The Sloppy Boys - 18. Negroni
Episode Date: February 19, 2021The guys guzzle an Italian apéritif they won't soon forget.NEGRONI RECIPE30 ml Gin30 ml Bitter Campari30 ml Sweet Red VermouthPour all ingredients directly into chilled old fashioned glass filled wit...h ice. Stir gently. Garnish with half orange slice.Recipe via the International Bartenders Association (https://www.iba-world.com/) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Hey folks, thanks for calling the Sloppy Boys.
Keep it in.
Maybe I do need the cheat. Here we go.
Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys, where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love.
I'm Jeff Dutton, along with Mike Hanford.
Heidi Ho, neighborino.
Ugh.
And Tim Kalpakis.
What is up? And happy Vermouth Month.
Oh, my God. Vermouth Month is happening right now.
Wait, wait, wait, Mike.
And we're your hosts, the Sloppy Boys.
Go ahead. Go ahead.
Oh, my God. Verm Munch is happening right now.
It's back, baby.
We took a little break and now it's back.
Did you guys recognize the impression I was doing?
Mr. Burns.
Mr. Burns, the man, the myth, the billionaire legend of Springfield.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Enough of the silly stuff.
Hi, Jeff.
Hi, Tim.
Hi, Mike.
How's it going?
Hi, Tim.
Good.
You know what's kind of cool
today is that we got ourselves a lot of
do-do-do-do-do-do booze
news. Yeah, let's cut the chit-chat
up top. This is all pointless.
Let's get to the news. This is pressing stuff.
Hey, listen to this one.
This one
blew my hair back. Yingling is putting
out a new beer. Oh, I thought you were going to say seltzer, Tim. Nope Yingling is putting out a new beer.
Oh,
I thought you were going to say seltzer,
Tim.
Nope.
They're putting out a new flavor of a beer.
Seltzer flavored.
Is it?
Yeah.
Seltzer flavored beer.
Is it like a flavor?
Like we know out in the real world,
like a honeydew.
Is it honeydew?
No.
Huh? Uh, raspberry. No, Jeff. Wait, is it, honeydew. Is it honeydew? No.
Raspberry.
No, Jeff.
Wait, it's a flavor flavor. It's not just like,
oh, it's an IPA. It's a flavor flavor and we've shit talked it before.
Peppermint.
Grapefruit.
Raging Eagle
Mango Beer.
Oh! Raging Eagle Mango Beer. I i don't it doesn't roll off the tongue
it is a 24 ounce can of mango infused beer targeted at young adults who are on the go
driving but i i mean i like golden roads mango, but we've talked about why does just every seltzer, they all get the mango.
Why is mango ubiquitous, especially Yingling?
You know, that's like an old Pennsylvania beer.
The varieties they have now are just like lager, light lager, black and tan, porter, like pretty normal.
And now a huge jump to mango.
That's funny, too.
Like, I wonder what the there's so many different fruits out there.
Why is it just like mango?
Like what's the market research on that?
I think it is.
It's jewel pods.
Oh, Jefferson.
The mango jewel pods were the hot shit.
That's nefarious then.
The mango jewel pod was going after young kids,
and then now the beers are going after the jewel teenagers.
Yeah. I think that Yingling being Pennsylvania, they should have done something Pennsylvania specific like a Scrapple beer.
Yeah.
Scrapple is not what I'm thinking.
I'm thinking Scrapple is a sort of broken up apple pie.
Scrapple, I've never had it, but I believe it's a breakfast meat that's sort of a processed loaf.
Mishmash.
I like the broken up apple pie.
That sounds great.
Like it's the scraps of an apple pie.
Scrapple.
I've definitely broken up apple pie on my plate while I'm eating it, so I've kind of had that.
Have we talked about this?
You putting cheddar cheese on your apple pie?
Jesus, no.
I've never done it, but people do that.
I don't know where.
Cheddar cheese?
Cheddar cheese, American cheese, something.
You know one thing that I thought was gross that i remember from all of our pasts is
remember like little packs of snack crackers yeah a common flavor combination was cheese
crackers with peanut butter filling yeah oh yeah and like thinking now cheese and peanut butter
that's fucking gross oh yeah that shouldn't work and if it came out now you'd be grossed out but
those keebler packs are a staple it works i do think the uh the um cheese ones are a lot better oh yeah hey but that's my two
seven cheese filling oh no cheese cracker with cheese filling yeah yeah it sounds great oh
peanut butter and cheese oh that's that okay what else on booze news mikey you got stuff
yes i do okay this is uh this is an old one this is from the super
the super bowl a couple weeks ago we saw tom brady throwing that pigskin to his friend gronk
yeah well you probably noticed it was a lot of firsts in that whole game blah blah blah
one of the firsts in uh the advertising was it was the first Super Bowl ever that
Budweiser did not have an ad.
Whoa!
They gave
all their ad money to like
a COVID vaccine awareness campaign.
Good. But, so you hear that
and it's like, wow, without the
Super Bowl, without Budweiser, that's crazy.
And then at the end of this little article I read
it was like, but they have um advertisements for bud light bud light seltzer coors their whole
michelob ultra you know their whole like stable and stuff oh so don't worry about them i hope they
have success with this covet awareness campaign because i personally just am not aware about any
i haven't really heard much.
When I go clicking around, I can't find anything.
I think a big part of that campaign is like trying to get people to know it's a real thing
or that it's not like a hoax.
Yeah.
Like getting celebrities to do it on TV and stuff.
There's also this thing with if Budweiser could let one Super Bowl go without spending
millions on advertising
and then discover that it didn't affect their sales whatsoever yeah i think people would like
drastically overthink how much we spend on or how much they spend on advertising um okay my second
piece of booze news is kind of a remember we did the uh bull shot weeks ago? Oh, yeah. D-lish. Well, all my news is going back a little while.
So, you know, Red Danson, a friend of the pod who told us all about the Bill Oakley Diamond Jim Brady.
Sure.
Yeah.
I used it on The Simpsons.
Well, he hit up the Sloppy Boys Instagram and said, you know, because I was complaining about my bullshot.
I did not enjoy it.
He said, okay, so question about the Worcestershire sauce you used.
Was it in the fridge and or did you shake it super well before using?
The anchovy oil in there can separate, especially in the fridge, and ends up coming out funky.
I did not know about that.
And if you can guess, I did not have,
it was in the,
it was not in the fridge.
No,
I'm sorry.
It was in the fridge and I did not shake it.
Ooh,
you got to shake it,
Michael.
I didn't shake.
I didn't shake.
Yeah,
not a shaker.
Next time I make one of those,
which I probably won't ever make one of those again.
I will try to shake it.
I bet it's better shaking and it would solve that problem,
but I can't imagine it changing it enough for you to love love it like yeah I can't imagine spending some time being like okay
I'm really gonna nail this beef drink yeah but hey shout out to the red dancing he's the man
hey we love him um and Worcestershire is made from eels and vinegar is that right he said anchovies
oh anchovies anchovies so it's anchovies. Anchovies. So it's
pretty gnarly even to begin with, but I love it.
Yeah, me too. Okay.
My final bit of booze news, which is
a product.
Look at this.
Oh my. A seven
ounce Miller High Life bottle.
Can you believe it? A cute
squat, tiny little
bottle. Where did you get that, Mike?
I got this just at a corner store.
They had them.
I said, what is this?
They said, oh, you got to try this.
You don't happen to do a podcast, do you?
I do.
Is it about cocktails and drinking?
Well, you son of a bitch, it is.
That's nice.
I wish I had one of those.
It's great.
Well, I went on the Molson Coors website,
and it's got these reasons why these are better.
One is because it stays colder, Jeff, a big problem you're always having.
Wait, why is that?
You finish it faster.
It's smaller.
Yeah, you finish it before it gets hot.
So hot.
Hot.
Yeah, sometimes if my beer is like a 22-ounce can or a 40, by the time I get to the bottom, it's boiling.
And then it suggested this.
Another good use for these things are beer moses.
You split one of these into two champagne flutes and add OJ.
Have you ever heard of such a thing?
No, but that sounds great.
It sounds like a brass monkey.
Champagne of beers man um you know where i've seen those squat little bottles before um there's a
thing in the midwest i want to say maybe started in wisconsin where when you have a bloody mary
it comes with a beer bag a little shot of beer and i had it at nye's polonaise in minneapolis
and then i had it a few other times and sometimes
it is it's very fun when it comes in that little squat bottle he's like a little sip of this little
sip of that what's the drink that has like um it's like a tropical drink maybe a bloody but
it's got like a corona in it coronarita upside down with the with the the Corona beer extending up out of the normal drink because of what,
however they do that with physics and surface tension.
Those are like at Dave and Buster's and similar chains.
Those are the margaritas.
I don't know who started it.
But it's like,
instead of having a lime perched on the corner of your glass,
you got a whole ass beer and it's like filling the thing as you drink it.
As you drink it.
Oh yeah.
Adding new liquid. And then you could also pull on the bottle it goes what can else oh when i was looking uh looking around online about these little uh
pony yeah they call them pony bottles sure uh they also call them splits which is a term
associated with champagne and since this is the champagne of beers, it makes sense. But they also were talking about something called, Miller used to make Steinies.
Do you know what those are?
No.
It's, you know, when you see like in the late 70s or 80s in a movie or something,
the beer bottles were like squatter, but it's still a 12 ounce beer.
No.
I don't think so.
It's, it kind of, it looks like this.
It's got like this shape, but it's just like
squatter. Anyway.
Is it shaped like
a bowling pin and it's a pinner?
I wish, but it would be like this
long.
Steine.
Steinfeld. Oh, that could be
it. So that's my little
tidbit. Hey, what a
great segment of booze news.
We're going to close her down and wrap it up with this.
I'm auditioning yet another booze news theme song for you guys.
A new one.
Ooh,
nice.
Give this a listen and tell me what,
uh,
if you want to keep it.
All right.
Hmm.
Dish of the dirt.
Dish of the dirt.
Hey,
gather round. We're dish of the dirt. Pretty good. Dish of the dirt. Hold on. Dish of the dirt. Dish in the dirt. Hey, gather round, we're dish in the dirt.
Pretty good.
Dish in the dirt.
Hold on.
Dish in the dirt.
Hey, gather round, we're dish in the dirt.
It's booze news, you greasy little shit.
What do you think?
Wow, pretty good.
Pretty good, pretty good.
It's stuck with the same, or you stuck with the same formula, I guess, huh?
Well, I shortened the hi-hat intro and I added some stand-up bass.
Okay, okay.
That's pretty good, Tim, but I'm curious to see what the Slopheads can come up with.
Me too.
Well, folks, you heard it here first.
We're summoning Booze News theme songs.
Send them in to thesloppyboyspodcast at gmail.com. And that're summoning Booze News theme songs. Send them into the Sloppy Boys podcast at gmail.com.
And that's it for Booze News.
Yeah.
Can you top the tea, man?
Don't top the tea.
I'll say this right now.
If we use one of your Booze News theme songs on the podcast,
you get $100,000 sent to you in the mail.
Oh my god.
We are so fucked.
I haven't checked our Patreon income
recently, but I don't think it's that much.
It's $100,000 and
they will get it. All of it.
Clean swap. There you go.
And that's cash.
May the best songwriter win.
Okay, now we have a drink on this.
We hit up the IBA list for this drink today, right?
Yeah, we're back on list.
We're back on track.
Back where we belong.
Back on the list.
Who's had it?
I've had it.
I drink it all the time.
I've not had it.
I've had one once.
I already have questions about this drink.
Ooh.
Well, let me tell you, the Negroni.
Yes.
Here's what's cool about it.
It's Italian, right?
This is a Italiano.
This is a Cafe Society cocktail.
So if you're like Hanford and you like to spend your afternoons kind of
whiling away the hours at a cafe,
swapping bon mots with all the literary minds.
Elites, yes, elites.
Then this could be the drink for you
because we're talking equal parts gin,
Campari, sweet vermouth.
I do have to say, when you, you know,
I love doing that.
I love hanging out at the cafes,
talking to the literary elites.
Their minds fascinate me.
I find myself sitting there doing a lot of listening,
and I don't really have much to say to them.
I wish I could keep up.
A lot of times they'll mention somebody,
ooh, Hawthorne?
Okay, I'm not sure who that is.
You're just kind of silent for the whole afternoon.
When I go home, I need two Advil and a nap, actually.
Okay, well, Mike, I'm going to hook you up with some CliffsNotes,
and you're going to be good to go.
Good. The origin of the Negroni
is in 1919.
There's this guy, Count Negroni.
Oh, uh, uh, uh.
He
waltzes into a cafe in
Florence and he wants to
have an Americano, which is
Campari vermouth soda,
right? A weaker drink. in italy they like the weaker
drinks um and the hey the americano i think it's called the americano because americans were
importing a lot of vermouth from them at that point and mixing with things but we'll get to
that someday because that's on the iba list and we'll do a whole episode but this guy negroni
he doesn't like the americano he says to the bartender at this cafe in Florence,
you know, I just spent a lot of time in America,
and Americans like stiff drinks, you know?
They're drinking the Unforgettables.
Oh, yeah.
The liquor-forward cocktails.
Do we ever.
So here's how he wants to kick up his Americano,
and he says, no soda, gin.
Whoa.
Campari vermouth.
Mmm.
Gin.
And he drinks it, he loves it, and then the bartender starts making it,
and everyone says, this Negroni is kind of cool.
It's hit.
Soon, it catches on in America.
We were influencing him.
But then, you know, in the 60s, it's like you think of the kind of movies.
Rome is kind of a cool, in the 60s, it's like you think of the kind of movies. Rome is kind of a cool thing in the 60s.
You got Sophia Loren kind of doing her thing.
And then it becomes a staple for cool, smart, elegant, cafe kind of people.
Nice.
But then it hits its peak decades later.
That sucks.
it hits its peak decades later.
That sucks.
Let me flash forward to a little time you may recall called April 2020.
What?
Springtime in America.
The sloppy boys are putting the finishing touches on the mix for their soon to be hit album Paradiso.
Bring this up.
Take this down.
Turn that way down it sucks and you know uh hey early
pandemic everyone's kind of cooped up and a certain video hits the internet and sets it aflame
where a certain character actor is making a negroni go ahead and play the clip. What are you going to make me?
A Negroni.
Would you like one?
I would love one.
Does he sound familiar to you guys?
No.
Thanks.
No.
You didn't see this video?
I didn't see it until more recently.
So, a Negroni.
You got any guesses as to who this man is?
No, I can't.
Martin Short?
We've talked about him on this very podcast.
Oh.
Shaloobs, buddy.
Shaloobs, buddy.
Oh, Stanley Tucci?
Stanley Tucci.
Stanley Tucci is making a Negroni for his wife,
and he kind of looks good.
He's in really good shape shape and he's flexing his
yeah i'm dead his uh biceps while he shakes it so you see a lot of comments they're kind of like uh
you know uh hey destroy me toochie daddy
but then he he goes on uh you know he's on the today show making him he's on the Today Show making them. He's on the Cordon making them. Then the internet is
critiquing them. You got
YouTube cocktail connoisseurs
doing a redo video
or no, what do you call it? A rewatch
or whatever. Rebuttals or whatever.
Play this clip.
Shake it up.
He's shaking his Negroni.
Stir your Negroni. Stanley Tucci,
you're well put together.
You look great.
You can afford to get a stirring mixing glass for your Negroni.
What a dork.
That's some guy who actually has a good YouTube channel and makes some,
I forget his name, the cocktail aficionado or something.
But everyone's talking Negroni, Negroni.
You can't walk down the street without someone saying oh the tucci drink is the big thing now um and now it's kind of having its
peak with this podcast and here's my feeling on it i feel it i can feel in the air the excitement
yeah my thing when i order a negroni and here's what the slop heads are listening you're probably
thinking this drink has nothing to do to me, nothing to do with me.
There's no reason I would ever want to do this.
Here's what you do.
You go, it's Italian, right?
So it goes with Italian food.
Next time you're out at an Italian restaurant
and everyone's ordering the house red,
oh, the house white, you know.
What do you guys order when you're having italian food
where you drink wine uh gun to my head i'm getting red wine but you know i don't i don't like gun to
your head i don't like it i do a nice cab oh very nice yeah i i get in a cab if someone orders red
wine i'm out of there i use i used to do peroni and then i started doing wine but now here's
everyone's place in their orders, telling
the waiter what they want. It gets to me and I say,
hey, Negroni.
And oh, you should see the faces
across the table. Hey,
I used to hate Tim and now I'm
impressed with him. The whispers. He got
a Negroni. He got
a Negroni. He must be a literarily.
He looks awesome as
well. He looks like Stanley Tucci.
And they say, what's even in it?
What is in the Necroni
he ordered? And then I stand up and I slam my
fist on the table and I say, according
to the IBA, 30
milliliters of gin, 30
milliliters of bitter Campari, 30
milliliters of sweet red vermouth.
So equal parts. Make it how big.
You love those equal parts.
Bing, bing, bing, done.
Pour all ingredients directly into a chilled old-fashioned glass filled with ice.
Stir gently.
Garnish with half orange slice.
So that was the thing.
Stoochie.
Stanley Tucci.
Yeah.
The abbreviation.
The Stooch, man.
Common abbreviation.
The Stoochster.
He shook it and then served it up, and that's why he was getting that tongue lashing.
So today we're going to stir them and have them on the rocks.
Oh, I hate to stir.
I love to shake.
Now you say this goes well with an Italian meal.
Do you guys consider a polio string cheese to be Italian food?
Yes.
A mozza, fresh mozzarella?
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
I like a nice, a fresh string mozzarella.
Yes, yes.
You go down to that polio factory and get it
as it's just coming off the line.
I like Chef Boyardee.
I like to have the beef farroni from a shitty can.
Guys,
this High Life 7-ounce
is gone, forgotten. It's
fast. Was it cold all the way
down? You know it,
my man. Looks like Frosty the
Snowman over there. Oh,
should we go make these drinks? Let's do it.
Yeah, okay. I got questions when we come back.
Hard-hitting questions. Oh, no.
You got questions. We got answers. We'll questions. Oh, no. You got questions.
We got answers.
We'll be right back.
The Sloppy Post Podcast.
We'll be right back.
Hey, folks, we want to pump the brakes on this episode and talk about a great podcast
called Bizarre Albums from our good, good pal, Tony Thaxton.
This is a great one.
Tony explores the weird side of music, celebrating and telling the stories behind those strange
albums that make you wonder how and why they exist.
He does deep dives on albums released by pro athletes, actors, fictional characters, and
those albums where musicians or bands just took a crazy, weird left turn.
The episodes are short, digestible.
They're 15 to 20 minutes, We're full of pop culture trivia
nuggets. You'll hear stories behind albums by Bruce Willis, Shaquille O'Neal, Macho Man Randy
Savage, Freddy Krueger, and many, many more. And he even does an episode on Ham's Brewing Company.
They put an album out in 1965. It's really great. New episodes drop every Tuesday, everywhere you
listen to podcasts. Tony's got a Patreon. That's great. So do yourself a favor, drop everything you're
doing right now and go listen to Tony's podcast, Bizarre Albums. It's fantastic.
We're back, we're back.
Hey, whoa.
This is red, like a big cup of marinara.
I know.
Mike, is yours as red as ours?
Yeah.
It's just kind of a weird glass.
Did we accidentally use marinara?
There was a jar that said ragu.
Here we go.
Clink, clink.
Bottoms up.
Uh-huh.
Ooh.
Mm-hmm.
That's a taste.
Yeah.
It is a taste, isn't it?
I love it.
It's bitter.
It's Campari.
It hides the sweet red vermouth that I think is the worst ingredient.
Kind of tastes like a big glass of Campari. That Campari turned the whole thing red, but it's a bitter brew.
Now, you got, did you get bitter Campari? Yeah. I could only just find Campari turned the whole thing red, but it's a bitter brew. Now you got, did you get bitter Campari?
Yeah.
I could only just find Campari.
Okay.
So I was in the Campari aisle and I found, I could, I didn't find anything that said bitter Campari.
So I got.
What about bitter Bacardi?
I got Luxardo bitter, which is the same thing, more or less.
It's like Luxardo brand's version of Campari.
Yeah.
But, yeah.
It would be funny if you were drinking a big bottle of bitters.
No, it's, yeah, this is alcoholic.
Oh, I checked.
So what's the difference between Campari and Aperol?
I think Aperol is sweeter.
Because they were next to each other at Albertsons.
And the only Campari option I had said bitter.
So I went for it.
But I was like, Aperol, I've seen that more than I've seen this bottle that I'm grabbing right now.
Well, because a couple of years ago, Aperol Spritz was the talk of the town, baby.
Now this to me tastes like,
does yours taste a little ashy or something?
Mine tastes a little gross.
There's a little like taste that's like,
I don't know about that taste.
I want to say it's got that licorice anise quality to it
a little bit.
It's not strong.
It's sweeter than that.
I'm not getting any licorice.
I'm getting just, it's red,
and it seems like it's going to be a sweet thing,
and then it says, no, I'm bitter.
Nice try.
I bet you by the end of this drink,
I'll be singing a different tune. Yeah, sure. But initially you're saying, if it strikes you as too bitter. Nice try. I bet you by the end of this drink, I'll be singing a different tune.
Yeah, sure. But initially you're saying
if it strikes you as too bitter.
Yeah, I don't know.
I don't know if it's just the bitterness,
but not my favorite
taste at the gate.
My first thought is ashy.
It's ashy.
Okay, are you drinking out of an ashtray i did it begs the question well it was a cup it
was a cup i dug out of a fireplace and i that's an urn oh grampy gimgam and swift foot foot. Meemaw and poo poo.
What did you guys I see y'all got oranges as
requested.
Can I tell you can I give you a little inside
trick here. Mine's a clementine.
Ooh.
Not me. Classic
navel.
I had a bag of cuties
and I decided to cut one up. Yeah I got a bag of cuties right here on this zoom.
I'm looking at it.
Come on.
Hey,
I was setting you up Tim for that.
Thank you.
Um,
the IBA said to use an orange slice.
So I did that,
but I feel like normally you see it with a expressed twist.
Ooh,
Tim.
What?
Um,
I also think ours came out red that because maybe the vermouth we're
using is not too dark or something
like that because usually Negronis are
very dark
this is like neon red
this looks like fruit punch
yeah
I want to be
having the taste of fruit punch in my
mouth here but it's just ash
so wait you're not getting a sweet bitter having the taste of fruit punch in my mouth here, but it's just ash.
So wait, you're not getting a sweet bitter thing. You're just getting ash.
I'm getting the sweet bitter taste, but it's also the, the aftertaste is ashy.
Can you smell that Luxardo bitter bottle and see if that's what ashy on its own?
Cause I'm very curious. Oh, he put it up his butt.
Hold on, I'm going to take a little... And now it stinks for some reason?
Oh, he shuddered.
Oh, this stuff on its own is
bad news.
Maybe this is the ashiness.
I can't tell now. I got so much crap in my mouth.
Did you maybe,
did you get a curse put on you?
I hope not.
Was Campari the thing you brought to
Maria's holiday party?
Yeah, I brought in a bottle.
I waved it all around the room
and nobody wanted any
and I drank probably half of it myself.
Tried to get a buzz going.
No takers.
Jeff, to go back on your curse thing,
I don't think I was cursed,
but last Halloween,
a woman dressed as a
witch on October
31st cursed at me.
Oh!
That's a powerful one.
I was kind of hoping to come up with something funny
as I was saying that, but I didn't.
I think you did.
I think you did. I would have laughed harder, but I was kind of hoping to come up with something funny as I was saying that, but I didn't. I think you did. I think you did.
I would have laughed harder, but I was Googling to see if there's such thing as bitter Campari.
And I just saw normal Campari and then something called bitter Carpano, which sounds like a parody written by a sketch comedy writer.
Slide me some bitter Camparno.
Am I on the silly comedy website here?
Yes, that is the silly comedy glossary.
Mad Magazine.
Mad.com.
No, so Campari is just Campari.
There's the only, the one, it's an aperitif.
It's made from like a bunch of different fruit and stuff
in Italy.
Herbs,
cascaria, chinotto,
all kinds of stuff bubbling down
into a dank brew.
What's the proof on that thing?
Ooh, that's a good question.
40?
Okay.
Respectable proof.
This is 25. This, this is 25.
This Luxardo is 25%. Oh, so that's a little harsher.
Very curious.
I'm liking this.
I order these and they're always bitter and I like them because it's a type of bitter
I like.
But I feel like in general, like when we had the Manhattan the manhattan all the sloppy boys were like and then when we had big
cream circles we were like hey yeah these are kind of good dessert type give us some brandy
alexanders and some golden trees uh but i think most people like i was talking to my brother about
the drinks he likes,
and he says he likes a harsher drink that slows you down,
that has something kind of a little bit of a rank taste.
A little edge.
A little edge so that you sip and you think.
Right, right, right, right.
Meanwhile, the sloppy boys are just throwing back hurricanes and barfing.
You know what's a funny thing, thing too about the Negroni.
I kind of realized, I think it took me a while.
I've mentioned before that I had only ever had them up
and then I saw Neil Campbell get one on the rocks
and I copied him and then I liked it.
So I like him more than rocks.
But I realized that I had a stumbling block
with the word Negroni.
You know, when you have a nonsensical aversion to something,
uh,
you have a bad association.
Um,
there was a lady in my school,
my grade school,
Mrs.
Negron,
who yelled at me all the time.
Like,
uh,
she was like an,
she was like a hall monitor and,
and she would make us before.
She was a Tim.
She was a power tripping bitch no
she's probably a nice lady and i was probably a little bastard i was i uh i think i was friends
with her kids and stuff like that maybe she's a wonderful woman but she used to do this thing
where like before you could go out for recess she would make us line up in the hallway in the school
instead of just like walking fascist but then it was like two by two and then we all had to be silent and we all had
to like like she put her hand in the air and we all put our hand and like before playing kickball
why do you have to be yeah why do you have to be quiet when you're the whole point of recess is to
let kids go nuts it's because you animals need structure. Anyway, I bet the first
200 times I saw Negroni on a menu
I was like, Mrs. Negron?
I don't think so. I'm here
to have fun. The waiter comes over, you're like,
I'm not putting my hand up. He's like, sir,
I don't. And then the waiter's like, Tim,
quiet down.
I'm going to eat my
orange slice. Oh!
I can't because I have a clementine.
To the dome.
That's delicious.
You guys ever have those candies
or it's like a dried fruit type thing
where it's like an orange slice
and it's all sugary.
They sell them at Trader Joe's
and you can kind of eat the whole thing.
Yes.
Love them.
Those are good.
Are they actual oranges
or are they like the candy orange slices?
I think they're actual oranges.
Ooh.
That sounds great.
Oh, I know.
Yeah, they're not like gummies or something.
It's not like the big-ass sugary gummies?
Those are good, too.
No, no.
Yeah, they're all good.
Gummies, everything.
I'll tell you what.
I don't like mixing fruit and chocolate.
Like whenever I see like, ooh, I got a chocolate orange, I'm like, pass.
Interesting.
Hard pass. No, I say. I agree. I think they're better separate.
Why double down? I say pass it to me. I'd like to try it.
Not into chocolate cherry. I'm not into chocolate. And those are the big two.
Hey, you know what I did recently? I put
peanut butter on Clementine segments.
That's fucking gross.
Segments.
Mouthwatering segments.
Mike, you just tell me you didn't do that
and you're just being a shock jock.
All right.
I'm just trying to get upvotes.
Well, you ever make a PB&J with marmalade instead of jam?
It's kind of like that, I guess.
Ooh, PB&J all the way.
You don't like it? No, come on,
Jeff. You don't like a little banana
with peanut butter? Of course
I do. Okay, banana and chocolate?
Those are natural bedfellows.
So are those.
Peanut butter and chocolate. Yeah, great.
So what's your issue,
dude? Fruit and chocolate. You don't like chocolate
on fruit, but you will eat it on a banana.
I tend to agree.
I don't like, you know, like black forest cake is chocolate and like raspberry.
Cherry.
Yeah, raspberry.
Or I would just rather have the berries separate.
Although I do enjoy indulging in a little Turkish delight.
What?
You're a Greek delight.
You got gotta keep them
separated. Hey,
since we're doing
fruit talk, Mike.
Welcome back to fruit talk.
Mike, you said
last week, hey, there's no
apple juice cocktails and there should be
apple juice cocktails.
I thought those were very
insightful, kind of out of character, formed a complete thought.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I see you say something like that around the, you say something around that to the literary
bigwigs that I hang out with.
They don't like it.
You go to the cafes of Florence and say, hey, how about an apple juice?
They're talking about a poetry book.
Hey, do you guys think there's an apple juice drink?
Well, you said that and we laughed you off as usual,
but a few days later,
me and Jeff were getting tacos
and you know the selection of the classic Mexican sodas.
There's like the Coke.
There's like the sangria one.
There's like the Coke. There's like the sangria one. There's like the Haritos
orange.
And then there's an apple
soda in a glass bottle that's called
Mundet.
M-U-N-D-E-T.
Apple soda. I was drinking
that with my burrito and
I turned to Jeff and I said,
apple soda?
This would be a good thing for a cocktail.
I was like, hey, imagine that the, it's autumn time, the leaves are falling.
Uh-huh.
Yes.
I'm watching the World Series and then I reach for maybe like an apple soda and bourbon.
Ooh, bourbon. Ooh, bourbon.
You choose bourbon.
That would be kind of nice.
But an apple juice and bourbon?
No, it's an apple soda.
Apple soda and bourbon.
I was kind of punching up your idea.
Hey, look at this.
I googled Mundet cocktail to see if anyone has used this apple soda.
And there is a drink called the senor brown
and it's just shit in a cup no it is um it's apple soda with mezcal you know smoky mezcal
hey interesting weird choices both of you i don't know what i'd put in a uh
in an apple drink what do you mean both? I have not come up with a drink yet.
No, no, no.
Both the mezcal and the bourbon.
Oh.
Well, and Mike hasn't offered any.
So you're just kind of sitting there on the fence waffling.
Me?
Yeah.
Non-committal.
Yeah, I got a real hard choice coming up, but I don't want to bring it up to you because
I think you guys will freak.
I think gin could work.
I'm starting to get into the gin, guys. Anything
could work. Vodka and apple juice could
work. I like gin in cocktails
because gin, it's
kind of the,
it turns into a bit of a chameleon. Think
of this drink we're having right now.
Yes. Campari,
vermouth, and gin. I don't taste the
gin whatsoever. I don't taste the gin whatsoever.
I don't taste a hint of the juniper.
Oh, actually, I just bit down on a big clump of juniper.
Oh, Tim, I'm so sorry, dude.
I think, remember earlier I said this is, I had one of these once before.
Did I tell you about that story when I had one?
It sounds familiar, but what are the details
this was before covet happened i said probably the last like concert type thing i went i went
to the lizzo concert sure cool and lizzo lizzo's great puts on a hell of a show and then i'm
afterwards in the got a little backstage you got to go backstage and hang with the gang
and hang with uh all her friends and
the crew and the dancers and stuff and it was great we're hanging out we're we're drinking
we're maybe doing a little something else maybe some smoking i don't know i don't want to say
so we're having some fun you're having a little bit of a hem. That's right. That's right.
And one of her dancers, Chris, was doing this funny thing.
He was doing this funny Sylvester Stallone impression.
It was like spot on, but he was being really funny with it.
Cool.
And I'm not even going to try to do it, but he was being really funny.
And, oh, I should, a little backstory. Right before the concert, I went to this really like sketchy burrito place.
And I had, I got something off the menu called the rattlesnake burrito.
And I was like, oh, what kind of meat's in it?
And they're like, we can't tell you, but it's really good.
I was like, okay, you can't tell me what it is.
And they're like, yeah.
And then they also mentioned something about like, it comes with a lot of beans and something about the
refrigerator breaking earlier that day and you don't know what they said but they mentioned
something along those lines along those lines so anyway cut back to hanging out with lizzo and
her friends who i was hoping they would become my friends because they were all having such a great
time oh chris and the gang yeah chris the dancer he's doing the impression we're all laughing i laugh a little too hard and i let out a little
bit of a squeaker yeah and just audio though just just huh just sound came out i wish just sound
we're talking brown air you know it was we've been in that situation where you kind of have to
oh what the hell was that yeah and lizzo looked over me and she's like mike what happened what's
going on and i you know i sort of built up my courage and i i uh i said this
you said this yeah this is good yeah i pull my pants down check for turds like what are you
doing i think i shit myself pants down checking for turds oh god it stinks
pants down i feel like a turd you You should go do this in the bathroom. Gotta change myself.
Pants down, unlike a nerd.
It's fine, just please. Think I shit
myself.
Gotta change myself.
Stop, yes, I know.
Get out of here. Gotta change
myself. Go change.
Go to the bathroom and change.
I think I shit myself. We know, go change. Gotta change myself. Would change. Go to the bathroom and change. I think I shit myself.
We don't. Go change. Gotta change myself.
Would you please just get out of here?
Here I go.
It's disgusting.
Rude.
Wow, you said all that?
I can't believe you said that.
What did she say?
Yeah, I said it.
I said it.
It was, well, I did it and I said it.
There was a thing that you said that I missed there was unlike a nerd.
I'm like a nerd or?
Yeah, a nerd wears his pants really high,
but I was pulling my pants down so I could check.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Oh,
that makes so much sense.
Cause yeah.
Unlike a nerd.
So you had your pants down.
Got it.
And those other voices that were like,
go get out of here.
That was probably like that guy,
Chris,
Chris.
And again,
it's some of his friends.
Uh,
Lizzo didn't comment.
She was just like,
you know, a face in palm, like, fuck this guy. She was probably like, I'm not going to go there.
I'm not going to touch that.
Yeah.
It's embarrassing, but also like, get the fuck out of here.
So that sucked.
But that was the last time I had a Negroni.
Well, I mean, I hope that that doesn't sort of like taint the drink for you and you can still enjoy it.
No, no. I love this drink.
So it's a good memory.
Folks, we'll be right back.
And we're back.
Final thoughts on the Negroni.
Ooh, Jeff doesn't have any final thoughts on this one.
I've got a lot of thoughts.
Guys, guys, guys.
Guys, you guys are my guys.
Just tell me what you fucking think. All right, so this tastes like ash to me.
What does ash
taste like when you say that?
What are you thinking when you say ash?
Bitter gumbari.
Oh, there you go.
Is it smoky? Is it wood
like? No, no, no, no. It's like
a very stinging
taste that
is not bitter. I know bitter.
I should know better, actually, than to have this drink again.
I will not probably order this myself again.
I hate to say it.
There's just other drinks out there that I can go to that I like better.
Yeah, there's lots of other drinks out there.
I'm getting used to this.
It's okay.
But sorry, Negroni.
Yep.
I'll say I will echo my friend's sentiments.
It's fine.
I got to say, though, Tim, not even appointment only.
This is a no for me, dog.
You wouldn't even make an appointment for it?
No, I would not.
Wow. If somebody was saying, hey, it's Negroni night, for it? No, I would not. Wow. If somebody was
saying, hey, it's Negroni night, I'd be like,
I have other things to do.
Really?
Do you blame
the vermouth
or the Campari?
Well, I was never a huge fan of
vermouth to begin with,
and the Campari ain't helping.
I'm having a second round and when I mixed it up, I ran out of, I only
had a little dribble of vermouth left and it's weird.
The Campari is even more bitter because I didn't, it's not as diluted now.
So I guess the vermouth was doing its job in the full cocktail.
I, I do like it.
I would have a second round.
I like,
uh,
I guess I'm more of a cafe society kind of guy than you guys are.
Yeah.
Maybe,
maybe.
Yeah.
I will say this.
Perhaps.
I don't think I like the IBA's recipe or,
or maybe I have the wrong vermouth because every other Negroni I've had in my
life has been better.
They're usually really dark and you can't really see through them,
and they taste fancier.
This one is just like electric red and kind of sweet and bitter,
but it doesn't have the depth that they always have.
I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
Interesting, interesting.
Well, question for you, Tim, since I just bought a $30 bottle of Campari,
what else can I do with this thing? How do I get rid of this stuff I just bought a $30 bottle of Campari, what else can I do with this thing?
How do I get rid of this stuff?
You bought a $30?
I got a little nip.
Cap and Cork had the little $2 nip.
Really?
Yeah, you're fucked.
We're going to have to look through because honestly, this is the only.
This is like the primary usage of a campari i guess my best recommendation would be
like to bring it to a holiday party and then have drink it with i was having you know i was having
was just campari and soda so rocks campari soda stupid drink i don't know what else to tell you
on the bottle it says like enjoy it on the rocks. I can't imagine enjoying it on the rocks.
Let's look into Aperol because maybe Aperol is like this with just more sugar.
And if you put sugar, you could have yourself a nice spritz.
Ooh.
Could, is Campari something that can hang out for a while?
Yeah.
Like the vermouth, since we're in vermouth month,
we should probably talk about vermouth stuff. Verm doesn't stick around very well nope you got to refrigerate it and you get
two maybe three months out of it campari forget about it let it gather dust we really should be
doing vermouth month because yeah we got the stuff yeah the first and the last. We finished it off, though, because here was the problem.
When we had Manhattans, I did not buy sweet red vermouth.
Jeff did.
And then he came over and he poured me a few ounces, which was very kind.
And then he cleaned out his fridge and he dumped the rest of the bottle.
Yeah, I hated it.
I just bought a whole bottle for this thing.
Well, you had a poison bottle that
made you barf before right so i had to get rid of that now i got a new one and i gotta sit on this
it's gonna make me barf for the month i'm not taking the hit for this we need better communication
mike yes you have a surplus of vermouth here's what you could do that would help the pod.
Have yourself a sweet vermouth on the rocks with a twist,
which is the Andy McDowell drink
from Groundhog Day.
Tell us if it's gross.
Okay.
Then we can make fun of her.
Okay.
That'll be my thing to do.
A twist is what?
A twist of lime?
Lemon?
Lemon.
Lemon traditionally.
Lemon.
Or you could just drink straight, neat vermouth like Hemingway.
Oh, right.
Well, I do hang out with his types of people who enjoy that.
Him.
You tell them about apple juice and they all roll their eyes.
They say, Hanford, we don't know why we keep you around, but we do.
Well, that's it for the Negroni.
Let's read some mail.
Hmm. I can't believe
we got through that whole episode without saying,
and a bony Negroni.
I thought we would say
my Negroni.
My Sharona.
We didn't say any of the stuff we should have said.
Tom asks,
Hey,
sloppy boys really enjoyed the bullshot episode in the talk about savory
cocktails.
Not sure if this is a real thing,
but in the Larry Sanders show,
rest in peace,
torn always talked about drinking salty dogs,
which I'm pretty sure was just vodka with salt on the rim.
Would you ever consider reviewing that?
Baba Booey, Tom.
Well, I think that's someone who works for the Howard Stern show
and we just got Baba Booey.
I just Googled it.
It's gin or vodka with grapefruit juice
and a salted rim on the glass.
Ooh.
I would do that. Do you know how to do, how do you and a salted rim on the glass. Ooh, I would do that.
Do you know how to do,
how do you do a salted rim?
You,
you turn the glass upside down when it's a little,
you get it a little wet,
like you dip it in a little plate of water or something, and then you put it on a plate of salt.
Ah,
yes.
Before the drinks in it,
Mike.
Wow.
Look at this.
Even on the Wikipedia for the salty salty dog it says it was a
favorite drink of arty the producer played by rip torn on the sitcom the larry sanders show
tan wow tom he really came through for us well now wait a minute wait a minute wait we have
passion fruit stuff yeah what if we did a passion fruit salty dog yeah well that let's do that. Well, that's not salty.
It's sweet.
Well, no, but we put the salt instead of the grapefruit juice because no one has that.
That could be a Hanford original.
All right.
This would be something I'd be willing to do, you know, as a side piece of an episode.
Wait, so grapefruit and what was the other one?
Gin or vodka.
Oh, but it's grapefruit
either way. Grapefruit
juice? Either way.
Salted rim? Either way.
Highball glass?
Either way. Tom, we'll think about
it. That does sound interesting. We'll think it over, Tom.
I like it. I like
the sound of that. Me too.
And that's our show. Follow us on
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And a special thanks to Jeff
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for listening folks see you next week happy vermoose bye everyone Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys