The Weekly Planet - 187 Zack Snyder Departs Justice League & Pirates 5
Episode Date: May 29, 2017Alright. Pirates of the Caribbean Dead Men Don’t Salazar’s Revenge is out and we had to see it and we also talked about it. We also discuss some terrible news for Zack Snyder, changes for Jus...tice League, new trailers for Spider-man Homecoming, Dark Universe and Game of Thrones plus news of Star Wars, Terminator, Resident Evil, New Mutants, Uncharted and the death of a 007 legend. Thanks for listening!Aliens Arcade Caravan Of Garbage: https://goo.gl/Vt7XjTAlien Covenant Easter Eggs: https://t.co/ZzvKJnORKt1:40 RIP Roger Moore7:08 Resident Evil reboot11:06 Game Of Thrones trailer17:32 Dark Universe Universe trailer24:15 Spider-man Homecoming trailer29:35 Zack Snyder leaves Justice League34:20 Justice League Dark update`35:53 New Mutants is a horror movie37:24 Star Wars & Vanity Fair40:53 Tom Holland to play Nathan Drake47:08 The Terminator reboot49:32 Pirates 5 Spoiler Review1:22:36 What We Reading/What We Gonna Read1:29:11 Letters It’s Time For LettersBuy the Pirates of the Caribbean 1-5 Collection on Amazon: https://amzn.to/2ICOesFThe Weekly Planet YouTube Channel: https://goo.gl/1ZQFGHFind our T-Shirts here: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/mr-sunday-movies Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret, the other a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+. Mason, it's the Weekly Planet.
We're here.
Yes.
But because, as is tradition, though we didn't do it last year,
when it's your birthday, you get to do the introduction.
Oh, I forgot about that. All right. As a gift. It's my gift to you. Oh, I don't like it, though we didn't do it last year, when it's your birthday, you get to do the introduction. Oh, I forgot about that.
All right.
As a gift.
It's my gift to you.
Oh, I don't like it, though.
It's bad.
Anyway, happy birthday to me.
Hey, everybody.
Welcome to another episode of the Weekly Planet.
Fishy podcast, thecomicbookmovie.com.
It's me, Maso.
And as always, a man who constantly throws me under the bus.
It's James, Mr. Sunday Movies.
Hey, I'm also here.
Yeah, I'm here.
I've got a dog here.
You do.
It's pretty good.
It's a birthday dog.
You can keep that dog.
Oh, for my birthday?
It's a gift, yeah.
You get two gifts.
She seems more trouble than she's worth, if I'm honest.
She is.
All right.
So, we've got a bit of bad news to start off with.
There's a bit of bad news this week in general.
My birthday's good news, all right?
Okay, you're right.
Moving into your late 30s is good news.
I'm still in...
No, wait, I'm in my...
You're still mid-30s.
I'm in my later middle 30s.
Yeah, I guess.
I'm 36.
Okay, yeah, I'm trying to think of that.
Oh, you're 36.
That's crazy.
Oh, no.
It's weird because I knew you when you weren't 36, you know?
That's true, yeah.
Oh, memories.
What an era.
I've also known you when you're not 36, you know? That's true, yeah. Oh, memories. What an era. I've also known you when you're not 36.
That's correct, yeah.
All right, so Roger Moore passed away.
Anyway, a bit of banter.
A bit of bloody banter.
Now bad news.
Yeah, that's right.
Roger Moore's passed away at the age of 89.
Very sad.
Short battle with cancer.
I mean, 89 is a good innings.
Yeah.
Maybe not in Hollywood.
As we say every week, people will be mulled in and they'll be like,
stop talking about how age is a good or bad for Hollywood. As we say every week, people will be mauled in and they'll be like, stop talking about how ages are good or bad for Hollywood.
We'll be like, 60, that's not good for Hollywood years.
We don't know.
We just need something to say, all right?
That's it.
Anyway, the first of the Bonds to die.
Yeah, which is crazy, right?
Yeah.
Well, he's-
The oldest, I think.
I think he's the oldest, yeah.
So Sean Connery would have to be, what, two years younger than him, maybe?
Something like that, yeah.
Yeah.
Sean Connery's been quiet. I don't know whether- well, Sean Connery's have to be, what, two years younger than him maybe? Something like that, yeah. Sean Connery's been quiet.
I don't know whether...
Well, Sean Connery's obviously retired.
Yes.
But what's he doing?
Like, is he...
I imagine him beekeeping.
Okay, right, yeah.
Angrily.
He's angrily beekeeping is what he's doing.
Just, like, shaking the hives.
Yeah, I think so, yeah.
Not in a suit.
Just...
Yeah, no, just...
Yeah.
Just in a kilt.
Just in a kilt and a jumper, probably.
But, yeah, Roger he got he bought a a different take to bond he was this he was the
the smoothest and funnest bond probably he was definitely the most ridiculous yeah absolutely i
look we got a solid we got a solid uh action comedic performer here let's make all the
movies he's in really ridiculous so So, you know, we had...
I think his high point for me was The Spy Who Loved Me,
where, of course, we have a...
Is that the first one he did?
No, it's like the middle...
The first one he did was Live and Let Die.
That's right, yeah.
But it was the one where we have an evil mastermind
attempting to build a colony under the sea
and then destroy humanity on the surface world with nuclear weapons.
Makes sense.
And of course we had the Lotus Esprit that turns into a submarine.
That's right.
That was a big deal at the time.
We had Jaws.
Yeah, we had Jaws.
Great stuff.
Did Jaws carry over a few movies, didn't it?
Yes, he was in Moonraker as well.
Yeah, yeah.
Moonraker's no good.
Or is it?
Ah, look.
You know what?
I haven't watched all the Conner? you know what I've watched all
I haven't watched all
the Connery runs
Connery bonds
but I have watched
all the Roger Moore ones
we watched them together
yeah
because they're fun
they're ridiculous
and they're fun
and he's great
so yeah
I like that he is
a different bond
than Connery
and Dalton
I think he kind of
he kind of set the
set the
the tone for
for a shifting bond
because I feel like
Lazenby well I haven't actually seen that movie,
but Lazenby is just Sean Connery light.
Yeah, he is.
But Roger Moore is his own thing.
That's true, yeah.
He's his own man.
He took on the role when he was like 46 as well.
Yeah, prior to that, he'd also been the Saint on TV.
I think he was originally considered for Bond early on as well,
but he couldn't do it for whatever other reason.
Well, I say they should cast him as Bond.
I think he'd be good.
You're okay with it?
Yeah.
So this is, I thought I'd heard all the Bonds,
like all the Roger Moore stories or all the Bond anecdotes,
but this was a new one.
So this was passed around the internet, so you may have seen it,
but there's a guy called, there's a filmmaker called Mark Haynes.
He's like a documentary filmmaker.
Yeah.
And when he was seven, he was in an airport in Nice,
in an airport lounge nice in an airport like lounge and with his grandpa and he saw over the other side of lounge or the waiting
area he saw james bond and he's like oh my god he's seen james bond on the tv and he's like i
gotta go get meet james bond so the grandpa takes him over and he's like my son says you're famous
like he didn't know who he was yeah son says you're famous uh can he have your autograph and then and he you know sits him down he asks him his name and he shakes his hand and
he signs the autograph and they go away and the kid looks down and he said he sees the autograph
doesn't say james bond it says roger moore and he's like what's going on here kind of thing and
so he goes back over to roger moore and he's like what's what's happening here and roger moore's
like look you're right you've got get out of here you've got me here
uh but i i have to sign it's me james bond but i have to sign my name as roger moore because
anyone here could be an agent of blofeld kind of thing and the kid's like oh my god i'm on i'm
i'm helping out james bond and he goes back and he's and he tells his grandpa no no no it's it's
correct that's this this is correct yeah that, that's correct. Several decades later, this man, Mark Haynes,
is working on a documentary for UNICEF
because Roger Moore famously worked for UNICEF for many years
for a salary of $1 a year.
That's not very good, is it?
No, it's quite bad.
Especially after tax as well.
Yeah, I know, right?
And he goes up to Roger Moore and he says,
listen, you probably don't remember this,
but I was in an airport in Nice.
I met you.
You were very nice.
Anyway, I just wanted to say hello kind of thing.
And Roger Moore's like, listen, I don't remember that,
but I'm glad you got to meet James Bond.
Anyway, the day of shooting ends and the guy's leaving for his car.
Roger Moore sidles up to him and says,
look, of course I remember our meeting in Nice,
but I couldn't say in there because agents of Blofeld could be anywhere.
Amazing.
30 years he waited.
The long con.
Yep.
Very good.
Yeah.
Oh, good on him.
So yeah, he'll obviously be missed.
What a legacy though.
All round good bloke.
Kept his hair.
He sure did.
Yeah.
Good on him.
Yeah.
Do you ever see The Saint?
I haven't seen The Saint.
Yeah, it used to be on like, it was one of those ones that was on at like 4.30 in the
afternoon.
Like so you'd get home from school and watch an episode of The Saint or the original Avengers.
Sure, yeah.
The John Statham appeal Avengers.
Did you see Val Kilmer's The Saint?
Cold fusion.
I don't know if I did.
Yeah. Did you? He does a good australian accent
is he australian no but he's the saint he can be he can be australian yeah that's true you're right
yeah he has he has many vague powers that's it you want some good news yes james wan yes to produce
a resident evil reboot oh reboot yeah we're done. Remember, there was...
No.
Everybody got cloned.
Yeah.
Everybody got run over by a tank or something.
On board, sure, yep.
Seven was the last one, I want to say.
No, but then after that, she was like, but there's still more work to be done.
I'm going to keep driving this way and fight more flying dragon zombies or whatever.
That's true.
So, are we just going to leave Mila Jovovich hanging?
Yes.
Are we just going to leave Alice out in the wilderness
yes
oh cool
what do you want Alice to do
no exactly
there's no more for her to do
she's going to be
scissor kicking rubber dogs
until the end of time
that's right
don't worry about that
yeah you're right
I think they want to reboot it
I'm guessing
I don't know this
yes
to make it more in line
with the games
because the movies
have nothing to do
with the games
no that's true
they took a sharp left turn
about four movies ago when they destroyed the entire world and made. No, that's true. They took a sharp left turn about four movies ago
when they destroyed the entire world and made it a desert.
That's right, yeah.
And then, yeah, you're right.
You can't turn it back in now because there's no way.
You can't rebuild society and bring back the billions of people that died.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, exactly, because there was like 5,000 people left on Earth, remember?
There was a countdown timer of people.
It was really specific.
How are they counting that?
Who knows?
And also, if you're in the army, like you're one of the few people left,
why are you volunteering to go and shoot the remaining people on Earth?
Yeah, right.
Who's going to buy all the viruses if you shoot all the people?
Yes.
We've talked about this.
That's right.
Anyway.
Anyway, reboot. Okay, that about this. That's all right. Anyway. Anyway, reboot.
Okay, that's fine.
I like James Wan.
Do you think it's going to be like the original,
like the very original game where it's like two people
investigating a house?
Yeah, I think it'll absolutely be that, yeah.
And it's a regular house.
It's not a house that's also a super secret government.
It's got a giant underground facility.
With lasers and artificial intelligence children and dogs ready
to be scissor kicked i think it's just primed to be but i think it's yeah well i haven't really
played the first resident evil game but it's a it's like a clockworky house isn't it with puzzles
and doors yeah and whatever so i'd imagine they'll be do a bit of that or they'll make it a bit more
like four which is the one that everybody loves. Or maybe even, actually, maybe it's a different thing.
Maybe it'll be like the new game where it's the hillbilly house
or whatever.
So I think whatever it is, I think they'll take it from the game.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because they're not really Resident Evil.
They're Resident Evil in name.
They're zombie movies.
Do you think they will get Milla Jovovich in a cameo role?
I think not initially because they want to distance themselves.
Sure, right.
But then.
Yeah.
Maybe.
When is this?
Is there a schedule for when this is going to come out?
I don't know.
Two years.
Let's say two years.
I feel you need at least two years.
Right.
To get the taste out of people's mouths, right?
Yeah, I guess so.
Do you think a lot of people will be upset that they're not continuing the Milo Jovovich
averse?
I guess. But at this point, it must just be the hardcore fans.
Right, yeah.
I mean, there's got to be...
I mean, they're fine.
Yeah, they are fine.
We saw one.
We've seen all or some of them, haven't we?
I've seen some to all of them.
Yeah, that's right.
But I reckon it's that kind of thing where they make their money back on the hardcore fans.
Yeah.
And they don't cost much, do they?
Yeah, and they keep costing less and less.
Yes.
So I think maybe they want to broaden out the reach here
and just be like, okay, let's have regular people watch them again.
Absolutely.
As opposed to irregular people who watch them now.
They cost less and less, but they look better every movie.
I mean, we say that.
Yeah.
We do say that, don't we?
Yeah.
Should we do one of those things where we watch all of them simultaneously on seven screens?
Who did that?
No, Red Letter Media watched them all in a row.
They watched Transformers all at once.
Yeah, great.
God, I give you a headache.
But no, I don't want to do that.
I never want to watch any of them ever again.
Okay.
You okay with that?
Three's pretty good.
Or is it?
I don't really remember.
No, never.
It's the only one I walked out of and went, okay.
Okay. It's the only one you ever out of and went, okay, okay.
It's the only one you ever walked out of.
The rest you're still in.
Did you know that?
Oh, no.
Yeah, you're still in multiple screenings of Resident Evil films.
All right.
What have we got next?
Game of Thrones, your favorite show.
No, it's not.
Your favorite show is back, Can't You Lie.
Only seven episodes of this season and six next season. Yeah. We just watched it again before before i think maybe you watched it for the first time i did for the show and i i said out
loud to myself mason that it looks amazing doesn't it look amazing as a show yeah god it's they they
make that budget really go a long way the substantial budget they have they make it
essentially unlimited money that hbo
has they they really stretch that they put it to work yeah do you think that there's a there's a
there's a scene set in some sort of war room and there's a map on the ground do you think that's
a real map like somebody's drawn it or do you think they've cgi'd a map i think most like an
hbo office floor no i think it's mostly real yeah do you think there's a guy in that society who has to keep repainting the map every time there's like...
Are you talking about the intro or are you talking about just in the show?
No, in the show.
No, I think they absolutely made that.
Okay, yeah.
A hundred percent.
That makes sense.
I was going to say, do you think there's a guy in that universe and his job is just to repaint the map?
Anytime somebody gets beheaded or eaten by dogs, they're just like, oh, well, he doesn't have that territory anymore.
Get the map guy.
He's never out of work.
Yeah, but he's very depressed all the time
because they tell him in graphic detail what happened every time.
It's very possible.
Are you excited for this in any way?
Look, I think I've said this before, but...
You hate the horrible...
I hate the horrible harshness of this reality,
but also I think we're getting to the pointy end of this universe
and there's a lot of action in this
in this trailer
I hope this season is all action
well it is
because I'm okay with that
they say seven episodes
I'm sick of intrigue
I'm sick of it
although I want action
and I want little people walking up hills
which is what we got
you're in luck man
so you don't like when little finger sidles up to someone
and is like
I say I'm gonna be the king
of the world
and this tree
look at my throats
yeah
no I don't like it
you don't like any of that
no
okay fair enough
no but that's
that's what this is gonna be
because we're well past
the books at this point
yeah
we're speeding towards
a conclusion
I like also
because every
every season
I don't think this season
did it as much
sorry the last season
did it as much
there's a recap episode at the start and there's a kind of a summary at the end yes because every season, I don't think this season did it as much. Sorry, the last season did it as much.
There's a recap episode at the start and there's a kind of a summary at the end.
Yes.
And it's just kind of, but I don't want that.
Right.
Just go straight into it.
I'll watch a 20-minute, HBO always do a 20-minute recap on their YouTube channel.
I always watch that.
But this season, this year I might try and watch them all before.
Surely nobody's coming in blind at this point.
Why would you?
Yeah, right? It's insane.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Though you seem to come in blind to most episodes. You would you yeah right it's insane yeah yeah though
you seem to come in blind to most episodes you're like who's what yeah no i show me the map again
because i forget every season yeah yeah you forgot who got eaten by dogs no it was the meanest man in
the universe yes exactly his name was bolton ramsay bolton yeah i got there with only the help of half his name.
So it looks like there's going to be plenty of dragon.
Yeah, okay.
Do you think there's still a chance,
and I think there might be still a chance of this,
but when there's been no confirmation or even hint at it,
that at the end of this they're going to do a movie,
like an actual cinematic movie?
No.
Fair enough.
No, you're probably right.
I mean, you can't rule it out, but it's a ballsy move,
and it's – has that ever – I was going to say –
Entourage.
I was going to say HBO, Sex and the City 1 and 2.
No, you're right.
Ballers, probably.
Yeah, ballers.
Yeah, no, you're right.
That's very possible.
What was I thinking?
They'll do it.
Yeah, all right.
Yeah, I mean, I'd like to see it, but yeah, I don't know.
But I also don't know whether there'd be...
No, it would be viable because they could do it relatively cheaply,
I'd imagine.
But also movies of television shows are rarely any good.
That's true.
Like it's a continuation because you lose a lot of the audience,
like Entourage.
But that's the thing also, Australia especially has wanted for years to be able to just
pay directly for game of thrones yeah and then watch it and walk away this is the perfect view
this will this will do very well in australia oh you're probably right yeah you're absolutely right
because in australia you can't just buy them on itunes initially you have to get sign up to sign
up to 70 bucks a month or whatever cable tv then whatever. You get 50 sport channels you don't want.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
Foxtel are in trouble though, it seems.
They're a bit of grief in terms of...
Sounds good, unless they choose to sponsor us,
in which case we'll help you out.
Get on board, everybody.
Yeah, get on board, guys.
Who do you think is going to win the Game of Thrones?
Who's going to be sitting on that Iron Throne?
Sir Jamie Lannister?
No, it's going be it's gonna be bloody
john snow yep um peter dinklage yep the actor the dink and and daenerys all stacked up like a totem
pole but that is very and then they think they've won but then like molten lead floods in from from
all corners of the room and they're all brutally killed in the most painful way possible,
and they're frozen into the Iron Throne forever,
and then it starts again with some other idiots.
Like the children of all the people that were murdered,
they grow up and it starts again.
And this universe never ends,
and everybody's just tortured to death forever.
Do you... I think you're being very generous to think that those three will live towards the end.
All three will live, okay, right, yeah. I mean, you to think that those three will live towards the end. All three will live.
Okay, right.
Yeah.
I mean, you did say that all die at once in a molten scenario.
But no.
You think only one will live or none of them?
I think maybe one or two will live.
Okay.
And I think also, like, Jon Snow's, spoiler alert, has come back from the dead.
So I think he's relatively safe for a short period of time.
Sure, right.
But then again, you'd never know with this show show yeah but i can't i mean yeah but i can't imagine denera's
dying yeah because who because with the starks there's three starks left so you can kill off
two of them you could really kill off three of them if you wanted to oh no there's four
there's wait there's there's john yes there's sansa yes there's ariel yes there's John. Yes. There's Sansa.
Yes.
There's Ariel.
Yes.
There's Rickon, who's missing.
No.
He's dead.
He got shot by the means of the universe.
And there's Bronn.
Bran.
Yep.
Yeah.
I'm saying all their names wrong.
Yeah.
See, that's...
Yeah.
So, yeah, there's a few Starks left.
Anyway.
But whatever.
I'm looking forward to it.
I'm jazzed, Mason.
I'm not as jazzed, but I'm more jazzed than I've been.
Okay.
Well, here's something that you're probably less jazzed for.
Oh, here we go.
A new Honda Jazz.
A Dark Universe.
I thought you were going to present me with a brand new car.
No.
That I'd be disappointed by.
The Dark Universe shared universe trailer.
Yeah, which wasn't anything, really.
Well, it's just a whole lot of existing footage, isn't it?
It was an assortment of clips from old Universal monster movies.
That Cinemassacre love.
All the classics.
We got the invisible man taking his bandages off
and he can't see his head.
That's a good effect, right?
It is actually a pretty good effect at the time.
We had the wolfman turning back into a regular man.
Not a good effect, because it's done in three really abrupt like cuts no good there's a mummy a dracula
an invisible man like you said a frankenstein monster but they've put a phantom of the opera
bride of frankenstein which is apparently the next movie after after the mummy what they're
doing right of frankenstein Frankenstein who's the bride?
I don't know probably Rachel Weisz
before a Frankenstein
they're doing
probably
probably Rachel Weisz
no it's probably
Helena Bonham Carter
she's already been
Bride of Frankenstein
yeah that's true
who's the new sexy
Helena Bonham Carter?
Eva
Eva Green
it's Eva Green
Eva Green
or the Bride of Frankenstein
we've called it
alright
we're putting money on this.
Yeah, she would be good.
And look, imagine her with a big slanted hair.
With a big lightning bolt straight through it.
Yeah, I know.
I could definitely see it.
Anyway, what I think I was leading up to there is that it's all these old clips from old
movies with some new dramatic music pasted over the top.
And who's it for?
For fans.
They're the original shared universe.
They kicked it off, man.
Or one of the first, anyway.
This has gone back to our roots of movies we never watched or enjoyed.
Right?
Yeah.
I do like watching, like I said before, like Cinemassacre,
James Rolfe, who's an angry video game nerd.
He loves these movies.
I like watching his recaps and reviews of these.
Because I'd never sit through any of those.
I was going to say, because all his reviews are like 10 minutes,
not the full 90 of these actual movies yeah exactly and and i know that
they're classic and whatever and they paved the way for whatever but unwatchable like i cannot
like by modern standards they're very slow and i do appreciate them for what they are but
yeah but i mean like we're going obviously we've seen the trailer for the new mummy and there's
plane crashes and there's non-stop action and there's all this CGI and magic and monsters.
Yeah.
And then we go.
And I barely care about that.
Yeah, and they're like, but coming up after this dark universe, here's all this, here's people staring at the camera and looking shocked.
What's the Phantom of the Opera doing?
He's like a weird creep murderer.
Yep.
Like he's following a girl around because he's in love with her.
Yeah.
What is he?
What's his skills?
Being in the shadows.
Oh, on the team?
Yeah.
Maybe he's an informant or something.
Okay, sure.
Yeah.
Maybe they need a woman murderer.
They might need a woman murderer.
Do you think there's a chance this could go League of Extraordinary Champions?
Yes.
Well, I think...
It's a similarist premise.
Yeah, but I think lessons have been learned.
It's modern day for one, so it's not...
Yeah.
I'm interested.
I am interested.
Me too.
I've been like, where's this going to go?
Yeah.
Johnny Depp's the invisible man.
If you can see less of him, the better, am I right?
Oh, mate.
That was plenty of work. If you can see less of him, the better, am I right? Oh, mate. Got it.
That was plenty of work.
Do you have a favourite?
A swamp monster?
Which is your favourite?
I do like Phantom of the Opera, but I don't know how it characterised.
I did not think of him as a universal monster.
That was Phantom of the Opera.
Did I miss...
There was a dude with a mask.
It looked like the Phantom of the Opera.
I might be wrong. I have no idea. Let's just say it isn't. Let's say it's the Phantom of the Opera, yeah. miss? There was a dude with a mask. It looked like the fan of the opera. I might be wrong.
I have no idea.
Let's just say it isn't.
Let's say it's the fan of the opera, yeah.
Okay, good.
Let's introduce him in.
Let's bring in the cats from Cats.
They can also be in the Dark Universe.
The cast of Rent.
Yep, that's right.
They just don't want to pay their rent.
Is that what Rent's about?
No, it's about...
It's about AIDS, isn't it?
Yeah, it's about AIDS and class struggle, yeah.
Okay, good.
Well, it's updated, isn't it, for the modern era?
Who else could we add in?
The cast of Grease.
Yep, Grease 2.
Yeah, flying car.
That's their power.
We bring that in.
And having a miscarriage.
Yep, sure.
Hairspray.
Yeah.
Oh, these are all classic.
They could fly using hairspray like My Secret Identity.
My Secret Identity, Jerry O'Connell, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, very good.
Okay, throughout the year.
We should move on from this because it's not very good,
but I'm going to add in different characters from musicals
every time I think of one.
Okay, excellent.
Happy to do it.
Good, good.
Spider-Man Homecoming has a new trailer, Mason.
It sure does.
I did a breakdown of it.
If you're wondering specifically how the bank robbers
give Spider-Man a bit of trouble in that sequence.
Yeah.
It'll tell you.
How?
Oh, it's with some sort of special weapon.
Gravity claw gun.
Your dog's just made an awful smell.
That's you.
The worst.
It's you.
No.
It's very unpleasant.
It's so unpleasant.
What is wrong with your dog?
Can you not smell that?
That is horrendous.
Take a deep breath.
Believe in yourself.
No, I'm not taking a dog.
No, you have to.
It's your dog.
It was better when you were out of continuity, dog,
when you didn't exist.
Ruined my life with your smells.
Anyway, the point is we see even more of that action sequence
where he fights the bank robbers in Spider-Man Homecoming.
Yes, there is.
I didn't actually do a real trailer breakdown.
I called a trailer breakdown, and then I rant venom for four minutes anyway yeah i saw that yeah
so did you actually you watched the trailer though yeah okay right so anyway spoiler alert for this
trailer if you're trying to avoid spoilers for this movie yeah all these trailers have all the
spoilers for this movie so don't listen to this isn't as bad as the last one no so if you skip
the last one i guess you'll be okay yeah i think this would yeah this is definitely works
better as a second trailer you know that i really like that trailer that they pulled for the first
spider-man movie the 9-11 one you know where it catches the robbers between the two towers yes
that tells you everything you need to know yeah and it doesn't need to be in the movie
spider-man hates terrorists yep webs webs he loves webs he loves it that's all you
need he loves civic planning two buildings right there love it big fan yeah so i don't know that's
it's it's yeah we see some more tech in the suit yeah probably too much yeah it's got a lot going
on he's got 500 variations and that's interesting because he's got the he's got the the web shooters
on his arms does that mean he can shoot webs from any point on his hands?
I think it's just what he does with his fingers.
I see.
There's too much information.
Yeah, that's right.
Could you remember 576 combinations of anything?
No.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
No, I definitely not.
Even CrossFit combinations?
Oh, that I could, yeah.
Because it's part of me now, mate.
Yeah, that's what I think.
It's in my culture.
It's in my DNA.
Yeah. What else do we see in the culture. It's in my DNA. Yeah.
What else do we see in the trailer?
We see more of the Vulture.
We see he's got a parachute in the suit.
Very good.
Which makes sense because obviously in Winter Soldier,
the Falcon has a parachute in his suit.
He does, too, yeah.
And then a lot of people after Civil War went, you know,
Rhodey's war machine suit crashes and people are like,
why doesn't it just have a parachute in it?
Yeah.
Tony Stark overconfidence, that's why.
But in this, I'm thinking he's like, well, that, you know,
that led to disaster.
But he designed this suit before the Rhodey accident.
Isn't this an upgraded version?
No, I think he gets it.
I think it's the one that he gives him.
Oh, then I don't know what I'm talking about.
You never do, Mason.
You never do.
But also, but it's not an armoured so that's true yeah you're right that's true
you know that's fun it is fun yeah but it does kind of because this this spider-man is kind of
that the stanley kirby spider-man from back in the day who was always making weird stuff with
his spider with his web so like he's the kind of guy who would make a spider-man like a web
parachute yeah that's true so that kind of takes who would make a Spider-Man, like a web parachute. Yeah, that's true.
So that kind of takes away one of his options.
But I think that's what it's going to be though.
Cause obviously we know from the trailers,
they take all, he takes the suit away.
He'll make his own.
So he'll go back to.
When he falls off that plane, when he's in the,
when he's in the sweat pants suit.
Exactly.
That we know is happening.
Cause it was in the trailer.
It's in the trailer.
What else?
I don't know.
I don't know.
Soot talks to him.
Soot talks to him. Is that Friday or is that somebody else? I couldn't. Friday's in the trailer, yeah. What else? I don't know. I don't know. Sue talks to him. Sue talks to him.
Is that Friday or is that somebody else?
I couldn't.
Friday's Irish.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah.
No, I'm genuinely looking forward to it.
Me too.
Yeah, just wish I knew less.
Also, we have another, I think we've seen it before, but we have Zendaya as that mysterious
classmate.
Who is that?
Oh, she's.
Is she Mary Jane or is she somebody else?
She's someone from the comics as well, like a prior girlfriend,
like from way, way back.
I can't remember who it is exactly.
Betty Brandt.
It's not Betty Brandt.
I can't remember who it is.
Okay, right.
But it's in one of my trailer breakdowns, not the latest one,
which is unrelated.
There's a lot of people who are like, this is clickbait.
Yeah, it is.
It's named a completely different thing to what the actual video is.
You just wanted an audience for your inevitable mental breakdown,
so you named it something that people would click on.
You're right.
Exactly.
Sad news, though, this week.
Oh, no.
Zack Snyder's daughter passed away.
Oh, she did.
That's true.
Yeah, suicide at the age of 20.
Autumn Summer was her name.
I didn't know this.
Well, obviously, I didn't know anything about Zack Snyder's family, really.
No.
But she did a lot of charity work.
She started a non-profit that shelters homeless pregnant women
and their children in 2014.
Wow.
Which, you know, goes to show she's not a terrible person, presumably.
None of them are terrible people.
No, I didn't think that they were.
I just mean in general.
I'm talking in the grand scheme of things.
Oh, I see.
I get it.
So she would have started that when she was like 17, 18.
Yeah, right.
I wasn't doing anything.
What was I doing when I was 17, 18?
You were giving the finger to cars.
I was.
You were probably sitting by the side of the road giving the finger to passing cars.
That seems like 17-year-old you.
I probably was.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Take that, society. Yeah. This also happened two months ago. Yeah. Yeah. Take that, society.
Yeah.
This also happened two months ago.
Yeah.
So it happened.
It's kept it under wraps.
Yeah, it kept it under wraps.
So the remaining directing duties of Justice League are going to Joss Whedon, right?
That's the idea, yeah.
And he decided he hasn't actually been working this entire time.
He took the time off.
And then when he kind of went to go back, he went, you know what?
I'm going to spend time with my family.
Like, this isn't something that I'm kind of ready to go back to.
And interestingly, and it was a pretty good move on their behalf,
Warner Brothers actually offered to push back Justice League
from the November release.
They said, when you're ready, come back and finish it.
And he said, no, you know what?
Let's keep the release date and let's just move everything along.
Right.
And because Joss Whedon is now in the DC Cinematic Universe.
Yes.
Sorry, the DC Extended Universe. Yes. Sorry, the DC Extended Universe.
Yes.
Well, he's doing Batgirl, obviously.
And he already had a bit of a role on this movie.
Yep.
So, like, I think he's doing some minor story credits.
But, yeah, like you said, he's stepping in
and he's going to do the reshoots,
which were always planned, as most movies do.
So, yeah, sad, sad news.
Ugh.
Yeah.
Well, now it's time to turn around some happy news.
What do you got?
Somebody else died, didn't they?
I just wanted to add,
apparently the directing for Joss Whedon is minimal
and it's going to adhere to the style and tone
that Zack Snyder had set
and they're not introducing new characters.
It's just some new scenes.
So I think the idea is that
there'll probably be some Wendham wendon-esque dialogue
and moments kind of added but i think the idea for him is to do it the way that zach snyder would
have i think i think that's his intention okay yeah because also it's very late in the game to
be coming in and reshaping the entire structure of the movie without it falling apart it's too
late josh to add the-note kick-ass female character
all of a sudden.
It's done.
It's done.
Unless it's Wonder Woman, Mason, which is getting glowing reviews.
Yeah, you're going to see it tomorrow night, right?
Tonight, by the time this comes out.
I get it.
This comes out.
The listeners know.
The listeners get time.
Time?
Do they?
They get time, yeah.
They get time.
They get time.
Giant time.
Yeah.
What do you think, though, about Joss Whedon taking over?
How do you think this is going to...
I think he's great.
I mean, it's best case scenario for a terrible situation.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah, look, I think he's great at what he does,
and it's going to be all right.
It's going to be the same as it was,
as it was initially going to be, probably.
Yeah, I would say so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because you can't be like, okay, let's make this scene wacky
and let's add some sweet banter over here or whatever.
I think...
Also, and I think especially now this news is broken
because people would be like...
People, I think, would very obviously be like,
did you add that scene?
Did you add that scene?
Right, yeah.
I think if he went to Whedon...
Yes.
...that it would be a very obvious tonal shift any time... Yeah....he added the scene. They'd be like, what? I think it would be a very obvious tonal shift any time he added the scene.
They'd be like, why you...
I think it would...
Yeah, I don't think the movie...
I don't think it would benefit from that weird kind of...
Yeah, right.
I think it would conflict those two kind of tones.
Also, I think this is going to be a little bit lighter anyway.
Yeah, it seems to be that way anyway.
But I think Joss Whedon's going to take a bigger role
in this universe in general.
Because I think DC went to him and said, he'd obviously kind of fed up with what happened in
age of ultron and they said what do you want to make yep and he chose batgirl right i don't think
they said make a batgirl i think do anything and he said i'll do right okay yeah i don't know i
just think we're probably going to be seeing a bit more of him as well uh in the in the future
also i invited to our bridge club so we're definitely going to see more of him as well in the future. Also, I invited him to our bridge club, so we're definitely going to see more of him.
Do I have to learn to play bridge?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
He's really good.
Do you bring your own bridge?
You bring a bridge.
Good.
That's right.
You pick a bridge.
Yep.
No, it's like a fantasy football team, except you have to draft various bridges throughout
the world.
Excellent.
Yeah.
I don't know many bridges.
Dimms Golden Gate.
Oh, man.
Yeah, that's right.
I'll take London Bridge. All right, cool. Fergie's got London Bridge. Fergie's also coming. I'll't know many bridges. Dibs Golden Gate. Oh, man. Yeah, that's right. I'll take London Bridge.
All right, cool.
Fergie's got London Bridge.
Fergie's also coming.
I'll take the Westgate Bridge.
Oh, no, that's one of the best bridges.
Is it?
It's always banked up.
Yeah.
This is a Melbourne-specific reference, everybody.
All right, some more DC news.
Okay, I'm ready.
Justice League Dark has lost its, well, it's not called that.
It's called Dark Universe, which is confusing because we're also getting a Dark Universe
universe.
Wait, what is it called?
Dark Universe?
Is it really?
Yeah.
Oh, man.
I think it is.
Doug Liman, who did...
I think he did...
That Tom Cruise keeps dying.
Stop him from being...
Age of Tomorrow.
...killed by squids or whatever.
Okay, that's a good one.
Yeah, it's a good one.
Yeah.
He's...
But he's not on it anymore.
No, he's dropped out of...
Terrific.
He's dropped out of that to focus on his upcoming sci-fi film,
Chaos Walking, which I'm not familiar with in any way.
So there you bloody go, mate.
What do you think of that?
It's the way it's going now, isn't it?
Yeah, that's right, exactly.
That's exactly it.
There were a few names that were up for it.
I don't think this movie is hard scheduled in any way.
No, that's true.
So I don't really think it's something to do.
You're going to have to see if justice league original recipe works before you go to justice league dark surely and you're gonna have to change the name of dark universe to
justice league dark because of the dark universe 100 sure that's true i'm pretty certain let me
don't look it up don't worry about it i'll look it up okay look it up let me just type in dark
universe nice nice that's the thing to look up so you've you've nailed that there Okay, look it up. Let me just type in Dark Universe movie. Nice, nice.
That's the thing to look up.
So you've nailed that there.
No, I haven't.
I haven't nailed it.
Oh, no.
Yeah, no, it is called Dark Universe.
Dark Universe or Justice League.
Dark, is it?
Yeah.
I like it.
It's going to be Constantine Zatanna, Dead Man's One Thing, Etrigan.
We've talked about this in a previous episode.
Yeah, yeah.
And Madame Xanadu.
Ooh. Allegedly, this is all kind of whatever. There you go. Nice. Etrigan and we've talked about this in a previous episode and Madame Xanadu oh
allegedly
this is all
okay
there you go
nice
do you like X-Men movies
no
I think the correct answer
is sometimes
oh yeah okay sometimes
the new Mutants movie
the new Mutants
it's going to be a horror movie
straight horror movie
oh
great
that's a fun twist
I think so
okay
that's
okay
cool
Fox is this because get out
was big and they're just like let's let's make an x-men movie but it's also get out probably yeah
uh but no i think that's great i think this is this fox this is what fox should be doing
that they've got they've got their deadpool they did their comedy one they did their logan they're
doing a horror movie this is great yeah okay this is all good stuff and and as we've said before the the superhero genre the superhero machine is so big
now that every movie can be its own subgenre so we've got we've had espionage movies we've had
western movies we've had i mean not successfully but we've had other types other movies we've had
all kinds so horror movie works great and that'll be fun to see you get a, because it's new mutants, it's the young
it's the young guys, throw them in a
throw them in a cabin in the woods
and there's a giant bear, there's a giant bear
and they've also got superpowers, that's a
fun twist, have we seen that before, I don't think we have
not to my knowledge, yeah, cool
I find that, I just find that really interesting, because
I wasn't super interested in this
because I don't want to see mutants just go what are my powers yeah right like oh no if i focus my mind
i can do this maybe you can focus your mind shut up shut up all of you but no that's great i love
it i mean it still might not be good as most things aren't but that's fine yeah right uh star
wars vanity fair photo shoot and spread
did you see all those photos
yes
anything stick out of note
Carrie Fisher
yeah
looks good
there's
two really good photos
of her in particular
the one with Mark Hamill
and the one with her daughter
yeah
now the idea was
apparently
she was
this is going to be like
Luke's movie
and the next movie
Carrie Fisher was like
this is
then episode 9
will be my movie or whatever and Kathleen Kennedy the head of Luke's movie. And the next movie, Carrie Fisher was like, then episode nine will be my movie or whatever.
And Kathleen Kennedy, the head of Luke's film,
said that was the idea.
So she was going to have a big role in nine,
which we've talked about before
and how they're going to work around that.
We don't know.
Maybe they'll recast.
Maybe she'll crash a Star Destroyer or whatever.
We don't know.
But the other thing that came out of that,
the mysterious Benicio del Toro.
That's right.
Did you see that image?
He's looking very suave and swarthy.
Correct.
Yes.
Now, his name is DJ.
I made a mistake there.
No, but that's apparently like a code name.
Oh, for disc jockey.
Yeah.
What do you think is, like people are saying it means dark Jedi.
What do you think he is?
Do you think he's just a grifter?
Like a mean Han Solo?
Yeah.
Why would they just don't, was this a leaked code name?
No, no, because they said that he is called DJ,
but I think the director or somebody said, close to it said,
oh, no, it's um oh no it's
it's
his name is a fart noise
it's hard
DJ means
it means something
yeah
yeah
he'd be a good Dark Jedi I feel
maybe he's like a former
apprentice of Luke
who went rogue
people are saying
is he Ezra Bridger
from
Star Wars Rebels
the age isn't quite right
because he'd be closer
to Luke's age
but um
yeah whatever okay then or he could be closer to Luke's age. But yeah.
Okay then.
Or he could be one of those because you saw the pictures of the casino planet.
Yes, that's true.
Perfect opportunity for Lando, by the way.
Yeah.
But I don't think he's in this movie.
But maybe he's going to be some kind of casino man.
Was he Captain Phasma without a helmet on?
Yeah.
I think she's going to be.
Because also they were saying that there was the implication in the last movie that Captain Phasma might not have been a person.
I never got that sense.
What do you mean?
Like a robot?
Like it would have been a robot or some variation,
but I didn't get that at all.
I never got that at all.
Maybe because we knew who was under the helmet.
There's one bumbling robot in the Star Wars universe
and at C-3PO they wouldn't make another bumbling robot,
or would they?
Or would they?
What if there are two bumbling robots and they fall in love?
What about that?
There's a silver one and a gold one.
That works.
Yeah.
That totally works.
Yeah, right?
Here's a question for you.
We've got the cover photo here.
It's got Kylo Ren.
He's got the lightsaber going.
Yeah.
Who does the lightsaber effect?
Vanity Fair.
No, they wouldn't.
Yes, they do.
They're very artisanal.
Okay, then.
Great. Yeah. But I was like, or do they're very they're very artisanal okay then yeah right yeah
but i'm like i was like or do they send it to lucas do they send the photo to lucasfilm when
they draw in the lightsaber yeah i say that i don't actually yeah right yeah do you and there's
also that's the way i think boring logistical questions you see there's a behind the scenes
footage where you see like him swinging a lightsaber it's just a photo shoot yes no i don't
think it is a stick do you think is it one of those plastic ones you're gonna came out in the sections
that never quite never it never quite collapses all the way down and they're real white at the
bottom yeah yeah good work everybody yeah but uh no i'm eight it's coming out isn't it star wars
star wars well the not the star wars celebration we had that already the disney expo is coming up
in july just after Comic-Con.
So we'll get some more information there.
Probably some Han Solo stuff and all of those things that we know and love.
Yes.
Speaking of things we know and love, Tom Holland will play young Dumbledore.
No.
Oh, wait, wait.
I know this.
He's going to play.
He'd be a good young Dumbledore.
He's going to play young.
A real young, yeah.
Because our friends over at Filthy Casuals cover this. He's going to be... He'd be a good young W. He's going to play young. A real young, yeah. Because our friends over at Filthy Casuals cover this.
He's going to be young Nathan Drake.
That's correct.
In the Uncharted movies.
That's right.
It's going to be a prequel to the Game of Sorts.
Okay.
And it takes reference from Uncharted 3 where Jake and Drake...
Jake and Drake.
Drake meets Sully.
Sean Levy's going to direct.
He did a bit of Stranger Things.
He did Nine Museum.
He did Real Steel.
Do you want to see an Uncharted prequel?
Well, do you think it'll break the curse of every single movie based on a video game being
profoundly terrible?
I think this is kind of a smart move to make from Sony because you're never going to win
with your Uncharted casting.
No one's going to be happy unless it's Nathan Fillion.
And he's too old, probably and he's too old he's too old yeah so everybody's going to be kind of unhappy of who the adult is hey speaking of nathan fillion side note what's what's going on with him being wonder
man oh that was a side thing prank put together james gunn was doing well in there was a scene
that was cut which it's it's in my i did the guardians deleted scenes video it's on my youtube channel but uh basically he that dog's gone mad uh what's your dog now remember
oh yeah good point yeah but uh no the he's an actor simon simon williams who's in the marvel
universe is an actor and an avenger yes but he appears in a whole lot of posters in the background
of a scene set on earth where he plays a Steve Jobs-esque character.
Yes, that's right.
Where he plays Tony Stark.
Tony Stark, right.
And there's a Conan the Barbarian knockoff.
So they made all these posters for these movies that exist within the Marvel Universe.
But where do we see them in Guardians 2 somewhere?
We don't.
Okay, right.
There were some set photos.
Were they going to be from the 80s or were they going to be modern?
I think they are.
No, there was a Simon Williams film festival.
So I think he's just from...
Oh, I see. Right. So I think it's just from... Oh, I see, right.
So I think it's from 80s forward.
Make that happen, guys.
Totally.
Totally.
Yeah.
But no, I like...
I don't mind Tom Holland as Nathan Drake.
If you played Uncharted 3, Mason, which you probably haven't.
I'm aware of it.
No, I think that's an interesting story they could follow.
So Uncharted 3
is it the one where
wait
is Uncharted 4
the one where
there's the flashback
and you play as the
junior version of him
3 does it as well
they both do it
but no he looks
he looks pretty
pretty close
and I think this is
yeah and I think
this is a good kind of way
to
because you could
potentially
if this is good
you could keep him
for 10 years
I don't know I don't think he's going to grow into adult nathan drake because he's like
he's broad that guy yeah he's a broad side of a barn that guy and tom holland's like 19 which
means he'll probably look roughly like that forever like a good muscle on but that's kind
of what he'll exactly what he'll look like yeah which is fine he's not bad looking bloke but they
screen test him by like pushing him off a ledge and having him go
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Presumably.
Yes.
Yeah.
And also that guy can do
a real life somersault.
So that's pretty good, isn't it?
No, I think this is,
it's interesting.
I don't, I don't,
I don't hate it.
And there hasn't been
weird outrage from it.
That's true.
Prequels are generally no good.
Hey, speaking of weird outrage
and Wonder Man.
Yes, man.
Why couldn't there, why isn't there a Wonder Man?
We weren't even going to bring this up, but I figure let's hammer an awkward segue in.
Sure.
So the Alamo Drafthouse in the United States of America decided to run, as often they do
with various, as movie theaters all over the world do.
Yeah.
They're like, let's run a girls' night.
Yeah.
Let's just watch, let's have Wonder Woman.
If you're a woman, you want to say Wonder Woman. You can Wonder Woman can wonder woman you can wonder woman it up and people are mad i went to the old girl screening of ghostbusters here yeah great
fantastic yeah it was fantastic but uh people are so mad i don't know why i i just look i used to
be a teacher right not very long ago i probably gonna say not a very good teacher not a very good
teacher and not very long ago but there is absolute were going to say not a very good teacher. No, not a very good teacher and not very long ago.
But there is absolute value, I think, in education and in society.
Men and women are allowed to do things separately.
There's nothing wrong with that.
And I know sexuality and gender is a spectrum. All right, no sexuality and gender are all right as well.
No, I'm just saying that there is nothing wrong with doing a guy's thing
and a girl's thing and then also something with both. It's not a big deal. And if it was a men's thing and a girl's thing. And then also something with both.
Yeah.
It's not a big deal.
And if it was a men's only screening,
that's also not a big deal.
Yeah.
Who gives a shit about any of this?
That's the thing.
Like there,
there are people who are unironically comparing this,
like I'm a man and I can't buy a ticket to this one women's only screening
to like somebody did it with that.
You know,
there's that photo of there's like some African American people at a lunch
counter in like the fifties and like people are pouring like milk on their head or what like they're occupying the
lunch counter so they because they want basic civil rights yeah and there are people who are
like it's the same as i can't buy a ticket to this women's only screening of wonder woman but also
like because i look i'm like i wonder what else is happening first of all you can buy a session
to any other screening of wonder woman in america want. Secondly, there are other screenings of Wonder Woman
running concurrently in that cinema.
Yeah, that's right.
So you can just buy one.
So in order to be discriminated against,
you can't buy a ticket to this one session.
You would have to be on day release from prison
and you can only go on this specific day at this specific time.
But also, you are allergic to something you're
allergic to the dust mites in all the other cinemas so you can only go to that one and
they're not letting you that's a very real possibility i think it is i just can't rule
it out this is just a whole lot of nothing yeah anyway yeah everybody just gets so upset about
everything it's just i think they just wanted to be mad like with Ghostbusters, but there's no way to do it because you can't be like,
no, Wonder Woman used to be a man in the comics
and they changed it and I'm upset about it.
They're like, how can we work with this somehow?
Yeah, look, but I think really most people do not care about this.
Absolutely.
Because it affects literally nobody.
Anyway, whatever.
I'm sick of this shit.
I'm sick of it, Mason.
I'm sick of the extreme right. I'm sick of the extreme right i'm sick
of the extreme left i just think i think they're the loudest people and they're the worst people
why can't everybody just shut up good point including us no only podcasters are allowed to
speak yeah i know it's that's a ridiculous thing to say when this is this is like two hours of just us just banging on about things that we like
or dislike
speaking of
the Terminator
Arnold Schwarzenegger says
it is back
it is moving forward
did he just want to say
his catchphrase
I think he did
I think they asked him
yeah they said
do you think I'll be back
and he went
what do you mean
what do you mean you
do you mean you the journalist
do you mean you'll be back
when you interview me later
for this movie?
Yeah, so they cut all that out.
He's very nice about that, it seems.
He'll say, he always...
You get him to say a thing, he'll do it.
But he always find a way to, like, no matter what,
because whenever anybody's interviewing him,
they just want him to say, I'll be back, right?
Or get to the chopper or whatever.
Yeah, and they're too excited.
And so they say say but he will
always find a way to like politely say i'll be back yeah like what a sport i said that james
cameron's got some good ideas on how to continue the franchise and i will be in the movie so tim
miller's doing it to deadpool this is a re-re-re-reboot as far as i can tell but it also
don't care what a continuation want a sequel to 5
want it to make no sense
but also
it can be a continuation
yeah that's true
you can all link them in
through time travel anyway
because you know
Wild West Terminator
1 and 2 don't even line up
that's true
yeah well exactly
I'd love to see a Wild West Terminator
or a Pirate Terminator
we've talked about this
there's a video on my channel
where we talk about it
that's right
but I'm interested to see what they do.
But I don't know.
Why?
Amish Terminator.
Yes.
So it's like Witness, but there's a Terminator.
Yeah, it's Witness, but there's a Terminator.
Okay, good.
Yeah.
So what do you think about him coming back, though?
Terminator goes Hawaii.
I bless you.
Thank you.
What do you think about Terminator going Hawaii?
Cool with that? I think that'd be great. Do you. What do you think about Terminator going Hawaii? You cool with that?
I think that'd be great.
Do you reckon they could swim?
Uh, yes.
They're powerful enough to propel themselves.
Do you reckon their chest cavities may be filled with air?
Yeah, I think so, yeah.
Maybe like vents open up?
Oh, no, they don't open up.
Well, maybe they just like rip their chest open.
We've seen him do that before, haven't we?
Yeah, I think probably that happens.
Okay, you're right.
That'd be fun and grisly.
I like it. Yeah, it would be be he's got to go tropical now yes too
i think this is going to be like an r-rated kind of yeah i think they're going to go right back and
i don't know if it is if it is a reboot why is there arnold unless they're just like the only
ones that count a one and two because they're james cameron ones who knows yeah we'll find out
we sure will 20 21 i don't know 20 29 when it's out oh very good Who knows? Yeah. We'll find out in 2021.
I don't know.
2029.
I don't know when it's out.
Oh, very good.
FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret.
The other, a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.
Okay.
Pirates of the Caribbean.
Oh, we're going to get to it.
We're going to talk about this.
We saw it.
Yeah, we did.
We saw it at a half full media screening. Yeah. Where they didn't even, normally they do like, thanks for to get to it. We've got to talk about this. We saw it. Yeah, we did. We saw it at a half full media screening.
Yeah.
Where they didn't even, normally they do like, thanks for coming out to whatever.
But they just started it.
Yeah.
There was a guy with a microphone ready to go, but they just, just play it.
That's true, yeah.
Let's just go.
We sound tested as we were coming in, but then he didn't say anything.
You're right.
I didn't even think of that.
Yeah.
So Pirates of the Caribbean, Dead Men, they tell a lot of tales.
They don't tell any tales, do they? No tales. So they do in this one, it seems. He they tell a lot of tales they don't tell any tales
do they
no tales
they do in this one
it seems
he does tell a bit of a tale
he does a bit of a bloody tale
we thought because
who cares
and most people
seem to not like this
that we're just going to do
all spoilers
also there's not really
anything to spoil in this film
they've got to get a thing
and break the curse
have you seen a Pirates movie
it's the same
yeah
and somewhat worse
or the same, depending on
what you... Yeah.
I reckon if I were like 9 to
12, I would have liked this film. Yeah, but...
But I'm not. I'm an adult man.
I'm at least
three times that age, if not more
times that age.
So I... And also you haven't...
I'm three to four times that age!
But you haven't seen all the other ones either.
I reckon I've seen, I think I've seen the first three.
Okay.
Okay.
There you go.
Maybe I didn't say the last one.
Yeah.
I think the last one is better than the second two.
What happened in the last one?
It's just a Johnny Depp runabout.
But I think it's better because two and three are really complicated.
Who does he fight in the last one?
Blackbeard. I haven't seen that one. Yeah. Last one I saw was when he fought Davy Jones, I think it's better because 2 and 3 are really complicated in real life Blackbeard
I haven't seen that one
last one I saw
was when he fought
Davy Jones I think
I like Davy Jones
2 and 3
I like Davy Jones
as a villain
he's a marvel
of special effects
but those movies
are no good
what do you think
of the effects
in this one though
we had some
there's some underwater hair
there's some underwater hair
non-stop underwater hair
big ships
big ships
there's people with holes
missing in their faces.
But it's the same.
Like, we had that in one.
Yeah.
Like, one was, well, they're all, there's a cursed crew
and they're all after Jack Sparrow.
All of these movies are that.
Yeah, that's true.
Maybe four.
I don't remember that one.
Surely these movies are for people,
they're not for people who are continuing to watch the saga.
I mean, maybe there's a small amount for people watching,
but aren't they just for people, aren't they just for like children
and tweens who then age up out of the franchise after like one or two
and then it's the next group of children and tweens?
Look, as a father, we're going to start your fame.
Before we do, what do you think the plot was?
I'm going to turn it on you.
I completely forgot that.
As a father, what age would you take your kid to the...
I wouldn't.
I wouldn't because it's just not that good.
I don't even think it's terrible.
I just think...
I don't think a kid wants to see this.
It's school holidays.
You've got to take your kid to something.
I'd take him to Boss Baby.
Really?
Over this.
Because I haven't seen Boss Baby.
Okay.
If you put him in front of me, I would say Boss Baby
because Alec Baldwin's the voice of the Boss Baby.
I don't think Boss Baby would be any good at all.
Surely it can't be good.
But I've seen so many of these.
And do you know this one is the shortest of the Pirates movies?
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah, it seemed brisk.
Yeah, well, because I looked at the runtime before it started
and it said two hours 33.
It wasn't anywhere near that.
It was not that, yeah.
So that must have been wrong.
But also, okay, what do you think the plot is?
Hang on.
James is banging his head against the back wall.
I don't even hate it.
I just don't want to talk about this.
Okay, so Johnny Depp's Captain Jack Sparrow
is on the run from everybody again.
He's not doing so well because he's terrible at being a pirate.
But also Orlando Bloom's son wants to get him, release him from the curse.
Spoiler alert.
Of what happened in the last, second to last movie?
Yes.
Two movies ago.
He replaced Davy Jones as the fairies, the dead.
That's right.
To the afterlife.
Who's going to do it now?
Spoiler alert.
Good question, Mason.
Yeah, right.
That was a question I was going to add for later. Okay, right. We'll do it later. Yeah. We can do it now? Good question, Mason. That was a question I was going to add for later.
Okay, right.
We'll do it later.
We can do it now.
I mean, we're in spoilers.
It doesn't matter.
You know what's weird, though?
In Europe, this movie is called Salazar's Revenge.
I know it, at least in England and a bunch of other places.
But don't you think it's weird?
Because, first of all, when this started, I was like,
oh, these are fun.
I remember this. Yes. Because it's like a big pirate party adventure and they go in there's there's ghosts and whatever
and this is like the first five minutes yes and then it kind of just it's just whatever from then
on but there's a bit where it's like why don't you tell because he goes tell captain jack that
i'm bloody coming for him javier but yeah and then something like why don't you tell me he goes
because dead men tell no tales and then it cuts to dead men tell no tales.
But in the theaters in Europe, it would just cut to Salazar's Revenge.
So I'd imagine that would be a real weird moment.
Maybe they re-dub it.
Maybe they got Javier Bardem to say in Spanish.
Tell him to Salazar's Revenge.
Tell him I'm going to get my Salazar's Revenge.
And he points to himself.
His hair flaps menacingly in the water.
Big hole in the side of his head.
He's Javier Bardem's returning to the role that made him famous.
Guy who's got something wrong with his face.
Yeah, that's right.
Like from Skyfall.
Yeah.
So I found the New York Times has a review by famous reviewer A.O. Scott,
who when he drags a movie, he really drags a movie.
Nice.
It opens with,
This review will be short and dismissive.
So that's a good start.
Pirates of the Caribbean is, by contrast, long and punishing.
Its pleasures are so meagre,
its delight in its own invention so forced and false
that it becomes almost the perfect opposite of entertainment.
Since you exchange money for fun, fun is surely what you must have purchased,
and you may cling to that idea in the face of contrary evidence.
But trust me on this, this movie would be a rip-off even if someone paid you to see it.
It's not that bad, is it?
No, I don't know.
I think he's just having fun with it.
Then he's like, you know, the early movies were not bad.
But then he's like, Mr. Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow goes through the motions like a washed-up rock star reprising his greatest hits in a half-empty auditorium.
The image is so dark and muddy that you can't see what's going on well enough to know why you don't care.
I agree with that.
We saw it in 3D, which is bad generally.
I don't remember.
It darkens the whole situation, but it is dark and muddy.
Yeah, well, there's a bit where Captain Jack
is literally dark and muddy.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You can't,
the plot twist Easter eggs
and surprises are either obvious or labored.
You can't spoil something
that's already thoroughly rotten.
Jesus.
Now then you get a reminder
of why you may have enjoyed the earlier movies.
I agree with this.
There's a couple of nifty, rude,
Goldbergian action sequences. Yeah, but they're not as good. The other with the guillotine. I like the Bank Vault. I agree with this. There's a couple of nifty, rude, Goldbergian action sequences.
Yeah, but they're not as good.
The other with the guillotine.
I like the Bank Vault.
The Bank Vault one was good.
They fast and furious that.
That's what they did in Fast Five.
Okay, right.
Gotcha, yeah.
Yeah, and I didn't mind that sequence.
Yeah.
You picked that he was in the safe,
that he was asleep in the safe.
I did, yeah.
That's true.
Yeah, you turned him in and said,
I bet he's asleep.
Why is the town gathering around
to look into a safe?
I guess that's entertainment, isn't it? That's entertainment back then. Just looking into a safe but i guess that's entertainment that's entertainment somebody built a safe yeah exactly yeah yeah great yeah yeah what
did you think of oh do you want more more review uh well it's gonna say how it how did johnny depp
convince the bank manager's wife to sleep with him in the safe so anyway it's not the point um
anyway okay here's the last bit uh you are invited to sit through every last name in the
lengthy end credits for a teasing extra scene of a couple of sleep on linen sheets a reminder how
you might have better spent the time okay i left because there was a post-credit scene and i just
went i'm going oh yeah but you stayed is that what it is there's literally nothing so basically
it's orlando bloom and kira knightley they're in their, and Orlando Bloom's like, I'm back on dry land,
and I'm enjoying my sleep. And then you see the shadow of Davy Jones coming to the room,
and he's all squelchy, and the big crab claw arm comes up,
and he's like, whoa, and he wakes up, and there's nobody there
because he was just dreaming.
But then under the bed, there's like some beads or something.
Pearls?
Pearls maybe that represent Davy Jones or something.
I don't know.
I didn't know what didn't i didn't
know what it was i squinted and i'm like are they pearls or is it necklace somebody's but i don't
know what it is but it's it was a dream ball was it it was well was it no it was but there was
something under the bed it would have had to have been a dream i don't know unless no we'll get to
it anyway what happened to davy jones did a big crab eat him? I don't know.
You mean after, when he died?
In three, yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know.
No, I reckon he just, based on this,
I imagine he just would have shook his crab claw and sworn revenge, right?
No, I think he died.
Oh, okay, right.
No, because they had his heart, then they put his heart in Orlando Bloom,
and Orlando Bloom became the new Davy Jones,
which is why he's got all the coral on his face.
Yeah. It's good to see Orlando Bloom back, isn't it?
No.
Who cares?
Yeah, right.
What do you think of the new two?
The new Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley?
They're as good as Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom were.
I think they're totally fine.
She's in Skins.
Ah, yep, she is.
That's true.
Him I don't know from anything,
but he looks enough like Orlando Bloom used to look where,
or sort of still looks now that it's absolutely fine.
I feel like I should watch the first one, but I just can't.
I cannot go back and watch another one of these.
No, the length will really get you, I feel.
I remember the first one.
I remember enjoying the first one and going,
this is kind of dragging a bit.
Right.
If I had to watch it again, I'd be like, oh, no.
Okay, so Johnny Depp is back as Captain Jack's Barry.
Yes, he is.
He's 53
years old yep he's got the eye makeup he's still staggering about uh yeah he's i remember though
from the previous movies and i might be wrong he was he had some abilities and he wasn't just
he's what he did wasn't based on pure luck and chance and he was a good sword fighter in the
first one and he happened to like in this he just happens to not get shot or happen to not get his guillotined it's by pure chance
but in the in the previous ones he seemed to he'd plan things out like he'd steal a ship and
you know and he'd do a fake out and then he'd shoot the the mast off the other one and then
yeah but there was none of that it was just he just bumbled his way through it, but with no skill.
Yeah, that's the thing.
Because it's, I thought that as well.
And it's very sad because it's, like, if you met a real person like that, you'd be like, oh, it's all the alcohol.
Yeah.
Like, they're permanently drunk now and it's quite sad.
Yeah.
But that's not addressed in the film.
No.
He's just had a skill decline and everybody's like, oh, captain jack but i think if i think he looks like he wants to die
and i don't know whether that's intentional or not see that's the thing i don't think it is
but that's a narrative we've built and it makes perfect sense and if they'd addressed it yeah
it might have been interesting like a burnt out captain jack's yeah yeah but he's still kind of
up to the same shit,
even though he's just not very good.
Also, Paul McCartney's in this for no reason.
I just remembered.
What do you think?
Paul McCartney's one of his other uncles.
Yeah, well, his dad is... His dad is Keith Richards.
Keith Richards is...
So presumably this only came about because Paul McCartney was like,
well, if one of the Rolling Stones can be in a Pirates movie,
one of the Beatles can be in a Pirates...
Or one member of Wings can be in a Pirates movie, one of the Beatles can be in a Pirates movie, or one member of Wings can be in a Pirates movie.
Yeah, exactly.
What did you think of him?
Yeah, fine.
I thought he did okay.
I'm like, he's a slightly better actor than I thought he was.
But why is he in it, though?
All good questions.
And he's also, he's like the fresh-faced, clean-cut version.
He looks really good, doesn't he, considering his age?
Yeah.
But Johnny Depp's it's just not
he looks better than johnny it doesn't but it's just not a good or interesting role anymore yeah
i feel there's nothing cutting edge about it yeah it's it's incredibly unfunny this movie was it's
staggeringly zero joke there were there were there were what are technically jokes in this
movie and zero jokes land in this movie.
There was, you could hear the silence in the cinema when a joke didn't land because they've left space
in the movie for people to laugh, but nobody does
and nobody did in the cinema.
So there was just deafening silence.
It was actually kind of amazing.
At every point.
And again, they're jokes because they're not jokes that like 9 to 12-year-olds would get probably.
But also they're not jokes.
There's a prostitute joke.
Yeah.
There's a testicles joke.
Yeah.
So there's jokes that I guess are for parents taking their kids to the movie.
Not me.
But they're not jokes that people who like jokes would enjoy.
I think they're jokes for people who are just exhausted, right?
And they're like, oh, that was an attempt at a joke.
I'm exhausted.
My life is constantly exhausted.
But you prefer better jokes.
I prefer better jokes or no jokes.
Yeah.
Yeah, there's this callback to the new Keira Knightley is a horologist.
Yeah.
And so there's a joke.
There's a confusion.
The pirates are confused, like a horologist whore joke.
That's the joke.
It's never explicitly said.
It's a running joke also.
Yeah, but it's never funny.
And there's also a witch joke where everyone thinks she's a witch
because she knows math, and that goes on and on.
Yeah.
Why do they think she's a witch? There's a and that goes on and on and yeah why do they
think she's a witch there's a there's a literal witch in this movie as well yeah and nobody gives
a shit that's true there's a universe it's this is a universe in which real witches exist who can
do real magic and they're like she knows how to navigate by the stars like we do she must be a
witch and i guess look and i did the i guess the idea is obviously there's a
double standard yeah no i understand that but it's weird because david wenham who's the the british
guy this david wenham is in this we've got some david wenhaming about who i love he's great we
forgot about we didn't talk about the valerian trailer oh no i've got a question in the okay
right right edit this out it's gone forget about it everybody I'll just I'll just leave a
deafening silence
if you could yeah
to one of the movie
oh you know what if you could
what if you could do
because I like to think
that I make some jokes
on this podcast
and that's very generous
on my behalf
but if you could edit in
like
three or four seconds
of deafening silence
after a few of them
I feel that would be good
I would enjoy that
just the sound of escaping air like after a few of them. I feel that would be good. I would enjoy that.
Just the sound of escaping air, like...
Prior to this is what I'm saying.
So you get it.
So you get it.
Once we get to this point, you're like,
oh, I get it.
I get the silence now.
Do you think that would be weird?
Not for me.
I don't have to listen back to it.
Do what you want.
I'll do it, yeah.
I'll listen to it.
I'll see if I can make it work.
So there's a literal-
I'll leave this bit in so I don't seem like an idiot.
Yeah, just-
That'd be amazing.
There's a bit where-
So David Wenham thinks that new kira knightley is a witch
and but then he goes to a literal witch who he's okay with yeah he hasn't he hasn't executed her
or anything he's just keeping her around and then you drink it you go to and you drink a weird goo
and you can see the future what does she do again she tells them where they are is that right she
tells them they're going for Poseidon's whatever.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because they need to get- That's the plot of this.
They need to get Poseidon's trident.
To rule the seas.
No, to break all the curses of the ocean.
Yeah, right.
But if you also get Poseidon's trident, you have ultimate power of the ocean.
By that, I mean you can point it at people and like a-
Swing them about.
Like a little water tornado comes out.
Pretty good, isn't it?
It's great.
So good.
It's real good.
Yeah, like you mentioned earlier,
if the Trident of Poseidon breaks all the curses of the ocean,
including the curse that means that Orlando Bloom doesn't have to ferry the dead
and wear coral on his face.
Yep.
Yeah, what happens to the dead?
Which ones?
The people who die.
Do they get ferried to the afterlife or do ones? The people who die.
Do they get ferried to the afterlife?
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Yeah, or do they just never... Maybe that's what the next movie is about.
Nobody can go to the afterlife.
So Davy Jones is back?
Maybe.
Is that why he's back?
No, I was just going to say...
Is that why he's delivering pearls?
No, I'm just going to say
regular people can't die anymore.
So they're just horrific zombies
who got gonorrhea or whatever.
Even if this makes a billion dollars, which there's a possibility,
internationally it'll probably do well,
especially with Salazar's Revenge as the title.
That's right.
But do you think they will make another one of these?
Good question.
I don't know.
Surely not.
Surely this is it.
This was an opportunity to do something new and fresh.
Who was Davy Jones?
What was the actor?
Bill Nighy.
He's good.
I was going to say, would they make...
Would they...
Because in this...
Spoiler alert.
In this spoiler section, the entire thing is a spoiler section.
Yeah.
At the end, when they break the trident, which ends all the curses, presumably Davy Jones
and all his crew
are returned to normal.
But he's dead.
Yeah.
But maybe every part of that curse is maybe he just, I don't know.
Yeah.
So would you have Bill Nighy?
Then why is he back as a crab man?
Because that was the dream.
What I'm saying is potentially the curse was broken,
so Orlando bloom escapes from
under the wall he doesn't drown for some reason even though he was he was very deep underwater
when the curse was broken he became human again and he was probably like snacking on some kelp
underwater because he doesn't need to breathe he was probably in his captain's quarters eating his
kelp he had a big lung full of water he was cracking open a barnacle to eat and then you
know big lung full of water because he doesn cracking open a barnacle to eat. And then, you know, a big lung full of water.
Because he doesn't, why would you bother holding your breath
when you're underwater anymore?
And then all of a sudden he turns human again.
He doesn't immediately drown for some reason.
He makes it back up to the surface.
He goes and he meets Keira Knightley.
What I'm saying is I think that potentially Davy Jones turned human again
and he showed up at Orlando Bloom's house
and snuck the pearls under the thing to be like
I'm back why wouldn't he just slit his throat I don't know are they even I don't even know if
they're enemies anymore really it's a good question I don't I don't know I yeah I think
this is they're building on nostalgia no yeah I guess so but they're they're working on the x-men
movie continuity which is if you think back further than the last movie,
none of it makes sense.
So just don't think about it.
And do a horror movie.
So just go, Davy Jones, he looked like a weird monster with a crab hand.
He's a bad guy.
Maybe they made amends in the last one.
I don't know.
It doesn't matter.
I feel like they sort of did.
I don't remember.
Because he was in love with...
Maybe Davy Jones has a son.
Or a daughter.
Men can have daughters too.
Oh, that's right.
It turns out that Geoffrey Rush's daughter is the...
Not Keira Knightley.
Not Keira Knightley.
Okay.
I got a question about that actually.
It's from Joel Allen.
Just on pirates, it was okay.
But James, how did you feel about the reveal of Barbossa?
You know, as a father, love the show.
Yes.
I thought it was really shoehorned in.
Yeah.
And pointless.
And it didn't
add anything to the narrative yeah what did you think i agree with those things yeah i like i
think jeffrey rush is great in these every movie that he's in of these he's fantastic and this is
no exception yeah but that is completely unnecessary it did lead to an unnecessary
sacrifice which is always good yeah love a bit of that well we talked about this directly after the movie ended or maybe during but at the end of it at the end so when they they they get the ruby from the in the diary
and the ruby and they go to the secret island where you from the map with them this island is
the stars the island is the stars and they put the ruby on the thing and it cracks open the earth
and magic causes the seas to part and then you can
walk down you can walk down to the bottom of the ocean and find the trident of poseidon right but
and you've got walls of water on either side yeah it's a real it's a real moses situation exactly
and salazar's men cannot go on dry land no so they can only menace them from inside these walls of water.
Yeah.
But then they break the trident and all the curses are lifted.
So these men who are human again can go,
they can go through the walls of water and appear on the dry land.
But then because the curse,
all the magic of the world has been broken by the trident being broken,
the walls start to collapse again. Like the walls of water start to collapse again.
So they're like, we've got to bring down the anchor.
We've got to get on the anchor and escape.
That ship would tip right into that.
Oh, absolutely.
So they get an anchor on one side of it.
So they're like, we've got to bring down the anchor.
We'll get on the anchor.
We'll escape before the walls of water collapse.
But I'm like, Salazar's men just went out of the walls of water.
Yeah.
Just go back into the walls of water.
Stick your head out and just swim up.
Yeah.
Then you're in the ocean.
Yeah.
And then you can just swim up.
With your head out.
With your head out.
It'd be fine.
You can breathe.
And you can swim.
And you can swim.
But if you're about to get crushed by the walls of water,
just bring your head back in.
I completely agree.
Makes no sense.
But I guess that also explains why Orlando Bloom was able to get
out because the water
took a long time to
kind of collapse in.
They introduced a
weird element to the
Salazar dead man curse
just before that final
scene.
Oh, that he can
possess people.
That he can possess
people.
He goes, oh, I'm just
going to possess
Orlando Bloom's son.
And they're like, but
you'll get trapped in
there forever.
But he's like, not
if I get the trident.
Yeah.
Also, if you can possess somebody, but you get trapped as them forever, good.
Yeah.
That means you can possess somebody and just go and live your life.
Just wait.
Yeah, exactly.
Just wait for any of the ships that you destroyed.
The hundreds of ships.
And just possess all the crew and then live your life on land.
Yeah.
What were you thinking?
And then you wouldn't look like Salazar.
And then you could just do your revenge on everybody.
They wouldn't even know.
Good point.
This movie's dumb.
Yeah, it is.
There's also a wedding in this.
Oh, that's right.
That goes for too long.
Yeah.
So they get marooned on an island
yeah everybody knows who captain jack is and one of the guys there forces captain jack to to marry
marry his sister he's real ugly sister so he's and they have to kiss but it's gross that's funny
and he's like i'm a bed gross people don love. They certainly don't. And it's that recurring joke about him being a bedwetter
because he yells it out then as well.
Yeah.
No good.
Why is that sequence in it?
The only thing I thought was relatively interesting in this
in terms of doing something new, there were some undead sharks.
That's right, yeah.
That's fine.
And they keep them as like torpedoes, which is kind of funny.
I like that. Ready to kind of funny I like that
Ready to bloody go
I like that
Okay here's a question for you
I'm ready
Did you think that
Young Johnny Depp
Depp looked terrific
But then at the end
He looked real terrible
That's a good question
We actually got a
We got a letter about that
Oh did we
I'll find the letter
Okay so for those who don't know
They have the flashback sequence
In this movie
If you don't know Why you're listening to this,
I mean, you can.
I mean, this is a good recap.
This is the best, the very best recap of this film
if you have no intention of seeing it.
So it's a good point, actually.
You're in good hands.
Yeah.
But basically, it flashes back to Salazar,
who was a bad bloke because he was killing all the pirates,
which I think makes him a good bloke.
But hey, what am I to say? Yeah, but what's the morality in this universe you know good point this
is a this is a universe where pirates are cool you know what i mean yeah but really they murder
and rape their way across the sea yeah but they're cool yeah i saw somebody tweeted it was a page
from i think it was a disney i don't know if it's a pirate pirates the caribbean was a kid's book
about pirates yeah and there were all these kids as pirates and it said,
remember a good pirate never takes something that doesn't belong to them.
That is literally. That's literally the opposite of what they do, right?
Yeah.
What would they do then if they didn't do that?
I don't know.
Is it just the rapes?
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
Yep.
Oh, God.
Just that and sailing.
But also all the pirates in this universe are bad
except Captain Jack
who's kind of morally
ambiguous but mostly good
like they're all terrible
but he ruins a lot of lives
that's the thing
he ruins so many lives
like he ruined that
marriage
of the bank manager
and the bank manager's wife
presumably
I mean they were still
together afterwards
when they went to his hanging
yeah were they though
but potentially I reckon
the bank manager was like
listen we'll just get
through this hanging
and look we'll just we'll have look, we'll have a chat about it
and we'll have a hanging
and then I think things will be okay.
But if he escapes, you are on thin ice.
You're dead.
Yeah, right?
But then he escaped, so.
Yeah, boy, did he.
Yeah.
This is from Will on the Gmail,
weeklyplanetpod at gmail.com.
Can the Pirates film crew please hire
the Guardian de-aging department
to redo the young Captain Jack Sparrow?
It was not good, mate.
I feel like it was initially good, and then towards the end,
when he was talking, it was not good.
Yeah, I think the talking through it.
Yeah.
Like, if he sounded a little younger, but that was just his regular cap.
I mean, it was less, ugh.
Yeah.
So that was Johnny Depp, and they de-aged him.
Yes.
Okay, that wasn't another actor.
No.
I thought on first appearance of that character, I'm like, oh, that's a young actor.
And they've given him the raccoon eyes.
Yeah.
I guess you probably could.
Yeah.
Yeah, you'd probably get away with that.
Are we never going to get someone cast young anymore, except for Nathan Drake?
Nathan Drake, right.
Is everyone just getting de-aged forever?
Maybe.
Yeah, that's fine.
I'll let go of it.
But no, it looked real wonky to me.
And then it's like, and this is how Captain Jack got his hat.
This is how Captain Jack got his sword.
This is how Captain Jack got his compass.
Who fucking cares?
Yeah, true.
Who cares about any of this?
I hate this guy also.
I don't want to know anything about him.
You know what?
The less I know about this guy, the better.
When you say who cares, I disagree.
But when you see like a, not a Jack Sparrow, you see a Keith Richards,
they've always got the rings and they've got the necklace
and they've got the shirt and the leather jacket
and all that sort of stuff.
I'm intrigued by these people because I'm like,
what's the story behind that?
What's the story behind that?
I don't think any of that means anything.
I think it's all posing.
No, I reckon for a lot of people it is.
I think people in the wake of a Keith Richards.
I reckon Keith Richards, it's like,
yeah, I got this jacket from a bar fight.
I beat up a guy.
That's probably true.
So I like the idea of those characters.
I was in Cuba and this guy gave me a ring
and all this sort of stuff.
But I hate the idea that he just,
he defeated a bunch of guys in like captain
jacksburg beat it defeated a guy in one battle and they gave him all his stuff like oh here's
all you and he's just been wearing the same hat and rings and sword and whatever for 20 years or
whatever you know what i mean i completely agree like it would make sense if you acquired them for
through a lifetime of pirating you want a movie for each item yeah i want a movie for each item. Yeah, I want a movie for each item.
But the idea that he just sort of went to...
It's like he went to Kmart and he just bought a series of...
You know what I mean?
Yeah, he walked down the aisle with one of those shallow shopping carts.
Here's some rings and here's some dreadlock rings.
I feel like when you see those people in real life,
it's too much of everything.
It's too many hats or bandanas or right the glasses or whatever and and tattoos and everything you're just a boring person you're just
a boring person i reckon there's some i reckon you can very readily tell who's a poser yes well
that is true yeah absolutely we are we are we have not lived no. But we wear so many rings.
That's true.
Do you wear any rings?
No, what if we were ring guys?
I've got one.
Yeah, we get it.
You've got one.
I'm a married man, Mason.
There's nothing wrong with that.
This is my grandfather's ring, actually.
I had to dig him up for it.
Did you beat him in a bath?
I was going to say you beat him in a bath.
No, he died before I was born.
But I got the ring because we have the same name.
Huh.
Yeah, so there you go.
Wow.
Not the same ring size.
No, I had to get it right.
I have skinny fingers.
You've got a big bit of tissue paper in there.
You've got some wadded up Kleenex in there.
No, he had farmer's hands.
He was a real person.
All right.
Okay.
We talked enough about this movie.
I think so.
It's not good.
It's worst movie ever.
I think if you like these, though, if you like these movies,
I think you'll probably like this.
Like, if you're not sick of them, this is more of that.
Are you saying this is a movie for the fans?
Yes.
Because when people say the fans, they mean-
I know, we talked about this last week, but-
People who are completely uncritical of anything.
No, I just think there are universes that I am a fan of
that might not be necessarily for you know, for everybody.
And I can see why, like, there's more Captain Jack,
there's more frolicking about, and there are jokes.
I can see why, if you're a fan of this franchise,
this isn't really any better or worse than the other ones,
or it is.
Yeah, I don't know.
Like, I feel the previous ones had more exciting action set pieces,
but maybe that's just because I'm burnt.
I've seen a few of them before, so I don't know.
But again, the bank robbery scene is pretty fun.
Yeah, I quite like that.
It's ripped straight from Fast and Furious.
Oh, right, okay.
You know, dragging a vault, mate.
Yeah, dragging a vault, I get it.
Did they drag a bank as well?
No, they didn't.
Just a vault.
See, there you go.
Good point, actually.
Yeah, fresh take.
This was their opportunity to prove the rule right,
which has never been proven right,
that the fifth movie is...
It's only happened once with the Fast and Furious.
No other fifth movie has ever been good.
Yeah.
Maybe Freddy vs. Jason, if that's the fifth movie.
It is not.
Or if that movie's good.
That's like the 29th movie of those.
Great. Got some tweets here. I'm ready. This is from Sexy Matt. Hello. Or if that movie's good. That's like the 29th movie of those.
Great.
Got some tweets here.
I'm ready.
This is from Sexy Matt.
Hello.
Pirates 5 wasn't perfect, but it was a lot of fun and a good romp.
I know Mason likes a good romp.
I do like a romp.
There were some rompish elements.
There were some rompish elements.
Yeah.
This is from Beach.
Beach.
The original trilogy had more memorable characters than Dead Man,
Tale No Tales.
Salazar was cool.
These other new guys eh fair enough
this is from
Gary
but do you think
initially like the
first Pirates movie
would you have gone
Orlando Bloom
Keira Knightley
they're a bit eh
yes
because they didn't
they haven't developed
their characters yet
no I
no
well that's probably
true
but also I
I don't think
they were really
interesting in any
of those movies
no that's true.
There's a bit in the end of the first one where Lando Bloom turns up to rescue Jack Sparrow
and he's got a big feather in his hat.
That's right.
And he looks ridiculous.
There's more character development.
You know, there's the guy, the second love interest, like in the love triangle in the first one.
He's that British guy.
Oh, yeah, I like him.
First British guy.
He eventually, like, he loses his command and then he becomes a pirate.
But then he comes back.
Yeah, like, that's kind of...
Norrington.
Yes.
Yeah, I agree.
Yeah, he did a thing.
That was a good character arc, but the Land of Bloom doesn't have one.
He just one day puts a feather in his hat.
No, because he wants to kill pirates, but then he realizes his dad was a pirate.
That's right.
That was his arc.
And then he was the ocean.
Yeah.
Or he was... What do we's right. That was his arc. And then he was the ocean. Yeah. Or he was...
Yeah, that.
What do we got here?
This is from Gary.
Pirate's worst movie ever.
Depp's performance was awful.
I think the film would be better without him.
Brutal.
I think there's room for this universe.
You could do other pirate adventures.
How do you replace him, though?
You just...
Someone different.
Right, but they'd have
to be different and interesting yes so what mash used to do right oh here we go which i'm a big
fan of whenever a character left so when trapper left yes it was it was a kind of a womanizing
kind of drunk or whatever yeah they replaced him with a family man they went the opposite
with the opposite so what's the opposite of johnny depp yeah okay someone clean i don't know no maybe like yeah maybe you i guess you'd have to replace him with somebody who doesn't
want to be a pirate right who's thrown into it that would work okay sure because then maybe i
mean maybe there's no more magic in this universe or whatever but imagine like somebody who doesn't
want like like a like you get you get the bank manager you get you, like a, like you get, you get the bank manager, you get,
you get like a young, what you do is you get the, like a, the bank teller who didn't want
to be, who, who like, we, we see in flashback that the bank teller accidentally let Johnny
Depp into the vault.
Yeah.
And so he gets fired and he gets turfed out and he's like, well, what do I do now?
And then he gets like knocked on the head and wakes up on a pirate ship
and then he has to be a pirate.
He has to be a pirate.
And he doesn't want to be a pirate
but then he learns to be a pirate.
Who do you cast?
Johnny Depp.
He's got the range.
Johnny Depp,
when he was in that,
in that,
what was that movie
where he was an accountant
and he wore glasses?
Nick of Time?
Nick of Time.
You cast Nick of Time
era Johnny Depp.
There's going to have to be
some de-aging there.
Yeah.
But that's okay.
You cast Tom Holland.
Yeah, sure.
He was in a boat movie before.
He was in that...
Ghost ship?
No, he was in that Moby Dick, but it was real.
I didn't see it.
The Ron Howard one.
Hardly, hard to see.
Ron Howard's Moby Dick, but for real?
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah, I remember that movie.
This is from Total Coverage.
Pirates of the Caribbean and Bourne movies all suffer from the
which is the one where he syndrome.
Yeah.
No way of knowing.
Yeah.
There you go.
What fun, Mason.
That is fun.
What a fun week.
Next week is Wonder Woman.
Come back for that.
Yeah, good.
Hopefully it's better in every way.
Look, regardless of what happens, it'll be something to talk about.
I think so.
Absolutely it will.
If you could send me like after you watch it,
could you send me a one-word text? Okay. Just whatever you feel. The first word that If you could send me like a, after you watch it, could you send me a one word text?
Okay.
Just whatever you feel.
The first word that comes into your head after the movie,
send me one word.
But it might be unrelated.
It might be like cabbage.
That's fine.
I could send you the word cabbage.
That's fine.
If you're distracted enough that you can say cabbage,
then I'll take it.
Good.
Look, I don't think Wonder Woman's going to be groundbreaking.
I just think it's going to be solid.
Yeah.
Which I think is absolutely fine.
Not every movie has to be the greatest movie ever made.
Yeah.
All right.
What's next?
Yeah.
What are we reading?
What are we going to read?
Our famous segment.
I'm doing the thing.
What are we reading today?
What are you reading?
Oh, I finally caught up on American Gods.
Oh, you watched them all?
It's real good.
Yeah? Yeah, it's real good. hadn't weren't familiar with the source material would
you be like what's happening uh you would but you're that's also how you feel when you read
the book oh so the the the storyline plays out basically exactly more or less the same as it
does in the book so you meet some characters and mysterious stuff happens and you're like what's
going on gotcha so it's it's it's a while you're like, what's going on? Gotcha, yeah.
So it's a while before it's revealed
what's actually happening in this universe,
so it's kind of the same.
Okay.
It's an all-star cast.
Yes, it is.
Ian McShane from Pirates 4.
The guy playing Shadow.
Don't know his name.
Yep.
But those guys are great.
Again, I had some trepidation because I really loved the book at the time
and I'm like, are they going to ruin this?
But the two main characters are exactly how I imagined them in the book.
Some of the characters have been changed a little bit.
So there's a character called Technical Boy who represents modern technology in the internet.
And back when it came out, he was more like a mum's basement hacker kind of guy.
But now he's more like a YouTube star.
So he's like you now
i am a star you're right he looks a lot like dave warner key oh really excellent yeah uh so he's
more like he's more like uh isn't youtube star gross isn't that gross it is gross like it's a
gross thing to to be your yeah yeah yeah and so shat in in the in the uh tv series shadow's wife
has died played by Emily Browning.
Yes.
And she's got more of a role in this.
Strayer's own.
Yeah, it's real good.
Okay.
It's great.
It's pretty graphic at times.
Yep.
But I'm enjoying it.
You're enjoying it.
Okay.
Well, I definitely didn't hate it, so I should definitely also go back to it.
Yeah.
Also, Gillian Anderson is playing.
Oh, she's in it.
I didn't know that.
She's playing.
From what we can tell,'s playing in a she represents celebrity right i think the the the the god
of celebrity yeah and so she so far she's appeared as lucille ball it's great uh she's going to
appear as ziggy stardust david bowie stardust so in this universe the god, whoever this is, is all these different people?
No, no, she just appears as them.
Okay.
She's attempting to sort of pass a message along to Shadow.
And so initially he's in like a Walmart or like a Costco.
And she appears as Lucille Ball on the TV and starts talking to him.
And so I think she's going to appear as various celebrities.
So I'm crossing my fingers and hoping she appears as Dana Scully at one point. That would be incredible. That would be very good, right? ball on the TV and starts talking to him. And so I think she's going to appear as various celebrities.
So I'm crossing my fingers and hoping she appears as Dana Scully at one point.
That would be very good, right?
What network is this on?
This is on Starz.
You'd have to do like a knockoff.
You couldn't do it.
You could definitely do a homage.
Look, I think if you put her in the pant suit and you gave her like a badge and you gave her the bob from the 90s.
It's fine.
Yeah, it'd be fine.
100%.
That'd be great. I agree. I made my way through 13 Re the bulb from the 90s. Yeah, it's fine. Yeah, it'll be fine. 100%. That'll be great.
I agree.
I made my way through 13 Reasons Why, the Netflix series.
How'd that go?
Look, it's not for me.
Right.
Like it's the kind of a massively over-dramatized version of high school where, you know, it
deals with youth suicide and the perils of high school and bullying and, you know, and
the way rumors can go wrong and whatever.
I think if I'd have been that age, I think I would have loved it.
And I still enjoyed it, but I think it's got a pretty good message
about, hey, don't be a dick to each other.
Doesn't it also say, and I haven't watched it, but I read an article.
I say I read an article.
I'm sure I skimmed the title of an article that was in a tweet
that seemed to suggest that it's cool to kill yourself.
No, not really.
I wouldn't say.
There is a bit of kind
of because she creates this kind of because she's still she's in the afterlife is that no it's she
has a series of tapes that people listen to and then they kind of relive her life oh but she's
definitely dead definitely okay good but um but no but it's good she's dead the way it's good
they're not implying yes you can kill yourself and then you it's it's a it's a noble thing to
do or whatever and the actual i guess minor spoilers where you see her kill herself and it is brutal like it's
very difficult to watch like it's not that part of it i would say yeah that it's it's definitely
dramatized yes like on the whole like it's obviously not a real kind of high school yeah
kind of situation but you can see you know everyone has been to school you can definitely
recognize the elements that are going on there.
Yeah, but remember, school doesn't last forever.
It's very true.
And everybody who had a great time at high school is probably an asshole.
No, that's not true.
That's actually, but if, you know, you see people who were cool in high school
and they're the same, like they never got past that.
Yeah.
You know, and it's, yeah, it's kind of, that's the last thing you want to be.
Just go and leave school and just do some other stuff.
Sure.
Meet some other people.
Okay, I will.
I haven't yet, but I think I will.
You've inspired me to do something after high school now.
I also tried to watch War Machine with Brad Pitt on Netflix.
You know that?
Yeah.
What is it again?
He's the guy who's trying to end the Gulf,
sorry, the bloody war in Iraq.
Is it a wacky romp like War Dogs? Sort of, yeah. It's not sort of, it's just, I just turn guy who's trying to end the gulf um sorry the bloody war in iraq is it a wacky romp sort of yeah it's not sort of it's just i just turn it off it's just fine
is it one of those ones where it's like profiting from war's bad we're telling you that but then
they're just like making it rain on no it's not really it's more kind of like he's a stickler for
the rules and this is how you're going to withdraw the troops and it's all politics and whatever
and i feel like there's a good idea in there and it's an interesting story but i just don't think
it's super well executed.
Okay.
So it's, yeah, no, I don't know whether I'll go back to it, but I just wish it was a little
bit better.
Also, you were going to mention before the show, you told me.
Oh yeah.
Hang on.
I was going to.
Oh yeah.
There we go.
I'm ready to go.
Oh, our friends at Auntie Donna, Auntie Donna podcast, great sketch group, Auntie Donna.
Dot com.
They are, is it?
I don't know.
Maybe don't go there. They're touring the Americas, Canada sketch group, Auntie Donna. Dot com. Is it? I don't know. Maybe don't go there.
They're touring the Americas, Canada and the US.
Yes.
And they're great.
You will love seeing them live.
If you're in New York, Boston, Chicago, Toronto, Vancouver, Seattle, Portland, San Francisco,
Austin or Los Angeles, they are touring your town.
So check them out.
I will.
Next few weeks, I think.
Next few weeks. think next few weeks
excellent
it's probably auntiedonna.com
it's got to be right
it's not auntiedonnapodcast.com
I checked both
okay nice
check them out
they're very funny guys
they do a podcast
it's on Planet Broadcasting Network
correct
and you should listen to that as well
because they're real good
they're funny funny men
but they don't do the podcast live
they do live sketch
yes
to be clear
and it's it's bizarre because it feels improv, but it feels loose,
but it's clearly very well structured.
They work very, very hard to make the dumbest jokes in the world.
And it works.
It really works.
They're great.
Mason, it is letters.
It is time for letters.
Time for letters?
Time for letters.
Plastic one was letters, for letters Time for letters The classic one was
Letters
Oh letters
We love you
Some letters
They're only
A day
Away
I know they're here right now
We're going to do letters
We should also mention
We've got some more
Caravan of Garbage coming up
That's right we do
By Ben and or Matt
Or sometimes me
Yesterday's one
By the time this comes out
Will be Pirates of the Caribbean video game.
Very nice.
And it's a lot of fun.
Spoiler alert, maybe we fight a snake.
Maybe.
Yeah.
So we're trying to do one of those a week.
Yeah, right.
That's the idea.
And, yeah, it's coming.
John, who does the 8-bit trailers,
he does the 8-bit animations of us talking and that.
Isn't it weird we have 8-bit animations of us?
It's very bizarre, but he's great.
Isn't it weird any of this is happening?
It certainly is, Mason.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
But no, so that'll be linked below.
So if you want a little bit of extra Weekly Planet stuff,
people always say, do two shows.
This is sort of that, I guess.
Go and watch us yell at a video game for 20 minutes
or whatever the hell it goes for.
This is from Perry Ritter.
For someone who's never seen the Alien movies,
what's the best order to watch them in?
Hashtag Weekly Planet Pod.
If you do that on Twitter,
then we'll get your question and read it out.
Oh, good question.
Alien, Aliens, Resco in the bin.
You don't think you could then go Prometheus Covenant?
Are they worth watching?
Yeah, maybe.
No, that's not a very strong recommendation, is it?
No.
No.
Definitely Alien, Aliens.
I think each one of them is interesting in their own way.
I find three really interesting because it's of what could have been.
And four is mad.
Yeah, look, I think you should watch Alien and Aliens and the rest.
And if you are still, that still grabs you.
You can watch the rest,
but to assume that the continuity works on any level
is incorrect.
Or that the other ones top those first two in any way.
Yeah.
I mean, Prometheus looks good, doesn't it?
Yeah.
And Covenant looks good.
What about AVP?
Do those as well?
We can skip them.
Look, I like AVP too.
I know you do. Yeah, I do. You're a big dickhead. Got a letter there, Mason, in as well? We can skip them. Look, I like AVP too. I know you do.
Yeah, I do.
You're a big dickhead.
Got a letter there, Mason, in the Gmail?
No, still looking.
Okay.
How about this one?
Okay.
This is from, oh, that was from Perry Ritter, if I didn't say that.
Hashtag weekly planet prom.
Hashtag weekly planet prom.
Weekly planet prom.
We're going to do it, guys.
The official weekly planet prom.
Get your corsages, rent your limos.
Here we go get your
bucket of pig's blood that's right this is from toby falconer have you guys i went to hillsville
sanctuary recently there was a falcon show it was fucking crazy man it was the best thing i've ever
seen the falcon was swooping in and out yep so good i didn't think i'd care but i cared a lot
about it have you guys seen the valerian trailer? Thoughts? Maybe a movie to actually see in 3D.
That's not a question.
I don't want to see it in 3D.
Well, you'll have to.
It's a 3D experience, Mason.
I'm not going to.
I'm going to find a 2D screening.
And the text that said to see it in 3D was also in 3D.
Jeez!
And if we're going to go to a screening of this,
which we might depending on what company this comes out of,
I don't remember, then it will be in 3D.
Anyway, what do you think of that movie?
Valerian the Moon.
Yeah.
Looks wild.
Doesn't it?
I'm excited to see it.
I don't know if it's going to be good.
But?
Do you think the visual, if it's not good,
do you think the visuals are going to compensate
for it not being good?
That's not enough for me.
Yeah, I agree also, yeah.
But...
I think if the story is not good,
and if I can't buy that these characters are operating
in something like a real world,
I'm going to be bored out of my mind.
That's very possible.
But no, it looks...
I don't know.
I think the special effects look incredible.
Oh, the budget is 197 million euro.
That seems like a lot.
Holy shit.
It does look very expensive though, doesn't it?
Because watching this trailer, I'm like,
are these all the best, fanciest shots?
But maybe not.
Maybe it's just all that.
No, I like the cast.
The cast seems okay.
It's obviously Luc Besson who did Fifth Element
and it'd be good to see him kind of return
to that kind of wacky sci-fi world.
But no, I'm very much looking forward to this.
There's a good chance that it'll like John Carter it,
but hey, some things do John Carter it,
like Jupiter ascending,
which was either before or after John Carter.
What's next?
I'm still looking for letters.
There's so many letters.
A lot of people have asked because we realized a couple of weeks ago
that you can actually,
when somebody sends you an email through the Gmail app,
you can provide them with, you've got three canned response options.
Yes.
So some people have just said, hang on,
so Mark Garnett has emailed, his letter is entitled canned response,
give me one, but that doesn't provide enough context
to get a canned response.
So you have to ask a question or have a safe thing.
You have to have some substance in there.
There you bloody go.
Indwin has said, likes our podcast a lot.
It always makes me laugh.
Helps me understand some of the things my boyfriend talks about.
I assume comic book movie related, but maybe just in life.
Maybe.
Maybe she's like, oh, my boyfriend said that incredibly dumb thing.
Like those guys say dumb things.
I get why he's so dumb now.
Also, could I get the sure thing response?
Is that an option?
No, I've got thanks for the feedback.
I'm glad you liked it.
Thank you for your support.
I'm glad you liked it.
Do that one.
I'm going to do thanks for the feedback.
Okay.
Thanks for the feedback.
God, that is the most generic thing you could say to somebody
Yeah it is
Nice there we go
Thank you Edwin
Yeah
I got a letter here
Because I've just dipped into the Gmail just now
Oh yeah
It's from Ami Yamoto
She says
Hey guys thanks for entertaining me every week
The pods and vids
After seeing him in Suicide Squad
Do you think Jai Courtney could be good if Mad Max
In Mad Max if Tom Hardy left the role
P.S. can I be the official CGI character of the podcast?
She has a YouTube channel.
Yes.
And it's like vlogs and things like that,
except she takes footage of herself and makes a CGI version of herself
She's got a little avatar here.
Yeah, it's crazy.
I don't know how she does it.
She's a YouTube star.
She's a YouTube star.
Everybody should check her out then.
Yeah, absolutely.
But no, I've just always been impressed with that
because I have no idea how it works.
And also they're entertaining as well.
So two things I don't understand.
Yes.
But no, would you think Jai Courtney could be a good Mad Max?
Yes.
I genuinely think he could.
Yeah.
Because I've seen him be good.
Right.
And Mad Max also doesn't really need any personality.
That's true.
He just needs to be able to run across the top of a big oil tanker
and swing on a chain or whatever.
So no, absolutely. Do you hate Jai Courtney?
I love him
okay good
it's only one or the other
you can only love him or hate him
very true
I'm still looking for a letter
god Mason take forever
but don't literally take forever obviously
how is there not one entertaining letter
they're so good that's the problem
so they're all so good
so you can't pick one.
So many good.
Oh, this is a good one.
This is from Cyrus Feldman.
His buddy and he just went and saw The Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2.
He'd say, best movie ever.
All right.
His one problem was that there was a guy in the cinema
that kept singing along with every song.
No.
Whether it was a song juxtaposed with a quiet character-building moment
or a heart-throbbing action scene,
this man kept singing along like he was in his own private karaoke section unacceptable my question to y'all is what's the most distracting
experience you've had in a movie cinema how about that oh good okay i don't know would you have one
i'd have to think about it no i also didn't have one i was hoping to throw you onto the bus there
one one okay one i can remember when i saw deep impact at a birthday party at school. Wait, this has got a lot of levels.
You're out of school watching a movie for someone's birthday?
You know, it's a birthday party for a guy from school.
We went and saw Deep Impact.
Oh, I see.
That makes more sense.
Which isn't fun in any way as a movie.
But there were some kids up the back who were talking the whole time
and making really terrible jokes. I remember one joke specifically. There's a bit where the back who were like talking the whole time, talking the whole time and making really terrible jokes.
I remember one joke specifically.
There's a bit where the ocean floods New York
and you see the Statue of Liberty's head go past
and a kid yells out, that's my head.
And all these friends laugh.
That's very good.
And at the end, a mum got up and yelled at him.
It's like, you ruined this for everybody and whatever.
Look, they were being assholes.
But I don't have any qualms.
If someone's really like arcing up,
I'll tell someone to shut up.
I don't care.
But I find it less and less now though.
Maybe it's because we do screening sometimes.
And no, but I think it's also,
I think assigned seating.
Yeah, that probably.
Because people are like,
I think people think
that we can track them down
by their seat
number right yeah like i could go to the box office and be like those children were tell me
who they were give me their card details yeah but i think no actually rogue one was very distracting
because there were some women behind me who were thought k2so was i talked about this when we saw
it yeah the funniest thing that's ever happened and he's not that funny that's true yeah so that
was very distracting.
Yeah.
But also I can't be like, shut up because you're enjoying this too much.
That's true.
If someone's doing something unrelated, that's different, I guess.
That is actually, I can't think of a specific one,
but there have been movies where people are just, maybe it was Deadpool.
That makes a lot of sense.
Where people are just enjoying it so much.
I'm just like, no.
This is unrelated, but I don't like it when you go see the theatre
and whenever a song finishes or even before it has,
there's that one person who stands up just before everybody else
to show that they enjoyed it on that level just a bit above everybody else.
Yeah, right.
I do not care for that.
What was that movie?
Batman. No. It was that movie? Batman.
No.
It was a movie about climbing mountains
and there were people trapped on a mountain.
Oh, Vertical Limit.
We saw that together.
We saw that together
and that movie was so bad that...
Everybody was heckling.
Everybody in the cinema was heckling
and it actually brought us all together.
Yeah, it did.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's incredible.
Yeah.
That's a funny movie.
Yeah.
It's not.
No, it's not supposed to be. And we can't go back because it'll just be a dull, bad movie. Yeah. It's incredible. Yeah. That's a funny movie. Yeah. It's not. No, it's not supposed to be.
And we can't go back because it'll just be a dull, bad movie.
Yeah.
But if, but yeah.
Stu was there?
Yeah, I remember Stu.
I remember that.
He's dead now.
It's not true.
No, I think he just had a kid actually.
Yeah, as close to being dead as you can get without being dead.
Don't I bloody know it.
That's what I'm saying.
I'm saying that should come back.
Okay.
Yeah.
But I think it's okay if you go to like a
screening of a bad movie
I think that's completely acceptable
maybe there should be that
do you hear one cinema
I can't remember where
was talking about bringing in
you could text in that theatre
yeah right
E4 against it
look if there's a session
if they want to waste money
on running a session
for people who want to text
I don't care
I think that's a slippery slope
I think if people go
I'm allowed to text,
I'm also going to take phone calls and make phone calls.
Yeah.
And Snapchat.
I reckon people in that cinema, people would Snapchat.
Because you give them an inch, they'll take them all.
Yeah, that's probably true.
I find I'm not super distracted by a lot of stuff that happens
in movie theatres, but in live events.
I went to a comedy gig once where a person was on stage
as a series of characters.
So they couldn't break character.
And there was a person dead center, front row, texting.
Not cool.
Not cool at all.
Like I said, the glow was lighting up and this woman was on stage and couldn't break character.
It was all a series of pre-written bits.
Yeah.
Going like, what am I doing? Why am bits. Yeah. Going like,
what am I doing?
Why am I... Yeah.
So the whole time just text me.
The whole time.
Just leave.
Yeah, just leave.
Exactly.
Fair enough.
I've also seen people
come in like 35 minutes
into a 50-minute show.
Oh, really?
What are you doing?
Into a comedy show.
No, you don't do that.
Yeah, it's weird.
Yeah, do they get made fun of?
Sometimes.
Good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Now, you've got a trick
for dealing with
if a comedian picks on you. You just give them nothing. Like one-word responses. No, Yeah. Now, you've got a trick for dealing with if a comedian picks on you.
You just give them nothing.
Like one word responses.
No, no.
Well, I...
Or you'll go along with it because, you know...
Yeah, just be...
Here's a tip.
A lot of people are afraid to sit in the front row of a comedy show
because they're afraid the comedian will pick on them.
Here's all you have to do.
Be honest.
Answer quickly.
Right, yeah.
That's all you have to do, right?
If you stumble, if they're like, what's your name?
And you're like, John. They'll be like,'ll be like oh john is that is it a fake did you give me a fake
name kind of thing and they'll they'll they'll hammer you but if you're just like john they're
like okay what do you do work in an office okay cool they'll just move on just they're like so if
you show any weakness they'll show weakness they'll pounce if you're there on a first date or something
yeah that's right just roll with it it's fine just tell them that it's fine they'll let all they want to do yeah is segue into their
pre-prepared material so just roll with it for a couple of for 30 seconds and they'll leave you
alone i got heckled by dylan moran once but you know dylan moran he was in black books he's a
great comedian i went and saw him and i was with claire my wife oh yes and i turned my phone off
i'm like give me your phone
and I'll turn it off.
And as I turned it off,
he saw it and he went
into like a 10 minute tirade
of people who spent
too much time on their phones
and this and that.
And I'm like,
I was trying to do the right thing.
Did you tell him that?
No, it was,
what am I going to do?
Explain myself.
Yeah, I was turning it off.
But also,
I should have turned it off
before I got in there,
which I did.
Anyway.
Wow.
Whatever.
Anyway, I like him a lot.
I've watched Black Books again recently.
It's real good.
It is good.
It's from Giuseppe.
Hello.
Do you think people are going to get The Rock fatigue soon?
Please tell me.
Please tell the dog he's a dickhead.
She's a dickhead.
She's a dickhead.
I think they will.
I hope we don't.
How many movies does he do a year?
50.
It feels like that, doesn't it?
Four, maybe?
Three or four?
That's too many.
Three?
Four?
Like, too many, like I've said?
No, no, no.
When you think of, like, Stars of Yesteryear.
Sure.
Like a Charlie Chaplin.
I went back a bit further.
How many movies did they make a year?
Probably tons.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because there was no effort put into them.
That's exactly right.
Well, as long as he's put...
See, that's the thing.
I think The Rock 100% puts into every movie he does.
He does, yeah.
So unless he's got heretofore undiscovered depths that he...
Maybe he's at 50% now.
He could be.
What if he grabs it right up to 100%?
What if he's 50% as big as he really could potentially be?
That's right, yeah.
He could double in size.
Incredible.
But I think everything that I love or used to love,
I've burnt out on.
And I think this is going to go for people
who listen to this show as well.
Absolutely, yeah.
Eventually.
We'll churn through some people.
No, if you haven't already, yeah,
you burn out on things that you love.
For example, you remember Zero Punctuation?
Oh, yeah.
He still does it.
He's great.
He inspired you to start YouTube.
He absolutely did.
He was one of the guys that I thought, oh thought oh yeah people could do this i could steal that
animation style you just say whatever yeah but um and i i still like him and i still check in
occasionally but i would religiously every week go back so i think that's just one example you
burn out on everything i think eventually especially if you overdo it that's why people
go oh listen i went back and I listened to all 100 whatever episodes
of our show
I'm like oh
we probably shouldn't
do that
yeah
got any more letters
or are we going to
call this a bloody
let's call it letters
let's call it a letter
let's call it letters
alright good
that's the show
for this week
that's the show
we did it
what do you want to say
let's see
we're at Weekly Planet
Pod on Facebook
and Gmail
and Twitter
and Bandcamp
I'm at Wikipedia Brown
on Twitter
I'm at Mr Sunday Movies
thank you
the Brew and the Bass
can rack them for all our themes
there's a few things we should do
we should do the
Suicide Squad commentary this week
we should do the Q&A
for the charity
because those
our listeners
the Weekly Wacken
who's raised
tens of thousands of dollars
for charity
so we probably should do that Q&A
that should be enough for them
don't you think
that they're helping somebody
why do we have to contribute to this?
That's a really good point.
It's horseshit.
No, I've got a lot going on at the moment.
Alright, we get it.
I'm not just talking about my...
We've all got a lot going on, mate.
Alright.
I just mean,
yeah,
we'll get to those things
as soon as we can.
Yep.
What else?
Let's see,
if you want to support the show,
you can go to patreon.com
slash MrSundayMovies.
Correcto.
We've also got an Amazon affiliate link
if you'd like to go there
and buy all the other, however many, Pirates of the Caribbean movies. Don't do it. also got an Amazon affiliate link if you'd like to go there and buy all the other
however many Pirates of the Caribbean movies.
Don't do it.
Check them all out.
Marathon them all.
Don't do it.
Let us know what happened to your life.
There's a link in the episode description.
You click through.
Just buy what you're going to buy anyway.
And we're going to kick back somehow.
We're going to get a massive kick.
Thank you everybody for listening.
Yeah.
Thank you everybody who sends in a nice art.
Yeah.
People send in an art.
Isn't it crazy that people will send in an art?
I love an art. Me too. You a big fan? Thanks to everybody who sends in a nice art. Yeah. People send in an art. Isn't it crazy that people will send in an art? I love an art.
Me too.
You a big fan?
Thanks to everybody who sends in like a hot tip or like a news article.
Do you have any hot tips lately?
I've got some hot tips that I'll share with you off air.
Oh, really?
There's a couple of hot tips in there.
Can you not say them on the podcast?
Can't say them on the podcast.
Because they're spoiler?
I'll vet them.
I'll vet no because they're like insider.
Oh, okay.
I'll vet them with you and then we'll say them next week.
Okay.
Yeah.
All right.
Hot tips there.
They're not that hot, if I'm honest.
Okay, good.
They're lukewarm tips, if anything.
Oh, very good.
What else do we say?
We've got some teas on TeePublic.
Our logo t-shirts are back if you want to buy one.
They're back, baby.
Just go to teepublic.com and type Weekly Planet and they'll be in there.
Yep.
Mm-hmm.
That's it.
That's it.
Next week, Wonder Woman.
Go out and see it if you're interested
yeah because we'll do
non-spoilers then spoilers
yep
as we should normally do
as we normally do
yeah
what's after that
what happens the week after that
something big
I think it's the mummy
yeah it is the mummy
there's a bunch of stuff
coming up in a row
so I know people also
get sick of seeing movies
every week
because they're like
can you do a regular show
this is the period of time
where there's like
five weeks in a row
where it's just movies
it's blockbuster season and then we struggle
with topics then if you could tell you what if you want to send us some topics if you want if
you want to do a topic we've got we've got a backlog but if you want to send if you think
of a fun topic uh let us know now and we'll we'll get to it and yeah maybe maybe we'll get maybe
we'll get i do have a list somewhere yeah yeah. All right, everybody, have a good week. Grab that jammie, guys.
We'll see you next week.
This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network.
Visit planetbcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates.
I mean, if you want.
It's up to you.
FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship
between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret, the other a mission to reveal it
before thousands of lives are lost.
Fx's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.