The Sevan Podcast - Shut Up and Scribble // EP 79: Dubai CrossFit Championship programming

Episode Date: September 24, 2024

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Learn more at mx.ca. All right, we were just talking about Kyl Taylor this morning. While I'm eating a bowl of berries and honey, gotta recover, going back in the train. And how I just threw him the lob of his life on this week. It's like I need to instill confidence again. We need to make sure he, everyone else knows they don't have a chance if certain

movements are programmed. Colton obviously didn't want any other of the smoke today. Yeah, I don't think there's anyone at water Palooza SoCal right now. And I yes, I've thought about this. I'm not just saying it. I don't think there's anyone at water Palooza SoCal right now competing or not competing that could be tailored on that workout. Also, the love of my life is really just it being at 8am Eastern and 5am Pacific. I didn't even think about the timing. I was just

thinking about the movement combination. Wow. Um, is this listed as live on his YouTube? I don't know. We have four. We got four watchers right now. Here we go. Okay. It's all good, dude.

It's all good. I will say there is nothing of that movement combination at crucible for any of you wondering if Taylor gets special treatment. He does not. Workouts do start to trickle out tonight though. The slow trickle begins tonight. Oh, wow. First announced workout tonight. Yep, we're gonna go one we're gonna go in order one a night but you'll get might get a bonus and

get to one night. But by Thursday night, they'll all be out and by Friday, all the athletes will have the flow and the standards. So if people want to do simulation weekends, next weekend would be a good good weekend to do that. No, it wouldn't say the fuck out of there. Sorry, sorry. Taylor's not Taylor's too good for simulation weekends. No, I just meant don't come to crash and try to do them because I'm going to be there. I'll be there tomorrow.

So that means I'm doing this first announced workout tomorrow. Maybe, maybe you won't, maybe you won't, maybe it'll scare you. So that means I'm doing this first announced workout tomorrow. Maybe. Maybe you will. Maybe you won't. Maybe it'll scare you. Maybe it might be something I can't do. It's probably going to be something I can't do. You know, he hasn't announced me as an athlete.

This is how he digs guys. This is how he digs. He says little things like that. I probably can't even do it. It'll probably crush me. I probably won't want to do it just to wait to see if I'll say no, no, no, you'll do good on this one. Or yeah, that's what I'm waiting for. This one. This one's going to pummel you. So I'm

waiting for none of them are going to pummel me. Taylor said he hopes it's more like your one and your two. And this competition is a lot more like your one and your two. So he's going to get what he wants. And for those who don't know what I mean by that, year one, every single workout was metabolically extremely painful with the exception of maybe the 300 foot handstand walk, but it came after dumbbell Randy. So it was still. Yeah, but I don't think the rope climb DT one. I think that was more muscular.

You don't think that was more muscular? Oh my God. That was probably the worst one, dude. Yeah. 100% to me, that was the worst one. It was worse than the bourbon box the worst one, dude. Yeah. 100% to me, that was the worst one. It was worse than the burger box jump over one. It was worse than one.

Yeah, there ain't no low heart rate in this competition. I'll tell you that much right now. Everything, if you're fit, everything is gonna hurt. So. Good, that's the way I like it. So today we're gonna talk about, we're gonna talk about what? Some online qualifier stuff?

What are we gonna do? Yeah, what were the three competitions? It was Down Under Championship, it was down under championship dubai and then there was a third one was it beach brawl or big orange brawl oh i don't know i thought maybe it was beach brawl that had all the workouts released already the ones that you sent me with um fat grips dumbbell dt um back grips, dumbbell DT. Give me one second. Team workout, online qualifier workout.

RX events. Um. I'm just gonna. Okay, maybe it is. Alright, I'm gonna pull up beach brawl. Wow, they're using fat grips. Don't, you can't be serious. I am serious. Oh my god. Alright, let's start with them. And three, two, one, programming analysis, analysis, analysis.

Pensacola Beach Brawl. Boom. All right. Where are these workouts at? Is are they all in one place or I got to fucking scroll forever? You sent them to me. Was it on Instagram? Oh, there we go.

Individual event one. Oh, yeah. And this this competition too. I think it's worth saying they allow cheaters. They tend to program consistently. And what I mean by that is like, usually you'll get a long endurance like this with a swim, which is cool, because it is on the beach on the beach. And then a lot of times they do have a max lift because they just always have, I also think they have stuck to that trend that kind of was really popular and then went away and now is coming back where a lot of times the individuals that compete on like Friday and Saturday team up on Sunday and they do like a team competition on Sunday Which is what a lot of people used to do back in the day What I what I mean by cheat is that if you use performance enhancing drugs they allow you to compete even if you're serving a ban

Oh, I knew what you meant meant I was just ignoring it. Okay well let me just say this. There's only one thing about a swim that would ever fucking scare me and that's having a fucking shark in your logo bro. No bullshit sharks freak me the fuck out and I love the ocean I swim in the ocean all the time but dude don't make me think about a shark don't do that. And they are and they are plentiful in Florida these days I know that bro I'm not swimming I'm not swimming 400 meters in

shark infested waters holy shit a shark would love me dude it would be like you get an entire human being and then I kill boss on the side dude it's a meal for two I can't have a shark. Fuck, dude. That workout is crazy. I like it. 400 meter swim, 10K biker, one mile beach run. That is a long ass workout.

Hey, and listen to this. Taylor, this is something me and Taylor do disagree on. When he's programmed competitions before, when he looks at competitions, like for me, it's 20 minutes. For me, if you have something over 20 minutes and there's like five or six workouts, I think you're good. Taylor is a lot more of a, I think like a 20 to 30 minute time domain is one thing.

And then I think there's a 30 minute plus or 45 minute plus. And I, I like that outlook. I just have never felt like I could program a 20 minute workout and a 30 plus minute workout, but beach bra usually does something in that, like 30 plus minute time domain, which is cool. I, I, I get what you're saying. You know, maybe if you program something 30 plus, you need your other workout. That's longer should fall between like 15 to 18.

Um, and I'm cool with that. Plus you need your other workout that's longer, should fall between like 15 to 18. And I'm cool with that. Cause you know, honestly, the 15 to 18 minute workout is very rare in competition. I mean, like that, like a 2018 regional style chipper that's 15 for the best in the world, 18 or 19 cap, everyone else, great workout. And those are, I would say those are more rare than any format of workout is something that is truly 15 to 18 minutes.

Like that's a time domain and a feel that you don't see in competition very often, I don't think. Um, but yes, first workout 400 meter swim, 10 K bike, erg, 1600 meter beach run. I wonder why they don't have the distance adjusted for women on the bike. Uh, I do, I do because there's almost negligible difference in my opinion on that machine. I disagree when it's that long and it's a distance. I think it's like, I mean, maybe, maybe 10 K nine K two minutes.

I would, I wouldn't change it. Two minute difference. That's fair. Okay. Um, she's 16 a time cap. Let's go 400 meter ocean swim. Hey, going back to your point. What point there's a crucible workout with an 18 minute cap.

Oh, wow. So maybe you'll get that 15. So I'll finish in 12 and everyone else would be capping. No, no, no, you will not. All right. Let's see. You know me. I don't really like friendly caps.

Maybe on day one. Oh no, there better not be any friendly caps. Maybe on day one, when I want everyone to really get all their work done. And it's the first day, but no, I'm a, I'm a very aggressive cat person. Um, okay. 400 meter swim. I'm just trying to break person. Um, okay. 400 meter swim. I'm just trying to break the times down. You keep interrupting me.

Um, I think in open water, this is probably, you can safely say it's like eight to 11 minutes. The 10 K biker should be around 20. We'll just say 20 male and female mix 20 minutes. So you're at 28 to 31 minutes now. Oh man. And then best the best people could finish around 40. And I think they have that

60 minute cap so that almost everyone finishes. But realistically, if you're on the 1600 beach run and the cap hits, you're still walking how far it is back to the star line. So nasty. Love it. Okay, event two individual individual. hate it. Okay. Event two individual individual. Hate it. Sorry. Well, there it is. And like I said, there's going to be people like me and Taylor who are very max lift biased and that we think we shouldn't do them.

It's from the back. Unless it's a competition of like 10 events or more, just because it tends to skew. Will that endurance one maybe help to balance it? Maybe. Will there be a gymnastics one also that balances all three? Possibly. But usually when there's a one rep max lift or a max complex, it tends to wait more more heavily. Um, I'm just looking at the order on this cause this is interesting.

Like you said, it's from the rack. That's very interesting, but I just have never seen front squat to a clean. Normally it's a clean variation into a front squat, which is neat for them doing that. But what I also don't like is, you know, an Olympic weightlifting training that we use complexes for a very specific purpose. Like there's a reason you do this specific complex. There's a reason you that specific complex. If you're just throwing exercises in random orders for no reason, just because no one's

done it before, that doesn't make it a better test. I don't think like I don't like complexes with an obscene amount of re-racks where the weight's going to be crazy heavy. Like I don't think in competition to me, it's like, if you're going to do a shoulder to overhead, it's either a one rep max, or you give everyone jerk blocks and you give them a one minute window and you give them a set weight and you have them do an AMRAP or a two minute window. I don't like, Oh, seven rep or five rep shoulder to overhead, you know, from the

rack, I'm like, you know, from the rack. I'm like, you just, you're testing, I guess you can say absorbing forces, you know, testing something fitness wise. I just don't like it though. It's it's, it seems reckless. Um, same thing here. Like what's the point of a hang clean coming after front squats? Just the fact that it's never been done before.

Cause if that's the only point dumb. What do you think the best complexes will be on stuff like this? Like, I think, I think, I think just the second clean, I mean, yeah, the jerk will be tough, but doing this, I was just thinking maybe like 315, 325. I was 325. I think would be really good. I think 325 would win it. I would be shocked if more than two people were over 300 or more than three people were over 300.

I would say there's probably a pretty massive log jam around 285, 290 and then you don't have a chance under that. After we look at the workouts, we should see if there's a link to the leaderboard. We can see who's doing it. Because typically, right now, because typically they have some good people. I mean, I imagine they're pretty professional. They probably have a link tree with a like, not not like me. All right, individual event three for time 100 double unders, three rounds of dumbbell DT, three shuttle runs that are just 25 out and back, three rounds of dumbbell DT, 100 double unders and the weights are seventies and fifties. So you have six rounds of DT and I'm pretty sure that those DTs are with

fat grips. There's no way there can't be with a 10 minute cap, two minutes for the double unders. No, this is, this is just someone, someone's story. I, I saw doing them with fat grips. I imagine it's not with fat grips. All right. So two minutes for the double unders. Let's just be generous and say a minute for that.

That leaves seven minutes for six rounds of DT with the 70s. That in and of itself is hard. Let's just be generous and say a minute for that. That leaves seven minutes for six rounds of DT with the seventies. That in and of itself is hard. That's tight. That's tight. Yeah. That's dude. That 70 pound DT is no joke. Yeah. And I mean, like I see this and if you want to keep the format the same, there is nothing inverted anywhere in the competition. I imagine if they're doing like a rig Outside on the beach is pretty tough to get plexi or something like that I think a handstand walk in the middle because of the density of the shoulder overheads would be really tough on people You'd probably I mean the time cap would have to probably be lengthened. Yeah, when I see this workout I just just just go a hundred Dumbbell DT and then a hundred so yeah, just do 100, five rounds, 100.

Hold on. The male guy drives by my house and my fucking dogs go absolutely berserk. Yeah, the shuttles are just down. I really, I just, I don't really see the reason of doing the shuttles because just down and I really I just I don't I don't really see the reason of doing the shuttles Because there's only there's only three of them But maybe it's just I don't know maybe it's just

Maybe there's some kind of advancing with the dumbbells that you get after the shuttle runs. It was great to meet you. Mahlo Michael Did they do a tribute for Lazar? Did who do a tribute for Lazar? That's a good question. Don't know who you're talking about. A lot of people. I heard JY beat Taylor this morning. John Young beats everyone every day. Everything beats a lot of things. Except one thing. He doesn't beat. He's a good Christian. Um, all right. I'm really, to be honest, dude, I'm, uh, I like the workout. I like a dumbbell DT. It's not something that I know of.

Like, it's something mean you talk about. We like expect it rogue every year. Like, Hey, don't you think they'll do DT with seventies one day? Like, it's just something we, we talk about. Like that's just a very rogue type movement that I could see them do. It's a good, I'm so tired of seeing this fucking guy right here stone cold Steve Austin, whatever. These are Miller lights It is I don't know. It just I'm so tired of seeing that Just that's whatever. I'm just I'm just over it. Okay another 10 minute time cap

For time 12 snatches 135 10 box jump overs, 30 inches, 35 toes to bar. Round two, nine snatches, 155, 10 box jump overs, 25 chest to bar. Round three, six snatches, 185, 10 box jump overs, 15 ring muscle ups. That's a cool 12, nine, six, 10, 10, 10. I like that. 25, 15. That's cool. Yeah. It's a cool 12, nine, six, 10, 10, 10. I like that. 25, 15. That's cool. Yeah, it's a good workout. Wow.

That's a great workout. It's a good one. I like you. Okay. I like that a lot. To this point, they've had the bar complex, uh, front squat, hand clean jerk. They've had swim, biker run. They've had dumbbell DT.

So they've had really no gymnastics up to this point. They said no squatting yet other than the complex. No squatting. Yeah. No gymnastics, no squatting. Yeah. So this is, I mean, this is a good chunk of gymnastics though. There's 75 reps there.

Is there only five events? Oh, they're typically are five. So yeah, I think that's probably it. That's no more squatting. What? Yeah. So it seems like the only squatting in the competition is the three front squats. Goodness gracious.

Now this one is no pressing because they're using a biker twice unless there's a typo and this is supposed to be eco bike. Oh, it's definitely a biker. Let's watch because they use the biker in the first one. We got to get past Miller light boy again. Miller man. What a tool. Uh, are they, oh, they're not going to show anything. They're not going to show any of it. Yeah. Nevermind. Okay, you're relevant That's crazy biker twice. No squatting three squats and that there's not in single inverted gymnastic exercise Not even a fucking burpee Not even a push-up not even a dip this is crazy, I mean you have the ring muscle I'll split only 15 reps. That's nuts. Oh

Was Jessica did she compete? What's that I don't think that's this year oh, oh she's gone. Let's go to the leaderboard Layable are they doing? Okay. That's just a yellow wall ball. I thought that was a desk. It's probably in the bio That's probably Lincoln bio Wads waiver Visit and so called Beach mainsight. Sorry, I just gotta find the the actual

Lead a board Over can't find it that sound like a fucking typewriter or what very much so sounds like a IBM keyboard. Breeze scoring. Yep. Is that it? Probably. Upcoming events 2024 fall breach brawl. Later board. Later board. Okay, what this is fucking I don't know if it's live or not This is what we have there's no inputs in scoring. No, I know I mean the I think the competition is the same weekend is crucible. Oh Same we can I'm saying we can see who's competing. Oh, it's the same weekend as crucible I think so. Yeah, or maybe not because marks on there. So probably not what weekend is it right Riley good it's probably the weekend before it's probably the weekend before Tristan Meredith oh this guy never will be in it like Dalton Rogers oh yeah there's

some there's there's some good people going down dude Brian win, these guys are all slap dicks. I'm just looking at names I recognize as being regionals athletes or semi-finals athletes. Brian Wynn. Go back to the profile. Riley Good. It probably says it on there. Mark Hutchinson's like 107. Chris Martin.

What about Instagram profile? 927. Next weekend. Next weekend. Okay. Damn dude. What's the prize purse? There's not a single squat.

This competition. What are you thinking about? You think about trying to get in late? Oh my God. What is the prize purse? Typically, it's pretty good. I know they've they've partnered with mayhem in the past. So usually it's pretty good money. That's insane that they only have three squats,

dude. Oh, that is director got it definitely I'm not going. That is surprising. Who's competing on the female side? Can you pull up the female? I do want to see I just want want to see what their prize purses. They're not going to let's see what last year it was. That was team. Where's these individual boys? Are you big old boys? Where are they at? I need to announce that too. This year is six four two and there's money for event wins six four two and two two 250 for event wins for individuals. 250 bucks?

Yeah, for each event. Nice. So how many events? Seven? So let's see. So 1750 would be the amount you could, someone could technically win 8 grand if they swept and they won. Yeah, that'll be me Sweeping Sweeping that ass with a nook

All right Just so you guys know this is JR's. Oh, wow. I've been sharing this screen the entire time. Sorry I was scrolling their Instagram. I thought we were scrolling together and it was just me scrolling alone. Sorry Just so you guys know, this is JR's most annoying time of the year because he has to deal with me basically asking questions about the workouts. He's not going to answer any of them. I don't get any. I honestly, I'm like, I don't, not only, not only do I not get like a leg up, I get a leg down. He like really tries to fuck me is really how it goes.

Yeah. So those of you that are wondering why at this point I'm posting pictures of every single implement that could be programmed, it's because of people like Taylor who have asked me, oh yeah, I know you're not gonna do this again. Oh, well, this is obviously gonna be, oh, I can't believe we're using the blocks for burpees. That's so lame.

I can't believe we're doing that. Like that's what we're using the blocks for.pees. That's so lame. I can't believe we're doing that. Like that's what we're using the blocks for that. Those kinds of comments, whether directed to me or other people that we both know. Um, that's the reason why I am now just posting pictures of parallettes, obstacles, pegboards, trapeze bars, everything. Cause I want everyone to just, to scramble. Um, you can think Taylor. I, I don't really get caught up or Jesus.

I just want to hear what, she won't stop. Um, I actually don't get caught up in it. Bryson's making a little fucking cutesy here in the comment. He's trying to get his comment pulled up so we can give this fucking idiot more attention. Taylor makes fun of people. We're trying to get inside info until he's the one competing. Then he calls everyone. He knows it.

I don't make fun of anyone for trying to get inside information. I make fun of people and actually hate people who get it and use it to their advantage, um, when it's not me. So that being said, geez, this guy just won't. All right. All right. He's out. Uh,

the thing I will say, I will say, let me, let me interject this year. I have put out false information to people who I know like to talk just so that they will pass it along to people and it will be incorrect. I know who you did that to. I've done that for the first time this year. I know. And I know with multiple people.

And I know, and I know one of them. With multiple people. Yeah. Well, I'm just saying, I know for a fact, because I, cause I get tired of people like you asking around, seeing if they, if they can get information. Oh, that's hilarious. And you really think I would trust a word that comes out of Jason's mouth? Yeah, that's not, it's not his thought. He's not the only one. I'll say,

what's going to be great. What's going to be great is tonight when the first workout comes out and guys, I mean, come on. The workout is called dumb standard. I mean, I'm not going to program. This is what's getting released tonight. I'm not going to program sandbag cleans and swimming for dumb standard. Like where would I, Oh yeah to program sandbag cleans and swimming for dumb standard. Like where would I, well, yeah, because the, the sandbag clean is a dumb standard. You're going to clean it and put it on top of a, come on. I'm not going to do anything dumb. So yes, the names, the names do give a lot of way for sure.

That's why I put the names out. I have to say this is that what's being announced tonight? Dumb standard. It's going to be an order. Yeah. So just like the, just like the post that has event one, event two, event three, it's all going to be an order so that it'll say event one, dumb standard presented by best ever skin is.

Boom. This is the best ever skin. Is that a, yeah. Alexis company. Nice. I got to order something on Amazon to prepare for crucible real quick. I've been meaning to buy. Oh boy. Don't worry about it. Bryson, Lizzie's searching. You guys don't need to know, trust me. And he has no idea what it is either. Bryson's a little wanker. This is all I

have to say. There's one implement that you do like to use. And I told Lizzie, she's given nothing away. And I already know what, she's given nothing away. And- I already know what it is and I already know your thoughts on it and I don't care. Did she tell you? This is what, this is what. Did she tell you?

No, this is what Taylor thinks. Taylor thinks that if you have a flip sled, She told you. You should only use it to flip and it cannot be used for anything else. It can't be used to transport things and that if you push it like they did at granny games one year, it's just dumb because I have dog sleds and I could use dog sleds for that. Yeah. They want to do. Do you want to add anything? You want to add? Yeah. Pulling it hand over hand with a rope is dumb. Okay. Uh, going, going the only thing that could possibly be cool. And I'm going to give you an opportunity here to hit, to hit a home run. Burpee burpee clears. No, no. The only other thing that it could be used for

that I think could possibly be a partner push is a different story. That's teams, whatever, don't care. As an individual, I think it's incredibly dumb to push one. I just don't like it. But I also think the only other thing that could potentially look cool for individuals to do with that thing,

other than flipping it or sitting on it when they're tired is towing it so like straps over the shoulders or in front you know what i mean so dragging a forward drag a forward pull yeah like a forward drag but you could drag it with you could you could drag a dog so like that too we do it with straps and classes right i'm just saying that's the only thing okay then maybe we'll flip it dude, maybe you'll be happy. Doubt it. Maybe we won't even use it. Oh, this is a 25 foot... interesting.

Wow, that's expensive. How... oh maybe that'll work. I don't know. Alright, sorry. Now you're all up thinking about what I'm doing. I don't know. All right. Sorry. Um, now you're out. Now you're all up thinking about what I'm doing. Um, I don't, I don't care. I had a lot of guesses for thick and thin too. I bet you did.

There are, there are a lot of cool guesses in that comment section. Actually are there. I've heard a lot of people say drag rope, regular rope. For a lot of people say, uh, I guess. Yeah. I mean, there's, I mean, come on guys. Like I'm not going to use a name like that and not have something to do with like, with like an homage of some kind. How many comments are in here?

Okay. There's a lot actually. It was cool. I'm glad spin gave me the idea to do this. Cause a lot of people kind of got into it. Did someone reply to me? I didn't see this. Thick peg idea? When did I ever say thick peg? I remember you saying that.

Really? When was it? And I think we were talking about pegboard variations. We're talking about like horizontal pegboard or like a touch and go pegboard where you go like a third of the way up back down, two thirds of the way up back down, and then of the way up back down and then a full pegboard back down and you were saying something like what if they made pegboards with like with pegs that were a lot thicker that would be harder to do. That's a good comment. Okay any dingbat and her brother could have guessed this. Char bison, yeah, it's going to be so boring when that's what it is tonight. 30, 30, 30 for

Tom. Yeah, but it's not going to be with a hundred and single. It's going to be dual with the fifties and 35s. I would bet if it was that, I think that's way nastier. That midline sadness is a cool workout. I would probably just do like a single arm overhead walk in lunch though, with like 50 feet. I think midline sadness will have GHDs in another core implement a core movement. And I don't think it'll just be GHDs.

Like maybe a GHG, a toe bar and a burpee. The, um, that, that workout midline sadness is, uh, I think, I mean, people will have a chance to test it. So the they'll know, but the, that workout to me on paper is the least intimidating workout when you see, when you look at it. And then when you do it, you're like, Oh wow, that's actually hard. Let's see. Ooh. Midline sadness.

I think could have, I think either midline sadness. If you have handstand walking or an obstacle this year, I think either midline sadness is a place to do it or mad moon because I think you're probably using the turf for this workout right here. Am I sharing this? Yeah. You're probably using this, this turf for this workout. He's searching, he's circling lineman's fright for those that are listening.

And I would be very shocked if this wasn't, look, you told everyone we were doing strict deficit handstand pushups. I would be shocked if it wasn't in this workout. It just makes too much sense. Lineman's fright, big fat lineman, strong man's fear was the handstand walk. So I don't know. Maybe you do do handstand walks in this workout. I just think that would be too close of a twist.

I don't know. Maybe not. Maybe because you have an obstacle, it is lineman's fright. And then maybe you do the deficit strict here or the deficit strict. I don't know. I would expect it to be mad moon. Yeah. For the deficit strict. Hmm. I don't know. I would expect it to be mad moon. Yeah. For those of you that don't know, um, like your game's history, midline madness,

Ryan, a lot, a lot of people think it's the overhead lunge workout is not. That was midline March, midline March, midline set, midline madness was six rounds, very light yoke carry with running, which I don't know if I would have, I don't know if I would have, maybe it was midline, but probably not. Uh, I don't know. I mean, if that's how many times they used to yoke at that point in the game was that 2015, maybe, maybe only

was that the first year? Yeah, I don't know. But not a lot. So that was six rounds for time for me to run a hundred foot or even 50 meter yoke area or even 50 foot. Like it was not a lot. And it was six rounds for time for me to run a hundred foot or even 50 meter yoke area, or even 50 foot. Like it was not a lot. And it was just with 45s on each post. So it was like a three 65 yolk for men.

Um, so really just, and it was, you know, they were running the stadium, the berm and Carson, right? Soccer field berm. Yeah. So it was, you know, a little different than just a run, but dumb standard. This is what this episode is devolving. So it was me guessing all the workouts. Dumb standard is double dumbbell, clean and jerk muscle up, double dumbbell

snatch, maybe, um, although I don't know. I could, I could see you doing a medium weight dumbbell and doing a hang. What I thought would be the coolest variation. And I don't think you would do this, but when I saw that and I was like, Ooh, I think the coolest variation would be like a 75 for guys and a 50 for ladies and an alternating hang clean split jerk and then an alternating hang split snatch to finish like the split triplet exercises. I just think those are very aesthetically pleasing to watch when somebody's doing them right.

It's like, it's like reminiscent of, uh, Amanda 45, like squat snatches and muscle ups when performed by someone who's good at both movements is like really nice to watch. I really like those. Um, so I doubt it'll be that, but it'd be crazy if I was right. Midline sadness. I don't know. There are so many different directions. You could go with this. You could say, Oh, Jr is going to use the Yoke. You have a big, you know, plug up your butt for Yoke work. Um, it could also be, um, some sort of handstand walk with an obstacle. I think with like core movements, because that just absolutely obliterates your midline.

Um, so you could take it more literally. Um, I don't know, maybe that does have running in it. It's event two hours. So I have a question. Can you announce this? Can you announce the, uh, days that each events are on? Sure. So is this Friday?

Two, three, two, two, three, two. Okay. Oh, you're definitely running Friday night. Oh God. You're so running Friday night. So this definitely has running in it. Uh, I would expect then. Oh, what time are we at?

Okay. We got 10 minutes for me to fuck around. We didn't even get into Dubai, but we'll finish with Dubai. The workouts suck and we can go over them later. Um, this is way more fun. Uh, midline sadness. I think you're definitely running and it could potentially be, what was last year you did like run GHD flip sled. So I don't know.

Maybe I'd be surprised for you to run in GHD again, but I would also be surprised if you didn't run Friday night and have something long and grindy and disgusting. And if I remember correctly, midline madness was like at an 18 minute workout plus, was it not? Yeah, it was long. It was on Sunday. It was long. So I, yeah, I mean, I could see this being your,

similar to your year one Friday night grind workout, which would be cool. Maybe not handstand walks if it's running, maybe just run GHG, total bar, I don't know, something like that, med ball, GHG even maybe, or maybe just a regular handstand walk. I mean, once you haven't done a regular handstand walk since year one, was it?

That's correct. Wow. So maybe just run GHG handstand walk would be cool. Pilgrim, I have no idea what it is. I didn't, I only want to attempt to guess. Lineman's fright. My initial guess was like something with the flip sled or the dog sled in the turf and strict deficit handstand pushups.

Obviously, the twist on strongman sphere, right? They're moving an odd object implements. What kind of implement does alignment use? A sled, I would think, would be my guess. And then alignment's fright, if you're a big fat lineman, uh, well, here was my take is if, you know, if we're taking a kind of literal and alignments using a sled, you're pushing a sled in the turf. So that doesn't leave a lot of opportunity for you to use the obstacles to, to my understanding. Um, maybe, maybe there's a way that I haven't thought

of. So I was thinking, okay, the one plus one equals two, and it's going to be strict deficit, Hanson and push up. That was my guess here. Cyclists and not the light. I have absolutely zero gas. I just hope my, my first thought when I saw this was, Ooh, he'll use the bike Ergs. And I know you've used them in crescendo. Um, but you haven't used bike Ergs in crucible yet. Have you? Nope. And I would think that if you call it cyclists delight, I would like for it to be a biker. I know. Okay. Nevermind. Rogue didn't call that workout cycling. It was like a DT with a spin. Um, I don't know. I wouldn't, I don't consider an Echo bike cycling. I consider an Echo bike. It's like its own thing. So it'd be cool if you used a biker. biker, Mad Moon, absolutely zero idea. And I'm not going to give away my guess for thick and thin. That one's that one's a

private guess because I really think I have a good idea of that I don't want to give anyone an unfair advantage over me, you know, dude, you just went through all of them just say what you think it is. That way. That way. If you're right, you can say, hey, go listen to that show. I called it like all these predictions. You've gone through some of them may be right. Some of them may be completely wrong. And that's yeah, they may be completely wrong. I don't know, dude. That's one guess where I'm like, yeah, Ken, this was my guess to was

Pilgrim Tori sandbags. Stand Yeah, I right. I wrote this workout for Sentinel two weeks from now after I saw the name for this. I was like, oh, I'm going to do it. I haven't done it yet. No, he hasn't done it yet. He doesn't know what it is. Well, I haven't done the dumbbell standard is what I haven't done. That's what I'm saying. I haven't done 30 dual with 50s, 30 muscle ups, 30 dual 50s. I think that honestly hurts worse than regular standard because you have to hold onto the dumbbell for chunks. You can't do singles, right? It's obliterate to, Um, this, yeah, Ken, sorry, pillatory. I was thinking sandbags for that workout as well. Um, but that was like my only thing is like, Oh, what's shaped like a pill, but that could also be a completely

fucking knucklehead guess. Um, thick and thin. Uh, you know, obviously a twist on thick and quick was it four rope climbs, four overhead squats to two 45 or four and three. Maybe it was a weird number four and three, three and four, three and four. And what's that rope? Two and a half inches or two inches. Do you know? I don't know.

I think it was 20 feet though. But what was the thickness of the rope? Cause that was the whole point of the workout was a thick rope. I don't know how much thicker it was in a standard rope. It was like ripping something like that. Some of you, some of you use one inch ropes and your affiliates and you don't use an inch and a half ropes. So that's also an issue. Um, you don't like one inch ropes?

No, I think it's easy. Yeah. Um, well we have a two inch rope. It's just like using a female barbell. If you, if it says, well, it doesn't say I can't use it. So I'm using it. We have a two inch rope and I would initially think that it is a thick rope because that is something that hasn't been done since that workout in any

competition, in any competition hasn't been done at all in any competition has it i'd have to think about it but i don't remember any of the major competitions doing it no no because no one has and it's cool as fuck i mean it was done i guess the next year wasn't the soccer chipper or whatever done with a thick rope i don't think i don't think no i don't think soccer chipper was a thick rope. I think soccer chipper was just, it was just legless, right? So there were two ropes in that workout, right?

And I think one of the rope climbs was with a thick rope. I'm almost positive, but it didn't get much attention. Like I remember them not really talking about it. It's such a cool twist if that's true. I think one of the rope climbs was thick and then the like legless. one of the rope climbs was thick and then the legless and then the other one was um yeah this uh I a while back thought you would use cut ropes because that's another implement that has oh we used it at the classic so maybe you used it you probably wouldn't

use it um yeah I would think a thick rope climb, and then maybe even just a regular rope climb. I was like playing around, okay, thick and thin, like people are like Axle bar, regular barbell, double under, rope climb. Yeah, I'm gonna, that was the, Andy has one basically, because his hands are like this, they're like this fucking big

So he likes to use the two inch rope. So that's why that idea came to me. I Was like ooh, that would be cool and it's nasty and I never use it So what brand is it cuz rogue doesn't even sell I don't know. I think he just bought it on I don't know where he got it I don't know if he got it from like a like he gets a lot of shipyard Yeah, no, seriously. He gets a lot of our shit from like, he'll just go to like a fucking freight store like, or like, uh, you know, tracker supply or something like that. Um, but it's old as dirt. It's like his oldest Spencer.

I mean, he's just had it there forever. Um, he's like, that's my rope. Who's using my rope. Hilarious. Um, anyways, mad moon, Mad Moon and Pilgatory and Cyclist Delight are the ones that pique my interest the most. Yeah. Well, by next Thursday night, you'll know them all. Oh, tomorrow night we'll know Mid midline sadness too. Correct. Sick. Okay. Because I'm training I think Monday. Um, all right. Well, okay. Real quick.

Before we go. So let's go over this. Um, Dubai qualifier workout one, minute AMRAP 60 double unders, four wall balls, 30 pull ups, 20 hang power cleans, 10 shoulder to overhead. What is it? Uh, 60 40. And I don't know. And it's also just meh. So meh, like the entire workout is this right here. Really the hang power clean shoulder to overhead. Now, I mean, I don't know. I guess you group these three movements together and they had played some role, but I don't know, man. It just is like a man, just a boring workout. Not nothing wrong with it. I just think it's boring.

You. Um, I think the workout on its own is fine. I think if there was only going to be three workouts to qualify for something as highly touted as far as price purse goes and travel as Dubai, I think it's risky. I would say, yeah, it's super risky. And the fact that you have three weeks to do these. That's crazy. Yeah. I mean, it's like a, it's like a, it's like a, it's like a

second or third open workout field where you have three or four other things that yet to be tested and we don't hear there's only two. So that's workout on this one's even worse. They're doing shoulder overhead again, uh, 20 Cal row 16 for women should just be 15, 15 box jump overs, 10 alternating dumbbell snatches and five ring muscle ups. Then you go right into a five rep max shoulder to overhead. Um, I mean, the, the, the first time workout is fun. It's cool.

That's cool. Um, the, the shoulder to overhead five rep max is shocking to me. Not just because they did a light shoulder overhead in the workout before, but because of that, like, if you ask athletes, what's the what's the most annoying thing to do in a strength test? It's probably just re racking a heavy bar. Right? Like, whether you're doing a Bella complex, which is just re racking at once, or you're re racking it four times on this workout. Like that's, yeah, that's, and I mean, this is the kind of workout to I don't know what the time window is at 16 minute cap for everything. Like you might not have a ton of attempts and you have to be careful on a five rep max like you do three or four and you

fail and you're screwed. Let's say two minutes, two and a half, five you basically it's like a 10 minute workout for really fit people maybe a little under. Yeah, I think so too. Okay, next. This is crazy, 45. Hey, if you, I'm sorry, if you were gonna do that workout,

would you split them all? Would you push jerk them all? Would you push jerk two and split jerk three? What would you do on that? For a five rep max. I'd probably split jerk three, what would you do on that? For a five rep max. I probably split jerk them all. I would think. I don't know.

Fuck if I know. Are you going to say are you going to do in the Dubai qualifiers? Colton, I'm pro America and pro freedom. You won't catch me competing in Dubai. Were you going to say were you going to say spoiler alert, we're pressing overhead with a barbell again? Is that what you're going to say? What do you mean for the thruster workout? No, it's not what I was going to say. Although that's a great point as well. I was just going to say, wow, talk about two workouts. Like the first one in this one that

literally the room for separation is not normal. mean there's more room for separation on a 12-minute one but it's just like there's no there's no again there's three weeks to do them all there they're all so bland and easy it's just I don't know it's crazy it's crazy there's so much there's so much pressing my guess there's so much pressing not a big fan of these So the only wait a minute the only There's a 20 ring muscle-ups and there are let's just call it four rounds Let's call it three rounds 90 pull-ups is that the only pulling pull-ups and ring muscle-ups and that's it

Bring it up. Come on. That's a pull dude. Oh ring. Yeah, but I'm trying to give them benefit of the doubt But that's a hanging movement. Yeah That's it. So there's a ton of pressing in general. Thrustor bar facing burpee press press Five reps shoulder to overhead press and Then they're rolling but you know, what are you gonna say wall ball press? Far facing burpee, press press. Five reps shoulder to overhead press. And then they're rowing, but you know, what are you gonna say? Wall ball press, shoulder overhead press. Yeah, I mean, it's a lot of pressing. I don't know.

Like comments like these crack me up. Oh, oh, Elliot Simmons. Oh my God. Tell me you don't know CrossFit without telling me you don't know shit about CrossFit. Who's programming it, you know? Probably Elliot Simmons. That's probably why he's got his lips

wrapped around their cock. Sorry. Is that too vulgar? No, that was a little strong. No idea who's programming it, but I, oh, oh, is he talking about Crash? Colton, are you talking about Crash? Listen, buddy, he thinks, Colton are you talking about crash listen buddy?

He thinks Colton thinks he's got like such a nice easy road ahead of him here for crash You're going to see a competitor. You're going to see a side of me that you've never seen Colton in three weeks Commentary side no no not the fuck you not the commentary side motherfucker I'm not saying a single word to Colton this entire fucking weekend You guys gonna get in the chili goat together side by side shot chili goat We're gonna have two of them well in the go odd recovery zone even if it didn't see those sick mats the man with the hot tubs the hot tub versions I Don't know anything about a hot tub version Colton

Maybe you can speak on that the sauna will be on for use if you would like to do some contrast definitely will not be sawing especially after Pilgatory you're gonna need it yeah look no more mr. fucking nice guy okay I'll put it this way there's only one competition I've ever cared about actually winning and it's JR's competition a lot and I don't plan on showing up to fucking diddle my own dick for a couple of days. Especially with you nerds there. And guys like Nick fucking Matthew who are women's clothing on the competition floor. Yeah, just because you don't have it just because you don't have a robust midline

that could shoulder a 340 bag doesn't mean you have to throw shade to him. I don't think he should have a 340 bag, bro. I think that bag was deflated. Just like Tom Brady's footballs. Interesting. This is my crossfit. Oh, shut up. I've been practicing them for weeks now. Oh boy. I'm working on what I need to be working on bro. You just trust that.

You just trust that. What do you think the heavy workout's gonna be? Of your event? You've never done a heavy deadlift. You've never done a heavy deadlift. You've never done a heavy clean. And when I say clean, I mean, not delineated squat clean. You did that squat clean year, or was that delineated? Like, did you have to squat clean that

the year with the obstacle? Yeah, that was anyhow. It was. Okay. Most, most, most people squ it though, but it went to 40 yeah, I was gonna power that for a fucking triple Snatch ladder the year you won went to two. So that was a squat though. You had to squander. Mm-hmm. I I would say you haven't deadlifted

Heavy ever you've only done a deadlift in That you've done the 50 axle bar was it axle bar deadlifts a hundred Yeah, and then you did the deadlifts and that DT rope climb workout So those were the same way so I wouldn't be surprised if there was a heavy deadlift which would bode well for me right now I've been fucking crushing deadlifts You've used a 200 sandbag for men. You've, this is what I don't get. You haven't ever done a heavy power snatch. Um, you also haven't ever done a heavy power clean. And I was trying to think of when the last time there have been like heavy cleans in a competition that you could power that most people could power. That was just like

a clean that I thought was cool. And like maybe like a two 45 type weight, that kind of weight, like a two 75 weight even. And the last time we saw that was that quarter final workout. That was two 75 cleaning jerks and bird boxers or awful Annie. And I think that's just a super cool, it's a movement that doesn't get a lot of attention at all. Um, and of course I say that because I like it, um, power snatch though, as well, I think would be cool.

I could also see you doing something with, uh, heavier dumb bells, maybe. Um, I don't know. You've used the 200 pound sandbag a lot, so I'm not sure, you know, maybe you do a carry with it. I've only used it twice. Yeah, but you used it last year and the year before. Yep. Two times. So that's like the most two previous years. That's why I don't know. That's why I just say you've used it a lot. You've used it the most, what I'm thinking of like the previous two years,

I'm thinking, when I think of anything that you're considering repeating, I guess for me, when I think if you're going to repeat something, I'm looking at like, okay, what did he do in year one that he would consider doing again? I don't know. Heavy. Yeah, I guess my mind immediately goes to those three things, a deadlift, a power clean or a power snatch. You've done relatively heavy bench presses. You know, I don't know, there's dumbbell, you know what I mean, the dumbbell bench that got heavy. You think the sled push year one and year two with the push and the drag,

you think those are heavy or no? I count those as heavy, but they're not axial loading, which I just don't consider as taking as much of a toll on your CNS. You have to be strong to move it. But like for me, I probably moved that sled better than anyone in the field. is taking as much of a toll on your CNS. You have to be strong to move it. But you, but like for me, I probably moved that sled better than anyone in the field. And I wouldn't say I was the one RM guy in the field at all that year. I mean, you had fucking Jacob Faff.

He's strong as fuck. So I do think you have to be strong to pull a sled, but it's a different kind of strong, if that makes sense. I don't know the scientific difference between the two other than that. You're not loading your spine, like you're not supporting a weight and that's a lot different strength wise than pushing or pulling an object that's not on you. In that regard, I'm incredibly strong, especially, especially with sleds. but, um, I would say like, if there was something moving a distance that to me feels more like a strength movement, it would be a carry like a yoke carry farmer carry bear hug carry. But again, your axle, your axle loading there, you're loading the spine. Um, Stephen tack, it is a 200 pound sandbag considered heavy anymore. I would

consider a 200 pound sandbag like a two 75 I would consider a 200 pound sandbag like a 275 power clean. For some people it's like a brick wall. You think it's more like a clean or more like a cleaning jerk? I think it's more like a clean. I don't think the 200 pound sandbag to clean is that hard. I would say a flip sled is more like a cleaning jerk. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Um, yeah, I could also, you haven't done a, you haven't done a nasty lunge, um,

in a long time. Maybe haven't done a lunch since year one. Is that right? Yep. Wow. Okay. Not in line. Not for crucible. So midline sadness could have a lunge in it. Oh, that would be epic. That would be poetic. Um, I just hope you don't put all of the movements I'm good at in one workout like midline. If, if, for anybody, if for anybody that thinks that I would do something like this, I would not, I would not do a front rack or a Zurcher yoke lunge.

Absolutely not. That's where the line is drawn. That's where the line is drawn. Yeah. How can you lunge with the yoke? You probably, you could probably lunge with it if you pick it up. People are just, dude, people have asked me stuff like that. I'm like, no. A yoke lunge? That's, that's too much. Yeah.

How would you even do that? Where you'd have to pick it up enough off the ground to where it wouldn't hit when you went down. Like, come on. People are retarded if you're asking that question. I thought you were going off on a rant that you would never put like all the movements I'm good at in one workout. You probably, you don't even think about me. No, but if anything, I would that way you just that way it would, it would just show that there's no favoritism.

Um, Ken Walter's thinking this is driving me crazy is also retarded. This is like you thinking the vaccine works. I would love, I would love to just go ahead and put them all out tonight. Cause I'm just really excited to have people do them, but I know that three weeks is too long. So I don't. Cody Loveless from best hour.

How are your class coaching reviews going? I did my first home with Pat last week and it was great. It gave me a lot of feedback that I implemented the very next day. Most of it was around like a building rapport during the general warmup, rather than allowing that to be kind of a quieter, silent time, filling the space with relevant, uh, coaching, I don't know, talking. Like it was during a general warmup where there wasn't much coaching needed.

And I wasn't talking. I was just walking around making checks and stuff, and I could have used it to customize the workout for people or whatever, or just, you know, start a conversation. Uh, start a conversation. Uh, it was good. It was really good. Colton, you're fucked. I just want to reiterate.

Um, all right, we've gone way over. You're so hard right now. All this talk about your competition. This is, it's like the open for me. This honestly, knowing these workouts because you're the only other person who programs a competition, no offense to anyone else. Well, maybe, maybe everyone else. You're just biased, dude. No, I just like, it's fun to see the workouts. They are exciting in the way that open and quarterfinal and

games workouts and semi-final workouts are exciting. Um, yeah. Other events just ain't got it bro. Oh, I will say this NorCal was exciting because we didn't know until the night of that was crazy. But I'll hop off. I'll hop off Ben and Blair a little bit. Would you rather all, all of them be like that? Like like what I'd rather your event not announced until the night before.

Yeah, I would. The reason I would prefer that is because I'm better than anyone that's going to be there at seeing something the night before and being able to do it. In most instances, there were a couple things in NorCal that I did have to practice the bar complex. I hundred percent had to practice, but everyone did. The backward handstand walk, I should have practiced, but I didn't. And I should have, I, you know, when I agreed to go, I was like, Oh, I'm going to have

to practice backward handstand walking. Cause they did it the previous year and I just didn't practice it all. But I was also in Italy on vacation. But like, for example, the kettlebell hoist, like stuff like that, like things that are weird that you just don't, I do really well on things like that. And snatching a lot when I haven't been snatching. Yeah. What's up bitches?

All right, guys. See ya.