The Sevan Podcast - Kill Taylor Ep. 14 | You Workout, We Give Money

Episode Date: July 27, 2024

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Tires up. Bam, we're live. Welcome to the greatest show on the planet. At least YouTube. Still count. Our first victim is gone. Taylor Self is here. The next victim is waiting in the wing. No, we're having Murphy! Murphy! Murphy! Murphy! Murphy! Oh my God!
Starting point is 00:00:28 What's this? It's blind, relentless, constant, and smooth exhalation. That's what we're doing. In just a couple minutes, we'll see the fittest man in the world, Taylor Self, do a workout, and you can call in the number, don't call in sorry text the number I'll send you a link and you can do the workout and try to beat them and win the money and then you don't win the Money and the money rolls over to the next week this show is brought to you by better nutrition Better nutrition is an online nutrition coaching company that helps CrossFit athletes lose body fat and gain muscle the girl who runs this
Starting point is 00:01:00 Website is hot She does it without tracking macros We help people create healthy habits around food and show them how to use food as your specific goals. And who doesn't love a hot girl telling you how to eat? Right? Or doing anything really. Honestly the best.
Starting point is 00:01:16 We like hot girls. We also partner with CrossFit affiliates who want outsourced nutrition coaching. That's smart. That is the base of the pyramid. We save affiliate owners time. That's smart. Drive up affiliate revenue even better and ultimately give each member the accountability and knowledge they need to make long-lasting
Starting point is 00:01:31 results and the girl who helps you is really hot. Affiliate owners and crossword athletes at the Better Vision Nutrition on Instagram. Oh what gives you a huge head? In the bio. She just look at her. Oh, Head Start. I thought you were going to read that. What gives you a huge head? My son likes huge heads. I love huge heads. I like everything about head. Okay, by the way, if you would like 40% off of FIDAID, find the logo on the screen,
Starting point is 00:01:56 point your phone at the QR code, click it, and you can get your 40% discount. Also, if you would like to know how Taylor got so fit you can have Taylor train you Sentinel training 14 day free trial explosive growth I by the way I would sign up sooner than later because he's starting to turn into an arrogant prick and it's getting harder and harder to get In touch with him starting just now starting barely. He's 1% his 1% of the way One to Brian friend, where's he at? He's not even on the scale.
Starting point is 00:02:26 Okay. Thanks for ruining my story. Taylor's the most humble guy you'll ever meet. Love the guy. If you would like to make it to the Paralympics, feel free to chop off your finger and you too can make it to the Olympics. Okay Bryson. Yo.
Starting point is 00:02:40 We're going to look at the workout. Got it. Here we go. We're going to look at it and then we're gonna tell Taylor to do it. Six-minute AMRAP, week 14, 12 bar complexes. What's a bar complex? A bar complex is a toes to bar to a gymnastics, kipping chest to bar pull-up. Then 18 bench press at 135 for the boys, 95 for the girls, and 24 alternating dumbbell
Starting point is 00:03:01 snatches, 50 for the boys, 35 for the girls. Oh my God, a girl can beat him this week. so this is this is a this is girls week $500 on the line it can be very difficult to get in all participants will win a free case a fit it hey do I bet Tim Murray would smoke him on this workout all right Bryson we're ready when you range of motion I had to wait wait so much time getting up the bar though. God. I loved it You think Taylor can go unbroken all these sets of bench. I go in 10. Oh, yeah, Caleb clock baby chest Five
Starting point is 00:03:40 Just we pale. Are we across the shore? Yes. And we're off. You can tell by the boxes. It'd be it'd be John. Please watch Taylor's bar complex. I have a feeling he's going to be a stickler without not allowing kipping. So please watch how he's doing this. For some reason he's added in some no butterfly or something
Starting point is 00:04:07 No double tap. Yeah, no double tap Just once in the morning nothing at night. Oh The double tap would be interesting. It would be fun It's cuz he can't do it and doesn't want to get beaten that is exactly why he doesn't He looks we need to show sep on what a double is after this 40. I know what a double tap is I'm an expert on the double tap two three four five six When did he get off the bar forty five thirty nine thirty nine? Okay, Tyler you doing splits? Yeah, that'll be helpful Taking a rest on the bench
Starting point is 00:04:42 So we think you're broken first round doesn't go unbroken. And someone said yes. That was you Tyler. 105 off the bench. And we're off to the races. I'm like John Young on bench. I just assume everybody can do what I can do. So when people call in, what are we going to do?
Starting point is 00:05:02 After like a couple of rounds if they're way off pace are they done? Yeah, or they have an automatic six-minute window. Oh fuck not the whole six minutes. We're only 14 episodes in we just still don't know What we're doing, right? That would be 100 episodes in I have 39 then 105 and now Now what? One two two oh six. He's now that's too far. He's flying. He is flying. He did break up the bench press though. He did. I think he's going too slow. He
Starting point is 00:05:37 looks too relaxed. This is a six minute workout. That's twice he's looked over at Bryson. I wonder what's going on. Bryson, why does he keep looking over at you Bryson has his dick because I don't have my shirt on And you make most people look away At the top of the screen you have Tyler Watkins from the heat one app giving away $10,000 at the CrossFit Games download the heat One app now best best and best way to celebrate the games below him coffee pods and wads very own in the dark Pedro white Andrew Hiller from Hiller fit Everyone knows who who he is, the biggest needle mover in the space, the biggest influencer in the space, the smartest guy in the space, and he watches
Starting point is 00:06:10 too much TV. And below me, C. Beaver. What a weird thing. All those things and he watches too much TV. Usually he does have to take a sentence. I think Taylor's getting too fat. Look at the barb in on that. That's the Camille bar
Starting point is 00:06:28 239 Hey, have you guys ever seen Rob Orlando do one-armed Fran? Oh that transition was small Sorry, it's not small long not fast one-armed Fran. Yeah, dude The bar made me think about it because when Rob does it on that bar, it's like a dowel. It's this big old wood thing. Oh Nelly, oh Nelly, blood in the water. He's got these bird boobs. He's got like no breasts. Bird boobs. Little baby bird boobs.
Starting point is 00:06:57 Blood in the water. He's got great triceps. Yeah, he's all arms, no chest I guess. 315. That's why his position so good. He's got no chest. We're in the second round. The workout is a six minute an wrap. It's a toes to bar complex with a chest to bar pull up then some bench press and some dumbbell snatches.
Starting point is 00:07:23 Let's go Taylor. Let's go baby. Let's go Taylor. How do you think Rich's overhead mobility is so good even though he has the best pecs on earth. Great question. He took a scaffold to like that muscle where the leg connects to the humerus so they can just throw his arm over. Oh gotcha. His chest is the only thing keeping it in place. Nice. Yeah, I asked him. It was wicked, right? 407. He's in the oh, that's a long break. Wow. What's going on, Taylor? Are you sick?
Starting point is 00:08:02 Wow What's going on Taylor you sick Or just shit Shit third round. This is where we're gonna see a lot of people Peter out but not Taylor self see he's getting unmotivated He's like it's only $500 and this is where he loses $500. Would you be more mad if you lost $500 or 3,000? I like he's gonna lose anything wins He's not losing anything. He's not losing anything. That's not
Starting point is 00:08:32 yet. Oh **** Oh **** Hey, does Joe Biden have COVID? Yeah, I did. Did you know Ariel Lowen trains in her garage? No, I just read this comment by Cave the the- you know he picked it I'm just so much fitter than I am and I am way better than bench press but. I have a feeling if you were broken up the bar complexes these go
Starting point is 00:09:35 Taylor. Like that. Home improvement. Two peeking over the fence three. Four or five Three, four, five. Time. Five. Wow. Five reps in the third round for Taylor Self. Good job, Taylor. You didn't suck that bad.
Starting point is 00:09:56 I wonder if he had any idea that that bench press was gonna, that those toes to bar to chest were going to affect his bench press like that. Toes to chest? He knew. His toes to chest. I wonder if he knew that the toes to bar and then the chest to bar pull-up was going to affect his bench press like that.
Starting point is 00:10:15 Hey, can you put your toes in your mouth? Any? No, no, never could. I can put yours in my mouth for a good price. I can not. I want everyone to think about that for a minute. Bryson! You and Peter Stoves? Bryson, what happened with the bench press? Why did you break it up so much? What blew up? Was that unexpected?
Starting point is 00:10:38 No, he knew he was going to break from the beginning. He changed a lot there. What about that toes-to-bar and chest-to-bar pull pull up makes it so bench press just shits the bed? I think it's more the other way around probably just all that blood accumulation in your shoulders and chest from the bench press makes it hard to get all the way to the chest to bar. But he already but he broke up the first round of Brent benchpress. Well, yeah, he didn't have to break out the first round, but he knew he should
Starting point is 00:11:09 break up. Sure. Okay. All right. Here, if you want to hear how's his mood, how's his mood? Is he pissed? 11 plus seven. He knew ask him be like, how's your mood?
Starting point is 00:11:21 How's your mood, dude? What is that? How he's going to break with the bench? Okay, lots of lots of text messages going coming in I would love to see Saxon Panjic whoop up on Taylor to put this small chest off the bed First link is out Jeremy world Wow, our first person to text in just gets 500 wow oh wow well we need to see someone else go to find out what's going on here where is he is he in pain he's over by the fan are you guys at CrossFit Charlotte? Yes.
Starting point is 00:12:05 Awesome. What's that giant green thing next to Taylor? That long green thing. It's a bench. It's the back rest of a bench. Seating bench. Okay guys, when we come back, you will see someone go for the $500,
Starting point is 00:12:19 tons of people loaded up and ready to go. it up and ready to go. There's there's no magic here to getting you out of that mindset of focusing on how you look. But an affiliate is, in my opinion, by far the best place to help you with that shift. Before starting at the gym, I was somebody who just always wanted to be smaller and I always wanted to like look a certain way and I was never never satisfied with my body. All my goals were focused around all of my exercise was like how do I get as small as possible and so I was like super unhealthy. Like I wasn't eating and
Starting point is 00:13:01 all sorts of stuff. Unfortunately like when I had gotten really bad, Megan had me join here. So it was very quickly that I was like okay well if I want to like lift with all of these other girls and if I want to like keep up with them and if I want to be strong and all those things like I like that this has this has to switch it was like within six months I like realized that switch where it was like all the sudden on my Instagram feed instead of like tiny little people I had like these strong Beautiful capable women that could lift hundreds of pounds so this for me has been a whole mindset shift of like I
Starting point is 00:13:42 now appreciate my body for what it can do. Not what it looks like in here. We don't care what you look like as long as you're hitting what you what you want to achieve. affiliate contest in full motion. We don't care what you look like. Oh, but we do love your shirt. Sebastian. What's up, dude? Sebastian? What's up, guys? What's up, Andrew? How you doing?
Starting point is 00:14:08 Sebastian, are there a lot of flies where you're at? I see stuff buzzing around. Kind of. I got the garbages right here. Oh, okay. And is that your house? Are you a first-time homeowner? That looks like a first-time purchase. It's, uh, we rent from my mother-in-law. Oh okay and it looks like something. Oh yeah. Looks like where Pedro lives. Yeah we got a cool garage set up. A shithole? Kind of tanky and dirty but we love it. Are those bags of cement on the ground in there? Yeah yeah. Are those for working out with or is that a project that's like kind of just in limbo? It's a project I'm gonna add to this rig here and I gotta make some concrete forms for it so. And where is that are you in Compton? Might as well
Starting point is 00:14:50 be no it's Waukesha Wisconsin. Waukesha Wisconsin all right dude do you have any chance to beat him? Yeah yeah yeah. Oh Sebastian's got a shot this dude's fit. When you saw him break up the bench press did you start chuckling inside yeah okay what is that bench press that's Devon bench for Abhi it's regulation I get scared when I go heavy on this thing oh no dude you're fucked is that an incline bench can we see your dumb where's your dumbbell at okay that's fine you don't have that's fine we've okay I just wanted to see Is that an incline bench? Can we see your dumb? Where's your dumbbell at? Okay, that's fine. You don't have that's fine. We've okay. I just wanted to see where's that. Okay. All right We're ready when you are. We're ready when you are. Good luck, dude. Oh, don't drop it. Don't drop anything on the kid Okay, okay, so you have unprotected sex is that your kid yeah
Starting point is 00:15:46 sex. Is that your kid? Yeah. I see. I see. Not my kid. I like all the little mini lawns he's got there besides his bench. Does that guy have a black eye? He was going to bench for me. If you have a black eye, no. Oh, okay. I thought maybe his left eye had a black eye. All right.
Starting point is 00:16:04 A black eye. guy. All right. A black guy? All right. All right. Caleb, you ready? Ready. All right. Here we go. The first attempt, Sebastian from Compton. Do you want me to count down? Sure. You can count down. All right. Three, two, one. 39 seconds is what he needs to come up on these. This is the weirdest thing ever. the thirty-nine seconds is what he needs to come up on these.
Starting point is 00:16:32 Already. And the handle on the how Andy got a haircut. What is he bald shirt and dynamics yeah look at him on his bike bike And you look like a woman with that shirt on All right, well that's a perfect biking shirt good luck turned out so good last time Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. Wow. Is that his local yellows guy?
Starting point is 00:17:05 I was going to go kick himself in the head. He's behind pace. 43. That's all right. The limit is 24 miles. Oh, dad. Andy. Taylor, what's he feeling?
Starting point is 00:17:17 What's he feeling? Is he already tripping? Oh, wow. Hey, you have to do 18. What are you doing? 18. 18. Time to go back. Yeah wow. Hey, you need to be at. Oh, he even moved his foot onto the platform. I was about to say that was going to be a little two. Wow. Nice. 157. This is
Starting point is 00:17:45 what he needs to be at. Oh, he even moved his foot onto the platform. I was about to say that was going to be a little easier. I got an was the first round Tyler? idea kid. That's like most in CrossFit gyms these days. I swear to god.
Starting point is 00:18:07 How do I just scream go faster? I heard Lincoln Brown tell Jen Smith one time, can you go faster but spend less energy? I was like you've got to be shitting me. 156 is when Taylor was done with the snatches. Only three seconds. 159. He caught up. No chance. I don't know dude. He literally did not catch up at all. Oh he caught up. He caught up. He was not the bassist. It's a snack on a bench press dude. I believe in you C. Bass. Taylor did you have to break up the first round of bench press or you just did it by choice? I could have done it unbroken, but I would have had to. Oh, he's fucked.
Starting point is 00:18:49 Uh-oh. I can just second round. Dude, you broke up the bench press. Dude, you had a snack when you were on the bench, dude. Eat a dick, dude. I had a snack. Yeah, you had a snack. You had time to rehydrate.
Starting point is 00:19:01 Oh. You were looking at Bryson the whole time. Oh, two breaks. Are we gonna make this suspens- Are we trying to add suspense to this or are we just gonna get it Bryson the whole time. Oh, two breaks. Are we going to make this suspicion? Are you are we trying to add suspense to this? We're just gonna boot him off to 39 throw this sea bass back. Another break. No, that's smart. Yeah, he's gonna crash the bench. He's gonna crush the bench. Yeah. 18. Let's go Sebastian. If you want a CEO shirt, go to VNDk 8.com vindicate.com get your
Starting point is 00:19:27 Broken he's got you. Oh, yeah Wow now we're looking at trouble fix you guys quality reps though Hey, yeah, those are really good. Look at those triceps on a slant to what a problem the game. He's got a lot of the to come off as Tyler said at 407. Wow, he's close. He's close. Spoiler alert, he will not. My max bench is 305, which is not crazy, but it's not weak. And my best, I would say at 135 is really good. Hey Nick Fuji, shut the fuck up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:42 I don't even know what you said, but yeah. Yeah, do I. He only did 16 bench the last time, so should just be did he really John according to Caleb yeah he only did 16 on last okay they don't count so good in Compton all right all right All right. All right, Sebastian. Thank you. Beautiful family. Go get the ball. Go get it. Oh no.
Starting point is 00:21:09 Oh no. Marv, wrong Marv. I have work with you, Sebastian. Hey, you want to know something funny? I initially wrote this workout as a five minute AMRAP and it was supposed to be 10 complexes. Oh my god. Oh boy. He's been waiting another chance. He's wherever you've been.
Starting point is 00:21:36 Where have you been Colton? Where have you been? Waiting to answer my text and fucking pussy. With this big seven. Before you get to watch Colton do You fucking pussy. Who's been bleeding with his pig, Saban? Stop. Before you get to watch Colton do this workout, everyone go to FIT-AID. Everyone go to... Make sure you follow Better Version Nutrition.
Starting point is 00:21:55 Make sure you sign up for Sentinel Training. Okay. Where are you? Okay, so you got the platform for the toes to bar. Okay, here we go. Colton, do you know what the reps are? Oh, well, here we go. Colton, do you know what the reps are? Oh, well, well, 1824. Hey, frog grips. You can't use them, dude. They don't count. You scared of the frogs? Scared of the frogs. All right, Colton, we're ready when you are.
Starting point is 00:22:20 Well, my mother's so weird when he walks. What'd you say? What are we? Irish guy. Cause he's walking around. I said I'm getting fucked here. Hey, better version nutrition. I hope you guys are ready to Venmo. You think he's going to beat this, Taylor? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:22:35 Maybe. I think so, but maybe not. Colton can bench 425, dude. Can he really? Yeah. That's crazy. Colton, what's your max bench a lifetime PR? Before I tell you I'm gonna give you a bunch of excuses I
Starting point is 00:22:53 Went to that Bigfish Foundation's 30-hour Challenge by four weeks ago. Yeah, no my flights got delayed so I didn't get there so 2 a.m And where you started up at 5 a.m. The next day and the first event was a max bench And I hit 390 and I missed 405 Okay. All right, but Taylor can do that. Just so you know Taylor does that easy. Yeah, so you quit I was actually 392 Holy shit, I was guessing Colton. Are you in good? Are you are you've been staying in good shape? What the fuck you just asked me
Starting point is 00:23:30 Don't intimidate me I intimidate easy Colton what about that clean ladder that they programmed for the games Do you think that anyone when you tested that do you think I'm assuming you tested it did anyone do you think anyone of? The games will beat your time assuming you tested it, did anyone, do you think anyone at the games will beat your time? There's probably a lot of events in the opening that's going to be me, but the only testing that I've done so far is Dave actually came out here and we released 12 of my pigs into a cornfield and we had to catch them. And then after I did that, he decided it was easy so that we dumped bottles of his olive oil onto the pigs.
Starting point is 00:24:06 And then I had to catch him again. And then after I did that, he dumped a bottle of his olive oil onto me and Tudor. And then we had a wrestling match. Yeah. He's a hero. Listen, he's a hero. He's a hero. That's the hog I don't want to wrestle with.
Starting point is 00:24:21 That's not even anything to do with Dave. That's just a regular Thursday do with Dave. That's just a regular Thursday night in Merton's house. Yeah, when you wrestle to Tudor, did you ever grab his fifth arm? Specialized. Is that you? Alright, we're ready when you
Starting point is 00:24:37 are, buddy. Let's get it. Okay. Get a play on me. Wow. Okay, Caleb, you ready? Ready. Here we go for 500 bucks. Golden the one action 39 seconds is what he needs to come off on these He'd be off on 19 seconds Madeline Adams. I couldn't love Colton anymore That might not be about Colton I think that any of us that's good point Pedro specifically Pedro could be about Pedro specifically. there's one we can root at I'm noticing a little struggle already in that chest a bar he's just trying to make it interesting Taylor did you not want anyone to do that double tap what double tap the grid thing really move 38 seconds I've never tried
Starting point is 00:25:43 it so that's why I was like no I don't want to do that no one else can do it the grid thing really move 38 seconds. I've never tried it so that's why I was like no I don't want to do that. No one else can do either one oh five. No oh god you're screwed. Dude. sounds like a train going up the hill. I think he's I think he's
Starting point is 00:26:03 adding this on a little bit one minute. Wow, I was not at 105 Yeah, but that's crazy because you broke and you still came off that fast. I Love the fucking train sound There was I went a bit slow on the dumbbells purposefully because if I tried to rush I was gonna have to break away more. So we'll see if he implodes or not I went a bit slow cuz I'm going have these with Colton on the $500 My push-ups aren't as fast as that Colton's bench
Starting point is 00:26:30 What holding an Eros as well? Oh, he's slowing down a little bit even on the dumbbell snatches He's wearing those ESC sounds headphones So if anyone's make them laugh and put them off Taylor came off at 156 156 is the time to beat here Thanks for keeping it interesting cold. Holding the pace down. 146. Oh, he keeps making up five seconds each time. 239.
Starting point is 00:26:55 Did he do a total spread the first rep? Yeah, I fucked up. Be quiet. Oh, we gotta do 13. Did he do it? Did he forgot to? Yeah, he just did a chest spread. Yeah. He's just in a chest. Right. Yeah. We do a rep at the end.
Starting point is 00:27:07 Hey, I can see Sam Sue looks like a Sam's duke style. Colton Merton video where he talks the whole time he works out. It's so easy for him. Hey, so he does have to do an extra rep. Is anyone counting?
Starting point is 00:27:16 Who do you got? Kamala Harris or Trump? If you had to pick. Good job. Colton. 222. Yeah, sure. What? What? What are you talking about? you know, are you there? Anybody? Where was I? You were at three fifty.
Starting point is 00:27:50 Yeah, three fifteen. You'll notice when the dumbbell falls into Colton's hand, it's not too dissimilar from when he wrestled Tudor with olive oil. Oh, he wrestled Tudor with olive oil? Yeah. And his hog landed in his hand. But he's so used to handling hogs, it wasn't a big deal. Colton's hog landed in Tudor with olive oil. Yeah. And his hog landed in his hand, but he's so used to handling hogs. It wasn't a big deal.
Starting point is 00:28:06 Colton's hog landed in Tudor's mouth. Or Tudor's hog landed in Colton's butt. Which one? Both. Both simultaneously. I'm just doing everything I can to sabotage his performance. Taylor came off of these at 4.07. I think at this point we would have to kick Taylor off the show.
Starting point is 00:28:24 Yeah. See you, Taylor. Thanks for coming, man. Oh my goodness. Thanks for coming. Oh my God. He is slowing down. 334. Oh God. Damn. Johnny Young was going to call in. Oh, shut up, John Young. Johnny Young. You should still do it, John. John Young actually did this workout. He's on a competition. But he did this workout and he actually finished it in four minutes. So he has to do an extra one here too? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:56 Yeah. Four. Taylor came off at 459. Oh, Nelly. You suck. I can't believe you you broke didn't you break nah dude oh you didn't that was your first mistake yeah I did break after this we rewrite the workout to have one chest about started be trying oh boy
Starting point is 00:29:18 maybe it's good no it's not good because he's not gonna have to break the bench on all things. Oh yeah, that's a good point. Well, you don't know. Maybe he's totally imploded. 426. No way. He's gonna rip these I bet. He's hurting. He's hurting. 2-2. 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18.
Starting point is 00:29:55 He's now one minute ahead, basically. Whatever, man. Cheeky little look at the clock. He's like, I got four more rounds in me. All these guys who's getting the five. Cause John Young is going to call it a beat for sure. You got to hold on. There it goes. I'm pretty sure he could stop now and nobody was still beat him.
Starting point is 00:30:15 You don't think John Young would beat him, dude? John Young's not going to call him. John Young can't do a toes to bar. John Young's also in a female division with his ditties, but. toes to bar. John Young's also in a female division with his ditties but... Guys, not only does better nutrition, better version nutrition help you with your nutrition without counting macros, you can hire them to help your entire affiliate. Jonathan Ortega, ooh Taylor gets cream pie'd again. Jonathan Ortega's back to envisioning two men doing sexual favors for one another.
Starting point is 00:30:46 That's actually auto correct. He meant to type my mom gets cream pie'd again. Three complete rounds. That's right. My mom. What? Huh? What is cream pie'd?
Starting point is 00:30:56 Ah. Where there's jizzum. You wouldn't get it. Exuding from your orifice. You wouldn't get it, Taylor. You wouldn't get it. Two. Time.
Starting point is 00:31:03 Time. Time rolling. Time. Cheese, Louise. Three'm I'm going fine. Cheese Louise three books to call you're a beast. Do you want to keep going to the next person calls in or fucking wrap it up. Everybody.
Starting point is 00:31:22 Definitely only going to do rope climbs in London for the next six weeks. Oh my goodness. Hey, here's the thing. I'm not in a very good mood today. It's kind of my general disposition. I have people coming to pick up puppies later, so I gotta be nice to them.
Starting point is 00:31:47 So I just need to get this out right now. I need to tell you, Taylor, this is just the beginning. Two times now I killed Taylor, and then in September I'm coming to California to whip your ass again, and then in October I'm coming to South Carolina to do it again. I'm never, I'm never gonna stop. the I'm calling in every week now until the conclusion of the show. Well, check this out, dude. I'm going to be in Italy. Listen, listen, I'm going to be in Italy for 10 days. Here comes the excuses. No, this is not the excuse. This is for when I beat your ass, you're going to have to feel really bad.
Starting point is 00:32:34 Cause I'm not even going to train for 10 days going into California. I'm going to be on a pig farm for 27 fucking years before I get there. I didn't know Taylor's going Danny Spiegel on us. Wow. Is that what Danny Spiegel does? You're doing an event in Dubai for a million bucks. I actually had a new shirt on Vindicate and it says boys who eat. I wonder what are the boys who starve? Colton, Colton, when you said when people come to pick up the puppies,
Starting point is 00:33:03 do you feel bad giving them away? Like does the party want to keep them all? Like does that, is it hard? Yeah. I mean, I've got five puppies right now. These are, they're really cute. The other like this batch, it's kind of very sweet. So like having around results. So it's a pain in the ass to have to take care of them. The money probably makes it easier too. Yeah. This will be a, this will be our break even litter So we'll break it in from on the initial capital investment from starting the dog business
Starting point is 00:33:31 So I'll have another litter and like a week and now probably last one for a while. That's a retirement litter. What did you? Honestly, what did you think about the workout in terms of a stimulus you like it? Yeah for me, it was a lot of grip fatigue. I got these fat fucking sausage fingers Yeah, but you have long you have bigger hands than people imagine you have long hands, too Yeah Picking girth be so it makes hard to I don't have those long skinny banana fingers like some of these bitches I Got these meaty ass man hands from Slapping pigs around is that from slapping pigs around or slapping other things around?
Starting point is 00:34:10 Slap him. Derek Brigham, let's get a Rage Against the Machine bird chest shirt. Oh, geez. Okay. Any, what about the bench press? When you saw Taylor break it up, did you start laughing? Yeah, I'm the best venture in this sport. I'm the best squatter, best at burpees, best at chest to our pull ups.
Starting point is 00:34:33 So let me know. Stop. There's a lot of things that nobody can beat. Best at thrusters. That's right, dude. Chill. Throwing potatoes at Peter's head. That's a party. We call that a party. That's a party. We call that a party. Yeah, I mean, aren't it not India? You fucking moron. What's your primary training method for training your grip?
Starting point is 00:34:52 Grabbing dicks. You masturbate, doing like farmers carries and then going right into like some barbocycling or. Do you not just call them carries instead of calling them farmer carries because you are a farmer. Do you know what I'm saying? Call them carries. That's how that works. Hey Colton when are you going to Texas? Next week. You show up on a Friday on Friday Saturday Saturday all right do you're cool in person I'm putting you on the spot I told you I only wrestled him and that went how it goes with everybody you saw what happened
Starting point is 00:35:34 when Jason tried to wrestle me it's complete domination so I don't know I I'm telling you, I finished all my paper coffee. I'm fucking drinking Mountain Dew. Oh my God. Come on. You really? That's amazing. This is Hills Burrow in drinking Mountain Dew. Who's taller? You or Trista Smith? I don't know. Who has a bigger Alright, sounds good. You the man dude, thank you.
Starting point is 00:36:24 That's quite the haul dude. My goodness, holy shit. Alright, great show, just two people today. Taylor, Taylor, ask me if my wiener is bigger than any female on the planet. Go ahead, do it. Is your penis bigger than Tia's? Yeah, yeah, anyone, name one. And I'll just say yeah, why didn't he say yes? the planet. Yeah. Yeah. Anyone
Starting point is 00:36:45 name one and I'll just say yeah why didn't he say yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's that's the thing dude. He has the weiner dude. What about Pinero? Yes. No, it's not. No lie dude. No lie. When does a clitoris become a penis? Eight weeks of anemone or so.
Starting point is 00:37:13 Let's have a little business meeting now. So what's the plan for next week? So no one gets the money. This fucking guy, we need to be worried about take programming away from Taylor. So for purpose of swimming or plans for time. 30 rope climbs for time 30 legless. I'll do 30 rope climbs for time. 30 rope climbs for time. 30 legless. I'll do 30 rope climbs for time some week. You could also do 15 and 15. How long do you think 30 legless takes you?
Starting point is 00:37:35 Probably, I don't know, that's probably a 10 minute or huh? Yeah, probably 30 less. Wow, maybe longer. I mean, just do 15, you're good. You get to a point where it's like, you know what I mean? You hit a wall and it gets really hard.
Starting point is 00:37:48 Andrew Hillers, your penis bigger than Michelle Obama's. I think I believe so. All right. Is it bigger than Michael Obama? Is it Barack? Transmit Michael. I'm not caught up on politics.
Starting point is 00:38:01 If that's Barack these days, then no. He's had a huge dog. Oh, yeah. True. Jake. I did see that when I asked Colton, if he was voting for Kamala, he did. He nodded his head. Please unfollow Colton Mertens. All right, guys. Everyone. Thanks for joining in. Better Version Nutrition, thank you Caleb. Pedro White, Tyler Watkins, Andrew Hiller, Taylor Self, thank you very much. We will see you guys, do we have a show tomorrow morning? What on earth?
Starting point is 00:38:36 You've BKG tomorrow, don't you? I think that we had a slight, I think we had a change with him. I don't know if that's the change time. I don't see him on the calendar. I don't see him on the calendar I don't see anyone on the calendar tomorrow morning, but we will have be here at 7 a.m I Taylor you should be ashamed of yourself. I am for before not even I need to do this work I just in general just From birth Wow Jeff Jeff Vaco
Starting point is 00:39:00 Racism and misogyny are strong between my ears because that's how I view the world is everything is racist and misogynistic. I understand Jeff. You're a woman hater. I get it. I get it. So he's Jeff's just checking in. He's like guys, I still got it. He's right. Yeah. Didn't rich do 30 legless rope climbs in like seven minutes.
Starting point is 00:39:26 Some way that it was not Daniel. It was not even close to that fast. Daniel, Gary, this show is faster than Taylor's premature ejaculation. You guys never remember the first time that happened? No, I remember the last time it happened. I do. I do. I remember the first time that the only thing. No, no,
Starting point is 00:39:53 no. It's only it's only premature if you didn't want it to happen. There you go. That bitch. Yeah. I think it was still in my pants and all that. So, come on. Oh, that's great. That's the safest kind. Levan was still in that dude when it happened or was like about Soon as his chin hairs hit my balls. I was, I came
Starting point is 00:40:20 as his beard hit my balls. I ejaculated I can't help it. There's one route and it's to get to this moment. Thank you Better Version Nutrition for sponsoring this show. All right, love everyone. See you guys tomorrow morning. Don't forget to watch the UFC tonight. It's going to be a great pay-per-view out of the UK. Make sure you head over to Andrew Hiller's channel. There's a fantastic video on Ricky Garrard and Al Ghazan.
Starting point is 00:40:46 Everyone's raving about it. And if you're in Florida, scream Caleb's name. He has been sequestered inside of a motor home. I'll ejaculate on you. Bye bye. What?

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