The Sevan Podcast - The REVIEW of The Dave Castro WIR | Monday 16, 2024
Episode Date: April 19, 2024*My Tooth Powder "Matoothian":* https://docspartan.com/products/matoothian-tooth-powder 3 Playing Brothers, Kids Video Programming: https://app.sugarwod.com/marketplace/3-playing-brothers/daily-practi...ce ------------------------- *Partners:* https://cahormones.com/ & https://capeptides.com - CODE "SEVAN" FOR FREE CONSULTATION https://www.paperstcoffee.com/ - THE COFFEE I DRINK! https://www.vndk8.com/sevan-podcast - OUR SHIRTS https://usekilo.com - OUR WEBSITE PROVIDER ------------------------- ------------------------- *BIRTHFIT PROGRAMS:* Prenatal (20% off with code SEVAN1) - https://marketplace.trainheroic.com/workout-plan/program/mathews-program-1621968262?attrib=207017-aff-sevan Postpartum (20% off with code SEVAN2) - https://marketplace.trainheroic.com/workout-plan/program/mathews-program-1586459942?attrib=207017-aff-sevan ------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Make your nights unforgettable with American Express.
Unmissable show coming up?
Good news.
We've got access to pre-sale tickets so you don't miss it.
Meeting with friends before the show?
We can book your reservation.
And when you get to the main event,
skip to the good bit using the card member entrance.
Let's go seize the night.
That's the powerful backing of American Express.
Visit amex.ca slash yamex.
Benefits vary by car and other conditions apply.
Bam, we're done.
Couldn't sleep, then train at 5.
Just crazy morning wood at 4, and so you just go to bed.
Just crazy morning wood.
You ever have to pee so bad in the morning that you can't turn
and you just can't fall back asleep?
So you're forced to get up and pee?
You have an erection because you have to pee so bad?
Yeah, that's every morning.
Does this happen to you?
The wasted erection.
I call it the wasted erection.
I should play taps.
I should play taps every morning.
You can't do anything with it.
I mean, you can, but not when you got three kids in the house. You can. I want to take your environment. Yeah, you can't do anything with it i mean you can but not when you got three kids in
the house you can't i want to say you're in boner yeah you can yeah you can how dare you argue the
limitations of the morning wood uh you're in boner i hate them how much uh how many of you ladies
are taking the urine boner sorry go ahead sorry go ahead How much caffeine you drink killer? A lot, like way more than you.
Is it like around 900 milligrams?
It's like a, it's a gram plus a day.
Oh my God.
It's,
it's 700 milligrams first thing in the morning.
And then it's like an energy.
Look at it.
You're just sitting on the fricking counter.
It's just like,
they're everywhere.
Wait,
wait,
wait a second.
So what do you wake up with?
What do you wake,
take when you wake up?
Wait, two, I'd say like two and a half scoops. Then it'll explode first thing in the morning. So what do you wake up with? What do you take when you wake up?
I take like two and a half scoops and then I'll explode first thing in the morning.
And what, with a pint of water?
Yeah. First thing in the morning, I drink like 20 ounces of water and then I refill the shaker bottle and then I make it.
I just kind of sip on it for two hours.
Oh, so it takes you two hours to get that. That's your morning coffee, those two and a half scoops. That's starting though.
Yeah.
Let me see.
How many hours?
I usually have another one, another scoop or so around, or an energy drink or two, around
two or three o'clock.
So when you go to bed, this happens to me.
I feel like I have to pee five or six times in a row before I go to sleep.
If I have a caffeinated drink probably
after three yeah if i drink too much caffeine i pee all day oh yes but like it's like going to
bed i'm like i have to pee again i just peed two minutes ago but if i don't if i take caffeine out
it goes away immediately i thought ken walker says he does a bong at 11 a.m i was like damn man but he says he drinks a bang
at 11 a.m every day so you wait two how did you end up doing two and a half scoops how did you
get to that amount uh i've been doing it since high school and then i probably don't need the
two scoop i probably need like a scoop and a half and it wouldn't be i wouldn't even
and then the one that i do later is just to keep the headache away,
which you do another scoop.
Yeah.
Around two o'clock or so.
And then if I take it after two,
then it messes with my sleep.
So I cut,
I try to cut off caffeine.
That is unless I know where to be a week late.
And then I can Tyler that's 1600 milligrams.
That's a gram and a half.
Dude.
I had eight. I had eight rains when we were at Waterpalooza.
In one day?
In one day?
Yes, in one day.
You were working, though.
That's cool.
You probably just swiped me out.
I don't know.
At the end of the day, I was like, I think my blood is at least like, I don't know.
It was like engine oil.
How much caffeine is in a Jocko Fuel?
Not much.
Like 175, 200 probably.
I don't even think it's that.
Jocko Fuel.
I wonder what it is.
If someone finds out, let me know.
Oh, how much caffeine in Jocko Fuel?
Oh, 95 milligrams.
95.
They're okay.
I probably had 10 to 15 of those a day at the games, I'd say.
Jocko is the worst energy drink.
Why?
It just tastes like shit.
Oh, I think they all kind of taste like shit.
Sure, yeah.
I mean, I like it, but they all, I mean, I'm not like...
What are you drinking right now? Water out of that?
No, I'm drinking a scoop of the no i'm drinking um a scoop of the like not even a scoop
a tenth of a scoop of um swolverine like bcaa or whatever in a um in a pint of hot water
just tastes like flavored water okay hot water it's like tea oh yeah like tea it's like tea
okay swolverine tea um just so you guys know
uh some something crazy happened yesterday uh i i was i was trying to figure out in my budget how i
was going to give away some money for the um heat one app as you guys know the only game in town
the only game in town uh thursday friday sat, Sunday, depending on how it plays out,
is the Taylor Self vs. the World on the 7-On podcast quarterfinals.
Colton Mertens, Jason Hopper, Dallin Pepper,
Fittest Man in America, and then Taylor Self himself,
the badass, the born primitive savage.
They are going to go head-to-head,
and it looks like Heat 1 is giving away twenty five hundred dollars
for who wins heat one god i thought i heard that is that the most you guys have ever given away
yes holy shit and it's only it's against you just got to win that four-man bracket thing well so
they'll be mostly they'll be the four-man bracket but then we'll also have like little side bets you can do you can earn like bonus points is how you can think about them so the fee versus lindsey
lane we'll have bets on those two um we will have bets on like the regular quarterfinal stuff like
will tia come in top 10 that'll probably be like a bet we have but it'll only be worth like 10
points whereas will colton get first on the first workout? That's a hundred,
150,
150 points,
something like that.
So it's like the main point driver is, uh,
Taylor self versus the world.
Cool.
Why would someone not play this?
It's so fucking easy.
Download that.
You just push button.
Like,
like the names are there and you just click.
You don't have to pay any money.
You don't have to deal with anything.
Nothing. Just download it. You have to give your email no uh well yes i don't ever remember giving my email
i don't get spammed by you guys you'll remember shit we don't spam we have never sent an email
from anyone this is crazy and how do you how do you do that who's paying for that who gives you the money for
that if you don't i mean so tell me but no go out sponsoring the the um the prizes they're they so
they committed today to sponsor the prizes from here for the rest of the season so they're only
getting bigger from here going forward you mean for semifinals you're giving away even more money
and for the games giving away more? Yes. How much did you...
Do I have to blow someone at Gowad?
What did you commit on my end?
No.
No, nothing.
Just...
Who owns Gowad?
Who owns Gowad?
Do you know the...
Tebow, that's the guy's name?
Tebow, thank you.
This is crazy, dude.
Thank you so much, Tebow.
Fuck Gowad's the shit.
Tebow and I have been getting...
Tebow or Thibodeau? Thibodeau. Fuck, Gowad's the shit. Tebow and I have been getting to know each other. No, we're Tibidow.
Tibidow.
Yeah, what is that?
How do you even say it?
Do we have that word?
I don't know.
It's French.
It's French.
Tebow.
Tebow.
Tebow.
Tebow.
Gowad.
Hey, I would love to run a commercial for them or something.
Do they have like a 30-second spot they can get us?
I'll reach out, yeah.
Dude, this is crazy.
It's nuts.
He's crazy, but he's so invested.
What did you say?
Hey, will you give 2,500 bucks to my friend Sevan for this ding dong podcast he has?
He just believes in what we're doing and that it will help the future of the sport.
I'm not taking anything from anybody.
I'm just getting you to like, hey, look at Colton and look at Taylor.
They're going to do a workout. Which one do you think is going to win? You're doing that anyway. from anybody i'm just getting you to like hey look at colton and look at taylor they're gonna
do a workout which one do you think is gonna win you're doing that anyway oh you mean why not just
sign up and just yeah yeah we're just creating reasons for you to want to watch the athletes
and t-bull what if you're on a droid people don't let them play now
yeah chief nation all right dude that's crazy go odd thank you t-ball it's huge it's huge
and go go download their product or go like posts they make or do something in return like
i can never return what he's given us, but please try do something.
I don't even know if I follow these dudes on Instagram.
Go on.
Do you remember the other,
that other company that just like disappeared when they changed their name?
Like they're idiots.
I remember them slightly.
Yeah.
They're,
they're,
they're so dumb.
The ones who left,
left our prize winners hanging idiots idiots god wad no
go wad go wad oh shit and they got all the big names katrin doter fraser doter brooke doter
hoffer doter uh yeah um uh roman doter what's the guy's name? The swimmer guy from Finland?
Koski.
Koski Doder.
Magawa Doder.
Oh, my God.
They got my boy.
Jay.
Crouch Doder.
Jay Crouch Doder.
They got Mal Doder.
Mal Doder.
Who's this? Just nobody is they got nobody doter the program
who's this okay uh georgia doter willy for 1000 who's this willy oh that's willy he's been there
a bit if i ever call is this ben smith in the middle here no oh i think that's willie again oh
i know my ass you just saw that guy jesus look at this the shot of brooke right down the pipe
my goodness i don't know if that's appropriate look they got uh they got military doter lens
military all right hey i would love to have this dude on the podcast in the next
couple days if it's possible you're pointing at fraser when you said that who when i said military
doter no and you said i'd love to have this dude on the podcast oh fraser's always welcome fraser's
always welcome god look at uh adler's neck here what's his neck doing he got to shave that bottom part it makes it look like his he's half a second for blacking out for sure neckbeard
doter yeah neckbeard doter smiling doter uh
media doter hey madaris wasn't a dick to me at the games i just want to say
i put that together
I go, I wonder how he's going to receive this
He being you, not Medeiros
Oh, I liked it, I thought it was great
I was just thinking a whole bunch of different things
That I've seen
Sevan Doter
Oh shit, Noah, is this really Noah?
I hope so
Hey Noah, I have your, if this is really you i have your phone number and i want to have
you on the podcast just you're under 18 i didn't want to call you and text you end up on like
megan's list or mandy's list or whatever that shit is there's no way maybe it's gotta be why
would he respond why would he say that why would he just pop up? I don't know.
I mean, it's a fantastic name.
Awesome.
I know he's a real person too.
He builds bridges with that name.
Sevan, do you remember the main... Listen, by the way, I didn't even read this before I put it up,
but there's something that you've done to crack the code.
Probably when you started with the word Sevan,
but it's interesting which ones I pick. Sevan seven do you remember the main site pick post of a
hoo-ha during a rope climb close-up and everyone freaked out
is that years ago like you could see the chicks kazoo like a labia majora or something
i don't i don't remember i like it's tickling something way in the back of my brain like I
remember talks of this or something but not the event itself I keep hearing about uh Heidi's
Instagram post but I went over to it and I and I don't see it it's not you dude I thought
funny you or something did you okay let me see Let me see real quick. By the way,
this is the Dave Castro weekend review.
I'm just so excited that a go Wadden to bow.
Is doing.
And then thanks Tyler for doing that.
Thanks for having faith in the project.
It's crazy.
It's the coolest thing.
It is literally saving quarterfinals.
Quarterfinals is the most unwatchable.
You can't even watch it.
So you're creating the only content that exists.
Why would I not get behind it?
Thank you.
I agree with that, but I just was too humble to say that.
I don't want to put my own dick in my mouth.
I don't see it, Hiller.
I don't see it either.
Where the hell did I see it?
Yes.
I saw it earlier
it's on her
YouTube
no it's your story
it's at
Heidi Kroom
and it's not there
okay
let me see if Heidi has a
YouTube oh yeah it's a story
it's a story dude I's a story, dude.
I just said that like six times.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay, yeah.
It's a story, dude.
Okay.
What about Snorri?
It's on her story.
Oh, a story.
It's on Heidi's story.
Hey, you'd be so proud of me, Hillary.
You know what I did today?
Huh?
I ran for a minute and then did 10 deadlifts with
135 for 20 rounds no you didn't i did that's 200 just a one minute run no no yeah yeah yeah
yeah that's still great at what wait 135 what is this is, shit. I'm keeping the women's meat.
Wait.
Okay.
It's me, save I'm a toothy.
I'm keeping the women's meat because I'm a pussy.
So here we go.
Save I'm a toothy.
And here we go.
Andrew Hiller, did you complete 15? Completed all 15.
Were they too, too.
Oh, I love the way he moves his head.
Were they to scale, to head. Were they good reps?
Yes.
Is that Taylor Self?
Taylor Self.
None of you pussy bitches could do it, so here I am.
Okay.
What's your name?
Taylor Self.
Oh, my God.
Wow, she nailed us.
Damn. Hey, I thought he acted me pretty well. Oh my god Wow she nailed us Damn
I thought he acted me pretty well
The head
Yeah that was amazing
His eyes were moving around and stuff
Wow
I wonder how long he watched your content
To be able to get that right
Maybe one
It disgusts me
I'm insulted that it's a story and didn't get made as a post.
It was insulting.
It'll disappear now.
Yeah, I want to be post-worthy.
Okay.
The Dave Castro Week in Review on Tax Day, April 15, 2024.
This is at one and a quarter speed.
Tyler Watkins from the Heat One app.
Andrew Hiller from Hiller Fit.
Hey.
Where else did I see?
Colton's post today was crazy too.
Colton's was good.
That Taylor Self outfit was a lot like those things from the Whoville,
like the Who's from Whoville.
Does that mean Taylor looks like a Who?
No.
With the eyebrows and the eyelashes and the whoo. Is that the thing? Thing one who? You know, talking about with the eyebrows
and the eyelashes and the who?
The thing. Thing one, thing two, maybe? I don't know.
This Colton video.
I mean, he went
so hard, like, I got uncomfortable.
I love it.
I like that he's doing the
WWE
bit. He's like
slowly walking into that.
Where is it?
It's on his story.
I think.
Oh,
no,
it's a post.
You sure?
It's it.
Oh,
you're right.
It's not that one.
Wait,
not that one.
I'll find it.
You think I need to refresh my shit something it is a post here it is i got it here
i got it i got it you're just hanging out on this page okay um let's see here we go colton
colton mertens will be competing i believe he is in i believe he lands in
charlotte tonight i believe he'll be, I believe he lands in Charlotte tonight.
I believe he'll be at Crash in the morning, shaking that ass.
Okay, here we go.
What's up, guys?
Happy Monday.
We're at the farm, battling the pigs.
I'm actually thinking about something.
I wanted to see what you guys thought.
Check that out.
Isn't that crazy? Isn't that crazy?
Isn't it crazy?
5'4", artistic pig farmer, goes to CrossFit games,
or training in one half of his father's two-store garage.
Thank you, Eddie.
Thank you, daddy
Six foot one second
Trains full-time at the east of you
Let me tell you something
Jason plopper in a few days. I coming to your home To whoop your ass again
Live
Live
See you guys soon
Do that live
Live
Live
Hey so what happens
Like he's just having a moment of clarity
And he just turns the phone on and he says fuck it I'm going hard in the paint you think he's just like fuck these guys cat's out of the bag
i got a little fucking tick and a twitch i'm going hard he's got that uh tractor running and he knows Holy shit. There he is. Taylor's the Lorax.
Oh my goodness.
Wow.
I dig it.
He's creating the story.
Yeah.
Someone said Dallin's got...
If only Taylor could talk some shit.
Someone said... Never been to anybody worse than that.
No, it's just Leo
the floor.
The only card he's got is
making dudes airtight.
I haven't been able to sleep lately. The pressure of facing
these three live all weekend
has just been too much for me. I'm sure
it's going to be a very close race.
has just been too much for me.
I'm sure it's going to be a very close race.
Holy shit.
How do you think he did that?
Holy shit.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
That's good.
Oh, my God.
Oh, that's really good.
Holy fuck.
Oh, my. That's really good. Holy fuck. Someone get that for their screensaver.
He texts Nick.
He texts Wadzombie.
Wadzombie had these on.
He's ready to go with these.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, see?
Look there.
There it is.
I had no idea.
Oh, my goodness
god these are all scary i like this puppy one amazing oh my goodness
oh they took a little time with it they they cropped that the front puppy head in
The front puppy head in.
Did he,
did he do a more?
Wow.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
I see it.
I see it.
Look at you.
Oh, you mean the way they tuck Colton's head?
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's them.
Wow.
Yeah.
That's not easy.
It looks comfortable.
Hey,
they should have changed Colton's hair to the same hair color of the dog.
His mustache is the same color.
Just use the, what is that called?
Like a copy, the copy tool?
Oh, my goodness.
Okay.
All right.
Yeah, I'm telling you guys, this weekend's going to be.
Hey, and Jason's got to do something now, man.
So does Taylor.
This is going to be something else.
Are you going to? They're they're getting whooped up on
you're gonna be with will leahy right i'm hanging out with the guy oh yeah you're gonna go with
here yeah you're via the house of bill hey uh hillary i was actually on the phone with jr today
and he was asking if you're gonna be able to come on any of the shows i said we would could send you
links i said you'd probably love to okay oh yeah, I would love to. Oh, Clone Tool. Thank you.
Brandstetter. Clone Tool.
Thank you. I've got to teach myself
how to use
Adobe.
The Clone Tool is probably
something no one's used since the fucking 80s.
There's probably a better way to do it.
I visual edit on
a program used for mocking up websites and apps.
It's not even meant for what I'm using it for, and I use it anyway.
Yeah, just bend it, force it.
I'm just like, yeah, this will work.
Okay, guys, here we go.
Our great leader, the Dave Castro, the transparent one, the forward-facing one.
What?
Have you ever changed clothes?
He's always wearing the same clothes.
He's always cold.
What are those things on the ground on the right?
Oh.
I don't know.
I can't tell.
Oh, that's a
That's a steel target to his right for shooting
Do you see it here in the right hand corner
Yeah
I wonder if it's just a steak
What movie is that in
Enhance
Mason Bourne
Alright
The Dave Castro Week in Review
Brought to you by GoWOD.
Here we go.
Week in Review, April 15, 2023.
At Molo, please.
Still doing guest programming on main site after open quarterfinals are over.
Really enjoyed that.
Thanks, Dave.
Yes, we're going to continue to do guest programming on the main site after Open and Quarterfinals
are over. We have some
cool guests lined up. Always
enjoy adding some new
perspectives into programming.
So we will continue
that. Andrew, how's the guest
programming been?
How many have they had?
Six or seven? I think I've
only really been fond of Dale's.
And so the rest have been ass?
There's not as good as Dale's.
I don't like the concept in general.
When it comes to programming,
I think that you got to have some sort of an idea what's going on.
And the best thing about.com for the longest time would have been,
you can see where it was going.
You can get an idea of what.
There's just no sense of direction
when you're kind of just like hey here you go have fun nice job two weeks for you and i don't
i'm not a fan of it in general i know why they're doing it but it's it's well as to why they were
doing it do you think like participation in dot com was way down or something? And they're just trying to get people involved?
Oh, way down.
I mean, I never really.
What do you mean participation?
You mean just like people following it?
There used to be hundreds of comments on that.
Or just like people logging their scores and it's down.
Unless it's a massive workout like a friend or the step-up workout that you love so much then uh then there's no sports over like 30
or 40 some days they'll break 60 but it's that's not good i think it's i i think basically what
they've done is they've let we have by having guest programming they've let the world know
that this is not the program to follow yes it used to be amazing from like the inception of
dot com through probably 2018.
And then Greg kind of fucked it up a bit when he started to do things like slips and everyone's like, what are we doing these for?
We don't really see what this is all about.
It's like a progression into some gymnastic stuff.
And exactly.
They look at it and they'd be like, what the hell?
This is different.
And when you can start to tell that it was different in 2017 or 2018, maybe it was 19, then all hell broke loose to the point where now they're trying
to do stuff like this to fix it and this is exactly what i was saying what crossfit said
problem with guest programming is if an affiliate does the same thing it would be a bad affiliate
yeah do you agree with that oh yeah oh my that's a great point just guess it's not enough well hell
i mean like wouldn't every training training camp be considered guest programming?
An affiliate?
Like, hell, I mean, Jethro over at Chief Nation is doing Hiller fit programming.
Isn't that guest programming?
Andrew Hiller, your wife is a babe.
Nice pool.
Oh, thanks.
Pat?
Yeah?
I've been following main site for the past couple weeks in preparation for
quarterfinals and really been enjoying it this morning i actually had a uh 45 pound pack and
then 40 ground overhead with that pack and then ruck a mile then 30 ruck a mile 20 ruck a mile
and uh did that it was fun it took 40 minutes. The first ruck mile was about 11, or actually 1030 pace.
The second one was 1055.
And the third one was 956.
So I used to be really good at running with a ruck.
I haven't done it in a while.
I would have liked to have seen all those in the low nines, high eights, but currently not there.
At Brian Stone King, 3122.
Hi, Dave.
Thanks for the week in review videos.
It's really cool.
When you share your workouts
using CAP or main site programming.
For my gym, I use main site this year.
We're using 2002 and it's been going.
So this gym is using main site,
but they went back to 2002.
Yeah, because they're smart.
It's been great going back into the archives.
So I highly recommend that for people who program
to actually go back in the archives
and either research the
programming and or use the programming. Over the years, I've known a lot of individuals and
affiliates who do that, who use past programming for themselves or for their affiliates. I also
do recommend really being a student of the programming and understanding programming
and following someone's programming, maybe even before, um, before recommending you
program yourself. I think my thinking, I believe my thinking has evolved on that topic over the
years. And now I do see, cause actually when I think about it, I just didn't start by programming.
I started by following and observing and really looking at. So I do think this idea of following
something like cap or someone else first, and then learning from that and eventually programming on
your own is a good recommendation at coach frankie that's kind of a duh right
yeah i think everyone does that right i don't know you think you just wake up one you think
you just like go to you think like uh you're doing bodybuilding you've never heard of like
the girl i interviewed last night hayley adams she had never heard of crossfit you think she
should have just started doing her own programming you're gonna have to observe to a degree because it's like okay say say like something's gonna have
to inspire you to do crossfit in the first place let's say that's the crossfit games you're gonna
look at the crossfit games you can be like okay what the hell did they do and then you're gonna
try to program off of that so you are observing from that degree but i don't know like to me i think there's not
enough like do you remember back in like 2012 like people just fuck around and program crazy shit
yeah and i am guilty of not doing that enough and so it's like i i don't know i i can kind of go
both ways on this argument i i didn't ever start programming for myself until i don't know. I can kind of go both ways on this argument. I didn't ever start programming for myself until, I don't know, the last five years.
But before then, I just cherry-picked everything.
I followed main site, but I just cherry-picked like a motherfucker.
Yeah.
And now all you do is ride this all bike.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
And do deadlifts at 135.
After years of cherry-picking, he's found the perfect program.
What do you want as heidi would
it's how you would say the pussy weight yeah half the question are there any level fours that have
received the credential for dei purposes and the same question about seminar staff any seminar wow
wow i'm loving this wow wow hey you know they got rid of pukey unfortunately fitness all because
of woke shit right like somehow that shit was – that's like the American flag is racist shit.
You know that.
That's why Rosa got rid of it all.
I was there long enough to hear those discussions.
It's crazy.
That and eventually programming on your own is a good recommendation.
Coach Frankie, Dave, question.
Are there any level fours that have received the credential for DEI purposes?
And the same question about seminar staff.
Any seminar staff that are on there for DEI purposes?
That's where I was brought back. I a dei hire we were sitting there like fish in the water and he's just like me
when you're writing that comment you're like okay either like it's just an all-in moment either he's gonna pay attention or he's just
totally gonna disregard this they have a ton of dei hires there but dave is not one of them
i don't know dude he just said he was no he was he is not a dei hire do you count as a dei hire
even if you're not a DEI hire?
Well, 7 would be one too, no?
Yeah, I'd be one too.
Yeah.
You're even a more rare DEI hire.
I would be.
Because he's gay?
I'm definitely non-binary. I was non-binary before it was a word.
You have a gender, you're a douche.
Okay, here we go.
At Jesse Gavin.
Hey Dave, some friends and I are attending the games in Fort Worth.
Basically the point is, I don't even understand the question.
You can't take the level four and then they're not passing you
because you fucking are a gay pygmy dwarf.
I mean like, they're not passing you as a level 4
Whatever the process is to become a level 4
Like no one's getting that
Because they're black or white
Or green or
It's not like they have 12 level 4s
To hand out and there's 13 people
Right
Right
I don't have a tism
That's Hillary got the tism.
And Colton, apparently.
I'm normal.
Colton's got all sorts of shit going on.
Colton's would be an epic DEI hire.
He would be.
Yeah.
Actually, the only reason why Colton took 18th at the games,
they gave it to him because he's DEI.
I don't know.
He's like, he's almost DEI. I don't know.
He's like, he's almost DEI on a bunch of different levels, but not enough.
Right, not yet.
I agree. He'd be like, ah.
I agree.
I agree.
My 40th birthday.
Some people mentioned that prices have increased compared to Madison,
and there will be less to do because Masters and Teens have been moved to other locations.
Does CrossFit plan to do something to fill the space between events?
It used to be filled with Teen and Masters competition.
It seems like people are getting less for spending more at this point.
It's funny you say that about the Teen and Masters competition
because I've been to 99, almost every single game we've ever had except for one,
and even specifically at this last year's,
when the Teens masters, and honestly,
even the teams are competing,
that stadium is not full.
And for certain divisions,
it's arguably even close to empty.
So this idea that all the ticket holders who bought tickets to see the
individuals,
then also really watch the teams and age groups is,
is not,
it's not reality.
They were off doing other things while those were,
those events were happening.
And once the individuals did start competing, then the stadium would fill up, especially in the evening around the premier time slots. And during those times when the teams and the age
group athletes were competing, I imagine the fans were doing the same thing that the fans can do
this year at the games when there's not competition going on out in vendor village and and taking all that in i will say this too as a fan and a spectator
it is tough to sit through a full day of competition without disconnecting some
so not having those allows you to disconnect from the competition go to the vendor village
see the rest of the community maybe do a workout yourself maybe i would say that again how does
he know what he never sat through a day of competition in his life he's always doing stuff he doesn't know what it's like he's like right anyway hey i
just i just want to also say that and when i say people are were there hired for dei meaning that
there were people there who had who weren't hired based on merit meaning that there were people
there there are people there who would i can build a house and it's going to be a fantastic house and it's going to take them build a house in a month, and it's going to be a fantastic house,
and it's going to take them a year to build the same house,
and it's going to be a shit year, but they're a gay black dude,
so he gets the job.
Right, right.
That's what I'm saying.
That's what I'm suggesting.
I've heard you say it a thousand times.
I want to put my spin on it.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Do a fan engagement.
Or a chick.
Send some money.
Or a chick.
Yeah, thank you.
Asians are no longer
following the dei by the way sorry they kicked you out vendors and then come back and engage in
the competition i don't think for your money we're saying you're going to get from nine to
seven full competition that's not what we're selling at the crossfit games we're selling a
unique experience we're selling um seats to watch the fittest in the world compete several hours a day,
but nowhere does it say that you have to have something to watch from first
thing in the morning to last thing at night,
you will get your money's worth.
And I'll say happy birthday to you.
I'll say happy 40th to you while you're there.
So come up and mention this at fish eight.
That experience will be heightened.
If you download the heat one app and go to the games.
Are there betting odds on that, whether or not this person can find Dave?
Like one in a thousand chance she finds him and gets that?
We'll put it in.
Do you guys have any comments about that,
about people paying more and getting less?
Everything's just more expensive expensive i don't know i don't know and fewer people will be there's fewer ticket sales too right in the stadium i thought there were more oh okay maybe you're
right i have no idea if you had like i think the seats are more prime though because there isn't
the outdoor venue which is just like open seating.
For some reason, I thought Dickie's was smaller.
Less opportunity for fans.
I could be wrong on that, but I thought it was a little bigger.
Okay.
But I also know there's no outdoor stadium.
Yeah.
You had seats.
Did you all ever eat Lunchables?
Oh, yeah.
No, I don't know what that is.
It's like a snack lunch.
It's all crap.
Is it like crackers with cheese and then it's got a red stick in it?
Well.
No, that's kind of.
I'll pull a picture.
You're going to die.
But in a Lunchable, there's like a bunch of crap you don't want.
Not really.
Well, for you maybe. I always thought there's like a bunch of crap you don't want. Right? Not really.
Well, for you, maybe.
I always thought there was like shit in there that I was like,
I don't really want this, this, and this.
No, I've never seen those.
It's like a little cracker with a little stupid piece of ham or turkey and then a little piece of cheese.
Okay.
And there's usually enough to make like six little cracker cheese sandwich things.
Otherwise, no.
But there's always, there's like other shit that comes cheese sandwich things otherwise no there's always
there's like other shit that comes in there too like there's an oreo and it's like they just took
all the other stuff that like no one really eats that they just kind of throw in there
and they took it out and so it's like nachos i guess you're paying more for less but you're
just kind of paying for the same thing you were getting you just weren't eating the other thing
and now you don't have to eat.
The pizza was shit too.
Hey, everyone at the games,
basically if you buy a ticket at the games this year,
you're going to see all the events.
Whereas in the past they had tickets where you didn't get to see all the
events, right?
There was like shit tickets, like poor man tickets.
Yeah.
Although I heard it was really easy last year to sneak into the games.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, I think all you would have had to do,
since they're not going back to Madison,
all you would have had to do is enter through the RV park.
But no, I mean even to the stadium.
Like there were people in the stadium who didn't have tickets.
Oh, that's what I'm saying.
Oh.
Just enter through there?
Yeah, and then you're good.
I don't think I could sneak around through there. Judy Reed, white there. Yeah. And then you're good. I don't think like I could sneak around through there.
Judy Reed,
white adjacent.
Yeah.
White.
Thank you.
Isn't that what you did?
Sevan?
Kind of.
1,400.
Thanks,
Ortega.
Here we go.
M-A-B-8.
Hey,
David,
be cool if the CrossFit affiliate map had a feature on it where you could
mark what affiliates you have been to.
CrossFit could make a leaderboard for people who participate,
and the person who visits the most gym wins.
Maybe there would also be a category for those who did a drop-in
and bought a t-shirt.
Could be a review section like Google Reviews.
Could be verified by the gym owner.
Could also simply be your own personal map of the affiliates you visited.
That's a cool idea.
I like it.
At 85 Trans Am.
I like it, too.
This isn't even a week.
They'll execute on that
in 2050 i also try to get let's try to get names for quarterfinal at uh team quarterfinal athletes
first let's let's start there i would i would i thought he was going to say something sarcastic
at the end there i don't know yeah like good idea you can do it or something like that yeah i do think it is a cool idea i mean
it would inspire people maybe to like to set the record for that what is that what was that thing
hayley adams did on snapchat like you could hold the right you could set a record for sending the
most nudes consecutive nudes day in and day out i think it like that, but they didn't have to be nudes. Oh, I was,
I didn't understand.
Thank you for clarifying that.
The snap streak is just like consecutive days,
like talking to people.
If I signed up for Snapchat,
if I signed up for Snapchat,
would people send me nudes?
Yeah,
probably.
Yeah.
You'd probably get dicks.
Great.
I never classified what type of nude he wanted.
Yeah. Just whatever.
All right.
Non-binary.
Non-binary.
You can review. It's just a Q and a, well,
these aren't really questions. It's not a traditional Q and a,
they leave comments and the idea. I like it.
At 85 Trans Am. This isn't even a week in review. It's just a Q&A.
Well, these aren't really questions.
It's not a traditional Q&A.
They leave comments and then I select some that I respond to.
And there is actually a little portion that is a week in review of the previous week.
And it's evolved over the past several months, years that I've done it.
But whatever.
What kind of fucking question is that?
Should he change the name to answering questions,
fielding questions from dipshits?
That's a long acronym.
Weekly fielding questions from morons in the community.
Dave, have you watched the physical 100?
A CrossFitter just won the season two,
just aired on Netflix.
He beat out 99 other athletes of varying athletic fields,
MMA, wrestling, gymnasts, firefighters, military, weightlifters, rugby, soccer players, et cetera.
Many who had reached the pinnacle in their sports, Olympian national teams, et cetera.
I haven't watched it and not a surprise at all. Of course, a CrossFitter is going to win in a test call that's unknown and unknowable and largely uses, I would say, unknown functional-like movements.
I don't know what the movements they use are.
Even if they're not functional, it, just the nature of being physical.
How about that?
Unknown and unknowable and physical,
a CrossFitter and especially elite CrossFitters
and I have an advantage all the time.
If we had an event that was move 100 cinder blocks
from this side of the building
to that side of the building,
and it was for time,
whoever finished first,
guess who's gonna win?
A CrossFitter is gonna beat, let's see,
the MMA guy, wrestling guy, gymnast, firefighters, military weightlifters, rugby, soccer players, unless they
train with CrossFit and have that natural work capacity built in. So what you're saying isn't
a surprise because of the efficacy of the methodology and what it's based on, constantly
varied functional movements executed at high intensity and what that creates and what that
delivers to the individual and their work capacity across broad time and modal domains and what
they're able to do in all tasks at life.'s like the essence of crossfit being prepared for the unknown
and unknowable so i haven't watched it and not at all a surprise i heard imagine real quick that
that dude doesn't work at crossfit anymore like who the fuck did they have to say anything like
that nobody nobody nobody are we like to buy some Facebook ads
yeah
we're gonna have an affiliate call
it's fucking
that's the closest thing I've heard
to anything worth listening to in a little bit
and it sparked off of a question that didn't
prompt it
oh my god
he defines what CrossFit is and why it's valuable
and how it would
lead do the winning of a competition such as that it was good i think the only two people
messaging crossfit in the space now at all is number one you and number two dave oh i'm number
one i do you mean like dm and them no no no like like what greg used to do the only people like
like when hillary messaging i see yeah messaging like so to keep people on the path like we live in a very we live in a lane like that whole thing
that um uh hillar did where he talks about defining fitness and the difference between working out in
the gym and working to getting a full depth squat as opposed to when you train when you compete in
the open and then um it's okay to know that people in the open versus like just in your affiliate
workouts you're working on getting them depth all that like all that was just shit that like used to And it's okay to know that people in the open versus like just in your affiliate workouts,
you're working on getting them depth.
All that, like all that was just shit that like used to be being said all the time.
Like just the messaging, keep remind saying the same shit over and over in different ways
and just keeping, keeping the community focused on what we're doing.
So we don't end up with some weird shit.
I promise you the second Dave's gone, the games are going to have some ridiculous gimmicks in them like crossover double wonders yeah i didn't want to say because
i love adrian but dude there's only two the the biggest messenger to the community is andrew
hiller and then the second biggest messenger is dave just through this hit dave's just like
kind of keeping the community and the loneliness away
and
and Hiller's actually speaking
to the methodology
and that's it that's the only
people that's the only messaging we have
it's crazy and here's the thing too
I bet you I'm starting I said I bet you
only 3% of the community knows who Andrew is
I bet you it's less than 1%
cool
I know and the cool
thing about that is is the chance for growth and taking over the messaging is massive you know
jason told me that today cf media he goes yeah i go to this place this gym and no one knows about
anything in the internet sphere yeah yeah yeah yeah and then you get so positive in the affiliate go hey watch it
you know that infers right and he goes what it's like you're telling me i'm negative it's like
that's wrong no no i didn't explain that to me i don't get it jason said that like the inside the
walls of his affiliate it's so nice it's so positive everyone's so friendly and i'm like
what are you getting at with that you try to say it's not so friendly on the internet, Jason.
Oh, and your shit's not even not friendly. It's just mess. It's just,
it's just messaging. And here's the thing too. I'll tell you what,
one other thing. If, uh,
if Sousa is going to take over the messaging to the affiliates,
that's good. That's going to be the spot where all the affiliates aggregate.
So you're going to have people those 1 000 or 2 000 or 5 000 listeners you have half of them are going to
be affiliate owners soon and that's going to be a really potent spot for messaging so um
that's that what's i would like to know like you'll be the gambling god of messaging. I hope so. I think about, like, if you think about when CrossFit was a cult,
there are religious things that are important.
And what you're talking about here is repeat the mantras.
Repeat the mantras.
Repeat the scripture.
Sing the hymns.
And no one's doing that.
And how little hymns can you sing until people start leaving the church?
It seems redundant. It seems ridiculous that you have to say it all the time. It won start leaving the church it seems redundant it seems
ridiculous that you won't leave the church the church will change the church will change next
thing you know the vatican will be accepting um tranny's getting married oh wait they do
yeah that's what happens you'll lose next thing you know all the new people would say wow we need to not treat crossfit
like a religion and it's like but people are bought in like that and don't don't just throw
those tools away because you don't like the way they taste so anyway that was very well said
i heard actually a crossfitteritter has won the previous two seasons.
At Moises.
And they won the Titan Games too, right?
At one point, yeah.
Yeah, we just kick ass wherever we go.
This dude drinks so much crap.
Who?
Dave is always drinking.
Always.
He can't help it.
It's like his Brad Pitt move.
Brad Pitt always eats in movies
if you ever notice that yeah yes it's so it looks cool dave drinks uh bernie gannon vatican not
quite uh there yet oh my bad fake news broken skull ranch hunter oh crossovers are not gimmicky shit they're a staple of anyone who takes a jump rope seriously
hf hello fidelity i liked hello fit hello fits better
i can't i'm not good with the crossover stuff so i can't claim it too
stupid hi dave i apologize apologize if this is already mentioned,
but are those skate decks on top of your safe?
You still drop in on the local skate park and shred on the half pipe,
do a kickflip.
Those are skate decks.
They're from a local company, Gunco in Hollister.
I'm good friends with them.
They gave them to me.
I do not skate.
I have skated a little growing up, but I don't skate.
As an adult, I skated around a little when I had a testing facility in
Carlsbad, but I don't skate.
About six months ago or a year ago, I skated around a little when I had a testing facility in Carlsbad, but I don't skate. At Avera.
About six months ago or a year ago, he told me he went out trying to skate.
I think his daughter was running and he was going to skate next to her,
and he's like, fuck that.
I can't do that anymore.
96.
Hard.
Dave, clearly you have a tough outer shell,
and the online CrossFit channels with the most followers and loudest voices
certainly test your resolve when it comes to the program.
So opposed to the pundits who seem to speak on behalf of the 1%,
I'd like to say on behalf of the majority
that you are doing a fantastic job with the programming.
The overwhelming majority are part of CrossFit
for the wellness and fitness, not the competition.
With respect to the hate towards CrossFit
associated with private equity taking over for Glassman,
I think the majority despise that the woke crowd pushed Glassman out and the
outcome being private equity,
equity ownership that everyone knows is guided strictly by monetary gains,
not the heart and soul that drove Glassman in his pursuit and fitness of,
and community a lot there.
Thank you for the first half where you,
what's hilarious speak in support of my,
what's hilarious is that he says i'm not part
i'm not as part of the 99 no one in the 99 is saying anything
i did i did i i do i do like his programming i'm very happy with his programming but the second
part yeah you said that i didn't like it the other day i was like dude no fuck i like the
open programming oh you did okay i don't like it the other day. I was like, dude, no, fuck. I like the open programming.
Oh, you did?
Okay, I apologize.
I don't like the execution on how it doesn't fucking matter,
but I thought the workouts were great.
Okay, good.
Okay, my bad.
On behalf of a previous podcast that I said,
I would like to make a correction for the record.
Andrew Hiller did like the programming.
He doesn't like the fact that the open doesn't matter.
Yeah, thank you.
It was like yesterday, I think.
It's cool.
Thank you.
Disregard yesterday's show. Yeah no not entirely just and then on the second half with glassman yep a lot of different takes on how that went down and what happened there and um
understood at the julie jones hi dave
what i mean it's just it's mean, it's just there.
I mean, it's just the – it's going to always be the – it's the DEI.
It's the – it's just the way things are being run.
I mean, like people feel it.
Glassman's not here. It's the lack of messaging. It's just, it's just, it's just the way things are being run. I mean, like people, people feel it. It's Glassman's not here.
It's the lack of messaging.
It's just all that stuff. It's the people who work there who aren't CrossFitters.
Um, it's, it's, people feel it.
It's crazy.
Dave's there.
It is crazy.
He's there.
Hey, if there was no Dave, what the fuck are we doing?
I wonder if those people in there hate him.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah.
I wonder if he's converted
any of them. I wonder if
the people who come there...
When I started
working there, I was awoke hard.
And then I got...
Didn't Dave convert you?
He did. him and a bunch
of other people like open basically opened my eyes i mean i converted myself but oh that's kind
of how it has to work no yeah you gotta take a horse to water can't make them drink it's like
you can't bring people across that they gotta want to go you can't like force someone to start
doing it that's a losing battle.
You could,
that'd be an interesting.
Dan Guerrero.
Most people don't feel it.
Uh, they do feel it.
It's just,
it trickles.
It's trickling down really slow to them,
but I,
but,
but everyone feels it.
If you don't feel it,
it's because you're on too much Vicodin or Oxycontin.
Feel what?
Just the change,
the shift,
but I mean, all the change, the shift.
I mean, all the affiliate owners feel it.
If you've been around since 2019, if you're a new convert, you might not feel it.
Because you don't know.
Your frame of reference is now.
Right.
Oh, good point.
Good point.
And that's how this happens over the course.
That's how you lose a brand.
Yeah.
Slow migration.
There's always Schrodinger's D-bag, douchebag.
Who's that?
And how did he put that thing over the O?
I think maybe you just hold the O down on the keyboard.
There's no button for that on my keyboard.
Do you have a Mac? I do, but there's no button for that on my keyboard Do you have a Mac?
I do but there's no button for it on here I think you just hold the O down
You guys want to see
Remind me at the end
I'll show you Schrodinger's do's and don'ts
Oh nice great
Look at Kenneth DeLapp just posturing on you
Oh my god everyone's posturing on you
We just made Hiller bilingual
This is a problem
Alright I'm going to open a German channel now We just made Hiller bilingual. This is a problem. All right.
I'm going to open a German channel now.
Okay.
Here we go.
You're going to be like, I'm yelling.
Hey, Hiller. I was accidentally billed by fucking the AI software.
Opus.
No.
The one that translates to Portuguese, to all the languages five hundred dollars this month
it's that's how much it is monthly right yeah yeah for no i bought like i can't remember 600
minutes or something and i sent them an email telling them to fucking give me my money back
and cancel my subscription but if they don't you can use it um if you want and convert like 20 of
your videos to portuguese if you want because it doesn 20 of your videos to Portuguese if you want.
Because it doesn't work on my videos.
It doesn't work on my videos because I have too many people talking.
Oh, interesting.
Okay.
Totally. I've taken the level one twice now, and I'm wondering if the training department has ever considered removing the zone diet from the curriculum in favor of more generalized nutrition content.
In the nine years that I've been doing CrossFit, I haven't met a single person who does his own diet
because most find it too restrictive.
I feel like the recent talks from the CrossFit Health Summit
did a great job in describing what the current studies are
showing about what good nutrition can look like,
especially when you consider where affiliates are located,
socioeconomically speaking.
I wonder if there's more value in staying with the realm of good nutrition
without being prescripted, i.e. don't zone diet.
It would also help level one trainers to understand
what the scope of their practice is
when athletes approach them with nutrition questions.
So on that note.
He's reading faster than he used to.
Yeah, and it's at 1.25, but he is.
Even with that considered, I think, yeah.
I like how he prints them out.
He said he just prints them out a few minutes before he goes.
He says it's pretty random how he chooses them.
Do you have anything to say about that before we go on?
You want to say anything about that?
Zone diet.
Zone.
Yeah.
I'm not a fan of zone.
I mean, it works.
It works in the sense that it's like really simple.
I think that's probably why they put it in there.
And it's close to what you'd see in fitness, 100 words in the way you should eat. But I've never been a fan of it's like, hey, I think that's probably why they put it in there. And it's close to what you'd see in fitness, a hundred words in the way you should eat.
But I've never been a fan of it's like, Hey, I got to get more fat.
And like, well, what are you going to do?
I'm going to throw down a bunch of nuts.
It's one of the first talks that I had with Athena.
It's like, you talked with somebody who pushed you into paleo or sorry, zone.
And it's like, at the end of the day, you were short on your fat.
So you just ate fat for the sake
of eating fat when you're trying to lose weight it made me like lose my mind like stop doing that
you don't have to fit the zone diet like the the the it over it's interesting that you say
it's simple i always thought it was complicated but for people who don't um it's a simple it's
like a certain type of math it depends depends on who you are, I guess.
Right.
Yeah, once you learn it, you're okay.
Just so people know, the concept of the zone is to eat a –
I think it's like 40, 30, 30 in the macros.
I think it's – is it 40 protein, 30 carb, 30 fat, whatever it is.
And the point of it, of eating eating like that is to stabilize your hormones at
the end of the day it all came down to stabilizing your hormones so eat those and eat those macros
at every single meal right so that you would stabilize your hormones and if you have stable
hormones your energy system your energy levels will stay the same throughout the day and also
it's the people believe it's the best way to fight off disease, specifically things like fucking dementia, shit like that.
So that was the point of it, to just keep your insulin level just fucking cruising the whole day.
How easy would it be for them to tell people, like, don't eat sugar and you're cool?
Yeah.
Keeps your insulin level flat. yeah well but i mean i'm really interested to hear what his answer is but it's like
this was written how many years ago like 20 yeah more the 2030 because it's only probably
developed 30 years ago yeah you're writing to the to the i think about this a lot like they wrote the l1 to the crowd that existed in in 2004
when people were people were probably smarter back then i don't know not when it i we've changed the
game so much when it comes to health and fitness we're we're fighting a different battle we changed
the landscape and we're fighting a different battle now i don't know i feel like it's going
backwards um so not to lose
weight no it is to lose weight too you keep that then within the within those macros they there's
something called blocks and that's where they lose me that's got to be young jeff
anyway okay here we go hold on just checking my notes here making sure i'm in order
we so i wonder when the last time you went to the level one was because we definitely Hold on. Just checking my notes here, making sure I'm in order.
So I wonder when the last time you went to level one was, because we definitely do not talk about it in detail and as much as we used to. It has evolved to a point to where it's mentioned amongst many other protocols and options for clean eating or for recommendations.
This idea that nobody's, you don't know, you might not know a single person who does his own diet, but I know hundreds of people who've done his own diet and many who still will do it.
Hundreds who've done and many who will.
So he still doesn't know hundreds.
Want to optimize their results or see change.
And the magic with his own diet isn't the 40-30-30. precision and accuracy with which you're managing the macronutrients and how you're tweaking them to actually see results, performance results and or body composition
goals. So the zone diet is there is something to it. There is results from it. And, you know,
Matt Chan used to zone when he was when he was competing. Even Jeffrey Adler, he zones currently.
And so understand, though, that like all of them.
He zones currently. And so understand though, that like all of you, yeah, he heard that on a podcast once. I don't believe it. These people who use zone at that level are adjusting it and
modifying it and tweaking it for their needs. Even the zone diet as prescribed when I was using it,
I would get to a point where I was doubling or tripling the fat intake. So again, the zone diet
is about managing and measuring your quantity intake and optimizing it for performance.
But largely speaking, at the level one, we do recommend other protocols if you don't want to use that precision.
So if you really care about optimizing results, tracking with that precision your macronutrient intake is highly recommended.
With that precision, your macronutrient intake is highly recommended.
Yeah, let me tell you.
If you really want to optimize your results, everyone knows GoWOD.
GoWOD is the way to optimize your fucking results.
Now, I don't use it.
That's why I'm a pile of shit.
Yeah, 50% protein a day and GoWOD.
Yes.
Thank you. Yeah, GoWOD, GoWOD and GoWOD. Yes. Thank you.
GoWOD, GoWOD, GoWOD.
And if you didn't know,
GoWOD is putting up $2,500 for the quarterfinals,
Taylor Self versus the world winner.
There'll be a game.
And download the heat one up now.
Ending year of free steaks.
What? Are they?
Is GoWOD giving that away?
No.
He's manifesting it.
I'm sorry.
We're probably representing you.
We can make free stakes happen.
We can figure that out.
Dan Guerrero.
Dave thought that Adler said,
I do the zone.
When Adler said, I feel like I'm in the zone.
That's the first funny thing you've said in three years.
That was funny.
That was good.
Wow.
And he has a weird accent.
I can see how Dave messed that up.
He's Mexican.
Yeah, he's DEI.
And Adelaide is French or whatever.
Yeah.
I'd hold that over his head all the time.
I'd be like, how did you get when you do a DAI hire?
On the, if you just want a recommendation,
eat meat and vegetables, nuts and seeds,
some fruit, little starch, no sugar,
which we also teach at the seminar,
is a great starting place.
And then in between that, in between the zone precision
and the eat meat and nuts, meats and vegetables prescription,
there's a lot of other protocols that you can play with.
A majority of what we recommend is lower carb
lower carbs
than the traditional American.
Waking his ass off.
Hey dude, that's a
crazy place to fucking take a
swig. Watch that. That's a crazy
I don't know about his timing there. That's crazy.
He's getting nervous. Yeah, that's a crazy place to try
to put in a swig.
There's a lot of other
I need this drink now
A majority of what we recommend is lower carb
Are you fucking kidding me
That's not the spot to drink
It's emphasis
We don't get it because we're at 1.25 speed
This tone is all fucked up with that drink
Look at his face man
What's going on with
him he's at 1.25 hi janelle what's up girl what i like oh shit tism sip tism sip
oh that's why he's dei higher not because he's mess again you gotta ask somebody because he's slow no because
he's fast he's fast he's fast he's fast American diet and some of the protocols are low low carb
when you start talking keto or when you start talking um some of the um fasting protocols that
really reduce your carb intake so but not all of them are low, low carb.
So we don't, we're not anti-carb,
but we do have prescription
or we do recommend lower carb
than traditional American diet.
Oh God, that's not really going on.
He got lost.
He's like, I got to dig my way out.
And we've screwed up.
We got to get back on track here.
Dude, the only diet you got to follow
is you eat 50% of your calories and protein.
And then if you work out a lot, you eat a lot of carbs.
And the rest is fat.
It's easy.
And you should eat your carbs.
If you don't work out a lot, you eat iceberg lettuce until you die with the meat.
And like you said on your podcast today, it needs to either have a face or come from the ground.
Yep.
Easy.
Preferably not fried all right but if you're rolling through mcdonald's parking lot and you haven't eaten meat all day like take the
freaking meat out of the double quarter pounder and throw that crap down the hatch you don't know
how hard you made life for me whenever you guys went to popeyes and kept talking about popeyes
for about six months why did you like it like it? I fucking love Popeyes.
Yeah.
Dude, you should have seen that.
It's so good.
You should have seen the people who work there, dude.
I was not too cool.
And the patrons.
The combined IQ of everyone in the building
was half of my IQ.
I have an IQ of 74. Dude dude they look like monsters dude they look like
um like monsters care they look like characters it looked like fucking halloween in there i'm
not even joking like a makeup artist had come in there and doctored everyone up
when we what's crazy was all white people who work there and all black people in there
and when i mean white people I'm using that term loosely.
The people term, not the white part.
That were working there?
Yeah.
It was fucking...
Dude, it was like Special Olympics Day there, working there.
It was bizarre.
Where was this?
Hiller?
Roadside Popeyes.
In between Illinois and Wisconsin, somewhere.
Okay.
You could tell three of the people there it was like their first day.
It was weird.
This is like
pool bar as well.
Remember that? It was like a bunch of pool tables
off to the side. It was weird.
The parking lot could
hold 1,000
cars and there were like six cars in the parking
lot. I'm not joking. The biggest
fucking parking lot you've ever seen. The place could sit 300 people and it was just like us eight of us yeah like
we saw that video of sporty beth eating popeyes and i'm like hey dude let's get some little
sporty beth's eating influencer hey but the food was amazing the food was so good. You'll go to sleep for three days, though.
I probably ate a cat.
I probably ate a cat.
He just messed up his zone talk there.
Oh, shit.
So last week I went to Boulder, so here's the weekend review.
Okay.
Low, low carb.
So we're not anti-carb,
but we do have prescription or we do recommend lower carb than the traditional American diet.
Okay. He's all fucked up. Did I get through them all? I guess I did.
So last week I went to Boulder. So here's the weekend review because this guy said I didn't do a weekend review. Last week I went to Boulder, spent a few days there. It was a good quick trip.
Had a couple days of meetings with different teams within CrossFit
and got a lot accomplished.
Why Boulder?
Who's in Boulder?
Rosa.
Oh, hey, Carol.
Nicole Carroll's in Boulder.
Rosa doesn't work there anymore.
He got fired.
Isn't he on like that table or whatever? Oh, I don't know. The board't work there anymore. He got fired. Isn't he on that table or whatever?
Oh, I don't know.
The board?
Oh, look, Patrick Rios.
I'm in.
Yeah, but you got fired.
Yeah, but he got fired.
Yeah, okay.
Wow.
Come to see Patrick?
California's most educated and wealthy libs are in Boulder.
That's true. Okay. I wonder why libs are in Boulder. That's true.
Okay.
I wonder why he would go to Boulder.
Nice restaurant in Boulder.
I've drawn a blank on the name.
Had a good dinner.
And so good trip, quick trip.
Actually didn't work out during that trip.
I got up at like 3.30 to make my flight that first morning,
and then I just kind of felt behind the curve on rest. And then so it didn't work out that day that I traveled. The next
morning, it didn't work out. I was supposed to go in with James Hobart and some of the people from
our team, but the last minute bailed, which is unlike me, but I've been training a lot and felt
like I needed the rest. So it didn't work out for the two days I was there. I came back and then
jumped back on the main site bandwagon that I'm really enjoying right now. We've partnered with the Murph Challenge, which is pretty cool, and a number of years in the making,
and kind of silly that we hadn't been working with them previously.
And so the Murph Challenge, every year they put on a big event where people do.
Would you consider Murph a CrossFit workout?
I think Dave's on record saying no particular workout is a CrossFit workout.
I would say it's a CrossFit workout.
We made that workout famous.
Who?
We made that workout famous.
I don't even think there would be a Murph if Greg wouldn't have developed CrossFit,
is what I'm saying.
Sure.
Agreed.
And then on top of that, what Tyler said,
the people who mostly do Murph are CrossFitters.
Don't you remember the one time Dave was talking about how you can't determine a workout, whether or not a one-off workout can't be a CrossFit workout?
It's like it's got to be done, kind of, and it can glomerate.
So I guess what you're doing tomorrow and the next day and the next day, and then all of a sudden you can start to see whether or not you're following a CrossFit program.
So there's no such thing as a CrossFit workout.
Okay, let me, let me, yeah, yeah but they all know the answer to this um what is the murph crossfit hero workout yeah it's a hero workout i want to see do they
still have a list we used to have a hero uh a list of uh so if you do jackie every day you're
not doing crossfit right because you got to do some sort
of a lift you got to do some sort of a gymnastics but it's still crossfit workout like look at this
this is from a thursday uh may 8th 2018 i mean it's a hero workout i'm not arguing that totally
is and i think you're right as well if there was no Greg, there's no Murph workout.
Yeah.
At least not the way we know it today.
Like Lieutenant Murphy did that shit all the time.
But he was a CrossFitter.
Was he?
When did he pass?
He was a CrossFitter, question mark.
I like that you backed out of that question mark I heard the question mark the first time
oh thank you
Tyler didn't, that's because you have an ism
Tyler doesn't have an ism so he doesn't catch those things
he doesn't have that super power
okay here we go
they donate money to the Murph Challenge
to support the Michael Murphy Foundation. And you buy a t-shirt and there's a leaderboard. And the
Murph Challenge does a really good job of getting it outside of just the CrossFit community. And so
they've done a good job of really getting even people like Chris Pratt and other famous people
to participate. And it's been kind of silly that we haven't been aligned with them up until
this point.
So we worked on that,
had a number of calls with their leadership and were able to set something up
to where now.
Listen,
listen,
what this guy says,
the Ridgeline realtor in the range regiment,
we did CrossFit before it was CrossFit.
Same,
same.
But Hey,
I could say that Bill Grunler was doing CrossFit with the not Petaluma,
wherever the fuck he was.
He was the fire captain.
Pismo Beach Fire Department before there was CrossFit.
But it wasn't CrossFit.
It's just a beatdown.
Hell yeah.
Lieutenant Murphy died in 2005.
Thank you.
Sevan is the name of the 10-minute
assault bike workout. Yeah, I agree. It should be. Thank you. Sevan is the name of the 10-minute assault bike workout.
Yeah, I agree. It should be.
Thank you.
CrossFit is involved with the
Murph Challenge, and I'm really proud of that.
It's a noble cause, obviously, to support,
and Murph is such a
great workout. Murph was a great soldier
and a great sailor and a hero,
obviously, for the ultimate
sacrifice that he made. But being aligned with it, I'm excited. So if you're an affiliate owner
and you want to host Murph at your box, check out Murph Challenge and see how you can be
an official host for the Murph Challenge. And like I said, CrossFit, we're now aligned with it
and working with it. We also, our programming team, our cap team.
Did you write, did you, Ridgeline, did you write your scores on a board?
Was it constantly varied?
Was there a clock?
Yeah.
Did you do it with your less lonely community?
Together, a six-week training cycle for it.
So I think it's geared for all levels.
But if you want something to prepare you for the Murph Challenge
or for Murph, the workout, they're starting to advertise it,
and we will start to advertise it soon, so check that out.
But anyways, I'm really happy that we're aligned with them.
Maybe you guys should just advertise the semifinals.
You guys thought about that instead of advertising the Murph Challenge?
I have an idea.
Just advertise the semifinals.
I heard Murph is going to be the first event on Friday at the semifinals.
Did you?
No.
Oh.
He heard a rumor.
I heard a rumor.
He started.
That would be hard to film.
It'd be hard to see, right?
It'd be hard to do in a small arena.
Did you really hear that?
Yeah.
Wow, that would be fucking awesome.
That's why Dave's talking about it right now.
Oh.
I wonder if we'll get to watch.
Yeah, on Friday.
Maybe, if Chase is there.
Didn't you say yesterday you're doing that?
I put in a proposal to film Friday.
Isn't there a house and everything?
You said that yesterday.
You said Sarah got everyone a house.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm excited.
I'm going to Carson and Knoxville. I'm 90% going to Knoxville. You're going to go to Knoxville I'm 90% going to Knoxville
You're going to go to Knoxville?
I do not want to fly
I do not want to fly on a Boeing
Jesus you're a pussy
It's true
So what's going to happen
The plane goes down
Yeah
And then you're dead
Like what's the big deal
You don't even know
I know
But I want to hang out with my boys for a little bit
Oh okay Well you won't even know i know but i want to hang out with my boys for a little bit oh okay well you won't even know of course that's true i was gonna name a bike workout
you'll be good you'll be gone good you can carpool with me i know hey dude let me tell you i i'm i'm
it's not out of the question i would drive straight from la. And that ratchet as minivan you didn't want to fix.
No,
no,
no.
And a ratchet ass.
I have to look at you.
Urban dictionary.
Later this year,
we're also still working with Chad and the Chad,
the simple foundation.
So excited about that.
So,
and then the final thing I wanted to say,
let me see,
actually had some other notes that just bled into this.
Quarterfinals.
Quarterfinals are this week.
The workouts will be released in the next couple days.
And so really exciting.
I'm excited.
There's a whole campaign around Beat Dave, apparently, that the marketing team built.
So if you beat me on individual workouts, which a majority of the people in the quarterfinals will beat me at a majority of the workout based on the fact that like we took 70, we took 25%. Like I'm on that
bottom. So pretty much everyone in there is a better than I am. So it will be fun. I'm excited
about it. Still time to sign up. Um, you can actually sign up all the way until it closes,
I think on Monday. So register for quarterfinals. I can't sign on the leaderboard. All right. Thanks a lot.
I'll let you have my spot.
Hey,
Jeffrey's been doing CrossFit forever.
Constantly varied functional movement,
executed high intensity hauling hay all day.
When I was younger, there was a clock damn right from the field of the barn before dark.
But did you write it on a board and were you alone?
Cause if it was,
you won't cross it.
There isn't a clock when you're moving hay,
but it feels like there is.
Cause the,
the trailer's always moving.
So you have to go.
And so you're like the whole time you're like,
Oh shit.
Oh shit.
Oh shit.
I love bailing.
Hey,
uh,
Seema,
uh,
turning to John Madden.
Probably most of you don't know who that is.
Won't fly. Can't talk talk Doesn't know anything about football
That's good
I'm going to give Sevan a boogie when I see him in Knoxville
You probably should not
Sevan are you going to do the quarterfinal workouts?
You should probably not do that
For your health and safety
I'm telling you I don't know It doesn't matter Quarterfinal workouts? You should probably not do that for your health and safety.
I'm telling you.
I don't know.
No, it doesn't matter.
Sounds bad.
A boogie in Knoxville is not what you want to get.
Oh, a noogie.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, a noogie. I hate those.
I hate all that shit.
Titty twisters, noogies, wet willies.
They're kind of like a sack tap.
If somebody gives you a noogie, it's disrespectful.
It's such frat boy tool shit.
You ever had an oil change?
What's an oil change?
Sounds like some Taylor Self-made.
It's a wrestler thing.
It's like you come up with your finger and you stick it in their butthole.
Oh, yeah.
I need you to go to uh crash because you have to
teach me how to not die when i wrestle colton oh yeah i can do that i think i'm screwed i only have
to last 30 seconds you're screwed i can make it 30 seconds right um yeah yeah okay all right did right? Yeah. Okay. Did you wrestle in high school?
No. I played football, though.
Oh, you're fucked.
Hey, do you know about this company?
Colton.
Do you know about this company, Hiller?
Nothing can save you.
I don't know.
It's me in the comments.
This sugar here,
I was talking about it this morning
alolos alolos alolos alolos alolos anyway and and afterwards i was talking about my wife said that
um when she makes stuff for the kids she uses that no way like if she makes bad shit for the kids That's the sugar substitute she uses RX sugar
And so
Do you have it? Have you tried it?
I ate one of
I ate something today from them
And it was so
Now the thing is I hadn't eaten in 36 hours
And it was the first thing I ate
And it was
God I can't find it
Did it taste like sucralose
No dude what's crazy
What's so much better about this than the other sugars
Is it said it's 70% as sweet
As regular sugar
And that's what was so awesome about it
It wasn't over the top
I ate this
I ate one of these
What is it
It's a mint brownie log.
It looks like a deuce.
It does look like that.
Dude, it was so good.
Can I see the nutrition facts?
Is that on one of those pictures?
What is it sweetened with?
Zero stevia, zero sugar alcohol, zero monk fruit, zero...
It's whatever this...
I'm going to have someone on to talk to me about this ingredient
it's like cock so that's good i'm gonna have someone on from this company i think
anything sweet with monk fruit makes it taste worse than where it started
what's in it hold on how do i how do let me see if i oh here go to the pictures yeah
yeah is there a zoom feature on there? Oh, yeah.
Dark chocolate.
Dark chocolate.
That aloes.
Whatever.
Chocolate, cocoa butter, cocoa powder.
Sunflower.
Soluble tapioca fiber.
At least it's not sunflower oil.
Then more aloes.
Cocoa butter.
Proprietary vegan protein. I don't know what that is pea pumpkin sunflower flax cocoa powder natural flavor salt there's nothing in it fruit is bitter as
butt but if you like it that's cool people like butt dude yeah i want someone else to try this
and see if i'll try a log yeah dear rx sugar send those and i'll eat them someone needs to try this and see if i'll try a log yeah dear rx sugar send those and i'll eat them
someone needs to try uh try this besides me i cannot believe how good it is
i'm on day two of doing meat and fruit again oh how's that i'm starting trying to get are you
trying to get like you're starving as i said yeah are you trying to get like take are you trying to
get fancy for um uh because you going to see a bunch of people
at semifinals? Are you trying to tighten your shit?
Not necessarily, but I am tired of being
poofy. If I don't watch
the amount of carbs I eat, I kind of balloon up
like a water buffalo.
I say I'm a water buffalo.
I don't like it.
You don't look poofy.
Allulose is a naturally occurring sugar found in figs, raisins, wheat, maple syrup, and molasses.
Thanks, Bernie.
Oh.
Allulose.
Allulose.
Where do you see someone doing allulose?
Oh.
Hey, that's my guy.
That's my house.
That is your house?
Yeah.
Is that your spray-painted bush?
No, that's a real tree. that one never died on me nice uh allulose is a rare sugar that naturally occurs in fruits like figs and raisins
oh okay uh also known as d allulose or simply allulose is low calorie epimer of the monosaccharide
sugar fructose used by some major commercial food and beverage.
Jesus Christ.
Hey, someone need to have Greg on.
And when Greg's on next, ask him about this,
and he'll tell you whether or not it's good in four seconds.
I wonder if Spade sweetens their stuff with allulose.
They do?
I'm wondering.
Have you tried that yet, the Spade?
No. I ordered the Dr. Pepper
and I'm freaking out that it's not here
yet
is it good have you had it
no I'm dying to try it too
I think JR has a bunch of
flavors and that's probably the main
reason I'm going to crash
to drink spade
oh Jake Johnson how is this book a 4.1 star And that's probably the main reason I'm going to crash. To drink spade. Oh, Dick Johnson.
Yeah, so this, how is this book a 4.1 star?
I read this.
This guy I heard is an allulose expert.
And I read this book.
Greg told me to read this book.
And this book actually kind of changed my life.
It's pretty fucking crazy.
The fat switch.
Yeah.
If you're into mitochondria talk, you will love this book.
I hate that book. The powerhouse of the cell uh in a nutshell this is what he's uncovered from decades of research those of us
who are obese eat more because of faulty switch and exercise is less because of low energy state
if you can learn how to control a specific switch located in the powerhouse of each cell the
mitochondria you hold the key to fighting obesity it's a it's a
it's a great book it goes into like the different ways you metabolize all the different kinds of
sugars anyway this guy's a proponent of the allulose he likes allulose anyway so i'm going
to get him on the and he's got a new book out okay please get dick johnson on the podcast. I'm going to. Yeah.
Yeah, it is kind of a big dick move.
Where is... I should get this guy on too, Robert Lustig.
What's he do?
He's a professor.
He's like the foremost expert
on sugar in the world, I think.
He's a professor at UC San Francisco.
I think I've heard that.
Biggest pros are that allulose tastes like sugar,
but doesn't affect your blood glucose or insulin.
Dr. Dick Dick.
Dick Dick.
Oh, no. oh no
once again guys
heat one app
easy 2500 bucks
easiest 2500 bucks you've ever made
easier than the 3500 bucks
Tim Murray made easiest 2500 bucks
anyone's made
I don't know
Will's pretty
good or oh you mean will you think will's gonna take the money he's scaring the shit out of me i
think if he wins again we get problems hey what's crazy is it's the biggest prize for up to date for
the heat one app and check this out um uh it's less money so that i think i think we're gonna
have to have jr on wednesday but i think the prize money for the quarterfinals is
$5,000, $2,000, $1,000, $1,000.
It's more money than three of the
athletes will make.
Can they play?
Yeah.
What if they're just like,
oh, I guess you don't get any points for losing
by throwing it, right?
You can't win
per event, so it doesn't benefit
on to throw an event got it how many people do you think pivot from this show to porn
like it's late like it's 11 like it's 11 o'clock at night the show's over you grab your iphone
you think anybody like is watching and all of a sudden they start watching
porn and then come back i mean i think you could you could insert porn anywhere and yes they someone
did it if we were in the background i would just have it on people watch it while they watch us
i i i had a friend in college who um would basically only have sex with his girlfriend
while they were watching porn and they and so that what they would but back then there were
no cell phones and so they would lock the doors to like the house and we would you know and i
lived in a college town so they would lock the door to the house and pull the curtains and bone
in the living room but while they watch porn i'm making assumptions about this person you know why like that it's me no no no no i'm
stereotyping in my head a white white couple okay in their 20s straight straight edge didn't didn't
smoke weed drink drank a lot was into cocaine both of them into cocaine. Both of them into cocaine. How do you get into that habit?
I don't know, but once you start.
Watching porn?
Well, doing that while also having sex.
What are they spending more time looking at?
Hey, dude.
That's too much.
Nowadays, you just have your iPhone like this.
Right.
I wonder if Steve Jobs knew that.
That's too much stimulation.
I wonder if Steve Jobs knew that.
That's the thing, though.
They probably need that amount of stimulation.
They're so overstimulated, they need more.
Hey, when I have music on and I'm working out really hard,
I get overstimulated by the music.
And I have to turn the music down.
And Dave's a week in review next week.
I'm going to ask him if he's used his Apple vision pros to watch porn yet he took him back he took him back oh he did
after he did that there's no way that would have been such a good answer how he reads them off the
list it's like dave have you watched porn on your apple but still ask him that but still ask him that, but still ask him that. Okay. Maybe ask him, can you watch porn?
Okay.
Yeah.
He's not confirming it, but I think.
Right.
Will Brandstetter, Tyler stereotyping in his head.
Shocker.
What did you say about music before that, Simon?
If I'm like working out really fucking um and there's music on i'll
get overstimulated by it i have to turn it off oh that's never happened to you like it just starts
getting too loud and too intense and i have to turn it off i have to do a lexus every day yeah
i'm just like i'm overwhelmed i'm i'm i'm working on music yeah not loud at the end
most of my life i didn't work out to music. Not loud at the end. Most of my life, I didn't work out to music.
There are times where it's like I go through
phases where I listen to podcasts
and work out, but then other times I only
want to listen to music.
Do you ever listen to like Rogan and
Train? No, I listen to Andrew
Hiller and Train. That's
true.
It has to be stuff that I can just listen to while I'm in the zone 1.5. I do zone 1.5 training.
Not even 2.
Not even 2. Zone 2 training.
That's the trick.
Scott Morgan, to answer your question, I'm not saying the affiliates are dwindling.
They're saying the affiliates are dwindling.
Did you see that in the video today?
I did.
I watched today's video.
There were two separate instances where it was Jenna Hookah, the new CMO, put out the first thing she ever said.
It's like 12,000 affiliates.
And I'm like, oh, that's a weird typo. And then they sent out that survey that also said 12 000 affiliates and i'm like so they're doing more than incidents 12 000 yeah
but for freaking never it was 13 and now it's 12 and then at some point it's gonna be 11
i'm not i'm not saying shit they are this question is so funny to me what does dave
say about hillar saying stuff that's a good question it is a good question
write that hey go write that go go write that in the uh word for word right but yeah no dave
what do you say about hiller saying this or what do you say about hiller quoting Jenna Hawka about the dwindling affiliates? Oh, yeah.
It is weird.
Hey, she can double the 285 for 10.
Who?
Jenna.
No shit?
I actually responded to her story the other day.
She put up a story of her doubling 285, and she said she's been doing CrossFit for X amount of time.
It wasn't anything long, but now she's doing it for 10
after having
been doing crossfit for six to eight months she's probably on something for sure juice california
peptides yeah i ain't hating yeah good for her wow i'm gonna do that tomorrow you didn't respond to
me california peptide she didn't no no 285 for 10 and i was just like that's great
and she didn't say anything joe rogan barely asked questions anymore what's he do he just
what do they do i don't know that's true apparently tyler watches him what does he do
i've not noticed any difference in his podcast in the last seven years.
So I guess he never asked questions.
Yeah.
It's just never asked.
Uh,
so you,
she,
she,
I want to see that.
She did.
She,
does she show her,
does she show her story?
Let's see if I can still see it.
It's cold.
Perfect. For those of you guys missed it earlier in the show uh dylan pepper said um uh haven't been able to
sleep lately the pressure of facing these three live all weekend has just been too much for me
i'm sure it's going to be very close race yeah i i just said, whoa. Jason Hopson.
Can't say anything.
It was a story.
God, the thumb one.
The thumb one is offensive.
Like these other two are just like, okay, I see the Photoshop,
but the thumb one is like, dude, is that really him?
Is that what he looks like naked?
I'm just glad somebody,
they're laying off of John Young with the sloth for a little while.
With the what?
Too close to home?
No,
it's just somebody else needed a turn.
God.
Oh,
with Coleman Hughes, he just talks at the guy. He went 17 minutes without asking a question
to Coleman Hughes.
It's his show.
Savon's not done the same thing.
I have a
16 minute cutoff.
Seven for Savon minutes.
Longest running
monologue.
By who? Savon. What's the longest one i did yeah
the other day brook ends put you in a hole it was awesome you're like
oh yeah yeah i i call that turning into metal mario you were just like what the fuck is going on she was just like
you know what you know what's wild too about that is um i'm not gonna get into it here but yeah
well she had a lot to say so i was gonna sit back i was gonna say something about you know
you're in for it you're like here we go yeah i was like sometimes i'll do that too i'll just be
like you know what i'm just gonna chill to chill. And I look at the clock.
I'm like, I'm going to let this go.
You're not going to work for this.
Yeah, this is cool.
I enjoyed having her on.
But it's so funny that the comments are just –
when I read comments sometimes, I'm like,
are these people watching the same show that I was on?
It is weird.
What the fuck did these people just see?
Things that the viewers pick up like when
you're in a show for some reason it's just a totally different experience yeah it's hey and
you know what else sucks is so like this morning on my show i got into a fight with like the the
audience a little bit but but it's 300 to one yeah and you can't win because they all know me
so well like they know shit about me i don't even know like sema will just fuck me up like she's like oh yeah she's like oh mr nuances
oh details shmeetails i'm like damn fuck she just KO'd my shit she just made me look like a hypocrite
what can i show you something I think you'd really,
I think it'd be really cool in your background.
Okay, what?
It's a live Instagram counter.
Oh, I would love that, dude.
I think if you put on that shelf back there,
it looks up to your Wi-Fi and it just counts.
Oh my God. How many followers you have?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Dude, I would love.
Like watch it.
It'd be so cool. Dude would love hey should i get this
how much is the seven digit one wait uh it's an extra it's 512 can i see that can you bring it
back up i want to see what it looks like you know why it's so funny so funny because i just have so
few instagram followers i've actually seen one of these in person And for some reason I came across it
And now I'm getting blasted by it
Everywhere marketing
Which one would I get the 7 one
Just to make just so it looks even more ridiculous
Yeah probably
And if you get your money back
From that Spanish website or Portuguese
Website you can just go get this
Oh yeah that's true
And where would I put it back there where Dave's
Oils are just like right
there yeah and then people can just like watch it move around the whole show it's too bad we didn't
have it for the main account whenever that started to die just watch it go down every week uh-huh
they don't have one for youtube it kind of makes me upset i would have gotten it immediately for
youtube oh i'm i guarantee you can find a guy to reprogram hey
they do oh that god one thing is they have this custom counter thing in there but it's
not damn tyler you know shit i just know that shit exists and i'll go find somebody that can
do it how do you think he won't exist i didn't program that shit good point all right i'll get
one of those i think you're right.
I think it would be pretty funny.
It would be awesome.
And I'll set the chocolate dick on it.
Yeah.
Alright.
Yeah, just put it on that shelf.
That'll be great.
Jeffrey Birdshield.
When I retire, I'm going to do a Stefan Review podcast. That'll be great. Jeffrey Birdschild. I'm going to do a Stefan Review podcast.
That'll be good.
I just don't have a shelf behind me.
Sousa's got that shelf he put up.
It would go good on his.
I don't have something like that.
How long is olive oil good for?
This has been sitting out.
I've had this thing for like two months now.
Fats don't.
It takes a long time for fat to spoil thank you tdc mercantile.com tdc mercantile
rambler told me he's addicted to uh tdc's olive oil do we know who rambler is? I don't. I don't know who anybody is. I think Pedro knows.
Do you know if Rambler's a boy or a girl?
I think it's a dude.
And you think he's under 25?
I don't know.
I do.
I'm not going to stereotype Rambler.
What's that?
I bet it's a dude.
One of the first gifts I ever got was from andrew yeah i think it's a white dude it's a white chocolate dick that's what happens to us black
dudes we we as we get older we get whiter i don't know good yeah yeah it's good. Yeah. Yeah, it's good.
And I, you know, maybe
I should take a bite out of it.
I think you should smoke the weed.
I think you should drill out. Oh, that'd be
great. And smoke the weed out of it.
Hey, Sevan doesn't know how to use a drill
though, dude. Someone got me
this too. Someone sent this to my house.
Yeah, that thing's cool.
Tupac. I remember that.
Oh, I thought that was
who's the dude you're obsessed with?
Little Doggy?
Who's the dude who's going through all this shit right now?
That rapper dude. Oh, he did it.
He did it. Little Doggy.
That's how
much I know about him.
Then I have this up. Don't forget
about this. Rad Star sponsored athlete. And then I have this up. Don't forget about this.
Rad Star Sponsored Athlete.
Oh, you love rads. Here.
I got my
Patrick Vellner one back there.
Let's see, where?
It's like between these computer
monitors over here.
I think Pat's the only one.
Hey, do they still sell? Does Wad Zombie sell any of this stuff anymore? They're getting ready to Pat's the only one. Hey, do they still sell?
Does Wad Zombie sell any of this stuff anymore?
They're getting ready to come out with another one.
Oh, who? Do you know?
Can neither confirm
nor deny. Is it a boy or a girl?
Boy.
Oh, no shit.
Does he still sell them?
Yeah.
Go to
minttradingcards.com
I think you can also get them on
Wadzombies
platform
or T you can program this to do
YouTube counting
see I told you
no no no there's something
here I'm pulling it up look at this thing
he sent me this thing
and uh sorry Wadzombie you were about to get some free love but you got whacked uh my bad Here, I'm pulling it up. Look at this thing. He sent me this thing.
Sorry, Wadzombie.
You were about to get some free love, but you got whacked.
My bad.
No, it's fine.
That's not as cool, though,
as the other wooden thing.
I don't think that's as cool.
Wait, let me see that thing again.
Oh, you just went to Amazon and you typed in
Instagram or YouTube counter? Oh, and then just went to Amazon and you typed in Instagram.
Oh, no.
YouTube counter.
Oh, and then there's a way where you can convert it.
Some Mexican who teaches you how to do it.
Always.
Instagram counter.
Smurl.
Let's see.
Just like you.
Oh, you can buy the Instagram counter to on Amazon. He's not kidding
This thing's all digital though
Look at that. Oh, okay. This is cool
The other ones a little neater, but yeah, it's cool
Some of the worst I've experienced they sent a defective unit and I asked to get a replacement ASAP for our restaurant opening before they picked up the defective one.
Fast forward 10 days later and the defective one was picked up and we still haven't even been shipped our new one.
Restaurant opens today.
So what? Quit being a bitch.
It just didn't work yesterday.
Even we unplug and plug an outlet following instructions on the website.
Learn how to fucking read and write.
This is a oh yeah so
there's four there's four one star uh reviews setting this thing up is a nightmare it's worse
than one of those older printers that doesn't quite know how to deal with the internet yet
videos are shot to the left of useless as well a how-to video that is so modern that it doesn't
even reference the exact buttons or look anything like the device. Oh, shit.
Okay.
Unless you have
a bunch of followers,
it seems like a bad idea.
I think it's better
if I don't have any, right?
For you, it's funny.
I won't name names, but there was a website that's funny. But like, I won't name names,
but there was a website that had a counter on it and it just proved that no one cared.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I remember that website.
That was bad.
Was that Brian's?
Heller.
What?
It was fucking Christ, dude.
Yes, it was.
I mean, what?
We're clearly trying like not say it oh like it's pretty odd it wasn't like i forgot no it wasn't like we forgot it wasn't like we
forgot that's the tisms coming out we weren't like what's that movie what's that movie
wasn't like that that's how i heard let me help you guys
yeah that's how i heard it oh god i haven't been on this website in a little bit oh shit listen to
this review god people are such fucking losers i will tell you that it does cause me anxiety from
time to time if i don't see it move meaning like that sounds like a penis
me no no no meaning it's talking about the instagram counter meaning he's got that thing
but he's not putting on followers so it's stressing out hey it's the same thing as a
crossfit clock you can either use it as inspiration or inspiration to quit right right
i would love that there's one so that you can get the custom one on that website
and turn into youtube but it only goes by the hundreds i don't really care to see by the
hundreds but by the people would be sweet yeah for some reason the way it hooks up to the youtube
it doesn't work right this actually came up the other day and i know Sevan is not going to like me saying it but I can't remember why
we cancelled Bidussi
oh
because my mom I know you can use the word
I can't my mom doesn't like that word
oh okay we're good
and I stopped using libtard because when I
said it I was feeling like
very aggressive and angry
and then I transcended that and now I can use the word
again
you can transcend B i'll see that
no because my mom doesn't like it it's my mom that doesn't like it and i and i just i'm not
a free man i'm still under the thumb of my uh the patriarch here what do you call i feel that
so much matriarchy whatever the whatever the mom the mom thing whatever if your mom rules you mama's boy
i'm still mama's boy oh my dad'll snap it like even at 32 my dad'll snap at me sometimes and
it's like you're like oh i'm well past that i'm grown now and i'll be like oh shit like tail
between my legs like kind of thing dude so today right right before i just finished my workout i
was going to shower before I came on the show.
And I hear my boys in the house.
And I hear my boy Ari say to one of my other boys, God, you're a pussy.
So I'm like, all right, boys, come in here.
And they're like, yeah.
And I'm like, you know your grandmother's in the house, right?
And they're like, yeah.
And I'm like, and I heard one of you call the other one a pussy and they all they both point to all right it doesn't matter who said it 60 60 uh 60 pull-ups
each so they do 60 for tattling 60 strict pull-ups each i gave them the little the little counters
they each get their own little counter like do a few click click click do a few click click click
my mom comes in there my mom my mom i to smack my mom around a little bit for this.
My mom comes, I'm like, did you guys tell your grandma,
you think that was too aggressive, say about my mom.
My mom comes in there and I'm like, boy, say sorry to Medzimayik.
That means grandmother in Armenian.
And then my mom's like, they're like, sorry, Medzimayik.
And they love her.
And she's like, I don't want you to use those, that word in front of me.
I'm like, motherfucker.
Like they already said, sorry, just tell them like, oh, I love you boys want you to use those with that word in front of me i'm like motherfucker like they already said sorry just tell them like oh i love you boys thank you
for not using that word friend she piles on listen their dad's kicking the shit out of him right now
what are you doing piling on i kind of like it you like it that my mom piled on yeah what do they do
they didn't it didn't affect them at all but i i
just like to do good i like to do good cop bad cop i like it like like i went to home depot with
the boys today and they're like can we buy cactuses i'm like no my mom's like you can get one that's
i like that you know what i mean they gotta one day my grandpa like yelled at me and i'm looking
at him like i don't listen to you oh did you say that to him yeah i'm like me and I'm looking at him like, I don't listen to you.
Oh, did you say that to him?
Yeah.
I'm like, I'm like, I was like doing something.
I don't know what it was like the middle of the summer.
I had plans and he's like, you got it.
And I'm like, my dad said it was cool.
So I'm going to do what he said was cool.
I was wondering how the boys reacted to your mom after you had made them do pull ups.
I'm like, what did they do?
No, they were, they respect this shit. I hate it when my mother-in-law does that they respect the shit out of my mom my mom spent so much time with them
but oh hey tyler i wanted to show you this real quick um this is what i was um
this this is what i see this thing It's basically
It's basically a stick
And then you can put a road mic in it
And then you can clip another road mic
To yourself
And then just hold your
And then the receiver onto the iPhone
And you can walk up to people and interview them
At semi-finals
And just bomb the heat
Make reels post And bomb the heat one make reels post real post
and bomb the heat one app with like fucking a reel every fucking 12 minutes i was thinking about
the logistics of trying to hold my phone and that thing at the same time no no you could you could
hand i can get somebody else to do it or hand it to them just hand it to them i mean and you and
you'll have a clip on and you're just like hey, how did it feel losing to Colton in this workout?
And they're like, fuck you.
You're like, thank you.
And then just post it.
You know what I mean?
My brain immediately went to, oh, I can just mount my phone on one of those headlamp mounts so that I don't have to hold it.
And then I thought about how ridiculous it would look if i was interviewing
with somebody with a headlamp like my phone is a headlamp and you could what's crazy too is you
could probably even hit like well probably not i was gonna say the medical glasses oh it streams
the instagram where the meta has them the the cell service there though is going to be so bad with all those people
streaming is going to be a problem yeah you get a starlink and the meta glasses
these are cheap i'll order one i wonder if they go with that you're right and then and then
basically you could post so many reels and you could just take over like the heat one app will become just a hub for just instant,
like,
uh,
updates on what's going on.
A porn hub.
Yeah.
Porn hub,
a hub,
porn,
CrossFit,
porn hub.
We'll work on the name.
That's domain.
Yeah.
I worked at CrossFit,
porn hub.
All right,
everyone.
Thanks for staying up so late,
Tyler.
It's midnight. Yeah. You got, you have real, you have a real job, righthub.com. All right, everyone. Thanks for staying up so late, Tyler. It's midnight?
Yeah. You have a real
job, right? Yeah. Sorry.
Still.
We're getting there.
Hiller and I can tell you how it is over here on this other side.
Better?
Dude, it's awesome.
Love you guys. See you guys tomorrow at 7am.
I don't know who's coming on the show tomorrow at 7am,
but I need someone to come on. Tomorrow, the hype train begins. Talk to you guys soon. Bye-bye. Oh, guys tomorrow at 7am. I don't know who's coming on the show tomorrow at 7am, but I need someone to come on. Tomorrow the hype train begins.
Talk to you guys soon. Bye-bye.
Oh, I invited Dallin. I wonder if he's coming.
He better.
Okay, bye.