The Unmade Podcast - 139: Rogue Tub of Ice Cream

Episode Date: February 21, 2024

Tim and Brady discuss the letter J, ice cream, Valentine’s Day, Lego flowers, a new puppy, Jason Kelce, Shapes, more bubble bursting, and Tim sings about knots.Support us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/unmadeFMCatch the bonus Request Room episode - https://www.patreon.com/posts/98942233Join the discussion of this episode on our subreddit - https://redd.it/1awnxdmCatch the podcast on YouTube where we often include accompanying videos and pictures - https://www.youtube.com/@unmadepodcastUSEFUL LINKSMichael J. Fox - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_J._FoxGolden North - https://goldennorth.com.auPictures of Tim’s ‘rogue tub’ with only 4/5 raisins - https://www.unmade.fm/episode-139-picturesLego flowers (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/3UOHc9XLego Sorting Hat (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/49lzcS9Lego Chewbacca (affiliate link) - https://amzn.to/3wqsHPCBrady’s new puppy - https://www.unmade.fm/episode-139-picturesWinnie on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/the_wonderful_winnie/Jason Kelce - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jason_KelceMeet Joe Black - https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/meet_joe_blackArnott’s Shapes - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arnott%27s_ShapesThe Million Dollar Podcast - https://www.unmade.fm/million-dollar-podcastThe Unmade Spreadsheet on episodes - https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1yBjcOPMrSETwZxiQTpupODC4EAYVZFSauuqJFKZIGcwBrady’s knot videos on Numberphile - https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLt5AfwLFPxWLyfD4nhZCX_3UZdSSpkBTsCatch the bonus Request Room episode - https://www.patreon.com/posts/98942233Information about getting the Request Room into your podcast feed (for patrons) - https://bit.ly/3uQWhNz

I was just watching something with Michael J. Fox in it, and I was just thinking about Michael J. Fox, the actor in general. Yeah. And it occurred to me, we are both Js. I'm a Brady J. Harron, and you're a Timothy J. Hine. Do you think we would have been more successful in life if we incorporated our Js? Ooh, you know, I did for a little while.

Just for a little while in high school, I wrote Timothy J. Hine because I thought it looked formal and official and cool. But I wasn't that successful in high school, so I don't think it was working there and it dropped. But maybe we could give it another bash. Brady J. Harron. I don't know. It worked for him.

It certainly did. I mean, he did have other skills too. That wasn't the only sort of arrow in his quiver. It was also sort of affable and, you know, short and funny and a good actor. Yeah. Just trying it out there. Maybe we should call this like the un... How about the Unmade Jay podcast?

Unmade Jay podcast. Or the Unjay Made podcast. Homer Simpson's middle name's Jay as well. Remember that episode where he always wants to find out what his middle name stood for? Because all he ever knew himself was the initial J. And the whole episode happens, Homer J. Simpson. What does the J stand for?

And then it's finally revealed at the end. It stands for J, J-A-Y. So he says, oh, finally, I'm Homer J. Simpson. Why? So he says, oh, finally, I'm Homer J. Simpson. So one of our old episode ideas from many moons ago was letters of complaint. I even had like letters of complaint music and jingle made, I think. So I can dust that off because, Tim, I understand you've written a letter of complaint. Letters of complaint. Yeah, well, it's actually I've written a letter of complaint. Letters of Complaint.

Yeah, well, it's actually, I think the best letters of complaint, even though I know there's a lot of fun to be had, come from something genuine. So I was eating what is one of my personal treats, like a real treat for me, which is Golden North ice cream. And as I've explained before on the podcast, I only really enjoy two favourite types of ice cream, boysenberry and rum and raisin.

Of course, for people who don't know, Golden North is a brand. Indeed. They make different flavours. A famous South Australian brand of which we're very proud. Wonderful ice cream. So I was enjoying a rum and raisin. And then as I started to notice something, but rather than explain it, I sort of put a fair bit of it into the letter. So how about I read the letter?

So you've written this letter to Golden North. I've written a letter to Golden North Ice Cream, to the managing director. And of course, anyway, dear Mr. Adamo, I wish to congratulate you on the quality of your product, especially the boysenberry and rum and raisin. I sort of suck up for a little while here and, you know, sadly, however, I now have to turn to a matter regarding the latter, the rum and raisin, in some distress. Devouring a recent two-letter tub of rum and raisin, I encountered only four raisins. At first, I assumed this was just the top section, hiding the flavour under a covering of promise. Perhaps the raisins were bunched en masse further down.

And so initially, I wasn't concerned. Instead, I viewed the absence as a coincidence of delayed gratification. However, on the second and third night, scoop after scoop revealed nothing more than smooth, light brown ice cream, unbroken by the peppering of raisins. It looked like, to me, the Sahara Desert after a sandstorm. Or the Sahara Dessert, if you will. The Sahara dessert, if you will. Very good. I determined to dig at a faster pace, searching frantically,

and over the next few evenings made real progress, a not unpleasant task. On and on, progressing lower and lower, I continued until I finally hit the dreaded blue plastic at the bottom and reality set in. the tub was sans raison so in processing the event i can see i must reach out in order to move on as you can see in the attached photos i couldn't eat any further the fear of a repeat experience is paralyzing i just can't go through this again. Can you therefore please advise? And I've got five questions.

Yep. Number one, does Golden North have a policy on the minimum number of raisins for every two litre tub? Number two, was there an exceptional circumstance which might explain this tragedy? For instance, was the person in charge of raisins away on holiday and you were unable to cover his or her shift? Number three, will the raisin guy or girl be back soon? Number four, what assurance can you provide that this was a rogue tub and not an entire batch, which I'm sure would have prompted a public recall? which I'm sure would have prompted a public recall. And number five, is it possible for me to be compensated with another tub with extra raisins?

Yours sincerely, Tim Hine. So basically you had a tub of rum ice cream. That's right, that's right. Which is not unpleasant. I mean, if that's what it was, yeah which which is not unpleasant i mean if that's what it was that's great but the raisins really make it and there was i have to add as i well i finally did go back and polish off that last little bit down there right and i did find one more raisin so anyway i contacted as i said i sent this through i i i got back initially a request for a photo you know of of the evidence you know like on the side with a few more details, like the date it was produced, you know, that kind of thing.

Sent that back. And then I just the other day received the following letter. Dear Tim, thank you for your recent contact concerning the quality problem that you experienced with our ice cream. We always welcome consumer feedback as a means of addressing all problems promptly and assessing the safety, quality and acceptability of our products in the marketplace. We sincerely apologise for any inconvenience the quality concern may have caused you. Please accept our apologies for our disappointment and find enclosed a $10 voucher as reimbursement for your inconvenience. Wow. I know.

I know. Where was the $10 voucher for? Because there's not like a Golden North shop, is there? No. She asked for clarification of where I purchased it, and I received a gift card for that chain of supermarket. So that's real care i think they were they could see that i was upset um i trust that this matter has not lessened your confidence in our products which it hasn't and hope that you will remain a value golden north customer which i will again

thank you for bringing the matter to our attention yours sincerely um and then it's from the compliance officer uh which clearly the managing directors delegated it to for special treatment you for bringing the matter to our attention yours sincerely um and then it's from the compliance officer uh which clearly the managing directors delegated it to for special treatment vip treatment if you were um yeah and there you have it yes okay would you be satisfied do you think that's a satisfactory response i think it's a good response if they had really if they had understood that you were having a joke then it would have been funny if they sent you a packet of raisins as well but i think they couldn't risk that in case you were serious like you really were upset and i think so i think they were playing

a straight bat as we would call it in australia uh to a bit of cricket parlance so they were playing it very straight on the off chance that you really were mad right right they could have had more fun with it they could have had more fun with it what do you mean the off chance that i was mad no that's right it could have been it could have been quite a thing i think couldn't it to have added in a few raisins but um i mean i'm happy now but i haven't bought i haven't used the voucher yet which i will do for another tub of rum and raisin in particular but okay i i'd give them the benefit of the doubt this is surely a one in a in a in a million i mean i wouldn't have had a million tubs i would have had a lot but not a million and this is the first time

there's a famous thing in physics where they talk about uh the way that particles like particles of air are distributed in a room there is a a chance, and it will happen eventually, in any room that you're sitting in, that all the particles, all the air particles that are all bouncing off each other and booming around the room and you're breathing, could just all cluster in the top corner of your room, up there in the corner, up by the ceiling, and there'll be no air anywhere else in the room,

just by chance, just by the way all the collisions go.'s it's vanishingly unlikely but it will happen eventually wow so maybe that's what's happened with your ice cream you've had that freak tub where all the raisins have just collected somewhere else in the big vat and when they scooped it out and put it into your container it was just you know i mean you did have well sounds like you had five raisins yes truth be told yes because of that extra one you found but yeah but maybe you know one day you could get a tub with zero raisins just by sheer luck oh don't say that oh gosh how many raisins would you like like how many raisins do you expect in a two litre tub oh you know what that is a very good question i should be up. Well, that's a very good question. You should have an answer for that.

I mean, four is too low. Okay, we've established that. I think you would expect to have at least a raisin in every scoop of, you know, as you take a bite. Every spoonful. Every spoonful, yeah. Do you think that's fair or is that maybe not every spoonful? I think not every one, but I would expect an average of one maybe. Like I would accept a spoonful with none, but I would expect two in my next one.

Yes, right. I certainly think one should feature in every scoop. If you talk about, you know, those scoopy things they use to put them on. A big ice cream scoop. Yeah, yeah. You'd expect one in there. So you'd have to say that there would be, you know, 10 or 20 or something. I mean, I don't know.

I'm speculating here. But five is too few. I would like them to have offered you a tour of the Golden North facility so you could see how the raisins were put into the ice cream. Well, that's true. Then that would be fantastic, wouldn't it? Do you reckon they'd let me look at the boysenberry as well? That would be a real treat.

Oh, they might. They may as well while you're there you'd be like augustus gloop though and that they'd turn their back on you and then they'd find you like drinking it out of the vat falling in it'd be your willy wonka moment that means i wouldn't get to inherit the factory that's not fair we should see if we could organize a tour of the golden north ice cream factory for tim and the That means I wouldn't get to inherit the factory. That's not fair. We should see if we can organise a tour of the Golden North Ice Cream Factory for Tim and the Unmade Podcast. We'll get on to that. We'll get on to that. But maybe they don't want you to see the Oompa Loompas. Maybe that's true.

I would happily become a resident Oompa Loompa at the Golden North. It's beautiful ice cream. And it's here in South Australia. Soia so yeah let's look into it let's see if we can get let's see if we can get team into the golden north ice cream factory for a bit of uh raisin quality control and also to inspect how the boysenberry is made well that is that is a very good idea we'll get onto that straight away in fact let's stop recording and do that right now all right ideas for a podcast my idea for a podcast today tim centers around valentine's day which has passed as we record but you know there's no rules saying we can't do it after the fact yeah but before we get to my idea for a podcast i want to do a bit of valentine

chat do you do you celebrate val celebrate Valentine's Day in your family? Do you and your wife? No. No, not at all. You're quite romantic, though. So why don't you do it? I don't know. I think we just sort of it looks a bit like the thing that everyone else is doing.

And we don't want to do the thing that everyone else is doing. Everyone else does Christmas. Everyone else does birthdays birthdays but they only do that because we do it we right i think maybe it might be as silly as the trajectory being set early in our relationship where one of us or the other i hope it wasn't me um that said you know look at all those red roses for sale and they're so expensive and oh gosh, it's, you know what I mean? And for some reason that means the other person didn't do something that year and we never have. And it's become like a thing that's just part of our relationship. I have no in principle problems with it.

I've never really given it much thought. I just know that we don't really do anything. But look, every day is valentine's day in our relationship brady you might only celebrate it once a year i asked some uh patreon supporters what if they got any gifts this year or what's going on sam one of our stakeholders said my mum always sends me a valentine's card and chocolates i've always thought this is strange what do you think yeah that is strange that is strange right okay there you go sam that's strange i think it's cute i think it's sweet yeah well i guess it's not weird strange

it's just like oh yeah no if my mum bought me a bunch of flowers for valentine's day i'd sort of say oh okay that's mum and i'd yeah, don't do that again, mum. Thanks. That's, you know. I saw a funny jokey, like, you know, social media post the other day where someone said, oh, this is the worst year ever. For the last 20 years, someone,

mysterious person has always sent me a Valentine and this year they stopped. I can't believe it. And a month after my grandma died as well. Yeah. Another stakeholder called Benji said, my boyfriend gave me what I would call the ultimate Valentine's gift this year and took me on a trip to Geneva in Switzerland.

Wow. Before you get too excited, Tim, we visited the Large Hadron Collider at CERN, but unfortunately unfortunately in typical fashion missed the guided tour for that day due to running late all the same it was an amazing experience to visit the science gateway museum there on a very scientific themed romantic trip that does sound very sciencey that's like if if you got me something for valentine's day it'd be yeah large hadron collider and finally another

stakeholder jennifer uh my hubby got me a lego flower bouquet and i love it i can't kill them and it's not a gifted responsibility to remember to water them also i get the extra joy of building them lego's gone crazy with flowers at the moment every time i go on the lego site and i do that probably three or four times a day right they're always releasing new lego flowers you know roses and all the different flowers and that like it's become it's becoming big thing stop at lego i don't want to build flowers i want star wars sets more star wars sets and architecture. We have Lego flowers sitting on our kitchen bench that the girls have made. Do you like them? I do. I like them a lot.

I think there's, apart from one leaf that persistently falls off and I feel like every time I walk past, I click it back on again. The rest of it is beautiful. It's quite pretty, quite effective from a distance even. It's not what Lego's about though, is it? No, no. No. It's like those Lego's about though, is it? No. No. No. It's like those adult colouring in books.

You know, adults that really get into colouring in and you're kind of like, what, what are you, you're what? I guess that's, that's good. It's wholesome. It's lovely. But I don't think it's for you. It's sort of funny like that. Well, I don't mind adults doing Lego.

Don't get me wrong. I just don't think Lego should be flowers. it shouldn't be adult oriented or too serious is that right it should be playful and that flowers feels too serious no it just should be it just should be more mechanical and spaceships and cars and buildings and it shouldn't be like soft organic organic petals and leaves. That's not what Lego's about. Lego's about... It's not... It should be industrially oriented rather than nature oriented. Yeah, Lego's brick, so it should be sort of bricky and mechanical and, you know, like, yeah, like human made things.

Human made things are made of Lego, not natural things. Well, this could be polarising. This could be polarising. We'll see on the feedback. Well, obviously, obviously, obviously it's popular because they're putting it out like there's no tomorrow. It's obviously massively popular. I think I would agree with you. Like if there was an orchid, I would be interested in making like an intricate orchid out of Lego. Oh, they do all that.

But, like, for example, though, and I'm not just being anti-flower. They've put out a new Lego kit just this month, which is the Harry Potter sorting hat. You know, the big floppy hat that they put on their kids. And it says Gryffindor. They've made, like, a version of that out of Lego. And it just looks wrong having a floppy hat Like made out of Lego with all the angles They made Chewbacca from Star Wars

You know, the big hairy creature They had like a life, not life size But they had like a model, a life model of Chewbacca And Chewbacca's made of hair And he's all flowy and woolly and stuff And you can't make that out of lego bricks it just looks wrong lego stuff has to be angular what are you what is it what that's really interesting that this pushes your buttons hmm i just think i just think i don't know i don't know it just doesn't

look it doesn't look right made out of lego it doesn't look right i want to say the thing i like about lego is that it's i think it's a toy right i think it's probably the probably the greatest toy apart from you know the wheel it's just an amazing toy but it's a toy and so taking it too seriously and in adult oriented ways feels a little bit crazy for me but i think it's a toy a wonderful playful toy yeah you can see i've got a bunch of Lego boxes on the desk behind me, so I take my Lego seriously. Although I never build them, I take buying Lego seriously. For you, the boxes are the bricks? Like, you just like buying boxes of Lego? I'm going to make a massive model out of unmade boxes.

That would be quite an art installation. That's great. And the thing you make is a big Lego box. That's right. Anyway, I got a Valentine's present. Wow. This year. Oh, yes.

So I got my wife one. I got her a water bottle for the gym that she wanted, customised with her initials, and a book of poetry by her favourite poet. Oh, nice. I feel like that's a proper Valentine's present. So, I came home. I was actually away on Valentine's Day, the day before, and I arrived back on Valentine's

evening from a trip to Nottingham. And I came into the house and my wife met me at the front door and said, you know, you say I never get you big presents for Valentine's Day, we'll come into the lounge, I've got a surprise for you and i opened the door and went into the lounge room and my wife had bought for valentine's day for me ostensibly for me a puppy a puppy we have a new dog i walked in and there it was sitting in a box with a ribbon around its neck, a little girl, a little chihuahua called Winnie, and she'd named her Winnie.

She had a list of ten names she liked, my wife, and Winnie was one of them, and she named her Winnie after Winnie Cooper, the character from The Wondiers, who was a childhood crush of mine, keeping the kind of Valentine's romance theme going. So we have a new little puppy called winnie unauthorized purchase well firstly let me ask you this coming from the front door into the living room what did you have any expectation and was a puppy part of it no clue i was caught completely unaware i was like completely completely the full story is we've been thinking about getting

another dog for a while since audrey our the chihuahua died uh over six months ago now uh and we were getting close we were looking at different breeds but then we came back to thinking it should be a chihuahua and we went a couple of weeks ago and looked at some chihuahua puppies including looking specifically at this dog. And it was gorgeous and cute and we really liked it. But then on the drive home, we decided now's not the time. My wife also wasn't sure. She thought she might want a different look.

But I loved this dog. I loved the look of it. But I just thought it's the wrong time. We've got some travel coming up. We've obviously got our little son. I thought let's give her another six months maybe wait for the summer maybe a different dog and we we came to the conclusion no and we got back to the woman who showed us the dog and said thank you for your time but sorry it's not the time for us yeah and it had drifted out of my head but obviously i hadn't drifted out of my wife's head and she

stayed in touch with the person and one thing led to another. And in the end, she just went ahead and did it behind my back. So, I had seen the dog before and my wife knew that I liked it a lot, but I had no idea. And I was completely at a loss. Like, it was one of the first times in my life that I was just like, I didn't know what to say or think. I was just like, I didn't know what to say or think. I was just like, I couldn't process what was happening.

Oh, that's so wonderful. I was really shocked. Marvellous. New dog. I'll put pictures, obviously, in the show notes and people can go and have a look at her. I know everyone says their dogs are cute, right? Yeah. And puppies are just are cute.

And Audrey was very cute. But this dog is exceptionally cute. Like, ridiculous. Yes. And she's going to be very small anyway, but she's very small at the moment. and Audrey was very cute but this dog is exceptionally cute like ridiculous yes and she's going to be very small anyway but she's very small at the moment and we took her out into town in Bristol the other day because we wanted to go to a pet store and do a little bit of shopping and we took her with us it was our first time out in public oh my goodness it was my first insight into what it must be like to be someone really really famous like taylor swift yeah right go out in public because we'd had we were holding her like i was holding her

my wife was holding her up against our chest and she was just this cute little face every single person you walk past just stared at her and smiled and stopped and wanted to talk, wanted to take photos of her. It was crazy. You couldn't go anywhere without people. And you just felt it every time you walked past a group of people or a restaurant with diners. You could see them all looking and pointing

and tapping the person next to them going, God, look, look, look at that, look at that. Like you were a famous person walking past. It was insane. I've never had, you know, Audrey was cute and you got a lot of that with Audrey and stuff. So, you know, but this was like next level. This was like, this honestly made me understand what it must be like to be world famous and everyone looks at you. I can understand that. When you first sent me a photo of, you know, check this out or whatever it was, or maybe it was just the photo that came through,

I honestly asked for clarification. Is that a puppy or like it looks like a little teddy or you know what I mean? Like something cute I'm giving to your son. I needed clarification. It's so cute and small and brown. In fact, if it had been sitting in my ice cream tub I would have assumed she was just another little raisin Lovely Well, so Winnie, there we go More updates to come, no doubt And way too many photos Yes, indeed

She's hard to photograph though Because she's brown and has brown eyes So there's not as much contrast in her face as Audrey had So she doesn't photograph as easily as some dogs She looks a little bit like Would you say if you were to Like you know how in the Mandalorian there's like baby Yoda Yeah

Is this like a less hairy baby Chewbacca Like a really, really, really tiny Chewbacca A lot of people have been saying she looks a bit like Gizmo from Gremlins. Oh yeah, that's right. Yeah. I think she looks like the love child of Yoda and an Ewok. Yes. Yes. Yeah, that

works. I should have gone to the Ewoks actually, that's true. Yeah, it's like a little baby Wiccan. Remember there's that baby Ewok in Return of the Jedi that gets scared during the story? There is a bit of that about her. Oh, Millennium Falcon.

Oh, that's great. That brings me to my idea for a podcast. I decided to have a Valentine's theme podcast. Oh, yes, of course. That's what we were doing. Yes, go ahead. Yeah. So my idea for a

podcast is called it would be a weekly podcast it'd be called my weekly valentine and it's a podcast where you would talk about the thing or preferably the person you have fallen in love with this week who's your what's who do you love and i'm throwing the term love around a bit loosely here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Obviously. I'm not talking proper, proper deep love like Tim and I have. I'm talking like just a more casual love. Who's your crush this week? And I've got one at the moment. I've got a little crush at the moment.

So I thought I'd use that as my example. So if I was doing it this week, I would say my weekly valentine this week is an American footballer called Jason Kelsey. I know this name. How do I know this name? Is that Taylor Swift's partner or no? Well, no, it's close. You're close.

So Jason Kelsey is a center for the Philadelphia Eagles. He's a big fat bearded guy. He's the guy that snaps the ball back to the quarterback and then tries to protect the quarterback. Right. And he is the brother of Travis Kelsey, who is a tight end for the Kansas City Chiefs, who is Taylor Swift's boyfriend. Right. And there's been all this publicity around Taylor Swift going and watching Travis Kelsey. And there was just the Super Bowl that the Kansas City Chiefs won and Taylor Swift was

there and blah, blah, blah. So, Jason Kelsey is his brother, his older brother. They both play in the NFL. Yeah. And very famously, they played against each other in the Super Bowl last year. So, it was called the Kelsey Super Bowl because the two brothers were going head to head. They've also got a podcast together, which is one of the most popular podcasts in all America, which I've only just started listening to. I think it's called New Heights.

And it's them talking about football and stuff. And they're both very kind of larger than life, colorful characters. Cool. stuff and they're both very kind of larger than life colorful characters cool so travis kelsey is the more famous one because of taylor swift and because he's won a whole bunch of super bowls he's won three super bowls and uh so he's sort of as a he's higher profile but his brother is also quite high profile he has won a super bowl he's a he's a good player he's a pro bowl player he's a he's a good footballer but i've just got a crush on him because he's so he's so down to earth and he's such a great character like the best example i can give is before football matches it's a bit of a when all the players arrive at the stadium in american football it's a bit of a fashion parade and they wear all these outlandish outfits yeah

and they i think they look ridiculous but they wear all like designer label stuff and it's all glittery and they've got handbags and they just it's it's ridiculous although they'll be wearing like suits and things like that or just these ridiculous fashion outfits it's just become a bit of a thing in american football it's crazy but jason kelsey won't have a bar of it and he he always just turns up literally in like shorts and a t-shirt and flip-flops yeah right flip-flops he's just super super casual and another thing he does all the time is he loves going to like he loves eating junk food and he's really well known at his local mcdonald's drive-thru they all know him and sometimes he turns up and just as a favour,

he'll give them like, he'll sign like, sign football shirts for them and hand them over at the drive-thru window and pose for pictures with them and stuff. Just at his local Macca's. He's really just, and once his team was out of the season, this season, he started following his brother, like, you know, going to his brother's matches. And his brother plays for another team. But he said, well, Philadelphia's out, you know, going to his brother's matches. And his brother plays for another team.

But he said, well, Philadelphia's out, you know, my team's out. We can't win the Super Bowl. So he just started wearing Kansas City, like, gear and going to his brother's games, like, in the crowd and chugging beers with the fans and taking off his shirt in the freezing cold with his big hairy chest and his fat belly and cheering in the crowd. He's just such, like crowd he's just such like a

he's just such a cool guy and listening to the podcast as well he's kind of like he's like us like he gets into all these little competitions they have and he makes trophies for the listeners and he gets really into all that kind of lore of the podcast type stuff and that he's just like a really down-to-earth guy and i really like him and i know football is really tribal and americans won't some people won't like him because he plays for the eagles and some people don't like the kelseys particularly because of their fame at the moment and all the taylor swift stuff but the brother jason i don't mind travis but he's a bit more showy and a bit more he's a bit more celebrity oriented and a bit more celebrity-oriented and stuff.

He's more of the Brady of the Tim and Brady sort of combination. But Jason, and he's called Jason, my favourite name. Jason Kelsey is my Valentine at the moment. Wow. Wow. Sending out love to Jason Kelsey. Man, how are you going to express it? Are you simply going to talk about it?

Or is in this podcast, do you then send a special valentine podcast gift or heart or card what a great idea what a great idea tim you send a little gift or a card at the end of each episode yeah i mean he gets so much fan mail and mail i don't think i don't know if i want to send jason kelsey valentine but but uh well you never know The podcast I would do it Even as we speak over on his podcast He's recording talking to his brother And saying you know who I really love I've been watching this video

It's Brady Haran he's just a great guy He's got this podcast Makes these math videos Love a bit of math Have you seen Numberphile? It's got a cute little dog. Cute as a button. And Jason Kelsey's wife,

his name is Kylie. That's the same as my wife's name. Wow. So there you go. There you go. Wow. He's got my dream name and he's got my wife

with the same name. There you go. There you go. Living the dream. Yes. Living the dream. Interesting guy. I really like him There you go. Living the dream. Yes. Living the dream. Interesting guy. I really like him.

He's a real great character. Lovely. You've got a crush at the moment, Tim. You've got a recent crush. Someone just recently come into your sphere that you've become a bit infatuated with. Let me just think. You know, I was watching an old crush the other night. I was watching Emma Thompson in the film Remains was watching emma thompson in the film

remains of the day she was a bit of a crush of mine in the 90s i have to say but watching this film remains of the day she stars with anthony hopkins yeah and i have to say i was really quite taken with anthony hopkins he's very very good he plays this butler called mr stevens and he's that classic english butler in fact it's all kind of about his sense of duty and that notion of butlers and their restraint and their sense of duty i really like that trope there's another show that i used to love as a kid called upstairs downstairs and there's a butler in that called Hudson. And I loved Hudson. There's something really honourable about a butler like that, you know.

Downton Abbey really doubles down on that. They have two characters like that, don't they? They have Carson, the butler in Downton Abbey. Oh, yeah. He's the big guy, is that right? He's sort of... Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And there's also the guy who is like, you know,

the Lord of the Manor, whose name I've forgotten, Lord Grantham. Lord Grantham's like personal assistant, the one who helps him put his cufflinks on and stuff like that. He's also a real duty type guy as well. Now, Bates, is that right? Bates, is that his name? Bates, yes, I think you're right. I think you're right.

Yeah, yeah. There you go. Yeah. Bates is always whispering. We watched the first few seasons of that and Bates is always, always whispering, you know, like, oh no, sell Downton. We couldn't do that. That mustn't happen.

It's like, well, you've got no particular influence in this whole matter. He's always whispering seriously. That's a nice trope. So Anthony Hopkins, I was, I was admiring Anthony Hopkins. Anthony Hopkins is your crush. Yes. The very opposite of a down, down to earthth football chest-beating guy in flip-flops, mine's a Mr. Stevens in a tuxedo answering the door with a,

certainly, sir. Just very briefly, let's briefly, I want to go on a brief little side street here before we get back to the show. Speaking of Anthony Hopkins, what do you think of the film Meet Joe Black with Brad Pitt and Anthony Hopkins? You know, I've watched it twice and I sometimes think of it because it's a really, really boring film that I can't stop watching. You know what I mean?

Like it's really slow and nothing much happens, but I'm somehow taken with it. I've watched it twice all the way through. I like it. I've only watched it once or twice too, but I like it. But my phone and my algorithm on Instagram obviously thinks I love it because I'm always being shown clips from it. And probably because I watch them all, it then feeds me more.

But I really like the film. My wife can't stand it, and she thinks it's the most boring film in the history of cinema and it's a real normally we have quite similar taste in films and tv shows but we really go up as our separate ways when it comes to two films meet joe black and the princess bride right yes and um and she And she can't stand it. But I think I like it. It completely captivates me. I also have a bit of a morbid fascination with death, I guess,

and me, Joe Black, is about death as a character. But I think I like it. I like it. I don't think it's a great film, but it's just on the right side of talking about something important in a slow burn kind of way that it keeps me in and it's probably anthony hopkins doing the heavy lifting he's just so good isn't he so captivating it's also brad pitt brad pitt's looks like brad pitt's attractiveness as a man like just getting like he's just like the only like it just really, really depends on him being completely irresistible to women.

He's got, he's at that stage of the 90s where his fluffy hair was just fluffed just perfectly, wasn't it? Like, it's just windswept. You know, like his hair's just fallen just right every single time. Yeah. Yeah. What's that other film about the brothers where he's kind of like a cowboy and he's just ridiculously good looking and has long hair and it's just like, oh, that's not even realistic being that attractive. Oh, Legends of the Fall.

Yeah. Legends of the Fall. He's like, and like there's that woman that meets these handsome brothers and then he just comes on the scene and it's like, oh, God, this is ridiculous. Even I'd hook up with Brad Pitt in that film. Yeah, he's just sort of leaning back on the album, on the DVD cover, the movie poster,

just leaning back on a particular angle and he could do no wrong in that scene. I mean, because in Meet Joe Black, he plays death, right? Well, yeah, but he plays a guy whose body death inhabits yeah but it's a bit like look if brad pitt's death kill me now like yeah but like like death wants to experience what it's like to be a human and it chooses a body and it chooses brad pitt's body so it kills brad pitt and takes over his body um like you would pick that wouldn't you if you want to have

a good time on earth for a few weeks you're gonna pick brad pitt's body anyway how do we get onto that oh mr stevens that's right anthony hopkins you're you're at your crush on anthony hopkins you probably want to meet joe black and think, I wouldn't mind a bit of Anthony Hopkins. Let's move on to some parish notices. Oh, indeed. I want to revisit these crackers, these biscuits from Australia called Shapes. And there were all sorts of different flavors of these

things and we talked about them because tim had been eating barbecue shapes when he had his hospital emergency there was no connection between the two but we made a connection so so we talked about four flavors in particular the the barbecue shape the pizza shape the chicken crimpy and my personal favorite the savory shape and i asked people to rank those four in order and and a number of people got back to us and i want to say thank you to everyone who did on reddit and email and places like that and i put all your rankings into a spreadsheet to see what the favorite flavor of shape was of those four and by far and away the winner was tim do you want to have a guess what the winner was surely it's barbecue shapes surely it was the pizza shape it was the pizza shape by some distance followed by the barbecue shape and then the chicken crimpy just edged out

the savory shape and the savory shape was lastoury shape is my favourite by a long way. And I have to say, there was not a lot of love for it. In fact, there was a bit of hostility towards the savoury shape. People were really down on it. But I don't mind because I think the savoury shape is the more grown up. It's for the more defining palate. And I think the pizza shape is for the kids. Like when I was a kid, the pizza shape was my favourite.

I think the pizza shape is a kid's biscuit. It's a kid's shape. Whereas when you mature, you know, like learning to appreciate fine wine, I think the savoury shape is for the more discerning palate. And if you're a pizza shape kind of person, I think that's on you. I'm not judging you. I'm not being snobby but i am judging you somewhere in the other side of the world anthony hopkins is sitting at home in his tuxedo he's not

reaching for a pizza shape he's reaching for um a savory is that right you can picture him in his distinguished he's a savory shape right yeah all right anthony hopkins would be a savior now i asked him to get a box of savoryoury shapes on the way to the office to recording so that he could try them because he said he couldn't remember what savoury shapes tasted like. Tim, being the thorough preparer that he is, bought like eight boxes of shapes, eight different flavours, including our four canonical ones plus four other ones.

But, Tim, I just wanted to see what you thought of the savoury shapes. Oh, okay. You've got them there. I saw your message and I thought it was like grab a cup. So, anyway, and then on the way out the door. I don't mind you. other ones but tim i just wanted to see what you thought of the savory shape oh okay i thought i saw your message and i thought it was like grab a cup and so anyway and then on the way out the door i don't mind you i mean i don't mind you tasting the others you know you do what you want but i i just wanted to see what you thought of the savory shape you got a box of those there well i've got piles of of shapes boxes here it's starting to look like your lego collection to be honest um but let me dig down to

the savories yeah you want me to open these up and try these in particular i'll do it with my fresh palette straight off the bat yeah yeah tim's opening up the box he's opened the cardboard box now he's opening the silvery bag inside he's reaching in hmm well they look a bit funny For a savoury shape Here we go I'm putting it on my tongue Alright

There's nothing to that That's bland It's subtle It's a bit too subtle The other ones are in a salt the other ones are so coated in powder and chemicals and seasoning the savory shape is like beautiful nah that does nothing that's like that's that's like i i one of the other shapes after you've licked it all the savoring and then you're like, oh, yeah, okay, I'll eat it now. And that's just all that's left.

After you've licked all the seasoning off. Yeah. Class. That's actually what they are, man. They have people who lick the seasoning off shapes, and that's what savoury shapes are. They then put them back in a box and sell them. They make the other flavours and then...

Oh, goodness. The savoury shape isn't covered in powder and bits of fake cheese and stuff. It's a classy shape. What does your heart... As you look at all those other boxes, what's your heart like? If you were just at home and those boxes were all sitting in your cupboard, which I presume they will be in an hour or two, which one would you reach for?

We always have at least two of the barbecue shapes, right? So that's the familiar one. That's the one that calls to you all the time. If I was to eat any other one of these, I actually don't like – sorry, it's not that I don't like the pizza shapes, and can I just say that the guy at the checkout at the supermarket tonight put a vote in for the pizza shape. Okay.

Of course. I turned up with all the boxes at the counter and sat them down. He goes, oh, you're going the full rainbow tonight. And he was a pizza shape man. And I love it because he goes, are you going to a party or something? And I said, no, it's for a podcast. And he didn't go, oh, that's on you. He just goes, oh, yeah, no, that makes sense, like tasting them.

Fourth guy tonight. Fourth podcaster tonight buying the full range of savoury shapes. Totally across it, cash as you like. And he goes, it's pizza, mate. That's my favourite. But I don't like pizza because I don't like the purple. It's too strong a colour. I remember when it was introduced. You mean the box?

The box, yeah. You mean the colour of the box? That's right. So I don't want to go anywhere near them. I just don't like the colour. The other flavour that I like out of these is the chicken crimpy. The chicken crimpy I find not pleasant in the mouth though. It's very dry. It's a bit big

and quite a dry biscuit. Let me check. Hang on. It's very dry. It's a bit big and quite a dry biscuit. Let me check. Hang on. It's not a pleasant eat. It tastes salty and chickeny. And I don't like, yeah, it's quite a crumbly dry biscuit compared to the kind of cracker the other ones are. No, that's great. That's good. You like it? You like it? Yeah. Yeah, alright. I feel like it's a different meal to the barbecue shape. Like it's different enough, but it's good taste.

All right. Yeah. All right. I'll tell you what I have got here as well, which I know we both don't endorse, is a Vegemite flavoured novelty one. I've never tasted one of those. Are the biscuits shaped like Australia? Yeah, they are.

Yeah. I have no interest in opening that i love vegemite but again i don't like anything that's infused with vegemite onto other things all right well maybe we'll come back to this at a later date but there we go the people have spoken savory shapes thumbs down from the public but they have captured my heart and always will hang on i'm just going to open the barbecue shapes before we keep going. Tim's having an absolute banquet of shapes here. While you do that, Tim, I've got some more messages from listeners. Oh, yeah. From the civilians.

Tim had an idea in the last podcast about having your bubble burst, and we've had some people get in touch we heard from kerja vakissa i think that's how you say it my bubble was burst when i saw the mona lisa live it was so much smaller i had imagined it as the big picture the placement in the louvre wasn't helping that small painting hanging in the huge room made it look tiny hang on there you go first person to say that let me swallow him's just washing can i can i can i just say on on that specific topic you actually helpfully prepared me for it seeing the mona lisa because you know you have the mona lisa in your mind and then typically everyone says, well, in my mind, you said to me,

oh, did you know it's actually quite small? And I remember you once said this in the schoolyard at school and another time my trivial pursuit, it came up. And so in my mind, I'd actually reduced it down to something like somewhere between, you know, an A4 piece of paper and a postage stamp. And so when we got to the Louvre, I was actually astonished by, oh, look look it's actually quite big that was my first instinct that's my story that's how I described the Mona Lisa

thinking it was going to be really small and saying it was bigger than I expected well that was my experience when I was talking to you in the schoolyard yeah I hadn't I had never seen it in real life no that's right telling you oh it's very small it's much smaller because my grandmother always told me it was very small yes yes so. So I probably had prepared you for it to be small. Yes. But I too, when I finally saw it for real, thought, oh, it's a decent size, decent size painting. So we were both misled by your grandmother.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. The Banjo Lady said, a bubble burst for me when as an adult I learned French and realised that the lively, happy little childhood song, Allouet, I don't know how you say that. Allouet, gentil Allouet. It's some famous French song.

Translates as, Lark, you lovely lark, I am going to pluck all your feathers out. I haven't really recovered. Sorry if I burst your bubble bubble i meant to look up that song before i read that to remind myself what song it was but i'm sure it's some jaunty song we all know bc me bc me says i had something similar i met my wife in russia and while learning the language i found out that the famous opera house, the Bolshoi Theatre, just means big theatre. Oh, right.

And Tommy H said, Hi, Tim and Brady. On the most recent episode, you talked about having a bubble burst. This very thing happened to me when I travelled to the Grand Canyon in Arizona back in 2021. He went with his girlfriend. It had been on my bucket list for years and this seemed like the perfect opportunity to cross an item off the list.

The trip was great, and I spent quality time with my girl, but as we approached the south rim and gazed out for the first time, I was slightly disappointed and realised it was really just a big hole in the ground. My bubble was burst. I'm sure if I had more time or spent a couple of days camping, hiking, it would have been more fun. But looking out across the canyon after such a long trip was one of the biggest bubble bursts i've ever experienced grand canyon three out of ten wow golly have you seen the grand canyon no i have

and i was impressed yeah i was like oh my goodness i didn't think it was going to be this big everything everyone who has been has told me the same as what you're saying it's grand yeah yeah yeah it's like it's a reverse mona lisa that's right well no mona lisa was bigger than i expected too so it's the same as the same as the mona lisa not the same it's not the same size as the mona lisa but it has the same effect uh and one other bit of uh parish notices i just want to touch on the million dollar podcast oh yes yes that we that we dreamed up and revealed last episode i have made it a reality people have been making some submissions to it have you had a listen to the latest incarnation tim i have i have it's it's it's like hearing the whole culture fantastic there's noises and then there's silence and there's people talking and then

there's singing and oh it's fantastic yeah we've got pets purring babies babbling messages of love coded messages with beeps and boops that i don't fully understand uh samples of people's music that they want to share a juggling show uh a guy called dan wrote a song to promote a science fiction trilogy of novels that he wrote um i thought that was sufjan stevens singing actually he sort of sings his contribution so um it's not too late if you want to submit something if you want to buy some airtime on the million dollar podcast we still have 999 495 seconds remaining so you can you can still get in there uh i'll put a link in the show notes uh and can i also say this is this is an actual like functional message here yeah because a lot of people have bought time like they've bought five seconds or they've bought

10 seconds or 30 seconds and i send them an email about how to like just the nuts and bolts of just submitting the audio to me. Yeah. And they haven't submitted it yet. And I'm worried and I have heard that some of these emails I'm sending are going to junk mail or going into spam folders and that. Right. So, if you have already bought time on the Million Dollar Podcast, I will have emailed you. So, go and check your junk mail.

Go and check it out. Go and find the email because a lot of you have bought time and i'm waiting for your audio so i can bolt it in there and have it as part of the the collection but i haven't heard from you or maybe you are just biding your time deciding what to do with your seconds that's okay but just in case if you've bought time check your junk mail and if you buy time in the future check your junk mail because i do email you soon after and then i'll hear from you cool your your daughters haven't submitted anything yet i've noticed uh no haven't they certainly they haven't no asked me about it um we've chatted about it but they haven't you know contacted you so no okay well that's good

hanging on to their pocket money, are they? Yes. I'm glad they're not recording anything around the house to send in. That's a good thing. Hmm. Let's come to the part of the show where we send prizes to our Patreon supporters. Tim, you had an idea last episode. You said we should follow the lead of the Oscars and the Academy Awards and awards and have like nominees yes and then from the nominees we give the prizes so i've changed the way we do it this week i have tweaked the algorithm i've generated 10 nominees from our

patreon supporters and then three of them will get prizes oh wow which i'm not sure this is a good idea it almost feels like lifting someone's hopes and then dashing their dreams in one fell swoop. But we'll do it once and we'll see how it goes. Right. Okay. So, Tim, we'll do a drum roll and get in your best Oscars voice. Do you want to tell us who the nominees are? Well, generally the people doing the nominations come out and do a little bit of awkward banter first.

Should we do a little bit of, you know, there should be a now, you know, star of the Tim and the Unmade podcast. Star of the Unmade. I've got the giggles now. You know what the podcast is called, don't you? Okay, just checking. Star of the Tim show. Oh, sorry, no, that's just what I call it in my head.

Star of the Unmade podcast, Tim Hine, and from the remains of the day, Anthony Hopkins. And then the band goes, we walk out in my lovely ballroom gown. Okay, here we go. Well, awkward banter. And then the nominees are Kare from Denmark. Jared from Greystains in New South Wales. Alan from Sweden.

Francis from Portland. Brad from West Virginia. Daniel from Virginia. Please hold your applause until we've read all the names. Katie from Kentucky. Sam from Virginia. Please hold your applause until we've read all the names. Katie from Kentucky. Sam from Michigan. Ben from Leicestershire. Lyle from Louisiana.

I hope it's Lyle just because it's Lyle from Louisiana. Sounds fantastic. I want to say it again. I like to think of all 10 of them at the moment being like in sort of split screen and all 10 of them are there like looking hopeful and trying to not look disappointed when they lose. So of those 10, only three are about to be named as winners. Tim, have you got any tips or personal favourites

before we announce the winners? I'll put in a bit. Jared from New South Wales, I guess, because he's an Aussie, maybe. But look, look, I think they're all ten wonderful nominees and they all should be very proud. It was an honour just to be nominated. Just to be nominated. Well, it might be an honour just to be nominated,

but there can only be three winners. Right. It might be an honour just to be nominated But there can only be three winners The leather key ring The Unmade Podcast Australian nut leather key ring Is going to Katie from Kentucky

Oh congratulations Katie That's a well deserved Plan the music at the FanFest Hugs and kisses and all sorts. Katie, you've only got 90 seconds for your speech, right? 90 seconds. Katie from Kentucky is going to go straight out and buy some Kentucky Fried Chicken to celebrate.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. The souvenir spoon, the unmade podcaster spoon, goes to Francis from Portland. Oh, Francis, congratulations. That's a fantastic victory. Well done.

Oh, well, this is... And the collector cards, the Spoon of the Week collector cards are going to go to... Alan from Sweden. Oh, congratulations, Alan. Alan. Fantastic.

And now this is where the voiceover person would say, this is the second week in a row that Alan has won collector cards from the Unmade podcast. And it actually is. So well done, Alan. And all the other, there are seven other nominees who are forcing a smile and clapping very, very hard, a little overcompensating

and they're clapping like they're super happy for the other people to have won but um so kare jared brad daniel sam ben elio you get nothing maybe they'll do better at the golden globes oh no, the Golden Globes are before the Oscars Yes, oh gosh Yeah, I don't know what they get You get to go to the after party A little back of goodies maybe And because you're Patreon supporters

You actually do get to go to the after party Because we do the request room after show Which will be available to Patreon supporters afterwards And we have lots of great questions That we're going to be dealing with in the request room this week, Tim. I can't wait to get to it. Good stuff.

All sorts of stuff about, what have we got? We've got music, skiing, watches, VR headsets, Formula One, food, books, all sorts of interesting questions that we're going to be answering. But before we do that, I'm afraid we have to sit through Tim's idea for a podcast.

All right. Brace yourselves, people. You know how a lot of podcasts are designed to be easy to listen to and interesting? My podcast is a little bit different to that. This podcast idea... It's called the Unmade Podcast. If anyone's still listening certainly Lyle, Ben, Sam, Daniel are not listening

they're all gone they're thrown their device on the floor and my podcast idea is is it is a tough cookie right it's a really difficult podcast. It's almost like resistance training, resistance training to make. It's called Not a Podcast About Nots. Okay. Not a Podcast About Nots. I'm not saying it's not a podcast about nots. I'm saying it's not a podcast about knots i'm saying it's not a podcast about knots let's say like not hyphen correct podcast about yes or colon or colon indeed yes capital a

a podcast about knots okay and if this falls flat i have written a theme tune to you know play in a few minutes on time on the guitar because I'm pretty... Are we talking knots with a K here, as in knots that we tie? That's correct. This is a podcast about knots, which I think... I mean, knots are fascinating, and I was reading up on knots the other day, and, you know, when I do a little bit of prep for the podcast, it doesn't tend to go very well,

but I found out two pieces of information that I thought you would find both interesting and that you probably already know yeah one is that there are six billion knots right an estimated six billion knots and the reason for this is because once you stop and think about it mathematically apparently there's sort of in one sense no end to the kinds of knots you can do most of them aren't very common the one that we use to tie our shoelaces that is very common right but there's lots of them that aren't but theoretically you can tie as many you know what i mean you can make your own knots you can keep trying to make

knots that goes on forever so there's six billion knots and that was a new thought for me but but you know yeah a lot of things are a new thought for me but when it comes to different types of knots there's about 15 sort of 15 so another name for this podcast could be 15 knots but yeah i like the idea of a podcast where you're explaining and exploring the origins of different knots as well as explaining to people how to tie the knot on the podcast and that's the resistance training bit right in audio form okay so now take that take that little end that you just put under the the round bit and slip it through the hole that should be to the left of the second hole that's right that kind of thing that's right that's right so people actually listen to the podcast and learn to tie a knot and i think tying knots or being able to tie a few different

knots i think is one of those sort of unsaid status symbols of what masculinity is apparently about like real men know how to tie like everyone learns how to tie their shoelaces right but real men you know you're faced with like having to tie something to your car they know exactly what to do yeah so i actually there's a whole range of different knots some are appropriate and not appropriate for that and obviously there's you know you go to sea apparently sailors spend all day every day just tying knots and undoing them but yeah i actually like this podcast is an exploration of all these different knots and you actually learn how to tie a knot.

Some of the knots have a really interesting history. Some of them have all sorts of lore attached to them and come from different industries. And they obviously, lots of them have really fun and interesting names that are kind of colloquial. Like the shearer's shank that comes out of Central Australia with the sheeping industry and all sorts of stuff. So that's it. Knot. I like this, i like this podcast about knots i like it tim and it was only and you know i mean it has been since episode 137 that you talked about your passion for wanting to be able to tie knots so it's we're about you to talk about knots again when did we talk about have we talked about knots before yeah luckily we have our good friend who keeps the database for us and i just checked and episode 137 you talked about knots i just corrected myself it was episode 133 i misread the spreadsheet

because episode 133 is on row 137 of the spreadsheet so that's episode 133 how to wear a leather jacket but we didn't have a podcast idea about not. Yeah, I don't think it was a full-blown podcast idea. Yeah, I think, yeah. Yeah, I don't think you pitched it as a full podcast idea. So I'm not poo-pooing your idea. And in fact, I like this idea. I like this idea as an unmade podcast idea.

As in it remains unmade. Right. But it's funny and fun to talk about. I can't see it being a success. It'd be a great YouTube channel. I can't see it being a successful podcast, but it could be quite relaxing. It could be a good sleep podcast. There is a lot of interesting history with knots.

I have a lot of experience with knots mathematically. I've made a lot of mathematical videos about knots on Numberphile. Really? Yeah. Yeah, they are very mathematical objects. Yeah, so I have made more knot videos than you would expect. But I don't know a lot about real knots, like seafaring stuff and all that sort of stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, I say real knots. They're actually not real knots because the ends aren't joined, but that's a whole other story. Yeah, I think this is a fun idea. And I find knots fascinating. i'm terrible at them as i've said before i can't even not the end of a balloon properly i'm terrible at tying my own shoelaces no that's right i remember talking about the balloon i would probably benefit from some uh some knot theory yeah are you a good knot tire you are good at knots are you or you just you you? Or do you know the basics? No, no.

It's something a bit like fly fishing that I feel like I should know and would like to know, but I don't know a lot of them. I'm reasonably successful at making something work, but I'm not a purist in some people are. I remember you talking about being unable to tie knots when you wanted to tie things to the top of the car and stuff. Yeah, yeah, that's right. I mean, it was all the way back in episode 137,

so I don't blame you for not remembering. You are the master at not remembering what's been happening on the podcast before. It is like a skill. There are several people in my church who have an encyclopedic knowledge of what happens on the podcast and I need to use them a bit more as a reference point. But there's a website.

I'll send you a link. There's a website. Is that still updated, though? Yeah, it is updated. What a legend. Wow. We must consider him for colonelship at some stage. That is a fair effort.

I thought that ran out. I like the idea of naming these episodes, right? A bit like the episodes of Friends. You know how they name yeah the friends episodes you know the one with the coffee and the one where we go shopping and the one where chandler does this yeah i like this idea of not podcast being enabled you know the one with the two loopy bits that tie around and the one the one where you could go that you could go that way or you could go a more obvious way and a way that works well and that is use real names of the knots because knots have

cool names like half hitch anchor hitch bow line alpine butterfly knots have cool names so each one you have the blood knot the clinch knot bunt line hitch the diamond hitch yeah the trucker's hitch oh that sounds handy that one the trucker's hitch. Ooh, that sounds handy, that one. The trucker's hitch. That's probably the one I need for tying stuff. There's lots of good knots. The cobra. The cobra.

That's a classic. A constructor knot. Overhand. I love the knot where someone like... A double turtle knot. They put something in... It's a real knot. I'm looking at pictures of all these knots. I believe you.

I believe you. I believe you. I believe you. I believe you. Although I do think that maybe men in different countries have different names for things. They might have local names for things. I'm putting men in abbreviation, you know, like in quotation marks. Yeah, quote marks. Yeah, I think they might have colloquial and local names for things. Like, you know, like a shearer's ditch is known also as like a shepherd's wand when you're in Britain. You know, that kind of thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Would you like to hear my theme song for Not a podcast about knots? Nah. Nah. Don't want to hear it. Come on, then. Come on. Let's hear it.

Are you going to play the guitar? I am going to play the guitar. Yeah. All right. Here we go. Here we go. Can you hear the guitar? I can now.

I just changed a button, so first time ever I can. You may regret that decision. You ready? Here we go. I'm ready. Yep. I should have started with this, because I think this is the real winner. This is better than the idea itself.

All right, here we go. Not Ears, a podcast all about nuts not is a podcast all about nuts not is not a podcast not about nuts is that great or what not what i was expecting it's not what i was expecting i was expecting something i wanted something more i was expecting something more relaxing because I thought this was going to be a relaxing podcast. And you've kind of hit me with your rock and roll. But that's okay. I like that. You're going against my expectations.

And I appreciate that. Let's hear it again. I want to hear it one more time. Hang on, hang on. I could play a more melodic version maybe. Maybe I could tone it down a little bit. It might need a little bit of work for season two or something. Not is a podcast all about knots.

Not is a podcast all about knots. Not is not a podcast not about knots. Hang on, but it is about knots, isn't it? No, that's right, but it's not not about knots. See, there's a trick on the last line. Ah. Yeah. Ah, okay. Not is not a podcast, not about knots.

Ah, yeah, I get you. Yeah. Maybe I should flip it. Maybe I should do the not, not bit for the first two and then finish on the it is a pod. So, um. Not ears, not a podcast, not about nuts. Not ears, not a podcast, not about nuts.

Not ears, a podcast all about nuts. There we go. That's it. That's the money one. That's it. Yeah, There we go. That's it. That's the money one. That's it. Yeah, you got it. You got it. Well done. I knew workshopping it a little bit would be good.

There we go. Yeah, you got it. You got it. And on that note, Tim and I are going to leave you all and retire to the request room where Patreon supporters can come and hear us answer a really interesting bunch of questions. I'm looking forward to this one.

So if you're a Patreon supporter, go to patreon.com slash unmade FM, or if you've already figured out how to make the request room appear in your podcast feed, well done. Uh, cause you can do that. Uh,

but you can also just go and listen to it on the Patreon page and we'll have some more chat. See you there. I'll bring the barbecue shapes. Tim's you See you there. I'll bring the barbecue shapes. Tim's. You got the barbecue shapes. I'm just going to have to look at the savory shapes from thousands of miles away.