The Sloppy Boys - 207. Jack and Coke with Paul Rust

Episode Date: October 4, 2024

The guys welcome their hilarious friend Paul for a deep dive into a classic highball. First joined in 1907, the combination of Jack Daniel's Old No. 7 Tennessee Whiskey and Coca-Cola has become one of the world's most ordered mixed drinks. In 2023, the companies released a ready-to-drink can version in stores that isn't as good.JACK AND COKE RECIPE:2oz/60ml JACK DANIEL'Stop up COCA-COLAFill a highball glass 3/4 full with cubed ice. Pour Jack Daniel's over ice. Top with Coca-Cola.Recipe via Jack Daniel'sSaturday Night hits theatres nationwide October 11th Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton along with Mike Hanford. Hi. And Tim Kalpakis. What is up? And joining us in this episode is our very special guest, hilarious man, our good friend, and he's also playing Paul Schaefer

in the new film Saturday Night. Please welcome Paul Rust. And that's Paul's normal voice. OK, so Paul wanted us to let him know if anything was going wrong on his side with his microphone, but I think everything's working fine over there. I think he's underwater. Yeah, minor problem, Paul's underwater. But I have one of those old scuba tanks suits,

like with the big space helmet and a big tube. To be honest, with people getting rid of the smartphones, going back to flip phones, I wouldn't be surprised if we're not far off from that type of stuff, Paul. You wouldn't be surprised? I would not be surprised, but it does take quite a bit to surprise me these days. I like when you see a guy who's got the,

sometimes you see it at maybe, I don't know, the VMAs or something. Somebody would have the astronaut helmet, like the dome on their head, but they've got the water in the helmet. Yeah. Yeah, that's what's cool. That sort of costume where they're underwater

with the goggles and the snorkel, but they're walking around on land. Yeah, that's funny. We all love it. We're all laughing at them. You look great. You look crazy, but you look great. I think the MTV Awards should do a whole underwater episode,

and the spaceman guy is somebody in an old-timey scuba suit. Yes! I'm surprised they didn't do it this year. An underwater episode of an award show, an episode. They do all those episodes of that award show. Why not do an underwater one? Do an underwater one, for once. They could have done more of a SpongeBob thing, it was his 25th anniversary of SpongeBob this summer,

so they maybe could have done a whole SpongeBob, underwater, then at the end they can ring him out, finally somebody can ring out SpongeBob. Well I think at the end of most award shows, you could ring out the perspiration of the nominees. Yeah, they never show that. Is this a thing that pisses us off about award shows is the nominees are so nervous?

That would be great if the tradition of award shows was as the credits were rolling, we saw all the celebrities Squeezing out And all the winners have to drink it If you go back and watch like the first award shows were people like visibly nervous like they hadn't quite gotten it down That you have to look cool. I can't see Charlie Chaplin sweating bullets

that you have to look cool. Like, I don't want to see Charlie Chaplin sweating bullets or whoever it was. Well, it's weird, because he probably didn't have cameras in their face. I mean, he definitely didn't have cameras in their faces, but then it was like the idea of like losing an award and leaving a loser disappointed. That was probably kind of new.

Yeah, and if Chaplin's like any comedian who gets hired for best actor, he'd be a little fussy butt about it. Bill Murray, Eddie Murphy, the only two actors to really show their disappointment. And it's because, hey, guys, you know, as comics, we have to have stuff on the surface. We can't, our emotions are always just below the surface.

It's right there. It's right there. It's right there. I don't know that I've seen, is it Bill Murray for Lost in Translation? Like he looks pissed? Yeah. I think he left too, right? Didn't he leave the show or?

Yeah, Eddie Murphy left after he didn't get it. And then, yeah, yeah, yeah, Bill Murray frowns. But I guess also you could chalk it up to like, maybe they're just being their authentic selves, you know? Yeah. I mean, it's funny to have not fought through that moment. Speaking of authentic selves, I'll never say anything earnest again here.

You can. Please do, I'm trying to look up an Eddie Murphy movie. What was it? Was there a movie where- Google an Eddie Murphy movie? Was there a movie where there was a tree in his life? I wanted to see the Nutty Professor, but I couldn't, I have a peanut allergy. Yes?

All right. Yes! You say it about the tree? Oh, Paul, no, no, I'm so happy you interrupted what I was asking to say that. What was it? What was it? There's an Eddie Murphy movie where there was like a tree

and when each leaf, no, he has like, he has like a thousand words he can only say or something. That's what it is. A thousand words I wanna say. But there's a tree involved, right? Yeah, each leaf is a word The title should have been each leaf is a word All we got to go see each leaf is a word we wouldn't even need a trailer we know what that's about

Each leaf is word Well, I'll shut my yap right here for a moment. You guys, you know, you got to do business. No, no, no. Dare fall. Wait, wait, keep your yap open because while we're talking about word shows, I want to just say an interesting piece of history for comedy fans. I'm a television writer extraordinaire. I've been nominated two time WJ.

Did you know the first little bit of skit I ever got televised on TV was starring Paul and he was playing a award winner at an award show. It was a little bit in the, at the MTV awards. Timmy, that's right. I played a guy. Um, I won like best sound editor. Right, it was a, they used to do this award shows, be like earlier tonight, the technical awards went to so-and-so, they don't really talk about that on the main show anymore.

But then, yeah, you would won like some below the line award, but then you stood up and you were like, yeah, suck at Sandberg, and you were like a big showboater guy about it. Yeah, that the guy who nobody would normally care about thinks he's hot shit. A hot shot. Yeah.

You said hot shot. I said hot shit. That's the unrated version of the movie Hot Shots. Hot shot, part duke. Hot shit, part duke is what I meant to say. Hot shit, part duke. No, I remember, and you told what I meant to say. Hot shit, Park Duke. No, I remember, and you told me to hump the popcorn, like I was holding the popcorn and I was like humping it,

like I own this award or whatever. And then, do you remember at the end of the night at the award show, Jim Carrey was on stage and he humped the popcorn. And everybody came up and was like, did you see Jim Carrey also humped a popcorn? You're Jim Carrey's inspiration. From the beginning.

In living color, he would call me up, I was 10 years old. He'd be like, I'm trying to nail this female body builder character. I'm stuck with this fire marshal. I can't crack it. I can't crack it. We need a name, Paul. Do you know anyone's name?

Do you know anyone's name? What about fire marshal Paul? Oh, I don't know. Like, no, Jim, then you'll know you're getting your ideas from a 10 year old Bill. We knew it was a 10 year old because the first day was fire Marshall crayon. Do we get into some booze news? Yeah. Hit it. He's not like us.

He's not like us. He's not like us. He's not like us. He's not like us. He's not like us. I got my own verse right here. He's not like us. He's not like us.

Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake.

Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're all so fake. Drake, you're a snake and you're also fake Drake you're a snake and you're also fake Drake you're a snake and you're also fake Drake you're a snake and you're also fake Drake you're a snake and you're also fake Drake you're a snake and you're also fake Drake you're a snake and you're also fake Whoever should say oh so I'm going to the doctor tomorrow too. He's not like us.

Drake, you're a snake and you're oh so fake. Distract was sent to us by DJ Dank Callie endo. And if you have a booze news theme, email it to thesloppyboyspodcast.gmail.com. Mike, this episode recording is going to drop on October 4th, which means that the next tomorrow you're doing a standup show in Toronto. So if Drake does show up to the show, are you prepared to have a rap battle? I'm going to have to, yeah, I want to relisten to that so I can rap against him if he wants to come up on stage.

But more importantly, if you're in Toronto tomorrow night, come to Comedy Bar on Bloor. I'm doing my hour long set at seven and nine o'clock. Sarah Hennessey's opening. It's gonna be a lot of fun. Tickets are going. Get them now, they're probably gone already. Imagine if you live in Toronto and you're a comedy fan,

how sick you are of people being like, coming to a show and opening, is Drake here? Oh, is Drake here? Oh, is Drake here? Like, or in any town, we always just, any place we go, we say, like, a show in Seattle, we're like, Kurt, go, babe. It's like, you shouldn't say that to the people in the town,

like say that about the town to other people. They don't, they don't want to hear that every night they ever go out to see an LA comedian. This is what you guys are like, ooh, Kurt, Kurt. You act like that. It's like in Los Angeles, people always come in and they're like, oh, Clark Gable. And we're like, yes, we do love him. Yeah, we get him.

There he goes. Also, guys, before you get to the Booth news, I also didn't do my due diligence and say as a guest, I wasn't a polite guest, thank you so much for having me on your great podcast. Oh, Paul, you're very welcome. He practices gratitude. That's very kind.

And also thank you for coming on the podcast. And did you mention the movie, Jeff, you did? Oh yeah, October 11th, Saturday night hits theaters, right? That's right. Booze. Hey, wait a minute. There's some other things going on October 11th as well. The sloppy boys watch party.

We're going to be doing the sloppy boys. Bad news for your major motion picture. Sorry, bud. Apologize to Jason Reitman for us, would you? You guys are going to do it live from a theater while the movies play. I'm so pumped. I had seen you had shown us a picture of you as Paul Shaver. But when I saw the trailer, the clip of you, I can't wait. That's nice. Yeah, I'm looking forward to you guys, to you guys.

See you. It was cool, man. Also, we've said on the pod before it's the only trailer I've seen in recent memory that doesn't do like a slowed down pop song in the trailer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I can't. Jeff, was this on the pot or was this we were talking about if they did a slowed down version of King Tut? Yeah, it was on the pot.

It was like, King Tut. It's 1130. We don't even have a... King Tut. He's dressed as a samurai, what is this? King Tut. And credit goes to, of course, friend of the pod, best buddy of the pod, Neil Campbell, with Digman and Tim also involved, his creative talents as well. It was the first time I saw, heard a spoof of the slowed down... All-star.

Yeah, they did an earnest slowed down version of All-Star. Somebody once told me, it's like, rip diggmy, but the world is gonna roll, rip diggmy, but like cutting back and forth. Wait, was that a trailer? I missed that. Yeah, it was like the season one teaser for Digman. Yeah, Digman, the show that's made me laugh,

the hardest and most in the last couple years, and the compliment that whenever I talk to somebody about it, I always go, each joke is different, you know? Some shows will be like, that's like the highest compliment. Like some shows, like it'll be like half of them are puns. But it is like, I remember a Simpsons writer saying about The Graduate that it has all kinds of, The Graduate's great because it has every variety of jokes.

I feel the same way about Digman. And that the second thing I praise is the stories are real deal adventure stories. Yeah. Like little mysteries and adventures and stuff. Yeah. If any Indiana Jones movie took one of the plot lines from the episode and had it as the thing without jokes,

it would be an amazing Indiana Jones movie. So people should check it out. They should make them into Indiana Jones movies. Paul, and you can thank Tim Kupak is for that. For the story, for the plot of the story. I'm a creature of story. I swear I'm not like peeking down at a Robert McKee book every day. Thank you for the compliments.

And I'll tell you a funny thing about I know this, that thing, too. When yeah, when you hear hear the same recipes used for jokes a lot, and Neil is really diligent about us doing a lot of alts and alts and alts to make a joke different, but a very funny, we had a, speaking of jokes being the same, we were midway through writing a season when the strike happened and then we got back and it was picking up where we left off and Neil gave us a little like first day back type of pep talk. And he was saying like, hey, let's remember like all these characters.

Let's remember their original like character games and how they're all different. Cause you know, it's really fun when the characters like speak differently and don't just share the tone of like, like a Digman joke. And I just don't, like, I don't want it to feel and this everyone knew this was directed at me but he was being nice. It's like not like, I don't want it to feel, and everyone knew this was directed at me, but he was being nice.

He's like, not, like, I don't want every character to always be like turning to someone else and saying, you big bitch. And I was like, I know I've written that, yeah, probably I've put that in the novel. At some point. Not everyone can be a big bitch. You know, like, different people say things

in different ways. Hey, it worked for perfect strangers. They were big bitches, my guy. That's funny, Paul, when you said, like, there are different jokes, and we all, like, laughed. It's just so funny to hear, like, a positive criticism be like, the jokes are good. It's like, ah, that's unique for a comedy

to have good jokes. Yeah, no shit. You got a heart. It's like, ah, that's unique for a comedy to have good jokes. Yeah, no shit. You got a heart. It's a comedy that makes you laugh. No. Okay, so here for boozers today, I said to myself, Tim, we got a, what's special about this episode, we've got an Iowa boy, Lamar's Iowa's finest, Paul Rust.

Woo-hoo! Here. And I said, go Hawkeyes. No, it's Hawktua. Buck guys. These days it's go Hawktua girl. What's the Iowa thing? Hawkeyes. Hawkeyes. Hell yeah.

Herky, Herky the Hawkeye. Well, I was curious about what's going on in Iowa drink culture. I was curious if any of this checks out to you as like when you go back home, you see any of this or maybe you've grew up with it or maybe you didn't. Maybe we could debunk a bunch of myths. I did a news search and I did see, in this year there's been a lot of like, hey, here's what's happening in the Iowa cocktail scene.

And here, the first thing that I found was, according to a blog called Stacker, the big Iowa drink is something called a frozen blue water margarita. Whoa. Paul, we're all the dads in your neighborhood. Kick him back. Frozen, frozen blue water margarita. This was recently like in an article, a roundup of like drinks from different states. It was like, well, Iowa has the frozen blue water margarita.

Have you heard of it? No, I hadn't heard it. I believe you. It's funny though, because for a landlocked state, that sounds straight up tropical. Well, the little blurb I read said it's inspired. Wishful drinking, I think we call it. No, this one's inspired by West Okebogee Lake. And it's blue in tribute to West Okoboji Lake. Yes, Okoboji is the vacation destination in Iowa.

And people say this stuff and it's probably bullshit, but it's something crazy. It's around 4th of July, it's the number one most populated area in the Midwest per capita of the town. It's like crazy, all these boats come. And we went there once when I was a kid. We were more, because I grew up in Northwest Iowa. Is it the type of thing where the boats come

and they sort of hook together, like those? Dude, I'm seeing crazy pictures. Floating, oh. Yeah. I mean, they like rope together and now become like a. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, they like they like rope together. And now we can. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. Yeah. And then they have like a fuck fest.

Oh, whoa. I'm looking at the picture, too. Holy shit. Let me see this. This is crazy. This is. It's in the chat. You guys can see it. Oh, yeah, exactly. Oh, that's a float. Look, there's chat. You guys can see it. Oh yeah, exactly. That's a flow Tilla. Look there.

There's a band playing that's great. It's a shit. Yeah. We got to go to Oakey Pooch. Growing up, I grew up in Northwest Iowa. And so we'd go to South Dakota to Yankton where diehard director John McTiernan was sent to the penitentiary there for the... Do you remember those weird Anthony Pelicano wiretapping scandal where comedy super manager Brad Grey hired Anthony Pelicano to like tap

people's phones like Gary Shanley's phone and stuff, to get the inside dirt. What? To what end? I think when Brad Grey and Gary Shanley were in a lawsuit, they were suing each other, he hired Anthony Pelicano to tap Gary Shanley's phone. And John McTiernan used Anthony Pelicanos,

and I'm not even gonna say allegedly, because he was tried and found guilty for using this. And then, yeah, I guess there's some, I don't know what kind of level of security prison, but somewhere in Yankton, South Dakota. And so, it always delighted me. I was like, that's how hard up for like show business in the Midwest.

I was like, whoa, to think an hour away John McTiernan's in prison. I'm proud. That's huge for you, my God. Yeah, I went to Okoboji once. And the coolest thing I remember was they have a riverside Kentucky fried chicken that you can park your boat at a dock and go up the steps to a campsite.

Oh, I love that shit. Damn. I love any time I see a movie or something where like, like a James Bond movie where a boat pulls up and you can walk right in the casino, like from the dock, to like a nice hotel from the dock. That's cool. That is very cool. I mean my

I went to Iowa City the University of Iowa In Iowa City for college and that you know, it's a college town. It's a big tent So it's got a lot of bars and I would go to It also has the writers workshop at the University of Iowa. Right. And the cool writers bar and like where the film student kids would go was this place called the Deadwood and the one story I have about the Deadwood

was I watched After Hours in a film class. Have you guys seen it? The Griffin Dunn, the Martin Scorsese movie? Oh yeah, I have. I started that the other day and I was a little not feeling like watching movies but I haven't got back to it but I'm excited to see it. The other day? That's its own thing. That's like a funny sort of like exercise in like comic frustration. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like happens in a night or something? Yeah. I like those types of movies. Yeah, it's funny.

But there's a part where, part of the frustration, he's, you know, the guy's trying to get laid, and then he goes into a bathroom, and the doodle next to the urinal is a guy with his penis sticking out and a shark biting down on his penis. And he just looks at it, and he's kind of like, oh, what's that mean, you know?

And then I watched the movie, then I went with a group after the movie to the Deadwood, I go into the bathroom, I see graffiti of a guy's dick getting bit by a shark. Wow. Yeah, it made me happy. Damn. Wait, also, Tim, you wrote a sketch about a guy who, well, many bad things happened to

this man's dick. One of the things was that his dick got bit by a shark. Horty Beats, right? Well, the title is guy who keeps hurting his dick. That was in the show. I would get in a car accident because I'm drag racing and then people would pull me out of the car and be like my dick.

And then I would have like a cast on my dick. Like all these big things kept happening to me but over and over again. Like but then my dick was in a little wheelchair by the end. You know how they say sometimes you don't know when you're in the moment that it's a, you're living a great time and until later. But a time that I do when

I was experiencing it thinking I am this great I am in a great time was when we on Friday nights would go to public house and watch IFC and we'd watch the new bang bang episode and the new birthday boys episode. So fun. Yeah. Those was the best. Those were the best nights. I loved it. That was the most fun thing to do in like 10 weeks in a row to get everyone together

and watch shows, but we were also recently laughing about how Public House was nice enough to let us use that room, but then they didn't turn the music off. So we would have like the sound up on the TV, but then it would be like, hey, we're the party. Yeah, go then it would be like, hey, we're the party. Yeah, go over there. We're the party. Yeah. Do we have like, there's like a cloth

we could put over the kind of like there. Yeah, but the cloth did nothing. The cloth was too thin. Hey, guys, the cloth is too thin here. And every time we would ask, we'd be like, hey, can we watch our show? They'd be like, huh? Oh, what?

You want to watch the show? It's like, we do this every week. This is the second year we've done it. We've done it for 10 weeks in a row. Starting to scratch every time. Every Friday going show? It's like, we do this every week. This is the second year we've done it. It's like we're gonna scratch every time. Every Friday going down, I was like, I wonder if it's gonna happen this week. Yeah, it is.

Yeah. Ooh, that was fun though. That was the best. Yeah, that was a good time. Oh, Paul, you bring up your college years. University of Iowa. Yeah. Yes, you did.

Yeah. I thought in my head the the Paul lore was that you were not a drinking man in college. Is that true? That's true. I was not and so I would go to these bars and sit and watch people drink. Cool. Very cool. Were they your friends or did you know them? Or? Total strangers. Leering. But when did that begin, Paul? You know, it's funny because with our drink later, you know, I did an, oh boy, this is choir boy virgin territory, guys, sorry.

I didn't have my first drink I think until like I was 27 or 28 well later than I thought yeah when usually when rock stars are dying the new 27 club you're just starting your own chemical suicide yeah heavy drinking rocker died and then was like reincarnated inside 27 club. You're just starting your own chemical suicide. Yeah. Maybe some heavy drinking rocker died and then was like reincarnated inside you as a drinking habit. Like quantum leap. Yeah.

Brad Noel's body goes, his soul goes into my body. And like, it doesn't, it's just an additional soul now. Two souls. It's so messy additional soul now. Two souls. It's so messy. Two souls. Yeah, I remember it was at the birthday boy's house, the Fredonia house.

Wow. I didn't know that was the first night. I'm not saying that was the first time I drank. It was one of the first few times. Oh, damn. Okay. And I still didn't know my limits, and I drank too much,

and I was on the couch, kind of hunched over, like, mm, mm, feeling awful. And I remember hearing Mike Cassidy go in the distance, guys, you don't understand, it's like he's 16 and trying it for the first time. Oh, that's so sweet. He's having what we had a decade ago now. Yes, yes.

I do remember that night, Paul, we can take this out if you don't want this to, but you did a little technicolor yawning outside in the yard and throwing up. And I was standing by, I'm like, you all right? And I brought you a water or something. And you were like huffing and puffing and spitting, you know, and you're just like drinking.

And you just kept going, thanks buddy. Thanks buddy. Thanks buddy. Thanks buddy. Thanks buddy. Practicing gratitude. You can keep that in. You know, you know when you get like,

I don't know if you're drunk or something, you just kind of can't get out away from one thought or something. It's like, this is comfortable for me to say thanks buddy. And it's making me feel okay. I'm gonna do this. Yes, yes, but I was, yes, Tim was right. I was, even the practicing gratitude.

Even when he was so drunk, it still comes out. Yeah, I remember yelling to Cassie, I was like, yes, he may only be 16 years old in terms of drinking, but he's light years ahead of us in terms of how we treat each other. I like this timeline being complicated, like it's like a science fiction thing. but he's light years ahead of us in terms of how we treat each other. I like this timeline being complicated. Like it's like a science fiction thing. Like he's 16 years old in alcohol terms. It's like, what's this Benjamin Button?

It's like, so like as of now, you're up to the light. You're like, he's 30 and that is alcohol. Yeah. He's got Benjamin Button button just for his drinking. Wait, so then let's, Jeff, can we wrap up Boo's News, please? Yeah, Boo's News is wrapped. Meeland, give us a sound effect. And of course, my sidekick Hank.

And of course, my sidekick Hank. Hey now. Hank. That's a sentence. No. Perfect. Let's ride right in. The drink of the day is the Jack and Coke.

So Paul was like, I associate you, I've heard you, I've heard you order this drink back in the day. And I remember also thinking like, not even talking to you, like maybe at like Birds next to UCB or something or Ye Rustic. And I feel like, I heard you say Jack and Coke and I was like, that's a perfect Paul order because it's so iconic. Like I know your food taste. You like a Hershey bar and a red can of Coke. And just hearing Jack and Coke, I was like, that's kind of the perfect Paul drink. But then I do feel like then later, I was at a bar with you and you ordered a Makers and Coke and I was like, that's kind of the perfect, uh, Paul drink. But then I do feel like then later I was at a bar with you and you ordered a

makers and Coke and I was like, Ooh, la la Paul. Tim, that's all right. Everything you said lines up. It's on all tracks. That's all correct. So what is, was like a whiskey Coke, like what is it, where did that start for you and is that your drink or did you, like, was there like somebody, like what made you pick that? Yeah, well it's funny because as a late bloomer drinker,

I think I probably was very self-conscious about mispronouncing things and stuff. Like just being like, oh sure, a dope in front of everybody. And truly it was like, I've heard of a Jack and Coke. Also, I'm just a corporate shill, so if I could say two corporation names. Yeah. We're like Whiskey Cola and you're like, no.

Jack Daniels, limited, registered trademark, and Coca-Cola classic, TM. And I ain't talking Transcendental Meditation, boy. Yeah, you're in California now, so they're trying to spin it that way. And then, yeah, so I did that for a while, and I do think when I was 16 that night at your party, I had been drinking Jack and Cokes.

And oh, but obviously, not obviously, but the main reason was because, guys, in my heart and soul, I love Coca-Cola so much. And you know what's really great when you love Coca-Cola is people don't frequently drink Coca-Cola, you know, because it's bad for you or, you know, it's, it's, and when somebody, if I'm drinking a Coke and they go, oh, I'll get a Coke too, or they ask to take a sip

and they take a sip. I, that was my, what the fuck? I'm murdering somebody below this desk. Oh, oh, oh, oh, okay. The feeling somebody probably gets who's like Christian and they get somebody to like find Jesus. Like when somebody drinks a Coke and they go,

oh my gosh, I forgot how good Coke, this is so delicious. I'm like, yes, yes, I know, I know, I know. It makes me so happy. But I do love it because I've loved it ever since I was a little kid. It is classic. It is. Wasn't that kind of the give the world a Coke thing?

Like the whole thing with Coke has kind of been like share it and it can make you all happy. Get everyone into it. I love all of the, yes. I love the ethos of Coca-Cola a whole bunch too because their ads, before this was a term, they don't punch down. Like Coke doesn't even worry about Pepsi.

They're not doing ads about like don't drink Pepsi. That's Pepsi's job to be like all nervous about Coca-Cola. Yeah, dude. But they're always like aspirational, but not in a corny way. It'll be like, hey, Christmas time, Santa and polar bears. Isn't that kind of a sweet notion? And it's like, we have the Santa, fuck that other Santa.

Yes. He looks like how we want him to look. And the nation was like, yes, Coco Hall as the official Santa. This Santa will kill Krampus, foot's in brawl. And then the Olympics, it's like all these things that are just like. Yeah.

The big dogs. Yeah. Yeah, like American Idol. Kodak used to be the same thing, like Coke and Kodak would always be Olympic-y type things. I'd be like, yeah, Kodak was around for a while. And I always. For me, the sense memory I have,

even beyond the taste of Coke was like going to my grandmother's, getting a glass of ice from the ice-erator in the fridge, and pouring a Coke on there. And when the Coke is sitting at the top of an icy glass, it tickles your nose before you take that sip. And there was even a movie theater pre-roll thing, where you drive past a Coke, and the top is doing the fireworks.

I love that. And I was like, oh, they nailed it. Graham, imagine that being on your nose. Yes, boy. Yes, boy. Hand me the popcorn, boy. I'm sure Coca-Cola probably has some like wretched history where it was like used to colonize like.

As a weapon. probably has some like wretched history where it was like used to colonize like. It's like. As a weapon. Yeah, they dropped it with like Bibles on places. It's like. But yeah, yeah, I like lately what you were saying to filling it up with ice. Because now Coca-Cola is just a little too sugary and sweet for me.

My favorite thing now is I'll get a cup and I'll fill it like a true American asshole. Just fill up the cup to the brim with ice and then pour a little bit of Coke until it fizzes up to the top and then the ice starts melting down and it makes the little tinkle sound. It's all good stuff.

But then yeah, after a while the taste, maybe because of some aversion to the Technicolor yawning, I moved away from Jack and Coke, then, yes, did Makers and Coke, and then dropped the Coca-Cola, was just drinking Makers on the Rocks. And then pre-COVID, dropped Makers and whiskey altogether. And guys, this whiskey that we'll be drinking later will be the first time I've had a whiskey in five years. Whoa! Yeah. What happened? You just, you didn't like the taste anymore? a whiskey in five years. Whoa! Whoa!

Yeah. What happened? You just, you didn't like the taste anymore? You stopped drinking altogether or what? I still drink, but my drink of choice now is vodka, but I love Jack and Coke's the idea to say the words are fun. So, you guys would have been interesting. When you wanted to do it for the episode, I was like, yes, I'm down for it. Let's do it. words are fun. So when you guys wanted to do it for the episode,

I was like, yes, I'm down for it. Let's do it. That's fun. Hell yeah. It's a homecoming. Dude, that's great. And I'm so relieved that you weren't like, I haven't had a drop of alcohol in five years.

No, thanks for bringing it back. Guys, what's funny, I say pre-COVID because when COVID started, we were all in lockdown. I drink when I go out to bars with friends and stuff. Right. I don't want you guys thinking I'm not cool. You know I love the gonge. But I just, I wasn't drinking during COVID. And so this would have been, I guess, four years ago. And then when the restrictions lifted a little bit and you could like order drinks from places,

I went to a friend's house and we ordered drinks in and my body was all off and I drank way too much. I think Makers was probably in it. And I had such a terrible hangover the next day. I swore I had contracted COVID. I had time out with all those drinks I drank. It's so weird. But yeah, now I like, yeah, for whatever reason,

I like a vodka drink of some kind, but the idea of getting... Like a vodka soda or just whatever you're ordering? Yeah, I'll usually do Tito's on the rocks, but I'll do Tito's and tonic. I like that as well. Oh, that's nice. Nice. Tonic is good with some lime.

Yes, yes. I usually take a lime if it's offered and... You're praying they offer it? But I noticed, yeah, the whatever hangover part two and part three, I just wanted to say the whole trilogy. With a hangover, they're easier with, I'm sure this is true of every, Tim, I think you explained it to me once about, you were like- Or clear liquids?

Yeah, you're like, oh yeah, there's bits of like, you can almost think, because it's in a barrel, there's like bits of wood you're drinking when you're drinking whiskey in. And so it's mainly just hangover avoidance that I drink. Smudge. Along with like in the taste. Now, speaking of hangover avoidance that I drink. Swert. But along with like in the taste. Now, speaking of hangover avoidance,

I wish that when Hangover 3 came out. Thank you. Yeah, that was hard for you to watch. That was a sad time in your life when you watched that funny movie. I remember being in the theater with you. We weren't together, but I was in the back and I just heard the whole time from you. Why go back to the US?

You think they should live in Bangkok for the rest of their lives? Wait, Tim, what was it the hangover? We went to go see a movie, a comedy movie, and we ran into, this is before we really knew Paul. That was the 10. Before we really knew these guys, and we ran into Mike Cassidy in the elevator. Yes. Oh, the movie, the 10.

The 10, yeah. It was the Showalter, Mike, or no, yeah, that was Showalter and David, it was like sketches, right? Yeah. Yeah. And I remember we got into an elevator, and Mike Cassidy got in and like David. It was like sketches, right? Yeah. Yeah. And I remember we got into an elevator, and Mike Cassidy got in, and one of you was just like, hey, man.

And I've had this before. Not remembering that we don't know him at that point. Paul, I had not met you guys yet, but I'd seen you in UCB shows. And I've had this before. I forget that I don't know someone. So we were in an elevator. And instead of saying, like, hi, I'm Tim, I'm in UCB classes, I was just like, hey dude.

And he was like, hi. And I just like afterwards I was like, oh, we haven't met. We haven't met. I did that. I saw. I didn't say that, did I? No, no, this was my cast.

I don't think you were there, Paul. I think it was just the cast. I was reading a book about John Landis at one point when I was a production assistant running errands for James L. Brooks. And then, while during the week I was reading this John Landis book, I went to the Beverly Hills Post Office

to mail something for James L. Brooks. And I was walking up the stairs, and John Landis was walking down the stairs. And I was like, hey. And he was like, hey. And I was like, I don't know that guy. I'm reading a book about that guy. Parasocial too.

It's a parasocial relationship. I didn't need a podcast just from reading a book. I got out of the social. Okay, so back on the, I have a quick history here with the Jack and Coke, which is- Yes, please. Well, everyone knows that Jack Daniel invented Jack Daniels in 1866, right? And everybody knows that Dr. John Pemberton at Jacobs Pharmacy in Atlanta invented Coke

in 1886. Oh, I didn't know that. But it wasn't until 1907 that there was this guy, a nerd named Dr. Lyman Kebler, who was the head of the drug laboratory at the United States Bureau of Chemistry. In 1907, specifically made a trip down south, he was sent to gather data on the popularity of Coca-Cola in the southern states. And so he studied people, kids like Coca-Cola. And I think this is when it maybe had cocaine in it, I don't know if that's an urban legend or whatever,

but in his findings, these people drink Coke and those people, he said that there was a military base where the soldiers were going to a soda fountain and getting Coca-Cola and they were mixing it with whiskey to make something called a Coca-Cola high ball. And he made a note that it made the soldiers wild and crazy. And then, you know who carried the torch of the drink flash forward to Motorhead Lemmy very famously,

Jack and Coke guy. Hung out at the Rainbow Bar and Grill in the Sunset Strip, always drinking Jack and Cokes. I first heard of it in high school when my friend Sal DeFalco had it. Mike and Jeff, do you ever order these? Has this ever been in the repertoire? I do, I've definitely had them and it's, it's always one where I'm, you know, if you're at an event or something,

it's like we have a few options, either whiskey Coke or, you know, beer. That's usually when I'll get them. I don't order them usually. Right. Normally if I was doing something like this, I'd do a whiskey ginger or a rum and Coke, but I've certainly, I've certainly had a Jack and Coke. I'm excited to have one tonight. And I'll say that I mentioned we're playing Fortnite, me and Mike and our buddy Joel Keeler.

And I said, hey, we might do Jack and Coke. And he said, oh, that's good. That's one I do. It's nice to know the slop heads are out there. They do this stuff. That's awesome. It tests well in Pennsylvania. And I'm not going to embarrass Joel here, but he was excited that we were doing that drink and you were going to be on. Aw, that's nice. The guest is testing well in Pennsylvania.

And Pennsylvania is going to decide the election, so this is part of our coverage. Yeah, it's funny. Joel, make sure you vote for president not soda. Don't pencil in coke. I guess, yeah, that Tennessee is Jack Daniels and Georgia is Coke. It is sort of a Southern bell drink.

Tim, a couple of things that you said, it's Jack Daniel who made it, huh? I never knew Jack Daniels was like a possessory or however you pronounce it. Apostrophe S. Yeah. Oh, wow. And then with the Coke inventor, I think it's really cool that he could have just sat on his millions from inventing Coke, but he went and pursued his dream of acting Mr. Johnny

Pemberton. All comedian Johnny Pemberton. That's so cool that he was still inspired to go try other things. People always remark how young he looks. And the fact that he's actually the inventor of Coca Cola. They don't realize just how old he actually is, my God. Johnny, you look so young. of Coca-Cola. I don't realize just how old he actually is, my god. Johnny, you look so young.

Oh, you don't know the half of it. You have no idea. You don't know the half of it. I invented Coke. And I don't think it's an urban legend. I think cocaine was in the original formula for Coke, and I know we're all the biggest, biggest fans of Late Night with Conan O'Brien, Conan in general, but they did this amazing sketch,

where they dug a hole in the stage and found a time capsule or something, and they're pulling stuff out. And the joke is like, this stuff has the ability to kind of remark upon contemporary things. They pull a radio out. And you know, if it's a radio from the past, it's played a radio broadcast from the past.

Of course, the technology checks out, yeah. And I remember for the, it's still with me. It's the funniest joke. It was like, babe, Ruth has just hit a home run. This game is brought to you by Coca-Cola. Back when it had cocaine in it. Back when? Back when.

Back when. They need to say it. That's so funny. That's what I would have said. Oh, fuck. You know what? Tim, why don't you do the recipe and then I'm going to tell you what I have in store for us over here.

It's just for me. It's not a big deal. Okay. Official recipe straight from JackDaniels.com. You're going to have two ounces of Jack Daniels old number seven, which is the classic. The black and white. And Coke. So the instructions are three quarters fill a high ball glass with cubed ice.

You know, when I order one, I'm actually hoping for a shorter stouter glass. Yeah, rocks glass. I'm going to do rocks glass myself. I've got a tall skinny that I'm going to use just because I'm trying to adhere to what JackDaniels.com wants me to do. Fill up your highball glass three quarters of the way of the cubed ice, pour in the two ounces of Jack over the ice, top with Coke, and then a little blurb about this drink. When smooth charcoal mellow Tennessee whiskey first met the sweet fiz of Coke

America's classic cocktail was born. The natural vanilla of whiskey mixes so perfectly with a heavy caramel of the Coke. It's almost like the two were made for each other. It makes sailors go wild and crazy. Southern sailors go nuts. Who gave these sailors Coca-Cola and whiskey? It probably was a for-loco of its time though, I guess, right, that it was like, it's sweet so people drink it fast,

but then it's whiskey so it messes you up too. Plus like the Coca-Cola would get you going, I guess. And then just being like a laboratory dork seeing drunk soldiers for the first time. He's probably, oh my God, they're crazy. Yeah. What is he? Me in college? He walks by them and they're just like playing horseshoes. He's like, hey, soldiers are crazy here.

It's out of control down here. Why aren't they sitting at desks? Then they yell, get them. control down here. Why aren't they sitting at desks? Then they yell, get them. Before we get these drinks, so I got myself a Coke and a Pepsi because I want to do a little Coke whiskey Coke whiskey Pepsi taste test.

But the reason I got it is because, Paul, this was a joke that you and Neil and Cassidy used to do. It's the funniest thing. And it kind of goes along with that, the story you were just telling about how like the times shifted, like the tenses shift. Anyway, it was a joke you guys had. We were in like a whatever. It was a Coke and Pepsi. I choose both. You got to choose, if I have to. With such, like, even more, like, even more fervent

that any ad campaign would ever, like, put out the idea that you could drink both. You can't. Like, no, no advertising agency would ever pitch that to a company, like, let's just let your customers consider the idea of buying both products. Yeah, yeah.

That's in there. That's what they want to do at first. We all know that. They want to do both. But for some reason, you can only choose one. Very similarly, you guys had a song about eating pizza that was like, first you put a pepperoni in your mouth. And then you add a piece of cheese, and you add a piece of bread, and then you have a wholeoni in your mouth and then you like added a piece

of cheese and you added pizza bread and then you have a whole pizza in your mouth or something like that. That was an episode. That was an episode. That was a show. Speaking of science, I think it was just called like scientists or something and everyone had all the sketches were like science involved. And I remember Cassidy, he was character was exiting.

So he goes to the door and he couldn't get it open at first. And he goes, science and walks out. Yeah, that was like a Besser directed sketch show, right? Yeah, like back when the theater just kind of like was grabbing people and just like stuff up on its feet. It was, yeah. Yeah. The pizza song, me and Mike and Neil

all came up with together and we're cracking each other up with that. But the Pepsi Coke thing, it was like my first two weeks after I moved to Los Angeles. And obviously Mike and Neil liked me as a friend and loved me, but I so just, you know. They're a little older, like a year older than you.

Yeah, yeah, and I met them in college and they invited me to, they were like, hey, come out to LA and join us and we'll do comedy together. And that first couple months, I just didn't want them to regret Mickey's invitation. So I was constantly that invitation. So I was like constantly making jokes. Being funny?

And like. Song and dance. And I remember we went to a grocery store and I said that and they laughed and I was like, okay, good, I made my quota for the night. I can power down for the rest of the night. Yes, yeah. Oh my God.

And they'll let me stay in California. These two guys. The two nicest guys. Just my luck they call up the governator. Paul, you have to leave California. You are not funny enough. Not funny enough. Let me tell you this joke, this Coke Pepsi thing.

Have you heard the song I got? You can stay. When we moved to LA, we were living in Governator times. That was like comedy gold. That's crazy. That's so weird. He was our governor. Our Governator. Our Governator. Who was the governor then? Who's the Go then later now. I think it was Gavin Newsome Okay, well you guys want to make these drinks we'll come back yes

Folks dig out your wallets here come the ads. We'll be right back with more sloppy boys I saw Transformers 1 last Friday and there's a funny thing about that movie where, have you noticed, like, I first noticed this when I was a kid watching the first Ninja Turtles movie that, oh, Jeff, I was talking about, I went and saw the new Transformers movie. Oh, Transformers 1. Yeah, Mary wanted to see it, so we went and saw it. How was it?

I like heard good things in the last like week. Oh yeah, yeah, it was a It was good. I mean for a Transformers Animated feature it hits on like it checks every box it's like action-packed and funny and stuff, but I I remember when first watching the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles how when Casey Jones had his mask on the actor like

because he can't use his face would kind of use his hands a little bit more. Oh yeah. It's so great about Transformers they're just so the whole time like buddy you have to understand. Arm acting. Yeah. Wait is that the new, the cartoon? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And even though it's a cartoon, which is already limited in its humanness, doubly, because it's a robot and animated, they overcommit, say, with the hand gestures.

Dude, I also remember that in Power Rangers, like the Power Rangers acting. Yeah. They would just be like like everything they say like They're like nod their head it's like Muppets, you know, like Muppets are kind of always nodding and always sort of like checking in with each other We're back by the way, we can be back right we're back It's you we can use that turtle Power Ranger shit. That's my favorite shit.

Yeah. That's good stuff. Paul, in the break. I saw a tip. Go ahead. I was just saying, in the break, I had the Coca-Cola moment you always talk about, Paul. This was like a glass bottle Mexican Coke.

Haven't had a full strength Coke in a long time. I took a sip, just stole a sip while I was making the drink and I was like, fuck, it's so good. I don't ever get the shit. It's so good. It's a good Coke. Oh. Oh.

No, that's a Mexican Coke. See, but I'm still a not a Mexican. I like the, from the can or the American bottle. Yeah, glass or bottles preferable to plastic. Hey, have you seen all these people doing the diet coke challenge online and being able to tell that's a bottle, that's a can, that's a fountain from McDonald's,

that's a fountain from Burger King, that's a fountain from Wendy's. That's cool. It's amazing. Awesome, I'd like to do, I think I could do that with Coca-Cola. Oh, we're gonna set it up. Ooh, we're gonna set it up.

I feel like the... I feel like the... I think I would know McDonald's because the straw is a slightly wider gauge. That's what I've learned about McDonald's. I was just doing the Coke Pepsi thing in the kitchen. You know, I poured them out, but I did a little quick, a Coke and a Pepsi just taste.

And I look, I can, on a hot day, I will... You choose both? I will choose both on a hot day. But on a hot day, I will. You choose both? I will choose both on a hot day. But on a hot day, I can crack into either one fine. But just back to back, it's like, this Pepsi tastes kind of diety in a weird way. Really? And I haven't had a Pepsi in a long time,

but yeah, it just felt strange right next to the other one. Well, that's music to my ears. As a Coke man, I love that dirty Pepsi talk. This fucking sucks. Let's see these drinks, folks. Oh, they all look beautiful. That's pretty much what they look like. There's nothing fancy here.

They all look like a glass of cola. I'll do it myself. All right, for sips. Can we? Yes. Yes. Sippy. Oh, yeah.

That's classic. That's classic stuff. Oh, the vanilla from the Jack Daniels and the heavy caramel. It's almost like they were made for each other. But I mean, it's kind of funny because it's just two ingredients. But you know but we're always talking on the show, but you're a balanced cocktail, even if it's like 10 ingredients, you're hoping that it's like-

Yeah, we're all seeking balance. We're all seeking balance, but you're hoping with a recipe that you're not just pulling out ingredients, that there's some alchemy and that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. It is funny with this that it's just two ingredients, but it does make a new thing that is like weirdly very vanilla, like an, it's like a vanilla milkshake somehow. Yeah, if the Coke is the thesis

and the Jack is the antithesis, the drink is the perfect synthesis. Wow! Yes! We have a lot of Latin listeners and they're gonna- Okay, someone has a paper due tomorrow morning. Paul, we need to get to our work quicker. Wouldn't that be funny if like, people are like,

oh, when Paul takes a sip of alcohol, he becomes pretentious. Interesting, interesting. Sip of Jack and Coke makes him super pretentious. Oh, Professor walked through the door. I just took a sip of the, yeah, Jack and Coke is better than Jack and Pepsi. It's just so strange that right next to each other they really taste like worlds apart.

Yeah, there was a, I don't know if this is just lore, but they said with the taste test back in the day of like, what do you like the blind taste test? Do you like Pepsi or Coke more? Pepsi would rank higher, but it's because it works better as a sip. And Coca-Cola is something that's better as a whole glass or can.

Dude, I saw a video online where a guy was saying this to an even greater degree. This dude, he looked like an old, he was doing like a TED talk or something. He was old, important looking, confident, and he was saying, he was like, Coca-Cola, see like there's no, a Coca-Cola, you drink one at six in the morning, you drink one at noon, you drink one at night, they all taste great. And I was like, yeah. And he was like, other tastes accumulate over time.

If you're drinking orange juice all day, by the end of the day, you'll be sick of it. That's not true with Coca-Cola. I was like, I don't know if I- All day you would not like it? The same way that it's just like, I don't know if I... All day you would not like it. The same way that it's just like, if you gave somebody all you can eat candy, at first they'd go crazy and then they'd start to like,

eat just a normal amount of candy, just so you get candied out. He said it doesn't happen with Coca-Cola. Now I heard that that's what corn syrup does. Sugar tells your brain like I've had enough thank you but corn syrup sugar that doesn't tell your brain that and that's why we pump corn syrup into everything. And that's the big difference between Mexican Coke and traditional Coke right? Yes, is Mexican Coke has

cane sugar yeah. I love all that and that's great. Yeah, the corn syrup stuff is interesting because being from Iowa, I'm driving through corn fields my whole life, you know? You ever see a crop circle? Ooh. Yeah, you ever see any crazy stuff out there? I saw a crop circle from underneath a UFO as it was lifting me up. Oh, that's something.

No, we want to hear about crop circles. That may have just been the depression of the stocks with the propulsion system. That may not have been a crop circle. He's getting abducted and was like, whoa. And then looked down and went, whoa, a crop circle. Wow. Look down there, at least.

Look down there. My interests are above and below. But I'm bored in the middle. I'm bored in this beam. I haven't been bored in the beam. I was so proud of this state because I was like, oh, we make corn and it's such a wholesome vegetable and people eat it off the cob. And then it wasn't until I moved out of Iowa that I realized it's mainly used for corn syrup and then it's used to make like

sort of the two biggest poxies on the world, which is plastics and foods that are bad for people. So. Just all the worst shit from your proud cornfields. Damn. I was always the, or always, also the ice cream state, right? My town is the ice cream capital of the world, LeMars. It invented, it was invented there?

No, it's just, it makes a Wells Blue bunny there. And so it produces the most ice cream anywhere in the world. But it's nice if you drive into my town, you smell like a lot of times like the smell of, you know how an ice cream cone has that kind of like sugary sweet smell? Like Jenny's ice cream by Tim? Yeah, yeah.

When I walk by Jenny's and smell that ice cream, it smells a lot like the factories in my town, which is like town sounds, it smells like a waffle cone. Jesus Christ, smell your town, man. That sounds like heaven. We gotta get to Lamar's, Iowa. We got to get to Lamar's, Iowa. When I was doing my dazzling research for Booze News today, talking about that blue margarita, I was reading about a funny thing about corn syrup where like the other drinks, people were saying in Iowa like a fuzzy navel is kind of popular or a walnut maple old fashioned

is kind of popular, but they said every article, like all the comments by far, everyone was like, oh, everyone just in Iowa drinks Bush Light. Bush Light is like the biggest thing by a mile. They don't make it there. They make it in Ohio, but I'm guessing at Deadwood on tap, they would have had Bush Light. Deadwood on tap, they would have had Bush Lite. There was a funny little thing, a faux pas, a couple years ago with a Super Bowl ad where Bush is made by Anheuser Bush, which is Budweiser. Budweiser put out an ad that was like a Super Bowl ad that mentioned Miller is made with

corn syrup, yuck. Then all the corn farmers in Iowa were offended. They were like, that's our proud syrup that we provided. And then Anheuser-Busch panicked and then they quickly put out an ad, not for BudWise. It was a Bud Light ad that dunked on Miller, but they quickly put out an ad for Bush Light, the cheaper of their beers, that said,

proudly made with American corn syrup. Like the hard work of the corn fields goes into bush life. Well, I have in my hometown, the summer between my sophomore and junior year of college, I would come back home between years in college and just, you know, stay with my parents. But I had a job at a liquor store. Oh, no shit. And I'm trying to think of what was the...

Wait, did you choose to work at a liquor store instead of working at your dad's store? Yeah, my dad did an... Hire you? Yeah. He's like, I got this reference from mom. Let's see here. I'll have to call her.

You, let's see, your past job was babysitting the dog. Yeah, my dad retired a few years ago, but he owned, yeah, this business, Rust's Western Shed and that sold Western apparel and he was also a boot and shoe repairman. And he hired, yeah, Cobbler. Cobbler, I guess, makes the shoes. That's true. He was in the Cobbl-ist arts at least. Yes.

He was into cobble-ism. He had a fellow who worked with him, who was like a guy who had retired, an older guy who in post-retirement was sort of helping my dad out in the store. And so he had help there. And if I had gone and worked there, I'd be Robin work from dick.

You don't want to do that. You don't want to starve dick. Did someone say, I am not a cookie. That's a Paul Rice famous improv line. That's one that, boy, if we had more time, that's a really funny one. I remembered another one. Recently Paul, I was thinking, didn't you have a line where you were like, remember me?

And then you popped up behind someone and said, remember me? And Neil talked about it for forever. What a fall. One of your greatest lines is, Clinky tells all. Oh my god, I remember that. We don't remember Clinky tells all. That was a Playhouse Masterpieces. I don't think I was there.

Oh shit. Clinky tells. Spills all. But again, folks, these are improv shows from years ago. Back to being there. And you set up the jokes would be impossible. Yeah, any improv scene that you try to,

like, after an improv practice group, and you go back to your roommate, and you're like, and then I set, well, the person set, okay, the initiation was, we're all doing Boston accents, that's important. As long as we're remembering the funny stuff that people said on stage, I will say that I've maybe only had three comedy,

what you would call revelations in my life I've maybe only had three like comedy, what you would call revelations in my life from beginning, you know? And the first time I saw the birthday boys do a sketch, it was a true revelation, guys. Paul! Paul! For the longest time I thought that

Comedy was supposed to provoke and outrage and when I saw you guys do your thing of just being silly and fun and And people have done silly and fun as well, but then they twist it to provoke an outrage. But it was the first time where you guys were just being goofy. Well now, was this, Paul, was this, I seem to remember the first thing you saw from us was briefcase switcheroo.

Was it that? Yes. Yeah, me and Mike. Yeah, that was a- That's so funny to hear because Paul, you loom in my brain as the silliest person I've ever met. But the silliness is the thing that is so attractive to me about your comedy and to think of you be like wow these guys are silly it's like what the fuck were these to? I'm more of a bad boy rebel, but these guys are silly.

Yeah, but that's funny to think, Paul, that you had an attitude, because when we would see you do stuff before we knew you, it was with, again, with Cassidy and Neil, and it was very fun and very... Loose-goofing. I thought it was all very light and silly.

I didn't, it's funny to think, if you were thinking you were like, oh, I'm being a little dangerous. I know you had some dangerous stuff that we will go into now. It's a. But I think you guys had a little more edge, like, cause at this, when you would have first seen as it was at your Friday night show,

not too shabby that you hosted with Neil, that was basically like a open mic night for sketches. Anyone could like sign up up and test a sketch. Before we had the nerve to do any sketch, we went and watched you guys host that show a million times. The top 100 funniest things I've ever seen were nights like that. I would say that these days, if you're a sloth listening, watch the Playhouse masterpieces. Every month you guys do Playhouse and sometimes you live stream it.

I would say that's the closest thing I ever get to seeing the vintage, those days, the sensibility prevails. But we were so intimidated by you guys, but you did, you were silly and funny, but you guys did fucked up shit. You would do a long improv scene at the end and fucked up shit happened that we were afraid to do for sure. Yeah, that's true. I will say, the edginess, Paul was like, whoa, this guy goes to the edges.

Fearless. Fearless. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but it was like... And don't get it twisted, Paul. The, the, uh, me saying you're silly is a high compliment. That's important to me. I don't, I didn't want that to sound like, uh, tossing up. And when I say you guys are goofy... That is offensive to me. You know, the briefcase sketch is, is very, uh, it's, it very, it's a smart sketch.

It's not to say it's dumb, you know, it was like, it's a very clever idea. It's just, yeah, and I think after I saw that, I started writing and performing just a little differently. It really got a lot differently after I saw that, yeah. Damn, Paul. What an honor because I don't think you realize how instrumental you were in us just then continuing.

So that's our first sketch. That's the first time I ever stood on a stage doing comedy. And we were nervous as fuck, and we did the sketch. And it went really well. And it's funny because it's a two-man sketch. So it's me and Mike on stage, but five other birthday boys in the waiting room watching stage mom style. After the show at like 1 a.m., we walked next door to Bird's, the chicken restaurant, and

we were like, kind of like rattled and we thought it went really kind of well, but we didn't know how to feel. And then you came over and you were like, hey guys, that was really funny. Would you guys want to do, you guys should come back and do the show again next week. And we're like, Paul watches the show. You told cool up about us. Yeah. And she booked us at L CID and we were like, Oh my God, Paul's talking about us.

Well, Neil and I, yeah, we were like the biggest and are the biggest fans of you guys. And but I was just paying it forward because Neil and I met through No Shame Theater in Iowa was this Friday night sketch show similar to Not Too Shabby. And Neil, I would go and I, with my freshman year, I'd been going for maybe like six weeks and watching Neil stuff and Neil, it was just brilliant. It was really, really funny stuff. And he's a little out there, it was just brilliant. It was really, really funny stuff. And, and- He is a little out there, you'd say though.

A little. He's twisted. Really, very just like exquisitely written. And I remember I performed something and then I was walking into a building while Neil was walking out the following Monday and Neil asked me, he said, hey, that was funny, you should come back next. It was the same thing I said to you guys.

No way. And it meant the world to me that Neil said that now, you know, with all the respect to you, present company, it does remind me, I do think like Neil is the funniest guy. He cracks me up the most. Absolutely. I remember I said once to my wife, Leslie, and Neil's partner, Fran, I said to them, when Neil wasn't around once, I was like, guys, you know, I think like, Neil's like the funniest guy. And both of them went, we know.

Oh really? You're like, he's gone, now's my chance to come clean to the others. How can I tell him? We know. We know. But Paul, that's so cool that you got that going in, How could I tell him? I don't know. We know. We know. Paul, that's so cool that you got that going in college.

We sort of had comedy offerings. Tim, you had a show on the college TV. I was the co-creator and head writer of 30 Minutes with Dave Ferguson. Yes, yes. And you might think the co-creator was Dave. It's not. It was like me and my friend Chris created a show

called 30 minutes with Dave Ferguson. It was like a kind of like a weekend out. Like Dave was on a seat, and there were sketches that you would go to. That was good. It was a daily show format, but we didn't read the news because I'm too stupid to read the news. So it was just like a silly sketch show,

but it had a news desk. Well, we were in college, and we didn't have the news because I'm too stupid to read the news. So it was just like a silly sketch show, but it had a news desk. When we were in college and we didn't have smartphones and stuff, I don't think I knew what the news was ever. Like I don't think I was ever going online to look at news or, I was like, it was just as school. It was like, I gotta wake up and go to class.

You moved to Los Angeles or you got your first flip iPhone and you were like, 9-11? I thought it was 10-30. Mike. I'm late. I'm early. We had improv and standup stuff at Ithaca,

but it would never occur to me to go watch students try standup or improv or something. I went to an improv meeting once and it was like short form and I just, I didn't know anything about comedy really, but I was just like, ah, I don't like the vibe. So I kind of just stayed in a shell until LA. If you're not excited about what the other people are doing, then you're like, you're all just going up there and you're spitting comedy and avoid and no scene grows. But I think that with us, like you and Neil then went on to be in a sketch group called A Kiss From Daddy and the birthday boys were paired up with you guys for a monthly show

for like four years at UCB. And it was so fun because like we loved watching your show and you guys loved watching our show and like that was, I remember thinking, like when it was time for me to write my sketches for the month, I was like, these, Neil is, Neil is writing sketches right now. I'm scared about how good the AKFD sketches are gonna be. So I'm losing sleep, like I better write something good.

And it made me write a lot more In order to get a good sketch write those ten bad sketches to be like this could go up against a Nick Weiger thing Oh, maybe But it was like really high level well That was the opposite me and Jeff would strut around Jeff and I would strut around the house But we're gonna crush him this way this month Keep typing Tim crush them this week, this month, man. Who the fuck goes guys? They don't got shit. They're sitting ducks. Keep typing, Tim.

Come on. Hey, we're gonna go play tennis, Tim. You keep typing. Keep typing. You do great work, my man. Write me something real funny this month. I remember, Tim and Mike, you guys seeing, I saw some UCB stuff before we did classes in Shabby,

but not like you two did. And I think maybe Mitch were the ones kind of haunting. A comedy death ray and stuff. Well, Tim and Mitch used to go to CBB every week. I would go frequently, but those two were there. Every Tuesday. Yeah. Shows people won't understand.

I remember Paul and Neil sticking out and then and then Tim, you or somebody being like, hey, like we should do the open mic thing on Friday. They joke around like how we joke around. We should just like write it down and try some sketches. But I remember they joke around how we joke around being the thing that demystifies the getting on stage. That's not right. I think I know also what I was saying too is that the first time I saw you, Paul, it

was in the context of a comedy death ray standup show, which went on to be Comedy Bang Bang. It was like you're watching all these cool Brooklyn standups and Sarah Silverman's there and Zach Galifianakis is there. I love all those people, but I'm not going to be like them at all. Then you guys did a sketch that was like, you were the back to the future show from Universal Studios. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You did a silly boy silly thing in that. And I remember going home and being like, these guys are like, and it just went like, it was aggressively stupid in a way that was very charming. Yeah.

Yeah. The, I was just talking to somebody about that Back to the Future thing because Don't Stop or We'll Die that I do with my second bro, Mike Cassidy. All our listeners know. They're well versed. They've seen us on tour together. I had introduced the opening band, and so we were discussing what I should say for the introduction. And I remember we did that back to the Future Sketch and somebody who was doing a show at the Highland Park Bowl

before it became like a- Fancy schmancy. Fancy. Yeah. It was like run down. And the host asked us to come and do that bit at the show and she said, how do you guys want to be introduced? And I said, well, sometimes we'll have the host say like, you know, I'm always keeping

my eyes out for a new comedic talent. And I went to Universal City Walk and I saw these people there. And as I'm saying, and I'm like, it's too involved. They don't wanna know this. That would be real quick, Paul. That would be something when I'd be at UCB shows

and the host would say that. I'd be like, here it comes. Cause I would see you guys do that bit a lot. I'm like, this is gonna be great. So yeah, so I'm like. And sometimes Van Helsing came out. I'm trying to like explain it to them. And then I was like, oh, this is getting too,

I was like, just say we're, you want to introduce a new act for everybody to see. I was like, but just whatever you do, don't say back to the future because it's a nice surprise When the music starts and we come out dressed as the back to the future characters and she was like, okay Got it. And then she went on stage and she was like this next act is I

don't uh All I can say is back to the future. All I can say is the one thing I've been asked to not say. It's so funny thinking back in those days where like, you'd have complicated, especially sketch people would have complicated shit going on. And it's like, if the tech person or whoever doesn't get something right, like all of a sudden you're like, you're the new member of the group just for this sketch, you have to hit these cues

and they're like, I don't wanna even be here. Especially with like this sketch stuff, like in a show that doesn't even have a lot of sketch, they're making an exception to have sketch in their stand up night night. And then you want to have like John Daly or Brett Gellman tee you up just so, and they don't, and you walk out there and have to flop around for eight minutes. I mean, the word, like trying to do it in the context of a stand-up show, we did, remember a few weeks, like a couple weeks in a row, we did at the Laugh Factory.

Yes. Tom Arnold booked us to be in a row, we did at the Laugh Factory. Tom Arnold booked us to be in a stand-up night he was hosting. So it was just stand-ups at the Laugh Factory. Six in the afternoon too. It was like a hot time. And it's like there's waitresses walking around, selling people their minimum drinks and it's just a comedy club. And then it's like, this next act, you know, like I get a long thing like that. And it was just like, why are we trying to force this? It's funny, cause like, usually at a comedy show,

the first couple acts you have to, they're like teaching the audience that like, this is comedy, we sit here and you laugh, they say stuff, you laugh at those places. And it's like, so, and then you had these things. And now we've got something a little different from what you're used to. There's gonna be more people and there's a fourth wall,

I guess, it's like, setting up a thing for people that understand. This is separate from comedy world memories and stuff. This is its own separate idea. But when you mentioned Tom Arnold, I was watching old, just like late night talk show clips, and Tom Arnold was on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, and he said,

Jay Leno was like, hey, so what's going on with you and Roseanne, or so I thought, and Tom Arnold went, well, here's the thing, Dave. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! He called Jay Leno Dave. That's so funny. Ah! Ah! Ah! He felt bad.

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Hey, we should make another round of these and we'll come back and wrap it up, but do you guys want to tweak him at all?

I was thinking like a garnish. Like, is there a recommended garnish or we just kind of go like I do like a maraschino cherry? That would give us something, I guess. Yeah, I don't have any citrus, but maybe I got some cherry juice. You know what I was going to say? This would be a great drink to you know, I'm always saying I hate the the Coca-Cola freestyle. This would be a good

drink for a freestyle. You hate the machine? Because it's unnecessary I think. But you put like a vanilla Coke or any type of Coke with a flavor in this, that would be good. That would be a lot. That's a good idea. Yeah, I don't like a little AMC gripe here.

I hate how they've taken the majesty of the theater concession stand completely, you know, the magic of it away. Now it's like a 7-Eleven where you walk through a line and you're picking up the snacks as you go and stuff. And then the biggest punch in the crotch is when then you get your soda and do it yourself. Yeah, you do it yourself. And then in what universe does anybody want to touch the thing that everybody's touched with their like sticky fingers.

And that section's always a fucking mess. I never thought about this. Oh, you're gonna give me a complex. This is never occurred to me. You've ruined it. No, but the freestyle machines and the butter and the napkins, there's shit everywhere. It's disgusting.

And then also the, you know, you run through the dial and it's like every flavor of Coca-Cola and- Coca-Cola Peach. And Sprite and Fanta. It's happened to me twice where they don't have just regular Coca-Cola. It's like run out and it'll be like, I'm like, so you can give me Peach Coca-Cola?

But you can't. Give me that. You can't give me peach Coca-Cola? Give me that. You can't give me red. That's gross. So Paul, am I to understand you're not A-list then? Why do they fill your drink at the A-list? No, no, no. But like, you know, all these AMC gripes, you're not buying into the A-list.

I am. That's what's sad. Paul. Sad. I'm a regal. I'm a regal member. A-List is a cult. Everybody I know on A-List is trying to get me to join in a creepy way.

I'm Stubbs, but I let my A-List, like my credit card number change because I got a new card and I didn't update it. Nice, hell yeah. And I got booted. And I tried to re-sign up for A-List and they were like, you can't, like, you're like, you have to wait six months and I'm being punished

because I didn't update my credit card. But I'm Stubbs. Is A-list the one where you can see like three movies a week? Yeah, right? The one that lets you get into the special concession line. Ooh. Stubbs better. You know, I like that. Well, like, you know, Mookie, Mitch, the special concession line. Ooh. Ooh. Stuff's better.

I like that. Well, like, you know, Mookie, Mitch, like they're all doing the AMC, they bought in. And I just like, I see plenty of movies, but like going to the theater multiple times a month, I don't know, Matt. I did this the other day, Jeff. I have the Regal, I paid 22 bucks a month or something.

Yeah, you did a whole pod segment on it, I remember. Oh, I love that, it's a pod. Anyway, I was the other night, I was walking by a Regal and I was like, you know what? I haven't seen Twisters yet. So I went in to see Twisters on the street, put it in. I watched for about 15 minutes and said, this is stupid and I left.

That's cool that you can treat it like a TV. You don't even care. Yeah. Pop in. I was walking by what I thought was a Regency theater. And I buy a ticket for Twisters. I go in there and the movie starts. A guy comes up to me, some freak in a trench coat,

and grabs me by my chest and starts squeezing me. A ticket for Titty Twisters. I was a ticket for Titty Twisters. I bought a ticket for Titty Twisters. A lot of people make that same mistake, don't feel bad, it was Titty Twisters. Because it's alphabetical on the marquee, so yeah, that one, right, the twisters. And you know, I was seeing a lot of reviews,

bad reviews for twisters, and these reviews, and so the tomato meter's just going down, down, down, and I read these reviews, and they're saying, like, Oh, my chest hurts. My nipples hurt. It's like my areolas are puffy. You've got the wrong tickets. My nipples are purple. If you read the original review for Twister by Roger Ebert,

most of the review is it's just all caps, my wife hates how my nipples are bright purple and bruised. Right. No, and it's one nipple. Yeah, my one nipple is bruised. And then. Made their one day be a sequel for some symmetry on my chest. Would that there was a sequel that my wife may see a symmetrical Ebert chest.

Yeah, I remember that article. Well, he didn't even write it. He proclaimed it from the top of the Empire State Building. He screamed it. Yeah. We have to go to break. Here's what I'm going to do. from the top of the Empire State Building. He screamed it, yeah. We have to go to break. Here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna use a different whiskey

and I'm gonna use, I happen to have some Pepsi Zero sugar. I'm gonna make an off-brand one, see if it's way worse. Damn. I'm still going on my Pepsi here, so I'm gonna stay with this. Now Paul, you're a makers guy. Are you pivoting to makers now or what? No, I'll stick with, much like Angelica Houston in the 80s,

I'll stick with Jack. Okay. All right, folks. It is a lot like that, yeah. Folks, we're gonna make these drinks, we'll be right back. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy,

which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. And we're back with round two of Jack and Coke. I just added a half shot of DeSaronno. Jeff, how is it? Taste it now.

How is it? I want more of that vanilla-y, caramelly, hazel-y shit. That's a good idea. I just kept going with my, I just added a little more to my Pepsi. It's great. It tastes even more like candy. I like that the last segment did prove if you get four guys together and they have a

drink and they've been friends for nearly 20 years, they're going to remember the old days. Yeah. Come on. Oh yeah. It was funny because in the first segment, we hadn't had any drinks and we were specifically like there were no old days. Yeah. We have no memories.

What's coming up over the horizon? The present is the present and we're looking to the future. Yeah, we were only predicting the future. Quite well, I think. There's a Norm MacDonald joke where he's talking about, like, he doesn't drink or something or he used to drink. He's like, hey, you know, I'd go out and drink. You know it's drinking.

Classic. You go out to a bar and sit around an oak table and drink beers silently with a bunch of friends. Like picturing more of a like a, I don't know, an Elks Club type thing, a big oak table. Oh yeah. Did I ever tell you guys I got to meet Norm MacDonald once? No. Yeah. And most of my existence, my waking life, is people saying something to me. Waking life so cartoon animated rotoscoped. Yes, yes.

It looks like Ethan Hawke. Is somebody will say a word, it makes me think of a Norm MacDonald joke, and then I have to resist just sharing the Norm MacDonald joke it reminds me of. I went to like a trivia night at a bar that he was at, and I got introduced to him, and he said, and this is my brother, and I met his brother,

and you know, I now am meeting Norm MacDonald's brother, so I was like, oh, I remember a joke about how you said you and your brother watched a Twilight Zone and your dad came through the living room and he said, he pointed at the screen and he said, let me guess, is this a goddamn ghost? Was that on the view when he said that on the view? Yes, yes.

And he said, oh yeah, I quit telling that joke because it never got a good laugh. I rarely say it anymore. And then he said, is your old man like that? And I went, no, good. Way to keep up the conversation. He is not. No, no, goodbye.

And then I went, but I knew people like that. And Norma, that'll just repeated. Yeah. You knew people like that. And Norm MacDonald just repeated, yeah, you knew people like that. Yeah, okay. I know he's like walking away. But I knew people. He's like, all right, my man. Snatched from the jaws of fate.

But yeah, he's the funniest. Yeah, it is fun if you're in a, you know, you go to a situation where you're like in a room together and there's no music or anything and you're just sitting there drinking something together. It's kind of fun. It reminds me of the, well, geez, Paul, I, look, this was not intentional, but it reminds me of the scene in Inglourious Basterds, which you were in, where we, like, they're down in that basement, they're just like kind of,

it's when Fassbender, Michael Fassbender shows up. But it was just like, we're sitting in a room drinking and talking and that's kind of it. Yeah, I saw somebody did a little funny meme last night. I don't know if you guys saw it. It might've gone quite viral. Oh my God. But it was-

That's Tim's area. Oh, it was a explain the joke on Reddit where somebody's like, I see this, what does this mean? And it was a joke that would maybe need to be explained for somebody, but it was clever. It was somebody in that scene holding up their fingers the wrong way for three or I forget what it was. And they posted that picture in response

to an obvious like Russian bot or something that said, uh, people in Georgia, USA have been found to be eating their pets. And it was clearly like, Oh, a bot or some person who's trying to, you know, get their finger in. Be provocative. Be provocative, but nobody in America would say, Georgia, USA. And so they posted the picture of the fingers going up, being like, you're out of your element. This is not how people do things here. That's funny.

That's really funny. Look, we've all heard that they're eating the pets thing. But the end of that sentence where Trump goes, they're eating the pets of the people who live there. It's like, you're just saying what you just said in a different way. They're eating the pets of the people who live there. Yeah.

It's like those old 50s sci-fi monster movies, like an Ed Wood type of movie. The narration is always like five more words than you need to say. So it'll be like, they were eating the pets of the people who live there. We wouldn't know what pets were there. Where's the owner?

In case you thought they were bringing pets from outside the neighborhood area. That's so funny to me, like just the comedy of like being mildly redundant. Somebody pointed out we wrote a sketch and that at the end of the sketch, it was just one person on stage and we were like, that person exits, lights down. And then we were like, wait, wait. Why did we have the person exit before the lights stop? So the audience knows that he didn't live

in that room forever. He went on, he left. This is done here. Where we are, folks? This room, this fake room, nobody's in there. What was the word you guys described the guys getting scared by a snake sketch? And you couldn't use the word snake twice?

The long reptile. We were trying to write log lines for our sketches for a breakdown. and we said, two campers encounter a snake and they try not to get bit by the long reptile. It is tough because like what sounds stupider? Like saying snake twice or I mean both sound very dumb. Both sound very dumb. Both sound very dumb. We did a whole sketch, man, we should fucking play this

at the watch party coming up, God damn. That would be, yeah. What was the great lines that were cut, the sketch that we did? Oh yeah, from different movies, like. Yeah, it was like great lines that were cut or something. And it was just us putting ourselves back when it was new and novel to do into movies and just kind of.

And then it would be like the scene from Jaws where he sits up in a boat and he's like, we're going to need a bigger boat. And then Chris in the background is like, we're going to need a bigger boat. we're gonna need a bigger boat. And then Chris in the background is like, we're gonna need a bigger boat. Shush. I'm just teasing him. Like, the impactful line,

but there's another guy there saying it too. He's like the rest of the people though. Well, you know, he's not here, but Mike Mitchell, he's very, very funny. I would shower him with compliments as well if he was here. But he did the sketch that was a you know the Hungry Screenwriter. So when the sketch starts and it's like, hey, I'm gonna read your script. And the guy shares that he didn't eat much before he wrote it. So you're like, as an audience member,

you're like appreciating like, okay, this is funny. This is gonna somehow the script will weave in that the guy was hungry as he wrote it. I see where it's going. Maybe in a subtle, gradual way. Yes, the subtle, gradual way. It'll be like, it'll lightly begin, and then we know sketches, like the more it goes, the more it'll increase, and the wilder it will get.

Bitch, it was the guy picked up the script and read, exterior, surface of a to Rio. We're already there. We're already at beat five. But it also just the the the the the wording of that is so not appetizing. Also, it's not like, oh, my mouth was watering. It's like the surface of a Dorito. It's not even Dorito Factory.

It's like this comical, you're picturing a moon landing with like a face on top of a Dorito. And then some world of Honey I Shrunk the Kids or something where somebody's standing on it. And then I world of Honey I Shrunk the Kids or something. Yeah, yeah. Where somebody's standing on this. And then I remember the next, the next beat was something like a helicopter coming down. Well, first he has to rationalize it and be like, you gotta, I'm sorry, that was a typo. You gotta keep reading.

It's supposed to say jungle. That's what he said. I meant to type jungle. It's supposed to say, sorry, it's supposed to say jungle. And then a helicopter, a helicopter descends, kicking up nacho cheesier dust. So it's not even different foods. That is such a perfect Mitch sketch, because it's like. That was supposed to say jungle dust.

Jungle dust. We all know Jungle Dust. That is such a perfect Mitch sketch because it's A, written very well, but like, we're talking about food, but also talking about like very cinematic stuff, which he's very like, he knows movies very well and he is very cinematic. But it's so funny. Mitch is the biggest moviegoer I know in my life. By a mile.

He sees everything, yeah. He's seen everything. It's crazy. But sees it in the theater, which is wild. Yes, he goes to the movies and see movies. And I respect it. And I also wish I could, and not and not unlike a I wish I could do that Yeah, it's like I that would be make me my life so

I'd be so fulfilled and happy I go to the movies and I get to see it, you know movies that come up and I'm fulfilled and happy but hey going to the movies is fun I'm fulfilled and happy, but hey, going to the movies is fun. But hey, we can always have a little more. Yeah, and I remember it finally clicked with me how much Mitch goes to the movies once. I bumped into him on the sidewalk, and I was like, hey, what's up? And he was like, oh, I went and just saw Haywire.

Do you remember that movie Haywire? No, no. It was this like Stephen Soderbergh movie that was out for like two and a half weeks. Oh. Did it have the UFC girl in it? Yes. Yes.

Oh. What's her name? She was huge for a minute there. She was in Mandalorian and got booted for. Hey, let's not be a, it's not about body image. OK? Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute. She was huge. She was huge.

Her big fat ass took up the whole screen. Mike. Ronda Rousey, it was Ronda Rousey. Oh, Ronda Rousey. Yeah, OK. Is that who it was? Rowdy Ronda Rousey. She was huge for a second. And then Mike. Yeah, she was in that entourage movie.

Entourage movie. No, no, that's Gina Carano. Gina Carano. Gina Carano. And she's she's the one on Mandalorian who got fired for saying some wax shit. Oh, I remember that. That was season one of the DeLorean. Oh, that's why when I watched Haywire, her whole character been replaced by Jar Jar.

Yeah, they had to swap. That's why. Mesa need work. All right. You're a commuter. You're CGI. So stop animating him to say that. This isn't going to be a let's rag on episode one, because once Nick Weigar once said, I have been in more conversations about how episode one

was bad than Star Wars is good. But what I did watch it, Jar Jar, you know, I love the Roger Rabbit, Jar Jar's straight up Roger Rabbit. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. You can see that he's got the floppy ears, and he kind of walks the same, and Qui-Gon

grabs his tongue and stuff. It was almost like a George Lucas song, whatever. Oh, this is how you make this human and cartoon combo work. You have to do it in this exact way. If you have an animated character and a live action character, you have This is how you make this human and cartoon combo work. You have to do it in this exact way. If you have an animated character and a live action character, you have to recreate that comic relationship.

Yeah, yeah, that's all well and good, but where's the Jessica Rabbit? Ooh! I'm really glad. Mad, mad. Oh, let me guess, she was huge? I went to Disney World in Florida, and my parents thought it'd be funny

if I got my picture with Jessica Rabbit. It wasn't a real person. It was like a standee in Toontown or whatever. Yeah. But so I got my picture with Jessica Rabbit, and I was like probably like fourth grade or something like that. And my boner was probably two inches long.

Two inches long. Two inches long. And then I remember going home and then getting maybe only a year older and being like, I'm going to see if I can find those Disney pictures. And going into the thing and grabbing the picture of me and Jessica Rabbit and being like, this is coming with me up to my bedroom. Yeah. My old flame. Did you fold the Jessica Rabbit part back? Ooh, Dupst and his Prime.

No, this is pre-Jack-Off. I just knew inherently something in my brain was like, this needs to come with me. This is pre-Jackoff, this is pillow rub era. Oh! You know, when you were mentioning the eating a pizza and that's how you put a whole pizza in your mouth or the Coke and Pepsi song, a bit that A Kiss from Daddy, our sketch

group did all the time in rehearsals and stuff. And we never wrote it in a sketch, but it would always make us laugh was, did you guys ever hear, it was like a character who's afraid he's going to poop gray? Yeah. No. So the sketch would be like a guy on a toilet being like, oh no. Oh, I remember this. It's going to be gray.

Why? And then it would continue and he'd be like, oh, it's never been gray before. But I just know it's going to be gray. Then the sketch ends with him standing up, buckling his pants, looking into the toilet and crying and going, uh, it wasn't gray. So he kind of secretly wanted it to be gray. Yes, yes. I also, I know gray and it's funny because I never heard that, don't know that bit, but I know other bits of you being like, dark gray. Gray. The word gray

being very big in your repertoire. That's our show. Follow us on social media. We release these recipes ahead of time. And if you can't get enough sloppy boys, go to patreon.com slash the sloppy boys. That's where you get the bonus. They had double pleasure every week.

Thank you guys so much for having me on the pod here. Oh, thanks for coming on. Thank you. This is so funny, when I ran into you at Albertsons, I was complaining to you about having guests on a podcast. Yeah. It was like, we gotta have you on. And then I was like,

but booking guests is such a pain in the ass, huh? No, it's awesome because I go get groceries the same time you guys do. So we're always crossing paths. Yeah, I booked in two a lot. That's fun. Look, that part is great, but I felt clumsy that I was like,

just shitting on the idea of having to get guests. And then the next day I was like, do you wanna come on the pod? Do you wanna do that thing I hate? Forget what I said. It was a true pleasure and I'm glad you worked through those awful feelings of having to book a guest to make it happen. Yeah, you grew, Jeff. That's cool. Paul, it took a village. You're a top tier guest.

Paul, you got Saturday night, you got Great North, you got Don't Stop, you got Gorley and Russ, you got it all. Yeah, and oh, while you mentioned it before, people, a lot of times, Neil Campbell and I, we will livestream Playhouse Masterpieces, so people can check out on our socials. If you're in LA, see that show live.

It is not one to miss. It's the second Friday of every month at the Elysian, and then sometimes live streamed. And yeah, mark my words, it's the closest you'll get. If you have always wondered, hey, I never got to be around for not too shabby, 2 AM in 2007 on a Friday night. Yeah, it exists one night a month I can watch her after quick and funny musicals improv

Or rip thing or wait there was some musical one before us rip thing. Yeah, the thing that delighted us most of the like sub optimal sketches or characters that had been on that stage, but felt the need to sign the back of the wall backstage at UCB. Was this character, do you guys remember the character? Dustin Powers, and it was just Austin Powers. It was like, not in a clever way.

Dustin Powers. It was like, not in a clever way. You can't do that. Dustin. I think you're allowed to do that. Same joke, same voice, but different person. Dustin and Garth. I know Jeff's trying to end the show and I'm not saying this fast, but I was just thinking of playoffs and truly maybe the funniest thing that I've seen in the last year was a Fran moment with you in playoffs where Fran's bit. You were, you were playing like the doorman in the lobby and Fran was going

to walk out with a cloak over and like pretend to be an old lady, but then you ever like said anything mean to her, this was like an impor- you know Playhouse Masterpieces So it's improvised. You don't know what you guys don't know each other's bits. She's like I'm gonna act like an old Crow, you know like an old lady and it's a crone and then if Paul says anything mean I'm gonna whip off this cloak and reveal that I'm a beautiful princess with a gown and I'm gonna shame him So that was what she was thinking and you're playing this doorman in a lobby I'm gonna whip off this cloak and reveal that I'm a beautiful princess with a gown, and I'm gonna shame him. So that was what she was thinking, and you're playing this doorman in a lobby. She walks out, and the first thing you said is like,

get out of here, you old lady, and she had to just immediately, like she was barely on the stage, and she had to like, she's like taking two steps on the stage and throws her cloak off and goes, I'm really a princess. And it was like, the fastest, fastest reveal. The princess. It was like the fastest, fastest. It was the timing of it was like, as if you guys had rehearsed.

It was so, and then it was like, and then Paul was like, I don't think you heard princess or something came up that she was a pop star. Then she had to like go into some other big thing. Yes. Immediately. Fran is beyond funny. And I would say she's probably the number one person who I'll later

think of something she said and laugh out loud to myself as I recall the things she said. She's the best. At play houses I'm always trying to remember lines from it because it's always like, god dammit. Yeah, she's the best. Fran is so, she is such a funny performer. Yes, yes, yes.

And writer and everything, but she's so funny. Yes, 1000%. I love you, Franny. Alright, I'm gonna, I'm jumping off this one. This is too much. Yeah, I gotta jump off too. I'm hanging, I'm hanging. Tim's gonna hang for a bit.

Alright, bye folks. We'll see you next week. Bye. Bye. Give it up for your boys. Give it up for your boys. Give it up for your boys. Give it up for your boys. Thanks for watching!