The Sloppy Boys - 92. Monte Carlo

Episode Date: July 22, 2022

The guys stir up a classic riff on the Manhattan.MONTE CARLO RECIPE2oz/60ml Rye Whiskey.5oz/15ml Benedictine1 dash Angostura BittersAdd ingredients into a mixing glass with ice and stir for about 30 seconds until well-chilled. Strain into a chilled rocks glass over a large ice cube. Garnish with lemon zest.Recipe via Liquor.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy, which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. Hey folks, welcome to the Sloppy Boys, where we take a deep dive into the drinks that you love. I'm Jeff Dutton, along with Mike Hanford. I still haven't seen the Gru movie. And Tim Kalpakis.

What is up, Riviera stylies? Ooh, French Riviera? Yes. American american riviera what does riviera mean river i'm sure we'll get into it yes yes no just tell us now what is riviera i don't know i think i thought it was like river era like the era you know if you're in your river era doing a lot of tubing yeah oh like when you used to listen to Weezer. Stop it. I have no patience today. Tim, you've been gone. Tim, you've been gone.

Hey, come on now. Yours was better because you worked in the thing. I just kind of sang the song. Go ahead, Jeff, ask your question. I did. When are you coming back? Where you been? How you feeling?

Well, Timothy's gone. I forget my own song where has i woke up in the morning and where has timothy gone i've been gone um okay do you actually have a segment uh prepared or are you just going through the song no no i've been sort of i guess you would call me a globe trotter this past month but the globe really only just kind of goes to like Detroit and New York and Louisville, Kentucky and sort of boring places that are easy to get to. You're an American vagabond. I've been kind of airing out a bit. My body stunk. Sure. a bit my body stunk sure yeah i had to get it out of la but right now i'm in i'm in upstate new york kingston beautiful the type of place that makes you feel really stupid for living in uh la or new york city i'll tell you this time of year too my god it's it's cool i'm uptown they got

cool you could have a cool job here you could go to cool places but then also hey the other night i wanted to go go to woodstock to see a band 10 minutes in the car i'm in a mountain paradise yesterday i want to go to mohawk mountain house and and look at the view mohawk or hawk mohawk mohawk it's mohawk really yeah huh um now mohawks up here you know when it's uh it's good because we're on the same coast now so i can see it's we're getting into the twilight hour you you open the door you hear the crickets outside yeah the crickets coming in the crickets are outside hey can me and my fellow you got a ladybug we've got we have fireflies uh

uh uh lightning bugs to our southern listeners um I'll here's a New York

thing for you I've got a I got a big beautiful Airbnb it's fantastic I got the whole family over here and

my family was cooking dinner I look in the fridge you know what my dad's got in the fridge? I haven't opened the jar yet, but Mike, Sabret onion sauce.

That stuff we were talking about. You saw it in the jar, but you didn't buy it. Things are different if you're David Kalpatnik. He buys the jar. Hey, I haven't even seen the jar. Jeff, I don't know where to start with you.

You know, they sell it in a bag too, but I didn't want to get the bag. A bag? The bag. Sort of a Zip-Locky type of sealed bag of onion mush. Nasty. No thanks. Well, it's nice visiting the East Coast. You get all four seasons out there, which

is nice. Summer's peaking. I mean, hey, we were down in the Hamptons. Four seasons, you get the Temptations, all that doo-wop stuff. Hey, me and Hanford saw the Winklevoss twins out in the Hamptons. Oh, yeah. That was great. They covered Rage Against the Machine. Come on now.

Covered Rage. They played some Pearl Jam, some Red Hot Chili Peppers, I think, was their best stuff because it was less, it was just kind of like scat singing, you know. Yeah, just really good. It was good. If you want to hear that real California rap, you come out to the Hamptons.

Yeah. Yeah, I'd see that. Man, the Winklevosses singing Rage Against the Machine in the Hamptons is so. It was great. It was wonderful. We really hampted it up. We were...

I saw David Portnoy's house. I mean, come on. This was a Hamptons thing going on. Tim walked up. He said, review this. And he does a Walter White pizza toss up on the roof. Gadouge. He Walter Whited the fucking thing. That's me on the street. He fucking Walter whited the fucking thing that's me on this on the street he fucking

walter whited the fucking thing you are walter whiting that pie dude our uber driver's like this is still running what yeah you boys have any money now now and uh it was i thought we had a deal we were going to show you portnoy's house. I don't know who he is. I don't care. We had an Uber driver. We were coming home from, we went to a bar on Montauk. We were coming home in an Uber going down, like, the one street that goes through all of Long Island, it seemed, or the Hamptons. And, well, we hit some traffic, and our driver played the Miley Cyrus Party in the USA. As some fireworks were going.

And he put on strobe party lights, and we were like, yeah! Disco lighting. And it was like, awesome. This is great. We've all had a few. No, we had some fun. Those are our celebrity friends. Yeah.

And it was like, we're all going nuts. And we're watching some fireworks out the front window. They start going off, so it's great. And then it starts to get a little more traffic-y and he pulls off to a side street we think is going to be a shortcut. I'm sitting in the front, so I fist-bumped him. I said, yeah, it's great. And then we pull into this parking lot,

which he thought was another cut-through. It was not. It was because cops were leading traffic in this way because it is like deadlock traffic. Meanwhile, the song Party in the USA has ended and he plays it again. And you know when he starts that song, it's like those chords. And we're like, oh, okay, weird. So at this point, we like stop and I got out and we kind of watched the fireworks because we weren't going anywhere.

And then we eventually got back in and moved and he played. I think he played Party in the USA five times in a row. We were losing our fucking minds. I look back and Jessica was like, had her fingers up to her temples, like looking down at the ground. Yeah. I was all being too nice.

And then I think Fran was like, what else we got on the playlist? Yeah, after it ended, we were like, what else we got? And then we got out because the traffic was not going anywhere. So we were like, alright, we're just going to step out here and we'll wait for a while. Waited two hours at this other bar with

another cover band playing. And they played Party in the USA. They did. What a moment when I heard those first chords of that song. I'd be like return to hell i think it was outside at that point just like sitting on a bench like being wanting to leave i love watching cover bands man they were great that was a band called hello brooklyn i loved them i loved mars junction i saw a guy the night before that too like lots of people are just

playing pop punk hits of the 90s right now and it's so much more fun look i love the mellow sounds of the 70s but i don't think really need to hear margaritaville out at a bar ever again but now that it's sort of like you can expect to hear like cause i'm in too deep great it's a lot more fun yeah man i haven't yeah i gotta see some more cover bands hey we were a cover band. How about that? Yeah, but then we got too good at songwriting. We veered away from that. Cover bands can go on to great things.

Yeah. That's what we told the Winklevoss twins. We saw them in their tour bus. They had a huge tour bus out front. Oh, my God. We went in their tour bus. And said Mars Junction on the side as if they were like huge rock stars. No, no.

And we saw them pull a three-point turn in traffic. The venue was really cool, though. It was like a bunch of bars in this little rock and roll place. Sick. Stephen Talkhouse? That's right. One other thing that

relates to this podcast, I know that listeners enjoy content that relates to them. I was drinking because i thought it would be funny on long island to drink a lot of long island iced teas i know people don't really drink them there but i ordered them a lot and at the that other bar the the melody motel where we we saw the kids that played party in the usa bartender uh made my long island and the whole time was like i don't like making these. It's a bad drink. Make the fucking thing.

If you want it, I'll make it for you, but it's a real bad drink. And I said, well, I'm kind of, I'm sort of funny. I'm being winky about it.

I'm kind of a little Mr. Funny Man. Oh, at that same bar, at the, at the bar, they had bubble guns, you know, those like,

Oh yeah. The new ones? Not so... Like, there are better ones than this. But they gave me one, and I asked for it. I was like, can I take this out for a little while? They're like, you got to bring it back. I said, okay.

I went up to the front where the band was playing. I was bubbling. And Tim, what I thought Tim was shooting me, he was maybe doing some slow motion. It was really cool. I thought it was good. And we did the, you know, he pushed stop when he wanted to push play and play when he wanted to stop. I'm recording. I've got a video of just like, yeah, my phone coming up from the floor and then back down to the floor.

And me going, was it cool? And me being like, yes, yes. So fucking cool. So fucking cool. I can't wait to post this. And we also had fireball shots at one point. Okay, that's enough shit, Chad. We've got...

And you're talking real deal fireball. Yes. Out of a liquor bottle, not a little plastic bottle. It served in eight packs. Alright. Let's tend to the latest in booze news. Yes. Let's tend to the latest in booze news. Yes.

Tim? Hit it! Can we get married at the mall? Mm-hmm. Bip-bip. Bip-bip. Bip-bip. Bip-bip.

Bip-bip. Bip-bip. Bip-bip. Classic chord progression That's the end? Okay, great. Seems so. That theme was sent to us by Alan Press. And if you have a Boots News theme, email it to thesloppyboyspodcast at gmail.com. I got some news before you get into anything, Tim. I just turned down my input volume.

I think I was peaking like crazy, so the audience probably thinks, oh, Mike stepped away from his mic. No, no. I've turned down the input volume. Now, Jeff, the editor of the podcast, is that going to be a problem for you that he turned it down mid-pod? Now, Tim, that's a great question. You sound good to me, Mike.

Thank you. We'll be fine. I could just see my oh my the volume bars were shooting off to the edge yeah of my put time record oh my god

this is so inside baseball it makes me sick well speaking of shooting off to the edge let's shoot off to the edge of sanity with

today's booze news article uh this sent to us by the kangaroo on the discord uh from the takeout.com uh blog vegetable cocktails are the new impossibly cool bar order and that links to an article in bloomberg london's latest drink craze is the vegetable martini now there's a lot of talk in these articles about we're talking everybody knows about you know martinis can have i mean olives i mean can i just jump in and say like how different is this than a bloody mary oh well a bloody mary is certainly the most famous of the veggie cocktails but what we got here is people are making tomato

martinis so it's a martini but it's got like a little bit of hey it's like v8 and vodka no no no it's more like remember i had something like this remember at cantiki in glendale i got a dirty tomato martini and it's sort of like pickled tomato it's like the juice from a pickled tomato jar or something um but then also i i went to bestia and i got like a snow pea like a blended snow pea cocktail that tastes like a garden i've definitely noticed these things going on but they're so yeah they're they But so, yeah, we're not talking Bloody Mary. We're talking about like martinis that are getting other vegetables involved. Interesting.

And they're like thick and blended? No, no, no. These are elegant cucumber martinis. Okay. So it's more about the garnish and like a little bit of a drip of a sauce. I think it's that earthy taste. It's an earthy taste and like the way that you're using that olive or the olive juice. Now we're getting celery and avocado.

Gotcha. All that stuff in the mix. I'd like to try some of these. I like any opportunity to have a savory drink. I've said before, I'll say it again. Why are all the drinks sweet, folks? Get your bullshots out, you know?

And hey, you know, we already decided on the blowout that the best vegetable is the potato. You know, a lot of vodka can come from potatoes. I want to see a martini that you squeeze a little potato juice on top and have a wedge of a chip

on top. And there's a fucking chip on the edge. A chip on top. And there's a chip in it. A ruffle. I've had potato. I had like Polish potato vodka and it didn't taste potato-y at all. But remember last winter, Arby's put out the crinkle cut. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We couldn't get our hands on the bottle.

I guess we aren't as VIP as we think we are. But I like the scent of potato. That's too bad. we are. But I like to sit on a potato. I feel like I go to Arby's a lot. You are our Arby's champion. I love Arby's. You do rep Arby's. Mike, you might be the only person. I don't think Arby's is bad.

But if I do go there, I'm not really just probably getting the original. I'm the only one there. I'll say this. I know In-N-Out people. I know McDonald's people. You're the only, the one and only person who's an Arby's guy. I don't know a single other person that said to me, Arby's? Want to get the roundup?

You can go wherever you want. I'm going to Arby's. It's that sauce. Ooh, that sauce. The horsey sauce or the cheese sauce? A little of both you bad boy uh-huh um the horsey sauce the barbecue sauce they got there okay another thing i wanted to mention oh wait a final note on the veggie cocktails it's reminding me that uh you know contest winner and correction

issuer neil campbell told us he's seen a couple cocktails with olive oil in them recently so we're keeping our eyes on that good good thing about that kanger brought that in that's good good on him i had heard about this trend and i forgot to look it up and bring it in so thank you kanger for picking up the slack on my end i love it it when the Slapheads over on the Discord are helping me out. Speaking of, I love seeing things we've talked about on the pod, making their way out into the world more. You know, we talked about how the spaghetti was from Baltimore, but you're seeing it more.

The other night, I'm here in Kingston at Stockade, a very good fancy cocktail bar that makes pre-prohibition kind of cocktails but then on their specials menu spaghetti yeah cool they get it how they spell it they spell it with an h yeah did they put do they put it in a different glass or keep it in the highlight? They did it in the bottle and then Slopheads, Dan Padley and Slophead power couple Jesse and Neil were in

Omaha and they went to, they sent me this thing. They were at Bartender's Handshake in Des Moines. Wait, where's Des Moines? Iowa. There you go. They were at this bar and they saw a drink called Lakewater that was a Miller High Life Pony with Beefeater gin in it.

So I'm not the only one experimenting with putting new liquids into the... I like Beefeater. When I get a martini, I know it's not the most fancy gin, but I kind of say, hey, put some Beefeater in it if you got it. Mike, when I was at Mohonk yesterday, I got a Tom Collins with beef eater. Nice. Get beefy with it. Na, na, na, na, na, na, na.

Keep my wife's name out your mouth. And that wraps up Booze News. I've got something to add to Booze. Oh, unwrap it. No, wait. This is bad. This was bad timing. You were talking about glasses and how things are served.

I went to this bar a couple nights ago, and it was right before I saw the movie Black Box. No, Black Telephone. Oh, I saw that. Black Phone. The Black Telephone. Yeah, yeah. Not my favorite movie.

Oh, doing a little Jeff Goldblum. Not my favorite movie. But that's not the point. Before I went to the movie, I went to this little speakeasy-ish bar on the east side. I forget what it was called. But it was like you go downstairs and you're in basically a trash alley and then get into this back area. A nice little room. But they served all the drinks in like little kind of like tea cups, tea coffee cups kind of.

And it was like a martini. I got a martini and it came in that and I was like, this sucks. Like a mug? A mug, but a little more like beveled, let's say. At Stockade, I had a Philadelphia fish house punch and it was in a teacup. I don't like this. No, let's not go down this teacup road.

I don't like it. I don't like this. Let's not go down this teacup road. I don't like it. I don't like having my finger in the little hole it feels like straight. Yep. And I want a martini glass, please. I want to circle back to something. You mentioned you were in a trash alley. I think that Donald Trump's presidency was a

whole trash alley. Ooh, dumpster fire. Right. Right. Yeah, I think that's what people are saying. A Trumpster fire. Right, right. Yeah, I think that's what people are saying. A Trumpster fire, they should say. Maybe they're saying a Trumpster hired me.

Like, if you're Scaramucci, there was a Trumpster hire. Yes, yes. Well, I'll have to go back to the Twitter feed and see what people are saying. Yeah, yeah, me too. Jeff, okay.

I think I've... That's it for Booze News. I'm guessing that's from a Nintendo game? Yes. Okay. I think it's from Mario, some type of Mario 2. It's from Zelda 1. Well, you know what?

Zelda. Zelda, the game of Link. Yep. Yes. Zelda is not the main player in that. Correct. Zelda is the princess. Yep.

You're playing as Link. You're Link. Stinky Link. Stinky Link, they call him. Hey, what did you do in the bathroom there, Link? I laid out a stinky link. Is that a level of the video game?

That's why I don't play it. Lay down your stinkiest link. Well, that just leaves the drink of the day, I suppose. Get her done. Today we're talking about one of the it's an old drink. It's not on the IBA.

This thing is ancient. It's derived from the old fashioned. Or the Manhattan, even, let's say. Today we're talking about the Monte Carlo you've had. No. I've not had, I've not heard. I've had a Monte Cristo sandwich. I should say I've seen someone eat a Monte Cristo sandwich.

I saw somebody, Mike, on a Saturday morning. No, if you saw someone eating a sandwich, you don't get to say. You can't say. I also have never eaten a Monte Cristo. I always see it. It's a deep fried ham sandwich. You're like, I've got to get that. I've never remembered to order it.

It was my friend in college. I went to visit my friend in college. It was a deep fried ham sandwich. You're like, I gotta get that. I never remembered to order it. It was my friend in college. I went to visit my friend in college. Who was your friend in college? I saw a guy two days ago. Here, you're talking about Toronto? No, this was in, uh, this was in, uh, where the hell was he? Harvard, probably? We were in

Cambridge, Mass, maybe? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But anyway, it was his friend who ate one, and his nickname, he was a big guy, they called him Big Country. That's pretty cool. Oh, I've heard of people called Big Country. Yeah, well, he was one of them, and he ate a deep fried ham sandwich. Jeff,

we've derailed this too much. Yeah, sure. Anyone else see anything they want to report before we keep talking about drink? I saw two frogs this weekend. Right on. What did you see two frogs two frogs what were they getting nasty uh uh well they were saying hey ribbit and we'll have ribbit ribbit yeah budweiser okay okay wrap up booze news let's go yes this is an old one.

We talked about how the old-fashioned is called the old-fashioned because it's like one of the first cocktails, right? Yeah. Yeah. Make it the old-fashioned way. I tell that story so many times when I'm hanging out with people. They love it. They love it.

Now, do people, when you're telling that story, the people you're talking to, they have their eyes closed and they're doing kind of like a honk-shoe, honk-shoe. No, no. They're doing kind of like a honk shoe, honk shoe. No, no. They are rolling their eyes a lot. You've told us this before. You've told us.

Sir. You need to shut up. So this is one that doesn't have an origin. Jeff, can I tell you something? Not a lot of them do. Yeah, yeah. I know the origin. I'll guess it.

This one first appeared, so they say, in 1948 in David Embry's The Fine Art of Mixing Drinks. But then another one said, 1937 in Gale and Marco's The How and When. Gale. I believe that one because Gale's involved. Because it's Gale. This is a, it used to be called a scafa or a scafa, which is a kind of an Italian word, meaning a mixed libation that was not chilled and did not use ice. However, most modern iterations do use ice. Good.

Scafa may have been derived from the Italian for cupboard, suggesting that the drinks went from cupboard to glass to belly. Ooh, I like this. An out dick. Glons. Launching from glons, this. An out dick. Glons. Launching from glons, yes. Here's how you make it. Two ounces of rye whiskey, preferably stiff. We're talking 100 proof if you have it.

Woo! Half ounce of Benedictine DOM. Yeah, I got that. One dash Angostura bitters. Got that too. You will find yourself combining the ingredients in a mixing glass with ice and stirring, straining into an old-fashioned glass with a block of ice. Ooh, nice. Garnish with a lemon zest.

Ah, shit, I don't have that. A lot of them don't call for lemon zest, so that is truly optional. And this is a flexible drink, guys. You can dial things up or down. In fact, a lot of people say, don't use so much Benedictine because it's so sweet. Oh, here's my question, Jeffy. Could I use, I only have like whiskey, like a Jim Beam, I think. It's not rye.

But I'm going to play the dumb palette here. You'll be fine. Just assume it's all the same. Do you have any rye bread? You could dunk a little bread. Stop. I wouldn't mind a rye bread. A little pastrami.

Well, there was the marble rye on Seinfeld, but continue. Oh, God. Those two got up to some caper in that one, didn't they? Yeah, Mickey and Kramer. That was the one. Oh, it doesn't matter. Jeff. That was main hands. Yes. it doesn't matter. Jeff. That was main hands.

Yes. Could I use a scotch whiskey? Too much. Yeah, no. I think you could use a scotch. Because a scotch is like. Do you have bourbon? Like, if you have Jim Beam, that's maybe closer.

Yeah, I have Jim Beam. I'll use that. I mean, round two, scotch it up. Jeff, how did this drink come across your desk? Well, our buddy Brett Butler texted me about it. I love it. And look, a lot of friends text me like, let's try

this one. But Brett alerted us to the New York shrub. Copy, copy. He's a good dude. Let me tell you. Here's my theory. I think that this is, it looks to me i'm saying this is a manhattan with benedictine instead of sweet red vermouth yeah and benedictine yeah is french made by french monks it's france monte carlo is on the french riviera i don't

think it's actually technically in france it might be in Monaco or something weird. It's like the fun casino gambling spot on the French Riviera. I'm guessing this drink is just from New York, but whoever came up with it was like, it's a Manhattan, but I put this French...

I don't even know if Benedictine is popular in France, but they're kind of being like, what's a French name for this thing? and then it's just kind of funny to say monte car i'm not funny but cool it's like the gambling town yeah it's just like uh oh this is sort of like the international man's version of the manhattan that's what i think went down i found out that um benedictine that's just like a marketing thing it's not actually made by the monks it's it was made by like really it was made by a wine merchant named alexandra lagrand they're stealing valor from the charthusian monks that make chartreuse and uh the dom on on the front the dom stands for deo Optimo Maximo.

To God, most good, most great. I thought it was D-O-M because the three of us are doms in the bedroom. Doms, yes. The three of us? Yeah, you know, the three of us. Well, you got your dom and you got your sub. You can't have three doms, Tim. But that's what the problem.

Everyone always asks us, how come you guys are in a thruple? We say, well, we tried one time. We all showed up with whips, trying to whip each other. Just a whipping circle. We all whipped each other right around it. We all were just whipping out into the air, no one to get spanked. But DOM was a dedication used by Benedictine monks in the beginning of

their documents, and it's a marketing ploy. Not actually made by Benedictine monks, but it sold the stuff, didn't it? It certainly sold it on me. What did we use this Benedictine dom for? Right, because I have some and I don't know where it came from. Yeah. God, that's

going to kill me. What is that? It's something that had a lot of other ingredients. Is it like a tiki? I mean, you know, of course i want to guess zombie but no i i don't think it was i think it was oh that fucking kills me but i'll tell you what kills me even more is me being on vacation in kingston knowing i've got a bottle of this fucking shit in la i had to go to a liquor store and buy another $40 bottle of it today.

No, no. Now I got one on each coast, you're telling me? No, that's good, though, because you're going to want those 27 spices wherever you can grab them. But now I'm going to be forced, all my friends here are going to have to be drinking Benedictine neat for the rest of the trip. Fuck that. And quite frankly, fuck everything. I did get a good rye. I got a local rye I'm excited about. And if I have leftover Angostura, I'm going to make

fucking Trinidad Sours. Now, are you, Tim, are you near Rye, New York? No. Is that in the Westchester County area? Yeah, that's south of me. I know I've never been there, but I know that the Rangers practice in right now. Westchester County, that's where Xavier's school is.

But anyway. Seriously, folks, moving on. Hey, Benedictine was in the Singapore Sling. There you go. Ah, yes. Yes, yes. And we had to use a quarter of an ounce. So you bought the bottle for a quarter of an ounce so you bought the bottle for a quarter

of an ounce fucking full i remember it being good but it has that kind of generic taste of liqueurs not unlike uh you know like chartreuse or that like uh that amaro and no no no no amaro no nino no nino you know they taste good but you're like yeah yeah it's like it's if it's not gonna have a black licorice taste it's the other taste it's sort of like mainly it's like sugar with a little bit of a flower petal at the end yeah it's it reminds me of dr pepper also like anything that's like hey it's 27 different yeah yeah flavors uh benedictine says it's 27 different flowers herbs berries, berries, roots, and spices. Wow.

There's probably a nut in there, too. There's three nuts on my fucking Zencaster right now. That's enough of that. Okay. What? Enough. That's, you bite your tongue. I've had it.

All right, folks, why don't we go make these drinks, and we'll see you back here after the ads. Great. Calling all slop heads kidding of course but on a serious note folks this is uh calpique what is up just want to let you know that on august 4th 2022 the sloppy boys are going to be playing at the lodge room in highland park los angeles california it's going to be Matt Gourley's band Townland, then us, and then Don't Stop or We'll Die. We're talking Paul Rust, Mike Cassidy, Tony Thaxton, Amin Zaroukian.

The Lodge Room is a cool old venue. We've been looking forward to playing there forever. This night's going to rock, so come on out and have a good time. and we're back see i'm not sure i'm trying not to do the jimmy fallon and we're back i think that you own it now he i watched uh the tonight show last night he didn't do it no i mean like the snl like you remember he in that sketch where he was like, I'm back. He was like the morning radio guy. I remember.

I'm a comedy historian. You're from the same town as him, Tim. Yeah. Socrates, right near Kingston where I am right now, folks. Socrates or Socrates? Soccer teams. Right on. Well, here we are with our...

What do you call these again? Here we are with our... What do you call these again? Here we are with our Monte Carlos. Whoa. How many sips of that Benedictine Dom did you have? I took a little sip. Come on. It's good. I liked it.

I stole sips. Delicious. I also stole sips of my rye and it was delicious. It's going to be a good drink. What did you use for your rye? Hudson, New York rye and it was delicious. It was going to be a good drink. What did you use for your rye? Hudson, New York rye. Local whiskey. Elijah Craig

over here. Bye bye, Miss American Pie. Oh, shimmy to the limit. Okay, first sip. You know when you sing that you remind me of Don McLean. Ooh, Don Henry.

Who's okay? Who's Don Henry? Sips or what? Yeah, I took mine. Nobody? I'm going to look up Don Henry after this. I went to high school with Kevin Henry. Are you thinking of that? Guys, you're killing me. Oh, is this

bad podcasting? It's not great. Alright, we have to record these and release them. These are people listening to this shit, is this bad podcasting? It's not great. All right, we have to record these and release them. These are people listening to this shit, is there? Okay, well, I like this, and I'll say, to those who warned you, Jeff, to go easy on the Benedictine, that's not a... Don't worry about it. They're wrong.

There's no sugar. There's no sugar in this drink. This drink's not sweet at all. It's delicious. All I'm tasting is a mellowed out rye. Mmm. This is, um... This has hints of the Manhattan

in it, yes, yes. But, uh... Yes, it is true. But I like the... I don't like Manhattans and I am enjoying this thus far. You don't like Manhattans? No, no, no. But in old-fashioned you wouldn't kick an old-fashioned out of bed, would you? Uh, You don't like Manhattans? No, no, no. But in old-fashioned you wouldn't kick an old-fashioned out of bed, would you?

I don't bring drinks to bed, Jeff. I'm very spilly. But you prefer it to a Manhattan? Old-fashioned to a Manhattan? Yeah. For sure. I made myself a very bad Manhattan in our Manhattan episode, and since then have had several

good Manhattans. But this is nice and bright and light. This is like got that warm your whole chest up thing. You take one sip and you're like, I don't need

to get to the next sip just for a second. I'm going to enjoy that one for a minute. It's a long time. I have that same thing where I took a sip and I noticed my next sip on my Google calendar was coming up pretty soon, and I moved the meeting.

I push it back a few seconds. Who will be attending? My lips, teeth, tongue, and gums. Mike, just say mouth. All right. I like to try. I'm trying to be more poetic these days. Mike, just say mouth. All right. I like to try. I'm trying to be more poetic these days. Oh, boy.

Well, don't use this as your fucking guinea pigs. This. Oh, I had. I never used these, but I had like one of those big. I've got a ice tray that makes six big like square ice cubes. And I never really used. I had one that had like the circular ones, but I can never get the thing to seal correctly. So it was always like half ice cubes and those really use my head I had one that had like the circular ones but I can never get the thing to seal correctly so it was always like half ice cube oh you talking about the circle version mm-hmm yeah same

they're very difficult I was singing kiss from a rose the other day but I just couldn't seal correctly you couldn't seal correctly? Yeah. You couldn't sing like seal correctly? Yeah. Yeah. You know, seal, I have... Now, Jeff, is that good podcasting? It's better. You already know when I hit the level.

He likes it. You know what is good podcasting? The seal, the seal bach quiz from our seal bach episode. And that I learned that old, old seal himself wanted to throw that song in the garbage. Yeah. Somebody said, no, no,

we need it for Batman. The rubbish probably. No, no, we need it for Batman. He needs my help. No, no,

we just need it for the movie. Oh, okay. But does Batman know? Yeah, yeah, Batman. Yeah,

he knows. He knows who wrote it. Hey, you know what I, what else I heard? A song came on that I was like, I know this song. Paula Abdul. Hey, you know what else I heard? A song came on that I was like, I know this song. Paula Abdul.

God, what's the song? Two steps forward, I take two steps back. Keep going, Jeff. Straight up. I know that. Straight up now, Tim. Do you want to be you and me forever? Oh, oh, oh.

That's a good karaoke song. I might put that in the in the mix that was one that everyone hated and she liked she was like no straight up's gonna be a hit her mom thought the demo was laughably bad and if you listen if you listen to it the verses are terrible you mean literally what are you saying i can't think of a better one. The meter is all off. It just sounds awful. Anyway.

Oh, you don't like it? You have proper meter if you sing a song. Jeff, you know what? You gotta chill, dude. No, no. Tell me. You need to relax and follow your fucking soul for once, not your dream. When it comes to people like Paula, me, Jeff, you just don't get it. Remember her opposites attract?

For the longest time, when I was a kid, I thought there was opposites subtract. Opposites subtract. I thought there was opposites subtract. Opposites subtract. She did a song, a music video, where she danced with an animated cat. And I think the cat maybe had a verse that he sang. He did. He had a rap. Oh, cool.

That's a pretty big feature. A cat. Mr. Meow. MC Scat Cat is an animated cat character who appeared in Paul Abdul. I don't know if he has any other work. Meow. MC Scat Cat is an animated cat character who appeared in Paul Abdul. I don't know if he has any other work. Sad. The whole time I was watching that video as a kid, I'd be like, how are they going to?

But he's made of ink and paper. I don't think he can. Well, that's good because Paula is not made of ink and paper, so they attract. Right, but I don't think what I was getting at is how are they going to make love, Jeff? Oh, hmm. Because I thought eventually that's where the relationship was going to go. Oh, hey.

No, Scat Cat has an album in 1991. Oh, wow. With 12 tracks on it. Jesus. Oh, my God. I wonder who Scat Cat really was. Yeah, really. That'd be so funny if it was an artist who was trying to make it,

and he's like, oh, shit, I guess I can just put my stuff out as Scat Cat because I was in that video. Damn. It's sort of like a gorilla's attempt, it seems like. Oh, yeah. I was going to say something. Oh, I was going to change the subject, but that's okay. Sure.

Speaking of older media, I was on Hulu the other day, and I realized that Hulu, I have stars in my Hulu package or whatever, and the show Party Down is on there. Yeah. And I watched an episode at random because it was just on. It just was on. But I went back today, and I started watching season one, episode one. It's great.

If you haven't seen that show, folks, watch it. It's very good. It's very ahead of its time. Everyone's funny in it and it's low. It's like one of those good comedy shows that's just like low production value. Easy idea. All the episodes take place at like, it's about a catering, uh, uh, company and each episode takes place at like a different catering event.

Yeah. You know, that's like the sort of premise that I feel like people think is a good idea, but doesn't really work. Like every episode is a different blank. Right. Like my name is Earl. Like quickly when you find out, like when you work on television that television, no, no, no. People like to return to the same thing that was good about the last episode they liked. They don't want a different X every episode. But Party Down does it really well.

The show wasn't popular and it got canceled after two seasons. Hey, a lot of shows are good after two seasons. They are good after two seasons. Oh, yeah. Are good after. The third season that never happened. They seem like a fun show to make because I heard that they would just have like, you know, four days at each place. So it's like, well, we're shooting at the boat or we're shooting at this wedding venue.

So they just like the trucks roll up. They set up the lights and they just shot for four days at one location. Yeah, and I had heard, to get technical, that the lighting was just like one of those big orb lights at the top, and they hang up in the middle of the room. China ball. China ball. And that was it. I'm sure they shot fast and had a lot of fun.

Yeah. Yeah, all they had to wear was, they just had to remember the pink bow ties. Costumes were all the same. That was always the last thing they'd be ready to shoot the entire cast um yeah let me ask you guys this you might recall that this episode was um stated to be riviera stylies oh yeah. And I think that that refers to probably the French Riviera of where Monte Carlo is. I want to ask you guys, because we're three untraveled guys.

We, that comes with quite a bit. I've been only to, I've been to France, but only just Paris, never Riviera. But when you guys think of the French Riviera, I was,

I was thinking of it today. And the, the, my, the today and the thing that I'm like, oh, I know the French Riviera because of this thing. It's a dumb thing and it might be the same for you guys. Do you have any, when you think of the French Riviera, is there? Tim, I think of a black void.

And you're picturing her right now? Yeah. I get nothing. And as much, even those contacts, it was like French and Riv and riviera you put those together just black it's just nothing i get nothing that's sad for me the french riviera is like a thing out of the 60s it's like a vacation spot for wealthy people uh maybe you come upon it in a book. Oh, like a James Bond book. Yeah.

While I thought you guys maybe would think of what I think of, which is the film Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. Please, never seen. A goofball 80s comedy where they're like scammers. never seen goofball 80s comedy where they're like scammers they're trying to like trick like old women they're lonely women out of their fortunes and stuff yeah and they're sort of like they're like riding on the train from like casino town to casino town um and but then also i want to say that terrible jackie chan movie we watched, The Tuxedo, when we were celebrating

our one year of the podcast and we wanted to watch the fanciest movie we could think of. No, was it the year? It was around then. Oh, maybe it was our 100th episode or something like that. Oh, yeah. We'll do Tuxedo the Drink in the Tuxedo movie.

Well, no, because we haven't done our hundredth yet have we no that's coming up coming up oh we should we should re-watch the tuxedo um but that i think that when he was being like a fancy guy and getting like tossed around a roulette table or whatever happened to him that was probably that was probably monte carlo now before tim when you were i'm looking at a map here, you said it's close to Morocco. I think you meant Monaco. Did you say Monaco or Morocco?

I definitely meant to say Monaco. Monaco. That's part of the French Riviera, I believe. Monaco is like one of those weird city-state municipality, whatever it is. It's not a country, but it's right there, isn't it monte carlo and uh

monaco and everything there's like it makes me think of um like grand prix racing i think there's a big grand prix race there with like the formula one cars yeah and it's like rich people show up with my t-bird yeah yeah maybe these these cars tim, from what I gather, are mighty fast. There was a De Niro movie called Ronin where he's racing around the streets of Nice in a car chase. Nice, that sounds pretty nice. It's interesting. There's a town called Nice, but then there's a car called Nissan. it's interesting there's a town called nice but then there's a car called nissan uh i have never heard of that brand of car but yeah i'll i'll take your word for it

hey you guys remember saturn that was a weird car oh yeah they don't yeah do they make those anymore my parents had a saturn i feel like it was a chrysler offshoot or something i think they were supposed to be like eco-friendly or recyclable. It always made me think, like, the bumpers were, like, rubber or something. Yeah. They were, like, plastic. They were all plastic cars. Well.

Let's buy one. What do you think of the drink, folks? Delicious. I'm liking it. I'm into it. I mean, the rye I use is 94 proof, which they tell you to use a high proof to counteract the Benedictine. My rye is one proof. The highest I could find.

Wait, what do you mean to counteract the taste or the... Just like they want you to start with like a nice stiff base so that when you put in that Benedictine, you're not making a little sweet treat. Who's worried about this Benedictine, man? We like sweet drinks here on the pod. Yeah. I mean, I'll tell you, when I found my Benedictine and I noticed the crystallized sugar all around the room, I said, I'm going to like this.

Yeah. I know I had a tough time opening mine. It looked like it was still kind of sealed. I was like, have I even used this stuff? The fuck do i have a new benedictine for would you change anything if you look in the mirror would you change anything i mean you could change a lot but really what you're having here is kind of like a nice rye on the rocks and if you like that you're happy already you know yeah it's tough to change

anything you'd be changing you make a new drink would. Did you guys express your lemon zest? No lemon for me. Oh. Ooh. None. Didn't have it in the pantry. Ah. Yeah, I tried to express, but my lemons were kind of old, so I was like, I was really squeezing

it, and it was like. Little clouds of dust shooting out. Not a lot coming out. I hear that, brother brother you leave it on the counter it's like quivering it's just air coming out of it why did you do that to me of all people me your twist um i would see mike i like the idea of doing this with a scotch damn in fact i might do it for round two. Should we do round two right now?

You know, I think we should. Tim, what do you say? I think that would be fantastic. I love the idea. It's fabulous. Do you guys want to meet up here after the ads? I might stick around and listen to the ads. You guys go ahead.

I'm not going to listen to the ads because I pay for Patreon. I am a Patreon subscriber to the Sloppy Boys blowout. So you're getting all the bonus content. And it's worth every penny. I wish all my friends would do it. Do you listen to questions for Lennon and all this stuff? Of course I do. Of course.

And this week's guest was Neil Campbell. So we're having a fun time with that. Nice. The corrector. Yeah. And also you're probably enjoying, of course you're enjoying ad free episodes love it folks we'll see you back here in a little bit great And we're back with round two. Money Carlo. I did a little scotch.

Go ahead, Tim. You got some. I have to get something off my chest. Uh-oh. I fucked up my first. You know how I've been saying, this isn't sweet at all. I don't taste the medicine. It just tastes like rye.

Yeah. I'm at my fucking Airbnb. I don't even know if you can hear it. My whole family's in the room, like, having a jolly good time. It sounds like fucking Fezzy Wigs over there. What are they doing? They're just, like, kind of partying and having a blast. We did, like, a big kind of buffet pierogi night.

Oh, nice. So when I ducked in there to make my round one they were all timmy why what you did and i'm and i'm saying hey hold on i'm doing my fucking thing and i'm talking to them they're like you're doing the pot i'm like yeah they're doing i'm doing the pot and i had googled half an ounce of benedictine i said how many teaspoons is that and it's three teaspoons i'm an airbnb i didn't have my jiggers yes yeah i'm talking to the fucking family and everything i only pour one teaspoon into my drink the first time instead of three so i walked back in there and my sister's boyfriend is like how you guys

liking that drink on the pod because i just made myself one and i hate it i was like you hate it he's like it's way too sweet and i was like mine's not sweet at all and then it hits me i fucked up so now i have an official correctly made one so to anyone else who thought maybe timmy was a little too has too much of a sweet tooth you don't want people thinking that no this is a of course you want to issue a correction well i want people to think of me as a podcaster i'm kind of like a uh a joe rogan type i'm kind of a masculine guy and i don't want everyone thinking that i drink sweet drinks it's sort of a feminine quality all right well take that sip and report report your feelings entirely different than what i've been having viscous right thicker syrupy yeah i still like

it yeah me too i still think it's delicious but i was fully drinking just a rye on the rocks before you know what get that fucking boyfriend in here he's got some explaining to do i'm yeah i'm gonna let's make an example of this guy yeah i don't feel like this is a sweet drink but but uh like i met i met your sister's boyfriend. I'm not going to call him out on the pod by name because I don't want him to get the hate mail. Don't dox him. Don't dox him. I'm not going to do that, but... You know what, guys? This tastes like a fucking

rusty nail. Remember the scotch with the fucking draboo? Draboo? Yeah. Draboo! Yeah, how could I forget, Tim? That was good. That was good. I mean, a good song will do that to you. Hey, speaking of that, I got the scotch and the Benedictine ready to rock. Right here.

Here we go. Here we go. Different. Scotchier. Oh, I can see. That must be the scotch. That must be the scotch. You know, because I took out the two ounces of the rye and I put in the two ounces of the scotch.

I don't know why I think those are like replaceable. I guess rye is stinky and scotch is stinky and they're both brown. Stanky. I mean, they're both kind of like these like brighter tastes than bourbon, but scotch is a different beast. It is very different. It's like a whole different region. There you go. I mean Scotland, for example.

This definitely doesn't taste French. I mean, it got Frencher as they made it sweeter, but, you know, like it doesn't taste like a French thing to drink to. Yeah. The French Riviera reminds me of like Casablanca, even though that was Morocco, right? Well, interesting, though.

When I said Monaco earlier, Mike thought maybe I said Morocco. Oh, fuck. Well, you know, I have never seen that movie. Blow out. Blow out. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Well, you joke, but it's a great drinking movie. It's a good movie, but it's's got like were you joking mike i didn't joke i'd never seen it i think he was he was a he's coming at you

straight as an arrow serious well the french 75 features heavily in the movie there's a lot of booze in that movie it's a very fun kind of like bar the whole thing takes place at bogeys you know yeah wait wait isn't yeah barely interested this is a good bar movie no i i because i was thinking about isn't who's the actor in bogey yeah that's humphgey. Humphrey Bogart. Humphrey Bogart.

So he's at a place called Bogey's? No, he's at a place called Rick's, but I said Bogey's because when you're at Bogey, you're all... I see. Bogey used to really just... This is the start of a beautiful relationship. That's the Bogey. Bogey's your family.

There you go. That's the fucking movie. Yeah, if you're Bogey's, you're at Bogey's. Bogey's. Sam, I love the song you always play, Sam. Sammy boy, I love ya. Yep. All right.

I guess I don't need to see it. Well. I don't think I'll ever see it. How do you feel? I feel sad that I kind of pulled a Hanford and made the drink wrong, and now I'm going to be the fucking laughingstock of the internet for a week. We're trying to get away from that phrase, but yeah. We're well. What, hanford to the drinker yeah i pulled a hanford i'm uh we're trying to make you know hanford a positive thing yeah you want it to be more like kelpacus

where it's like you could you knocked it out of the park oh man oh i kelpacus what do you mean like hey you just hit a grand slam in game seven in the World Series. Oh, I kelpacased it. You're mad about that? I wish I played for the other team. I'll give you my final thoughts, Jeff, if that's what you're coyly asking for. This is an order again for me. Is it off a classic?

No. But I will do this again. Yep. Is it a classic? No. But I will do this again. Yep. I'm right there with you. You know, not every drink can be a Stone Cold classic. And it's not a strike against. It's mainly because... It's because of the Benedictine.

Which is good, but you're just not going to have that around. You're not going to go to a friend's house and be like, Hey, I got enough to make a Monte Carlo, but it's an order again. I would do this anytime. I'm having an existential crisis. Cause I like this, but I liked it more with less Benedictine,

which means I would rather drink just a rye on the rocks than a fancy cocktail. Here I am a podcaster with a cocktail podcast, realizing all I want to just do is not drink cocktails. Only in this one case, Tim. If I'm hearing you correctly, Tim wants rye on the rocks. Yes. Yes.

Speaking of which, this feels like, I meant to say this earlier, much earlier. This feels like a nice Christmas time drink. Oh, yes. Speaking of Fezzy Wigs and the whole thing. And it also tastes like the drink of the summer. Uh oh. No. I was just seeing how that might go down.

Yeah, it doesn't sound like the drink of the summer. Not as smooth as the last sip of my Monte Cristo. Hey, pour it all into a Topo Chico and that's the drink of the summer. Hey, is it too early to say drink of the summer? Can we call it? Yes. I'm already calling the winter drink.

We're announcing it on Labor Day. Damn. Oh. Oh, my God. You know what that sound means? It means the podcast is over. Hey, no. You do that on the blowout.

I say when this is over. Jeff, you're peaking my friend. You are peaking. Mike would never peak if he were hosting. That's our show. Follow us on social media at the Sloppy Boys where we release these episodes ahead of time. Never gets easy

that way. And check us out on Patreon for that bonus content, the Sloppy Boys blowout where we talk about oh, the best vegetable and just run a mile. We've run a mile that time.

You're not really selling this show. Hey, and you know, sometimes we do a best flower. It's hosted by me and it's a lot of fun. You're not going to get this type of rambly bambly whatever Jeff's up to. What? And he's definitely not going to tell his co-host he's doing bad podcasting. Oh, hey.

Well, there's nothing wrong with doing bad podcasting. That's true. Most podcasts are bad. That's true. I mean, think about it. This might be one. I mean, I'm kind of struggling to think of a good podcast

at the moment. Serial Season 1 was good. Check that out. And if you're done with podcasts, maybe go on over to Hulu, Star's channel and watch Party Down. Now, did they do the comeback yet? Did that happen?

Party Down? Oh, I don't think so. Reunion. All the shows are doing reunions. Yeah. I might do a reunion. Think about it. Friends? Yeah, that's true.

The After Party? Right. That is a reunion. It came from a reunion. The After Party was at a reunion. I'm being a little cheeky A little fun For people who've seen that

I don't get it But Are you So I haven't seen it Just so you know I haven't seen it So like you're not being fun for me Am I still being cheeky?

Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah It's not fun But it's cheeky And luckily I love cheekiness.

That's great. Folks, we're going to get out of here. But why don't we all meet back up here same time next week? That could be awesome for me. Okay. I'll leave you with this. You can be cheeky without being fun, but you can't be fun without being cheeky. Interesting. I'm not sure if that...

I'll leave you with this. Check me out online, at Tim Kelpagus. All the latest comedy stuff is going down. I've seen some of your tweets. They are thinkers. A lot of bangers. Banger-ass tweets.

Viral. I saw you go viral A few times Yeah I've seen it And I'll leave you With this Bye folks Oh right on my head

Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys Give it up for your boys