The Weekly Planet - 423 Ranking Every Batman Movie
Episode Date: February 28, 2022Visit bigsandwich.co for a bonus weekly show, exclusive movie commentaries, early stuff and ad-free podcast feeds for $9 per month.Leading into the worldwide release of The Batman (a movie I have seen... btw) we take a look back through time at all the cinematic releases of the character and where they rank in relation to each other. Thanks for listening!9 Insane Batman Theories: https://youtu.be/2uqXCzYiuZQJames on FOFOP: https://tofop.com/fofop/mirin/00:00 The Start05:47 The Batman's Penguin Spin-Off08:03 Robat Battinbat Big Suit News08:49 Steven Spielberg's Bullitt14:51 Tom Holland's James Bond Pitch17:43 Russo Brother Multiverse Warning19:59 Charlie Cox Daredevil Future21:42 Marvel Netflix Shows on Disney Plus22:43 The Oscars Drama30:19 Ranking The Batman Movies01:29:46 What We Reading, What We Gonna Read01:37:12 Letters, It's Time For LettersJames' Twitter â–º http://twitter.com/mrsundaymoviesMaso's Twitter â–º http://twitter.com/wikipediabrownPatreon â–º https://patreon.com/mrsundaymoviesTWP iTunes â–º https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-weekly-planet/id718158767TWP Direct Download â–º https://play.acast.com/s/theweeklyplanetTWP YouTube Channel â–º https://goo.gl/1ZQFGHAmazon Affiliate Link â–º https://amzn.to/2QbmwGjT-Shirts/Merch â–º https://www.teepublic.com/stores/mr-sunday-movies Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Red hot comic book movie news. Shooting up your butt hole. podcast from our great mates.
Welcome back everybody to another episode of the Weekly Planet where we talk movies and comics and TV shows. My name is James, also known as Mr. Sunday, but with me as always
is my co-host, Mr. Nicholas P. Mason.
That's me, I'm doing very well.
That was a lot of enthusiasm.
You really barreled through that intro.
May I explicitly reveal that this episode is a real throwback to back in the day
because you are extremely hungover.
I'm a blistering hungover.
Yes, I went away on our annual boys boys golf trip where I don't play golf
and I show up late to eat food and drink.
And I'm just not feeling myself because of all the alcohol that I consume.
Would you say you've pulled up better than the last time you did this?
Probably.
I mean, I don't know.
I think I'm probably like, because I'm generally probably healthier.
Sure.
I think my body's like, we'll give you this one, but do not do this again.
We'll give you this one, but if you attempt it next year,
you will immediately die.
But actually, I feel, I'm all right.
I've had some Patadol.
I'm having some caffeinated beverages,
and I'm excited to talk about all things.
Would you want me to go through the list of things
we will discuss this week?
Yes, please.
Before the main topic.
Because it's Batman Eve, isn't it?
It is, yeah.
It's the Batman Eve.
Yeah. So we've got a bit of news it? It is, yeah. It's the Batman Eve. Yeah.
So we've got a bit of news in relation to that, including spin-offs.
Do you have Robert Pattinson big suit news?
Big tweed suit news?
Don't worry, I'll cover that.
I'll cover that.
I'll cover that, mate.
Well, you've got two bits of news, so I'll put that in,
and I'll put in the other thing that you mentioned.
Terrific.
Tom Holland, more information on his, what he wanted to do with James Bond.
Joe Russo, one of the directors of the Avengers movies,
talked about the multiverse and the dangers of dabbling in it.
Charlie Cox talks about his role in Daredevil and Spider-Man.
We mentioned weeks ago that we're just going to spoil it.
Everybody knows at this point, right?
I think so, yeah.
It's everywhere.
There's also what's going on with Marvel Netflix and Oscar
and Oscar update.
I know you love the Oscars, Mason.
I do.
And then we are going to be.
I love it when they just tear away bits of the Oscar telecast.
That's part of it, yeah.
They've taken away a lot of that.
But also we're going to be, because it is Batman's Eve,
the Batman's Eve, we're going to be ranking every Batman
and every Batman movie. That's right. In very quick succession. We're going to be ranking every Batman and every Batman movie.
That's right.
In very quick succession.
We're probably going to spend about 10 seconds on each, I reckon.
Just going to blitz through them, yeah.
And we do not want any feedback.
There's pretty good odds that the order we rank them in
will be the order in which they came out chronologically.
66 Batman, worst Batman.
Yeah, we didn't like it, actually.
I didn't like Batman better than that Batman
Batman Returns
is better Batman
Cardboard was a good one
in that one
third Batman
whatever third Batman
was called
better
better Batman
we can actually put this
up top of that
and then we can just go
oh that's incredible
okay cool
let me just
god we don't have to
talk about them again
yeah
that's great
so if you do want to
jump around there
are of course time codes
just a quick reminder
I was on Fof Fop last week.
I mentioned it.
I only mentioned it again because it wasn't out when the show came out.
There you go.
Charlie Clawson and I, we talked about it.
Was he mad?
He was very mad.
We talked about Hey Hey Saturday.
We talked about bodybuilding and people who take a bunch of steroids and die.
We talked about dad stuff, you know, the trifecta.
The three cultural touchstones that you three have in common.
Yes, the triforce.
Anyway, let's talk about it.
It is a big Batman time of week, and I just want to point out also,
more of a brag than anything, I have seen it.
I saw it on Friday.
I'm not allowed to say anything.
Shout out to Oscar, who was at the screening.
The grouch.
No, no, Mason.
That's a pretty hack joke.
What about a different Oscar?
You could have said...
The Oscar Meyer Wienermobile.
There we go.
Was sitting next to you.
Yes, there we go.
Did it block your view at all?
No, it was fine.
It's a very large vehicle.
Yeah, yeah, I could see through the windscreen.
It was all right, yeah.
But it was very nice.
The entire Oscars telecast was sitting next to you.
It was sitting in front of me, yes.
With a big hat on, no less.
But it was great to meet him and just talk about the Batman after.
So even though if you've, like, legally, if you've signed a,
if you've seen it in some places, you haven't signed anything,
there's been a bunch of, like, very positive reviews, like, coming out,
but not if you've signed an embargo, which is going up on Monday.
So if you managed to see the Batman, but you somehow sort of uncovered a loophole, which
means you can talk about it, you can say it's good or whatever.
It was wild because there was like, they're like, this is a very exclusive thing.
Not many people can go.
You get one ticket.
And I'm like, well, I'm taking that ticket.
Nick Mason can go to hell.
I said in a return email.
And they're like, we don't.
What are you?
Okay.
Wow.
Anyway, I got there. And then I'm texting Jay. Hey, James, just let you know I'm in a return email. And they're like, we don't, what are you, okay. Anyway, I got there.
And then I'm texting, hey, James, just let you know I'm trapped
in hell currently.
I can't make any movies this week.
So I had fun at the movies, I guess.
Yeah.
But they just, there was no security.
They just let people in.
They didn't check anybody's name.
And I was like, I nearly messaged you.
Do you have to put the phone in the little pouch thing?
No.
Whoa. And there was like eight people there in this enormous be like put the phone in the little pouch no whoa
and there was like eight people there in this enormous cinema like this is wild what is this
anyway and the remaining the remaining seven people besides you were part of like a gang
that was filming it all it was a boom mic guy and a camera guy director guy yeah craft services guy
that's right anyways look i'm um i'm really looking forward to talking about it for reasons
that I obviously cannot go into, but just to
emphasise, I have seen it and
suck shit, Mason. You gotta help.
Basically. Hey, I've seen
heaps of worse movies before
you. Oh yeah? Name one.
You don't have to name one.
No, I can't think of any.
Anyway, and speaking of, Matt Reeves
who of course directed that movie,
said yes at the moment.
You're not going to believe this, but they are talking about part two.
They are making that happen.
And look, it is.
And people are immediately like, where's Superman?
Is Superman in this universe?
What's Superman going to do?
Well, apparently it's not something they've done.
What about all the other heroes?
Greenland?
Where's Greenland?
Where's Wonder Woman?
What are they doing in there?
I guess I can't talk about it that much, but I have seen it.
We are aware.
But Matt Reeves has talked about how they're not really
interested in doing that at this point in time.
But you could if you really wanted to.
Is there a scene where Jim Gordon picks up
the phone and he's like, Batman, should I call
the entire Justice League that exists in this universe?
And Batman's like, no, no, I'll handle this
myself. Yeah, I think I'm going to take a year to
solve this actually.
If you don't mind. Yeah, look, it's just the citizens of no, I'll handle this myself. Yeah, I think I'm going to take a year to solve this actually. If you don't mind.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Look, it's just the citizens of Gotham.
It doesn't matter.
It's fine.
That's it.
But that being said, and I've said this, I said this of the Nolan verse as well.
Give us a Superman that isn't very good.
And by not good, I mean like the 40s Superman.
The one who can jump.
They can leap tall buildings.
Give us that guy.
Absolutely. Not as good as regular Superman, but interesting, I think. Yeah, that can jump. They can leap tall buildings. Give us that guy. Absolutely.
Not as good as regular Superman, but interesting, I think.
Yeah, that's what everyone says when he turns up.
Why don't we get this guy?
Why can't we have regular Superman?
Look, regular Superman's just up in the sky there, flying.
That's his whole thing.
He's shaking his head at us.
I don't know what that means.
I don't like this.
Anyway, Colin Farrell also talked about the Penguin spin-off,
which is apparently happening.
It is going to be R-rated as opposed to the movie, which is PG-13.
Does that mean he can smoke a cigarillo?
That's right.
Because apparently he was not allowed to smoke any kind of cigar
or cigarette or cigarillo.
Yeah, so it's PG-13, but apparently it's not in England, I believe.
It's still R-rated.
And it's pretty like, it's not like gory, but it's a spooky time,
a lot of it.
So I understand why it got that rating.
Interesting to see whether that affects the box office.
But apparently, though, that way they can explore more violence
and darkness in the character of the penguin.
Okay.
So they get more punching.
That makeup on him is wild.
They get more punching, but they get no cigarettes.
That's right, no cigarettes.
You can smoke a cigar, can't you?
What's wrong with smoking a cigar?
I don't know.
Like in a movie.
What's the significant? Kids aren't, look at this horrible-looking man smoking a cigar, can't you? And what's wrong with smoking a cigar? I don't know. Like in a movie like John Green, what's that? What's the
significant? Like kids aren't, look at this horrible looking
man smoking a cigar. Yeah, he's cool all of a sudden.
Yeah, I like this actually. Yeah, so there you go.
Maybe they should have given him chewing tobacco. Maybe they
should have. Now I've just written a note here.
Grosser. I've written a note here
that just says big tweed. Is this something you
wanted to say? Just Robert Pattinson and
Zoe Kravitz went to a movie,
went to the Batman premiere.
They're having fun, aren't they?
And Zoe Kravitz was wearing a classic black dress
and Robert Pattinson was wearing a very large sort
of double-breasted tweed suit.
Big wide?
Big and wide?
Not hugely wide but very long.
Oh, okay.
Like nearly zoot suit proportions.
Remember zoot suits?
Oh, I remember.
I remember. Remember the zoot suit, right? zoot suits? Oh, I remember. I remember.
Remember the zoot suit, right?
Yes.
Remember the cherry poppin' daddies?
I remember Scar.
Do you remember the squirrel nut zippers?
Yes, I do, Max.
Of course you do.
And real big fish, et cetera.
Yeah, I mean, that's Scar, not Swing, but all right.
Yes, all right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I can't think of another one.
I'm too hungover.
That's okay.
You don't have to.
Good.
Anyway, so he wore a big suit.
But the other note here I've got is, and you told me this just before the show.
You could have said Royal Crown Review.
I didn't want to say that.
Yeah, no, I didn't think so.
Is that Spielberg is making Bullets?
Not making Bullets.
Apparently, according to Deadline,
Steven Spielberg is interested in making another movie,
a new movie around the character of Frank Bullets,
who famously McQueen played in the late 60s.
And people like, but people, again, as with every auteuse movie maker,
you know, from decades past who've decided to do anything
or say anything, the entire internet got very upset about it.
I don't, I mean, again, this is the first time I'm hearing of it.
Yes.
And is it true?
I don't know. Well, Deadline said it. Yeah, but I don't believe you. They're more than. I don't, I mean, again, this is the first time I'm hearing of it. And is it true? I don't know.
What deadline set it? Yeah, but I don't believe you.
I don't believe you.
I didn't open it!
I do believe you.
But the idea of like
continuing the story of this guy,
because isn't there a bunch of novels about this guy?
No, there's just the one. Is there really?
It's Mute Witness by
Robert L. Pike, real name robert l
fish i think we've talked about i think maybe we discussed it on a bonus episode yeah but uh
but yeah there's there's uh as far as i know it's just the one yeah uh so there's no there's nothing
else to adapt so it'd have to be an original story yeah and then well the thing about it is
because i think it's it's one of those things like it's kind of wrapped up in myth yeah because it's
it's steve mcqueen yeah here's your issues with it it's ste of wrapped up in myth because it's Steve McQueen.
Here's your issues with it.
It's Steve McQueen whose nickname was the King of Cool.
That's true.
So you've got to get an actor who is cool.
Who's cooler than Steve McQueen?
I don't know.
Let's spitball some names.
Statham.
No.
I feel like if it was 2004, they would have put Statham. They might have.
Yeah, because he can scowl behind the wheel of a big car.
Yeah, he did an Italian job. But I think there's like, I think,
and maybe it's just the decades that have passed.
But I look at Steve McQueen and go, yeah, he seems like a cool guy.
Ryan Gosling.
I was thinking Ryan Gosling.
That's an option.
But it's sort of, there's a difference.
And that's Drive.
That's McGowan.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's a difference between someone actually being cool
and being like Hollywood's decided they're cool.
Yeah.
And then all of a sudden people are giving him.
You're like the Machine Gun Kelly effect.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like you're interested in this guy who looks like the underside
of a skateboard.
Yeah, I am.
And then they get all sorts of brand deals and free stuff
and all this sort of stuff.
Yeah.
And it's like, well, that's not cool.
Yeah.
What about, I think, because, yeah, Adam Driver.
I do like that.
Yeah.
He's great.
He was my two thoughts.
And he doesn't look like him, I think, which is a strength. He was my two thoughts. And he has to keep his hair long. Yeah. Obviously. He's great. He was my two thoughts. And he doesn't look like him, I think, which is a strength.
He was my two thoughts.
And he has to keep his hair long.
Yeah.
Obviously.
It's fine.
Obviously.
I was thinking Adam Driver.
Yep.
I was thinking of Mimi Driver.
Oh.
Also, Steve McQueen was a Marine and Adam Driver's a Marine.
Oh, that's true, actually.
Was Mimi Driver a Marine?
The fictional woman Mimi Driver.
What's her name?
Mimi Driver.
Thank you.
I always do that.
I did that as a suggestion.
Or John David Washington.
Oh, from Tenet.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's cool, right?
I like that a lot, actually.
And he was in that Netflix show, the movie that was sort of man on the run.
Bullet.
No, not Bullet.
Netflix is Bullet.
We remade it for Netflix.
Remade for TV.
That's good, actually.
And they put it in a 4.3 format.
Just bad.
That's cool.
What about Pattinson, then, if we're talking Tenet?
He's weird.
He's really weird.
His big suit weird.
Yeah.
And also I think another thing about Bullets.
I just like talking about Bullets,
and I think it's partly because the first time I saw it,
I'm like, this isn't anything.
And then I saw it on a really big screen and i'm like no this is good
yeah because the car chase it also is like a real yeah it's not a real car chase but it's like steve
mcqueen did a lot of the driving yeah and the the guy it's pretty unique for the time yeah yeah
exactly yeah and it's like so if it doesn't have these, if it doesn't have like a cool, like a really cool guy in the lead role
and it doesn't have an interesting, or if it does have a car chase,
people are like, well, it's just the last movie, isn't it?
Yeah.
Or is this guy a car chase guy?
What is this bloody?
I also think that like Spielberg is like,
no, I haven't seen West Side Story,
but apparently it's like a really incredible like update.
Yeah, right.
Of the original.
Yeah.
And maybe this is, maybe he's like the perfect guy and he's of that era as well
to make this.
Well, I saw people go, oh, Spielberg, he can't direct action.
And it's like he directed Indiana Jones movies.
He directed Jaws.
Of course he can.
He directed Ready Player One.
That had a big car chase in it.
A car chased a King Kong or something through a digital maze.
Yeah, but I would be very curious, who is, man or woman, who's cool?
Who's a cool person?
You know who's cool?
Olivia Wilde's cool.
Is she cool?
Yeah.
She's cool, Mason.
She could be Frank Bullitt.
Yeah.
Who else is cool?
I don't know.
But I think there's so many people you go,
is that person cool or are we just being told they're cool?
Yeah.
You know?
There's a difference.
You're absolutely right.
I can have him drive a Cadillac.
He is cool.
I like him.
I know I can hit like me.
I wonder if that.
That's cool.
That is cool.
Is that because we don't know anything?
It's cool for me.
Is it because we don't know anything about him?
I think that's probably a big factor.
And he seems nice.
And I think being nice is cool.
You know what I mean? Because Paul Rudd's nice and we don't know anything about him. But I a big factor. And he seems nice. And I think being nice is cool. You know what I mean?
Because Paul Rudd's nice and we don't know anything about him.
But I wouldn't say... And he's cool.
He's cool, but it's a different kind of cool.
But he's not like an action movie cool.
But Adam Driver is kind of cool.
Yeah, I like how cool he is. What about one of the
Scarsguards?
Any of them. Oh, maybe one of the Scarsguards.
I thought you were going to say one of the Sklar brothers.
Maybe. Comedy duo, the Sklar brothers.
Which one, though? Randy Sklar. Alright then,
let's do it. Yeah. Okay, we should move on, though.
Okay, cool. Let us know if you
email in or tweet at us, more likely.
Who's actually cool? Who's cool?
Hashtag actually cool. Yeah, you don't need any
explanation. Maybe post a picture. Yeah, yeah.
And it's not Tom Holland. You know who would be cool?
Back off if you think it's Tom Holland.
It's not. I mean, he's kind of cool.
He's nice.
He seems like a nice, yeah.
I reckon maybe Daniel Craig if he wasn't famous.
Some people said Daniel Craig, yeah.
If he wasn't, but I reckon he's too famous now.
Like if you got him during Layer Cake, he'd be perfect.
Yeah, for sure.
But he's just James Bond.
Yeah.
Like, you know, which sounds like an insult.
And it is.
Fuck him.
He's rich.
I don't care.
Yeah.
Anyway, no, he seems very nice and cool also
anyway tom holland opened up to uh seth meyers about his pitch for little james bond boy oh
this and he said that's my junior yeah so i pitched this idea for the movie i'm gonna do
the voice this week if you don't know that please do so i pitched this idea for i'll give you the
vote quarter here we go which is kind of a stupid idea. Essentially, you wouldn't tell the audience
that it was a James Bond movie until the end,
but from a marketing point of view, that's a nightmare.
Like they don't make any sense.
Did he become Italian for a second there?
Yeah, that's right.
Like that doesn't make any sense.
I like the idea of doing a spy movie
and then at the end revealing it's a James Bond movie,
but yes, that is a mistake to market it that way.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
And I think if people were watching a Tom Holland spy thriller
and then at the end he went, I'm James Bond,
people would be very upset.
Sure, yeah.
But I also enjoy that.
I think that would be pretty.
What if at the end of Uncharted he just went,
I'm actually James Bond?
What we did is we purchased.
He's explaining the studio.
What we did is we purchased the rights to Uncharted.
You're the box.
Okay.
What we did is we bought the rights to Uncharted
and then we just threw away everything and said,
I'll be James Bond in the end.
That would be funny.
Just completely burn one franchise for the sake of this stupid reveal.
And you might be thinking, were there any
hints along the way that I was James Bond?
No, there was none.
There wasn't a single thing.
That would be so funny.
Anyway.
James, if we had the keys to some movie studios,
we wouldn't have them for very long.
We would be fired.
We'd get one out, though.
We'd make something insane.
See, when you say, like you say it would be a mistake to reveal
it would be a James Bond at the end.
For money it would be.
I think it would be for Tom, if it was Tom Holland.
But I don't know.
I wonder if word of mouth would spread.
Like I wonder if we live in, live in such a risk-averse industry
that maybe people will be like, oh, this is –
You might be right.
Excuse me?
What happens at the end of it?
Especially if it's good.
Yeah, people are like, this movie is so good,
you never bloody believe what happens at the end of it.
The only example I can think of that is that Split –
it might be Split, it might be another one –
is an unbreakable sequel.
Yeah.
I'm trying to think of a recent example because –
The movie Psycho.
Yeah, the movie Psycho.
Yes.
Well, you think it's about-
Oh, okay.
No, I mean as in like it's actually a part of a franchise.
Oh, I see, right.
Like Split was-
Oh, okay, sure, sure, sure.
In the Night Shyamalan universe.
Well, Psycho is obviously part of the Psycho franchise.
That's true.
Original Psycho and then Vince Vaughn Psycho.
Yes.
And Hesh Psycho.
And Hesh Psycho.
So there you go. Which is just, they're not, itughn Psycho. Yes. And Hesh Psycho. And Hesh Psycho. So there you go.
Which is just, they're not, it's not a remake.
It's two identical incidences with identically named people.
Really?
Happened in different decades, yeah.
That's very bizarre.
Yeah, yeah.
Anyway, good work, Tom Holland.
I like your thinkings.
Anyway, Joe Russo.
Oh, one of the Russo brothers.
That's right.
He spoke to IGN about the multiverse.
Joe Russo, one of the Russo brothers.
That's right.
Wow. He said, the corporate agenda the multiverse. Joe Russo, one of the Russo brothers. That's right. Wow.
He said, the corporate agenda is, do you like chocolate ice cream?
Well, here's chocolate ice cream with sprinkles.
Here's chocolate ice cream with fudge.
It's their job to turn the money printer on.
It's a creative job to say, well, shit, I don't know if I want to watch that.
So he said, so yeah, too much of one.
This is very dangerously close to a Martin Scorsese style analogy, isn't it?
It's a turning on his own.
What else could it be like, Mr. Joe Russo of the Russo Brothers?
Like a carnival ride, Joe Russo of the Russo Brothers?
Watch your words carefully, Russo.
This is interesting.
Russet Potato Brothers.
So yeah, too much of one thing is a bad thing,
but I think there's enough smart creators and innovators in the space
where you can expect to be surprised.
Just don't expect corporations to surprise you.
That's interesting.
And he said a similar thing for like Star Wars.
But I think that is true because there is like the thinking a lot of the time
and you see it with franchises where people are going to love this,
we're going to throw everything in it,
and it's just like this is actually bad.
You've made a bad thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it's clear like this is a corporate decision too.
Do you think he is referring to specifically?
Morbius, yes.
I guess Morbius but also the Multiverse of Madness.
Maybe.
Like I mean they've sort of, are the Russo brothers out
of Marvel just generally?
At the moment, but I think they're probably doing something
like Secret Wars.
Because they're doing the Grey Man, right? Yeah, but I think
they're going to do Secret Wars. I don't know, that's the
they've talked about maybe doing it.
Because I think they've reached the point, I guess,
where they have enough Hollywood juice where they could say
be like, I think Marvel's going in a bad way
or whatever. Or what they could do is make
three movies that nobody sees and then
we'll just do another Marvel one.
Or what they could do is they could be like
the thing about Marvel is we think they're getting a bit too formulaic,
so we put our foot down and we said,
we're not going to do any more Marvel movies until they let us, you know,
really elevate the form, and then we get into the Secret Wars
and it's just like, look how many guest stars there are.
Look how many Easter eggs and extra characters there are.
We tricked you.
We tricked you, you idiots.
That's what we do.
We're the Sneaky Russo Brothers.
Wow, they're sneaky now.
Yeah, yeah.
There you go.
Well, they were always sneaky.
That's true.
We didn't know.
We didn't know.
You're absolutely right.
Charlie Cox, actually, he also spoke to Radio Times about his role in Spider-Man
and the reveal, and I just thought this was quite funny,
so I'm going to include it, Mason.
He said, it's funny.
I got so many text messages and so many calls
about the moment in the cinema. My nephew
sent me a recording of everybody cheering so I
snuck into a movie theatre near where I
live and literally stood
in the corridor and sadly my experience
was dead fucking quiet. I was
so disappointed. My wife was with me
and she was recording me because it'd be
fun to have that moment of everyone cheering
and then tumbleweed.
I think that's very funny.
Yeah, that is very funny.
Because you're really probably only going to get that
like the first couple of days.
Oh, yeah.
People are like, we don't know who this is.
Yeah, exactly, the big fans or people will tell their friends
and they won't be joyously surprised in the cinema.
They'll go, oh, yeah, that's the thing they told us about.
Yeah, I mean I was like 99% sure he was going to be in it.
And I was still, you know, I was very excited to see him, Mason,
wasn't I?
I couldn't stop clapping and crying.
That's right.
I had to be escorted out.
So there you go.
That's fun.
Also, who was it?
His nephew, you said.
Nephew, yeah.
I reckon maybe his nephew, like, got a bunch of people in a room.
Oh, you think so?
No, people went mental when we were.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah.
But fun prank, though.
Fun prank.
Just get some friends in a room and record some whooping and cheering
and then send it to your uncle.
I love that.
Old Uncle Charlie.
Old Uncle Charlie.
Like Uncle Charlie, put your Daredevil costume on underneath your clothes
and then when there's the reveal, stand up in the cinema
and tear your shirt open Superman style and be like,
it's me, Daredevil.
I'm here and I'm on the screen.
Wear the mask the whole time.
Yeah.
Also speaking of Marvel, Netflix, all their stuff is coming
to Disney Plus Star on March 16th, which is about two weeks after it leaves Netflix.
All right.
But in the US, we don't know at this point.
Uh-oh.
Because they don't have Star.
They have Hulu.
They have Hulu.
Whereas most of other places in the world, including here,
don't have Hulu.
So all the Hulu stuff goes to Star.
Most of the Hulu stuff.
Sorry, yeah.
We get Solar Opposites.
Yep.
We get...
Oh, we get...
There's other shows. We get Dollface. That's a good show. Yeah, we get Dollface. We get Only Murders in this building. Yes. We get. Oh, we get. There's other shows.
We get Dollface.
That's a good show.
I like that one.
We get Only Murders in this building.
Yes.
What else do we have?
That's it.
I'm going to check.
We get Futurama.
You know, a bunch of Bob's Burgers stuff goes up there.
We get Bob's Burgers.
We get all of Always Sunny, I think.
That's right.
Oh, yeah, that went up there.
Anyway, good stuff.
So there you go.
It'll go somewhere in the US.
So if you do really want to see it, it'll turn up.
It'll show somewhere in the US. So if you do really want to see it, it'll turn up. It'll show its face.
I think our listeners are savvy enough to figure out how
to watch those Netflix shows.
You might be right.
Buy them from JB Hi-Fi and Blue Zip.
Exactly.
Can't get season three, I checked.
Is that still true?
Yeah.
That's weird.
It is weird.
There you go.
Last bit of news, Mason.
Okay.
You're going to love this.
I'm ready.
So deadline of reporting.
A couple of things.
Ooh, the French Dispatch is already on star.
Yes, it is.
I haven't watched that yet.
You mentioned up top the Oscars, right?
They dropped like eight categories.
Including editing.
Yeah, that they deemed irrelevant to put on television.
I think if I've learned anything through doing this podcast
and watching some truly atrocious movies,
it's that editing can make or break a movie.
Yeah.
You don't think about it a lot of the time. Because if it editing can make or break a movie. Yeah, I mean.
You don't think about it a lot of the time.
Because if it works, you don't notice it. Yeah.
Because it flows seamlessly.
I think like probably one of the most famous examples of that is Star Wars.
So Marsha Lucas, who was George Lucas' wife, she famously edited that
and probably fixed it.
Yeah.
Like made it watchable and made it really quick,
like made it really move.
But that to me is like, look, I don't watch the Oscars.
I don't care anyway.
It still seems mean.
It does seem mean.
But I think there's probably two categories of people
who watch any Oscars content and it's people who are like,
oh, I wonder if my favourite actor is going to win Best Actor
and then they watch the video on Twitter.
Or they're looking for a meme to get where they cut to the crowd
and somebody's doing a funny point or a laugh
and Pacino sitting there with sunglasses on is like, wow.
When you picture that, the person I pictured doing a funny point
and a laugh, it was DiCaprio and Jonah Hill sitting next to each other.
Yes.
Being like, eee!
Well, they watched The Mandalorian together, apparently.
Apparently Leonardo DiCaprio, they lived together during the pandemic
and Leonardo DiCaprio made Jonah Hill watch.
You'd think it would be the other way around, wouldn't you?
You'd think so, yeah.
There you go.
He's a big nerd.
Well, I'm pretty sure that DiCaprio was up for Anakin.
Oh, yeah, of course.
At one point.
Yeah, right.
And he probably wisely chose not to do it.
But anyway, my other thought was either you watch some snippets of it,
like after it's been announced and you go,
oh, who won the best actor or whatever.
Who did win?
DiCaprio.
Yeah.
For pointing and hooting.
The accusatory owl.
Yes.
There we go.
That's his most famous role.
Or you watch everything because you love everything.
Yeah, exactly.
And you want to watch the whole thing.
You don't want to watch it and be like, hey, what happened to editing?
How do you make people-
A movie, I don't know.
Yeah, great question.
Next question, though, if you don't know.
How do you make the Oscars interesting to a normal person?
Because we both watch movies.
Yes.
Professionally, I guess.
I mean, for a job of sorts, okay, I guess. We've tricked people into paying us money to watch movies. Yes. Professionally, I guess. I mean, for a job of sorts, okay, I guess.
We've tricked people into paying us money to watch movies.
It's not the same thing.
Yeah, that's right.
But we don't watch it.
No, I'd say generally not, no.
And I might skim the winner's list.
Yeah.
But, like, how do you get anybody to watch this?
What do you do?
I would, I think you'd have to put a narrative through it.
Like you'd have to... Like a
cringe narrative? A cringe narrative?
I don't know what that is. You know, like it's just a very
like, uncomfortable
like Star Wars holiday special.
Oh, you get Tim Robinson from
I Think You Should Leave to direct it.
I reckon you might have to put
sketches in and then link all the sketches together.
Okay. And then people would stick around
What if you did it like
More like the MTV Movie Awards
And the host is running late and he's running through Spider-Man
He's running through all the Spider-Man movies
But they won't
because they're too classy
I saw a comment, I think it was also from Deadline
that was like, this is some bullshit
like what's next, like best kiss or whatever
which is like, that's fine you. Like, what's next? Like, best kiss or whatever, which is like an –
also, like, that's fine.
You can have an award that's best kiss if you want.
Oh, that reminds me.
Speaking of that, I don't know if – I'm sure we mentioned it last week,
but the award that has been built solely to make Spider-Man No Way Home
win an Oscar is not winning No Way Home an Oscar.
Apparently it's Cinderella right now.
Yeah, okay.
So this is again from Deadline.
So it would be Zack Snyder's Justice League 100%, apparently.
It would win, right?
Oh, were it in the running.
It would have been counted, but it wasn't screened in cinemas.
Well, that's why Zack Snyder's Justice League trended on Twitter.
Exactly.
It's constantly trending, but yes.
So, yeah, you'd think it'd be Spider-Man No Way Home,
but no, it's Cinderella, which is a movie which everybody hates,
but it's also got, like, a big pop star in the lead, right?
Oh, with a lot of followers.
So this isn't a trick or a joke.
I think it could be both, though.
Okay, right.
I can't tell.
I don't know what's ironic anymore on the internet.
What's cringe?
I'm too old.
I don't know.
I've been left behind and I love it.
So, yeah, there you go.
What are you voting for, though, for this year's best Oscar of kiss?
The accusatory owl.
Is he kissing that owl?
Mrs. Owl.
Are they married?
Yes.
Good.
That's important to me, that the owls are married.
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You know, Mason, because we live in Australia,
a country which, by all accounts, is terrible,
it's one of those things where, like,
often you'll have to go into, like, an incognito mode
to find something, do you know what I mean?
I do.
But that often also doesn't work,
because that doesn't get around certain, like, global restrictions on the internet. Do you agree with I mean? I do. But that often also doesn't work. That doesn't get around certain
global restrictions on the internet.
Do you agree with that? You'd think it would because you're like,
that's Bill Wright and the Browns. This will be handy
for something. It's not. I can do this
in incognito
you'd think to yourself. I can look up some American
foods which, as you know, are illegal here.
That's right. Cheese whiz.
We don't have it. And it's illegal.
That's right. It's like getting a rocket launcher. You cannot do it. That's right. Cheezwhiz. We don't have it. And it's illegal. That's right. It's like getting a rocket launcher.
You cannot do it. That's right.
But listen, I know most of you listening are probably
thinking, look, why don't you just use incognito
mode if you're ever browsing anything? It seems like
a safe way to go about things. But let me tell you
something, Mason. Incognito mode,
as we alluded to just then,
this is an ad.
Does not hide your activity, does it, Mason?
This is an ad. I'm all for it.
It doesn't.
It's true.
Yeah, it doesn't matter what mode you use
or how many times you clear the browsing history.
Your internet service provider can still see every single website
you have ever visited.
That's why even when I'm at home and also when I'm at your home, Mason.
Excuse me?
I never go online without ExpressVPN.
It doesn't matter, again, what your internet service provider is.
ISPs in the US, for example, can legally sell your information
to ad companies.
ExpressVPN is an app that reroutes your internet connection
through the secure servers so your ISP can't see the sites you visit.
Cheesewhiz.com.
Don't tell anyone, though.
Express VPN also keeps all your information secure
by encrypting 100% of your data
with the most powerful encryption available.
And most of the time, you don't even realize that it's on
because, as I mentioned, Australia has...
Did I mention this now?
Look, I've said it before.
We have terrible internet.
So bad.
And terrible internet speed.
I'm not going to get into the specifics of it,
but the bloody government, et cetera, and so forth.
But when you put something like this on, you don't want it to
bottleneck everything that you're already doing.
And it doesn't do that.
The speed, it works the same.
It works seamlessly in the background and it's very easy to use.
All you do is tap one button and you are protected.
ExpressVPN is also, of course, available on all your devices,
phones, computers, and even your smart TV.
So there's no excuse, Mason, for you to not be using.
There's enough of your excuses.
I will not be accepting them.
No thank you.
One more excuse?
There will be no excuses.
Oh.
Actually, get this right.
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But we told you.
I'm going to look at so much cheese, Wiz.
I hope you do. But we told you. I'm going to look at so much cheese, Wiz. I hope you do.
Thanks.
Thank you.
Now, of course, we are going to be ranking some Batman
and Batman movies right about now.
But before that, I just wanted to say that we did take just a very minor break.
We do it to make sure that it's recording properly.
Yeah, we hit stop and then James took a big swig of his caffeinated beverage
and he went, I can get through this.
And I can.
Yeah, I know.
That's what I'm saying.
I'm saying positive reinforcement.
It sounded like mocking, but it's not.
I wasn't talking to anybody but myself.
Yeah.
It's like there was no one else in the room.
I didn't think I said it out loud.
But yeah, just before we get into this,
if you're over at BigSandwich.co,
which is our bonus subscription service with Patreon basically,
we did the long Halloween for a book club this week.
We sure did, yeah.
It led up to the Batman.
It's a great comic and I enjoyed talking about it.
Some of which is probably in the Batman probably kind of.
Who could say?
Me because I have seen it.
You have seen it.
Yes, that's right.
Just to clarify.
Okay, so what we're going to be doing here, we're going to go through every –
Are you hung over on like superiority?
Is that what you're really hung over?
You didn't go anywhere this weekend.
Sun really stings.
You know what I mean?
Who's the best golfer among your friends?
I don't care is the answer to that question.
That's what I thought.
That's what I thought.
I don't know and I don't care.
Yeah, right.
Who thinks they're the best?
I don't know.
Wow.
Wow.
It's me, actually.
I'm the best golfer.
Oh, that's why you never play.
Yeah, I never play.
Yeah. We also have that Batman 1966 commentary. That's true, that's why you never play. Yeah, never play.
We also have that Batman 1966 commentary.
That's true.
That's up there as well.
If you're hankering for Batman content pre-The Batman,
and you're like, what thematically is quite similar? What could I do?
Batman 1966 commentary.
What should I do with my time?
Anyways, like, go on.
No, I don't have anything.
Although you had a good joke.
Why would you think that?
I don't know, sometimes.
Yeah, sometimes it's true.
Look, I think we do a bit in the commentary about how I would love
if Robert Pattinson's Batman just has the giant bat-themed gadgets
that the 60s had.
Oh, absolutely.
Like he's at the Grizzly crime scene.
He's got just an enormous box camera with a big raw flashbulb.
It's got a big bat silhouette around it.
It says bat evidence
camera on it.
So, look,
in this ranking, there's someone
not really going to touch upon either intentionally
or unintentionally. Oh, wow. Like, for example,
Bruce Wayne is in the first
Suicide Squad movie. That's true.
It barely counts. There's that serial from the 70s or whatever. Oh, not 70s, from like the first Suicide Squad movie. That's true. It barely counts.
There's that serial from the 70s or whatever.
Not 70s, from like the 40s.
Bat flakes.
Whatever.
We're not doing that.
I haven't seen it and we're not doing it.
So we're basically going to go 66 upwards.
This is all, I think so at least, the cinematic releases
including some of the animated stuff.
This is very scientific also.
It's also very.
We're going to rank them on gadgets.
Yep.
How good the Bruce Wayne is.
Yep.
At any point do they hang upside down from weird ankle shackles.
Yep.
And sleep like a bat or whatever.
Hair.
Hair.
That's important.
Wigs.
Wigs as well.
Wow, that's interesting.
And how about this?
And also, how close are they to the comic book of the time?
Yeah, I think like what we're really looking at looking at here is not only is this a good movie,
but is this a good Batman?
Because it could be a bad Batman, but a good movie.
And we're going to rank them on your computer device here.
That's right.
So first up we've got Batman 1966.
Well, it's number one with a bullet so far.
I agree.
But I would also say, well, also 70, I've got some Rotten Tomatoes scores here.
That's 79%, so very positive.
Of course, we did recently rewatch it and we talked about it in depth there.
But what I've always liked about this, and I'll never stop saying it,
it's just Batman.
Yeah.
Like he's a silly man in a silly universe.
It's very accurate.
It's accurate villains and costumes and it's set,
maybe not necessarily the tone, but the idea of what this person is about.
Sure, yeah.
And the reason I think why the 89 one was successful
was because everybody grew up on that one and then, you know,
20-odd years later he's back and he's real and you're grown up
and he's grown up, you know.
Yeah.
And I think, I don't know, what do you think?
And now he's even more grown up.
Exactly.
In The Flash he's going to be even more grown up.
What do you think though?
I'm loving the Batman.
It was, I mean, this was sort of, we're right in the cusp of,
like, in the comics, like, silly Batman ears.
Yeah.
Because kind of the Comics Code Authority didn't allow him to,
you know, there wasn't really any murders or anything
in the Batman books at that time.
Well, there was in this movie, though.
Oh, yeah.
All those men got murdered.
All those men got murdered. All those men got murdered.
All those sailors got murdered.
Deradicated men or whatever.
Yeah, so instead of being like, you know, violent criminals,
it was just silly bank robberies and stuff.
So that's pretty accurate.
Also, pretty good stunts, as we've talked about.
Like, in flight sequences, very, like, physical
and for the time very well choreographed
and just swinging about and jumping and punching.
Yeah.
The other thing is about this show, I was going to ask you
about the Comics Code Authority.
Do you think that did Batman a good in this?
Not obviously at the time because it was like you're changing
what people can read.
That's true.
But do you think that actually made people get more creative
in interesting ways and allowed?
No.
No, I think for the comics industry generally,
I think it might have been a positive just because they were like,
well, we can't get grislier, we have to get weirder.
Yeah.
But that didn't, I don't think, I think there is actually a comic tropes video on Batman in this era.
Okay.
Where he didn't, it was just sort of,
it felt just like a watered-down Superman.
Yeah.
Because Superman was always visiting alien planets and meeting interesting aliens,
but also he was Superman, so that kind of made sense.
But for Batman, he was always being zapped off to an alien planet,
and it's like, oh, regular man.
Regular man, what's he doing here?
He doesn't know.
He doesn't know what he's doing.
Okay.
Well, anyway, regardless, Batman 66, number one.
Number one with a bullet.
It's just a good movie.
I would argue a very good movie even.
It's fun, right?
Yes.
It's really fun.
And also, I'm sure we talked about this in the commentary,
but I think we both went through phases where we're like,
this is dumb, this is silly.
But it's like it's supposed to be.
It's very well aware of what it is.
I think maybe people, including me,
lost sight of that at one point.
Do you know what I mean?
To be like, they don't even realise how dumb this is.
No, they made it like this.
It's intentional.
I think there are probably movies further up the ladder here
where they didn't realise how dumb it was.
You might be right.
But of course, and also a good Bruce Wayne.
Yeah. But he never hangs upside down also a good Bruce Wayne. Yeah.
But he never hangs upside down.
Yeah.
He's got all sorts of ridiculous gadgets, so.
I would also say.
Also, he's got the car.
Yep.
He's got the helicopter.
Yep.
He's got the boats.
Well, we talk about it again in the commentary.
Motorbike.
The way that they took advantage of a movie budget.
Yeah.
And we'll talk about it in very interesting ways in that,
which will, again, if you want to listen to it, you can.
This is going to be tough, though, because this next one,
Batman 1989, came out in 1972.
I don't know if we mentioned this.
Wait, what?
Sorry, it came in at 72% on Tomatoes.
Jesus, yeah.
Batman 89 came out in 1972.
But I don't know if I mentioned this, but Adam West was annoyed
that they didn't ask him to come back to play Batman.
But anyway, this is like a very formative comic book movie.
Yes.
You know, I like it.
It's a good movie.
You obviously, it blew your mind as a child.
Big fan, yeah.
And you'll never get over it.
I'll never get over it, no.
But.
Go on.
Is it a good Batman movie and man?
I think in the main it is a good Batman.
Yeah.
I mean, aesthetically there was a redesign of Batman.
Yeah.
But then, you know, from grey and blue to the all black suit,
which then sort of bled back into the comic books.
Yeah.
But I think this was good for Batman in the comic books as well.
Yeah.
I think everything got and remains a more Gotham.
I think the idea of Gotham City as a character came from this.
You might be right.
Well, I mean, you know, that idea has waxed and waned and, you know,
waned over the years with, you know, big novelty things in Gotham City.
But I think the idea of Gotham City being an absolute nightmare horror world,
I think kind of sprang from this.
And when you see like present-day Batman comics
and you look at Gotham City, you go,
or the Arkham games or anything like that,
you go, that came from this.
Absolutely.
Yeah, you see a lot of that.
And specifically, he invented the grapple gun for Batman.
That's right.
I also think it's silly in a way that,
like it is silly.
It's a silly movie also.
It is a silly movie, yeah.
It's just got a different colour palette.
And the tone is obviously different than the 66,
but it's still a very silly movie.
How's the Bruce Wayne?
Yeah, I like him a lot.
I think, look, I also, like he doesn't,
it wouldn't be like traditionally the Bruce Wayne
that you would picture in your mind.
I think he's a worse Bruce Wayne than 66 Bruce Wayne.
Yeah, I'd agree with that.
Just because he's just like.
He's not that interesting.
Oh, hey, what are you, you know,
there's a scene where they meet Bruce Wayne.
He's like, hey, what are you?
What are you guys up to?
What are you hanging out?
Oh, this is a fun room.
I've never been in this room.
Yeah.
I think also he's not given as much as he should have in those movies
because it's all about Joker and we'll talk about the next one as well.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
In order, it's about the villains, then Batman as the action hero,
and then a little bit of Bruce Wayne somewhere in there.
But, I mean, he's great and I'm really glad he's coming back.
But here's a question, I guess.
And he hangs upside down.
And he hangs upside down and whatever.
I like his little glasses.
Also, where does it fit?
Is it behind Batman 66?
No, I think it's above Batman 66.
Okay.
Well, I guess we have to agree, don't we?
We have to agree.
All right.
Otherwise, we hit a stalemate.
We just keep recording.
God.
It's silence until we get there.
See, I would probably, if it was just me, I'd put 66 above it.
I'm not going to.
And you hung over.
And you don't want to argue.
I will not fight it.
Yeah, right.
Why do you say that, though?
I can't think of a good reason, but I think in terms of being formative and how accurate
the original one is.
I think, and again, like the Bruce Wayne thing you mentioned. Yeah. That is why. And again, the Bruce Wayne thing you mentioned.
That is why. And also, if I wanted to watch one,
then again, if I wanted to watch one,
I'd probably watch 89.
If I had to pick one to watch.
It's fun. And he's got the jet
and it goes out to the moon.
It goes out to the moon.
It's such a weird movie, though, as well.
And he's a big murderer.
And he's killing people on his way up that bell tower
and he's shooting Joker
with his chain guns.
It's not that accurate.
It's not that accurate.
No, not at all.
Again, I did mention
that it sort of, you know,
it bled into the comic books
but maybe not in a good way.
But I'm still putting it up there.
Yeah, no, I agree.
Because not everything
has to be 100% accurate
and whatever.
A lot of this is a vibe, you know.
I love vibes actually.
Yeah, it's good, isn't it?
Not right now.
Not feeling much of anything. But anyway, let's do I love vibes, actually. Yeah, it's good, isn't it? Not right now. Not feeling much of anything.
But anyway, let's do Batman Returns from 1992.
It's worse than these two.
Agreed.
But let's break down why.
It also came in at 80%.
Oh, so higher than...
Higher, which really surprised me.
Also, like, famously dark.
Oh, you know why it probably has that?
Yeah.
Probably because of more reviewers.
That's probably true also.
I would imagine
most movie outlets at the time
were like, we're not reviewing Batman.
It's going to sink like a stone, this thing.
You might be right.
I nearly did a song there.
I said, I was going to do a thing
but I didn't mean to do it and I will not be doing it.
Because the option
is still here for you if you want to do it.
No, no.
No.
So it famously it. Because the chances, the option is still here for you if you want to do it. No, no. Actually, the moment has passed.
So,
yeah, so it famously, like,
it got a bunch of Happy Meal toys pulled or whatever, like, because it was marketed
as a kid's movie and it's clearly not.
At the end, Batman kills a horrible little penguin
man who throws up black bile and
dies. Not through the actions
of Batman directly. Oh, no, he
sends a bunch of bats on him.
But then he just gets back up.
Yeah, and then Catwoman electrocutes him to death.
No, no, no.
Oh, no, Catwoman electrocutes Christopher Walken to death.
Then Penguin just dies.
Oh, yeah, he does, doesn't he?
I think it's also, you know the problem with this movie as well.
What's that?
Batman's not fucking in it.
He's barely in it.
Yeah.
And it's about a weird mayoral race.
Yeah. And he bites a guy's nose. It's a weird about a weird mayoral race. Yeah.
And he bites a guy's nose.
It's a weird fairy tale involving a mutant child.
Yeah.
Let's put it at the bottom.
I've got a video up at the moment on Batman theories.
And one of the theories I nearly put in when I was hunting around was,
for this movie, is that the penguin in this is actually Killer Croc.
Because he's kind of this horrible, like he's eating raw fish.
Yeah, right.
He's really vicious.
Yeah, because this penguin isn't just a small man.
No.
With some trick umbrellas.
He is a mutant creature of some sort.
With flipper hands and whatever.
Yeah.
Tim Burton really loves these like freaks, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
And that's kind of what he seems to identify with and what he finds most interesting.
And Batman suffers in this movie as well.
But also he gets the Joker's goons really because he gets a bunch of clowns.
Yeah, he gets the circus boys or whatever.
Yeah.
The red something, something.
Gadget-wise, how do you feel about it?
Yeah, cool.
I mean there's that Batarang that's got a screen on it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, the screen Batarang.
What else is in this one?
Well, he's got the classic.
He didn't have it in the previous movie.
He's got the glider cape where it pops out. Yeah, see, that's one of those things where I'm like I just thought that was in both, but it got the classic. He didn't have it in the previous movie. He's got the glider cape where it pops out.
Yeah, see, that's one of those things where I'm like,
I just thought that was in both, but it's obviously not.
Did you know in the, I think it's the first Arkham game,
if you pirated it, it would disable the gliding function of your cape
so you wouldn't.
You got to a room and then you couldn't.
Couldn't escape it, yeah.
Couldn't escape it, yeah.
It's got the Batmobile where the sides of the Batmobile explode off
and it's just a rocket.
Remember that one?
Oh, yeah.
Just for getting through narrow passageways in the city.
That's so strange because like.
Too specific if you ask me.
That and like the Nolan one does it.
Oh, yeah.
I don't know whether that's a coincidence or a homage or whatever.
I reckon Nolan would say it's completely original.
It's just a coincidence.
Actually, I invented this.
I actually invented the, this is an English motorcycle.
I actually had never heard of Batman before that
and still have not heard of him now.
He does have that vibe.
Yeah.
And he's also got the, like the Batmobile has the big thing
in the middle of it.
It's got a big lift in it.
Yeah.
Like a vehicle lift and it turns it around and then of it. It's got a big lift in it. Yeah. Like a vehicle lift.
And it turns it around and then he kills a,
he kills a clan with that exhaust.
I can't believe that clan just stands there and lets that happen.
All right.
Yeah.
Also it's got the,
no,
was it the first one's got the shield?
It's the first one,
right?
Yeah.
And the bombs.
The second one has a more updated shield.
Yeah. And that's good.
I also think the costume though in two is really good.
I think the costume in one is better.
Yeah.
I disagree.
I don't know.
There's something,
it's more art deco and line. Yeah, I guess. Yeah don't know. There's something. It's more art deco and line.
Yeah, I guess.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The cow looks better.
I just think it's awesome, that costume.
But again, he's not in it.
He's not in that movie.
But Catwoman's great, you know?
Yeah.
That's cool.
And maybe as someone who's covering that for Cave in the Garbage soon,
better than another version of Catwoman that we've seen at some point.
Isn't that true, Mason?
That's right.
That's the Anne Hathaway version. That's probably Mason? That's right, the Anne Hathaway version.
That's probably true even.
I like the Anne Hathaway version.
Next up we've got, in 1993, coming in at 84% Rotten Tomato,
Batman Mask of the Phantasm, a continuation, of course,
of Winter Cinema's continuation of the series, Sunk Like a Stone.
Nobody saw it.
That's true.
But it's very good.
It is very good.
Speaking of Bruce Wayne, it's a great Bruce
Wayne in that. I'm glad he gets a look
in, Kevin Conroy, in this. Yeah.
And he has like an existential
crisis because he goes to
his parents' grave and he's like, ah, I didn't think
I'd ever be happy. Sorry, can't
fight crime anymore because I'm happy maybe. I'm not going to do
it. I hope there's not a big phantasm
that comes and maybe does something that
I don't like. That's some good Bruce Wayne-ing as far as I'm concerned.
That puts it in the upper echelon, I think.
I mean, Batman, the animated series, is incredible.
And this is like a good version of that.
Again, like nobody saw it.
Does he have any good fun novelty gadgets or does he just have the basics?
I honestly couldn't tell you.
Like I haven't seen it in a long time.
I'm trying to work out.
The box office had made $5.6 million.
So, yeah, again, nobody saw it.
That's low.
And they probably shouldn't have released it to cinemas.
But the budget was $6 million and I would say by now it would more than
definitely would have made money back then.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because it existed in an era of DVD sales.
It also introduced a new villain.
The Phantasm.
Is that right?
Yes.
The first appearance.
Phantasm is true.
Yeah, cool.
All right.
Well, what do you reckon?
Where do we put that?
I would say it's below 89.
Okay.
I don't know why.
Okay.
It's just a vibe.
Yeah, but is it better than 66?
Today, yes, it is.
Yeah, all right.
I don't like doing that to 66.
I know.
But I feel like we're selling it short.
Anyway, check out Mask of the Phantasm and no other movies.
That's right. Maybe check out Bullets. Anyway, check out Mask of the Phantasm and no other movies. That's right.
Maybe check out Bullets.
Oh, yeah.
Or wait for the remake.
It's not a remake.
Yeah, wait for it though.
It'll basically be a remake but it won't be a remake.
It'll be a remake.
So Batman Forever then came out in 1995, 39% Rotten Tomatoes.
It starts to get more campy and silly.
You got to Jim Carrey's River.
You got Thomas Lee Jones doing Jack Nicholson's Joker,
but not as good.
I like Jim Carrey in this, even though he's not doing the Riddler
so much as he's doing Ace Ventura.
But I guess there's some Frank Gorsham in it,
like the design specifically.
I feel like this Batman, this one is in an uncomfortable position
of not being as camp as it could be.
Yeah.
Like it's in a weird transitory phase.
It is.
It's between Burton and –
Like even as an adult going, you know, we're attempting just campy fun.
Yeah.
This one doesn't work for me.
I prefer – any day of the week I prefer Batman and Robin, honestly.
See, I think that this one is better at doing Batman than Batman Returns is.
Okay.
But I don't know whether it's a better movie.
Also, I haven't seen Batman forever and forever.
But I also think Val Kilmer, he looks great as Batman.
I think he's probably, like, one of the most comic accurate.
Does he look great as Bruce Wayne?
No, yes, definitely, definitely.
You don't think?
He's got the Bale kind of Bruce Wayne-ness.
Yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Which I like.
I'm going to have a quick squiz at him right now.
And he wears little glasses as well and I love it.
No, that's true.
He wears a little glasses.
That's the continuity from the Michael Caden one, yeah.
I mean, I know he has the, he's got the return suit
and then he transitions into the forever suit towards the end.
It also introduces a Robin.
Yep. Which not a a Robin. Yep.
Which not a lot of these do.
Actually, a lot of these do.
Look at this list.
Look, honestly, I'm not loving the Val Kilmer Bruce Wayne.
The bat suit, yes.
What don't you like about it?
He's too blonde.
He can be blonde.
I mean, he's a brunette, but he looks too blonde.
He looks like a blonde.
He looks like a blonde.
Yeah.
And he's got the turtleneck and the little glasses. That's what
Keaton did.
It's the haircut, I think. Do you think maybe
if he took on too much of Keaton's
look and identity when he should have
maybe crafted a persona
and look around Kilmer? Correct.
Nailed it. Because I know also, like,
Kilmer... Should have given him black hair also.
Yeah, okay. Well, that's what they did to Pattinson in the new
one as well. But what was I going to say?
I know Kilmer was like, I think, I remember him talking about how
he didn't really get to do anything with it.
Yeah, right.
He's an incredible actor and he'd done like at this point
a bunch of shit, but like Tombstone, for example.
Yeah, yeah.
Where he does this amazing performance as Doc Holliday
and he's just kind of there in this, you know?
So, yeah.
I mean, there is that, you know. So, yeah. Well, let's. I mean, they do.
I mean, there is that, you know, there's the element of like,
do they do the element of like the love interest is in love
with Bruce Wayne and Batman?
Maybe.
Who is it?
It's Nicole Kidman.
It's Nicole Kidman, yeah.
Yeah, I don't know.
I'm going to put this below.
He's got a lot of neon stuff though, doesn't he?
There is a lot of neon stuff and there's some big sort of trap set pieces. There's that big
isn't there right at the start, there's the scene
where Two-Face's, he's got the
bank vault on a helicopter. Oh, that's true, that's really
cool. And it's filling with acid maybe?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then there's the scene at the end
where the Riddler's trapped. Yeah.
Robin and Nicole Kidman,
the actor Nicole Kidman, in two separate
things. Yep. And he has to use his
Oh, there's a bit at the end when Two-Face is like,
I'm going to shoot Robin.
And Batman's like, if you kill Two-Face,
then you'll never, you'll always carry hate.
And Batman just kills him.
Anyway, have those coins.
So there's a fistful of coins in him and then he falls to his death
and he just watches it happen.
Yeah, so that's cool.
That is cool.
Also, he drives a Batmobile up a wall, and is that not cool?
Isn't that Batman? Oh no, that is Batman
Forever. It could be any of them. It's Batman Forever.
It could be Christopher Nolan's Batman. It's true, yeah.
The Dark Knight. Alright, I guess, I think the
question here is, is this better than Batman?
It's also got Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me
and Seal's Kiss From A Rose. Oh my
God, I was ready to make a
summary declaration there, but then
you threw in Seal kissed from a rose.
Okay, where does it sit, though?
I think I would rather watch Batman 66 than this movie.
I agree.
So it's below that.
Is it better than Batman Returns?
Yeah, that was my question.
It's probably not.
Also, I haven't seen it recently, so I honestly don't know.
But probably not, right?
I think it's below Batman Returns.
We'll put it in.
That's subject to change when we do this again.
We forget we did it and we do it again.
We'll do it in another entire episode and they'll come out either very similar
or completely different.
That's right.
Next up, of course, at $19.97 and coming in at 12% on Rotten Tomatoes
is Batman and Robin.
I mean, yeah, it sucks.
But boy, what a ride.
It's very interesting.
It is interesting.
But like what a terrible Mr. Freeze like suit and all.
Really?
You think so?
Yeah, that suit is atrocious.
But what about when he's wearing his little robe?
Oh, 100%.
I'm there for that all day.
But just like, it's like, I don't know,
he looks like a rejected He-Man action figure.
I know.
And it's just.
Because you prefer the skinny scientist version.
I'd love to see.
Oh, just something that, I don't know.
Yeah.
He doesn't have to be skinny because he's been big.
And I'll tell you this.
I hate the Robin suit in this.
I hated the previous one as well.
Yeah, right.
Because they never –
Also, he's 27.
He is 27.
He's exactly the same height as Batman.
Yeah.
But they never do, in my opinion, a real proper Robin suit.
Yeah.
You've seen the Titans Robin suit?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's amazing.
Yeah.
But they went – What they did is they did a sort of half-assed Robin suit in Batman
forever and then they switched entirely to basically a Nightwing suit
for Batman and Robin even though he's still Robin.
But they're having that conversation about, you know.
And I think it's too soon.
I don't like either of them.
Yeah.
I think one of the things that movie does do well in terms of Robin is.
Robin who's a full grown man who's the same size as Batman.
But that him and Batman are having a falling out.
Oh yeah.
And you're like oh this is going towards Nightwing and then they don't do it.
And then they just patch it up at the end.
And they're like nah we're friends.
But again is this more campy than.
I feel this is way more campy than Batman Forever, but I think it's maybe because I haven't seen
Batman Forever and I need Forever.
Well, again, to spoil the theory video that I've got out,
one of the theories is the reason why it's so campy is because
the Riddler used that machine to break everyone's brain in Gotham.
Oh, so he's gone insane.
And so the next movie runs around and everybody's just really fucked up,
like just loopy because he invaded their mind.
But look, Clooney, if you gave him the right movie,
he would be an amazing Bruce Wayne.
I agree.
But this is not it.
No, absolutely not.
He's not very good.
But I think it's better than Batman Forever.
Yeah, I think it's more entertaining.
I don't know if it's better.
Yeah.
But, yeah, I agree.
It's probably better than Batman Forever.
It does.
And if we're talking, I think better Bruce Wayne personally.
Yeah. I also think better gadgets because better than Batman Forever. He does. And if we're talking gadgets, I think better Bruce Wayne personally.
Yeah.
I also think better gadgets because he's got the bat credit card.
Does it have better fake rubber lips?
Who had fake rubber lips?
Robin.
He kisses Poison Ivy and then he's wearing rubber lips.
Yeah, all right.
Yeah, it does then.
Yes.
It does. That's a good gadget.
Yeah.
Just the idea of like a domino mask.
And I know that's Robin in general.
Yeah.
But let's, come on on what do we do it
here right and he's the bat credit card yeah yep and batman forever is the one where he goes i'll
get drive-through right yes it is how does he get that drive-through that enormous vehicle i don't
know yeah there might be one like gotham city mcdonald's slash hungry jacks yes where where
it's wide enough you mean no no in gotham it's wide enough. Burger King, you mean.
No, no, in Gotham City.
In Gotham it's Hungry Jack's.
It's Hungry Jack's, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cool.
Excellent.
So we're putting that above Batman Forever.
But sometimes there's a big line at the Hungry Jack's,
the one Hungry Jack's that's wide enough for his car.
Yes.
So he just smashes the whole thing down.
Is it better, and I know the answer to this,
but it's not obviously, you wouldn't put it above Batman Returns.
No.
But I also don't think that, I don't think it's a mistake.
No.
As in like they accidentally did this silly thing.
I think like 66, it's supposed to be like this.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
And that's good.
I agree.
But it's not a good movie.
No.
Let's revisit it in another 20 years.
I agree.
God, what else happens in that movie? Boy, Bane's in it for two seconds. Yeah, Bane's revisit it in another 20 years. I agree. God, what else happens in that movie?
Boy, Bane's in it for two seconds.
Yeah, Bane's in it.
Fuck, I forgot that.
Bad Bane.
That's a terrible Bane.
No, I can't put it up for that alone.
Then we're going to jump ahead eight years.
Okay.
Which this felt like a million years apart though.
In 2005, coming in at 84%, we got Batman Begins.
Which we recently talked about on Caravan of Garbage, obviously, extensively.
Oh, yeah, we did.
We covered the entire saga.
We should have.
We're wrapping up this week.
We're doing part five of the Nolan saga.
That's right, yeah.
That's interesting.
I can't believe that there was eight years between these movies.
Like, just Batman Begins is fucking amazing.
I agree, yeah.
It might be the best of the Nolan ones also.
Maybe.
We'll have to do an actual rewatch, I think.
Yeah, I think so.
But I think if you took out Heath Ledger from The Dark Knight,
which is like, yeah, just take out a really integral element
to that amazing movie, then Batman Begins is better.
But I don't know.
I mean, what I loved about it was the origin as well.
Yeah, it's, you know, in the Batman universe,
in the comic books, we'd only ever seen snippets of that.
And, you know, going into this, people were like,
oh, this is going to be Batman Year One.
Yeah.
But Batman Year One, the comic book starts,
he's already arriving back in Gotham.
He's done his training.
But this we see before that.
Yeah.
So it's kind of original content.
Yeah.
But it's not bad somehow.
I agree.
And I just love that muddy brawl that he has in the prison,
and he's just kicking out knees.
I just think that's such a good scene.
Now gadget-wise, what are we doing?
We've seen the origin of a lot of gadgets.
Yeah, I mean it's a lot of trying to make sense of this dumb shit,
and there's a lot of like the cloak I like where you run a current through it
and it doesn't make any sense but you'd sink like a stone.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Crash like a stone.
You'd fly like a big stone.
You'd fly like an eagle to the sea.
That's right.
A little bit of seal for you there.
Seal's a seal joke for you, everybody.
It's not a joke, James.
I love seal.
I love, do you see the
you've seen Popstar Never Stop
our Seal's in that
and there's a moment where he explains that he got
his scar because he was attacked by wolves.
Right.
Anyway, what are we doing?
Okay. Bale's a great
Bruce Wayne.
Yes. He's Batman is kind of
ridiculous though. Oh yeah, for sure.
The voice, you know?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Look, I think the – like we've got the Tumblr obviously,
but vehicles-wise.
You don't like the Tumblr, do you?
I don't like it, no.
Yeah.
It's not batty enough.
We didn't talk about that weird insane like hyper-color core
from the previous movie.
No, we didn't.
That's true.
But it's in it.
Because everybody imagined it in their minds.
We didn't have to. Yeah. But you don't – I Because everybody imagined it in their minds. We didn't have to.
I see. I like the
I mean, it doesn't really make sense, but the
supposed practicality of
the Tumblr, where if you're chasing
people or you're trying to escape or
you're leaping rooftops, then you would just need a tank.
Sure. And often Batman also
in the comics, he has a tank.
But it also looks like weird geometry.
It doesn't look like nothing very bat about it.
I mean, it's not as bad as the bat in a later movie.
No, that's true.
Look, yeah.
But I mean, excellent, excellent, excellent Bruce Wayne, I think,
is what we get here.
And we get the duality of, like, fake Bruce Wayne,
who's like the CEO Bruce Wayne who's falling asleep in meetings,
and we get real Bruce Wayne.
I love that Bruce Wayne.
He's like, oh, I'm sad.
I love that Bruce Wayne of like he's happy for everybody
to think he's a moron.
He just doesn't care.
Like he'll just be like, yeah, I'm drunk publicly.
Yeah, I burnt down my house.
He doesn't care because he's just so removed from like, you know,
from any of that.
He just doesn't give a shit.
Yeah.
We didn't even rank.
James, we forgot to rank the Bat Caves.
That's true.
Yeah, that's a good point.
Let's do it really quickly.
The original one, 66.
Great.
Fun, good.
Yep.
Bright.
89, loved it.
Loved the redesign.
Also, if I'm in that Bat Cave in 66,
I know exactly what I'm looking for.
Because everything's labeled.
You know what I mean?
That's true, yeah.
You know what I'm doing.
Yeah, yeah.
89, I'm like, this is confusing,
and I'm going to trip into a pit.
Yo, you're definitely going to die in that back. But it's all over. Yeah, yeah. 89, I'm like, this is confusing and I'm going to trip into a pit.
Oh, you're definitely going to die in that back.
But it's all over the place.
All the 89, they're pretty good.
But where's like the big coin?
Where's the dinosaur? Yeah, there should have been a big coin.
Where's that in any of this, I guess?
Yeah.
And this one?
What about the, do you want to know if Forever and Batman are on it?
Whatever.
Neon, whatever.
A lot of neon, I would imagine.
I don't actually remember. No, neither do I. Oh, Alfred's on a whatever. Neon whatever. A lot of neon I would imagine. I don't actually remember.
No, neither do I.
Oh, Alfred's on a computer.
Oh, yeah.
Alicia Silverstone's in one of those caves.
Whoa, yeah.
That's pretty good.
Yeah.
Anyway, sorry.
But the Dark Knight one.
Well, the Dark Knight.
Sorry, the Batman Begins one.
You like the cave?
I can't remember.
I don't think it's very good.
It's just a cave.
Yeah, it's just a cave.
I don't, yeah, no.
He spelunks into it.
It's got a computer.
Yeah.
What else is it?
That's it. God, I wish I knew more. You know what I mean? Sure, yeah. I don't, yeah, no. He spelunks into it. It's got a computer. Yeah. What else is it? That's it.
God, I wish I knew more.
You know what I mean?
Sure, yeah.
I wish we recently did them for something so we could talk about them.
But we didn't.
We chose to do a big joke instead.
We did a big prank.
It was good for everyone.
Everybody, big laugh.
Yeah.
I like Ra's al Ghul.
Again, all that League of Shadows shit is good.
I like the scarecrow.
I like the mob boss element of it as well.
Oh, true, yeah.
I think that's all good stuff.
Which is the one where he gets,
he throws one of the mob bosses out the window
and breaks their legs?
Is that this one?
Yeah, he drops them off the building, does he?
Yeah, yeah.
Is that this one?
No, that's Eric Roberts.
That's two.
That is two, okay, right.
This is the one, though, that doesn't,
like he really sticks, commits to that voice,
though, doesn't he?
Yeah.
And Rachel is in it, but then.
Rachel!
Rachel!
Rachel! Okay! Rachel!
Okay, where are we ranking Batman Begins?
Oh, we haven't really done this, but probably my favourite Gordon.
Yeah, okay.
Yep, you're right.
It's the best of the.
Obviously I'm excluding anything recently.
Yeah, he's a good.
He's a good.
There's not enough J.K. Simmons for me.
No, but I mean that's the Gordon we've had since the 80s at least.
Yeah.
Like the mustache and the matted down hair and the glasses
and the dirty trench coat, that kind of like grizzled detective
and he's the commissioner but he's still grizzled, you know.
You know what I think is also good about this one as opposed
to even The Dark Knight, the city feels more like deliberately crafted where The Dark Knight is like,
we did this in Chicago.
You're right.
We know.
We can tell.
Yeah.
You know, big wide streets.
Yeah, yeah.
It's like.
That's the Chicago Bears.
They're all walking down the street.
Do you know what I mean though?
Yeah.
There's not a lot of kind of Gotham character in the other two.
I think there is in this and it's probably because you see like the narrows
and all of that and you'd see like weird facilities and, you know,
whatever, whatever.
Okay, where's this going?
This might be the best one so far, I think.
Yeah, I think you probably.
He's also a big murderer.
He's a big murderer.
But I mean, you know, they're all big murderers.
I'd put it above 89.
Yeah, let's put it above 89.
All right, here we go then.
This is about to heat up.
Oh, and this is the one that's going to,
oh, James, we're going to get hate mail for this.
Good, I embrace it.
The Dark Knight.
The Dark Knight, 2008, 94% Rotten Tomatoes.
Yeah.
Everybody tried to make their own The Dark Knight.
I sure did.
Some did better than others.
Yep.
All right, how's the Batman in this first?
I love this suit.
I know you don't like it though.
Don't I? I don't suit. I know you don't like it, though. Don't I?
I don't know.
Do you like it?
If I recall, the thing that I don't like about the Bale Batman suit
is the weird contrast between the cowl and the cape.
Yes.
Because the cape is very matte.
You know what else I don't like about this?
Go on.
It doesn't let his chin show.
It just shows this part of his mouth.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, okay, you're right.
I think the cowl needs work.
I mean, obviously. But I like the movement of it. Yeah. With this one and the next one, okay, you're right. I think the cow needs work. I mean, obviously.
But I like the movement of it.
Yeah.
With this one and the next one, again, we're still going to get,
well, actually, no, there's a big change with the next one,
but this one we're still going to get Batman.
He's a playboy, but also.
There's a big change with the next one. Well, he's stuck at home with a bum leg.
Oh, yeah.
I thought you meant the suit.
Oh, no, no, no.
I meant the Bruce suit.
Yeah.
And I think also you don't like the Batpod.
Is that true?
I don't like the Batpod.
Why would it be in there?
Why would it be in there?
Maybe he put it in.
Maybe he put it in there.
No.
You don't think he did?
I mean, whether he did or he didn't.
Why is it there regardless?
Right, yep.
Because in case it did a big crash.
The military wouldn't have put it in there.
Yeah.
So he must have done it.
Yeah.
Did he invent it?
I don't know.
Where did it come from?
I don't know. Lucius Fox come from? I don't know.
Lucius Fox?
Lucius Fox probably did it.
Does he make weird gyroscopically stabilized motorbikes on his off hours?
Did he do that?
And then Bruce Wayne's like, I have one of those.
Remember the bit where it goes.
No, this is my invention.
I'm going to make a billion dollars.
No, no, I want it.
Dude, remember.
You made it on Wayne Company time.
I own it now.
What about the bit where he goes up the wall?
And he goes.
Or when it goes around a corner in the wheel fucking.
Seems more of a Robin thing to do.
I fucking love it.
I think it's great.
You would.
And it's really unique.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Bat cave.
And the cape out the back as he's going.
Again, Robin's in that role, man.
Yeah, but he.
You saved the bat pod for Robin.
It's the rob pod.
The rob pod.
Okay.
Bat cave.
Garbage.
Not a real bat cave.
Just a wet hole in the wall.
Just a weird hotel lobby underground.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
I was thinking of the first one.
You're right, because the first one burned down or whatever.
But, yeah, it's in a shipping container.
It's a shipping container.
It's a big white room.
Yeah. That's, yeah. I think they use it for in a shipping container. It's a shipping container. It's a big white room. Yeah.
That's, yeah.
I think they use it for hip hop videos now as well, that space.
No doubt.
But I would also say that that is not supposed to be the Batcave.
I know.
So why stick around for so long?
Why give us two more movies of that?
Because he burnt, no, he didn't.
Does he have it in the next one?
I can't remember.
Because he lets John Blake into the Batcave in the next one.
Isn't that a new place, though?
It might be.
That's a new destination.
On a big elevator.
Yeah.
It gives him a big elevator ride.
That's true.
Yeah.
Anyway, it's a very good movie, isn't it?
Heath Ledger's in it.
Yeah.
Everybody's just being –
I might rank this at the top for Heath Ledger's performance alone,
if I'm honest.
Yeah, they're trying to –
like a lot of people are trying to capture that Joker magic,
you know what I mean?
Yeah.
I'm talking about Jared Leto specifically.
Yeah, yeah.
But it also, I think, gave rise to-
And Mac and Phoenix.
Yes, but I think he did it obviously better,
even though I don't love that movie.
And we're not doing that one because-
We're not doing it, yeah.
I guess, yeah.
That's right.
But it's at the bottom.
What do you think of that?
Whoa.
That's all right.
Anyway, I mean, Heath Ledger, yeah, it's incredible.
I mean, it's-
God, I don't know. I think if we're ranking Batmans, and we, Heath Ledger, yeah, it's incredible. I mean, it's, God, I don't know.
I think if we're ranking Batmans and we are ranking Batmans,
I think Batman Begins goes above this one.
Yeah.
I think this goes, it goes Batman Begins, Dark Knight.
I agree.
But, you know, they're both good.
Yes.
Aren't they?
Yes.
Oh, but here's, James, this one's going to get some bloody hate mail,
isn't it?
Two-Face, though.
Oh, yeah.
That's good. That's good.
That's true.
And that big, like, that effect on his face.
Yeah.
And the opening with the heist and the whatever.
And the end with Rachel.
Rachel.
Rachel.
And then the middle because she explodes.
Rachel.
Yeah, and she was going to break up with him.
Yeah.
And he didn't know that.
And then Alfred's like, I'll burn the letter.
And then later he's like.
We haven't been ranking Alfred's, but it's too late now, I think.
It's Michael Caine, I think.
Yeah.
Oh, you think he's, oh, we're going to do a separate table
for ranking the Alfreds.
I fucking love Michael Caine.
Okay, next week instead of.
And he's funny.
Instead of reviewing the Batman next week,
we're just going to rank the Alfreds.
You like him, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I just, I think the rapport between them is good.
You know, you believe their relationship.
I think he should have had a little mustache.
You're probably right. And a bald patch patch and just the hair along the sides there.
Yeah.
I just don't know.
There's something I like the fun that he brings to it.
And I think.
Oh, you mean that fun story about the man who watches the world burn?
Yeah.
And so he decided to burn down a forest to get a man who was stealing diamonds?
Yeah.
That is a fun story.
Just let him go.
He is funny, that guy.
No, but he makes fun of Bruce Wayne a lot. He's like, you're ridiculous. a fun story, James. You're right. He is funny, that guy. No, but he makes fun of Bruce Wade a lot.
He's like, you're ridiculous.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm doing this, but this is ridiculous.
Yeah.
And we're both going to jail.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
We're going to jail, Master Bruce, and when are we going to get out?
Never.
Never.
You know, he does that line.
He's like, never.
He's doing little speeches of confidence. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's great. Yeah. Anyway, but. Never. You know, he does that line. He's like, never. He's doing little speeches of confidence.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think that's great.
Yeah.
Anyway, but.
Never.
I think Alfred's all good, though, at all.
I don't think there's a bad Alfred.
Next we've got The Dark Knight Rises, which, of course,
came out in 2012.
Worse than these two.
Got an 87%.
Worse than the previous two.
I agree.
I like it.
Okay, but if we're ranking Batmans.
Yeah.
He's got a knee brace. He's got a knee brace.
He's got a knee brace.
We've got his spine.
We've got to rush through the Bane storyline.
We've got to rush through Nightfall.
Yeah.
Night Quest, Night's End.
Yeah.
Are we going to add another Batman?
No, there's no time.
And he goes bonk.
I think what.
Gives him a big back bonk.
What this one does better and probably the Dark Knight does better than Batman Begins
is you can see the combat more.
Yes, that's true.
But I think it's like probably purposefully obscured
in the first one because he's a creature of the night
and whatever.
But it's also very weird in this movie where he's-
I'm a creature of the night or whatever.
Who's that?
I'm a creature of the night or whatever.
Oh, okay.
But in this one he's just like out fighting Bane on the steps.
Oh, yeah, that's true.
In the daylight.
I always, every time I saw, when I saw the production stills for that,
I'm like, ooh, shades of 1960s Batman.
Yeah.
Just standing on the streets, just standing on the steps of City Hall.
Hello, citizens, it's me, Batman.
Yeah.
And the cops are living in the sewer for a year or whatever.
That's right.
They come out with immaculate uniforms and they charge the criminals head on.
Once your trench coat gets, like gets dirty and rumpled enough,
that's what we call Columbo saturation.
It's true.
Once your trench coat is dirty enough, it won't get any dirtier.
This is a very silly movie.
It's very silly.
Yeah.
In a good way, I feel that way.
I don't know.
You don't think so?
No, not really.
This is absolutely the one.
I mean, I'm not breaking any ground here to say I think this is the weakest one of those three.
Oh, definitely.
Yeah, I think that's true.
But, you know, I don't even hate this take on Bane that he's like he's very injured and in pain.
And British.
And British.
And so he's probably, you know, he's on a bunch of pain medication constantly, I guess.
That's fine.
Yeah.
They did that plane stunt at the start for real or whatever.
Good plane stunt, yeah. That's fine. Yeah. They did that plane stunt at the start for real or whatever. Good plane stunt, yeah.
Which is something.
I like the fight, the first fight between Batman and Bane
where he just gets like trounced.
Sure.
Like he's just throwing everything out of it.
It's just like he just keeps getting hurt.
Yeah, well, he could have used a gun.
He could have used a gun.
Just a regular gun.
Yeah, absolutely.
Or his grapple gun.
Just a bat gun in reserve.
Just a big bat gun in reserve, yeah.
He kills Tully. I'llul with a missile as well.
Yep.
Remember that bit?
Yes.
She shoots the big truck and she crashes and dies?
Yeah.
Where does this go then?
I think it's below 66, but it's above returns.
Yeah, look, gosh, I think it's below 66, but it's above Returns. Yeah, look, gosh, I think it's below 66.
But are you saying that it's better than 66 just because the budget is bigger
and it looks better?
No, I'm saying it's worse.
Sorry, I think it's worse than 66.
Yeah, it is worse than 66.
Sorry, between 66 and Returns.
Oh, yeah.
Okay, yeah.
How does that sound?
I think it's better than Batman Returns because I guess it is a Batman movie,
whereas Batman Returns is not a Batman movie.
It's about Christmas and freaks.
Yeah.
And, yeah, it feels weird to be like Batman 66 is better
than this like $250 million movie.
Well, I mean, Nolan should have made a better movie then, I guess.
But I still like it.
Like I like it.
There's like none of these I'm like I really hate this. Yeah. Yet. But I still like it. I like it. None of these I'm like, I really hate this.
Yeah.
Yet.
Yet.
Speak it up.
Here we go.
Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice 2016, 29% Rotten Tomatoes.
Big thumbs down from the critics.
Critics, they don't know everything, do they?
Would you say that maybe this movie has its fans, Mason?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You know, I would.
I reckon if you asked around, I reckon there'd be a few people on the old internet who might
have a few nice things to say about this movie, and why not?
Exactly.
What a barrel of laughs, this movie.
Okay, as Bruce Wayne, how's Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne?
I think great.
Agreed.
Because he's got...
Wait, do we see him as... We never see him as lazy CEO Bruce Wayne.
We don't see him – we see him as cool guy Bruce Wayne.
Oh, that's a good point actually.
But also I would say like the Batman animated series,
he's cool guy Bruce Wayne as well, right?
But is this Batman too – is this Bruce Wayne too cool?
He might be too cool.
Because he's always – he's having pills and booze and women for breakfast
or whatever.
Oh, yeah, he's like, yeah, because like Batman.
We're never going to learn that woman's name.
No, like Batman doesn't drink famously, I guess,
because you see it in like, well, that's one of the things I love about
The Dark Knight, yeah, when he takes the champagne flute
and he like throws it out over the balcony.
It's not like I don't drink, but he's just like, yeah,
of course he doesn't drink.
Imagine if Bruce Wayne saw you today, James.
It would be wild, right?
But.
You'd be like, oh, my God, you're real.
And he'd be like, shame on you.
Embarrassing.
God.
Well, I'd never leave Gotham City in your hands, James,
who I know all about.
What?
Yeah.
Did he listen to the show?
No.
Oh, no.
No, he's just heard of it.
So he's not a fan of it.
Yeah, I feed him exclusively negative information about you.
That wouldn't be hard to do.
But anyway, yeah, so I do feel like it does a bit of like this guy does it all.
Yeah.
He beds women, he drinks, and he's out at night.
You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah.
Where I think like they were sort of trying to do the Dark Knight returns
where he's older but he quits drinking and then comes back at the time.
They're just like, no, he still drinks.
But at the same time.
He would use pills and booze because he's been punched a bunch.
No, that's true.
But at the same time, opening sequence where he attempts
to save his employees, that's a great scene.
That is great.
That is an incredible start to a pretty average movie.
And what you want is you want a scene where Batman does Bruce Wayne stuff
and you go, oh, he's not just.
Yeah.
Because we mentioned in the 66 movie there's a scene where he's just Bruce Wayne
and he's taking on all the bad guys at once.
Oh, it's good.
And that's a cool scene.
Yeah.
And it's the same with this.
It's like, okay, but are you just a guy in like a mech suit?
Yeah.
With a bunch of gadgets and an indestructible tank car?
Anyone can do it.
Because that's not fun.
Yeah.
But this is good.
This guy's.
I mean, he's just driving really.
No, but.
But he's driving very well.
But even you see the bit where like you're talking about the start where everybody's
running away and he's running into the rubble.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like that.
I mean, obviously the warehouse sequence.
And look, this isn't a Batman movie, really.
It's about, you know, I don't know what it's about.
But it's got a bunch of themes, doesn't it?
We've covered it for Caravan of Garbage.
But it's not really, he's in it, but it's not a Batman movie, really.
Though it's probably more of a Batman movie than a Superman movie, I guess.
Yes.
Yeah.
Anyway, and they have a big punch-out with Superman and it's okay.
You know?
It's bad.
But, yeah, it's okay.
How do we rank this Batman then?
It's probably – is it better than The Dark Knight Rises?
Yes.
You think?
I think it is, yeah.
It might be, actually.
Yeah, I think it is.
God, I don't know if that's true.
But, again, this is – I don't know, yeah. I mean, he feels comic book actually. Yeah, I think it is. God, I don't know if that's true. But again, this is, I don't know, yeah.
I mean, he feels comic book accurate.
Yeah.
I think he's way more comic book accurate than the Dark Knight Rises Batman.
The point's there, obviously.
I think his point's there, yeah.
All right, let's put him in above.
Does he ever hung upside down from the shackle things?
He's the bit at the start where the cops find him and he's hanging off the roof
and they start just like unloading fucking shotgun shells at him.
That counts, That counts.
Absolutely. And Warehouse Fight where he kills a bunch of men. Remember the bit where he used
his grapple gun to pull that box into that dude's
face? And the guy cracks his head on a wall or whatever.
And then the blood smith down the wall.
Yeah, I remember that. Remember the bit where he kicks the grenade
into that dude and he explodes or whatever? Yes.
I remember. James, every
kill Batman has ever done has been
It's in a video.
It's been melted into my brain, yes.
What about the bit where the guy's like, I'm going to kill this guy's mum and he's like.
I'll kill you first.
And I did.
I just did it.
What do you think about that?
I don't know why I'm still talking to you.
You're dead because I killed you.
You know what I think the problem with this is, though, this guy is.
Yes.
The suit, especially in hindsight, it's too big.
He's too big. It's weird. It's weird how
big he is. No, it is weird how big he is.
And it's fake big. It's not like he's big.
Isn't Affleck quite big in that movie?
You see him in real life and you see him shirtless
and he's added big
muscles to his suit. I think
that's just your imagination that's adding the
width to him. You know what you're forgetting though?
What's that? That he fights Doomsday in this movie also.
That's true, he does, yeah.
So does that make it still better than...
Yes, it does.
Because I don't like any of that.
No.
No?
All right.
I think it's better than Dark Knight Rises.
All right, I'll do it.
I don't care.
Okay, great.
Yes, persistence wins again.
Do you know what also came out that year, though?
You're never going to believe this, Mason.
Some sort of Lego Batman?
No, The Killing Joke.
2016. 38%
Rotten Tomatoes.
It's bad. Yeah, it is bad.
Let's put it at the bottom.
It's a weird relationship with Batgirl.
Yeah, like that's bad.
It's also, they do a bunch of other stuff
at the start before they get to the killing joke.
Yeah.
It could have been really good.
I think the performances are good.
I think like, you know, Mark Hamill, Kevin Conroy.
Yeah, yeah, sure, sure.
Can't really go wrong there.
But just, I don't know.
They didn't, they could have updated it in interesting ways.
But they only updated it in weird ways.
In weird and bad ways.
Let's put it at the bottom.
I think it would have been way better if they went,
this is 40 minutes.
Because the killing joke is like, it's like one issue,
you know what I mean?
Yeah.
Or whatever it is, 30, 40 pages, I can't remember.
But that's why there's like this whole subplot about a crime boss
who's in love with Batgirl, who she's trying to stop,
and then it just goes, and now it's time for the killing joke, everybody.
I didn't like it.
There could have been an opening short where Batman's trying to rescue a baby
that keeps running around in dangerous situations.
I like that.
Yeah.
It's down the bottom.
Yeah.
Then 2017.
Uh-oh.
90% Rotten Tomatoes.
Hello.
The Lego Batman movie.
Oh, okay, sure.
This is a fun one.
Have you seen it?
Yes.
It's good.
It's funny.
Will Arnett as Batman.
I'd probably watch it once a month.
Sure.
Now, as far as Bruce Wayne goes, he's never really Bruce Wayne, is he?
Not really.
He's just been cool the whole time.
So he loses points for that.
It's got Robin.
Does have Robin.
And it's got all of his rogues galleries.
That's true, yeah.
It's got the Phantom Zone.
Yeah.
It brings in a bunch of other franchises, including Harry Potter and King Kong and stuff, I think.
Did we review it?
I don't think we did.
Okay.
Yeah, maybe we did.
I think it's fine.
I think it's really good.
Okay.
Would you put it above The Dark Knight Rises?
Yes.
No, no, I wouldn't.
I personally wouldn't.
Would you put it above Batman Returns?
Yes.
I would definitely put it above Batman Returns.
I would actually put it higher in general, but whatever.
Again, I'm hungover, so you win.
And we're towards the end of the list.
Yes, that's right.
So we're running out of steam.
Exactly.
Oh, mate, you're going to have to get some steam back in your britches, Mason.
Okay.
Because in 2017.
Hold on, I'm just going to steam my britches.
In 2017, coming in at 40% is Joss Whedon's Justice League.
Justice League.
Yeah, this is, as I've famously said, this is a famous thing that I've said.
I think as a movie it's okay.
But it's not really.
As a Justice League movie it's like atrocious.
I hate it.
It's the worst one.
It's the worst DCEU movie there is, I think.
But it's also the worst because they just tried to make it a different movie.
Like that's, do you know what I mean?
They went, oh, let's make something
good and crowd pleasing. Yeah, but that's
not my fault, is it? No.
No, no, no. Are you saying it's
my fault, James? What I'm
saying is like, that's not an excuse.
I'm saying that's one of the reasons why
it's bad and that is not good.
Just because it had corporate interference doesn't
mean that that's okay. Yeah.
That's bad.
But, like, let's break down this Batman.
He has a gun.
He has an alien gun.
He's got an alien gun.
He's all sweaty all the time.
Yeah, he's clearly, like, because of the reshoots,
he's clearly, like, struggling, like, personally.
Wig is bad.
Wig is askew.
Wonder Woman shoves him that time.
That's fun.
I like that.
What is good in this?
The song that the people sing at him. No, that's in the other one. That's fun. I like that. What is good in this? The song that the people sing at him.
No, that's in the other one.
He's got a...
All his vehicles are weird. He fights Superman
sort of. Not really.
He turns up late to fight Superman. His vehicles
are worse than the
Nolanverse vehicles.
Because none of them are bat related. They're all
sea creatures for no reason.
One's a crab. One's a big whale.
And there's the car, obviously.
Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
He couldn't get that ship to fly.
How did he do it?
He just did it.
Cyborg, was it?
I like Alfred.
Yeah, sure.
He's also in Batman v Superman.
That's true.
It's worth a mention, I guess.
Yeah.
How's the Batcave?
I don't hate it.
Yeah.
It's a little clean, I would say.
And it's also one level.
Yeah.
You know what I mean? It's like one. It's got say. And it's also one level. Yeah. You know what I mean?
It's like one.
It's got stuff in it.
Yeah, it does.
But it's got like a costume of his.
Have they ever done the dinosaur?
It's got a costume of the dead boy that he knew.
Yeah, the dead boy.
Yeah, yeah.
The dead body that he put in the line of fire of crime that was murdered.
Do they ever do the giant penny and the dinosaur?
I don't think they do.
I don't think they do.
God.
But it feels like a museum a bit.
Yeah, it does, doesn't it?
Yeah.
Because it's got like glass cases of things and whatever.
But, you know, he's constantly working on a new headset or whatever.
I don't know.
And then he's like, then Batman Tactical Genius is like,
hey, now that I've got you here, stay here.
Stay here.
And I'll do this myself.
He's a bad Batman.
He's a bad Batman.
Bad Bruce Wayne.
Yep.
He's all sweaty.
Yep.
Bottom of the list.
Bottom, but under the Killing Joke.
Killing Joke was probably cheaper to make.
It not probably was.
It was definitely cheaper.
It's got Kevin Connery as well.
It's got Mark Hamill.
You're right.
Fair enough.
Justice League is on the bottom.
So bad.
Justice Week.
Well, it's interesting coming back to this now because now we're doing 2021 Zack Snyder's
Justice League.
71% Rotten Tomatoes.
Yeah, right.
Famously will win the Oscar for most popular picture ever made.
That's right. You know what I mean? I'm looking forward
to that getting up this year. Big upset.
But, um...
It's better. I like it. I think it's cool.
And I said this when we reviewed it,
it's like the Chronicles of Riddick
of Justice League Batman movies.
Did you say that?
Something like that. Because, you know, like, there's
Pitch Black, and you're like, oh, that's a fun little like adventure.
I wonder what else is happening in this universe.
Oh, my God.
What is happening?
I changed my mind.
I didn't want to know.
No, thank you.
But like flashbacks of dark-sided big stone men talking to each other.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's just like.
Uh-huh.
And also like it makes much more sense than the other ones.
It does make more sense.
And it's much better than Batman v Superman I feel.
And it's got the nightmares.
No, it doesn't have the nightmare sequence?
Yeah, it does.
It does have a nightmare sequence.
Yes.
A different one than the second Batman v Superman.
Yeah.
How's the Batman though?
We've got to rank this Batman.
What's he doing in this one?
Great question.
He's assembling the team properly I guess.
Yes, that's true.
You know? He's making a go of it. He's not joking. He's not doing many jokes one? Great question. He's assembling the team properly, I guess. Yes, that's true.
He's making a goal, but he's not joking.
He's not doing many jokes.
He assembles the team for a reason.
At the end, he's like, I'll buy you a house.
He's not a sweaty.
I'll buy you a house.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
This is Martian Manhunter.
Yeah. All right.
Is it?
Yeah, it is.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, he's not fast.
He sees an alien, he's like, whatever.
You know, because he already saw a bunch of aliens.
So not fast, that's ranked quite highly?
I think so.
For Batman, he's not fast, is he?
He's very rarely surprised.
Where is that bat?
Like, you know where he lives?
It's off a lake?
Yeah.
Where is that?
Because Wayne Manor burnt down or whatever.
Is that in Gotham City still?
Yeah, it's just outside.
Is that lake?
Because the lake goes into the Batcave, right?
Yes.
So presumably it's like a little thing he lives off the main property.
Okay, right.
I assume.
It's going to make a big Justice League, remember?
Oh, that's true.
It's like let's make a big Justice League forever.
Don't you reckon, guys?
Guys, what do you reckon?
You reckon?
Do you reckon we should?
What do you reckon?
I reckon we should.
The Flash reverses time.
Yeah, but that's not Batman.
No, no, but it happens.
Yeah.
And I like, I love the bit at the end when they all, though I don't think Batman is involved in this. Yeah, but that's not Batman really. I know, but it happens. I love the bit at the end
though I don't think Batman is involved in this.
Well then... No, but they all team
up to decapitate Steppenwolf.
That's all... Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then they all just look at each other through a portal
that's like, ooh, this is bad news.
You can't see it, but Batman, he gets his phone out
and he does a selfie and
the victory fingers and
he puts it on Instagram.
He's like, hey, we defeated Steppenwolf.
Yeah.
And all his friends are too polite to be like,
you didn't do anything.
Don't you think it's weird that Steppenwolf didn't fire
his Omega beams through the portal and kill every one of those people?
Oh, you mean Darkseid?
Darkseid or whatever?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Anyway, but just like, you know what,
this probably isn't even worth bringing up,
but there was a rumor this week, last week,
I don't know, that they're going to give
Zack Snyder a HBO Max
Nightmare Universe Justice League
show. I would love that.
Do you think they would
for one? I would also love it.
You said it in its own
continuity. I mean, what's HBO Max?
What are they
pushing currently? Surely at a certain
point they're going to be like, we don't have anything
for like a couple of months.
We need a show every
week for a couple of months.
Season two of Peacemaker's not ready yet.
Has anybody made a show that we could
put on our network? Oh jeez, we forgot to make
any shows.
Oh jeez, don't be mad.
Don't be mad, boss.
I don't know what their relationship looks like, but I reckon they would Boss, we forgot to make any shows. Oh, jeez. Don't be mad. Don't be mad, boss. Yeah.
I don't know what their relationship looks like, but I reckon they would have to have at least considered it
considering that nobody ever shuts the fuck up about this universe.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Not even for a single second, including us.
I wonder if all the people who, like the big Snyder fans,
are they already on board with HBO Max?
I think. Oh, that's a great question. Here's my question, I they already on board with HBO Max? I think.
Oh, that's a great question.
Here's my question, I guess, is did everybody sign up?
Was there a huge influx of subscribers to HBO Max when Zack Snyder's Justice League came out and then it all went away?
Like they all cancelled.
Yeah.
Because then you'd be like, oh, we can still get those guys again.
But if everybody subscribed and just stayed subscribed,
there's no point.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I would watch it and also because.
Would Affleck even do it?
Doesn't matter.
Get somebody else.
Yeah.
Get Armie Hammer.
Oh, wait, no.
Why do you reckon you couldn't get him?
Bad.
Bad.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Who else is?
Also, he's going to be too busy with the death on the Nile of us.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Sequels to that.
Yeah.
I watched that movie, didn't I?
Did you? No. Okay, good. Your, yeah, sequels to that. Yeah. I watched that movie, didn't I? Did you?
No.
Okay, good.
But your parents liked it, didn't they?
Yes.
Well, actually, I saw them quite recently and they were like,
when we saw that, we didn't like it.
And I'm like, which is it, mum and dad?
Did they really?
Because I think they watched it.
Then they watched a review?
No, then they watched like the old school Poirot stuff.
And I think now they're like, it was all right,
but it's not as good as that David Suchet fellow.
Interesting.
Yeah, yeah.
Interesting choice of words.
Anyway, you don't have to get Affleck.
Yep.
You probably do.
You kind of do.
You kind of do, yeah.
He also, like, he might do it.
Yeah.
Because he likes Snyder, you know, and he'd be in a costume
it wouldn't be him for most of it.
Well, yeah, I mean, you could do and he'd just be in a costume it wouldn't be him for most of it. Well, yeah, I mean you could do he films all his scenes
in a day and you meter him out.
Or you could be like, yeah, for season one's about
we've got to rescue Batman.
Also.
But they'd hate that because that's like he-man.
Yeah, but also like Batman gets his head torn off
like Superman.
So he wouldn't even need to be in it that much.
Unless it's a parallel universe to that parallel universe.
What? Yeah, it doesn't matter. Do you think so? Yes, because it doesn that much. Unless it's a parallel universe to that parallel universe. What?
Yeah, it doesn't matter.
Do you think so?
Yes, because it doesn't matter.
You're right, it doesn't matter.
Because why I would look forward to this as opposed to anything else
Snyder would do is because it's not a canonical universe.
It's just whatever.
And if he wants to kill Batman or kill any of them and introduce his own,
it doesn't matter.
Okay.
Can Batman drink though?
Yeah.
And bed women?
Yes.
Cool. Okay. Is Aquaman dead? Yeah. And bed women? Yes.
Cool.
Okay.
Is Aquaman dead?
Yes.
Unless it's a different continuity.
Anyway, where does this sit?
Great question.
I think it's better than Dawn of Justice.
Yeah.
Is it better than Batman 66?
It's certainly longer by four times.
It is longer by a significant degree.
Yeah, chuck it in there.
Why not?
Above 66?
Is it?
I mean, it's a better movie certainly than some of the other stuff.
A better saga certainly.
Is it better than Mask of the Phantasm? But is it a better Batman movie?
I don't think it is a better Batman movie than Mask of the Phantasm.
Yep, all right.
So it's above Batman 66 but below Mask of the Phantasm?
I think it's below Batman 66.
You think it's better? I think it's worse than Batman 66. below Master Phantasm. I think it's below Batman 66. You think it's better?
I think it's worse than Batman 66.
All right, done.
No, it's not worse, but I think there's more Batman
because also in Batman 66 he's doling out the moral lessons.
Certainly is.
That's a classic Batman thing to do.
Just because they're drunk doesn't mean we should blow them up in a bomb.
Yeah, yeah.
Ben Affleck would be like, let's kill everyone, I reckon.
Let's kill everyone.
Yeah, let's kill everyone.
I'll do it.
I'll actually do it.
Give me the gun.
Because, I mean, the thing about it being a Justice League movie
is it's not all Batman all the time.
No.
It's, you know.
What a wild ride.
What a wild ride we've done it, folks.
Anyways.
Is that everything?
Yep, and this is what I think of the new Batman movie.
I'm breaking embargo.
Here we go, Mace.
I can't.
I'll go to jail.
Do you want that?
Yeah.
Oh.
I thought you'd say no. Do it, coward. Look, I'll go to jail. Do you want that? Yeah. Oh. I thought you'd say no.
Do it, coward.
Look, I'll say this.
I can say this.
Spoke to two people after.
Oh, you're going to say what they said?
Yeah, I can say this.
So you're going to say what the-
I'm not going to say specifically who said what, but one of them said-
But they broke the embargo.
Yeah.
So what you're basically saying is you're revealing that two people you know broke the
embargo, and once they figure out who they are, they're going to jail.
Yeah.
This is great.
This is like a puzzle.
These are two people that nobody knows, just to clarify.
Do I know them?
No, I've never even mentioned them before.
Have you even met them?
No.
You've never even met these people?
But I'll just say one of them really liked it and one of them, like, didn't.
Whoa.
So I don't know how that's going to play out.
Okay, James, all right.
Is this your two friends and their two guards
and one of them always tells the truth and one always lies?
Did you ask them?
Did you meet them?
Yeah, I've met them.
They're awful, right?
Yes.
Can't get a straight answer out of one or both of them.
I don't know, but you don't ask them their opinions.
Also, they're always guarding the thing.
They probably didn't even see it.
What are they guarding?
I don't know.
A screening of the Batman, no doubt.
Yes, that's right.
Anyway.
Okay, but how about this?
Next week, we'll bring this back.
Let's read out this canonical list.
Okay.
This indisputable list of the best Batman movies.
It's not possible to accurately put that in.
And yet we've done it somehow.
No, I mean like the new one.
Oh, I see.
You can't put it in.
Okay, well, let's give it away.
We'll watch it.
I'll watch it.
And then next week, we'll attempt to put it in.
We'll slot it in here next week.
I agree.
All right, so where's this list?
How's it going?
Oh, you want to read it from the top?
Yes.
Okay, or bottom up.
From the bottom.
Justice League 2017.
Yuck-o.
Batman the Killing Joke.
Yuck-o.
Also, we were like, we'll put it up because Mark Hamill and Kevin Conroy's in it.
They also did Mask of the Phantasm.
It's true.
So fuck those guys.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They can go to hell.
No, they're wonderful.
Batman Forever.
Batman and Robin.
Batman Returns. The Lego Batman movie. No, they're wonderful. Batman Forever. Batman and Robin. Batman Returns.
The Lego Batman movie.
The Dark Knight Rises.
Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice.
Whoa, controversial.
What a long title for a movie.
Wasn't it going to be Son of Sun and Night of Nights?
Awful.
Bat of Man.
Awful.
Zack Snyder's Justice League. Batman vful. Zack Snyder's Justice League.
Batman v Superman.
Zack Snyder's Justice League.
Batman 66.
Mask of the Phantasm.
Batman 89.
The Dark Knight.
Batman Begins number one.
Whoa.
Probably true.
I never thought it would roll out like this, let me tell you.
Yeah, what do you think would be number one?
A different movie.
Different movie, yeah.
Not a Batman movie.
No, just a different movie, yeah.
Wow, that's crazy.
Kramer versus Kramer.
Who did win the end of that?
Kramer.
Really?
By a lot?
Yeah, because Kramer was a whole lot, like really big.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Crushed Kramer under his boot.
That's really good.
Yeah.
You guys know what it's time for?
Is it time for?
What are we reading?
Yep.
What are we going to read?
It certainly is.
And not a moment too soon.
My goodness.
Oh, I've done the wrong theme song.
What theme song did you do? I didn't play it. I stopped it before I played. Here we go. I'm doing moment too soon. My goodness. I've done the wrong theme song. What theme song did you do?
I didn't play it.
I stopped it before I played.
Here we go.
I'm doing it for real.
Big relation.
I'm doing the theme.
Westworld.
Whoa.
Now, Mason, as a person who embraces the cinematic experience,
is it true that you watched The King's Man on Disney Plus?
I did watch The King's Man on Disney Plus.
It's true.
Could you sit further from your microphone, do you think?
Yeah, almost certainly.
Now, someone will fix it in post.
Don't worry about it.
Yeah.
Colleagues is all over it.
Pretty solid as a movie.
I was surprised.
Yeah.
It's much better than the second one.
Yeah. By a million billion miles.
Yeah, yeah.
It is a weird kind of movie to watch currently i agree
in the current circumstances in ukraine and so on and so forth because it's very much like
a world war it's a bunch of it's such an action adventure kind of thing it is it is it's more
reverent i think than it could have been like when i saw the post credits yeah having watched
having watched the first two i'm like or is this this Matthew Vaughn again? Yeah. I feel like because the first two are quite irreverent and rude
and I'm like, oh, this could be a bit.
And it's a bit rude.
It's a bit rude but I'm like.
It's a bit like Rasputin's gay.
Don't you think that's gross?
Yeah, yeah.
And it's sort of like, okay, I hope that.
It'd be weird if they sort of were like, oh,
this is too much of a lighthearted adventure.
But it's, you know, it takes most of the scenes quite seriously.
I would also say, I guess without spoiling it, I guess, too much,
Ralph Fiennes is like the lead of this movie.
Yes.
Like they kind of took like what Colin Firth's character sort of was
and just went, what if that was the guy?
The guy, yeah.
And I think that's wonderful.
At no point was I like, this man could never do this.
He is so old.
Yeah.
He's certainly not John Steed in the Avengers UK anymore.
Maybe he could have done it in the Avengers UK 97 or whatever it was.
Yes, exactly right.
With Emma Thurman.
And there's also, again, it's quite CGI dependent, I think.
Yeah, but I think it feels less.
It feels less CGI dependent than it could be.
There is a scene where he parachutes out of a biplane
and that looks really good, I thought.
And then a goat helps him.
A goat does help him, it's true.
Yeah, that's cool.
Yeah, I think it's, I was surprised because I heard it wasn't great.
Yeah.
And I think it's just better than that.
I think it's much better than people have been giving it credit for.
And it might also be the last one because I don't think it made any money
and whatever.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it's still on in cinemas in Australia and it's also on Disney Plus.
So what do you do?
Watch it on Disney Plus.
I don't want to leave the house.
Okay, we're going to spoil the post-credits, though.
Okay, you had to tell me about this.
And you were like, you're lying.
I went all the way to the end. You were this but you will not believe what happens in this post
credits and i went to the end and i'm like you all you because you told me what it was yeah and
then i'm like i went to the end and i'm like oh you've tricked me here yeah and why would i have
fallen for the trick that you because it was the thing you said was so outlandish that why would i
think that was real i'm so stupid for falling into this.
And then I'm like, oh, wait, is it mid-credits?
And he said yes.
And so I went to the mid-credits and it was there, and I'm like, huh.
Yeah.
So basically they are – so the League of Evil who's running all the bad stuff.
So Lennon.
So Lennon.
Lennon and whoever Daniel Bruhl is playing.
I can't remember.
It's like we've got a new game in town.
We've got a young man I want to introduce you to.
He's going to really help our League of Evil,
our secret League of Evil.
It contains like cartoonish villains but also real people from history,
including you, Vladimir Lenin.
Anyway, Hitler's here.
Anyway, this man's name is Adolf Hitler and it's like da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Like he's fucking Nick Fury. It's wild. It is Adolf Hitler. And it's like, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.
Like he's fucking Nick Fury.
It's wild.
It is wild.
Yeah.
Also, they've gone with, I guess, pre-World War II Adolf Hitler.
Yeah, because it's World War I.
Yeah, but he doesn't have the, he doesn't have,
like they haven't gone with the signature look of Hitler.
Yeah, because he was a soldier in World War I.
They went with long mustache and not Charlie Chaplin mustache.
Maybe that was the look that he had. Well, that's what moustache. Maybe that was the look that he had.
Well, that's what I'm saying.
It must be the look that he had.
Yeah.
Anyway.
I also watched the movie The Deer Hunter.
Robert De Niro.
I've never seen that.
It's good.
How many deers are they hunting?
A couple of deers.
Just two?
And then they go home?
Yeah.
Boys weekend.
Boys weekend, yeah.
You bloody love it.
Yeah.
De Niro, Christopher Walken, John Cazale, some other people.
Oh, Meryl Streep's in it.
Oh, really?
And here's the thing.
It is a very good movie.
Yep.
But it is three hours long and you've got to realise this is a saga.
Yeah.
It is.
Settle in.
You've got to settle in, yeah.
Wow.
Would you say it was good though?
Yeah, it's a good movie.
Did you watch Heaven's Gate, the movie he made after this? I didn't watch Heaven's Gate, no. Apparently it's a big no. Wow. Would you say it was good, though? Yeah, it's a good movie. Did you watch Heaven's Gate, the movie
he made after this? I didn't watch Heaven's Gate, no.
Apparently it's a big no.
Why is that, I wonder? I don't know.
Because this won the Academy Award, I think.
I did. It won Best Time.
Best Time You Can Have. Oh, Best Boys Weekend.
Best Boys Weekend.
This was, that spun off into the
MTV Movie Awards.
So the budget of Heaven's Gate was $44 million and it made $3.5.
Ooh.
Fucking hell.
Wow, all right.
There you go.
That's some 80s money as well.
Probably why that guy still isn't making movies.
Yeah, he's never made another movie.
Also, he's dead now, I assume.
He's dead.
I don't know if he is, actually.
Anyway, I've been-
Speaking of war, I don't know why, I think it was just a coincidence,
but it's the boys.
1926, Dan, you're right.
Yeah, right.
It's the boys.
They go for a boys' weekend, but then they have to go to Vietnam
and big traumas happen and then they come back.
And are they right?
They're not.
Because of the war.
The war, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Not even the power of the boys can bring them together again.
Just a boys' weekend can't fix everything,
which is pretty incredible if you ask me.
That sounds like it's a movie that's missing a message then,
you know what I mean?
You get to the end and it'll be like, actually,
having boys helped us immensely.
Having lads, lads, lads.
They missed the opportunity to kind of.
They did, didn't they?
Yeah.
That's really, really, really a shame.
That's interesting that it won any awards, really.
That's right. Not these days. No. It that it won any awards, really. That's right.
Not these days.
No.
It didn't win any awards.
I don't think so.
I think, I'm just going to say,
Comixology is still fucked, and fuck you whoever did that.
Yeah.
You absolute fucking garbage fucking person who did that.
People out there, I don't think we have this in Australia,
but if you're in America, there is a service called Hoopla,
which I think we've mentioned before, which is like you can...
It's like a library thing? Yeah, you can connect it to your local library and if they have any comic books, you can
get digital versions of the comic books to your device and you have to pay for them.
That's cool.
That's very cool.
Anyway, if someone could recommend another comic book buying service, but I need something
that has everything and new as it comes out.
Yeah, and also has all the stuff you've already bought.
Yeah, which has Comixology and if you could transfer the thousands of dollars I've spent over the years
of all that stuff into my new account on a different platform,
that would be amazing.
Wow.
Maybe I just print them all off, Mason.
I just print all my comics off that I bought.
Just print them off, exactly, yes.
Just put your phone in the room with the printer
and just leave it for a day.
Just let it rot.
A day, yeah.
Let it do it.
You know what it's time for?
Hang on.
Have you been reading anything else?
Nah, not really.
Watching anything else?
Nah.
I saw The Batman.
I don't know if I mentioned that.
Oh, you mentioned it so many times.
It's all you mentioned, actually.
That's okay.
That's okay.
I don't mind.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't mind mentioning it.
Let me see.
A lot of people consider it brave that I've seen The Batman.
Who?
A lot of people.
Name one person.
I can't.
I'm embargoed. You just asked that guy that lies, didn of people. I can't, I'm embargoed.
You just asked that guy that lies, didn't you?
I don't know which one I asked.
Am I really brave? Yes.
That's what I thought.
That's what I thought. That's what
I thought also. Anything else that you're reading?
Not currently, but I'll think of something later probably.
I can't wait for you to think of it. Anyway, now it's time for Letters.
Yes it is, yay!
Yay! The last one was Letters, oh Letters
We love you, some
Letters, they're only
a day away
I know they're here right now, we're gonna do
Letters.
Hello, hello, hello to the Letters
segment. This is the bit where I
Hello James. This is where I've run out of energy
the segment. Oh no. I've used all my energy to shout about Batman.
So basically, if you do want to reach the show,
hashtag WeeklyPlanetPod on Twitter or WeeklyPlanetPod at gmail.com
and maybe Mason will read your Gmail on the podcast.
Like this Gmail he's got right now.
This is from Simon.
Hello, Simon.
Who says, I told a friend about your podcast and now he's moving to Australia.
Oh, no.
To get us? Yeah, he's going to get us. Many years ago I told a mate a friend about your podcast and now he's moving to Australia. Oh, no. James and Mason. To get us?
Yeah, he's going to get us.
Many years ago I told a mate from work about your podcast.
He recently announced his plans to move to Australia.
And before he leaves, I feel we need your expertise to help settle an ongoing petty debate.
This isn't a regional debate.
It's just a petty debate.
I'm happy to do it.
He insists that Legion is one of the best TV shows that I have to watch.
I insist that Master and Commander is a great film that he should really watch.
We're both holding the other hostage
saying we'll watch the other's recommendation when
they've watched ours. This has lasted for two
years. Clearly all opinions are valid
but please let us know definitively which is better
and why Andy is wrong. Thanks for the entertainment.
From Simon. Well they're both
got themes. They're apples
and oranges aren't they? Which is what you
should have to prevent scurvy
in a world of Master and Commander, the
far side of the world.
I agree.
And not only that, if you don't mind me adding to it, Legion is two seasons long, whereas
Master and Commander is one movie.
Is it not more than two seasons?
I think it's more.
Legion is as many as it is.
There's four seasons of Legion.
I thought it might be three, if anything.
Let me check, Mason.
You should check.
I haven't also finished Legion.
No, no one has.
Wow. But I liked it a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let should check. I haven't also finished The Legion. No, no one has. Wow, but I liked it a lot.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Let's go.
What's going on?
What's going on?
Oh, baby.
Ba-da-da-da-da.
Ba-da-da-da-da.
91% Rotten Tomatoes.
Love and Life.
Everyone is in.
It's three.
27 episodes.
So there you go.
Whereas Master and Commander is one season.
One episode.
One episode.
It's like a British TV series.
What's better, though? I haven't seen Master and Commander since it came out in cinemas. It's like a British TV series. What's better, though?
I haven't seen Master and Commander since it came out in cinemas.
It's a good movie, though.
Yeah.
It's amazing they never did more of those.
Yeah, it didn't make any money.
Well, yeah, I was going to say, did it not hit it?
I think it made some money.
Yeah, right.
If it hit it at the right time, they would have done it
because there's a bunch of books, right?
Yes.
Yeah.
Maybe they'll bring it back.
Seems like an expensive movie to make.
Yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean?
Got to get a boat.
But who would be the master and who would be the commander? You know what I mean gotta get a boat but who would be the master
and who would be the commander
you know what I mean
I reckon I could do dual roles
I'll do them both
oh yeah you think so
you think you'd learn to play the violin
no
I'd just be like
this version of the character
does not play any instruments
your character would be like
now bring in the violin boy
and they bring in one of those
you know one of those dudes
they wear like an Edwardian frock coat
and they play like an electric violin you know one of those, you know one of those dudes they wear like an Edwardian frock coat and they play like an electric violin.
You know one of those guys?
You know those guys?
Yes, that's my movie, yes.
Great, terrific.
Anyway, he does the Becker theme on the violin.
Yeah, yeah.
There's like a, I go past it sometimes, there's a place near where I live
where they sell like synthesizers and electric keyboards or whatever
and on the front there's
like a cartoon image of a Tchaikovsky guy,
and he's playing like a vast bank of electronic keyboards.
It's just like that's incredible.
I agree.
I love it.
Master and Commander cost $150 million and it only made $211.
Oh.
So that is why something, something, the thing that I said.
Okay.
Yeah.
Which is better. I think Legion is that I said. Okay. Yeah. Which is better.
I think Legion is better. Yeah, probably.
But, I mean, Master and Commander is such a smaller time commitment.
Yeah, absolutely.
I think whoever is meant to be watching Master and Commander should commit,
should just be like, I'm going to take the two hours.
Just watch it while you're doing laundry or whatever.
Exactly.
Man, he made a bunch of stuff, Peter Weir, didn't he?
Sure did.
He made the treatment show.
He made Gallipoli.
Gallipoli.
And he made The Way Back, which I haven't seen in 2010, apparently.
The Way Back or The Way Way Back?
The Way Back.
Oh.
You're thinking The Way Way Back machine.
I am.
What did he do in Australia?
Did he do Picnic Hangar Rock?
Maybe he did.
Yeah, I think he did.
Okay.
I don't think I've ever seen that, or if I haven't,
not for a very long time.
Yeah, he did Picnic Hangar Rock.
Oh.
There you go.
Okay.
He did Witness.
He did the Mosquito Coast with Harrison Ford.
He did Dead Polit Society.
Oh.
This guy's killing it, mate, until he stops making movies.
Anyway, here's one from Matthew on Twitter.
It says, hashtag WeThePlanetPod.
I think you should do, for the next Caravan of Garbage,
Power Rangers, the movie, and Turbo, a Power Rangers movie.
I'm a Power Rangers fan, but I do not like these films at all.
I much prefer the show at the best moment and the worst moment.
Yeah, I would love to do the Power Rangers movies.
In particular, also, I'd like to do the new one again
and be like, this is weird.
What do they make this one?
Oh, yeah.
Why does this movie open with a joke about a dude jerking off a bull or whatever?
Was that the first thing in this movie?
Oh, no.
Yeah, anyway.
Have you seen any of those?
I've seen the 95 one.
No, I've only seen the most recent one.
Yeah, very good.
Yeah, they're not great in general from what I've seen and heard.
But, yes, Power Rangers.
Whenever they reboot it, we'll do it probably.
This is an email from Jera.
He says, remake classic movies in animation.
I will not.
Dear Sunday and myself.
Why don't you remake them?
Maybe I will.
Long-time listener here.
Started listening in middle school and now I'm almost graduating college,
studying animation.
Well, somebody's got a bloody agenda here, don't they?
I agree. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for being there. You're welcome. And while I'm here, somebody's got a bloody agenda here, don't they? I agree.
Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for being there.
You're welcome.
And while I'm here, I've got a question for you.
People talk a lot about live-action remakes,
but what about animated remakes?
Which franchise would you like to see get an animated remake
or just reboot with a new take, i.e. Spider-Verse?
I think Planet of the Apes could make for a cool stop-motion war film.
Oh, that's cool.
Because then you're doing like the old King Kong kind of like.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it's interesting, I guess.
I just think it's because of the monkey thing.
Yeah, yeah.
Wow, animated remake.
Yeah.
God.
Great question, isn't it?
Great question for a hungover man.
Why did they ask?
Yeah, I'm hungover, obviously.
Did they not know that?
Did they not mention of that?
P.S., are you okay?
Hope you're keeping your fluids up.
He doesn't seem to be concerned at all, actually,
of your hungoverness.
I don't know.
You answer this question, Mason.
Great question, James.
Thank you for giving it to me.
I appreciate it.
I think they could do it.
I reckon they should do a Kingsman.
I would love to see a Kingsman animated series.
Okay, yeah.
But, like, do it in old-timey animation style.
Like, give me a specific time.
Like Cuphead.
Like Cuphead. That's got an animation at the moment, doesn't it? It does have an animation.. Like give me a specific. Like Cuphead.
Like Cuphead.
That's got an animation at the moment.
It does have an animation.
I should watch that.
Netflix.
Because I like the animation style of Cuphead, but I haven't played it because I've heard it's difficult and I don't want to play anything that is difficult.
Yeah, that's why I'm like, should I get Elden Ring?
Seems difficult, but I might get it anyway.
I'd have to learn a new style of fighting.
As you know, I started Sifu, and it's very competently made.
I heard you're on a Sifu diet.
Yes, I Sifu the game, yes, and I eat it.
That's weird.
Is it?
Yeah.
You brought it up.
But I don't commit to that kind of stuff.
I got to the second level, and I got a little bit better,
and I got to the boss, and then I just went, you know what?
I'm just not going to get better at this and I'm okay with it, you know?
I think.
And it's very well made.
I think in terms of taking something live action
and putting it into animation,
I think you need a very distinctive looking movie
and or a very distinctive or a reason to like.
A reason to live.
Yeah, well, you do, absolutely.
And maybe it's the animated Kingsman series.
But because otherwise it'll just like, I don't want to watch a John Wick,
or do I?
They are doing a John Wick something.
Yeah, yeah.
Like if they get John Wick and they make it animated,
what are we getting out of that?
What will animation give us?
Yes, I see what you're saying.
That live action can't give us or doesn't have the budget for?
You know what I mean?
Have we talked Blade Runner?
Well, yeah, that does have some animated stuff.
Actually, that one came to mind.
But if you made that like an anime, because so much of that is inspired by.
Because they did.
Or has inspired anime.
Yeah, they did that.
They did Altered Carbon.
They did an anime.
Oh, they did too.
Did you watch that? Yeah, I did. It was all right. Yeah, they did that. They did Altered Carbon. They did an animated. Oh, they did too. Did you watch that?
Yeah, I did.
It was all right.
It was pretty all right.
But that's a very distinctive look and you can bring it into animation
as opposed to like if they did, you know, take in the animated series
and every week another of his daughters is taken.
I mean they're just going to transfer it into like fairly generic.
They did make that a series.
That was a taken TV prequel.
Well, then I apologise unreservedly.
It wasn't animated, so you don't need to apologise.
Okay, then I shan't apologise.
I mean, I was going to say Ninja Turtles, but they are doing that,
and they did that in 2007.
Yeah.
I recently rewatched that, and I think the problem with that movie
is that it's about monsters or something.
The TMNT version?
Yeah, it's actually.
Where Shredder's dead and.
Yeah, it's pretty solid, to be honest.
We didn't talk about the Seth Rogen new version of TMNT.
No, but there was imagery.
Yeah, they look all real goofy, like actual teens,
which I think is fun.
They're not tanks anymore, which I think I appreciate.
They were very big in those movies.
Yes.
Yeah.
I like the way that...
I love the way they've redesigned the Ninja Turtles over the years
and there's so many different incarnations.
Well, I hate it.
Wow.
I think they should pick a style and burn the rest.
That's what I think.
Anyway, animations, huh?
Yeah, let us know.
I reckon, though, you know how sometimes they'll do,
like in a Marvel comic, they'll go, okay, we're doing a flashback here
to like what was happening in the 70s.
And they do it in the style of the comic books in the 60s or 70s
or whatever, give us that
give us a movie
set in the 70s
and give us 70s animation
style, give us like a Hanna-Barbera
terrible animation
but better, but good? Yeah better but good
but it looks like Hanna-Barbera but it's better
Okay fair enough, what about this one Go on. It's from little animation, but better, but good. Yeah, better but good, but it looks like Hanna-Barbera. Give us something like that, yeah. Okay, fair enough.
What about this one then?
Go on.
It's from Jess who says, on a train ride to London,
good excuse to finally start to catch up on hashtag weekly planet pod.
Whoa.
The last next episode I need to listen to is episode 340 from June 2020.
What?
How did I get so far behind?
Just a bunch of time like stopped like for a couple of years.
Sure did, yeah, yeah. Remember? Remember when everything just stopped for two years? I remember that. Yeah, and nothing happened for two years. far behind uh just a bunch of time like stopped like for a couple years that's it yeah remember
remember when everything just stopped for two years i remember that yeah and nothing happened
for two years but then we all came out and went oh fuck we're all older by two years for some
reason right how is that fair how am i better looking somehow you said you said to me and you
said about me that's what you said you thought i was better looking and i went thank you that's
what i said wow god I've still got it.
Even hungover, he can build a web
of logic like the best of them.
Anyways, thank you for coming back and listening.
What else, Mason? That's the whole show, I think.
No, I've got one more. Oh, you've got one more.
From Jock, who says, look, we don't normally
do these, but I thought this was an interesting
one and maybe we'll do a versus coming up soon.
It's from Jock Doe, who says,
hashtag weekly planet pod,
Willy Wonka versus Mary Poppins, standard showdown rules
from back in the day, who wins?
So that's standard American football field.
They both appear at opposite ends of the football field.
They are aware that the other person is a threat and they have to kill them
or, sorry, if they're non-lethal, they're non-lethal.
If they kill, they kill.
Mary Poppins is a magic demon and would murder Willy Wonka.
Yeah, she's got the it powers.
She's got Pennywise powers.
She could trap him in a cartoon or whatever.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She could do anything to him.
But she's not a murderer probably.
No.
But Wonka is definitely a murderer.
100%.
He'll kill a lot of children.
He's got a knife in that cane.
We've talked about it.
But she's pulling things out of that bag.
What else do you got in there?
A gun?
Maybe.
I think if he's outside of the chocolate factory,
his options are limited.
Because he's only got that knife.
He's only got the knife, yeah.
And a forward roll.
And I think Mary Poppins has been stabbed by unruly children
a lot of times and it doesn't affect her at all anymore.
And she doesn't age.
Yeah.
She's immortal.
Do you think that would affect her in the fight?
He's like, oh, I'm doing a forward roll.
And she's like, you're in a painting.
And he's like, ah.
Forward roll all you like.
You're in a weird watercolour world, ah. Forward roll all you like. You're in a weird watercolor world.
You have to dance with penguins for the rest of eternity.
Yeah, no, it's Mary Poppins.
Yeah, definitely.
I love that new Mary Poppins movie.
Oh, I haven't seen it.
I think it's terrific.
Anyways, that's the show.
That's the whole show.
Somehow, I just think I should get a lot of kudos because I did this show.
I think, you know, maybe people should sign up at Big Sandwich to thank me.
Oh, yeah.
With money.
Thank me with money is what I'm essentially saying.
Well.
No, thank you for listening, everybody.
That's exactly right.
Thanks for listening, folks.
Thank you for subscribing.
Thank you for telling your friends about the podcast because that's how we get new listeners most of the time.
I agree.
Because people really insist and then they listen and they're like, you normally have bad ideas, friend, but this time this was a good idea.
This was a good idea.
And in future I'll listen to more of your ideas even though I know
in my heart they're bad.
Yeah, this is the one.
But you were right this time.
The one good thing you've done is given me enough faith to the future.
Yeah, that's right, exactly, which you'll dash against the rocks
master and commander style.
And also thank you for leaving a five-star review on whatever platform
because we find them and that's how other people find them as well.
That's right.
Because it puts us up in the rankings somehow.
That's right.
James Gaffney?
Yeah, Clay wrote this.
He said, fantastic movie review podcast.
This podcast has been such a pleasure to listen to.
It's by far one of my favorite movie review podcasts.
The guys always give me a ton of laughs, yes,
and are amazing to listen to during long drives.
Thank you so much.
And here's one here from KB Northrup who says,
pour me another glass of white wine, Jurassic Snark.
So the premise of this show, two guys with weird accents
that they don't think are weird accents, both named Nick, I think,
give opinions on movies, comics, and TV shows.
I started listening about three years ago and turned my then boyfriend,
now husband, onto it.
He thinks he's a bigger nerd than me, but, like,
I found this podcast first, so I think
I win, and it's probably true. Both
of the Knicks are funny, informative, and even
when they talk about video games, which I
really don't care about, I don't turn their
podcast off because I enjoy them so much. I did
consider only giving this podcast four stars because
my favorite character, Jurassic Snark,
does not come up often
enough. I very much want to know
what...
It's hard to read when I'm hungover, but this is very kind.
Sure, you're doing very well, I think.
Thank you.
I very much want to...
I can't even...
I don't even know what I'm saying.
I very much want to know what that mean dinosaur has to say
about my nice review.
Mr. Sunday content, a pig rolling down a hill for life.
If you want to get all the in-jokes, you have to listen.
Thank you so much.
That's right.
Jurassic Snark is, of course, your famous character.
He's a very sassy dinosaur.
Yeah.
Or critic of the movies.
Just mean.
Just a mean dinosaur, I think.
I mean, he'll be back for Jurassic World Dominion.
No doubt.
And we're probably going to be doing the Jurassic movies
for Caravan of Garbage.
Oh.
Big Jurassic.
Maybe you're saving it all up, aren't you?
I'm saving it all up, yeah.
All this vitriol.
That's right.
Yeah, here we go.
I wouldn't waste it on a review such as that.
Whoa!
You never know when he's going to scratch you.
That's right.
He's a big bitch.
Anyway, folks, thank you for leaving those nice reviews.
You can do them in your apps usually.
If you want to get into contact with us,
you can go to weeklyplanetpod at Gmail.
I'm extraordinarily hungover, Mason.
I don't know if you know that.
You're really falling to bits.
Just remain quiet for another 45 seconds.
I don't need to do anything, do I?
You don't have to do anything.
Okay, good.
Just shh, shh.
Folks, you can go to weeklyplanetpod at Gmail,
at Facebook, at Twitter, at Bandcamp.
You can follow the Weekly Planet and at RawCollings on Twitter.
That's our friend RawCollings.
He edits the podcast.
He edits videos.
He does all kinds of crazy stuff.
He keeps the wheels turning on Twitter.
I'm Wikipedia Brandon.
On Instagram, I'm Nick May.
So N-I-C-K-M-A-S-E-A-U.
James' Mr. Sunday Movies everywhere.
If you want to support the show, you can go to patreon.com
slash MrSundayMovies. You can chuck in a buck or any, you can go to patreon.com slash Mr. Sunday Movies.
You can chuck in a buck or any amount you wouldn't miss in any given month.
Just a little teeny tiny little bit of change.
We don't mind.
Or if you're a big spender, you can go to bigsandwich.co
for $9 per month.
You can get all sorts of bonus podcasts and extra content
and early videos and all kinds of stuff.
That's right.
We're having a great time over there.
We did the Boot Club.
We had a great time over at Boot Club.
It's a good time to have a Boot Club.
Just quite recently.
Thank you to the Brute and the Bassist. It's going to rank them for all the musical themes. You can
buy t-shirts at tpublic.com. Just search
for the Weekly Planet and get a real one or
a bootleg one. They're all bootleg at this point
I think actually. Yeah, probably. Yeah. Get
a Weekly Planet poster as well. Yeah, they're fun. I like those.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Turns out Chris who runs
Weekly Planet posters, he made
our fake NFTs. I saw that, yeah.
If you follow him on Instagram, he made our fake NFT ape men.
He just got all existing ones and he stitched them together.
Yeah, exactly.
Frankenstein style.
Which is probably how they make them in general, I think.
Yeah, yeah, or it's a generator.
Yeah, yeah.
That's the whole show.
That's the whole show.
Next week, the Batman.
Good.
The Batman.
I can't wait to watch it again because I've already seen it.
Are you going to watch it again? I might actually seen it. Are you going to watch it again?
I might actually if I get time.
I mean, it's three hours long, so I might not be able to.
Yeah, yeah.
I kind of, I do.
But, you know, I always say that and then I often don't.
Yeah.
You know?
And Snake Eyes.
Oh, yeah, shit.
Yeah.
Where would Snake Eyes rank in the Batman movies, do you reckon?
Well, Batman is definitively not in them.
Okay.
So.
So above Batman v Superman. Yes. Okay. So. So above Batman, but he's in there.
Yes.
Okay, good.
All right.
All right, thanks for listening, everybody.
Grab that gem, you guys.
We will see you next week for the Batman.
Goodbye, the Batman.
Batman.
Batman is Batman.
Batman.
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FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London. One woman has a secret, the other a mission to
reveal it before thousands of lives are lost. FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming
on Disney+.