The Sevan Podcast - Live Call In Show | There's Something Happening #953
Episode Date: June 26, 2023Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
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That's BetterHelp.com. meeting with friends before the show we can book your reservation and when you get to the main
event skip to the good bit using the card member entrance let's go seize the night that's the
powerful backing of american express visit amex.ca slash y amex benefits vary by card other conditions
apply yeah perfect bam we're live uh did you know travis bellinghausen made this um backdrop the
one that says ceo the sevan podcast with the oh i did yeah it's cool right that's dope i um travis
um if you're listening i would love it see how we're running that banner on the bottom and there's the phone number?
Somehow we need to move, like, everything up a little bit.
Hi, Kat.
Good morning.
So that you can see our sponsors, Paper Street Coffee, our sponsors and friends and partners.
Paper Street Coffee, California Peptides, and BirthFit.
Rambler, good morning.
How much creatine you got left?
So much.
I have so much creatine.
Creatine.
Keymaster,
go get him, Sebi.
Reporting for duty.
Mr. Rogers.
Jessica Valenzuela, good morning.
Officer Valenzuela.
Greg C
Have a great day all
This is the beginning of the show
Can you start the show with that
Saying have a great day
Mr. Sousa
He started early
Audrey Caleb will you love the kitty for me
Sure
Later
Dan
Sevo Constructive criticism Dan sure later later uh dan sevo
constructive criticism dan uh sergeant constructive criticism guerrero i have all of you like
pigeonholed in my head jake chapman isle of man just a dude living the good life
omar canejo it's your typical Mexican. Everyone. Extra sloppy.
You always have like ravioli stuck on your shirt.
Can't you just put the sponsors on top?
I don't know.
But now look at it.
Now look at it.
It's the three of us.
Bam.
Like that.
You guys have a preference?
No.
As long as we can see them.
Susie, your connection's a little off for what it's worth i don't care but i'm just saying what do you mean you were like getting a little pixelated was he getting pixelated for you caleb
not that i've noticed well maybe you probably weren't studying him as hard as i i miss
allison nyc good morning uh yes bigger is better morning. Yes, bigger is better.
Speaking of Allison.
Bigger is better.
Speaking of Allison.
And it's Caleb and Matt.
It is.
If so, I'll put my toe spacers on while I say this.
I've been getting a lot of questions and I don don't just mean – I don't use that lightly.
A shitload of questions and DMs about peptides, and I have not taken the peptides yet.
I have them, and I got my needles, and I'm supposed to sit down, and Hiller is going to help me inject them into my arm.
But I did schedule because I have so many questions, and if you go to the website, CA Peptides, it looks like you just order
this stuff. You just do the research on what you want and you just order it. It's like vitamins.
But I have a peptide expert and Hiller scheduled. I saw Sousa scheduled them yesterday. I saw
text thread going back and forth. And so we'll have someone on. Oh, that's the one I have, BPC157.
So many people are interested in this.
Yeah, is it good?
I haven't seen it yet.
I need to watch it tonight.
You haven't seen it either?
Oh, the video is good, yes.
Oh, it is good?
Okay.
So you inject people with stuff.
Does Hiller inject himself on the um
in that video i don't remember if i saw him inject himself but
i think the way that he was describing it is
the way that he was describing it is about how i would do it as well if i were to inject somebody with some sort of drug.
My sister, many, many years ago, had to take blood thinner.
And she had to inject it into her stomach.
And we were on a road trip together.
This is like 20 years ago.
And so I would inject it into her stomach for her.
I'd basically pinch and inject.
Pinch like a – it's kind of weird sticking a needle in skin.
It's not how you would expect.
Are you doing that tomorrow?
Is he coming on the show tomorrow?
It's scheduled for tomorrow.
Oh, what time?
In the morning?
In the morning.
Oh, shit.
I don't know.
You mean like live on the show?
Yeah.
If it wasn't tomorrow, I'd be like, fuck yeah, I'd have gotten all brave.
But it seems a little close to be like swinging my dick around and acting all brave.
I want to.
I want to.
Okay.
I mean, I'm putting on toe spacers now.
I might as well inject peptides tomorrow. Just all in yeah just lean into it but um uh i've only received one negative um uh one of my
friends was drunk most beautiful woman in the world you guys have heard me talk about her before
she was fucking hammered and she sent me a dm saying quit being a pussy and just do steroids
that was it that's all it took
have i ever shown you guys the most beautiful woman in the world i've ever showed you her
instagram account but if it's a person who i think you're talking about then yes yeah okay yeah
i see it every day You go visit it
Just to check
Give it a couple likes
Drop some support
Rest in peace Putin
Why what happened to Putin
Oh you've not been following it
No
Oh dude
It's getting pretty serious
So the Wagner Group I can't remember his name Oh, dude. It's getting pretty serious.
So the Wagner Group guy, what is his name?
I can't remember his name.
Putin, the richest man in the world?
Something's wrong with him?
That guy, Putin?
Yes, that guy.
Was he in the sub that went down?
No.
Oh.
Bring it up.
Bring it up.
Let me see. Bring it up. Bring it up. Let me see.
Bring it up.
Check this out.
I made a little undertale.
For the viewers out there.
It's Evgeny Perkozin is his name. So he's the i guess the ceo of this mercenary group that russia uses to help
fight his wars and according to him the russian military dropped a whole bunch of bombs on one
of his troops positions in like while they were fighting Ukraine
and killed like I think he's
alleging like 120
plus people or like injuring
120 plus people killing like 40 people
of the Wagner group
mercenaries so
as this is happening he
basically says he's going to go on a war
path to Moscow
to hold them accountable for what they did.
Wait a second, wait a second.
So you're telling me some Russian mercenaries
who were over there kicking ass in Ukraine got bombed by Putin.
So Putin was like, hey, assholes.
Supposedly.
Even though they're on the same team, Putin bombed their shit?
Correct.
Because he didn't want them acting like mercenaries?
Why did he bomb them?
I'm not 100% sure as to why, but according to Yevgeny,
he's saying that they've been entrenched in that position for a significant amount of time.
According to Yevgeny, you speak to yevgeny
no i'm just like listening to what his speech when during his speech oh not yevgeny who is
on this show not that yevgeny oh no not that yevgeny hey shut it david shut the fuck up
don't stop fucking telling me I'm interrupting.
Fucking assholes.
Hi, good morning, Mike.
Hi.
Sorry to interrupt you.
Go ahead.
Okay, can I read this?
Sorry, I'm interrupting again. Sorry.
Russian President Vladimir Putin, citing a threat to his nation, said he had ordered the military to squash a rebellion um but okay can i read this sorry i'm interrupting again sorry a russian president vladimir putin
citing a threat to his nation said he had ordered the military to squash a rebellion
led by wagner mercenary boss evgeny prigozhin prigozhin claimed early saturday to have taken
control of the russian military command base in rostov on dawn in the south meanwhile the governor
of the veroza region further north said a counterterrorist
operation by the military there was underway oh this is just confusing as shit the uk's defense
minister said that wagner units were moving north through vorenze region almost certainly aiming to
get to moscow okay those are all russ though? This is internal fighting?
They're all Russians.
Okay.
Internal fighting.
So what's essentially happening is, well, what Putin said in his speech is that there's a mutiny now.
There's a coup happening being led by the wagon group and their troops,
and they're going to start storming Moscow to try to, like, take it over, I guess.
And Prigozhin has said that he is is going to there's going to be a new
president of russia all i think is this is horrible what my thoughts are do you want to know don't
tell anyone i'm always concerned that like china is going to fly over or russia trying to like
russian planes are going to fly over our country and drop like 500
million chinese people on us like not bombs but literally like just start loading planes with
with chinese in them and just pouring them out on our country
just like yeah like and there's nothing we can do there's just not like it's just every hour they
drop in another 50 000 chinese people they're not
even armed like just leaving the board and and then before you know it there's uh 300 million
americans here and 500 million chinese like they just in one massive swoop just pour 500
half a billion chinese on us right and they take over we can't do anything
there'll be just trainees in the street. Don't hurt the Chinese.
Don't hurt the Chinese.
And the next thing you know, this whole country would be China.
I mean, it's an incredible mission, right?
I mean, that's the plan, right?
And wouldn't that, there would be nothing we could do.
The largest fleet of nonstop airplanes flying over American space,
pouring Chinese on all the major cities just with parachutes.
They're just pouring in.
That might work in Canada.
That one would probably die.
Each one has a backpack full of food.
No, we wouldn't do shit because we're so worried about – because we're worried about trannies.
We got tranny issues.
Watch them drop down in, like, Kansas or Tennessee.
And so when I hear this going on in Russia, I'm like, thank God.
They have their own problems.
Like, you know what I mean? I always kind of have this feeling.
That's what I would do if I were China and I wanted to take us over.
Dude.
It's a shoe win.
It's guaranteed.
Look, he even knows.
Look at Matt Burns said he'd get Jorge Ventura on.
Yeah, he understands that's the uh okay cool so i'm kind of glad that they have their own issues over there i thought china and russia was like just like minutes away from like taking over the
u.s that's good i mean they would just come through the southern border yeah you'd pour
some in through the southern border the northern border but'd force them in through the southern border, the northern border.
But I'm telling you, it is a guaranteed victory for China.
You think I'm joking, but you just have just nonstop planes flying over with Chinese people jumping out with parachutes.
I think our defenses are a little better now than they were.
We wouldn't do shit.
Caleb, what would we do? We wouldn't do shit caleb what would we do we wouldn't do shit
tell me what we would do tell me what that would look like surprise tell me what that would be you
think that we wouldn't let just millions of chinese just jump out of airplanes onto fucking
san francisco are you kidding me dude the town would be surrounded by trainees holding hands
being like don't kill the chinese let them take over we would not do shit dude you think i'm joking i am not
target practice we have fucking people molesting kids in our fucking schools and they're in their
great target practice no one's doing shit i'm already i must be an asshole i'm fighting with
caleb caller hi just to call it yeah caller oh hold on hold on caller of course of course of course
of course my brand new super advanced system doesn't work with this shit caller hold on
settle down caller settle down let me select audio device you'd be the first one to go so
yeah everyone's confused jake you're gonna be really confused when fucking 100,000 Chinese
jump on each major city in the United States out of airplanes.
Call or hide.
Rook out.
First off, the Chinese would use probably like drone swarms
and hypersonic missiles,
but I don't think they would be jumping out of planes.
I think they would just be bombing our ships
and swarming our soldiers with drone swarms.
Well, then we could at least fight back.
But you know we would never fight back if they just started pouring Chinese in.
Yeah, I don't know.
I don't know.
Hypersonic missiles, you can't really fight back against those.
I can.
But the whole thing going on in Russia, guys.
Yeah, tell me.
That's why I called.
The whole thing going on in Russia.
Can you speak in a Russian accent?
So I think you actually know what you're talking about
Then I would be like oh this guy's there
No I just get all my information
From telegram so take it or
You know take it or leave it kind of thing
But um
This Pergosian thing like he's
Stop pronouncing his name like he's Armenian
Stop saying it like it ends in I
Again please Pergosian I don't appreciate that go on Stop pronouncing his name like he's Armenian. Stop saying it like it ends in I-A-N, please.
Pergosian.
I don't appreciate that.
Go on.
Yevgeny Pergosian.
There you go.
But he's been complaining about ammo and stuff at the front
since they were taking over Bakhmut.
So, yeah, at first I didn't think it was real.
I thought it was like a crazy psy-op, you know,
like they were trying to pull the sheet over everybody's eyes
as they do a large attack on Ukraine.
But it looks like it's legit.
I woke up this morning and they're, yeah, they're like, it's full on.
They've taken over the Rostov building and pretty real, pretty crazy stuff.
Hey, so that's something I didn't get. So you're
telling me that this guy was a military commander
that worked
for Putin and Putin got pissed
or this guy got pissed, Progozhev?
Not Progozhin. Progozhev.
He's like a contractor.
He never worked
for Progozhin. He's a PM.
No, and he never was a military man.
He actually was Putin's chef.
No shit.
Believe it or not.
No, I'm having trouble believing that.
No, look it up, man.
He was actually Putin's chef and longtime friend.
So that's why this is very, very odd.
And I don't think,
and back to Caleb saying, I don't think
he's trying to pull a coup
over Putin. It's more over
Sergei Shoigu and this
Garisimov guy.
It's their
head of the army,
Sergei Shoigu.
So you're telling me, let me get this straight.
Putin sent a bunch of dudes over to Ukraine.
He goes, go slap those bitches around.
While they're slapping those bitches around,
someone from the home base bombed some of them.
So they're looking back at the mothership being like, all right.
And so they're coming back to slap the mothership around.
Yeah. And then what they're seeing it was it was friendly
fire but what's really weird is the video that they've they've shown from the front lines from
the damage from where that where that where they were apparently hit there's no evidence of any
bodies there's no bomb area there's so that that's what to me made me think it was kind of a psyop of
something i mean with all this talk and you got Lindsey Graham and Blumenthal coming out talking about the chance of nuclear event in Ukraine.
Like, I thought it was all just part of this psyop that maybe Russia was trying to get on board with.
It's very confusing right now, man.
Like, I follow this war really closely.
And the fog of war is so thick that
you really we none of us know what's going on can you define what the fog of war is for those of us
who weren't around in during vietnam uh it's just when it's just when basically both side both
parties are are putting news out there propaganda that that kind of really makes it difficult to
find out how many casualties have been happening
or troop movements or anything like that.
They just try to keep things in the fog.
There's also just so much going on in such a short period of time.
This is exciting.
Hey, you do understand my plot by the Chinese, right?
Can I share that?
Look at this picture I just put up. you do understand my plot by the Chinese, right? You just, um, you can, you can, I share that. You look at,
look at this picture I just put up.
You just have,
you just cover it.
Can't you just see the sky covered with Chinese falling with like,
uh,
chopsticks in a bowl and a parachute on their back.
Seriously.
500 million of them.
You see that,
right?
Just pouring in and there's nothing we could do.
We would be like,
all right,
fucking time to learn Mandarin.
We would bend over and take...
Unless a giant butterfly net
came and scooped all those people up
before they hit the ground.
Once they hit the ground, we're toast.
Yeah, they'll probably
send them over here on those balloons.
Listen, listen. You guys think I'm joking.
That's what's funny.
Hey, Sevan, your China scenario is actually happening in Serbia, Kosovo, full of Albanians.
Easy to be a majority if you keep making families, 10 to 12 kids, and that way they invade and take over.
Yeah.
Fair.
Keep abortion legal.
Keep baby killing legal.
Oh, no.
Come on.
I don't know.
Okay, before I get going, I'm going to get off this call.
Okay, bye.
All right, dude.
What a hot morning.
Thank you for calling.
Hey, that's already 1,000% more calls than we had on the live calling show last night
that was supposed to be like a sports calling show.
There was one call.
What happened? They got hung up on?
I don't even remember.
I'm pretty excited
we got that show off the ground, though.
I'm really excited.
The show was great.
It had a really good
sitting around, talking shit,
getting super informed on everything.
It was loose, it was fun, it was energetic.
You should go,
go watch that.
Okay.
So back to the peptides real quick before we go.
Yeah.
Spin off.
So,
so I guess that guy's coming on tomorrow.
If you want to know about peptides,
come on tomorrow.
Him and Hillary.
Yeah.
This dude's jacked out of his mind.
I have one question about peptides,
probably for Caleb to answer.
Do you have to take them for forever?
Like are they the same as the testosterone?
Like when, once you're in, you like,
you got to do it for the rest of the time or is it a one-time deal?
I think it's more of a one-time deal.
You're not like replacing a hormone.
So the way, and then when I was doing some research on it,
when this started coming up, I just realized, or I noticed that you can just take it for like a month at a time.
So like when you have these – like this BBC 157, like if you just have like a nagging injury like Sevan's elbow, you can just take it for the month that you have.
My fucking bicep. My fucking bicep. Do not give misinformation. My elbow is fine. Look it.
Right, right, right, right, right. Yeah.
It's his bicep. It for his bicep you can take it for the two months or one month or however long it lasts and then once your
symptoms are alleviated then you you can just stop taking it it's kind of i would say it's
similar to like like a Tylenol or an ibuprofen. But it's better because it's actually supposed to heal it.
I did 50 snatches in each arm with a 35-pound dumbbell the other day.
Your bicep survived?
Yeah, it's good.
Excuse me.
All right, so that's tomorrow.
I want to also bring up one more thing.
For those of you who saw the Tyson Bajan interview,
that's what it looks like when you're free.
So if you want to know what you're seeing and sensing off of that kid i remember uh 20 years ago travis said the truth will always set you free that's a kid who can
speak freely because he's not guarding anything in his brain that is that's what freedom looks like
mental freedom that's a that's a really honest genuine human being that's what
that's what a yeah that that that go go back and look at that if you have kids and you want to like
be like hey you want to be cool like this kid this there's no special sauce there he's just a
po kid from west virginia who works really hard but he's just free he just has parents who let
him be in an environment to be free he He's not guarding anything. He's not worried about saying the wrong pronoun or oriental,
or he's not hiding the fact that he does drugs. He's just, he's just free.
And you sense that in him, the way he thinks, the way he's giving in the conversation, that's,
that's freedom. That's mental freedom. That's just good boy shit. That's, hey, I haven't done
anything in my life that I wouldn't want put on the cover of the new york times it's not hiding it's it's really
cool dan guerrero uh he's sharp and focused it's awesome uh jake chapman he presents yeah
uh rambler glad the topic changed some chinese Chinese Americans will get beat up from that talk no, no, you're not, no, no, no
exact opposite
internment camp
enrollment, I'm just, I got a
ticker up here, enrollment in Chinese language courses
just skyrocketed from that little
of 20% nationwide
from that little piece I just did
get your Duolingo apps going
Ken Walters I just finished your Get your duolingo apps going.
Ken Walters, I just finished your 10 rounds of 150 single unders and 10 pushups.
My calves are in knots.
Great workout though and loved it.
I did eight of those rounds unbroken, by the way.
I think it was like the first and the ninth round I took a break.
The first round was so hard, even though I was warmed up.
But, hey, I wasn't sore from that.
I ran stairs, three flights of stairs, steep stairs, ten times the other day.
And my calves were sore for like three days.
So I don't know why.
I talked to Greg about it.
I said, hey, Greg, why do you think I'm more sore running upstairs than doing barefoot single unders? Do you have any thoughts on that? Susan,
before I tell you what Greg said, what are your thoughts on that?
I think you're just, you're just producing more power.
Like you're just doing more and you're moving through more range of motion as
you climb the stairs.
Oh, that's exactly what Greg said. Greg said, Hey dude, you're taking,
you're taking more weight. Yeah. He said, you're taking, uh, uh,
the same amount of weight way higher basically.
Each step is like 6 to 10 inches.
And you're coming – range of motion.
He said you're coming off your – I forget what he said.
You're playing of motion or something.
He worded a little differently, but because you're basically – you're leaning forward.
You're going this way instead of just like –
Going up and down.
Yeah.
That's what he said.
He said, yeah, you got a greater – I forget how he worded it basically what you said yeah crazy dude stair running is crazy yeah i mean
have you ever gone to just walk up a set of stairs before and you just are out of breath and you're
like fuck yeah i'm in more shape than this yeah i'm so out of breath and then i look around because
i know the other people don't work out as much as me and i'm like are you fuckers out of breath too
or is it just me?
Or you ever notice like if you have to just jump like your dog's getting sprayed by a skunk in the middle of the night and you're sleeping, you jump out of bed to run outside and you've only run like 50 feet.
If that and your fucking heart rates, it feels like it's at 170.
You're like, what?
Yeah.
Yeah.
A little scared as you jump up to Riley S seven, 7-inch to 11-inch landing is typical for stairs. These stairs were so steep, but they were small steps.
Coming down was scary.
Was it in like a fire escape or something, or was it outside?
Outside.
Hey, are you coming to my house today?
Yeah, I was going to ask you.
Is that going down?
I'm down.
I guess.
That would be awesome.
The fights are at noon.
Oh, they're at noon.
Okay.
I coach, and I'll be done at 11, then I close the gym.
So it'll take about 30, 40 minutes to close it, and I could roll out.
You coach from 11 to noon?
No, no, no.
I coach from 10 to 11, and then I'll close at 11 to 11.30.
I waited that long.
Ladies and gentlemen, the class at CrossFit Livermore will be starting actually today a half hour early and ending a half hour early.
Please arrive at 9.30, so as soon as I can leave.
We're going to get him out in time.
Your class is done.
Leave right now immediately.
right now immediately caleb the just to go back to putin he he commands a bunch of generals and one of the generals was out in the field
and he got hit with some friendly fire and he's pissed so he's coming back to kick putin's ass
in the simplest of terms yes that's like shit my boys do that's like that's
like if you have three boys that's the kind of shit they do like one of my boys is playing and
then they're all playing and one dude hits another it's like three stooges shit
yeah that's basically what's happening. Don't we bomb it?
Isn't that just normal protocol?
Like 10,000 dudes out in the theater and some dudes are going to get killed by friendly fire?
Like that NFL football player, Tillman, wasn't he killed by friendly fire?
It just happens, right?
It's part of the game.
I mean, it seems good.
I imagine this seemed more direct, less of a mistake than it was on purpose.
I think that's the way it's perceived.
So that's why he's – but also it's been like growing tension between that general
and then the generals who are coordinating all the other militaries
my boys were um uh my boys were um
my boys were at the at the park yesterday at a birthday party
and uh they came home and they're like dude there was an asshole kid there and i'm like really and
it's the three of them right and they're like there was an asshole kid there i'm like really
and they're like yeah i'm like what do you do and he's like we were playing tag and he kept
like tagging people in their head and then and and then they're like and then my son joseph goes
yeah he tagged ari in the head and i wanted to go over and punch that kid in the face i'm like oh
you did he goes yeah he goes like this and he punches ari in the head, and I wanted to go over and punch that kid in the face. I'm like, oh, you did?
He goes, yeah.
He goes like this, and he punches Ari in the face.
And they start fighting.
They start fucking fighting.
I'm like, wait a second.
You just showed me how you wanted to protect your fucking brother from another kid, and this is what you wanted to do to him, and you punched your brother in the face.
He goes, yeah.
I'm like, dude, are you guys tard tarted i don't even know if they get it
but that's what i see when i hear the putin thing that's what i think
there's people who really um
move the needle for me uh in terms of like my
arrogance and confidence and whenever I see
Jedediah comment
I think yeah I'm cool
you know what I mean
like yeah this show's
cool Jedediah Snelson
if you think stairs are bad you should try to
push on a slanted sidewalk for a while
alright
fair humble just issue everyone everyone should be issued a
wheelchair just at birth here's a wheelchair just in case or if you just want to get some empathy
all right uh i want to uh today at one o'clock i don't think i'll be watching this because i'm
going to be immersed in the ufc but i want to show you something. There's a link I sent to Caleb today. It's called the Dubai match. I actually haven't watched this clip.
told me about it i haven't watched this but this is devin lorette um definitely one of the most charismatic uh arm wrestlers of all time definitely one of the best for sure top five best arm
wrestlers who've ever lived probably top three um and uh he was also a jtf2 guy uh and um
it's weird the connection he has with me through arm wrestling but also um there's stories of greg
going over to canada with nicole and dave and uh teaching jtf2 and devin was in the group at the
time and devin was like they're like hey can you do a muscle-up and devin just devin's a huge dude
probably six five two fifty and he just did a muscle-up. Anyway, here we go.
Devin Lorette wearing a green tuxedo.
He's getting ready for a big arm wrestling match that will happen at 1 p.m. today, Pacific Standard Time, in Dubai.
The walking green screen yeah that's that graphic oh no audio oh we can't because of the music? Yeah. Oh, that sucks.
Oh, that sucks.
The green screen part's funny right there.
I wonder if you can hear him talking.
No.
No, that just looks like brothers playing, honestly.
Those of you listening, this is Devin Lorette in a green suit walking around during a press conference, high-fiving, rousing,
getting into a car, walking on set, sitting and talking into a microphone.
Taunting and
tussling, if you will.
Taunting and tussling?
Taunt and tussle.
I know, but that's
not true.
I looked at the thing and it said the Wagner
group was the equivalent of
our Blackwater group
yes exactly
basically he gets into a shoving
match with this guy Dave Chafee
wait why doesn't it show it on this
it does I don't know it's at
the end I don't know what the fuck happened
no I haven't tried California
peptides yet I have the juice
I have everything I need I have the needles
I have everything I have the juice there I have everything I need. I have the needles. I have everything. I have the juice.
There it is. Okay, here it is.
Here's the guy, Dave Chafee. He's going to arm wrestle
today at 1 o'clock. You can go to
Core Sports.
Type into Google Core Sports
Devin versus Dave
and it will give you a link. Look at the way Dave's
looking at his body, sizing up his body.
Anyway, 1 p.m. today, if you want to see the great Devin Lorette arm wrestle live.
It's best of three.
Seve, has Dave spoken to you about the behind the scenes?
We have spoken.
I can't tell you what was said. I am very, very, very anxious to do the behind the scenes this year.
I've expressed that to Matt Souza.
I'll tell you this.
I don't think it's going to happen, but I would do it in a second,
and I would do it for free.
And I want to re-reiterize.
Is that a word?
Reiterate?
Reiterate.
I want to reiterize and reiterate that under my reign there was a espn show
behind the scenes a road to the games and a documentary on netflix
and that they were all it's a crazy one two three four combo punch right netflix international
exposure super polished 4k espn biggest sports network in the world
behind the scenes something that no sport at the intimacy that no sport uh gets um with their
athletes and they never will get and uh with the most minutes watched in the history of youtube
and then road to the games which was produced by uh heber mars mariah and, and Ian. And that was a crazy polished hype,
basically CrossFit's version of Embedded.
Now they got none of that.
I mean, they're going to have a documentary coming out.
By the way, I started watching the documentary yesterday.
Oh, you got a sneak peek?
Mariah Moore, yeah.
She's going to come on Friday.
Fuck, it looks fucking amazing.
Is it good?
I only got to watch five minutes, and then my kids came home,
and I started bathing my kids, but I can't wait to sit up
and watch that shit on my 90-incher.
I'm excited.
So I doubt very highly I would do it, but I would do it in a fucking second.
They just got to give me a fucking hotel room and access,
and I would tear that shit up.
And they can even have final edit.
I don't give a shit.
It wouldn't be appropriate to give out an email for everybody to email in, would it?
Just go on there.
If you guys just go on their social media
and you could bomb them.
I mean, do whatever you want.
Jedediah Snelson,
why is it if your music gets flagged on Instagram,
it always gets blocked in Russia?
I need to start paying attention to the lyrics
and see if it's the message they're blocking.
That would mean we don't get you on here, though, wouldn't it?
Yeah, it does mean that.
There is...
We have ideas, though.
Yeah.
Part of me just obviously just wants to stay here at home.
Yeah, catchrin first interview.
For sure.
Hey, when I interact with Katrin,
it's going to be so mellow if I ever interact with her.
I'm not going to open with,
yo, bitch, why'd you post that shit?
I'm going to be like, hey, what's up, girl?
She's going to be like, hey.
Okay, how are you?
I'm going to be like, I'm good.
Thanks for talking to me.
I know things have been tense.
I'm not like, it's not like, I'm going to be cool.
I'm going to be cool.
I don't have a heart a heart filled with hate
i don't i do not i don't and if i do i don't want to
oh i didn't erase this i'm erasing number, Caleb. Look at the size of these bouncers.
Yeah, I'd like to.
I would like.
Here's the thing.
I would like to have Katrin on this show.
And I'd like to just talk to her for 15 minutes. I'd like to congratulate her on her success this year and her comeback.
Talk to her a little bit about her training,
keep it pretty superficial.
And I just want to test the waters.
I want to see what happens.
I would like that.
She would take off running.
I think Katrin Horvath and fikowski will take off running record mile
pace the minute they see you no it's good no i think i think it would be the opposite of that
i think i think but i think the large large majority would embrace you right when you came
in and then leaving the rest of them because the the other ones don't really think for themselves
that much to also have to embrace you because they're more worried about
looking like they're part of the in crowd
than they are about holding their own opinions.
Oh.
So if 80% of people are like, oh my gosh,
someone's here to do behind the scenes and they rush it,
like majority of people I think
would be
cool about it because they don't want to be the odd man out.
And I think,
I mean, it's only me, but I think I i leave people alone who you read the room really well yeah who i didn't talk to
fraser a lot and i didn't talk to tia a lot because they were very i didn't get um open arms
feel from them and i don't want to bug people excuse me
yeah if you have a if you posted a square, you should go back and erase it.
If she was with Ben, she would come on.
Well, that's for sure.
Isn't that interesting?
Boy, the Ben interview got a lot of attention.
Ben did a good job on that.
People come here for the most trusted source in the space.
Most trusted news source in all of CrossFit.
Most intimate.
Most intimate.
Most authentic.
Look, that even got Caleb to nod.
Caleb agrees.
Topless interviews.
Even Hiller feels comfortable with his shirt off here.
Yeah.
Open space.
Oh, shit.
Listen, Kenneth DeLapp fucking trying to slap Sousa.
Why are you going to bring that back up again?
I had the thought.
I wasn't going to say it.
Listen, listen.
Listen, it was his – listen, first of all, it was Sousa's debut.
Yeah, Kenneth.
And listen, Conor McGregor broke his leg and fucking Joe Rogan went down and fucking
put the mic in his face
his fucking ankle
was like this
do you remember that
it sits down next to him
that's what I was doing to Sarah
I was gonna crawl up
it's Matt Rogan Souza
that's how he got the nickname Rogan
yeah and I think that it's Matt Rogan Souza. That's how he got the nickname, Rogan. Yeah.
And I think that
Hayley Adams was just so confident
in that moment.
Every moment, Kenneth. That didn't even slow me down.
You see, I didn't even skip a fucking beat.
I got another person to run away from me later
in the weekend.
Who was that?
Hayley Adams.
Oh.
Hey, it's delicate
she's got a super weird
face on her
oh shit he was there
when Biden fell too I forgot about that
yeah see Bernie's got my back thank you bernie
someone should have written something on the bottom of biden's shoe right there
like right foot left foot you know or like an r and an f just says andy toy story on the bottom
okay um number what's number four have you ever been trapped under the bar oh okay
oh did jake jake how did you say that after i posted it or did you say the same thing
wait is this why is this i don't know this must be in the wrong notes go ahead and play this
this just must be in the wrong notes this must ahead and play this. This just must be in the wrong notes.
This must have been something that I meant to put for her show,
but I made it on this.
You can erase this.
You're so spotty this morning, Caleb.
Why is your shit skippy skippy?
The video or myself?
Everything.
I don't know.
Did you pay your internet?
I did.
Okay, let's play number 10.
It's a repeat.
I've played it before, but let's play number 10.
We'll just test the audio out with this.
That is not true, Ken.
Hiller and I were together when the athletes showed up,
so you can't really,
what do you say?
Wait,
what do you say?
Now that you said that, we got to know what he said.
What do you say?
Ken,
Ken Walters over here says,
uh,
uh,
Susie gets them to run away and Hiller has them come to him.
Oh,
no,
I,
I know that's misinformation.
That is misinformation.
I think they're,
they want to beat Hiller up.
I was nervous for Hiller at the games when the giant dude came up to him.
I'd like to see Hiller now that he's all juiced up,
stand next to that guy again.
Not a chance.
I was nervous just because I didn't want that dude to act a fool,
and then we're going to have to slap him around a little bit.
That guy was huge.
You guys weren't slapping no one around.
That old guy?
Dude, come on.
All right. It's a dream fight, dude. It's not like we're squared up on the edge of a cage. You guys weren't slapping no one around. That old guy? Dude, come on.
It's not like we're squared up on the edge of a cage.
You half step out, bam!
The thing breaks out.
You gotta be prepared.
It's different. We're not lined up squared up like that.
Coming like a Chinese paratrooper.
I have faith in you.
I have faith in you.
I'm the guy that's so tough
but there's nowhere no fighting inside hey that's that that's the first place they should drop 10,000
chinese just right on the crossfit games in madison this year just as a test run just just
see they get to see what happens you will realize there's only 3,000 people that actually attend the games. Okay.
Let's see.
Oh.
Negrosfit
games.
Oh.
Hey, that would be the first time a Chinese person
has actually been in the games
inclusive inclusive how about the fucking crossfit games page doing an elizabeth
ockenwally post about like the most blah blah blah something how about how much that website
fucking sucks that instagram account just the whole thing the most successful black athlete
in the history of
the games okay cool well how come there hasn't how come there's only been one since then
but with all this inclusive talk what's even the point of that yeah the website's like so stupid
to manage like it's like not only do you have to already know about the sport but now you have to
know how to run this website in order to follow follow along how about you bring her how about you bring her on the podcast and interview her how about you
just celebrate her because she's a good athlete why does she have to be a woman and why does she
have to be black well why can't you just celebrate her that esg score hey guys you have to understand
it will always be fucked up until you just start celebrating people all on the same with the same denominator.
So if you're going to celebrate black women, you're going to have to celebrate white men.
Since no one wants to do that, just fucking celebrate people.
It's fucking ridiculous.
You're promoting the divisiveness.
OK, speaking of divisiveness, let's see what this bald guy has to say about being a dad.
What if that was the thing?
What if it was just bald people that we were after?
Two bald men.
Everything was just whether you had hair or not, not the color of your skin.
What if instead of skin color, we just focused on how much hair you had on your head?
A half bald guy.
It literally makes the same amount of sense.
Right.
A bald man we're seeing stealing razors out of a Walmart for the 13th time this week.
Okay, action.
This guy's a Jew.
Don't push kids to do anything.
Is that what that thing on his head is?
Yeah, Yamaka.
Yamaka. Yamaha.
Pushing means you're standing behind him,
pushing him forward.
Don't push.
Pull.
Pulling means I'm going, come with me.
So you have to create
a lifestyle
that children find irresistible
a lifestyle that they
want to follow and want to
run to keep up with you
don't push
don't push kids
okay that's it don't push him the fuck number 11 i'm gonna pretend like that didn't just happen
in the show wait do you have a point to make after that no i don't i do no no number 11 first
cool thing i've seen in baseball ever.
Pretend like that didn't happen.
Everyone was just going to go through a time portal.
Pretend like that part didn't happen.
It was so powerful. The first time I saw, okay, let's go.
Let's talk about sports.
Let's stay in my domain where I'm an expert.
This is the only cool thing I've ever seen in baseball, by the way,
the only, except for the time when the guy hit the bird.
That was, that was pretty cool too. But hit the bird. That was pretty cool, too.
But check this out.
This is pretty awesome right here.
Breaks for second.
Zedino's throw.
Into the runner, and they got him.
Oh, my goodness.
That's unbelievable.
But dude breaks.
Oh, my God.
For second.
Zedino's throw.
Into the runner, and they got him.
Oh, dude, you can't see it because it's so spotty.
God.
So chalky.
Like, even Blade knows.
That was anticlimactic as fuck.
I don't know which part he's talking about.
That ball hits him right square in the balls.
Oh.
Can you see that?
Randy Johnson.
That ball struck out like 17 million players.
Safer out.
Call that a triple play.
Yeah, smash his nuts. Can you guys see
that at home? I can't see it on my screen.
It's all blurry. Oh, there it oh there it is wow wow right in the pocket
and then he catches it right after that it like pops off of his dick and into his glove
yeah that's uh that's uh yeah never take your eye off the balls
if you know what i mean never take your eye off the balls oh that guy the guy that hit the bird
was randy johnson and randy johnson went to my high school you just looked that up nope the
comments told me rb rb's got a lot of livermore facts. It's like from here or around here or something.
Greg from the United States Marine Corps.
No, George.
Sorry, George from the United States Marine Corps.
Coolest baseball video is when the guy caught the ball that almost hit the woman reporter.
No.
That's not real.
But I appreciate your contribution to the show.
Yeah, and that pitch was badass.
First cool thing I've seen in baseball.
There it is.
No one needs to watch baseball.
If there's anything cool that happens in the sport, I'll tell you.
Have your boys been to a baseball game?
No.
They want to go to a baseball game?
When I leave Santa Cruz, my boys trip, they're like, look, a building.
A window. Look. They get us, look, a building. A window.
Look.
They give us some Giants tickets.
You can? I know someone who plays on the team.
Oh.
Can you guarantee that we won't step on a needle when we go there? I guarantee you
can't. You will.
You're going to have to actively. They're going to be like your
paratroopers falling from the sky except for just needles.
Needles.
Number 21. gonna be like your paratroopers falling from the sky it's ever just needles needles um uh number 21 this one's called democrat i'm sure this one's great god don't these shirts fit so good
do you like mine don't plan these i was actually i was actually thinking if I do go to the games, I should probably start tightening up my diet now.
The games I always saw as like a beauty pageant for me.
It was like, hey, you have to show up there and kind of look like the best you can possibly look.
It's gone downhill a little since then.
More curls, less margaritas.
Man found guilty of lighting UC Berkeley student on
oh I've already shown this too
what is going on
what is going on
it's been a while
okay well let's watch this anyway
this guy lights someone on fire
a man
treatment program no prison time for a man who lit Asian UC Berkeley student on fire.
Who cares if he's Asian?
Immediately sprayed WD-40.
This dude sprayed WD-40 on someone randomly and then lit it on fire.
Can we hear the audio?
How the – like why the fuck would you do that?
Why not? Playing with fire is fun hey maybe that dude that asian guy just dropped in from an airplane
down to the ground saw him pull out the knife i pulled him down he got to the floor
what's up with the audio
okay what's going on? Why is it all fucking...
I can't hear.
I stepped on his wrist.
Is Caleb needed?
Pulled him up.
Disarmed him from the knife.
The victims say it was never...
I can't hear that.
Yeah.
Caleb, you okay?
It's kind of rough.
You can't hear that.
I could.
I could hear...
I knew it.
Oh, I knew it.
It's so much better.
Okay, so this show is fucked up.
It's Caleb's fault.
Okay, what number was that one again?
Who knows?
We've already seen that one before.
I'm not even playing.
I'm going straight to 27.
All right, 27.
I got it.
Portland to clear more tents from sidewalks to settle disability suit.
Listen to this fucking stupidity.
You guys ready for this?
This is fucking crazy.
So some fucking people in wheelchairs
or some shit, people with crutches, I don't know
what, sued the city of Portland.
This is what it takes.
Goddamn these fucking...
This is what it fucking
takes. Portland city government has reached a
tentative agreement to clear more homeless campsites
from city sidewalks, settling a lawsuit
from 10 residents who have
or care for people with physical disabilities.
Meaning the only reason why they're clearing the sidewalks, people, is because of people with disabilities.
Fuck your kids. Fuck you.
Yeah.
Who gives a shit about anyone unless they have a disability?
As part of a proposed settlement, the city agreed to prioritize removing campsites that obstruct sidewalks, extended its ban on the city employees handing out tents and tarps to homeless residents, meaning they're going to hand out fewer tarps and tents, and they're going to pull off 500 homeless encampments that are on sidewalks a year.
The city will also make it easier for people with physical disabilities
to report obstructed sidewalks.
So now if you're in a wheelchair,
they're going to make it easier for you to report that shit
so that you can get by.
Well, thank goodness.
At least they chose to do it for something, right?
Oh my, it's...
Hey dude, this is idiocracy.
We're in a world of just idiocracy.
How come I can't see more of this article?
You have to be a subscriber?
Yeah, that's why I was going to scroll it down while you were reading,
but it's like it just blocked.
Caleb, you're fucked.
And maybe you can come back.
Yeah, you fucked the whole show up today.
No, we didn't.
I know.
They're always all pixely oh you just kev you have to talk now
you're not allowed to bring stuff up i don't know how to do that you don't have the power you don't
have the internet bandwidth which is you don't have the power you you've been neutered. Susan, number five, lobsters.
Excuse me.
I'm in a wheelchair, and I'm having trouble walking by the next five blocks
because there's people camping there.
Yeah, well, I called last week because my kids need to go to high school,
and they keep stepping on needles.
Does that count for anything?
Only if they're transgender kids.
Oh, thank you.
They happen to be.
They come from a normal family with a loving household?
Yeah, fuck them.
Get in line and pay the taxes, bitch.
Play it.
Officer who was in prison.
Is mine all fucking choppy now too?
in prison food is mine all fucking choppy now too okay no i don't know let's play this i just i just got a really interesting uh screenshot it's pretty funny
is it that i'm on oh no it's on it's on um yeah it's what you're on it's someone sent
us a screenshot from red. Yeah, I saw that.
Here's a public service announcement.
If you want to make yourself just completely retarded and stupid and corrupt yourself, go to Reddit.com.
Choose any page and start reading.
I never go there.
I don't go to Facebook.
I don't go to Reddit.
You're welcome, someone. Thank you. reddit uh you're welcome someone thank you jedediah snelson thank you how many of you reported jedediah thank you you're a good dude
oh my goodness i'm telling you he he i love that dude okay let's let's go uh action like i read that lobsters used
to be peasant food 100 lobster was served to prisoners 100 why did that change i i forget
the story well the funny thing was is even a law on the books in maine that you can't feed
lobster to prisoners more than three times a week so they're essentially cockroaches they are yeah
they have the exact same neurological system as a cockroach. And they used to just wash up in mounds. And that's exactly why they were considered poor people food. Like, I'm from Brooklyn, you drive over the Bell Parkway, and you would see people fishing off the Bell Parkway. And people would go, Oh, how ghetto, how gross, how whatever, it's like, they're not paying for dinner tonight. ghetto is that right but the thing was because it was so plentiful and
because it was understood to sort of be a bug of the ocean no one cared about it once it became
less available and once other chefs started going oh this is a really delicate flavorful
they gentrified me yeah they gentrified bugs you're not wrong and that's that's kind of the
crazy thing and now it's a felony to rob someone's lobster pot.
And there's a rule.
You have to make the door of a lobster pot biodegradable.
So if a lobster goes into an abandoned pot, it's not like a death sentence.
They can still get out.
It's crazy.
Like I read that lobster.
Hey, wild, right?
Yeah.
That makes sense.
Can Jews eat lobsters?
Is that kosher?
For some reason, I think I heard that Jews aren't allowed to eat shit that eats off the bottom.
Like, I don't think they're allowed to eat pigs either.
They're not allowed to eat dirty animals.
Yeah.
Are you looking that up, Caleb?
Jews and lobsters?
Isn't that what that is?
Like kosher, right?
Kosher food.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Jewish scripture prohibits eating all shellfish.
Nevertheless, Maine's Jews have developed and pronounced fondness for one of the state's signature dishes.
Many Jewish Mainers eat lobster even though they would never eat pork and other
forbidden food unless it was plentiful where they live and have a lot of access to it in which case
they bend the rules like the main jews in maine did it reminds me of the whole thomas so well
thing that um uh about um rednecks redneck culture being really what uh black culture is in the united states they they
they got indoctrinated with redneck culture and now they defended if they're their own
or or mexicans in catholicism you were native americans you were raped by spaniards and now
you're the poster children for catholicism that was easy take some dick maria and have 10 kids
crazy no no no no prophylactics for you no birth control for you maria
and now we have a religion it's fucking crazy how that shit happens so quickly so fucking quickly
and they defend it like it's some sort of
truth.
So the lobster's just a piece of shit.
Lobsters are kind of weird.
They are kind of weird.
They're kind of chewy and weird.
I'm not a fan of lobster.
You guys like lobster? Caleb, you look great now.
What, Matt? What change?
I like crab.
I don't know.
I'm not a huge seafood person.
So well knows Jack all southern redneck culture.
I don't think he claims to know it.
Jack about.
Lobster is one of those things that just needs shit loads of butter.
The most lobster I've ever seen was like great glassman's house
yeah he had that big like dinner party thing there and there's just that huge i don't know
you call it that yeah yeah yeah have you ever had like like a lobster boil yeah that's what it was
absolutely just like boil a bunch of them and then they have like a big table and they just
dump the whole thing on the table and you just pop up and eat them They just like boil a bunch of them, and then they have like a big table, and they just dump the whole thing on the table,
and you just pop up and eat them all.
Just like with the – and you got a pair of like walnut poppers, walnut openers.
Scallops are weird too, man.
Scallops are weird too.
Like sometimes I like them, and sometimes they're kind of weird.
It's going to be a no from me, dog.
Dean with some words of wisdom coca-cola is healthy dean likes the uh inflammatory comments i noticed that last night a little bit too
when uh coca-cola bernie gannon the davos elite will have the unwashed eating bugs within a decade
um can we play...
There's one at the top there that's not numbered.
It says, Translate Talk For Real.
It's probably Tranny Talk For Real.
What is the show doing from last night?
I haven't seen it yet.
Oh, we're going to try it again, Kev?
You got this?
Oh, shit.
I think the audio is the most important thing, Caleb.
Don't fuck this up, dude.
I'll leave if it doesn't work.
You don't have to leave.
You just have to stand in the shadows.
You go in the small box.
Several weeks ago, in a vote to allow trans students to use whatever bathroom they wish
you assured us that these policies were perfectly safe as neither yourself nor law enforcement
could provide a single example of any trans student assaulting any girl in any bathroom
in any school in any state anywhere in all in fact narrative that has been set about assaults in the bathroom, it has not come as the result
of a transgender identified student. There is not a single incident that has happened.
And if you look at the nationwide data, that does not show it as well.
But not to worry since you could locate them. I took the trouble to see Loudon
County, Virginia, where last year under district policy,
a trans student was allowed into the woman's bathroom where he assaulted a girl
to cover it up. They moved him to another school where he did it again.
See Irvine, California last month,
where a trans student entered the women's locker room
and flashed the girls there.
When they confronted him, he mercilessly beat them.
This happened again in Gwinnett County, Georgia.
This happened again in Oklahoma City.
This happened again in Ohio,
where a trans man was allowed to use the locker room
where he was arrested for flashing
little girls the judge dropped the charges after he ruled that this man was so what's happening
here people is that the trans thing is a mental health issue but because the people on the left
are defending it it's turned into a witch hunt against trans people you see what's happened
because the they they've made it...
It's the exact same thing that they did to melanated people.
They're just using them as fucking pawns.
The left won't admit...
Go ahead, Susan.
No, I was going to say,
because they jam it down your throat,
and then when shit like this happens
and you push back against it,
they turn and they go,
see, you guys were all transphobic.
This is why we have to do it,
because people like you guys
are pushing back against it and creating hate.
Yeah, it's a mental illness that should be treated by one, but instead they're trying to incorporate it into society.
They're being like, yeah, it's okay for men to go into women's bathrooms.
And then the right has turned it into a witch hunt.
It's so fucked up.
And only one group suffers, the trans group.
These poor fucking people who are fucking mentally ill same thing with the george floyd thing same thing with the with the
the the left wants to make this uh um uh wants to hold someone up like that uh defund the cops
hold someone up like george floyd is a hero next thing you know cops aren't engaging people with
melanated skin who suffers it's it's fucked up it's the same playbook every time under the
guise of being kind under the guise of being kind it's like letting your your mom with dementia do
her own makeup and she's got fucking makeup all over her lipstick all over her face and you take
her out it's like the idiots it's like the idiot parents i see who let their kids come to fucking tennis class in high tops and fucking pajamas.
And the rest of the kids aren't in that shit.
So now your kid is making a mockery of the tennis class.
They look different and they're going to get fucking laughed at.
And they can't perform to their highest ability because you're open-minded.
And you're hurting your kid.
It's completely nuts. Go keep playing caleb it's complete under the this is all under the guise of trying to be nice and open passion yeah
fat for them to see anything last month this city, a man using they them pronouns in a scene straight
out of Silence of the Lambs hunted down and killed a female jogger because he, quote,
wanted to look just like her. And before you say that these are anecdotal evidence, just note
that in a survey of trans inmates in federal prisons, half were convicted of sexual assault and 90% were convicted of violent crimes well above the general prison population.
Now, it should also be noted that in each of these cases, each of these perpetrators had either changed their pronouns, had undergone transition, or had received gender-affirming therapy and accommodations thereof.
Why is this important to note? Probably for the same reason we recognize as a society
that you do not affirm that people with anorexia can be healthy in any way. You do not affirm that
somebody with schizophrenia is hearing voices, and you do not affirm that somebody in a manic
episode is having great ideas, because when you leave somebody to that somebody in a manic episode is having great ideas.
Because when you leave somebody to languish in their false mental state, i.e. men who think they are women,
they will inevitably lash out and harm themselves and those around them, hurt people, hurt other people.
But I don't want to pretend and have the hubris to think that I'm going to be the one to
change your mind. I'm happy to share any and all of these examples with you, but you will most
likely leave here tonight believing that men can become women, affirming care works, and that you
made the right vote. But you will no longer be able to look into the eyes of your constituents
and honestly say that you are unaware of the assaults that inevitably take place when we declare to women you have no right to privacy.
Thank you very much.
Thank you, Ms. Larabee.
Very well said by a gay man.
Too bad it doesn't matter.
Very well said.
Dean, all people suffer actually all society cares about
is optics and appeasing the lgbt mafia people with real problems get ignored that's probably
a better way to state it than i said it well thank you for the course correction great way to put it
like how did you choose this suffering and why is this one so important and what was the data used
to be like this is what we're going to fix. Thanks.
This is a great, great question.
And something I've been hammering home lately.
Why does everyone focus on men dressed as women?
I barely ever hear about people going on about women becoming men because women aren't fucked up like that.
Yeah.
Men do all the bad shit.
It's never it's never.
I can't believe it. I was in a parking lot and a woman jumped in her car and started masturbating next to me.
You never hear that.
But you do hear, I was in a parking lot at Walmart, and a guy jumped in my car and started jerking off to me.
It's happening right now somewhere.
Right now somewhere in the United States, I'm willing to bet my life on it, there's a man masturbating in public somewhere.
There is not a woman 24 hours a day masturbating in public somewhere
hey allison yc you guys are nuts yeah literally hey was it you're coming on something where like
people were my ball sack runneth over semen must escape i mean that's that's go ahead sorry susan
i was gonna say i think it was on youtube and i saw all these people like writing and like looting
something and then somebody commented just like a random was like and did
we realize the common denominator right like insinuating race and then you commented back
yes they're all men yeah it's all men yeah it's the strongest correlate they're all dudes
think of all the worst shit murder all the dudes running hey all the dudes running into the into
the louis vuitton store and stealing shit all black dudes fine all the fucking idiots in the
mosh pit all white dudes yeah and then i don't care like the color is just irrelevant it's just
and then you find out there's sexual assault or woman's prudent and it turns out that was a dude
too yeah yeah yeah Still a dude.
Black dudes like handguns.
White dudes like machine guns.
It does like – it doesn't – it still does guns. I thought you were going to say white dudes like kids.
Right, right, right, right.
They all rape women.
They all equally – all the colors, all the things with penises do weird sexual shit.
And the way our society is moving to like feminize them and not allow any sort of aggression outlet, whether it be martial arts or exercise in schools or lifting weights or just any of that shit.
What do you think? Where do you think all that energy goes?
It doesn't just go away.
It manifests into all this weird shit that you're that you're seeing now.
The public mass shootings, this whole entire transgender movement that's coming through
like all this the stuff with the sports like all that pent-up energy has to go somewhere for the
guys and if you don't give them an outlet and get them outside and get them moving bad shit starts
to happen watch this watch this mental gymnastics here watch this okay uh a pool boy but seven one
time i was cleaning a family's pool and the household milf tried to
lure me into her bedroom obviously i went but that's not the point men can be victims too now
listen the reason why she did that the reason why she did that was because some dude had gotten to
her when she was 12 and so her only worth now is uh through seducing and getting cocked she's
validated by cock so the the origins of that are still a dude that was also the origin story of
mike's pool boy nickname i i chubbed up a little bit just hearing just reading that that that's
how fucking that's how dudes are hey 80 of the guys in the audience are just like, wow, I'd like to hear that story.
His last sentence was, obviously, I win.
Yeah.
I mean, it's crazy.
It's crazy.
I'm like, wow, this is cool.
That's cool.
Because all three of us in here would be like, yeah, dude.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Out there skimming the pool.
Yeah.
Hot chicken.
Can you help me with something in the bedroom?
Oh, hi, Mrs. Robinson.
Sure.
Whatever do you need, Mrs. Robinson. Sure. Whatever do you need?
Mrs. Robinson. Bricked up.
Bernie Gannon.
If the shopping cart guy was out and about
doing his job, the flashers and masturbators
wouldn't be so brazen in all the parking lots.
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.
That was the downfall of society
once the cart guy went away it was all down yeah yeah the cart guy wasn't just getting carts before
you idiots felt became tools of the man and felt obligated to take his job he was also adding a bit
of security witness security dude the the instagram is just full of brazen robberies now can you believe what you're
seeing it's just like just like people like i saw one yesterday i wonder if i have it it was a guy
with a blowtorch so they have the the the targets now have you seen this um uh the targets now have
like everything behind uh doors. Yeah.
And,
and they showed a guy,
I saw an Instagram clip,
a guy came in with a blowtorch and tort was torching,
torched a bunch of doors in like target.
And then,
and then all the doors pop open and then he scooped all this stuff.
Yeah.
A tank with a fucking fire.
Fucking nuts.
I'll see if I can. I'm sure it's in my notes somewhere
right they've gotten to the point where they're like putting those putting shampoo in those cases
yeah everything right individually case right shampoos yeah right you know what i did see
which was really bizarre most of those videos i see are like um black dudes like in like CVS or like a Walgreens. But I saw like a car full of white dudes,
like with black mustaches and shit.
It was a trip, and they were only stealing soap, detergent.
It was like six white dudes.
Did you see that?
Yeah.
Just stealing shitloads of detergent.
Yeah, that was so weird.
Oh, it's so weird.
Hey, and everyone just films that shit with their cameras
while the dudes are doing it.
And then did you see at the last minute they wiped out,
they had their license plate covered
and someone wiped, as the car drove away,
someone hit their...
Oh, really?
Yeah, I didn't see that part.
I don't remember that part.
Probably stole it anyways. Oh, really? I didn't see that part. I don't remember that part. Probably a story.
Anyways.
Number 70, take your child out of school.
Guys, just take your kid out of school.
I swear to God.
Seriously, just take your kid out of school.
It's time.
I love just that blanket statement, though.
Just take – it doesn't even matter.
But, Sevan, I can't afford it.
Your kid's 10.
Just leave him at home and turn the TV on. It doesn't matter. Turn the TV on. Yeah. I swear to God it doesn't even matter. But, Sevan, I can't afford it. Your kid's 10. Just leave him at home and turn the TV on.
It doesn't matter.
Turn the TV on.
Yeah.
I swear to God it doesn't even matter anymore.
Do the veal.
That's a nice program.
Yeah, it doesn't even matter.
Seriously, just pull your kid out of school.
It doesn't matter.
Throw bags every day before you leave the house because you got to go to work.
You're 9 to 5.
Throw a box of granola bars on the ground and leave a gallon of milk in the fridge and everything will be fine.
Better than this.
Okay, here we go. Action. Guys, it's official. California has just entered
the next level of Orwellian hellscape. They just passed Assembly Bill 957, which basically states
that if the state deems you to be a child abuser because you're refusing to affirm your child's
gender identity, they will legally kidnap your child, put them
in foster care, pump them full of puberty blockers, get them on taxpayer-funded surgery pathways,
and there's nothing you can do about it. There's nothing you can say. California is not the first
state to do this. It's totally legal in Washington as well. But what I want to know is what person
in America, what human being actually stands on the left or the right or in the middle or whatever and says, absolutely, the government can kidnap your kid? Absolutely. How does that make sense? In what realm does that seem like a logical thing? Don't parents have rights? Don't parents know their kids better than anyone? I would think they would. Guys, we've got to wake up.
And take that nose ring out
wow i was on uh the legislative thing.gov that's absolutely true just like word for word
oh it's crazy yeah that's crazy some people are some people are like oh it won't happen to me oh
you just wait anyone can make up anything now and your kids will just be taken from you uh 74
protect your kids from this.
Is that the moment?
Is that the tipping point that the state owns more power over your kids than you do?
The state has now more autonomy over the philosophical ideologies that are being implanted into your kids than you do.
Because if yours brushes up against that and the kid decides, hey, you're not letting me be this way, then the state now is going to come in and say well we we think we know better we're taking your kids because we want them to
think this way we're going to affirm it because isn't it just a philosophical ideology that
they're talking about they're not talking about an actual act of like drugs in the home left in
a car not being fed police police so it's literally this philosophical ideology that now the state now has the authority to come in and say
you're not in agreeance with our philosophical ideologies therefore we can make better decisions
and raise your kids better than you can is that thought police happens because people realize
that it's not you think that your boy shouldn't transition to a woman and so now we take your
kids away that's right it's not a physical abuse or some
sort of mental abuse that's happening there's basically saying like you're not believing the
same way that your kids do in the way the state thinks so now we're just going to go ahead and
remove them from that situation and remove them from your ability to raise them the way you see
fit is this true a few years ago bleaching skin sammy soza's bleached his skin michael jackson
really bleached his skin that's true yeah bleached his skin. That's true.
Yeah, I thought that was true.
That's fucking nuts.
Do not.
That stuff never turns out good.
No one do that stuff.
Don't let surgeons go at you for cosmetic shit, please.
Do not do that.
Do you know what's fucking crazy?
A really good friend of mine called me the other day and was talking to me about the rogan uh rfk interview and they're like holy shit did you know that the injections are bad for you uh michael jackson was diagnosed with the skin disorder vitiligo, which resulted in white patches on his skin.
What is it?
Vitiligo.
Vitiligo, thank you.
He was diagnosed with the skin disorder vitiligo, which results in the white patches on the skin and sensitivity to sunlight.
To treat the condition, he used fair-colored makeup and likely skin-bleaching prescription creams to cover up the uneven blotches.
That was stupid stupid he shouldn't
have done that a jake chapman with a good question do you think michael jackson went to live on
neptune all right take your kids out people here we This is going to be just a full, full attack on the schools and on parents. Brace your egos, people. Brace your egos. Here we go.
What number is this?
Our Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau, has said this week that parents who are concerned about what's going on with their children in schools are far right.
Parents who don't want to be cut out of the conversation or completely left out when their
child decides to change their name, change their pronouns, or transition. I want to read you guys number 41 out of the 45 communist goals as read into the
congressional record in 1963. There's 45 and here's number 41. Emphasize the need to raise
children away from the negative influence of parents. Attribute prejudices, mental blocks, and retarding of children
to suppressive influence of parents.
I want to read you number 17.
Get control of the schools.
Use them as transmission bolts for socialism and current communist propaganda.
Soften the curriculum.
Get control of teachers' associations.
Put the party line in textbooks.
You guys can have a look for yourself.
It's time to wake up, parents.
Oh, it won't happen to my kids.
Right. You just
wait.
This bill that passed in California doesn't matter if your kids are
in school or not.
Oh, right. I agree.
So it's not about taking it out of school like
literally just california now dude because i could go over your house and say hey i saw this and
this heaven didn't agree with it now i think that those kids are in a situation i could be in safe
way with my kid i could be at the skate park with my kids and someone could report it yeah yeah
totally but insane but but when your kids are at school, they're alone. Oh, yeah. No, no. I. Yeah. But you're right. But you're right.
It's sending them into the cave for sure there. But I'm just saying it like that doesn't matter as far as like somebody coming after you under this bill.
This is the best use of the word bigot I've seen in a long time.
Trudeau will keep winning. He had he has brainwashed Canada that they are bigots if they don't vote for him.
Yeah. When he's the biggest
bigot of them all it's crazy um for whatever this it's worth i'm gonna read this to you someone sent
this to me um and it's just i know i kind of guess i'm preaching to the choir with the live calling
show but it says i don't understand why brian Friend wasn't included. This is from Reddit. Well, first of all, how do you know if Brian Friend wasn't included or included?
Like, they're referring to last night's show.
Brian is always, always welcome on the fucking show.
If Brian was like, hey, I want to come on that show, he would be.
What?
Do you want me to show it?
Oh, sure, sure.
Okay, sure.
Thank you.
You're a good dude, Caleb.
Yeah, sure. Did you find it? Sure, sure. Okay, sure. Thank you. You're a good dude, Caleb. Yeah, sure.
Did you find it on Reddit?
No.
And then someone writes,
and by the way, when I see those,
even those emojis trigger me on Reddit.
I have zero info on that,
but there's a chance that big media entities,
experts do not want to participate in an initiative by some other entity.
I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about.
Is English your second language?
There's no big media entities anywhere near CrossFit, by the way.
The biggest media entity in CrossFit is this show, and it's a fucking drop in the fucking cum bucket.
I certainly would like to
have friend and someone from talking elite fitness included included what the fuck is this even i
shouldn't have even read this i'm flipping out now plus what are they talking i wonder what the
topic of this was was that about the show we did last night plus more non-us pronouns. Personalities. Shut the fuck up, dude.
Listen, Pedro's always welcome too.
The show's fucking on at 6.30 at night and he's asleep.
Yeah.
It seems like Brian Friend is starting to distance himself
from the others.
From what others?
Anyway.
I guess I'm just stoked that people are postulating
and making shit up.
But learn how to talk.
I'll tell you who didn't come on the show who I invited.
I invited Bill Grundler specifically.
I have to spend time with my kids or some shit like that.
I'm offended.
He'll be on next Friday's show.
Is Willie good?
I think so.
No, I'll promise for him
brian brian's been super duper busy he's doing a ton of shit
but go to be friendly fitness if you want your fucking massive dose of brian he's over there working his ass off um what else is there a douchebag moving jumping jacks and holding
the ball oh oh okay this is just a little political commentary here come back it was my mom's nickname
in high school someone wrote that my goodness that is not cool wow wow backshot oh was your mom's nickname in high school oh okay fine i thought you said
like when you said your mom i thought you're talking about your own mom i was like that's not
cool uh dean i'll get your comment just a second I want to say something. So my kids play this dodgeball in jiu-jitsu class.
And the way they play it, it's not the way we used to play it in school.
We used to play it as you were in a circle, and there were dudes in the circle,
and then you sat on the outside of the circle, and you threw balls at the people
until there was one man standing.
But now the way they play dodgeball is there's a room and it's split in two and the balls start in the middle
and they say go and everyone runs and grabs the ball and you throw the ball and in jiu-jitsu class
um when they play that if you get hit with the ball you have to do 10 jumping jacks
and and i notice there's two kinds of kids there's the douchebag When he gets hit, he holds the ball when he does the jumping jacks.
He's not a team player.
Right?
Instead of handing it off so his team can keep throwing balls,
he's like, fuck that, I got hit,
but when I'm done doing my jumping jacks, I'll throw the ball.
That's more, that's really, root that shit out that is evil mental
illness mental illness yeah anyway i just did this little uh free political commentary did you
play i've never heard dodgeball played like that we had we hey the way we had we had a dodgeball
court out on the um this on the 77 to 85 there were two two circles. There's a circle, and then outside of that circle, there's a circle that's a little bigger.
So one circle is probably like 20 feet in diameter, and then the circle out –
diameter is the line all the way across?
Yeah.
Okay.
So one circle had like a 20-foot or 24-foot diameter,
and then the next one was like four feet bigger than that, say a 28-foot diameter.
And the people who were going to be drilled had to be on the inside and then the people who throw
the ball on the outside and the people on the inside never get to throw the ball at you they're
just like and the people on the outside throw the ball to people on the inside it's cool until
there's one dude left and that dude wins it's cool right yeah so there's balls coming from all ways it's so much
better than the new way they do it that movie dodgeball ruined the game it kind of redefined
the game great movie though seven why don't feminists love crossfit it's truly a feminist
dream of equality inside a sport it's it's a rhetorical question because all they want to do
is complain but still um okay i you, but I think they do.
I think that CrossFit is a haven for lesbians, as it should be.
I think that there's tons of fucking lesbians in the sport, and for those reasons.
Equal pay, equal movement, can be strong, can just do all the shit that dykes want to do.
It's awesome. it's fucking great i and um even the lesbians i can't stand ideologically that are just fucking
i just need to be slapped every time i interact with them i fucking love them i'm sure i can't
think of one all the lesbians and crosses that i've ever just like hung with are fucking cool
as shit it's when they post shit that y'all want to slap the shit out of them are you fucking kidding me like you're living the dream this is your dream kingdom and you're
shitting on it in here you want more inclusivity like fuck dude this is the one place no one cares
about your fucking sexuality boys and girls love you equally isn't that funny that even if like
certain groups of people would get together and do good, it never actually gets, you know, it's never like, oh, this group of young men went over and rebuilt this old woman's house.
It's like, no, this group of men went over and egged the house.
It's like the feminists are not are no longer like propping up CrossFit for all it stands for.
It's like, no, we're still just going to find a reason to complain.
Right.
It's all just negative shit.
Oh, that's interesting. Not all of them of course it only takes one or two to rotten apples to spoil the oh they're just saying that's what
gets highlighted that's what gets highlighted in the media though you know when when when i worked
at um when i used to work at my dad's wine and cheese store and i'd be seven years old and i
would work behind the counter and people would ignore me sometimes
like they wouldn't
I'd be standing right there and they'd be like looking around
I'd be like can I help you and they're like no
and then my dad would walk by and they're like how much is this bottle of wine
and then afterwards I'd tell my dad like why don't they ask me
and I used to be like really offended
it was like a regular theme of mine
and I wish my dad would have just been like, hey, jackhole, you're fucking seven.
That's how everyone treats seven-year-olds.
Don't own that shit.
Don't worry about it.
Be bigger than that.
It's okay.
It's totally normal.
Like, if you're, like, don't be, like, everyone treats everyone different.
If you're a black dude, they treat you different. If you're a black dude, they treat you different.
If you're 6'5", they treat you different.
If you're Asian, they treat you different.
If you're short, they treat you different.
Just accept it.
Quit complaining about it.
Right?
Like it's okay.
You're a 6'4 black guy.
Everyone treats you different than me.
I'm a 5'5 Armenian dude. It's okay. You're a 6'4 black guy. Everyone treats you different than me. I'm a 5'5 Armenian dude.
It's totally different.
People clutch their purse when you walk by, but you also get a ton of pussy at the bar.
No one grabs their purse when I walk by.
I get no pussy at the bar.
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's just the way it is, man.
It's just the way it is.
Yeah.
It's totally like – it's fine.
Work with what you have.
Susan has to buy girls one drink at the bar to get his dick sucked.
I need 17 and I have to wait till after closing.
Maybe it's a tranny.
And I'm okay with it.
I work with what I got.
Fuck.
Get it in where you fit it.
Since when did Seve's dad's liquor store get upgraded to a wine and cheese store?
Hey, listen.
Quit listening so closely to my –
Quit listening so closely to my –
The details of my show.
Hey, what's up?
You're just on the phone now?
I'm just in the middle of the podcast.
This is going crazy.
In the past, I'd have never answered if you called because I was
trying to hide you, but now I'm glad.
Oh, God.
I'll call you when I'm done. I'm almost done.
Okay, bye.
Bye.
Someone just
texted me and says,ussia is undergoing an uprising
oh here we go yeah yeah yeah exactly if you're handsome you're a stud when you
holler at girls if you're ugly you're a creep how about this blade how about this blade i'm
a 40 year old dude who hits on 20 year old women and i'm a scumbag unless i'm worth 100 million dollars
normal totally cool yeah it's totally fine and listen no one be like no one be like yeah that's
unfair i'm that's totally fair i'm okay with that i understand listen i'm the exact same way
if some 75 year old woman was like hey uh do you want to go out with me and i and she rolled down her window
from a rolls royce like one of those new ones like where the fucking thing goes up and down
the hood ornament i'd come home and be like hey babe hey what i'm like this fucking rich bitch
wants to date me we have but if it was some lady who and i would i would like field test the waters
you know what i mean but if it was some lady in a and I would like field test the waters. You know what I mean?
But if it was some lady in a fucking Volkswagen bug with the fucking newspaper stacked in the back, I ain't doing it.
I ain't coming home and telling my wife that like – I would tell her like just to show off, but I ain't telling her like I want to date her.
I ain't testing the waters.
Hey, if I date this fucking – it could change our life, babe. I know she's 75.
I know you don't want me banging other chicks but she's rich as shit
yeah she's rich as shit
could change our lives
hey I bet you if you took a poll of dudes and say would you rather
be a really good looking
guy or have a really high like
net worth and access to cash
every guy would rather choose the access
to cash because it gives you more
status than looking good
you can look good but if you're broke the ugly dude shows up with the access hey you want to
hop my car we're gonna jump in my jet we're gonna fly over to london and have some dinner you're
gonna be like oh fuck later good looking guy i'm going with that dude harvey weinstein yeah it's
he was fucking job of the fucking hut he was one of the most disgusting looking men on planet Earth.
But he was a gatekeeper and he had a lot of money.
Yeah.
So you want access?
You better give me access.
Look at Blade.
That's called a sugar daddy.
Yeah.
It ain't tricking if you got it.
Sevan, are you far right like Trudeau said?
No, I don't know what I am anymore.
We don't do labels around here bro a 70 would you spend the night with a 97 year old bloke is that a dude a bloke for 10 million yeah let me spend the night with them yep sell my soul
for 10 million what do you mean just a handy just a handy just you joking just a handy? Just a handy. You're joking with just a handy? Wait, wait. Is that weird?
Is that weird?
For $9 million, can I wear it?
Hey, what if you started really breaking it down?
Listen.
You put your mouth on it, it's $20 million.
You jerk it off, it's $10 million.
You can wear gloves, and it's $5 million.
Okay, I'd jerk a dude off for $10 million.
That's fine.
Take the barehanded jerk off for $10 million.
But if my forearm blows up and I have to switch hands, want 12 mil you better pay for my peptides hey when i'm truly older i can't
wait till i get a little more free and i can really there's some funny hand job jokes that
i tell in private man darn it i'm not even free enough to tell on this show. I'm massaging my forearm now.
I'm prepping it.
You tell that bloke I'm prepping.
Getting warmed up.
Yeah.
Wait, Dean, why does it mean that I'm woke?
Dean said I'm woke.
Sousa is not woke.
What's actually fascinating about Sousa probably – I have to go.
What's fascinating about Sousa in all honesty is the fact that he runs a CrossFit gym and does this show.
That could be a whole other show. If it doesn't – if I don't break in between the two.
And Sousa's in a uh um i would say very liberal area
probably i mean probably a large majority of his clients are black white or other and and gay and
and like they get it like he's doing it he's running a successful gym having fun on this show
and maintaining a a truly safe space a welcome environment for anyone
anyone's welcome he's probably got a tranny in his gym so got it all yeah livermore california's
fucking just right out that's just right out the city baby they all have the same thing in common
they come do crossfit um all right guys thank you uh Caleb, I don't know if I should thank you, but –
You made it come back.
You made it come back.
It's nice seeing your face at least, your computer skills today.
This is the worst show you've ever done.
I want you to – June 24, 2023, Caleb's worst show.
Date it.
Sousa, thank you for stepping in
uh
I will see all you guys
it sounds like tomorrow's the peptide show
are you
will you be on for that too
are you coming on for that Caleb
yes
yeah it'd be good to have you here
okay
um
oh here we go
Jeremy World
I'm offering my security services
services if Seve comes to Madison
dude that's awesome
oh perfect
I fucking love you.
We're set now. No one's fucking with us.
I just felt my sphincter relax
like a half centimeter.
Rolling around with him.
I'm not even joking.
I'm not even joking.
Racist.
Alright.
I'll talk to you guys soon.
Bye-bye.