The Weekly Planet - 506 Napoleon (the horny little rat man)
Episode Date: November 27, 2023It's time for another podcast and it's also time for another Ridley Scott historial epic in Napoleon. Plus we talk the fallout from the firing of Melissa Barrera from Scream 7, Lex Luthoer casting fo...r Superman: Legacy, Dave Filoni gets promoted, a new Karate Kid movie and a fun guy steals a bunch of money from Netflix. Thanks for listening!Confessions podcast (new James ep out now or very soon): https://open.spotify.com/show/1Njlpt8rFB9HBy40s2QGGWVisit bigsandwich.co for a bonus weekly show, lets play videos, exclusive movie commentaries, early stuff and ad-free podcast feeds for $9 per month.00:00 The Start03:44 The Scream 7 Situation10:28 New Superman: Legacy Casting13:08 New Star Wars Chief of Creative18:53 New Karate Kid Multiverse(?) Movie25:31 Wild Netflix Director Story31:05 Napoleon 2023 Movie Review (spoilers 47:03 to 56:58)56:58 What We Reading, What We Gonna Read01:04:10 Letters, It's Time For LettersJames' Twitter ► http://twitter.com/mrsundaymoviesMaso's Twitter ► http://twitter.com/wikipediabrownMaso's Instagram ► https://www.instagram.com/nickmaseauThe Weekly Planet Twitter ► https://twitter.com/theweeklyplanetPatreon ► https://patreon.com/mrsundaymoviesTWP iTunes ► https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-weekly-planet/id718158767TWP Direct Download ► https://play.acast.com/s/theweeklyplanetTWP YouTube Channel ► https://goo.gl/1ZQFGHAmazon Affiliate Link ► https://amzn.to/2QbmwGjT-Shirts/Merch ► https://www.teepublic.com/stores/mr-sunday-movies Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship
between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret.
The other, a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+. Welcome back everybody to another episode of the Weekly Planet where we talk movies and comics and TV shows.
Mason, put on Recordo Moltelbahn.
I'm doing it.
Because you would have a backup recorder.
We're going to talk about these TV shows.
You're always banging on about it quite frankly.
I certainly am. We're going to talk about these TV shows that you're always banging on about, quite frankly.
I certainly am.
Because on this show, we talk movies and comics and TV shows.
My name is James Olsen, known as Mr. Sunday.
With me as always, is that my co-host, Nick Mason?
Sure is.
Knowing that it is.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
Wow, what a setup for me.
Thank you.
Absolutely, yeah.
And a betrayal?
Yeah, sure.
I think.
Seemed that way.
It's been a big week, hasn't it?
For betrayals, Napoleon, you know?
Oh, that's true.
So many people being like, I'll invade this with you. And then they don't!
They let him down! He's just a guy!
Leave him alone! He's just a guy!
He's an absolute, he's the master of warfare.
Because he was like, what if we shoot cannons
at people?
Seems poor sportsmanship. No, I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna do it! I'm gonna shoot cannons at more
people than anyone's ever shot cannons at anyone
before. This man's a genius! I brought more cannons! Well, I do want to do it. I'm going to shoot cannons at more people than anyone's ever shot cannons at anyone before. This man's a genius.
I brought more cannons.
Well, I do want to talk about that specifically.
Okay.
But we've got to get to all the news, Mason.
We've got a big shuffle around for Scream 7, which is going to be a really fun thing to talk about.
Oh, my God.
We've got some Superman legacy casting.
We've got a new creative chief officer at Lucasfilm.
We've got a new Karate Kid movie, Mason?
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Is it merging the worlds of Karate Kid?
It appears to be, yes.
Wow.
Okay.
The Karate Kid multiverse, wow.
Oh, my God, another Jason Bourne movie.
Oh, my God.
And then, of course, the director who stole a bunch of money from Netflix.
Allegedly?
Or he did?
It seems like he just did.
Okay.
Well, the New York Times said he did.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's their fault anyway.
That's right.
And then, of course, we're going to talk about Napoleon because what a movie
and what a time to be alive.
Absolutely.
I just want to quickly say up top, I was on a podcast recently,
which will be out on Monday.
So by the time this goes out on the regular feed,
called Confessions with Sam Peterson.
You might be familiar.
I recently did it on the same feed.
He also has a podcast, just a smaller one called I'm the Arsehole,
where he reads stuff from Reddit. It's like called I'm the arsehole where he reads stuff
from Reddit
and it's like
who's an arsehole
and sometimes
but sometimes not
it's called
am I the arsehole
it's not called
I am the arsehole
did I do
you did say that
am I a big arsehole
I think that was a Freudian
slip of some kind
am I though
I'm on a podcast
called I'm an arsehole
and everyone thinks it
is that just all
the correspondence
guilty conscience
oh my god yeah but I did an episode of Confessions with Rob Millsy Mills And everyone thinks it. Is that just all the correspondence? Guilty conscience. Oh, my God.
But I did an episode of Confessions with Rob Millsy Mills.
People might know.
My goodness.
Pop star Rob Millsy Mills.
That's right.
He's a star of Stage and Screen or whatever.
That's true.
He's very nice.
Stage and Screen or whatever.
Stage and Screen or whatever.
Was that on his business card?
Yeah, that's what he handed to me.
Wow.
Yeah, it was a lot of fun.
I'm like, what's this guy like?
I don't know.
I've never met him.
And he was really, really cool.
I think you probably can't endure in this sort of business if you're like. Wow. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. I'm like, what's this guy like? I don't know. I've never met him. And he was, yeah, he was really, really cool. I think, you know, you probably can't endure in this sort of business if you're like the worst person in the world. No, he's been doing it for
20 years. Yeah. Plus. So anyway, that was a lot of fun. So that's, um. Well, you can only endure
in this business if you're the worst person in the world. Oh yeah. It's one or the other. It's
one or the other. And he was the good one. That's cool. Uh, so yeah, that is, um, yeah,
Confessions and it will be linked below.
It's just a fun podcast.
You've been on a few times.
There's a bunch of great comedians and guests.
And us somehow.
We're in it sometimes, yeah.
So Sam is an absolute delight.
I've always wondered like, you know, sometimes you get a message
and it's like, hey, can you come on my podcast?
And you're like, oh, that's nice.
But then you're like, who else dropped out?
How many more people dropped out?
Exactly.
All of them.
Where am I on the call list?
Oh, you had to create a new call list.
You ran out of slots.
Okay, well, that's fine.
Your phone died from calling different people.
You had to buy a new phone.
And you saw me walking past Charlie Brown style with my head down,
as I often do, and you're like, no, he'll do.
He'll do, yeah.
Mason, we've got to do this.
We're going to talk about Scream 7 because Melissa Barrera,
who's the star of the last two Scream movies,
she's kind of taken over from the Niamh Campbell role
to be the lead Scream queen in the Scream series,
a series which like somehow has just remained or re-emerged
as relevant and it's got good twists and turns.
It's endured like a Rob Millsy Mills.
Exactly.
The Rob Millsy Mills of horror franchises.
Exactly, Mason.
So, yeah, but due to some Instagram stories that you put up about a month ago,
she has been let go.
And now we've got to get into a conflict.
Yeah, we sure do.
We don't have to.
We can avoid it.
If you don't want to hear this, skip ahead.
It's all been time-coded by the great Rob Collings,
who didn't know we were going to do this.
None of this is his fault.
No.
So that's cool.
Absolutely not.
So, yeah, I don't know.
Where do you want to start on this?
I mean, what was the statement?
Well, the statement was from Spyglass.
Spyglass stands as unequivocally clear.
Unequivocably.
They spelled that wrong.
Not me.
Yeah, that's bad on them.
We have zero tolerance for anti-Semitism or the insolvent of hate in any form,
including false references to genocide, ethnic cleansing,
Holocaust distortion, or any other that flagrantly crosses the line
into hate speech.
Now, if you looked at her stories, which you can, they are available,
none of that stuff is present in what she said.
Like a lot of people, she's like, maybe nobody should be bombing civilians.
You know what I mean?
Maybe there's a bunch of children that have been like murdered, war-crimed, big time.
And this is also, I just want to be clear, this is not me saying that like what Hamas did initially was like justified and like what a cool thing to happen.
God, I hate doing this, Mason.
Right, it's bad.
Because you've got to do this, but this, but this, but this, but this. Well, I was going to say, look, you and I are
both Australians. And I would say, generally speaking, we like Australians. Yes. Generally.
But I would say I'm very confident in saying I don't endorse anything the Australian government
has done. No. Well, our whole country is built on a genocide. Yeah. Literally. And for as long
as I can remember, it's just been human rights abuses and corruption.
Yeah.
If somebody from outside Australia came to me and was like, I hate Australia.
I hate the fact that, you know, you have an island prison concentration camp and you put
refugee children in it.
Yep.
I'd be like, yeah, we do.
I hate that also.
And I also hate the fact that that primarily exists because politicians want to give billions
of dollars to their mates in the private sector to run that in the hopes that when they get drummed out of office
for being bad politicians they can just get a like a like a plum consultancy gig for millions of
dollars which happens literally every time every single time yep but and and look i and i say that
to say we think the jewish people are tremendous we have many jewish friends and colleagues also
they're not a monolith no exactly like any people yeah we have we have jew Jewish friends and colleagues. Also, they're not a monolith also. No, exactly.
Like any people.
Yeah, we have Jewish friends and colleagues and listeners, I presume,
and in my case I have Jewish relatives,
and we don't want to see them killed by Hamas or anyone.
Yeah.
But the government of Israel and the IDF seem to be doing some big-time war crimes pretty blatantly.
I mean, you would have seen the footage.
It's kind of hard to avoid.
Just terrifying stuff.
And look, by their own accounts, they have at this point killed tens
of thousands of Palestinians, including thousands of children.
Yeah.
And that's what we call collective punishment and that's a war crime.
Yeah.
I would say that's too far.
Yeah.
Personally, look, the official stance of the Weekly Planet podcast is carpet bombing
thousands of children is not cool.
Yeah, don't do it.
We're against it.
And look, the only reason – look, I feel like the only reason you could think
that was justified is if you either think that everybody in Palestine is Hamas,
which cannot possibly be true, or you think that everybody in Palestine is Hamas, which cannot possibly be true.
Or you think that, even if you think that every adult in Palestine is in Hamas or is sympathetic to Hamas, the children are not.
They cannot be because they are children and they don't know anything.
Yeah, exactly.
Or you think that Palestinians are not human beings, which they are.
Yeah.
So there you go.
So we're against this.
Anyway, so Segrim 7.
Yeah. And look, again, if you read those comments we're against this. Anyway, so Segrim 7. Yeah.
And look, again, if you read those comments,
it's literally just like speaking about ceasefire and, you know,
and like maybe could we not carpet bomb civilians.
Which is our thing as well.
Yeah.
It's been hospitals.
It's been schools.
It's been neighborhoods.
It's been you should evacuate this way and then they bomb the evacuation room.
Yeah, exactly.
And look, and if you've listened to this, I mean, it shouldn't be. At And look, if you've listened to this, I mean it shouldn't be –
at this point if you've listened to this podcast for more than like a couple of weeks,
you probably know where we're at on this.
Look, if you're like us and you don't know what to do.
I never know what to do.
Yeah, same, right?
It's also because I don't like to learn.
Yeah.
Yeah, but anyway, go on.
You can call your local member of parliament or congressman, senator, whatever it is.
I'm sure you can find a list of resources on the internet
if you want to call.
Look, our official stance is we'd like a ceasefire.
Absolutely.
Which we're in the middle of maybe still by the time this comes.
We'll see.
Yeah, let's –
It's a temporary thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Look, or, you know, there are plenty of petitions you can sign online.
You can go – in Melbourne especially and I'm sure elsewhere around the world,
there's been a bunch of protests.
I've been to a couple of those.
And, yeah, just get out there and, you know, show support for
we don't want to see kids blown up.
Absolutely.
But also if you've heard this and you're like,
this is a personal affront to me, that's on you, I think.
Yeah.
But we love you.
We still love you.
Because we accept everybody.
Yeah, that's true.
Anyway, so what's going to happen with
Screed 7 is, now that she's out and apparently
also... How much of that will get cut out?
Who knows? Let's listen back
and see if we sound like lunatics. Absolutely.
Jenna Ortega was also left, but apparently that's
also... That was reported again because
it was rumoured that she was filming Wednesday.
Something that's been known for a while.
Yeah, and she hasn't said anything.
She hasn't made any statement about it,
so we can't presume that she's doing it in protest or anything like that.
We do know the director was like, he put up a tweet,
he was like, this sucks.
This is my statement from Christopher Landon.
Everything sucks, stop yelling, this was not my decision to make.
So what they're doing now, the producers over at Spyglass,
they're approaching Neve Campbell, who left the franchise,
and Patrick Dempsey, if you recall, is the husband of Neve Campbell
in the movies they made in Screen 3.
So they're going to have to throw a bunch of money at them
to make this happen.
I thought that franchise did really well to lose the star
and continue in the last one.
So they're in a bit of a bind here.
But, you know, you can fire people.
You're allowed to fire people.
So if that's the decision that you want to make.
Maybe our hosting company will fire us.
Maybe they will.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Anyway, what fun discourse.
I love it.
Let's talk about it.
I love being in the discourse.
I love having a platform where we get emails one way or the other
that are like, you should join the discourse.
I'm like, but we don't want to.
We want to keep this in our private lives, quite frankly.
So Superman Legacy got some casting this week, Mason.
A couple confirmed this by THR.
Skylight Gizondo is playing Jimmy Olsen,
and boy does he look exactly like Jimmy Olsen.
Not muscular Jimmy Olsen.
That's right.
They're always giving us a muscular Jimmy Olsen.
He's got a handgun.
He's a secret agent.
I'm actually James Olsen now. Because that's what a handsome man would be called. That's what a They're always giving us a muscular Jimmy Olsen. He's got a handgun. He's a secret agent. I'm actually James Olsen now.
Because that's what a handsome man would be called.
That's what a man would be.
Not in every instance.
No, but a lot of the time, yeah.
On top of that, Deadline are reporting that Sarah Sampeo
is playing Eve Tesmarker.
Is that right again?
Tesmarker.
I think so.
So that's Lex Luthor's like.
Assistant girlfriend. Yeah. Confidant again? Tess Marker. I think so. So that's Lex Luthor's like. Assistant girlfriend.
Yeah.
Confidant.
She's in Superman 1.
Yeah, and she's in Superman Returns, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, she is.
Is she?
Yeah, it's Parker Pose.
Oh, that is her, is it?
I thought it was a different character.
I think it's great.
That's really good stuff.
Let's do some big time research.
Let's do some light research.
But Skyler Gisondo is a great, that's a great get.
Oh, absolutely.
That he is, yeah, people's a great get. Oh, absolutely.
That he is, yeah, people will know from Santa Clarita Diet,
he's also on The Righteous Gemstones, I believe,
although I haven't seen that show.
No, she plays Kitty Kowalski.
Oh.
So I thought she wasn't the same.
I know I feel vindicated in my opinions, all of my opinions.
Okay, great.
And in addition to that, the rumor is that Nicholas Holt is Lex Luthor.
That's great.
Who you might know as the little boy from About a Boy and Nothing Else.
With his little bowl haircut.
Yeah, that's right.
And he's hanging out with Hugh Grant.
He's getting his shoes stolen.
That's right.
That guy's Lex Luthor.
And two decades of nothing, and then they brought him back.
It's a real K. Hui Kwan situation.
Absolutely it is.
I think even if this is true, which it seems to be,
I think he's a great choice.
He's like young. He probably looks good bald, I assume.
And the real-life narrative is he got knocked back for the role of Superman,
which is a very Lex Luthor thing to do.
Absolutely.
Sinister.
Sinister motives is what you're saying this actor has.
That's right.
Revenge.
Oh, my God.
You know what they should do is they should get – what is it,
David Coren Sweat?
What's his name?
Is it David Coren Sweat?
He's looking big as well. Have you seen him? Yeahinne david corinne sweat you should they should they should
get him to throw some chemicals on nicholas holt so he goes bald for real for real you know but
anyway scarlett gisondo great choice yeah he's got that he's got the the jimmy olsen incredible
enthusiasm followed by incredible regret vibe you You know that thing? Where he just barrels into something and he's like, oh, no.
I've gone too far here.
Why did I do this?
Superman, catch me.
He falls off or whatever.
You're sure?
Yeah, yeah.
But also he has a piece of kryptonite on him for some reason.
Why did he do that?
What was this?
Because he's silly.
Sometimes he might.
Oh, I see.
Right.
He's like, what am I doing?
He doesn't know.
But sometimes he knows.
Yeah.
All right.
First of all, stop reading directly from the script of Superman Legacy,
if you wouldn't mind.
What else we got next, Mason?
Dave Filoni.
That's the guy from Star Wars.
That's the guy from some Star Wars, a lot of Star Wars.
He's been promoted to.
No, he's the guy from all Star Wars.
Well, he's been promoted to Chief Creative Officer over at Lucasfilm.
Yeah.
So that's in it.
Like he's kind of did this role unofficially.
Well, here's a statement from him who said,
in the past, in a lot of projects I'll be brought into,
I would see it after it already developed in good ways.
The new role, it opened up to basically everything that's going on.
When we're planning the future of what we're doing now,
I'm involved at the inception phase.
Now, some people like this because he's considered to be like the
protege of George Lucas.
That's true.
He came on board with Clone Wars in 2008 or before that that but it came out in 2008 and he's been like a lot of
the a lot of good stuff you've seen in animated in particular like has come from him has he done
movie stuff uh no he started doing um he started directing some episodes of the mandalorian and
worked with that with john fabbro but ahsoka is his the ahsoka tv series so that's the other side
of it people like that's not a great TV series, is it?
Now this guy is sort of in charge of Star Wars.
But I wouldn't say this is necessarily in charge.
This is just like a guy who's like, well, you can't do that
because that guy doesn't have a laser yet and whatever.
Sure.
That guy doesn't have a laser.
He gets it in return.
James, are you reading directly from the script of Star Wars Episode 10 again?
Correct. Wow. That guy hasn't got a laser yet he's gonna get it later thanks obi-wan kenobi he's
back from the dead so yeah what do you think about that i mean i guess it's good to have some oversight
somebody who's like looking at all of the things sure you know was there not a guy like that before
i don't think so i mean as he, he was kind of brought in afterwards.
Or, like, if they'd go to do something,
they'd have to go to, like, the Canon group and be like,
can we do this?
Does this guy have a laser yet?
No, he doesn't have a laser yet.
No, we've checked Canon.
We've checked the canonicity of this guy.
He doesn't have a laser.
Yet.
Yet.
Yeah.
Wink.
Wink.
Does that wink imply he's going to get a laser?
We can't say.
We would never say.
Yeah. Wink, and now I'm just saying wink my goodness so yeah i mean i guess a good again it is good to
kind of have a i mean uniformity doesn't sound good but sure doesn't sure doesn't yeah when you
when you said uniformity i just imagined like i'm sorry i meant to say conformity that's better
isn't it yeah that's even better when you saidity, I just pictured a big tub of margarine.
What?
I don't know.
Because it's all uniform.
You open the margarine and it's all so smooth and pale yellow.
Not interesting.
I love that a lot.
But what can you do with it?
Yeah.
Spread it on some bread and you can go, I would have preferred butter.
Yeah.
I would have preferred butter, honestly.
I don't know.
I don't even know if they make mayonnaise out of seeds.
I got Vegemite on the knife, then I put the knife back in the margarita.
I can't.
Oh, God.
Yeah.
Star Wars.
Star Wars, exactly.
So, yeah, I don't know.
How do you feel about this?
I don't know.
I think it's the early days.
I like him.
I like a lot of his work.
I think a lot of the animated stuff he's done is really good.
Yeah.
And, like, for Ahsoka, I was like, some of this is really interesting and great,
and others I'm like this is boring well then i guess the question there is
was the fact that some of that is boring is that well i mean is it on you is it on us that some of
that was boring because we're i'm not like on on me so no i think some people salad on it you know
and some people also don't like that a lot of what he's doing is just like well i made this person in
like you know in animated and now they're live action
and it's becoming like his universe.
I don't care because you get that, you get Andor, you get Obi-Wan.
Sure, sure, sure.
And they're all equally good.
Yes, that's true.
You get Book of Boba Fett.
So you're saying that you're largely indifferent to this?
Yeah.
As long as he keeps his grubby bits off Andor?
Yeah, exactly.
Give me Andor season two and then shut it down.
Unless it's bad, in which case do season three.
I guess the question then becomes if he's the chief creative officer,
is he a guy who is going to green light?
Can he green light stuff?
No, he's under Kathleen Kennedy.
Okay, right.
Yeah, which I know you love.
Okay.
Well, then can he, I imagine he can provide recommendations.
Yeah, exactly.
So I guess the question then becomes is he a guy who is like I'm willing to,
you know, I like this idea.
Or you're doing like a Jedi hand wave.
I like this idea.
Give him a laser but not yet.
Not yet.
Let the people wait for the laser, his signature laser.
Do you think that he's the kind of person who will say that that's a good idea, it's not in my wheelhouse,
but I appreciate that other people have come up with ideas around it?
Or is he a guy who's like, doesn't really gel with my vision
of all the stuff that I invented in Clone Wars?
He's always had the opportunity to veto stuff which clashes with him,
but I'm hoping it's a situation where if you've got a Tony Gilroy
who's like, I want to do this version of Star Wars, he'll be like, yep, do it. That's what I'm hoping it's a situation where, like, if you got, like, a Tony Gilroy who's like, I want to do this version of Star Wars, he'll be like, yep, do it.
Like, that's what I'm hoping for.
Where you can still get creative voices coming in and doing something that's not just look at these animated characters.
They're real now or whatever.
Which I'm also fine with.
Star Wars is a mixed bag and it always has been.
And it always will be.
And that's why I love it.
Or I hate it.
Yeah, or it might become worse.
Yeah, whatever.
Uniformly worse.
It's fine, man.
Like, who cares?
Yeah.
Let things get worse.
And then they have to make something new.
Let's go.
Yeah.
Let's do a new thing.
Yeah.
For once.
Star Dureen.
Star Dureen.
Wa Dureen.
Wa?
Is that like Waluigi?
Star Wars Mar Dureen.
Okay.
But also, Waluigi?
Yes.
Yes, sure.
Okay.
Great.
We're just working on these ideas until they become just.
Star Wars movies.
Star Wars movies, yes.
That fly, Mason.
That goddamn fly.
There is a fly in here.
That's true.
Yeah, it's been in here for a long time.
It's really thrown my game on.
Okay.
When you say a long time, do you mean today or do you mean for years?
No, for this segment.
Oh.
I have to talk.
There it's gone.
I'll quickly close the door.
I'm yelling because I realise when I'm away
from the mic
it's not very
doesn't sound very good
that was a smooth transition
back to normal speaking voice
as well
that would have sounded
really good
Mason
are you a fan of all
the Karate Kid movies
slash TV show
and also the Jaden Smith version
no
then you're in luck
my friend
nice
sorry you were in luck
previously because I think
they weren't doing this
but now you're out of luck
because they're doing something which incorporates all of those things oh nerds if this was last, you were in luck previously because I think they weren't doing this, but now you're out of luck because they're doing something which incorporates
all of those things. Oh, nerds. Yeah, if this was last
week, you were in luck, mate.
Okay. Just living in my ignorance.
Sort of liking some
Karate Kid stuff just in my easy chair.
Exactly. Yeah. Walking
around Charlie Brown style in the neighborhood.
Stop walking around Charlie Brown style.
You're going to get invited to too many podcasts.
Yeah, that's true. Jackie Chan and Ralph Macchio are teaming up for a Karate Kid movie.
Now, it's interesting because they both trained different Karate Kids.
That's true.
Though I think Jackie Chan's one taught Kung Fu or something maybe.
Well, yeah, it wasn't that.
Neither of us saw the.
I did.
Did you?
Yeah.
Huh.
Well, wasn't the joke that he was called the Karate Kid?
Like, wasn't it the other kids mocked him and called him the karate kid?
But Jackie Chan would teach him kung fu because that's the martial arts
Jackie Chan is famous for.
Exactly.
Yeah, and whatever country they were in probably for that movie.
So, yeah, so Jackie Chan's character you might think was Mr. Miyagi.
No, his name was Mr. Han.
And Ralph Macchio's character you might think's name is Mr. Miyagi,
but no, his name's Danny LaRusso.
Interesting.
And they're going to team up and –
I thought that whole franchise was really oddly racist.
No, no.
I mean, it is.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
In a good way.
In a way that the Netflix show can poke fun at now.
That's terrific.
So they also announced a global search to find a young actor
to play the main protagonist of the upcoming film.
So they're looking for a brand-new karate kid.
They're looking for the next karate kid but not Hilary Swank.
Who's the next karate kid?
What about one of those just really upsettingly buff,
like, 10-year-old Eastern European kids you see in videos?
I hate those kids.
I don't like them.
And they're all like, and they're lifting barbells,
and you're like, what?
Is this Photoshop?
What's going on?
I hate this.
Breaking cinder blocks.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, I don't like that.
Could be one of those kids, yeah.
Right, yeah. No, it'll be a that. Could be one of those kids, yeah.
No, it'll be a skinny nerd who can do a spin kick or a crane kick.
I understand.
Now, in terms of continuity, like the Karate Kid continuity is kind of wild now on Netflix.
Okay.
Everybody's come back and everybody's fighting each other in a tournament all the time.
Has Hilary Swank come back? I don't think so as of yet.
Okay.
But I think they're going to kind of brush over a lot of that and just be like.
I haven't seen Hilary Swank in anything in a long time.
Is she retired maybe?
No, she was in that movie where like they could have put all the people
on the island and made them shoot each other or whatever recently
and it was like controversial but it was like not that controversial.
Oh.
What was it called?
No idea.
Well, Wikipedia says American actress and film producer
so I guess she's producing mostly now. She better be. She better be, Mason. The Hunt, was it called? Yeah, it was called The Hunt, dear. Well, Wikipedia says American actress and film producer, so I guess she's producing mostly now.
She better be.
She better be, Mason.
The Hunt, was it called?
Yeah, it was called The Hunt, yeah, which I didn't mind, actually.
But there was like all this controversy about like,
hey, this is broken fun or whatever, but it's like, no, not really.
Oh, Logan Lucky, that's the last thing I remember her from.
That was 2017.
My goodness.
It was last year.
Why isn't she doing a karate kid?
Why isn't she doing a karate kid? I'm just looking. No, she hasn't done a karate kid yet. Okay. So was last year. Why isn't she doing a Karate Kid? Why isn't she doing a Karate Kid?
I'm just looking.
No, she hasn't done a Karate Kid yet.
Okay.
So there you go.
So, yeah, why not more Karate Kids?
Sure.
I stopped watching that show last season, season before, but not by choice.
I just stopped, and I think Netflix stopped putting it up in front of me.
Sure.
Do you think we'll get a Jaden Smith cameo?
Potentially.
Do you think other things? I think a lot of things. We're going to cover all the bases. We're going to cover all the things you think we'll get a jayden smith cameo potentially do you think other things
i think a lot of we're gonna cover all the bases we're gonna cover all the things you think
apparently you said it not me who's james telling us everybody what he thinks yeah this is what the
show is oh i've set up a podcast where i tell people what i think about pop culture yeah yes
oh i got my friend Mesa involved.
That's how it happens.
It's like a job for him now and he gets paid for it.
Oh, look at me.
Is that me or you?
I don't know anymore.
Yes.
That's great, actually.
What did you think it was?
I don't know.
I don't know.
So have they established it? How much of cobra kai have you watched probably
the first three or four seasons however many there are wow okay yeah has there ever been any
indication that the jackie chan jaden smith universe is part of this the regular universe
i always just assume that i mean i wouldn't have when i saw it but he was just like mr miyagi again
yeah right he's obviously not obviously not. He's obviously not.
Yeah, it's got some pretty good martial arts in it, that one as well.
And Jackie Chan, actually, he does – there's a scene where he's like – he's drunk and – I don't think he's really drunk, but he's talking about his wife who passed away.
He's actually really good in it.
And there's a scene where he also beats up a bunch of like 10-year-olds.
Nice, good.
And that's fun too.
It's not those muscular Eastern European 10-year-olds.
No, just regular 10-year-olds.
Some of them, they all know Kung Fu, but it's – whatever.
But it's fun. I believe it's fun. know Kung Fu or whatever, but it's fun.
I believe it's fun.
Okay.
And both of us believe it's fun.
And look, obviously what's going to happen is they're just going to meet
by chance maybe at a karate tournament, Jackie Chan and the other guy.
Ralph Macchio.
Ralph Macchio.
But in my heart of hearts, I would like there to be portals.
Sure.
Maybe at a karate tournament.
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, why would Jackie Chan be at a karate tournament when he's a Kung Fu guy? That's a great point. Yeah. There's a karate tournament. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, why would Jackie Chan beat a karate tournament
when he was a kung fu guy?
That's a great point.
Yeah, there's a lot to think about.
Well, in his dimension, there are kung fu tournaments.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, I guess there is.
And I think Ralph Macchio and Jackie Chan,
in their respective universes,
will do a punch on their opponent so big,
at the same time it'll breach the dimensional barriers.
Damn.
And then they're actually punching themselves.
And they're like, what are you doing here? You yeah yeah it's etc yeah it's spider-man he's
talking about making that spider-man movie but with these guys yeah yeah okay great sounds really
good thanks man yeah do you think that's what i think so this week also we had john woo saying
because john was doing uh silent night he's directed the new action movie coming out yeah
yeah and of course they had to ask him the superhero question.
Always.
And he's like, no, no, like superhero movies or whatever.
People are like, this pretentious, this guy, you know.
I love it.
This arthouse director of the movie Hard Boiled.
Face Off.
Yeah, Face Off.
Broken Arrow.
Exactly, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Paycheck.
Wow.
Yeah, all good movies.
Stop reading from the works of Shakespeare, James.
Let's talk about the work of, I don't know.
But I'm just excited for, again,
they're going to ask Jackie Chan about superhero movies
and he's going to be like, I don't see them.
They're going to be like, how dare you?
Is he in one?
I don't know.
Let me check.
I reckon he's probably in like some sort of pre-superhero thing.
Well, he was in like, I mean, he essentially is,
but he did like the tuxedo where he's like a James Bond guy.
Oh, of course.
That's probably, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're right.
He was in Mutant Mayhem.
There you go.
Oh, of course he is.
He's Splinter, yeah.
Kung Fu Panda.
Is he in that?
Oh, yeah.
He's one of the, is he one of the animals?
No, he's just regular Jackie Chan.
Oh, what's he doing there then?
He's just wandering around.
Yeah.
He's like, I can't eat this animated food.
It doesn't work in my, I'm trapped here.
I'm starving.
Did he punch into the dimension?
Yeah, he did, yeah.
He punched into the dimension again.
Like the Spider-Man movie.
Absolutely.
So here we go.
This is by the New York Times.
This is in...
There was a series that was coming to Netflix
called Conquest,
and it was going to be the director of...
who made one movie.
It was called 47 Ronin with Keanu Reeves.
Well, I mean, with that track record, I mean, if he's getting a Netflix show, it must be
a well-reviewed movie.
I have seen it, and it's not.
I barely remember it.
I didn't think it was that bad from memory.
But Rotten Tomatoes says 16%.
Yeah, not great.
But anyway, so his name is Karl-Erik Rinsk.
And so, yeah, he was given $55 million by Netflix to create this new sci-fi series,
right?
And the show was originally going to be a 13-episode run
with an initial budget of $44 million,
and then in 2010 he requested an additional $11 million.
Pound, it says here as well.
Okay.
So it says dollars and then pounds.
It doesn't make any sense where they got this from.
But the filmmaker allegedly blew $10.5 million
from the show's 2020 funding
round on stocks eventually losing 5.9 million he then pivoted to cryptocurrency allegedly using
4 million to buy up dogecoin of that dogecoin that's what he's doing oh he loves those meme
coins yeah my god the director nearly turned this27 million, then reportedly proceeded to spend $8.7 million
on sports cars and designer goods.
That's pretty good.
Nice.
That is good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But Netflix had-
You've got to spend that money to make that money,
you know what I mean?
Very true.
Yeah.
But Netflix, though, didn't receive a single episode
of the series, and it was recently cancelled.
Like, a bunch of stuff has been recently cancelled,
so it's kind of been lost in the shuffle.
He could have got away with this.
Yeah. So a Netflix spokesperson, Thomas been recently cancelled so it's kind of got lost in the shuffle. He could have got away with this. Yeah. So a
Netflix spokesperson, Thomas Cherian
came out and said this. While the company
provided funding and support for Rinske's
series, after a lot of time
and effort, it became clear that Mr.
Rinske was never going to complete the project
he agreed to make.
But here's a fun twist, Mason.
Netflix and Rinske are now
locked into a confidential arbitration
that was initiated by the director himself.
He says that Netflix owes him $14 million in damages
for breach of contract.
Oh, this is great stuff.
Presumably cancelling the series.
You don't often see things like this, Mason.
No.
Just a man openly stealing money.
I mean, maybe it's happening on every Netflix production.
There's definitely like productions
where you've you know money you look at i think even redline immediately did a video on it but
like adam sandler gets 50 million dollars for a movie and then takes all these friends to hawaii
yeah of course why is it more sports cars and then they film it in a pool or whatever
you know which i have no problem with let me just clarify i can't remember who said it was i think
it was made it was it was it was a like a like an old school Hollywood celebrity, I think, who's on Twitter.
Maybe like Steve Martin or something like that.
I don't know who it was.
But they were like, somebody asked him,
maybe it was a producer, but they were like,
somebody's like, why are all these movies all $100 million?
And they were like, well, you can't steal a million dollars
out of a $10 million shoot, can you?
Yeah.
But for $100 million, you can, and people won't notice.
Absolutely.
Or you can invest a bunch of it in Dogecoin.
In Dogecoin.
I wonder if he's up.
Like I wonder if he made, like he's still up.
Like he's well in the green from this.
Some of the other fascinating, so this is from the,
this was the New York Times.
New York Times, yeah.
Yeah, here's some other fascinating things.
Oh, look at Mr. Subscription to New York Times over here.
Must be nice.
So it says, Mr. Rinch financed the production
with his own money at first and hired mostly European
actors and crew members, which reduced costs and
avoided Hollywood union rules. Mamma mia.
The earlier shoots followed punishing schedules.
During a shoot in Kenya, Mr. Rinch
reportedly insisted on filming for 24
hours straight. In Romania, the lead actress
caught hypothermia doing a scene
bare-legged in the snow and had to be rushed to a hospital.
To keep the project going, he secured investment from 30 West
and Keanu Reeves, who came on as a producer,
because he was in 47 Ronin.
Rinch finished editing six short episodes ranging from four to ten minutes.
Okay.
He used them to pitch the big streaming companies
on a 13-episode, 120-minute first season.
Ooh, wait, 120 minutes?
Yeah.
First season? So 13 episodes, 120 minute first season. Ooh, wait, 120 minutes? Yeah. First season?
So 13 episodes,
120 minutes. So like
13 10 minute episodes?
Love it.
That's a web series.
He's got some other behaviours.
He's got some other behaviours, my friend.
This guy. This guy.
He's your mate, isn't he? Yeah, he is. And you endorse him?
Yeah. This guy. Soon after he signed the contract, Mr? Yeah, he is. And you endorse him? Yeah. This guy.
Okay, right.
Soon after he signed the contract, Mr. Rich's behavior grew erratic,
according to members of the show's cast and crew,
texts and emails revealed by the New York Times,
and court filings in a divorce case brought by his wife.
He claimed to have discovered COVID-19's secret transmission mechanism
and to be able to predict lightning strikes.
Wow, is that true, though?
Did he really?
Yeah, he did that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, he's never been struck by lightning, has he?
Predicted it. Yep, that's right. Anyway, pretty good, right? Yeah, though? Did he really? Yeah, he did that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, he's never been struck by lightning, has he? Predicted it.
Yep, that's right.
Anyway, pretty good, right?
Yeah, that is pretty good.
Anyway, so he's fine?
Well, Mr. Rinch declined to respond to a detailed list of questions.
In a recent Instagram post, he said he did not cooperate with the Times
because he expected the article to be inaccurate.
He predicted that it would, quote,
discuss the fact that I somehow lost my mind.
I did not.
Sounds like he didn't.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
And who said that again?
Netflix said he didn't lose his mind.
Yeah, everybody said he didn't lose his mind.
Everybody's very confident he did not lose his mind.
He's looking good, though.
He's got a good look to him.
He's got an on-set look.
He's wearing a waistcoat.
Yeah, that's cool.
He's got a ponytail.
A ponytail.
Looks like a sabre tooth.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'd give him $50 million or whatever.
You reckon you would?
I mean, I don't have it.
I mean, now, even off the back of hearing all this,
would you give him $50 million?
Just to see what he'd do with it, yeah.
Yeah, just to see if he can make 10-minute episodes.
Or see if he can make $10 million out of that $50 million.
Is it my money?
No, it's Netflix's money.
Yeah, he can have it.
Great stuff.
Should we meet Napoleon?
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah, you can have it.
Great stuff.
Should we meet Napoleon?
Yeah.
Wow.
FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret.
The other, a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.
Will you rise with the sun to help change mental health care forever?
Join the Sunrise Challenge to raise funds for CAMH,
the Center for Addiction and Mental Health,
to support life-saving progress in mental health care.
From May 27th to 31st, people across Canada will rise together
and show those living
with mental illness and addiction that they're not alone. Help CAMH build a future where no one
is left behind. So, who will you rise for? Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca.
That's sunrisechallenge.ca. Oh, everybody. Oh, no. You don't like stereotypes?
I love them.
You love stereotypes.
I love them when they're true.
Yeah, exactly.
And the French, let me tell you.
Boy, do they.
Wonderful people.
Wonderful place.
Yeah.
Yeah, I like it, actually, genuinely.
Mason, we're going to talk about Napoleon.
Yes. Big movie of the week.
That's right.
We're not doing Trolls 3, unfortunately.
We'll come back to that next year.
I didn't even know Trolls 3 was out.
It was out.
Oh, it's not out?
I can't remember.
Right. But it might be out.
But look, on a budget of
between $130
and $200 million. Okay.
Alright. It's through Apple
as well. This is going to be an Apple streaming situation.
Okay. So similarly to Killers of the Flower
Moon. So we could have stayed home. Not yet,
because it's not out yet. Right. The box office
in the US alone is looking
to hit about $36 million,
which is not terrible, but it's fine.
But Killers of the Flower Moon, I think it did a bit less than this,
but then it bottomed out.
Right, right, right.
I mean, I like that movie a lot,
but it's almost certainly lost them a bunch of money.
Sure, but I mean, Apple don't seem to be in this for the money.
I don't give a shit.
They are.
They want premium movies.
They want prestige.
They want that prestige that you can only get from a Martin Scorsese
or Ridley Scott, you know?
Ridley Scott, that's right.
He's back.
He's 110 years old and he's still going at it.
He's not.
He's 85 and he's the diametric opposite of Martin Scorsese
because Scorsese is all like, oh, I've got so many regrets
and I'm having a lot of time left and I don't know what I can do left
and I don't know if I've made the right choices in the films
that I've made in my life.
And Ridley Scott's like, I made four movies in between you making
Blail Moon.
I made four movies.
I'll make a million movies.
I'll never die.
I rated them good.
I didn't watch them back.
Yeah, I don't know.
I don't know.
If they're bad, it was the writer's fault.
Well, I think oftentimes with Ridley Scott movies, that is the case.
Because I think in terms of the way that his movies look and are directed,
they're all very good.
Yeah.
Like from that perspective.
I mean, you might be like, Prometheus is dumb.
What a dumb movie.
Sure, sure, sure.
But it fucking looks good, doesn't it?
Sure does, yeah.
Anyway, what do you think the story was?
Oh, come on, mate.
It's Napoleon times.
It is, yeah.
It's Napoleon time.
It's Napoleon time. It's Napoleon time, everybody. It's Napoleon times. Yeah, it's Napoleon time. It's Napoleon time.
It's Napoleon time, everybody.
Give him a moment.
Let him spread his little wings.
That's exactly right.
It's Napoleon time, and very fortunately,
Napoleon's alive in Napoleon time.
It's his time to shine.
It's Napoleon time for Napoleon to shine.
Yeah, and he'll tell you all about it.
That's right.
And so we get, I wouldn't say a snapshot of his life
because it spans many, many, many years.
Probably like 40 years maybe.
It's a series of snapshots and it's like you can't.
A series of battles.
Yeah, you can't, you could not,
I don't think you could encapsulate the entire life of Napoleon
in this three hour, even in three hours.
Yeah.
Also, didn't mind the length on this one.
Yeah.
It felt like, yeah, this is a good three hours.
I'm enjoying this wildly inaccurate movie
when nobody is doing any accents.
Everybody's British.
Really confusing, by the way.
Sometimes it was.
Because where is anybody from?
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah.
I mean, maybe you didn't feel it this time
because it didn't feel like there was an additional movie
tacked onto that.
Oh, that's true.
At the end of it.
Yeah.
And I'm like, I know they got to do Waterloo and Second Exile.
I know what's coming.
That's right.
I know what's coming.
That's right.
Anyway, so it's Napoleon times and it's his life and his loves.
Oh.
And I'll tell you what, Mason.
So a large portion of this movie is dedicated to the love of his, him and the love of his life.
Josephine Bonaparte. And what we really get here is a snapshot of a man who,
just a beautiful, well-rounded individual who's just
a wonderful lovemaker.
You mean a grub.
He's a real ratty little grub, humping away.
That's what he is.
What did you?
No, that's normal.
Oh, yeah.
That's normal.
No, that's normal.
Oh, yeah. He's doing his normal.
I mean, there's a bit of uproar because they're like,
you've kind of made him into a joke and a buffoon and he sucks
and he makes love badly and his wife hates him and whatever.
Well, guess what?
He's dead.
Who cares?
He's dead and, like, you know what?
He probably did fucking suck.
He's been dead for hundreds of years
it's fine all of these guys they all did yeah but again like i can only assume that the because you
know we cover his kind of his his personal life we also cover like the battles that he yeah some
of them that he that he commanded and he participated in all that sort of stuff and
assuming that those are accurate yeah he doesn't seem like a good guy okay okay i do have a list
of inaccuracies which we will get to,
because a lot of this, it's wildly inaccurate.
And Ridley Scott was, like, questioned on this,
and he said something like, look, I don't care,
because the French didn't like this.
And a lot of the French, and he said the French don't even like themselves.
Like, he doesn't give a fuck, like, at all.
It does feel like he does not like Napoleon.
Yeah, right.
Because, you know, I feel like with, like, Gladiator,
even though Gladiator is also, like, wildly inaccurate,
so much of, but it's, but that's kind of like a time period
where people are like, I don't know, Emperor Commodus,
who the fuck is that?
Like, who cares?
Yeah, right.
Like, who's Maximus?
Whatever.
Emperor Commodus, more like Emperor, like, Toilet.
Well, got him.
But with this, like, people know Napoleon, you know.
Also, I haven't seen this, but I want to watch it. I i haven't had time he did a movie in 1977 called the duelist which is set during the
napoleonic era and apparently it's got really really like it's got like um what's his name
uh hubby coitel oh it's got really accurate like period accurate like swordsmanship in that oh i
say it's very good so i might check that out so do you do is it perhaps that that was not as well
received or people have forgotten?
People like it.
I'll do what I want now.
I think that's more just like sword fighting
and this is like battles and cannons.
Let's talk about his,
because he was a master tactician of his day.
We talked about this, right?
But they do not display that here at all.
I'm not saying that he isn't.
He probably was.
But a lot of the stuff he does here is just like,
yeah, just put the cannon there.
Yeah.
I brought more cannons, I think, or more cannon more cannonballs yeah those guys actually didn't even think to bring cannons at all so it's running at me yeah yeah so yeah it is a lot of just like
he shot cannons better than other people because that's his thing i mean that's everybody's thing
in this era you send your troops in on foot you send your horses in you shoot cannons and you do
that in whatever order on whatever terrain,
and that's how you, according to this movie at least.
Until you run out of soldiers.
Yeah, exactly.
And then you are a brave general.
That's right.
I did like, because he does a few of the battles himself,
like he's involved.
Like the first one he does in particular, you see him,
he's like scared and whatever.
He's like, oh, I'm scared, but he's still in there.
He's still among it with his brother and whatever.
And there is a moment where he's wearing his hat straight forward and he goes, hang on a minute, turns it sideways.
And that's how you know he's arrived.
That's right.
You better believe it.
Well, he would have gotten there on his horse
and it would have been streamlined for horse riding
and then he would have turned it for wind resistance.
That's a great point.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
I like Joaquin Phoenix in this,
but I think a problem with this movie is that, like,
nobody's really speaking French, as I mentioned, or, like, doing accents and any of that.
So I did find it kind of like you don't want to, like, just throw in some – just any of that at any point.
You know, it's just everybody's British.
Yeah.
Yeah, but that's the general, like – I know.
The general historical accent is British.
I know that.
But, like, when you're, like, intermingling, like, other countries. Yeah. They accent is British. I know that. But when you're intermingling other countries, they're all British?
Yeah, but I also – because if you – I don't know.
Because people would have different interpretations of, say,
the French accent, you know, all the different actors would.
And so at a certain point you'd be like –
I mean, Joaquin Phoenix could do it though.
Yeah, of course he could, yeah.
He could definitely do it.
I guess you could have him come in and do the French accent and Ridley Scott could be like, okay, everybody model yours off his. Yeah, of course he could, yeah. He could definitely do it. I guess you could have him come in and do the French accent
and Ridley Scott could be like, okay, everybody model yours off his.
Yeah, okay.
Kind of thing, you know?
How much do you think of his rise to power as like right place,
right time and how much was – I mean because somebody's got to get
to the top.
That's true.
Like when there's a revolution, somebody eventually becomes
like the leader.
That's true.
Like how much do you think is just like –
Not in my revolution, everybody would be equal.
Oh, that's great.
Except you'd be the leader.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because I'm the most enlightened one.
Because I came up with the idea that everybody would be equal.
Yeah.
So I'd be on the top.
It makes me wonder like, it's like that idea that, you know,
like master, like, like gunsman.
You know what I mean?
Like, what are they called?
Like cowboy boys.
That's it.
Cowboy boys.
It's like this guy's the best. Gunslingers it's like this guy's the best gunslingers
yeah this guy's the best gunslinger but like statistically somebody has to be somebody has
missed a certain amount of times and got lucky a certain amount of times and there's a certain
amount of skill involved and like and i felt this like for this movie of like he kind of winged a
bunch of this are you trying to moneyball napoleon james is that what's happening here
this version at least.
Okay, right.
Also, I did enjoy this.
I thought it was pretty funny as well.
It is funny, yeah.
It's funny.
I think the battle sequences are really well staged
and they're kind of brussel.
Yeah, I think they are some of the time,
but I think a lot of the close-up hand-to-hand stuff,
there's nothing in here that I, like I think back to Gladiator.
Okay.
And there's like multiple battles in that I could point to
because Ridley Scott of course if people don't know
directed Gladiator, like the opening one in the snow
the bit where like they're fighting in the pit
and there's like the tigers on chains and whatever
the bit at the end where he fights
Joaquin Phoenix and he's been like stabbed
it's a fucking incredible movie
as Napoleon, yeah as Napoleon
he has a time machine
and that's all good, wait which one has a time machine they both have time machines, Maximus doesn't need it he's napoleon yeah he has a time machine um and that's all good which one has a
time machine they both have time machines and they meet in the middle maximus doesn't need it he's
already there but he has one but he's already in the right time period um like i love all of that
but i felt like there was nothing really in here that i went oh that's what about that there's a
point quite early on where a horse gets shot by a cannon okay that was really boy did it really get
shot by really like it's not one of those things where you see the cannon fire
and there's smoke and a horse falls over.
Like, the horse coughs a cannonball right in it and it's twitching on the way.
It's Napoleon's horse and it twitches all the way down.
Horrendous.
And he loves that horse.
And he didn't love that happening because the horse fell on him a little bit
and he was scared.
I wouldn't be scared.
Interesting.
But, you know, that's just me.
I'm built differently.
I wouldn't be there in the first place because I'm enlightened.
That's good too. Yeah. But you felt there was that's just me. I'm built differently. I wouldn't be there in the first place because I'm enlightened. That's good too.
Yeah.
But you felt there was this kind of epic scale to the battles
and the scenery and whatever.
And when his cannons got stuck in the mud, et cetera, and so forth.
Yeah.
But I also thought the supporting cast was really good.
Yeah, sure.
Vanessa Kirby's a great.
She's really good.
Josephine, really good.
Rupert Everett.
Rupert Everett's here.
As the Duke of Wellington.
Here he is.
What's he got on here?
He's got this constant jowly smirk that I love.
He's so jowly and smirky.
Just a jaded awful man.
Absolutely.
He's seen Napoleon's come and go and he's like,
here's another one.
Now I wanted to defer to you for this, but in terms of costuming.
Yes.
Is this something that you.
I mean, this is not my era, James.
I wasn't alive then.
I know it's not your era, Mason.
Okay, go on.
I know you're not 200 years old, Mason, even if he bloody looks it.
Am I right, everybody?
Come on, mate.
Apparently one of the things that everybody agrees on this.
Oh, apparently that also that's Napoleon's subreddit is a fucking nightmare. I bet it is, yeah. People hate this. Oh, really? Oh, yeah, mate. Apparently one of the things that everybody agrees on this. Oh, apparently also that Napoleon's subreddit is a fucking nightmare.
I bet it is, yeah.
People hate this.
Oh, really?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
But if you go to like r slash movies, people are like,
yeah, it's pretty whatever.
That's right.
I never met Napoleon.
I don't care.
There's no alien covenant.
I have a time machine, but I don't use it.
Well, would I?
Why would I mess with any of that?
That's right.
You're responsible.
Yeah, yeah.
Number one rule of r slash movies is you don't mess with the timeline.
Even if you have
a time machine
anyway I liked
all their funny
little clothings
and their trims
and their golden
lapels
yeah I mean
I feel like
I think his earlier
his earlier outfits
are the better ones
yeah these grubbier
outfits before
he emperors up
not even grubbier
but like he's got
he's got like a
like a waistcoat
he's got a couple
of velvet coats
and they have like
kind of embroidered
collars and he's got a navy one and he's got like a burgundy one.
Yeah, yeah.
It's tremendous.
I don't think he's like later era –
and that's probably just the evolution of those French military uniforms,
but I don't think they were as flattering later on.
Fair enough.
If you're just in it for Napoleonic era fashion,
just leave at the hour and a half mark.
Oh, really?
Yeah, just leave.
I want to go beyond that though.
I want to – can I stay for the end of the movie? No. But I'm curious. No, it's not. Oh, really? Yeah, just leave. I want to go beyond that, though. Can I stay for the end of the movie?
No.
But I'm curious.
No, it's not.
Just don't?
No, just don't, though.
Oh, God.
All right, fair enough.
Yeah, I thought the relationship between him and his wife was kind of,
that was a very, I mean, that's like the key of the whole movie, right?
Yeah, absolutely.
It's a little open, like throughout.
But that was, you know, an interesting meeting and just like,
what an awful pair that should break up.
That's right. You know? And, yeah, I mean, there was also moments...
This version at least. Yeah, there were moments in this movie where it's like, oh, why are
you doing that or whatever? And I'm like, oh, because that's actually what happened.
Yeah, there is stuff like that that happened. Do you want to do some historical inaccuracies?
Yes. What else can I... No, I think this like I say this all the time, but I liked all the supporting cast.
I like the – there's some good faces in there.
Yeah.
There's Kevin Eldon who's a British comedian.
He played – he played the Doctor.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But he's in a bunch of –
I want to say he might be in Black Books for a time,
but he might not actually be in – he's in Big Train.
There we go.
He's in Big Train, yeah.
He's in a bunch of stuff, yeah.
He's taking it seriously now, isn't he?
Well, it seems that way.
I'm sure.
But, I mean, that is the trajectory.
It's like –
Olivia Colman.
Olivia Colman, exactly right.
Yeah, yeah.
He was in Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge, Big Train, Brass Eye.
He was in the TV show Merlin.
Yeah, yeah.
These are all good things.
He was in Game of Thrones, apparently.
Game of Thrones.
What the hell?
Oh, he's in Shadow and Bone, recently cancelled.
Oh, my goodness.
Also, Julian Reintut, who was in Hippies with Simon Pegg many years ago.
Okay.
And he was also in Keen Eddie, which is a cop show where an American cop
has to go to England.
Does he like it?
No, he hates it.
It's Reintut? Yes. Who is this guy? No, he hates it. It's Ryan Tutte?
Yes.
Who is this guy?
Let me googs this guy.
Give him a googs.
You'll recognize him when you see him.
Oh, yeah, of course.
I know this guy.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think I enjoyed like all the weird betrayals.
Sure.
Things that really happen.
You meet with somebody and you're like, let's go to our armies together.
Let's all make our families marry each other.
And they're like, this guy just sent 100 hundred thousand troops i mean that's really rude he said he wouldn't he did it but also just like the cavalier nature
just like these horrible fucking people and again this happened throughout history
just killing millions yeah just on a whim for like for nothing yeah just stay in your country
yeah why are you why are you marching around why are you marching into russia what are you doing just on a whim for nothing. Just stay in your country.
Why are you marching around?
Why are you marching into Russia?
What are you doing?
Silly.
And it turned out to be silly.
You shouldn't have done it.
Silly and cold.
Silly and cold.
Yeah, let's do some spoilers.
Look, I don't think it's really – They should have printed T-shirts for the occasion that said,
I'm with silly and cold.
An arrow.
And all the arrows pointed to Napoleon.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, that's right.
Adjustable arrows you can point to Napoleon. That's right. Or it's a compass. I don't know. No, Napoleon has a big pointed to Napoleon. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's right. Adjustable arrows you can point to Napoleon.
That's right.
Or it's a compass.
I don't know.
No, Napoleon has a big magnet on him.
Yeah, nice, great.
Then they don't have to adjust while they're doing their battle.
Exactly.
Because they're too busy being hit with cannons.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm going to say best movie ever.
I don't think it's like Ridley Scott's best.
I think I can understand why you don't like this.
I just thought it was pretty interesting and pretty funny.
It is, yeah. I just thought it was pretty interesting and pretty funny. It is, yeah.
I mean, it's, yeah.
Napoleon, when he wants to have relations with his wife,
he does a thing where he's like,
like, come on, baby.
What a weirdo.
Which might be true.
Might be.
Well, here's the thing as well.
Like, on the poster, there's a big writing credit for David Scarpa.
It's like directed by Ridley Scott and then it says from a screen,
the screenplay is David Scarpa.
And I'm like there's very rarely that much emphasis on the writer,
I think, in any kind of movie like this.
Yeah, yeah.
And I'm just like is this guy, is it in his contract that he's on the posters
or what have you, or is Ridley Scott throwing him under the bus?
Because he's like, I know there's going to be some,
I know there's going to be historical inaccuracies,
and I know I'm going to get flack for it, but if I just go,
look, I just filmed what the writer did.
Yeah, absolutely.
Because he did The Last Castle, The Day the Earth Stood Still,
the remake, All the Money in the World, this movie, Earth Stood Still, the remake. Okay. All the money in the world. Oh, yeah.
This movie, and he wrote Gladiator 2.
Oh, the first Gladiator 2 or New Gladiator 2?
It says 2024 Gladiator 2.
New Gladiator 2.
Gladiator 2, yeah. Oh, my God.
So, I don't know, man.
I can't wait to Gladiator 2 with you.
Great.
Yeah.
So let's do some spoilers.
So I guess in terms of spoilers, if you know anything about his life,
he gets exiled
because he went into
Russia
and he shouldn't have
and they burnt down
Russia
and he's like
oh this sucks
and also he got like
half a million people killed
oh yeah
he killed like half a million
of his own soldiers
yeah that's right
and they don't like him
and then he
so he comes back
and he does a big battle
of Waterloo
but it rains
so he loses
that's right
because he can't move
his cannons
also
well he's exiled
to an island
and it seems very nice.
It looks like a nice Greek island.
It looks delightful.
Eat some olives.
Eat some olives.
Have a brunch.
Have a piñata.
Have a bruschetta.
Eat a piñata.
Eat a piñata.
Eat a bruschetta.
But then he's like, I'm bored and I'm horny and I want to go back
and see Josephine or whatever.
Yeah, man.
Who I've previously broken up with because she couldn't give me a child.
Yep.
And then he goes back and then the soldiers, the army is like,
you can't come in here.
We're not doing Napoleon right now.
That's exactly right.
But then he's like, who's with me to do a Napoleon, soldiers?
And they're like, we're all with you.
It's like, you've got half a million of them killed.
Why are they on your side?
But again, it was the past and it actually happened.
Yeah.
It's wild.
I mean, presumably the people that sided with him forgot.
And they lived.
Yeah.
It was survivorship bias.
They're like, oh, well, we lived.
I also liked how his hairline was receding
and he increasingly like pushed it forward.
Love that, Mason.
Anyway, then he gets exiled again, then he dies.
Yeah, he gets exiled to an old rock.
Yeah.
I reckon I would have said.
Don't exile me to an old rock.
No, what I would have said is.
Rupert Everett, please.
I would have said they would have exiled me to the nice island.
Yeah.
And I would have said, just hypothetically,
if I were to come back and do a big rebellion and attempt to like a coup.
Which I'm not going to do.
I'm not going to do it.
But to be clear, would you exile me to a nicer island or a worse island?
Would you exile me even harder or not as much?
That's right.
By the way, you're not allowed to shoot me.
Yeah.
You have to exile me because I'm rich?
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
You know what?
The money.
Yeah.
The thought I had was like, man, I would love to be exiled
because they give you two million francs a year.
I mean, you have to do this.
And servants and whatever.
And you just get to chill in greece or whatever and
you're like what was it like 18 20 or whenever he was exiled getting a million dollars a year
francs you know like that's what an insane amount of money all you have to do is just
wonder have the bruschetta yeah hit a pinñata, as we mentioned. Look, man, they should have fucking shot him.
Yeah.
But they didn't, and that's the beauty of historical dramas.
It actually happened.
It was stupid.
His people were stupid then.
They were.
Now they're not stupid.
Let's run at these cannons.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
Anyway, I went to historyextra.com.
Okay.
And that's a reliable website.
And this is some.
It sounds like it's suggesting to me that it's like extra stuff.
We've just added on to history.
No, no, this is real.
Okay.
It's slash real.
Oh, great.
That's great.
So here's some of them.
This is not all of them.
So, you know, he says like he came from nothing because he's Corsican.
He's not actually French or whatever.
Okay, right.
He's actually from minor nobility and that gave him the initial leg up.
He's a nepo baby.
Of course he is.
That's the way it goes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Father owned an emerald mine.
Exactly.
Pockets filled with emeralds.
You know the time that he fired into the crowd?
Yes.
And it was like a lot of women and children or whatever was depicted being there.
Sure, sure, sure.
Apparently it wasn't just that.
There were also soldiers and well-armed militia though he did do
that okay point blank fire cannons so this is the point because he he had essentially taken over and
they were like royalists who are objecting to his you don't do it yeah yeah yeah okay so so actually
i wouldn't say to be more sympathetic but it wasn't just in the movie it's just women and
children basically yeah yeah and civilians and civilians yeah but he – yeah, so that's the thing that he did,
which is the thing he often did, fire cannons into people,
but better than anybody else.
That's so true.
He didn't fire on the pyramids.
There's a moment where he's having a battle there
and he shoots it into the pyramids and the rocks fall down
and everyone goes, whoo!
When they had the pyramids fall down, I ask you, you know.
Was it aliens again?
Yeah.
We're coming back to take it back to the top of our pyramids, you know.
So the battle itself actually took place about seven miles away
from the pyramids themselves,
well outside effective artillery range for the period.
Also, it's depicted as, I would say, quite short in this,
not super short.
There's a moment where he has to stand on a box to talk to a mummy.
Oh, that's right, of course.
And they were very effective with camera angles in terms of like
there's moments where he's walking through the royal court or what have you
and everybody seems taller than him.
Yeah, but he was 5'6", which was like standard back then.
At the time, right.
Yeah, so that's pretty cool.
That's all he was.
That is very cool.
A normal height king.
Yes.
There was a moment where.
All praise our normal height king.
Yes, I am normal.
Height.
But I'm not normal in other ways.
No.
I'm a rat.
Yeah.
A root rat.
A root rat.
But I root as pretty much standard as for the time.
Yeah, absolutely.
So there was...
There's a moment in it where he basically baits an army
into coming out across a lake and fires cannons into the lake,
which is a thing that he does.
A frozen lake. A frozen lake. I don't just walk into a lake. No, no. I don't just walk into a lake and fires cannons into the lake, which is the thing that he does. A frozen lake.
A frozen lake.
I don't just walk into one.
No, no.
And they all drown, right?
Apparently there was no great lake.
There was only a handful of fishing ponds.
And apparently Napoleon knew how many people had been killed in this manner because he
ordered the lakes to be drained.
And there was apparently like a handful of people maybe.
And he never intended to trap the Austrian and Russian army on a lake
and seize the opportunity with PR and the propaganda coup
to make it look like it was his idea to do this.
Right.
So this thing, he apparently fuelled the fire of this thing
that happened, that didn't happen, I should say.
Okay, so none of that happened.
Not in that way at least, yeah.
Looked good though.
It looks great.
Yeah.
It made me very reminiscent. Of history? Yeah. Just go, no. Looked good, though. It looks great. Yeah. It made me very reminiscent.
Huh.
Of history?
Yeah.
Just go, wow, epic scale.
That's right.
Through history, I said to people in the cinema.
Epic bacon history.
He never met the Duke of Wellington.
Whoa.
At all.
Never met Rupert Everett.
Presumably the actors in real life met.
That wasn't the green screen.
And these last words were depicted are apparently wrong.
Because he said France something Josephine?
Is that what he said?
Yeah, he said France Army Josephine.
But apparently he said France the Army,
head of the army, Josephine.
Oh, okay.
Which also, like, it's weird.
It is, isn't it?
Head of the army.
Head of the army.
Is that him? Being like head of the army. No, he wanted the Head of the army. Head of the army. Is that him?
Being like, head of the army.
No, he wanted the head of the army to be Josephine.
Oh, okay.
I get it.
Army, France, head of the army, Kurt Russell?
Oh, yeah.
I like that.
Future of cinema?
I'm dead.
But apparently also he didn't come back because he missed Josephine.
She was already dead by the time he was like, I'm doing a big coup.
Got my hat on.
I'm running in and I'm running at you.
So, you know, yeah.
What an awful time period.
Oh, my God.
Except for that exile.
That's where you'd want to be.
Yeah.
Just left alone with servants.
They've given you the yellow tint.
Exactly.
That means cool paradise, you know?
It means cool paradise, yeah.
Oh, my God.
Just retire, idiot.
You're only going to live another three years.
That's exactly right, yeah.
Nobody live past 50.
Relax.
Yeah.
Goddamn.
What a colourful cast of characters.
I reckon I'd join the army.
Why?
And I'd say.
Because it's cool.
What do I have to, like, I'm not saying that I'm going to commit enough crimes
that I'll get exiled to Greece or whatever,
but what would I have to do to get exiled to grace?
Just quietly.
Yeah, like what would take to that line but not over.
Yeah.
You can't shoot me.
Because I'm related to Napoleon.
You're related to Napoleon.
Yeah, exactly.
Does he have living descendants?
I wondered that myself.
Let's check.
Yes.
Oh, what did they think of the movie?
Or are they fascists?
Yeah, they're all fascists.
There's a guy called Jean-Christophe Prince Napoleon
who is the disputed head of the Imperial House of France, apparently.
He would be known as Napoleon VIII.
Oh, if they were still doing royal titles.
But guess what, they're not.
They killed everybody.
They killed all the people that did that.
Yeah.
They were doing that.
Tell you what, though.
I love that idea.
Do you think he's in exile?
No, he's wearing a suit here.
What do you think he does?
Do you think he's – because he'd be rich.
Well, okay, he studied whatever, whatever.
Great.
He has an MBA at Harvard Business School.
Oh, okay.
He worked in 20 –
Got that foot in the door.
Got that buckle shoe foot in the door. No, it says here he did it by himself. Oh, okay. He worked in 20- Got that foot in the door. Got that buckle shoe foot in the door.
No, it says here he did it by himself.
That's great.
He said he didn't even use the name Napoleon, which is his name.
He said he was- here we go.
He worked at a private equity firm for a bit.
Oh, yeah, that sounds about right.
Blackstone Group.
Oh, Blackstone Group.
Terrific.
Yeah, exactly.
Oh, wow.
Runs in the bloody family, it seems.
He lived and worked at New York City as an investment banker for Morgan Stanley and in London as a private equity associate
for Advent International.
He's fluent in French, English and Spanish.
He represents his dynasty's heritage at public events
and ceremonies in France and elsewhere in Europe.
God damn.
There you go.
Love that.
Must be nice.
It must be nice to work for Blackstone Capital.
Must be nice.
I bet the perks are excellent.
Yeah, I bet love it.
So there you go. Get to go to the gold
class lounge at the airport.
Oh my god.
You know what? I thought he'd look more inbred.
He looks like a normal dude. He does look normal.
Yeah. Maybe he's had surgery.
Maybe.
I bet. I don't know anything about this guy.
I hope the media catches up with him and is like,
what do you think of superhero movies?
Listen, if you had to take a shot in the dark, does this guy suck?
Yeah.
You don't know that.
You don't know him, though.
But if I had to take a shot in the dark with a big cannon.
Well, I would never cast stones on this guy who probably sucks.
Sure.
But I would never say that.
I understand, sure.
Should we move it along? Yeah, let's do it. What are we going to talk about? What we're reading. Yep. And then what this guy who probably sucks. Sure. But I would never say that. I understand, sure. Should we move it along?
Yeah, let's do it.
What are we going to talk about?
What we're reading.
Yep.
And then what we're going to read.
Yeah.
I'm doing the thing.
What are we reading today?
Whoa.
Whoa was right.
We're halfway there through the show.
Probably a bit over, actually.
Oh, definitely over.
Great.
Better not be more than an hour left.
I tell you what.
Mason, what have you been reading?
That's a great question.
I'm happy to ask.
I re-watched John Wick 4.
How was that?
Holds up.
Looks good, even on a smaller screen.
Yeah.
Delightful.
Do you think it's the best John Wick or is 1 the best John Wick?
I think 4 is the best John Wick.
It might be the best John Wick.
We've all gone on a journey with John Wick.
Yeah.
You know, it feels like we're on a journey with him together.
Sure.
But I think, you know, at the start of the journey,
I'm like this is the best John Wick because at the time was the only John Wick.
It was in many ways.
And then at the second one, I'm like this is too silly.
Yeah.
And the third one, I'm like this is silly and boring.
And then the fourth one, I'm like no, I get it.
I like the second one. This is cool. The second one is good as well. Yeah, that one was great. I didn like, this is silly and boring. And the fourth one, I'm like, no, I get it. I like the second one.
This is cool.
The second one is good as well.
Yeah, that one was okay.
Had a bit where he went to the desert and cut his dick off
or whatever he has to do.
Yep.
You know he always has to do something weird.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, for whoever's running whatever the thing is.
Sure, yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, this one's got the stair fight, which is an incredible joke.
They should do something other than you have to cut off your ring finger
to prove you're.
Like what?
Something that wouldn't interfere with your ability.
You have to learn saxophone.
Yes.
But quickly.
Yeah, that's right.
Welcome to the table, Mr. Wick.
I slide you a weird coin.
That's right.
Mr. Wick, please.
You've proven your credentials.
But it holds up.
Yeah, yeah, that's true.
And also, I rewatched Dungeons & Dragons,
Honor of the Mice and Thieves.
Because it's free now.
It's free on Paramount Plus, I think.
Yeah, Paramount Plus.
Good for you.
It must be nice.
You have Paramount Plus. Yeah, it must be nice. But Chris Pine. There's no way you don't have Paramount Plus, I think. Yeah, Paramount Plus. Good for you. It must be nice. You have Paramount Plus.
Yeah, it must be nice.
But Chris Pine.
There's no way you don't have Paramount Plus.
I don't know if I do.
I probably might just by accident.
But Chris Pine said that they might get a sequel recently.
He's like, you never know.
Which is someone pointed out on.
Let me just say, if you're in the studio, don't do it.
You shouldn't.
I mean, I would love to see it, but like financially you shouldn't do it.
I mean, I would love to see it, but financially you shouldn't do it.
But also we might be in the last days of just studios getting stupid amounts of money to do stuff that, you know,
maybe direct to Paramount+.
Maybe it is doing well.
Maybe it's doing well on streaming.
So, yeah, I mean, just be like, well, where's the hum?
Maybe this will be the one that kicks off or whatever.
Well, we've given money to everybody else.
Here you go. Exactly. Also, yeah, yeah. Well, we've given money to everybody else. Here you go.
Exactly.
Also, somebody pointed out on Twitter, it's so accurate to real Dungeons
and Dragons in the sense that everybody wants to play another game
but nobody knows when it's going to happen.
Nobody can organise anything.
Very true, Mason.
Very true.
Very true to real life.
I watched a movie on Netflix.
Go on.
It's by a comedy troupe.
It's called Please Don't Destroy the Treasure of Foggy Mountain.
I've heard the name, but what's going on with that?
So it's kind of like, do you remember Mystery Team?
The group that Donald Glover was in.
Donald Glover, DC, Pearson III.
Dominic Dirks.
Oh, there we go.
Yeah, so it feels like that kind of thing.
And then Conan's in it, so it's the three guys.
Oh, maybe that's why I've seen the.
It hasn't like rated particularly well on like whatever the rating thing is, but I thought it was
silly and fun and they've got a good chemistry
and it's absurd and there's some pretty solid
jokes in it. So actually, I quite
liked it. It was just
kind of... This is a fun watch.
There's an actor in this movie and their name is
X Mayo. Whoa! So I'm on
board. You're on board? Yeah. It's got some fun
little cameos that happen in it, you know.
And Conan's like, you don't see him often do some acting.
Doing acting, yeah, you're right.
He's a really fun actor.
Megan Slate is really good.
I don't know if you've seen her on like various social media things.
And now she's like breaking out in more mainstream stuff is good.
John Goodman narrates some but not all of it.
Okay, yeah.
And there's a moment where he's just like, I'm John Goodman or whatever.
Great, okay. some but not all of it okay there's a moment where he's just like i'm john goodman or whatever would you say it's up there with like a um like a hot rod or a never stop never stopping
like a lonely island maybe yeah maybe like their earlier stuff sure okay probably yeah
you gotta start somewhere i think it's fun it might as well be a netflix show with a netflix
movie with conan o'brien that's right they do i think they do like the digital snl skits or
something at the moment these guys but um and they've still got some funny stuff mason with Conan O'Brien. That's right. I think they do like the digital SNL skits or something
at the moment, these guys.
But they've got some funny stuff, Mason.
But, yeah, they've got a good dynamic,
and I wonder which of them is going to be really famous
and the other two disappear.
Interesting.
Or maybe they'll all come up together.
Maybe.
They'll all Leonardo DiCaprio together.
Maybe they'll all be the next major Marvel movie star.
Maybe they will.
So that's all the things.
Oh, and I've been watching Monarch.
Sure.
Because we've been going through the-
The Monsterverse.
The Monsterverse.
And speaking of, I'll talk more about this next week, but Jordan Vogt-Roberts, who directed
Kong Skull Island, which is the last one we talked about, he messaged me and said a bunch
of nice stuff about-
Oh, it must be nice.
It was really nice, actually.
Must be nice stuff.
Must be nice for a God email. Give you compliments. Must be nice. You also got a compliment. Oh, it must be nice. It was really nice, actually. Must be nice stuff. Must be nice for a guy to email you and give you compliments.
Must be nice.
You also got a compliment.
Oh, it must be nice for me.
I mean, through me.
Must be nice for me to hear secondhand that I got a compliment.
Must be nice.
It is nice.
It feels nice.
That's nice for me.
But he told me about-
I can't get out of this voice.
I'm stuck.
I'm trying to be sincere, but it must-
You can just stop talking.
No, I can't.
I can't stop talking.
That's antithetical to the podcast if somebody stops talking.
But I can keep talking when you stop.
I guess, yeah.
It's a good idea.
It's a good idea.
Do you want?
You can wrap up the show.
I mean, we're not there yet.
I'm going to just bang my head on the desk.
Okay, I'm fine now.
I'm back.
But there was no noise podcasting.
Yeah.
It's a mystery.
We removed it in editing.
It's the magic of editing.
But he told me a bunch of stuff that also we got wrong. Oh. It's a mystery. We removed it in editing. It's a magic of editing. But he told me a bunch of, like, stuff that also we got wrong.
Oh.
Also, he CinemaSins'd us, Mason.
Oh, no.
But also, like, some really behind-the-scenes stuff.
But Claire's away this weekend, and I'm looking after the kids,
and I'm doing this, and I've got a mate coming from the UK.
He's a menace.
You know about this.
That's right.
And so I want to, like, go through it properly.
I'll talk about it next week.
Oh, you want to CinemaSins his CinemaSins?
No, no.
I just want to talk about it because I'm like,
this is really fascinating stuff because like it's a fun movie
and there's some stuff where he told me I'm like,
that is wild.
Name one thing we got wrong there.
I can't remember specifically.
Well, if I got it wrong, it was a joke.
Yeah, it was a joke.
But he did agree with you on that cigarette thing when you were like,
as if there'd be no time for a cigarette.
But some of the stuff he told me that like the studio was like,
take that out.
And he's like, why would you like, okay, let's just say this.
They wanted him to take. Does he know we're going studio was like, take that out. And he's like, why would you? Okay, I'll just say this. They wanted him to take.
Does he know we're going to.
Yeah, I asked him.
They wanted to do less John C. Reilly, which is absolutely insane.
Why would you do that?
Why would you get John C. Reilly and not use John C. Reilly?
Yeah.
The man was in War Card.
What are you doing?
Didn't he win an Oscar maybe?
I don't know.
Probably.
Probably for War Card.
Or Chicago or something.
Probably for Chicago.
Anyway, we'll talk about that
next week. I love that. We can't do it
mentioned in the Caravan of Garbage videos for the next
Monsterverse movies because we recorded them
four years ago. That's true.
Yeah. Alright, should we move to the next segment
of the show? And is it the latest segment? Yes, and it
must be nice. What? Now,
the latest segment? Yeah, yeah. It must be nice.
It certainly must be nice. Now, as people know,
I play the latest theme through my phone. Yeah. And it's a new phone. Must be nice. It is yeah. It must be nice. It certainly must be nice. Now, as people know, I play the Letters theme through my phone.
Yeah.
And it's a new phone.
Must be nice.
It is nice.
It's really nice.
But the volume on this is very high, so I've pitched it somewhere in the middle.
Okay.
We'll see what happens.
I like this experiment.
The classic one was too low, Mason.
It's too loud.
I love you.
Some letters that's too loud.
I know they're here right now.
We're going to do that.
It must be nice to be really inconsiderate.
It is.
It's fun.
That was great.
If you do want to reach the show, you can hashtag Weekly Planet Pod on Twitter or weeklyplanetpod at gmail.com.
That's right.
What have you got? Here's an at gmail.com. That's right. What have you got?
Here's an email from Adam.
Adam?
Adam says, wanting to scratch my eyes out watching Caravan of Garbage.
All right.
Hey, guys, I recently had laser eye surgery.
It was hands down the worst experience of my life.
But now you've got laser eyes.
Exactly.
That's cool.
Think about all the laser eye surgery you can do on others with your laser eyes.
That's right.
It's like a pyramid scheme. Or Tupperware.
A laser pyramid scheme. You get your own lasers
and then you... Anyway.
On the first day, I could hardly better open
my eyes, much less look at my phone.
Yeah. And is life even worth living?
No. But I needed some form of content
to distract me from the pain. I'd already
burned through all my podcasts and the only
option remaining was to throw myself at the mercy
of the YouTube algorithm. I never did
that. That's right.
Given my sensitive eyes, this
left me in the awkward position of having to ask my girlfriend to set
this up for me. There was only one thing for it
so I groggily told her to type in caravan
and garbage into the search bar and click the
first video that came up.
She has no idea who you guys are or what
your schtick is so there was more than a hint of confusion
in her voice
when she replied, is Shrek 2 okay?
She followed up with, don't you at least want to start at the beginning?
Anyway.
Yeah, I mean, that's a good point.
And it goes through some of the videos.
The algorithm fed me your absolute slog through Michael Bay Transformers movies.
Listening to you guys process
a similarly awful ordeal gave me an enormous
amount of comfort. Laser eye surgery is very
similar to watching five Michael Bay Transformers movies.
I would be genuinely interested to know if Mesa would
rather watch them again or get LASIK himself.
Oh yeah, have we talked about that?
Did you get LASIK? I don't know if I would.
I think I'm just a glasses guy now. I don't like
anything touching my eyes. I know people
who've had LASIK and they're like, now it feels like there's somebody touching my eyes all the time. Oh my guy. I don't like anything touching my eyes. Yeah. And I know people who've had LASIK and they're like,
now it feels like there's somebody touching my eyes all the time.
Oh, my God.
And I don't like that.
Would you like me to touch your eyes because I'm your friend?
Oh, yeah, then we can get used to it.
I'll come over and you can touch my eyes a couple of hours a day
until I'm used to it.
Anyway, just wanted to say a big thanks for all the hilarious content as always.
We're just happy to continue to just kick girls.
Yeah, that's right.
The biggest compliment I can pay is that I will most likely listen to all these episodes
again, even given the now-associated trauma.
Yeah, it's like when you throw up on a certain type of alcohol and then you can never have
it again.
That's right.
Exactly like that.
You can never eat vomit ever again.
That's right.
Mason, what about this?
Go on.
This is from Nick Saxby, and he says, hashtag weekly planet pod.
I'm glad you've got laser eyes, by the way.
It's cool.
My six-year-old is a fan of superhero stuff, particularly Marvel things.
He's getting great at reading.
I wasn't really a comic book fan.
Must be nice.
Must be nice.
Must be nice to know how to read.
Don't know much about the genre.
What would you recommend him getting started in superhero comics?
Well, actually, I do have a recommendation for that, but I've got to look it up.
Do you mind if I just do that now?
Do a little look up.
I'm going to need 40 minutes.
Okay, you can have 40 minutes.
I'm going to eat this biscuit.
Can I have that?
No.
You can.
You want more?
No, Mason.
I was joking.
I was joking.
God, you don't get me.
I'm funny and you don't get me.
I'm not a classic Mason moment on your podcast.
Your moment is a podcast.
I'm eating a cracker with cheese on it.
Oh, okay, right.
Yum, yum, yum, yum.
Here's a good one I might start with.
So they do this.
I think it's a little bit stale.
Okay.
They do these kids' graphic novels.
There's like a Miles Morales one and there's a Spider-Ham one
and there's a Shuri one and whatever.
And the Miles Morales ones, there's one called Miles Morales Shockwaves
and Miles Morales Stranger Tides. Okay. They just contain stories and it's just Miles Morales ones, there's one called Miles Morales Shockwaves and Miles Morales Stranger Tides.
Okay.
They just contain stories and it's just Miles Morales doing a Spider-Man thing
with my son because we read them together.
Does he help you out with the big word streams?
He absolutely does, Mason.
That was mean, actually.
And so they're like good kids comics to get into.
There's some, I don't know, I've ordered a bunch of stuff.
Like I get a lot of like Ninja Turtles comics for my son.
He likes Ninja Turtles.
So like various anime.
There's a new Ninja Turtles Saturday morning animated cartoon comic book,
which is a continuation of the cartoon from the 80s and 90s.
Oh, interesting.
And that's a fun kids' read as well.
And reading's reading.
Reading is reading, yes.
As a teacher, when I was a teacher, Mason,
that's what I used to say to parents. I used to say reading is reading. And if you want to fight about it, let's step outside. reading's reading. Reading is reading, yes. As a teacher, when I was a teacher, Mason, that's what I used to say to parents. I used to say, reading is reading. And if you want to fight
about it, let's step outside. That's right. Oh, you're bigger than me. I don't want to fight
anymore, actually. That's right. I hope you've learned your lesson. Now you've pulled up to
your full height. I'm scared. But I still believe that thing about reading, unless you raise your
fist at me, in which case I don't. I don't care anymore. So there you go. There's some good ones.
Very good.
What else, Mason?
I don't know because I don't have any kids, so I don't know.
I'd say read Watchmen.
Read Watchmen to your child.
What did you read as a kid?
I mean, it was just kind of like anything, wasn't it?
Anything you can get your hands on.
Yeah.
I mean, there wasn't really.
I got a Batman Ninja Turtles crossover comic.
I got that.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
I mean, there would have been stuff pitched to kids,
but it was really just whatever was at the newsagent.
Absolutely.
I didn't really think about it.
I'm pretty confident I did read, like, The Dark Knight Returns way too early.
Oh, yeah.
And Batman Year One, et cetera.
Absolutely.
Which is a bit of fun.
Bit of fun.
Bit of fun.
Yeah.
Here's an email from Will.
Hi, Will.
Thematically, very similar to the last email,
you guys made my nose surgery less unpleasant.
Thank you so much.
You're welcome.
We were there.
Laser nose.
Oh, my God.
Incredible.
Hey, mate, got surgery done on my nose yesterday and just about to be discharged.
I haven't been able to breathe through my nose or sleep properly for four years.
Oh, my God.
I was only able to get a diagnosis a month ago.
Turned out I had chronic sinusitis, deviated septum, and some big old polyps in my nostrils.
Yuck.
Damn.
How'd they get in there?
I don't know.
Recovery so far from the surgery has been a little rough with all the bleeding,
but listening to your old podcast episodes helped me sleep
and keep my mind at ease.
Thanks, William.
Goddamn, if you're having a surgery, major or minor,
this is the podcast for you.
I think so too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think you should probably just say no painkillers for me.
No pain, no gain.
No. Send the anesthetician away and bring in the podcast, I do. Yeah. Yeah. I think you should probably just say no painkillers for me. No pain, no gain.
No.
Send the anesthetician away and bring in the podcast statistician.
And he can play my favorite episodes from the Weekly Planet podcast.
Oh, my God.
And first incision.
No, I would like some drugs.
Yeah, please.
Actually, I've made a terrible mistake.
Lots and lots of drugs. And also, I realize I don't like that podcast that much.
Yeah.
And when you play it out loud and everyone in the room can hear it,
it's a bit embarrassing.
It is embarrassing, the things they're talking about.
What else?
I've got one more, Mason.
Okay, go for it.
Oh, no, I've got two more.
This is from Shady who says,
May I propose in the spirit of monthbious Madam Webuary?
I love that.
I love it too.
Is that when it's coming out?
Yes.
I mean, if it wasn't, then I wouldn't love it, would I?
I mean, if it's coming out in February.
Shady has thought about it. Yeah. I mean, if it comes out in February, we could love it, would I? I mean, if it's coming out in February. It's shady his thought about it.
Yeah.
I mean, if it comes out in February, we could still do that, I reckon.
Yeah.
Why not?
Wait.
You mean a different month?
Yes.
You can still do it.
Yeah, that's fine.
Because monthbius was this way whenever monthbius came out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What else have I got here, Mason?
I've got one more.
March to March.
What's that?
If it comes out in March, we can call it March to March.
March to March.
Yeah.
March to, like madam. Okay. Yeah. March to, like madam.
Okay.
And web, March, like web.
March to March.
But it's in the font.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The Madam Web font.
Okay.
Which is a pretty basic font, if I recall.
Wow, that's really rude.
It's like a Canva font.
You're going to be eating your words when everybody loves that move.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's from Amanda Mann who says,
Hi-ho, mateos.
It's your old pal Amanda here.
My birthday's on the 28th.
I would just – and it would just make my whole year if you could sing me a little birthday
song or, you know, just a happy birthday will do.
Smiley face, love and gratitude and happiness to you both.
Are we allowed to sing a happy birthday song now?
Is it out of copyright?
We can do our own version.
Nice.
Go on.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to you. Amanda own version. Nice. Go on. Happy birthday to ya. Happy birthday to ya.
Amanda.
Amanda.
Yeah.
But if also it's your birthday and you want this,
put your own name in.
That's right.
Maybe we could just do some names, a list of names.
Yeah, yeah.
Happy birthday, Mace-o.
Happy birthday.
Happy birthday, James.
Yeah.
Happy birthday, Ricardo Montalban.
Terrific stuff, Mason.
Have you got any more?
Are we going to call it a day?
Oh, it's a great question.
I've got a lot of great questions.
You're full of great questions.
Mm-hmm.
I've got a lot of great questions.
God, Mason, I have to go out.
Okay, this is an email from-
I have to go out, Mason.
Okay, this is an email from Blamo.
I'm already feeling it.
Real name.
No, you're right.
You're doing great.
You're full of vitamins.
You're full of vitamins and vigor.
I've been drinking a lot of Hydrolyte.
It's a good idea.
It's a very good idea.
I don't think it stacks.
It stacks.
If you're hydrated, it helps, Mason.
I think you're probably too hydrated.
It stacks.
Look how bloated I am.
Does this look like a man who's overhydrated?
Look at the bottle.
It says symptoms may include bloating and grumpy.
Being a grumpy guts.
My guts are not grumpy.
They're just hydrated.
Hey, James and Mace,
do you ever have moments where a comic's art just completely kills it for you, leaves you incapable of reading it?
I know we all have art we love,
but do you feel this guttural dislike as I do?
Yes.
This happens with me, unfortunately,
with all-star Superman.
That's Frank Quietly. Yeah, okay. He was a very distinctive. I mean with me, unfortunately, with All-Star Superman. That's Frank Quitely.
Yeah, okay.
He was a very distinctive.
I mean, I like that, but I can see why you wouldn't like that
because he looks like a thumb.
Yeah, everybody's sort of thumb-like.
Everyone looks like a thumb in that.
Yeah, I don't know.
Yeah, sometimes Frank Quitely's art does kind of,
I find it a little bit jarring.
It's quietly upsetting for you?
Yeah, it is a little bit, yeah.
Well, speaking of art, we might find it a little bit jarring.
We looked at the comic for Big Sandwich, a book club this week,
at bigsandwich.co, which is our private Patreon service.
We looked at the Four Doctors comic.
It's called Four Doctors.
It's called Four Doctors.
It's in relation to a Four Doctor comic crossover that happened in 2015.
And also there was a new David Tennant episode.
We haven't watched it yet.
But we will probably do the three, I guess.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Or we'll just talk about it roughly.
Be like, yeah, he came back and he did the thing that he does.
He went, blammo, I'm the doctor, and everybody ran away or got evaporated.
I think maybe we've talked about this on our podcast,
The Big Sandwich Classic Comic Book Club.
Good plug then.
But Dave Gibbons, who illustrates Watchmen, I find his non-superhero art.
Kingsman.
Yes.
That's a good example.
I find it quite difficult to navigate.
Because everyone looks like a bland man.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because he's good at making like with Watchmen because there's so many
colourful characters and scenarios, but it's kind of drawn like
very traditionally and that really works well together with all the design elements.
But, yeah, I guess it doesn't always work, does it?
For you, I love him.
But I bet he's done other, like I bet he's done other.
I bet he hasn't.
I bet he's only done one comic and it's The Watchman
and that other one you don't like.
I'm going to look it up.
Oh, you know what?
Also, art, again, I've just been critical of legendary comic book artist
Dave Gibbons, who I'm sure has done lots more great stuff.
Oh, I mean he did The Superman Story for The Man Who Has Everything.
He's done a bunch of stuff for 2000 AD.
But anyway, I guess I prefer his kind of more out there stuff.
I guess that's what I'm saying.
Oh, he did Alien Salvation and Sacrifice.
That's a good book.
He did Rogue Trooper.
Anyway.
Oh, you look like a real idiot.
This guy's actually done a lot of good comics.
Well, I was going to say people that do a lot of tracing.
Yeah.
Not like Alex Ross who will like bring people in and take photo reference.
Yeah, you get life models and whatever.
Life models and stuff like that.
But just people who like trace out of magazines.
So like a – and they just do it with – they just do whatever pose they need.
They just find a random person and then trace them.
Or pornography.
Or pornography.
And so like characters look different from panel to panel
because they're traced from different people.
Anyway, that is the art that upsets me, I think.
You do not like it.
I do not like.
Well, I love it.
I do not like.
Oh, there's a new, speaking of tracing, I was going to say.
If we're going to, I think I might check out,
Marvel has a new Ultimate Universe.
Oh, yeah. How's that kicking off? What's the deal with that? I don't know. I don't know. I think there's check out Marvel has a new Ultimate Universe. Oh, yeah.
How's that kicking off?
What's the deal with that?
I don't know.
I think there's some current issue,
but it's something involving the Reed Richards from the previous Ultimate Universe
and he's made a new universe, et cetera.
Must be nice.
Must be nice.
But Jonathan Hickman is writing a new Spider-Man series.
I don't think it's out yet, but it's out soon.
Oh, my God.
Peter Parker becomes Spider-Man much later in life,
so he's already married and he has kids.
Yeah.
That's a bit of fun.
Whoa.
Yeah.
He missed a window there to become Spider-Man earlier.
That's true, yeah.
It's the best time to do it.
I would hate to be Spider-Man now.
Jesus, on top of everything else?
Yep.
Forget about it.
Bad back.
I wouldn't even do it.
No, my back would be fine because I have Spider-Man powers.
That's true.
Except if I was the Tobey Maguire version, I was a bad back.
That's true, yeah.
But I wouldn't be that version. I'd be unique to me. That's great. Except if I was a Tobey Maguire version, I was a bad back. That's true, yeah. But I wouldn't be that version.
I'd be unique to me.
That's great.
I'd probably be the most iconic version at the end of the day.
That's great for you.
People would be like, finally, somebody did it right.
Finally, somebody's done it iconically.
Finally, someone's been an iconic Spider-Man.
And God, he looks good, people would say.
That's right.
As I swung past.
No, I wouldn't be swinging.
I wouldn't use it.
But some of the Ultimate Universe comics are out now, I think,
so I'm going to check those out.
Okay.
Yeah. Great. But otherwise, that's the end of the show, I think. That is the end of the show. Folks, I wouldn't be swinging. I wouldn't use it. But some of the Ultimate Universe comics are out now, I think, so I'm going to check those out. Okay. Yeah.
Great.
But otherwise, that's the end of the show, I think.
That is the end of the show.
Folks, thank you so much for listening.
We absolutely appreciate it.
Thank you for telling your friends about the podcast.
Yeah, what are you telling them?
Tell them we're good.
Tell them that.
Tell them we're good for surgery.
Tell them secrets.
Tell them we're good for surgery and then stab them.
Yeah.
And then you hand them the iPod.
Yes, that's right.
With us on it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You'll need this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
For your long recovery. That's exactly right. Yeah. And thank you. You'll need this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For your long recovery.
That's exactly right.
Yeah.
And thank you for leaving a five-star review on your podcatcher of choice.
Do it in app.
I'll read them out.
James will read it out.
I've got one here, Mason.
I've got a review.
Okay.
It's from Jtown0921 who says,
My Aussie boys, I can't even remember how I came across this podcast,
but I've been listening for about five years.
Love every episode.
James and Mason have the best banter and are absolutely hilarious.
We're Aussie boys.
We certainly are.
That's why we're so funny.
We're the two most iconic Aussie boys there are.
That's right.
Some people might say Hamish and Andy.
Some might say Daryl Summers and Pluck a Duck.
Some might say Daryl Summers and Dickie Nee.
Some might say Daryl Summers and Red Simons.
Some people might say Daryl Summers and Wilbur Wilde.
Some might say Daryl Summers and John Blackman, cartoonist.
Some might say Daryl Summers and the lady, the Lavinia Nixon.
Thank you, yeah.
But they're all wrong.
Yeah, that's not as good as us.
It's Daryl Summers and a clone of Daryl Summers working together.
But after that, it's us.
And then it's us, yeah.
The best Aussie boys.
What else have we got, Mason?
Or should I say Daryl Summers' cologne?
How else could you be so entertaining?
That's exactly right.
Folks, if you want to get into contact with us,
you can go to weeklyplanetpod at gmail.com.
You can also go to the Planet Broadcasting Great Mates Facebook group
or you can go to the Weekly Planet Podcast subreddit and Discord.
Fun, civil chats about podcasts and pop culture.
Thank you to the moderators over there, Fidel and Maisie and Sarabi.
They also do TikToks and Weekly Planet clips channels on YouTube
and all sorts of stuff.
If you want to follow some people on the socials,
first follow our friend Rob Collings who edits this podcast.
He does all sorts of things, keeping you up to date on all things
The Weekly Planet.
He's at The Weekly Planet on Twitter.
He's at Raw Collings on Twitter.
You can follow me, Wikipedia Brand on Twitter,
Nick Mays on Instagram.
James is MrSundayMovies everywhere.
If you want to support the show, you go to patreon.com
slash MrSundayMovies.
You're chucking a buck for an amount you would not miss.
That's right.
That's the key.
Or if you're a big Richie Rich, if you're a big Napoleon Bonaparte type,
you're in exile and you're getting two million francs a year,
well then the least you could do is pay us nine US dollars per month at bigsandwich.co.
But preferably more.
Yeah.
That's the least you could do.
That's the least.
You could, yeah, if you're on two million francs a year.
Yeah, yeah.
Whatever that is now.
Yeah, whatever.
Probably less than you think.
Yeah, I don't know.
Go to bigsandwich.co.
You've got bonus podcast, movie commentaries, early videos, video game, Let's Plays, all
sorts of stuff.
That's right.
Good times.
Thank you to the Brute and the Bass that's going to rack them for all our musical themes.
If you want a t-shirt, you go to tpublic.com.
You search for The Weekly Planet.
There's some T-shirts there.
Don't worry about it.
I'm looking.
As far as we know.
I want to do Godzilla minus one.
Yeah.
But it's not playing anywhere really good.
Yeah, there was a premiere, I think.
Yeah.
Maybe it was in Sydney.
We didn't go to it.
No.
But hopefully we'll get a generally soonish.
It doesn't look like it's showing anywhere near us.
Oh, boo.
I don't know what we'll do next week.
We'll figure it out.
Oh, look at the Cinema Nova website.
Maybe it's Cinema Nova.
I want to go to Cinema Nova.
It's nice at Cinema Nova.
I want to go to Village Cinema Nova or whatever it is.
Oh, well.
Well, you're in luck because it's not on there.
Can't we just watch Killers of the Flower Moon again?
No.
Can't we just watch Hunger Games prequel again?
Oh, yeah.
Your favourite.
My favourite long movie.
I guess we could do that.
Yeah, cool.
All right.
All right, thanks, everyone.
Grab that gem, you guys.
We'll see you next week.
Bye.
Goodbye.
FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship
between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret.
The other, a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.