The Tim Dillon Show - 174: 174 - Brendan Schaub

Episode Date: November 17, 2019

Live from Dallas, Texas, it's Brendan Schaub joining Tim today. They talk his own path in comedy, Brendan's personal life, the future of social media, the first time he did stand up, and discuss some controversial questions near the end. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi, I'm Timmy the Trash Can, and I love trash. Popcorn boxes, pots, and candy wrappers. Mmm, they all taste so good. Instead of throwing your trash on the floor, won't you please give it to me? Thank you for considering your fellow patrons. Welcome to the Tim Dillon Show, everybody. We are here in Dallas, Texas, and we've got Brendan Schaub coming up. We have a lot of fun talking to him. He was in town doing the Addison Improv. Joe Rogan was in town doing the American Airlines Center in downtown Dallas. And Tony Hinchkov was in town opening for Joe. So we had a lot of West Coast people invading the Dallas-Fort Worth area, the Metroplex, as they call it. You know, Schaub was standing at a really nice hotel right down by where Kennedy, JFK, committed suicide in the middle of the road. So I saw that. They have an ex, nice and fun and real creepy, on the street where he got whacked.

And you know, and then last night, it was at the early show. The early show was real drunk. I mean, they were good. They were decent. They were fun, but they were real drunk. And you get the feeling, I'm like, these motherfuckers would kill Kennedy all over again. They'd kill him again. You just get the vibe that these people would fucking shoot that guy in the head again. That nothing has really changed. Nada. Nothing's really changed. They would just go in. These fuckers would go in and get rid of that guy. ASAP. No questions asked. You get that feeling here. When you walk around Texas, you get the feeling like if there was ever a place for a coup in this country, it's gonna be here. It's gonna be here. And it was. Like if there's ever a place to get rid of the guy that says maybe we should stop, like, you know, lifting fucking uranium from the Amazon.

And maybe the CIA shouldn't be in a fact, though, double government. Like if there was ever a place to shoot that guy in the head in front of his wife, it was. It's here. And you get that by the audiences. You're like, oh, yeah, you guys are. You guys are down. You guys are with it. There will be video for Shab. I know many of you complain about the video. Here's why we don't give a fuck about YouTube anymore. And we're doing YouTube as a way to make the experience better for everybody. We like being on camera. We like the video. But the reality is YouTube is over. It's done. They're taking everybody's money. They're not allowing people to monetize their channels. Guys like David Dobrik who have hundreds of millions of views are talking about that their ad revenue has been fucking cut.

So I have nothing compared to these people. So a lot of the big YouTubers guys like Logan Paul or whatever, they've started podcasts H3H3 because they're smart. They know that the ad revenue is going to be made up for in podcasting. YouTube is fucking done with small creators. They're done. They don't want independent creators. They want. That's why when you go to YouTube and you, you know, YouTube, Jeffrey Epstein, the first five videos are MSNBC, CNN, and they all have 70 or 80,000 views. No one gives a fuck. But all of those corporate companies are now dominating YouTube. Even though, you know, Luke Radowski, who's stuck on Epstein's Island video has close to a million views, which should have more, by the way. But they're not promoting that in the same way that they're promoting the corporate media videos.

And this is just the end of the road. We knew it was going to happen. They can deactivate your channel now. If what you do isn't commercially viable in their new contract when Ben uploads videos, they go, is this suitable for children? And if you say yes and it's not, they can sue you. Obviously nothing we do is suitable for children. Everything is adult comedic, you know, satirical videos and podcasts, none of which are, you know, appropriate for children. But this is what YouTube is now doing. They are getting out of the business of small creators, what essentially built them. And they're getting into the business. I mean, YouTube will be Netflix. You guys can't go on Netflix. Can't go on Netflix and start a channel. And that's going to be what YouTube eventually is. That's just what it is. You know, there was probably some smoke filled room at the Bilderberg conference or the Davos conference where a bunch of guys were like, we've had just about enough of this.

Technology has allowed people to go out there and truly ruffle the feathers of billionaires that haven't had those feathers ruffled for decades. And I think in the beginning they tolerated it and it even helped them because technology was just this way that you could complain about things but not take any action. So it was this simulation, essentially this world that you could kind of just, you know, participate in. But those people, it was like, it was like, great, let them tweet. Let them, let them, you know, talk to each other on Facebook. Let them, let them vent all their grievances online. We're never going to have to do with it. Well then what happened? Online started to get a little too real. You know, people like Donald Trump got elected. Brexit, you know, happened. All of these things that a lot of people, and I'm not saying these are good things or bad things and I'm not saying that the people are all going to make the right choices all the time anyway. But empowering people is not on the agenda of the elites. This is just not part of the thing. They want people to feel empowered and not be empowered. They want you to feel good, but they don't want you to have the power to really do anything. Certainly not upset the world order that they've really created.

So somewhere there was a smoke filled room in Davos and they were going, you know, this has been cute. This has been fun. We've allowed them to have a little bit of fun, but now it's time to rein it in. Now it's time to shut it down. Now it's time to basically hand the internet over to the corporations that we handed television over to, and these fuckers aren't stupid. They know TV's eventually done. So what do you think all these massive media corporations are not going to come in and suck the money out of the internet? Now that's what they're going to do. The internet for a long time was just freewheeling Wild West. You could do what you wanted. You could start a channel. You could go viral. You could get views. You could build an audience. You could monetize it. Goodbye. That is over. They're done with that. And I truly believe we're maybe the last generation of people to find ways. I'm not saying that no one will ever find ways to monetize content again. They will. It's the reality of what it is.

It's human nature. This is where a lot of people are now making a living. But, you know, right now it's going to be tough. So when all you fuckers complain, hey, no video. I want the video. Shut up. You're lucky you get anything. This channel could go goodbye really soon. And by the way, channels with 500,000 subscribers, 1 million subscribers, 10 million, they can be wiped off YouTube. If they're not quote-unquote commercially viable, and if they're not making YouTube enough money. And I think it really goes back to the idea that people in power are not really thrilled with the idea that you can create a channel on YouTube that gets more views than the nightly news. That means that they are losing the power and they're losing control of what you are watching and what you are listening to. That is not in their plan. They do not like that. And I guarantee there was some meeting somewhere on one of these big conferences where they basically said, you know what? This has been a fun little experiment. We've enjoyed this. We've collected a lot of data. We've learned a lot of things.

But now it's time for the adults to re-enter the room and carve up this space. This is just what it is, is what's happening. Right now, the only freedom left is podcasting, which, just like radio, has always been an auditory format where you basically put your words out there for people to listen to. That is probably all that's going to be left. Because once you subscribe to my podcast, for now, by the way, until they find a way to fucking change this. Because Apple already has technology that is transcribing all of the podcasts that are happening and they're going back. They're backlogging and transcribing podcasts that have already happened. Why are they doing that? I don't know. But that's not a great sign. I don't necessarily love that. And I don't know if they're going to say, well, you said these three words and this combination and that means you're out. You're getting a strike, three strikes and you're gone. I don't know. But I will tell you this, as of right now, because all you have to do is hit subscribe on a podcast feed. This is the only thing that they can really take.

And by the way, this is hard to even complain about because if you complain about this stuff, people think you're a Nazi because those are the people that are going to throw the fuck off. So if you complain, if you're like, I got the platform, people are like, well, what are you talking about? What are you talking about on there? It's a hard thing to complain about. It's actually one of those things where if you publicly vent or complain to somebody that you're getting deplatformed off social media, they're like, well, what are you doing talking about the shapes of skulls? What are you using your YouTube channel for? It's like, no, I'm dressing up like Gislaine Maxwell and in and out. I'm dressing up like Megan McCain. But it's still, you know, you're still, you feel weird talking about it because people think you're some lunatic that's trying to start a race war, when in fact you're just fucking making people laugh. But the problem is there's, they don't want to differentiate people that are actually, you know, trying, and I'm sure there are people out there 100% that are using YouTube to recruit people into violent groups and whatever.

And I just, we know that that's happening. But what they're going to do is just get rid of everybody that's even the least bit controversial. That's just what's going to happen. And it's hard to complain about. I mean, I can complain on my show about it, but and I can talk to people that are aware of what's going on about it. But the general public doesn't care. This is my point. The general public doesn't give a fuck. They don't make really money off YouTube. And if you start complaining that you're deplatformed, they think you're crazy and you're doing something wrong. It's just the way it is. They don't care. People love authority. This is what people are into. People are like, well, I'm sure you did something. Like they don't necessarily, they're not siding with you. And I get it because every now and then there are people that shouldn't be on these things doing crazy stuff. You know? But that's the thing. That's the future. The future is going to be, you click subscribe on the podcast, you're subscribed to the podcast. That is great. Until that changes and until they can start fucking with that algorithm and God only knows and I hope they don't.

But that's going to be the last thing that's left pretty much for everybody. YouTube channels are going to appear and disappear at the discretion of YouTube. I don't put a lot of videos on Instagram anymore. People ask me, I just made a fun Disney video, you know, about some psychopath. And by the way, enough with the Disney Plus. Fuck off. Enough. Grow up. How many times you need to watch fucking Captain America over and over again? Grow the fuck up. I understand that it's probably a good service, whatever, especially if you have kids or what not. And you want to introduce them to the, you know, movies that they may not have seen. It's all in your living room. If you're an adult without any children and you're really excited about Disney Plus, you should be in jail.

Okay, enough. My friend Jared Logan is a very funny comedian said once about Disney because it's the first culture you're exposed to. It's not supposed to be the fucking last. It's not supposed to be the last culture you're exposed to. It's the first. You're supposed to use that as a jumping off point to get to other things, to get to other books and films. It's not just supposed to be the Lion King forever and Disney Cruises. People go see the Lion King on Broadway. It's like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Figure it out. But this is what's going to happen. It's all consolidation. All of these major media companies emerging. The era of the independent creator. I'm being a little dramatic now, but I think you might be, you might look back and go,

the era of the independent creator is over where you could use a really a massive following and monetize what you're doing. It doesn't seem to be, you know, it doesn't seem to be a model that is going to last for right now. So all you, you know, and you guys can't really do anything about it and I can't do much about it. You know, the podcast seems to be the last vestige of being able to say what you want, although I'm sure they can take you off Apple Podcast. If they want, they don't seem to be doing that. I have a lot of friends with a lot of wild podcasts and, you know, they don't seem to be doing that as of now. It's all for now. It's all a limited time only. You know, me and Lewis Gomez had a talk and we're like, maybe the final thing is going to actually be the live show. Maybe the reality is just going to be if you want to hear things, you're going to have to go out live. You're going to have to leave your house, buy a ticket, sit in a comedy club or a theater and hear what people say live.

It may literally go back to that. It might just be a big circle that takes you back to live performance because there's just too many hands in the cookie jar if it's not live. There's too many fucking people and corporate power structures that have to get involved between what people are creating and what you're consuming. There's just a lot. So YouTube is pretty much over unless something changes drastically. And by the way, they prevent people, you know, nobody gets a notification when I do a YouTube video. They don't notify. We've got maybe 18 or 20,000 people that are subscribed to the channel. We should have a lot more, but my videos are not appearing in Sugget even though people love them and they're funny. They have a huge amount of engagement. YouTube doesn't even want that anymore. So they're not appearing in suggested videos and nobody's being, a lot of people are not being notified when I post a new video.

So the tools that YouTube has to limit my reach. I mean, they're using, they're certainly not helping me build a fan base on YouTube. They're just not doing it. They have no interest in facilitating. Is this what Gary Vee? Good question. Is it Gary Vaynerchuk? Is that who I pissed off? Did I piss off Gary Vee? Now he's going around all the tech companies. I don't know. I think it's bigger than that. I think they just don't have an interest in independent creators. That's fucking the way it is. I'm very late to the game. I got into mortgages a year before it collapsed. I got into standup comedy late to the game. This is just what I do. As soon as I get involved in something, it's over. They'll probably get rid of podcasts in a year. As soon as I get good at something, it's done. I'm just that guy.

I show up late to the party. All the good shit's already happened. And I'm just there cleaning up the kitchen and watching some girl vomit. That's what it is. So I show up late to the party. So those of you that are like, what the fuck's going on? I know a lot of you don't give a fuck. Like I said, it doesn't affect you in your daily life. You're not making a living live streaming. That's fine. But listen, go subscribe to the YouTube channel for as long as it's around. Stay subscribed to the podcast. I'm hoping to God that the podcast is just the thing that endures. I'm hoping it endures because radio in some form or another has endured. I think podcasting will endure as far as the video content and where that's going to go. That's a great question. I know that some people are just hosting it on their own websites. You know, the future of that, I don't know. Or YouTube might just be a place you could park your content, but very few people are going to see it relative to the amount of people that would have seen it and you're not going to make any fucking money.

That being said, we have a great interview coming up. Brendan Schaub. I spent about an hour with Brendan. He's a really funny guy. You know, people think I hate him for absolutely no reason because I made a joke, which me and him talk about with Lewis, where I call him the greatest comedian in the world, which he's not. That's why it's funny. But I could have said that pretty much about anybody because nobody's the greatest comedian in the world. Comedy is stupid. It's a dumb thing. And all of you that are precious about it, all of you out there that are like comedy snobs, you're even dumber than the people that are doing it because it doesn't matter. It's really dumb. I work my ass off on jokes to have a unique perspective. And the funniest thing I say is that, you know, somebody with a, you know, a T-Mobile phone has AIDS or whatever and the audience goes crazy at that. It doesn't matter. It's irrelevant. And, you know, I love it. Other comedians love it. It's what we've dedicated our lives to. But God does it fucking not matter at all. So anybody out there that's like, you think somebody deserves to be successful, somebody doesn't deserve to be successful, I get it.

I understand you have strong opinions, but also understand that they don't fucking matter. It doesn't really matter what you think you don't care. We're living in the United States of America. We're at the end of the empire. It's all over. All the trends are converging. We're going to be rationing water soon. So think, these are going to be the good times when you guys were discussing which clowns deserve their money and which clowns did it. Which clown should have had more. I get it. I get it out there, but this is going to be the good times. In 30 years, when you walk outside and the sun fries you and your kids are fucking, you know, walking to school and, you know, 109 degree weather and everybody's got to have some fucking weird sun cloak on. And it's like Mad Max. You're going to look at this time and go, you know, that was a really fun time that we had. But I talked to Brendan for about an hour. We go into everything from a lot of the online hate that he gets. We talk about how he started in comedy. We talk about the fact that I'm a better swimmer than him and Rogan and all of those guys. Even though they think they're athletes, I was a great swimmer.

We discussed that. We took him to politics a little bit. We get his feeling on kids playing football, transgender athletes who go through a real lightning round of hot button issues. And I had a lot of great time on that podcast and fight her in the kid. I'll see those guys again soon, hopefully, and hopefully I'll be on your mom's house. We don't know. It's the ban is still in effect, apparently. I missed that Dr. Drew episode and I didn't show up for it. And I was going to be rebooked, but that was a while ago. So still no call from your mom's house. It is pretty, maybe tweet at them and say, you guys should have Tim Dillon on. I don't know. Don't annoy them. Be respectful. But I don't know. I don't know. We're still, we're still going, we're still going strong here with no reach out from the, your mom's house network. They may have no interest in me and that's okay. That's fine. I'm not complaining. It just is what it is because people messaged me and they're like, why are you going on your mom's house? It's like we had an incident. I missed Dr. Drew. I lied about it. There was a photo of me on the beach on Instagram. They all thought it was funny.

Supposedly. Ha, ha, ha. That's what I was told. We don't know. I scheduled to do Dr. Drew again. I said, listen, guys, I'm flying in that day. I don't want to miss the fucking thing again. So can we reschedule for another time? It was like, okay, haven't heard from them since, you know, so, you know, whatever. God love them. God bless them. Maybe I'll do that in the future. But people are emailing, you know, that are fucking messaging me. That's where we're at. We're here with Radio Silence from YMH. Radio Silence from your mom's house network. Radio Silence from Dr. Drew. Maybe, maybe they're mad at me that I said that Drew would tell people heroin was good for them if there was enough money in it, which we know is true. And that's very funny because it's accurate. If there was a heroin lobby that gave Dr. Drew money to go out and tell you that you should, the best thing for your kids to do is shoot him up with dope before you took him to school, he would absolutely sit there and do it. That's just a reality. Okay. I don't even necessarily blame him for that. It is what the fuck it is. Brendan Schaub coming up. Okay, we're good. It's the Tim Dillon Show. Everybody live from Dealey Plaza, Texas with historian Brendan Schaub. You've done a lot of work.

A lot of work. With the Kennedy assassination. Especially here in Dallas. A lot of work. A lot of work. You're down here doing the Addison Improv. Yes, sir. I'm down here doing hyenas in Fort Worth. Rogan's doing the American Airlines Center. Look at us. You know, it's just a lot of West Coast people in Dallas.

The trifecta. The trifecta. Yeah. In Texas. Yeah. It's good. Are you, so you're staying in a hotel that's like literally walking distance from where Kennedy was whacked. Did on purpose. Yeah. Did you? This is my fourth time coming to Addison. I take the tour every year.

Every year you do the JFK tour? Every year we do the government JFK tour. Government. I want that well documented. Yeah. Government tour where they spew the bullshit to us. But I know all, I know all the facts. You know that it's not. I called out to it. It didn't happen. That didn't happen. Everyone calm down. That didn't happen. Really? That did not happen.

So, so you, you go in knowing. I know. You know. I call bullshit. Wrong. Yeah. Shot was over here. There's actually five shots. Right. They say too. There's five. Three missed. One hit in the throat. One hit in the back.

Who's on this tour? Just local tourist. Interesting. Who don't know shit. So I fill them in. What's, this is what's weird. Yeah. It's, so my brother, Derek, my, my feature and then a son, my opener, MC, when we walk

around, I'm like explained like stuff I know, but there's the homeless community around there, all black guys for a reason. Yeah. They come up and they're like, Oh, you don't know shit. You know, and they, it's like their gig here in Dallas. Oh, so they're giving another tour. It's a side tour. Interesting.

Like what really happened. Wow. Like a meth homeless guy. Yeah. It's actually pretty interesting. Perspect. I bet they're, I bet it's more educational than the government shill tour. Correct. Yeah.

You know how in Venice or like Third Street, the bums are like out there, like maybe juggling. Maybe it's the one man band. Yeah. Maybe they're eating glass. Yeah. That's their kind of Third Street. Interesting. Venice is an interesting thing to me because I love Muscle Beach.

Yeah. Because it's a bunch of gay guys who've cured themselves of AIDS by lifting weights. You're right. I mean, it's just dudes that should have died in 93. Look at Arnold. Yeah. And they just somehow pumped themselves free of AIDS. It's impressive.

I mean, it's wild. Another reason to work out. Yeah. Do you have you ever gone down there? I grew up in Venice. You grew up in Venice. Yeah. In the summers, my dad would, my uncle lived there.

So we would meet. My brother got there every summer. So we'd work out. Gold's jam. That's my shit. You were an athlete from the beginning. Uh, yes and no. I mean, yeah.

I mean, I grew up playing sports. In Venice, it was like, we'd go in the summers. Me and my brother just hanging on the boardwalk. We, my dad would give us like our allowance for the week and we'd buy fake Rolexes and we'd collect them. They didn't go back home. We'd sell them to the kids for way more expensive prices. So you were a business guy.

It was a hustle. You were smart from the beginning. Buy the fake Rolexes on the Venice boardwalk. Yeah. Sell them to your friends. How old? Uh, eight, nine. Eight or nine year olds buying fake Rolexes.

Hell yeah. Where was this going? Where is Aurora? Aurora, Colorado. Yeah. Where they had the shooting. All the shooting. Yeah.

And Dan Soder is from there. Yeah. Me and Dan for some same hometown. And you guys played football against each other. Rival high schools. Rival high schools. You guys are better. Of course.

Okay. Clearly. Interesting. Did you know him at all or not really? No, not really. I didn't know him till I started in the comedy scene. Then I was like, what good comics are to Denver? And there's TJ Miller, who's from Denver.

Yeah. And then obviously Dan Soder, the big ones. Yeah. Roseanne. Is Roseanne from there? Sinbad. Okay. Interesting.

That's about it. That's about it. It's a great Denver comedy works. A lot of people say he's the best club in the country. Have you been there? I have, yeah. What do you think? Opened for Soder.

Amazing. Denver for whatever reason, I don't know if it's the altitude or if it's a lack of oxygen or it's just the audiences are great. They think everything's funny. They think everything's funny. You feel like Chappelle when you're out on the stage. It's almost too good. It's almost like the Isis.

Have you done Isis house? Yeah. Where it's like, I'm not this funny. Please don't laugh. Then you go somewhere else. Then you go to a real club and eat shit. That makes sense. That makes sense.

That makes more sense. That's how it works. So as somebody who's an athlete, because I was a swimmer when I was younger and I will still beat you. How competitive. How competitive. I was a third fastest butterfly on Long Island. I'll destroy you.

How old? How old? Hold on. How old? Nine. Nine, Brendan. Eight or nine. Do your contributions of children to sports don't matter?

Really? No, yes. What do you mean no one gives a fuck about you. A lot of people give a fuck. It moves the economy. By the way. If nobody gives a fuck. Otherwise everyone getting mad when they're injected.

Boys will come girls and girls will come boys. It's a big deal. It is a big deal. You were the butterfly? I was a third fastest butterfly on Long Island. Long Island. Was it competitive? It was better than me.

He had a French name. You know that guy that you can't catch? He's always just better? Up here? Something like that. My mother knows his name and he always destroyed me. You know what really killed me about this kid? He never even saw me as competition.

He always just kind of like looked at me and was like, and he was never friendly and whatever. But I was I was third. I think I got to second once, but I never beat him. I wonder what the kid is doing now. I don't know. But it was the Long Beach Tiger Shark swim team. Hell yeah. One of the top swim teams in the country.

My mom was a coach. I was I was. So the idea like people see people like me and you they're like, oh, what do they have in common? Athletics. Number one knew it because I was doing athletic things as a kid. I was a tap dancer. Have you ever tap danced?

No, tough. Tap dances is a skill. I agree. It's athletic. It's super athletic. It's a football. The River Dance. That's crazy.

What's up? That's insane. I know I can't do that. I couldn't do that as a kid though. You childhood actor. Childhood actor. Swimmer. Swimmer tap dancing.

Well, yeah, because they would think that like as a kid actor, they were like, you got to learn how to tap dance. It's kind of demeaning. It's kind of they feel that way about black people too. They're like, you should just tap dance. Just dance. You might just be put in something. You just got to learn how to dance.

Dance to play basketball. You figure it out. You figure it out. Something's going to happen. But I remember and I and I say that because I remembered the best feeling of my life, which I haven't been able to get back to, but it's only been 30 years. The best feeling of my life, not quite 30, was being thrown in a pool Saturday morning that was freezing, swimming for two hours, and then getting out of the pool.

And then my, see, this is what my parents room me that I would go have like McDonald's breakfast. Yeah, because it was like. I know. And that was, we grew up like that. But Michael Phelps eats. He eats garbage. Yeah.

Great swimmer Walter. That was the best feeling that I ever had was working out and being healthy. And obviously I was nine. Like achieving something though, what it was. Well, it was achieving something. It was discipline. Yeah. It was a level.

If it was, I knew no matter what happened, my parents were going to scoop me out of bed and throw me in a pool like four times a week. Yeah, I was the grind. I didn't have a choice. Four times a week. But you have that now, but not as far as athleticism or swimming. You have that now with standup and podcasting. Yeah.

How many sets you do a week? A lot. I mean, I do it. Well, I mean, let's do a lot. A lot. I do as many as you can in LA. It's not as much as New York, but I do a lot and then I podcast a lot and I make content. It's a lot of stuff going on.

So now your energy is into that, which is the discipline for that. It's to me would be harder than most athletics is athletics, whether it's football, MMA, swimming, like there's a blueprint on what you need to do for this. There's not. And also, no one's calling me. Hey, Tim, make sure you do your sets tonight. So your discipline now is in a completely different lane. It was way harder.

A lot of sense. Once you said it's kind of like a chess game where kind of like you have to look at all the pieces and decide like what's going to be, you know, you have to decide what you're going to do. You have to make a decision. I think maybe with athletics, like you said, you're just running an algorithm. Yeah. It's an algorithm that guys who were way more successful before, you can follow that.

We're staying up. There's no, there's no algorithm. There's not. There's this game we plays in saying broad strokes of what you should do. But then okay, get up, you know, but it's like, how much are you writing? How are you writing? How are you writing? How do you get a good joke?

Make it a great joke. How do you respond after you, you know, it doesn't go well, right? Your road shows. It's like a lot. Mark it yourself. Now that the whole marketing, the social media aspect, the podcast, everyone's trying to do. Stand up.

A lot of your friends are also people that are athletic. Really only Joe. I mean, I was going to say Tony's not athletic. I mean, like, like, are you friends with a lot of comics that are somewhat athletic? Not really. I mean, rock. Callan's athletic, especially in 51, but it's not, but like, we don't do anything. I'm trying to, the only people with athletic backgrounds would be Rogan with his taekwondo.

Callan's athletic. When you get into comedy, do you look around at these people and you like these people are animals? What do you mean? You look around at comics and sometimes how crazy they are or the lack of discipline. No, because all my friends are disciplined as fuck. That's the thing. It's like, like in Rogan says all the time, and I don't take offense to it, but it doesn't

make sense to me when people go, Oh, he's bringing an athlete's work ethic over to, yeah, to comedy. It's like, no, it's just a work ethic. It's just a work ethic. He has an insane work. Yeah, they work. He works very hard. Rogan has insane work.

Big Bird, you like. Right. We work. All my, all my like Christ, like all my guys, my friends work their ass off. So it's like, I view it different as like animals. No, like these guys, they're, they're work horses, man. Yeah. What do you think when you look at like what, when you look at great fighters, because you

were in the UFC for how long? Six years. Six years. Are you, you're still friendly with people in that? Yeah. I mean, though, my only really association with it is I do the show on show time called the food truck diaries. Right.

So we booked the fighters, but my show on there now, it's just really, you know, I talk about fighting and fighting culture, but it's more a lifestyle show. I don't have guests on there anymore. I save it for a food truck, but outside that, that one fight show that I do, I follow the sport, but. Did you watch Logan Paul Cassai? I did. Logan Paul's a buddy.

Yeah. Yeah. He's a good dude. I did his podcast. He's like a good, I think people, it's like one of those other things where people for whatever reason don't like him, but if, but why, but why, but why, because he's insanely successful. Yeah.

I know, but he does this. And I get it. That's a bit of a character form. Yeah. People hate Justin Bieber, but why? Yeah. Why? Yeah.

Who gives a fuck? Right. Well, there's a lot of animosity. You have it too. People don't like you. Do you think that's because you got, people feel like your successful comedy and because you come from this other successful thing, they don't feel like you've paid the right kind of dues.

Do you think it's that? Or do you think people are just like, I mean, that it depends like if you're, yeah, I don't know. I think, but anyone, because you're one of the nicest people that I've ever met. Yeah. Like a lot of comedians are not as assholes are ass. I mean, really. I mean, so the reality is, and then I'll see like some of the people, like some of the

hate you get. And I'm like, I don't get it. I guess it's because people are either jealous or people just have a, there's this weird thing with comedy where like people are like, this person deserves success and this one doesn't. But the market, but the market tells you, right? There's a market that it tells you, right, you know, that lets you know what your value is.

So the market decides what your value is. Not these group of haters on the internet. Those guys, those people don't matter. So when it comes to me and hate, it's like, I don't see any of it. I literally, I don't read any comments. I do nothing. Right. So I don't see it, but if people who I look up to where there's comics, other successful

comics aren't upset is what, what I'm doing. Nobody is. No one. No, no. No, it's only people are dissatisfied with their own careers and their own lives who were upset because maybe they think I'm taking spots from them or I'm selling out Addison and they're not, they got to dislike somebody. They have to.

Somebody has to be. But the other thing is too is it's, it's just like, it's just their own insecurities and also it's weird for them because, you know, they might associate me as who knows that made me when I was playing football. So they associate me as a football player. And when I went from football to fighting, they associate me as a football player doing fighting, but then they knew me from fighting. It's weird for them to see me go from that to stand up like, well, that, that's not

fair. This idea that we're, whatever you go into, you kind of figure it out. And there are people that spend their entire lives not figuring things out. You're kind of figuring it out. You are figuring it out. And maybe there's just an animosity that comes from that. Like, I get it. I'm not mad at him.

Right. You know, I don't see it. So I hear about it. And then it's like, as long as, you know, if I show up tonight and there's no one there, then I'm, people also don't understand jokes. Like they don't understand kidding around. Like there's somebody came on the internet and they're like, oh, Tim Dillon hates Brendan

Chubb. Cause I tease Lewis Gomez all the time. I say, I'm now a follower of you and not him because you haven't asked him Martin. Um, and I, and it's, it's literally the funniest thing in the world. And then I go, and I go, cause, cause Lewis is like, you should have never tried keto. You're not an athlete. Shabs are not. Don't take Shabs advice.

Don't take my advice. Cause I used to be fat and Shabs never fat. So it's like, That's fair. He was big, right? I like Lewis. I don't have any qualms. Of course.

But just then I say, I follow Shabs advice. He's the greatest comedian that's ever lived. And no, like people online are like, ha ha, see Tim Dillon hates Brendan Chubb. I'm like, no, it's a joke. You idiot. Saying that any one of us are the greatest comedian that I've ever lived is ridiculous. Ridiculous. That includes anybody right now doing the rena like a hundred percent, a hundred percent.

It's outlandish. But people are like, yeah, it's a war. It's a fight. These people are, they're heavily invested in that idea. That's what they want. But they need that. Yes. They like drama.

And like, yeah. Leah hit me up there today. I was like, Hey, have you heard this? Have you heard that? Uh, apparently you and I hate each other. Yeah. Everybody hates everybody. And Chris was over at my house.

Right. He's crazy. I'm like, I don't see any of it. Right. Yeah. It's what, but people just kind of invent these things. But I think a lot of resentment for some of these people are right. Like I came into the game and I came in in a different route where Brian County's my

best friend. We do a show together. Right. He's a good comedian. Yeah. Then me and him go on the road together. Right. Doing live fire in the kids.

So that was, those were my open mics. These huge. Massive shows. Which is a lot of pleasure. Well, I love about your special. My favorite part of your special is the beginning of your special where you're in a mansion and you're like, the life of a comedian is just wild. You know, he's like, this is the way us comics live.

He's got his own basketball court. He's like, this is just us. And then he's also got like a beautiful kid in a life. I'm like, no, this is not at all anything that comedians are involved in at all. You're like, it's just life of comedian, you know, here in my granite kitchen and my huge house. So people just get heated. They get angry.

But here's the thing. Yeah. A lot of people that they get angry because maybe they're like, oh, he, the only reason he sell, this is my favorite when they go, the only reason he sells tickets because he's in the UFC. Right. No, no, no, no. They don't have any UFC fighter trying to sell tickets at Addison Improv doing is not.

Yeah. It doesn't work like that. No, people like. Or they go, or they go. The only reason he, the only reason he can sell it is because of Joe Rogan. Okay. Fair. How many, how many people has Joe Rogan had on his show?

Yeah. Co-side debt or not. It doesn't work that way. Right. This is my fourth time here. So yeah. Yeah. Absolutely.

So that, that, that kind of a story that they're painting right now, the only reason because he's fit. Well, that works once. Right. He might go to a city and could sell 500 tickets to be like, dude, he was awful. Right. No, I sell out more tickets everywhere I go. Right.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, those people like what you do. Yeah. They like the podcast. They, they, you know, the podcast gets huge numbers. I think that like, I also do, yeah, tons of sets in LA. Of course.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. But that's a funny story because your son goes to like, uh, uh, fancy school, fancy school or do you meet celebrity parents? Yes. Is that weird? Um, do they know who you are? Do you know?

Yeah, like, we know who each other are like, um, I won't say who, I get in trouble if I say who, who was at the school, but it was a guy who has played Batman and my girl goes off. Who, who, who, why do they let skynet? He's like, it's a fucking bum. I go, would you just say, she goes, why would they let this guy in there? I go, that's the greatest living actor alive right now. She was real.

I went, that's Batman, bitch. Yeah. Cause that's Batman. That's Batman. Yeah. Yeah. And then you hit her. But you know, what has to have, what she's Mexican.

Do you, when you're raising a kid and he's going to have a lot of money, it's going to be. Well, no, no, no. Papa's going to have a lot of money. You don't have a lot of money. What are you? He has no money. He's raising a kid in a situation where he, like, how do you prevent that person from

becoming an LA monster, the type of kids that we see on scooters, on Melrose that have YouTube channels that can buy and sell me. Maybe you too. Probably. How do we, how do we, how do you stop a kid like that from becoming a SoundCloud rapper? I know. I know. Yeah.

Little Uzi, Verde or some shit. One of them. Little, whatever it is. I don't want to say any of them because then they're all died. I got in trouble the other week because I said one of them and it was a dead one. I'm sorry. It was a little about people or whatever. I respect them all.

I respect them. I respect the game. I respect the game. Zand follows me on Twitter. Little Zand follows me on Twitter. Shout out to Little Zand Zand. I think you got to make sure he's interested in, he has to have some sort of passion. Right.

Like you can't have just like a weird kid who's just floating and doing drugs. Yeah. Just driving dad's ass to Martin around. Yeah. You can't have that. You can't have it. So hopefully he gets motivated. I don't care what sport he wants to play or he wants to be an actor or whatever, but

he has to have some goal and that's going to keep him, I hope, on path. He's got, yeah. Is being a dad great or is it anxiety producing? Both. Right. Because you're like scared of the world. Right. Like you're just like, oh my God, man.

Right. You got to make sure that, like the way I think about it when you have babysitters, you have things like that. Dude. How do you? I mean, we got a new nanny a year ago when we moved. Right. We were there for four weeks.

Okay. See, that's exactly, that's exactly what you have to do. I was already at the park. Interesting. Interesting. So you're just, you're just spying on this page, keeping an eye on her and making sure that she's legit. She's legit.

If cameras all the house, I'd watch them. I'd lay in bed at night and then watch back what she did with them. Craig. So do you want to have more? I have another one coming into, uh, not this Tuesday, but next Tuesday. Wild. I know another boy. One more.

Yeah. Are you going to just keep going? I'm down. Oh, yeah. She'll keep going. She'll, she'll throw them out. She'll just litter the whole house with them. Good for her.

So this is exciting. Yeah. Do you have a name or no? Uh, yeah, but she doesn't want to announce it. Okay. I don't care, but. Is it a Mexican name? No.

Okay. It'd be cool if it was. I was kind of getting a little excited. Like Marquesha. I thought it was going to be something cool like that. Like what do you think? Yeah. Like, um, what are you thinking?

Like Miguel? What was that Mexican Disney movie? Coco? Yeah. Like something like that. Like Cocoa Shab. Oh, that's fun. They'd be his nickname though.

We just call him little Cocoa. You know, what are you, what is your nationality? What do you think? Shab sounds Jewish, but only because it sounds like an investment bank. Charles Schwab. No. Yeah. Charles Schwab.

Charles Schwab is different. And that's like waspy, I guess. Shab. I don't. Shab sounds. Shab is German. German. It's the Germans.

You're German. It's been a long time was a Shab. Really? Any relation? I don't think so. Okay. I'd have to check the 21 and me. You haven't learned.

How about not? You probably shouldn't. Probably not. So is it old German? German, Italian, and then my mom was born, raised in England. So half English. Oh, wow. Sure.

All over the place. All over, man. And you just have one brother? Yep. Just this one here. Are you still tight with both parents? Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, they live in Denver. So it's tight as you can be living somewhere else. The kiddos. Everything like that. Yeah. Do you feel, do you feel like you'll ever, stand-ups changing so much. It's, it's, do you ever get worried that we're all in a bubble and that, that it's all going to come crashing down and we're all going to have to get, you know.

Never. We'll always be the ones where like, like there's nothing you can do. If you want a network show or something like that, that, you know, that you should be worried about that. If you're in TV, you should be worried. Do you ever think to yourself, what else you could do? You're like a personality. You could do a lot of different things.

Do you ever? No. I don't need to because between the podcasts that I own and then stand up, it's like, can't really take that stuff. And you do crazy merch stuff too. We do merch. Yeah. That's part of like the business.

Would you ever get into the fashion industry or something like that? Cause I could, I could see you having like seven clothing companies. I'd be down for that. Yeah. You're a smart guy. You're always thinking about like, what's, what can I do to make, and there's a lot of it. Well, like, it's like, what can I do but that I'm into that you're into that's fun and

that you can do. Yeah. Do you ever look around at comics and you go, man, that's a talented person, but they just fucking don't all the time. Yeah. Yeah. And here's the thing. And I had this conversation with a mutual friend of mine who's a comic and I went, I

don't, why is he not, he should be fucking Jerry Seinfeld and then we're just, it's, he's just on this loop. Like it's never, it's never going to work. He's been doing the same thing. Like this is just, there's no hope. I'm like, no, I can help him. I'm telling you, you can't help this guy. What do you think it is?

Um, bit of self-sabotage, bit of just like not a risk taker, doesn't want to put in the work, worried about losing, you know, maybe an hour, doesn't want to shoot a special. Do you think that have you been, because I think New York sometimes for whatever reason, can, can people get in their heads about purity, being a purist. And there's only one way to do it and I'm going to do it that way. And sometimes not all of them. There's a lot of, there's amazing people in New York. But like what I like about LA is that there's, there's not really a, a, a line between a

guy like me or a Logan Paul or somebody, you know what I mean? You don't think so? Like in LA, I, I feel like, you know, I, a lot, what, what do you mean by line? Like there's a line that he lives in a mansion that I don't, and then I don't. But the reality is like, he's a guy with an audience. I, I don't feel, I feel great going on his show. I feel great going on a YouTuber's show or social media. Like in New York, there's such this.

The line would be drawn when there's a live perform for, when it takes, when it's time to stand up, the line is not a standup, but in New York, a lot of people are just not enlarging their audiences because they're, it's like a circle jerk. It's almost a, it's the old school mentality. Old school mentality. And I'm like, no, you got to get out there and collaborate with people that are not stand up. But I also, and tell, tell me if I'm wrong.

And I think it's opened up more. I mean, Andrew Schultz, we're talking about this. Yeah. Schultz is led, you know, led the way. Yeah. Where in New York, you guys are very like, huh, like what, that's your bone and you guys, you better fucking fight me for it. Yeah.

LA. It's like, especially in the group I run in, it's more of what, like helping each other when there's a lot more money in LA. So when there's a lot more money, there's not, they're scarcity in New York. So people are fighting with each other more. But it's, but that doesn't make sense. More money in what way? Because you guys, your way ahead with podcasting, you guys made a lot more

money, your shows are a lot bigger. There's, but that's, but that's not because we're in LA. No, it's because you could do it. It's the attitude I would argue that some of that was the, the necessity of innovation, being in LA, not having as many spots, New York City being so focused on stand up. There was a lot of spots, people just working and being so busy. I think LA, there's more downtime and people said, well, what else can we do?

How else, you know, Rogan, you know, starting that whole thing, you know, being, you know, not being at the comedy store as much as the home and see a thing. I think like that innovation, you guys are just way ahead. And there's just a lot more money and also LA is Hollywood and movies and TV. And there's a million other things. And New York does not as many of those things. So New York, you have status and everybody's kind of like, who's high on the totem pole of who, who's a real comic and who does, you know, who was working

to sell her every night and who's doing this and who's doing that. There's nothing wrong with that. But what I think starts to happen to people is they lose sight that there's a larger world out there and they got to reach people. Yeah. And, but, and I think it shows too. Not that, you know, the argument of New York comics brand LA comics, but some of the New York comments who, who will come over like you, Mark Norman,

Schultz, it's like, Jesus Christ. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Monsters. Yeah. I didn't know that which way that was going. You're like, Jesus Christ. He's got, he's a rough hang or this is a rough hair. Terrible to be right.

No, you guys are fucking fantastic at a level because you guys are doing so much comedy and it's just like, holy fuck. Yeah. Well, I think that's, I appreciate that. But I also think, man, that there's, there's a lot of beasts in LA too. It's like, oh, there's a lot of beasts. There's just a lot of beasts. There's people that just do it differently.

You know, there's people that at your age now, do you see, do you look at, are you glad that you waited to get into comedy? Cause are you like, I don't think I'd have a perspective. Yeah. If I would start younger, granted, I wish I had the stage time when I was younger, but it's like, I don't want perspective I'd have. Right. Like now I've gone through some shit, ups and downs, and like,

it gives me more perspective on life. Do you have a life where you feel like there's a lot of drama? There's no drama? Like we are you somebody who's caught? Like, how does my drama comes from outside of that? I don't have drama inside my house. So my kid, my girl, there's no drama. My drama comes from my business partners.

OK, who are other comics, right? OK, and then they're at what is it? Just come to a world crazy in our own way. Everybody wants to do it their way. Yes. Yeah. And you would call it or super tight, but you guys like every now and then, I guess it's very mean count.

Don't don't bump heads. OK, no. Do you and Theo bump heads over not really bump heads? Not really bump heads. No, me and Theo, we're just you're talking about two different kind of personalities where I grew up on team sports and Theo and I grew like to me, it's all about a team aspect and feels learning that, right, if that makes sense. He's more like me, a championship swimmer,

because there's nobody on the starting block, except it's all on you. You understand it's all on me. Like you're you're in a football team hiding with a bunch of other people. Fair, whereas I'm on the block. Get ready to my family's good name. Everything right there just on your shoulders. Did you have my show? Yeah. Did you ever did you ever swim?

Were you ever swimmer? I mean, I I mean, I swam as a kid, but not competitively because I was good at any type of athlete. No, no, nothing. Interesting. Nothing. Does he work out ever? Yeah, he's starting to work out now because they, you know, it makes him feel better. Right. What is the workout?

What is the move? Is it weights? Car is what what is everything, man? Yeah, everything. You have to do it all. You have to do it all. I mean, you don't have to. No, but you should. I mean, but isn't swimming good? Let's say I just started swimming.

Fuck yeah, do it. What if I just started swimming? My grandma, she turns 96. She swam every day to choose 90. See, that's the move. That's the move. She's 300 pounds. Really?

But that's also the move. I think I think those things are both the move. I think you just swam every day and be 300 pounds. I mean, it's like that Gaffigan bit. Have you ever seen the Gaffigan bit about whales? He's like, everyone says swimming's the best exercise. Gaffigan's like, what about whales? He's like, do you think whales think that's my grandma?

She would swim. It's like, I don't know, man. Swimming ain't working, bitch. It just doesn't work. Swimming is using the king size snicker bars at night. Really? She's in Colorado, just living. Fuck yeah, she's out there living.

She's throwing her birthday party this weekend. That's awesome. But that's the thing. I mean, listen, you don't want to be big, but this is what happens sometimes. It's very hard. The problem is, is like, you... It's very difficult.

For what we do, you don't need to be in some phenomenal shape. Really? We don't need to be Joe Rogan. No. No. Like, he's insane. But he's at any human level of discipline

that we all aspire to and respect. But it's very hard to then, like, apply that to your life. You sometimes, I don't want to work out for two hours a day. Yeah, and then sometimes Joe will just be like, just never eat sugar. And I'm like, right, thank you.

He's like, and you're good, right? No more sugar. He's like, just no sugar, no carbs ever for the rest of your life. And I'm like, okay, yeah. Yeah, tell me the story as well. So you're not feeling good. So no more sugar, no more alcohol.

And I went, okay, he's like, so you're good on that. I'm like, we're good, man. Yeah. I mean, it's an insane level of discipline. You know? Why is the country as fat as the country? I mean, the country is, it's a public health crisis. Where everybody's fat.

Everybody's like four or 500 pounds. I mean, not everybody, but you go to middle America. These are big boys. Go to Disneyland. They're like, what's happened? It's bad. What is it? And you're a guy from that world a little bit.

How do you fix it? What world? For the world of somebody who's works out and is, you know. Just people are lazy. So it's like, if you want food, it's like fast foods everywhere. So the government kind of fucks us and just society fucks us. Cause if you want food, it's like the easiest thing to do

is stop at Burger King, something like, like the healthy options are more expensive. If they're harder to get. So it's like already tough to eat healthy. Then there's no healthy options. What do you think about this whole thing about fat shaming and that we're now celebrating fat people? Like, I don't celebrate fat people.

I can't like the models. I don't want my model fat. That's not, that's not what they do. Right. That's a good point. That's not what they do. Now what about Lizzo? Because Lizzo is very, very popular.

But lose weight. Yeah, lose a little. Everyone's like, oh, I like her attitude. Good for her. I'm like, not good for her, but she's unhealthy. But have you seen a new video where she comes out in the diabetic boots? I like that.

The point is she needs to get skinny. She's going to explode on stage and her entrails are going to hit the faces of a bunch of white women. The blood's on our hands because everyone's like, you go fat girl. It's like, I'm the only one going, you don't go fat girl. You need to just take it down a notch. She needs to rain it in.

Maybe I'm not saying get skinny. Yeah. Let's get healthy. She needs to rain it in. I mean, check your blood pressure, bitch. She called out some post-mate because her post-mate was late with her food or something on Twitter.

So that's a problem. That makes sense. It's a problem if you're a multi-millionaire and you're calling out a post-mate on Twitter. She's an addict. It's an addict. It's an addict. Listen, I've been there.

Where's your food of choice? When the post-mate shows up, I want to strangle them. Oh, me too. I go. Do you have other orders? Yeah, I get being angry at a post-mate, but then to call them out on Twitter is like, oh, you're fucking not even in your right mind.

My food of choice. Like what's your go-to? I don't know if I have a go-to, like what's a problem? Like for me, a real, real thing that I should not have is like, maybe I find myself in Larchmont Village. Oh, there's a salt and straw. Oh, there's a scoop of ice cream.

These are bad. This is a problem. But it has to be like really good ice cream for me to go there. Yeah, I don't eat garbage ice cream. No, me neither. Have you been to Jenny's? Yeah, it's fine.

It's nice. It's fine. Salt and straw is the numero uno. Salt and straw is better. The salted malted chocolate cookie dough or whatever. And then I get fudge on top. I mean, this is, and then I walk around Hancock Park.

My mouth is watering, by the way. But so like my ice cream's always been a bad thing. I actually don't eat like bad. Like I don't eat dominant. I don't eat garbage food. But when I go out, I like meatball. No, I eat all that. I'll be in New York.

Well, let's say, let's say, let's say like you get done tonight at Hyena's. Like after we, so after I'm done with you, before, instead of getting stuck in traffic on the way back to Fort Worth, we might go to a steakhouse. And that's not bad. Yeah, you can eat good there.

Sure. But maybe some, maybe the waiter says something about like lobster bisque or something. Gotta have it. Maybe I get a bowl of lobster bisque. See, I grew up going to four-star restaurants. I grew up eating. You grew up rich.

Not rich. No, not rich. My uncle was in the restaurant business. And he had a lot of great restaurants in New York. So we would just, the only luxury I ever had as a kid was food. And that was the only thing that I learned that like high-end stuff,

I could go to really nice restaurants. So I've internalized that. Your palate is high. So my palate is high. When I was eight years old, I was eating a parfait of salmon and tuna tartare with creme fraiche and caviar. And I was like, is this hysteria caviar?

Ugh, you know? I, you know, I'm like, is this Iranian? So it's a problem. And then I got into drugs, 13 to 14, started with a cocaine. 13, hold on. Yeah, 13, first. What are you, McCulley?

13 or 14? I was trying to be, I failed. I know you were. I failed. 13, 14? 13 was the first line of coke. That's some New York shit. Friends backyard, Long Island.

Friends backyard. And you got addicted to it. On the water, of course. And you got addicted to it? No, no. I got addicted when I was like 20, when I was selling subprime mortgages in Long Island. And I was like, this is a great way to just-

Did you run happy? I wasn't thrilled, but I was also like, it's a great way to just be coked up and have a lot of energy and be on the phone and be talking to people and be like, this world of sales guys, it wore suits and, you know, drove Range Rover's and everybody did cocaine. Well, phone wall street, I feel you.

And yeah, that's what this is. It's the wolf, but it's not on wall street. No. Nobody had really- It's a wolf on Long Island. Yeah, but it was like, it was a big issue. I mean, there was a lot of issues. Did you hit rock bottom?

I mean, but it wasn't the rock, like everyone's going to yell at me when I say what rock bottom was. Where was rock bottoms different? Yes. I- As Tamara says, there's always wiggle room for rock bottom. There's always a base.

You know, you go lower. But my rock bottom was I bought a house for $600,000 that I could not afford. But I just bought this big house. And then that was, that started the events in motion for rock bottom. How so? Cause you couldn't afford it and you went bankrupt?

Well, I was just, no. I mean, I was just like drinking every night at a bar up the block from my house. I was doing drugs. It was 2009, the mortgage industry had collapsed. This industry, I thought I was going to be in forever had literally just evaporated. I was fucked.

I wasn't making any money. I owed a lot of money because I bought this crazy big house. I was 23 years old. And you're by yourself? 23 years old hanging out at a bar up the block from my house. And I could have flushed my whole life down the toilet then.

And then I started doing standup comedy in 2010. So thank God that happened. Thank God that happened. And that turned everything around. Oh, so thank God. Yeah, it's a good thing. Turned everything around. Yeah.

Well, cause it gave me an outlet for the passion. And then I stopped drinking and using drugs. And then I said, well, this energy of being an addict it's got to go somewhere. And then I went instead of 25, I went into standup. I was about nine years ago. So that's what led me into it. And then the food addiction just stayed with you?

The food addiction stayed with me. I mean, the food addiction is, I think it's related to the drugs. I also think that it comes from when I was a little kid. Like the idea of like, oh, you eat nice things. Makes you feel good. Makes you feel good. It's a reward.

It's how you reward yourself. So all of that stuff. I have a problem with it. I mean, I have a problem with food too. I don't know where it comes from. I don't know where it comes from. Sure, I gotta talk to someone about that. Well, I'm sure it just comes from,

you know, I mean, we all have compulsions. Like if you weren't a guy that like you, what you do, like people, like you have enough money you could just stop tomorrow. But you want to keep going and doing and getting better and doing things. Correct. So that's a certain type of person.

That's a certain type of person. That's somebody who wants to, you know, push it to the limit. But it's also like, I can't, like who, Oh, RZA was on Rogan late and he goes, I eat once a day. I'm like, motherfucker, so jealous. Interesting, yeah.

Or like Henry Rollins was like, I only drink, I wake him more, I drink carrot juice, one cup of carrot juice. That's all I drink. Yeah, but didn't he have many, many years of not doing that? No, he was sober. Forever?

Forever. Really? Never had touch alcohol or drugs. Interesting. He's just crazy. Okay. People think he's still drunk, so he's just crazy.

People think I'm still doing drugs. I mean, he's a Joe on his show. We'll say Tim Dillon, you know, he does these crazy sketches. He's a sober guy who seems like a drunk guy. That's hilarious. I mean, I put on a wig, I yell and scream as Megan McCain. This is not something a sober person does.

Or they do. Yeah, or they do. An awesome sober person. But it's like, it's like Delia, everyone thinks he's like drugged out. All the time. Never touched anything. Yeah, it's interesting.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What about sex addiction? Do you have that? I don't know. Cause I know people with that, and that ruins lives just like drug addiction. It could, but I'm, I have friends that cannot stay faithful.

I don't, my thing is, is like, I know guys who have that issue, and it's so consuming, so, such a demon. It unravels. It unravels everything you're trying to do, but I want to get so successful as a standup comic that that's more important to me than any, so you, yeah, it's like the transference

of all these things into comedy, where it's like, let comedy. Comedy's keeping me on a path. Yeah, comedy keeps it, I think comedy keeps a lot of us on a path. Correct, where, you know, whether they're comics or athletes before, if things aren't going good for them,

and they, you get off a beaten path, and you don't have anywhere to put your energy, that's where guys get in trouble. Right. What would you say? I'm starting to stay on this path. What would you say to, what do you think about all this shit where people are like,

we don't want our kids playing football anymore, because, well, I mean, how do you feel about this? Way in, way in. Way in. Get a viral clip. What are we thinking? Listen, man, I think with football, it's... Here's Brendan Schaub on the football controversy,

right here, right now. Do you watch football? On the Tim Dillon show. Do you watch football? I have, yes. Because like last night, Miles Garrett took a quarterback's helmet off and hit him with it. Okay.

And they spent him for the season. That's too much, I think. Way too much. Way too much. No, take him out for a game. Yes. It's the culture we live in, where everything's like this, this, you know,

cancel culture. But in fairness to him, he should have hit a woman. Keep going. If you're gonna do it, hit a woman. If you're gonna do it, hit your partner and you'll be back in next game. Or the UFC assigned you. So the thing is, is with football, it's just, it's like,

if that's what they want to do, man, let them do it. If the kid loves playing football. But the argument is that the kids are young and they don't know the repercussions of what they're doing. See, I don't think you should let kids, let's see. Your son is three. My son's three. He's not playing tackle football till he's, I don't know.

I don't know, man. It's a tough thing. Now as a parent, it's tough. But he's not playing tackle football. Like I started playing tackle, I think when I was six, which is too early. So you're, you say no tackle football for these kids. Until they get a little older.

Yeah. I don't want CP. We tackle football. We don't need that. So, so until what is the appropriate? I don't know. I get to make middle school. Middle school, you think they can evaluate

all of the different repercussions? No. I just think it's what you sign up for, man. You know? And here's the other thing is, is brain trauma, like CTs, is it a problem? Yes. The majority of players don't have anything.

Right. You just hear about the worst case scenario. The odds are you're going to be fine. Right. Sure, you're going to have fucked up knees and ankles and necks and breasts and, but that's what comes with the territory. Transgender children playing football.

Sure. Like ice box for more children. Where do you want this? Fuck it. Put them in. Get the kids that we're just talking about. Now they're transgender. Transgender, let them play, man.

What? No, but this is a big deal for, this is a huge problem now. You have women identifying as men. No, you have men identifying as women and then they beat up women. That's weird. That's not good, right?

When it comes to mixed martial arts, that's weird. That's strange. But that's the only part where it's strange. Really? What about cycling? What about, you know, men have all these advantages and then they take hormones and then they become women and then they dominate in those sports?

Is that fair? You don't care. I don't care. So you're breaking with Rogan and Hitchcliff on this, Brendan Schaub, four trans athletes. This is very interesting. I like this. You know why?

Because I- Schaub is woke. Schaub is woke. I don't care. You don't care. I don't care. I never cared about a cycling race. Or like, have you seen the one just like diesel chick

and she's sprinting? But she's not a, she's not a, she didn't, you know, she was in a, she was in a dude that had hormone replacement therapy and became a chick. She's a female, clitoris, everything breast, but her testosterone is through the fucking roof. Right. And they're like, well, her testosterone is the same

as more than dudes. But that's what she's put, she's put on this earth by whatever you believe in the creator. And she just has more testosterone. But isn't that a rarity? That's rare. That's rare, but- She's a freak of nature.

With all due respect. Let her do her thing. Right. Transport you're cool with, except for the MMA. Don't, except for MMA. Don't care. She doesn't affect you. Don't care.

Interesting. Don't care. Interesting. Okay. If it's MMA, if it's wrestling, that's a little dicey. That's a little dicey. But if it's cycling, don't care. Track, don't care.

Now most people know this about you. You were, you were a huge supporter and you funded Donald Trump's campaign last time. You used millions and millions of dollars. That's where all my money goes. And what do you think about Donald Trump? Donald Trump as the president of the United States. Two-term Trump.

I think that, I just think people- We just gotta do hot buttons. We're just trying to get clear. We're trying to do like- Dude, dude, dude. These are just hot buttons. We all feel the same way about him. We think he's funny.

He probably shouldn't be the president. That's literally the way we feel. He's a celebrity who probably shouldn't be the president. Probably shouldn't be the president. I think the majority of Americans- But he's very funny. He's very funny, hilarious. I think majority of Americans are sick of politicians.

And he was like the- We're trying to burn it down. It could have been anybody. We're burning the system down. Here's what's scary. When Kanye West goes, I'm running for president in 2024, the rock, you're like, damn, these motherfuckers could win.

They could absolutely win. I'm making Logan Paul president. We've talked about it a bunch on the show. I'm not gonna talk about it again. I'm down for that. But it will happen. I'm telling you, it's gonna happen. His brother being in the house as well.

We're gonna keep his brother at bay a little bit. We're gonna work more with Logan. His brother's being less of a fuck. I like Jake. We don't work with Logan. I like Jake. We gotta tone it down a tad. We gotta tone it down a bit.

We're gonna work with Logan. Fine, Jake will do agriculture. We gotta tone it down. We're gonna work with Logan first. When you hear politicians going millionaires of the problem, rich people of the problem, you're somebody who has a lot of money. What do you feel like when you hear that,

when you hear Bernie Sanders or people like that? Now, they're not necessarily talking about you. They're talking about the billionaire class. You're talking about the 0.001%. Right, but it doesn't make sense. You're a wealthy person. And they would come. I'm not 0.001.

But they would come with the pitchforks for you. It's bullshit because I work for this. I work for this. I agree. I agree. But they're also all millionaires. Some of them are. Bernie is.

Bernie, for sure. But the people that are just angry at rich people, how do you think maybe they're misguided? Because some of them have a point. Some have a point. The people of these families and stuff. Yeah, they agree. That billions of dollars forever.

But people are self-made entrepreneurs. You shouldn't touch them. That's fucked up. That's the American dream, right? Right. What are you doing? I know. More, less, even.

How dare you? Your girlfriend is Mexican. Born and raised. Is she? Illegally. What? Do you, real interesting. Now, do you ever threaten her with a little call

to the authorities if she gets wise? Every Thursday. Yeah. You can go listen. Daddy has to do it. We can really, yeah. You talk back. What, does she hate Trump?

Because, of course, it makes sense. Man, it's not that she hates Trump. She doesn't like, here's the thing. Does she Americanize it? Can she read and write and everything? Kind of. English tough. A little bit.

Right. She's in and out. She's probably smoking. She's cool. Very attractive. Very good. Good mother. Good mother.

Mexican dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course. Very nurturing, warm. Yes. Does she make a pandale? What's that cake they have? Sopa.

Dama Sopa. Something like that. Yeah. Yeah. What should she kill it with the enchiladas? She kills it with the enchiladas. Does she order the Mexican made around? And is that interesting dynamic?

Ooh. Here's the interesting dynamic. The Mexican made, I know you think you're a white bitch. You're in a white bitch. Yeah, she's like, bitch, we know where you come from. Guadalajara. Here's the thing though. In my house, I'm the only one who doesn't speak Spanish.

So in my house, I'm like, and I have a whole bit about it. It's like I'm a refugee in my own house. Oh, that's hilarious. There's not one word of English being spoken. So your son's. Even my son. His first language is Spanish.

Really? His English from his dad. So he knows he's gonna have a speech impediment. So it's like, it's tough. Is he a wild kid? How do you see, he's young yet. It's tough to tell. Tough to tell.

Lot of energy. Lot of energy, but you don't know which way it's gonna go. No idea. You don't know if he's gonna be like Jake Paul, where you have to like, you're like, you have to get out of this. You don't know if you have to. He's a gold friend.

I think there was an article that said 31% of kids want to be YouTubers. Makes sense. There's so much money now. So much money. It's crazy. How do you feel about society? When you look at what's happening on social media

and YouTube and things like that, does it make you feel confident where society's going? I think it's gonna balance out. I think now we're like just realizing how addictive social media is. How it's like this bullying thing with young kids and kids who commit suicide.

There's like this cancel culture and this hate culture on there. And it's a good thing. It's also super negative. And I think it's gonna sway back over here. And now you see how Instagram is, you can't see likes anymore. Instagram, I feel like it's on its way out.

Oh, you think so? Well, this is what they did with Facebook. They started playing around with it. And then it just became like a haven for boomers to scream at each other. Instagram, I think they're just starting to play around. Like the likes thing might not be the biggest deal. But I think if they keep fucking around with it,

they keep changing the algorithm, that it's more about selling stuff. Well, it's also like how hot any of these things stay forever. Young kids are on TikTok now, right? I don't, I don't know what TikTok is. TikTok's happening. Are you on there? No, I should be.

You know TikTok. It's that thing where people are dancing, they're falling down, they're doing crazy things. 15 second looping videos. It's 10 seconds. They have all those TikTok cringe combination. It's like boomerang? It's like a 15 second, like a vine, but longer.

And it's all those cringe compilations. But like our fan base isn't there. No, they can't buy tickets. You're right. But I'm just saying when you look at like at one point. There's always gonna be something. But Facebook's around, Twitter's around, right? Twitter's around, Twitter was going away,

but then Trump energized it and it became political. I like Twitter a lot because you can put things out. People can share them relatively easily. Agree. She put a video up, but I do like Instagram too. I don't want it to go away. I'm just saying there's always gonna be the next thing. Right?

Yeah. I think what we're gonna learn is social media and you're giving these kind of these dark demons a voice where it gives them credibility to hate on successful people or hate on talented people and also bully kids. So I think it's gonna even out where like, oh shit, this isn't it. Given everybody a voice and they're giving them opinion,

it's not good. So Brendon Shab here on the Tim Dillon Show for taking away the internet from people. So you get rid of it. Only losers. So not everyone should be able to communicate on social media. They shouldn't be able to communicate

to certain people, you know? The problem is now. The access is due. We've got rid of that fourth wall. I know. When we're talking about walls, build that wall. Build that wall on social media. Build that wall to the people in their dad's basements to me.

Yeah. I think here's what's scary and what you find out on social media. I think a lot of people are in basements. Like a lot of people are in their dad's basement. There's a lot of anger. There's a lot of mental illness. 100%, but there's also, it's their own mental illness.

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And it comes out and I think researchers find like, oh, this isn't good, man. It's not good. What do you tell those people that want to change your life? What should they do? Let's say somebody's watching this

and they used to hate you. Stop watching this. Stop watching. That's a great point. Stop watching this. Give it five minutes. We need five minutes for this download. Yeah, for sure.

But what is somebody who's just a bitter, angry person that hates everybody? Maybe they're racist. Maybe they hate immigrants. Maybe they hate rich people. All valid points. You know, I'm sure. Here's the, I don't know anybody.

I didn't know anybody in my group who are way more successful than me. I don't, anyone who gets online and sends hate comments. I don't, I don't, I know. I've never done it. I've never done it. I also, I don't know anyone who reads YouTube comments. Yeah.

I don't, I don't associate with anyone. So I'd probably start there by not doing that. Right, right. Stop commenting and doing crazy stuff. Well, just do a, do a, do a trial test. Get some girl you're interested in. Right. I've ever come over.

She goes, oh, what are we doing? And you go, oh, I'm going to send hateful comments to this comic or this comic. See if she sucks your dick. How crazy would it be if the girl's like, awesome. Let's go. I fucking hate them too. She's not good.

Let's get Shao. Yeah. Let's get them. Get her in the cab. Let's go. What's your Reddit name? I mean, it is sick, man. It is sick. What are you?

Are you a California till you die? Rogan talks about leaving all the time. I mean, the state is currently on fire. There's, there's always fires. I don't know. It's literally I'll always have a home there. I feel like to do stand up. I'm going to have to be there.

Yeah. So I always have, yes, I always have a home there, but I don't know. Maybe on Mulder, I'll move out. Yeah. I'll go to San Diego. I'll probably stay in California. You love California.

Love California. You're not, you've never. I hate how many people there are, but I love California. What do you think of New York as a city? I used to dislike New York because it, I get anxiety and stress me out because it's such a hustle. Right. Everything's moving and the buildings and now the last,

since I started doing stand up, going back there, being able to hang around, like get to know people. And like locals would take me around. I fucking love it. So you like it now? Love East Coast now. Love Philly, Boston, New York. Those are great cities for stand up comedy.

Boston, DC. They're all great. What's your favorite place to perform? Wilbur and Boston is pretty good. Really? Yeah. Grammarcy and New York's dope. So you're selling out.

People love you. Are you going overseas at all? Yep. I just, I think we just announced it. A 50 shades of brown tour. We're doing Europe and yeah, all over man. What do you say, what do you think the biggest thing, the biggest advantage that you have over other people

when it comes to like your ability to, you know, get people in theaters and get people out? I don't know. I don't think I have an advantage. I think I have a fan base. Well, it's an advantage, an earned advantage, but it's an advantage. Yeah, but I'm just saying like,

I don't think I have like some secret or something. Yeah. I think Burke Christ is way better at marking than I am. He's great. He's way better. I don't feel like I have an advantage when it comes to that stuff. I think, you know, I put in year,

you know, me and Brian being together for six years. So when did you meet him? Like six, seven years ago. And were you doing stand-up down or you just met him? No, met him and then start doing the fire in the kid, then took that on the road. And that's why I started doing stand-up. So fire in the kid's been around for six years.

Six years. And then you guys developed a huge fan base right out the gate and then took that on the road. And when did you meet Rogan? I mean, well, remember Rogan was a UFC commentator. Of course. So when I was fighting the UFC, me and Rogan were boys. And then we got really close when I moved to LA.

And then him and Brian were the ones who were like, do stand-up. When did you first do stand-up? First it's stand-up would be, yeah. I mean, first time we did a live fire in the kid. Cause we did at Bray Improv, 550 people. That was my open mic. And Brian was like, oh, you're going to go out

and you're going to do 10 minutes stand-up. He was like, so every show we're going to start doing this. This can be your open mic. And how was the pride of the first one go? Not great. Not great. I mean, not, you know, but that's the thing of people are like, oh, you didn't have to do the open mic

thing where no one's around. I'm like, well, hold on. You mean open mics where it's full of other comics hating on the comics who are performing. My open mic was in front of 550 people, tons of pressure. Yeah, it's huge. Now, and then your first special was showtime. How many years after that?

Three. Do you feel like when you look back to you say, that was a crazy fast crazy, insane, insane to a special that insane nuts. Yeah, wild, wild. Would you do another one tomorrow? No. Yeah. No, I'd probably wait, probably two years.

I might do, I might do something, but not a, not a, not a hour special. When you look back at the special, how do you feel about it now? Everyone hates everything they do. I hate it. I hate on my podcast. I hate my set.

I'm gonna do tonight. I hate the set. I'm gonna do tonight. I hate everything. Yeah. I'm proud of it. I'm proud of what I accomplished a short amount of time. Yeah.

I think I'm the fastest person to get a, like a big network special in under a certain amount of years. Right. Which is a blessing and a curse. But I'm proud of it, you know, for sure. Yeah. But it's like, I hate everything I do. So I don't know.

But when I do a special in three years, which will be way better than that one, I'm gonna hate that one. Who's your fifth, you pick one guy right now where you're like, this person is somebody you watch and you're like, fuck, this guy's great. Bill Burr. Yeah.

Well, there's a few. There's Burr. Yeah. There's a Schultz. Mark Norman. Shit, man. There's a few of them. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, Burr is amazing. They're all amazing. Everyone that you mentioned. What? Do you know Faheem? Yeah, Faheem's great. Yeah, yeah.

Performance him a lot. We're on usually together in the O.R. Monster. Like you have to reach out to him. Yeah, he's great. Joke for joke, talent level, Faheem to me is top three around the store. Who are your podcasters that you're like,

these guys are bananas? Do you listen to other podcasters? Not really. My favorite podcasters. I can't listen to other podcasters like mine, like silly shit that we do. Right, but is there anybody, is there any podcasters out there?

Yeah, Dax Shepard, armchair expert. Interesting. Okay. That's my favorite podcasters. What does he talk about? His is more of like a, he has guests on. There's a Monica Padman who's like his like co-pilot.

She's really smart. They're like, it's just, it's just like informative. He's been through so much shit and therapy that he put, he like, I learn a lot from it. Are you a therapy guy? Is that a student? I've been to therapy, but I don't, my therapy is from like, you know,

I probably should go, but I don't have time. Right. It's fucked up. Poor people that you can't beat up or you can beat up all comics, most every comic. What about Whitney Cummings? Because she's very kind of, She's kind of, she's kind of crafty.

She also has like, she's more of a mean spirit. Do you ever, because your guy was a fighter, do you ever go out in LA and look at somebody and go, that's would be a tough fight. That guy's a monster. Not once, not once. I don't even think about fighting. Well, no, I know.

I can't remember last time I thought about fighting. Interesting. Do you think it's because you're just a secure guy? Cause there's a lot of little guys that always get in fights. It's not that I'm secure. I'm more of like, oh, these guys, they're going to think my non-bad at comedy. I'm thinking of comedy and cerebral stuff.

Interesting. And then also somebody, they're going to sue you for your house. Well, it's like, I walk in the room like, ah, fuck man. These guys are going to think guys don't belong there. Or I'm not as smart as these guys. Or I've only been doing it for four years.

Right. So whatever it's good about that. I'm worried about that. Yeah. I'm not worried about, oh, can these guys beat me up? Right. Right. What about like, that, like the thing,

like, you know, Rogan's famous for his kick, right? He has that famous kick that he does on YouTube or whatever. That famous first kick, like fucking. Well, you know, I don't mean, I mean, in the fighting world, like. Like that's in Barbosa. No, of course, but like people will show me. They'll be like, look at that kick.

That's great. Do you have like a fighting move that you're known for? I was known for like my Darsh Choke. Okay, now explain what that is. Cause that's interesting to me. Yeah. So like if a guy were to like. What's it called?

Darsh Choke. Darsh Choke. It's like, were there arms like this? Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. So you would just choke people.

It was, I was very, I was good at it and getting it from different, all different positions. Dude, were you ever wrestling guys? You ever watched like WWF, WWE growing up? I did. And then I turned 10 and then got over it. I went with you. Yeah.

I think it's a little depressing how comics still go to WrestleMania when they're in their 30. I mean, it's a little much. I can't, I can't get into it. Me and Tony Hinch could have talked about this all the time. Like I had a bit of my. Tony loves it. I had my bit, a bit on my social,

Hulk Hogan Tony's like, dude, come on man. You don't need to be doing that. Right. I'm like, it's Hulk Hogan. Yeah. He's already made the sex tape. Oh yeah. No, don't do it.

Well, he's just like, come on. If you're going to do that, man, you know, it's like, they just like, they, like that's their Joe Montana. That's their, you know, Richard Pryor. Like they, Yeah, they're huge. I just can't get it. Cause you did the real thing.

It's like, why? We know it's that choreographed dancer side. I tried to get into it and rock you and me fucking 69.99. I watched him like, this is terrible. Yeah, it's not good. It's so strange. It's not good. In closing, what are, is there anything

that you would say to, you know, people that are excited about what you're doing and to feel like, are there, are there things where you're like, I want to make these things better. Like I want to, like, are there, are there things that you're excited to do? Do you have any interest in doing anything other than podcasting or standup?

If you had the money, is there a version of Brendan Schaub that puts out, what? That stops doing it? No, that puts out a movie that puts out a documentary that puts out TV show. Yeah, I've been offered. But I mean, like yourself making it. Like, do you ever say to yourself,

I want to make more shit? Different shit. The only thing I would do is do like a buddy comedy like series, but with all our, all our friends. Yeah. I mean, that's not a bad idea. So like with Theo, Brian, Delia, Segura, Joey Diaz wrote like all the guys.

I'd be down for that, but outside that, no. Like I get offered movie stuff all the time, auditions, it's just not. Stand-up's hard enough. I mean, if you could kind of do it. Again, if it was like with me and Brian or me and Theo, yeah, I'd be down. But if it's just, if it's not.

Because I think maybe that's direction things will go eventually. Agree. You know? Well, but I'll, with like, you know, everyone has kind of, we have this built in audience from the podcast and standup, where if you think of all our crew in LA,

it's like, it's kind of a network. Think how much power is in that. Yeah. So like all these like Comedy Central, Spike, all these networks, they're going to want that audience. They're trying to get in the digital space. Yes. We're already there.

It's interesting because I mean, we do so much podcasting and standup. There's probably other things that we could do eventually. A hundred percent. You know, because there's so many like, I've always wanted to do a thing about what I was like in mortgages and then cast like Coco Diaz or Santino or like these guys, you know,

like in like that type of thing. And I think in a few years, that would absolutely be possible. And you could fund it yourself. Yeah. A hundred percent. I think that that'll be the next wave. Where can people find you? You want to plug anything, promote anything?

Just come out. This will come out Sunday night. I'm in Salt Lake City. Sunday, Saturday, 12 a.m. So Sunday day. Salt Lake City, Utah next week. Wise guys and then. Great.

Wise guys is great. Great club. Go to, I think it's called something's diner, roses diner or something. Red iguana, bro. Red iguanas dough, but then there's also a weird diner up in the hills. It's just beautiful in that area.

Yeah, I'll get you. Oh, I have Kansas City. First we get December and then I'm in Jersey. I think one night, December 14th. Fighter in the cat. Tfat K.com. T-Fat. T-Fat K.

T-Fat K. Yep. Dot com. Very good. Thanks for coming on, dude. Thanks for making. Yeah. Thanks for making the time.

I know this was good to see you, brother. Yeah, I'll be, I'll come see you guys soon. I love you guys. Yeah, you too, man. Love you, man. All right, guys, thanks so much.