The Unplanned Podcast with Matt & Abby - Hannah Brown & Adam Woolard on Getting Engaged, Tortured, and Followed by Paparazzi

Episode Date: December 6, 2023

This week we were joined by Hannah Brown and her fiancé Adam Woolard. We talked about Hannaha's experiences in reality TV, their relationship being leaked by the paparazzi, and their wild engagement story. This episode is sponsored by RocketMoney, BetterHelp & SeatGeek Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and manage your money the easy way by going to RocketMoney.com/UNPLANNED Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/UNPLANNEDPODCAST and get on your way to being your best self. Use code UNPLANNED for $20 off your first SeatGeek order. seatgeek.onelink.me/RrnK/UNPLANNED BUY OUR MERCH!! unplannedpodcast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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I've just been talking about their message, she said, I shouldn't make any big life decisions right now. I don't really yeah, and you're listening to this on a Monday I'm planning on proposing on a Friday after run three miles chased by dogs There's helicopters and there's whole thing then you get captured and that's when you start having to go through I don't want to say torture but it kind of is we actually didn't even plan There was a whole paparazzi episode about finding out where you lived and then following us. We were holding hands like right before like we got on the street, but they caught us. I guess what is it like being gay someone that was on the bachelor's eye?

Did you watch the season? No, I still haven't seen it. I don't know. It's just like do I want to watch her making out with multiple guys? What's up dude? What's up dude? And we're on back at the on-plan podcast! Today we have some very special guests. Hannah Brown and Adam, thank you guys for coming on the show.

We appreciate you being here. They just got engaged pretty recently. I was looking at your ring. You did an amazing job. That's so nice. He did a really great job. Wow, that is a beautiful ring. Well, did it? Mostly himself.

I didn't know what he was going to do. We went and looked at rings. We were in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, where I'm from. My brother, I just got married. They were picking up some type of wedding registry something from the jeweler. I was like, oh, it was looking at the rings. I was like, well, try it on. I was like, what do you just want to try on?

And they're not like, there wasn't many to choose from. Like maybe like four. Like, and I was like, I just want to see like what, even size I am or whatever. There was one that was a three stone. They didn't look like this exactly, but I never thought I would want that. The way it looked on my finger,

he was like, it looks really nice. And he must have really liked it because that's what he ended up getting me. Wasn't really. That same ring? No, similar. Just a three shot. Tell us about the proposal.

First of all, did you even know what's gonna happen like, were you surprised? I hadn't thought about it really. Just had a lot going on, sorry, in the podcast. We were also working on this other project. There was just a lot happening. And my anxiety was super heightened in a way that hadn't been in a while

was really trying to like just kind of keep that at bay, but was not doing the best. And I like had this freak out conversation. I don't know what's wrong with me. Are you sure you want to be with me? Like this, which mind you, this happens like every... Every quarter. Every quarter.

Yeah. Every quarter. But, you know, this was on this Monday of when he was planning to repose. And I was just like, yeah, I've just been talking about therapists. And she said, I just, I shouldn't make any big life decisions right now. Just, I don't really know. Yeah. And you're listening to this. So she's saying this on a Monday, I'm planning on proposing on a Friday.

Oh my god. One of our favorite places, Bolt Farm, tree houses in Whitwell, Tennessee. Yes. And he had told me we were, I hadn't been putting two and two together because I was so in my own stuff, just thought we were going on a trip. Yeah. Meanwhile, he can't sleep knowing that I've said all this stuff

and he was like, hey, I just like, I really don't talk about something. I was like, oh my gosh, this is about last night. I was like, trust me, I feel so much better. And he's like, well, yeah, like it is You know, you said some things that you know, you're like asking What is love and you know saying that your therapist doesn't think that you need to make any big decisions right now And I feel like it's only fair of me to let you know that I'm planning on for posing on

Friday and I'm like wait I'm planning on her posing on Friday. And I'm like, wait. I said no to you, like my crisis was averted and now it's mellows. Now there's another one. And so then I have a panic attack. And I, so then I messaged my therapist literally like right after we're at dinner

and all cats, I need counsel. Oh my God, I'm sad. And I felt, you know, she was asking how it's feeling. And I was like, it's not that I don't want to get engaged. I just am in this weird space. She's like, well, what if you just say that to him? And I'm like, well, I mean, I kind of did. And he then messaged me.

And it's like, okay, like, I'm going to cancel it all. And I was like, oh, great. This is, I feel bad. But also like, now, now, I know it's going to happen. So I can be like, oh, great. This is, I feel bad, but also like now and now it's going to happen. So I can be like ready, whatever we do something. Yeah. But it's not to do this weekend. How do you guys talked about getting engaged at all?

Or was that like the first time that it was mentioned? They'll be talked about it for sure. We definitely talked about it, halfheartedly and just, you know, just to get a sense of what she would like. Yeah. But that's kind of when we put it into motion, like actually thinking about it. We wanna do this, yeah. Yeah, we didn't talk extensively about it.

And this is after dating for how many years? Over two and a half, two and a half, yeah. Yeah, so then he ended up telling me that everything was not happening. And I was like, we're gonna post poem things. Yeah, I want the surprise factor to be there because that's what engagement's all about. It's like you want the reaction, you want her to feel good about it and

Everything leading up into that point kind of took all the fun away from it. I did have family and friends like flying and driving in from all over the country So there was still a part of me in the back of my head I was like yes, we're gonna put postpone things But I still want to make it work somehow. So that was on Friday we were so sleep that's when everything was just to happen and on Thursday I just going to the weekend I went back to back days. As he was plotting he had he had talked to our friends who owned the bull farm tree houses they had just had a baby like that week the week before and they were going to host like a little party and they had this really beautiful

barn road that will have people come and so I didn't think anything of it so I was like okay great like let's go. I like literally put on like dirty clothes from the floor when I walk in and I'm like oh this is like set up weird for a baby celebration. And he had planned it in this beautiful barn. Wow. It got me there. And this is before your family was in town. This is before, because my family were gonna meet them.

So this was like the Thursday before, and I was so, and I was totally shocked. So we ended up definitely salvaging it, but I also was like, really? Yeah. Wait, but you just had this whole crisis and it, but I also was like, really? Wait, but you just had this whole crisis and then were you kind of worried like, did I just make the wrong decision? It was, I made the thought, I didn't make the wrong decision. The whole thing, like I said, it was never that like I didn't want to get married or get engaged.

It was more, I'm in a weird spot right now. It was still beautiful and gray and I definitely was in the moment and I'm glad a weird spot right now. It was still beautiful and gray, and I definitely was in the moment. I'm glad there wasn't people around, because I could, like, it was just us. Yeah. Looking back, I would have done it differently, for sure. I'm glad everything worked out, and she said yes, and she didn't freak out. But, yeah, there was something in me that I was like, I can still make this work and make her happy and bring this surprise factor back. But in the like looking back really, I should have taken it more seriously, her mental health and like where she was in terms of anxiety and her therapy and what

her therapist said. I think there was a lot of fear around also just getting engaged. It was almost like ripping the bandaid off type thing. For me, I think anxiety and relationships has been always something that I've kind of struggled with, like fear of, sometimes just taking next steps and things after everything that I've gone through, like for those who don't know, like I was the bachelor at Gungage and like I think that was actually, like, kind of just traumatic in a sense. So I think the engagement and like,

everything just kind of triggered something. That it happened was great and that we had it together. And then we had the weekend with our family and friends. And we've obviously had to tell them more of the story. Yeah. And then I also think it's been cool to be able to share our story because a lot of times you just see like pictures and videos and it's like this magical moment which we have. We have the pictures and the videos of a beautiful moment that looks perfect.

But there's this whole backstory that's also everybody hears and there's a lot of women who feel the same way that I do when it comes to and men may be feeling the same way as Adam of their being even though it's something you want to do. There's this fear and it's maybe not always like this picture perfect moment. It's exciting to step into this new part of your life and new chapter, but it's okay to also have other feelings of fear of that. It can be both. It can be both. Yeah, and as you were telling that story, I was thinking that same thing. Yeah.

You can see it all in just a picture, but not know. It can be a lot of heavy things all at once. Yeah. I realized too, as you mentioned, mentioning the Bachelor, I was like, I don't think we ever did a proper intro. So for those of you guys listening, Hannah Brown, if you don't know, Hannah Brown was the Bachelor at. She won Dancing with the Stars, which is super impressive by the way.

And then was just also on special forces. So I can't imagine like having so much of your life public and then doing the Bachelor at, you know, dating all these people, and then you have that engagement on the batch the ret, and now this is going on, so I guess now that I'm putting the pieces of the puzzle together, I'm like, that makes sense why you would have so much stress around this moment.

I'm curious, how much of being on that show was like real versus like television, because I feel like you're aware of it being TV or were you. I don't know. I was such, like, so innocent going on the show, I would say. I really thought that this is like a door that gobs opening up for me and this house can meet my person, like, you know, we met on dating app or me, you know,

all different types of ways. So why not? This is just the way that's gonna happen for me. As far as it being real, I wouldn't say it's staged, but there's a lot, it's a TV show, so there's a lot of production and play producers that are trying to make a good TV show, and you're cut off from the outside world,

so you don't have your family, your friends, to kind of do some pulse checking. And just really asking, like, what do you want? Like, is this who you really want to be with? How are you feeling? Like, you have that, but it's all in a store. It's for store. You can't have that all.

You can't like talk to your siblings. No. What do you think about this person? Like, you have a producer to talk to. You do, but it's on on TV and it's different. Oh, so if you are like you're in a hotel. Like you're in a hotel. Yeah, no.

That's so easy. So you don't have Europe, you cut off from everyone. And they also are hearing everybody else's, you know, little story so it's like, oh, okay, this person's feeling, this way, and this person's feeling, this way. So let's make this happen. Yeah, they can say like influence. They have influence. So I don't this happen. Yeah, they can say like influence. They have influence.

So I don't ever like to say it's not real because it is real, but there's a lot of forces at play that are just not the same as real life. Okay, so the producer, are they trying to basically be your friend and then influence decisions that you made? I know I always try to be careful. It's not that I don't think that producers

didn't care about me at all, but they also have to, it's their job. To make a TV. To make a TV. So when I first went on, I was like, oh, I don't think my person's here. That's so scary. Now I'm the bachelor at it.

And I have to do like, I don't remember eight, nine, something weeks of this. And then you're at the end of it. And it's like, I'm supposed to get engaged. Kind of like, knowing you're going to get engaged, but like, is it going to happen? And Like, I think all those feelings kind of came up again, but in that moment being like, am I making the right decision? I don't know. I think you've raised home you're making the right decision. I'm so not sure because I just broke up with the

guy two days ago and I have to break up with the guy today and get engaged today. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful.

That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful.

That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so stressful. That's so again. And I think that kind of happened for me. Yeah, like that like influenced your engagement. This episode is sponsored by Rocket Money. It seems like there's literally subscriptions

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That's rocketmoney.com slash unplanned. Rocketmoney.com slash unplanned. That's rocketmoney.com slash unplanned. Rocketmoney.com slash unplanned. Back to the episode. What is it like being gay to someone that was in the public eye in that exact way, like, on the Bachelor Red? Yeah, it's been a journey for sure. I mean, do you watch the season?

Yeah, I have to be watching all those. I stopped and seen it. Okay. And I don't think I would watch her season. Yeah. Okay. Maybe at some point. I don't know, it's just like. Yeah. Okay. Maybe at some point. I don't know, it's just like, do I wanna watch, you know, every episode her making out

with multiple guys? Yeah, also did you watch it back? Or is that like, I watched it when it was happening. I mean, I was there and then I watched it when it aired. I wanna watch her on the Bachelor. I wanna see her on Cold Season. I mean, it's not, she doesn't have a whole lot of air time, but I think that would be more fun than watching her as a vaturette.

Yeah, I think there's, so you haven't seen either. No, I mean, I've seen clips and, you know, I get tagged and stuff every now and then, I've seen- For that just like on YouTube or take care of everything. Yeah, and I've seen most of her dancing with the stars, dances, and I watch all of special forces. So I mean, I'll go back to the stars, dances, and I watch all of Special Forces. So I mean, I'll go back to the bachelor days at some point.

Does that make you uncomfortable having so much of that time of your life, like public, just completely out there, and you can't really control that, you know? The dating stuff, yeah. I think so, because I think there's a warped view of me and dating and love because like maybe I responded and reacted in ways that maybe wouldn't have if it wasn't that it was a TV show.

Not that I knew it was a TV show, it's just my friends weren't there to be like, what are you doing? I didn't come to the law. I felt like. I felt like. I felt like. I felt like. I felt like.

I felt like. I felt like. I felt like. I felt like. I felt like. So I think sometimes I can get a little self-conscious about it, being like, oh, why did people like me or why are people still interested in a piece of who I still am, or is it a piece that's like long gone or a piece that just happened in this editing that kind of made me look this way? I think that can be what's hard for me. Do you feel like people got an accurate representation

of who you are as a person on the Bachelor? And on the Bachelor at? I think I was definitely like authentic for everything that was at play at that time, but I don't think a lot of the things and the ways that I reacted responded, had conversations or anything that would actually happen in real life.

And I think I got an accurate representation of me at that stage of my life. I was 24. I was a youngest bachelor at. So like and just my life before I was very sheltered, lived in a small town, Alabama, never left. I went to school and I was so sheltered. Yes. Yeah. That's us. And then I went off into LA and I felt like I kind of found. I thought I found myself and was like actually had a world opened up to me, which I think was amazing and I'm so thankful.

But that was the first time that it opened up for me. And so that was all captured on camera too. And it's like, if you could go back and do it all over again, would you have gone on the batch direct? Would you change the past or do you feel like because of the life that you lived, it's made you who you are today? No, I'm like, I wouldn't have not gone on those shows. I think there's been a lot of benefit, not just career-wise, but obviously, but like I said, it opened my world up in such an amazing way

in a lot of instances and circumstances. And it also was the first time that like anybody really asked me about how I felt was from a producer on a TV show. Like I, I had never had anybody like ask me how a certain thing made me feel. Producers are there to like, you know, be your friend and help you in some way, kind of understand what you're feeling. Because only so much, you can see a person like make a face or, you know, somebody's being asked, you know, on a day and you're really like that person, you can see somebody

just be like, you know, happy for the person, but having someone then say you done it and you're like, how did you really feel? And it's like, how did I feel? I feel really disappointed because it reminded me of this that maybe like, I'm not always picked. I sometimes feel like, I'm not always chosen. And it's making you think that way for the first.

I never like thought like, you know, I would be like, you know, I was disappointed, but everybody gets disappointed. And it's like, no, but like, why did that make you feel disappointed? And I'm like, because I didn't get picked. And it's like, have you ever felt like you weren't chosen before? And it's like, wow. That's maybe maybe yeah. Maybe I was born to this.

Yes. That was the first time I've had any type of conversation like that in my life. And those are my favorite conversations to have. And I think where you learn the most about yourself and others. And it was really from that show. And I came back home and my mom was like, wow, like I changed so much and like really was more of an insightful individual from it, yeah. It almost sounds like it's a therapy session that they're recording. Like when they interview you, like I've never thought about it that way, but hearing all

those different storylines that they pull from in the TV show, it makes sense now how they do it, because they really go deep and get you to open up. So I'm sure that was probably like, nice for you to do that. It was helpful to like, talk out all of those feelings and express that, but then to have that shared on national television must be weird, to be so vulnerable, and then it's just all out there. Totally, but then in that same breath, I think because I learned how to have this conversations

and be so vulnerable, yes, it was weird watching people see that, but I don't think we would have met if it wasn't or connected if I hadn't learned how to have those types of conversations. Because he's seven years older than me, and also had gone through his own, like, you know, growth and change and journey with himself and understanding more of what he believes in who he is. And so I think because we have both kind of understood

the importance of having those vulnerable insightful conversations to create connection is how we were able to connect and in a way that I thought that hadn't happened I would have not known how to really show up authentically as myself. Yeah and we're on how you guys met you said you'd met on a dating app and you being a public figure did you recognize her how did that work? She had a very familiar face, but I had no idea who she was But I I googled her

Like 45 minutes before our first date and saw a bunch of YouTube videos of her doing She was basically doing a series on her getting back into the dating life after the basharat The videos almost scared me off. I mean they were Her going into the bathroom and be like, oh my gosh, this guy, this is not my guy. The food's good, but I'm gonna go back in and see what happens. You stuff like that.

Did you make a video like that on your first date? I didn't make it because I had my eye on her phone the entire time, but she went to the bathroom and I was, I sleep that phone there, yeah. Yeah, I was like, I had like thought about it, but honestly, as soon as I met him, I had also had a long day of other videos. So I was like, I'm tired.

No. I was your second date of the day, right? No, no. No, no. You're like, you're pulling two days. I was pulling two days. You were speed dating, you're trying to get all these things. Yeah, it was fun.

It was fun. Wow. I was loving dating at this point. Because I had just taken the pressure off of it. And I was like, I'm just gonna go back out there and they know me. They know me, they know me. If they don't, they don't, I really don't care.

I'm just gonna try to just like show up authentically. And we met at this little Mexican restaurant that was right in the neighborhood. I like bike there. And I just had a, you know, YouTube malfunctions. My camera was overheating and dying. And I was just stressed I was trying to do like another type of video.

And I was just irritated at the day. And we had talked and needed plan this day. And I was like, can we move it up? I need a drink. Oh my gosh. And he was like, yeah, sure. But how about this time? And I ended up still being like, and I, I rode my bike over there like no makeup on.

Like I just, it was a really like, I was being myself, just a mess. And I remember I got there and I kind of saw him from the side. I was like, oh, he's really cute. And I had like a beanie on my head. It was around this time of year. And I was like, okay, trying to like get myself ready. And I came in just like so flustered and he's so calm and just has more of like a calming energy. And I think he was just amused by my frazzledness. And I think I pretty quickly was like, okay, I don't know if I'm gonna record this one

because I kinda like it. Like I knew. When you were recording the date or just like your... I would go in and like when I would start a video, like just, you know, my phone, be like, okay, I'm going on a date, meet this guy. At this restaurant, he seems really cool, but we'll see how it's gonna go.

And then I would go, we would have the date and then I would have to go to the bathroom and then I would be like, okay, so here's all that happened. And then I knew, and like during the dinner, a film crew would come and like, no. Yeah, you were making content though, out of these days.

I would just vlog the day. Okay, be honest though, like, where you go on extra dates, because you're like, this is kind of a fun series. Like I, I was kind of mad at me, because I was like, this is fun, like this was a really fun, good content. Yeah. And she still tried to keep doing it.

I mean, I don't know if you're, No, I just couldn't date more. You're like, I still want to date, but I think in the back of your mind, you're kind of like, I want to date more so that I can continue my YouTube series. I totally, I totally, I feel like this must be in a really entertaining, to a lot of people.

It was a really good series, and I wanted to keep dating more people I mean, you know the followers they were eating it up All the girls rooting you on But then I met him and I'm like shoot like I don't need to like put out a video about him because then he'll If I want it cuz I was like I kind of want to go on another day with him. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. The gift giving season is upon us. It is upon us. I feel like it's kind of stressful. I'm really thankful though because I feel like we are bad. But whether or not your family gives gifts during the holidays, you get to define

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to get 10% off your first month. That's helphlp.com slash unplanned podcast. Back to the episode. So you just nested all up in any way so you know Hannah being a TV internet personality how did that make you feel going into the stating thing did you guys decide okay we're not gonna show our relationship on social media for X amount of months like how did you navigate all that did did that make you uncomfortable? I would be lying if I said I wasn't intimidated. At first I was definitely intimidated. I didn't

know anything about that world and honestly like she kind of coached me through it. So like we would get, we would ride bikes together and I would, we would, you know, be leaving each other and I would go to give her a kiss on the cheek or something and she'd be like, she'd be like, not here, not here, just because like being on the, I remember that distinctly, being on the same Monica boardwalk. She was like, no, I'm not doing that here because someone was probably watching and you have to take a picture of that and then if it got out, we just weren't at the stage in our relationship yet to handle a lot of scrutiny or just eyeballs. Yeah, and I think it was hard at first. I remember like I would share also some media, but I would never show him like we I would be doing something we would be

just something together, but I would just show me and I could tell you are a little like. Just because I had never experienced it before like I'm very like if I think something I'm going to say it if I want to do something I just like I'm very... I was hot. Like if I think something, I'm gonna say it. If I want to do something, I just do it. And you know, thinking through actions and words to that extent, I just had an experience before. Yeah, and but I think you started to understand why. But it was weird at first when you're dating somebody

like why don't you wanna share in me or why are you being weird in front of other people? Because in a lot of circumstances that could be like a red flag But I also tried to like tell him pretty up front like trust me like is very hard when you're like starting a new relationship Or like in a relationship to have a lot of people like chiming in just personally because then I'm gonna be like, ooh, what are they saying? I don't wanna be with him or whatever. And I didn't want that to be anything that weighed my decisions because I already had anxiety and relationships

of just like, who do I wanna be with? Do I want it to be like actually dating someone? I just wanted to date around. You know, so I didn't need anybody else to question or look into things like. Because it's weird because like someone could get a hold of a 13-second clip of us not like being super-lovy, devy and like putting a lot of attention on each other and be like, you guys aren't right for each other. They're not right for each other.

You need to be with someone that you left in the past. And like, I'd be lying If that said that didn't affect us especially during the beginning it affected you It affected me for sure I was like we don't have to be done Yeah, touch me right now like you know, but I think he wanted to make sure people New that we liked each other. Yeah, and I'm like we don't have to and I get it I'm like, but we don't, we don't have to, and I get it. I'm like, but we don't like, we don't always have to add

like where this couple that has, we're just like totally obsessed with each other and like, we are, but it's okay. People are gonna say that things about us regardless. They're gonna say you're either too clingy or they don't have any connection or they're perfect for each other or they're totally wrong.

Like that's always gonna be those different types of opinions out there, but it's hard on that level for sure. So then how long did you wait to go public with your relationship? We actually didn't even plan to go public. We were walking on Avakini, like on a rainy, it's Avakini on a rainy it's avakini. It's like in Venice Santa Monica area. It's a pretty like public place, but I don't even think we normally held hands We I remember now we had parked at the end of the street and we were holding hands like right before like we got on the street

But somebody must Like a popper out see which it's not that I always have popper out see, but somebody must have, like a paparazzi, which it's not that I always have paparazzi, but I guess when it comes to like dating and stuff, had followed us and saw that we were holding hands right before we got on Abbot Kinney. But like, there was a whole paparazzi episode about like them staking it out

and like finding out where you live and then following us for a new picking up. Because we weren't being like, when we got on the like regular like pretty open. There's lots of people on have it. Kenny like we weren't holding hands or just like chillin laughing, but they caught it. Caught us. I guess before that's great. Yeah, we have so many problems with the pop rock.

Yeah, they just come after us. It's so annoying. No, we don't. They'll be like, brand don't think. Yeah. But, um, yeah, so that kind of... That's weird though, to just like be out in public and someone snaps a photo of you.

Yeah. We've never had that, but it is weird. I'm sure you probably had a fan that was maybe taking a video of you in public. 1000s. We've had that happen in like Disney and we just... No. I just...

I was in the awkward stage of pregnancy and it was the first time like I was in a bikini and people are taking pictures like so were literally four feet from me I was like maybe not yeah that would be great. Yeah, so you that's kind of bizarre like that like they kind of took your story and Yeah, so when you weren't necessarily trying to do that. Yeah, we didn't really decide when, but it had been a good amount of time, I feel like, but then we just kind of slowly started showing our relationship and it was also a COVID relationship. So it started pretty, you know, we could only do so much.

Like I remember that was like a big day we got to go out. A lot of our relationship was at each other's place, or even on the beach. It was kind of weird back then. You couldn't always just be outside. It was very weird. So we got close really quickly. I want to ask you, what was it like telling your family,

you might have seen her before. This girl that I'm bringing home, I know a lot about her, they have any kind of reaction to that. I don't think so, I just, I think, my mom and dad thought it was cool. But they warn you at all, like be careful with the spatula record.

Not at all, they're just not, I don't know, they, we don't really have those kind of conversations anyway, but it was, it was more just like cool, can't wait to meet her. Yeah, see. And then my brother, who I lived with with my younger brother, we lived together in Venice. He was down from the from the gig. I mean, he was like, she seems cool and can't wait to meet it like all that kind

of stuff. So at least was a fan of the show. Yeah. My sister-in-law definitely knew who she was and was super excited about it. Other than that, my family doesn't get like overly excited about anything. No. No. So they were just like cool. Can't wait to meet her, bring her for

Thanksgiving or Christmas. I mean, love that. But it'll be funny now, like, his dad will keep up with things and like, I saw you did something. My dad is like number one fan. Yeah, that's so funny. Yeah, so now they're more into it for sure. You must be pretty good at dancing since you like literally won dancing with the stars. You have a dance background? I'm assuming. I dance when I was younger, yes, growing up, but I feel like it's so weird. I have a complex with dance, but I just feel like a lot of people do.

Even though I win, I still sometimes don't think I can dance. I know it's weird, but yeah, I can, I have rhythm sometimes but I also can be like super stiff Yeah, I guess I can do it. What's that show so nerve-racking because I think that we both have like backgrounds and dance from yeah from take talk, you know, yeah From like being kids and dance class and doing theater and stuff. Yeah, I would be so stressed thinking about learning Something on you learn on a Monday and perform it on a no you you perform on a Monday You start learning you would start learning on like the Tuesday on you learn on a Monday and perform it on a no you you perform on a Monday you start learning you start learning on like the Tuesday that's what we perform on

the Monday and then it usually has two three dances and you have the huge live audience which would almost be more stressful to me than the fact that because you can kind of separate like it's just a camera even though it is being broadcasted to so many people but like that's so it was crazy Where you stressed out I was I Was so stressed out and I think after everything I In a year I was on bachelor bachelor Right, so like I was on like 30 something

Mondays of of the year on. And so it was right after Bachelorette and it had not gone right. And I was like, I have to win. And I just, that's all I did. I just went to my like little apartment that had like nothing in it in LA and dance. And then, but dance for like eight hours a day. And talk about nerves. Like we went and saw, but dance for like eight hours a day. And talk about nerves. Like we went and saw Matt James dance.

And before like seeing them on the side of the stage about to walk out, like my heart was going like, yeah, it's crazy. It's like I may imagine what you went through every single. There's like these little clicks that started, it's like, because it's the crowd so loud and that's like what let's you know.

You can click track in your ear. No, but they'll have it but you can barely hear it. That's how that's to let the dancers know it's about to start because it's so loud in there. Oh my god. You don't know which click you're on to. You're like, okay, I just got to be ready. And yeah, there's no, you know, there's no doing it over.

And like you see that you see the dancers and each of them kind of prep differently, but some are like super frantic, can't stop walking. Some are just like stone cold, just like breathing almost like closing their eyes. Like people handle it differently, but you can feel the nervous energy. Today's episode is sponsored by Seeky. We have recently become sports fans. Yes, we like going to suns games now. Yes, and we've been looking to find the best deal on suns tickets. Yes. And oftentimes we find ourselves scrolling through SeatGeek because they just make it so user friendly.

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That's $20 off your first purchase with promo code unplanned make sure you click the link in the description to download the app now back to the episode But it was I mean it's such a cool experience. I'm so glad I got to do it. Oh, yeah, I would love I was not like I said a Lot was happening in that year That was before I knew how to a lot was happening in that year. That was before I knew how to cope with big feelings. So that's why I think I just really went into like, I have to win, I have to do this, which I did, but I don't think I got to fully enjoy the experience,

the way that I would have loved to just like, it's such a cool show. But when you're so scared and tense and just want to win, because you think that's the only thing that matters, there's a part of it that you can't fully enjoy. So, I would change that or I'd love to go back and be able to do that again, but it was really fun. Yeah, your determination is something that stands out to me. Yeah.

Like you're saying, I have to win. I had to, and I feel like that carries on to you being in the special forces as well. Like that's crazy. You're mental. Well, you want special forces, right? Yeah. Yeah, I do really well in, which is not like real life. So a lot of these things that I've gotten to do

are reality TV, because they are real. Everything's real. But it's not real life, these experiences that you go through where you don't have a phone, you're cut off from all of their responsibilities. I do great in anything where it's like you have one focus and you do this thing. And I'm like, I can do this.

It's really easy for me to, I hate to work, it's dissociation, it's totally dissociation. I can dissociate from everything else stuff for the one thing. And I think that's what has helped me probably now looking back at all my, you know, trauma from the meal. I have some type of trauma. I think that's my coping mechanism is to just be able to focus on one thing and do that very well. And in these shows and experiences, I was able to do that. So I think that's part of it, but I do think there's a resilience of

in every single one of the situations, I had some pretty low, lows and being able to be like, all right, well, this is what we're doing right now. And we're going to figure out a way to get back up. And so I think there's a resilience there that I'm trying to remind myself that it's not just the, oh, I can dissociate. It's like, no, you have resilience and that's how you've been able to get through some of these really intense experiences.

Yeah. Did you get interrogated for 12 hours straight on the show? Yeah, I was like 10, 12 hours, I don't really know how long. I know. That was pretty tough, because it's not like fully the interrogation part of Special Forces. It's like very into the show, it was 10 days. And the last day they keep you fully sleep deprived, and you have to learn this whole mission you have to do.

And it's like fully, we were out in the Jordanian desert. We have to run three miles through the desert while you're being like chased by dogs and there's helicopters and there's whole thing. Then you get captured. You haven't slept for a day. You get captured and that's when you start having to go through the interrogation plus like, what is it called? I don't want to say torture, but it kind of is where you say in like stress positions and you have to listen to like really horrible, like sounds for 10 to 12 hours

while you're being interrogated and so on. What are these sounds? Is it like a free point? Like a free point. No. No. No. Me literally crack the mother's screaming.

Like I say mothers, I think that's what I like, Oh, no. Me literally cracking mothers. No. No. I saw mothers. I think that's what I was like, but like a woman, a woman like screaming bloody murder. No, I met all scraping together. Oh my God. That like sound, like that really horrible dial tone sound. And then like a pig, it was like a pig eating.

It sounded like it was really horrible. Oh my God. While you're standing with like your hands up for an hour straight and then they would put you down on the ground with like your legs flexed. So like this is tight like laying down or criss-cross. That's horrible. That's literally horrible. You can't see because you have a mask and a thing on. So I would just be like in your so tired so that you're falling asleep and thing on. So I would just be like, in your so tired, so that you're falling asleep and waking up and I would just be crying. And this will be ever soon, this has to be ever soon,

but it was really tough. And then you'll be. And then you'll challenges that special forces are brought through. They have to do it for 24 hours. Oh gosh. So it's everything we did gave me like a big appreciation for people that are like in our special forces, but we did only a small amount of what they have to do. But it was

the hardest thing we ever done for sure. Which challenge was the scariest or most difficult challenge? That was the most difficult for me. It's interesting. Everybody says things differently. Like the interrogation for a lot of people was hard when they have to like remember the story that we learned like, you know, the day before about why we're getting captured and how to because it's all simulation of like what would happen if you got captured by the enemy. Yeah. And these type of things would happen to you like that part. I was able to handle myself pretty well, have a pretty good memory.

So I knew what I needed to say and kind of kept really in control, but it was those sounds that really bothered me the most, actually. I just like got in my head a lot and I was so tired. And then you have to like keep your hands up of your head. And I just felt like I was going crazy. Yeah. That was the hardest for me for sure.

Was it ever a moment that you felt like you were going to die? Um, I kept telling myself this is me and their cameras, their cameras somewhere, even that I can't see them. I can't die. They're not going to let me die on TV. Oh my god. That's why I kept telling myself. I was like, because I thought I could. So I'm like, Hannah, they're not going to let you die on TV. They're not going to let you die on TV, that's why I kept telling myself. I was like, because I thought I could. So I'm like, Hannah, they're not gonna let you die on TV.

They're not gonna let you die on TV. That's why I just kept telling myself. So I couldn't think that I was gonna die. There were times when I'm like, my body feels like it's about to break and I don't wanna do this anymore, but. I'm super impressed by that, because I feel like people can see,

oh, like the bachelor, the bachelor at, like they don't have to work hard. They're not like determined. They're hard working. And also a passionate girl, yeah, which comes with its own stereotype. I feel like people just assume, oh, that's not that hard, but it's like, it's clear that that's not true based off of, like, you want it. Yeah. You want special forces. Like, you, you had the stamina and determination to go through something that literally special forces people are put through. You know what I think it is definitely the mental stuff. Physically, I think it's also knowing you aren't, I knew I wasn't the best there.

Like, off my performance, like, going in, where a lot of these are like Olympic gold medalists, athletes, professional athletes, and I think they're used to being the best and know what they're doing. And they're certain things. Where for me, the top and their area. Yes, I've always been judged by other people on things that really can't control. And never, I guess, had that feeling of like,

I went in and feeling of like, I went in and knowing like, oh, I don't have all the things that you think are gonna make the best in here. So I think I came in with like a humility about me of like, I know that I am not the person that has all the like, qualities on paper that you're like, oh, can do this. But I've been in this type of situation before

and so I'm just gonna like just keep going. And I just, the only way they cook you off is if you quit, so you just don't quit. Yeah. So you can't quit even when you're the worst. And I think sometimes it's like, when people would start failing, because you would fail parts of the course,

different tasks, like people failed. And you could still, you would still say, but I stay, but I think people who were in that experience when they failed and would get like beaten up, they had an experience that maybe in that type of way or had in a long time and then with the mental exhaustion that you just have from the environment that you're living in, it can just be like too much.

Yeah. I don't know. I just, I was able to just feel like, I guess this is my life now. I don't not gonna remember that I could like go be in a nice bed right now. Like, this is how I live. This is, this will be the thing and that. When did that all get filmed? Last June of 2022.

And you guys weren't in contact able to contact No, oh gosh was that hard for you to watch the show and see Hannah going through all these really challenging Thanks, no it wasn't he cuz we knew that I you know that she won Yeah, I know she won, but also I just I don't know I he thought it was so cool I just know how tough she is so I wasn't worried about her like durability or anything. Yeah. If anything, I was like, you know, I kind of knew that she was going to do well. Maybe you and Hannah Abbey should do a Spartan race because have you done Spartan race before?

No, have you done that? Abbey loves those. They're so fun. She's like, this woman does like CrossFit. She's so Abbey's Jack, by the way. I don't know if you've got these. Oh my god. I was so happy. Abbey's very Jack. Do you do CrossFit? I use Sue. I don't do, I'm gonna be... Oh my god, I was like, I was very Jack. Do you do CrossFit? I use Sue. I literally don't even do it right now. But like, I don't know, I feel like I see a similarity there.

Like you guys can totally do some sort of CrossFit. I did start doing CrossFit after this show. And because I was like, this has shown me that I am capable of doing more than I thought I could. But also like there were some strength things that like I just didn't know how to do like we had a climber rope but I didn't know how to climb a rope. I kind of had to know how to do that. Cross them to teach you that. And that was one of the first things I was like I have to learn how to climb the rope. And I can climb the rope now push ups I can do like pull ups

I can do like one and I'm still like working on that, but that's why I wanted to do it, but that's still a whole different beast in itself. Like I'm still 1,000% the worst person at our CrossFit gym. Hey, real quick, we wanted to let you guys know our new merch is here and it's not just new, it's our first ever podcast merch.

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You can't be like, merch, but I can't because that we get coffee everywhere. Yeah, you get coffee in our camera. I want to use today. You are on today. I'm rather sleep deprived, but I'm sorry. Is that what you need to go take a nap? Can we talk about this merch again?

Basically, all I wanted to say is if we see you guys in public wearing the merch, we totally need to get a picture. If we see you out and about, we would love to get a photo with you. You would be Jolly about that. Yes. And you also would be Jolly,

anyone wearing this hoodie? Because it's so thinkin' comfortable. Jolly's my parents. Whenever people say hi to us, like my parents are there. They're so proud. They always like, let me take a picture. Yeah, my parents are so sweet.

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Just go to unplayedpodcast.com to buy it. Link in description. Now, back to the episode. So we've talked a lot about, you know, TV shows, literally getting interrogated for 12 hours. That's insane. I still can't believe you did that. But I'm so curious since you guys are going to get married.

Yeah, have you started wedding planning? Yeah, wedding planning. Have you guys talked about how many kids you want? Have you had those conversations? Because like, there's a lot of conversations to have. There's a lot of things that you need to be aligned on. And what's scary is like, I don't think it's physically possible to talk about everything that you need to talk about,

right? Because like, people change, we were just talking about that on our podcast the other day. But like, what have you guys discussed before marriage that you're making sure you're on the same page on as far as like kids and all that? I mean, first of all, when the cause of wedding planning, no, we have not done that. It's just been a very busy season for us.

I mean, wedding planning wise, we just need to figure out where we want to do it. That's the first step. We're like either destination wedding or do it, somewhere kind of close to home. But as far as talking about future, I mean, I've always wanted to have kids. I feel like I was born to be a dad.

She knows that I think, you know, with you, you're kind of, you think about the changes that might happen once kids come. Yeah, I think it, you're good. I just think there's a little bit of uncertainty and anxiety there bringing other, you know, life forms into the world. Yeah.

Whereas I'm like, you know, a couple years away, I think we still need to figure out, you know, life forms into the world. Yeah. Whereas I'm like, you know, a couple years away, I think we still need to figure out, you know, where you are and where we both can meet. It's not, I definitely think at some point, I want to have kids. I think it's very important for me because there is an age difference. It's very clear that that's not something

I'm like fully ready for just yet. There's a lot that I still want to do And it's not that I don't think kids allow you to still be able to do those things But it changes your focus. I think there's a way that it can it can work But I know me I know myself and I think that's Something that I have to it's very important that we've had these conversations of like, I know myself and I know that I still have some things that I need to work on before I feel really comfortable taking that role as mom because I know I'll take it very seriously.

And so we, I feel like he would have a child tomorrow. But I feel sooner than you. But I feel like it's been very clear on my side and he's been able to understand that that is not something that I'm wanting in the next foreseeable future. I really would like to get married and then have some time to still just be us before that like happens really right up right away.

Is there a timeline you guys have talked about or is there like a number of kids that you think you might have some time in the future? Look, I think what's really hard for women is there is this ticking clock and I'm 29 and I already have some stuff that you know we'll have to pay attention to like if we want to have babies like what we're gonna do for that so I think that is kind of putting this time this time on that I'm really resisting that's hard but it's something that we've talked about and I don't look we're not married yet And I don't want to have kids before we are married So I think we just have to get married first and then we'll start figuring out What we need to do as far as making sure that

That's possible for us I try I can get really like I said, like I can start wearing and questioning things really easily and I just have to keep reminding myself that we are not even at, we'll cross that bridge when we get there. Yeah, but we've had a lot of practice. We have a dog and he's been, you know, really interesting. And it's been awesome, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Would you describe yourself? Oh, sorry. I was just going to say, no, it's weird. We have two kids, but it does seem intimidating in getting a dog because we started talking about it now I was like a dog is a lot We can't do that. Yeah, two babies are a lot of dog and a peck no no Yeah, I don't know actually could be so cute to get a dog for each of our kids one day That'd be kind of fun. It's no it sounded okay. I'm getting the vibe like would you say you're an indecisive at all?

Okay, cuz that's me like I'm Abby's a really quick decision maker Like she just knows like she makes decisions so fast and scary like her her engagement ring It was the first ring that she tried on she was like that's what I want I dated like I was like like So quick and me like I'm over here like well, I could do this option Well, I could do this and it's just like I can't freaking make up my mind I am the I feel like you need I feel like you need the balance Yeah, like if two people are really decisive. I feel like you're gonna butt heads. Yes If two people are indecisive everything's just gonna fall apart. Yes

Yes, and I feel like that's even like going back to our engagement Like he was like this happening. Yeah Okay, like it took off the stress because I could, I could sit here all day and go back and forth of, of why I should pick one thing or the other. So it's, yeah, it's like the timing. And so sometimes I think God just has to come in and decide for me. Someone's got to be the gas to the break. Someone's got to be the breaks to the gas. But's got to be the breaks to the gas. But I wanted to ask you, what's it like walking through life

with a partner that maybe, like you said yourself, are like, I kind of have a crisis quarterly, like what's it like being the partner walking through somebody so intimately like that? It's challenging at times, for sure. But I think everything that I've done up until now in my life has kind of prepared me for it.

I've been meditating every day for a little over 11 years now, and I feel like that, along with my newfound faith, has really just helped center me and align me. I just feel like I'm a little bit calmer more than she is. And when that kind of like, that wave comes through, I'm just kind of, I just kind of ride the wave but it makes it easier because of what I've done in my past up until this point. And meditating every day, wow, that's dedication.

Why did you start doing that? I think just lack of fulfillment. I felt like my life had become pretty mundane and there just wasn't a whole lot of just energy or life to it and I wanted to change it. And meditation was one of those things that I was reading in all these self-help books that was like the consistent thing

that all these people had been doing that brought them a lot of joy. So I read a book called 10% Happier by Dan Harris. It was all about meditation and how he had kind of a mental breakdown on air. He's a broadcast journalist. He started meditating and he just basically said the whole premise of the book is meditation made him 10% happier. So I kind of took that and ran within, started meditating every day, and I just saw things

open up for me after doing that. And how does one meditate? Like, what does that even look like? It's changed a lot, so I mean, there are definitely different modalities you can go down, but a lot of it is just, you know, 5, 10, 20 minute focus meditation, you focus on your breath, a mantra, you can literally sit in a prayer, you can sit and stare at a light. I mean, there's so many different ways you can do it,

but a lot of times it's me sitting down with my eyes closed listening to meditation music for 20 minutes. Whoa, okay. So it's literally like you can just do 20 minutes. It's not like you have to do a two hour long meditation. Right, right. And I have in there.

I mean, I definitely went down the rabbit hole of meditation and I've sat through some long meditations, but yeah, 20 minutes every morning, just witnessing my thoughts come up in my brain and then coming back to whatever I'm focusing on. I will say you give off a very peaceful vibe. I appreciate it. And then mostly, you're like, crazy.

I can see why you guys work together then. It just fits. You know? I think we should meditate honestly. Honestly, yeah, you're inspiring. Like, I really need to start meditating. I feel like I'm a little high strong and crazy sometimes. Yeah, you can admit it.

Yeah, but it's funny even you just saying what your meditation looks like. I'm realizing there might be things in my life that I that aren't technically meditation, but might give give off some of those same benefits that meditation would give off. Like if I'm stressed, I'll go and ride my one wheel. It's like an electric skateboard. I just listen to EDM music for 20 minutes. Yeah, yeah. That might not be the most relaxing thing, but for me, like, EDM and meditation music is probably pretty. It'm basically so happy though, I don't know. Well, I mean, anything that brings you

into the present moment is what I consider meditation. So I mean, I do jujitsu every day. Ooh, that's cool. You can't think about anything other than surviving. So that is a form of meditation to me, for sure. Jujitsu, that's like pretty intense, right? Very intense. Are you sparring with other guys

and just basically trying to take each other out? Pretty much, yeah. That's cool. I wanna try that. Come try it. That sounds awesome. I feel like I've always wanted to be the tough guy so like if there's ever a situation where someone

that I love is like threatened, I wanna be able to take someone down. That is the only reason I do it. Yeah. I wanna be the superhero in a situation. She's like strong. Not that I'm like aggressive. I just want to know how to like practice self-defense

if I ever needed to use that. So that's really cool that you do that. Very cool. Well, Han, I know that you have a podcast that you just launched recently as well as a new book. Do you want to tell us more about those exciting things happening in your life? Yeah, so I started my own podcast in July. It's called Better Tomorrow with Hannah Brown.

And like we kind of talked about, had this like really intense, a few years of my life, where I grew up a lot and kind of started having these more insightful big conversations, but also like big life changes and didn't really know how to handle all that. And for the first time in my life, really started having bigger conversations, going to therapy and just trying to figure out, like I've always worried been a little bit uptight about some things.

And then when that all happened, it's like, how do I not feel like this all the time? Just so I listened to this podcast one day and it was, this guy was, I think it was Oprah's podcast. He said to ask yourself, you know, am I better today than I was yesterday and ask yourself that every day and I was like, oh my gosh, I'm doing this. And I had a posted card and I put it in this hallway mirror

that I walked by and I would see it every day and ask myself like that question and I would see it every day and ask myself like that question and it would make me take an account of what was happening that day. And did I really up level in some way? Did I feel more inspired and encouraged? And some days it was yes, which was awesome, but there would be some days that it was no. And by taking that account, it really allowed me to not have another day that was followed up with another no. Because I took that small, you know, a few seconds, a minute or so to just like assess what

could be a little better, what could have been a better decision than I can make going into the following day. So, that's where I came up with the idea of the podcast is having conversations with people who, what decisions, what life changes that they go through that got into this better tomorrow. And it's been really, really awesome to be able to have a platform to have longer form conversation and really get to connect with not only my guests but with my community in a different way because I mean there's so much noise out there. There's so much entertainment or things that we can do that just kind of numb us and so what is And so what is it that I can really give of value to those people who are taking the time to

You know spend 30 minutes an hour with me and like yeah, can Can I make sure that I'm being really responsible for that time and making sure they feel better than they did when they press a place That's like the whole goal the the is to just make people feel a little bit better than they did yesterday. And then with that, I've been working on a book for a while now. I've written a book that was nonfiction about my life. I call it like my quarter life memoir. And that was amazing and that was in 2021. That was a really big undertaking to a lot.

It was a lot. That was really hard. And this is now fiction, which was, it's always been my favorite. I grew up like being an avid reader and loved romance. So this is a romcom. It's called Mistakes. We've never made. And I'm really, really excited for people to read it because I have done my market research I can say. And I feel

like it's everything that makes up an epic summer read. And I, you know, I'm not a full-time writer so I definitely found a great team that helped support me and made sure that all the thoughts and my ideas and everything that I wanted from these characters was made possible on the page. But it was such a collaborative experience and it was so fun to have. It was actually just a group of women that we all worked together to make sure that this is like everything you want in your next summery on the beach. It follows Emma who's kind of a little bit type A, a little up type, and she is trying to help her friend, Sybil, who was a runaway bride, not make the mistake of her life and she has to find the help of her once enemy, thin, who broke her heart and they had a lot of different, almost in their relationships and

our relationship in their past and then they have to come together to kind of find a civil one along the way might fall in love. Wow. It's fun. I can't wait to run. Yeah, I'm just a big like, look for him. So yeah, I feel like Abby will definitely be reading that book on the beach. No, it's really, I'm very proud of it. A lot of hard work went into it. Sure.

I'm thinking Emily Henry type book. Cool. People who meet on vacation type vibe. So it's awesome. It'll be out May, May, 2024. I've got to ask. There's been some books, Abbie's read some Ramcom books, where there's like a sexy, like every page.

Is that this, is that this book? Or what? There was one book you were like, Matt, this one is like, I cannot read this right now. Right. Like it was, it was insane. So there's definitely some steamy part. For sure.

But it's a gradual thing. It's not, I know what you're talking about. It's tasteful. And I think it shows every part of a relationship and falling in love. I saw your cover art. Yeah, it's like such a cute book to put on shelf-tare. It's very beautiful. I know.

I was very. It was important for me for it to be a really pretty cover that called People's Eye and it's like a beautiful watercolor kind of grand canyon. Maybe there might be something on the road trip along the way that kind of was important a place in the plot of the story. So yeah, it looks really good and it's definitely got the pretty pinks and watercolor look, but yeah, let's add them. Have you read the book? Not yet. I'm going to buy it on the shelves like everybody is. Okay. Wait, do you have a launch date? Yes, it's May 7th. Okay, that's super exciting. 24. So you can pre-order now and you can get it wherever books are sold.

Pre-orders are great. So that would be really awesome for people to support. And I'm so confident in the product that I'm like, you're gonna love it. Is it finished at this point? Are you like wrapping things up? It's finished, yes. We're actually working on book two.

Wow. Yeah. So started that, that will be, we have a while before that one comes out, but yeah, all the editing is, it's getting crisp. It's there. Wow. Congratulations.

That's super exciting. Thank you. Hannah Brown, the podcaster, author, special force dancer. Are you going to be joining the special forces now that you like, you know, won the TV show? I, I, no. Are you going to be joining the Special Forces now that you like, you know, won the TV show? I... No. I respect the heck out of them. I really admire what people do to serve our country, but I don't know if I can do that again.

And as always, this is where we say peace out dudes. End out on our website. Okay, got it. Three, two, one. Peace out dudes. 3, 2, 1, peace out!