don't know who loves me the most, but my wife likes me a lot, and she's so good to me.
But if I was a shitty dad, I'd be toast.
And so if I'm like, you only like me because I'm a good dad, that hurts.
That type of shit, and there's people there that, hey, listen,thena only likes me because i went and filmed her seminar good on her i'm glad i'm okay being liked for just filming her
seminar david weed you love yourself the most man come on That's true. Shouldn't everybody?
Back, back. I love myself.
Hold on. Let me suck my own dick. Everyone,
all you bitches get back. Hold on. Let me suck it first.
No, no.
How dare you?
CK Kevin,
I love you because it gives me
something to do on my drives to work
Good thing you're driving and typing at the same time
You jackass
Oh my goodness
There is a Slater
Seve the self sucker
There is a
I made this great I drew this amazing picture.
I wonder if I have it somewhere.
It's a yoga studio.
And on the door, it's a yogi and he's sucking his own penis and it's called Yogi Swallow My Chi.
And it was like a
picture i drew in college i wonder if i still have that that would be incredible to look at
yeah i was quite i fancied myself as quite the uh artist i bet i can find something like that
in this house the shattuckin the shattuckin i i don't book clients three to five p.m daily 99
percent of the time so i can watch this podcast that's all what kind of clients
he's a coach
uh chris beecherfield the three plane brothers video this morning was so great the life lessons
in it are too many to speak about um so what I'm doing uh Chris is I'm uh I'm trying to consolidate
all these libraries does anyone know about synology I want to get one of those math I
tried this before so I have these hundred terabyte drives on the property, but they're connected to each other physically, and it's where I duplicate all my stuff.
But I want to have one that's on the Wi-Fi network, a Synology drive.
And so right now I'm consolidating a bunch of footage, and I found this.
This is Avi ā I don't know what year this is.
He's probably two.
And he's asking for help, and I'm just filming him.
I'm not even helping him.
But the real cool part is you're going to see him do a muscle-up here,
a negative muscle-up.
This is nuts right here.
I'm so impressed by this.
Bam.
That was nice, right?
Yeah, that was very impressive.
Boom.
I can't believe he's wearing shoes. That's yeah. It was very impressive. Boom. I can't believe he's wearing shoes.
That's disgusting.
Anyway,
if anyone wants to DM me about,
they are,
I know it doesn't even,
the Velcro doesn't even go over the top of his foot.
What is it?
Like his toe is like completely shredded off.
Like he's been holding,
like he's been dragging it while he's skating or something.
Like his parents.
He probably was.
He used to ride one of those, those uh those bikes where you run on it oh yeah
yeah uh toby uh craft yes i built three 200 byte uh synologies i can help oh that's awesome so
what's up you just i just hook it up to the wi-fi network and i just keep all my like like i want to
keep like eye photo and stuff on there because I I have these three different areas around the house where I have the computers and I want my
computer in my main house in the studio to have access to the same photos the same apps
dude uh Matt terrible parenting dude um yesterday I was so John Young told me about a drink he had called Ghost.
And yesterday, while Avi was playing tennis, I went across the street real quick to the store to get him something to eat.
And they had a ghost in the fridge, so I bought one.
And I was on the phone with Hiller and he's like, dude, get the raspberry.
It tastes just like blah, blah.
And when I came back and drank it, one of the parents is like, you know, this is like she was kind of joking, but she's kind of serious. She's like dude get the raspberry tastes just like blah blah and when i went came back and drank it one of the parents is like you know this is like she was kind of joking but she's kind of
serious she's like this is really disappointing i basically thought of you as just like a health
nut i'm like sorry those are good though those ghosts it was good it was good sour patch kids
blue raspberry yeah yeah i think that's what it was.
Yes, it was a Blue Raspberry or something.
He's like, get the blue one.
I just got my energy bill 545 for AC this month.
Don't move to Texas.
Fuck.
I noticed the bangs don't say cretin around the top anymore.
Oh, yeah. i wonder if they
took it out or something makes me not want to ever drink one of those again yeah i drink for
the creatine anyway the creatine i just want to get buff the ghosts are hard to find they're only
like certain gas stations um uh this was in the health food store
so so he might play today
yeah
that's exciting and I
I think I can
that's an evening game
I think I can um
uh
I think I'm gonna go to home I think I can I think I'm gonna go to home
I think I can watch it
what would I type in NFL
yeah I looked up like Bears vs. Commanders
let's see
it's on Fox
and Amazon Prime.
Oh, it's not on YouTube because I have the YouTube one.
Probably not.
Oh.
I think Amazon Prime is...
Blocked in your area, Pittsburgh, Baltimore?
Baltimore?
A Sunday? Sunday, Sunday.
Who do they play?
Washington Commanders.
It's probably in the East Coast, Fox region thing.
Good thing I spent 450 bucks on this so I could watch Tyson play,
and now I can't even figure out how to play him.
You'll probably watch it through there, too.
I don't even...
Look at the...
I'm going to share the screen with you.
I don't even see it, dude.
Look at it.
Those are all Sundays games.
Oh, it says it's on Prime on the top. that's fucked up where where does it say that in the oh
shit how are you gonna oh that's super fucked so i just spent 450 bucks on this and now i have to
go over to prime and watch it i have prime i have amazon primes that shit that like when they mail
you packages it comes faster.
I have that.
So I can watch a football game if I have that.
Fast packages.
All right, fuck it.
I'm going to go to Amazon right now.
And then just type in NFL into the search bar?
Yeah, it's probably going to be one of the first things that pops up when you go to Amazon Prime.
Okay.
Look at it.
Wow, this is cool.
You know your shit.
Look, it says it's included with Prime.
That's so silly, though.
The NFL net, like, you pay for the NFL package
and they're going to stream it somewhere else.
Like, I would expect you pull up the NFL package
and you'd be able to watch all of them, any of them.
That's cool. At least be able to watch all of them. Any of them. That's cool.
At least be able to watch it.
Look at there's an age on it.
Seven plus years old.
You can only watch football if you're over seven years old.
I guess that's what they're saying.
It's a very violent sport.
You know,
it's crazy.
Football is really violent,
but you kind of, you don't get you don't
really feel it when you watch it on tv no even when i was in high school and college i would be
on the sidelines for those games and even then like people get fucked up it's like a car crash
every time somebody hits you yeah uh watching nfl is a I agree. That's why I'm watching Tyson Bajan.
We talked about, oh, we talked about that guy who pulled the fire alarm, right?
Yeah.
Let me see if there's anything pertinent.
I'm going to erase this Ty Jenkins stuff, erase Athena stuff.
You ever seen a guy with a turban and a hard hat on at the same time?
No.
Me neither.
I've seen ā how do you do that?
You ever seen a lady with a hajib working at a construction site with a hard hat on?
You ever seen a hajib with a hard hat on? Is ever seen a hijab with a hard hat on?
Is that the ninja outfit's a hijab?
Am I saying it right?
I think it's a hijab, yeah.
You ever seen a hijab lady with a hard hat?
No.
Alright.
Dude, I got some... Hijab. Sorry job oh i have all of these things i want i'm trying to
get dawn on the show and i have all these things now like piling up in my show notes like don't
show until after dawn comes on you know what i mean so like mikey swoosh doesn't report me or
something yeah yeah you should ask him about it if he comes on i have like some i have this uh You know what I mean? So like Mikey swoosh doesn't report me or something. Yeah. Yeah.
You should ask him about it.
If he comes on,
I have like some,
I have this,
uh, there's this video going around of Anne Hathaway singing a Tupac song.
It's so great.
Oh my God.
It's so great.
Travis,
what's up,
Mr.
Sellout,
Mr.
Pfizer boy.
Did you see the picture of him and Taylor Swift going around having sex?
And it's her.
She's carrying him.
They're having stand-up sex and she's carrying him.
Oh, that's awesome.
Yeah.
Okay.
What is it?
Travis, what are you doing?
Travis Kelsey.
Man, what are you doing?
The Vax data confirmed that it's not safe or effective and that it's even dangerous for certain groups,
especially for young athletes. And you're using your platform to promote this stuff?
Was it part of some deal to date a pop star and get an extra check? Man, I'm tired of all these
Mickey Mouse celebrities destroying the next generation with their propaganda. We need
warriors to build the next generation, men and women, not weak, fake influencers that are willing
to promote a destructive agenda to please corporate giants.
You're misleading the public and you're selling your soul.
Oh, you're definitely doing two things at once.
Huh, two things at once?
Ask about getting this season's COVID-19 shot when getting your flu shot.
Travis Kelsey.
What a douche nozzle.
Hey, did he really wear a Bud Light necklace?
I don't know. That might have been somebody else.
A Bud Light necklace.
Yep, it was him.
Oh, my God.
You found the picture?
Yeah.
Wow.
That's the same dude?
Yep.
It sucks because it's a pretty cool necklace.
Yeah, it's pretty cool.
Oh, my God.
This guy is a loser.
Does he have kids?
No. I wonder have kids? No.
I wonder what his parents think.
I mean, you still gotta love your son.
I think his parents are divorced.
They talked about it in the movie that they made about him.
The other thing, the other thing, that flag, the pedo flag, I need to change the name of it.
The other thing that the pedo flag, it's a def the pedo flag it's a defund the police it's a defund the police flag
it's a i hate fitness flag it's a um i hate people who uh hunters flag it's like it's just this this
whole everything that's wrong with society it like encompasses. It's like the rallying flag of just,
of,
of,
I really don't want to be like David Sutcliffe right now,
but it's the rallying call of just all things evil.
It's the rallying call of just gross stuff.
John Clark.
I bet they love how rich their son is.
I mean,
like when he sends the jet over to their local airport to bring them to the christmas dinner yeah they i agree they love that
savvy did you speak to nick uh
uh nick who would like move in on everyone's girlfriends and um in college i have not spoken to to nick
my wife was laughing i came in the house and she was laughing and i knew she was
listening to that part
i knew it.
This is, this is, this is what, when I see that, um, the, that flag with all those weird colors on it and like that thing that looks like a quarter of a swastika.
This is, this is what I think of.
This is what I think.
Individual justice and says everyone involved in the looting will be looked at on a case-by-case basis. We'll look carefully to see whether this is a one-off situation and they're fundamentally law-abiding people.
Hold them accountable one way or whether they are criminals.
And they're all about taking advantage of some sort of unrest
for their own benefit and they will be prosecuted another way.
They're trying to figure out whether these are fundamentally good people.
And this is just a one off or if they're bad people.
What's crazy is, is people are fundamental.
I think I think people are fundamentally good, period.
This is this is all falls under that flag, people.
For me, I'm just telling you, that's why, like like i don't attribute it to being to genitalia
at all who's gonna tell you you want your mouth anymore calls it individual justice and says
everyone involved in the looting will be looked at on a case-by-case basis we'll look carefully
to see whether this is a one-off situation and they're fundamentally law-abiding people
hold them accountable one way or whether they are criminals and they're all about taking advantage of some sort of unrest for their own benefit and they will be prosecuted.
Now you can commit crimes if you're fundamentally a good person.
So if I go out and commit a crime, I will not be held accountable.
Well, you are a citizen.
Yeah, you're fundamentally a good citizen.
It's crazy.
Yeah, it's cool.
No worries.
Athena, good morning.
Athena, there's something I have to tell you.
I have been using you.
You are only my friend because you are a savvy businesswoman, an overachiever,
and because I like that you have a seminar that's helping cure the world's most vexing problem
for those who are in serious need
of it i'm sorry that's the only reason why i like you and i know it's shallow of me but i've come
to terms with it and that's why i like you and i'm using you because i i i want to be around great
people and overachievers use me okay fine thank you i feel liberated getting that off my chest
incredible
and I
I'll leave it at that
I completely and when you smile
you may have a nice smile but that's not why I like you
hour and 40 minutes I'm gonna have a
Garrett Clinton has a podcast now
with her with her wife
and
they're gonna have she was telling me yesterday I was chatting with her and she told me about this guest that they're going to have. She was telling me yesterday.
I was chatting with her.
And she was telling me about this guest.
That they're going to have on from.
Gays Against Groomers.
I think that's the organization this person's from.
Don't quote me on that.
But I'm dying to see that podcast.
When she's done with it.
And then I want to have her back on.
To talk about it.
It's good shit
what is this
it's your podcast
oh I can't show this
oh that oh sorry
oh yeah oh glittin things
okay
do I subscribe to that
uh youtube uh how did you find that so fast you just typed
in glinton glinton yeah i just looked her up and then it was on she has a link to it in her
instagram subscribe look did it just refresh did it just go to 21 subscribers I just subscribed to it
bam there you go
shit they're doing it
do they have any live shows
oh shit they're doing live shows
they did one yesterday
oh good on her
oh shit
listen to these topics
Taylor Swift, Travis Kelsey
Tupac arresting Tupac case.
These are things I like.
Tide Pods, the rise of Andrew Hiller.
They interviewed John Woolley.
Dang.
Don't mind if I do.
Don't mind if I do.
Peruse this one. What the fuck is going on here
oh
so we did that review of
the Dave Castro weekend review show and the volume
was too low on Dave's video
so we have to learn how to turn the video
up but I also thought of something else if we can't learn
how to turn his video up we could turn all of
our volumes down so that everyone at home has to turn their shit up so that it's all
level sure right yeah okay here we go uh i'm gonna start in the middle somewhere strategic thinking
as they are now you know so i think it's totally great to let them strategize as long as you're
hitting a minimum work requirement.
Well, that was kind of ā and I just wonder if that's kind of what CrossFit's battling.
Dude, she kind of looks like Shelby Neal.
She's Shelby Neal Black, right?
She's got the freckles and the big blue eyes.
Garrett or the ā
Garrett.
Oh, yeah.
No, the other chick on the right is just a whitey.
Colleen.
I feel like they need that.
I feel like...
If I had any balls, I'd shave my head that short on the sides as Glintons.
You would?
Yeah.
I think I'm going to soon.
Dave Driscoll had his shave that short too.
It'll grow back if I don't like it, right?
Yeah, sure.
Kenneth DeLapp, one of those people are black.
Yeah.
Yes.
They need those polarizing people
to drive those narratives and those storylines,
whether good, bad, indifferent, whatever,
but it still kind of makes the sport does that make sense
yeah and i think they're starting to get that ricky garard's a good example of someone who's
coming in with some fire and history you know and can can be very loud and has in in his past has
said you know kind of real brash things which is again totally fun and cool and ricky has has
ricky said brash things he hasn't right shit and cool and ricky has has ricky said brash
things he hasn't right shit i don't think so i've never heard him say anything he's crazy mellow
though right yeah that's right to do so i'm not criticizing it's just like he's he's got a fiery
kind of competitor young guy yeah just hungry yeah yeah and like and you don't get like no no no no i
mr woolly i disagree um uh ricky's more like an alligator just sunning on the side of the beach on, you know, on shore, like half in the water, half out.
And you can't even tell if it's alive, but you still don't go close to it because it'll snap your head off.
Ricky is chill, right?
He's not loud and brash or anything.
He popped for roids.
Vellner's the kind of opposite of that.
And I hate to use those two as a comparison
because they have the history but yeah but you know velner's like kind and funny and and charming
and when he finishes the workout he's joking and you know so i think it's good to have some people
in the sport that are going to bring a different edge to it and and i don't agree with that but
velner's way louder than ricky ricky is so kind and mellow and velner talks so
much more shit oh yeah how about that shit he talked to lazar that was great yeah it's a sport
you want it to have viewability yeah it doesn't have viewability the sport's gonna die like there
has to be you know castro says it it's got to be a spectacle yeah you know and so you need it so
well it's got to have affiliates behind it.
Um, but I do think you've got to, you know, find these moments and, and better define
sportsmanship, you know, it's one thing to be out there and say, come on, let's go run.
You want to run with me?
Let's run.
Yeah.
Like, I think that, you know, I'll give you a story, a story of things that fires that
like I played basketball.
So if a girl elbowed me too hard in the chest, I'd be like well you're about to eat it after this time out because yeah yeah i get it
we're gonna lock up and we're gonna go but it elbows you in the titties chick elbows me in the
chest let me uh that's me she meant if she chick elbows me in the titties caleb really yeah it's a
sport where that's not required and that's not a thing. I, it's not required to elbow someone in the titties.
I personally don't feel like the,
the touching thing is appropriate.
You know what I mean?
It just doesn't,
you don't do it in golf.
You don't do it in tennis.
You don't,
you know,
there's no,
you don't do it in sweat.
Like there's millions of sports.
You don't do it.
Wow.
No touching in golf.
That's true.
You watch the Tiger woods touches opponent. Yeah. Hand, hand touching in golf. That's true. You watch Tiger Woods touch his opponent?
Yeah, hand him a tampon.
Slipped him a tampon.
Do you remember that?
That was great.
That's right.
No touching in swimming.
What was the other sport she said?
That was just my...
Well, I think to your point,
in the beginning,
John, you were saying like any
track uh colleen's uh first appearance on the show first time talking 21 minutes into the show
i mean even just a regular track meet that you've seen you know outside of crossfit like there's
that initial start so there is that that chance for impacts and and being very close to each other
and you kind of you kind of have to hold your breath and kind of make your way through but
then once you make your way through and you're not surrounded by 10, 15 plus people to start with,
like it's not,
it's not a contact sport anymore.
Like it's an individual sport,
you know,
what's this,
uh,
Mr.
Schweitzer saying,
I'm from Clydesdale media.
What about the brawl at the Ryder cup last weekend?
What's the Ryder cup,
the U S versus the world or something.
What's the sport?
Oh,
the golf people got the golf
the players got into a fight
yeah I'm trying to find it right now
the actual dudes who swing the sticks
hit the balls those dudes fought
like Jack Nicholson and Tiger Woods fought people
yeah those guys
wow
wow they better hope that that
who's the crossfit they better hope Scott Stalling wasn't there
fucking mash somebody
Wow golf Wow US versus Europe Wow
What a great fighting Oh caddies it it was was it caddies fighting oh shit
i don't even what are you even arguing about rory mackleroy i think i heard of that dude
that guy's good right he's like a real it's not like some low-level player no you see the air quotes like i just used no let me see him again this you did this
oh yeah yeah yeah air quotes air quotes
was there any touching i don't even think so
any fingering
I don't even think he shoved him
hmm
that'd be cool to be there
and see that
golfers trying to fight
yeah
yeah it's
nothing burger
anyway
that's cool Garrett Clinton I'm not a subscriber
subscriber 21
a Mac now has access to your
iMessage and FaceTime
I hope that's one of my
computers I hope that's one of my computers.
That's always unsettling when your computer sends you something like that.
It's like when Instagram has another login.
I'm like, oh, shit.
Okay, I want to show you this.
This is one of those things that I didn't want to show you this i want to show you this this is one of those things that i didn't
want to show but i want to show you this and then i'm not going to show you the whole thing
we'll come back to this in a later show this is just a tease for another show
okay watch this like this this is crazy this is this is what uh instagram is for for create
different people are like dropping in letters into the chat.
Watch this.
It's the wrong.
Oh, shit. I love the persistence it's just good thing oh i'm fucking over
i'm a bad human being i know that's a great song it's so funny a tear dropped out of my eye and
landed on my nostril i wonder if regular people when a tear drops out of your eye if it just passes your nostril do your tears clear your nose
i know brandon waddell i like this the internet's undefeated you know it's that's one of the most
um uh appropriately used whenever i see that i'm like yeah like people don't overuse that one i feel like yeah i agree god that's just a bunch of people dude that's just like group just
like those are all different people dropping letters like that wasn't like coordinated that
was just like oh man, that was great.
All right.
I wasn't supposed to show that whole thing.
That's why my first 10 years of having sex, I always premature ejaculated.
Well, it wasn't premature for me.
I just can't stop once I start. All right.
Send it to HQ Tell them
Try to
What's it called
Try to Lauren Fisher me
Okay
Thank you everyone
Is today Thursday
Oh there's a shut up and scribble show
Let's do our call
this call never works anyway
should we call
I'm going to call
oh I don't even have my phone here
I don't even know Taylor's number
you want me to give it to you
or you got it
oh here it is here's my phone
what do you think about my case
haven't you always had that
yeah do you like it yeah i'm more of a clear guy oh no my wife just sent me a picture of my kids
watching the show shit oh my god so good uh uh good thing they can't read they literate
uh uh it's taylor's self let me see Uh, I think they can't read. They literate, uh, uh,
it's Taylor's self. Let me see.
I seen, I tried it.
They were making fun of me the other day cause I don't watch the show.
It's like, dude, I try to promote the show at least.
And you guys never answer.
Someone's like, someone can reverse play.
There's a machine where someone can figure out what the number is by the buttons you're pushing.
I'm like, oh, great.
Well, I gave my number out on yesterday's show.
Fuck it.
I hope they talk about something good this week.
The numbers weren't like all-time high numbers last week.
They were having some huge shows, and then they talked about Crash Crucible, and the show plummeted.
Damn. Just saying. high numbers last week. They were having some huge shows and then they talked about Crash Crucible and the show plummeted.
Damn.
Just saying.
The Burpee Dude, I don't think there's such a thing as
illiterate Ashkenazi Jews.
That's true. They came out fucking
Taylor from SMTPPC
programming.
I'm coaching because that's all I do with my life.
I just coach, coach, coach.
I'm JR.
I can't talk.
I'm with my kids and I prioritize my kids first.
You mean me?
Six, four.
You ever talk?
Yeah.
Every time I talk to JR on the phone, it ends with like so what do you think about, oh yeah, and he'll be
going off, oh sorry, my kid's leaving me, bye.
And then he just hangs up.
Committed motherfucker.
No exit runway.
No like, well, hey, my kid's kind of
loud, or hey, I gotta tend to my kid.
I respect it.
Yeah, I respect it too.
I know I'm going to be on the phone with JR for
like a period of time
Hi you reached JR Howell I'm the primary contact for CrossFit Crash
I'm the primary contact for CrossFit Crash
And right now I'm changing someone's diaper
Staring at my hot wife
Thank you
He'd be a great moil
You have foreskin one second
A moil's like the dude who cuts the foreskin off
You got it one second
You don't the next second
Snip
Have you ever seen the tool they use to cut foreskin off
Yes
When I was in
Tech school we had
We worked in the labor and delivery
Inpatient clinic
And I got to watch like two or three of them
Oh Did you see any ever go bad You see any botched circumcisions inpatient clinic and we i got to watch like two or three of them oh
do you see any ever go bad you see any botched circumcisions no they were all
normal successful i guess yeah did you ever see where they had to where they would tie the baby
down no oh oh yeah you don't want to see the machine. If you haven't seen the machine, you don't want to see the machine that does it.
Did your mom ever have that thing?
Did you ever see that thing where, like, women use it?
It's like a metal thing, and it, like, presses your eyelashes, like, curves them up.
Have you ever seen one of those?
Yeah.
Yeah.
That kind of reminds me of the circumcision machine.
Snipper, kind of.
I mean, just with theā¦
Yeah.
That's probably about as close as you would get
it's like a relative of it distant distant relative yeah yeah
yeah clark i keep my foreskin in my wallet
you can get um uh wallets made of foreskins.
And they're really cool because when you rub them, they grow.
What the fuck?
That was good, right?
Great.
It's okay.
You buy a wallet, it turns into a suitcase.
All right. Thanks, guys. You buy a wallet, turns into a suitcase Alright, thanks guys Tomorrow
Tomorrow, tomorrow's Friday
Oh, Travis Mayer's tomorrow
Travis Mayer, Devin Kim
And then the CrossFit Games Update show
With uh
Grundler
Will be making his debut on the CrossFit Games Update show with Grundler.
Grundler will be making his debut on the CrossFit Games Update show.
He hasn't been on the show in a long time.
And, no, no, he was on the first CrossFit Games Update show, I think.
Or maybe second. I don't remember.
Anyway, Grundler will be on with John Young, of course. And, uh...
Tyler? and Tyler no I think I kicked Tyler off this week
oh Taylor self again wow
did I already say Taylor Taylor
Grunler and John Young oh it's gonna be fun
yeah yeah
oh yeah that was crazy did you see this uh
did you see this post i made with uh john young did you post it uh with him eating cookies
yeah yeah yeah i saw that we should i'm gonna we should finish the show with that
oh yes the music's great right it's yeah it's good
I just typed oh you got it
damn faster than me I just typed in
sinister
oh for the
song choice yeah that's how I got it Really, really what's really what this post is about is I've anointed John as the senior analyst
at the Sevan podcast show.
Thank you.
Thank you, Philip.
That's at like one and a half speed
or something. That's like
sped up. It makes it look so much
worse than it is. Good.
It's still bad.'t ruin don't ruin
my story it yeah i agree shoving cookies in his mouth he needs to be put down immediately like Yikes Wow Mike Poolboy
John Young eats that cookie
Like I eat ass
See you guys tomorrow
Don't forget to watch the Shut Up and Scribble show in a few minutes
Bye bye