The Sloppy Boys - 200. Ouzo

Episode Date: August 16, 2024

The guys celebrate 200 episodes with shots of a traditional greek aperitif! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

hey folks welcome to the sloppy boys where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love i'm jeff dutton along with mike hanford oh and a happy 200 to you jeff and tim Kalpakis what is up Opa Stylies yes happy 200s all around and Opa Stylies of course amazing can you believe we made it this far no it's funny because the year markers

like 52 episodes is a year oh right right right right so it's like it's this awkward thing where episode 50, you think cool, and then, but it's not your year or anniversary, not yet. And then episode 100 is big, but episode 104 is, I guess,

bigger then. Right. That would be weird to be like, 104 everybody! When is our four-year anniversary going to be? October something? October 12th or something like that? Yeah, something like that.

It was like the middle of October. October 19th, I want to say. Is that crazy? That's not crazy, man. You're the memory man. You know what? It's October 19th. But more importantly than that is when is Talk Like a Pirate Day again?

September 19th. Oh, you have to track that. That's probably what I'm thinking. Well, can you remember? Because that's one day probably what I'm thinking. Well, do you remember, because that's a one day before my mom's birthday. So just remember, our matey, it's almost Tim's mom's

birthday. Yep. Yeah. Yes. Our matey, we have to get a pinata ready for Tim's mom's birthday. Let's do a Jolly Roger. Shiver Tim's mother. Yes. Land ho, it's Tim's momiver Tim's mother. Yes. Land ho. It's Tim's mom's birthday's Eve.

It's amazing how we, with the, it's almost, there's so much stuff going on that it's almost lost in the shovel that we're, Oh my coming up on a fourth anniversary and a talk like a pirate day, having a 200th episode of the show almost got lost in the shuffle of the fact that we have so much going on. movie is out the documentary feature-length documentary about

isn't it crazy and people are watching it off the launch pad finally my dm my dm box is filled with congrats dude this rules dude congrats oh it's marty uh congrats marty get the get back in the delorean buddy and get out of my life. No, not that Marty, though. Not that Marty. Oh, which Marty? But that's another cinematic Marty. Scorsese?

Scorskeski himself. Scorsese. Scorskeskiano. We should make sure to say Scorskeskiano. I did a show last night. Actually, let me tell you about a show I did here. I'm in Minneapolis, Minnesota. That's why I'm in a hotel room. I did a show last night at the Park let me tell you about a show I did here. I'm in Minneapolis, Minnesota. That's why I'm in a hotel room.

I did a show last night at the Parkway. Great group of people came out. It was a Sunday night. I want to tell you this. The power went out on the block or in that building like an hour and a half before the show. And I got a text from the guy who was running the theater that night said, our power's off. Hopefully, we'll be back up by eight. The show was supposed to start at seven and i said oh okay and i kind of took a long a while to get

to the like sort of lazily got to the theater got there at about 7 15 he's like okay uh we're all pretty much set to go in about five minutes they had put up a they got a generator from the restaurant next door a cord was going all the way into the back of the theater and they had big floodlights, floodlights on the performers. And it was so funny because it was this big old stage and it looked like, it looked like, uh,

like a, a Pink Floyd movie, like scene from Pink Floyd where someone's just like cotton on the stage. It's like, you have to perform for us. It was like all industrial. Like you're performing at like a FEMA thing. Yeah, but it went great. Like you have to perform for us. It was like all industrial. Like you're performing at like a FEMA thing. Yeah.

But it went great. Are you not entertained? It went great. And actually about 10 minutes left of my set. Uh, the lights came back on. Oh, maybe it's because it's,

it's one of those generators that's powered by laughter and applause. Yeah. We just had to get it. We just had to build it up. Yeah. It was one of those generators. Like Tinkerbell. Yeah. Um, that build it up. Yeah, it was one of those generators. Like Tinkerbell. Yeah.

That's really fun. Mike, did you get your Juicy Lucy that you were hoping for? No, I did not. Fuck my life. And here's why. It's because I got up today at my hotel and I got a late check. I got a one o'clock checkout. The guy pushed it for me.

It was very nice nice and then i was like i had to pick up the ouzo for today or the drink of the day which i had a tough time finding and then i went over to the mall of america and i had to drop off my rental car so i just never got around to it sad too bad i like that you chose pod business over personal pleasure now mike did you have any cheeseburgers just normal cheeseburgers i didn't have any i don't think i've had any cheese here actually no curds not yet when you were in wisconsin i haven't really oh wisconsin i had some cheese in wisconsin but just like from a store but not a deep fried curd no sad too bad yeah to be honest with you i forgot about the juicy lucy though but okay well i shouldn't have brought with everything else going on what's it like uh you've been crushing on the road it's a solo stand-up tour are you seeing slop heads at the shows are you talking seeing slop heads on

the show what made me think of it somebody just said uh you gotta get no somebody said uh scorchettiani oh yeah and uh last night at the show i look look out in the audience. I see a big, bright, brat green Sarbina Carpinterini. Oh, one of our best selling shirts. I cut myself short in the middle of a joke. I said, hey, nice shirt. That rules. Everyone go to the sloppy boys dot com and buy our cool shirts. Speaking of Sarbina Carpinterini and brat summer type stuff as it as it draws to a close here uh here's

something amazing that you missed mike well you've been on the road crushing mingling with slop heads and stuff uh here's what's been happening in old los feliz california um a charlie xcx spotted on hillhurst in front of Blue Bottle, right? Right by Cevichio, right by the Yeasty Boys truck. And I go, hmm. I go, hmm. Interesting. Tim, are you saying spotted by you? No, no.

Spotted by Paps. I wouldn't recognize her, Charlie XCX. Oh, you would. She would have been pointed out to me, I think. She had big sunglasses, black sunglasses on, but the hair kind of gives her away. She has like big curly black hair. She's got big hair right there was an instagram like uh it was on like you know like xcx fans instagram or whatever and then it said like charlie photographed in uh in los feliz so i i put my

my peepers on it real close and i picked out oh if that's that's blue bottle on hillhurst then here's you didn't see oh. Oh, you got from the... Exactly. But I did do the detective work. Like, I walked past Blue Bottle the next day and said, Oh, Tim, he's giving you credit for the detective work. Thank you. That's just as good as taking the photo as far as I'm concerned.

Exactly. Let the photogs do their work and let me do the... I've got the pins on the map here at headquarters. Here's what's going to blow your mind. in the map here at headquarters. Here's what's going to blow your mind. Did you guys hear about last week Charlie XCX's birthday party?

No. Can't believe I wasn't invited. I even said publicly. I'm here on the pod. Well, not publicly because it's behind the paywall. I like that album. I can't believe. Yeah, that's weird that she didn't reach out. Kind of strange. We haven't checked the sloppyboyspodcast.gmail.com in a while. Or the PO box, if we're being believe. Yeah, that's weird that she didn't reach out. Kind of strange. Well, we haven't checked the sloppyboyspodcast.gmail.com in a while. Or the P.O. Box

if we're being honest. Yeah, maybe she wrote a big letter. Well, we famously have never checked our P.O. Box and a year passed and everyone got their stuff mailed back to them. We learned nothing and we're doing it for a year or two. Let's take a look at that soon because I think somebody at the Chicago show said

they sent us something. Yeah, people sent us cool stuff, like really good art and THC seltzers and all kinds of stuff. And we're just fucking dumb. I mean, I could walk there in five minutes, but I forget every day of the year. Hey, set an alarm. Anyway, so this was like a very, it was like a big thing on Charlie's birthday. Like, it was kind of more of like a promo event than a birthday party because Lord was there. No, that's, that's a Simpsons episode song.

Thank you. Voiced by Michael Jackson in the dialogue, but not on the singing for copyright issues. Right. I always kind of forget. There's a weird, like tricky thing there. There's a legal loophole. Yes. Loophole. Right. I always kind of forget. There's a weird, like tricky thing there. There's a legal loophole. Yes.

Loophole. Yes. Legally. Anyway, this, this was, this was all over the internet because like Lord was there and then they like played brat at the party. And then for that song,

guess like, I mean, uh, uh, girl, so confusing, uh, Lord and Charlie were like dancing together.

I was taking pictures. Oh, they, you know, here they, they, they. Water under the bridge. They worked it out in the remix. And then Billy was there. And they played like Guess. And like, this was all the, Glenn Powell's there. All the, all the, Sabrina Carpenter was there.

Okay. Now listen to this. We're talking the big ones, Mike. Glenn Powell. Yeah. He's the it guy right now i haven't seen twisters but i will he arrived on a twister guess this was the poshest event on earth guess where it took place

doms little doms good guess tenants of the trees oh, dude. I saw that. I saw it on like Dumas or like one of the Instagrams or whatever. And like a very famous person was in front of the very recognizable Trader Joe's sign. And I was like, that's fucking tenants of the tree. Hyperion. Yeah. And then didn't you say they read, they gave that place a facelift or something? They did something. It's a very hip coffee shop during the day, and then it's like a club at night. And I had heard that it was always sort of like a weird vibe. It had a bad reputation.

In the old days, it was just a little bit dark and angry, and then it closed, and then it reopened, and I hadn't back. I had heard it was just like very elite, like a Hollywood-y club, and it was weird that it was in Los Feliz. But yeah. We should go.'ll go in there we just walk in well we're here oh elite we should go well get out of here off we go we're leaving no guys the movie's out we can do anything we want now yeah well yeah i'm surprised well if the movie had come out a month earlier we would have been at that uh xcx party i know it i just know it well now that we're film guys we could

probably just like walk into any amc cinema and sit down watch what we want and they're like oh why stop there any lot tim yeah walk right on the lot say cut action cut everyone cut let's come on. Just relax. What are we doing here? I just got here. And let's go in again. Back to one.

I'll tell you, speaking of AMC theaters, I want to get this episode over with quicker than usual because I want to try to get over to an AMC tonight and see. Shing. Ooh. Deadpool V. Wolfman. It's so funny that you haven't seen it, Mike. You were reporting on this in Booze News for a year. You begged me for updates.

All my reports were just, Jeff, you got to find out. Jeff had to find it out. You couldn't figure it out where and when. Jeff, you've already seen it, right? Yeah, of course. I saw it a day long time ago. Well, I almost had a chance, but I just didn't take it. Well, I should see it too, and we should do a blowout because I don't want to watch it, but we've...

Oh, can I rant about something? Ooh. Yeah. You know how Ryan Reynolds, who I publicly despise... Sure. Not me, love him. He does commercials for Mint Mobile. And I heard,

oh, and then he was doing commercials for Jack in the Box. And here's this commercial on Kiss FM. It's like, hi, I'm Ryan Reynolds from Deadpool and Wolverine. To promote our new tie-in with Jack in the in the box i'm gonna do some sexy asmr and then jack cuts him off and goes um never mind uh let's just end the commercial uh you're gross it sounds like jack yeah a jack stone was weird and very like uh kind of very shaming

what's going on with the tone jack but asmr is a comedy reference fuck off like i feel like yeah yeah full years ago any any person doing like if you had to do like a branded corporate video for a celebrity you'd be like one of like if i had to write up 10 ideas for a page of some bullshit i was pitching like idea number nine on every picture you do asmr yeah of course and and like asmr is like the novelty is worn off it's here to stay as just like a genre of youtube and spotify and the people that like it like it it's it's the idea there was no joke to it other than what it was, like the very concept of it. Sure.

But Tim, see, the people, they're not over it yet. See, people like you and I, yeah, and the listeners, yes. The glisteners are over that sort of thing. They're just getting to the community chest now. Yeah, we're on to the next. But most people, ASMR is new, new, new, and funny, funny, funny. Funny. And funny, funny.

The mere mention of those letters makes you LOL. It's an ASMR LOL. I had something else I was going to rant about, but I'm going to save it and put it behind the paywall. I want to ask you guys something. Did you guys see in the Olympics? Have you been watching the Olympics at all? No. Of course.

Of course Jeff doesn't watch the Olympics. Insane. I had it on a lot, like on the TV, but I didn't comprehend. I just had it on. Yeah, yeah. I think I was saying. But did you see the thing about the French guy who did the pole vault and his big bulge got in the way and it

knocked the bar down. No. Whoa. He was this French guy. His dick was too big and he went over the thing and it knocked the thing off. Oh my God. And it was like that was like the news story. It was like French pole vaulters private parts

or his bulge. But it's like dude uh come on man they had to have had a camera on that like in slow motion be like yep it was his bulge but it's like a huge dick but it's like if you're gonna you know the the pole vault we all know you gotta like just barely make it over you gotta get everything as flat as you can up there, bud. This is why the three sloppy boys should become pole vaulters. We won't have that problem. If anything, the pole will be getting sucked up into the vacuum of our crutches. Wow, the pole is more secure than ever after we see the sloppy boys.

The pole architect is like, oh, my God, I've never seen it this strong in my life. You three have done it. Thank you, boys. Thank you. Your parents have created the perfect pole vaulters. Well, do we get into some booze news, please? Yes, it's time for booze news. And let me just say, this booze news theme comes to us from Slopheads, Chris Finke and Danny Noonan from the Sloppy Boys Discord

and they very cordially offered me a short version. Politely, they said they know I like short themes. But I like this theme so much that I want to play the long version. Bip, bip, bip, bip, bip, hit it. Ooh, nice. Bloody Mary. Daiquiri. Espresso Martini. Oh, nice. Tom and Jerry. Rum and Coke. Whiskey Sour. Black and Jam. Penicillin. Manhattan.

Seal Buck. Giant Dream. Aviation. Bees Knees. Blood and Sand. The Monkey Gland. Dark and Stormy. Sea Breeze.

Ascend, Expand, and Conquer. Oh, I see. Ascend, Expand, and Conquer. Spicy Fifty. Zombie. Rum Chata. Negroni. Socky Bomb.

Vesper. Alabama Slammer. Cure Beer. Paradise.oni. Saki Bomb. Vesper. Alabama Slammer. Keir Beer. Paradise. Water. Abasola. Nine Tide. Dirty Shirley.

Southside. Yellowbird. Horse's Neck. White Lady. Sazerac. Last Word. Mudslide. Hugo Spritz.

Blue Hawaii. Cranberry. Margarita. Rimmus Piss. Randy Crustup. Calpe Cordial. Orange Wine. Cabernet Sauvignon.

Ascend and conquer. Ascend and expand and conquer. I can't think of an ad anymore. Rusty Nail. Casino. Champagne Cocktail. Green tea. Bay Breed.

Long Island Iced Tea. Dive Cart. Cider. Angry Balls. Godfather. Eyeball. Singapore Sling. Ferrari. Strawberry Daiquiri.

King Charles. Hortel. Naked and Famous. Orange Whip. Ferrari. Strawberry daiquiri. King Charles. Hortel. Lip. Naked and famous. Orange whip. Mojito. Coquito. Cantarito.

Tuxedo. A Sunday Santa conker. Suffering bastard. Cuba Libre. Boulevardier. Three Wisemen. Angel face. Here.

Org. Vieux Carré. Pickle martini. O'Doul Southern sipper. Rocket fuel. French martemen. Angel Face. Here. Org. View Carre. Pickle Martini. O'Doul Southern Sipper. Rocket Fuel. French Martini. Russian Root. Corpse Survivor Number Two.

Golden Dream. Hurricane. Hanky Panky. Paper Plane. Gin Fizz. Get a Sea. Barracuda. Tippa Betty.

Pickle Back. Black Lagoon. Death in the Afternoon. Brand New Old Fashioned. Sweet Martina. Between the Sheets. Before. Us and Expandina between the sheets oh my god yeah send retain damn uh uh send, and conquer.

Thank you, Stinky Finky and the Noon Mom. That was very good. That was, wow. I can't believe they did them all in order, too. That was from... Can you see? This is what is possible when people collaborate, when people come together.

This is Finky X Noonan, the official collab. That's great. The whole is greater than the sum of its, the official collab. This, that's great. The whole is greater than the sum of its parts. They probably watch blood, sweat and beers. And we're like, we can collab too. Yeah.

It inspired them to collab. I love making, making it be like, make it, putting them in the spaces so that it lands on, it'd be like Fento. There's one, and the one that was like,

it was like orange whip. Why is that so funny? Like each,'s it's it feels like an like when i laugh at people doing good impressions yeah it's it's like why is it a laugh response yeah i don't get it because i mean i love it i love this and i love when people do good impressions but i just uh physiologically i don't know what what what it. Why is rhyming so satisfying for a human to hear? And that we go like, we laugh like, like when you're listening to like hip hop, you laugh at the cleverness of a rhyme. Even if it's not saying something funny, it's just like, Oh, the closure is rewarding. Yeah. Like, like a pattern.

We're such little babies. This is stupid. Why do we respond like that? And maybe, maybe also in this this situation it's a little like also with an uh with a impression you're we know like we've heard these words before we've heard ourselves say them yeah so it's just it's funny to see like how they fit together i don't know why i just don't know why that was great we'll get to the bottom of it I don't know if physiologically was the right word to use back then. Way back then. Well, it's in the past now, Mike. Nothing you can do about it. All those seconds ago.

Oh, God. That was really great for episode 200, too. I feel honored. I feel wistful. Can we assume that that was all the drinks we've done? All 199? All the ones that rhymed. Well, I wouldn't go the ones that rhymed. Well,

I wouldn't go, I wouldn't go around assuming that sort of thing. Yeah. I didn't, I don't think I remember hearing them alert or the Chicago handshake. Well, maybe they made it before that episode dropped. You never know.

You never know how long it took me to find that theme in the inbox of the sloppy boys podcast at gmail.com where you send your booze needs to the themes now open now accepting themes yeah a lot of email addresses are closed i'm like what the fuck i mean our p.o box was closed what time is these emails closed um okay uh today's top story and booze news comes to us from mitch on the web and uh this is some sad news that we're going to turn it around. We're having a celebratory day here where it's OPA time.

It's, it's 2200th episode, but this is from Mitch on the web. The same Mitch on the web I saw in Papa, Michigan. Oh, fuck. We had a good time.

Didn't we Mitch? How far is Papa from Detroit? I'm not sure, but during the Papa show, I said, so who's from papa and everyone nobody everyone was like nobody nobody was uh nobody lives in that town whatsoever huh i um speaking of michigan i've been wanting us to do a drink called the boston cooler which is uh

ice cream and ginger ale verner's ginger ale you would think it would be from boston because it's called boston the boston cooler but no it's from detroit odd peculiar rather peculiar um okay today's uh the the news story is uh story and we gotta turn this around we gotta turn lemons into lemonade on this one yes because here it is champagne sales slump due to lack of celebration and joy in the world industry execs say can you believe that this is a recent headline in the new york post aka the gray lady's nemesis um here i'm sending you guys the the article in the chat uh so the ceo of a major luxury brand company this uh lvmh said that there's been a dip in sales worldwide because quote uh champagne is quite

linked with celebration happiness etc maybe the current global situation be a geopolitical or macroeconomic does not lead people to cheer up and open bottles of champagne um that's interesting that's it's quite a leap um good sir this is just like those articles you see where it's like millennials are killing golf courses they're just simply not spending their time on the golf course right well actually i left off at the end of this quote it is when he goes you know uh does not lead people to cheer up to open bottles of champagne i don't really know but hey maybe this is the problem uh maybe champagne sucks and it's too expensive michael probably be it could that possibly be the fucking reason michael yes it has nothing

to do with price i've seen you drink free netflix was it netflix netflix one sent us bottles of dom for free and you didn't like that did you was that mine well mine was i blew it up in the freezer i put it in the freezer that was ifc right that's a fucking 300 bottle i forget but that was like a yeah that was a very nice bottle and I ruined it all, but I don't drink that shit crap so that's alright by me. I'm looking at this now and I kind of agree, Jeff.

It has a little tinge of thanks to what's going on in the economy with if you let Kamala in the White House there will continue to be a lack of joy kind of a vibe coming up yeah that's it's whack we celebrate we celebrate in our own way people celebrate all the time they celebrate with shots tequila weed i think champagne is just like out of style because it's

a little stuffy or something i feel like fancy champagne might be out of style. I feel like there's so many spritzes that like a mid-level Prosecco is probably booming. No? A mid-level Prosecco. A mid-level Prosecco. Mid-level Prosecco hanging with a non-alcoholic gin. We should get you in that Chalamet movie, Mike. That was good. I know. That would be good. It's too late late they've locked the cut they're in post oh they announced that they locked their post well

and also i mean you know guys it's that's the chalamet has the dylan role so even if we got mike he could have been inspired by that line he could have overheard mike saying something like that yeah but that's not what happened with bob d. We don't know exactly. No, exactly. I don't know. I haven't seen the film. You could play like Woody Guthrie and you inspire Timmy C. Oh, yeah. Hey, Bob, maybe you could sing like me

if I had a hammer. Hey, we should watch that Chalamet thing when that comes out. That's a good one because it's boomery, but it's also kind of young because it's it's timmy c it's an interesting uh yeah i don't know what it's like his early dylan's like early stuff right he's shuffling around greenwich village i'd like to i'd like to see like the the sets and stuff yeah it's like lewin davis but minus the interesting part of it being about like a mediocre musician guys i love lewin davis do i did i suspend my

disbelief well i guess not no no i didn't i wasn't worried about the cat that was my thing i wasn't i wasn't worried about the cat but when lewin davis is in the car at night and he's like they're driving and he's like my son lives in that city i haven't seen my child in years and then he like doesn't stop and see his kid i was like oh that's good this is a good movie too sounds like tim is getting his old guts wrenched out by it looks like tim's tim tim has strong feelings about like one day wanting to be a deadbeat dad that's gonna be me one day i'm gonna be on a west coast live podcast tour oh that song that alex cameron song stepdad came up in my uh my uh spotify recently that's such a good song it's so funny yeah that's great it's like a nice guy step get stepdad who's getting kicked out of his house

but he like likes the kid yeah i love uh i love uh marlon brando and i love divorce divorce strangers kiss oh candy may yeah well is that it for booze news wrap it up feel good yeah it feels good i got no pain in my neck man feeling good it's good enough and with booze news out of the way uh shrinking into the rear view as we like to say around here we find ourselves barreling headlong towards the drink of the day the brakes have been cut the steering column does not work. This is like the movie Speed. I am leaning on this brake lever. Nothing. It's like Speed 2 Cruise Control.

It's like Speed 2 exactly. And I know the listeners think, hey, hey, pull the e-brake. What e-brake? Oh, no. Fuck. Yeah. Okay. The drink of the day.

Before you say that, Tim, can i tell a quick story it's the quickest story ever okay oh an anecdote yes jeff hold on real quick i just said anecdote you should put out a book called the anecdotal dutton and it's just little stories that you have yeah the anecdotal dutton could be a a column or even a blog people are doing blogs now like this would be chapter one i'm loading in groceries can't find a parking spot in my neighborhood, right? So I just pull in just a little bit into the driveway, you know? And I shuffle in the groceries and I'm putting them away. I come back down and I see that my car has rolled back into the street.

Whoa, Jeff. And this is like a nightmare I've had, like where I think I didn't put my e-brake on. I did put my e-brake on, but not enough. I didn't give it a real tight tug. And the ass of my car was like five feet out into the street. It was terrifying. So you had it both. It was in park and then also the e-brake? Well, it's a stick shift. Stick shift. So it was in neutral and then also the e-brake well it's a stick shift

stick shift so it was in neutral and then the oh okay okay so that e-brake is and the e-brake just wasn't fully clenched huh that's uh a good thing it didn't get hit or hit somebody jeff uh well there was that guy um is it anton yelkin was that his name oh yes that actor that's how he died he got pinched in between a car, right? Yeah, because he got out of his car to go to the gate and get mail out of the mailbox or something. And the car rolled forward. And it rolled forward and pinched him. Sheesh.

That's terrible. Yeah, isn't that awful? I remember I had just seen the... It was soon after the Star Trek movie. He was in one of them. And he was the big thing. That's tough. He was in one of them and like, he was like the big thing. That's yeah.

That's tough. Um, when I was a little kid, I think I must've been before I was three because it was in an old house that we lived in before I moved when I was three. Uh, I remember I have, have memory of like being in the car seat in the back of the car and my parents, I forget who it was, went in to go get something. And the car got out of park and rolled down our hill. Oh, God. I just remember from the back seat, like I can picture it. Like going back and forth.

Freaky, man. Oh, man. Yeah, I did this once before. I had an old Saab in high school. Cool. And I had a steep driveway. And I came out, and I saw my car had rolled down the driveway, which has a curve, and it had gone off the driveway and like backed into a

tree. And I got my friend's truck to help me like, not even tow it per se, but just like yoink it back, you know, a couple of feet onto the driveway. But man, it's dangerous out there.

That's not something you can forget to do. You know, you can forget a lot of things. Do that. He break folks. Anyway, back to the drink of the day timmy take it away that's a good little psa yeah um well uh but the drink of the day uh how about this guys opa you've heard you've said you've heard i've said. Oprah Winfrey. Uzo, you've had.

Not had. Never has it touched my lips. You've heard. Heard, heard, heard. Not even heard, Tim. Oh, so when I pitched it, when we're talking about what's a celebratory thing for the 200th episode, and I said, how about Uzo, this was your first time hearing the word? Blissfulful ignorance tim jeff you you hadn't heard of uzo that's funny yeah it's hilarious it's the way i find like impressions funny it's like yeah and rhyming yes it's it's funny when

either jeff doesn't know a spirit or um okay, well, Jeff, let me ask you, not knowing anything, only simply knowing the word. And then I guess having, I assume having bought some, take a wild guess. What do you think it's going to taste like? Yeah, I know. Did you look into it or you just have, you just assume? No, it just says on the bottle. And I was like, great. This is like my eighth one of these bottles I've bought. What does it say on the bottle and i was like great this is like my like eighth one

of these bottles i've bought what does it say the bottle jeff that tipped you off go ahead go ahead oh wait jeff did you go to cap and cork yeah i did i was gonna i was gonna try and split with you or something i was just like i just needed this to be the quickest run ever and so yeah same with me i ran out of time i just, I went in there and grabbed a bottle like right before this. And the guy was like, geez, who's those? Someone just bought it. Yeah.

Is it this one? Yes. That's what I got. Oh shit. Great. That's awesome. You know what? I bet.

Cause I went to three different liquor stores and two of them didn't have it. And they both were like, Oh, we haven't had that for a while. I bet this is like the only Uzo that people carry anymore. There was another one at Cap and Cork, but it was weird. the most popular one was called like uzo 12 or something like that i forget but this is this was a beautiful bottle i was i was hoping to get a bottle look like that but um well if you don't know well so that's what jeff knows mike what do you what do you know about uzo

uzo i i think of it as something that is Sambuca-ish. But I think that's just because I think of it in that area of the electric store. It was today on the shelf right next to the Sambuca. Well, I'll tell you that Uzo is probably the most divine liquid on earth because it comes from the most magical land of all. Yeah. Hollywood. Let me give you a little backstory and uh uh milan can you give me a little copyright free greek music here and uh ideally something that's kind of that plucky mandolin type of a sound well you could use uh he could use uh sloppy boys i mean it's greek music yeah all. Oh, hey, we should end this episode with Smashing the Plates.

Yes. Perfect. That's great. That's good. Okay, Milan, hit it. Oh, yeah. Oh, nice pick. I mean, are you sure this is copyright free?

Wait, this is Milan. This is Milan playing a little lute. I can hear his fan going in the background. Put that fucking thing down. Fuck off. Okay that fucking thing down. Shut the fuck up. Okay, here we go. Socrates. Plato.

Aristotle. Calpacus. Galifianakis. Stamatopoulos. Vardalos. Elizabeth Stamatina Fay aka Liz Lemon Chet Hanks No

And of course who could forget Jennifer Anastanakis Before she became ashamed of her Heritage and chopped off the End of her name and nose Chopped off the end of her nose Her nose right off the end of her nose yeah her dad yeah she got a nose job and i'm shaming her she didn't look like um chris farley in dirty work she got a good nose job um well didn't we we watched uh the the leprechaun uh and she had her big schnoz.

Anyway, she's a wonderful Greek. But here's the thing, guys. Like I was saying, Socrates played out. The Greeks have always been great thinkers, right? And it started off with philosophers, then gradually transitioned to comedy writers. But the comedy writers had great... They were philosophical in their own way. They had great wisdom

in their satire, you know? There's another way of saying this, Tim, that I feel like you're tiptoeing around, but go ahead. I'm Greek? No, I feel like every fucking boner is like, yeah, comedians are actually the modern-day philosophers. No, because it's not all comedians, Jeff.

The Greeks were the good philosophers, and then the Greeks are the good comedy writers. I see what you're saying. I don't know why I mentioned Jennifer Anastogos and Chet Hanks as part of my list of great thinkers. Well, Chet Hanks, though, I mean, that's a surprise to me. Yeah, well, his mom, I've been to the L.A. Greek Fest, and his mom, Rita Wilson, is Greek. And so Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson will be there. Tom Hanks is very involved in the Greek scene, even though he's not Greek, but Rita is.

Is there a Greek scene? Oh, yeah. Huge. is very involved in the greek scene even though he's not greek but rita is interesting is there a greek scene oh yeah um huge actually uh this year i i was uh i was in i was in pittsburgh with you guys and uh and i got a very nice text from uh uh comedy writer alex scordellis and uh he was like hey uh me alissa lim paris and ge was like, hey, me, Alyssa Lim-Perez and George Basil are all going down to the LA Greek Fest. Want to come? And I was like, oh, fuck, I'm on the wrong coast. I love there being this little comedy mafia of Greeks.

But great thinkers, philosophers, writers, but then also guys, the Greeks invented the Olympics so the Greek physique, the athletic, I mean, you've seen the movie guys, the Greeks invented the Olympics so the Greek physique, the athletic, I mean, you've seen the movie 300, so you get the vibe. Warriors. And that makes sense because this is episode

200, so we're sort of getting there. Right. Two thirds of 300? Well, that's 200. But if you add all that up, the philosophy and the brilliance and then the athleticism you kind of see where i come from because i've got that kind of socratic wit but then i also i'm kind of like a like a sigma rise grinds rise and grinds guy who's this uh me ah

all right no i never really thought of you that way but i can i can kind of see that um but i do i do i'll just decide i do still i do pray to zeus every day and the the gods of olympus are that's my religion doesn't come up much this is this isn't a joke question is there anything in the greek world like modern greek world that like harkens back to the zeus gods and stuff like like do they the main the main religion in greece is like greek orthodox which is like splintered off of catholicism so I don't know but that would be cool but they still don't have like they don't have festivals and stuff for for Zeus or Hades even I'm sure not even Aries Olympus Fest yeah like the way we have I don't know this is a bad ring bear like

no like like oh I don't know Pucks aney Phil. We like to see what he's up to. He has no meaning in the world. Yeah, they let Zeus out of his cage. He's in goat form and he runs around a little bit. All right. He switched forms. Well, what we're talking about today is between the ancients and me and my contemporaries in the 14th century, there were Greek monks who invented uh this drink and uh it's it's a it's a you know what who's those made of no grapes it's basically like um similar to grappa

this is what when you have all the stuff that's left over from the wine making process because i also drink wine in greece all the stuff that's left over from the wine making process because i also drink wine and grease all the stuff that's left over from the wine making process you can can then like distill it down farther and you can make spirits with it but if you use that and then you also are throwing in other uh like herbs and flavorings in there for flavor yeah one in particular what there's one that's always there uh you can there's other ones you can throw in mint fennel cardamom coriander cloves but always present is that big fat stinky star anise so yes uzo tastes like good and plenty uh and black licorice like every fucking ever this one is this is nectar of the gods and it's a it's

blessed uh as opposed to like all the other bullshit we always drink um the name comes from um like when they were first like barreling this stuff up there was like some good ouzo was going to be shipped off uh like some like somebody stamped some barrels and labeled them in italian the phrase uso marsiglia uso and it means for use in marseille it's being shipped off to marseille and that signaled like superior quality like hey marseille ordered this so this is like the fancy stuff so they think that just the uso part of that became uso but then also more likely uh the turkish word for grape is uzum okay i think we got our answer but what's funny is you know that there's like a big rivalry between turks and greeks so it's possible the greeks are like no no no it no. It's not. It's not from the Turkish word.

But OK, so Uzo is typically enjoyed as like an aperitif. It's before dinner and it's very strong and very flavorful. So you typically dilute it like one to one with water. And oh, I've done I've been at like a fancy Greek restaurant. It's cool. They bring you a little kit where there's like a little cold glass bottle of water and a glass and you can mix it up most people do 50 50 but you can cuss it's customizable um and and perhaps we'll do a little bit of that on round two but right now we are celebrating our 200th episode so we want to celebrate and we want to say opa and we want to do shots we're doing shots of Uzo yeah who's it Nealon cut the music now let's wait till he does it okay it takes a while to get

to five seconds he's reaching turning the dial slowly down you want to put too much wear and tear on that dial um now because these are strong shots this is like 80 proof type stuff plus all the good and plenty taste um i told you guys to try to chill your bottles if you can but then i also googled and it says that shots are typically served room temperature to me that's pretty rough but uh yeah i don't i just in general i don't like room temperature like almost anything cold stuff cold things uh it like literally dulls the taste buds and you get less taste and it's nice is that funny to be like hey let's do some uh ice cold shots so we

can't taste it uh you guys have yours with you i'm just gonna pour mine yeah mine's unfortunately room temperature in a hot room so i'm to be dealing with the harshest of all. Oh, well, I got to... Well, are we going to take a break? No, we got to... We have to take a break. We got to play the ads. Of course, of course. But I got to pee, too. I should probably go to the bathroom. Oh, God, my TMI, bro. Pee, too? What is this?

A level of a parking structure? All right. All right, enough nonsense. Yeah, you're right. Folks, we're going to take a quick break, and when we come back, shots of Uzo at various temperatures. and we're back ready to pour up some uzo shots you know what's funny is that when you add water to uzo it's supposed to cloud up because of the anise but putting my bottle in the freezer also made it cloud up interesting look at that are you guys cloudy? Oh, wow. No, mine's crystal clear.

Hot. Boiling hot. Yeah, on the back of the bottle here it says, serve a water or ice. The crystal clear liquid turns milky white. I bet they put that on there so people who do that are like, wait, what just happened? The fuck? It also happens with all the anise

stuff. Absinthe and P no and when anytime you add water to any anise thing that happens oh you know what's funny when i went to the first liquor store the guy was like he was like no i don't think we have that or wait did we discontinue he's like what am i thinking the one with the sugar and i said uh yeah absinthe and he was like oh yeah that we don't have that either so it's, I think everything in this sort of world is not the taste bud up here. Yeah. I pour my shot pretty big.

I don't know if that's a good idea. Did you guys? I think so. I got a little brandy sniff to glass. Medium for me. Medium for Jeff. Well. I'm not looking forward to this.

I don't know if I'm in the mood for a Mike and Ike drink right now. No, no, Mike Mike it's celebratory It's 200 episodes of the show You heard that You're right The fire ascend Expand Expand

And conquer And retain That's very Spartan To that I say Opa. Opa. Ooh. It's so good and plenty.

Because it's sweet too. Oh my gosh. It's so good and plenty. Ooh, the staining taste. Ooh, it doesn't go quietly into the night. That taste. Yeah, it hangs out. Ooh, baby. entertaining taste oh it doesn't go it doesn't go quietly into the night that day who baby it's a funny choice to like doesn't that change things that i always tolerated this stuff because i was like well you know it's made from that's what it's made from but if it's like it's if it's really grapes and then they're choosing this flavor, maybe this is the one bad idea the Greeks had.

Who's Greek on? Is your mom Greek or both? It's my dad's side. My mom's Polish. And I never had ouzo around the house or anything. Actually, the first time I had it was in LA. My neighbor was Greek and just saw my last name on my mail. So on Greek Easter, it was like a week after Easter. Uh, the neighbors texted me, you found a bottle

of Uzo. Um, they invited me over and they were having a Greek Easter and we all like, uh, sat in a circle. Oh, I think I told you guys about this because very nice people and if they're listening i love you but um they uh we played cards again we played cards against humanity yeah and it was just very funny for me like hanging out with comedians all the time to then play a game like that where you're like oh the the cards are funny we're not you know there's no creativity involved yes dude i remember the first time i played that with like like friends from home or friends from college i forget what it was and i had spent you know 10 years in la at ucb and i was like i i was so puzzled by what the game was and like you're you're matching up

offensive or funny phrases. It's apples to apples. Yeah. And I was like, you know, in LA, like we come up with the funny stuff. We do the same stuff, but it's like, we're the ones kind of. Don't say it that way. You know, in LA out on the coast, we're creative. But so it was, that was funny for me.

It was challenging to witness, but I was, uh, um, it was nice to be invited somewhere and we all, uh, we ate some good Greek food and then we did a lot of shots and, uh, and I got pretty hammered and it was like the middle of the day on a, like a Sunday and we're getting tanked. So that was fun. And then, uh, you know, I, I gave him the, I, I was a good sport about the cards. Sure. Yeah.

That's fine. I'm sure you cleaned house because you're a comedian. Oh, my God. Finding all the best combos. Two jokes to pair up together. I'm not really sure how to play that game. You don't have to tell me how. We don't have to waste that type of time.

We should do a blowout of it. That would be great. That would be great. I would do that shit. We play the game on the blob that'd be fun let's do that there might be like a jackbox version of it that we could play digitally and not even need the cards oh can i tell you about this this is interesting the other day i was walking by i was in uh michigan pawpaw and i was after my show and i was walking around and i found a i stopped

at a bar had a little bruski oh Oh, and people were doing fireball shots there. And they were also doing Hennessy and Sprite shots, which I'd never heard of before. Oh, weird. And I almost was going to get involved and be like, yeah, I've never had that. But these guys were doing their own thing. Can I ask this?

You're in Michigan. I don't want to get involved. Was your beer a Strohs? No, I just got a Miller or something like that. No, but I was, so I'm walking around back to my little apartment, and I went past this, not a comic book shop. It was like a comic book shop, but only for D&D and gathering of magic cards. Oh, yeah.

Like one of those, like all the things that you can. Tabletop games. Paint and stuff, yeah warhammer so i i saw in the window that it was open i was like oh what is this and i went in and i saw in the middle these guys five guys were playing uh five guys we're playing we're playing magic cards and i was kind of looking around and i was they were playing and i was like hey you guys mind if i watch for a few minutes because I've never seen it like played before and it was so interesting to see these guys like I had no idea what they were talking about and it was just so like fluid and stuff it was really a world I've never seen at all before it was fun to sit there for a little bit yeah and about 20 minutes later

like it was they went around sort of like two times around the horn and then I just got up and left and no one said anything. I didn't say anything to them. They're too invested in their world of fantasy, Mike. They probably didn't even know you were. It was like two guys. I could tell two guys were kind of like undercutting each other a little bit. What's the word when you say something to someone that's like.

Passive aggressive. Passive aggressive. Two guys like passive aggressive. One guy didn't talk at all. The other guy hadn't played in a while and he was kind of screwing up a lot of stuff. That's fun to clue into like the interpersonal dynamics of it. I like that. I like going into stuff.

Yeah, go ahead, Jeff. No, it's like whenever we play like code names or like, you know, we have some friends who are like big into the games. I wish I have some. I have like Uno cards and stuff stuff but i've never once used them i like the idea especially when the game you where it really has to do with like knowing your opponent or like knowing the people in the room that's like that's like the added dimension that makes it like incredible uh but yeah it's i i just enjoyed going into like uh i'll do this in

new york anywhere just kind of pop into a like, what the hell is going on here? Check out a little subculture. Yeah. It's fun. That is fun. We should do a blowout sometime where we would need a talented dungeon master. But for an hour, we play a little Magic or D&D or something and come up with a fantastic world. Yeah, I played D&D once. It was back in fifth or or sixth grade i forget what

how about our old college pal randy he he is in a weekly zoom dnd thing with his friends from detroit and i think that like his brother or someone is he's not the dungeon master but he doesn't know how to be a dungeon master that's like a whole thing too you need like uh like somebody has to like set that like plan it all right like the story i think it sets the tone like so much like if you have a if the dungeon master is cool and smart and fun it's an amazing game and if they're like grumpy and not creative and stupid you have a bad time i i uh from titmouse tim where where what's titmouse does uh animation and stuff digmanman. Digman animation.

They, for on four 20, they sent me a, you probably got it too. It like a, a magic kind of set. I think it was just like the board or something like that. And it ends up a magic dice,

like a 12 side dice 10 side. But I was like, cool. I didn't get, I got a bong. I got a bong mug, like a tiki mug. That's a ball. I got a one hitter from that. Orong mug, like a tiki mug. That's a bong.

I got a one hitter from that or like one of those, like, uh, it's like this. Yeah. Like put the weed in it and you smush the one stash thing. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know why I got like, I was, I was like, yeah, I did a voice or two on Digman, but, uh, that I'm on the list for the four 20 gift. I voiced it. You Mike, you're Billy the Met. Sure. Sure. I know. I, I don't, I don't, I don't, I've voiced it to you, Mike. You're Billy the Met. Sure, sure.

No, I don't poo-poo that, but I've never, maybe I've just, I guess when I get you gifted stuff, like that bottle of champagne, I've ruined it, so I thought I was off the list forever. Man, you know what list we got to get on? We got to get on the Tom Cruise gift list. Oh, that guy's got to be, he's probably giving out some good stuff. What's he giving out? I hear, like, you get on that TC gift list oh that guy's got him he's probably giving out some good stuff what's he giving out i hear like you get on that tc gift list this guy's giving out like like gold yes no not gold bars is this a thing yeah yeah he's like famous for like he never forgets birthdays and he's got

just got like an incorrect a crazy generous little rolling thing of gifts. I think his assistant never forgets. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. But hey, Tom Cruise Inc. That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

Yeah. But also it's like, you know, you do a movie with him. You're getting gifts for like 10 years. I should have done that movie. He wanted me to be in the mission impossible three. And I was like,

I think this is probably the end of the series. Right. You're like, I don't want to be in the last one. I was like, I'd rather be in the first one. Like if we start, if you start a new series, yeah, I'll do that one. And you're like, I don't want to be in the last one. I was like, I'd rather be in the first one. Like if we start, if you start a new series, yeah, I'll do that one. And you're like, I don't know if I could shoot today because me and the Sloppy Boys are recording an episode of Bud Light Seltzers.

He's like, oh, the new summer, the new calling in from work pack. Well, I'll listen. God, not to make this whole episode about our old friend Randy,. Uh, but he, do you remember he worked for Tom Cruise for a while, but then he also worked, he worked for Steven Spielberg. I mean, he worked at Tom Cruise's like production company, but he also worked at Amblin and he worked for Steven Spielberg. And when he was, he was like Steven's like third or fourth assistant or something like that.

Yeah. An army of PAs and he was yeah but had like facetime well yeah for sure and what was cool about that i thought of because you mentioned gifts i'm sure you got great gifts but even just part of the job was um if you're working directly with steven he wants you to like have all the stuff he has so you know how to like use it so every time steven got a new phone, like the new iPhone came out, Steven got it.

And then he also would buy it for everybody in the office. So that if he was like, how does this work? They could show him and his fucking car. Like there was some fancy ass SUV was driving and Randy got to drive. They didn't like officially give it to him, give it to him. But while he had that job,

he was driving that same car. I forgot about that. And it was just in case like, you know, something in the dashboard is confusing. Yeah. Man. I remember, but the, the other side of the coin though, is that there was a fire that broke out on universal studios.

Do you remember this? Yeah. It took down the, uh, the hill valley. That's the furious. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah.

Oh, no. No. It's hill valley. Right. Right. on the uh hill valley furious right yeah yeah oh yeah no no tail valley right right and randy had to go to the office at like three in the morning and take the oscars out of steven's office right in case the fire were gonna was gonna was gonna breach amblin they were like get the oscars out of there randy and he did because he's a good he's a good guy doesn't he also in that in that office i think randy said he had the uh

rosebud sled yeah the prop i saw yeah i had a general meeting there and i saw it that's crazy definitely the forest gump bench as well something like that oh man yeah randy was editing a movie like his own movie in one of the um extra edit suites that's just like kicking around at amblin and i went in and watched it and like, you know, snacks in the kitchen is like out of control. And he said, hey. Lunches in other places. You want to see Stephen's office? I said, yeah.

I look in there. Original Norman Rockwells lining the floor. Like above where, below the floor. You wipe your fucking feet on them. They were like on the floor below where they were going to be hung. Gotcha. And then sure enough, you poke in, you see like a glass case with Rosebud in it. The sled from fucking Citizen Kane.

Crazy. Interesting. Norman Rockwell. I like, I'm a Rockwell fan myself. He's a, I would call him Americana in a way. How many originals do you have? I never got any originals. They were all way too expensive.

So the financials got in the way is the thing? Now, Jeff, are those big, like those New York, or those Sunday Post or Sunday Times, are those big? Yeah, I was going to say they they were maybe like, you know, almost like two foot by three foot or something like that. Oh, I thought they would be Sunday Post sized. Right. No, no, they're like a little bigger so when they can be shrunk down and have like impressive detail.

But I don't understand how they would shrink it down back then without a screen. Right. They didn't have Photoshop. What the fuck were they doing? Come on, Jeff. What are they doing? Hey, they could have just been matted and the frames were big and chunky. You know what I'm saying? Maybe they're taking a photograph. I think they're taking photographs of paintings back then.

Isn't it funny? Speaking of cool offices, I feel like a lot of the time my best jobs and the coolest things I've worked on were in very plain offices. And then my stupidest jobs were in really impressive offices and that's just how it goes like yeah funny you should you should coin a phrase for like the inverse property of yeah better office worse the thing my probably most embarrassing job but then nicest office office was for like two weeks. I was writing pizza box content for Domino's pizza boxes, but not for Domino's.

You might have to explain what that means. Yeah, hold on. I don't know. What do you think? So some kind of like tech company in Santa Monica was pitching. This was like in a weird little sludge patch where I was like, had no staff jobs. It was just like taking whatever weird job came along. Um, but had like a little bit of cred. So people were calling me. Um,

I felt like it was, um, so a guy who was like a comedy bang bang fan or whatever hired me and Lauren, uh, McGuire. And we went out to this uh like campus in uh santa monica and so it was a tech company that was pitching domino's pizza on this concept so it was all for this pitch and domino's we never went for it but the idea was they were getting a lot of numbers people saying that people are eating alone and that you know like mukbang is really big on youtube yeah so the this company was pitching dominoes on this thing where it's like if you order a pizza the pizza comes and there's a qr code on your box that you like boop your phone or your ipad

and then when you open your your pizza box you prop your phone or your ipad there was a way built into the box to hold up the screen so you're eating your pizza alone and you're looking at your screen and there's a first person actor eating with you with content written by tim kelpakis and lauren mcguire so we would come up with characters that was like this is a stoner guy who's eating pizza with you or like this is an italian mama who's telling you about the only girl and we just like we just wrote a bunch of scripts for a bunch of like people to have dinner with and and dominoes never went for the pitch but they were i mean yeah they paid me like a thousand dollars a day and i and i was just dicking around but then i remember I was like sitting on a yoga

ball and drinking kombucha on tap and cold brew on tap and like really like high ceilings in Silicon Valley office. And I was like, Oh yeah, of course when I'm running bullshit, I'm getting this treatment. And yeah, of course. Right. Right. Man. I love that office with like a ping pong table.

Like Mike and I, we, we found it. We run an office with a ping pong table. Nobody used it, but us. Yeah. We had a, we had, had a, Jeff, you never beat me. I think I beat you 50 games in a row. What the fuck? Don't say that shit. Don't say that. It's true, but don't say it on the pod.

We did have good matches, but I think I was, I shouldn't have mentioned that. What am I, what am I, Mr. Ping Pong all of a sudden? No, it's fine. You know, Mr. Table Tennis. Mr. Table Man. Season two of Birthday Boys writing in Glendale at the hollywood production center we had a a ping pong table up on the second floor like on an overhang out outside terrace yeah like like an outside terrace that was fun man oh tim that that dominoes oh first of all that dominoes thing like who even has the pizza box

near them when they're eating like you take the pizza out of it right and you go watch tv and then but also just like you're not putting your phone in a fucking you don't you don't want to put your phone in like a greasy little crevice that they put in a pizza box in a grease box and it's also quite like you sitting with the whole pizza in front of you and your phone. It's awful. Well, the pizza is the plate. The box is the plate. Yeah.

Oh, man, I should find some of those scripts. That thing of like you have to teach your you have to teach your consumer like a new things like, no, I just give them the pizza. Only like as big as mukbang was. It's not as big as ASMR. It's just funny that whenever an internet thing happens, companies are like, we do our little thing of ASMR. We can include an internet thing

into our food. Just let the food be the food in the fucking videos on the internet. And if your lonely loser clients want to go watch something, turn on their fucking TV. Also, how does that make you feel like if you're Domino clients want to go watch something, turn on their fucking TV. Also, like, how does that make you feel? Like, if you're Domino's, the company, we've noticed a lot of our people that order our food eat it alone.

They're the biggest losers on earth. Because it's the type of thing, like, anytime I have Domino's these days, it's alone. I got the app and it's like, it comes to my house. Yeah, you're not going to be like, it's Christmas Eve and the family is gathered and I order Domino's. Damn. I, uh, I, I'm not finding, uh, any, I found my freelance contract and the writer invoice that I sent, but I'm not finding any scripts. Your description of that job made me remember that.

And I don't remember any of the details, but this was probably, we didn't have the TV any details but this was probably we didn't have the TV shows we were probably just doing like some shows at UCB I got an interview to write for jib jab doing like this like greeting cards and I kind of I mean I went in I talked to him and I gave him some ideas but I kind of didn't even really understand what they wanted from me like what you would even write for jib jab so I don't think I got that him and I gave him some ideas, but I kind of didn't even really understand what they wanted from me, like what you would even write for Jim, Jim. Uh, so I don't think I got that job, but I do remember submitting a few things and didn't know what, what happened.

Well, what would you, what would you change about? I mean, we're not, we're not changing anything about the drink. We're just adding water, right? Yeah. I got some ice going. Okay. But guys get real quick. I didn't, I didn't find a script, but I did find some notes that I got and look, it looks like I'm from context clues, I was writing a script where it was a husband and wife were telling a story, but they had opposing views, and it was a Rashomon kind of a thing. Oh, Tim. Very pitchable. Yeah, that's not good.

Hey, guys, would you want to order some shitty pizza and watch a Rashomon parody? Who are they even talking to? These are loners. I feel like Rashomon always comes up in like clever little pitches and I'm like, yeah, but it never ends up being like a great show. I've seen the 200 sitcom parodies and I've never seen the play or read the

play. You know, like I have no idea. I'm sorry I interrupted. Are we going to do, I'm going to do water on read the play. I have no idea. I'm sorry I interrupted. I'm going to do water on this next round. Me too. 50-50? Yeah, I'm going to go grab my... I have some water in the fridge that's nice and cold.

I'm going to grab that and a glass. I'm going to put some water in. I'm going to put some ice in to cool it all down and see what we got. Love it. Nice. Folks, we'll be right back after this and we're back with round two uso i uh didn't want to add water and ice, so I did just ice. Yeah, I did a little less water. It wasn't one-on-one, and then I added ice.

Already cloudy, though. Observe. Oh, look at that. Yeah, like immediately. I'm doing 50-50 water. See, when I hear 50-50, I just picture a sick grind. Yes. I see one of my

favorite, I mean, I picture one of my favorite rappers in the mirror. M&M and M&M? Oh, shit. Oh, shit. M&M and M. Oh, I clouded up to milk milk milk levels of cloudiness here oh jeff yours

has a little like blue tinge to it in the daylight that's just the sun it's just the quality of the light fuck yeah there we go oh better colder for sure yeah oh yeah okay and and better diluted for sure but opah nonetheless opah yeah we've got oh many many opahs to all many opahs to all of you yes and to and you at home uh this is this is interesting i um i was just looking up uh ouzo cocktails and it most of them just seem like you take ouzo and put like mint or lemon in it there's not too it's like uzo and adding something else it's not like more liquor oh there's something good because i need to do something with the rest of this bottle no you're gonna have shots all the time and say opal when you celebrate no i want another what do you put in pineapple juice oh this one announced a

vodka uzo sour mix ice and club soda okay so i did the same google mic and i found the same results that it's like it's traditionally there are zero cocktails like you would only just have a shot or mainly drink it with water so any cocktail you're finding is like somebody who has a like a blog saying like i invented this tim i am ready to break from tradition they remind me of like the when i was looking for like halloween drinks and it was like the frankenstein blood drink it's like first you need a mason jar and some twine to make it's just like this is a craft blog this is a fucking cocktail site i'm designing marshmallows here i'm not making a drink where's the drink i do think that lemon would work and that's very greek

or mint or something i think would be good yeah Yeah, something not, like, overpowering. Is lemon Greek? Yeah, I mean, like, lemon is squeezed on everything in Greece. Is that why she's Liz Lemon? Yes. Oh, it is? Probably. I thought it was lemon because she was, like, a sourpuss.

Liz Feta. But, Liz, that's funny. When I said her name earlier, Tina comes from her middle name, Stamatina or whatever. But her first name is Elizabeth. So Liz is. Oh, okay. Oh, Tina comes from, what's the, Stamatina is the. Yeah, middle name.

But I just, I feel like I'm disappointed that the Greeks, when they, when they were deciding what to flavor their grappa with, they could have made a bombass limoncello type of thing themselves you know that could have been good or a feta drink um now jeff does this do you think uh you'll be joining tim and me on our greek adventure when uh after drinking yeah you have to because we're gonna do sloppy boys sloppy boys residency in mykonos oh i've been talking about going to Greece, but we haven't really brought to you because you hate to travel. No, he came around and he liked Chicago, so let's bring him to

Mykonos. Yeah, well, you guys always go to shitty spots. Oh, excuse me. Michael aghast. Shitty spots, he says to me. I think maybe the only spots we've been to is uh new york and las vegas those places suck no i i want to go to japan there was all this talk

of the sloppy boys are going to go to japan they're going to meet sonic no that was a tour not a vacation sounds like i've been doing a lot of talk talk talk and not a lot of action the tours are little vacations, are they not? That's true. That's very true. But here's the thing, Jeff. We're doing all the islands. We're on the islands.

We're on the boats. We're on the islands. But Jeff, here's what you're going to like. Mykonos, there's kind of Ibiza vibes there, okay? This is a clubby place. Now Jeff's saying, well, why don't we just go to Ibiza vibes there. Okay. This is a clubby place. Now, now Jeff's saying, well, why don't we just go to Ibiza?

This is where the, this is where the, the, the, the reality show about Lindsay Lohan's club was set there. I believe. Does she still have that club? We should go.

I think it went out of business on the show, but, um, that, you know, if you want to hear some EDM and it's kind of vibes, I think we could find that in the islands. Damn.

That's good. I won't be homesick, Tim. Yeah. I won't be wistful for my apartment, for your apartment. All right. Final thoughts,

please. Um, Tim, you go last dead fucking last. Michael. Ah, that's a pregnant pause. I don't think I'm going to order this again. Yeah. Michael? That's a pregnant pause.

I don't think I'm going to order this again. I don't think I'm going to get this again. I mean, if somebody hands it to me or if it's appointment only, but I just don't really love this. You know what I mean? Yeah. Sad. I think I only like it if it's in shot form because just as a a sipper drink i don't love it you got me thinking mike maybe as a shaken shot you know oh like look this this isn't like my favorite uh taste of all but nor is vodka nor is right straight tequila you know but you find ways in and i feel like if i

grew up with this like the great greeks yeah then this would this wouldn't um rub me quite so harsh i think it's just tough because it it really like i i it just reminds me of something else and i i you know sometimes if you like i feel like my mouth should be chomping down on a candy and it's drinking something in my mouth going yeah we don't do this mouth confusion where's the purple and white pellets? Yeah, they're coming. They're coming. Mike, the Greeks are operating at a high level where we're doing that on purpose.

It's meant to be mouth feel confusion. Well, that's the thing. I don't mean to, you know, Tim, to poo-poo your culture's drink, but it's just not, it's not, it's not readily, it's not easily accessible for me right now. Don't poo poo my native nectar. Yeah. Then I love it. So it's a no from Mike, an official, an official do not order again.

Yeah. I'm not going to say I wouldn't order it again, but it's a very cautious order again. Do you know what I mean? Well, the nice thing about it is if you're getting an Uzo, that's all it is. It's not like somebody can mess up the ingredients. Sure. So if you like Uzo and you order Uzo,

you get an Uzo. They can mess up the water. The ice. The water's hot. True. True. But as a celebratory thing, yeah, I think it's great. Is it better than champagne? I would have this over champagne. I don't know if the reason champagne isn't selling is because Uzo is so popular.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure if that's it, Tim. It's funny. I'm like thinking it's, it's the best of the worst, right? But like,

we don't really, none of us get amped up on the black licorice drinks. Right. I don't love absence. I don't love per no, I don't love the 200 other fuckers uh or sambuca or any of them the the the novelty of having this bottle around i'm gonna keep in my freezer and like as a celebratory shot it is funny because you you're right it's like vodka doesn't taste good and when you do shots you're doing shots and there's this

funny thing that people we've talked about this before but whatever like you say jaeger meister people like oh no jaeger and you're like okay then they do it yeah but but then like again you talk about fireball and be like no fireball and you're like no i know fireball is is 60 proof and there's no reason for joe joe siwa to be spitting it out and cringing. And Jaeger, I don't know the proof, but it's like normal, and it's like kind of delicious. And I think that, oh shit, do I like Jaeger more than Uzo? I don't know. We should do a Jaeger drink next.

I really don't have much experience with that stuff. We have the Jaeger bomb as part of the lineup right right right but uh something i i do like the novelty of having this in my freezer as as shots to do as a novelty i'll maybe order this again just as an aperitif at a greek restaurant when your only opposite your options are like a greek beer a wine or if you got did this with water um so i'm not going to stand here and pretend that i love this but it probably is an order again for me just because uh i'm gonna eat at greek restaurants sure sort of a way in rome when in greece sort of appointment only we are but not rome we hate the roman empire yeah no we don't like the roman you hate the roman empire let Yeah, no, we don't like the Romans. You hate the Roman Empire, right?

Fuck them. When that whole internet trend of Roman Empire thing was happening, it was a bad time in my life. Oh, yeah. How often do you guys talk about or think about the Roman Empire? Well, for me, it's Greek. The Greek Empire all day every day. The Greek Empire, right, for you.

But for me, yeah, it's the Roman Empire all the time. That sucks for me. and me that's our show follow us on social media at the sloppy boys where we release these recipes ahead of time and if you can't get enough boys go to the patreon.com slash the sloppy boys and unlock all those beautiful episodes that you fell in love with during the sloppy summer sales event. Folks, it was a great summer sales event and we're so happy to see everybody enjoying it. And,

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You know, like, you know, make an honest man out of us, you know? Oh, yeah. What's it when somebody is like when you propose to a girl or when you're living in sin? Make an honest band of us. Make an honest band out of us. I mean, come on, folks.

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push-ups, recorded it and talked about it. We're in the 200 episode. It's very fun. It's very fun and I feel like the barrier to entry is not, I think people know that the show is probably great. I think it's people that just, cause I'm like this, just don't subscribe to other patrons.

They're like, what is that? You guys say that word. They're like, I don't do Patreon. Do we do Patreon? You're like, I just don't do it.

So people do that. Like people say to my face, like, Oh, I want to watch Digman. And I'm like, well, it's on Paramount plus.

And they're like, I don't have that. And I'm like, well, it's four 99 a month. Like you don't like it to say like, I like, I was born this way without Paramount plus and like i don't have that and i'm like well it's 4.99 a month like you don't like to say like i like i was born this way without paramount plus but with patreon i get it's weird that you have to like type in a url but then you download the app you can download the app right

download the app for sure and then also unlike peacock this directly supports the artists you love you're not you're not getting, it's not paying some weird corporation. This is going to your boys. Right. This isn't going to Gene Domanian. This is going to Jeff Dutton. Jean Doman-Doi. This isn't going to David Zaslav.

Gene Domanian. The executive producer of Saturday Night Live for one season in 1981. One season? In 81? Replaced by Dick Ebersole. She filled the gap between Lorne Michaels and Dick Ebersole. Lorne Michaels circa.

Oh, that first name is so nasty. Dick. Gene. Dick. I mean, it's like penis and denim. Yeah, what is everyone who works over there named after something on your lower part of the body? Except for Lauren. Good night, folks.

Hey, hey, hey. Happy 200 to you guys. And here's to 200 more. And Opa and to the Slopheads, here to take you out off our second album, Dancing on the Wind. We just rocked the house at the Summer Jam Slam, but come see us on the West Coast Podcast Tour. Here is a song called Smashing the Plates, Opa to All. Bye, folks. Opa to All. I walked right into Williams-Sonoma

Everything was nice and fancy Myers I was having fun, I was having a moment And then I got a little too wild I started smashing the place Yeah, I was having a moment and then I got a little too wild. I started smashing the place What can I say I was having fun what can I say I'm Greek An ancient desire an inner instinct to yannis onto the Kumbha Streak. I was smashing the planks. Yeah, I was smashing the planks. Oh, I was smashing the planks. And I was smashing the planks.

I strolled over to Crate and Barrel and Ethan Allen and Sir LaTop. You know what I did, what I did right then? I ran back to Williams-Sonoma, started snatching the planes. Yeah, I was snatching the planes. Oh, I was snatching the planes. Yeah, I was snatching the planes. And it's

true. Yes, it's true. Yeah, it's true. Oh, it's true, yes it's true, yeah it's true, oh it's true. Figs and melon and cacciatore, they're gonna be laying all over the floor. Eat pickles and peppers and cornichons, there's no circle surface to be laying them on. No fine pine china, no ceramic receptacles for your limes, your pine nuts, your yams, your vegetables. No porcelain plates for your gherkins and dates. Somebody went and trashed all the platters, but it's not my fault. What were they thinking?

Sure, I guess I'd feel remorse, but you gotta understand the risk you're running. You can't let a freak in a preppy plate store And it's not just plates, it's metaphoric Greater and grander allegory The plates are fierce The food is love And me, I'm an angel from above Cheeses and scones may break your bones But they're falling all over all bills to gnomes

Sharp, sharp, sharp There's no shards of your partier But it's a part of me nonetheless Cause I was snatching the plates Yeah, I was was smashing the plates. Yeah, I was smashing the plates. Oh, I was smashing the plates. And I was smashing the plates.

Yeah, I was smashing the plates. Oh, I was smashing the plates. Yeah, I was smashing the plates. And I was smashing the plates. I was smashing the place.