The Trillionaire Mindset - 72: We’re Buying a Subway ft. Podcast But Outside
Episode Date: February 11, 2023Become an exclusive member to get ad-free and bonus episodes at https://bit.ly/tmgstudiosTV_trill72_audio Ben and Emil are fresh off their appearance on Podcast But Outside, so it is only right that ...Cole and Andrew drop by the ship! They’re all going in on a Subway franchise, buying insane items off of Alibaba, and experimenting in Meta’s VR hellscape. We just went live last Thursday and if you missed it check out our most recent live stream on our YouTube channel now! Go to https://buyraycon.com/trill to get 15% off your order! Buy tix to Emil’s show here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/tuck-shop-comedy-224-tickets-538247451617 Check out our channel page on Apple Podcasts, go to: https://apple.co/trillionaire SUBSCRIBE to Trillionaire Mindset at https://www.youtube.com/trillionairemindset Want to subscribe to our newsletter? http://bit.ly/3W0J1NT Trillionaire Highlights Channel: https://www.youtube.com/TrillionaireMindsetHighlights Trillionaire IG: https://www.instagram.com/trillionairepod Trillionaire Twitter: https://twitter.com/trillionairepod TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang BEN https://www.instagram.com/bencahn/ https://twitter.com/Buncahn EMIL https://www.instagram.com/emilderosa/ https://twitter.com/emilderosa *DISCLOSURE: THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED IN THIS VIDEO ARE SOLELY THOSE OF THE PARTICIPANTS INVOLVED. THESE OPINIONS DO NOT REFLECT THE OPINIONS OF ANYONE ELSE. THIS IS NOT INVESTMENT ADVICE. THE VIEWER OF THE VIDEO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR CONSIDERING ANY INFORMATION CAREFULLY AND MAKING THEIR OWN DECISIONS TO BUY OR SELL OR HOLD ANY INVESTMENT. SOME OF THE CONTENT OF THIS VIDEO IS CONSIDERED TO BE SATIRE AND MAY NOT BE CONSIDERED FACTUAL AND SHOULD BE TAKEN IN SUCH LIGHT. THE COMMENTS MADE IN THIS VIDEO ARE FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND ARE NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN LITERALLY.*
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello and welcome to the Trilly in our mindset. I am Ben Conn. I am Emil de Rosa and this is episode 72
While you're here, maybe check out the disclaimer. Don't forget to read that disclaimer follow us and subscribe and comment
bitch
We went live yesterday if you missed it you can go back and watch it on our channel and that channel again is Trilly in our mindset
How you doing Ben?
Good. I got one more announcement.
We're gonna restock the Columbine Church.
Yes, Columbine Church.
Columbo Church soon.
We got Blue and Pink posters, which are,
what's what we got.
And we're working on a new sticker.
We heard some complaints that the last ones
were a little race sticky enough.
Oh.
Yes.
That's not sticky enough.
Yeah.
But they're still racist.
And it's a lot harder than you think, actually,
to work on a new sticker.
You would think that we would just get one done,
but we're actually putting a lot of effort into it.
And we got a whole team of kids designing it.
Well, we need their little hands
through the artwork.
Yes, the stickers are tiny.
So how's the no-sigger that's going, Dan?
Oh, man.
What's up with that?
The figures, good. well, you know what,
I realized that it fucked up my eyes.
To do smoking or to not.
To quit.
So that I had to, I got,
We get glasses.
It basically reversed my lacing.
Yeah, so I have glasses now.
Well, if there's smoke all along,
lacing needs smoke.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And you, yeah, and I think,
what's up with your hair? It's better
It's blonde now. Yeah, yeah blonde is better actually. Yeah, yeah
I'm doing a whole new sexy thing as well. So that's cool. Oh, that's awesome
Yeah, I'm going sexy mode. Yeah me too. Yeah, I think it's actually better that I have glasses on right Because otherwise my eyes look like too close together.
Oh.
They spread, that spreads them out a little bit.
It's almost like braces, but the opposite.
Yeah.
Cool.
Well, should we get our guests?
I heard our podcast is going to have.
Doc market.
Right.
Are you freaking out about?
Yeah.
All right.
Well, they was, I don't know if you guys saw, they just announced that all, they're all,
all the stocks are changing starting today
It's like
We need consistent yeah, no, not giving it to I want I want to wake up. I know just knowing what
No, it's gonna be different all the time and that's the new thing they're doing so you know good luck
Should we get to this out?
Should we start it?
Yeah, I'd like to. Alright. Ha ha'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. Hey, what's up? Hey, Neil, how are you guys? Good, good. Do you like the new pendant of meal? Yeah, me too.
Yeah, me too.
That's great.
But you know, sometimes it's good to go classic style.
How are the classic ones doing?
Classic ones?
Still got it, baby.
Yeah, I've got it.
Yeah, I'm a little burpy this morning,
which I was just saying it sucks.
I do like the new sexy mode of meal though.
Oh, yeah, me too.
Oh, thank you, that helped.
Yeah.
You tapped me on the back.
Oh yeah, burping like a baby. Yeah, give too. Oh, thank you, that helped. Yeah. He tapped me on the back. Oh yeah, burping like a baby.
Yeah.
Yeah, give it a shot.
It's not getting, it's not coming out.
Maybe I need to be bent over.
Oh, like, and I do it lower.
Yeah, it's okay.
We'll figure it out.
Cool.
You can just get me later.
Well, everybody, in case you haven't noticed by now, we've got the
boys from podcasts but outside joining us today. It was only proper since we went on their
show yesterday. That's like three days ago. Two days ago. Two days ago. Two days ago.
Two days ago for you guys. We've got Cole and Okay. And they're gonna be joining us today.
And it's gonna be very special.
They'll be joining us.
Yeah, I've already seen the episode by the way.
It's all.
Ooh.
Yeah, you have.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, thank God, it's gonna be fun.
It's really good.
Yeah, we were talking about it on the way.
Yeah, it's really funny.
We were listening to it on the way here, actually.
It's really good.
Yeah, fuck.
Okay, well, that's great because you guys,
so you guys were great.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we were good.
Yeah, you guys are good as well. Yeah, okay
Yeah, we usually have stinkers. Yeah, there was some fun stuff our last week's episode was a real doozy stinker stinker runie. Oh
Yeah, yeah, I have a lot of them. Yeah, you to admit that yeah, cuz I mean yeah, it sets the bar low. Here comes a burp
Well, that's burping. Can I I'm going to plug something real quick, because I want everyone to know.
By the time this comes out tomorrow, the link should be live, but we've talked about
on the show before.
I'm restarting this comedy show we used to do, and it's going to be February 24th, the
permanent records roadhouse.
We'll put a link in the description or something, or just go to my Instagram,
and there'll be tickets there.
It's gonna be super fun.
Brandon Wardell is gonna be on there,
need a tar, Fumi Abe.
It's gonna be sick.
Thanks for asking me to do it,
but actually I'll be out of town that day.
Oh, we'll get you out of town.
Yeah, I'll be out of town.
Thanks for asking me about you.
I'm gonna be out of town.
Yeah, I'll be out of town.
I'm always on you.
Where are you gonna be?
We're gonna be in Vancouver, Canada
at the JFL Comedy Festival, February 25th. We have a show. Oh, that's the J.I.L.A.
I'll do your show. Yeah, okay great. No, you'll be out of time too. No, I'll yeah, but I want to do that one. No, but you have to fly to Canada with me.
That one sounds cool though. No, it's gonna be great. We used to do it in my backyard and now we finally found a place.
That's a cool venue. I've been there. It's good. Yeah, yeah. I'm super stoked.
Cool.
Cool.
Congrats.
I hope it's continues to do well.
Come to the show.
It's going to be a party actor.
And you might have time the next day to fly to Canada and see us.
Yeah.
Well, I think I'm going to do that one.
You might do.
Plug it.
Tell them where to go.
No, we just have, we know.
We have podcasts outside.
It's our podcast where we're interviewing strangers on the street.
You guys are just a guest on it.
It's very fun.
We also have a live show that's even better where we pull in random strangers from the streets around the venue
Bring them into a venue full of people chanting their name and we interview them live on stage. Yeah, it's really I've been good
And we got to say it's very fun. Oh, thank you guys for coming. I you guys do a good job. I appreciate you guys coming
So we never know who we're gonna get. Yeah last night show. Yeah, we did a show in LA the other night
We got this guy our first guest. So we usually have about four to five strangers off the street the first guest
was a guy who had, he was an expert in tantric sex.
Yeah.
And so I was like, the only thing I know about that
is that some people can orgasm without touching themselves.
I said, could you do that?
He's like, yeah, I was like, on this stage.
No.
And he's like, yeah.
And we basically just spent the entire rest of the show
just building up to him eventually.
Well, we were debating on whether or not it was ethical.
So we were putting the audience through that
and let that happen.
Like half the audience was chanting,
really into it.
And then there was a girl in the front row
who said, I'm 16.
And then we decided the solution we had was we said,
look, we'll end the show a minute early.
And anyone who's uncomfortable or 16 can leave.
And then Cole was going to play the cum siren,
meaning there's a man about to come on stage.
We did.
Anyway, so yeah, we don't want to spoil it.
No, spoiler.
Oh, yeah, yeah, you got to check it out on.
Well, it might come out.
I kind of hope he didn't.
I don't know, just something sad about walking off stage
with a bit of a scene of come.
The funny thing is he was there the entire hour of our show
and he would just chime in every once in a while.
We'd be interviewing someone about their job
or their personal life and then we'd just say,
do you have any questions Jeremy, the tantric guy?
And he'd go, yeah, he was really like very mild mannered,
barely said anything, he'd just go, yes, how's your orgasm?
Oh my god. That was his question. Was was he hot oh yeah he looked kind of like a
Viking yeah he looked like a Viking okay yeah sting sting used to do tantrum
sex you probably still does probably still does you don't stop that brother yeah
they would just have sex for hours that sounds dehydrating hmm now they were
always drinking water yeah what the what's the longest you've had sex?
Don't do that to me, Ben. Okay. I said, say mine. I know you look 40 minutes probably.
Where it's like, God, damn, I got to stop. I'm just at a certain point you're exercising,
you're not having sex. You know, we're going to abandon you here. Okay. You know, what, a year ago, a year and a half ago,
when I first heard that you were getting,
when you got this gig,
that you were gonna host a podcast.
Yeah.
I was terrified for you.
Why?
Because you're you.
Oh, oh yeah.
And here's the thing.
I've known you for what maybe
Ten years now since vine close to that we've been friends. I know
Everyone who loves you loves you because you're you. I love you because you're you reading through our comments on your episode
shocked me and
Made me feel so Heart-wormed that there were people who
Know who understand you they know you are a peer of heart. Yeah, yeah, okay made me feel so heart-wormed that there were people who
know, who understand you. They know you are a peer of heart.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
So that I do feel seen by most people
and for those of you who see me, I see you too.
Yeah, but they call themselves Benzels.
I've seen that.
I've seen that.
I've seen that posted around.
Yeah.
Anyway, we've had long talks with our legal department
about the Benzels, but is it a movement you stand behind?
No, oh no, interesting.
I think they're dangerous.
Wow, I think.
Yeah, so if you're a Benzel, do not go to a meal show.
Okay, don't go to his show.
No, I'll be there, I'll be there.
I'll be there.
No, see down to yourself.
This is the kind of stuff where I'm like, no, no, leave those guys alone. I'll be there. I'll be there. No, this is the kind of stuff where I'm like, no, leave those guys
I'll be there in the crowd. No, no cut that fine me find me. We're stronger together
You know bring me something like we can't even do the show because there's just a bunch of guys around Ben chanting one of us
Hey, so did you know that me and Cole look alike?
It is did you guys plan this kind of a...
Yeah, for the list?
No, but we do somewhat match.
Yeah, it's like we need Mark Rebole to be on the other side.
I have a photo with him as well.
You do?
Yeah, fuck me.
You know what the problem is though, you don't have your glasses anymore,
so it's not quite the same.
Yeah, you happy with Lacer?
Yeah, so happy.
Get it.
I like wearing glasses.
I did.
And then when you don't anymore, especially for surfing, man,
oh, yeah, I work contacts during that.
That's dangerous.
Oh, really?
Yeah, the water gets in your eyes,
and they could blast to the back of your eye.
I've never been blinded for me.
Fuck, okay, well, I guess I'm wrong again.
Ha, man, wow.
So, when I went to make the thumbnail for our,
your episode, I googled Ben Khan and then I forgot that this photo existed.
Oh, right.
Of us, I remember this.
It was you, me and John Ryan scroll up.
Yeah, we went to, yeah, A and C.
It's, it's creepy.
It's, yeah.
The way both of your hair swoops down in the exact same way.
Wow, yeah, look at that.
It's wild.
Oh, yeah.
Big brother, big brother and little brother.
Who's big brother?
I am, I'm older.
Yeah, do I still look like that?
Yeah, your beard is thicker.
Different glasses.
Yeah.
You got the nose pad glasses now.
Yeah.
That means they got the little plastic nose pads
instead of just the acrylic all the way through.
Yeah.
What about the glasses talk with Ben Con?
Have people mistaken you for me?
On the internet, yeah.
My own brother, my brother Sam, has multiple times
when you've posted photos had like a weird brain fart
because he's like, wait, this has been,
but it looks like the photos.
You posted photos, so yeah, I don't,
I've done that with you posting photos,
where I'm like, I don't remember taking them.
No way.
Yeah, that's happening to me.
Wait, I'm sorry, where are you?
Where are you?
A.M.C.
No, we're at the arc light.
Oh, arc light, yeah.
You could go to movies that early?
I guess.
No, I think we're just eating there.
I think this must have been taken before May 5th, 2020. Yeah, I think it's, oh yeah. I don't think, I think we're just eating there. I think this must have been taken before May 5th, 2020.
Yeah, I think it's, oh yeah.
I don't think, I think yeah.
Yeah, because the arc light was definitely close.
I think Cole was clearly going through some kind of quarantine
like withdrawal and was just looking through old pictures
of himself and with friends and crying.
Wait, what, scroll up?
What was the context of this?
Oh, there's one, who the fuck is that guy? Oh yeah, it's one more. Who the fuck is that guy?
Oh yeah, definitely an old picture.
I hate that guy.
Wow, is that really?
For the audio listener, it's a chimera of me and Cole.
And he's got big teeth.
It does look like a prize.
It looks like you too.
Yeah, I hate this guy.
Really?
Yeah, there's something in me that's just...
Do you know him?
Isn't he a DJ or something?
Probably some actor, some shit.
I don't know, he's such. He's kind of like a hotter you guys fuck you.
I don't think so actually.
I don't I think he's busted.
Yeah, I think he's busted.
I kind of find him attractive.
Yeah, he looks like a throw a little bit of Hugh Grant in there too.
Oh, he has got that.
Yeah, if you mixed up all of our come and found a willing and if it worked that way.
Yeah, and found a woman and and if it worked that way, and found a woman.
And what with her?
What, what, not all with her?
Put it in there.
And where?
Inside of her vagina.
That's awesome.
Yeah.
And then that was, that's the baby, like, I don't know, 30 years ago.
By the way, that sounds really cool.
Yeah.
Well, that's how they do it.
It's called in vitro.
That sounds like a really cool plan.
That's how you do it.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure in vitro.
You get three guys coming one place. That's how you do it. Yeah, I'm pretty sure in vitro you get three guys come in one place mix it up
Right then they do it with the gg
They mix it up and you say no, who's they really make it up though? They really do pretend you really yeah
I worked as a while. I was the guy mixing him up
What do you use my mouth? Oh, was you like I?
Switch it around it interesting
Oh, so you like are like switching around it. Interesting.
That's cool.
You meant your tongue.
No, you should also lubricate it.
Anyway, this is the number one finance podcast.
We are going to get to talking.
Yeah, let's get into it.
Boy, you guys hear about the...
You guys are, well, we are the king.
Speaking of movie theaters, we'll skip the subway talk. Oh, yeah, AMC
Ben wait a little in the club. Yeah, I'd like to talk about subway, but it's okay. No, let's go subway
Well, but we get the movies. We just had the movie theater. Yeah, you're right. No the guest
No, no, I want you to go. Okay. I want you to do what you want. So I want to hear more about come
Good boy. Well, what do you want to know?
What is it?
Nobody really knows.
Nobody really knows.
It's magical.
How many sperm is in the cum?
I think millions.
Millions, right?
Yeah, it's got to be.
Unless you smoke cigarettes and it makes them a little fucked up.
Yeah, lowers it.
Motility.
But you got so many of them.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, but you better hope one of those fucked up ones doesn't get their right.
Exactly, man.
Well, I don't know.
That's kind of fucked up the same, you know.
Gee, we a little ableist.
Jesus Christ.
Anyway, AMC the movie theater is taking a note
from airlines and they're charging different prices
based on where you sit, which I like.
I think that this is kind of okay.
In the sense that if you have a shity or seat,
you shouldn't be paying with the chocolate heads or paying.
I think they marketed it really badly, though.
I agree.
They should have just said,
we're gonna make the cheap seats bad.
We're gonna make the bad seats cheaper.
Right, yeah.
But instead they made it seem like you're paying a premium
for the good seats.
Which is what happens on planes.
Are the good seats staying at the, you know,
there's some of them on here.
Yeah.
Oh God.
But so for the extra premium, you are paying a premium for it.
Yeah.
That's okay.
I don't like that premium.
Okay, he's out.
But if you have A-list, you can just reserve any seat.
Right.
I think it's a way to get more people signing up to A-list.
Yeah.
They're just another fucking company.
A whole lot of memberships, baby.
Getting the subscription money and just siphoning that money
I just put Alexa started to do if you ask Alexa to play a song she'll say suffering songs by blank and similar artists
Yes, definitely yeah, come on. Yeah, yeah, she can even speak great like drunk. She's drunk
I'll you have to pay extra for sober Alexa
The drug line is gotta be Amazon problem.
Drug butts free and she's definitely kind of a bit loose.
But you want someone that is with it.
You do have to pay extra.
It's suffering.
So, look at that.
Wait, so you say play an artist and it'll show?
You said sufferlings.
She said shuffling songs by Blank and similar artists.
So then she'll play like one song and then it's just some other bullcrap that you
don't really care to listen to. And now there's ads in between songs. So like if you want only to
play one artist you have to subscribe to Amazon Music or you have to get like...
What can you link your spotify? Yeah, I don't know. I think that's what you have to do.
My man, yeah, you got to link your spotify., you got to link your Spotify. I do that. Okay.
Big time.
I didn't know.
Or in my case, my Google home.
Oh God.
I just say, hey, Google plays, you know,
whatever radio station.
Okay, playing Sohnsev from I Heart Radio.
And then I get I Heart Radio commercials, which suck.
I'm a little old school.
I just have like a DJ in my house all the time.
Like a guy, like a EDM guy.
And he's just standing in the corner and he's got a lot of records. And I just kind of a DJ in my house all the time, like a guy, like a EDM guy. And he's just standing in the corner
and he's got a lot of records.
And I just kind of will yell like,
hey,
Gary, Gary, yeah.
No, DJ Gary.
Hey, Gary, play, you know, play some upbeat music
and he just goes for it.
He's always ready.
That's cool, man.
How much does that cost?
Oh, I don't pay.
Oh, you don't.
I just let him, I room and board.
I, yeah, room, I know I just don't let him go. He's essentially a prisoner. Oh, yeah, but I just let him I room and board. I yeah, I know I just don't let him go.
He's essentially a prisoner. Oh, yeah, but yeah, brave to admit it on him. I know, but he's actually kind of he's down.
It's like a woke gets a woke prisoner.
Prisoner situation.
That's woke actually. Wait, so he's doing it as well.
What are the pricing tiers? Highest end preferred tier are the middle of the theaters.
And we'll be priced at a slight premium compared to its standard tier, which the
theater chain says will remain the most common choice and will be sold for the traditional
cost of a ticket.
The third tier is called value.
Ah, that's another way to say cheap, which is the seats in front row.
Fuck that shit.
Don't even have those seats. Yeah, I agree
God damn well, I guess unless you're if you're a near-sided dipshit and you're sitting down there just going
Could never be me
And planes do that too. I've never done. Yeah planes do the never gone on. Oh, man
It's like now the price they show you is basic economy. Yeah, oh that's a good price and they're like, yeah,
but if you don't want us to do like shit, you better pay us $200 more.
Yeah, I still don't understand how you can still pay.
They when they show the map, you've got the middle seat and it's like,
yeah, this one's got more legroom, $89 fucking dollars.
Cock sucker. I'm not paying that.
I'm if I'm, if I know that I might end up in that seat,
I'm just not going gonna do a seat selection,
you put me there, bitch.
I think I'm the perfect size for planes.
I would agree with that.
I'm on Delta A list,
so I can basically just show up to the airport
anytime I want and hop on any Delta play.
No way.
I'm just kidding.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
I was gonna say, I know they're,
they're salience, and that's never heard of no A list.
That's a good idea.
You can do that.
You pay $1,000 a month and you can just show up to any airport and off on a double-walk.
There's a, I think, a spirit or something just announced a membership.
Well, then then it's one of the cheat shitty no-shittier.
Interesting.
Is it a membership really?
Yeah.
Goddamn it.
Frontier? It might be Frontier or spirit it away or something.
Oh yeah.
Well, that you can just watch on HBO Max.
Yeah, very easy.
Wait, can you Google that?
What the airline subscription?
That's an interesting idea.
You can just show up and get on a flight.
Yeah, I like that.
I can.
That's going to be a mess.
Yeah, it would be a...
Oh, it sounds awful.
It sounds like a terrible idea.
I read just yesterday that Southwest Airlines
has cut in half the required amount of hours
for pilots to be trained.
That's gonna go over there.
Because they have such a shortage of pilots.
Yeah, I like that.
Wait, scroll down.
Look at this guy.
Wait, unlimited for $3.99?
He's like a muppet us.
Frontier inches, his new summer pass
offering nearly unlimited flights for $3.99.
That nearly is doing a lot of work. Yeah, yeah, with that.
You could fly all summer long for 399 on Frontier in life.
And it's called the Go Wild Summer Pass. No fucking way I'm getting on planes with people.
Wait, but no, it does say it's a terrific opportunity to have a truly epic summer and then some.
That's cool. Not interesting. I do want to soak up rays on the beach.
It's four national parks and visit new cities. They definitely
Describe it in a really cool and chill way
That really connects with my youth
God, this reminds me of like here's what travelers should know. It's gonna be a fucking nightmare
It's like how how different networks like the stragglers. I saw a billboard for MGM plus what's that?
MGM this fucking studio like who's got MGM plus. What's that? MGM, this fucking studio. Like Paramount Plus with Showtime. Yeah, who's getting MGM Plus?
I guess I thought the same thing about Paramount,
but then they got their shows
and everyone is getting in the thing.
What, they won Paramount.
Yellowstone.
No, everybody likes it.
No, I was just getting MGM Plus.
Oh, he's getting rid of MGM.
You're humiliating.
Yeah, he was streaming something boring.
I was streaming that lion roaring over and over and over and over and over. Is that the MGM?
Yeah, do it again. Do it again. Yeah, that's pretty good. Thank you. Oh
Yeah, well, so fuck AMC actually know I take it back. They like it. I like you like it
Yeah, cuz if I if I have to pick a shitty your seat
I don't want to pay the same prices the guy's sitting in the middle or gal sitting in the or person sitting in the middle
Here's what you can do.
Do you use wipes or a bidet?
I use a bidet now so I don't even touch it.
You don't touch it?
Well I didn't even touch it. You don't touch it? You don't even touch it.
Dry off, I pat off and it's good.
Man, I really should reevaluate a lot.
Right.
You should write a book about ass.
The ass Bible.
Yeah, I could write a novella.
If you wrote an autobiography, it would be all about your butt. That's not true.
It'd be a substantial portion.
Act two.
Well, that's not how you do books, but man, so Subway, huh?
Act two of my book.
About ass.
It's a play.
It's a one-man show.
Yeah, what is somebody doing?
Well, have you guys been to a subway recently?
Yeah, me neither.
Me neither.
Sorry. What about you, Cole?
This morning?
No, you didn't.
You didn't go to a sandwich.
What long?
Got a breakfast, do you know?
Got a breakfast, do you know?
Christ.
You know, they are the biggest franchise in the United States?
Yeah.
They have the most locations of any kind of franchise.
Well, wait, are they a franchise?
Yeah, they are.
Yeah.
And they're also one of the cheapest to open.
I think you only need $15,000.
Boom.
Starbucks is probably not a franchise,
it's probably the answer.
It's not?
No.
I think they used to be.
And now they're not.
McDonald's is.
Franchise means like an independent business owner
can start their own. Yeah. You just need a certain amount of money. So we could you know, it'd be a fun bit
I want to go in on a subway. You know, it would be a it would be a really fun bit
I have never seen anyone any youtuber. There probably are some hustle dipshit or whatever
But pulling me gather your money and opening a franchise of some sort but the jokes on you
You've got employee, you've heard of YouTubers like start like their own business like like Johnny's burgers or everybody.
It's just a subway or you can start like running the books.
We're like, this sucks.
It's like, it's a normal subway, but then on the door just says Mr. Beast.
It's like how you know that it's different, but everything else is the same.
We could start a Mr. Beast subway.
I'm sure Jimmy's got lawyers that'll. Yeah, but fuck with us. They're probably too busy
dealing with other stuff. I'm sure they killed people in the script game. Yeah.
Wait, so what's going on in subway, Ben? I don't know. They got new meat slicers.
They're doing all their shit, they're renovating. Well, because they're privately held,
so they don't release public earnings. but some people were saying they want to they want to get ready for a sale. Yeah, who's gonna buy them?
Quees, no, quees, no, so what's the meat slicer situation? I guess they want to make the meat they want to bring the meat slicer front and center
It was a little boost sale so they used to ship all of their meat pre sliced
Yeah, it's right. Who wants it pre sliced? I want to see it. I do. I want it fast. Give it no. I want to ship all of their meat pre-slice. Yeah, it's right. Who wants it pre-slice? I wanna see it.
I do, I want it fast.
No, I wanna slice it.
Oh yeah.
Take that big hunk of ham and slice it for me.
Not me, baby.
Well, they're taking a big bet on meat slices.
So they think if you...
But my question is, will it take longer
for your sandwich?
Hell yeah.
Okay.
But it'll look cooler.
Yeah, you'll get to watch it, have.
You get to watch it, have.
Everybody wants to see that.
You know, by the way, at my subway that I'm starting
We're gonna strip kill the animal
You're gonna see a pig we're gonna slaughter it. We're gonna during the blood. They're gonna slice it and there's gonna be DJ
Oh, yeah, he's gonna be doing
DJ Gary Gary
The prisoner DJ Gary the prisoner, but in a workway also at my subway
We are also gonna be doing tiered pricing for this for the meat. Ooh, so you do have to pay to get the prisoner, but in a work way. Also, at my subway, we are also going to be doing tiered pricing for the meat.
So you do have to pay extra for the meat
to be in the center of your sandwich.
So for the normal cheap price,
the meat's going to be kind of on the sides,
and you're not going to get meat in every bite.
But for a more premium price,
you will get meat in every single bite.
So you kind of, you have to pay extra,
and there'll be a little chart on how much it is
to put meat in different spots.
But so if your meat's all held up in the center,
is it kind of cheap sandwich? Oh, that's really cheap.
Oh, yeah, it's kind of free.
Because the outer edge, basically a free sandwich right there.
That's kind of nice.
But if you do want an even distribution of meat,
it is a surcharge.
And I'm guessing it's good.
You're not allowed to move it once they play.
No, no, no, the sandwich, because we're gonna tape it shut.
The sandwich will be taped.
It'll move it.
It'll move it.
But the sandwich is taped shut,
and we'll see if you remove the tape
Edible tape is a really genius idea. Damn
See, yeah, my subway is gonna be awesome
It sounds awesome. The Mr. Beast subway. Yeah, it is gonna be Mr. Beast themed. Yeah, damn
It's on the front door. It's just his face. Just the front door everything everything else inside is normal
Oh, I always get that I look like mr. Beast. Oh god. I'm sorry. I
Got shit. I got shit for, for,
at VidCon, we were chasing him around and going,
it's Mr. Beast, it's Mr. Beast,
and people were following him.
Yeah, 20 of them.
People swarmed me.
Are you serious?
Yeah, I was really surprised.
And he was going up to security guards.
He was like, yo, Mr. Beast.
And they were like, oh, follow me on Instagram.
I was like, I'll try.
It was so funny.
Yeah.
I'll try.
Well, he was going to have to be like,
I'm Mr. Beast, follow me.
Yeah.
It was very funny.
Yeah.
People believed him.
They took the girls with glasses on?
Yeah.
I was just by himself.
He was looking like Mr. Beast.
You do look like Mr. Beast.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Do it again.
It's uncanny.
Very good.
Wow.
You just gave a million dollars to a dog.
Do the face.
I'm million dollars.
I want to see him feed chocolate to a dog.
You just gave a million chocolates to a dog.
Forfilled this dog's wish to eat chocolate.
By the way, that reminds me of all the conservatives
on Twitter trying to give chat GPT,
like ethics 101 scenarios.
Oh, Charlie problem.
Yeah, yeah, like chat GPT.
Would you, the big one was this guy asked it,
would you say a racial slur
to save millions of people from being killed
in a nuclear holocaust in Chat GPT basically said,
no, it's always wrong to use slurs.
And then the conservatives were like,
there you have it.
AI is officially woke.
I knew it, the AI was liberal.
The AI, they, and I saw so many great replies
because Ben Shapiro tweeted about it
and then these people were like,
Ben Shapiro, would you fuck a dog to save
like 100 babies from getting aborted?
And,
no.
Did he answer?
No, of course he didn't answer,
because he's a fuck.
Answer the question.
By the way, you guys might, in the coming weeks,
you actually might unearth a bunch of videos of me saying racial slurs, and I just wanna say,
I was saying them to save millions of people.
Yeah, I just wanna come out right now and say,
the reason I was saying those slurs is
because they actually wear millions of lives at stake.
So when those videos come out, I was doing it for a good reason.
But what about when you were like,
I want to kill all those blank?
Well, that, yeah, that was just, that was more personal.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
What is, okay, no, never mind.
No, good boy.
No, I was just gonna, no.
This is my filter in action.
I love it.
See, there we go.
Broke it as possible.
We can cut it, are it?
Elon Musk replied to that slur thing
and he wrote like, this is concerning or something.
He did?
I love how he does that.
Wait, didn't Elon Musk just come out,
he tweeted, like yesterday,
he came out with like master plan three
Did you see that or he said master plan three is coming out? It's his master plan for the world
I know a guy who had a plan. Yeah. Yeah, I was a I thought it was a solution. I thought it was a
Solution to end all solutions a final. I think that was a rough translation, but it was really planned. Yeah
Oh, man. Oh, planned. Yeah. Oh man.
Uh yeah.
Master plan.
Master plan three, the path to a fully sustainable energy future for Earth will be presented
on March 1st.
We should say if we can get fucking press pass and go to this.
The future is bright.
Investor.
Oh, it's Tesla investor day.
Oh god, damn man.
Oh, he's going to come out and do a cool awkward thing and it's going to say, it probably starts at 420 on that day. Oh god damn man. Oh he's gonna come out and do a cool awkward thing and it's gonna say
it probably starts at 420 on that day. What's the overrun on him wearing a cowboy hat when he comes out?
69 over 420. Very good Ben. Yeah master plan three not great branding. What was master plan two
and one? That's a good question. What happened with those? It was buying Twitter.
Being epic.
Yes, and then now this one.
Yeah.
I hope it's like, he's opening a subway franchise.
Also, he's kind of proving that no matter what he says,
everyone just goes, did you see he just tweeted a period?
Right.
And it was just, he's funny though.
He's definitely my favorite medium.
Yeah, he's pretty. He's pretty. He's funny, straight up. No, I mean, I'm not kidding. His stuff is straight up funny just He's funny though. He's definitely like medium. Yeah, he's pretty stuff is funny straight up. No, I mean I'm not getting his stuff is straight up funny
He's funny. He's straight up really funny
No, he's just funny. I think his jokes are funny. He's epic and he's just straight up funny
I'm not I'm just saying he's funny as hell
Wow
But you know I'm I mean I was laughing a lot more when I saw some of his jokes
He's funny. Did you see how he, someone called him like God and he said,
well, Chuck Norris would have something to say about that?
Oh my God.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
At a certain point, I do think that he's leaning into it
to piss off people because he knows that.
His daughter, mostly.
Oh, yeah.
But he clearly wants people to think he's funny.
I think that's like his number one most important thing.
I swear, people to think he has a sense of humor.
He does.
Didn't he like call a big meeting and he was like,
okay, I need all of you to come up with epic memes.
And then so I can post them.
What?
I believe that.
And Twitter?
I tell you.
Yeah, I, uh, who did he do that?
Every company.
Remember, remember when the election with Trump and all the boomers were like,
it's me more fair. You got to be good at memes and they were all just meaming non-stop.
Yeah, they kind of did when the meme wars. They did. They really did. They stole Pepe.
They stole Pepe. They did the little cartoon frog. Yep. Anyway.
There wasn't so much the memes though
It was more about calling the other candidates a bitch. Yeah, that's true
Yeah, man. Okay, or we're skipping those two things with the question. You don't want to do this?
I feel like the audience might enjoy
I kind of felt like Andrew had some no
No, we're definitely not doing that. I made a joke in the meeting.
Okay.
Uh, I man.
Do you have you guys ever fucked with VR?
Um, I bought a VR headset at the beginning or like in the middle of the pandemic to play
online with friends like to play like Beat Saber and stuff, but I never use it anymore.
Yeah.
That's like a beat saber.
It's really fun.
It's like a, oh, you mean played VR.
I thought you might like heavy over,
I don't know,
yeah, it's really fun.
Beat Saber is like a guitar hero type game
where it's like a two-a-beat,
but you're like moving your arms, it's fun.
It's like the number one fun game on VR.
So you're like a air traffic controller.
Basically, yeah.
Yes.
Yes.
You are like an air traffic controller.
Have you played it?
I have never played Beat Saber,
but I got the,
the God, I was gonna call it the Facebook tetanus.
Oculus?
Oculus.
Is it tetanus?
Yeah.
The Oculus Tetanus.
Jesus Christ.
Should we get Beat Saber?
It's the best game.
Well, I played, yeah, here you go.
Holy shit.
It's fun.
It's really cool playing it.
It's called it blocks.
It's really hard, and it's a straight up workout.
Like, you get exhausted doing it.
Yeah.
Damn.
Did you ever go into Horizon Worlds?
Facebook's?
I haven't done that.
Yeah.
It's cool.
No, it's awful.
And that's like they're pushing this big initiative
at Facebook, at Metta, excuse me.
Because only, oh yeah, we'll get to that.
But only like, I think they only have 10% of VR users
are going to Horizon Worlds and they're pushing internally
for like 20% of people. And part to horizon worlds and they're pushing internally for like 20% of people.
And part of the way that they're doing that
is lowering the age limit
so that they can have more children in there.
Because when you go in there,
it's like a lot of little kids
and they obviously, it's, yeah, it's a-
Is it like second life kind of but like buggy?
Yeah.
And they are also trying to grow it
by moving it out of VR and just
on to like a mobile game. So they're basically. Oh, that's going to be brutal. Yeah. It's just
they're trying to now recreate like the Sims. Wait, so 10% of all VR users are only that's all
meta has. Yeah. Where the hell else are? I don't know. Or they're they're going for like a 10% a month of their users. It's just, yeah, it's a big ol' fucking flop in its sucks.
Yeah, it does not look good.
Yeah, but they're gonna have legs soon.
Leg?
They'll have legs.
They'll have premium.
Yeah, you got to be in here.
I'm not a bad person.
Yeah, that's the thing.
And, but apparently, I guess there's one of the use cases of this is to,
if you
You can spend off
Infidelity yeah by flirting with a VR hotty it says might help people avoid cheating
I guess cuz you get that kind of fix wait, so it's a bot you're flirting with I don't know now
You go into a VR and talk to an attractive bartender and the study found that
The people who were using it found that they were less likely to cheat because it did activate that, like,
ooh, I went in there and got that out of my system.
And you can ask the bartender, like,
would you fuck me to save a million people's lives?
And the bartender was like, no, it's never ethical,
the fuck you.
Kinda like chat GPT style.
And you just bail,
because you realize that VR is super liberal.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Too woke.
Too woke.
Is it a real bartender? I think it's a VR, I think liberal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To woke. To woke. Is it a real bartender?
I think it's a VR, I think it's a, yeah, it's,
what is it a real person?
It's like a real person.
On the other hand.
That's a good question.
Talking to you.
It better be.
I don't know if it's a real person.
It's probably, yeah.
A VR bartender of the same gender
of their real life romantic partner
who either behaved flirtatiously or neutrally.
Yeah, but it doesn't say if it's a,
it doesn't say.
Oh yeah, a VR bait a
Virtual seductive virtual agent
Yeah, oh they're repaired with attractive interviewers following their VR. What the fuck man
Sounds like the VR bartender is a real person. Yeah, I think so that's a cool headline smearing testosterone on men makes them into horny beasts
Scientists find now that's true. That's true. Yeah. How do you, wait, there's a lick, there's like a testosterone that you can, yeah, I've got a, you don't see me here.
No, I should, I should, I should,
I should smear every morning, really.
You wanna be a horny beast, yeah?
I mean, I'm already a horny beast, but.
You should definitely smear at least once a day.
Literally smeering testosterone onto the skin
of young straight, they're already unbelievably horny.
What are you talking about? Yeah, they put it on 13. How do you attribute it to the skin of young street. They're already unbelievably horny. What are you talking about?
Yeah, they put it on 13.
How do you attribute it to the picture?
It's already beast.
Look at this kid, he's horny.
It's on my day of beast.
It reminds me of that tweet that you retweeted
where it's like watching Sex in the City,
whenever this one appears, I just walk around like a big...
Like a jungle cat? Yeah.
Yeah, so now I think of like a horny jungle cat just walking around.
Pacing.
Oh, I love this sentence.
Testosterone is a hormone that plays a key role in libido.
What?
By the way, what is this website?
Otherwise, healthy man found to be allergic to his own orgasms.
Is this like clickbait.com?
This is fucking stupid.
I don't know.
This is neo-scope baby.
It's not-
It's from futurism futurism.com.
I've never heard of this website.
I hate when they write about me.
You can't be allergic to your own orgasm.
Shut up.
This is the horniest website.
It's crazy.
Yeah, scientists create drug that makes patients super horny.
Every headline is like, I'm talking.
I'm talking.
Wait, dick bills.
No, oh god. God, there's so many dick things I don't like. What the other one? Yeah, tuck it! Wait, dick pills, no! Oh, god, god, there's so many dick pills in the other one.
Yeah, go back, what was that other one?
Dick pills maybe linked to lowered risk of heart attack.
It's like they're just trying to get everyone to fuck.
Like birthright.
Is that what happens on birthright?
Yeah, you guys, hey, you guys, you're all together?
Yeah. They want you to fuck? Yeah. Aren't you like young on birthright? They, you guys, hey, you guys, you're all together. Yeah.
They want you to fuck.
Yeah.
Aren't you like young on birthright?
Encourages just to not use condoms.
Yeah, they want you to do it.
I'm serious.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it.
They want you to do it. They want you to do it. They want you to do it. They want you to do it. They want you to do it. Men are Jews. Wait, what is scientists created for you? I don't get this book.
Well, if it was this one,
it would say three out of every four men are Jewish,
horny, man.
Yeah, well, that's true.
I like to say that out of every group of like 40 or 50 Jews,
Jewish young kids, careful.
There's a girl who thinks she can sing, but she can't.
There's a girl who can sing, but she won't.
But she won't.
And then there's the guy who can sing, but she won't. But she won't.
And then there's the guy who loves to give everybody massages.
I feel like that's maybe in every group of people.
And then there's just 47 randoms who don't.
And then the other ones?
And then all the other ones.
You're just describing, there's some really rich kids
and some really dirt poor kids.
It sounds like you're just describing like a theater group.
I'm just describing my bar mitzvah class.
Yeah, that's right. There were the dirt poor kids who could not afford to have a party
So the temple just like through or your party. You do have grinding trains where it was guy girl guy girl guy girl
All across the dance floor where they just like sway back and forth in front of all the parents seven up and shit
Oh, you played seven up at your bar mitzvah. Yeah, man. It was like to what two it was like 1999 or 2000 or
You could party there was a famous song party like it's actually it was 2000 was pre 9 11
Wow, because I was 13 when you were still allowed to dance and you had everyone say okay, put your head down
Any sum up no no no seven up was a different game. That's heads up seven up dip shit
What the fuck this is one where you're both on either side of the dance floor
And I think the kid with the microphone says like you I don't remember man
It's been a long time since I've been 13. Did you have a bar mitzvah theme? Yeah, it was cars
Well not the Disney movie that wouldn't come out for a long time. What were your guys bar mitzvah themes?
Red, white, and blue
After 9-11 and you said the terrorists won't win. Yeah, yeah, it fell
on Memorial Day, so everything was a red, white, and blue. That's wholesome. What was
you? I didn't have a moment. You didn't. I'm Jewish, but I didn't do anything. Got you. Yeah.
I'm Jewish and I still don't do anything anymore. I should. I miss it. Damn. I got my first blowjob on
Yom Kippur. Oh, holy a stay of the year. Yeah. Oh, she's the most fast.
That's correct. That's that woman is the lord. She's a bad person. She's a
lord. She made it. She's not a bad person. Although, uh, not it was like terrible
and, you know,
nothing.
It didn't finish or anything.
Right, so she could fast, though.
She still, she did not break her fast, technically.
And then all my friends were calling me blue balls
and I didn't understand what it meant,
but I knew that it was bad
because they wouldn't tell me what it meant
because they were like,
you don't know, oh, oh, oh, so then they leaned into it more.
And then when the services were over
and we're all standing around with our parents,
they kept calling me blue balls
and I was embarrassed and I thought,
well, my parents don't know what to do.
Did this happen at Temple or something?
Yeah, really?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, in the Temple?
No, well, because our congregation was so big
for the high holy day services,
we would go to Cal State Long Beach
where they had a much better job.
And did you smear testosterone yourself that more?
No, I should have.
Probably would have made it easier to achieve.
Did you do it your subway tune up breakfast sandwich?
No, I missed it that morning.
That explains why you didn't come.
Yeah.
Did you ever like romantically hang out with her again?
No, never.
Just one blowjob was the extent of your hook up.
Yeah.
We were well, that's straight.
I don't remember 14, 15.
That was in high school.
Yeah.
And you guys had never done anything.
You were just like, hey, want to suck me off a temple?
I don't, I do.
I want that out.
It wasn't a temple.
It was at the John and Karen Carpenter Center at the KELSE.
Want to suck me off of the John and Karen Carpenter Center?
Yeah, how did this happen?
How did this happen?
I'm curious.
I think some other friends were hooking up and they were like, Hey Danielle. Hey, man, you guys should because we were like the only ones not doing anything.
What's your last name? I'm not saying that here. She but she yeah, okay. Let's move on.
I like this story. Cool. Yeah. It's a cool story.
Get her on the pot. We'd love to kind of follow up because she's a lawyer she probably remembers
Yeah, I'm sure it's a good memory. They got to remember the details. It's their whole job
She probably does remember. Yeah
In fact, I think I did see her at a party sometime later and she was like oh, I was like goo
She was like blue balls bad. Yeah, she calls you goo
Surprising actually Blue balls ban! Yeah, she calls you goo. Surprise, actually, honestly.
Man.
Well, speaking of China, you guys ever, you guys ever use
Alibaba?
What's that?
It's like their Amazon, right?
Yeah.
But it's way jankier.
Yeah, I have not used it.
Yeah, because you can buy all sorts of shit.
But apparently you can buy drones, like full on
attack drones for 1.9.
What, what a currency is that?
Yen?
That might be a good deal.
Actually, you're right.
Yeah, you can buy, you can-
Where's your get a drone?
Where's your get a drone for the show?
I would buy an attack drone and then-
Yeah, like for these.
And then return it.
$1,000.
Yeah, wow, $17,000.
That's a steel.
From medium altitude and long endurance unmanned area of the vehicle for strike reconnaissance and surveillance
That's a steel would it deliver itself? That's a good question
That's a good question. Yeah, but you know what it is they get you you got to buy the missile separate problems
Oh, yeah, I wonder if it comes with any bullets
Like if there's a cuz usually they have a yeah, I don't know what else do they have for sale in there?
There's like a
747 now that now we're talking Hmm, I don't know. What else do they have for sale on there? There's like a
747 now that now we're talking that's 49 mil 49 and a half million for 747 400 get the fuck out of here
Is that too much? What's the going rate? I don't know, but that seems like a bargain to me. That's a good deal
Yeah, how many what do they call that?
Cycles has it run through. I wonder if they have that detail the lead time is only five days
Damn, if that have that detail. The lead time is only five days. Pretty quick.
Damn.
Is that delivery itself?
What?
Let's see, what are some of the details?
Like, how many flight cycles has it been?
There are other airplanes for sale in there?
It's, oh wow.
Wow.
Wow.
There are 100% on time delivery.
You buy it.
That is cool. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, it. Wait, wait, wait, wait, here we go. Here we go. Product configure rate.
I don't want the configuration.
I want to know how many times it's flown.
What the hours are.
Well, whatever.
Maybe it's new.
No, it's not.
It's a 747-400.
They're all the way up to the 800 and 900 now.
Could you identify a plane in the sky?
Yeah.
Yeah, he does it all the time.
Well, you're a plane nerd?
Yeah.
Why?
That's a price.
One time I sent him a picture of me sitting in a seat
in a plane to be like, hey, look, I'm on my way home.
And he just went, 737.
And I was like, okay.
No, I didn't.
You 100% did.
And I was shocked.
There was like, what airline were you flying?
I have no idea, but I was like,
how the fuck did he nail it from my seat?
What's your favorite plane to fly in?
Triple seven.
Why?
Because it's huge.
I like a 787 Dreamliner. Are you like those? Yeah, I flown in one once. What's your favorite plan to fly on? Triple seven. Why? Because it's huge.
I like a 787 dreamliner.
You like those?
Uh, yeah, I flown in one once.
You know what I hate?
737 max.
Fuck that plane.
Why?
Because they tried to cram in so many seats.
There are only two bathrooms,
and they're all the way at the back of the plane,
and they made the galley for the flight attendance tiny.
So it's just constantly, flight attendant's going,
excuse me, excuse me, trying to get through, trying to get by,
and then there's, because there's no room to stand back there,
there's just a line of people.
So if you're in one of the final 10 rows as I was,
you constantly have some idiot standing there waiting to piss.
How do you know he's an idiot? Maybe just have to take a piss.
Anyone who has to piss isn't it.
Anyone who has to piss isn't it. Anyone who has to face it.
Keep it in.
Fuck it more.
If you haven't discovered how to skirt evolution in that way,
keep it in.
Yeah, bring a piss bag.
I'm no waste.
I'm a no waste guy.
You just reabsorb it.
I reabsorb it all?
Yeah, why not?
I'm 100% efficiency.
Piss into a cup and drink it.
Yeah.
Well, man, I'm just the king of transitions today.
Do you have another one?
You can do it.
Let's see, how do I get that one?
Idiots having to piss on an airplane.
Who gives a shit?
You ever piss in a cracker barrel?
No, I've actually never been to a cracker barrel.
You never bit, is it more Eastern thing?
Do they not have them out here?
They, I think probably out in like the Inland Empire,
probably.
Yeah, it seems like a racist thing
against white people to call it that,
but I guess it's fine.
White people love it.
Yeah, they do, they do be loving cracker barrel.
But they announced this thing for Valentine's Day
and it just makes me feel gross where if you get engaged at a cracker barrel
and post about it on social media and
Use the hashtag we fell in love or whatever at cracker barrel you could win
Free cracker bail for a year
Yeah, we should get gay engaged at Cracket Brawl.
Why not just regular engaged?
Cause we'd be gay.
Some would say being gay is regular.
That's true. That's what Ben is pointing out.
That is a very good point.
Well, it's crazy about this.
It seems like what just happened?
We just have an earthquake.
I didn't feel it.
Oh, okay, nevermind.
It seems like five couples will win this.
So everyone else who does it just doesn't win.
So there's gonna be X number of couples who do it
and don't get anything from it.
Yes, there's gonna be a ton of people
who post a really pathetic sad video of them
getting engaged with Carrejo Rowling
and posting it on Instagram.
They don't say anything about whether you got to follow
through and get married.
That's what I was gonna say.
How do they, how can they, man, I like the way the way you think yeah exactly why I was saying we should get regular engaged
That's what they want
Learning like even they want even people to do it as jokes. Yeah, probably I don't say there's zero prize
That you could get me where I would post a picture of myself the cracker barrel period not let alone getting engaged
Yeah, I just think I don't think I'm ever gonna
pose the picture up myself there.
I would go to a Cracker Barrel.
I bet they got really good.
I bet that's the type of place
where they got really good like Apple Butter and biscuits.
They, it's like biscuits is a huge part of their entire
line. Are you lying or are you telling the truth?
No, no, no, it's, they're obsessed with biscuits.
Really? Yeah, like, what is a cracker barrel?
It's very heavy breakfast food
and for when you're on the road and so on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I bet, oh God, can you,
I bet the bathrooms in those places are just,
no, and a big part of the thing is
they have these chinchy gift stores.
Everyone's sued.
Can you not say chinchy?
What's chinchy?
Is that bad?
I don't know, it sounds dude. I don't know, though. Maybe it's good.
Enough with the slurs.
Chinsy, who would that even be?
Oh, jeez, he said it again.
Gosh, dude.
We have chinsy, now you got me saying it.
Oh, no. Everyone loves the gift stores.
Yeah.
It's like part of the whole experience.
I thought they sold furniture.
No, that you're thinking of a Cosplus World market, which is a very confusing place.
Never heard of that in my life. Cosplus Worldizing. You're thinking of Cosplus World. Have you ever
been to a Cosplus World market? No. It's worth it. Weird. It's like a grocery store kind of
and furniture.
They sell like jams and buttermilk.
I never know. Go out and fucking come back anywhere.
They got plenty of them probably or the valley.
And I gotta say a lot of the employees working there.
They're a little chinsy.
Yeah, they come back a little chinsy.
Oh, I was thinking of cracking back.
We're gonna have the Google, before we eat.
Chinsy, I think you're thinking of, uh, uh, oh man.
Kitchie.
No, Chinsy is like, fucking, you keep saying you're just digging.
I think it's okay.
I think it's okay.
I'm just being facetious.
You can't say that.
Yeah, it means, it means, uh, yeah, there you go.
It means of, uh, of cheap enough pork balls.
Yeah, it's fucking perfect. Yeah, but it does they of like our decorate with chints and what's that mean?
I don't love that. That's the British. That's the British definition. What is that? Click chints click chints, please. Oh
It's bad. It's bad. We can't say printed multi-colored cotton fabric. Okay. It's a package. It's man. You British. What the fuck?
It's covered in chains. Oh, there's a whole place. It's a place is covered in chains. It's man you British what the fuck? It's covered in chin's oh place
So please is covering chin's
It's very chinsay
Is it man cuz
Say shiv
Shiv why like you like Tom
Shiv yeah, yeah, I can't wait for that new season
Wait, I was thinking of Creighton barrel
Creighton barrel yeah I can't wait for that new season. Yeah. Wait, I was thinking of Crate and Barrel. Crate and Barrel, yeah.
That's cracker, man.
Oh, very different.
Way more upscale.
Yeah.
I hate all those fucking furniture.
Why, tell me.
Because they have the same,
you will find something at CB2,
which is their more expensive one.
Oh, I was just like the modern one.
Yeah, for whatever.
But you will see something that's for $400 and it's got its name and then you can see like the same thing on
Wayfair for half the price, but it's like maybe not the same thing. I just hate all
the quality. Yeah, just just copying designs. Damn it. Because I know what I'm
going to get. Ben's like, I don't like when there are cheaper versions of something.
Yeah, but it's one of those things. I just don't trust anything. I don't trust bigger purchases online.
For someone who has something from like
Creighton Barrow or West Down or whatever.
And then...
Yeah, West Down's another.
And then bought something off of Wayfair?
It's way different.
Yeah.
Wayfair is one of the most hated stocks on the market.
They got shorted into a boobian.
Really?
Yeah, from like 300 bucks to share down to like 10.
Why?
Cause they, they, they, I don't know,
there's been controversy that they,
the way they count, they got too much inventory, I think.
Oh, I was wrong, it was, it do max.
Please.
Oh yeah, she went up to,
look at how the fucking fuck,
it was one of those big pandemic stocks. Yeah, it kind of makes sense for them
Everyone trying to remodel and staying home. Yeah, well, you know what one did really Bukku numbers was
I'd never say that yeah, sorry about that. Wait is Bukku bad? No, Bukku is good
It's a lot, but it's the one that's really expensive
That's escaping me. Does that within reach no really it like higher end home pottery bomb home
Home, oh, I know you're talking about restoration hardware restoration. Oh, yeah, whoo then that magazine
It's like that. They're it's like a book. They're yeah, yeah, they're ticker symbol as our age
Let's see where they're at it did really well for a hot minute
But oh wow to 319 dollars a share what can you do do to the, I guess all, yeah.
Their stuff is, you would be pissed.
You ever walked into one of those stores?
You look at anything in there, you go, how the,
this is a great share.
It's probably like $900, $10,000.
Yeah, it had a high of like 700 bucks,
and now it's back to like two, three, 20.
Eh, who gives a shit?
Restoration hardware, not us guys, right? I would never buy a phone. I would like, who gives a shit? Restoration hardware.
Not us guys, right?
I would like, there was a recliner that I wanted,
and I was gonna spring the thousand bucks
or something for it,
because I thought, this is the last meme my whole life.
It's called like the Winston Churchill chair.
But also, if you're not in a rush,
right, if you don't have to furnish your-
I'm always in a rush.
Well, if you don't have to furnish your place immediately,
right, fucking Facebook marketplace craigslist,
you can say you get bed bugs.
I don't trust that.
I need a chair?
That's the charm of it.
Yeah, in a leather chair?
I know people's asses have been all over that chair.
That is the charm of it too.
I have the same leather couch as my friend
and he's had his much longer and I'm like,
I wish I got this thing used.
It's so worn, it looks fucking beautiful. Mine's new, it looks like shit. Well, you gotta wear it out, man. I'm trying, how much is my friend and he's had his much longer? And I'm like, I wish I got this thing used. It's so worn, it looks fucking beautiful.
Mine's new, it looks like shit.
Well, you gotta wear it out, man.
I'm trying, everything is done.
I'll come over.
Come sit on it.
Yeah.
I'd love it if you guys did that.
Yeah.
Where's that couch from?
I hate myself, I hate it.
Wow.
I hate it.
Where'd you get it?
I got it.
I bought it from the woman who lived in the apartment before.
What about her ass?
Was it all over it?
Well, you bring a good point.
Jesus.
Man, I am really inconsistent in my beliefs, definitely true.
Well, I was gonna say I didn't know her.
I didn't know her like I would know if I didn't...
I don't know people on Facebook, but I also didn't know her.
What, she just knocked on your door.
I was like, you want this fucking couch?
I know. I got to check out the apartment. the landlord was like, well, if you want, you
can buy a bunch of furniture from my daughter because she's moving out. It was her daughter,
his daughter. And I just said, yeah, I need some shit. So why not? And I get a new couch.
Treat yourself. I know. But the problem is, they're expensive. He told me that the way that they had
to get it in was through the window. And I'm on the second floor. So I'm like, okay, I don't want
to have to. Oh, yeah, that's there. Well, floor. So I'm like, okay, I don't want to have to do it.
Oh yeah, that's there while there's a fucking nightmare.
Yeah, there's no way they'd be able to get it through there.
Yeah, I could do it.
You probably could.
Me and you could probably just do it together.
We could probably just do it.
We could probably just do it.
Are your listeners gonna be mad at us
that we're detracting you guys from finance?
No, no, they're gonna be so stoked you guys are on.
Yeah.
I think we've asked people who they want on and they said you guys get the pop, get the pop,
they did actually get the pop out of that guy's got that. But people do we want to enter in cold.
When we had Garrett Watson, there were a couple of people who were like, you guys didn't even talk
about finances this week. You didn't even do it. Like, shut up. We know, man, take a breather. We
are allowed to do that. Yeah.
But almost the time we talked about some fun,
we talked about Subway.
We talked about AMC.
AMC.
We talked about Ali Baba.
We talked about the Facebook.
Cracker Girl.
We talked about which religion is correct.
Oh no, we cut that.
We cut that.
Oh yeah, but we did for a while talk about
which religion was correct.
Yeah, we did.
We're gonna cut that.
We're cutting that whole hour.
A whole hour, yeah.
Well, it was a good debate. Yeah Yeah. We got the answer. Yeah.
Yeah. And there were a lot of slurs.
Yeah.
But you know, if you thought Chinsy was bad, let's just say, we cover.
Do you guys ever get people going like, Oh, we want you to do more of this thing?
And you never do that thing anymore? No, because our show is just so random.
It's just like, Oh, right. You kind of never know what you're going're, I mean, we can't plan at all. We truly just sit there and then
people walk by and random people sit down and sometimes we have like somewhat of a theme
depending on which location we're at, but it's, it's, it's very hard to like maintain
a solid structure because it is just. So was this guy's plan to come in his pants if he
came to, yeah, that was his plan and we were trying to get consent from the audience and it was a whole thing.
Well, so you will have to tune in to podcasts but outside to see the riveting conclusion
of the follow up.
Yeah, follow up.
Yeah, so we will post clips from that.
That'll be on our media for sure.
Yeah, I can't wait to see it.
In conclusion, why don't you give yourselves a plug.
Okay.
All right.
My name is Cole Hirsch.
I live.
Go for it.
My name is Andrew Mishon.
I'm six foot two.
Yeah, I'm on Instagram and Twitter.
And then our podcast is podcast but outside.
And you can follow it on Instagram and talk on Twitter.
And there's like one minute clips.
You don't have to watch a full hour of the show
to see some of the really weird crazy people you do.
Talk to you over the years.
Check out the full show on YouTube and podcast apps.
It's free and it's fun.
And every week we had a new location with lots of different guests.
We had them on this week.
We've had past celebrities.
We've had, you know, Noel Miller was on in the fall last year.
We're going on tour too.
Going on tour.
So if you want to see potential strangers cream their jeans on stage.
Yeah.
Our life show is the most fun thing we do.
And there's limited tickets available.
We truly have like very few tickets left.
Are you guys should do unlimited?
What do you think?
Well, we're almost sold out with a lot of our shows.
Streaming online?
No, we can't do that.
Are you guys doing a bunch of shows?
Like, like in the next couple months,
we have like maybe eight shows or something.
Holy shit.
And maybe 10, very cool.
We're on the country and Canada.
You should talk to whatever that company
is it does live streaming.
I know, we're truly like we're truly like,
when we're on the road, it's like we have a show every,
every other night in different cities.
It's just kind of difficult.
But we're gonna be in New York with Joe Pera,
and we're gonna be in Boston, Chicago,
Toronto is sold out, and we're gonna be in Austin, Texas,
Vancouver, I don't know, all that stuff.
Very cool.
Damn, go get your tickets.
Yeah, go get your tickets.
Go get your tickets.
Well, they're still available.
Thanks for having us, guys. This was really fun. Thanks for coming got your tickets. Look at your tics. Well, they're still available. Thanks for having us guys.
This was really fun.
Thanks for coming on the show.
Learned a lot.
Thank you for having us on yours.
And I'm glad we got to finally do this.
Yeah.
Great.
Don't forget, follow Andrew on Instagram.
It's at Andrew Mishon.
And I am at Andrew Mishon one.
Is that you?
Mm-hmm.
Okay, cool.
You're starting like a competing business.
Yeah.
I like that.
That's a good idea. Yeah. that's a good idea. That's good
Well, don't forget to follow Ben on Instagram at Bencon
Yeah, I already do I like it cool muted. I follow
Hardcore muted. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you follow me. I follow you. Yeah, okay. I follow you. I comment it on your post this one
I know. Thank you. Yeah, I didn't see you made me a little embarrassed, but it was okay. Oh, really? No, I just, well, yeah, it was a weird time to post.
Okay, well, come here.
Well, he posted, it was the first thing I saw when I woke up
and he posted a photo and I said,
I just commented 7am grid post.
Oh, yeah.
It was a little weird.
My friend sent me,
whoa.
My friend sent me a picture.
I was like, I like this picture.
I'll just post it.
Yeah.
I woke up and saw it and I was like,
Dude, somebody get Emile the embarrassment hat off of my head.
Yeah.
I put it on his head.
When's the cool time to post?
I didn't mean to embarrass you.
No, no. It was...
There's no cool time.
It made me laugh.
I post it 10 a.m. 2 p.m. and 8 p.m. every day.
That's the good time to post.
Yeah, that's the time to do it.
There you go. There's your answer.
I post it like once a month.
Alright, well look out for me. 10 a.m. 2 p.m. and 1 a.m. every day.
Well folks, we love you very much.
Yes we do.
Thank you for having us.
Bye.
This week on After Hours.
I'd be unstoppable if I had better fashion sense.
Unstoppable in one sense, like drowning in pussy.
Buddy, I know how to swim.
No, I'm not that much pussy.
Man, can you imagine if a bird told you to build a bomb?
The birds keep me from making bombs. They tell me to, but I don't listen to them. I'd be No, but that much pussy. Man, can you imagine if a bird told you to build a bomb? The birds keep me from making bombs.
They tell me to, but I don't listen to them.
I'd be like, I gotta do it.
There's no reason this bird is talking to me.
Isn't that what must be divine?
Wasn't that the son of Sam think the dog was telling the dog?
Yeah, yeah, and he was right.
He was following his heart.
And that's what being an adult is all about.
Following your heart, listening to a dog.
Gaslighting your wife.
Throw up.
It was right.
I'm going to throw up. Yeah, we got to grow up.
Right?
This is going to be a very grown up episode.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Woo-hoo-hoo!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha