The Sevan Podcast - Matt Torres & Colton Mertens #963
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Oh, my shit's up.
Wow.
Wow.
Oh, my power must have gone off here.
Wow.
Okay.
Sorry.
Got it.
I see what's going on there.
I might have to restart my computer.
Hold on.
What the heck is going on here?
You're going to have to reboot?
I don't know. me just let me just try my my um my something's wrong with my mic this whole uh road setup i've never seen this before just
turned off let me just turn it on and off how are you oh good man i was thinking about rebooting
like you were thinking about what say that again rebooting you know like you know when you reboot
your computer like all
right let's start this thing over yeah i have a lot of days as of recently where i'm like man i
just want to reboot myself real quick like take ayahuasca or something uh honestly ayahuasca kind
of scares me yeah me too did you ever used to fuck around with hallucinogenics yeah i've i've done mushrooms before
it's kind of it's kind of like the reboot right oh here we go oh yeah here we go oh we get do you
sound good in your own ears oh i did for a second now it's gone again oh shoot shoot shoot shoot
so you're saying let can't hear yourself.
Hold on. The show's all
yours. Hold on. Remember, when I leave,
the whole world can still see you.
Don't do anything crazy like pick out a big, giant
booger or something.
Thanks for the heads up.
I apologize for that.
I don't know what's... You good?
Wow.
Okay. Here we go. Can you hear me?
Holy smokes. Wow. You sound phenomenal.
Matt, we're basically cousins. I don't know if she's talking to you, but okay.
You know her, Jody Lynn?
You can't see the resemblance? Look at us.
Oh, yeah. You're right. No.
Hi, good morning.
Thanks for doing this.
Yeah, man, for sure.
It's an easy morning over here at 10 o'clock.
It's interesting that you say sometimes some mornings you wake up and you think about a reboot.
By reboot, how deep are you talking about?
Like change your religion, change your life, change your job your job change your sex change like how deep of a reboot because when i think of people who want to do ayahuasca or they want to reboot it's it's that there's something that's nagging you that maybe you
want to transcend right like you want to be set free from some sort of thought yeah i can see that
that's like that's like six layers deep i'm thinking just like mental reboot for the day you
know it's like uh that's not how
i want things to start let me you know let me just shut everything off real quick and then i'll turn
the day back on dude i say stuff to my wife and my kids daily that i'm wish that i that sets a tone
or a mood that i that i wish i could have wish i would not have said that i I wish I could have – wish I would not have said,
that I wish I could reboot?
Yeah.
I find myself – I probably have maybe two days a month where I'm like, okay.
And maybe everyone goes through this, but you're just like, look,
everyone's getting the short end of the stick from me today.
I have no control of this, and it's just how it's going to be.
Yesterday it was my, I was sleeping.
I was, it was 4th of July and I was sleeping by a pool on some patio furniture.
And when I'm, and I had a t-shirt over my face to block the sun and my kid came and took the t-shirt off my face.
And I said to him, Hey, why did you do that?
Why'd you wake me up?
And right when I said that, I was like, I should not have said that.
Yeah. I broke his little, i broke his little heart yeah are you saying are you saying that that the darkness in your life while your eyes are closed is better than
a smile on your kid's face at that time yeah i guess that is what i'm saying what a fucking dumbass
what a dumbass coach matt that's a thought that's adulthood right. Your kid won't get it until he reaches your age.
Yeah, but I should have got it.
You'll just mess them up psychologically.
Right, right.
That's the kind of shit kids will remember forever.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
Forever.
Some wild memories that I have, just some randomness, just traveling around the state and just like, you know, I, you know, you know, the way we grow up is like, this is the only like, this is, this is what my parents, you know, this is how they're supposed to raise me. It's all we know. And as we get older, like, subconsciously, we are so fucked by our parents.
we are so fucked by our parents you know it's like i have no control of these choices that i'm making now and i have to fight tooth and nail sometimes to decide what's right and what's wrong
based upon the fact of you know what my parents thought was correct growing up can you give me
an example anything possible so i guess yeah so the best example would be like your parents disciplining you, right?
I know I grew up in an age where, you know, my parents hit me and fine, right?
So I'm curious now if I get mad and I have this outburst of like rage, like an instantaneous, just like, oh, like that.
I guess, oh, I just want to hit you.
Is that based on the fact that my parents were hitting me when I got in trouble?
When I was a kid?
Like, that's what I'm wondering.
Subconsciously, is this where it's coming from?
Because I don't see myself as like, you know, someone with a lot of rage, right?
But if I feel that instant.
Now, granted, I did play football and that rage was
in there at times you know when you got to do something you know don't really have a choice
you got to hit this guy in the head and so those are just questions that i ask myself without
getting too deep into it is the things that we do now and perhaps things that we might see
ourselves as like that's not really a positive but I want the world to see my friends or, you know, my family or,
you know, my athletes,
but sometimes you can't control some of these things subconsciously it's in
there. And, you know, so the question always goes back to,
is it something that we naturally just pick up, you know,
being raised as a kid.
Or maybe you can control it, but if you're like, if, if you're at, you know,
to go back to sort of your simple, quick analogy,
if you're at level six and it comes in,
if you have level six awareness and the anger comes in at level five,
it'll control you.
But if you're hanging out at level three and the anger comes in at level five you'll see it and then you can be like i'm not
i'm not grabbing that you know what i mean yeah yeah my wife would always tell me
the ability to see it i think yeah like that control to even see it coming is that's max
level right there man like you know you can you can get places like
that it's it's the ones that you can't see that just sneak up on you that's where things start
to get a little troublesome my wife would tell me that it's not it's not the hitting the kids
that's bad it's not the getting angry that's bad it's the fact that you're teaching your kids that the coping mechanism
during a situation is to lose control that's what i mean people just go straight to the fact like
yeah you shouldn't fucking hit your kids right okay cool yeah don't fucking backhand yourself
as hard as you can but she's saying like you don't want to show you and and i all the coolest people
i've ever known in my whole life are the people who are in control of of themselves right
they're cool motherfuckers right yeah it's funny that you say that like trying to figure it out on
your own so someone brought this up to my attention may have been my sister she said that a lot of
people use uh fitness as their therapy and their outlet and it's like you have to be able to figure your shit out on your own without having
to go do something uh you know outside of your body to make to heal the things that's happening
inside of your body right so they're almost using fitness as their crutch even though it could you
know give you all these great things you know um healthy this and physical that and whatnot. But at the end of the day,
you can't use fitness to forget about or to help you get through without really being able to say,
you know, I got to figure this shit out on my own. Like I got to look at myself in the mirror,
figure out these problems and figure out the solutions to these things. And it reminded me,
like when you said that just now about, you know,
handling how you'd want your kids to handle it.
That's what it reminded me of.
And, you know, we live in this world of fitness, right, all around us.
You and I, where, you know, we see it all the time.
And, I mean, even taking it a step further, as a gym owner,
I used to think people came into my gym because they wanted to be fit
for whatever reason, like you fill in the blank why they came in for fitness.
And what I started noticing is that people were actually escaping things like alcoholics,
you know, trauma, you know, something in the relationship. And they were using fitness to step away from that,
to help them forget those things.
And I really didn't start noticing,
and I'm not saying everyone was doing that,
but there was a lot of people that were doing it,
where it's like, okay, that's a good thing.
But at what point is it something where it's like,
we still got to fix that problem that is breaking us,
as opposed to like putting that bandaid on it. You know, it's like we still got to fix that problem that is breaking us as opposed to like
putting that band-aid on it you know it's like my wife leaves me you know i'm 30 pounds overweight
i look super skinny now or i lost all this weight is she coming back to me or not right like or is
there something that you got to work out by yourself prior to losing or getting healthier fit or
whatnot, even though that's an amazing, tremendous feat.
I was always, for me, you're describing me perfectly.
I fully medicate with fitness.
And I used to medicate like with nicotine or I, you know,
I find things that, and you know,
there's people who medicate with like music. Right. but yeah, for me, fitness is a fix all. Um, I, I want to think clearly I go work out. I
feel bad about something I ate. I go work out. Um, I'm, I'm tired. I don't go sleep, Matt.
I go work out. Yeah. You know what I mean? For me, like, it's like, it's like a, I didn't see
the movie, but there was this movie movie my big fat Greek wedding and someone
told me in the movie they use Windex to fix
everything
and it used to be like that for me for cigarettes
it becomes just like a coping mechanism
you're upset you smoke cigarette you're
you're tired you smoke cigarette
like that too you're hungry and you don't
want to eat dietary aid
smoke cigarette and it was fucking man
this is I found the wonder drug and fitness is that for sure for sure yeah it's funny you said that
yeah uh what did what do you say the greek people use the cleaner spanish people use vapor rub
oh yeah yeah my dad was you i'm armenian my dad put vapor on yeah everything yeah oh for everything yeah
yes that's that's it great is that what you are are you 100% Spanish
yeah yeah majority yeah Cuban Puerto Rican um you know there's a little Honduras and it's wild
man it's like my my father's side they're you know orange hair, freckles, green, blue eyes.
It's wild.
Like Canelo?
Like kind of Canelo?
Like the boxer?
Yeah.
Yes.
Yes.
That's legitimately my dad's sister.
Okay.
Pale skin, freckles.
Man, it's wild.
Always curly-ass hair, too, man.
I don't have to get crazy on it but
you know i can see i can see armenian from you though yeah i'm all i'm i'm i'm all uh mom and
dad yeah this guy this this is a cool looking dude right canelo yeah mexican too right yeah
what a trippy looking mexican i don know. It's kind of, yeah.
That's wild.
That is wild.
Your sister has red hair?
No, no, my dad's sister.
Oh, your dad's sister, sorry.
Yeah, right.
No, my sister's like, we kind of look alike.
We're 14 months apart, so we look more alike.
Same mom and dad?
Yeah. 14 months apart. Same mom and dad? Yeah.
14 months apart.
Yeah, they weren't playing.
No.
Just one?
No.
So I'm the youngest.
I have an older brother.
My brother is blonde hair, light skin.
Looks more like my father if we would.
There's these two dudes who do a podcast on my YouTube station,
J.R. Howell and Taylor Sugg.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
And J.R. owns CrossFit Crash,
and then he does the Crash Crucible, that competition.
And then Taylor has the SMT training.
He's over at Charlotte.
And they just started doing the show on my channel
on Wednesdays. And I'm really excited and flattered, right? Like part of me, like I had this
thought in my head, like these fucking idiots, they should do it on their own channel. Like I'm
like, Oh yeah, come over here. Yeah, that's great. Yeah. Pretty smart. But today someone in the
comments this morning wrote, these two should start their own channel and i wrote back to them on the
youtube comments uh your mom should start an only fans yeah i agree do you feel that way if someone
tried to poach one of your clients the alpha is like i wonder if torres feels that way if like
someone comes over and talks to one of his clients like yo get the fuck away that's that's the that's the main reason why i asked uh my athletes to move down i was watching
um like a re a re like a rerun of the 2021 games it was like i was with emma uh and we just finished
that day we came back i was just like watching the rerun of it and so i forgot who it was i think
it was one of the guys on talking elite fitness he He was like, Shane Orr is watching Emma Carey finish this workout, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
I'm curious if –
Say that again.
You broke up.
Oh, shit.
You broke up.
Oh, that was a good one.
So Shane Orr came over and talked to your girl, and you had to light him up?
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Shane was just watching it.
Who knows what he was watching?
He was just watching people work out.
Right.
Right.
Yeah.
He's a coach.
I lost your video.
I lost your video.
Uh, Matt.
Oh, you did?
Yeah.
All right.
Hold up.
If you have to log out and log back in, you can't.
What a great story.
I think I vaguely, I think I vaguely remember this.
No, you're black still.
Unless that's the way you want to look.
I didn't mean to,
uh,
the judge.
It ain't that hot around here.
Hold on.
All right.
Uh,
please.
Ryan.
Uh,
yeah,
you can't be scared to lose an athlete.
If there's someone out there better for them.
So be it.
Yeah,
I hear you.
I hear you.
Don't ruin the conversation.
We're on a roll.
Don't,
don't bring it like some adult shit in here ryan something like adult shit no fuck that
fight to the death keep your shit uh bernie gannon uh okay here we go mr torres is back
sorry good all right okay okay so i i remember that too shane was watching i do remember that
too yeah and then one of the commentators was like, Oh,
this could be the next girl that Shane brings over to prove him.
And you know, I don't know. I just, I don't know.
Your mom definitely like, no,
your mom's going to be the next girl I bring over to prove.
Exactly. All right. So check it. So this is what I was thinking.
When you're talking, when you're talking about the two guys using the podcast, that's like ESPN, man.
It's like ESPN is the platform, and you have Skip Bayless and whatever,
Shannon Sharp, is on your platform.
If they go do their own thing now yes i could see them doing
fairly well but you put them together years ago they come and go it's like whatever they could
be replaced right i wouldn't recommend those two guys do any of it let alone uh listen to the lady
that was saying you should go do your own thing right you know what i think happens it's been a conversation that
um i've been having a lot lately is also people
i think people forget where their synergy and like they think that that um or they have people
chirping in their ears that maybe that they shouldn't be having you know chirping in their
ears you know what i mean yeah it would like it would be like one of your god i don't know how to
i i don't want to give a like a direct example um and hurt anyone's feelings but go ahead do it
no i can't i can't it's it's too you can do it you can do it
it would do more you could do it it would do more damage than good i what if you just said
it really quick and a lot of people didn't even catch it right well i'll just you i know taylor
and jr have thick skins and thick skins and i can just uh beat up on them but it would be like if
someone told them hey you it's just like if someone told them hey you should go do your own channel
and missing the point that this channel has been going every morning at 7
AM for two years. And they have no perspective on that.
And then Jr and Taylor hear that. And they're like, yeah,
we are better than seven and they very well could be, but,
but still like they'll fall off the treadmill that gets them a five-year
headstart. And it's just that it's just,
I guess it's almost because people forget why
they started doing something you know like you first start you start let's say you first start
wanting to be a a coach for one reason to help people and then it becomes uh that you want to
win the crossfit games and then you've kind of lost your way yeah that happens a lot man it's
like sometimes you need those things to kind of set
you back on the course that you started on. Or you just simply just transcend to something
different. And you're like, you know what, I'm moving on. No different than this. Right? I got
into, I opened up my first CrossFit gym in 2013. I had this grand plan, I wanted to open up, you
know, five CrossFit gyms, purchase buildings, I just want five CrossFit gyms. And then as of like, I don't know, maybe a year and a half ago, I was like,
you know what? I really want to see this other type of business. Like I get like, I've done this,
like I've done, you know, the, the group fitness, like coaching thing. Like, I'm like, I'm so
content with what I've accomplished in that realm.
I want to go somewhere else, you know, and I'm, you know, in a, in a way, maybe it's,
maybe it's kind of the same thing. Like some people might stay true and be like, this is what
I'm gonna do for the rest of my life. And then one, you know, circumstance happens or another,
or a few are stringed together. And I say, say you know they just want to do something a little different or what what if what if the fact that you want to do something different is you you you
lost the the piece that you lost your way right i think of it kind of is like whatever your purpose
is is your gas station so you need to stay close to it it's kind of like what's fueling you but if
you wander away from it like if it was to help people and you and you then you go just do games athletes or let's say it was to do games
athletes and then you decide no i want to start helping other people and then all of a sudden
you're not getting fulfilled then you wander kind of away from the gas station you're gonna run you're
gonna you're gonna run out of gas is it right or it's wrong maybe maybe the purpose in your life
is to run out of gas at that time. Yeah, that's true.
Are you sure you didn't do ayahuasca this morning?
No, no. I just had this feeling like, I don't know,
sometimes I'm just kind of like this constant kind of microdose,
I guess is the best way of saying it.
If I sleep well,
I'm feeling pretty good. Getting enough caffeine in me.
I usually able to think clearly.
How old are you?
35.
Oh yeah. That's a nice age.
Barbell shrugged. Did this the wrong way?
That was a pot that, that podcast,
that's the guys who stood
up around the they stood up they took their microphones places and stood up right is that
who those guys are is that the guy who's with training think tank now who does who's behind
their computer you never see his face i feel like you know more than i do and you're asking me
questions that are above my pay grade. Okay, fine.
I'm not on the C-level suite, and you're asking me those types of questions right now.
When I did CrossFit Media, I didn't look at any of the media in now the space that I'm in.
I didn't pay any attention to any of it.
That's all right. It allows you to focus on what you need to be focusing in on.
It's like it allows you to focus on what you need to be focusing in on, you know?
There's this scab that I kind of want to pick.
It might not even be there, but I'm thinking about Jason Hopper and Katrin going to the games,
and there being only one Matt.
And I think that, like, you're in that other situation too right it's matt torres and i don't know what's going on there
maybe maybe they don't like you and everyone really wants what what's the other dude at your
place oh dom dom yeah is that what you're saying yeah yeah but how do you how are you – so when I spoke to Matt O'Keefe yesterday, he said Matt's going to do Catrin and Marconi's going to do Hopper.
And I'm thinking, ooh, that can't be good.
It's actually –
Is it like that at your place? You have so many. Let me just tell people really quick. Dallin Pepper, Emma Carey, Fee Sagafi, Daniel Brandon, James Sprague.
Is Nate Ackerman going like as a master's or a kid or something?
Does he go as something?
Sorry, Nate.
But I love you.
At least you got mentioned in the show.
Yeah, he's in that gray area.
He's going to be really, really good.
Nate's going to be really good.
So honestly –
Did I miss anyone before we go?
I don't – did I miss anyone?
No, yeah, that was – actually, that was really good. Like these are all big names. good um so honestly did i miss anyone before we go i don't did i miss anyone no that yeah that's
okay that was actually that was really good like these aren't these are all big names these are
like even people who have names that even if they take i don't even if one of those people were to
take 30th there's going to be eyeballs i mean you know i mean a piece of coffee's got her own little
like kind of cultish following yeah for sure um so last year year we somewhat tested this thing out.
It was me and Don back there with Danielle and Dallin, right?
It was actually really – it was a really good flow because one would be
in the athlete warm-up area.
The other one would be, like, in the corral-ish,
like underneath the arena type deal.
And then we would just text.
And, like, one person would walk with the other,
and then we'd kind of switch off.
So I would typically be with them before they went out onto the floor and dom would
be with the whomever it was danielle or down did it matter who was going first or second uh and then
we would just kind of like switch off boom switch off in some instances uh they would walk back by
themselves and me and dom would be back there with them. Now, what we have going on
this year, we actually practice over at semifinals. So we have three coaches that we absolutely need
in the back, right? So there's two guys and then there's going to be the three girls. It's me,
Dom, and Daniel Connan. I refer to him as DC. DC is another brute coach that used to live down here in naples he lives out in switzerland now um it's it's a really good uh balance of personalities where you know they see me as coach
they see dom and dc as like coach friend as well now i mean we all have you know friend
friendly relationships yes but it's a lot easier to like tell your bro like open up in
this type of way and then you look at your coach and you're like zeroed in and focused and it's
just like you're ready to go kill someone so it's a nice little break for them uh and dom and dc uh
they have their own way of doing things that is refreshing as well. So it's super helpful.
Did I understand that correctly that Dom is bringing you back to earth and you're taking them to the launch pad?
Pretty much, man. Pretty much.
Yeah, I'm like, I'm there just like putting the fuel on the rockets, I guess.
Are you serious? Are are you are you pretty serious
person like are you're are you're uh are your clients watching right now being like whoa that's
the most effort matt talk he's really on fire this morning no no no you know it's like uh
when you know when i go to the gym and i'm coaching them i i'm more serious than i am joking
uh i have i have a tendency to joke a little too much at times so i have to i really do have to I I'm more serious than I am joking. Uh, I have,
I have a tendency to joke a little too much at times.
So I have to,
I really do have to reel it in.
Um,
but I would say the moment that we stepped out of the gym and we're doing anything,
but it's usually just like,
they're trying to figure out if I'm joking or if I'm being serious.
Okay.
Cause I think,
well,
I think of you as a very stoic person.
Yeah, man. Oh dude. And, and the, okay because i think well i think of you as a very stoic person yeah oh dude and like could be interpreted as guarded even um yeah i can see that uh focused focus is really like where it's at okay focused
right yeah i i uh when i played sports especially in college is when it really happened. Everything in my day was planned out to the T.
And even though for me as an athlete at the time, I was like, man, this is like, I feel like I'm always like constrained to these times.
Things just run so much smoother.
So when we're when like just a normal competition day, there's time blocks where they got to be, where they got to be
at these times. So I know exactly where people are and where they need to be. And I'm not stressing
out over anything else besides putting a focus on whatever time block that I need to put on.
And then we move on to the next. So, you know, when I'm out in a competition, it's like that,
you know, the moment the competition ends, like I take my like mask off, you know, and I'm out in a competition, it's like that, you know, the moment the competition ends, like I take my like mask off,
you know, and I'm just like, finally, I can just be me, you know,
just like relax, you know, I don't have to stress anymore. But yeah,
I agree with you. You know, I can, I can see that, you know, serious,
stoic, you know, focused, whatever, you know, whatever fits it during,
during competition, but that's how it needs to be. And I even think like James, serious, stoic, you know, focused, whatever, you know, whatever fits it during, um, during
competition, but that's how it needs to be. And I even think like James, you know, James is,
he's at his best when he's like that, you know, it's just like, he's not kidding around. He's
not joking around as much, you know, and I've known these guys now. Wow. That's a,
that's a pretty strong message you're sending right there. Yeah. I've known these guys now wow that's a that's a pretty strong message you're sending right there yeah i've
known these guys for a you know a long time now i can sense their weakness and how they handle
weakness how they handle anxiety how they handle um lack like if they're lacking confidence what
comes out of them or what is being shown by them and so my goal is to sense it and try to like um
like put that fire out as quickly as I can.
And whatever form it's coming out of.
So if we continue to use James, James, when he's in the back and he's like, you know,
talking just a little too much, he's not really focused.
I can sense that there's just like, he's trying to take his mind away from the task at hand.
Or he's so comfortable because he's X amount of points in that he just he's
lacking the focus and he's like oh comfortable like you know i can let my shoulders relax so
it's like we got to sense whichever one it is and be like yo like if it's the one where he's uh too
comfortable it's like hey look just let's just focus on the step ahead. We have not accomplished anything.
There's still three more workouts left.
Or if it's the other way, it's what can we control right now, James?
Don't worry about what this person's doing.
Don't worry about what that person's doing.
This is your rep scheme.
This is your pace here.
This is how we're going to do this.
It's like any questions.
Everyone has their own little thing.
But, I mean, not to go off on a tangent.
That's just how it is.
You're an optician.
That – no tangent.
That – what you just described was something that Noah played with.
I remember one year at the games.
I came up to him.
He was – I mean, he's one of the – he's a camera guy.
When I used to film behind the scenes, he was like one of the greatest people you could be around.
He was awesome. He gave so much. bridges you know there's this group of people
and one year he was standoffish and i go hey what's up dude and he goes hey uh i'm just i'm
trying something different this year not to be so happy go lucky lighthearted and then after a
couple days he's like this isn't working i'mitting the bed. I'm going back to who I am. Like, does any James seems like I hear you.
I'm just pushing back a little bit.
He seems like the and I believe you as his coach, but he's he's a social creature.
He I mean, he looks like he but he he feels like he belongs a desk talking about the sport i mean
he is fucking gregarious do you ever get concerned like if you dampen that like you might take the
fun out of it for him so if if we take a step back and talk about no again again like no it's
phenomenal he's done amazing things he's had a lot of great events as well some might argue that
noah could be even better you know um if he just put a little bit more attention to detail.
And here's a classic thing that competitively he's created is he starts off too hot and then he loses it at the end.
I'm sure he's heard it so many times before. I'm sure he's went back to film and seen it.
And it's like, I don't know, it may be in his mind.
It alleviates the pressure so he can be his true self. And I agree with it, just be your true self. But also, you got to know when it's time to, like, live, leave one thing, like, you know, the jokes and like the casual, the casualties aside, and put attention to detail now if noah didn't have that those things happen um
you know where people are saying like whatever is noah's paces don't do that right maybe this
is a different conversation and i'm like well yeah you know what i can see that happening um
i think like my experience with james you know, everyone's just a little bit different. My experience with James, when James missed it by one point last year at the semis,
he was the most focused that I've seen him. And so now James is starting to create a more powerful
athlete mentally where he knows when it's time to be serious and it's time to joke. It's like
when the, when the event's done, he can do that, man. Like that's his cool down.
That's his calm down.
He's on the bike.
He's poking fun at people.
He's usually making fun of himself.
Like fine, I'm okay with that.
But the moment that we walk into that arena,
you just have to find focus.
And there's times where you can do it
and there's times where I just got to be a coach
and just tell them I go.
What I'm hearing you say, I just got to be a coach and just tell him I go like,
what I'm hearing you say, what I'm at,
how I'm interpreting what you're saying is,
is as it gets closer to the fucking gun going off, you're telling him, Hey dude,
you're having energy build up inside of you.
That's uncomfortable for you. And you're spending it in ways that you shouldn't sit with that discomfort and
fucking manage that fucking energy.
Yeah. Yeah. And usually, right. Exactly.
And usually it's just, what's the task ahead. Let's just, what's the,
like, I just got to take one step forward. What does it look like? Right.
Like, and yeah, that's, yeah, I think, I think you're right.
Ladies and gentlemen, watch this. Okay. Watch the magic. Um, um uh matt um have you ever uh dated anyone
who's fitter than you i have many times actually yeah yeah girls don't um find that like i just
feel like um uh a girl like um wouldn't uh across a girl wouldn't like me like a games girl because
she like she could deadlift twice what i deadlift and she could bench 50 pounds more than me and she could like like every she would be better than me
at fucking everything yeah you know i would i never really thought about like that i see women
as women you know strong good me too i like this smart you know they could they could be making
baby machines baby smart strong baby machines yeah they could be making baby machines, baby, smart, strong baby machines.
Yeah.
They can be making 10 times more money than I am.
Right.
Um, I think, I think the, I think the moment that we start to think about who they are
and what they do for a living, it takes you out of what you, what is normally you, right?
If they're, if they're attracted to you, it's because of you.
It's, I mean, you would hope so.
Right.
Um, I'm not saying that people are, you people are attracted to different things as far as like, what can they serve for me?
But from my experience, the women that I'm attracted to, the women that I connect with, I can have a very open conversation with them.
And they see who I am from the beginning.
I'm not trying to be the person that I'm not. Right.
So if I, if there's a girl that I'm attracted to and I see she's wearing,
you know, $1,200 heels and you know, a $12,000 watch,
I'm not going to go up there and like try to pretend like I'm this dude that is making equally as much money she is.
I don't know what her financial situation is, but I know she's dressed very expensively.
If I find attraction to her from afar, I'm going to go talk to her.
I'll find out within that conversation if this is something that we could take a step further like getting a number.
The point being is-
Go on a date in your Honda Civic.
Go on a date in your Honda Civic.
Exactly.
Dude, I drove a VW Jetta for like four years, and this was the weirdest transition.
It was like-
That's a straight estrogen mobile.
The amount of high school girls that would pull up next to me, and I would look at them
like, man. Like, look at them like, man.
Like, dude, I know, man.
And you know what's funny is I had three years in that car where I didn't see those things.
I was so okay with what I was doing.
And I had one year because of an old ex-girlfriend that all of a sudden I started to think like, dude, I have cloth seats.
I'm in a Jetta.
Like these, you know what I mean?
Like these high school girls next to me,
like they're probably paying the same bill.
Like they're paying the bill, not their parents paying the bill.
It's like, they're doing their like, whatever,
cleaning tables and whatnot and paying the bill.
And all of a sudden I'm starting to think to myself,
like I'm starting to feel a little insecurity, you know?
And I guess like what I'm trying feel a little insecurity um you know and i guess like what
i'm trying to say is this you know the girl is fitter than me not fitter than me whatever it
doesn't really matter to me um you know if we if we connect it's not based on the fact of her being
fit or not fit good good job ruining a perfectly fucking good question. I appreciate it. Answering the question. Hey, when I worked at CrossFit, I drove one of these back in the day.
It's a Piaggio MP3.
What?
That's three wheels.
Yeah, two in the front and one in the back.
And in high school, I drove a Volkswagen Rabbit.
So let me tell you i and i understand this blue
one in the middle this blue one in the middle though is fucking dope dude like you know i'm
talking about like the the pale one with the little like garage thing in the back with the
trailer oh oh oh this one oh yeah yeah that thing's crazy what i would drive that anyway i used to drive one of those so i under i understand uh
people making fun uh boy they used to really like to yeah so when so when you when you drove past
motorcycles and you're like this they're like fuck you dude you're not one of us
this is this guy you're you're you're part of people's jokes
it's always
he actually had the audacity
to even attempt to
Magnus Holmgren fake motorcycle
speaking of motorcycles
I have this shed and there's four motorcycles in it.
And the other day, like my nephew came over and I have this really insane Harley and he pulls it out and he parks it on my, he wanted to get to something in the back of my shed and he pulls it out and it hasn't been pulled out.
He had to buy a new battery for it and everything hasn't been pulled out in three years.
And he parked it on my, on my front door, right in front of my door.
It's like actually the back of the Harley is touching my front door.
And it's just on my stoop now.
And it's been sitting there for like three weeks.
And I don't have time for anything.
Like I don't want to have time for anything.
I just want to do my kids.
I wish someone would steal that Harley.
I wish like I could just point at shit and it would just vanish.
Or like I could just sell it would go away i there's so much shit i just
don't care about i don't want to have to worry about register i don't even have time to like
pay my registration for my car because i'd rather be doing something with my kids is it like that
with coaching like do you just feel like just you just want to throw everything away in your life
and like just try to live like a monk sleep program
and deal with your your what i'm assuming are like your kids like fuck balance or like matt
torres like just don't you just want to kind of sometimes throw matt torres away so you could work
no so it's funny you mentioned that it's funny you mentioned that story is um i actually i have
this same question that i have with my brother is like I envy that what you just
mentioned is like something that I I can't mentally wrap my head around it I don't know how I'm gonna
do it where you're like all I want to do is spend time with my kids kids all the time yeah my kids
my brother's the same way and I'm like I have such like I have crushing anxiety from like, I don't want to lose.
Right.
And it like keeps me up at night.
And so it's more difficult for me to put my work away because I don't want to know that I didn't do enough for my athletes.
Or someone's like looking at one of my athletes
like yeah I kicked their ass in this you know the whole weekend like I don't like I don't know how
I don't I really don't know how I'm gonna do it and my brother was like when you see that baby
come out it's just gonna happen you know you'll you know your life's gonna change and i'm like i mean like i a lot of my friends that
have families i'm like how do you manage to get like i can barely manage to get a meal in people
are asking me hey what time of day do you work out and i just kind of ignore the question now
so i'm like what kind of question is this like i try to just walk if i can just walk from my gym
in the car like that is part of my workout now because it's
it's i guess like vest on throw a 200 pound weight vest on and do 64 output output output uh we have like a 35 pound sandbag and i'll just go on the um the air runner and just walk with it on my
shoulder and like coach and like i'll just like pop it over the other side and just like kind of
walk i may get like i don't know three or four minutes and i'm like all right i'm done with that hey but matt
you're already there what i'm saying is is so you're there but but it's that's what i meant
sorry i didn't mean like to have kids i meant that's how you feel about your athletes already
you're already there it's just with your athletes i think that's i mean no shrink but i think that's
healthy is there stuff like in your life that you wish you could, like, do you have a lawn?
Current? No, no.
So do you? Yeah, perfect.
So if you had a lawn, you'd have to worry about mowing it or like talking to a gardener.
Fuck that.
I have a dog.
I have a dog.
I think that's kind of like what you're describing.
I actually sometimes
sometimes i see my dog i don't even know if this is right like when i when i first got my dog made
puppy i thought for sure i was like i had to give it i was going to give it away i'm like this is
too much like there's not i'm not in control of what my dog's doing like if i got to be somewhere
in 15 minutes and i got to walk i'm gonna give my dog 10 minutes of a walk. She might take 15 minutes to walk. You know,
it might take her longer. Like she's just distracted by all these things. And I'm over
here stressing out. I'm like, please just go to the bathroom. I have so many things I need to be
doing. Like, it's like, I don't know if that helps like answer the question a little bit better, but
what you're describing, I think I'm kind of there naturally already.
I'm looking at the inverse of it.
It's like, how do I get out of this feeling of just constantly thinking that I need to keep going and going and going?
It's like I work off of my iPad that I'm talking on right now.
It's like I'm not responsible besides when I'm coaching in that gym for the athletes during that time.
The other stuff is like just get my work done.
And I don't know.
I just feel like it's like just a constant state of work.
Yeah.
Which is not, it's not bad.
Like I would pick this over selling payroll.
And that's what I did for like two years out of college.
I absolutely hated it.
You know? What is that? What is selling payroll what is that uh so the payroll company the companies that uh you get paid from so uh adp
paychecks um you know i worked for that company so basically i would go up to small businesses
and talk to them about uh taxes about business payroll taxes and be like what like they'd be so lost it's like the taxes
is already confusing as it is for business let alone small business medium-sized business
corporation that all would never do that again ever would i would i would easily feel like i'm
working all the time because this work is fine like this is look i'm wearing a fucking chicken on my shirt on my shirt you know what i mean i think that's a cock i think that's a cock it's oh you're right
it is chicken all right um okay uh ladies and gentlemen attempt number two attempt number two
um when it's feeding time do you uh do you can you feed yours and Danielle Brandon's dog at the same time, or do they have to be separated?
Well, my dog eats three times a day.
My dog also lives with feet.
So where I live right now, you're not allowed to have dogs.
But when I got displaced from Ian, it was impossible to find a place around here because everyone was looking for places.
And so I just had to find something.
And so anyway, they eat at two different times because they live in two different areas.
I got a Great Dane when I had this one girlfriend.
Then I got another girlfriend.
I got another Great Dane.
Then I got another girlfriend. I got another Great Dane got another girlfriend i got another great dane so now i got three great danes right
and the girlfriends are like coming to the house now at different times to walk the danes and like
meeting up and talking and like i pull up to my house and all three are there fucking walking my
dogs and stress man it's like i don't share i kind of enjoyed it though i kind of enjoyed the
tension so would you when you pull i enjoy discomfort i enjoy discomfort yeah i like
this is fun like oh man i i agree with you more i could not agree with you more i love awkwardness
oh what's going on, Tim?
You know what I think about is like, right,
so you have an argument with one girlfriend that's bringing up your ex-girlfriend,
and the ex-girlfriend's at the house.
You're like, hey, fill her in about that argument that we were having earlier today.
She was a bitch, and you were a miss.
And then you just take a couple, like, you're just like putting fuel on the fire.
All right, so.
Yes.
All right, so I have a tendency to do that because I just like to have fun with it.
My dad is a real strong conservative.
My sister is more liberal.
We're sitting at a, we're having things.
Can you give me a quick example?
Can you please give me a quick example of what, like, what would that mean?
Like, your sister's more liberal and your dad's more conservative.
What's that look like?
A manifestation of that, a thought process yeah there's so there's
like there's three things that my dad will like kind of hang on to when it comes to
conservative it's like usually it has something to do with like um like
man how do i paint how do i paint this picture uh i guess this this argument was more about a trump sign that was
up in someone's yard uh or not a trump sign it was uh not a blm sign that was actually up in
someone's yard all right so this is this will kind of describe what you're asking for um they live in
a gated community you're not allowed to have any signs anywhere. It doesn't matter. BLM, Trump, it doesn't matter. You can't have either signs on them. This person had a BLM sign up
and it was this big ordeal. The person ended up selling their house and leaving.
I've heard about it, right? My dad's coming in from work. It's Thanksgiving. And I'm just like
sitting down at the counter and my sister's in there as well. I knew what I was getting myself
into. It's whatever i just i
wanted to have a little fun with it my dad's walking across i'm like hey whatever i've had
whatever happened to that one guy with that sign like shower right he's showering like 30 minutes
later comes out pours himself a glass of water like it's still in his head it's still living in his head and he just goes off
right and all i knew the moment he started talking about it like my sister's there you know it's
i just wanted to have fun i didn't realize that 20 30 minutes later that i had ruined thanksgiving
you know people are screaming at one another uh people are leaving and i'm i'm sitting there i'm
sitting there like this with my glass of wine and i'm just having thanksgiving dinner with my mother
now you know so it's you know i i like i agree with you i love awkwardness as well like it brings
so much joy and happiness to my heart.
Just seeing how people would do it.
It's a free drug. It's a free drug.
It's a free drug.
Yeah. I agree.
It makes me so happy.
Jeffrey Birchfield, he was about to settle on okay okay settle down
if i want to if i want to get beat up i'll go to the youtube comments everyone's settled now
um how old your sister 36 do is it do her and your dad ever have good talks
do is it do her and your dad ever have good talks yeah yeah they've put their guards down now you know it's it's difficult it's difficult for anyone
to listen to someone else and try to see through their eyes i get it it's not it's something that
you need to practice over and over and over like what is the point of an argument to make the other
people to make the other person feel shitty you know if you're not if you're not standing and having a political argument where you have to stake your point to
you know to get people to uh back you you know to say ha you know what's the point of a fucking
argument it you win and you make the other person feel like i'm thinking about relationship you win
you make the other person feel shitty or you lose you feel. You win, you make the other person feel shitty. Or you lose, you feel shitty. It's like, it's a lose-lose at all times.
Now, when I'm saying this, I'm not saying this in a way like I'm the best at arguing.
I just have the realistic expectation that I'm having this argument right now. I'm like, man,
this is not going to go well. I either to like put my dick between my legs and you know
take it or i have to stand up for what i feel is right and people are mad for longer than they need
to be the the affirmative action one's a trippy one so they just made affirmative action um illegal
and affirmative action is is letting people into colleges based on their skin color, right?
So it's basically they got rid of a component of religion.
And if you read about it, people are like, hey, this is a huge blow to black people.
Yeah.
And it's like I just wish two civil people could sit down and discuss it because I think both sides agree.
You don't want to be –
You know what they should do?
You don't want to be –
You know what they should do?
Go ahead. What?
Whatever applications you got to send in, let the computer read it.
Don't even put it in the hands of a person and just be like, these are the things I'm –
they're
gonna have they're gonna have some sort of ai capable of doing this and it's like it compares
it to applications it's like this is the better one now if we take it out of the hands of people
whoever gets in gets in who cares you know what i mean like people the air of people is you know their own natural bias um and then they get
convinced by someone else and then they see someone something that's someone else something
that inspired them of another politician another whatever x y business man or woman in the past
and it's like this is how they are today. Right or wrong.
I don't think that's the case of it,
but rather like air.
It's just natural human air.
I could believe that whomever this politician is,
is saying everything that I think is correct and right.
But I have to give them the same sort of weight if they do and say things that are wrong.
I'm not going to just like be okay with them doing the things that's wrong or saying the things I don't believe in.
But then also back them on everything that I do believe.
I have to be able to make that difference.
It's like, okay, I'm not going to ignore that side of it.
But it's natural.
It's just air by humans.
but it's natural it's just air by humans like the guy there was a i saw recently uh i don't remember the exact exact details but it was a politician on the east coast somewhere
and he saw a bumper sticker on it was like a center or something he saw a bumper sticker on
someone's car that said go trump so he took a key and keyed the person's car
like a senator and they got him doing it
yeah he just had him he had an emotional response the thing is is no one wants any poor the where
i was going to is no one wants any like poor kid who's capable somewhere falling through the cracks
but we also don't want a country with racist policy and so it's like can't the two teams
just come together and like figure out a way that we can do that without it like being like oh that guy gets in because he's uh chinese that guy
doesn't that guy the the real problem is i don't care about people getting into college because
they're black it's the or or whatever the problem is is that i don't like the thought of someone not
getting in because that person took their spot right so four chinese kids one korean kid one
cuban kid don't get in because because they happen to be born so four chinese kids one korean kid one cuban kid
don't get in because because they happen to be born the wrong color that's the part where it
gets kind of weird you're just like fuck but what about those guys yeah i did i i feel that i really
did i'm gonna do what i you know what i tell myself i go man i'm glad i don't have a kid right now and whatever whenever time my kid does
come to be in 18 years after that i'm like i better start getting my politicians in place
when that actually matters to my kid and i think like maybe that's a little self-centered because
like you know no that's the way i'd be if i didn't have kids either. I'd be that way too. I wouldn't give a shit.
As soon as I owned a business, I cared about who was our governor of Florida.
All of a sudden taxes matter to you, right?
Yeah.
Before that, I was like, my mom would be like, when I was in college, she'd be like, here,
I filled out this ballot for you.
You just put in these answers.
When you go in, I'm like, what do I care about?
And she'd be like, they want to take dad's money i'm like but what about my money like my money i'm like i don't even have money
i like i'm like i don't even know i could care less i feel like i'm just getting pressured now
to vote i'm in college i'm like i'm i'm more stressed out about am i gonna have 15 dollars
to go get a dollar beer on Thursday in my bank account?
That's what's stressing me out right now.
Not this.
And that, I don't know, maybe that's just, think about it now.
That's fairly inconsiderate of my responsibility as an American, right?
To just be like, la-di-da, you know?
But, you know, my only responsibility at the time was to show up to class
and then show up to football practice.
Those were the two things.
What, like, for the following, for those four years, you know?
But whatever.
You think that there's a games champion in your um in in the stable now yeah
yeah me too yeah and i'm really confident about the way uh the way training has been going as well
what what do you um what does that look like when you say you're confident
what are you seeing that makes you confident uh so the the weak
areas that i knew needed to be uh strengthened uh in order for uh i'll just say like danielle
um to be standing on that number one spot i can confidently say that we are seeing those weak areas improve.
Now, without even knowing what workouts are going to show up and how they're going to be done,
I just base her on who she was last year as an athlete.
She's stronger.
She's more aerobic on a bike.
She's not broken in half.
We're not dealing with injuries. I hate a girl who not broken in half like we're not dealing with injuries i hate a girl who's
broken in half but look these are these are all things that needed to be fixed and i couldn't
fix them last year with only three and a half weeks of you know working together um but yeah
i think i think there's a very strong chance for her to be standing on that podium, on top of the podium this year.
Is Emma Carey – is where she can go unforeseeable? Is she that good?
Is it like – is there stuff that we're going to see out of her in the next five years that's like, oh, shit?
Like, no, we knew she was good, but like –
Yeah. years that's like oh shit like no no like we knew she was good but like yeah she is there a little bit of an enigma to her it feels like it from looking from the outside that there's like oh
shit this thing has maybe some potential that we don't even know 100 percent um yeah she she has
no ceiling uh because there's so much more growth left out of her when it comes to things that she
struggled with and look a lot
of the teenage athletes struggle with the same thing not mentally right physically the part i'm
talking about um all they want to do is go in the pain cave all they want to do is lift heavy all
the time so they develop as that athlete and they do very well in the open they do very well at
quarters they do good at semis and then they get destroyed at the games because it's not about who can endure the most amount of pain.
It's not about who can lift the heaviest things. It's it's,
there's high skills involved. There's,
there's elements that take you outside of the gym that force you to do things
you've never done before.
It's like you cannot be in the pain cave for a 35 minute workout to the
Capitol. You know what I mean? You ain't lifting that, It's like you cannot be in the pain cave for a 35-minute workout to the capital.
You know what I mean?
You ain't lifting that bag up those steps if you think that pain tolerance is what got you there.
Unfortunately, it takes aerobic running.
And guess what?
You have to run slow in order to be aerobic. You can't just like will yourself to run.
You're just gonna stop um so anyway you know it's the good thing about emma is uh uh she's she's coachable
she really does truly try her best uh to do what i'm asking her to do. Um, you know, and she's like, she's a fat athlete. It's like,
uh, I don't have to tell her, uh, go, I have to be like, well, like, let's hold it back a little
bit. You know, I think, you know, you get like a drone for Christmas and, um, and you want to go
out and buy like three extra batteries for it right away. And that's kind of stupid because
really there's this thing, you fly the drone for 30 minutes and it's good to take a break right if you have three batteries you'll
fly for an hour and a half and you'll crash it because you start just making stupid fucking
mistakes you start doing you get too comfortable with flying the drone right when you first it's
an 1800 piece of camera equipment you've now dumped it in the fucking you've hit a telephone
pole with it i guess it's kind of like that with young athletes right the mouths the haley's that you're just basically describing the emma just or any any
not even at any new crossfitter you're like you want to know you just want to keep going because
you can't even believe the shit you're doing yeah you want to know who the biggest problem is
for these crossfitters that are mentally struggling. Rich Roni.
Well, yes.
The parents and the coaches.
I am equally to blame for bringing Emma out of her social environment and bringing her down to Naples,
where the only people she knows are the people inside of her camp.
Now, she has done an amazing job with listening to me when I say, go do something, like, do not be in the gym. Like, I don't need
you in here another second longer. You know, she's, the girl's going to, to Europe and traveling
Europe after the games. Like, that's amazing. You know, she's not worried about when can I be back in the, well, she is, but I'm not letting her be back in the gym anytime soon.
You know, when we're running our brute camps, she's got opportunities to come visit new countries with us and just see what life is like outside of our four walls of Naples.
You know, so, like, she told me a funny story.
She said at the CrossFit Games, I was a 14, 15-year-old.
There was 10 girls that I made to the CrossFit Games.
Emma Lawson was in that group as well.
Olivia Solik, I believe, was in that group as well.
Of the 10, eight of the girls, their parents homeschooled them in order to focus on CrossFit.
Two of them went to public school, Emma and some other girls, right?
So, okay, so they're about to do, this is funny.
So they're about to do this ruck run of some sort.
And Emma's like, this one girl's freaking out.
You know, the other girl that went to public school,
it just so happened that the girl freaking out went to public school.
So the girl's freaking out.
And, you know, little Emma at the time is like, hey, look, it's okay.
Just think about it this way.
We're the only two that have to wear backpacks all the time.
And now we get to run with our backpacks.
It's like these other girls, they don't even have backpacks.
There's no reason.
And so I was like, that's what comforted her
was the fact that they get to wear their backpacks.
Now they have to go run, you know, this extended amount of time.
But the point is this.
It's like, are you serious you serious parents you're really taking your
kids out of this like social growth to force them into work and it's like and now here i don't know
like uh tell me if i'm wrong i think crossfit needs to do away with all age groups at the games
get rid of it all like people are there the audience is there the money is there
to watch the professional athletes it's like i and of all age groups like do them like do them
in a different event like do the master have the masters have their own event their own thing and
not only that but i don't know just do an online competition, call it, you know, a CrossFit Games online version where it stops at semifinals for them.
Right. And then let the masters go somewhere else and do it.
Yeah. Yeah. It's like, you know, if you want to continue to bring money into the sport, stop wasting money.
And, you know, I'm not I'm not saying forget about these people like they deserve.
They deserve to figure out who's the fittest, just like anyone else does.
But in the realm of business and professional sport, if they can make it individually, they've earned their right to be there.
more uh you know amateur events corn fairy on the pga tour that they can like like i'm trying to draw a parallel here where um there's other routes for them to figure out you know am i the fittest
teenager in the world am i the fittest 35 year old in the save um you know get these athletes paid more when like they
only have like three or four events a year to earn uh from from their sport right you know not
counting their uh their sponsorship money but get these athletes paid more and i feel like that is such a simple
solution to do my only thought about doing the master some other time is that the fact that it
would be that many less people in attendance at the games i mean basically no one goes to the
the games is a complete sellout fucking pack but no one goes to the games except crossfitters right
i mean and so so you you and the masters have more money than these these fucking individual
ding-dongs right these uh fucking these people who are fighting these semi-final athletes are
all fucking broke right like every sport by the way every fucking fighter in the ufc is broke
except for the top one percent i didn't mean it's i'm not blaming crossfit at all but that but i
don't have an issue with the masters event being a totally separate event matter of fact it might even glorify them more might even give us time to give them more attention
like do it at a fucking completely fucking different time i'm i'm so open to that and the
kids thing i'm not sure i do want to say this about homeschool though i can't leave that alone
i i i don't think you should send your kids to school in this day and age me personally
but i don't but to pull your kids out of school just to focus on becoming the
next um tiger woods i think is crazy it's uh yeah it's it's you're the chances are you're
going to wound your kid but if you're going to do it the way i do where we just go to the mall
and hang out and check chicks out homeschool away yes yeah yeah look and i i'm and i'm yeah
to the bite off of what you're saying,
it's like I understand I just put like a blanket over all of it.
But, yeah, you hit it right on the head of what you said.
It's like if you're only doing this because you want to put more attention
and focus on this, that ain't it.
Do you have any Masters athletes, Torres?
No.
No, not anymore.
You close-minded asshole i really am
that's why he says that me too i i man i don't have any master's athletes either
i do like do you have any do you have any um adaptive athletes
no no no yeah are you tripping on how many good athletes you have?
Do you ever trip on that?
Holy fuck, we got a lot of good athletes.
That was my goal, man.
I told Mike that.
So Mike and I took over Brood this year.
And he had to do a lot of convincing of me.
Because I said, look, as long as I can put my attention on my athletes and allow me just to be coached still, I will do this.
If I can't do that, I will not do this.
I have no problem finding a different route for business, but that's my number one priority, man.
it's like that's my number one priority man it's like these five guys i mean these guys and girls it's like um i knew it was not going to be easy to do five for five um but i knew that it was
possible uh and i'm you know i'm really proud of them so far now it's like the next step of
you know like the last of the leg the next step and then you know now they have confidence
like they have the ability to do it uh thanks for coming on uh i've never met dom or dc but
uh please tell him i said hi uh people on this podcast are huge fans of the stable of athletes
that you you guys have i mean we love those guys fee dallin uh sprague emma uh miss brandon people are stoked
nate so uh thanks for uh thanks thanks for what you do it's cool you give the rest of us a fun
team to look at you're really awesome dude man thanks for coming in here on fire today too you
made this easy i appreciate it man thanks for having me on here for sure all right i'll talk to you soon all right see you ciao dude i don't want to say that the last time he was on it was great it was great too but he was
much more stoic wow damn he came in on fire he was more jr last time this time he was more taylor
man he was on fire uh did we determine if he was more Taylor. Man, he was on fire.
Did we determine if he was dating Danielle?
No.
I came in way too hot with Danielle last time.
I wasn't going to fuck it up with Matt this time.
That's for sure.
No fucking way.
I tried to slip in like do your dogs fight?
You see that?
You see that?
Like when they eat?
And then what else?
I asked one other question. Oh, you ever dated a girl who's fitter than you?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Definitely, right?
He gives off, oh, fuckboy energy.
Oh, he gives off the biggest fuckboy energy.
Oh, like he's sexy?
Is that what, is fuckboy energy sexy?
I just think he seems, like, cool.
Like, he's one of those dudes that doesn't smoke weed,
but is, like, cool like he does. He's one of those dudes that doesn't smoke weed but is cool like he does.
Where's Colton? Mr. Mertens.
Hey, did you guys see what happened yesterday?
What the US Supreme Court did?
The US Supreme Court did. Federal judge blocks government agencies from communications with social media companies and indicates evidence shows censorship in favor of Biden's policies.
You can't do that. The US – that's why I got kicked off of – I wonder if YouTube – I wonder if it's done with WHO and YouTube. Is YouTube considered social media?
So basically right now on YouTube, you can't say anything that goes against WHO policies or that even questions it.
So I couldn't say, and I'm not saying that the cure for some sort of – I couldn't say – let's say I have just some random sickness.
Let's make up a sickness. Let's call it the pencil sharpener sickness. Let's say the WHO said that you had
to take this medicine to cure the pencil sharpener sickness. But if I said, all you have to do is
eat healthy and exercise, I can get booted off. I was booted off.
And it looks like the Supreme Court says they can't do that.
It's awesome.
So awesome.
I'm so happy.
I can say whatever I want about Colton now
and not worry about getting booted off.
Damn.
Look at all this sponsorship and shit.
What's up, dude?
Product placement.
I love it. How's it going? Hey um i don't want to screw you up is there and it's not a big deal if you can't could you turn your camera sideways or no if not if it's
gonna screw up the balance and everything don't even worry about it because then you fill up the
um the whole the whole screen oh shit it might be locked maybe you can't oh there we go yeah yeah dang how closer do you to your router
our connection's so bad i don't have a wi-fi is it oh that's that's cell service we'll figure it out
yeah um hold on i just need to read this because someone paid me give me one second uh logan mars
uh holding up the roman candle you have an infinitely greater impact on the future raising
kids well right now than going door to door for the gop or the dnc politics be damned i agree
raise your kids and you'll have a better impact on um on the world um one more tyler spildy after
being in commons jail for three months i can honestly say that I'm a changed man and that the 49ers suck. Wait, why were you in comments jail? We put you in that? We don't do that on the show, do we?
Although I don't have a high tolerance of negative talk about my homeboy Greg, by the way. I've now deleted two comments on YouTube. If he starts saying dumb shit in there about him, I will erase it.
Hey, can you hear me?
Yeah.
Oh, no.
Our connection is so fucked, Colton.
No, barely.
There's too much of a delay.
There's a crazy delay.
I wonder if I can move to a different spot.
How many bars do you have?
I always have one bar.
Dude, there's someone in there with you.
Are you armed?
I saw someone standing behind you for a second.
God, that's a nice room.
That's your gym?
Yeah.
It's not done yet, but, yeah, like, there's the back door,
and we got a lot of plywood up, lifting platform, cardio machines.
That's where the rig is going to go.
Hey, Colton how how close is um where's the is there a door from that room into your house
yeah or is that standalone
no so it goes it's like here's a gym garage door it's about to get really echoey over here
but here's like a utility room and then that's the house oh that is awesome dude wow
wow
yeah you're becoming you're like a real adult. I've been taped right now.
Yeah, sort of.
There's all cabinets and everything.
This is crazy.
Is that connected right now at all?
How has all of this changed?
So these are just for three things.
Has all of this changed?
So these are just for three things.
Moving with your girlfriend, building a new house, starting a new business, the dog business, everything cool?
You were already kind of maxed out, weren't you?
Yeah, I've been – yeah, I've kind of taken a little bit of a step back at the farm. Because of income from a few sponsors and the weiner dog business and just some investments
that we've made.
I don't have to farm as much so I've just been spending that time taking care of the
dogs and then building the house which is something something that I mean, I have to get done right now so that we can have a place to live and get a better place to train
besides the garage. So I think it's worth spending the extra time right now to get the garage gym
done. So that I mean, that's really going to elevate our training a ton. We don't have to
do rope climbs and trees, bring muscles and trees want to go outside when it's cold or raining to do our training.
We have plenty of space.
We have level fours to lift on.
So, I mean, it's a big, like, drain on my time.
So, I mean, there's been definitely less time for recovery work,
but the training has been enhanced already for sure,
and it'll be way, way better once we get it done.
What's your girlfriend's name again, Colton?
Allison. way way better once we get it done what's your girlfriend's name again colton allison did and allison made it to the games too on a team the crossfit gym in town yeah second year in a row team crossfit kilo two out of iowa city they're about one hour crazy Hey What
You didn't
Was it Waterpalooza?
One of the events you didn't go to because you got sick
And it seemed like it was serious
And I never heard the story behind that
Can you tell us what happened?
Yeah
It can be a little bit of a long story
But yeah it was Waterpalooza
This past January
I was prepping Getting ready to go in training camp.
Things were going really, really well.
I was really excited.
I was expecting to have a pretty good finish there.
And it was maybe less than two weeks out when I started to have some health problems.
It started off me just thinking that maybe had like a little bit of frostbite
in my eyes maybe because um we're going through kind of a cold spell here and it was it'd get
down to like a 20 below zero with the wind chill and I had about an hour for the running intervals
to do and I had to do them outside obviously and it was um it was night because it was just a lot
of time at the farm that day so it was a little bit colder because of that and I was night because it was just a lot of time at the farm that day, so it was a little bit colder because of that.
And so I was outside for about an hour running,
and I remember the next day I just hurt until I could move my eyes,
just like look in a different direction.
My eyes hurt. I had a bit of a headache.
And I said, okay, I guess maybe my eyes got a little bit cold.
And I'm like, okay, this will get better in a few days.
The next day it's worse um more eye pain and i have a migraine it's getting more severe and it's pretty constant
it's like okay i guess i'll take a few days to get better and then next day comes around
it's even worse and it's starting to make it really difficult to get things done at the farm. Training is really difficult to get done.
So I'm like, okay, I'll just take a few days easy,
and then I'll hit it hard for the last week, and I'll be ready for Wadapuza.
Colton, were you getting scared at all?
It was worse.
Were you getting scared at all for your safety?
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I'm just more really annoyed because I was really looking forward to Wadapuza.
I hadn't competed in person at that time since the games.
I missed out on Rogue because I had an error in one of my videos for the qualifier.
So I hadn't competed in person in a long time,
and I'm somebody who likes to compete often.
And so, yeah, it was more just annoying, but I never thought, like,
okay, this is going to keep me from water polo.
I was just thinking, like, okay, take a few days, easy,
get my work done at the farm, light training session, and then recover,
and this will go this
will go away but um each day it keeps getting worse and you know the headaches start getting
worse and they're not a constant at this point the eye pain is getting worse and then you know
starting to really affect my training i'm getting like a lot of just overall fatigue like just
getting out of bed and getting dressed was
exhausting at that point and I remember one time specifically I was on the echo bike doing some
intervals and it's holding like mid to low 50 rpms I was just exhausted I was like what in the
hell is going on like why am I so tired right now and just not being able to recover from anything.
I just kept thinking, like, okay, just take it easy for a few more days.
I can get a few hard training sessions in for what I'll lose.
My body will bounce back, and I'll have a good performance out there.
But as the days go on, it just keeps getting worse,
and I start having some pretty severe, like, brain fog. Like, my mind just isn't really functioning at a high level.
I started getting some slurred speech.
It's hard to make the words come out properly.
It's more fumbling than it is usual.
Dude, that's scary shit.
Who spotted that?
Who spotted that, the slurred speech. That's now you're getting into scary land.
Um, I mentioned it and, um, like I could just notice it too.
Like it was having a hard time.
Like I really had to focus to form a sentence and get the words to come out
properly. And then, um,
started having some vision loss in my right eye it was uh just a little bit at first
and as the days go on it starts getting more severe but um i just kind of keep plugging away
the farm i'm trying to just do the things that need to be got need to be done to get by and just
doing like light cardio on my training sessions and then basically spending the rest of the day
in bed with a light trimmed off just trying to like recover and get my body feeling good and it gets to the point
where I wake up one morning and I can't really see anything in my right eye and some pretty
severe vision loss in my left eye as well so at that point I'm like okay now I have to go to a
doctor um I really can't do anything else at this point it's kind
of it's hard to function with the headaches and the vision loss and everything so I'll call my
brother and he comes picks me up drives me to an eye doctor and I'm there for most of the morning
getting tests done they're taking images of my eyes uh things like that and so then I'm in the waiting room for a while, waiting for them to get back with the results.
And the doctor comes in and she says, here's a folder.
Here's all your test results, all your images.
And you take this.
And you need to go to the emergency room at the University of Maryland today.
She said, take this.
All their eye doctors are booked right now. You need to be seen today. So go to the emergency room and they'll see you and get in this packet when you get there.
So my brother takes me to the emergency room. We wait in the lobby for probably three hours before we get seen.
I go give them my packet and I wait in the doctor's room for another hour. I have another student residence coming in looking at my test results, things like that.
I'm not really getting much information.
And it starts getting pretty late in the day.
And eventually a doctor from neurology comes in.
a doctor from neurology comes in and she says saying that she thinks I have a rare autoimmune disease called MOG antibody disease and she wants me to be admitted to the hospital
they want to do a whole bunch of tests and get me started on treatment
and this is before they even know for sure if I have it or not, but they had
a pretty good hunch, and this is what I had based on my symptoms and kind of how it occurred.
And I was pretty pissed off at that point because I was expecting – just like started
with the eye pain and then vision loss and then the brain fog and trouble with but i mean but i mean how did you get it how
did you why is it manifesting now colton at um how old are you you're 25
yeah so they don't know why um they don't know what triggers it and i had a similar thing when I was maybe 12 or just getting tests done and at that time they
didn't they weren't able to test for this disease so they didn't know what it was they just kind of
chalked it up like this is just a random response and he put me on prednisone for a few days and
then I was on oral prednisone for a few months after that and it got better um but then this time around
symptoms were more severe and um the doctors they don't know why it happens they can't have
any way to predict when it will happen again and um anything like that so just
he said there's a lot of things that could trigger but there's really no way to know
um what exactly it would be.
I asked him if it was anything to do with being out in the cold for so long.
He didn't think that was it.
So, yeah, they're not really sure why it happens or when it will happen again.
Yeah, at that point, they wanted me to be admitted into the hospital.
And it took them a while to convince me of that because I just wanted, wanted like just give me some prednisone or something to get the inflammation down
because i still wanted to go compete at flu i'm gonna stay in the hospital i ended up um
staying in the hospital for about a week uh getting tests holy shit and um the first couple
nights they had me in a kid's room because there was no adult rooms available.
So they were just like packed with people there.
Way just like over occupied.
And then they'd be like, there are people in bed just like in the hallway because they didn't have rooms for them.
For the first couple of days. And the first night i was sleeping there um didn't really
get much sleep because my they had me hooked up to i don't know heart rate sensors or all this stuff
those little sticky pads put on your skin and your chest everywhere and i'm hooked up to monitors and
ivy and things and like every time I kind of relax
and get ready to fall asleep,
the monitor starts beeping and it goes off.
And this happens like every five to 10 minutes
until eventually, you know, the doctor turned it off.
It was the heart rate monitor.
My heart rate is dropping into like the mid and upper 20s.
So it stopped their alarm.
So they think I have some like something
wrong my heartbeat um but eventually they just they ask me they go do you run a lot
I'm like uh like yeah I kind of do a lot of fitness stuff um so that's probably why my
heart rate was so low so eventually they turn it off and then I woke up that morning and the nurse comes in to get me and they bring in a wheelchair
and she takes me off. She was like what are we doing where am I going and she didn't really tell
me much I don't know why I just went and we did basically a bunch of different eye tests and eye
imaging for about four hours and they took me back to my room.
And at this point, it's been about two days since I've eaten or drank anything.
And they won't let me eat at the hospital because they don't know what tests they're
going to run me through and some of them you have to be fasted for.
And I wasn't really eating much leading up to that just from being too sick to kind of
keep anything down.
and I wasn't really eating much leading up to that just from being too sick to kind of keep eating down but by the time I got home I had lost about 20 pounds and it was all said and done
I think um I was actually thinking about this uh on your podcast it was a little while ago
you said you weighed 176 and I was I was lighter than you when I left the hospital wow uh just really quick here uh savon's dog uh uh how did it occur he just
said how it occurred savvy man no he didn't say how it occurred he was telling us the uh manifestation
how the manifestations of the sickness we still don't know how it occurred but thank you dog i
appreciate you i understand how dogs think it's's a little different than humans of my caliber and depth and understanding of how the world works.
I'm reading here and it says basically exactly what you said.
It's an inflammation. It doesn't sound like they know a lot about it, but it's an inflammation caused in the spinal cord and brain and in the optic nerve.
So Colton, I assume you never got the vaccine for the for the other thing for the 49er
stuff no um no that's good yeah so you could rule that out and then um uh how rare how rare is this
thing like do you know and isn't isn't there you know like all these doctors are like hey just eat
meat and all that shit goes away or isn't there some like doctors like some like paul saladino can talk to you and be like
hey just eat this and this and this have you talked to paul maybe i should put you in touch with paul
i've actually thought about that i wondered if it had something to do with my diet just um
because with my to consume a lot of carbs um so I don't know if it's really feasible for me to do something like a carnivore diet or a very low-carb diet, just with all the training we have to do.
But I have thought about that because I've heard other circumstances where people have gone to a carnivore diet or similar diets.
And a lot of their autoimmune issues have cleared up.
I'm not sure if that's relevant to this, but it might be.
I could change my diet just with training if i could make that work
what did they give you medication is that is that the deal
yeah so you're on some sort it's prednisone through an iv
iv for the first three days and then you take it orally for about three months after
that. I think it started off at 60 milligrams a day and then every two weeks it goes down by
10 milligrams until you're done. So I finished that I guess it would have been maybe March
sometime in March and basically that just helps reduce all the inflammation in your body.
And then you're kind of good to go until it happens again pretty much.
And so, yeah, they don't know a ton about it.
It's like when I went there when I was a kid,
they didn't even know it was a thing.
They weren't able to test for it.
So I know it affects your optic nerves, brain, and your spine.
It's something to do with some kind of something that's around those areas of your body and your nervous system.
So you're not on medication now?
It kind of went away.
Nope.
No medication now.
There's treatments, but I think they're hardly effective. It's really not worth my time to go to the hospital every month and get a catheter put in and do the transfusions and things like that.
Honestly, now that I know what the signs and symptoms are and I can be wary of it, I'll just go and get the prednisone treatment when I need it
beginning out um while this is happening to you are you I assume there's at some point where you have to just kind of let waterpalooza go you're like fuck I need to survive were you ever scared
you were gonna die no I didn't think I was gonna die um I didn't know if I'd get my vision back or not
because there was permanent nerve damage in my optic nerve
in my right eye and a little bit in my left eye.
And there was some nerve damage in my spine,
and I don't think there was anything in my brain
that showed up in the scans.
But I remember I had to do a spinal tap.
So I had to take fluid from my spine and test it.
They had to take this big needle and stick it in your back.
And it's like a certain place in between some of the vertebrae in your lower
spine where they can access it.
And the first time they tried to do it,
I was still in the kid's room and they just,
they just come in with their tray and their needles and you lay on your side and you kind of get in the fetal position, pull your knees up to your chest and tuck your head.
That's supposed to kind of like push your spine out so they can see your vertebrae and get the needle in there and access it.
When they go before they started, they said, sometimes we have trouble getting in the right spot.
So we'll try two or three times based on how the pain is.
And if it doesn't work, we'll go to radiology and they'll take images and then they'll get it in the exact spot.
So they try a few times.
They can't find it.
And I try a few more.
Can't find it. They said I had too much muscle in my lower back.
It was making it difficult for them to get in the right spot,
and they said my skin was,
they're having trouble getting the needle through it,
and they end up trying.
I think after the sixth or seventh time,
they broke the needle,
so they went and got another needle
and tried another three or four times so i
think we had like 10 attempts before they gave up on it they ended up going to radiology and getting
it done but this is like some wolverine shit
i guess so it's like they kept on being like oh it's almost got it almost got it i'm like i don't
know if you do because you you are poking everywhere and not finding it.
But I ended up having some inflammation in my spine.
And I don't know if, like, the first several days after I left the hospital,
I remember I had this feeling from, like, the time I came to the hospital to, you know,
about a week after where my whole body just kind of felt like I had a little bit of numbing agent in it.
It was just a little bit numb.
I don't know if that was something to do with the inflammation in my spine.
I think that's gone away, or I've just gotten used to it.
But that was kind of a really weird thing to feel.
Everything just was a little numb.
What do you mean?
Your touch scent, how you feel the
world like was numb like your your body yeah like everything um it's like if you were to
like itch your arm it just feels like it's a little bit numb like it's a little bit of sleep
and just kind of like that everywhere in my body like if you rub your eyes it kind of feels like
my eyes aren't there like i can't feel it in my eyes after being rubbed really man um god it's not
it all sounds so scary to me but but you weren't scared um i was worried i wasn't gonna be able to
compete this season or maybe at all um just depending on how bad the nerve damage was um but i just been i read a
lot of stoic text and i just kind of focused on like okay this is um it's outside of my control
um but i believe like i am very determined very stubborn and i'm pretty smart so whatever
challenges arise or problems come up i'll be able to figure it out and find a way forward
no matter what it is. And I'll set the deal with whatever things are outside of my control.
And once I got home and started, it was probably a couple of days before I started doing
some fitness, just started doing a little bit of light cardio on the echo bike and rower and
things like that. And just very slowly started to get back into it and I felt like my aerobic
fitness came back relatively quickly in my capacity but it was probably like semifinals
until I felt like my strength was all the way back like I was hitting numbers that I usually hit and
moving
I think you broke up pretty good. Can you hear me?
Yeah, I can hear you.
I just want to read this from one of the comments.
Do it, Colton.
I grew up on high doses of immunosuppressants due to an autoimmune diagnosis at three.
I cut them all out, cold turkey at age 27,
and healed through nutrition similar to what Paul S. teaches.
I just don't know if that's something I'm going to be able to do while competing.
And just doing the volume of training that I do,
I don't know if I can fuel my body for that with just proteins and fats and fruits.
I think I just have to get more carbohydrates in
to compete at this level for now.
But that's probably definitely a diet I'll be looking into
once I am done competing.
We'll see.
Jody Lynn, this conversation is refreshing.
Definitely not what we tuned in for.
Thank you very much, Colton, for being transparent and not vague uh mike mccaskey colton thanks for telling your story
what a crazy ride you had glad you recovered uh and stronger from the challenge are you stronger
from the challenge you think yeah i think it helped um with my mindset and just like letting
go of the shit that's not within your control and focusing on what is that really
just relieves like a big burden off your shoulders when you can really adopt that mindset and
because you waste a lot of energy worrying about things um and suffering the consequences of things
before they've ever even happened they might not ever even happen either so just putting that
energy into what you can control and adopt that into
competing and just focus now i just focus completely on day-to-day doing anything i need to do being as
prepared as i possibly can when i step on the floor and the cards will fall where they will i don't get
nearly as anxious or nervous and um i don't have nearly as much mental fatigue when I go compete anymore.
Oh, interesting.
How was semifinals?
How would you sum up semifinals, the experience?
I'm still just really frustrated with event number two,
frustrated that I got sick.
I did that event in training and I was able to watch week one
and set it up so that the spacing was the same, the transitions were the same.
And I got 64 reps going through it in training.
And it wasn't at like a super high intensity level.
It was like I kind of went at a pace.
It was hard, but I knew I had more in the tank.
And so to only get like 10 reps less than that in the actual event was very frustrating.
That was kind of the moment when I realized it was like –
You took second in that event.
Mm-hmm.
I should have won by a lot.
And so I'm not understanding.
Why do you think you did worse?
Why do you think you did worse at the event than in training?
I caught a cold while I was traveling,
so I think that took some energy out of me,
being a little bit sick while I was there.
It was at that time when I was trying to...
What do you mean you were sick when you were there?
Sorry, I'm just...
I'm sorry.
You were sick at the semifinals?
Yeah, I think I caught something while I was at, at the semifinals. Yeah.
I think I caught something while I was traveling.
Some kind of respiratory thing.
Had like sore throat,
stuffy nose,
congestion,
all that stuff.
And I hadn't been,
I usually get sick like relatively often.
I'll get a cold,
but I hadn't been sick for quite a long time.
And then I think just going through the airport and being exposed to all that new germs and everything like that got me sick.
You're kind of one-dimensional in your immune system.
You're just able to fight off pig shit, but human shit you're not so good at.
Yeah, I'm very rarely exposed to any new germs like that.
I go to the farm.
I train here.
The only time I really see other people is when I go to the farm I train here and I might the only time I really see other people is I go to the gas station a grocery store so I think um just being at the airport being
introduced to all those new uh germs got me sick and then I was kind of thinking like
going into the weekend I knew I was gonna have a have to have a pretty good performance to get in
um and I knew there's gonna be some really good athletes on the outside looking in at the end of the weekend
and um i was like i need to have a good performance and maximize each event
so getting second on event number two and not getting those 100 points i was like well i really
needed those points and i like underperformed on event one and if i didn't if i'm that much
slower here than i was in training,
then I started thinking, you know,
well, this rest this weekend is not going to go very good for me then.
And so then waking up the second day and getting warmed up,
my body was, you know, I was feeling sick.
I'm really tired.
I was not feeling like going out there and competing.
And I really wanted to just pull out and go home with my tail tucked between my legs and just be done with it.
You did.
What's that look like in your head?
You wanted to pull out, huh?
Yeah, because I didn't think that I had an opportunity to qualify at that point.
Looking at the rest of the events and thinking of what my performance would be based off of the first two events,
I didn't think I was competing at my capacity.
And I thought that anything less than 100% of my capabilities wasn't going to get the job done.
Colton, hold on a second. Sorry, hold on a second.
So you take a 36th and a 2nd.
You can't enjoy the 2nd because you wanted a 1st.
And that night, you think about going home?
Yeah, it was really the next morning I woke up because I was feeling a little more sick.
Like the first day, I definitely noticed congestion and things like that,
but I didn't know how much it was going to affect my energy and my performance.
And after the first event, I was like, okay, maybe it didn't affect me that much.
Maybe it's not that great at that event.
I can deal with that.
But then the second event, when i really underperformed is when i knew like okay yeah this is affecting me and
i'm just thinking about how that was going to work out for the rest of the events going forward
and just being um you know sick you know you don't feel good you don't want to do any of this stuff
and also mentally kind of believing you're not gonna go back to the games was just hard to deal with i
didn't just didn't want to do it do you talk about it i know i didn't talk to anybody about it you
keep it all in it's not like you don't wake up on on um in the morning and be like hey ali i want
to go home and she's like quit being a bitch or let talk to me about it you just keep it all in
it's all you just so you're just kind of watching the thoughts yeah i mean i feel like if i get to the point where i
would have went to alley and said like i think i'm gonna go home like the decision would have
already been made for me at that point and okay you're not going for counsel yeah thank you so
okay so so you wake up you want to go home i want to come back to that in a second and you end up
taking first you don't just take first you beat fucking the next closest guy by over a minute
that was uh linda yeah are are you are those doubts how long are those doubts about wanting
to go home stick in your brain so let let's say you're in the corral.
Tell me what's going on in your brain in the corral.
Is there still an option like, hey, I'm going home?
At that point, I had just come to terms,
and this weekend may not go how I want,
and it's going to be really shitty doing all these events while I'm sick.
But I'm just going to have to deal with it.
I'm going to go.
I'm going to do my best, and whatever happens, happens.
Did someone tell you that? Did your dad tell you that or your coach? No. I'm just going to have to deal with it. I'm going to go. I'm going to do my best. And whatever happens, happens.
Did someone tell you that?
Did your dad tell you that or your coach?
No.
No, just the conclusion I came to.
Wow. I was like, this isn't going to be fun, but I'm not going to pull out just because I'm not going to get what I want
and because it's going to be a little bit miserable.
Those aren't reasons to quit.
I'm going to see it through and whatever happens
happens so um at that point I actually kind of had pretty big relief it felt like the stress
was off me going into that third event I just decided my goal is no longer performance my goal
is just suffering I'm just going to go I'm going to set a pace that is hard and I'm just not going to relinquish it until the wheels fall off and um
my performance is not going to be measured by the leaderboard it's going to be measured by how much
I'm able to make myself suffer through this event and no it went well and um at that point I had no
more like um I wasn't contemplating pulling out anymore but um I immediately just started thinking about events four and five
because I was not sure how that was going to go with my strength
and then running on the true form.
But the stats went about what I thought it would be,
and the running actually went better than I thought.
So it was at that point where I was like, okay, now I have a real shot.
I know that I can do well in event six.
And event seven, I think I can do well in event six and event seven.
I think I can do good enough to get in.
First place in Linda, crazy.
A 275-pound snatch.
Let's talk about this last workout.
As I recall, this last workout, that was the assault bike, toes to bar then a run right uh sandbag carry sandbag carry
and it was three rounds yep and i think that the conventional wisdom was is that hey um uh the bike
is not his thing and the sandbag uh he's not gonna be able to get his arms around it he's fucked he's
toast that's this is worst case situation people were thinking you
were going to be you know a bottom 30 what was your thought going into that were you like yeah
i mean and by the way you absolutely destroyed it a tenth is crazy and it's not just a tenth you got
um the time the first place is 408 412 417 420 422 424 42525, 426, 426, 427.
And that's where you landed.
I mean, you were crazy competitive.
What was your thought going into that final event?
I mean, you had to take a 10th or better, basically.
I knew that worst-case scenario, I would need 12th place to get in
if the guys finally won.
So I was watching the first few heats and thinking about
times from the other semifinals and kind of thinking about where i needed to be
and um you know it was interesting before that event it was pretty um the consensus was it was
a big guy event after i do well um it's no longer the consensus which is interesting um you know
things are bad for short people unless i'm good at it's
no longer bad for short people it's not that i it's not that i overcame the weakness it just
it was it was never bad for short people in the first place wow okay yeah i see it every once in
a while um i think that's fair i think that i think you nailed it you're right that that that
needs to be thought of did he overcome it or meaning meaning maybe he still does suck at reaching around the
bag but somehow he overcame it with some sort of technique extra hand strength holding the bag
higher lower that there was something strategically you did that overcame it right and it is still bad
for short people yeah um i think it's like use that a bad workout for short people. How did the other short people do?
I have no idea.
I need someone else to answer that.
Not do good.
They didn't do good.
No.
Okay, good.
I liked, Oh, Oh, there was another short guy.
Uh, how did Tetlo doing that?
Um, he was pretty far down there.
That also might've been part of his strategy. Um um he was kind of going into it 46 46 i'm gonna
take a top three or bottom 20 was kind of his game plan going into it because he needed something
big to get back into qualification so he might be he probably could have been higher up there if he
paced it a little differently okay yeah he took 40 uh 46 okay sorry going back so did you
think you were gonna you you could get in that top 12 were you feeling confident going into it
or were you like oh i'm fucked yeah i mean it was um the movements um bike's not good for smaller
athletes sandbags not good for smaller athletes and we had uh three sets of 20 total bar which i knew i could do on broken and um i knew like um i was wishing there was more total bar because we could have
done 30 each round i still could have gone on broken but i don't know if anybody else could have
and so i feel like my strength on that workout was a little bit limited um but i knew i'd been
making a ton of progress on the bike and i knew I'd be able to push the sandbag hard enough,
and I'd actually be able to recover a little bit on the total bar,
catch my breath a little bit,
and have a quick transition to the sandbag and move it with intensity.
So I thought, you know, I'm not going to lose a lot of time on the sandbag.
I'm going to at least make up a little time
or at least not lose anything on the total bar.
They're going to have to go on broken to keep up with me and i felt like my progress on the bike put me in a spot where
i could hang with the bigger athletes and um you know going into workouts where it's like yeah i
shouldn't do well on this but that's okay because i think i'm just fitter than most everybody else
here so i think i'm still gonna beat, even if they have an advantage over me.
Like if a tall athlete beats me in like a muscle-up and burpee workout,
you're probably significantly fitter than me to beat me in that.
But then for me to beat, you know, anybody that I –
I don't know if I should say anybody,
because I think I beat Fikowski on that workout.
But if I just say anybody because I think I beat Fikowski on that workout but if I beat you you know you might have to accept that I'm better than you I'm just better than you and that's why
I beat you and and so when you cross the finish line how quickly do you know that you're going
to the games or do you are you not really even that confident until you hear them announce it? This was the first year where I wasn't waiting until the announcement
to be like, okay, I'm going.
The past two years, I knew it was going to be very close,
and I decided to wait until they said my name to know that I was going.
But this year, I knew in the second round, I was like,
wait, I'm doing good enough.
I'm going to make it.
I could kind of see the field. I could see that I was relatively in the middle of the pack. I'm doing good enough. I'm going to make it. I could kind of see the field.
I could see that I was relatively in the middle of the pack.
I was beating a few guys.
So I knew, I also knew the people that I had to beat were either right next to me or behind
me.
So I knew they weren't going to win the event.
So I didn't necessarily have to get a top 10 finish.
I can distinctly remember, especially the toe of the bar of our on the last round like this is it
i'm gonna do these unbroken i'm gonna pick up the bag across the finish line i'm going back to the
games and um i just remember that being it was like an unreal feeling knowing that i was going
to the games before the event was even over and that was a great experience not having to wait
and worry did you weep at all after that on the way home little
little tear the water came from the eyes tear ducts turn on no i was very happy um happier than
any of my other games qualifications because i how could you not cry isn't there kind of like
a release like oh my god no no tears felt really good because i mean there's several times in the
last few months where i had believed that my season was over.
I was in the hospital, and then even during the open, the morning that the open started, I had Brooks tending my elbow at the farm.
I was trying to catch a pig to put him in with the special—I call it the special needs pin.
It's basically all the pigs who are runts or they're sick or they're lame.
So they just need like extra attention and kind of be away from the herd.
Because always the bigger pigs will beat them up.
So I was trying to catch this pig.
And I reached down with my arm to grab him by his back leg.
And another pig comes from the side.
And my arm's kind of trapped there by this pig.
And he hits my elbow and pushes it to the
inside and it hyper extends um so that was the day the open started and i couldn't do a muscle up
that day so i couldn't get the get out of the dip so then i was like well i guess i just had to try
and rehab this and do good enough on monday to get a score to get through and then right after it's like my first hard session back at the
quarterfinals I was doing some back squats and I was on my last set I think it was 455 for doubles
or triples I distinctly remember thinking like okay my strength's back. I feel – this feels really strong. Like, this feels really light. And then my last rep, I get to the bottom, and I feel my back pop.
It's like these three big pops right at the bottom.
So I dropped the weight off my back.
I ended up herniating some discs in my back.
So then I'm like, well, shit, now I have seven weeks to get this better
and getting in shape for the semifinalsinals so that was a point too I was like
maybe this season's over now and again sick at semis and going through that whole thing and
just like having to battle through all those things and thinking that the season's over so
many times but then to finally make it back to the games like I told Allie I'm like did you like
can you believe I made it back again and she's like
yeah i always thought you would but i thought they would qualify but i thought i was going to
be at home after semifinals um do you think that your training is going to get smarter um as this
goes on it's crazy these two questions you think your training is going to get smarter not that
it's not smart i don't mean to insinuate that let me rephrase the question because it is um as you get older and you had those so you had the sickness you had the disc do you think that
other athletes are going through this too like all the all those guys who are going to the games
have all pushed themselves so hard that they saw at some point during the season they're like oh
shit i wonder if i fucked myself and then two are you gonna now that you're this is your third
crossfit games third individual fourth yeah crazy third individual do you think that um you you will
make any significant changes for next year uh yeah i hope to make some huge changes for next year um
i'm constantly evaluating my training and um i think that i had to train very differently
throughout my career so
far just because just doing labor at the farm all day before I get started on training I don't have
like a ton of time to warm up I don't have a ton of time for recovery and sleep
so those are a few things that not everybody else deals with and plays a huge role in how often you
get injured how badly you get injured and I can look back at all my injuries and see the path that I took to get to that injury.
And hopefully going forward, I won't have to be at the farm so much or maybe even not at all within the next year.
And I can just train and get all that recovery work in, get proper sleep, proper time to warm up
and cool down between workouts and things like that.
But also, like, doing big, like, zone two pieces or just, like, one-hour,
two-hour, three-hour workouts that I can do, like, on weekends on the farm.
It's hard for me to get those in all the time throughout the year
because I might only have two or three hours total to train.
So taking one hour to go do a zone two piece,
it's kind of hard to get that in and my lifts and do any Metcons.
So I've had to do things differently as far as getting my zone two work in,
getting my skills work in because that's also something that just takes a lot of time,
practicing your jump rope, your handstand skills, things like that.
But I think I have some good plans in place to get those things in, even if I do have to farm.
But hopefully I won't have to keep farming for a whole lot longer.
We'll see.
Meaning between sponsors, investments, and your new business that you're able to cover everything you need
and train more, focus more on your training,
focus more on your rest probably.
Yeah, exactly.
That's the biggest thing.
I get a lot of volume in.
I probably don't get as much volume in on zone two work
just because I don't have the time or school work.
But I get a lot of Metcons in and things like that.
But then it just eats away at my sleep and recovery work.
Alisa, are Colton and tetlo friends are you and
scott tetlo friends yeah we're friends we haven't ever trained together or anything but um yeah we
did fit wars against each other um we've talked on instagram here and there we talked when we're
at comps together do you guys text will you be like hey what do you ever do you ever talk to
each other just like because you guys have the same uh size you might be like hey what do you ever do you ever talk to each other just like because you guys have the same uh size you might be like hey what do you think about this hey have you any takes
five pulls to get to the top these other fuckers do it in three any thoughts on what we can do
about that you guys ever brainstorm no i don't i don't do that with anybody though okay um uh heidi
uh croom i love when colton talks confidently so hot all right fine how about me
uh uh clock uh how can you not cry sebon projecting again yeah fair enough what what else do i got
um uh like colton's pig sebon were you putting a special needs class so the bigger kids wouldn't
pick on you no i just blew the bigger kids and they
protected me okay fine now you know uh someone needs to do a behind the scenes at his farm it
would be a gem yeah that would be crazy we have a we have a video coming out um
with uh swolverine i'm not sure when it's gonna come out but they came over here a few days ago
yep we got some video came to the farm and checked out the home gym everything like that I'm not sure when it's going to come out, but they came over here a few days ago. Yep.
We got some video.
Came to the farm and checked out the home gym and everything like that.
I'm going to go.
What do you – how does the sponsor reach out to you?
These people just reached out to you?
These Wolverine people?
Yeah, they were my very first sponsor.
It was like a couple months before semifinals in 2021,
the first years I qualified.
And, yeah, I talked to Alex, who's one of the owners,
and just really liked what she had to say and seemed really professional.
I had gotten like some other companies.
Alex is a girl?
That's a girl, Alex?
Mm-hmm.
Yep.
Yeah, and there have been some other companies who like messaged me on Instagram.
But this kind of felt more like they were giving you an affiliate link and whatever, like one of those deals.
But Wolverine seemed like they're looking for more of a legitimate partnership
and like it was pretty professional.
Yeah, fuck that affiliate link shit.
When people approach me with that, I'm like, fuck off.
I don't want to.
No, I'm not doing that.
Yeah, that's why I ended up going with Wolverine
and I've been with them ever since.
But like now I work with Mind Over Matter Management.
We just started working together like less than a month ago probably.
That's Rashad and Ken.
Gabe from Paper Street knows them.
I don't know if you do.
Mind Over Matter, they're managers?
Yeah, so now they'll be reaching out to give me a possible,
like more sponsorships and negotiating contracts for me and things like that.
Do you take this, this pre-workout
you do take this does it make your skin crawl yeah yeah that's the stuff uh hiller always says
that you're i think he says your skin should crawl yeah i get a little bit tingly itchy kind of
that that citrulline is the um uh that's like
like the new better kind of arginine right that your body just can decide do you know about all
this stuff do you study all this shit yeah it's good for um it's like beta alanine okay do you
think about like this like um you're short like power output strength kind of stuff is going to
be fueled by supplements like creatine um your mid-range stuff is going to be fueled by supplements like creatine
um your mid-range stuff is going to be more like beta alanine and then this is for more endurance
type things help fuel your muscles for like you're going on a long cardio piece shouldn't there be um
creatine in the pre-workout um they sell it separately but it's not um included in there i don't think so how long have these guys been your sponsor um been over two years now a little over two years i
think that's awesome started together congratulations get a haircut what do you know no what are you
talking about ali won't give me one i asked her what'd you say that's my hair she won't give me one I asked her What'd you say? Allie cuts my hair she won't give me one
Oh they're talking to you
Oh they're talking to me yeah
Now your hair looks good you kind of got that
You look like you fell out of the movie Troy
You look like you got kind of like one of those
You look like a like
Like you should have a bow and arrow and a spear
And be wearing like a little loincloth or something
You kind of you look like a
Like a Greek like a titan right now You look good i like your hair like that like a neanderthal no
not like a neanderthal like uh like how i imagine like dionysus to look like you know like you
should be holding a glass of wine in one hand a girl in the other hand and like staring in the
eyes of a dragon getting ready to fight you ever uh you ever read any books about the greek
mythology someone i took greek i loved greek mythology i took greek mythology in college You ever read any books about the Greek mythology, Simon?
I loved Greek mythology.
I took Greek mythology in college a couple classes.
I fucking absolutely loved it.
And Dionysus was my favorite guy because he was just drinking and partying and slaying hoes.
I mean women.
And I just loved it.
And he hung out with a lot of older dudes.
And when I was younger, I hung out with older dudes too.
How about you?
You like the whole Greek mythology stuff?
Yeah, I can't remember the author, but there's three books in this series.
I think one's about Greek mythology.
The one's about maybe just Greek history.
And the other one's about the Battle of Troy.
I haven't read the last one yet, but the first two are very good.
I can't remember the author's name.
Are you a Troy guy or a Gladiator guy?
Do you have a favorite between those two?
No, not really.
Okay.
Are you a movie guy?
I used to watch tons of movies.
I used to love movies and going to the theater,
but it just seems like there's not a ton of great movies out anymore.
No, movies suck.
Yeah, or they're all on streaming services,
so you got to hope that it's on the one that you have.
There's a movie out now called Barbie,
and I'm like, who the fuck is, like, who is going to see that?
Yeah, I always drive by the movie theater on my way into town to swim, and it's always, they always have, like, kids' movies or superhero movies.
The Odyssey and The Iliad by Homer, yeahiad by homer yeah good stuff all good stuff
especially if you got a teacher who kind of walks you through it
yeah that's um especially for
what's the plan for the games what what uh so so we how far out are we
what we're in july 5th so we're close we're like three weeks yeah four weeks yeah what
when do when will you start heading to madison uh where will you stay um
can you tell me some of the plans you put in place? You stocked up on your swolverine shit?
Uh-huh.
Oh, yeah, I'm driving to the games, which is really nice.
I hate flying because it's so, so hard to pack all your supplements,
recovery equipment, things like that.
But we'll be able to drive to Madison,
so I'll be carrying all the swolverine, paper treat coffee,
all things like that.
Smart.
And I'll get there, I think, Sunday or the weekend before it starts about a week ahead and um i think i'm staying uh in a hotel it's like 10 or 11 minutes from the
venue it's got a kitchen in it all that stuff so i'll be able to do keep my normal diet which is
really important for when you go to compete not changing up your diet too much. So that's a plan there.
And any big picture thoughts, goals, or is it just take it day by day,
just go there and just kick ass?
Yeah, go there and beat ass.
I think last year for sure I showed up to the games.
I was definitely over-trained, so that's something I've been working on this year because I think like last like last year was just a lack of confidence thing just trying to just do way too much training and not taking
enough recovery and rest days and getting way too much volume and eventually that starts to
take away from your intensity just with the volume in the day and also your body gets worn down and
you can't bring the volume that you need to with each session. So that's something that I've changed for this year.
So I think I'll be taped a lot better for this year's games,
and I think I'll be a lot more prepared with a lot of the skills
and a lot of my weaknesses, especially, like, just being able to train here.
I can do rope climbs and muscle-ups and wall balls anytime.
I don't have to – I can do them inside Metcons, too.
Like, if my my ropes in the
or in a tree outside i had to can make it difficult to do a metcon we had to go inside
to do one part and come back out to the tree to do your rope climbs so i think i've already
noticed a good difference there with my progress colton did you go to high school you went to a
public high school yeah i went to mountasant and um did you have a lot of
friends or were you pretty quiet kid or yeah I was pretty quiet um I had like my group of like
three or four friends I was very close with and hung out with a lot and they're still my friends
today but like um outside of that like you kind of kind of like friends that I'd be with on the
football team or wrestling team
but it's like I didn't hang out or talk to him outside of like practice and things like that
I never had like a real big circle that I hung out with and like I didn't go to any parties or
anything like that so it was a little bit hard to be my friend if you weren't like on the wrestling
team pretty much and have you noticed that there's a are you having fun with your life right now
yeah i like training um i does this what i want to do all day i'd be happy if i can just wake up
train all day hang out with my dogs hang out with ally and um you know i don't need to like
go out and see a bunch of people or party or anything like that to have fun and be content with just like staying here in my bubble and working what about the um all the people you're
going to see at the games does that give you anxiety like like there's gonna be a shitload
of people there you see and most of them you're not even going to know you know what i mean they're
going to know you but you're not going to know them you're never seen them before but they've
seen you a thousand times on their phone yeah that doesn't really bother me too much it's more like um i'm kind of uncomfortable in like
cities since they're so used to being out here and like pretty much just do whatever you want
like there's not as many like rules like um like last week i took the farm truck down to missouri
and i picked up a bunch of gym mats and like the
trailer doesn't have lights it doesn't have registration like the truck doesn't have you
know like updated like things like that and I can just go pick it up and nobody really bothers you
but like I bet you're not going to do things like that in the city so just I feel a lot more at home
comfortable kind of here around my neck of the woods like i remember specifically when i first started competing like i went to the dubai crossfit championships and
that was like a lot of anxiety just like being in a big city and not being home i'm comfortable but
it doesn't really bother me as much anymore but that bothers me more than just like meeting
strangers just there's so much to process all the rules the confinements the
walk here cross there go now don't go don't pee there pee there yeah exactly
god i love the example you gave you could just like like no one's stopping you from
driving from one your farm to the next closest farm with the trailer that doesn't have brake lights like no one no one's tripping yeah it's like you grew up and it's very normal for
like a little kid to be driving a truck around the farm and like nobody minds or cares and i
always tell ali kind of jokingly because she um grew up in sierra falls which is i didn't have
like 40 000 people there and i think Hillsboro has like 80.
So I always tell her, I joke and I say like,
you can't just do what you want.
For the most part, you're not going to get bothered by anybody.
Yeah, dude.
If you leave my house without brake lights or registration,
you're getting stopped.
And I live kind of in the country too,
but it's fucking California still. You're toast and and they'll talk to you like you're a
criminal you know what i mean they'll be like why don't you have your head you know what i mean
they'll talk they'll talk they'll step on your dick a little bit yeah i don't know if i'd handle
that very well uh hey dude i i'm so excited for you. Thank you for letting us rally around you. You are a great, you made doing this podcast for me so fun by just letting us jump on your bandwagon and always being so accommodating and visiting us in the comments and coming on the show whenever we ask. Thanks for letting us do this, dude. I seriously mean it.
dude. I seriously mean it. You could easily have not chosen to play with us. And I appreciate you playing with us. It's really cool. I really appreciate the community that you built here.
Kind of crazy just the people I've met and even the business side of things like working with
Vindicate and Paper Street Coffee just come from this community and um so i appreciate that and uh
hopefully i did a little bit better job of being easy to talk to i've been working on that
dude you killed it today i was thinking the whole time i'm like this is fucking easy
i've been prepping i got my microphone i don't know if you can see it no microphone oh shit
hey i don't even think that microphone's wow i don't think if you can see it No Oh shit Hey I don't even think that microphone's
I don't think that microphone's working
Hey
I don't think that microphone's turned on though
It definitely might not be working
But I appreciate the attempt
Oh look he hung up
God he's a good dude
Holy shit He got a light he picked up his phone accidentally hit the hang
up switch on us hey that's okay i think it took like john young and uh jr a little while and
in spin they had mics too that like it's just you got to get just because you have the mic doesn't
mean it's going gonna be turned on
or chosen.
That's,
that's another level.
Isn't he fucking great?
He knows,
he knows I pick on him here
being scared to have him on the show
because he's not gonna fucking talk.
I'm gonna be stuck here
with my thumb in my ass
and he prepared.
Fucking love that dude.
Man, we're lucky. What a, what a fun, what a fun thing to have cold mertens in our lives hey you touched the phone and hung up on us yeah i don't know what happened
there but definitely like exit out of the browser or something hey dude i appreciate the effort
you're so fucking awesome good luck
and I guess as we get closer
we'll be bugging you more you know the routine
we know you're busy and you can't always come on
but we'll be sending you links throughout
between now and the end of the games
and even after the games
so come on when you can make it work for you
and thanks again dude you're awesome
I'm stoked
it's people like you that makes I think for, for a lot of us, the games worth watching
because we have an intimate connection with you.
You've given to us, and we can root you on.
You're awesome.
Yeah, thank you. I'll definitely come on whenever I get the chance.
All right, brother. Thank you.
Say hi to your dad, and say hi to Ali, and we'll talk soon.
All right. I'll tell him. Thanks, man. Later, brother. Thank you. Say hi to your dad, and say hi to Ali, and we'll talk soon. All right. I'll tell him. Thanks, man.
Later, brother.
We want
Ali, says Dixie Normus. Dixie
Normus. Enormous Dix want Ali.
Wow.
Crazy.
Let's woo for Colton.
Step on the stop.
Good shit. Even David Weed. Look at it. let's woo for colton good shit even david weed
even he got on the colton train
look at that everyone loves colton
it's crazy
it's a fucking awesome dude
i'll try some swolver
i'll buy some swolverine stuff
to support my boy Colton.
I think Hiller left some pre-workout here.
God, that shit is addicting.
He was really nice too.
When he went to Costco, he got me some when he was visiting.
They have apple cider vinegar gummies.
I probably
couldn't have those around.
I'd probably eat the whole
I'd probably eat the whole jar.
Does Wolverine have anything I can inject with a needle?
does wolverine have anything i can inject with a needle i went to a friend's house the other day uh yesterday and i was telling him i was taking
these the bpc peptides and he's like you know that steroids i'm like dude shut the fuck up
it's not steroids not even close like what are you talking about got me all freaked out
he's a handsome little fucker yeah that's the most handsome he's ever
looked he looked great right he looked like a little greek god like he needed a little wreath
around his head a little like you know what i mean a little loincloth code merton oh really
code mert does that work oh there's a chick alley hey alley code mert code MERT. Really? In the cart? You type in MERT?
M-E-R-T?
What do you get for that?
You get a discount?
I hate affiliate stuff.
What did he get you at Costco?
I think he got me the pre-workout.
Some pre-workout shit.
This is heavy.
Definitely juicy now
oh oh shit here we go
a steroid by definition is a lipid
peptides are
chains proteins
so I'm not taking lipids
I mean I don't feel
I don't feel
like nothing's happening to me feel I'm not I don't feel like nothing's happening to me
like I'm not like
like I just have the same normal of erections
I'm not like
nothing's happening to me
nothing's happening
just putting a little needle in here
this thing
I think I even have a QR code for it
where is it
you can see what I'm taking.
Banners.
No?
Comments?
Brand?
Shit, there's a button here that's the QR code,
so you guys can see what I'm taking.
I don't even know how to find that.
Banners?
Brand?
Fuck.
Private chat? Oh, here, here, here, here it is. brand private chat
oh here here here here it is
I take this needle and I put it right here
and I put in some BPC
my hair feels good I'm not losing my hair
wouldn't I be losing my hair if I took steroids
god I have so much
fucking hair
9 12 p.m. Pacific Standard Time for those of you on the east coast that means it's
noon my bite my bicep um is is um is feeling better actually and i'm actually starting to use
it more um i did try i was doing um 50 i was going to try to do uh 150 pound dumbbell snatches the other day
just chill just kind of slow and uh my i didn't i quickly switched to uh 35 for the left arm
and i think maybe i only did 25 with my left arm because I was like, ah, maybe I shouldn't push it.
I mean, you know how we are.
I really want to push it.
I want to start working towards 100-pound dumbbell snatch again.
I am fucking huge.
For a little guy, I'm like a fucking house now.
I'm a little fucking muffin. I am a muffin, that's for sure little guy i'm like a fucking house now i'm a little fucking muffin i am a
muffin that's for sure but i'm not 220 but i'm probably like i'm probably high 160s i should
weigh myself no 150 pound snatches not 150 pounds i was basically going to do 50 dumbbell snatches in
each arm but i quickly switched after like 10 reps with the left arm i switched to 35 pounds
uh honest down to earth colton mertens deja and tendu yeah he was great
that was fucking great him and torres fucking hit it out of the park
they were awesome this is the i'm really excited about this time of year because suza was telling
me um hey this is the time of year where we just have people we do two people a day and we just
have them on for 45 minutes each the thing is though um uh um matt tor Torres I could have had on for like
three hours like we were
like we were fucking grooving
like this is gonna sound really weird but I kind of have a crush
on Matt Torres I know what Daniel Brandon
sees in him he's cool as shit what did
Heidi call him a fuck boy
he's cool as shit.
Yeah, he's cool.
That's the kind of guy you go to the club with
and you just get his leftovers.
Like, there's five girls.
Just all up in his shit.
Dude, I've been begging Dave to come on.
That's a great question, David. I've been begging him. come on that's a great question David I've been begging him
I mean in my own way I don't I don't I beg him but but I've been like
but by begging my man I've been using my highest levels of manipulation to get him on
completely ignoring me around that topic he matter of fact, when I talk to Dave,
he won't even really talk about CrossFit with me right now.
He's kind of got me at arm's length.
We'll talk about shooting and cars and wives and kids and diet.
He's been doing a lot of testing his sugar levels and fasting. He's been doing a lot of
testing his sugar levels
and fasting.
He's gotten super into fasting.
He's got this little machine
he was telling me about
where you can test your sugar levels.
He's pretty into it.
I don't know.
Colton's way cooler than Torres.
No, no, they're totally different.
They're both cool.
I don't think – don't get me wrong.
Colton's cool as shit, but Matt Torres is dope, dude.
He's kind of as cool as they get.
He was loose.
He was free.
I mean, they both were.
Bugs.
Sebi, when are you going to talk about bugs?
I got to find out what's going on with Gary.
I haven't talked to Gary in a month.
We invited him on a bunch of times, and he always had some reason.
He felt like – Gary felt like he was letting me down.
I'm like, dude, I don't care.
He's like, but I haven't gone to the gym.
I'm like, I don't care. I just want to hear your story. Like you don't owe me.
I don't care if like, if either way, I just want to hear your story. I don't care whether you
succeeded or not. Right. I just want to hear your story, but he was having trouble with that. So a
few times we've kind of missed each other. He's like can we wait another 30 days i'll bug him today
god every time i see this dude's uh this type one lifting um uh his picture i think it's craig
howard flat bill red shirt i have one that checks your blood sugar they have a bunch of cgms out in
the market cgms somethingGMs? Something glucose monitor?
Oh, constant glucose monitor?
Oh, Mabel.
Mabel with her head down and her hunting posture.
Hey, Seve, Tyson gave me his Snapchat.
We haven't talked much, though.
Oh.
Oh.
Wow.
He's busy, man.
When I, when I, I think he really likes me.
When I text him, it can take him days to get back to me.
I think he has his head down.
Oh, Lovin's.
That's what's going on with Gary.
You think he's just, just drilling his wife?
I don't know.
Wow.
Heidi Kroom.
Tell Gary to join my accountability group.
Interesting.
Hmm.
Hmm, hmm, hmm.
All right, two hours and 18 minutes.
Who's coming on tomorrow?
Oh, I have to um uh uh suza uh can we get new time and date for sean asap please i i really fucked up i mean you guys
will probably
some of you will be really happy but
on Thursday I was supposed to have this guy
Sean Hibbler Hibbler
on he's the flat the guys made
all the flat earth documentaries they're so
good
if you want to fuck with your brain
watch some of those they'll mess with your little
peanut oh so tomorrow morning I
have Greg Glassman on
and then tomorrow night we have Greg Glassman on.
And then tomorrow night we have Sarah Sigmund's daughter on.
So 7 a.m. with Greg Glassman and then 6.30 p.m. with Sarah Sigmund's daughter.
And I was supposed to do the Flat Earther guy tomorrow.
Okay, I know.
We are going to go to the park.
Savon's dog. We are going to go to the park savon's dog we are going to go to the park very shortly you know where we're going today we're actually uh uh savon's dog i'm going to take you to the um
i'm gonna take you to the high school we're gonna go there's a big massive high school campus up in
the redwoods we're gonna go up there and watch the boys skate skateboard on campus
it's a really cool high school every time we're there and we skate there and watch the boys skateboard on campus. It's a really cool high school.
Every time we're there and we skate there, no one ever says
anything to us. They're nice. Even some teachers will come
over, like summer school teachers, and watch my kids skate.
It's so sweet.
And then Friday, we have Louis Brackpool on
at 7 a.m. and at
6.30 p.m., we have the CrossFit Games Update
show.
This weekend's CrossFit Games Update show, I think, is going to be all CrossFit, by the way. CrossFit Games. People were like, that's have the CrossFit Games update show. This weekend's CrossFit Games update show I think is going to be
all CrossFit, by the way. CrossFit Games. People were like,
that's not enough CrossFit Games. Dude, this one's
going to be crazy. If you have not seen that
fucking wild video that
Fikowski and Vellner put out,
you have to see that. That is a bizarre
video.
That is a fucking bizarre
video. They put out a video. I don't even know
what the point of the video is,
but we'll go over it in the update show.
Maybe we should have Vellner on and ask him if he can fucking explain it.
Oh, fucking weird shit.
And then I was watching Laura Horvat train at CrossFit Krypton.
We'll talk about that.
I think she's ready to come on. There's some insights in there that make me realize why she was so uptight before why she couldn't like hang with the show
she used to be really uptight but now she's in virginia and i think ben kind of loosened her up
a little bit ben smith the great ben smith yeah you can bite today yeah up in the woods there
there's a lot of meth heads. Bite however you want.
Anyone come close to my kids, just fucking take a chunk out of their ass.
Yeah, the PFAA video, is that what it is?
Yeah, whatever the one that it's a trip.
It's a trip.
My son is a flat earther. I't get the flatter thing just what i don't get it really
either but watch the doc is is is so cool so the guy is so mellow he just is explaining
it's just cool i i enjoyed it
uh dixie normis uh velner was just on coffee pods and wads pedro's podcast uh it was fantastic
um i want to have uh that guy jelly on too that cough that um is it pedro had him on
who had him on but i want to have that guy jelly on the giant dude
Who had him on?
I want to have that guy Jelly on.
The giant dude.
I saw Pedro was like trying to figure out why I call him Pedro.
It's California for Peter.
Mexican.
Mexican.
Mexican.
Mexican.
Mexican for Peter.
That's it.
Just give him a little cultural vibe.
Give him a little cultural vibe.
Jelly toast, I'll bite for sure.
Yeah.
Oh, that's on Fikowski's YouTube page.
In that video, Laura looks – one, she looks amazing.
And two, there's a part in there where she said, yeah, when I moved here, people would call me honey.
Like, hi, honey.
And she didn't get – she would look at him like, who are you calling, honey? And so, like, I think she's like, before she was shitting diamonds,
she was so fucking, like, uptight as a person.
I think, like, being there, she's like, chill.
Ah, yeah.
Yeah, it's chill.
Everything's chill.
Hey, Brandon, what's up, dude?
How you doing?
Good to see you here.
Holy shit, good to see you here holy shit good to see you here
how is everything how's the house how is everything
fuck i guess that's kind of a weird question to ask who's someone just had their shit turned
upside down I sent you my phone number, Brandon, in your DMs.
Text me anytime, by the way.
It's fucked.
At least you have a good attitude.
Vindicate.
Brandon, hope you are doing well, my man man i don't know if i'm supposed to say
this but i'm gonna say it anyway brandon uh brandon's home was hit by a storm tornado some
shit the pictures are crazy his shit got all fucked up his house his car his whole i get the
good thing is his family's healthy and strong. That's awesome.
I have not seen Jelly's wife.
Is she awesome?
I'd love to see his wife.
I'd love to see his wife.
I will not covet her or crave her or whatever it is,
but I would like to see his wife oh news to me i thought it was Pedro, too. Yeah, Peter, Pedro, yeah.
Oh, here we go.
Oh, thank you.
I want to show you something.
The Burpee Dude.
Nice shirt.
How do you not own one of these shirts?
These shirts are so nice, by the way.
These shirts are so nice.
Hey, Sebon, you did 50 burpees for time the other day
I think you could beat a 6'1 dude
At 100 for time
I saw your burpee cycle rate
Oy oy oy
I can't imagine
You beating me
At 6'1
I cannot imagine I cannot imagine.
I cannot imagine.
I will tell you this.
So about a year ago, I did 50 burpees in two minutes, and I put it up.
It was like a minute and 58.
And a couple weeks ago, I tried to do it again.
I tried to replicate it.
I was like, oh, that was a I tried to do it again I tried to replicate it I was like oh that that was a fun
thing to do so I put down my camera phone and I tried to do 50 burpees in two minutes and I didn't
make it and I didn't even stop it was it was crazy I thought for sure I made it easy and I didn't
make it I think it took me 206 to do 50. I'm like, fuck.
So I was like, maybe I need to like lose five or 10 pounds and try it again.
I never posted it.
I was ashamed.
It's like, how the fuck do I not have 50 burpees in two minutes?
It's fucking pathetic.
I will show you this though.
This is crazy.
Last night, I was in the gym with my boys and we were fooling around and my, I'll tell you the whole, the whole story. My, my son, Ari, what I was, I had my kids do a lot
of jumping bar muscle ups. So that's basically the bars. I start the bar here and they just jump up
and lock out, jump up and lock out. And then I keep raising the bar and bar, bar, bar, bar, bar,
until it's like they're right over their head completely. And then they basically have to do bar muscle ups. Right.
And, and then sometimes I keep it low and I just add weight to it. You know what I mean? So I put
a four pound vest on them, six pound vest, eight pound vest, and they love the game. It's the
reason why it's such a good movement is it's so easy and you can start it at such a low entry,
a barrier of entry that anyone can do it, who can hold, jump up and hold themselves.
So I start with the bar here and you just jump up and lock your arms out, right? So easy. The
bar's like at waist level. They even laugh at me when I start them there. And so they don't even
know that they're working out. It's a great way to trick kids into working out, get them to slowly
warm up and then want to do more and more and more. So, um, I'm doing that. And, uh,
So I'm doing that. And one of my sons says, hey, he'd just been needing the balls last week. The one I think I told you guys he had to go to the doctor. He was actually needing the dick. They thought maybe his helmet was fractured.
So he had to go to the doctor. He had to go to Stanford. That's a whole fucking crazy story.
And so basically he was doing these jumping bar muscle-ups yesterday and he's like hey uh
it's kind of hurting my bladder a little bit when i bump on the bar i'm like okay
instead of jumping up and doing bar muscle-ups why don't you just jump over a box
so i had my son one of my sons start jumping over a box
back and forth and i'll show you what that looks like
um and you know what it looks like but i'll show you what that looks like.
You know what it looks like, but I'll show you anyway.
Just that shit that they do at the games, right?
So here he is, and he's basically,
he starts on one side of this box.
It's 12, 24, 30 inches.
So he's probably three and a half feet tall,
and this is a 30-inch box, right?
So he ends up telling me, so then I i have so he ends up saying to me hey i want to do a jump over the box and do a burpee and i want to do it wearing a vest
and i have my other son avi do it first and he does 10 rounds But this guy This guy ends up
Ari at 6 years old
He does 101 rounds
202 burpees
With a 4 pound vest in 20 minutes
This is fucking
This is crazy impressive dude
I've never seen anything like this
My forehead's burning
94
Your what's burning?
My forehead
He said his forehead's burning.
Can you fucking believe it? This is a six-year-old kid.
No, he's done.
There he is. That's his 200.
201.
This is his 101st round.
202 burpees.
202.
Sorry.
Yeah, baby.
I've never seen anything.
I've never seen anyone do 200 burpees to be honest.
I mean,
I'm sure I know.
I just never seen anyone do it.
Look at this.
And a fucking break.
He had a breakdown.
101 rounds. I know it's nuts. My other son had just. 101 rounds.
I know it's nuts.
My other son had just done 10 rounds.
Avi.
And then Ari goes, hey, I want to do it.
That's the dude that has the helmet that was bruised.
And he gets to 10 rounds.
Then he gets to 20 rounds.
Then he gets to 30 rounds.
It was fucking nuts.
And he went to 101 rounds.
And then collapsed.
Gave him some water, put him in the shower, came out, fed him a protein shake.
This is like at 9.30 at night.
And then half a hamburger and a hot dog.
And then I slept with him.
I let him climb into bed with me and I held him as he fell asleep.
Brown Media Seve, I have a question for you. I know you support the making advertisement of CrossFit documentaries and movies to grow the affiliates and drive more people to the sport.
What are Greg Glassman's views on this?
On the documentary? You mean like if it helps grow or not grow
i don't really know um i don't know for him there was i think for him there was a lot of
attention between the games and um the methodology and the affiliates and all that
for me it wasn't so much like that i didn't do it like that he'll be on tomorrow between the games and the methodology and the affiliates and all that.
For me, it wasn't so much like that.
I didn't do it like that.
He'll be on tomorrow.
We can ask.
Hope you're doing – that's Carlos, right?
Bone Media?
50 burpees and 206 is bananas.
Oh, well, good.
I'm actually going to try it again here any day now
I have to get it back
52 minutes
alright
it's 101 rounds
so this is the workout he did he jumped he put on a four pound vest
and he jumped over a box that was almost as tall as him back and forth 51 times and on either end
of the box did two burpees right so two burpees climb over a fucking box that's almost as tall as you. Two burpees, that's two rounds.
And then just go back and forth and whatever.
50, 51.
No, sorry.
101 times for a total of 202 burpees.
God, I explained that horribly.
But you get it.
Your kid should definitely wrestle.
Well, this dude's a jiu-jitsu stud.
He's really good at jiu-jitsu.
And he loves it.
He kicked ass at his last two tournaments, Gi and no Gi.
Yeah, and I probably should have him get into some more wrestling classes
because the kids that he struggles with the most in no Gi
come from a wrestling background.
All right.
Bone Media, I'll ask him tomorrow,
and it's pronounced Brown without the R.
Oh, Bown.
Oh.
Oh, I like Bone so much better.
I wish I wouldn't ask.
Fuck.
Wish I wouldn't ask.
Fuck.
Hiller did 500 live.
Wow.
Oy. Oy.
Probably feels better to watch your son do that than anything you've ever done.
Dude, it was crazy.
To be honest with you, I was a little concerned.
I mean, think, I programmed that workout with only 10 jump overs for 20 burpees,
and then you're supposed to rest.
It was just supposed to be an explosive workout,
and he ends up doing 101 rounds.
It was weird.
All right, guys.
Thank you.
I'll see you tomorrow morning at 7 a.m. with Greg Glassman.
Then in the evening with Sarah Sigmund's daughter.
And then, like I said, on Friday we have Louis Brackpool again.
That'll be fun.
That's the guy from England.
I think he's from Rebel News or was at Rebel News.
He's been on before.
Then we have the CrossFit Games Update Show.
That one's going to be wild.
All sorts of great shit.
All right, guys.
Talk to you guys soon and buh-bye.