The Unplanned Podcast with Matt & Abby - Getting an IUD, Losing My Period & Having an Identity Crisis

Episode Date: November 1, 2023

This episode is sponsored by Lume & Dreamland Baby Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get $5 off your Starter Pack (that's over 40% off) with promo code UNPLANNED at lumepodcast.com #lumepod Go to dreamlandbabyco.com and enter UNPLANNEDBOGO23 at checkout for the BUY ONE GET ONE FREE weighted products deal! Abby got an IUD for the 2nd time. In this episode, we talked about Abby's experiences with birth control, the possibility of Mat getting a vasectomy and Abby's identity crisis as someone who married and had kids young. Make sure to rate our podcast and leave a review if you can, it really helps us out! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

So my legs are in the stir-ups and it does feel comfortable because that area is not touched ever You feel like a little like a there's like probably no chance I'll get a period which actually is not it's not uncommon But it's not the most common thing. I'm fully trusting that you have an IUD right now Could have just walked into the office pretended that you went to an appointment. We're all I know I know what if I did that honestly? I have no idea because the strings are really pokey when you first get it You're getting a vasectomy when you think would be a good? When we're sure we're not gonna have any more kids. I do feel like I kind of have an identity crisis. Ooh, in the world would I be?

Had I not gotten married so young? What would I do with my adult life if it wasn't for you? Like you've changed my food habits, my hobbies, my career. What's up dudes? And welcome back to the unplanned podcast. Woohoo! We are back to go ride horses here in an hour and a half. There's no way we're gonna make it on time.

You don't think we're gonna make it? There's just too much to be done. I think if we cram, we can make it happen. Well, you're gonna have to tell Augie to eat faster. That's true. Doesn't need to take from my 30 minutes. 30 minutes? How long does it usually take to feed? Yeah, like 30 to 40 minutes. Oh, okay. Maybe we won't make it on time.

We're definitely not going to. We rode horses last time on the shore of Bannon, Oregon, which is like Southern Oregon. It was beautiful with my first ever writing horse. So I thought it'd be fun to do a day. That was when I was freshly pregnant. And apparently you're not supposed to write a horse in your pregnant. Yes, you. I mean, you can probably...

You're not supposed to. You're definitely not supposed to write a horse in your pregnant. Maybe it's not recommended. We just had no idea. And we were just so nude to it, like we had just found out we were pregnant. So it didn't seem like... I was probably like seven weeks pregnant We didn't even like think of it But I'm pretty sure when you're early in pregnancy

That's when it's most dangerous to do activities like that I think I think it's all about the placenta and it getting detached from the In the baby, so I'm pretty sure that was kind of a heat I don't know. I'm not a doctor really slow with him. I did not go fast But that was really fun rusty. I don't know. I'm not a doctor. Well, they really slow with him. I did not go fast. We did. But that was really fun. Super fun. And you were so happy.

It was your birthday. It was like a really fun. We actually vlogged that on our YouTube channel. That was like one of the best days of my life. It was so fun. Really? Yeah. Oh, I love that.

I remember, I thought you looked so hot in your outfit. I remember that. I kept taking pictures of you. I was like, you look so good. That night we took a bump picture and I was like seven weeks pregnant. And we also got in the hot tub and took a video to then post just to throw people off because we were teasing that you were pregnant but then like people didn't really know yet.

Well, the hot tub was like on 90, it was like body temperature water. Yeah, we looked it up. We made sure it was less than our body temperature that way it wasn't gonna be safe. I mean, that way it wasn't gonna be unsafe, I'm sorry, for the baby. Right. That was fun. So yeah, that way it wasn't gonna be unsafe, I'm sorry, for the baby. So, that was fun.

So yeah, we're writing horses again today on a day, and I'm very excited. I did not realize though, when I planned this, that it was the same day that Abby was getting an IUD. And I am so sorry about that. I, so, but if it's not too late to cancel though, we can still cancel it if you're not feeling up to it. I think it'll be fine.

But you've had two IUDs now. That's insane. Sorry, I'm so tired right now. It makes sense, I mean, you're breastfeeding, so I think you have a valid excuse. What do they say like breastfeeding's like, how much energy is expended? Oh crap, I think, don't they say you have to eat like 500

more calories a day? Yeah. To help with that. So you'd have to do a crazy workout to burn 500 calories. Yeah, so that's what I'm doing on top of working out So I'm exhausted. You're the one that encourages me to go to the gym. Really? Yes. I don't tell you to go to the gym I would not go as much well because when you go I'm like Ah Abby's going to the gym. I actually go to the shit. Yeah. Yeah, that's exactly what it is I'm definitely not down to my pre-prognancy weight though. That does not matter. That's not my goal of working out.

On the truthfully. Hot take weight does not matter. It's about how you feel. It's about like you could have a ton of muscle. Like say a woman might be like, oh, she's heavier, but it's really because she's muscular, right? Like muscle weighs more than fat. So I think people put weight too much emphasis

on their weight and you're very muscular. So you're gonna weigh more than petite women. Your size, because you're just. Oh, I'm not excited about my weight at all. It's just I would have thought that I'd be closer to my pre-pregnancy weight at this point. And so yeah, I mean, maybe this is my message to all those women.

You can literally work out your entire pregnancy, eat right. I mean, let's be honest, I had a couple extra big little bites during pregnancy, but I didn't go crazy. Wouldn't you agree? I wasn't eating snacks all the time. And then I got back to working out as soon as I was safe because I wanted to. And I'm still not at my pre-pregnancy weight.

So I mean, all that to say that you can do all those. And I'm nursing. That's the other thing too. I'm still not there. And I'm totally okay with that. If you don't feel like your body's bouncing back or if something that I've posted makes it look like, I've already gotten to my pre-pregn pregnancy state. That's not the case at all.

You think you're gonna nurse for six months, nine months a year? Like what are you thinking? I think my goal is always six months with the understanding that once I get to six months, it's so much easier because then at least for our first, he did not want to nurse nearly as much. And so I just kept nursing him and we never had to give him formula So I'm thinking we'll probably get to it almost a year with Ogi too But by the end of nursing that remember how chill it was like we would do it like twice a day like once in the morning once before bed I think the convenience of like stopping nursing early is that you have more flexibility as a couple So if you want to take a day trip or something

I mean, I guess you could pump right like? Like if we took a day trip somewhere, I will say pumping is such a hassle sometimes. Yeah. You take that stuff on an airplane and across the country, like it just kind of... Is it a hassle for you, babe? Not a hassle for me. I'm not complaining.

I'm just, you know, I almost feel like I'm... It takes away. Yeah, it takes away from... I have an internal clock going in my brain of like, okay, wait, when was the last time I pumped? I need to be careful. And then I get stressed out about like, oh my pumping enough milk, am I doing it for a long enough? Like things like that. As a partner though, it's kind of like you almost bare the weight of it a little bit too. Not as much, obviously it's way easier to be the man and not have to be the one pumping milk out of your breasts.

But yeah, there's definitely like a shared load in a way I would say in general I think it's probably easier to be a man. Yeah, I'll be honest. Yeah, probably is I do actually think that I mean think about it You weren't spreading a lot the doctor today. That's true. Get in zap. Let's talk about it You've had you've had two IUDs now. Okay, you have I have when you got the original IUD I think my mom was a little worried because there was this whole scare back in the day where women, like the OG IUDs, I think they've, they've, they've, F's women up, like they were really bad. Women lost her fertility. I want to say people might have died. Like they were, I don't know if this is like in the 80s or what not, but it was a while back before we have the modern day IUDs. And so I think

we had mentioned to some people that you were getting one, and they were scared for you. Really? Do you remember that? No. We were about to get married. We were in 2021. Why did you choose that initially?

Well, we met with someone about all the birth control options. That's right, I forgot about that. My mom's friend. Yeah. That was so funny. My mom was like, hey, my friend knows a lot about birth control, and she would love to meet with you.

And she's very, very, it was, you know, really sweet lady for my mom's office. My mom's an engineer. So it was one of her fellow croak workers at- Well, because doesn't she help like, women find options for birth control? Oh, I forgot. She had some background in it and I totally forget

what it was, but she walked us through like, all the different options. Yeah, because she volunteered at like, some type of women's clinic. A women's clinic or something. Yeah, so that was like, really nice of her to do that for us. Oh, it was and it was, but she walked us through all the different options. Because she volunteered at some type of win-ins. A women's clinic or something. Yeah, so that was really nice of her to do that for us. Oh, it was, and it was really informative. And I think she was totally not biased.

Yeah. She just gave us the information on all of our options and how effective they were and possible side effects and all that stuff. And it was really, really helpful. And then after that conversation, I don't know if I went into that conversation thinking I'm gonna get in IUD but afterwards I was like I think that's the best option for us because we were still in college

We were still so young and we just knew we didn't want to get pregnant right away Let's be honest if you would have been on the pill I feel like we would have gotten pregnant within the first month of being married Because you forget to take pills all the time. Yeah. You're so forgetful with that stuff. Like the vitamins thing is even hard for me. Oh gosh. No, because with pregnancy, you'd forget to take pills that you needed to take while you were pregnant for days.

And then you'd feel horrible. Like iron or something. Oh yeah, iron. And you'd feel so exhausted. Like why don't I, and you're like, oh wait a second. I'm gonna take my iron in like three days. Yeah. Yeah, I was in the first pregnancy

and so I needed to take iron and I would forget and I would like poop out and be like, ah yeah, it's been like three days. And you can't really do that with birth control because for perfect use, you need to take it like at the same time every day. I all of a sudden got a little worried about talking about birth control

because I know it's a sensitive topic. Oh, we should probably give it disclaimer like right about now. We are not doctors. We are not doctors. Not even semi close. We are influencers. Google starts at best. And we. But what we are experts on is our own experiences. Yes, that's right. That is what I will. That's right. Yes. Anyway, so we met with that woman and we were, I think both of us, but mostly me because it is kind of mostly my decision. Obviously family

planning is a joint decision, but the route we choose for birth control more might as well. Would that be nice when men can, I mean, obviously dudes can wear condoms, but like, when there's like a device, a dude can get, or some sort of, I don't know, a pill, there's a pill for men. I would meant to shoot something into you. I wish I could. I want to take on part of the responsibility here,

you know what I'm saying? But it kind of sucks it all relies on the women. I wonder how that happened. Is it anatomy? Is it easier to make a pill for women to, you know, do you know what I actually think would be way easier to make men sterile than to make women sterile? Well that would make more sense.

Because we have one or two days a month where we are very fertile. Whereas men are the same fertility all. What doesn't that be the opposite though? Because if you only have a couple days window then just fighting it for those days would be easier than fighting a dude's, like, you know. No, because you have to fight every single day,

even though we're only fertile for today. But then for a guy, it would be every day though. You know what I'm saying? easier than fighting a dude's like, you know. No, because you have to fight every single day, even though we're only fertile for today. But then for a guy would be every day though. You know what I'm saying? As they should. Wait, what are you confused about? I just got confused. I don't even care.

Anyway, IUD, you decided on that. I got the Kylina because I hadn't had babies yet, and so they recommended that one for me. I think it's a slightly lower hormone dose, but mostly it's a smaller device. And I remember you watched all these YouTube videos before I watched a couple. And you were a little scared,

because the videos share some freaky stuff. They're like, it's the worst pain I was ever in my life. It was, you know, this, I was like screaming. Like people would share the craziest stuff when it came to IUD insertion There's a lot of stories. I'm sure people not on time out on TikTok. I probably on Reddit. What was your first YouTube? Yeah, what was your first experience? I went by myself Because we weren't married and so I was like

Well, that wasn't you won't even let your mom go though you want to tell yourself even know... She didn't even know about it. Your best friend, Morgan, didn't go with you. She was busy. I think you asked her to, right? I think I asked her to, and she was busy. Yeah. Anyway, it wasn't a big deal. I went by myself, and they had a nurse come in, and she... Her main job was literally just to hold my hand.

Wow. I was like, okay. And they were like, they kind of like warned me when they were gonna do it. So my legs are in the stir-ups. And they're down there. The first thing they put in, I'm pretty sure, is something to measure down there. Oh, God.

And it was like, is it a super long needle looking thing? Kind of, yeah. And it doesn't feel comfortable. I mean, even when they clean it, it doesn't feel comfortable because that area is not touched ever. Do they use, what's the thing called that they like put in there and then they open it? Yeah,'t feel comfortable because that area is not touched ever. Do they use what's the thing called that they like put in there and then they open it?

Yeah, speculum. That's the first thing. That doesn't even really hurt that much. It's more like uncomfortable. Really? Then they go in there and do some cleaning thingy. Then they stick something in there to clamp it. That doesn't feel good at all.

That makes you bleed because they clamp on your cervix. Oh. So they clamp it and then they measure it or maybe you measure first and much more and then they like tell you like, okay here it comes and that's the best thing about it is that it is so quick. Like I mean from the time they put the speculamin to the time they took it out it took five minutes. But you're only really feeling pain for like 30 seconds. But you're only really feeling pain for like 30 seconds. You can take anything for 30 seconds, ladies. I mean, seriously, we can do it.

And so by first time, the nurse is like holding my hand and she's just like, okay, here it comes. And then I literally, I don't even remember it very well, but it was just like a cramp, like, outch. And I might have flinched or something. And then it was all done. And I had light bleeding for like a cramp like ouch and I might have flinched or something and then it was all done and I had light bleeding for like a month and you drove home by yourself and I drove home and I was totally fine they were worried about you driving home afterward right they kind of thought I should have brought a buddy but I didn't need one

I really didn't need one and that was right before we got married and then I asked the nurse today I was like do most people bring their husband to them? And she's like, no, most people come alone. Really? Yeah. Really? Yeah. Because I felt kind of bad that I was chilling in the parking lot today and just waiting for you. Like I, I felt like I needed to go back there and hold your hand. She said, a lot of people come alone. Really? Yeah. I mean, once you've had a baby, you're kind of like, I can't do some things. I've done some things. There's people who are trying to make it a thing to have anesthesia available for women who get IDs.

You know she did spray something on them. Really? Yeah, she's like, this is some numbing spray or something like that. But that was today, that wasn't back when you got the first. I don't think they used anything to numb me the first time. The first time you lost your period completely, right? Yeah, which actually is not, it's not uncommon,

but it's not the most common thing to happen. Most people still get a light period with the Kylina, but maybe mine was just light enough beforehand that it just completely knocked it out, but I didn't have a period the entire time I had the Kylina, which was my first IUD. And so this one, I don't know, they said there's like probably no chance I'll get a period. I remember we, you know, we're newly married, living in low-income housing, and we got that bill for the IUD, and it was, I think it was $800. This one was more.

Oh, well, we, I think you paid out a pocket for this one. That past one was with insurance, it was $800. Yeah, burst control. I actually think it should be free. Oh, that's what I was kind of thinking. I think it should be, especially since there's such a debate on pro-live versus pro-choice, I think burst control should be free.

Because it would just like make the situation, I think it would ease the situation if it's like everyone has free access to birth control. So I think it would help both sides maybe come together. Do you wanna know if you self pay for an IUD what it costs at this clinic that I went to, which I'm not gonna say, but.

$1,500. More, yeah. Wait, more than $1,500? Yeah, I thought you- Cause you have to get a urine test, which they charge you for. Shoot. we have more than $1,500. Yeah, I thought you have to get a year in test Which they charge you for shoot probably to make sure you're not pregnant Okay, they are not gonna give you one of your pregnant then they charge you for the device itself which is a little over 1300

And then they charge you for the actual procedure of inserting it which is another like 300 Thank you to Lumi for sponsoring this portion of today's episode. Because Abby smells. I smell. Yes. Are you kidding me? Yes, you do.

You could have worked a lot more and man, when you get home from the gym, like you need to take a shower. You never told me that. I'm just messing with you by the way. You know that, right? No, I can't tell. You mess with me about me smelling all the time.

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So you can use them all your hot spots, but you could also, I honestly, should probably use some on my feet. Use it on your back. My back is stinky. Can you do it there? You could literally put it in your hair. I feel like that. Can you do it there? You could literally put it in here. I feel like that's where I smell as my back.

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Pretty much. Don't say that actually. It's not a guarantee with it. But it is clinically proven to control odor better than a shower with soap alone. Wow, that's pretty cool. That's awesome. Yeah, I have the coconut scent,

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That's awesome. Now back to the episode. Look, I love America. I love our country, but it does suck that healthcare is so expensive here. I'm gonna say we've got some pretty good healthcare. It's just, it's ridiculous like it can be so expensive. Yeah, I don't, I have no idea what I'm gonna pay. And the pricing is honestly BS though, because what happens is they will say one price, and then the insurance company will say, aha, no, no, no, no, they'll negotiate it down. So it's not just like a fair, like, oh, here's the price. Isn't it also weird that they have a different price for insurance? If you have insurance, and then if you're paying out a pocket, in general, that's just

weird, because you'd be like, this is what the service costs. And this is what the medications or the devices we use cost. Also, isn't it so weird? I was literally thinking about this day because I was paying our kids medical bills, but isn't it so weird that like, you don't know what you're agreeing to before you go in, but you have to get it done.

You can't pay it right away, and then they inflate it and make it so confusing. That's what bugs me, actually. I wish you could just go in and pay right there. And then on their service, you get done. That's the case. I don't understand. It's too...

There's some instances where you can, but very rarely. I feel like they over-complicated on purpose. They made me pay. I think they over-complicated on purpose to screw people over and said they make more money because there's a lot of money in healthcare. There's so much money in it. Yeah. Sorry, and I was kind of...

They should be paid well. That was kind of a tangent. Yes, and we need... And that's an unfortunate thing is I don't think a lot of it's going to the providers. It's more so going to these larger pharmaceuticals. And look like we need to pay doctors well because we want really smart people to be doing our medical procedures and taking care of us. We want extremely intelligent people to be doing all that so that we get the best care possible. But sometimes that can make it hard for people who are lower income to afford this stuff.

I mean, it was a steep cost. Okay, question for you. Are we gonna give our daughters in IUD? We don't have daughters. I guess if we did one day. I don't know. I know, that was the direction we were going. I don't even know either.

I'm talking about... I kinda just started spitting off. Yeah, that's a whole different... Yeah, that is something I would really need to think about when we have kids in high school. It's really complicated. Like, all these topics are so complicated and there's so many different perspectives

and sides to take into account. But... Yeah, I never got the talk and you did so. I got the talk when I was nine because I started asking questions when I was... I know it's really good to your parents. I know it's true. It's good to hear questions, yeah. I got to talk when I was nine because I started asking questions when I was nine. I know it was really good to go to your parents. I think it was too. It was two.

I'm really glad they did. So we'll see. We will definitely be giving our kids a talk. I don't know. I just know that it's not right now because he doesn't even know his ABCs. Yeah. I'm gonna think about those things when we get there

and right now I'm just thinking about our current family planning situation. Yeah, I think we honestly could even have an age appropriate talk with them before they're even nine. Like I don't think- Oh for sure. I don't think that it has to be this big thing. Maybe if it's something that you talk about, you know, over the years with them, it's never this like freaky shocking thing that happens.

They're going to be asking questions as soon as they can talk. That are going to relate to reproduction in some way. Even if they see a woman that's pregnant, so it's just like there's always an age-appropriate way to kind of talk about those things, I feel like. So we got married four and a half years ago and you stopped getting your period because you had an IUD.

And then you got the IUD taken out back in the summer of 2021 and I think we started using I think we had condoms that we used for a little bit. It was the two-year mark we had talked about, hey, after two years, you know, we'll start trying. I got it out. Giving it out was so easy. Really?

Yeah, it was. It was nothing like getting it inserted. No, it wasn't like getting it inserted. I mean, it wasn't terrible to get it inserted inserted either but they just pulled, there's like strings on it that they just clamp on to and then yank it out. Yeah. It didn't really hurt. Does it, what does it feel like? Like do you feel, what do you feel when it, they take it out? A pinch. A pinch. Inside. Like in the weirdest place you've ever been pinched before in your life. It's crazy how you went from fully not being able to get pregnant at the time to boom.

Now you're, now you can. That's something that's effective immediately, so that's good. Yeah, what's creepy though, what kept freaking me out when we had the IUD though was we would have friends that I think we knew someone that had an ectopic pregnancy and we knew people that ended up getting pregnant with IUD

too. It's crazy how many stories I've heard like that when they're 99.9% of the effect. Like, effective. Yeah, I honestly question that sometimes. I guess I'm like, I don't know that much of the 0.1%. Yeah.

I don't know that. And they can't just be like, it's 99.9% with perfect use. It's like, you don't use it like you just get it inserted or not. Yeah. So I do question that sometimes, but we understand that there's a 0.1% chance that we could still get pregnant. Did you get your period back?

When they took it out, you never just got it back. Yeah, I did. Then you get it. No, you did, because you got your period and you were so sad because. I thought I was pregnant. I think we had, like we weren't like trying, but I think we had maybe like done it a few times.

And then you were so, you were devastated that you got your period. I know, I thought I was. You were really excited. And so, yeah, I got one period in between and then we got pregnant with our first. I never got my period back. Got pregnant with our second.

Yeah. And now I have an idea, so I will not be getting my period for, who knows how long. Obviously, we're in the situation that we're in now. We have two beautiful boys and we cannot be happier. But if you could go back, would you have changed that? Like, would you have gotten an IED back then?

The first time? Yeah. Like after the first pregnancy? Oh, no. I can't imagine any other way now. Yeah, that's how I feel too. But that's how I feel, but then also, I think at that time, I was like, I really don't want to do hormonal.

And so obviously it didn't work the best for us. Now, we're not saying we were perfect with everything. So clearly we weren't. But yeah, I think I just needed to know for myself that non-hormonal doesn't work the best for me personally. So like non-hormonal options or natural family planning, all that stuff can work amazing for some people. And for other people like me, very forgetful, not really.

Yeah. Am I forgetful? Yeah, I'm never really a routine person. So it just didn't work the best for me. And it's better to just have it one and done. Yeah. I think like, if you're going to do natural family planning or if you're going to do, there's some different, like there's one where you have a thermometer and there's an

app and you can, you know, put your temperature into the app. Yeah, I think that works great. And then there's, we almost did the daisy at one point, wasn't that, that type of, it's the same thing. Natural family planning, essentially. I think all those are great, but like, personally, me, I think that if you same thing. It's the same thing. Natural family planning essentially. I think all those are great, but personally me, I think that if you're gonna go down that route, you wanna be married and open to the possibility of kids,

cause I don't know, they're just not as effective as something like an IUD. So if you're dating or you're in a relationship. It takes a lot more work. Yeah. Like this I literally just went and got and I can walk away and not even think about it for eight years. But with that, it takes a lot more work. Yeah. Like this, I literally just went and got and I can walk away and not even think about it for eight years.

But with that, it takes a lot more work. Like you have to think a lot and you could mess up sometimes. But first time, it all works great. So yesterday, you seemed pretty scared when it came to. I honestly just wanted attention. You wanted attention for me? That's what that was. Can't you just come out and say that?

Like why do you feel like you need to hide that? I wish you would have just said, Matt, I need you to get me attention. I feel like you took me more seriously because I was pretending to be scared. You pretended to be scared just to get me to focus on you more. I was dreading it. I'm like, this isn't gonna be like a fun thing to do tomorrow.

Like, Gippy, sign me up, but I also just wanted to attention. Like, I love more than anything, just like attention and like to be comforted and to feel like safe and cozy. You're so schemy, like you totally did all that just because you're like, I want him to really focus on,

which I wanted, obviously I wanted to do that. I wanted to spoil, come on now. I just want you to just be like, come here. Okay. I did spoil you. We got the special treat afterwards. Spoiled you. We got, I spoiled you. I wanted to take you out to brunch.

You wouldn't let me take you out to brunch. I wanted to bash the babies because I had a feet all year. Okay, the brunch is like our treat. After we go to the hospital or, you know, to a- It wasn't the hospital. A female doctor every time we always get brunch. That's like our thing. We started that with our first pregnancy

We continued it with the second pregnancy. I saw it eatin' Abby. I haven't eaten anything today. That's so bad You did eat pretzels. I had a few pretzels at Swig after we got SOTUS. I'm really hungry too. Okay, so you weren't even scared That's like literally news to me. I totally believe you're really good actors by the way. I thought I told you I said I just wanted Tension I did tell you that you should go and acting you should really consider it. I told you I just wanted to tension I didn't say I said I just want you to comfort me. Okay, so I just want comfort I feel like we could both step up our game with focusing on each other's Leveling which is because you definitely like acts of service like that makes you feel so loved and appreciated And I can do more of that and then mine is words of affirmation

Mm-hmm and what's so funny Abby is we give each other the one that we like. Like I feel like I'm, I would confidently say I'm good at giving you words of affirmation because that's what I like. So I say nice things to you all the time. And then you want access service. So you like, you're making me dinner.

You're like picking up and doing things like that because you want me to also reciprocate that and so I think we both Need to just be aware of oh maybe I should do the love language that my spouse really appreciates You made me coffee today. I didn't make you a coffee today But we didn't have eggs. I wasn't gonna make you breakfast this morning But we were out of eggs. I feel like I say nice things you really don't I and I could do better on the acts of service That's what I'm saying that makes me feel so bad. I hyped up your song. Did you actually like my song?

Yes. You really did. I kept telling you. I came back in your office specifically to be like, I don't know if I told you enough how much I love it. Which one, okay, from I like right now, here to stay and falling in love, which one's your favorite? Rank them. They all get stuck in my head. Which one's the best song though? Just be honest.

I mean, I like, I like right now the most because it's stuck in my head. Which one's the best song though, just be honest. I mean, I like right now the most because it's stuck in my head recently. And it feels so happy. Like it feels like a casual listening song. Yeah. So probably that one, because I just listened to it on repeat. What I love about that one is we wrote it so fast.

And it just kind of came together. We had the idea and then just like, when you have a really good idea, sometimes it just, the process moves so quickly because the core of the song is there and so you're not trying to figure out what it is like you know the destination that you're headed to and so you just quickly come up with the lyrics. What if I write you a poem and then you turn it into a song? That would be dope.

That'd be really cool. We could write a song together. Okay, I can't sing though so. It's freaking cool that, like, there's music that I wrote that people listen to now. Can pull up on Spotify. I know, you can literally say. But tell me why our Google doesn't know how to play it.

It does, you can say, hey Google, play, I like right now by Matt Howard. I've tried it, it doesn't work. You're kidding. I wonder if I have Siri do it. Hey Siri, play, I like right now by Matt Howard. It doesn't do that on Google. It I like right now by Matt Howard. It doesn't do it. It works. It works with Siri. That's dope. I swear it works with Google. I think you're probably just

doing it wrong. Google doesn't listen to you when you talk to our Google it never works. It has child luck. I think it it knows my voice and I think it doesn't recognize. Because I'm a child and they're like we're not going to listen to that kid. Don't people sometimes think that you're a child when you call like when you're on the phone with somebody like. Yeah. I like I'm talking to your dad Is there an adult in the house that we can say to? Actually someone I came to the door they were like selling stuff and they're like is there someone I can like Me? I own this house

That's funny That's weird Okay, we got distracted getting your idea so yeah I was like nervous because I was like oh man I don't want anything else You told me not to come with you though. That that threw me off. That was some weird stuff that you were doing because you were like, don't come, I'm okay, but I feel like you really wanted me to come so I did come. Be honest. You wanted me to come with you. You weren't in the room. You were just in the car. But like I went with I dropped you off and I was there to be emotional support. I could have done it either way. Really?

Yeah, I didn't really. I didn't really think of a deal. Okay. Well, you made it feel like a big deal. I just wanted to tension. Okay. What can I do today? Because over the last time I got my ID, you had like special treats for me, like prepared. Wait, what did I give you last time? I gave you a watch. That's right. I did do that. And then we watched Harry Potter and then we watched it. And you're like, you don't have to do anything else all day just like here and eat your chocolate bar. And that's why you didn't want to go on the horseback ride

because you just wanted to just watch Harry Potter and eat a watchman call it. It's something along those lines. This horseback riding sound like a good idea or a bad idea. It'll be fine. I am cramping though, but. Really? Yeah, but it's fine. That's the thing like, is that an internal thing, or is it actually gonna affect you

that you're like leg spread on a horse? No, no, no, that won't affect. It's so high up there. Okay, that's what I was thinking. Because I did some research on Google and I saw people in the forum talking about how they went horseback riding the same day they got their out UD.

Yeah, I mean, it's not like I'm gonna feel it. But obviously, like, I want this to be fun for you. So if you don't wanna go ride horses, like you don't have to go ride horses. I wanna ride a horse, this is gonna be cute. I thought you had a cute too. It's at sunset too, in the mountains. It's gonna be beautiful.

It'll be fun. I'm excited. Okay. So yeah, you dropped me off because I told you not to come in. It would have been a little weird honestly. I feel like it's sweet when you come to pregnancy appointments, but this type of appointment, it was just going to be like not the vibe. It was girls only.

Yeah. And let me just kind of walk you through the appointment. Yeah, walk me through what happened. You didn't really tell me. First of all, I had to pay like $800 for half of it. That's so ridiculous. But you should be. I'm sure and to get shortened out because I feel like it should definitely cover that. But we're on a health Share so what happened with the health share why why did it not cover the appointment? They just didn't They couldn't figure out if it was covered or not and then they wouldn't see me like for the appointment unless they knew and

Unless I it was paid for I guess probably because you're choosing it's not like a prenatal appointment or something like that Yeah, right so I paid and then I go in, they do your vitals, all that stuff. And then they just come back in, they're like take a pants off. And... Why'd you say like that, take a pants off? No, they actually said, undress from the waist down and then you put the drape

over your lap. Do you hide your underwear in your shorts? Of course, I'm not gonna lie, my undress out like that. That's so messed up. I think that's so funny that that's actually a thing. Are you gonna leave your panties out? You're butt naked from the waist down,

yet you have to hide your underwear? Oh, just, they don't need to see that. They're on a need to see basis. I don't love that they're going down there anyway, but. Was it a lady doctor? One lady, she comes in. Literally one lady.

No nurse, hold your hand. No nurse, hold my hand. What? She was super nice. She's one lady, she comes in. Literally one lady. No nurse, hold your hand. No nurse, hold my hand. What? She was super nice. She asked if I had any questions and she didn't really give me a whole lot of information because I've already had an IUD. So if it was my first, I'm sure she would really go into

detail about like describing things because there are risks that come with it and there's side effects to know about, which I'm not gonna repeat here because I don't remember everything. So then she like tells me how long it's effective for, kind of like gets out and then it literally comes in like a pack, like they have like a little...

You see it, you literally saw the IUD. Well, it comes in like a sterile thing so they can actually... It literally says Marina and they pull it out and there's a bunch of tools in there for them to use because they're one time use things because they're going inside you. But then they first use the little speculum thing,

they clean you out, and then... What do you mean they clean you out? It's not iodine, but it's like iodine. Whoa. Sterilize. Okay. Cause piercing through. That is just so crazy.

Yeah, it is really crazy. Then they measure which that doesn't feel comfortable, but then this time, actually no stop. This time time they use some type of anesthesia or numbing spray. And that actually burned which I wasn't expecting. So they sprays this numbing spray in there and literally let's it sit for like less in a minute. Could you like you could feel like spraying? Like it burned like it burned inside. Did you just take out a spray bottle with some stuff in there?

I can't see what's happening. Yeah, and so she sprays. I said, that's kind of odd because I didn't get any numbing the first time. She's like, yeah, not everyone uses it. She's not even in that same practice. So maybe if it's something you're nervous about and you really want to have some type of pain relief or pain preventative, then maybe ask your provider if they do offer some type of numbing.

Maybe that's something that you can do beforehand. Yeah. And so she did, I didn't even think that she was going to do that. I mean, it's not like I could still feel stuff, but I have to believe that it made it easier. I don't know. And then I measure and I clamp down on her or make some. Here's the thing. You don't really need to know everything that's going on down there

because they'll do what they need to do to get it in and it'll just be done in an instant. And they kept saying small cramp and then they would do something and then it really was just like a small cramp and then it was done. Wow. I had to stay there for a minute

because it was bleeding. Are you bleeding right now? Do you have, are you wearing, do you have to wear like a pad? Or like what exactly, I mean I probably should wear a pad. Cause you can't, oh you're not wearing anything? I have 12 paper. It's a peri-like.

Happy. It's so light I hate pads. Did they say, hold up, did they say you can't like have a tampon in or anything where they like no tampons for a certain amount of time? Nope, they didn't say that. Really, okay. But like why would I need a tampon?

Oh, no, because of the bleeding. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, What about poked? Do you feel a poke? Yeah, when they extend the little the little arms on the things It's like a little. Oh, yeah, here comes the arms. It's like an umbrella You did it you feel like an umbrella. I wouldn't even know that I would think that if I didn't know that that's actually what was happening But I do feel like a little like it. Wow. What's that? Yeah, it's crazy how that goes through your cervix Yeah, like it's literally so high up, it's like, it's past all the lady parts. The little strings. Yeah, and you have little strings.

No, it's not past the lady parts, it's in the lady parts. Well, it's in your uterus, like, Yeah. It's not even in your vagina, it's literally past that. Whoof. What? What? It's crazy.

I mean, it is crazy. And I just say you are really tough. Really? Because I feel like a lot of women get. And I just say you are really tough. Really? Because I feel like a lot of women get scared about IUD insertion and rightfully so. I wasn't excited for it. Rightfully so. It's not an easy thing to do.

Well, I don't want to. Sorry. I think that you handle it like a champ. Like I don't, I think you're a tough cookie. Thank you. And I think I need to remember that whenever you're like in pain, because it's like this lady's not, she's not, and she's not a wussy, okay? Like you're really tough. Like if you're, if you're crying because you're in pain, like you weren't a lot of pain. When have I ever cried for pain in front of you?

That's a really good question. Maybe just cry because of emotional things. Yeah, I don't think I ever cried because of pain for it in front of you. Yeah. I just don't find myself crying because I'm in pain ever. Yeah. Even in the worst contraction, I literally think about that. There was never in my mind to think about crying. It was literally just like, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, sh, sh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, sh bad IUD experience or it was scary or it was really painful. I do not want to minimize that at all because I attribute a lot of this to my practitioners like being very competent and good at their job.

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weighted product steal. Now back to the episode It's your 24 right now. You could have this till you're 32 So wait was that like we were you just like messing around right there? No, I'm being real I can't believe in it. You're gonna be ready to right crazy. Are we gonna are we gonna wait this out? What do you mean like leave it in three years? Are we yeah? Are we gonna like reconvene on like the kids thing in eight years? Sooner than that. Sooner than that. If I'm gonna have another kid, it's not gonna be as long as eight years from now.

What's crazy is we could actually have children like when you're 40. Like we could wait 16 years, Griffin could be 17, about to finish high school. Yeah. He could be 16 driving, and we're like, yeah, let's have another baby. We could do that. Like we 100% could do that. Which is a little crazy to me. We're not right now. I can't see a world where I would want to do that My mom had all for kids in her 30s my grandma had my uncle at 42 my aunt had a baby at 40

I believe like you legit could have a baby at 40 years old But personally I don't want to do that. Yeah, no, I just think it'd be fun to be young empty nesters. Yeah. Cause then we can live it up together. Yeah, I do see. I think realistically, we'll probably get this out before eight years. I think it'd be fun to be young grandparents too,

cause we can like really play with our grandkids. Yep. And then if our kids, if our kids decide and that's half grandkids, then we'll just adopt a kid. Wouldn't that be fun? Like it's like, oh well the fates decided we're not getting grandkids so we're gonna be disappointed if neither one of our kids had kids. I think it would be sad yeah I want to have grandkids.

Yeah. So then we just have to- Every hard though because you can't say anything to them. Well we could- Because if they don't want to have kids, the last thing you want to do is to make someone who doesn't want to have kids have kids because then they probably wouldn't be the best parents. Or maybe we could be foster parents maybe if we wanted to have kids in our life again. I don't know. There's a lot of options. Volunteer.

Definitely should volunteer. Yeah. When should I get... Because I was thinking about this. I was actually... We didn't really talk about it because I think it was pretty clear that of a sector, it wouldn't be the move right now since I am 25 and that's like a permanent thing. Yeah. But I did look it up and the sector, these are reversible, but it's not like 100%.

How much does a sector, me cost? At least in Europe, because it was in Euros or something, it said like $4,500 to reverse a sector, me, so I'm guessing. No, but just a sector, me in the US cost. I'm gonna guess five grand. Oh, so it is. It's a surgery, it's like a small surgery that you get.

But you're awake for it. Um, yeah. It's not a surgery. I think it's a procedure. I think they numb you. They like they numb the area. Because they're like, they're like, they're like,

they're like, cutting you open, you know, like they're like, literally going, it's, yeah. It's not like a super crazy surgery, but it is a small surgery. When should I get a vasectomy? When do you think it would be a good time? When we're sure we're not gonna have any more kids.

Do you think 32 will know? Probably by 32 will know. Yeah, cause I feel like I could see us having a mole. I think at least in my head I was like, we're gonna have all of our kids in our 20s. Yeah, that was in my head too. And that was what I thought before we gave birth to Griffin and then now, Auguste here and so now,

it's just like, we'll have to figure out all of that. Isn't that kinda good though? We kinda just like knocked it out. We did knock it out and so now it's just like we'll have to figure out all that. Isn't that kind of good though? We kind of just like knocked it out. We did knock it out and I think it's harder now but dude when they're older it's gonna be so sweet. No it's already so sweet. The only bad thing is they could be arch enemies but you just can't control that with your kids. No the best friends. Griffin's so sweet to Oggy.

No but then you should have seen it. Oggy smiled like he has never smiled. Really? He's such a smiley guy. But when Griffin came over and was like waving in his face, Augie had the biggest smile from ear to ear for a long time. He loves his brother too. They both love each other.

I love that. I know. I was talking to someone the other day about like, how their oldest responded when they brought the baby home. They're like, ugh, then really? Love it. And I'm like, Griffin loves him. He loves being a big brother. But he's so little, it's sweet.

He has a big emotional capacity for such a little guy. Griffin's just at such a fun age right now. And so I love it. I really am enjoying this age. And I think I need to remind myself with Ogi, because I think about Ogi, I'm like, oh man, I just can't wait for Ogi to be older. But it's like, when Ogi's older,

I won't ever have a one year old Griffin anymore. And so it's part of why I wrote that song I like right now, because it makes you remember that the here and now is gonna pass in an instant. And so once it's done, it's done. And I think if you just spend your life wanting to go to the future or wanting to go to the past, then you're never gonna fully be present in the here now.

And that's a problem. And I'm the biggest culprit of that. I'm so bad at that. I can just get excited. I'm like, oh, I can't wait till we like own a home. And then we own a home. Oh, not really a home. I can't wait till we have kids.

Oh, now we have kids. I can't wait till and you just keep saying the same crap over and over again. I feel like you're gonna keep yourself in check though. You're always like, I enjoy this. Like. Yeah, I've been reminded myself of that. Like when I take Griffin on walks,

we go on a bike ride, like, it's really fun. I really enjoy it. And I just remember, hey, I can fully be present in this moment and Enjoy this and not want to be anywhere else then right here because this is the best and these like are the glory days too Like we're gonna look back on these days one day and say I wish I could go back. I wish I could relive Being young and being parents to two young beautiful little boys So I I just want a fully chair shit, you know beautiful little boys. So I just want to fully cherish it, you know?

Mm-hmm. Same. Yeah. So that's why I have a hard time like being like, okay, this is what I'm gonna do. Eight years from now, like this is what I'm gonna do in the meantime, like, I don't know, I'm gonna have a hard time making all those plans

because it's like, I'm just enjoying where we're at with our family and four and our two little boys. Yeah. And the doctor was explaining, she's like, well, you don't have a girl yet, so. You try. So she was kind of like encouraging you to get the IUD out. No, not encouraging me, but she was like, definitely thinking that we would try for another,

especially because I'm 24. I don't know what it is, but I just had two brothers growing up. And so the fact that we have two boys just kind of made sense to me, like I've almost expected this. I just kind of thought, yeah, I had brothers, so I'll have boys and I don't feel like I'm missing out that we don't have a girl. I don't either. I thought I would.

And I know dads that are in the same boat and on the opposite where they wanted little girls and now they have girls and they're like, I'm so content with where I'm at. Yeah, I don't feel like I like people are like, you're going to keep trying until you get a girl, I'm like, no, I feel really content with where we're at and I don't think a girl would complete our family. I feel like our family's complete, but it doesn't mean that we don't have room for more.

Yeah. So yeah, all I have to say, I feel really satisfied with having, if we just have all boys, or if we just have two boys, like I have to say, I feel really satisfied with having, if we just have all boys, or if we just have two boys, like I would feel very satisfied. I love, love, love kids. And this is my ultimate life stream was to be a mom to have kids.

Like the top, this is my mountain top moment. And so for me, it's sad to think that it went by so fast because we had them back to back so fast because moments are lost when you have two so close together. I'm missing moments with the Griffin when I'm nursing Augier. I had to set, set Augie down to like play with Griffin more. I feel like that part is kind of heartbreaking to me if that was like, if this was it, you know. Wouldn't that be the case though if we have more kids because then the more you add the less time you get with each kid individually. So it's almost like I would be really sad if that season of life went by so quick. Oh yeah. Like it has. What's crazy though is like,

do you ever see how freaking cute like eight year old kids are? Like Griffin won't be eight until seven years from now and I'll be 32. You'll be 31. Like, we got time. We have time to really enjoy these years with them and do some fun trips. Like, I would love nothing more than to convert a Sprintervan and go like road trip around the country with our boys and like work on the road and just go on a hike says a family and be out in nature. I think there's something so special about being in nature with the people that you love.

It's so much fun. Like some of my favorite memories together is me and you out on a hike together, just exploring the world and some of my best memories with friends are like snowboarding the mountains and being surrounded by that beauty or going on a camping trip with a bunch of guys and being in the mountains of Hawaii, like surrounded

by beautiful trees and you can look down and see the ocean. There's just nothing better than being out in nature with the people that you love. Yeah, that's hard to do with babies for sure. So I think that's, I'm excited for that. Would you be willing to go do van life with me with her boys? No. Okay. Would you be willing to do it for a week?

I would, yes. Okay, there we go. I would consider if anything off the wall was important to you, I would consider it. I appreciate that. The things that are important to you, obviously, like, what's a wacky, hey, your turn, you take the baton. Like, what's a wacky hey your turn you take the baton like What's a wacky thing you can think of that you think would be fun to do as a family like would you want to go to Japan or something or maybe Maybe something that's not crazy. Maybe it's just like I'm not like crazy right now I'm kind of in my like at home. Yeah

Growing our family and our home and our community Maybe it's maybe it's just I want to do Sunday picnics at the park with our boys or something. Sure. That sounds great. That sounds good to me too. So, you're getting a vasectomy? Yep. Yeah, as far as like what to expect or what maybe you can't expect post, IUD later that

day is I feel like pretty much totally normal. Maybe a little crampy. Maybe a little bloated, but. I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I don't think it's like hard and fast, like three days. Oh, something she did say is that the strings are really stiff right now and maybe poke. You know what I just thought about? What? It's gonna scare me the first time doing it because like the last time.

What are you thinking about? The last time that happened when you weren't pregnant, we got pregnant, you know what I'm saying? Oh yeah, the more I'm sterile. Bro, like that would be the craziest my first in no card. If like we get an IUD and then you get pregnant again. No here, yeah that would be the best. I would like, and of course we'd love that baby so much.

I would be like, it's great. I would be throwing up in my mouth. I'd be like, I don't know what to do. Like I would just like, dude. If at that point I'd be like, these were the cards we were dealt with. Dude, if that happened, I would like legit get it to sex me for that day. I'd be like, this is not like, we're done. You know what I'm saying?

Feeling generous right now, it would mean a lot if you could just get out of this app just for a moment. Go to your Spotify app, I know you have it, and then type in your little search bar, Matt Howard. Find that person and save his new song I Like Right Now. Thank you. He's a banger, it is stuck in my head in the best way, and it'll just make you so happy.

It's one of those songs you can play on repeat in your car, play in your kitchen while you're making pasta. Even show it to your kids, our sons, especially, you know, I'm just kidding. Griffin really loves to bounce out to it. It's really sweet. He starts clapping as soon as it's playing. Someone said in the comment section of our TikTok

that it would be a good first dance song, Slow Down. So now I'm like, maybe I should do a slow down version of it. You know? Yeah, because a lot of people, like on their wedding day, they're thinking of like all their future plans. Yes. And I think that'd be a really good way for people to just enjoy the moment.

Yeah, also, if you're listening to our podcast on Spotify, you don't even have to leave to go listen to it. You can literally listen to it right here on Spotify. That's a good point. And if you're watching the podcast on YouTube, guess what? You can listen to the song right here on YouTube. If you search it, it'll pop up.

It's on YouTube too. Yeah, it's also on Apple Music. It's literally everywhere. If your grandma still listens to Pandora, you can listen to it on Pandora. That's the cool thing about the way it's distributed Distributed I just do like you had another it. Yeah, I did add another in but thank you. Thank you, honey Abby's my biggest cheerleader. So I really got to show up trying to be a art at music or a swipe

You're hilarious and now back the episode Wouldn't it be crazy if I just told you I went into the doctor's office? Wait, is that the real- That would be so dirty. That would be so dirty. Was that the real reason you drove me to the IUD appointment to make sure I went? No, are you serious? Are you serious?

Are you serious? No. And trust me? I did that to support you. Also, by the way, you could have just walked into the office pretended that you went to an appointment for all I know. I know, what if I did that? I'm fully trusting that you have an IUD right now.

Okay, I honestly have no idea. You'll know because the strings are really pokey when you first get it. I remember that actually. They kind of threw me off a little bit. Because they can fall out. Because if the strings come out, come down too far, then maybe that means that IUD is falling out.

Because I used to have to check for the strings. You remember that? Don't say that. Okay. They did say that I should come back in six weeks to check the strings. Okay. But she was like, if you've had them before, then you kind of know what to expect. So I didn't schedule that. Dude, that's scary. You know for a fact that

someone's had that happened before. Okay, but here's the thing. With seven billion people in the world. There's someone that had an unplanned pregnancy, got an IUD after the unplanned pregnancy, and they got pregnant with a freaking IUD. I guarantee you it's happened. Probably. How, what would you do? I think I'd be really overwhelmed at this point because I'd be like, I've been pregnant for so long and it is not good to have, like if you can help it, like consecutive C-sections,

it's not good. That would be really bad on your body, right? I mean, it's not recommended for sure. They say at least a year. But you got pregnant too quickly already with a second. Well, it wasn't as serious because I did have a vaginal deliver the first time. But like if they're cutting indie or uterus, they want you to be a little bit more spaced apart. So yeah, I don't really feel anything.

I feel like cramping. I'm actually going to go write a horse today. I will let you know if that poses some issues. But that's that suckers in there. When are we going to start ripsicking together? Because I bought you a ripstick um I don't know you also haven't read your one wheel a while. I hate the one wheel Why do you hate the one wheel you guys not always tells me he's like I got a spare all this money on a one-wheel for you I thought he's so cute. I thought it'd be so cute to one really good. I never wanted to one wheel

I never wanted one of those I'm pretty sure you said you wanted it. And I ate it so bad on one of those men. And when we were writing, I felt literally to my chin. A guy came out of his house to check on me because of how bad the fall was. Well, I think that dude broke his wrist on a one-wheel. He said he broke both of his wrists on a one-wheel. We're never, he said, I both never saw one of those things. I was like, I can believe it.

They're glitchy and they're scary. You've eaten it. My brother Caleb ate it. Our friend Dallin ate it. Josh ate it. My brother Josh ate it. I'm the only one who hasn't eaten it on a one meal yet. You're the only one.

I'm the only one that ever, like I always wear my helmet when I ride it. And then for a while I wore wrist cards and meat pads. You're being the helmet guy. Just in case, you know, I wore wrist cards and me bad. You're being helmet guy. Just in case, you know, I like to have fun, but I like to send it safely. I like to be safe when I'm doing crazy activities. Sending safely. Get merch that says that.

Sending it safely. Sending safely send it would be the. Oh, yeah. I don't like that as much. You don't like it. Sending it safely. Yeah. We gotta do podcast merch. I think that'd be fun.

Sending it safely. Like if we did some. We gotta do podcast merch. I think that'd be fun. Send it safely. Like if we did some sort of unplanned podcast merch, if we did something about you crying because you crying every podcast episode. I'm not crying today. Oh, are you worried about that? What? The fact that I have hormones now?

I actually am a little worried about that. I'm worried about that too. I feel like I finally had clarity of mine for the first time in months. Well, I think there's postpartum hormones, but I think, yeah, I can throw off things though. When has been the last time I cried actually? I haven't, you haven't cried that much recently.

I feel like I was doing really good emotionally and now I have birth control and now I'm probably gonna go off the rails again. You really think so? I hope not. I don't think it's that much more. It's like not like pregnancy. Yeah, pregnancy is totally different. I actually don't remember feeling any differences like the first time I had a IUD so I don't think I'm gonna get... Like I didn't struggle with my skin or with weight or libido.

Now that you're not. The first time, so I don't expect it this time. My question though is now that you're not pregnant, are you gonna go snowboarding with me this year? Yeah, I'm gonna take the greens. Are you excited? I'm so scared. Why have you, you've like built it up to this scary thing in your life?

It's really not that scary. Yeah, I've gone because I've been pregnant twice, and so now I'm gonna go snowboarding, and I'm like, I'm gonna break all my bones. But that's why I bought the lipstick, because lipsticking is like snowboarding on land. So it's gonna help you learn. Is it like the one wheel?

It's completely different than the one wheel. Okay. Completely different. I like the idea of a lipstick because it's not electronic so it can't glitch out on me. Well, they fixed that though. They did, they sent over a new part and installed it. I'm trust it.

I'll never trust it again. Because one time it did the ghost mode thing where it like just it just shot off by itself. Yeah, imagine if I was on trust it again. Because one time it did the ghost mode thing where it just just shot off by itself. Yeah, imagine if I was on there. Yeah. So I am definitely, sometimes I ask myself, do I like snowboarding or do I like it just because I want to do something with you that's an activity

and I want to make you happy? That's the thing though, honey. You actually did like skateboarding. When I taught you how to skateboard. I did. So that's where I like, I think. So I think I do like it. If you like skateboarding, you actually did like skateboarding. When I taught you how to skateboard. I did. So that's where I like, I think. So I think I do like it. If you like skateboarding, you're gonna like snowboarding and you're gonna like surfing,

but there is a learning curve. It's not gonna be as easy as it's nothing like skateboarding. Can I actually talk about this? Because I was talking about this exact same thing with you recently. Remember when I was in the car and I was like, this is, I'm not saying it's positive or negative. This is just something that happens when you get married really young.

But I do feel like I kind of have an identity crisis sometimes. Me too. Where I'm like, who in the world would I be? Had I not gotten married so young? Like, what would my preferences be? What would my hobbies be? Because you have shaped me at a time in my life where I was like changing so much

We both were changing so much and we were together So we changed each other and like formed each other as Adults what would I do with my adult life if it wasn't for you? We were going on dates when we were both 17. I know and now I'm 25 like think about that And then I ask myself like, you've changed my food habits. You've changed my, like, like I said, my hobbies. My career has been shaped by you. My, like, where I live, like, the state I live in.

Sometimes I like have crazy moments where I'm like, what in the world would I be if I were? Yeah. And it's not like, I think it's a really good thing that we, I think there's a lot of pros to getting married young. I really think there's just I think it's a really good thing that we, I think there's a lot of pros to getting married young. I really think there's just pros and cons. We're good for each other. Yeah.

I don't know. I would say it worked out for us. Worked out pretty well. I, yeah. Well, you don't seem so sure about it. I was thinking I was gonna say something and I can't remember what it was. Oh, okay.

Maybe just the fact that I picked up like your sense of humor, I think. Mm-hmm. You've like really swayed me in that direction and I don't know. Yeah, you've changed me. that I've picked up like your sense of humor, I think. You've really swayed me in that direction and I don't know. Yeah, you've changed me. I want you to grab my sense of humor. It's really weird. Your sense of humor is different than any other sense of humor that I've ever understood.

And I think you kind of created it with your friend Morgan, because you guys knew each other from such a young age. It goes way back. And it's so stupid, it's so in your face, you just make these weird faces and do all these weird things. You like, sometimes if you're excited, you'll like jump up in the air and pretend that you're like running in mid air, you know what I'm saying?

I thought you liked that. I do, I think it's hilarious, but it's weird. Like it still is really weird, but I think it's cute. That's funny. But yeah, like I never was into traveling before I met you, but then you got me into travel, and you've changed me a lot.

We both changed each other, and I think that's just part of a healthy relationship. You just take on each other's attributes, I guess. It's really beautiful when you think about it. So in 2023, we had a baby. In 2022, wait, 2022, we had a baby. 2023, we had a baby. In 2024, what are we having?

And we had IUD, so not a baby. We did, I did do that Instagram post. That said, we were gonna get a dog. I said, if this gets 100,000 likes, we'll had a baby. In 2024, what do we have in? And we had IUD, so not a baby. We did, I did do that Instagram post. That said, we were gonna get a dog. I said, if this gets 100,000 likes, we'll get a dog. Are we getting a dog? And then people all liked it. This was back in 2021,

but then like the next day, we found out we were pregnant. So we never got the dog. So we couldn't get a dog in 2024. Mm. The only problem though is if we travel a lot, which I do want to start traveling again. Well now that my parents live with us.

But now that your parents live with us, they can watch the dog while we're gone. And your dad loves dogs. So maybe we could like co-parent the dog. Like maybe it's like partially our dog and partially your parents dog. That'd be kind of fun. That'd be good. We could think about that. We could either do that or we could have a coffee shop.

That would also be fun. You mentioned that today. You were like, I would love to go work at a coffee shop and I'm like, Abby, what if you just open up your own coffee shop and then you could also work at it? I would love that. If you guys want to work at my coffee shop, I'm looking for employee. I'm also looking for a manager because I cannot tell people what to do. It's not my thing. So my jam, I like being told what to do. I don't like telling you what to do. And I don't mean that in like a like controlling way, I just, I don't like to be the boss. I'm not a boss woman. I don't mean that in like a like controlling way. I just I don't like to be the boss

I'm not a boss woman. I don't yeah, and also you boss me around think it do I sometimes yeah? No, I do not Yeah, I think you get mad and then it's like then I'm like I'm just afraid that you're gonna be pissed at me so then I'm I'm just playing this game of what does Abby want right now And if I figure that out then it's happy wife happy life You are ridiculous. It's so true. Who do you think is gonna be the straight up parent every Old man that we've ever met when we're traveling I point that one is always like hey by the way This is the best advice I'll ever give you to stay me. Happy wife happy life. They all say that when are you gonna figure that out then and I think young Guys are just too stupid to like realize it and so you keep your wife happy life. They all say that. When are you gonna figure that out then? And I think young guys are just too stupid to like realize it.

And so you keep your wife happy, you're gonna be on your way to bliss. That's just a little... Let's keep working on that. That's just a little something to share with all the dudes listening to this podcast. Let's keep working on implementing that, Matt. I just want to ask you, who do you think is gonna be the stricter parent between two of us? Probably me actually. Yeah.

You're already giving our kid like sugar over and over again. You give him chocolate milk like every day. You're giving him juice. Our pediatrician said to hold off on juice till he's three. And you're giving him your giving him apple juice all the time. And you always give him bites of your ice cream. She's a little lit. I want to spoil my kid but I also want to make decisions that are on par with that are pediatrician to suggest for our children. I want him to know how many good foods are out there. That's true. I will do this. This was such a fun conversation.

If you haven't already listened to any of my songs on Spotify, that would be really much appreciated. Shake myself. So, you should download them right there. I'll sing a little diddy for them. You want to sing it? Go for it. That could change the future. I know I shouldn't.

It's actually the first lyric is if I could change a single thing I wouldn't. Is the first lyric of it? Check it out on Spotify, Matt Howard song. I like it right now. It'll be stuck in your head but in the best way. Yeah. I think this is the best one yet. By the time that they're listening to this episode, I might have my fourth song out already. Also, don't be offended that I didn't know the lyrics. You literally didn't show it to me until it was already out. So you can't be mad at me for not knowing the lyrics.

I've listened to a lot since then. But wherever you listen to it, if you could hit the save or the favorite button that really helps me out, because that just tells the algorithm that people like the song, and then they'll play it for other random people. And then they can also hear the song too. they'll play it for other random people and then

they can also hear the song too. So just make sure you favorite it, save it, hit that heart, whatever. That would mean a lot. Yeah. Or the plus. There's a plus now. I love that spotify. It lets you do plus and minus because then it knows your taste and music. So I always hit the plus button on the music that I like and so do that for my song if you like it. Obviously. Awesome. Yeah, thank you guys We'll see in the next episode and as always three two one peace out dudes