The Three Questions with Andy Richter - Join the Con-gregation!

Episode Date: October 29, 2020

You know who loves scams? Andy Richter. You know who else loves scams? Laci Mosley—the host of Scam Goddess, the newest podcast to join Team Coco! Scam Goddess is a show dedicated to fraud and all those who practice it. Each week Laci delves into the scammiest scammers in history with incredible guests like Jameela Jamil, Paul Scheer, and yes, even Conan. Team Coco has joined the con-gregation and now you can too. Listen to Laci discuss career conman Jeremy Wilson with the hilarious Nicole Byer. Wanna give Laci a warm welcome? Head on over to Scam Goddess, hit subscribe, rate and review the show!

Hi, it's me, Andy Richter. Do you like scams? Me too! That's why I'm dropping in to tell you about the latest show to join the Team Coco network. It's called Scam Goddess. It's hosted by the very funny Lacey Mosley. Each week, she sits down with a guest to dish about the scammiest scammers in history. Con men, fake heiresses, creepy guys who date you for your credit card. The show is hilarious and strangely educational. So here's a taste of Scam Goddess featuring Lacey and the fantastic Nicole Byer digging into the story of career con man Jeremy Wilson. That's a lot of names.

I hope you can keep them straight and I hope you like it. like it. This is Jeremy Wilson's story a.k.a. Finn a.k.a. Angus Wilson. Okay. Yes. Which he's a bald dude by changing the first name and not the

last name because everybody knows and you can track people by their last name. Right. And also like if you gotta respond to a name then you have to remember that name. So you gotta constantly be be like, oh, I'm Jeremy. I'm Finn. I'm Angus. Also, Angus.

Angus is a nasty ass name. Finn is cute. Right. Finn is like, I would fuck with a Finn. Okay, Finn. Angus, I don't trust Angus. Ever. Well, the story is Finn and Angela.

Okay. So they meet for the first time on OkCupid. They meet up and they have their first date at Steak and Angela. Okay. So they meet for the first time on OkCupid. They meet up and they have their first date at Steak and Shake. Okay. Which is fast food, yes? Yes. Okay. Yeah, that feels...

But she's 19. Okay, that makes sense. Throw that into the list. You don't have no money. You don't got no sense, because bitch, absolutely not. But, so they go to Steak and Shake and they talk he has an irish accent is that sexy have you ever dated a guy with irish accent i've fucked guys with irish accents okay i can't do it i sound like a pirate like that pussy is so good okay your pussy tastes so good it tastes like corned beef and cabbage it's a very bad

Irish accent I think we sound like the pirate from Spongebob yes that's literally what I think Irish people sound like well yeah so he has an Irish accent and the date lasted 16 hours

oh lord that's how you know you're 19 He has an Irish accent. And the date lasted 16 hours. Oh, Lord. That's how you know you're 19. You ain't got nowhere to be. 16 hours? You don't have a job. I don't got 16 hours for nobody. You don't have to go back to school?

Could a man talk for 16 hours? Absolutely. That's very true. That is absolutely true. Absolutely. And with no pauses, interruptions, or breaks. I hope at least she got another steak and shake meal

I hope that he went back to the counter got my bitch some fries 16 hours you gotta get me dinner and breakfast yeah come on now we need meals in between

so then she says we had sex of course your young ass had sex with him he took you to a damn steak and shake also 16 hours

yes you have to fuck in those 16 hours definitely at least get something out of this. You know what I mean? You had a steak and a shake and then you got a little. He gave you his steak. She said it was her first time doing BDSM.

So they really. Y'all jumped the gun on this one. So was it 16 hours because he tied her up and left her? Perhaps. I mean, why not? First date, get a little kinky.

The sex was spectacular. That's what she said. She says, the sex was spectacular. Okay. Right. So, at the time,

Finn was couch surfing and staying with a friend who offered him more than just a place to sleep. So, also, you doing BDSM at somebody else's house?

So he like a broke-ass Christian Grey? I would be so upset if someone tied me up and was like, we're going to fuck on this couch. I'd be like, oh, well, this is a little bit more private. Like, I'm very vulnerable. Right. You can't be fucking broke-ass Christian Grey. The whole reason that we was getting our ass beat

by Christian Grey was because he had a yacht and a plane and I saw money yes I'm gonna be tied up on your boat hell yeah put me up on the yacht put on your couch but do not tie me up on the couch do not spank me on your couch I need at least a door right

you know just a door also like a roommate could come home at any time also you couch surfing, the audacity. Oh my God, if I had someone who was staying with me and I came home and they had a woman tied up on the couch and they were like, oh, we're going to fuck. Is that okay? I'd be like, you can get the fuck out of my house. Immediately. That's where you could fuck off.

Fuck off. So when Finn applied for a new driver's license he used his host social security number and birth certificate the one that he's staying with on the couch surf right in return finn had agreed to supply the man with a walther handgun so we live in america okay this is in america you can go to walmart and get a gun truly you can go. You can go to Walmart and get a gun. Truly. You can go anywhere. You can go to Dick's Sporting Goods and get a gun. Literally. You can go to McDonald's and probably get a gun.

Probably get a Happy Meal, and instead of a toy, it's a gun. Right. I hate that that's how it is, but, like, why would you give away your identity? Yes. You literally said a gun, just a handgun, is worth more than my person. My life? So this guy's an idiot, whoever this guy is. So this deal falls apart.

He steals the identity and doesn't even give the man the gun. Okay. Finn is greedy. So seeking revenge, Finn's acquaintance calls Angela's family to warn them about his identity and criminal history. So the homeboy calls the house and is like, hey, your daughter been tied up on my couch getting her ass whooped. He unloaded now what is really his real true story. So he was scamming Angela at first. He did say his name was Finn, but he was like,

all right, fuck it, let me tell you the truth, sis, because I'm into you. This is real love that we have. So, okay, my real name is Jeremy Keenan. He was 35, not 24. So he told her on my real name is Jeremy Keenan he was 35 not 24 so he told her on the date

that he was 24 and he was 35 that's disgusting also like bitch that's 11 years you couldn't tell yeah right you couldn't

it wasn't a rank or nothing was he white yes but also I will say this as a kid in high school every movie that we saw

was 35 year olds pretending to be high school year olds and that's why I went to high school thinking everybody movie that we saw was 35-year-olds pretending to be high school-year-olds. Pretending to be 17. And that's why I went to high school thinking everybody's beard was going to connect. And it didn't. And I was mad. You were like, how come everyone has whiskers? Right.

Where's my full beard? I was like, who are all these bird-chested little boys? And where the fuck is R.I.P.? But where the fuck was Heath Ledger? Ain't nobody had no long hair, no jawlines, no nothing. A lot of zits. A lot of badly dressed little skinny scrawny dudes. Right.

So I understand why she might have thought that this 35-year-old was 24 because when I was in high school, you know, I got hoodwinked too. He hadn't gone to MIT. He told her he went to MIT. He'd been in prison, but he'd walked away from a work release program and he walked away so he escaped from jail what do you mean he walked away from a work release program they said alright you can go to work and he said

that don't sound like he was released do it I didn't even catch that till you said it like that don't sound like he was released no I think they let him outside and he was like I'ma to keep going. And then the guards were like, oh, well, he kept walking.

They said it was a work release program. He said, you know what? I'm going to take the release. Yeah, I'm just going to go. But I'm not going to take the work. I'm just... Bye-bye. You just heard host Lacey Mosley and Nicole Byer discussing the career of conman Jeremy Wilson on Scam Goddess, the newest addition to the Team Coco network. Want to hear more? I know you do, because I do.

You can find the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever you're listening to this right now. Thanks, and I'll be back with another episode of The Three Questions very soon. This has been a Team Coco production in association with Earwolf.