The Three Questions with Andy Richter - Andy Daly

Episode Date: March 24, 2020

Comedian and actor Andy Daly (Bonanas for Bonanza) talks with Andy Richter about the memorable way he learned to tie his shoes, becoming a property owner, and favorite moments from Crossballs and Review. Plus, Andy shares his thoughts on why there’s no point in making predictions.

Are we ready? I feel ready. All right. What are we doing? It's a podcast called The Three Questions. Oh. You haven't listened to what? To this podcast of mine called The Three Questions.

No, of course I've heard it. Oh, well, all right. I love it. Well, great. Thank you. I like your podcast, too. Thanks, pal. Improvised ones.

Huh? Yeah, you know, I'm too scared to do improv. Hey, wait. When is this going to be heard by people? How should I know? You don't know? Do you know? What?

Next week. Next week. Next week. Wow. Get it hot off the presses. Well, maybe I'll make news then and announce my new podcast. Oh, that's exciting. Do it right now. Shall I do it right now?

Yeah, yeah. This is the show has started. Oh, okay. So you know. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the few questions. Andy Daly is my guest. Oh, hi.

I mean, you knew that because it says it right on the fucking screen. When you push on play, it says Andy Daly is my guest. Oh, hi. I mean, you knew that because it says it right on the fucking screen. When you push on play, it says Andy Daly. Well, sometimes the podcast will just start and you haven't chosen to start it. You know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true. Anyhow. Autoplay.

It happens to me sometimes. Breaking news. My podcast, the Andy Daly Podcast Pilot Project Podcast. Project. Pilot Project Podcast. Project. As you know, there's a character of mine named Dalton Wilcox who has tried his hand at two podcast pilots. And believe it or not, one of them got picked up.

And so we are recording it now. It is called Bananas for Bonanza with Dalton Wilcox. And in each episode, he focuses on one episode of the classic television Western Bonanza. Thank God for MeTV. Is that where you're getting the program? No, they're all on YouTube. I don't know why. Oh, wow.

I wonder every time. I'm just, every episode of Bonanza is on YouTube. Do you watch the MeTV? You know what I'm talking about? I don't know what that is. It is, it's a channel that, what used to be UHF, you know, how, you know, for kids out there, it used to TV used to just be two through. Well, you had 13. You had channel two, four, five, seven, nine, 11 and 13.

Yeah. I think 13 ended up being like that was less. And that was VHF. That's very high frequency. Well, for me, 13 was PBS. And then you had a separate dial for the UHF channels. That's what I'm saying. That beyond 13, it had a separate dial, which was UHF, which was your shitty channels.

That was like somehow like 100 channels, but you could only clearly tune in about five of them. Right. Exactly. You had to like move the clearly tune in about five. Right. Exactly. You had to like move the actual antenna to get them. Yeah. But that was like, that's where they would show the reruns of the Brady Bunch, you know, eight times a day. And it was all re old reruns and old movies.

And that's where you're kind of creature feature stuff. Yeah. So me TV, I think it's like channel 20 here on, you know, on, if you were had a regular TV, it'd be on channel 20 and it is just old TV. Wow. It's just Columbo's and Kojic's and MASH's and, uh, uh, my mother, the car and fucking, uh, dragnet just like, and it. And it is such like a palliative

to just feel like, oh, this is, yeah, I'm just going to watch this episode of Canon about an obese private detective. Or Barnaby fucking Jones or whatever.

All these really old shows. Love Boat, you know, Charlie's Angels, Wonder Woman, like all, you know, like the Linda Carter Wonder Woman. The Incredible Hulk? The Incredible Hulk is on there sometimes too. But it's just, it's like, I watch it all the time, you know. But I'm sure the commercials are modern commercials, huh? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. If they had the old commercials on there, that would be amazing. It's fantastic because like the Wonder Woman, like I hadn't seen Wonder Woman since I was a child, the Linda Carter woman. And A, Linda Carter has,

I mean, I'm not, you know, she's a buxom beautiful woman. Yes. But beyond that, she has the most winning, charismatic energy. Wow. Yeah, really. I don't think I ever watched Wonder Woman. Yes. But beyond that, she has the most winning, charismatic energy. Wow. Yeah, really.

I don't think I ever watched Wonder Woman. Why isn't she, yeah, I know. I think it was like, it was either for post-pubescent boys or girls,

but I mean, I don't think I was either one of those things at the time. But what's hilarious is that like her main accomplice is Lyle Waggoner oh uh-huh and there was I was watching one episode and they parachuted into like some evil guy's island where he was literally trying to control the weather literally that was their plot point and she they

they parachuted in Lyle Wagner was wearing a sports shirt open at the collar with gold chains, Sands of Belt slacks, and zip-up boots. And she was wearing like a blouse like tied at the center. Oh, she's trying to blend in or something? No, no. She's not going undercover? They looked like they were going to lunch. And she had high heels on.

She had like heels on and she's parachuting in, in high heels. And not only, they weren't like trying to blend in. It's a military encampment and they were just wearing like casual clothes. Okay. What was Lyle Wagner's job in her world? He was like a secret agent that, you know, facilitated. Because I wondered why he was a famous person though. Because I would see him on Carol Burnett and it would be kind of a thing.

Yeah, and Lyle Wagner. Yeah. I'd be like, what? He just was a handsome sort of utility player here. Uh-huh, uh-huh. And now people – I don't know how – a lot of people know this, but now virtually every rental – Trailer. Trailer in town is his.

Yeah. I think about whenever I'm in one of those Verde trailers, which are the nice ones. Yeah, yeah. I am thinking like, I don't know if this is Lyle. I think this is I'm in one of those Verde trailers, which are the nice ones. Yeah. Yeah. I am thinking like, I don't know if this is Lyle. I think this is Lyle's competition and I feel bad. I have no idea if he's still with us.

Yeah. The, the, the life of living in a trailer. I mean, it's really fun, but there is, boy,

they certainly run the gamut. They're very heavy on the Southwest motif. Yeah, that's for sure. Really? Yeah. Bones of steers and whatnot. Yeah, yeah, a lot of cow skull art and sort of, you know, Navajo print.

My big beef with trailers is I want someplace to sit and eat my breakfast where I don't have to stare at myself in a mirror. Oh. That's all I want out of a trailer. Right, right, right. Someplace to sit with a table that's not right at myself in a mirror. Oh. That's all I want out of a trailer. Right, right, right. Some place to sit with a table that's not right in front of a mirror. You could request that they like spray painted black or tape up things. I'm like one big gig away from being able to say something like that. And have been for 20 years.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. When I was on the show Quintuplets, I was in a trailer. And it was a two-banger, as they call it. It was halved. And on the other half was Rebecca Kreskoff, my TV wife. And mine, the roof of her, the ceiling of it, was covered in black mold. Oh, that's not good.

Yeah. And I kept saying, because, you know, I'm not a – I mean, now I would say something. But at the time, I'd say, like, the Teamsters – because it's Teamsters that are in charge. Yeah, Chris Bowe. I'd say, like, there's a lot of mold on the ceiling of my trailer. And they'd be like, all right, we'll look at it. And then nothing happened and nothing happened. And about four weeks in, like, one of the production managers had something she wanted to ask me. And she stepped into my trailer.

She knocked and I said, yeah, come in. She stepped in and she went, oh, my God. The ceiling of this trailer. It's pulsating. She's like, oh, my God. And I was like, yeah, I've been saying stuff. And she's like, this just can't be. Like the next day there was a brand new one because it's like a grown-up saw it.

Right. You know. Someone who has respect for you, unlike yourself. Yeah. Yeah. I had another trailer on another show that literally smelled like shit. Oh, yeah. Smelled like someone just had just freshly dumped in there constantly.

And I would tell the Transpo guys and they'd go, okay, we'll check it out. And then they'd say, we took care of it. And I'd go back and what they had done is taken a can of raspberry scented air freshener. Just emptied it. And just emptied it. So it smelled like shit with like raspberry syrup on it. And that ended up being like the entire plumbing system was full of rot and mold on that one. So, yeah.

Yeah. That's rough. Any one. So, yeah. Yeah. That's rough. Anyhow. Oh, well. Where are you from? Huh? You and I have known each other for a million years. And I haven't buttered you up yet.

But you're one of my favorite people on earth. Oh, my God. And that's not just because you're a brilliantly funny person, but you're also one of the most genuinely kind and moral people that I know, which is why it's all the more striking that most of your characters are just fucking creeps. Yeah. Angry, pervert creeps. Yeah. Horrifying monsters. How does that happen?

Yeah. I mean, when you started coming up with pervert creeps, were you aware of like, oh, this might be some off gassing? No. No. No. I don't think so. I mean, but it might be. Yeah. But I think,

I think it began from understanding that when I take the stage, I look like Howdy Doody. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. And then realizing that it would be fun. To be gross. Yeah, to start out that way and

then to surprise the audience by taking a turn into something dark or disgusting or disturbing or whatever. And I just really have always enjoyed playing with that. But then, you know, I have since come to understand that like narcissism is a real topic for me. Like it's really, I'm very, very interested in narcissism and you know, Meryl Marco, uh, has written a lot about narcissism and she has really, um, pointed out that some of our favorite comic characters are narcissists. Like, like every Bill Murray character, Every Bill Murray character is a fucking prick. Yeah. I mean, every sitcom has, you know, like obviously George Costanza is a perfect example of like a total narcissist, right?

Yeah, yeah. And so she has, I think it's a web, I don't know if she's still doing it, but called Narcissists Say the Darnedest Things, where people can kind of send in things that narcissists have said to them that are so ridiculous, but they truly mean it. And it's something that a character would say in a comedy. Yeah, yeah. And yeah. So anyway, that all sort of got me thinking about the inherent hilariousness of people who are just into their own thing and have been so unwilling to see other people that they have become delusional, you know, which I think happens. And we see it with the world. Yeah, there's no truth other than just what makes him feel good. Yeah.

You remember that book, The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen? Yes, yes. Never read it. Oh, okay. I've got a very bad thing with attention span and reading. Me too. Yeah, yeah. Big time.

But every once in a while, I'll power through a book. Good for you. This was a long time ago. I read that book and there's a line in there. One of the characters says something about, I forget all the context, but that his parents brought him into the world without asking his opinion, which that really struck a chord with me. And I really do think that like for our own purposes, my wife and I created these two people and brought them into this place. And like I owe them an apology for that. You know what I mean? But it's not that bad. It's not that bad. Yeah, Glendale's all right. party, I think I had better accommodate you to some extent. You know what I mean? Yes. Yes. And I don't understand that. I don't think that that was the, the sensibility that

my parents had who were just like, you know, we're creating a family and the family is doing this. And we go to church on Sundays and you play baseball on Saturday. This is what we're doing. And you got to get with it. And, and what, you know, I use you, you can't tie your shoes, uh, figure it out. You know what I mean? Stuff like that. As opposed to like, if one of my kids is really late to learn how – I didn't learn how to tie my shoes until I was 27. Tell me.

Tell the story about playing basketball. I fucking love the story. I must have told that recently. Yeah, I could not learn. There were two things I could not learn how to do. Tell time and tie my shoes. And both of them were – when I was taught, quote, unquote, to do them, I was too – I wasn't there. I was too – I wasn't ready.

Scattered. Yeah. Yeah. And so – and it was so frustrating to me that I then for a long time said, forget it. I'm not going to try to know how to do that. And so my shoes, I just like asked somebody to double knot them and then slip them on and off all the time for a long time. And then I was – Till like what?

I figured out my own way of tying shoes in probably like late in high school. Wow. Yeah. And it was not until literally I was 27 years old and the woman who is now my wife, we were talking about the fact that like, I never really properly learned how to tie my shoes and she showed me. That is hot.

Oh my God, that is hot. Probably after that, it was just madness. Just all four walls. But yeah, I... Is that why you married her? Just because... I've exposed myself to this woman now. Pretty much.

We need to keep this bond of trust between us. You be quiet. You're sworn to secrecy. I know if we break up, the first thing she's going to tell everybody is, you know, I taught him how to tie his shoes. Oh, my God. And there's Velcro, too.

You can just like sit. That was part. I did the Velcro thing for a little while, but that's. Yeah, exactly. You just feel like a retiree. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. But tell the back of the basketball.

Oh, yeah. So I was on a basketball team. And as a kid, you know, and I wasn't any good. Great. I was like nine or 10. I was at least 10 because we were living in the new house 10 or 11 so and uh yeah and our team did well not no thanks to me but we were you know in the big like final game and this was all the parents came to it this gymnasium was super crowded and my shoe came untied. And I think the ref blew his whistle like, whoa, stop. We got an untied shoe. And the expectation amongst all this hundreds of people watching this is that I'm going to bend down and tie my shoe. But I had to

say to the ref, I don't know. I don't know how to tie my shoe. And right at the center of the court, he had to get down and tie my shoe for me. And it was, yeah, well, I remember that. It was memorable. That is just like, that's like, oh, my God. It just, you know, that's got to be in a movie sometime because, oh, my God, just like, who cannot relate to like, oh, yes, my greatest fear in front of an entire gymnasium. Oh, that's so hilarious. And then telling time, I was a junior in high school

and I wore a digital watch. I asked my parents for a digital watch a long time before that. And I was just like, you know, I have been avoiding looking at clocks. Like truly, I don't look at them. And I was sitting in a classroom and I was bored and I was like, all right, you know what? And it took courage. I remember it taking courage. And I said, I'm going to look at that clock. Every room I'm in all day has a clock on the wall and I'm studiously avoiding looking at it. And I'm going to look at it and figure out what's going on there. And within a minute, you know, it's obvious what's happening on a clock. But it did make me think like, in a way, why teach a young child how to do that at a point when it's challenging to their brain? At some point, they'll look at it and know what it's doing.

Yeah, yeah. I don't know. And also, too, it does like – there's no reason that every clock in the world isn't digital. That's true. There's just no reason. That is true. That's, you know, nowadays. It's just purely aesthetic, that, you know, nowadays. It's just purely aesthetic,

but, you know. Yeah, but anyway, when I think about like my childhood and the fact that I was a kid with those kinds of issues, like, I think I was probably a kid that needed some individualized attention.

Really? Yeah, right? Like, yeah. And plus, I now know that I have ADD. And so I was that all through school. And so- How was homework? Because I couldn't do homework. Yeah. Well, no, I didn't really do homework.

I had, you know, it was a huge, I mean, it being whenever, you know, third, fourth grade or whatever, it would have been third or fourth because the house we lived in. But like my mother set up in our unfinished basement a desk against a cement wall. So there'd be absolutely no distraction. And I'd sit there with just dumb fucking worksheets. At the time I knew like, oh, yeah, this is no big deal. And I just could not do it. I could, I'd go like, okay, I'd work up this nerve.

Like, okay, come on, come on. And I mean, I probably was down there for an hour and a half. But it felt at the time like every night was six hours of just existential struggle of why am I so broken that I can't do this thing? And then I go, come on, you're going to do it. Okay, first question, you know, whatever the fuck it is. And like, okay, do this. And then like, oh my God, I can't do this anymore. Yeah.

I just, it's awful. I can't do it. Yeah. And oh, it was just ridiculous, you know? Me too. But my parents sort of took the opposite approach in a way, which is my dad is a huge TV fan. And so the TV was always on.

And then I was given a TV for my own room. Wow. And a desk to do homework. But it was a little tiny black and white TV. And I would just go up there and watch TV all night. And, you know, they were furious about my grades all the time. Yeah, yeah. But at no point did anybody say, we're taking the TV away.

Right, right. Were you flunking or was it Cs and Ds? Yeah, a lot of Cs and Ds. And yeah, sometimes there'd be an F. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, I was just always completely lost in math and science. Just never knew what the hell was going on. And just really late.

And, you know, 100 pages behind in the book that everybody's reading in English and three weeks late with the history paper and all that stuff. I just couldn't – could not. I could not do the things. And were either of your siblings this way? I don't think – maybe. My little brother is eight years younger than me. And so I'm a little – I don't really know quite all the aspects of his experience. But my older brother was on the ball, I think.

Yeah. Got good grades. Yeah. Yeah. He got good grades. Do you think being a middle kid has anything to do with like, you know, like who you are as, you know, kind of a people pleaser, you know what I mean? Oh, yeah.

As someone who aligned yourself with, you know, do you think that that middle child were you, did you serve that sort of like middle child keeping everybody happy role in your house? Yes, for sure. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. And my older brother used to really argue with my parents.

And he used to fight for things which I would then benefit from. You know, like, for instance, when he decided he didn't want to do Sunday school anymore, he laid out the case to my parents and duped it out and argued it and won. And then I, three years younger than him, also no longer had to go to Sunday school anymore. So I got out of it three years earlier than him. Wow. The kind of thing that just like sticks in his craw a little bit even to this day, I think. But I didn't have to ever play that role in the house.

I could just be – I could be Mr. Friendly. Yeah, yeah. But, yeah, it was a big deal to, at the age of eight, go from the baby and the pest and the funny, you know, to now – The darling. To now there's a new baby. Yeah, yeah. And then when you're like – yeah. And then when you're like 14, he's six, and you're like really cute.

Yeah. Yeah. And you're just all misshapen, big ears and big nose and really cute. Yeah. Yeah. And you're just all misshapen, big ears and big nose. Yeah. Yeah, and we had to get rid of our dog when he was born, and we had to move when he was born. Really? Why get rid of the dog?

The dog was a baby biter? Yes, actually. Really? Yes. Oh my goodness. Oh, that dog loves biting babies. The story of this dog, I think this is a very 70s thing. Like we were allergic to a cat. And so my parents decided to get a poodle, right? Like a hair dog.

Right, right. And so my dad went through the classified section of the paper and found somebody who was like getting rid of their poodle. And we went to go pick up this dog. And it was a married couple and their, and their child who was a year or two older than me. And he was not on board with getting rid of the dog at all to the point where he locked himself in the bathroom with the dog whose name was I.W. Harper, the third, which is, but that's, that's a liquor I.W. Harper. It is. Yeah. And, and this is the third dog they named after this liquor, Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess.

Other two just, I don't know what happened to them. So somehow the dad gets the dog out from behind the bathroom door, and we brought it home. And he just, he liked my dad, but didn't like anybody else, and would growl and sort of snap at me anytime I tried to be affectionate. My parents say we had that dog for three years, but we have one photo of it. I can't believe it was three years. But anyway, the day that my dad, the baby is coming and it's clear

that the dog isn't going to bite the baby. And so my dad puts an ad in the classifieds. We're getting rid of this poodle. And some guy shows up to give it to his mother-in-law. And I locked myself in the bathroom with the dog thinking like, well, this is what you do when they come to take your dog away. But my heart wasn't in it.

Yeah, yeah. And my dad was just like, come on. Come on, you know you're not that sad. This is not. Yeah, yeah. Oh. Yeah. That's crazy to me.

Like, yeah, we want a dog. Here's one. Yeah. No, I don't know. No sort of like vetting in any way. Like maybe you should check out if it won't bite your child. I don't know if that was a 70s thing. We'll find a dog in the classified section.

Seems strange to me. Now, as a kid, are you a performer or are you, I mean, does that come out, start to come out? Are you a performer at home? Are you like the funny one? Yeah, I used to put on tap dance shows on the hearth. I was a big Gene Kelly fan. Nice. And yeah, I tried to be.

Real tap shoes or just fake tap shoes? No, I didn't have real tap shoes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then at school, I liked to be funny, and I also really liked to make the teachers laugh. Like that to me was my favorite thing. And so in first grade, this teacher recommended that I take a drama class because I was, you know, I was a ham. And I didn't take that drama class because I imagined myself in wearing tights and singing somehow. And I didn't, I didn't want to do either of those things. Whereas now, try and get you out of the tights and singing somehow. And I didn't want to do either of those things. Whereas now, try and get you out of the tights and stop you from singing.

I think it's because we went to see Peter Pan on Broadway and Sandy Duncan was up there in these tights and singing and stuff. And I was just like, well, I don't want to do that. Not a real man like me. Not a he-man like me. Not a real man like me. Not a he-man like me. But that production of Peter Pan was very memorable to me because Captain Hook, at some point in the show, he's out in front of the curtain with Smee, probably while they're changing over from the nursery to the Neverland. Ship or whatever. And he's given a speech kind of directly to the audience or whatever.

And he says, I'm going to get that Peter Pan. And a little boy in the audience yelled, no, you're not. And he, or no, you won't. And he goes, oh yes, I will. And the place went bananas for this one like little minor unscripted moment. And it was so exciting. And I remember it to this day

of just like, he was so in character. He seemed like he was expecting it. It didn't throw him for one second. It was like an amazing moment. And I later – my mom keeps all the playbills and I saw recently that that was James Hewitt who would go on to replace Hervé Villachez on Fantasy Island and then play Mr. Belvedere. Oh, my goodness. And at the time that he played Captain Hook, he was like Royal Shakespeare Company had an amazing resume at that time. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Anyway, that – yeah. That stuck in my mind. That was your first notion that you wanted to be an improviser. Yeah, I think so actually. Yeah. John Waters says that Captain Hook was his first gay role model. Captain Hook in the Disney movie. Yeah, that's pretty.

Very, very funny James Adomian bit about gay villains. Yes, yes. Oh, my God. Or remember when you and I took our daughters to Disneyland and it was gay day. Yes. And the only characters we saw were all the villains. They brought out all the villains on gay day. Yeah, it was Captain Hook and Ursula. Uh-huh. And the only characters we saw were all the villains. They brought out all the villains on Gay Day. Yeah, it was Captain Hook and Ursula.

Uh-huh. And Maleficent. And Maleficent and the one from Cruella de Vil. Right, right, right. And I was like, this has got to be designed. They know what they're doing. Yeah, they know what they're doing. They know their audience.

And I actually, I said something about it online because we were tweeting about it. Oh, yeah. We were live tweeting. We were live tweeting. Our gay day. Our accidental gay day. Right. Which another thing I loved is about three times moms came up to you about your daughter to say, does she have sunscreen?

Like you stupid gay dad don't know that your fair daughter will roast in the sun. Does she have sunscreen? I am well aware of the problem. Yeah, yeah. She is slathered, ma'am. But I said something about the villains, and there were people that were just absolutely indignant about that. Like, no, they do.

Like, why wouldn't they? Yeah. You know? I don't know. Yeah. Anyhow. Yeah. So know? Right. I don't know. Yeah. Anyhow. Yeah. So were you in plays in school?

Did you start performing like that? I mean, are you? Yeah. There was some play in third grade, and then I was the fire truck and the velveteen rabbit in fifth grade. Right. And I improvised a little bit on the show. Yeah, I did. My one line got a laugh, and then I said something like,

yeah, I made a comment out of character about how funny I thought the line was, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a good one. Yeah, right. Something like that. And then, yeah, and then I was in junior high. I was in the play every year and took a drama class in junior high. I was just kind of always doing that.

Yeah. However, my high school did five plays a year, which is kind of incredible. Jesus Christ. There was a guy from another town who would, this guy named Brian Ashinger, who was like, I mean, 6'5 and obese and just this booming voice. And he taught music at some other school and he would come to our school after school every day and put up five good productions. Wow. And my sophomore year was my first year at high school for stupid reasons.

But they – Public high school? Yeah, public high school. Yeah. And I was in four of the five shows and I was the lead in one. But my grades were so bad that my parents forbade me from doing theater. Oh, wow. After that, they told me I couldn't do it anymore.

And so that's when I started to do – we also had a television production class at my high school. The local cable access was located in the high school. And so there was like – there was a switcher and there were cameras and a makeshift studio. And that's when I started doing that in my afterschool hours, which might, you know, because I was making my own schedule now. It wasn't like I have to be at rehearsal and there's a play that you're going to find out about. It was like acting and writing on the sly. Yeah, yeah.

You know? And you were doing schoolwork. You were working after school on schoolwork. Sure, yes. Yeah, I mean, as far as your parents knew. It's a study group. I know there's a study group, and we work very hard, really getting those grades up there.

I don't know if it'll be reflected in the report card, but we're really working hard. So junior, senior year, no plays at all, just the TV production stuff? Yeah. And was it theatrical stuff, or was it more sort of like, in this morning's, you morning's lunch lady news? There was some of that.

I did a game show that was a total ripoff of Remote Control. Remember Remote Control? Like a comedy game show. And then Andy Blitz and I went to high school together. We both did. Oh, I didn't know that. Oh, you didn't know that? I did not know that.

Andy Blitz and I graduated. Andy Blitz is a comedy writer. He was a Conan writer and has gone on to do lots of different things and worked on- Worked on Review. Review on your show. Yeah. Yeah. He and I were buddies in high school. Very funny guy. Very funny. Oh my God. Yeah. We met in 10th grade and then, and so he and I collaborated

on sketch comedy and made sketch shows. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. On video. That's funny that it was Andy and Andy because the first time I knew you, you were working with Andy Secunda. Right. I know.

How many Andys? And here we are. Mm-hmm. Making podcast magic. The two Andys again. The two Andys again. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm only interested in people named Andy.

I don't have anything in common with people who have weird other names. You're gunning for Samberg now. He will accept me. Yes. So then, so you and Andy are doing that. And do you kind of keep doing that through high school and then out of high school? Yeah. So I had no interest in going to college.

At all? No. But then I read a biography. What were you going to do? I didn't know. I didn't know. I just knew that like I didn't want to be sitting in a classroom anymore because I was not good at that, you know. I didn't know what I was going to do. My parents were adamant that I go to college.

Sure. But I did not – I didn't have any plans or thoughts until I read this biography of David Letterman that said he went to college for television and radio for communications, which I didn't know was a thing. And so I told my parents I could see myself doing that and they were thrilled. And so I ended up going to Ithaca College because it has a television radio program, a good communications program, which I did not get into because my grades weren't good enough. But I was in proximity to that world of, so I did, there was a sketch comedy show at college and I did that. And that's where I met Andy Secunda and John Bowie. Oh, wow. Yeah. He was also on that show. Yeah.

And so you never actually did, what was your major then? My major started off as English and my plan was to transfer into the School of Communications. When you got your grades up? Yeah. Yes. But my first semester grades, I will never forget, my first semester GPA was a 1.48. Oh, my. And so that ended that.

I was never going to be able to transfer into the School of Communications. Oh, gosh. I had taken an acting elective and I really enjoyed it. And so I was just like, well, I guess I'll audition for the theater department. And I did. I got in there. And they don't care about your grades. They didn't care about the grades.

Yeah, yeah. Not at all. Yeah. Yeah. So I graduated. I was in the BFA program for a little while, but I ended up graduating with a BA in drama. Oh, nice. Mm-hmm.

Now, what's the difference between the BFA and the BA? Well, the BFA. There at least. It was. At Ithaca. It was sort of created as kind of an acting studio. It was just basically you were moving into the theater building. You were there all the time.

You were taking scene study classes, and you were helping out on the crew, and you were just fully immersed in that. Yeah, yeah. And that didn't work for me because I had been there a year already making friends in other departments who were – and I wanted to be over at the School of Communications making my sketch show and being in student films. Right. And that's where the funny people were. Yeah, yeah.

The funny people were making movies. Did Joel Kim Booster go to Ithaca? I don't know. making movies. Did Joel Kim Booster go to Ithaca? Do you know? I don't know. Because he has a similar story

that I think in college there was sort of the higher echelon and I think it was a, it doesn't matter. I just, it was causing me deja vu

because I think he had a very similar thing where he was like, yeah, I'd like to be in there. It seems more prestigious, but it doesn't seem as much fun.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that's, I think a lot of comedy people who go to college, like all those people who went to Emerson College and all that stuff, like they studied television, radio, and film. Like the funny – that's where the funny people are. Right, right. Over there. Yeah, yeah.

So that's where I wanted to be. Yeah, I think that – yeah, I went to film school and I probably – it's probably very much the case because I also thought about being in the drama. But it's like, I don't know. And I took a couple of acting classes, maybe only one, maybe a couple of. I'm trying to pad my resume. I think maybe it was just one. And it just seemed so silly and boring and not the kind of stuff I was interested in. And then when I got to film school, I realized,

and I still feel this way, like, I don't, you know, being on stage, it's okay. But what I really want to do is act in television and motion pictures. And that's the kind of acting that, that's the technique I'm interested in learning how to do better. Not on Broadway, you know. Yeah. You know. No, I have no idea. Doing Long Day's Journey into Night or anything.

No, I'd rather like – I don't know. Yeah. I'd rather be on season two of The Outsider. Yeah. And that theater department at Ithaca College is very focused on New York theater as like what we're training you for. Sure. You know, understandably. Yeah. And that theater department at Ithaca College is very focused on New York theater as like what we're training you for, you know, understandably. And I was always just like, well, that's not what I want. What were your folks, what was their attitude as you're going through this? They did not think that I should be an actor. I think they liked the idea of me getting a degree in communications, which would set me up to be like, I don't know, ad sales at a radio station or something like a job. You know what I mean? Working in a newsroom.

Yeah, yeah. But at the point it was, I came home with a 1.48 grade point average. It was like, well, whatever it takes, you know? And so I was just like, well, they'll take me in this program. And so they just said, fine. And then, yeah, they got me a subscription to Backstage as a gift when I graduated college as a kind of a... But my dad also bought me a suit as a ritualistic buying of a suit when you graduate college. I think, yeah, I don't think they particularly wanted me to pursue this. Yeah. And what was your plan? Did you have some kind of game plan? Yes, I had a solid plan. When I was... around about my senior year or so, I kept reading about basically what you were up to in Chicago, right? Like the Annoyance Theater and Too Much Light Makes the Baby Go Blind, you know, and ImprovOlympic.

Like there were articles being written about that kind of improv comedy boom of 1992, 93. And I had read Janet Coleman's book on the Compass Players and Something Wonderful Right Away. And of course, Wired, the John Belushi biography and that section about Second City. And so I had become really steeped in all of that. My plan was to go to move to Chicago and just get fully involved in all of that. But I was in debt. And so I moved into my parents' basement in New

Jersey. And while I was just trying to pay off credit card advances and get enough money to move to Chicago, I got involved in what New York improv scene there was and started doing standup. And then I think kind of stupidly felt at the point at which I had enough money to move that I had put down too many roots in New York already, but I had only been there for like a year and a half meeting people and doing stuff. But I just felt like I can't, I can't at this point in my life and my career pick up and move to another city. Well, it was also kind of starting to percolate there too. In New York, it was, well, it was start.

I mean, that was, I graduated in 93 and UCB didn't come to New York until 96. And so prior to that, it was all short form and like very game show, talk show, sketch comedy. Yeah. But I was doing that and stand up. You know, there was a lot of like, if you get five good minutes, you can get a million dollar development deal type of stuff going on. So I was trying to do that.

But yeah, it was not until the UCB came to town that some things really started to explode. Yeah. Can't you tell my love's a-growing? Now, Beck, like in college while you're doing – like are you like a party guy at all? Or I mean – because you never have been as far as I've known you. Well, I – So I mean in tandem with these bad grades, are you fucking around? Are you just – yeah. Yeah.

I quit drinking in 2001. Prior to that, it was a big part of my life. Oh, really? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I was thinking about this recently in some big, because I was under 21, a lot of the time that I was drinking and it was once you leave the dorm room, it's, it can be difficult to know, like, how am I going to get drunk out in the world, you know? So I had this habit of getting blind drunk in my room before heading out. Before you even go out, yeah. Which is so fucking stupid. And I was blackout drunk, like, every time, every weekend night.

Wow. Because I just obliterated myself before I even left the dorm. Yeah. You know? Uh, so yes, that was part of it. And I mean, are you, how is your romantic life? How is this impacting your romantic life? Are you having girlfriends at all during this time?

No, no, no. Not really. Not until senior year, really. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Because I was so much, I felt like I was so much in the scrum of like, you know, jockeying for friends and for prominence on this sketch comedy show and just like all of that. I was in the world of – Yeah, yeah.

And then being hammered every weekend. Yeah, yeah. being hammered every weekend. Yeah, yeah. That's what I would think. Getting that drunk on a consistent basis doesn't make you a very sparkling conversationalist. No. Yeah.

No. Then, yeah, Collins girls are not really looking to take on that kind of project. But now, now the world's your oyster. When you're making that money to settle down those debts, what kind of job is that? Oh, man. Well, first I waited tables at Bennigan's. Yeah.

In Englewood, New Jersey. Lots of buttons on your, did you have like a vest with- No, this was after buttons. They were trying to be a little classier. Oh, I see. It was khakis and white shirts. Oh, nice. Yes, covered in barbecue sauce.

Of course. White shirts, great idea. I remember I used to have to iron the shirt. And as I was ironing the shirt before my shift, the room just reeked of barbecue sauce. I'm just heating up the barbecue sauce stains on the shirt. That was a terrible job. Yeah. It sounds like a joke, but when I first got there, the orientation from the general manager, he goes – he said to all these kids who were applying to wait tables at Bennigan's.

He goes, my wife left me. I'm not allowed to see my kids. I'm living in an apartment over a laundromat. I got nothing in my life except this Bennigan's, and this is going to be the best Bennigan's in the country. And if you are on board with that, welcome aboard. And if not, get out. Wow. And nobody, nobody cared about making that the best Bennegan's anywhere. Of course not. No. Yeah. Well, I had a man, I waited tables at a restaurant. It was a chain, a Mexican chain called Casa Lupita, which was like a step up from Chi Chi's, which was our other local Mexican chain

and it was the same kind of thing where you'd get these talks about like aren't you serious about making Casa Lupita the best brand it could be and I'm like no I'm 20 years old and I don't give a fuck about any of this I just want the tips

they're not that good and we figured out how to drink beer on the job I don't want any of this. I just want the tips. I'm trying to figure out. They're not that good. Yeah. And we figured out how to drink beer on the job at Bennigan's. You know what I mean? Out of like coffee cups or something? Yeah, coffee cups at this particular station where we could refill out of the keg. And so, yeah, I was mostly hammered. And then I got a job as the box office manager at a little equity theater in Teaneck, New Jersey. Oh.

Which was where I learned that thing that people learn, which is like, oh, it's actually – it's bad to be in proximity to what I want to be doing but not doing what I want to be doing. Yeah. That's not a good feeling. Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. You can only do that for so long.

And how long did you do that? I was there less than a year. I was there probably like nine months. I mean, was it a good living to do that? Yeah, it was actually. Yeah. It was decent money. They paid me too much for what I was doing, which was mostly just sitting alone in a building, fiddling around with tickets, putting tickets in envelopes. It was like not much of a job. Right. Yeah. And were you there for the shows or were you able to go into the city and do your shows? I was always going into the city.

Yeah. I was going into the city every chance I got. I had my dad's old Chevy Celebrity station wagon and would drive it into the city and take improv classes and do whatever. Well, who was teaching improv back then? Well, I got involved with this theater called Chicago City Limits on the Upper East Side. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I remember that. Yeah.

That's where I was doing stuff. involved with this theater called Chicago City Limits on the Upper East Side. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I remember them. Yeah. Yeah. That's where I was doing stuff. Yeah, because that was, they were just sort of like improv Olympic mirror image kind of thing. Yeah. And I made it into their main stage company, which was, we did six shows a week on the Upper East Side and I was paid $200 a week, you know, so I actually was making money doing that. Yeah, yeah.

And then you get paid more for a touring gig and stuff like that. I did that for two years. Oh, wow. Yeah. And did those shows were well attended? Sometimes they were, yeah. I mean, you know, from time to time we'd have to cancel the 1030 show on Friday nights. Sure.

Nobody was there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But sometimes, yeah, they really were. They would bring in groups, you know, because the company had been around since the late 70s. And so they had networks of people. Were there bleed over from Chicago? Were there Chicago people that would come in? No, no, no. The original founders came from Chicago and only one of them was left running the thing and the rest of them were all gone. Oh, no. But I mean, like somebody coming from Chicago and saying, I'm going to move to New York

and, oh, here's something that's similar to what I was doing in Chicago. I don't remember a lot of that actually. Yeah, yeah. It was mostly, yeah, New York. Sean Conroy was involved there. Paul Scheer was involved there as a college student. Yeah. Other folks.

Yeah, yeah. And then the UCB comes around and, um, and I mean, does it kind of explode there? Cause it sure felt like that. Yeah. Yeah. I saw them at Luna lounge and they did a bit that was really funny. You know, at that time me and Andy Secunder were the two Andes and we were trying to do like, we were trying to get into the alternative comedy sketch world. Yeah. I mean, I just had remember seeing the two Andes and because I'm self-involved, I was like, there, that's got to, I got to stop that. But yeah, but that, and that alternative comedy world, it was funny to me because at the time

I had, you know, I had come from Chicago doing stuff in Chicago, but never anything – like, I never made any money at it. I mean, it would be like when we kind of had our own group, we would do – we'd sort of get beer money. Or if we would get a college date, we'd get some money for that, but nothing ever, you know, in any regular way. And it always felt too removed from real show business. Oh, yeah. It was like our little regional, you know, fuck around game. Yeah, you're satisfying yourself entirely, yeah. And then there was this show, The Real Life Brady Bunch.

It went to New York, went to LA. And that's, again, it's removed from real show business, you know, because it's just like, yeah, they're fucking Brady Bunch episodes, you know? Yeah. And they're funny. Yeah, they're funny. But they're also like wildly popular for head-scratching reasons. Like, okay.

Yeah, this is not a commercial move. Yeah. Yeah. And then, and I had done, like, I did a little movie and then I, and I was in Cabin Boy. Yeah. But when I got hired on Conan and came to New York, I was very, I mean, I was on fucking television. Yeah. But I was still like incredibly intimidated by the notion of New York.

Oh. You know, and even kind of, and then there would be sort of, you know, the alternative comedy scene. And I would sort of, and I remember I went once because my ex-wife was reading something at a thing. And John Hodgman, it was the first time I ever met John Hodgman. And he was very nice and very funny. But I went and watched this thing that she did. And I just, it was like this revelation of like,

because I, again, I was very intimidated. I felt like, well, these are all really cool. You're already on Conan at that point? i'm already on fucking television and i'm still insecure i go down and i think like oh this is all these new york people and they're all like you know like they're doing some kind of like real highbrow shit that i probably wouldn't even get and i get there and i realize oh they're just trying to be funny yeah oh fuck right oh my god i know how to do that and it And it was just like such a revelation. And then to have the UCB guys come really was a blessing for me because I had like, I mean, you know, especially early on in the Conan show, there was just no room left for anything else in your life.

Oh, yeah. Very much. I mean, I would come home and and you know, and my wife at the time, I, I, I still feel bad. I just have nothing left for like in terms of like just conversation or, or being alive. It would just be like, I need to zone out. Yeah. And cause it wasn't only that I was working, I was working with like really funny fucking people and like getting like exhausted. My funny was getting exhausted oh absolutely you know what i mean and so i would come home just keeping up conversationally with

a room full of hilarious absolutely and young people who don't know like who don't have any separation between their work identity and their personal identity oh yeah so it's all just like fucking mayhem it's throwing trash cans downstairs. It's, you know, writing, you know, big spurting dicks on the wall, like of the conference room. Hiding sandwiches in the ceiling. Hiding sandwiches in the ceiling. More than sandwiches, like just tons of food up in the ceiling, up in the drop ceiling of the conference room. Just madness. Dumping. We had a five gallon bucket full of little rubber balls, like that you get out of a vending machine. Super balls or whatever. Yeah. A five gallon

bucket of those that we had for a bit for some reason, but it just sat around for a while. And then one night where it was, you know, it was probably about 8.30, 9 o'clock at night. We just dumped them on the sixth Avenue from the ninth floor window. It was the fucking best. We just dumped them on the 6th Avenue from the 9th floor window. It was the fucking best. And it was hilarious. Because we had started during the day just like kind of tossing one down. Because they would bounce and they'd bounce so high. Up to like the 5th floor or something?

Yeah, like somebody would be walking down the street and then a ball would like bounce in front of them. And they'd be like, where the fuck did that come from? But the whole bucket of them was just really. What time was that? Oh, that would be in the middle of the day. That'd be like when the streets are did that come from? But the whole bucket of them was just really. What time was that? Oh, that would be in the middle of the day. That'd be like when the streets are. But when the whole bucket went down. Oh, that was like nine o'clock at night.

Like we wouldn't do that. Like we're not going to do that like at rush hour. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like we really made sure. But some people experienced that. Oh, absolutely. Yes. There were people that were like, and they had, I mean, I guess they could look up and

see us looking at them, but mostly it seemed like nobody knew where this hail. It was probably like the way there's a rain of frogs, but this was super, super bald. Yeah, that would be weird. Yeah, yeah. You would talk about that for the rest of your life? And at a certain point, it would be like, I don't know if this really happened. Yeah. I don't know if this really happened.

Yeah. And then we used to do shit like, you could still smoke cigarettes in that building when we first started working there. And then they shut it down and then people would smoke in my office because I was smoking at the time, which I was not crazy about. This is the smoker's lounge?

Yeah. My office became the smoker's lounge, but it was part of a phenomenon that I never was anxious to change. But that was – but it was a situation that existed that would – worked to my deficit, which was the attitude, Andy won't mind. Uh-huh. You know? And there were so many things that would happen at the show in those days where it's like, well, get Andy in the elaborate fucking uncomfortable costume.

Right. We're not sure when Conan's coming or when the other actor's going to be. Get Andy into that thing. Yeah. He never yells at anybody. We haven't seen him snap yet. He'll be dressed as Imelda Marcos for three hours. He won't say anything because he's nice.

Yeah. At a certain point, you do have to start. Oh, yeah. You have to start he's nice. You know? Yeah. At a certain point you do have to start. Oh yeah. You have to start being a dick. Putting up some limits. A little bit. Yeah. But Tommy Blacho, writer on the show, my friend, we used to do a bit and like people would come into

their room and Tommy would be sitting at the window smoking a cigarette and my bit was like, hey, have you met my new publicist? And he'd go, that's me. And then he would pull open a desk drawer next to me, like my desk drawer, and just take like 50 headshots of me and throw them out the window. Just throw them out the window on the 6th Avenue, fluttering down, 50 of me. Really getting the word out there.

People would see the way people would set stuff out to sell, like books and old purses and stuff. There'd be stacks of my headshots for sale that someone had just gathered up, like, I can sell this. Yeah, some have been run over by taxis, but they're still good. And you started working on the show for know. Yeah, some have been run over by taxis, but they're still good. And you started working on the show for us. Yeah, yeah. How did that start?

My understanding is I went to an audition for the Dana Carvey show. Oh, okay. I auditioned for the Dana Carvey show, and I had a good audition, and I got a callback, which I did not know what the callback was going to be, but it was just me sitting at a table with Dana Carvey and Robert Smigel and Dino and Louis C.K. And Robert and Dino and Louis, for people that don't know, had been working on the Conan show just prior to this. Right. And then they left to do the Dana Carvey show. And it was just, we're just chatting.

And I'm supposed to kind of go into whatever bits or voices or whatever things I can do at this table. And it was really weird. I mean, I know that they were trying to just be like, let's just have a casual hang with these prospective actors. But they're judging you in some way. Yeah, I just wasn't there. I wasn't like in a mental space to feel like, yeah, we're all equals, like creative people. I was 25 or 24 or something like that. Yeah, yeah. So they did not hire me.

Yeah. And this was like an audition to be a cast member. Yeah, to be a cast member on the Dana Carvey Show. And was that ostensibly what it was for? Was that like overt that you knew that? Or did you just think it was a chit chat? No, because I had auditioned. I had put together like five minutes of character bits for an initial audition.

And now this was the callback. So yeah, I thought I was there for an acting job. And I didn't get it. But Smigel, this is just the kind of person that Robert Smigel is. He sort of took note of me and talked me up to other places. And he called Conan Casting. It was just like, you know, we didn't hire this guy for the Dana Carvey show, but he's funny. You should use him.

And so I started getting used in Conan sketches. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So that was huge. It was fun. Yeah. It was really, yeah. Yeah. So that was huge. It was fun, yeah. Yeah. It was really, yeah.

The UCB, those guys, those initial four original members, and then when they opened a theater and it opened it up to you guys, I mean, we really benefited from that because it was, I've talked about it before in here, it was hard to find really, truly funny people. Like funny people in the way that we want them to be funny. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Absolutely. Because that idea of like grounding the things that need to be grounded so that the funny things can be funny was not a new idea, but it was clarified by the UCB guys when they came to town and started talking about truth and comedy and the incongruous element and all that. It was what was happening in the alternative comedy scene. There were so many bits that were a plant in the audience. Like if you went to Rebar before Luna Lounge, you would see like three bits that had plants in the audience. And it was all about like, how much can you fool me into thinking that this breakdown in your bit is actually happening? And so that was that idea of like, I'm really committing to this moment and I'm trying to ground it as best I can. And you needed that. You very often needed that at Conan. And so I'm not

surprised that that world, you know, spawned so many people who could do that. And I did a lot of bits that Glazer wrote. And so many of Glazer's bits are all about just the total deadpan. Yeah, yeah. Commitment to this reality. Yeah. And I had- John Glazer who did Delocate.

What was it? Yeah, Delocated. Delocated, yeah. Yeah. And Glazer loves gear. Yeah, yeah. Very funny guy. That's something about Delocated. Delocated, yeah. Yeah. And Glazer Loves Gear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Very funny guy. That's something about a werewolf.

Yeah. Oh, right. I can't remember. I forget it. Google it, people. Yeah. So funny. And then from there, was MADtv the next thing?

Yeah. What year was that? That was 2000, fall of 2000. Okay. MADtv. And how long had it been on? Did it just start? No, MADtv, I think 2000, fall of 2000. Okay. Mad TV. And how long had it been on? Did it just start?

No, Mad TV, I think premiered in 96. Okay. Or four, maybe 90. Yeah, 94. Yeah. So this was the sixth season. And yeah, that was a weird one. That's what brought you to LA, correct? That's what brought.

Well, no, I had come out to do a pilot season. So 20 years ago today. Oh, wow. I was sitting in a duplex on Glendale Boulevard up the street from the Astro Family Diner wondering why I wasn't getting any auditions. That was my pilot season in LA. Did you take rent out of an apartment? Did you take a lease? I was planning to stay in the guest room of an old high school friend who had apparently not run that by her live-in boyfriend. Oh, boy. And so I arrived. I slept there one night. And the next morning, I hear this knock on the door. And it's him saying, let's go find you an apartment.

Oh, all right. All right. So I ended up like, yeah, signing a year lease. And I only wanted to be there for like two or three months. And I had to buy a refrigerator and a stove. Oh, shit. Furnish it? I was like, what's happening?

It was not the plan. And then I wasn't getting any auditions. Yeah. I would literally like get dressed up in my best clothes and go down to the United Talent Agency and sit in the lobby waiting to see my agent face-to-face because she wasn't returning my calls. Oh, my God. Can you believe that? Don't do that, show business aspirants.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because sometimes they thought I worked there because I was dressed nicely. Right, right. You were dressed too well to be talent. Yes, exactly. Yeah. And when they understood that I was an actor hoping to see my agent, they thought I was crazy. And I was.

Yeah. That was a crazy thing to do. Oh, my God. Yeah. But that was a bad – that was bad. And then – and prior to that, I auditioned for SNL in the summer of 1999. And I really worked hard on my audition for that. I got that good.

And then I auditioned for MADtv. And they were like, yeah, come test for it. We want to hire you. And I didn't want to. I actually said no. I said no like three times. And then I had that miserable pilot season. And then I said, oh yeah, I'll do that. Did you think SNL was a possibility? And is that why you were kind of- I did. Yeah, I did. And how did SNL pan out? Just sort of tumbleweeds or did you hear anything? I did. I got good feedback. I heard that Garth Ansear liked me. I knew Adam McKay a little bit at that time. And he was like, yeah, yeah, I'm hearing good things about you. Don't fret that you haven't heard whether you're hired or not. They haven't decided anything. I was like, I'm in

the mix. But then nothing. Yeah. Then the tumbleweeds. Yeah, yeah. And I was 28 at that time. And my agent told me, if anybody asks, you're 26. I was like, what? Oh, my God. Why? I don't know. And so.

Oh, my God. Like that. But that planted the idea in my mind that like, this is it. This is my shot. You know what I mean? I'm aging out of what they're looking for right now, apparently. Yep. So, so, yeah.

When they didn't hire me, I was like, that's never happening. Is that person still your agent? No. Oh, yeah, yeah. I wouldn't think so. Is that person still an agent? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, God.

So how was it? What was it like? Was it some kind of a culture shock? I mean, you know. Yeah. It was a crazy, that was a crazy time. I still struggle to contextualize it in my life and career, you know, because – Because it does seem different than like – you know, because the things that you've – I mean, aside from review, but, you know, just the things that you've been in, I mean, aside from the

Yogi Bear movie, but, you know, like I just was watching the Eastbound and Down, or the Eastbound and Down pilot. And just like that, you know, to be a part of that, you know, just like there's, you've done some like really, like work that's within your own kind of ethos. You know what I mean? Yes, I have. I've been very lucky to be able to do that. That's correct. And so Mad I mean? Yes, I have. I've been very lucky to be able to do that. That's correct.

And so Mad TV was not quite that. Yeah. And that's why, even though I had no job and no prospects and no plans, I said no to it three times. Yeah, yeah. Because I knew. I watched it and said, I don't know what I would do on that show. I really don't. But they persisted, and I had nothing going on.

But they persisted and I had nothing going on. So, you know, when I took the job, the way the contract was structured, they were offering me four episodes for $28,000 for four episodes, which sounds nice, but it's not television money, people. Wait, 28 grand total? Yes. Oh, wow. 28 for all four references. Yeah, that's, yeah. You know, but I was- And once, and just so people know, once the agent and whoever gets a piece of that, it's very, you know, it's 40 cents on the dollar or something like that.

And by the way, so it's like an agent and a lawyer, both of whom called me and said, we weren't able to nudge them $1. Oh yeah, I've been, yeah. But we still expect to, yeah. Yeah, of course. 15% of the time. Right, right, right.

Okay. But yeah, so I thought I'm just going to go there and I'll collect that money and I'll do these four episodes and I'll get the fuck out of there and go on with the rest of my life. But something happened when I got there, which was like this desire to succeed. And it was partly they were negging me, like that's for sure. Like after pursuing me so hard, they wouldn't give me a date to show up. And then when I got there, the attitude was like, Oh,

did we hire you? Okay. Well, see if you can get on the air, I guess, you know, it was like that. It had the desired effect,

you know, making me like, how do I, fuck me? No, fuck you. I'll show you. I'll smother you with success.

How do I get on the air and make myself useful? And I did that enough in those four episodes that So fuck you. I'll show you. I'll smother you with success. How do I get on the air and make myself useful? And I did that enough in those four episodes that they then picked me up for nine more for the rest of that season as a featured player. And I, again, like hustled to try and get myself on the air. And meanwhile, like I'm not liking it. Yeah. You know, and then they brought me back for a second season, which I think there was a weird thing where some of the more popular cast members were renegotiating their contracts at the point at which my contract came up. So they didn't know who was going to be on the show the next season. Oh, so they just pick you up as a utility player. Exactly.

And then all those people came to terms that it was kind of like it really was genuinely, oh, you're back. Huh. Okay. What are you doing here? Like, what are your kind of, do you have voices or what? It was a lot like that. So that whole second season was just, I got a foot out the door here, clearly. So that was weird.

And I just played a lot of straight man roles, which I enjoyed actually. Like I enjoyed being the grounding element in scenes. Yeah, yeah. I thought it was an interesting challenge. Right. But it's not a way to stand out. Yeah. It's like being the lineman on the football team.

It's just like it's grunt work. I'm going to assume you're right. Yeah. It's all just spinal compression. Just repeated spinal compression. A lot of spinal compression, yes. But there were great people. Rich Tallarico worked there. Tammy Sager worked there.

Michael Coleman was there at the time. Yeah, wow. Some very funny people. God, Mo Collins is so funny. Alex Borstein was there. Yeah, yeah. Oh, my God, yeah. Funny people. And Blaine Capaccio. No, Blaine was gone by the time I got there. Yeah, he's great.

Well, then, when you were out here, because one thing that always struck me about you that I found out years ago, and I think we found, I found this out just walking by it with you, that you like when you first got out here, you bought property. I did. You bought a townhouse. I did. I did. And that like blew my mind, like to have that grown up presence of mind. Yes.

Right. To go from a one point, whatever, a grade point average to being a property owner. Yeah. Well that, I have to credit the woman who is now my wife yet again, because I had- When did you guys start dating? 1998. I was 27. In Chicago? I mean, in New York.

In New York. Yeah. And so we were long distance at that. She was in New York and I was in LA. And I was talking about – I had done a bunch of commercials and I had been on Mad TV now for whatever, 13 episodes. So I had this money and she was like, well, don't throw money away on rent. You might as well park a bunch of that as a down payment. And then the interest is deductible. Like all this stuff I never would have known.

Right, right. Her father was an accountant. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, I bought a condo around the corner from what is now the UCB Theater. And that's why the UCB Theater is there. Because I used to go see shows at that theater, which was the Tamarin Theater. Yeah. Because I would just walk around the corner and see whatever was there.

Yeah. Funny shows. And then when the UCB came to town, they were like, we're looking for a space. And I happened to know that that space was available and that the owners of the theater

wanted to lease it out. And so I was like, well, there's a theater around the corner. Because a crazy- So you're totally seeped in real estate at that time. Well, there was a crazy Greek soap opera star who mounted an extremely expensive production of Hamlet,

taking out billboards all around town, and he refurbished the Tamarin Theater as the whatever it was, the Vittorio Silviano Theater. And Hamlet had one performance enclosed because his Greek accent was so thick, nobody could understand a word he was saying. Oh, my God. That's fantastic. The LA Weekly ran a whole story about this crazy guy.

But so now all of a sudden the theater is empty. He had leased it for a year and then just left town. Oh, really? Yeah. And so I was paying a lot of attention to the space and just saw, oh, the owners of that theater leased it out for a year to this Greek soap opera star. What's that going to be like? And then, oh, that guy has left town. He's been run out of town on a rail.

Did you see the show? Did you see that? No. It was one show. And I walked my dog past it like as the – there were all these champagne bottles. There were like 100 champagne bottles in the lobby. And it was like opening night. And I was like, oh, we're checking that out for sure.

Yeah, yeah. Didn't get our chance. Not to be. Yeah. And you said, oh, we're checking that out for sure. Yeah, yeah. Didn't get our chance. Not to be. Yeah. And you said we, you mean you and your dog. Yes, yes. Me and the dog. Hey, buddy, we're going in there.

Roker. Rabbit. Ooh. Well, so after Mad TV, now, when do you and Carrie, does she move out? Yeah, she came out like toward the end of that disaster season. Toward the end of that, yeah, yeah. When the writing is on the wall.

Yeah. And were you engaged? No, we got engaged about a year after that. About a year after that, yeah. And so what happens after that? Is it just kind of, you know? Yeah, that was a time when I truly was depressed, which is not something that has happened to me very often in my life. But I was out here.

I had committed to this place. I bought this condo. I was done with Mad TV. I did not know. I still had that agent at that time who still didn't want anything to do with me. I didn't know what to do or where to go or anything. anything. And I somehow managed to survive for two years being like, I would audition for the principal role in a commercial and I would get hired for a like background role. It kept happening, but I was getting paid as a principal, but I was in the background of commercial. That happened a

bunch of times. And then- And that was at the time too when that was actually sort of lucrative. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I was doing bits. I was taking all the bits that had been rejected from MADtv and turning them into solo performance pieces and doing them. Were you doing that while you were on MADtv? A little bit. Were you still performing out in the world?

Yeah. A little bit because Matt Besser had come to town and he was given Thursday nights at IO West to program. And so he put together a show. It was me and Patton Oswalt and Brian Posehn and Jerry Miner and Matt Besser and Daniel Schneider and Sean Conroy would come and do new material every week was the idea. Yeah, yeah. So I would just turn a sketch into a monologue. Oh, great. Every Thursday night, which became my album.

But that was your outlet. Yeah, that was my outlet. Yeah, yeah. Which that album, if you guys don't know the album Nine Sweaters, pause this and go listen to it. Because it is truly one of my favorite comedy albums of all time. It's really, really fucking funny. all time it's really really fucking funny and i got and i've got to see you do those bits live too which is sort of like it's sort of like you know the differences in them like there's like i saw you do the the the singing group what is it oh the skip skip skipper skip mccabe and

the skip around yeah i saw you do the skip Around Gang live once, but like that one is the one that I remember more because it was just like it was a different one. It was just really meaner and sicker. Yeah, than even the one that's on the album. Yeah, than the one that's on the album. And oh, my God, it was about as funny as I've ever seen anything. Yeah. Because I remember seeing you around here too like doing stuff at the old Largo on Melrose or I mean on Fairfax.

Yeah. And like I remember one night you did something you came up and you were just a stand-up comedian that never got to anything. Yeah, right.

Was there a name for that? Yeah, I call him Jerry O'Hearn. Jerry O'Hearn. And that's not on the album though. It's on the album as a bonus track but but it was on the comedy death ray album oh okay put it on now because oh my god it's just like like i couldn't believe it because you do absolutely nothing yeah i never say anything fucking screaming it's all stuff like have you been i mean come on the world's crazy and just like like that. Did you see this? This was interesting.

I mean, these people were like, you know, walking around going, hey, what about this? I'm sitting here going, all right, knock it off. You know what? It's just like, what are you talking about? Oh, my God. I fucking howled when I saw that. I was like, oh, my God. I remember that night at Largo.

Never laughed at nothing more than that. Yeah, it went well that night at Largo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's a fun, that's a fun – and that came from a bit that Andy Secunda and I used to do on the subway where I would challenge myself on the ride from like Union Square out to the Lorimer Street stop on the L to talk for as long as I could without ever getting to a point. Yeah, yeah. Just to see if I could. Just to go, I'm just beyond the pale at this point. For someone to say that to me, I mean, here I am going, what is happening?

In that voice. I don't know. Just for fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, so funny. Can't you tell my love's a-growing? So that becomes the album. Yeah.

And then what stops the dry spell? It was, again, Matt Besser. He created the show Crossballs for Comedy Central. Oh, yes. And asked me to be on it. And that was like, what's the way to say it? It just washed away all of the Mad TV self-doubt and the square peg round hole of that because it was – that was a great show because I'm coming on as a character with a ridiculous point of view that I'm trying

to convince a real person that I am an actual person who truly believes this. And so it was just such an exercise in burying your punchlines. Yes, yes. You know what I mean? So it was just such an exercise in burying your punchlines. Yes, yes. You know what I mean? Like not – yeah, not being overtly jokey. Yes.

The last thing you want them to do is say, oh, this is a comedian and this is a bit. Yeah, this is a bit. Yeah. And we had written really, really funny things for me to say, you know, for everybody to say. And so to, to just kind of deliver a punchline in a way that the person would never guess that it was a pre-written jokey punchline was a wonderful, wonderful experience. Yeah. That show, I mean, for people that don't know that show, I don't know if it exists anywhere. I think. Maybe Comedy Central website or something.

I recall Besser put it online somewhere. Maybe it's used to be comedy or YouTube or something. It was meant to be a point counterpoint show with real – there would be one real panelist assuming one view and then a ridiculous character assuming just a ridiculous opposing point. Right. Which it's the – it is the kind of comedy though that makes me so uncomfortable as someone that's so nervous about pranks. Oh, me too. Yeah. Oh, my God. Whenever I prank, I just identify with the prank prank or the pranky, not the pranker.

And it just makes, I feel like, oh, this poor person, they're just living their lives and we're laughing at like how, ah, they don't get it. Like, well, why would they? Yeah. You know? I mean, there was an attempt on that show to bring in people who in one way or another kind of deserved it. They were kind of asking for it. Yeah, yeah.

But I did – I remember the day that we were writing this show and having so much fun, and it suddenly dawned on me, oh, there's also going to be a real person there who's getting screwed over. Yeah, yeah. And I wish that element wasn't here because this is a really funny sketch show without that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and you did – there was an arm, the one thing that stands out to me from that show, aside from how funny

and uncomfortable it was, you know, the two things like both being wonderfully in equal proportion was that you played an old man and I don't think you had any makeup on.

No, I had no makeup. You just had like a bucket hat and bad lighting and a thick pair of glasses. And you played this filthy old man. And I was just amazed. And I was sitting next to an actual old woman who was my wife. And nobody

could believe it. Nobody questioned the fact like, no, that guy's 34 years old. Or 33 years old. That was amazing. I remember he was talking about how senior citizens are better drivers than young people. And one of the lines was, I'm not going to get distracted by seeing a friend on the street because everybody I know is dead. Oh, my God.

That was fantastic. So and then from there, how long until review? A long time. That was fantastic. So, and then from there, how long until Review? A long time. That was 2004. And then the next year I got to do that episode of The Office. And then Sammy Pro, which we did together. Oh, right, right. Which I had so much fun working with you on that.

That was a lot of fun. That was a fun movie. We were, though, stuck for about, what is it, four weeks? Yep. All the basketball scenes were shot in an armory that is on the, like an armory fire department kind of training facility that's right down the hill from Dodger Stadium. And you, Will Arnett, and me were basically background for a month while they did all the basketball scenes. Yes, but the funny thing is that Kent left the mics open. Kent Alterman, yeah.

Kent Alterman, who directed it, for an entire month. And Will and I would just like, I don't know if anybody's listening, but we in character would just fuck around on the mics all the time. And a lot of that is in the movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that was, yeah, because I was the team manager. So I had to sit there like I was the time and a lot of that is in the movie yeah yeah yeah that was yeah because i was the team manager so i had to sit there like i was the timekeeper and there was no mic on me i just i just sat there growing ass pimples because of my polyester pants on the naugahyde chair it was gross yeah that was that was a lot of fun that was that was really like a unique fun time yeah you know yeah had a bear on the set and that bear went on to kill somebody yes i remember oh boy animals people they're the best

and then it was eastbound and down oh right yeah and then you know and movies in there the yogi bear movie yeah yeah i still recommend the yogi Bear movie just because you're so fucking funny in it as like the villain in it. Oh, man. You're the best part of it, you know? Thank you. Well, one of my heroes is Charles Grodin, and I watched all of his villain turns. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't say that I resemble or anything like his performances at all, but that's –

He was inspired by – Yes, yes, yes. Or you stole things from him. Here and there, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Right, exactly. resemble or anything like this performances at all but i that's i he was inspired by yes yes or you stole things from him here and there yeah yeah right exactly he's so good and heaven can wait people should check that out yeah if you haven't seen heaven can wait good lord he's so funny that he really is um yeah and then review really came around in like 20 2010 11 yeah yeah it's kind of was the beginning of that. And it was an Australian show. Yes. It was an Australian show.

And, and for me just on my doorstep, there were some DVDs of this Australian show with no explanation from my agency. And I popped them in and watch them. I was like, oh yeah, I could do that. What that guy's doing. I could be, I could be that guy. Is that what this is about?

Yeah. And the concept of the show for people who haven't seen it, which you should also, it's on DVD. Oh, yes. It just came out on DVD. It's on DVD. It only took me four years

to get it out on DVD. Wow. Yeah. Hard work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to put out a coffee table book of all the emails

that I've sent or received on the subject of getting this DVD out over four years as I was passed from one team to another. It was like, oh, Viacom has shuffled those people

out of the organization that you've been talking to. Yeah, you're now dealing with Kraft Foods. So, but explain the concept of that show. So, it is a reviewer who doesn't review foods, books, or movies. He reviews life experiences. And so, the audience, and it's all scripted comedy, the audience members write in and say, what's it like to get struck by lightning? What's it like to divorce your wife? What's it like, you know, whatever. And he just, with the integrity of a scientist, heads out into the world to do these things. No regard for the impact that these things will have on his own life or the life of others in his world. And also no regard for the fact that this is a completely unscientific and worthless exercise that never dawns on him. Right, right, right.

That it's, yeah, because, and like, because it does, and it elevates and elevates and elevates, and it does a really nice job of being episodic and serial at the same time, where there is, like you watch any one episode and there is just like enough of that concept that's kind of fun but then there is like like when it's like what's it like to get a divorce and there's that and it was what episode is that like three three and then you realize like oh no this is this is not like just some sort of lark that this show is doing like no this guy is really going to divorce his wife and leave his wife and child. And, and it just was, it just gets really fucking serious and crazy.

Yeah. I mean, I knew when I first saw the show, I was like, well, that's, what's going to be funny about it is if like, he's doing these life experiences and it doesn't reset like a cartoon, it's cumulative. These things happen in his life. If he gets a tattoo, we'll see it the rest of the series. And I knew that we wanted him to divorce his wife largely so that he could have adventures in the world that a married man wouldn't was kind of the original thought. And the Australians did it too. But it was Jeff Blitz, Andy Blitz's older brother, the Emmy-winning director and Oscar-nominated director who helped run the show with me, who was really like him divorcing his wife is only going to be funny if we really, really feel that he would never do it except for the show. That he – this is the love of his life and he's only divorcing her because of this stupid television show. And if that is true, then in the next episode,

he would still be trying to get her back. You know what I mean? And that that would never end. And so it became – I didn't realize I was getting myself into this, like, demented love story. I never expected – I thought, you know, get rid of the wife in episode three so we can go to orgies. But it's true that, like, from here onies but but it's true that like from here on

out if it's true that he only divorced her for the show and would love to get back together with her then that's going to inform everything going forward and it just made the show like so tragic yeah and so heavy yeah and so fun because he's so committed to this stupid stupid idea of what he's is you know his raison d'etre is, you know? Yeah. Oh, and I remember, too, somebody – because I really love the show, but I didn't – I just kind of was enjoying it on the face value of it being a comedy about an idiot. Uh-huh, yeah. And a narcissist.

And a narcissist. But that was – but then there was a review of – Review. That I think you put online where somebody mentioned that like this show is about white male privilege. This show is about how far up their own asses white men live that they think that their particular – whatever their particular goal is. Yes. Or whatever their particular crusade is, is so important, and it's not. And they are willing to burn down the world for this.

Yeah, we always said that Forrest McNeil, the character in review, had no doubt that he had – the term we always used was unique insights. Yes. He was possessed of unique insights into the human experience, despite having no relevant background or education or, you know, no, there's no evidence that he has any special ability to do this. It's just something he believes. And on the strength of that belief, everything can burn down. Yeah. Yeah. You know. And it does.

It does. Yeah. I mean, like he kills his father-in-law or his father-in-law. Oh, like, he kills his father-in-law? Oh, yes, he kills his father-in-law. Just fucking awesome. In space. So awesome. That is one of the funniest fucking psych gags I've ever seen.

Do you know, I'll tell you what that was based on. I think it's okay to reveal this. Jeff Blitz, it was Steve Carell took his family on a helicopter tour of the Grand Canyon. You know, you can do that. You can get in a helicopter. Yeah, sure. And the company that did the tour then gave them a DVD when it's over, which is – it cuts just sort of automatically like on a timer between the family in the helicopter looking down and going, wow. And then the view, there's a camera on the underside of the helicopter,

the view of the Grand Canyon. It just goes back and forth and back and forth. And one of Steve Carell's kids was vomiting the entire time. So the video goes from these beautiful, tranquil shots of the Grand Canyon to a kid vomiting and everybody reacting to vomit. And is there a bag? Do you have a bag? I've got wipes.

I think I have wipes in my purse. Chaos of that. And then the beautiful view of I've got wipes. I think I have wipes in my purse and chaos of that. And then the beautiful view, just hilarious. And so when we decided that, uh, yeah, we were going to kill Fred Willard in space, that was the original idea. And I don't even know if we ended up doing that cutting to the beautiful view of earth from orbit and then cutting back into the cabin to see like a corpse floating around zero gravity. Oh, it's so funny. Now, were you aware of like sort of the greater implications of it? Are you at some point do you go, this is about male ego and this is, you know, or are you

just kind of like? I was quite focused on it, on playing his commitment and his narcissism and his blindness and his stupidity. And I was also aware that it was very much a work-life balance story. Yeah. But no, I would say it had to be pointed out to me that it is a story about like, yeah, the mediocrity of – Yeah. Mediocrity and self-delusions and ego of a white male. Yeah, yeah.

Mm-hmm. Yeah, because I think that's – like I asked when he was on the show once, Vince Gilligan, about Breaking Bad. Because you know how Walter White sort of turns into a sociopath. Sure. You know, I mean, and not just, you know, but like you see, like that episode where you see his college friends that went on to have a business and you realize like, oh, he's fucking broken. Like he's, and I asked him, I said, did you set out with that intention? He goes, no, no, that was, we discovered that along the way. And I just kind of, that's like, what's to me about making narrative television like that, that's so exciting is that you, you can just be in this vehicle and trying to just deal with the

truth of this thing. And then you're creating something that is just like its own organic form, growing like, you know, crystals in a cave or something. It is that if this is true, then this is also true. If you're going to say that, then you have to follow it through to this. And in Breaking Bad, like the fact that when they revealed that he could have gotten that money from another source, like that's kind of the moment when me as an audience member, I go, oh, he wants to be doing this. Yeah. He is not. Yeah. He is truly an anti-hero. He is a bad person. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty great. Anyway, check out Breaking Bad. Also available on DVD probably. We're winding up here pretty quick. But I want to talk to you just about fatherhood. Like what, you know, what fatherhood has done for you?

I mean, you know, how you kind of cope with it, how you, you know, I've never really asked anybody that before. Oh. I just, you know, I feel like you're not a very good father. Terrible father. So I want to see just, you know,

I want to poke around in there, see if I can't find any. Yeah. No, fatherhood has been extraordinary to me. It's so funny to me when I think of what I thought fatherhood was going to be when we were thinking of having kids. I truly – I guess I was just in a state of denial. I was kind of like it's not going to change much about my life, what I'm doing with my life, who I am.

This will just be another person in our group and – In our group. Yeah. And if there's like – if there's any needs, I can throw money at it. I can, we can hire a nanny, can't we? And we can just like, you know, just address all of this in a way that my style is not going to be cramped. And then there's a period of realizing, oh no, it's a complete change of every minute of my day. Your old life is over. It is over. Yes. If you do it right.

Yeah. Some people don't, some people do throw money at it and just kind of. Yeah. Like, oh, that, it's like a dog that they kind of regret having. Yeah. And I'm not even fucking exaggerating. That's right. Some of the people that I've known out here, you know.

Yeah. Yeah. Who are unwilling to allow the fact that they've had a child change their lives significantly. Right. Unwilling to allow the fact that they've had a child changed their lives significantly. Right. But it completely changed my life. And there was a period of like, of resenting that, to be honest. Sure.

Followed by a period of just of gradually, not even deciding, but gradually understanding that this is the important thing. This is the important thing. Right, exactly. That is the important thing. This is the important thing. Right, exactly. And now it's like when I think about my career or money, it's entirely about them. Yeah. That's the whole reason I'm leaving the house or staying in the house or doing anything.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is giving – making them happy, making them comfortable, making them love themselves and be prepared to get into the world and and do that and understand themselves and for me to try and understand them as well as i can which is really a lot it's a lot of work to yeah to understand understand a developing person is um it takes a lot of and also because you don't really know like i I told my son, who's my oldest, like everything we go through because he's a college freshman now, we've never – your mom and I have never had a college freshman before. Right. So I don't – and he'll – there will be times when he's called me this year with one problem or another or one sort of stressor of another. And I'm like, what do I do?

I don't know. I gotta just go with my instincts here. And like, and you know, kept done pretty well, but it is like, you are met as a parent with times of like, holy fuck.

I don't know what to say to this kid. I don't know what to do. But I can't let them know. Cause this is my job and i don't want them to know that they're rudderless you know yeah i mean i i i definitely do a lot of like um sympathizing yes with without solving yes that's that's important yeah yeah yeah because you can't you know yeah i don't want to come on like I know things I don't know. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

I also think, too, that like what you said, that that's what it's about. Like having your family and your kids and your life outside of all of this that we just talked about for an hour and a half. That that's the important stuff. That that's the important stuff. And I do think that really coming to terms with that and where you just think what you do with your kids and your life with your family, how important that is, how it's really truly the only important thing. And it makes all this other stuff so silly, all this showbiz stuff, all this Hollywood shit, all this publicity or whatever. Am I going to get this job or where's my career going? It makes it all seem so silly and so like such frippery, you know? And I honestly think that that makes you better at it.

That makes your work better. That if you can honestly think about the nonsense of this business with a healthy perspective on it, you're just going to be better at it. Oh, yeah. You're just going to do better. You're just – people are going to want to see your stuff more, you know, which is – you can't fake it, but, you know, because I do see people who –

a lot of this shit is just too important to them. Yeah. It's like it doesn't fucking matter. Right. I've told people – I mean mean people have told it back to me like people leaving the set and you know after a conan appearance all nervous and worried and i've told and i've told numerous people it doesn't matter yeah it's just a fucking talk show appearance it doesn't matter i've never you know there's no scientific formula that that makes that it's like you're actually affecting anything yeah so you might as well relax and enjoy it you

know like your movie crashed because you weren't that funny on conan right it's like no and none of it matters all that matters is your experience that you had going through it because especially in a show like this that's all people want to see. Yeah. Is somebody really existing and really experiencing something that they're in. And, you know, and like I say, you can't force that. But it is like I was trying to tell people so that they can kind of maybe come around to that notion because it's what makes it best.

Yeah. You know? Yeah. Yeah. what, it's what makes it best. Yeah. You know? Yeah. Yeah. I do think like if, if once you, when you feel like you have your priorities, right, you're, you're not wasting time out of the house. So I'm only doing things that I really love to do or that I got to do for money. Yeah. Yeah. And the guy to do for money is fine too. Great. Yeah. No problem. All right. You know, cause you know, like I'm not, I'm not tearing out chunks of my soul for this.

I'll do you a good job. It's important to me to do a good job. Oh, yeah. I'm not going to sweat it and think, I'm going to make this Bennigan's the best Bennigan's. There's a lot of showbiz versions of somebody going like, this Bennigan's has got to be the best. No, it doesn't.

It'll be fine. People will get their apps. Yeah. You know, don't worry. Well, you know, the second question of this is where are you going? The second question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This was all the first question.

This is the first question. You did fine. Yeah. Oh, that was the first question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Wow. Feels like I had more than one question today.

Where am I going? I don't know. You don't know? No. Is there a dream project you got sitting aside? Yeah. Well, I'm developing right now an animated project that I'm so excited about. Yeah.

And a live action project. But there is one kind of nagging, thing nagging at me. I have a friend who is a visual artist and apparently quite successful in that world. She tells me what she's up to. It sounds fancy. And at some point she said, well, this gallery in Germany is doing a midlife retrospective on me. I was like, oh, no, not midlife. Midcareer.

A midcareer retrospective. I was like, oh, that's – I like that. Yeah, yeah. So it's got me percolating on some kind of a one-man show that's sort of structured. Let us appraise. And that would be like fake autobiographical. It would be about you as a – Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is my mid-career retrospective. That would be good. What an asshole. be good. What an asshole. And it goes back to Charles Grodin in a way, because Charles Grodin did a one-man show just about his adventures in show business that became his memoir, which is

now out of print, but you can find it. It would be so nice if you weren't here. It's really a great book. It's my favorite. I mean, he ended up turning into a fucking nightmare. Yes, and you can see the early signs of that in this memoir for sure. I mean, a lot of stories of times where he just he just was unreasonable. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And proudly unreasonable. these exercises and he would go, why? Yes. Like, why? Why would we do that? What is this doing?

And they would have no answer for him. And then he would refuse to do it. Like, be a tree or whatever fucking bullshit or like, you know, make the noise that anger me. And you just be like, why? I want to learn how to learn lines, you know, tell stories. Well, that's good. Yeah.

Tell stories. Well, that's good. Yeah. I mean, you kind of had a little bit of advice, kind of like what you've learned kind of thing. I mean, we sort of learned that, talked about it with the parenting thing. Uh-huh. But I mean, is there something that you kind of wish you could tell maybe like your younger self? You kind of wish you could tell maybe like a younger, your younger self or, you know, whether and whether it's about this nonsense or whether it's about being a husband or a father or, you know. So many people say this, I guess, but I would definitely tell my younger self to relax. Yeah.

Don't worry so much about the future. Yeah. And, you know, don't try to be guided as much by hopes, more by hopes than by fears, you know. Because when I think of my early days of having no idea what was coming, it was – there was not a lot of, oh, it's going to be great. It's going to be this. There was a lot of, but what if it's this? What if that happens? And running away from frightening things, you know, and it would just be, eh, it was just a lot of wasted time and worry and, you know.

Yeah. I've said about that. I would, I would tell myself, well, like somebody, we did a live version of this show with Rachel Dratch up in San Francisco, and somebody asked us, what would you tell your younger selves? Like my – and I – this is 100% true. It's not just – it's a joke, yeah, but it's also – it's like learn to like cardio more. Just learn to like cardio more. And that's like about as good an advice I could give any young – just if you don't like cardio, learn to like it a little bit. Yeah. Learn to like it yeah yeah learn

to like it a little it'll be worth it um but i also i the other thing that i was like i i because i think back on the younger me like and i was so afraid all the time about what and i don't know what i was afraid of but i don't know if i could go back and not be afraid. Yeah. I think that like that coming to the notion that this fear was silly is only because you experienced the fear. Yes. And that if you were 26 and, you know, in a condo on Glendale Boulevard and being like, it's all going to be fine. Yeah. Right. You're right.

I needed some fear to propel me. You'd be in the same place, you know? I think that just like there's so much ache and misery and kind of, you know, stomach acid needs to be produced in order to get to a place where you know what you're doing. Yes. But maybe here's another way to put it, is that there is no point predicting, you know what I mean? That's another thing. point predicting. You know what I mean? Yeah. That's another thing.

Like, because when I imagine what I thought was going to happen 20 years ago, I would not have imagined that they're, you know,

streaming and, you know, all this, everything that this business is and that you can be working and somewhat recognizable and have a fan base but not be famous.

Like, you know what I mean? Yeah, you can make a living. There's a place for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm. Well, I love you. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah, you can make a living. There's a place for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, I love you.

Oh, I love you. I love you very much. Thank you. And you're one of my favorite people. And thank God you're talented. Because it would be rough for me if I loved you as much as I do, and you weren't talented, and I have to butter you up, and I would feel like such a fucking liar.

But you'd do it. I would. Thank you. I would. No, shit. I, you know, listen. Yeah, I got it. You know, I can't, I can't sit here and, you know, and be like, you're good.

You know, I got it. I got to really butter you up. So anyways, but to plug. Oh yeah. Review on DVD. Yes. Pick that shit up. It's available on Amazon. Amazon. Only. Your new podcast. Review on DVD. Yes. Pick that shit up. It's available on Amazon.

Amazon. Only. Your new podcast. My new podcast, Bananas for Bonanza with Dalton Wilcox, coming eventually. Eventually. I have a new album coming out in May, I think. Oh, sweet. Yes, it's called Four More Sweaters.

Nice. Monsters Take Your Questions. And it's recorded at the UCB Theater where the audience ask my characters questions. Oh, that's fantastic. It's a Q&A. A lot of fun. Yes. And then, but you have existing, do you still have the Cabinet of Curiosities?

Are you still doing that podcast? No, we're going to probably do another season of that, I hope. But currently there are not new episodes of that dropping. All right. Well, they exist. They exist. It's a funny show. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Cabinet of, what is it called? The Great American Cabinet of Curiosities. But that's not, don't look for it like that because it is hilariously misnamed on all platforms. Oh, yeah. It's hard to find on Twitter and Instagram. Yeah.

It's there on Stitcher under that title. Good job. You're a real fucking businessman. All right. Well, thank you so much, Andy. Thank you. And love to you and yours. Like what? And all you folks out there And love to you and yours. Likewise.

And all you folks out there, love to you and yours, too. Aww. Aww. Okay, they're talented, too. Yeah, yeah, no shit. Listen, if you people weren't talented enough to know to listen to this stuff, I don't know what I'd do. Lie. Yeah, lie.

We'll be back next time with more Three Questions. Thanks for listening. Big, big love for you. The Three Questions with Andy Richter is a Team Coco and Earwolf production. It's produced by me, Kevin Bartelt, executive produced by Adam Sachs and Jeff Ross at Team Coco, and Chris Bannon and Colin Anderson at Earwolf. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, associate produced by Jen Samples and Galit Zahayek,

and engineered by Will Becton. And if you haven't already, make sure to rate and review The Three Questions with Andy Richter on Apple Podcasts. This has been a Team Coco production in association with Earwolf.