The Unmade Podcast - 138: A Million Seconds of Podcasting

Episode Date: February 8, 2024

Tim and Brady discuss naps, delicious Shapes, the Million Dollar Podcast, Sofa Shop addiction, a birthday spoon, and bursting bubbles.Here’s The Million Dollar Podcast - https://www.unmade.fm/million-dollar-podcastSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/unmadeFMJoin the discussion of this episode on our subreddit - https://redd.it/1am39pjThis week’s extra Request Room is really good (both funny and serious) - https://www.patreon.com/posts/98081303Catch the podcast on YouTube where we often include accompanying videos and pictures - https://www.youtube.com/@unmadepodcastUSEFUL LINKSShapes by Arnotts - https://www.arnotts.com/brands/shapesThe original Million Dollar Homepage - http://www.milliondollarhomepage.com/And here’s our Million Dollar Podcast - https://www.unmade.fm/million-dollar-podcastReddit Place - https://www.reddit.com/r/place/Our channel of Sofa Shop covers - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRNeH_Kpl1ZgpeiNeJ-oiAQPictures of Spoon of the Week - https://www.unmade.fm/spoon-of-the-weekFaroe Islands - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faroe_IslandsPictures from this episode, including the billboard and Cheers set - https://www.unmade.fm/episode-138-picturesBrady’s Risk video on Numberphile - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdooKXXcWWcCatch the bonus Request Room episode - https://www.patreon.com/posts/98081303Information about getting the Request Room into your podcast feed (for patrons) - https://bit.ly/3uQWhNz

How's your health, by the way, after the hospital drama of the last episode? You back to full strength? Oh, yes. No, I'm doing very well indeed. Yes, no, feeling good. No more surfing mishaps, if you can call forgetting to put on sunscreen a mishap? No, I know. It's a bit of a rookie mistake, isn't it?

You drill it into the children and then forget it yourself. I'm feeling pretty good. It may be because I had a post-work nap, which is a very rare occasion. But I came home exhausted, had a nap, then we went for dinner, and then now here I am, and I feel fantastic. I find naps kill me. I find naps are like my kryptonite. They don't- they're not good for me. No.

They ruin my whole day. Often they're because they go too long. I find if you sleep too long, it ruins everything and you wake up lost and groggy. But what's the point of a nap if it's not long? Because it can be energising. Apparently there's a rule like 23 minutes or something is like the perfect nap. 23 minutes is the perfect shower. I don't agree it's the perfect nap. apparently there is some science in it do you do you set a timer no no no but i have a wife who she said look go we were just laying there going oh and she says look have a nap i'll wake you up shortly i actually don't know what the time was but i think in her mind since she's heard this

fact she's holding to it so shortly means you, in 23 minutes or 27 minutes or whatever it is. Anyway, shortly is the new measurement. Yeah. And, yeah, she did. Yeah. Yep. And it's worked. I was like, you do wake up and you go, it's like everything's impossible.

It's like, what is going on? What? Where? Who am I? Yeah. And then it's just sort of like, oh, okay. Yeah. Now I can see how that could work. All right. We'll go for dinner. And then I got there and it of like, oh, okay, yeah, now I can see how that could work.

All right, we'll go for dinner. And then I got there and it's like, oh, yeah, no, this is nice. Oh, I've got the podcast. Oh, I'm actually re-energised. So as long as – basically what I'm saying is as long as my wife is, like, controlling or overseeing the nap, it can be successful. the nap, it can be successful. Actually, speaking of your hospital visit, we referenced and we joked a little bit about the fact that before your hospital visit, you had been eating barbecue shapes. And this is an Australian delicacy. Oh, yeah. And we had someone get in touch saying

they didn't know what barbecue shapes were and they looked them up. And I did an annotator or footnoter in our famous annotation episode. So, I thought I would just explain to people what a barbecue shape is. Tim, why don't you explain what a barbecue shape is? Oh, they are wonderful. Like, I don't have a sweet tooth, but I love these sorts of savoury things. And they're not, they're not, they're somewhere between if you've got like a cookie and then you've got chips. And it's not that.

I would call it like a cracker, a very small cracker. Oh, good work. Yes, that's right. Yep. With heavy flavouring. Yeah, the size of a cracker, a baked cracker, the size of, I'd say, a very big coin. And it's dusted with a kind of seasoning that gives it a barbecue flavour, allegedly. But it's sort of just sort of saltiness and herbs and stuff.

So it's got this kind of this powdering across it. Are they hexagons or octagons? I think they're hexagons, hence the shape. I think they are. Yes, hexagons. And they, in fact, if I didn't know that that i could put one on my tongue and my tongue would remember the shape because you sort of feel it in your mouth over and over you swing it around look they are there are a bunch of flavors they're like pizza flavored and the i think there's like

well this is an important point to make because because the correspondent wrote i don't understand why they're called shapes when they're all the same shape. And that is because there is a whole line. We'd have the pizza shape, which is a different shape. My favourite, the savoury shape. So are you saying they're different shapes, they're different flavours, are they? Yeah, quite. Yes. I've never noticed that.

That's great. Here's you bragging about your tongue being able to tell the shapes of. Well, I only eat the barbecue ones. I only eat the barbecue ones. I never eat the others. But you're right. The pizza ones are triangles or something, aren't they? No.

I think the pizza ones are also, funnily enough, hexagons, but not regular hexagons, whereas the barbecue shape is a regular hexagon. Now, I've got to look them up now. I've never thought about that. They're different shapes. Barbecue shape. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Barbecue shape. There we go. That's definitely a hexagon. Let me look up the pizza shape. They're by a company called Arnott's, I think, aren't they? Yeah. Is that a hexagon? Yeah, it is, but it's more elongated.

Right. The savoury shape, which I sometimes even order to the uk i love them so much they they do come in multiple shapes i think they come in triangles yeah they come in multiple shapes the savory shapes what else what other shapes are there hang on here's a bit there's some new ones have come out since my time the chicken crimpy chicken yeah yeah no that is a part of the shape collection. They're pretty tasty. Actually. I remember when the pizza ones came out,

they only came out in the nineties. There's another one called the cheddar. All these other ones though. I never, I never get. And when, look, I worked in a supermarket in food land,

if you remember, and when you've got the, when you're stocking the shelves, there's like one shelf for all the flavours and one shelf for the barbecue shapes. So, they're clearly the most popular. Yeah. All the others have as much room on the shelf as the barbecues do, like they do combined.

Yeah. The barbecue shapes just are fantastic. They're so yummy. I don't like it. I don't like all that powder. Oh, I love the powder. I lick my fingers and like dab out the powder at the bottom afterwards. That's all great.

That's all collected in the bottom of the plastic bag. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's some hardcore saltiness, that is. Oh, yeah, yeah. Then I roll up a dollar note and sniff it. Lines of barbecue-shaped seasoning. It is addictive. No, I'm just saying.

Where do you stand on the savoury shape? My preferred shape. I have no- I can't bring it to mind. I can't remember having it. I'm sure I have at some stage. I have no feeling whatsoever. I'm going to say it, man. Try the savoury shape.

It's a game changer. All right. I'll try it. I'll try it and report back in parish notices. All right. One of the less crucial parish notices. But these barbecue shapes are fantastic. Like, I'll sit down and watch a game of footy.

I can eat all of them. Or they're particularly good for a road trip. Driving along, grab a handful, you know, and munch on them that way. Yeah. Fantastic. Camping, good thing to throw in for camping as well. They don't feel particularly unhealthy as well because- No.

I don't know. I'm sure they're not. Oh, yeah. I'm sure they're up there with KFC. I'm sure for- No, they they're up there with KFC. I'm sure for – No, they're not up there with KFC. If you can order them from wherever you are in the world, give it a go. In fact, I went into a meeting with my boss yesterday,

and it was late in the day, and I hadn't eaten a proper lunch. I said, have we got any bickies around here to have while we meet? With my cup of coffee, and he sort of took me to the stash where they pull them out for, you know, group meetings and so forth. And in there, there was chocolates and there was all sorts of like Tim Tams and amazing biscuits and so forth. And I reached past everything because I saw a little pack of a fun-sized pack of barbecue shapes and I grabbed one of them.

Yeah. Australian people or anyone who can access some shapes, I want you to rate in order the barbecue shapes, savoury shapes, pizza shapes and the chicken crimpy because I think they're the four cardinal shapes. Right. For me. Yeah. So those four shapes, you can throw in other ones if you want, but I want you to try all

four of those shapes before the next episode and rank them in order. Did you say pizza? The pizza, the barbecue, the chicken crimpy and the savoury. Those four. If you want to throw in some more, you can, but those four are the four I want rated in order. There's actually a Vegemite flavour one now, but this is- Yeah, that's crap. One thing I have noticed about Australia, particularly-

I know this happens all around the world. It happens in the UK, it happens in America, but Australians go crazy for it. And that's these crossovers between different flavours and different brands. So, you'll get like, you know, Vegemite flavoured Tim Tams and all that sort of stuff. Australians love a good crossover, flavour crossover and brand crossover. Well, I reckon it's stupid Australian marketing people like to do that. I don't think real Australians do that. I think we like to have our Vegemite on toast, as Vegemite is.

And this, I mean, there was like a Vegemite and cheese kind of thing going around for a while. No, I found that when last time I was in Australia at the supermarket aisles, I was amazed by how many of my childhood iconic flavours were now merged with other flavours in brands and, like, they're all these weird crossovers between my favourite chocolate bars and my favourite drinks and all this sort of stuff. And they put, like, because I think there's, like, a Tim Tam ice cream.

You know, they take something that's, like, a thing in itself. Yeah, they love it with an ice cream. With an ice cream. You know, they take something that's like a thing in itself. Yeah, they love it with an ice cream. With an ice cream, yeah, yeah. Which is just- I love merging an ice cream with a flavour or another brand. Anyway, anyway. Yeah, want to hear about your shapes. But let's get to ideas for a podcast because I'm about to drop a bit of a bomb.

This is a podcast idea I've been sitting on since day one. This has been on my list since before we even started the podcast. Wow. And I haven't done it until now. And not because I don't think it's a good idea, but just because I was a bit intimidated by it. And I also felt like I couldn't announce the idea without actually executing the idea as well. So, it's my intention to sort of semi-execute it on the side so people can sort of see what it's like and how it works and things like that.

Right, right, right. This is intriguing. It's big. It's a big vision. I'm not going to execute it to its full fruition because that would- I'm not capable of doing it, but also I don't think it's feasible. But I am going to sort of launch it as a real thing to sort of see how it works and what it's like or what it would have been like.

It's not one of your meta ones, is it? Where you like reinvent podcasting in a different way and, you know, have like a- It's a bit like- It's the Vegemite Tim Tam podcast combination, like, you know what I mean? Like where you try and come up with a whole new way of podcasting. It kind of is, maybe. Right. Maybe I'm a bit guilty of that.

Yeah, maybe a bit. You tell me. But I may be guilty as charged there. So, this idea is called The Million Dollar Podcast. Right. That's a cool name, hey? Well, it sounds more like a reality, like a quiz show, a TV quiz show at the moment. All right.

Well, it's not. It's not. Do you remember in, I believe it was 2005, this will either test your memory or I'll be telling you about something new, something called the Million Dollar Homepage. No. I'll send it to you because it still exists so you can look at it and then we will discuss it. Did we have homepages in 2005? Some people will remember this, some will not.

Basically, what happened was a young guy called Alex Chew from the UK wanted to go to the University of Nottingham, funnily enough, a university I have a lot of links with, and he wanted to raise some money for himself. And he had this idea. And basically, what he did was he created a webpage, a website, and it had an image on it that was a thousand pixels by a thousand pixels. So, a million pixels. Right. Which isn't as big as you think. It's about the size of your computer screen. And he basically sold each pixel for a dollar. So, he was going to make a size of your computer screen. And he basically sold each pixel for a dollar. So he was going to make a million dollars from this thing. And you would buy them in batches

of 10 or 20 or, you know, you would buy a shape like a square or a rectangle. You'd buy a certain number of pixels in this big grid that were then your pixels. You could do what you want with them. You could make a little image, you know, like a pretty rudimentary image just using like, you know, 10 by 10 pixels or 50 by 100 pixels or however many pixels you bought. Right. You could buy a little piece of real estate on his page. And it became this viral sensation. And he sold them all and he actually made his million dollars. And if you have a look at the page now, it still exists.

You can sort of see how it turned out. Have you got it there? It's just come up, yep. Yeah, okay, right. Tell people what you see, Tim, for those who have not seen this. Oh, well, it's a very dense patchwork really. It's like it has a ye olde website sort of framing around it and up the top but then it's-

I mean, it's an absolute mess. Yes, total- A ton of salt on your senses because it's. I mean, it's an absolute mess. Yes. A total salt on your senses. Absolutely. Because it's completely disparate. And basically it turned into a bit of an advertising thing, really. People were just buying it for, because it was getting a lot of attention, people were just buying it for ads. And they just put a little icon or something to try and grab people's attention on there. Yeah.

Because you could link off your pixels to your website. Oh, you can too. Yeah. If I scroll over it. Yeah. So, it's too, yeah, if I scroll over it. Yeah. So, it's this absolute mess of a webpage, but it was really interesting. And it's really- and you can zoom in and look at it and who did what. And some people did quite creative, clever things.

Everyone's trying to get attention. And it's kind of like thousands of people all screaming at you for attention at the same time. Yeah, yeah. So, it's a real assault on your attention. And there's a few, you know, there's like gambling things on there and a few sexy websites and things like that. And other people have, most of the ones you look at seem to be people trying to sell things. But I think some people are on there for fun as well. Well, there's the Times newspaper masthead as well.

So, yeah. Yeah, they bought some space on there. So, it became this crazy thing. Just also by way of background, the guy called Alex Chu that did it is working in Silicon Valley now. And if anyone knows the Calm app, which people use to help get to sleep or relax and things like that, my wife uses it. He's behind that now. Oh, right. Yeah, I've heard about that.

Funnily enough. That's right down the other end of the spectrum from what I'm seeing visually. There's nothing calm about this. Yes. This is like one of those when someone's putting a PowerPoint together and they're trying to say, hey, you know, this image, this image, this image. You know what I mean? They're all there together and it's just a busy, very, very busy page. It's absolutely crazy. But clever idea. So, self-fulfilling prophecy, you know, like he's basically saying this is becoming famous for being famous, for being the thing

that he wants it to be to make money. Because I think other people tried to copy it after that, but this was kind of, because this was the guy who did it first. This was the one that got all the attention and became the one that worked. Million dollar homepage. Crazy, crazy. Any person who's willing to pay a few, pay some dollars, you know, I think as little as $10, you know, could have some space on this. So, that brings me to the million dollar podcast. Right. Yes.

The million dollar podcast would be the audio equivalent, the podcast equivalent, where anyone who's anyone can buy time on this audio file, on this piece of audio for $1 a second. $1 gets you one second. $10, you'd probably sell them in $10 chunks, I think, because one second's pretty impractical. So you pay $10 and you get 10 seconds to do with as you wish. You could play a bit of music. You could advertise something you want people to know about.

You could just send out a greeting. Hey, Mum, it's Brady. I love you. Or it could be, here's a song I've been working on. Or you could say, hey, everyone, I've got a podcast. You should listen to it. Here's the website for it. The world is your oyster.

And the more and the bigger piece of audio you buy, the longer the thing you can upload to it. And so you end up with an audio file that's just person after person or audio after audio after audio. And you never know what you're going to get. It's kind of like the audio equivalent of this website. after audio, and you never know what you're going to get. It's kind of like the audio equivalent of this website. It's just this kind of random assault on your ears. Right, right.

So, I'm going to resist the temptation to ask really practical questions, like, is it the same file that's uploaded again and again, so you have to listen from the start again each time? Yes, this is an interesting question, and this is something I've given some thought to. As I see it, I'm not sure I would put it necessarily into people's podcast feeds like that. I think it would more be one piece of audio that sits on a site that is constantly being updated. And I think it would probably start from the same spot each time i think the first people stay at the start i don't think i'd relegate them to the end necessarily but it's something that when you start playing because it's because it's a long piece of audio it could be something you would

just scroll through and just see where you're going to land today and go to different parts of it pick up from where you left off last time maybe maybe it could remember where you were last time or it could indicate here's the last place you were. So you can see what's new. Man, don't make it too technically difficult for me. Oh, yes, that's right. Because I'm going to make a version of this. I don't expect to sell a million seconds.

I don't know enough people. But I want to kind of make a version of it just so that you can experience it and people can be part of it and see how it turns out. What would you do if this existed? Well, it will exist soon. And you bought yourself a little piece of audio. What would you do? Would you plug the church? Would you have a Christian message for people maybe? So this is the one you've got to think about. You've got to think in terms of let's say it does have a big audience, right? So, let's say there ends up being a million dollars worth of space.

In other words, it's full and it's well known. And you know at least a lot of people are listening because the people who have bought some are at least going to listen to their bit. So, the audience is growing. But it becomes a destination like this million dollar homepage. People go to it just out of the curiosity. Yes. Oh, I wonder what's on there. Because it becomes like walking down a shopping mall with a thousand buskers.

What's the next busker going to be saying to me? Are they going to be singing me a song? Are they going to be trying to tell me to accept Jesus as my saviour? Are they going to be trying to tell me a joke? Like, if all these people get the chance to talk to me, what are they going to say, one after the other? That's a really good... These little short snippets. Well, I think it's a good thought exercise to stop and consider if... It's a social experiment, isn't it? Well, it is. That's right. If I wanted to say one thing that could be heard by a lot of people in 10 seconds, what

would it be? That is a really good thought. I mean, the million dollar homepage got taken over by advertising because it became this viral thing. And it was also a time where the internet where I don't think the internet had matured much and people didn't really see it as a place where they could go and express themselves as much as it was a place where you were communicated to. I think the internet's changed now and people would see this as a chance to have their own say.

A bit like when Reddit does, Reddit, you won't know this, but Reddit, I can't remember what it's called, but Reddit does this occasional annual thing where people, where they create a big thing like this and people can create their own images on this huge canvas. But it becomes like a battle and people can sort of encroach on other people's area. So, you create an image that you've got to kind of fight for it. Yeah, right. Like Risk, like you're invading other people's space across the board. A bit like Risk. Funnily enough, I'm uploading a video about Risk today on Numberphile, a game I've never played. Oh, right. So, it's funny you bring up Risk. So, it's funny you bring that up. But anyway, yes. Yeah. So, it becomes like that.

But so, I imagine it wouldn't become quite so advertising centric now. I think it would be a place where people go to do shout outs and greetings and be creative and just sort of show off for a moment or just have fun for a moment or send messages. Yeah. Or assert their worldview or say or. Yeah, yeah. It could become quite political. People want to say something about American politics or an upcoming election or a socio-political view, you know,

like a movemental view like Black Lives Matter or something like that. Yeah, it could. It may be interesting itself which way it went, if it went more commercial, if it went into that sphere, or if it became more individually personal, so people wanting to send a message to a specific person. Like, you know, will you marry me? There could be a little bit of that going on as well.

It could be. Well, Tim, I'm making it a real thing. Wow. I don't know if it will go beyond the civilians and it might just become a little fun unmade podcast thing. I don't know whether anyone else will ever have a look at it. But I've got milliondollarpod.com. I've got a landing page for it.

I've got a little place where people can go and buy their seconds. And if you want to add something to this artistic endeavour, this social experiment and become part of the Million Dollar dollar podcast go and get yourself some audio real estate dazzle us be creative amaze us i want to hear what you put on there is it just going to be hi mum is it going to be a song a poem what do you want to do how much time do you want and what do you want to do with it do you think people can have different amounts of time or should there be a specific you know like seven seconds or something like that that's just like a because 10 seconds is a long

time for just you know do you want to just sort of move through them a little bit more quickly i wonder i don't know or should you be able to buy up to 10 seconds if you want to but i like the idea of people who want to go a bit longer because they want to read a poem or have written a song or something like that. So you reckon even like even to 20 seconds, they can actually finish? Or do you think there should be a limit? Or do you think it just keeps going? People can buy as much as they want to. I mean, if I was doing it to try and make loads and loads of money, I guess I'd let people go as long as they want.

I'm not doing it for the financial reason. I'm doing it because it's a funny thing to do and I'm copying the homepage idea. But I don't think you should put a limit on there. Maybe you do need a limit. Maybe you need a two-minute limit or something, just because it could become quite unlistenable if someone bought, you know, three hours. That's right.

That's what I think. I think I wonder what makes me want to listen to this, and I think tripping over them reasonably quickly would be intriguing. Like, oh, that's one thing, and oh, that's another one, and that's another one is nice. You're right. You're right. You need a one-minute limit.

But you could then buy another piece later on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah, you're right. For the listening experience, you're right, it needs a bit of churn. So I think you're right. I think there needs to be a one-minute limit per purchase. Wow, I think that's the first time i've ever constructively and positively changed one of your podcast ideas i don't think that's ever happened before you're right you're right you i'm gonna do that i'm gonna put a one minute limit on that what million dollar pod is that

the idea is that what's what's what are pod. Is that the idea? Is that? What are you going to call it? The Million Dollar Podcast. Oh, yeah. Nice. Like the Million Dollar Homepage, Will's called. Wow, this is great. Hey, this is like a really cool thing. This is going to, you know, like it's going to be not just an idea now,

but you're making it straight away and it's going to be a bit of an experiment, see how it goes. I've already put some infrastructure in place. Hopefully, people can go and click on it now and get some seconds. Wow. What are you going to do? What are you going to put on there? This is really, are you going to put something on there?

Are you going to lead it off? Or you could use your first few seconds to explain it or to welcome. Yeah, maybe it needs just like a quick shout out at the start so people know what they're about to listen to. I could hide some secret words from the girls in there. Well, they could go and buy some time on there and put whatever they want on there. They could put their own words on there. That's right.

That's what am I doing their words for all the time? It's time they took responsibility for their words. They've got pocket money, haven't they? Yep. That's right. They could put in words such as mayonnaise and ravioli, for instance. Just, you know, thinking random words off the top of my head. There'd be nothing to stop them doing that.

No, indeed. Yeah. So, and I think I would list under the podcast, like, contributors. They could have their name there if they wanted and a link. So, I think that would, much like the Million Dollar Homepage, I think underneath is just a list of all the contributors. And if you click on that person's name, they can link that off to wherever they want.

So if you do want to just sell stuff, sell a pair of sneakers, if you're going to use a few seconds, say, hey, everyone, I've got a website where I sell woodwork chairs. Go to chairs.com and buy one of my chairs. You know, there's also a link there as well. Yeah, like the show notes. So every podcast has show notes, and this would be linked through the show notes. There is one burning question that obviously hasn't come into your head yet.

It's a logistics question. Right. What is the burning question? It's a practical problem. It's a problem with the idea. Well, how often do you upload it, I guess, or renew it? These are practical issues, but, you know, I can sort that out. You know, you could do it daily or weekly or monthly or whatever.

But, yeah, it would depend on how often people were buying time. Right. Here's the question, Tim. How long is a million seconds? Oh, right. If you're selling a million seconds, how long does that last? Well. How long do you think a million seconds? How long do you think it would take a million? Obviously, it takes a million seconds. But how long do you think? What's your intuition for how

long a million seconds? So, a million seconds, you need to divide by 60 to get. Before you do the math. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which I'm sure you're capable of. What's your feeling? My feeling? Okay, okay. So, a million. Like does a movie last a million seconds? A Hollywood movie? Somehow that intuitively feels about right. Yeah. No, no. I think it would be, I feel like it's a couple of hundred hours.

Oh, yeah. 278 hours. Yeah, okay. 11 and a half days. Wow. Okay. Well, that is quite long, isn't it? You feel like it shouldn't be that long.

So, I don't think this would be one audio file. I think it would be split over a few parts. Okay. Yep, yep, yep. If you were to sell all million seconds. Yeah, yeah. It would take a long time if you're pressing, you know, the jump 30 seconds ahead on your phone. That's quite a while.

Yeah, it would. It would. That is good. Yeah, no, that's really interesting. I like that. Yeah? This is great. Yeah, yeah.

Intriguing idea. Well done. Well done. Nice work, man. You've come through with something that's made a hell of a lot of work for yourself. Million dollar. Million dollar podcast. A million dollar. I can tell you there's something

even more amazing than this. Billion dollar podcast. Billion dollar podcast. Yep. That actually, that I think a billion seconds, I looked that up. I think it's 30 years or something. Hang on. How long is a billion seconds? What do you think a billion seconds is going to be? Well, if the other one's a few days, I guess it's, well, it depends. Isn't a billion different in different places? A billion is a hundred million. No, it's a thousand million, isn't it? So, um. It's either a million million or a thousand million, depending on where you are. I've got here, Google's telling me that it's about 31, over 31 years. Yeah, right. A billion seconds. Yeah. We've been doing this podcast for five years, but not continually.

I mean, we probably haven't even passed a million seconds. This is episode 138. If each one was an hour, and say each one's an hour, which is roughly right, that's only 138 hours. So we haven't even done, we haven't even made a million seconds of unmade podcast. Oh, wow. This is going to be quite a big project then, isn't it really? I like that you think I could come anywhere near selling a million seconds of audio. It would be interesting.

I'd be happy with a hundred seconds. I wish it was, we were able to search the audio for all of our episodes and find how many times things have been mentioned like how many times have you played that guitar part from money for nothing what this one there's one more we should have kept yeah how many times have you mentioned your dad's dutch yeah those things that we say we mention a lot The ones that are part of unmade law And it's like, really, how often?

How many times have you told that story about your mum and the emu? That's to you though I'm sure, have I told that on the Unmade podcast? Yeah, a couple of times Definitely a couple, maybe more Good idea, man Well, huge I feel overwhelmed because I've still got maybe more. Good idea, man. Well, huge. I feel overwhelmed because I've still got the-

Go now, people. Go now and get in early. Get some of the early airtime on the Million Dollar Podcast. If it becomes the next big thing, you'll be an early adopter. I think that's great. Yeah. Yeah. I feel a bit overwhelmed.

All right. But I do think it's interesting. We could do a welcome at the start, or We could do a welcome at the start or you could do a welcome at the start and I start thinking about what would I want to say in just a few seconds. How would you distill it down? The greatness of my – I think the minimum block I would say would be 10 seconds because just for practical reasons, like just like doing selling one second

is like and then having to deal with the admin of dealing with that person, sending them an email, getting their audio file, getting their link, putting it like just like because each bit of audio you drop in is work. And you don't want to be doing like, you know, five to ten minutes, maybe half an hour sometimes work dealing with each person for like, you know, $1. The other way to do it though, man, this is another way to do it, is to get everyone to indicate they want to participate in it and then set up a giant Zoom call meeting. And then you start listing people off. All right, one by one. When the other person finishes, you talk straight away. You're 10 seconds start

We actually recorded them all live No, no, no Not you, not you Not your turn You're after that person It's like I'm going from left to right Across my screen What about the million dollar Zoom call?

I wonder if there's a limit Everyone gets to be on the Zoom call That's great. Oh, that would be fantastic. You must love editing. Like, just love it. No, I'm not going to. I'm already regretting this.

Yeah, yeah. But I couldn't, like, say the idea and not, like, have a mechanism to do it, like to have people get to try it. Yeah, yeah. So- Do you want to put a time limit on it then in terms of this is going to be available for the next month or something like that? Nah, not yet.

I might at some point say, okay, we're going to close it off now. Yeah. But in the meantime, let's go. And then just leave the file there forever. So, you know. Yeah. Like the million dollar homepage exists forever. Yeah.

We'll see what happens. We'll see what happens. See how it unfolds. Check it out, people. We'll link in the description. MillionDollarPod. Yeah. Exists forever. Yeah. I'll see what happens. We'll see what happens. See how it unfolds. Check it out, people. We'll link in the description. Million dollar pod dot com. Million dollar pod dot com. That's it.

Surprise us. Be creative. I think there's real potential here for people to do something fun. They could. They could sing. They could. Yep. They could say something they've not told anyone.

It could be a little confession time. You know, that kind of idea. Yeah. You too had this confessional booth thing when they toured zoo tv and it could be one of those or they could uh ask someone to marry them or they could say which of the hosts they enjoy the ideas of the most that they but it doesn't also doesn't have to be them talking you could go and record the sounds of something you love, the sounds of your local park. Oh, that's a good idea. Your baby.

Yes. Your favourite sound, actually. Yeah, your baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your pet. Nice. Your dog barking. Is there some copyright issues?

People couldn't, like, have their favourite song, could they? They couldn't just send a snippet of someone else. You can't have copyrighted material. I've already got that in my little terms and conditions. Good work. Also, it has to be original material to the episode. So you can't just, like if you're a podcaster, you couldn't just get like, you know, a big long episode of your podcast and just upload it to this podcast.

Right, yes. So it's got to be original material. It can't be offensive material. It would have to be suitable for a general audience. Yep. So no potty mouth, nothing risque or too risque. It has to be in the zone of the unmade podcast, the vibe of the life. Yes.

Yeah, very good. I would say so. Nice. I would say so, but say so But preferably funnier Indeed Yes well that's right Yes Yes

See this is the bare minimum And there's lots of potential from there Something to jump off Yeah Indeed Quick parish notice Hello Connell from Ireland Who said

Hi Brady and Tim. I thought I'd mix it up as Tim always goes first. I showed the sofa shop ad jingle to my friend, and now he is truly invested in it. Whenever he goes to the gym, he always plays the sofa shop in his AirPods. He's listening to it at a concerning rate, and I am reaching out for help. Any advice? Well, it's wonderful. No and I am reaching out for help. Any advice? Well, it's wonderful.

No help needed there. That's great. Yeah. Yeah. It is addictive. It's an addictive tune. I don't know if I'd listen to it at the gym, though. I don't know if it would, you know, motivate me to.

I feel like it's the sort of thing that comes to mind and you might sing it at the gym. Like if you're running along and so forth. Especially if you're running at the right pace, you know, the right beat. So it was like an earworm like that, an enjoyable song to sing. Don't you do a thing until you see the sofa shop. Well, lifting something heavy. Don't you do a thing until you see the sofa shop. Yeah.

No, no, no help. Just carry on, sir. Carry on. Carry on as you were. Connell, I want more information, though. Is your friend listening to the original version? Are they listening to the rarely heard Halifax Street version, the true original?

Are they listening to covers submitted by civilians? We've got a whole youtube channel full of covers that they can listen to have they got their hands on a copy of the mixtape and they got it in their walkman what are they listening to short information here and now it's time for spoon of the week i don't have a spoon you've caught me out was i supposed to have a spoon no no no you don't need a spoon you don't have a spoon. You've caught me out. Was I supposed to have a spoon? No, no, no, no. You don't need a spoon. You don't need a spoon.

Obviously, people familiar with Spoon of the Week will know this is traditionally a time when Tim pulls out a collector teaspoon from the Hein family collection, accumulated over many, many years of travels around Victoria and just beyond. But today I've got a letter to read. Dear Brady and Tim, first of all, thanks for all the fun. My name is Noga from Tel Aviv. I tagged along around episode 100 and have been a fan since. Maybe one day I'll catch up on episode 1 to 99.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I mean, that's some of the good stuff back then. There's a couple of episodes between 1 to 99 that are almost worth listening to. A couple, indeed. Noga continues. I first started listening thanks to my partner, Orr, who is a loyal listener since day one and a Patreon supporter. His birthday is coming up soon. Brackets, January 28th.

So it's gone, but, you know, we're a bit slow here. Whoops. And since he was never mentioned as part of the merch algorithm winners, I figured it would be fun if he is mentioned on the podcast for the first time to celebrate. So happy birthday, or you can wish him happy birthday too. Happy birthday. What's the name again? You need to say it again. Or, oh, ah. Happy birthday, or you can wish him happy birthday too. Happy birthday. What's the name again?

You need to say it again. Or, oh, happy birthday, or happy birthday, or. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Happy birthday greetings. Happy birthday. Happy birthday to you.

Yes, indeed. To not just ask for a happy birthday greeting, let me tell you about our spoon collecting tradition, who you have been the inspiration for. And let me share with you the best spoon of all. When Orr and I first started dating, I went on a trip to Jordan for a few days. After nearly four months of dating, it was the longest we'd been apart. I really wanted to get him something to show that I was thinking of him,

even when there was no Wi-Fi around. But all the souvenirs were too tacky. And then I had the idea to get him a spoon. As a joke, referencing the podcast, the only spoon I could find was tacky as well, as you can see, and even has a magnet on the back. But nonetheless, it was our first spoon. We then decided to get a spoon in every country we visit together.

This one is too precious for me to send to you, but on our next trip we'll get two and send one over. Thanks again for the good times. Greetings from Israel. There we go. That's from Noga. And Noga included a picture of the Jordan spoon, which I will include in the show notes and on screen on YouTube and all that

so people can have a look at this Jordan spoon, the seed of a new collection inspired by the Unmade podcast, inspired by the Hein family. Tim, you're creating a whole new generation of spoon collectors. Well, it is. Around the world. It's an honour and I'm pleased. And I wonder what other collections of people have started collecting spoons again.

They are something that I think has been lost over the last couple of generations because my parents are, you know, a bit older. So I don't think even baby boomers really got into it. Maybe they did. Certainly Gen X, not interested. We're bringing spoons back. We're bringing spoons back. That's right.

Yeah, well, they are. They're cool. I think they're great. It's a wonderful idea. I think they're a nice thing to collect. I think if we look back at our legacy, if we inspire a new generation of spoon collectors, I think we've done something. I think we've made a difference. Well, it's something to be very proud of.

It's a legacy point, if you'd like. It's kind of, I think it's more your dad's legacy than ours. How do you think he would feel about it if he was still with us? Well, he would be very proud. I don't know where he got the idea. I guess it was just a thing that people did, but he's just always done it. Maybe he got it from a radio show he listened to on the wireless. That's right. They have radio when your dad was young. Or was that before Marconi? No, there were radios. There certainly weren't

podcasts, but no, there were the only pods he knew were for beans and peas. No, the only pods your dad knew was sauropods and other dinosaurs. Right. Yes, that's right. I don't remember dad waking up one day and saying, hey, I'm going to be a spoon collector. Like, it's just something he always did. And it was always there.

Well, he probably, was he doing it before you were born? Probably. Yes. Yes. Because many of them were from before then. They were really quite old, as we've seen in the collection. They were just always on our wall. Well, Noga and Orr, good luck with the spoon collecting.

If anyone else has started a spoon collection because of the Unmade podcast, let us know. We would love to take more credit. And I'll tell you, there's a hole in the market for the spoon racks as well. It's not that they're hard to get but there's i reckon there's i've gone to buy them online before and and i've got not been satisfied and gone through with it so there's some inventive and novel opportunities for people to do some creative uh spoon rack a good spoon rack is hard to find it is is. It is. That's right. Very good. So, speaking of spoons, it's time for us to give away some prizes to our Patreon supporters. Noga did mention that Orr is a Patreon supporter, but has not yet been lucky enough to be smiled

upon by our prize-giving algorithm. And you'll be pleased to know, Noga, that tradition has continued. Yes. Nice. And you'll be pleased to know, Noga, that tradition has continued. Yes. Nice. We will be sending one of our unmade podcast spoons forged in the fires of a spoon making foundry here in the UK to Bartle from the Faroe Islands.

Where are the Faroe Islands? Well, this is a good question. One to which I don't really know the answer. I know they've got a really weak football team. They're like the whipping boys of European football. Right. So, Faroe is in F-A-R-O-E. Yeah. The North Atlantic Ocean is part of the- it's an autonomous territory of the Kingdom of Denmark.

So, there we go. Okay. Looks like stunning. Small, but stunning. Well done, Bartle. Enjoy the Faroe Islands. And you may have the only Unmade Podcast spoon on the Faroe Islands. We are also sending one of our Australian nut leather key rings.

This is the real hot item at the moment. This is the one everyone wants. Yeah. To Dylan P from Florida. And this is the second time Dylan P. has received a key ring from us. The algorithm has smiled upon Dylan twice. Congratulations, Dylan. A second key ring coming your way.

It's going to get to a point where you can have an individual key ring for each key. That's right. Or it could end up on eBay. Who knows? If he's got two, I wonder. Yeah, it could. What price would it go? Or you could have one key with lots of key rings,

kind of flip the whole thing on its head. Who knows? Do with it what you will, Dylan. Coming your way to Florida. And we're going to be sending some Spoon of the Week collector cards. There's been a bit of buzz about the collector cards this week, I've noticed, Tim, on Reddit. People are starting to do a few trades. There are a few people getting near

having a full set, but need to do a bit of trading to get it. We're going to be sending a handful of cards out to three of our Patreon supporters. Kelly Mook from Oregon, Tatiana from Hertfordshire, here in the UK, and Alan from Stockholm in Sweden. Collector cards coming your way. Nothing to say there, Tim? Just stunned silence?

That's great. Congratulations, everybody, for winning. People want to be congratulated by you. They don't just want to hear my voice. Well, I don't know. You sort of, I was hoping you'd send me through the names to say or allow me to play something. Oh, do you want to say the names?

Would you have liked to have said the names? Oh, yeah. No, but that's all right. No, you've done it now. I'll do it next time. Congratulations. No, congratulations, everybody. It's like we're at the Oscars and we've kind of, I've opened the envelope and read the

winner and you're like, oh, I wanted to read the winner's name for the Oscars. But you read the nominees first as well, though. That's the thing. There's always- Supposed to share them. Yeah. We should start doing that. So, like, to get more name checking, we should, every time we do the winners,

read out, okay, these patrons are the nominees for the prizes. So, we can hear their name and think, oh, my God, I've made the final 10. I might get a spoon. And then we say, but only one of you is getting the spoon. And this week it's Bartle from the Faroe Islands. The rest of you, you get nothing. Good idea. Good idea.

And they have to just, like, smile gracefully, like at the Oscars. Yeah, okay. Do you- In the algorithm, do you get several names up? Like, you want to do it just with the winners and who gets the best one. You don't want to do it like these people are nominated and this person wins a spoon, but the other two win nothing. I could tweak the algorithm to have nominees and winners. I could do that. We could have like a short list.

I don't see much point to it other than just like increasing the number of people that get to hear their name on the podcast. Yeah, well, that's fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it would almost be a bit more agonising for those people because they're like, oh, finally the algorithm did pick my name and i still don't get a prize yeah but that's you know that's that's but it was an honor just to be nominated surely yeah okay all right i've actually had another idea of something we can do with our patreon supporters on the show too but i'll save that for next week

or or a future episode because uh it's something a little something i'm working on on the side and i don't know what you'll think about it. So we'll come back to that another time. Go to patreon.com slash unmade FM if you'd like to support the show. We're always doing fun stuff with the patrons. And you get request room, the bonus show to listen to as well that we record at the end of every normal show. Thank you to everyone for that. We really appreciate the patronage. You are.

You're crucial to our very existence. One thing that is also crucial to our very existence is ideas for podcasts. Tim, have you got one? I do have an idea. You know when someone says, I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but and then they say something that is incredibly deflating or, you know, dispels an illusion. That's what this podcast is about. And so I really thought about calling it When the Bubble Bursts or something like that.

Yeah, Bursting Bubbles. That's a great name. When it's a podcast which explores moments of deflation, like reality encroaching in on fantasy. Yeah. Yeah. And delusions being dispelled. I love it. Sorry to burst your bubble.

But you're always listening after that. I love it. I love it. Have you had any bubbles burst recently? I did. There was a moment the other day um of self bubble bursting which is um in some ways the sweetest in a way because when you you come to your senses about something you have to know a couple of things before i tell this story the first one is that um uh for for

i ride a vespa scooter to work right um the second thing you need to know is that i um for lunch uh every day i have pretty much the same thing which is a can of sort of three bean mix and tuna it's good healthy sort of protein handy sort of size like a can size is it all in one is it pre-mixed yeah yeah yeah like a pre pre-mixed little pack and um yeah and pack. Do you have it on bread or anything or does it have it just out of a bowl? No, no, just pour it, put it, throw it in a bowl, rip it open, put it in a bowl because I like how quick it is as well. And it's like yummy, nutritious and quick and I can keep working and away we go, right? Yeah. So I usually grab two or three of these, throw them in my laptop bag and, you know, take them to work.

laptop bag and, you know, take them to work. However, the other day, my wife found them on sale. So bought 10 of each of the flavors. So therefore 30 cans. And I thought, oh, this is going to be great. I'm going to take them all to work and I'm going to have them all in the cupboard and all stocked up. So I put them all in a bag. Big stash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm faced with the issue. I've got a ride to work and i've got my normal bag and then i've got 30 cans of tuna which which are in another bag um sort of like a tote bag sort of thing precariously between my knees yeah so it's one of those things where i'm i'm i get on the the vespa and i head off through the city and i'm feeling precarious and i'm feeling a little bit like, oh, this is a bit weird.

You know what I mean? It's like I've got 30 tuna cans and my bag and I'm off to work and I'm trying to drive carefully and all that kind of stuff. And I negotiate through the traffic and get out to sort of a more open area, heading down to the coast where my college is. And I pick up a bit of speed and start to feel better and get into the groove. And there's something about being on the scooter that's like fantastic. You know, the air, it's just alive and the roads open.

And here we go, get past this traffic. This is great. And just as I'm feeling that wonderful visceral feeling of the open road on my motorbike, I look up and there's this massive billboard up ahead coming towards me. And it's of that exact picture. It's like a wilderness open road track. And there's like this ruggedly good looking guy on a motorbike. And he's got this, you know, great brown jacket and it's a scrambler bike. And's you know windswept and the roads there and i look up and i go yeah that's me that's that's that's the very just just just for a moment i'm

totally buying into the image of the ad you know what i mean it's like that is yeah that is a visual representation of exactly what i'm feeling here right now. Yeah. And so I sort of linger on the sign for just a little, you know, just like, whoa, that's great. That's exactly me. And then I finally cast my eyes down to the taxi that stopped immediately in front of me. And it's one of those, the spell breaks, and I slam on my brakes and come to a stop, so forth.

And I just sort of stop and it's like the heart's pounding. And I look down. Because you've nearly had a crash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, and I've got 30 cans of tuna. And I'm like, is there, like, this is like. You've got 30 cans of tuna and beans in a shopping bag. This is, I'm like, it's like like i suddenly it's like i went from being

oh who's the actor in the great escape you know who's who's on the motorbike steve mcqueen i went from being steve mcqueen to mr bean like literally with all the beans and it's like oh steve mcqueen to mr b no i am just a you know a guy sitting awkwardly on a scooter with like a ridiculous amount of banal lunch sitting between knees precariously driving to work. And it was like I bought into the myth and then suddenly I bought into the fact that I'm just, yeah, an awkward Muppet-ish kind of guy with tuna heading to work who's about to slam into the back of a taxi. Stuck behind a taxi. Another time you always get brought back down to earth is when you look at your mobile phone and you don't realise you've got the forward-facing camera switched on and you see your face and you're like lying in bed or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. With like 19 chins and... Yeah. I also think, do you have any of those apps, like banking apps and things like that, where

you have to scan your face to prove that it's you? Yes. Like you're making some payment or something and you've got to like blink at your thing. It's amazing how unflattering you always are in those images, like, because you've always got this gormless look on your face because you're just doing something basic like banking. You're always in a crappy room with terrible lighting. You always look terrible. I think the bank, people who work in the bank and call centres and that must have some room

where there's just like huge banks of screens on the wall where our pictures are just coming up as we take those pictures where they're just laughing at us. Like, look at this one. Look at that dude. Look at him. Look at the look on his face when he did his ID picture. Oh, my God, that's the worst one I've seen today. But anyway, but coming back to your burst the bubble idea, I love this idea. Your example wasn't exactly what I was thinking of, but it's a really nice example of a moment where you sort of came back down to

earth. The first thing I thought of is, and I know I reference this all the time, but it is the first thing I thought of is movies that are portrayed as true stories and then you find out the actual story. I often use the example of Chariots of Fire, one of my favourite movies about the Paris Olympics in the early 1900s. And it's this great story about rival athletes and morals and things like that. And all these amazing things happen in the film that I won't go over again. But then when you go onto Wikipedia and read what really happened, a lot of facts were

changed quite dramatically to make the narrative in the film better. I mean, the essence of the story is kind of true, but a lot of stuff was changed. And it really bursts your bubble when you watch that film and think, isn't that amazing that it happened? What an incredible story. And then you're like, well, actually, it didn't really happen like that and it didn't happen in that order and actually this happened.

There are a lot of films that you think are true stories or based on true stories. And when you read what really happened, the bubble is burst. Another great cinematic bubble bursting moment is when you watch a Hollywood film based on a true story. And, you know, at the end, just before they roll the credits or while they're rolling credits, they'll use pictures and footage of the real people. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, you know, you've watched some Hollywood actor play it and then they'll show some images of the real people to show, like, you know, it's always a nice moment at the end. Oh, here's the real person this happened to. And they're never as good looking as the Hollywood actor that's just portrayed them. And it is a bit of a bubble bursting moment when you see, oh, they're just a bit of a normal person, aren't they?

And that can be a big moment for that as well. Bubble bursting moments, I mean, and that can be that can be a big moment for that as well bubble bursting moments that i mean because it can be part of it is that we live in this kind of hyper reality fantasy land isn't it of the examples you've given uh you know we want stories told to us that are utopian and and amazing so there's this idea that this podcast can be a bit like smelling salts you know like waking you up to reality again. So I thought about people coming on and telling those sorts of stories about themselves.

I know, for instance, it could be someone who says, I know you've heard this about me. Let me tell you the story was something a little bit different. And it's kind of like, oh, right. But then they might go on to talk about how their, you know, their life, like, you know, there's always the story about people who become rich and famous and incredible and then it's actually like it's actually unfulfilling and it's, you know, not as great.

And so let me tell you the truth and then they find a different pathway forward or something like that. Yeah. So there's room for that in there as well. I also thought there's a fun room for like a confronting, like because the language, it's not burst my bubble let me burst my bubble let me burst your bubble so it's like i wonder if there's some sort of confronting situation where a person two people go on and one person's going to break some news

to the other one about something um yeah needs a bit of thought to how that could work but you know someone's literally oh my goodness seeing behind the scenes of things is often a bubble bursting moment seeing how a tv show is made or how or what you think is a reality show is actually being made can be very bubble bursting uh seeing how films are made um seeing how things you love are created can be deflating sometimes i had one of those the other day. A photo just came up on social media somewhere, which was the view of what the actors see from the set of Cheers. So for those who are too young to know, Cheers is a classic show, you know, set in a bar in Boston, I think it is, isn't it?

And it's so familiar. It's so homely. It's so lovely, you know, the nice bar and all that kind of stuff. But this was taken from behind the bar facing outwards. You can recognise the bar. But, of course, all you can see is a massive bank of studio chairs, you know, like the audience and so forth. Yeah.

And it's just the fourth wall gone. And I felt it in that moment of, oh, right. Oh, yeah. Okay. Because even though I know it's a TV show, somehow I kind of feel like, oh, it's a TV show being made in a bar. And I never once believe it's not a studio. But you do. It just does something.

It does something. Even though I know it, it bursts the bubble. And I'll think about that the next time I watch it tim i think this is a great idea i would love to hear from um civilians if they want to get in touch with us in all those ways you can get in touch with us email unmadefm at gmail.com reddit social media all those all those ways people contact us after the show about a bubble being burst for you what was what was what was a moment for you where there was something you thought was one thing and then you know there could be a place you visited a place you always wanted to see i always wanted to see the

eiffel tower and then when i finally saw it like it burst my bubble it wasn't what i expected in fact the eiffel tower did not do that no it's amazing it's even more amazing than i thought but i'm trying to think of places i've always wanted to go where the bubble was burst a little bit. I remember you reflecting a little bit on, I've lost the name of it, you know, with the presidents on the cliff. Oh, yeah, the Mount Rushmore. Mount Rushmore, yeah. You thought that was smaller. I've not been there, but that is a place people often express disappointment about.

Yeah, that it's not this vast, vast cliff. You're always that person who's kind of like the voiceover, the DVD voiceover telling the true story to me. Like, over the years when we've seen a film, and I'll be like all emotional and gushy at the end, and then the lights come up, and you've always sometimes been that person who leans over and goes, it wasn't quite like that actually. I'm your own personal bubble burster. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's both good news and bad news. Like it's bad news in the moment because it's like, oh, okay. But then I'm like even more intrigued to know what really happened. I'm sorry, Tim. No, no really happened. All right.

I'm sorry, Tim. No, no, that's all right. Well, I'll tell you a place where bubbles are never burst, and that's the request room, and that's where we're off to record now. So if you're a Patreon supporter, well, you can go and you'll be able to listen to the request room. There are various ways to listen to it, podcast players, the Patreon website, go to patreon.com slash unmadefm. Tim, we've got all sorts of questions and things we've been asked

to do in this one, so we'd better get to it. But everyone else, thanks for listening. Don't forget, million-dollar podcast, milliondollarpod.com. There'll be a link in the description. If you want to get yourself some audio, get in it, get on it. I want to hear your contribution. Do you know what's in the running for what I'm going to say? Right at the top of the list at the moment.

It may change, but for the moment, I'm going to go with happy birthday, Orr.