The Sloppy Boys - 103. Toronto
Episode Date: October 7, 2022The guys make an Old Fashioned-esque drink starring their favorite Italian digestif.TORONTO RECIPE2oz/60ml Canadian Rye Whiskey.25oz/7ml Fernet-Branca.25oz/7ml Simple Syrup2 dashes Angostura BittersAd...d ingredients into a mixing glass with ice and stir until well-chilled. Strain into a chilled couple glass and garnish with an orange twist.Recipe via Liquor.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys, where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love.
I'm Jeff Dutton, along with Mike Hanford.
What up?
And Tim Kalpakis.
What is up north of the border, stylies?
Ooh, and we are your hosts of the third best comedy podcast on planet Earth.
And the podcast that just got...
No!
A fourth pay pig.
Fourth? I missed the third.
We got four oinkers?
Elliot and Dustin have joined Matt and Sean
in the sty. Wow.
Oh my god.
For those who don't know our patreon uh behind the
paywall subscription-based sloppy boys episodes we have three tiers slophead big money hustler
and then if you pay a hundred those are five and ten dollars. And then if you pay $100 a month for no additional perks,
you're a little pay pig.
You're a messy, muddy, little pink piggy.
Yes, and you oink, oink at the feet of your three goddesses.
And I thought we were maybe not mentioning.
I guess they get one mention when they join the sty.
Yeah, I don't know.
I was just excited about it and wanted to say something about it and play the sound maybe saying their name
ruins their kink and now they can't get off but i do like um i like knowing that this that our
little sty is filling up oh so nicely yeah yeah uh it's some financial domination here on the show
and um we can see all of you uh freeloader main feed listeners becoming happy little squeaky little piggies.
That's an amazing statement, Jeff.
People don't realize we could see all of them doing that.
Everyone, if you think that that's what's holding you back, let's say you listen to this show for free on your phone and you don't ever pay us anything.
You think, oh, I couldn't be a slop head or a big money hustler, let alone a pay pig.
I couldn't help these guys pay for the bandwidth they use every week.
We see it in you.
We see that potential.
It's there.
You just need to realize it.
Yeah, we're still sort of in the red on the bandwidth, right, guys?
Oh, yeah, big time.
Speaking of sties, my two friends and my friendly listeners.
So I have announced to you two that I am not drinking the drink today.
Right.
Because you didn't feel well?
I'm not feeling great.
I think a lot of what happened is it all, the tour and this past weekend, all just kind of caught up to me.
And the wave crashed and it's left me in a state of, you know, I was at my brother and sister-in-law's house last night.
And I had two glasses of wine at dinner.
And I hadn't had wine.
And I woke up this morning with such like a wine hangover.
I was like, God damn it.
And then I'm just feeling down in the health dumps.
You know when you got one of those things where it's, oh, the reason I brought up Stye,
you might not be able to see this on the Zoom.
I got an eye Stye right now.
Let's see it.
Lean in.
What, have you been just rubbing it too much?
Oh, yeah.
Stye guy.
It's a little puffy pink.
Hashtag Stye guy, baby.
Stye guy gets in there.
I think it's like maybe you get like some like, maybe I put some like sunscreen lotion on and it got in my eye.
I don't know what it is.
I mean, it's so annoying.
You can say, hey, I got to not rub this, but why?
Oh, does it feel so good to rub, huh?
Actually, it doesn't really.
It kind of hurts.
Oh, so that one's pretty easy.
Yeah, that one is an easy keep your hand off type of thing.
And it's so puffy.
It looks like I got punched in the face.
So it's one of those things.
I got the stye.
I'm just feeling run down.
I got like my fucking knee is killing me from running and I didn't stretch.
You know when everything sort of, you get a week where it's like, fuck, I just feel like everything's busted up this week.
It's like when your car hits that year where just everything all falls apart.
And then you're both like the engine blows a gasket, but then also the dome light goes out.
And you're like, these aren't even related.
Yeah.
But I put some miles on this thing.
It all falls down. dome light goes out and you're like these aren't even related yeah but i put some miles on this that's it's so funny when you have like minor things that you just tolerate on your car where
you're like well this sticks a little bit but that's okay and like the dash is kind of fucked
up but that's okay but then when they start to ping pong off each other like comorbidities
you're like well i might have to get a new car this sucks i'll tell you i'll fall apart
we're i'm gonna the t-bird is probably gonna have to be a new car. This sucks. I'll tell you. This is all falling apart. I mean, the T-Bird is probably going to have to be put to sleep pretty soon.
Timothy.
We've got it on hospice care at the moment.
Wow.
It's a hell of a car, and it is fast, let me tell you.
It is fast.
It can motor.
I had a moment with it.
It takes, what was it, a gallon a mile?
Yeah, it's a glugger it's a v8 250 horses but i the other day
i like i didn't have any engine problems but i had like three things in 10 seconds where it was like
gathunk which is like a transmission thing and then also the body of the car is sitting very
loosely on top of like the wheels so then it kind of shook and then i i turned the car off and then i restarted
it when i got back in and it wouldn't start and i was like that has nothing to do with that other
thing what's a transmission problem oh boy it's funny when you have an old car i had old cars
you feel like it gets to a certain point you You just feel like, can I bring it into the mechanic?
And there's nothing wrong with the engine.
Just tighten every screw up on the entire thing.
Because it needs to get back into shape a little bit.
Like you're saying with the loose top you're talking about.
Obviously, the top of your car is not going to fall off.
It just feels looser and funky.
I told you right there. I got this guy in my neighborhood,
a really good, honest mechanic, Greg.
Wait, who do you go to?
Zach?
It's on Hillhurst.
It's like ACE or something like that.
Ah, ACE.
Oh, I go to Vine.
It's kind of a blue building?
Vine Auto.
I don't think it's called Ace.
Oh, Vine Auto.
Vine Auto, I've been to, Jeff.
Zach is the guy over there.
He's great. That's right next to Best Fish zach is the guy over there he's great that's
right next to on best fish that's right oh yeah mine's best fish wait that's called vine auto
mine's called like a c e i don't know something like that anyway i like the guy but uh i'll drop
off the car and tell him like yeah there's a few things wrong with it and then i come back for my
estimate and he'll be like hey tim welcome back, welcome back. Okay, so this car.
Welcome back.
Look at the way we got Tim here.
We got Tim.
Tim here, he's ready to pay a lot of money.
Kind of like Big Hand Bobber.
Let me just check the sheet.
He'll be like, Tim, okay, so I took a look at the car and I just wanted to ask you first,
you like this car, right?
I'm like, yeah.
He's like, you see yourself driving this car uh for a
while longer right yeah okay okay like how much money you're looking because it's basically uh
infinite the amount of the the estimate he could give me could be two hundred thousand dollars if
he if he added up all the broken parts. But I'm telling him to prioritize.
Which ones won't kill me?
And the one about having the car stay on top of the wheels.
That was a big one.
That's the best one.
Yeah.
Let's keep that one.
It's really important to me to keep the car on top of those wheels.
I need the wheels on the car and the car to be there.
You know what I mean?
Yep.
Damn. Jeez, I'm starting to feel like this podcast the car to be there. You know what I mean? Yep. Damn.
Jeez, I'm starting to feel like this podcast is car talk all of a sudden.
Yeah, no, it's not click and clack, the Tappet brothers.
Let's get into some booze news.
Booze news.
Hit it.
Hit it.
Hit it.
Hit it.
Hit it.
Hit it.
Hit it.
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Hit it.
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Hit it.
Hit it.
Hit it.
Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it. Hit it.. Hit it. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I'm a good. I Oh Oh, fuck!
No, Alex Dunn is Alex Dunn. Alex Dunn.
Alex Dunn.
Oh, fuck!
It's Booze News, you shock jock fuckers.
Oh, that was the Tim scream
at the end. That was dynamite.
Fried Dutz was sent
to us by our friend Tom from Redondo.
Those
were clips from when Jeff wore a shock
collar and got shocked every time he said the word like.
Dang, that was the 100th episode. Martini.
Martini. Well, it sounds
silly when they're all just lined up. If you
have a booze news theme, email it to thesloppyboyspodcast at gmail.com.
That was good.
It took me a second to realize what was happening.
Once I did, oh, I was...
Yeah, the likes in the songs.
It took me a minute.
I knew instantly.
So you were getting the brunt of all the likes.
Yes, yes.
Yes, yes.
Well, I had a segment I had to do for booze news.
This was the,
our network actually reached out to me and they have the segment they
wanted me to do,
I guess.
Oh,
well,
I guess their,
their normal guy wasn't,
it was just like one of those things where he was not really available
today for various reasons.
So I did this segment.
Let's,
let's go ahead and hear it.
Gail watch 2022.
What is up calpike here up in the gail watch 2022 chapter copter where we cover all things gail just want to break a big story we've
been tracking apparently teen pop sensation gail has canceled her fall tour yes she put out a
statement saying that she is quote learning how to be an adult and how best
to do this life. So we don't know the exact details, but we do know that Gale ticket holders
will be refunded and Gale will be working on new music and doing festival appearances. But as for
us up in the Chopter Copter, we've sort of changed focus for the time being and we just want to send a warm congratulations to live rod
on her three grammy wins at the 2022 grammy awards live rod you're back you're better than ever
and this is your time to shine baby over and out gail watch 2022 damn yeah wow did not see that
coming you got the keys to the chopper?
Yeah, they had them over at the network
They had the keys
They keep them just on that ring there by the door
Now, Mike, did you have any missed calls or anything?
No
They told me that they'd farm that out
Whenever they felt I was doing a bad job
I thought that was kind of your thing with Acast
It was was but they
no they made it very clear i was not doing i did i did gail watch uh they kind of made it clear why
are we doing gail watch what is this why are we talking about the chopter copter a lot uh yeah
you know i can't remember the one where it didn't even go up one day because there was problems with
the chopter copter i was blamed for that right i asked them i i said like i know so gail is a pop star that has a song and we started talking about her like
mike did gail watch a bunch in the spring on the show and now you want me to do it like what's the
deal and they said it's like a uh colonel sanders kind of a thing yeah okay like make it your own
yeah they got mad i was putting a lot of You remember the fax machine was in there.
I was bringing a lot of equipment.
Did they take the gumball machine out, Tim?
It's empty.
The machine was there, but there's no gumballs in it.
Okay.
So they like the fun stuff, but they don't when I'm spending a lot of money on things I need to report about.
You know, a helicopter is very like weight sensitive.
So they were probably like, well, what are we going to do with this gumball machine?
Maybe get rid of the gumballs, but keep the
machine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, that was a good
report, Tim. So that's crazy that
Gail is taking some time off.
Yeah.
To learn how to adult. What was the phrasing?
She had a tweet. It's good
spirited. She made a joke because it was called
the Avoiding College Tour.
And then she signed off at the end of the tweet being
like, oh, and don't worry, I'm signed off at the end of the tweet being like,
Oh,
and don't worry,
I'm not going to college. I'm still not going to or something like that.
So,
um,
I think,
I mean,
she's very young.
I think she's like 17.
So she probably,
I'm sure that's a ton to handle.
Yeah.
I mean,
Hey,
what?
I'm 18 and I have trouble on our tours.
Yeah.
We can't get you to any of the venues.
Yeah. I'm waiting outside because I can't get a wristband all night singing
in the window. Well, the venue
that we played in Vancouver
was going to be the home of the Gale
show this month. Oh, right.
Fortune Sound Club.
Yep. Those Vancouverans won't be able to see
Gale. Oh, she would have rocked it.
But, you know, so Tim, I to see Gale. Oh, she would have rocked it. Let me guess, they probably want us to fill in.
Tim, I'm going to reiterate.
I'm going to, what's the word I'm looking for?
I'm going to.
Piggyback.
Piggyback on your congrats for your support for Gale
and also a big congrats to Livrod.
Yeah, Livrod.
Three of those little gold guys.
Yeah.
Hey, Livrod and Prosper, huh?
Yeah.
That's right.
Yeah.
That's what they'd say on the Enterprise.
You got to admit that.
I admit it.
It pains me to admit it, but I will admit it.
Jeff, do you admit?
Yeah, I'll admit it.
Nice.
Yeah, you're probably thinking, I'd like to admit this guy, Bell.
Hey.
Hey.
Well, I guess that's it for like regular Booze News, but I kind of sort of have a segment within Booze News.
Folks, this is a returning segment.
Oh my God.
It's time for Dutton's Delights. Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah
Folks, welcome to Dutton's Delights.
Here I talk about things that I find delightful
and things that bring me joy in this world.
And one of the things I like is sort of helping people out
with their creative projects.
That's one of my delights.
And I know one of you guys mentioned the first time you heard the Dutton's Delights theme,
you recognized that voice as Marge Simpsons.
Jeff, she married Homer.
Yes, yes, that oaf.
But you said like, hey, how'd you get how'd you get march to do it and i said well you know she owed me a favor i helped her with a thing and uh she has a great voice i
thought she'd be great for the title segment right for dutton's delight and didn't you help
her with her um you help with the lighting at her playboy shoot oh michael you joke but no i know i
didn't those were the professionals at playboy why they gotta put marge in playboy yeah well uh
so the the favor thing came back around and marge hit me up said jeff uh could you help me out with
this thing i don't really know i don't really know like garage band i said well what's what do you
what do you need? Okay.
Whatever you need, I'm here for you.
And so I just wanted to play you a little thing
that Marge and I worked on.
Great. Cool.
Pick it up to me,
I know it's better.
Be sweet to me,
homie. Our daughter
is Lisa. Our other
daughter is Maggie
Be sweet to me, homie
Be sweet to me, homie
And help me sell all the pretzels
That's a nice laugh at the end for her.
She's still selling the pretzels.
Yeah, I don't know.
She said she was getting intozels. Yeah, I don't know. She said
she was getting into some trouble with
some local
ruffians, but yeah, they're trying
to sell pretzels. Pretzel?
Jeez, trouble? She's got
more money than anybody. She's been on that TV show for
35 years.
Yeah, yeah. I think it's cool, Jeff,
that you help people with their creative projects.
You could help people produce some booze news themes, by the way.
But I love that Marge had something she needed to say to Homer,
and she wanted to do it by way of a parody of a Japanese breakfast song.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Be Sweet by Japanese Breakfast.
Great song.
She must know Japanese breakfast through just entertainment,
the entertainment world.
Entertainment, but then also, if you think about it,
Springfield has a lot of big bands go through there,
like The Who played on that wall.
Right, right.
Smashing Pumpkins went through.
Smashing Pumpkins at their height, too.
U2, right?
Yeah.
Well, anyway, thanks for letting me share that with you.
And thanks to Marge for letting me play that little clip.
Yeah.
And that's a delightful thing you're interested in now.
It's so cool you made that in GarageBand.
I would have heard that thought like, oh, that's got to be Pro Tools.
That's some fancy software.
But you hang out on GarageBand.
Now, this has nothing to do with the Dutton Delightfuls.
No, no.
Mike, thanks for bringing that up.
Dutton Delightfuls are turkey burgers that I make.
Right, okay.
But they could be delights as well.
And it's also, not to be confused with Dutton's Delights,
which are my, like, what is it?
Not Charlie's Angels.
Yeah, your Corey's.
Corey's Angels. Dutton's Delights are, like, my version Not Charlie's Angels. Yeah, your Corey's. Corey's Angels.
Dutton's Delights are like my version of Corey's Angels.
They're a company of exotic dancers that haven't gotten a lot of work.
You haven't booked them lately, and they've sort of just been living in storage.
Folks, we have vacancies at Dutton's Delights.
My understanding was that the Dutton Delights club was dissolved.
Well.
Or soon to be.
I don't have any, Mike.
What do you want me to do?
I got no delights.
The LLC is dissolving.
Okay, I think that's a good idea.
Well, is that it for Boozness?
Wrap it up!
Well, well, well. Well, well, well, well, well.
Don't we find ourselves now at the part of the show called the drink of the day?
Yes.
Yeah, so it seems.
The cocktail sippers moment is coming up soon.
That's when the three of us sip the cocktail, of course.
Now, you know me.
You guys know me.
I've lived in Los Angeles. Oh, I know you. You guys know me. I've lived in Los Angeles.
Oh, I know you.
Sure.
I live now in New York City. I'm a, you'd say I'm a very, I'm a cosmopolitan. I've lived
in metropolitan cities all over this great country. Well, guess what? Before you two
even met me, I lived for a year in the wonderful city, wonderful international city of Toronto,
Canada.
Wow.
You've been?
I've been, I've been.
Jeff, you've been?
When did you be here?
Yes.
Didn't we go for Just for Laughs?
No, that was Montreal.
Oh, suck my blue.
Yeah, exactly.
Now, Tim, you've been.
Believe it or not, I grew up with dual citizenship.
My parents are both from Montreal.
I've gone to Montreal hundreds of times,
and I've never set foot in the city of Toronto.
Wow.
Damn.
Well, you guys got to go.
It's such a nice city.
It's great.
It's a wonderful place to be.
And I went there for my freshman year of college
and then transferred to Ithaca, where I'm at YouTube.
But YouTube.
And let me tell you about the drink today.
If you couldn't guess it yet, based on the title of this episode
and what I've just been talking about.
Can I quickly apologize to the neighbors of the North
for confusing Montreal with Toronto?
Sure.
That's it.
Oh, you don't actually want to say it.
Those pup guys are going to kill me
Oh no, so I'm sorry, friends
I think that's okay
Jeff, because you, first of all
Canadian people are very nice
I think they'll give you a pass on that one
But I think you just thought
Canadian city you've been to
No, but I know
Some other ones
What other ones?
Vancouver Do you know ottawa edmonton do you know bamf do you know medicine hat okay okay sorry wait
hold on while we're apologizing to canadians i feel like i really dug in hard on i i said
well i said i hated ryan reynolds and i stand by that uh on a recent episode of the
show in in the in the aviation episode um we're talking about his brand of gin i said i dislike
him but then i feel like i kept running my mouth i said something about i said that you meet someone
and they're a little too smiley and they're either mega church christian or canadian and
and then and then i went on to talk about the religion of Baha'i,
and I got every fact wrong.
And I didn't know what I was talking about,
but yet I kept on talking, you know?
Sure.
Hey, it's a pod.
It's a podcast, baby.
I think the aviation may have taken flight in your mouth and mind.
Yep.
Okay, I'm off the hook.
Continue.
No, you're not.
Well, anyway. All right. Okay, I'm off the hook. Continue. No, you're not. Well, anyway.
All right.
So this drink is called the Toronto.
And, well, guys, it's not unlike, it's described a little bit like a Manhattan.
Oh, Manhattan.
A Manhattan.
That's right.
Another place name drink.
Now, this is not on the IBA.
Somebody on the Discord, I think, suggested this to us.
We went for it.
We said, let's go for it.
Yes, this was a soft hit submission, and we don't remember the name,
but thanks for sending it.
This is a cocktail that, it's one of these ones,
doesn't really have a great history to it, like a really detailed history.
It wasn't thought up on some naval base by some funny guy.
really detailed history. It wasn't thought up on some naval base by some
funny guy. This one,
the first version of this
was in 1922,
and it was not called the Toronto back then.
It was called the Fernet Cocktail.
Oh! Fernet Cocktail.
And this is, I actually like this. In addition
of Robert
Vermeer's, how would you pronounce this?
V-E-R-M-E-I-R-E.
Vermeer.
There you go.
Robert Vermeer's cocktail book.
I like this title.
Cocktails, how to mix them.
Love it.
So he, you know, did that whole thing.
And then in the 30s, another guy with a funny name called William Cocktail Boothby,
he had a book called The Fine Art of Mixing Drinks.
No, I'm sorry.
He had Cocktail Bill Boothby's World Drinks and How to Mix Them by William Cocktail Boothby.
And that's when it got its name, The Toronto.
Now, these titles of these books, they're worried
that readers might think, like,
oh, this is a cocktail book, but it's not going to go into
how to mix them.
Cocktails, how to look at them.
Should I buy a separate book for how to mix cocktails?
Now,
Differed's Guide talks
about how this drink was sort of out
of fashion for a while.
Previously forgotten classic resurrected in 2006 by Jamie Boudreau in Seattle, USA.
So it seemed like it was maybe gone away for a while.
And then the cocktail boom of the 2000s, it came back.
That's funny because the last word also came back in Seattle around that time.
So you got a lot of revival going on there.
Interesting.
Kind of like the punk revival of the early 90s.
Seattle is like the pet cemetery for dead drinks.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, you don't want to make that cocktail, hell.
Background sound.
Now, liquor.com, which is where we're going to talk about the recipe.
We've got the recipe from there.
It says, depending on who you ask, the Toronto is either a variation on the Manhattan or the old-fashioned.
Okay?
But this time, it's like the Manhattan, except instead of vermouth, we're going to use Fernet Blanca.
Let me tell you what is in this thang.
Two ounces Canadian rye whiskey.
Okay.
Oh, shit.
Canadian rye whiskey.
Because I got Canadian blended whiskey.
Because most Canadian whiskeys are blended.
I didn't think rye.
Fuck.
I think you'll be okay.
Unless you've got the sharpest of whiskey tongues.
I think you'll be okay.
I've got the broadest and bluntest. One-fourth of an ounce.
Fernet Branca. Small. That's not aest. One-fourth of an ounce, Fernet Branca.
Small. That's not a lot.
One-fourth ounce, simple syrup.
Two dashes, Angostura bitters. Garnish with an orange twist.
Add the rye
whiskey, Fernet Branca, simple syrup, and bitters
into a mixing glass with ice and stir until
well-chilled. Strain into a chilled
coupe glass and garnish with an
orange twist. It is a nice
looking little drink. If you ever
want to see pictures of an ice drink,
look up the Toronto
cocktail. Now, I've seen
other
pictures of it. They put it in a
sort of old-fashioned glass
with ice. Ooh, that's going to be my
round two. You could do that.
And you know what's interesting about this?
So, like I said, I don't exactly know why it was called the Toronto.
Some people, there was a theory that the person who, who did I say, Boothby, I forget who it was,
was working in England and they just missed Toronto or something and called it Toronto.
It's unclear.
But there is a version of this that has the whiskey,
the Fernet, the Angostura,
but instead of simple syrup,
maple syrup.
Oh! Now you think
maybe that's how and why
you could put this into the
Canadian Toronto. Very possible.
Toronto maple. I submit.
That's right. I submit that it's just because it's Canadian
whiskey.
That was used. But submit. That's right. I submit that it's just because it's Canadian whiskey that was used.
But then here's the problem.
Does it taste different?
With what?
Canadian, what's their approach?
I've never had Canadian rye, but Canadian blended whiskey, it's like it doesn't taste too bourbon-y. Or or i mean uh whiskey people are gonna rake us over
the coals for not knowing this yeah yeah but what i was gonna say is that fernet is from argentina
it's a very strong distinct flavor if we were adding more of it it would be the dominant flavor
but we're only putting a quarter ounce so this might still taste like uh manhattan we've had
other manhattan variations like the Brooklyn.
It's a very popular thing to do
and it does feel like people
have just pulled the names out of their asses
just like swapping out one of the ingredients
in Manhattan is sort of the easiest way
to make a cocktail.
But this is why I think
if you put the maple syrup in it,
it's going to give it a more distinct flavor.
Yeah. We're going distinct flavor. Yeah.
We're going with liquor.com.
That's just the simple syrup.
I'm looking forward to it, Mike,
because I've been drinking a lot more Fernet lately.
Oh, yeah.
A lot more.
You see me, Timmy.
It's good.
You drink it neat, Jay, because I put it on the rocks.
I do rocks as well.
That's nice. We had that rocks as well. That's nice.
We had that minty stuff.
That was good.
Yeah, I don't.
So wait, there's Fernet Branca.
That's the normal classic.
Then there's the minty one.
What's that called?
Fernet something else?
Not Branca?
Fernet minty.
Fernet menthol.
Fernet Branca has a really cool logo, if i'm thinking of the right yeah it's
like a globe right yes that's a good one wouldn't mind that on a hat i'll take a shirt if a hat
cannot be located all right well you want to get to stirring it up i think i would love to
stir it up all right folks We'll be right back after this.
Pew, pew.
And we're back with Toronto's.
In hand?
In hand.
Yes, in hand, yes.
Jeff went with the coupe glass.
So did Timmy.
Very nice.
Now, Tim, do you have a champagne glass?
Is that what that is with the little ridge?
I think it's a martini glass.
This is a cocktail glass, just a V-shaped martini glass. Oh, I see, I see.
The glare was a little different.
But you know, sometimes there's those champagne,
like there's the flutes that we all know,
but then there's those champagne glasses that you see in like,
say like It's a Wonderful Life.
It's like, here, let's all drink.
Yeah.
You know, they used to use that when they're giving out the champagne
at Dimple's Karaoke Bar.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've seen those kind of low score ones.
It's almost like the rim is a little, a bit smaller,
like it's bulbs and it comes in a little bit like a wine glass.
Yep.
Alright, sips.
Jeff, did you mix
in a mixed glass? Mixing glass? I did it
all. I'm a law-abiding citizen
today. Me too.
But I look forward to round two with
rocks. Bottoms up.
He doesn't even have a sip yet, and he's already changing it.
Jeez.
Ooh.
Yeah, okay.
A little Fernette.
Now, I found in my math that a quarter, what were we doing, a quarter ounce?
Yeah.
Is half a tablespoon.
Ooh, wow, that so that half tablespoon of fornette's coming through but not taking over the drink well it's pungent pungent stuff yeah it really is
drinking it straight is it's funny too you know what blood is kind of like this you ever see some
blood in a pool or something and you're like oh my god that's a lot of blood but blood is kind of like this. You ever see some blood in a pool or something, and you're like, oh, my God, that's a lot of blood.
But blood is a real, it's really pigmenty.
Oh, yeah.
You can't hide blood.
Scrub as you might.
People find it.
Find it in your veins.
I taste more Fernet than whiskey now, to be honest with you.
I'm getting a little kiss of Angostura, which is nice.
And the sugar really just sort of mellowed it out.
That simple syrup is nice.
Sure.
Now, are you feeling like this is close to a Manhattan or closer to an old-fashioned?
Manhattan.
It feels Manhattan-y only because of the glass.
Also the rye.
Manhattan.
But because of the rye. And, but because of the rye.
And I didn't do Canadian rye.
I did Kentucky because that's all I had.
Yeah, sure.
I would think I'd be hard-pressed to put a Canadian rye right up next to a Kentucky rye and know the difference.
Yeah, sure.
Having never had Canadian rye that I know of. Yeah.
I'm right there with you buddy now we
got listeners who would be offended by that i had canadian blended whiskey so mine might be closer
to a bourbon taste or something but mine when i think about it mine is more like a a kicked up
old-fashioned or something because uh to me a manhattan has a decent amount of vermouth in it enough to
to water down that whiskey and make it sort of you know it's kind of a controversial episode
of this show that we didn't really like the manhattans and people really love it but it
all comes down to that sweet red vermouth that you buy because we had terrible stuff
and if you have it with a good stuff or is is this one where the IBA kind of got in the way?
I think it's our purchasing of the sweet red vermouth was,
shall we say, thrifty.
See, now I think, oh, I remember my sweet red vermouth
was one that was just like sitting around for a little while.
Oh, that was the dusty one.
Yeah, that was dusty.
I have since found sweet red
vermouths that I love, that I would even
drink straight. Oh, tell your friends,
Mike, Tim. Sure. Tell us all about
it. Well, I'd love to have some.
It's the classic looking
one. It's like Antigua
de Camparici
Giorgio
Camparici
That Toronto is working his job quite well.
Antiqua Carpano.
Carbonara.
Carboni.
Yeah.
Okay.
Carburetor.
I got to get my T-Bird carburetor fixed.
Not that I mentioned it.
Yeah, this is good.
It's a little stiffy, though, I'll tell you.
It's two ounces of rye.
So after round two, four ounces of rye?
After round two, you might have to head to that ER.
Now, while you guys are sipping away,
let me tell you a drinking story about my time in Toronto.
So I turned 19 there.
You understand?
And you were on crutches for much of the year.
No.
That was at Ithaca.
When I transferred to Ithaca, I had broken my ankle right before I transferred.
So I had about a month.
There you go.
A little bit.
Maybe a month on crutches.
Anyway, so we're up there.
And I turned 19.
So we can go.
The drinking age is 19 there.
So I had my license that said I was 19 years old.
We went to a bar that night and it was, I think it was a birthday that wasn't like a,
it wasn't like a party, like a weekend type of a thing. Yeah, we'd already been going to the
bars anyway, but it wasn't like a Saturday night. So I was like, all right, it's whatever. It's a
school night. Let's still just go out. So we went out and we went to a bar and I was like,
here you go. I'm 19. And he's like, no, like no no no you're not because it was a new york license and i was like no i
turned 19 today he's like yeah i know you guys can get these things that made down on young street in
30 minutes and i was like oh no but i actually am the guy you were letting me in two days ago with
a fake one but now i'm real i'm real i'm really see real boys that's wild so he didn't yoink it
though he didn't keep it did he no no no and i think we just went to a bar next to it and went
and it was fine but uh yes yes very interesting mike as an as an underclassman how did you find the party scenes different in Toronto and Ithaca, New York?
The difference was
location, Tim,
location, location, location.
Ithaca was house-based
with a little bit more bar scene as you got
into your 21st year, usually
in senior year, and Toronto was
more bar-based.
Oh, because, yeah, there you go.
You're in the heart of the city it was difficult too
with Toronto
because it was such
a humongous school
in a
it was one of those
schools where
I would imagine
maybe like NYU
or
Boston University
where it's like
the dorms and stuff
and all the buildings
are like right in the city
so it's like
you walk across the street
now you're off campus
so you kind of were it was and there were so people, so it just kind of felt like there weren't places to party other than going to bars.
You get a group of friends and go out rather than like, hey, we're all meeting at this bar.
Yeah, I would spend New Year's when I would go home to New Hampshire for the holidays.
I would spend New Year's in Boston and it would be like BU and BC friends.
And I thought it was like way overwhelming that their campus was just the city of boston like yeah it's a little
bit training wheelsy but i really did appreciate that ithaca was just a city full of only people
my age basically like it just felt like i'm the mayor yeah everyone's like me. But I don't know.
I kind of liked that aspect of it not being super overwhelming.
Boston College is more of a defined campus, if I remember correctly.
But BU is, yeah, right there.
It's funny.
It was good enough for Howard Stern, I suppose.
Yes, he's a graduate.
He's a Terrier.
And he's kind of a pioneer shock jock.
And we're now like young shock jocks
Trying to be like him
I think there was something where he wanted to donate a bunch of money
And put his name on a building
And they said no and he didn't give them the money
Was it going to be
Fartman?
Yeah
Fartman Smell Lab
Yeah if he wants to give a bunch of money to a podcast
Put his name on a podcast
I'm all ears We could even have Baba Booey come in No Fart Man Smell Lab. Yeah, if he wants to give a bunch of money to a podcast, put his name on a podcast. Ooh, that'd be nice.
I'm all ears.
We could even have Baba Booey come in.
No.
Gary, the producer?
Produce this show.
What's the genesis of Baba Booey?
Why is he called that?
I don't know.
That's a good question.
That is a very good question.
You know, I watched the Howard Stern movie during the summertime.
Never seen it.
I found it to be a very good movie.
Yeah.
Very interesting.
He's a really good actor.
They're all good, and it's a great story.
And they got a guy named Pig Vomit.
That's an interesting...
Paul Giamatti.
Interesting thing.
I wonder if that's happened other times in history
where the star it was something you're making a movie about the guy and it's starring the guy
you know it's not like it's not even like a hair off like like sort of like apatow movies where
you're like oh it's pete davidson playing a pete davidson-esque thing right right this is howard
stern starring in his own biopic biopic truly truly
like uh eight miles the only other one i can think of ah but he calls himself rabbit in that isn't
yeah he's yeah you're right but yeah you're right you're right okay true but it's it's it's pretty
close to his story but no but usually you do that thing if you have the real guy you do an
amalgamation um i even heard that like back in
like the 20s and 30s with books it was more in style rather than writing a memoir you would just
write a novel that was what happened to you like that's why like ernest hemingway wrote all these
novels and they like happened to him basically but he was just like you didn't you didn't just
write a memoir back then you'd be like uh there was a guy named schmernest uh flemingway i don't
know and he was handsome as hell and he didn't drink a lot um there uh let me tell you something
else about reading books no here's what i'll say this about howard stern how did he find the time
how did he find the time to shoot this movie?
He does this thing every single day. That was when he was still a bad boy and at the top of his game, too.
I remember he was promoting that when we were in junior high or high school.
He had the E! show.
Yeah.
I feel like the TV show on E! Entertainment was probably what led to the spike in fame that propelled him.
Well, Private Parts was a book, too.
Oh, really?
Yes, I remember that cover being really scandalous.
His book.
That's convenient.
Oh, and the other thing I was going to say is
I'm reading The Thin Man by Dashiell Hammett.
Oh, he picked Powell's books.
That's right, up in Portland.
And it is true what they say. They drink, like, on every he picked Howell's books. That's right, up in Portland. And it is true what they
say. It's, uh, they drink
like on every page. It's very funny.
I'll tell you
how it ends when I get there. Okay.
That's all I had to say.
Um,
do you guys mind if I
recount something that happened to me
recently? Oh, yeah, yeah. Tim, that'd be
great. Yeah, because the podcast is sort of an open forum for, yeah, yeah. Tim, that'd be great.
Because the podcast is sort of an open forum for anecdotes or whatever, right?
Yeah.
Totally.
You guys might actually like this,
because I knew
we were doing a drink called the Toronto
this week, and I wanted...
I was like, how cool would it be
if I
go to uh toronto and um do some research and
stuff but just schedules didn't work out i didn't really have the the money to do there to go do it
and i was kind of sad and so on saturday night this week i was kind of feeling down and you know
what always cheers me up is to just go to the um sunset strip yes yeah if if it's
ever like hey did you bump into tim this afternoon he was kind of not doing so great oh well if you
need him he'll probably be on the strip he's on the strip yeah it's kind of one of my um coping
mechanisms but anyway so i was down in the strip i went to one of the you know the hottest clubs and the
doorman waves me in i love you down there bottle service i said oh i love this bottle how do i pay
for it no charge that's yeah it's on the arm i pay for it um but then i'm scanning the you know
how i'll sort of scan the room for celebrities and stuff? Yeah. Because I want to network with them or find common ground, really.
We need to find a project.
Let's collab, bro.
We got to, man.
Who do I see?
This is great because I was sad about not going to Toronto.
Right.
But who do I see when I'm looking for celebrities?
Drake.
Oh, my.
Of course. Toronto native. The Prince of Toronto. This is Toronto'm looking for celebrities? Drake. Oh, my. Of course.
Toronto native.
The Prince of Toronto.
This is Toronto's number one son, Drake.
Champagne Poppy, right?
Champagne Poppy.
Right, right, right.
Yes.
What's his other nickname?
Does he have another nickname?
Drizzy.
The Snake.
The Snake.
Drake the Snake.
The Snake, I think, is more...
Taylor.
No. Who's that presidential nominee warren
no warren's not the snake that was all the all bernie people were caught were putting emojis in
her uh oh really i thought they'll get into it i'm trying to talk about champagne poppy for once
yeah good tim is trying to share a personal poppy for once. Good, good, good.
Tim is trying to share a personal experience.
Tim, you have the floor.
Not Elizabeth Warren.
Like, Elizabeth Warren and Drake are different people, quite frankly.
But anyway, back to my story.
So I said, hey, Drake, love your work.
He said, likewise. And I you know, love your work. He said, likewise.
And I started, I sent him a bottle of champagne.
He sent me a bottle of champagne.
Next thing you know, we're kind of talking.
And I said to him, I said, holy shit,
you're from the very city where my podcast co-host
went to freshman year of college.
Holy shit.
Was he there well i i i said you know all the stuff you know all the people coming in and out of your city you must have clocked mike
you know uh and yeah yeah he's he's a perceptive guy he's he's lyricist he's a rapper he's gonna
you know be kind of watching who who's on his turf yeah he spent some time in
the lyricist lounge i'm sure sure yeah absolutely um so i said i i i i say hey drake and he's like
yeah i was like well you so you know mike was in your city for a year he's like yeah and i was like
drizzy i mean aub. What do you think of him?
When it comes to Hanford, what do you think of him?
And he, as he started to answer me, I reached for my cell phone.
Thank God I started recording.
You take a picture.
Oh, you wanted to take an audio recording.
Well, I wanted to roll audio because I thought it could be good content
for the podcast.
Perfect for the podcast.
Tim, when you were telling the story,
I was like, oh, God, I hope you remember to grab his phone.
I did.
So here's the voice note.
Here's me.
I just, yes?
You need to get video next time,
because I want to see these people doing this stuff.
Yeah, that would be even better.
More senses involved.
Also, if I had video,
then we could look closely and make sure it's not fake Drake.
Have you guys seen him on Instagram?
Fake Drake?
No.
There's a guy who goes to clubs and he looks like Drake and he even shaved the heart into his hairline.
Yeah, wouldn't you?
Oh, man.
I would.
And he gets free drinks and stuff?
Well, it's funny because it started off like, hey, this guy looks like Drake.
Then enough time passed that fake Drake just became famous as fake Drake.
So now there's clubs all around the world and it's like, fake Drake's here.
And people are like, yeah.
It is fake Drake.
All right.
Great.
Okay, enough fake Drake.
Back to me.
I'm at me, Sunset Strip.
I turn to Drake and I say
what yeah what'd you think of Hanford
I think he said it up three
times
hold on
let me get this straight
you ran into the rapper
rap singer Drake
and you know that he clocked your boy
Hanford and you asked him what he thought
folks this is not what it's like on the blowout.
The blowout is streamlined.
Get the blowout.
Get on the Patreon.
We do not dick around this way.
I started recording on my phone.
And in answer to my question, like, what do you think, Mike?
Here's what Champagne Poppy said.
Gotcha.
Yeah. Nice. yeah I saw Mike and he seemed kind of weird to me always talking about a dish called rye coach
he says drinks are ashy if they have comfrey I heard that Mike dines quite often down at Barbies Down at Barbie's. Odd man. Odd man.
He has nice long brown hair, though.
Yep.
And a father that's named Bo.
Yep.
Wow.
Please come back to Toronto.
Yep.
He wears Asics on his feet.
Yep.
Owns a Metallica tee.
Yep.
Sister-in-law named Lindsay.
Yes.
And still. Hot wings. Sister-in-law named Lindsay Yes Is still
Hot wings
Eats a lot of hot wings
And he listening, he listening to fish
Yeah, he listening to fish at Arby's
Hot man
Man, wow
It sounds like God's plan
It sounds like his song
Right
God's plan
And it must have been playing in the background or something
Because it lines up so
Serendipitously I guess I would say
I should have told you guys
It was instrumental night at that club
And they were kind of just playing the beats from a lot of songs
Oh that's cool
I hear they're doing that at clubs a lot now
Because people can still talk
But they can like rap talk to their
friends or sing yeah talk to their friends well a lot of people have social anxiety and if they
can rap talk to their friends it's a lot easier right sure right if you're playing sometimes it's
easier to play a character than yourself on stage and that's what's going on with this rap talk yeah
great yeah well that's a great that's a great find tim i'm glad you also like got to the record
button in time.
Um, and you can tell that he's like sort of at the lowest his register could possibly
be.
I noticed that he was struggling a little bit at the end.
It was like just breath towards the end, but I made it out.
He's a pro.
He's a pro.
He was late getting to the club and he had been running and huffing and puffing.
Sure. Oh, he ran there there And you know what about the voice
He probably came from like Chateau Marmont or something
While he had COVID
Then these days everyone
Oh that's tough
Well I can't believe he knew
Because I don't really remember
Hanging out with Drake at all
It must have been
But just that he knew so much about me, that's...
He's a very perceptive guy. I like that.
Good for him. And it doesn't bother you he thinks
of you as an odd man?
No, because at first I did. I was like, hey,
that's not... But then he had so many nice things to say
that I thought, oh, maybe odd man's just...
You know when you say something's
dope or someone's dope?
It doesn't mean they are a dope.
It means they are good.
They share
cool qualities that you look for in a
cool person.
For a while there, people would say,
that shit's stupid.
That didn't actually mean it was stupid the way that you and I would say it.
Right, right, right.
And shit didn't mean feces.
Right.
Shit could mean food.
Shit could mean food?
For some.
Maybe for a little pay pig.
Who are the piggies?
Nasty little piggies.
Lined up all in a row.
Some people will come up to me and say,
you smell like shit and you are stupid.
They say that right to your face?
To my face.
And I just, you know, hey, thanks, man.
Thanks for the compliment.
Do you take it in the spirit in which it's intended?
I say you're pretty shitty your damn self.
Hell yeah.
All right.
All right.
Well, let's take another little break here.
Wait, what would you tweak?
Tweaks.
Tweaks.
Tweaks.
It's tweak week.
I might just try it on the rocks.
I thought the balance of Fernet was actually pretty good.
I mean, I guess maybe a tad less Fernet,
but I think the simple syrup is good and the Angostura is good,
but I want rocks.
Me too.
I'm going to do exactly that.
As written.
You're going to make your drink not unlike Drake's wrist at times
and get it icy.
There you go.
I should rap sometime with Drake.
Yeah.
Oh, if you did a verse on one of his songs.
God, if I featured on a Drake song, you know what that would do for this podcast?
Holy shit.
Mike, it's not hard.
Write that email.
I know.
I know, but I second guess myself.
Mike, you just have to ask.
He's an adult.
He can say no.
You ask.
What can he say?
If he doesn't want to do it, he says no.
Right, because if you start having the whole conversation and and i don't want you
writing the email being like no big deal if not and sorry for asking don't go in qualifying yourself
just i hate that i know i gotta pressure it's this compare and despair thing i'm always am i
do i have enough as much money as drake uh did i have uh billboard hits at the same age as drake
yeah compare and despair is killing us.
Well, what's the answer to those?
Do you have as much money as Drake?
Because I don't really know your financials.
I don't know.
Well, I don't know his financials exactly,
but just based on the magazine covers he's been on
and the home that he has.
Right, Architectural Digest, you saw that penthouse.
It seems like he would have you.
Maybe he's renting.
Maybe he's renting. Yeah, you don't know,'t know tim and you know mike this is good because you have a platform and like it'd be cool
i don't know if this is going to happen but it would be cool if next week um we actually heard
you on a drake track that would be great god me we can play it on the pod oh you know what i hope
doesn't happen i just hope that doesn't happen,
or I get featured on Drake Track,
and who else should be featured on it
that he's maybe producing with
is Thrilla and Benedicto.
I would hate to be in the room.
Because a lot of these people,
then when they do collabs,
they just do their verse
and they send it in.
They don't know
who else might be on that track
or if it's going to end up
on the person's album or whatever.
Yeah. Oh, God. It's a Benedicto
track attack? Oh, man.
Well, we hope that doesn't happen,
but for now,
why don't we take a little break,
and when we come back, we'll do round two
and final thoughts. Great.
I love that for us. Folks,
why don't we meet back up here
after some ads?
Ooh!
As women,
our life stages come with unique risk factors.
Like when our estrogen
levels drop during menopause,
causing the risk of heart disease to go up.
Know your risks.
Visit heartandstroke.ca Now we're back with our second round of, what are these?
Toronto!
Toronto!
I just did a big old cube like an old-fashioned, you know?
Hey, nice. Ooh, nice. Looks good. Tim like an old-fashioned, you know? Hey, nice.
Ooh, nice.
Looks good.
Tim got an old-fashioned cup, too.
I did a heavy, I did a, what was it, a half-tablespoon, you said, of Fernette?
Yeah.
Half-teaspoon?
Half-tablespoon.
I did a heaping half.
Heaping half.
You did a Toronto tablespoon.
You know what I got?
I got myself one of these little dull
pineapple juices.
We made something recently with these.
I forget what it was.
But I had a six pack of these little guys in my
fridge and I was drinking them. And I've just been
getting them a whole bunch. I love it.
Mike, you were drinking them at my place too.
I was drinking your extras too.
Love it.
I like seeing you in the zoom screen with that tiny little can
Because it makes you look huge
Yeah
And hey that pineapple juice Tim
Saved your voice on tour
Yes it worked
The boys from Dear Blanca told me
Tim you're losing your voice
Drink some pineapple juice before the show
It really did
And
Even if it was uh psychosomatic i who cares fuck you
plus i bet your tongue tasted exquisite oh interesting interesting i i will admit I was sucking myself off later, and I said, ooh, gourmet.
Citrusy material.
Material.
I had to get the material out of me some way.
All right.
Final thoughts.
What do you think, Timmy?
I think it's delicious.
It's an order again.
And here's what I want to say to Slapheads.
Let's say you're a bit of a dumbass, right? We love you. You love us. It's delicious. It's an order again. And here's what I want to say to Slapheads.
Let's say you're a bit of a dumbass, right?
We love you.
You love us.
You listen to this pod and you're like us.
You don't really know about booze. You're never going to be a hold of conversation about the cool boozes.
If you were to learn one reference to make, you want to sound knowledgeable on a date or something
yeah order like just make ferment have for net be your one thing smart people drink it and when
someone orders it and it's it's like very mainstream as of now i hadn't heard of it until
a few years ago but like i will say it's a shortcut for the people around you to think you work at a bar.
You know? Yes.
I was just seeing, I was thinking
this and then I saw it in print and it
just confirmed it. Fernette is popular
among bartenders and wait
staff. Amaro,
man, this is what
a shift ends or whatever
or they're doing like, they're getting the
kitchen staff is having a shot together.
It's a sticky black Italian liqueur.
Hmm.
Uh,
so what do you say?
Oh,
for me,
it's an order again,
Mike.
Okay.
Um,
Tim say order again,
order again.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I,
I promise you,
I will try this at some time at some point.
This is not the best execution of like
Fernet
I like it better on the rocks because this is going to get melty
And it's going to be really my style
Like a southern sipper
This does feel like a bizarre mashup of cocktails
I kind of prefer Fernet to be its own thing
But whatever, it's fine
I think that what you're doing here
The reason to do this
Is just that you don't want to have a whole Fernette.
Like we said, it's very pungent and even on rocks.
Don't you want that whole Fernette?
But here's the thing.
You want to stretch that bottle out.
You got the bottle in your bar, your home bar, your bar cart.
And you want it to last for a year.
So you get yourself some cheap ass whiskey
and dribble some just have a whiskey on the rock with a dribble of fernet you don't even need the
angostura or the sugar and it'll just make you feel like you're drinking a fernet but you're
not blowing through your fernet yeah or hey you know what you do give yourself a fernandito
oh that's coca-Cola, right?
If you like the Fernet, if you like this episode,
go back and listen to Fernandito.
That's not like half and half, is it?
It is.
And we remarked on that episode.
I remember tasting that and we were like,
holy shit, it didn't dilute the Fernet at all.
It just makes more Fernet.
You know what?
We did that episode out in,
in LA.
And that's why I remembered buying this for net,
uh,
Bronca.
And I was looking at my bar car.
I was like,
why don't I have it here?
It's because I bought it out there in LA for us.
We were,
I was,
I got the,
the for net that day.
Oh,
I'm seeing a, that's why according to the
iba uh 50 mil fernet and then top up with cola but yeah so oh they didn't give a number for the top
but but this this is like the fun collegey drink right like yeah it was the argentinian
college party drink they're unbothered by exact measurements that's fine that's cool
it's not a highball either,
right?
They build it in an
old-fashioned glass.
That's interesting.
Usually top up with
Coke is a highball.
Well,
well,
that's life.
That's our show.
Follow us on social media
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Whoa.
That's patreon.com slash the Sloppy Boys.
Folks, it was a good episode.
And Mike and Tim, great job today.
Nice moves out there.
Thank you.
You know what's cool about this episode?
It had a Gale Watch.
Yeah. It had a Dutton's delightfuls and then i had the full note from when i the lights from when i talked to drake
so this this episode hashtag stacked it's jam-packed and you know what i should have brought
this up at the beginning i meant to bring this up. I wasn't drinking today because I wanted to feel better.
But also to prove a point that you don't have to drink all the time.
You don't have to be drunk.
No.
You can have a great episode like the one we just have here,
and you're not drinking.
Wow.
Right.
And then, Tim, I wanted to bring it back to something you just said.
People are going to hear
this episode and be like this episode's stacked stacked that's probably going to be the the one
word they use to refer to this episode hashtag stacked will probably just be that pamela anderson
show from on abc the multicam sitcom that she had yeah so folks come up with a better hashtag than
just stacked for this one where she worked in a library right
And that's why
I always wondered why did they call that show stacked
And it's because the books are in the stacks
Of the library
Yeah that's the only reason
Alright folks we love ya
See ya next week Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys
Give it up for your boys
Give it up for your boys