The Weekly Planet - BONUS! Best (Not Really) Of The Weekly Planet
Episode Date: January 4, 2016We're taking a week off but luckily RAWCollings has put together a clip show as requested by you guys and cataloged by Reddit user AVC095.Also feel free to check out Derpston's own cut on soundcloud w...ho also did an amazing job at editing a clip show together. BONUS! https://goo.gl/fsGGpzAmazon affiliate link: https://amzn.to/2VljkKuPatreon: https://www.patreon.com/mrsundaymoviesMr Sunday Movies YouTube Channel: https://goo.gl/lB90W2The Weekly Planet YouTube Channel: https://goo.gl/1ZQFGHFind our T-Shirts here: https://goo.gl/q6gE9C Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret, the other a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.
is now streaming on Disney+. Boy, it's sure good to be on this island holiday, Mason.
I'll tell you what, as much as I love hanging out
in your dingy, dimly lit man cave.
Regular room.
The man cave that you have.
Boy, it sure is nice to be out in this tropical paradise.
Just drinking in all the sounds of the beach. How many coconuts? that you have boy it sure is nice to be out in this tropical paradise just
drinking in all the sounds of the beach how many coconuts crack crashing waves
I think it's a crashing waves crabs just enough of a sample of Jimmy Buffett's
margaritaville that we might get sued. Who's to say? Oh, it's great out here.
How many coconuts filled with alcohol have you had?
A lot.
So many. Yeah, it's like that, isn't it?
Yeah, it's just kicking back.
You know? Having the best time.
Could be all kinds of
red-hot comic book movie news
shooting up your butthole.
But there's nothing shooting up my butthole this week.
Not this week. We're on holiday.
Just the sweet hot sand.
Yeah.
Right up there.
It just gets everywhere, doesn't it? It sure does.
The one downside.
But boy, thinking about chafing just gets me thinking about...
Things that irritate you.
Yeah, just gets me thinking about all the wonderful times we've had on this podcast.
Oh my God, you're right.
And instead of just enjoying this beautiful day on the beach,
I think I'm just going to think about them right now.
Can I also think about them?
Yes.
Or should I think about it differently?
No, let's both think about them together.
Okay.
The same memories at the same time.
Okay, good.
Let's do that.
We've been doing this for a while.
We could probably do that.
Yeah, let's just wing it and see what happens.
Great.
Theme song.
Somebody save me.
Don't care how you do it.
Just say it.
Don't react like that.
Look.
Fuck it out.
Theme song.
And they say that a hero can save us.
I'm not going to stand here to wait.
I hold on to the wings of an eagle.
Watch as they all fly away.
And they're watching.
Sorry.
It was good.
It was teamwork.
Do you think that's a better theme song than last week's theme song?
I think they're both the best theme songs.
Do you think people will be impressed or annoyed?
Annoyed.
Cool.
Okay, so this week, in the interest of professionalism,
because this is kind of a thing now,
what I'm going to do is I'm going to sit quietly
and I'm going to listen attentively to the show.
Maybe I'll learn a little something about life.
No song.
We'll see.
Just go.
Just run with it, all right?
Just go.
I'm sceptical but I trust you
That's why we're such good friends
Exactly, yeah
Hello everybody, welcome to episode 3
Of the Weekly Planet
Baby!
I compare you to a kiss
From a rose on the grave
Oh, the more I think of you
The stranger it feels
Okay, that's the last one.
I promise that's the last one.
I'm more than a bird.
I'm more than a plane.
I'm more than
some pretty face
beside a train.
Can we get cancelled?
I guess we can. Yeah. Let's not worry
about it. No. My name is James
Jr. Editor at Comic Book Movie. You may know me as Mr. Sunday. Joining me as always is my
co-host, Nick Chip Danger Cock Mason. Not my real nickname. Hello. Hello, James. Nice
to be here. Hello, listeners. Wow. What a week it's been. You know what? It's our very
special Christmas episode. Is it? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Should we do anything? I do love...
Do you love Christmas? No.
I don't love Christmas either,
but I do love very special Christmas episodes of things.
Like, the more incongruous, the better.
Like, I like it when it'll be like CSI Miami or something like that.
Something where there's horrific murders and awful...
But there's also the magic of Christmas.
Like, you you know a dozen
mall Santas will be
murdered or whatever and they'll be laid out
on slabs or whatever and they'll have
to solve find the killer or whatever
but at the end of the episode it all loops around
and one of the characters is like
but wait a second
if that Santa was locked up
all night in the jail
who ate the milk and cookies off the shelf and then they run If that Santa was locked up all night in the jail,
who ate the milk and cookies off the shelf?
And then they run to the window or whatever and you just hear, ho, ho, ho,
and like sleigh bells jingling.
And the implication is in this world of horrific murder
that Santa is real.
I enjoy that.
So anyway, hopefully.
So Merry Christmas.
We'll have some Christmas magic in this, I think.
Look, I don't hate Christmas, to be fair.
I don't like a lot of the build-up.
And that thing you just said there is amazing.
It is, isn't it?
But yeah.
Who wants to hang out with people?
Ugh.
So I'm just adjusting the microphone.
I'll edit this out.
You won't, though.
I'm not going to.
I'm going to leave it in.
Great.
All right.
So I thought we could start with, you're obviously familiar with the characters of Batman and
Superman.
Yes.
And you're obviously familiar with the movie that's coming out.
I thought for everybody listening at home, and us as well, I just thought I'd go over characters of Batman and Superman. Yes. And you're obviously familiar with the movie that's coming out.
I thought for everybody listening at home,
and us as well,
I just thought I'd go over some facts,
some cold hard facts we know about the movie to be true.
That's what we're about.
Cold hard facts. He's it.
And red hot comic book movie news.
Shooting up your butthole.
That's a new catchphrase, by the way.
Shooting up your butthole? Red hot comic book movie facts. Shooting up your butthole. That's a new catchphrase, by the way. Shooting up your butthole?
Red Hot, comic book movie facts, shooting up your butthole.
I realise I didn't discuss it with you in advance.
Why would you?
No, but I think it's going to get...
Look, all the websites I went to, they were really keen on the idea.
Oh, good.
Excellent.
Buttstuff.com.
Nobody looked that up.
It's probably a real website.
Don't look it up.
Red Hot, comic book movie news. com nobody look that up it's probably a real website if captain america 2 is supposed to supposedly as good as good you can do up that drink bottle it's fine stop doing face. He's doing a real awkward face because he's trying to slightly do up the lid of a Coke bottle.
You're a real dickhead.
But, um...
What was I saying?
I don't know.
That face really threw me.
It's how I do it.
It's the magic of podcasting.
Oh, what the hell was I saying?
Just read your thing.
I don't like reading it.
I'm just going off the fly here.
No, it's all about April.
No, that's right.
I think I'm...
At this point, I'm more excited for Captain America 3
because they have
that much faith in it.
It's pretty cool.
Have they released
any plot details
for Captain America 3 yet?
Okay.
I'm actually a little bit surprised
that they haven't
teased something for it yet.
Probably right, yeah.
But hey, super excited.
If you had to choose though,
opening day,
you can choose one.
You've got a gun to your head,
gun to your balls.
What do you choose? Ah. You know that's because that's the worst case yeah absolutely
yeah yeah yeah you might move your head out of the way but i think what they do that they shoot
you in the balls first let you writhe around for a bit then they shoot you in the head that's true
who would you who would you choose though if you had to um
i reckon i have to go with batman superman yeah me too because we've seen what Captain America can do
yeah
we know his skill set
we know
where most of the potential plots are going to go
yeah
what's the worst that's going to happen
the world's going to be at stake
yeah
like every other Marvel movie pretty much
yeah
so
and we've never seen Batman Superman together
on screen before
no we haven't
so that's it
yeah
me too I mean obviously we're going to see both yeah but hey exciting times though Mason absolutely And we've never seen Batman and Superman together on screen before. No, we haven't. So that's it. Yeah. Me too.
I mean, obviously we're going to see both.
Yeah.
But hey, exciting times though, Mason.
Absolutely.
Exciting times to be alive for something that's going to come out in two years.
Absolutely.
Bleeding Cool, big website.
I believe they're based in London, UK.
Ooh.
They've reported that Fox, 20th Century Fox, have dumped...
Not a fox.
Not a fox.
A fox got into their garbage cans
and just made a real mess of things.
Which they call rubbish bins.
Oh, that's right.
They do.
Fox have dumped
the Fantastic Four director,
Josh Trank,
the cast,
and the script
six months before shooting
will begin on a movie,
on this Fantastic Four movie.
That's a rumour.
That's a rumour.
I don't think that's true.
They said it was an inside source.
Well, funny you say that, Mason.
Mm-hmm.
Because then this rumour was debunked by multiple sources,
including Slash Film and Collider,
saying they're being in contact with their inside sources.
Everyone's got an inside source, Mason.
Yeah.
Except for us.
We don't have...
We've got second-hand inside sources.
We just parrot what others say.
Pretty much, yeah.
Yeah.
But I like to think we put a delightful spin on it.
Like the poster
of Batman eating a bag of poo.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You went to that
on Bleeding Cool,
were you?
Yeah.
I mean,
maybe you'll see him
eating a crumpet
that's been smeared
with like,
like bird excrement
or something like that.
But,
a British delicacy.
That's a nice British spin, yeah.
Yeah.
So, well,
that was denied.
So, I guess that's the end of it, Mason.
Why did...
Or is it?
Sorry, did you want to say something?
I was going to say, why do Bleeding Cool have the...
Why do they think they have the scoop?
Hasn't this ruined their credibility somewhat?
Well, you know, it's hard to say.
This came out Saturday.
Like a bunch of bleeding fools.
Yes.
This will probably...
You know, there'll probably be more info on this
by the time this podcast comes out.
So when everyone hears this, they'll probably be like,
you guys are idiots.
You jumped the gun.
You're ahead of the times, but at the same time, way behind.
Yeah, weird.
But anyway, Bleeding Cool responded to the denials with the following.
We remain confident in our...
No, continue.
They're British.
Yeah.
We remain confident in our source.
Bleeding Cool suggests that if Fox would really like to stomp on the rumour
They should stop approaching
This is really difficult to do
They should stop approaching
Folk to replace the director
And to write a new screenplay
Interesting, so there you go
Did you catch that?
None of it, I was making my little noises
Alright, let's talk about Civil War
Now the American Civil War, that was...
You got me.
Thank you.
I've been waiting for that.
For years, potentially.
That's why on this whiteboard that we put up in 2012,
the top one, it just says,
make a goof on the American Civil War.
And you've crossed it out today i am
yeah that's it good people complain when i know when i spoiled death of captain america that
goddamn flies in here sorry anyway um there's a fly in here guys and now i've stopped no it's
still going i gotta get rid of this. Okay, all right. I can't handle this. Keep it rolling, though. Talk amongst yourselves, guys.
Okay.
He's really awkwardly getting out of his chair.
I don't want to kick any cords.
He doesn't want to kick any cords.
He's found the fly.
He's opened a door.
This fly is moving as far away from the door as you can possibly get.
No, no, you're really messing this up, mate.
I can spray a bunch of fly spray.
No, don't do that.
We're trapped in here.
No.
Done. Did it go? Yeah. Oh, okay. A can spray a bunch of fly spray. No, don't do that. We're trapped in here. No! Duh.
Did it go?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
I thought I whispered it out of here.
Wow, you are amazing.
What were we talking about?
Captain America?
Oh, that's right.
Yeah, yeah.
So, what was I saying?
Death of something?
Uh-huh.
Yeah, often the spoiler
isn't in the title.
The spoiler is more kind of
how it happens in the thing.
Right, exactly.
And the impact of it. How do you kill Wolverine? Well, bullets to the brain won't work, evidently. The spoiler isn't in the title. The spoiler is more kind of how it happens in the thing. Right, exactly.
And the impact of it. How do you kill Wolverine?
Well, bullets to the brain won't work, evidently.
No, it's...
Decapitate?
Just decapitate him.
Throw him into the sun?
He can't have adamantium, like, joints in between his bones.
No, he can't.
Because otherwise he couldn't move.
He'd be a weird statue.
So you cut his head off?
Yeah.
Can he grow back from his head?
Have you reattached his head to his neck?
Does he come back?
I think he would come back from there, yeah.
Because I know he's been torn in half by the Hulk
and he went and crawled to his legs.
Did that series ever finish?
I don't think it ever finished.
I don't know.
So he's still crawling to his legs.
Yeah, Ultimate Wolverine is still crawling to his legs.
He's been doing it for years now.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure that...
Oh, maybe it finished eventually.
But the gap was years long.
Yeah, yeah. Wow.
What a good guy. So, I guess
look forward to that.
As much as you can.
If we've proven anything
in the last couple episodes... Which we have.
We've got... This podcast
is a combination of incredible
enthusiasm, but also just
baffling ignorance. I think maybe
like, I reckon about ten episodes in
I'll have devolved to the
point where I'm just like, oh, who's
the guy? And he's red
and he's blue and he's got
the S. Is it Strongman?
He's very strong. I think it's probably
Strongman.
So yeah, I thought, um, let's start with the
very first Marvel movie. How are we going to review these?
Oh, sorry, I forgot to mention that.
How this is going to work is...
Is it going to be, like, one to ten?
Am I going to do it in stars?
Well, I thought we could do something as technical and complex as that
and give it a numerical value.
Sounds like a lot of work.
Sounds like way too much work.
Also, people get really pedantic if you're like,
I think it's an 8.5.
They'll be like, what is this?
You know.
Yeah.
All caps.
I'm like, thanks, Dad. Yeah. God. think it's an 8.5 they'll be like you know yeah all caps yeah so what we're gonna thanks dad god so i thought maybe we could go you either have to say it's the best movie ever or the worst
movie ever no middle ground so if you really like the movie but you're like ah but there's this bit
that i know worst movie ever fantastic fair enough i think that's because that's i think how the
internet responds to most things anyway so i think why change that operating superl think that's fair Because that's I think How the internet responds To most things anyway So I think why change that
Operating superlatives
That's what I like to do
Extremes
Extremes
And I think it is a testament
To the thousands of people
You know when you watch the credits
And there's thousands of people
Who all have put their heart and soul
Yeah
And their careers
Just on the line
Absolutely
We can just say
Worst movie ever
And you know what
People will
Come at you
I'll come at you
I'm fond of
It's People Looper Here's the thing about Looper and you know what people will come at you I'll come at you I'm fond look I'm
it's
people
Looper
here's the thing about Looper
here's the thing about Looper
look
look firstly
okay so hey
let's say you really liked
mystery films
you like whodunits
yep
and you do
yep
and at the end
you're watching a whodunit
and at the end of the movie
they were like
oh the cop's like and the killer was the butler and at the end of the movie, they were like, oh, the cop's like,
and the killer was the butler,
and you thought to yourself,
the killer couldn't have been the butler,
because he was in the room,
with all the other houseguests,
as the murder was taking place,
and you express that opinion to someone,
and they're like,
you're an idiot,
because that film looked really good,
and the action scenes were good,
and it was tense,
and it was really well acted,
so,
having that opinion,
you're an idiot,
like that, that's Looper.
Because you'd be like, okay, Looper doesn't make any sense.
And they'd be like, yeah, but the action's good
and the performances are good and the special effects are good.
So how about you shut up?
Because, like, I'm expecting a logical conclusion.
There isn't one.
Yeah, I think they managed to get around that
by that very dynasty you were talking about
by the way
don't think about it
shut up
if you think about it
you're some sort of
nerd in a diner
and they don't like that
but I mean like
and a lot of people
will go
you say time travel
can't exist
no I'm not saying
time travel can't exist
I'm saying that they
use the very
how dare you suggest
time travel
sorry I suggested that
haven't you ever seen
one of the Star Treks
I can't think of
Star Trek 4.
Yep.
Where they go back to the 80s.
Your favourite decade.
Nah, 80s are worse than the 90s.
Oh, boy.
Anyway.
They should make a movie about you.
Just me in cinemas just being angry.
Yeah.
Shut up.
Just seething.
Shut your thoughts up.
It's just a one shot of you and you're just seething.
And you just hear thoughts floating around.
Yeah, I don't want to have for lunch today?
I saw Gravity and there was a bit where...
I know, I was there.
Were you?
Yes.
Oh, wow.
You're an idiot.
I really am.
We saw that together.
Do we?
Wait, I actually don't know.
I'm sorry.
You know what?
We probably did.
But you were there and maybe you didn't hear this, but the person next to me said, spoiler alert for gravity,
at the end, she goes into the water, and a frog swims past.
And a person goes, what's a frog doing in the ocean?
First of all, you're a fucking idiot.
That's a lake.
Frogs live in lakes.
And even if it wasn't a lake, shut up.
Then he goes, or it might have been a different person said,
you know when she's in a spacesuit and she's trying to get out
and she's trying to swim
and it's too heavy
he goes
no the spacesuit's too heavy
shut the fuck up
shut up
that's true yeah
I don't care what you think
yep
I have my problems
with gravity as well
but I'm not going to get into it
see and when you're
in your own home
and somebody says
something like that
you can be like
mum get out
get out of my house
why did I invite you over?
I'll just say it clear. I'm sorry if it's
clouded by Mum. I just meant to
supply that. I'm a homeowner.
You are, that's true. So I just wanted to
make that clear. But yeah, so
allocated seating though. Yep.
And when you go in, and especially this happens
in a packed theatre, you go in and there's
a row of idiots in your seat. Yep. And you
go, excuse me, row of idiots, you're in my seat. And they go, oh, but there's of idiots in your seat. Yep. And you go, excuse me, row of idiots,
you're in my seat.
And they go,
oh,
but there's a guy in my seat.
And then I have to go,
yeah,
but if I sit somewhere else,
then I'm you
because someone's going to come up to me
and I have to have
this exact conversation.
Get the fuck out.
Yep.
I'm more polite generally.
You're not though, really.
But that's just,
that really annoys me.
Let me sit where I want.
Yeah.
Normally I'll wait
until the curtain goes down or whatever or the lights go off and then I move anyway. Yeah. really. But that really annoys me. Let me sit where I want. Yeah. Normally I'll wait until the curtain goes down and whatever,
or the lights go off, and then I move anyway.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But you know what?
It should be a free-for-all.
Yeah, it should be.
Who out there, write-in listeners, who likes allocated seating?
Tweet at James.
Don't tweet at me.
Mr. Sunday Movies.
On Twitter.
Tweet at him.
Tell him you like allocated seating.
Tell him in all caps how much you love Allocated seating
Because there must be
People out there
I'm sure there is
I feel like they
Wouldn't have done it
When I was a kid
A very young man
I remember I went to
One of my parents
Friends house
And you know
When you're a kid
I don't know about you
But I hated all
My parents friends kids
Most of them
Because I'm like
Why are you forcing me
To hang out with this guy
Like we have nothing
In common
And when you leave
The room he punches me
Because he's like Three feet taller than me Right okay And he when you leave the room, he punches me, because he's like three
feet taller than me. Right, okay. And he's older.
Anyway, I went to this guy's house, and he's like, what movie do you want to watch?
I'm like, I want to watch Batman. You've got Batman.
You're one of those kids with a TV in your room, and a VHS
player, because you're one of those prick kids
from the 90s. He was like
a villain, like a kid from the 90s.
He wore a little ascot,
and a blazer. That's it. And he was older
than me, and clearly smarter. He kind a little ascot and a blazer. That's it. And he was much older than me
and clearly smarter.
He kind of looked like
Buzz from Home Alone.
You know,
Macaulay Culkin's
older brother
with the pig face.
So he drew out
the whole process of
okay, we could do it.
How about we hold a raffle?
And he cut up
all these little tickets
so he could do a raffle
and he could draw
which one it was.
And by the time
that he managed to do this,
my parents came in
and were like,
we're going to go.
So I missed it.
And if I ever see that guy again,
I'm going to knock
all these fucking teeth out.
Like, legitimately.
Wow.
Wow.
This is your own.
You're going to tie that guy
to a gargoyle,
push him out of a helicopter.
What a prick.
He was also one of those guys
who played the Nintendo.
I see why this movie,
I see why you created this podcast, is to do about nine episodes to cover up what this is, and then you're just going to let loose on all your childhood bullies.
I understand.
I get it.
I get it.
I don't approve, but, you know, do your thing.
Sure.
Anyway, sorry.
He also had a Nintendo, and he'd just play it in front of me for hours.
Huh.
Just be like, no, you can't play.
Wow.
What a jerk.
Yeah.
I remember they printed that in the newspaper.
Uh-huh.
Like the proper newspaper.
Back when we had newspapers.
Back when we used to have newspapers.
Uh-huh.
If newspapers got delivered to my house, there would just be a pile of newspapers out in
front.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, come on, guys.
Which would later become a bonfire.
I hate it when I get the local paper in my fucking letterbox.
I pull it out and I'm like, every fucking week with this shit.
Nobody reads this.
It's like a phone book.
Why are you sending me a fucking phone book?
That's it.
That's all I have to say.
Good.
Well, now we can close out the podcast because that was your vendetta for the week.
It's against local community, apparently.
I just... Yeah, well. It's against local community, apparently. I just...
Yeah, well, I am against local community.
I don't care if you've built a new fucking retaining wall
at the local kindergarten.
What about a skate park?
No.
Are you against a skate park?
Fuck off with your skate park.
Wow.
I hate skate parks.
Do whatever...
You know, build them or whatever.
But I don't care.
Okay, good.
Garbage.
Oh, who's the new mayor? The local shire mayor. Who gives a fuck? You don't care. Okay, good. Garbage. Oh, who's the new mayor?
The local shire mayor.
Who gives a fuck?
You don't do anything.
Just collect my bin and fucking leave me alone.
Am I wrong?
I'm fucking not wrong.
Email in listeners.
This should be your video for the week, I think.
Just about this?
Yeah, absolutely.
God, I'm going to stop.
Anyway, Catwoman.
Yeah.
How did that set you off?
I have no idea. I fucking hate local council. Leave me alone. That's what I'm saying. stop. Anyway, Catwoman. Yeah. How did that set you off? I have no idea.
I fucking hate local council.
Leave me alone.
That's what I'm saying.
Okay, good.
Fuck.
Well, you'll edit most of this out.
It'll be fine.
I hope so, yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
Now, Mason.
Yes.
What started off as a one-off kind of thing has become a recurring segment in this show.
Yeah, nightmare.
Whatever you're talking about is a recurring nightmare.
You're right.
It is the Shia LaBeouf news of the week.
Oh, yes. We got away with not doing it last week. I can't remember if is a recurring nightmare. You're right. It is the Shia LaBeouf news of the week. Oh, yes.
We got away with not doing it last week.
I can't remember if we did.
We didn't.
But silly me thought, that's it.
Yeah, yeah.
He's dead.
Uh-huh.
So, turns out he's not.
But then he made an appearance at some sort of movie premiere with a bag on, he said.
Well, that's it.
He said, I'm not famous anymore.
Yeah.
So, that's how it started.
So, there was a press conference for his movie, Nymphomaniac Part 1.
Oh.
Which, by the way, I've seen a clip for it where he does a British accent in it. And it is, I
can't do accents, even though a lot of people think I'm British for some reason. And then
they call me a dumb British dickhead sometimes. When in fact you are South African. I know,
so weird. And it's got to be the worst accent, British accent I've ever seen. But I think
the director, I think it's Werner Herzog, Matt.
It is, yeah.
Okay, there you go.
He put him in...
Wait, no, it's not.
You're probably...
It's not Werner Herzog.
It's someone else.
Yeah, I can't remember who it is.
But Christian Slater's in it as well, and he also does a British accent.
So I think it's intentional.
What, it's all intentionally bad?
Yeah.
Anyway, I don't know.
Anyway, the point is, he was at a press conference for that,
and somebody said,
what was it like to do all those sex scenes?
And he made this comment before storming out.
When seagulls follow the trawler,
it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea,
which is apparently stolen from some soccer player who did the same thing.
That's amazing.
But the thing is, though, at this point, he's doing it intentionally.
Initially, he wasn't stealing things intentionally, or he was stealing them intentionally, but
then like, but you know, and thinking he was going to get away with it.
But now I think he is absolutely doing it on purpose to go, no, no, this is, I've always
been doing this ironically.
So at some point, we're all just supposed to believe that it's an art project.
Exactly.
Right.
Okay.
That's about, I think that's what he's trying to turn this out into.
And I looked up the clip and the guy in the clip takes a sip of water at the exact same time
that shia labouf did it so it's all very people like well he stole it like this one is clearly
stolen on purpose right okay yeah like a lot of his early stuff he's reappropriating work yeah
there's a lot lars von trier that's it there we go good good look it was foreign something foreign
something from what a south african mate what What a British dickhead. I know, right?
Yeah, and we did get a couple of tweets on the subject.
So many tweets.
Did we go to the Shia LaBeouf, I'm sorry, exhibit?
We can't because we're not in the US,
but I feel if we can somehow convince Shia
that somebody did it before him,
somebody toured an art exhibition internationally before he did,
he'll do it.
Oh, good point.
Yeah.
That's not a bad idea.
So I'm not famous for the bag or the thing.
He went to the film premiere with that bag on his head.
Uh-huh.
Looking like a total dickhead.
Yes.
Shockingly.
And then this art exhibition, which he was threatening us with, he's actually come through
with.
And he sits in a room.
People have lined up for five hours to go in and see this guy.
Uh-huh.
And he's sitting there and the bag's wet from his tears.
And if you go to Screen Junkies, they've got a YouTube channel.
Hal Rudnick, I think, is the guy who does Screen Junkies.
You know, they do the Honest Trailers, those guys.
And he pulled the bag off his head and there's like a five-minute kind of awkward video
where he just talks at Shia LaBeouf and kind of insults him.
And it is Shia LaBeouf.
And it is Shia LaBeouf, yeah.
And Shia LaBeouf is kind of bleary-eyed and kind of crying the whole time.
But you'd think maybe he'd do that on the day he knows the press is coming.
Yeah, I guess so.
Because they would get free tickets, presumably.
So he'd know they were coming and then he'd be like,
well, this is media day, I'll be in the bag.
But then every other day there'll be somebody else in a bag.
Okay, yeah, I get you.
Yeah, yeah.
And you know what, though?
I think the tears are put on.
Because other people have gone in and he's crying.
I mean, not put on, but they're induced by something,
some kind of external...
He pulled a nostril hair out.
Pulled a nostril hair out, something like that, exactly.
Because you can't cry for six hours.
No.
Not if you're the best actor in the world,
and newsflash, he is not the best actor in the world.
Christian Slater is.
Yeah, see, there we go.
So, I don't know.
The very British Christian Slater.
The very British Christian Slater.
I mean, I don't know, man.
What, what?
Let's put another moratorium on Shia LaBeouf news.
Let's do it right now.
I mean.
We can stick to it this time.
Can it get worse, though?
It can't, it can't get.
This must be it, right?
Yeah, because he can't, like, I'm going to kill myself or anything like that.
He can't do that.
Like, that's too far.
Yeah.
Because that will, because that's a serious issue and you can't.
That's true, yeah.
Cross that line.
I mean, you might try to do that.
Yeah.
But I think at this point, his manager or whatever is like, okay, here's the things
you are going to do.
Oh, okay, I get you.
To make it seem as if you are a tortured artist.
Yeah.
But really, you're just rich.
Yeah, exactly.
And a dickhead.
Yeah.
How about something about Fright Night?
Because you mentioned Fright Night, Anton Yelchin in Fright Night.
Yeah.
Here's my favourite Fright Night fact.
Go.
So, Fright Night was
the remake of the one
from the 80s.
Yeah.
And I watched that
in preparation for watching it.
We watched it together.
Yeah, in preparation
for watching the new one.
Yeah.
And I'm like,
there's a character in it
and his name's Evil Eddie
and he's like the
annoying sidekick
of the main character.
And I'm like,
that's fascinating.
There's always,
in the 80s,
movies in the 80s is always like
an annoying side character i wonder what kind of career like an annoying side character has like
does he become the annoying side character in like a series of movies does he grow up and become a
serious actor like he's been in stuff we know so anyway i am db'd him and i've got it here i just
looked it up so after after fright night like he's done a couple more horror films. Good. And then
like in 95,
he did Mechanics by Day,
Lube Job by Night. Wait a minute.
Then he did Virtual Stud.
He did Just 18 and Gay.
Latin Crotch Rockets.
Punk Hotel. Leather After
Midnight. Transsexual Prostitutes.
Motel Sex.
Cockpit.
Manhunt. Transsexual Prostitutes, Motel Sex, Cockpit, Manhunt, Transsexual Prostitutes
2, so that first one was quite
warranted a sequel. Yeah, Buff and Gay,
Black Men, White Men,
Bus Blazer,
Uncut Glory, Leather Buddies,
which sounds quite nice.
They're really creative
these days.
Yeah, they are. Leather Virgin,
Private Temptations, Halfway House Hunks
Gay Men in Uniform
Guys Who Crave Big Cocks
which is
that's a bit
it's a bit much
quite frankly
in 2002
it's a little tasteless
yeah
in 2002
Semen Training Day
what's that?
and then
then he's back
in a regular movie
I don't know how
he did that.
But that's amazing, right?
That is amazing.
Oh, my God.
That's a lot of gay porn.
That sure is.
But good on him.
Good on him.
Good on him for finding his niche.
Exactly, yeah.
If that's what you want to do, good on him, man.
Good on him.
I saw my dogs just come in.
Actually, yeah.
Come on. Out. Leave this in. Good on you, man. Good on him. I saw my dog just come in. Actually, yeah. Come on.
Out.
Leave this in.
Leave this whole thing in.
He's having trouble with the dog.
He doesn't...
Oh.
How did the dog open the door?
That's weird.
God.
Yeah.
Anyway.
He was running around
with his denim overalls
and the butt flap just popped open.
He's like, oh no!
And the dog kept running.
Got a big leg of lamb in its mouth.
Stole all your beef jerky.
I love that dog.
My dad wants to shoot it though.
Absolutely, why wouldn't you?
It's there, it's a dog.
When you have a gun, every dog looks like a dog you should shoot.
That's a proverb.
I'm sure you've heard the fantastic foreign news this week.
Apparently this is a lock, these four cast members.
Michael Jordan, the basketball player.
Incorrect.
Michael B. Jordan, the basketball player.
Also incorrect, but you're getting there.
Basketball.
No, go back the other way.
Michael B. Jordan, the actor.
He'll be Johnny Storm.
Uh-huh.
I think of the casting choices i
think that's the best one i know people like oh he's african-american doesn't work whatever
but i think it's good because it'll annoy people exactly yeah uh so we don't know if him and
sue storm are brother and sister i mean maybe they're one adopted yeah maybe they're from you
know but uh kate mara she's in house of Cards. Okay, sure. She is Sue Storm.
A lot of people don't like this.
I don't know why.
She's just fine, I guess.
But you know what?
It's because that's all anyone can say about Sue Storm casting.
Yeah.
It's either terrible or it's fine.
Yeah.
That's it.
Miles Teller as Mr. Fantastic.
First of all, why is Mr. Fantastic the only one with Fantastic in his superhero name?
Because he's really, really up himself.
Okay.
Yeah, I think that's pretty much it.
He could probably physically do that as well.
Yeah, definitely.
Just get right up himself.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I'm not sure about this guy.
He's kind of got a weird kind of, I don't know, soft face.
He looks very young, yeah.
Yeah, he looks very young.
But from what I've seen, he's a decent actor.
Yeah, and he could be like an arrogant young genius kind of thing.
Can you see the grey in his hair?
Can you see the grey temples?
I think it'll look very artificial.
And the last one is really strange.
Jamie Bell, he was Billy Elliot.
He was in Jumper.
Was he in Jumper?
He wasn't.
He's like the rogue Jumper.
He's Jumper's mate.
Yeah, Jumper's mate. Yeah, Jumper's mate.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He mo-capped Tintin.
He was the mo-cap.
He wore the ping pong balls.
Yeah.
Okay, alright.
He's Ben Grimm.
I'll tell you why it's okay and not okay.
Yes.
Unless you want to say something.
Well, he doesn't look like...
I always picture Ben Grimm, human Ben Grimm, as kind of like your bruiser.
Like Michael Chiglas.
Yeah, exactly like Michael Chiglis.
Before I even knew who Michael Chiglis was, that's how I imagined a human thing.
A human Ben Grimm.
Yeah, exactly.
It won't matter when it's mo-cap, right?
Andy Serkis played King Kong.
Andy Serkis isn't really a giant ape.
No, that's true.
That we know about.
What are you hiding from us, Hollywood?
But as, I mean, obviously they'd probably show him pre-accident.
Yeah.
Which would be a bit strange.
Because he's, I looked up his height.
Not that height matters in movies.
Because people are like, Batman should be at least 6'2 exactly or whatever.
He's like 170 centimetres.
Which isn't very small.
Put that in the Imperial.
How many feet and inches is that?
That's 1,000 yards.
Oh, that'll do.
That'll definitely do it
I don't know
I mean, people did not like
most of the majority of this casting
I've looked up the origin of the Fantastic Four
like the origin panels
Johnny Storm's like
I'm calling myself a human torch
and I'm with you all the way
and they put their hands in
Is his hand on fire when he puts his hand in?
No, he's put it out
He's put it out
Okay, good
Same goes for me
The Invisible Girl
Ben Grimm's like,
Is she saying Invisible Girl or Invisible Woman?
Invisible Girl.
She becomes Invisible Woman later.
Because that's a big point of contention with this as well.
People say,
How dare they call her an Invisible Girl?
That's an insult.
She's a woman.
She's a whole woman.
Initially, she was the Invisible Girl.
There you go.
I didn't know that.
Because I don't read comics from the 60s because they're shit.
That's a really good point.
I ain't Ben anymore.
I'm what Susan called me
the thing.
So that's
that's sad for him.
Then Reed Richards is like
Wait Susan called him the thing?
Yep.
That's really mean.
Yeah.
He's just had a horrible accident.
Well that's all.
It's like someone
loses their legs
and they're like
where'd it go Stumpy?
Yeah yeah.
We're gonna call you Stumpy now.
I mean first she calls him
like an ugly orange
rock skin real prick
but then
and then he's like and I'll call my read richard's like and
i'll call myself mr fantastic so really kick really put the boot in like i'm a monster i'm
mr fantastic so there you go yeah we've all learned something today so would you recommend
that issue issue one of the fantastic four? Probably not. Just look up Fantastic Four Origin on Google
and it'll appear in front of your very eyes.
Absolutely.
You could use this as an audio commentary as well
as you're reading that panel.
Yes, please do.
Okay.
Well, look, Mason, people hate Fox
because they have the Fantastic Four.
They will never give it back.
No.
Why would they? It makes some money. They will never give it back. No. Why would they?
It makes some money.
It makes some money, exactly.
If they gave it to Marvel,
Marvel would probably turn out something really great, I'd imagine.
Not to say that this won't turn out great.
Who's to say, Mason?
I'm going to put my foot down and say it won't be great.
Okay, sure.
The odds are stacked against it, certainly.
You're right.
Good director, though.
Anyway.
Do we know who's directing it?
Josh Drag, Chronicle.
Oh, yeah, okay.
But they did give back
Daredevil and some other stuff
as well.
But I think The Punisher
and I think they
they stole like a bowl of fruit
which they were forced to return.
Oh wow.
It was wax fruit too.
Yeah.
That's the only reason
they gave it back.
Because the Fox executive
was like
just munching down on it.
He's like
what?
And he took a couple more bites
and he's like
This isn't a superhero movie.
I'm eating wax fruit.
Where does this podcast go,
I don't know.
Yeah,
Uncanny Valley.
Do you want to explain that?
Well,
the Uncanny Valley sort of,
we as human beings,
yes,
and we're both human beings,
that we know about.
Oh boy.
We will,
we will accept and we will not find disturbing, say, a character that is like a robot character or a CGI character that does not look at all like a human.
Yes.
So, like an R2-D2 character like that.
He's got kind of human character traits.
You know, he's got a little personality all of his own, but he doesn't look anything like
most of us.
Yeah, exactly.
Precisely.
Yeah.
And then we'll accept.
Can you remind me to put my bins out?
Are you leaving this in?
Yeah.
Dare you.
I just had a thought.
God, I'm...
Last week I had to run out my underwear and put my bin out
and my neighbour's like, hey.
And I'm like, yeah, what?
This is what this is.
Yeah, we'll have to leave this in.
I'll make a note.
I'll make a note in my weekly planner.
I'll put the bins out.
I just caught the truck.
What we reading?
Put your bins out.
Putting bins.
All right.
Do you mean in the morning?
No, tonight.
Because I don't want to
Run out in the morning again
I've written it down
Thank you
What are we talking about?
Uncanny Valley
I'm sorry
It has nothing to do
With garbage bins
Well I thought R2-D2
And garbage bins
And that's how I
Made the connection
You brought it back
I've done it
Yeah
This is nothing
If not an episode
About perfect segways
I know what you mean
Yeah
What about Dobby
From Harry Potter
He's all like, I'm
feeble and weak. My clothes
is a pillowcase.
Harry
Potter. No, I see.
Do you feel at any point that he is a real character
though? Does that character have any weight
to him at all? I remember thinking he looked
okay, but he's in one of the Harry Potters that I don't like.
You know what? He does look good in the last one.
Spoiler alert. I haven't seen the last one.
The second last one. I've seen that one as well.
Where, spoiler alert, if you haven't
seen it, he dies.
He takes a knife to the heart. Wow.
And as he's dying, he's like,
it's good to be friends with Harry Potter.
And he dies. And I guess it is
good to be friends with Harry Potter. One million points to Harry Potter.
I don't normally
give out points, but I give him some points. You know when Dumbledore waves his hands and
the banquet appears? Sure. What he's actually doing, and this is in the books and I know
this. He's teleporting in. He's teleporting the food in. They're all downstairs slaving
away constantly. Literally slaving. Literally, quite literally. And they stoke the fires
and they clean the floors and if that three headed dog gets out they have to put it back
I'm assuming
or they get slaughtered
by the dog
slaughtered by the dog
yeah
why would you put
so many dangerous things
in that school
you put less dangerous
things in a school
I've been to a school
there's very little
very dangerous things
inter-school magic
talk about that
that's my favourite
my favourite part
of the Harry Potter films
is the inter
like the school magic competition.
It's in the third...
No, it's the fourth one.
The fourth one.
That's also my favourite because...
Because it's like a school...
Goblet of Fire.
...of magic, sure.
Yeah.
Where a small child has to fight a dragon.
Well, that's the thing, though,
because his name goes in the Goblet of Fire.
He's too young to be in it.
And they're like,
this is clearly a trick. Somebody's trying to harry potter they're like however let's see
how this plays out how it goes but you know what though he's way underprepared and then they're
like guess what harry potter you're gonna fight this enormous dragon yeah exactly and he's way
out of his depth you had a metaphor for that can you remember what it was it was no i don't do you
you're no you you you said that it's it would be the equivalent of if you were in junior high school and you
were going to an inter-school sports relay and they got you and they put you in a helicopter
and they dropped you into a prison riot.
And they gave you a gun with six bullets in it, but they were like, you're probably going
to die. You might live were like you're probably going to die you
might live but you'll probably die like that's the that's the mundane equivalent of that to it to
assume anyone would survive that at all is insanity i said that you did that's hilarious oh well
oh i'm so funny anyway look here's some movies that i don't like but the cgi it's got nothing to do with CGI, but here's just some movies you don't like.
Okay, but they've got CGI characters that look pretty solid.
Okay.
Actually, I like Stuart Little.
It's a good one.
Huh.
I think it's a good kids movie.
Okay, sure.
Smurfs.
Okay.
Garfield and Garfield A Tale of Two Kitties, the sequel.
Does that have good CGI? For like a weird kind of... Follow-up question. You've seen those movies? No, I haven of Two Kitties, the sequel. Does that have good CGI?
For like a weird kind of...
Follow-up question.
You've seen those movies?
No, I haven't, no.
Okay, right.
And Alvin and the Chipmunks, which again, I haven't seen.
I feel like that's all that kind of same kind of cartoon,
kind of like they've just taken the cartoon version of that
and just kind of made it 3D and been like,
there you go, you dickhead.
You're saying that's good 3D, that's good CGI?
I think it's, yes, for what it is.
Because it's supposed to be cartoony and whatever, yeah.
You don't think Stuart Little looks like a fun little mouse in a little sweater?
He does look like a fun little mouse in a fun little sweater.
He's got a little car.
Doesn't he have a little car sometimes?
He does, yeah.
Does he ever own a little biplane?
Sometimes he's got a plane.
That cat doesn't like him very much, though.
No.
But I think they work it out at the end.
Yeah, great.
Yeah.
Great.
Or the cat kills him.
Oh.
What's his deal, Stuart Little?
Is he an orphan?
What is that?
I think he is an orphan.
From where?
Why are there not other mice walking around with sweaters?
His parents were killed in the Holocaust in the graphic novel series Mouse.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Remember Mouse?
I don't. Mouse. It was a metaphor Mouse. Oh, God. Oh, God. Remember Mouse? I don't.
Mouse.
It was a metaphor for...
Oh, no, I do know that.
Sorry.
Yes, I do.
Yeah, I apologize.
It was a metaphor for the horrors of World War II.
Yeah, that's really good, isn't it?
Yes.
Apparently, I should read that.
Anyway, I'm going to assume that he's from that universe.
Okay, gotcha.
I'm going to say the Stuart Little universe and the Mouse universe are the same universe.
There you go.
Yeah.
Fair enough.
Do you think Stan Lee knew when he was making that cameo that they were going to be making fun of him?
That's a good question.
Yeah, I would say so, yeah.
He'd be okay with it.
I think, yeah.
But I can't imagine they'd put him aside and be like, listen, we're going to make out that you're Chitty and your wife and you're a creepy old man.
Right.
You cool with that?
Uh-huh.
That's just a thought.
Last question.
Should people be grabbing dat gem?
Yeah, grab dat gem.
I don't know, man.
No, make it.
What if you're one of the chosen people?
Why not?
Don't take the chance.
No, take the chance.
You're in space.
What's the worst that could happen?
I mean, explode.
You might explode.
But you probably, like if you're in space, you find yourself in space, you're probably
destined for a great thing. So just grab that gem.
Good point. You got it. That's a new sign off
by the way. Grab that gem.
Hashtag grab that gem.
Nice. It's better
than eat them eggs. Absolutely. Because
they enjoy your burrito. It's similar.
Absolutely. And I can't remember how I made that reference.
This one I'll
definitely remember.
Definitely.
You know one thing that strikes me as odd about this universe?
And now that I think about it, it kind of strikes me as odd in a lot of movie, like Hollywood and TV movie things.
People are really okay with other people calling them on the phone all the time.
It's weird.
It's like, oh, somebody's calling.
Hey, what's going on? Oh, I've got to make a somebody's calling hey what's going on oh I gotta make a call hey what's going on we're all making
calls texting was invented because calling somebody on the phone is really
annoying and painful and nobody likes to do it I don't think we ever talk on the
phone yeah you ever have sometimes we call each other's home phones though
don't we sure yeah and there's nobody manning them so yeah but i would like to see a
scene in a movie sometime soon if somebody is listening you can make this happen yeah where
there's somebody in there running in terror from the what you know from the murder or whatever they
bump through their assholes yeah and then they're like i gotta i gotta call my buddy you gotta make
this call and then they dial they put the phone to their ear and it just cuts to somebody like
in their apartment holding their phone at arm's length like, oh.
Do I?
And then it's real, like it's one shot real time
and they just let it, they put it on their desk
and they let it ring out to voicemail.
And then they check their Facebook
and they check Twitter and Instagram.
Then they pick the phone back up again and they text back,
oh, hey, I'm real busy, can't talk.
Can you text me what it is, if it's urgent? And then it cuts back. Then they send the again and they text back oh hey i'm real busy can't talk can you text me what it
is if it's urgent and then it cuts back then they send the text and it cuts back to like it pops up
on the person they're dead on the ground they're just holding the phone so that's like a five
minute sequence yeah absolutely i wasn't gonna say was it five seconds no no i was gonna i do
that to people that i like like phone rings and I'm like, nah, can't, can't do it right now.
Because,
yeah.
Nobody calls anybody,
is what you're saying.
That's what I'm saying,
that's weird.
That's a fair point.
Maybe PIs call people more.
Yeah,
that's probably true.
I'd say it's probably
more emails than anything.
That's true.
Yeah.
Gotta nail it down in writing.
But if you do text messages,
you've got to show the phone
and you've got to,
and then,
I find this really difficult
with the terrible editing that I do. When you show text text how long do you show it for because how long does it
take someone to an average person to read it exactly yeah so i have no idea i think i i think
i'm quite a fast reader i'm probably i probably skim more than i read right i would even say
so i i feel like i always get that wrong like i always do it too fast and then i don't know
anyway yeah the point is
put your phone away
just bloody text
not you
okay
but I've got all
my show notes
do you want to talk
about Ghostbusters
do you want to do it now
I suppose you can put it in
yeah
well there was some
set footage
we got the full team
photo of the Ghostbusters
correct
the new Ghostbusters
what did you think
of the new Ghostbusters
looks great
yeah
people were like
oh why aren't they smiling?
Are they not smiling because the movie's terrible?
No because
Is that true? Yeah.
There's just, I don't understand. Why are people so
determined to hate this film?
Maybe they're not
smiling because they've just been fighting
a whole, they've been busting a whole bunch of ghosts and they're tired.
Do you remember the first movie? They're not smiling at every scene just been fighting a whole, they've been busting a whole bunch of ghosts and they're tired. Do you remember the first movie?
They're not smiling at every scene, are they?
They start as like these, you know, scientists and whatever,
but by the end they're just these blue collar like pest controllers or whatever.
Yeah, yeah.
Look, I'm going to say it one more time and then I'm never going to say it again.
I don't believe that.
No, I just, I really love the first Ghostbusters.
It's one of my favourite movies.
It's true.
I've seen it more times than probably any movie, No, I just, I really love the first Ghostbusters. It's one of my favourite movies. It's true.
I've seen it more times than probably any movie.
Except for one time I saw Police Academy 6 like 24 times in a week.
I need you to explain that.
No, it doesn't matter.
It's better without context.
Anyway, but yeah, I really like it.
Plot's good.
Characters are great.
Acting's great.
Special effects still hold up.
Yep.
Dry wit, it's great.
Yep.
I didn't like... Two?
Two as much. Yep. It's fine. Yep. If you really love it, good didn't like 2 as much. It's fine. If you really love it,
good on you. It's great. It's fine. I thought it retreaded a lot of ground in the first
one. But when the second movie came out, it didn't make the first one not exist anymore.
That's true.
The first one's still there. And the same can be said about this new one. When it comes
out, whether it's good or bad,
the first two are still going to exist.
Correct.
You can still get them on DVD and Blu-ray and streaming and blah, blah, blah.
The only difference will be that at some point in the future,
when you're talking to somebody about your favourite movies,
you might have to spend an extra second clarifying
that you mean the original Ghostbusters movie and not the remake.
Or part two.
Or part two. Or part two.
Or the video game.
Exactly.
So if those combined, like, extra 30 seconds
in the remainder of your life
is worth a sustained hate campaign
against the entire cast and crew
of this new Ghostbusters,
fine, you've made your choice.
So, secondly, this is the last time I'll say it.
Last year at the Astor Cinema in Melbourne,
they did a special screening of Ghostbusters,
like a very historic cinema.
They did a special screening of Ghostbusters.
Ivan Reitman was there.
Was he?
He did a Q&A.
This is last year?
Yeah, he did a Q&A.
Everybody dressed in costume, had a great time,
you know, that sort of stuff.
At exactly the same time, Dan Aykroyd was in town
spruiking his Crystal Head vodka.
He went to Costco and he, you know, the vodka insider Crystal Skull.
Yeah, I know it.
Yeah, okay, great.
Anyway, those two events did not clash,
but Dan Aykroyd did not go to the Ghostbusters screening
because he's checked out of the concept
and he doesn't care about the fandom anymore.
Yep.
You know what I mean?
Sure.
Bill Murray only does projects that he is personally interested in
and he has repeatedly and publicly said
that he's not interested in doing Ghostbusters anymore.
And shut up.
And shut up.
Sigourney Weaver has been burned on sequels so many times
she's probably not going to do this one rick moranis quit uh acting to look after his family full time um
alder amos is dead he's not coming back yeah so we are never gonna get the movie that you want
even if you got even if dan akroyd called you up and said, hey, I read your Ghostbusters sequel fan fiction on the internet.
I want to collaborate with you to make a Ghostbusters sequel.
We're going to get all the remaining cast that are alive.
We're going to put them all together.
We're going to get new cast.
It's going to be the same continuity in the same universe.
They're going to pass the torch to the new Ghostbusters.
It's not going to be the same movie.
No, definitely not.
It's going to be a different movie.
It's going to be Blues Brothers 2000.
It's going to be Blues Brothers 2000. It's blues brothers 2000 it's gone the moment's gone but the movie the original ghostbusters
still there you know what so stop complaining get over it you know what if those set photos showed
jonah hill and chatting tatum and kevin hart yeah and you know, and Josh Gad, or whatever,
no one would give a shit.
Right.
Do you know what I mean?
But because it's women and whatever,
I think that's really the problem here.
Right.
But, you know.
Anyway, you can still bloody do your cosplays or whatever,
write your fan fictions.
It's fine.
You dumbass.
Yeah.
Next question.
Have you ever tried to transform
one of the new Transformers from the movies,
like the actual toys?
I thought you were going to say have I ever tried to transform. Have you ever tried to transform one of the new Transformers from the movies, like the actual toys?
I thought you were going to say, have I ever tried to transform?
Have you?
As a child and then like a couple of weeks ago.
Sure.
Yeah, have you ever had a go at one of the new toys?
Yeah, I think you loaned me one.
It wasn't mine, it was my brother's.
Oh, right.
It was like a finger trap.
Who bought it as an adult, we should point out.
It was like a finger trap.
Yeah, yeah.
Like it's, maybe I'm an idiot, but I remember the mega lock simpler. We're definitely idiots. It was like a finger trap. Yeah, yeah.
Maybe I'm an idiot, but I remember the Megalodon. We're definitely idiots.
Okay, good.
Okay.
Do you think they should introduce a Transformer called Optimus Prime,
and he changes into a moose or a bowl of moose?
Yeah.
Good.
Both.
He can be a triple changer.
We have the technology.
He becomes a moose, the animal, and a bowl of moose.
Yes.
Two options.
Do you think in the new movie
there will be a bit
where a human falls really far
and then a Transformer
catches him
at the last second
in a big robot hand?
Definitely.
Yeah.
This isn't a question
but I'll frame it as a question.
Okay.
Let's do a...
Sounds like a threat
more than anything.
Go ahead.
Let's have a Starscream
impersonation competition?
Okay.
You ready?
You go first.
Wait, I'll go first.
Mighty Megatron.
Megatron.
Okay, good.
Write it, listeners.
Yep.
Who was best?
In fact, figure out who was who.
Why would most people wouldn't even know?
Okay.
Would you rather see... This is the last question even know okay would you rather see
this is the last question
okay
would you rather see
I like that that's
his only memorable thing
that he says also
I like how we both
prepped for it as well
like clear the throats
I made a stance
like I was a Shakespearean actor
would you rather see
Michael Bay
Transformers movies forever
or they cancel it
we never see another Transformers movie?
Michael Bay Transformers movies forever.
Okay.
Because, you know.
Better than nothing?
No, not even that.
I just want to see how ridiculous they go.
Sure.
If he had to keep making them
where would that go?
Yeah, yeah.
Fair point.
Okay.
Well, I wasn't going to say that, but you've changed my mind.
I agree.
You were going to say no more Transformers movies ever?
Yeah.
Because, it doesn't matter.
I would say statistically he has to produce at least one good film at some point, right?
Yeah, but also statistically you could do this forever
and there has to be a director who just makes terrible movies forever.
That's also a good point.
You're absolutely right.
If we're going to bring statistics into it, basically.
There has to be a successful movie director who just...
Never makes a good movie.
Yeah, never makes a good movie.
You're right.
Absolutely.
Where did I put my keys?
Do you know?
Doesn't matter.
I think I left them in the cinema.
Oh, well.
Doesn't matter.
But anyway, yeah.
You did run here.
They're fine. We've got Wahlberg. We, well. It doesn't matter. But anyway, yeah. You did run here. They're fine.
We've got Wahlberg.
We've got the Michael Bay girl character.
Yeah.
This isn't a spoiler because it's irrelevant to the plot.
And we're going to get to later scenes that could have been cut out because they're irrelevant to the plot.
Sure.
But there's a scene.
So Mark Wahlberg, the dad, he's like an inventor.
He's a wacky inventor.
He's an American inventor.
American inventor.
From Texas. There's some missing backstory to this character, though,. He's a wacky inventor. He's an American inventor. American inventor. From Texas.
There's some missing backstory to this character, though, because there's a lot of, like, he's
got a lot of, like, logos for his company, like something something robotics and whatever.
That's true.
Like, did he own a robotics company at one point?
Or did he always work out of his garage?
Yeah, yeah.
Anyway, it doesn't matter.
But anyway, so he's an American inventor.
He's got a 17-year-old daughter.
Yes. doesn't matter but anyway so he's he's an american inventor uh he's got a 17 year old daughter yes
who is who we find out soon because it's not really spoiler that he's that she's dating a
20 year old guy guy and there's an entire scene where all three of them have an argument over
whether or not it's legal for those two to date and it ends with the boyfriend producing from his wallet a card
with the relevant legal statute in texas that enables him to have sex with her
why is this in the film i have two theories i did think that i'm glad you brought this up
right one is that like michael bay likes two things in his films he likes
escalation like he likes the action to be bigger every time yeah and he likes barely legal tail
right he likes those two things and i think what happened theory one is he's combined those two
things and he's gone you know what we've had some barely legal chicks in these films in the past
what we're going to do is we're going to have a chick who is so barely legal that in certain states she's in fact illegal.
And it's only due to this dude finding some legal loopholes that he can bang this chick.
Which he carries with him.
How awesome is that?
That's theory number one.
Or theory number two is one of the producers on the film has a kid who is 17 and dating
a 20-year-old or 20 and dating a 17-year-old
and all his friends are like toughing and being like,
what are you doing here?
What's the deal here with your kid dating this other kid?
It's weird.
And he's like, no, no, it's legal in certain states.
And they're like, whatever, man, you're an irresponsible parent.
And he's like, you know what I'm going to do
is I'm going to find the relevant legislation
and I'm going to insert it into a multi-billion dollar movie franchise.
Into a movie that already goes for 165 minutes.
Yeah, that'll show you guys.
So they're my two theories because otherwise completely irrelevant and a waste of time.
All right.
How about here's a weapon for you that I thought of.
How about the ultimate nullifier?
I don't know what that is.
Okay, so basically when Galactus first showed up on Earth.
Is it his big stick?
No, it's like a little handheld thing.
I'll find you a picture.
I think you're thinking of a telephone.
I'm thinking of the telephone.
That's a great weapon.
Yeah.
You clock a guy with a rotary telephone,
you're going to knock out all these people.
Man, if we're talking about comic book weapons,
Russell Crowe knows how to wield a telephone, let me tell you.
I mean, only against hotel porters and stuff.
People who deserve it. Yeah, definitely. I'll be honest, the Ultimate Nullified does look a little bit wield a telephone, let me tell you. I mean, only against like hotel porters and stuff. People who deserve it.
Yeah, definitely.
That's what you're saying, yeah.
I'll be honest, the Ultimate Nullify does look a little bit like a telephone.
Now that I've...
In your face, mate.
Yeah.
Does a Galactus helmet do anything?
Nah.
That's the Ultimate Nullify.
There it is.
Okay.
It's an Ultimate Nullify.
What does it do?
Anyway, basically, look, here's how it works.
I'll find you a diagram in a second.
It's important. You can have a look at all the internals. Yeah, I found here's how it works. I'll find you a diagram in a second. It's important.
You can have a look at all the internals.
Yeah, I found one.
There we go.
But basically, Galactus was about to eat the Earth.
Just about to tuck in.
Yeah, about to tuck in.
And Reed Richards is like, hmm, I better put a stop to that.
And so he goes up to the moon and he talks to the Watcher.
And he's like, how do I stop Galactus?
Whatever.
And the Watcher's like, I can't how do i stop galactus whatever and uh the watch is like i can't
interfere but there's the ultimate nullifier and he's like oh great he's like what yeah help it
does all these things and here's the instruction manual but i can't interfere well thanks for
nothing i'm gonna turn my back as the watcher i'm gonna i'm gonna stop watching for a second yes and
if i turn back
and the ultimate nullifier
is gone
I ain't going to ask
no questions
and Redridge is like
what do you mean?
Help me out here!
Come on!
But basically
like
it's
depending on
the version you hear
it's like an artifact
from the previous
version of the universe
and so it can kill
Galactus
so it's power
basically
if you wield it
you can destroy anything you can think of what's the reception like on it
like two bars most of the time yeah what's my previous universe yes that's not gonna be great
two bars is as good as you can get but basically you can like use it to destroy anyone or anything
yeah but unless you have the willpower,
it will kill you as well.
It will utterly annihilate you.
Does it kill Reed Richards?
No, he doesn't use it.
He threatens people with it.
Oh, just waves it about. He threatens Galactus with it
and then he just threatens everybody with it.
While I'm here.
Yeah.
While I've got you.
Franklin, clean your room.
I'll set up a nullifier.
I've got it.
I'll kill you.
I'll kill me.
I don't care.
I'm a bad father we've established that
yeah man
yeah he's not a good person
yeah yeah yeah
so he just waves
at a Galactus
and Galactus
buggers off
yeah pretty much
do you think
they would have worked
on that cloud
that came down
in the Fantastic Four movie
I think maybe
just one element
of the cloud
okay sure
he'd be like
oh and then he'd destroy it
and he'd be annihilated
and they'd be like oh you got rid of one one element of the cloud. Okay, sure. He'd be like, oh, and then he'd destroy it and he'd be annihilated.
And they'd be like, oh, you got rid of one cubic foot of that cloud.
That's pretty good.
Yeah.
What if we're talking... Here we go.
Here's the bloody panel, mate.
No, Galactus, it is you who will perish.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, yawn.
And then Galactus is like, the ultimate nullifier in the hands of a human.
Actually, you know what?
The ultimate nullifier was on Galactus' ship now that I think about it.
Oh, okay.
Shouldn't have carried it around with him.
No, probably not.
Should have buried it.
Yeah.
Or kept it on him.
You know what he should have done?
How big is this thing?
It's like put in a man's hand.
So how big is Galactus in that panel?
I think he's like 30 feet tall.
That's pretty big, I guess.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah.
It's big as ass.
How's he eating a planet if he's 30 feet tall?
But I reckon what he should have done is maybe gone to the beach
and put it in one of his sneakers.
And then nobody would have found it, right?
Because nobody ever finds stuff that you put in your sneakers
you take to the beach.
You swim all day.
Yeah, that's right.
No worries there.
Maybe you'll steal your phone.
Pretty good.
Well, that's good.
I'm glad that that is a weapon that exists.
Oh, yeah.
Well, if we're talking ridiculous weapons,
we're all in application, I would kill myself with that.
Oh, definitely.
We're not.
I don't have the willpower for that.
Yeah.
It would just,
it wouldn't even destroy anything else.
But then again,
the ethos of this show
is grab that gem, man.
Oh, yeah.
So what I'm saying is
if you get your hands
on the ultimate nullifier,
you're probably destined for greatness.
So just try and destroy something with it.
Who would you kill?
And I'm not talking like,
I'd kill a terrorist or whatever.
Right.
If you had to kill like a celebrity,
who would you kill? Oh, Ryan Seacrest? kill a terrorist or whatever right if you had to kill like a celebrity who would you kill oh ryan secrest i was gonna say right because we talked
about him earlier right i have no problem with ryan secrest yeah exactly he's probably a really
nice guy yeah well how else are we gonna kill yeah yeah totally oh god well look yeah ridiculous
weapons that could do anything or whatever the infinity gauntlet i was actually before we do that
um the chance of accidentally killing somebody
with the Ultimate Nullifier, though, very low.
Okay, sure.
You need to be specific.
Very specific.
You can't kill any bystanders with it.
Yeah.
Unless you throw it at them.
Yeah, I guess so.
You hit them in the temple.
And it's never really clear how the Ultimate Nullifier
kills that person.
Do you see it in use?
It literally explodes into a small sun or something.
That would be pretty great.
No, I don't know.
I've never...
No.
You never really see anyone killed with the ultimate nullifier.
Somebody send in a panel.
Oh, no.
Here's somebody bursting into flames.
Isn't it?
Great.
There we go.
How good's that?
It's pretty good.
Bang.
Looks painful.
We should email that to Ryan Seacrest.
Yeah.
You're next, buddy.
Your ass is grass, Seacrest.
McG!
I wanted to ask you,
because I think you mentioned this a couple of weeks ago.
Who do you think is the definitive...
Yes.
...perfect choice for a person role in a comic book movie?
It's J.K. Simmons as J. Jonah Jameson. That's the best.
It is the best one.
Like, whatever. You know, you'll see
a comic book character
and you're like, I wonder who would be great for that? And you see him on
screen and you're like, yeah, that's pretty accurate.
Dead on. No matter what you think of J. Jonah
Jameson, he's bloody nailed that. He's nailed that
role. I mentioned the last time we talked
about this, I want to see a J. Jonah Jameson
film. It's two hours, it's just a shot
of him sitting at his desk and he's just yelling at people
that come in. And maybe there's like explosions
behind him, like out the window, maybe Spider-Man's
fighting Dr. Octopus or Hobgoblin or something like that.
It doesn't matter. It's never
referred to. It's just him yelling at people
and like maybe, like knocking
his phone off the computer off his
desk because he doesn't understand it and then
that'd be great.
Yelling at his wife over the phone.
Do you care whether it's set in the Tobey Maguire universe or the current universe?
Ah, no.
It could even be set in the real world.
It's just yelling.
It's fine.
I would see that forever.
So that's the greatest casting ever.
Yeah. But at the same time, in those movies, I think Tobey Maguire, terrible choice for Spider-Man.
I know you're not alone in thinking that.
Is it his mopiness? It's mopiness.
He's, I see, he's kind
of like, he's got a, you know, chubby
boy face. But he doesn't strike,
he never at any point strikes me
as a high school student. No.
Just a chubby, boy-faced
man who's in a high
school for some reason.
Even though Andrew Garfield was older than Tobey Maguire when he was in his version.
Maybe it's the hair.
It might be the hair.
He's got great hair in that.
He does have great hair.
Andrew Garfield definitely looks like that.
But he's only a student in that very briefly.
Or a high school student anyway.
But yeah, it was a...
I wouldn't say it would put it down so much to his performance
as in some of the writing for that character.
He's not very fun.
No, he's really not fun, yeah.
Credit, or do credit for him
for working out like a mad dog for that movie.
Like a mad dog.
Yeah.
Same movie, Spider-Man,
original Spider-Man,
for best.
I think the first one was called
Spider-Man, original Spider-Man.
It's, uh... I think Willem Dafoe is an excellent green goblin.
Yes, he is.
Even though the costume's not great.
Terrible costume, I was just thinking that today.
But he is amazing.
Yep.
And I would even say, what's the guy on the second one?
Alfred Molonia?
Yep, that's the one.
That's also really good.
But Willem Dafoe, what a great choice.
He nails the dual characteristics.
Yep.
He's got that weird goblin head he's got a goblin head see exactly they could have just they could have just had
some sort of like thin kind of membrane over his face and be like that's for soldiers in
battlefields and it protects against gas attacks or whatever yep but they had to do robot face well
the funny thing is though they actually tried an animatronic goblin face. And there's videos of it online, and it looks
a lot like the original kind of
60s green goblin. Uh-huh. Does it work?
Yeah, well, I mean, uh...
It's hard to say. I mean, it's only test footage.
Right. It's interesting. Hmm. It's better
than a motorcycle helmet. Yeah, it's true.
Does it look like... Does it look like
Willem Dafoe? No.
Not in any way. But neither does a motorcycle
helmet. Does it look like him either.
Good point also.
Yeah.
He's brilliant.
What a great dude.
And he pops up in the other movies as well.
Yeah, yeah.
I've got one for good.
Okay.
Gary Oldman, Commissioner Gordon.
Good.
Fantastic.
Yeah, great Commissioner Gordon.
He would fit into any Batman universe.
Like if you made a more comic book-y kind of Batman universe, Commissioner Gordon is
always grounded.
Always a guy.
Always a gruff kind of moustachioed gentleman. Would you watch a film where
Gary Oldman as Commissioner Gordon is doing
a press conference
and J.K. Simmons
as J. Jonah Jameson
is in the press pool
because all his reporters have called in sick
for some reason and he's really annoyed
that he has to go out into the field
and interview Gary Oldman
and it's just a back and forth fight between the two.
How good would that be?
I'd watch that.
That would be amazing.
Are you kidding me?
You know what?
That and it ends with...
You know what?
There's a series of scuffles.
It's two hours long and there's a series of scuffles throughout the film.
Definitely. I would watch that.uffles throughout the film. Definitely.
I would watch that.
Greatest movie ever made.
Definitely.
That's the best reason to cross over anything ever.
I think so.
FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship
between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret.
The other, a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.
Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a spider can.
Spin the web, sub to sub, don't subscribe. Punching guys, does whatever a spider can. Spinning web, subbing, subbing, don't describe.
Punching guys, hit somebody with a brick, cause you're Spider-Man.
Web a guy to a building, hit him with another building.
Cause you're Spider-Man, inexplicably strong.
The Amazing Spider-Man.
There's a bit in that movie where peter parker after he fights the lizard
yep and he goes to kurt connors who is the lizard yep who he knows has been working with lizards
right and regrowing yeah exactly and he's like uh excuse me dr connors and the doctor turns around
and he's kind of he's kind of thinning on one side of his hair and he's got like scales down his neck
and he's like like he's like that and he's like like he's like that
and he's like
could you tell me
how to kill a giant lizard
and he's like
why do you want to know
about lizards
lizards are the
they're the greatest
and Peter Parker's like
I wish I was a lizard
I am a lizard
and Peter Parker's like
okay that's interesting
alright
alright
makes sense
and then Connors leaves
and then you think I thought when I saw this oh he's tweaked Parker's like, okay, that's interesting. All right, all right. Makes sense. And then Connors leaves.
And then you think, I thought when I saw this, oh, he's tweaked.
Yeah, because he's just playing along.
But then he looks down and he sees a rat that he was experimenting on, or a mouse,
and he sees that it's turned into a half-lizard, half-rat.
And then you see him go, oh my God.
And not like the penny dropped.
Why did it take that point, the penny dropped?
You're supposed to be smart, Peter Parker.
Rant over?
Yes.
Okay, having not seen it, does he, does Kurt Conner's arm, when he becomes human again,
does his arm drop off?
Yeah, his arm drops off. Okay, right, right, right. Maybe that's it.
But he's talking about limb regeneration and all this kind of stuff.
You know what it is? It's missing arm. That's the thing. It's like Clark Kent's glasses.
It's like...
If you see someone with scales on their neck
ranting about lizards
and how great lizards are
and how lizards have no natural presence.
I have no defence.
As one of the producers of the film, I apologise.
I've got another thing from The Amazing Spider-Man, though.
Okay, great.
There's a bit at the end
where the lizard decides
that he wants to turn everybody in the city into lizards.
Fantastic.
Because he loves lizards.
Yep.
He launches, basically, the lizard gas into the air.
What is lizard gas?
And, well, he's going to, in like a,
well, it's essentially, it's like a mortar.
And it launches into the air,
and then everybody would get gassed.
And because he's like,
lizards are the best,
and everybody should be a lizard.
And Peter Parker's like,
why does he keep saying this?
God, what do you mean, Dr. Connors?
And so, basically, obviously obviously Peter Parker stops you.
It's a terrible plan or whatever.
But he's supposed to be an incredibly intelligent man.
Being a lizard is not the best.
Being a lizard is worse, for one.
Also, it has been proven that the lizard gas is not permanent
because he keeps reverting back to his human form.
So that would have lasted maybe 24 hours.
And then everybody
would have turned back
and go,
remember that time
I turned into a lizard?
Yeah.
It was pretty wild.
It was fucking weird.
Yeah.
So,
that's another thing
I don't like.
Logical fallacy.
There you go.
You got one?
I got one.
Let me think of one.
How about
Dark Knight Rises
wants to deal with the pit?
Oh,
the one he gets thrown down.
Yeah,
the pit that he gets thrown down.
Yeah. Are there guards up the top?
Nah, because he gets out. Where's the food come from?
Do people deliver
food? That's a really good question.
And there's, who put the pulley in?
Where'd the pulley system come from?
And if there's a pulley system,
why can't they
build some stairs?
Yep.
You get a guy, you wrap him in the
rope, you pull him up,
and then he cuts some holes in the
side of the wall, and you
do that for a couple of weeks, and you've got
some stairs, and then you just walk up.
And they check, the guards
that deliver the food,
do they check the wall every week?
And they fill it in with putty if you've been cutting stairs in the wall.
Maybe.
Shut up.
No, it's fine.
Maybe it's like a self-exile.
What?
It's not.
No.
You know what, I feel really bad that I didn't think of that.
I feel like an idiot.
You get some wood.
Like, there's stuff there, right?
There's stuff at the bottom of the...
You cut a hole and you put a bit
of wood in and you've got a step.
And then you do it
again and you've got another step.
And then you get up to the top and there's no
guards. So then you go
and you get some more rope or something.
But you know what is up there? There is a rope that he just
drops in. There is a rope sitting there.
Great.
So Augusta Windung is going to...
Could have saved them all, yes.
That's amazing.
Unless it's a metaphorical pit, in which case I apologise.
It's not.
No, okay, it's a literal pit?
Okay, great.
Great.
Well, that makes...
I don't understand why people are...
People are banging on about how did Batman get back into the city
he's Batman, he's got to have a way in
there's a thousand ways he could have got back into the city
he would know, he knows the streets
and the secret tunnels
he's very street wise
he's a street shark
we ready to do the thing?
this week we're going to do a versus episode
we're going to do a bloody versus
the famous weekly planet scissors versus episode. We're going to do a bloody versus. The famous Weekly Planet Zzzz versus episode.
We've done it two other times.
Two other times.
Heroes versus heroes.
Then villains versus villains.
Now the random grab bag.
Whatever.
Whatever we think of.
We got hundreds of these.
Yes, we do.
So I'm sorry.
I obviously couldn't pick them all.
So in this week, for anyone who hasn't listened to the previous episodes listeners have sent in people to or individuals or groups you know comic book pop culture characters they
want us to fight yep we will determine who is the winner that's right uh and the rules are the rules
are what happens is the two characters will appear in the weekly planet battle world which as we've
established is a standard sizesize American football field.
Let's say, so nobody gets an advantage, let's say it's in Wisconsin.
Okay.
Go Packers!
Woo!
Are you sure that's where they're from?
Look, I don't know anything about football, but once I saw the Super Bowl...
Super Bowl.
Once I saw the Super Bowl...
Thank you.
And like 30 seconds of it, and all the fans had big wedges of cheese on their head and
I think I'm on board.
You're on board.
Absolutely.
Okay.
So they appear opposite ends of that.
Yep.
And then what they do is they determine that the other person's a threat.
Yep.
And then they act as accordingly as they would to subdue that opponent.
Correct.
That's right.
So Deadpool probably shoot to kill.
Yep.
And then Batman aimed to incapacitate
unless he's movie version of batman oh then he probably who knows then he just blow him up or
whatever yeah exactly leave him for i don't know poison him doesn't matter doesn't matter or you
know circumstances might change yep so wolverine might go non-lethal for a minute yep and then he
realizes aunt may is more dangerous than he anticipated and just chop her head off. Right? Absolutely.
Also, this is... Look, our ruling is final.
That's right.
But what about the characters?
Doctor Doom and the Mandarin.
This is full force.
Yeah, I'm going to say comic book versions.
Yeah.
Because you can't do movie versions because it's just a guy versus a guy who can shoot
lightning and sometimes ride a surfboard exactly yeah that's true yeah all right so we got dr doom
yep see we've got dr doom who's you know strategic genius yep right he has the suit of armor powered
armor yes nuclear powered whatever's all the gear yep full face mask yep you're not hitting him in
the head with a big hammer How is he without the stuff
Hypothetically
He fought a lion once
Like barehanded
Did you see his face
No
I think he was wearing the mask
Him and his mask
I know
Do you have the cape
I can't remember
Okay
It was a leopard skin cape
Okay
I don't know
Okay
And he's got the magic
Right
Yep
He's got magic
Yep
But he's sad
Because his mum's in hell Correct So that's points against him Because he's got the magic, right? He's got magic. Yep. But he's sad because his mum's in hell.
Correct.
So that's points against him because he's sad.
But, so Mandarin's all magic all the time.
What do his rings do?
All right.
Well, there's different versions.
Isn't he some of them technology?
No, they're all technology.
Here's what his rings do.
Ten rings of power.
Here we go.
I can totally do this.
Ten rings of power. Freeze ray. can totally do this Ten rings of power
Freeze ray
Flame blast
Disintegrator beam
Heart
Always get a good parking spot
Sweet abs for summer
Negging
Just for summer?
Yes
Sweet abs for summer and negging go together very well
Don't they just?
Totally nail the drum solo in Phil Collins
in the air tonight.
Nine.
Understand Donnie Darko.
The whole thing.
Can't explain it to people.
Wait, the director's cut
or the regular version?
Whichever you want.
Okay.
And ten.
What this ring does
will make you cry with joy.
Sponsored by Upworthy.com.
So this is before the game or is this halftime entertainment?
I think it's halftime entertainment.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Great.
I think Cade Yang has got that.
This is a slight change.
It's a slightly alternate dimension.
Okay.
Where people are like,
hey, let's have a fun game of football for the family
and then blood sport in the middle and then back to football.
What about Aunt... I don't know who this is from but i'm sorry i apologize aunt may versus alfred that's right yeah which alfred
comic book comic book alfred so that's comic book aunt may then yes because michael cain would kill
that old woman oh yeah what about all of iron man's suits from the movies against every movie and TV version of Batman?
In a football field.
I think that goes to Adam West.
Yeah.
Because he'd have some sort of...
He'd have a rust spray, wouldn't he?
He would have a rust spray.
And it'd work like 60s technology.
So, he'd spray it and everybody would get caught in the rust cloud.
Sure.
And they'd just be, again, just flailing around.
And then, Dark Knight Returns, Batman would show up and just snap everybody's neck.
Yeah, absolutely.
Systematically work his way through.
Tobey Maguire Spider-Man versus...
Any other Spider-Man.
Any other Spider-Man.
You don't want the specific Spider-Man?
Doesn't matter.
Unless it's a mope-off or a dance-off.
Even then.
Yeah, no.
He wouldn't win. Yeah, versus Andrew Garfield's Spider-Man dance-off. Even then. Yeah, no. He wouldn't win.
Yeah, versus Andrew Garfield's Spider-Man.
No question.
Garfield.
Wittier.
Yep.
Better hair.
Yep.
Looks younger.
Yep.
Not as mopey.
This is from AtCoolCatsForever.
Hello.
If both you and Mason were given Superman's powers, who would win da fight?
Is this the same one?
No, this is a different guy.
But this is us again.
But we've got Superman's powers.
I want 1970s powers.
Dammit.
If we both get 1970s powers.
It'd just be us reversing time.
For over and over again.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
Yeah, we just use the time reversing.
I think you have a better knowledge of Superman's powers and I think you'd beat me on that.
Okay, cool.
That's what I think.
Yeah.
There you go.
I'd be reluctant to use the cellophane S
though
I'd go straight for it
straight for the cellophane S
I'd be like
why
no wrong
this is from Francisco
who's the 8 year old
Batman
oh yeah
this is an interesting one
because they're both
they're both poor winners
poor losers
and poor winners
I would say
Boba Fett and
Predator the Predett and Predator.
The Predator.
The Predator.
Yeah.
Again.
We've talked about how Boba Fett is essentially just a Stormtrooper.
He's just a Stormtrooper with a different colorway.
He's what he is.
Yeah.
I did a video on it.
I can't remember which one.
But from this, from this conversation.
Based on his...
Movie track record.
Based on his movie track record.
Because the expanded universe is done, man.
That's right.
Bloody done.
He may be the most elite bounty hunter in the universe,
in the expanded universe,
in the comic books,
in the now cancelled Star Wars 1313.
Yes.
But in the movies,
he's the bloody Abbott or Costello of...
IG-88's the other one.
Yes.
But he's all slapstick.
Yeah, you're right.
He's no good.
Yeah, he is.
Look, he flies up in the jetpack.
Yep.
Predator hits him with one of those net guns.
Yep.
And he goes down and the Predator pulls his spine out.
It's real...
It'd be cool though, wouldn't it?
Yeah, it'd be very cool yeah what about the predator's stronger
yeah it's got that blade thing he's more nimble it's got that spinny blade thing they've probably
got equal gadgets plasma gun yeah plane thrower he can see like every color spectrum or every
radio my favorite part of predator 2 and predator 2 isn't great but my favorite part of that is when
the government guys are like we've got the the Predator, we know he sees in infrared,
so we're going to freeze this whole place and he won't be able to see anything.
Yeah.
And they do that, and the Predator just leans in, he's like, can't see anything, he just
switches over to a different enhanced vision thing, he's like, now I'm fine again.
Yeah.
And see you all.
That's pretty great, yeah.
This is from Ravi.
Hang on, is there a way Boba Fett could win?
He's got a flamethrower.
Oh yeah, sure.
But I don't think that would stop the Predator.
No.
He's also got a rocket pack, but I've never seen him hit anybody with it.
Or fly in a straight line with it.
Or fly anywhere other than directly into a giant monster's mouth.
I guess there isn't a giant monster in...
There's no Sarlacc pit on the football field.
So I guess...
He would just hit the post.
He wouldn't break his own neck.
It's true.
And then maybe that rocket goes off and he dies.
Oh, poor Boba Fett.
I wish you were better.
He's also got that...
Grappling hook?
Yeah, it's like a little rope.
He wraps up Luke Skywalker in it.
Yeah.
But the Predator has a net that can cut through you yeah it's like a razor net or something yeah
yeah but he's got like a hasn't he got that blade that he can throw yeah the
spinny blade he's got no control he's got the giant stick yeah he's got the
pike yeah in predators the movie they've got like scouting Hawks yeah big dogs
big pred dogs yeah Yeah. Pred dogs.
Pred dogs.
But he can't bring his pred dogs.
No, he can't bring the pred dogs.
That's true, yeah.
Yeah.
But, yeah, Predator.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know what?
That's probably going to upset people.
If you'd like to give us a scenario in which Boba Fett wins this, email in.
Can't use Expanded Universe.
Can't use Expanded Universe.
Can't use any of the so-called skills he has in the expanded universe
he's like the bloody mr magoo of bounty hunters that's the that's the metaphor i was thinking of
before he's mr magoo he just bundles through he's he's maxwell smart of bounty hunters he's in he's
the inspector gadget there we go i found it he. He's the Inspector Gadget of Bounty Hunters because he's got a lot of gadgets
that go off at random
and he's muddled his way through
to this point and then it gets to
And nobody's noticed.
Nobody's noticed and they're all like, you're the best.
And he's like, I am the best. And then it gets to
Return of the Jedi and the chips are down
and he actually has to step up and
he falls to pieces.
What an arsehole
oh jesus that's great yeah email it if you disagree i'll read it i won't vivid sounds
writes donald trump versus mexico like i guess the entire mexican population is there enough
room in a bloody you stack them You stack them in, mate.
Stack them high.
Okay, right.
So I guess they just topple onto him?
Yeah, he's dead.
And I'm glad he's dead.
Continue.
Okay.
Seb says, Christopher Reeves.
Reeves.
It's Reeve.
As in plural.
Oh, more.
Reeves Superman, sorry.
Okay, yeah.
As in, that's his Superman.
As in the ownership of.
Oh, I get it. Good. Yeah. Versus Michael Shannon's Superman, sorry. Okay, yeah. As in, that's his Superman. As in, the ownership of... Oh, I get it.
Good!
Yeah.
Versus Michael Shannon's General Zod.
I think Christopher Reeve's Superman is stronger than Man of Steel's Superman.
Yeah, no, that's true.
Because he doesn't...
There's no rules of physics that apply to that Superman.
Yeah, exactly.
Like, he could lift the Earth and move it around if he wanted.
You know what I watched the other day?
I watched the Richard Donner cut of Superman 2.
Yes.
And the ending of that is that he reverses time again.
Twice.
Wow.
To what end?
To undo, like, so Zod and that are back in the Phantom Zone.
As opposed to just putting him in the Phantom Zone.
Well, he kills him.
Yeah.
I don't like this.
I don't like this weird time travel undoing of everything.
It's not a bad cut.
It's not a bad cut. But that ending, why not do that in every movie? Precisely. Yeah. I don't like this. I don't like this weird time travel I'm doing. It's not a bad cut. It's not a bad cut.
That ending, why not do that at every movie?
Precisely.
Yeah.
Also, I've got a question.
Can I bring this up now?
Yeah.
I'm putting together a Superman kill count video.
Yes.
I've spoken to you about this.
And I've got the dilemma of I cannot work out how many people he would be responsible
for killing in Man of Steel.
Oh, this is good for the listeners.
That's what I'm saying.
We've got some geniuses out there.
Now, Zack Snyder has said- Mathematical geniuses out there now zach snyder has said mathematical mathematical zach snyder has probably
got some murderers out there as well so they can they can help out maybe the maybe the mathematical
geniuses and the murderers could team up on this yeah go on the reddit and team up bringing people
together i'm just gone i'm gone reddit and be like i'm i'm a murderer requiring mathematical
geniuses or vice versa that's right we. And we'll find each other, all right?
Now, spoilers, speaking of,
I wanted to know what you thought of the minigun
because I know you're a big minigun aficionado.
I love a good minigun.
You do, but you also hate a bad minigun.
I hate a bad minigun, you're right.
Oh, it's minigun talk.
Here we go.
So they mount it in new John Hammond's helicopter.
They have it for no particular reason.
It's not on the back of anything.
It's not on the back of a truck or anything.
They just have one just in case they need a minigun someone.
I guess.
I guess maybe if you buy all your guns from the one supplier,
if you buy half a million dollars worth of guns,
maybe they're just like, oh, we'll just throw in a minigun for you.
Have a minigun. Have a minigun. Have minigun have fun with it so now they mounted in the helicopter
somehow somehow but then the guy who is operating it is not trained in its use from what i can tell
yeah that neither of the two like military guys were there uh of and the and new john hammond is
not good at flying a helicopter exactly yeah. Not only that, that's not a military helicopter.
So I don't think you can put a military-grade minigun
in a commercial helicopter,
and that's not going to just rattle the whole thing to the ground.
Yeah, but you know what?
Good minigun, I thought.
It blew up some foliage.
Did it have real shells?
I think it did, yeah.
Good.
And if it didn't well done
cgi if not because you hate the minigun in expendables 3 correct because of its weird cgi
yep and it just blew up some foliage predator style which is always good what's the best minigun
in a movie we should do an episode on miniguns the winter soldier one's pretty good but it's
not a classic minigun it's like a little stubby one yeah yeah like they've clearly built it for
the movie it's like a shield you know villain you know hydra one or
whatever yeah terminator 2 probably although he doesn't kill he doesn't kill a lot of people but
he destroyed in fact he kills 0.0 correct people but uh he does like you see it do a lot of damage
yeah like a lot of in a lot of movies with miniguns yeah they don't do a lot okay like
they just sprayed warhully kind of thing like predator yeah exactly which of movies with miniguns, they don't do a lot. Okay. Like they're just sprayed wildly kind of thing.
Like Predator.
Yeah, exactly.
Which is a good minigun.
Good minigun, yeah.
That's the same minigun from Terminator 2.
Is it really?
I don't know if it's literally the same one, but probably.
Okay.
Same model, is what I'm saying.
Okay, right.
Anyway, yeah, it looked real nice.
Yeah, yeah, good.
Good, awesome.
So the best minigun is Terminator 2 minigun.
I think so, yeah.
Guys, email in.
Actually, don't email in.
Tweet me at WikipediaBrown.
Best minigun.
Best minigun, if you could.
Is the gun in Samuel L. Jackson's shield car a minigun or a machine gun?
It's a machine gun.
Interesting.
Yeah.
So don't tweet that one.
Don't tweet that one.
I already know it's already been dismissed.
Yeah.
That is also a gun that he has for no reason
unless he wants to shoot people who are in his car
or his windows have already been blown out.
Correct.
I'm sure he could roll them down if he has to.
I guess so.
But also, you can't shoot to your right with that.
Yeah.
Just saying.
That's why it's not a good minigun, for that reason alone.
And because it's literally not a minigun.
Well, he could because they're on the other side
in America
no
if he's here
doesn't matter
let's move on
he has to turn it like this
oh yeah okay good point
it'll be difficult
it will be difficult yeah
I got an email from
Connor
yep
he's pointed out a couple
he talked about the Predator 1
which we talked about
but he also says Robocop 2
Robocamp
yeah Robocop 2
has a minigun
yep
mounted to his battering ram arm and District 9 an M Robocop 2 has a minigun, yeah. Mounted to his battering ram arm.
And District 9, an MNU soldier briefly fires a minigun at Wickus
when he's in the exosuit.
Don't remember it.
Any of those ring a bell?
Ring a ding ding?
Ring a ding, precisely, yes.
Any others?
The Matrix, there's one mounted on a helicopter.
Oh, that's a good one.
It's pretty good.
The scene is pretty good, but he shoots a whole bunch of agents they all come back up they're all alive again so
ah so yeah yeah but it tears apart that room yeah that's true that's pretty fun that's it's most you
can hope for it's very rare to see somebody shot with a minigun in a movie oh yeah yeah because
they just disintegrate yeah pieces i want to see what about a lot of people said rambo 2008 i was
gonna say that's not a minigun it a minigun it's a Browning M2
no you're bloody
guns made
yeah
that is a good scene
I think someone also
pointed out
Rhodey in Iron Man 2
that's CGI though
okay fair enough
don't like it
so those are the rules
it looks pretty
yeah
it looks pretty solid
but it's not
so that's
Mason's Minigun Minute
Minigun's Minigun Minute
I've actually thought
I'd include a new section
in this week
if you permit it
okay
I've given it a name
oh yes
it's called
hate mail
but there's an 8
in the hate
in the word
because there's 8 of them
there's 8 hate mails
is that
is that the entire
name of the segment
correct
hate mail
but there's an 8
in the hate
great okay
I'm on board now
also just spoiler alert there's an eight in the hate? Yes. Great, okay, I'm on board now.
Also, just spoiler alert,
there's more than eight.
Oh, sure, okay.
Edgar,
who fucking cares what you think about
the movie?
I'm going to the theatre
to have fun!
It's cats.
Oh, it's cats?
Right, yep, good.
Vazza,
this guy's a fucking dick.
Yep.
Christopher,
Mr. Sunday Movies,
you're a shitty little thing i hate you
i thought you'd like this segment that's really good i have fun have you ever thought that maybe
this is just your own opinion and not everybody else's yes yeah what's also interesting is that
in a lot of your videos you do say by the by the way, this is only my own opinion. Like, you make that very clear.
I like all the bat suits,
but the one you pissed me off about
is the 1989 Batman movie suit.
It was their first try at making a bat suit,
so have respect.
And then next comment underneath,
but then again, you're British.
Also, it's the wrong you're.
Right, no, fantastic.
Combine all the greatest things there
this is the one that's that's directed to you because you said you don't like the christopher
reeve sorry reeves um super bad movies but grant little says don't slag off don't slag off reeve
films superman 2 with zod was a classic and in man of steel russell crowe was a classic and in Man of Steel Russell Crowe was a kick ass sorry a kick as scientist
before he got stabbed
that is
that is definitely
relates some of the plot
of Man of Steel
and I enjoy it
very good
this is on my
six things you missed
from Batman v Superman
trailer
I hate Neil deGrasse
atheist asshole
and then another
comment underneath
this is clearly
after they've watched
the video
hang on what was the video
which one was it
Batman v Superman.
Why?
Dawn of Justice.
He's in it.
Neil deGrasse Tyson is in it.
Yeah, he does like a...
He's one of the voiceovers at the start.
Oh, okay, right.
So he hates him because he's an atheist asshole.
Then he says...
He's clearly watched the video because then he says,
actually, I hate the tool that made this dumb video.
Spewing the obvious details with a super annoying narrative.
Dot, dot dot dot k y
kill yourself oh is that what that is i couldn't i didn't know what that was definitely kill
yourself yeah i didn't i'm not i'm not i don't know that for sure but i would assume
that would be my assumption that it's he's telling you to kill yourself this is uh my star wars force
awakens things you missed teaser trailer two boring australians boring dot dot dot australians yes Star Wars Force Awakens Things You Miss Teaser Trailer 2. Uh-huh. Boring.
Australians.
Boring dot, dot, dot.
Australians.
Yes.
You're not even in that.
There's only one of us.
He just means generally.
Oh, okay.
So he wouldn't enjoy Mad Max Fury Road.
Okay.
No, he wouldn't.
He's in that 1%. He's one of those fat cats in the 1%, mate.
So these are on two different videos, but they have a similar kind of theme.
So I'll end with this.
Fantastic.
There's more than eight
normally hate mail
traditionally is supposed
to have eight
though it's never had eight
no let's break the rules
this one time
and every time
yeah
so this is on my
five ways Batman
can beat Superman video
this is from
Nazmuth
Nazmus
dude please include
subtitles from now on
I'm having a hard time
understanding you
which is fair
but I'm not going to do that
no absolutely
why would you
and this is on my interstellar...
Also, I think YouTube does it automatically now.
I think it does, yeah.
Though it doesn't read my voice well, like at all.
Of course not.
You've got a bad sounding voice.
I do.
And this one is on my Interstellar Explained video.
This is from Kaiser Soze.
Please put subtitles in American.
I can't understand what you are saying and be quick about it or I will give you thumbs
down.
Ooh, watch out.
Yes.
And that's another episode of Hate mail but with an eight i can't go back like do i re-upload it what does he want me
to do i don't know it's pretty good he's just on the internet and everybody on the internet's
unhappy yeah you're right be better on the internet better on the internet well so hate
mail with but the hate has an eight in it, will return.
Oh, yes.
I'll bank them.
Oh, good.
And then we'll see how we go.
No fake hate mails, we can tell.
We can tell.
That's right.
Have genuine hate or don't bother.
Exactly.
Go hard or go home, all right?
All right.
You know what it's time for then?
What's it time for?
What are we reading?
Oh, what are we going to read?
Well, as you...
I'm doing the thing.
I'm doing the thing.
What are we reading today? Well, as you... The fan Fan I'm not going to use the word fan Fans of the show Listeners of the show They sound like dickheads Yeah
Fans of the show
Yeah
People who are kind enough
To listen to us
Yeah
People we've tricked
Into listening
Yes
Somehow
Yes
So what I wanted to
My brother reminded me
Of this last week
And I lost my mind
It's something from the 90s
Which I owned
Which I think everybody
Should check out
Okay
It's called It's a video the 90s which I owned, which I think everybody should check out. Okay.
It's called... It's a video board game in the vein of Nightmare.
Do you remember Nightmare?
I remember Nightmare, sure.
But it's called Rap Rat.
And you're saying listeners should track that down somehow.
Yes.
They should both track down the board game and acquire a VCR.
Yes.
And play the Rap Rat video board game.
Basically, the Rap Rat...
What is this?
What is this treasure hunt you've...
Oh, you've bound people to...
We can bring up anything!
Yeah, it's a good point.
It's what we read and what we're going to read.
And it covers everything.
I established that in whatever episode we started this in.
Right, okay.
Right?
Alright, you got me.
You've trapped me in a web of logic.
So basically, it's a big wheel of cheese.
A big... The screen's filled with
cheese, and as the timer goes,
more cheese gets chomped away as you're
trying to collect cheese and race around the board, and
every now and then, Rap Rat will pop out
of... Rap Rat.
Will pop out of the centre of the cheese,
and he's like a little puppet.
A little rubber rat puppet, and
he raps and gives you instructions.
Are they educational raps?
No.
They're fun raps.
Mason, I've got a clip here that you can watch and I'm also going to put it up for the listeners.
Okay, great.
It's ready to go.
Get your headphones on.
Oh, Jesus.
This is the worst thing you've ever done.
And let's say something.
Yeah, all right.
I've brought a lot of junk to this show.
I'm ready.
He looks really annoyed, by the way, everybody.
I'm going to hit the plug again.
God.
All right, here we go.
Here we go.
A minute and a half.
The TV.
The TV is on.
This is the all-new video board game for children who just want to have fun.
The tape is playing, so let's get ready.
I'm not liking it so far.
What are you talking about?
It's filled with 90s sass. I don't like it.
Oh, rules. Okay, great.
Rap Rat may pop up at any point in the game to the sound of a...
When he appears and you hear the...
You must stop playing at once and listen to him.
If he asks you to do something, you must do it, because he's Rap Rat and he's the... You must stop playing at once and listen to him. If he asks you to do something, you must do it,
because he's Rap Rat and he's the boss.
Oh, you've got to obey the rules of Rap Rat,
because he's the boss.
Okay, I get it.
Oh, he's rapping. Okay, good.
I'm a rap-ra-ra-ra-rap rat.
Rap Rat.
I'm history in the making
and all yours for the taking.
I'm the talk of the town,
the cold side of cool. I'm the talk of the town. The cold side of cool.
I'm a legend in a lunchtime.
I'm a one-sir in a lifetime.
Got an alien attitude.
And lots of ratitude.
Oh, I get it.
He's got ratitude.
He's got ratitude.
I get it.
Okay.
Do I have to keep watching this?
No.
Okay.
Thank God.
Okay.
It's off.
All right.
Well, you know what?
You've proved me wrong.
You really can't recommend anything on this dumb segment.
You're against Rat Brass.
No.
The video board game.
Do whatever you like.
Live your life, man.
Not really good.
Good stuff.
Yeah, man.
Well, do you know what it's time for then?
What is it time for?
It's time for a different segment.
Oh, yes.
Where we talk about the letters that we have.
Oh, the letters segment. Yes, or tweets. Yeah. Hashtag Weekly Planet Pod. You know, it just struck for then? What is it time for? It's time for a different segment. Oh, yes. Where we talk about the letters that we have. Oh, the letters segment.
Yes, or tweets.
Yeah.
Hashtag Weekly Planet Pod.
You know what just struck me?
We don't really get letters.
We get emails.
Oh, my God.
You're going to have to go back and re-edit.
So every episode says emails instead of letters.
We've really messed this one up, guys.
Yeah.
Got a theme for this week?
No.
But the classic one was
Letters, oh letters
We love you, some letters
They're only a day away
I know they're here right now, we're gonna do letters
Alright, shout out!
Shout out
Chris Finn from Boston
Remember he was having the worst winter ever
Yes
Now he's coming into spring but apparently there's still snow
Which is bullshit
We're actually going into winter and I hate this time of year
I love it
He said, this is a question for you Mason
Specifically for you
Would you rather fight a duck that's the size of a horse
Or a hundred horses that are the size of ducks
This is very much
I've got an alternate one That I'm going to throw back at him later.
Okay, so duck the size of a horse.
Yeah.
Or a hundred horses.
A hundred horses the size of a duck.
I'm going to say the horse-sized duck.
Really?
Yeah.
This is a true story.
I've been attacked by ducks on three separate occasions.
I'm telling you, that duck would kill you.
That horse-sized duck.
Yeah, but what a fight.
You know what I mean?
It would go down in the ages.
You know? Like, because like, tiny little horses.
Yeah. Like, even if there's a hundred
of them and I was swarmed and killed or
whatever. Yeah. Like, people would be like,
oh, they're probably just little horses.
Like, they're probably like foals or whatever and they're like
runts or something. Like, and they were, you know,
they were gonna, you know, the mother horse got, you know,
Asian-oranged or whatever, and then little runt horses.
And that wouldn't be weird.
But a giant duck.
How did that happen?
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
I think you're wrong.
I think you'd die immediately.
Wow.
And you wouldn't...
Actually, you know what?
He sent in the email to just disagree with whatever you said. I guess, yeah. I'm going to do it. I think you're wrong. I think you'd die immediately. Wow. And you wouldn't... Actually, you know what? He sent in the email to just disagree with whatever you said.
I guess, yeah.
I'm going to do it.
I think you're right.
Because you know why?
I'm on board because I want to see this.
Yeah, yeah.
I want to see you fight this giant duck.
Exactly.
So, yeah.
I'd have a net and a spear and a machine gun.
No rules, man.
That's right.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Or a rocket launcher.
Yes. Imagine if you shot a giant duck with a rocket launcher. That's right. Yeah. Or a rocket launcher. Yes.
Imagine if you shot a giant duck with a rocket launcher.
Just imagine it.
I am and I love it.
Yeah, okay.
Does it have the temperament of a horse or the temperament of a duck?
A duck.
Yeah, it would, wouldn't it?
It's a duck.
It's a duck for all intents and purposes.
It's a duck, but it's got the swagger and self-confidence of a giant duck.
So, you know.
What was this gentleman's name again?
Chris Finn.
Listen, Chris Finn.
I'll give you a question.
Would you rather, mate,
listen, mate,
would you rather fight
a hundred bee-sized bears
or a bear-sized bee?
How do you like that?
Get back to us. Please do, Chris that? Get back to us.
Please do, Chris.
Weekly Planet Pod at Gmail.com.
Is that it?
That's the one.
Because he said his friend always gives him these ridiculous scenarios and he hates them.
So he put one onto you.
But now you've put it back on him.
Yeah.
Well, that's your Twitter avatar.
Which is a joke only you get.
Right.
Until now.
So, basically. Revelations.
This is the ultimatum. Please hit me back on
Twitter for an answer on this. I would like people's opinion
as well. Yeah, so hit me and listen. And why? Don't just tell
us. Tell us why. Yeah.
Basically, the ultimatum is, these are your two
scenarios. You choose between these two things.
Would you rather? Would you rather
be Harrison Ford
as he is now, stuck
in the Star Wars universe? Bearing in mind, Harrison Ford, as he is now, stuck in the Star Wars universe.
Bearing in mind, Harrison Ford hates Star Wars,
and he hates talking about Star Wars,
so he's stuck in this universe.
People would occasionally mistake him for Han Solo,
and he doesn't understand anything because he's an angry old man.
They're like, let's go get the grizzled orcs connected to the flagamagoos or whatever.
That's all he hears.
Right.
And he just wants to drink himself to death in a bar.
But people keep bothering him and asking him, you know, about stories about Han Solo.
But at the same time, he is in an amazing universe where anything can happen.
Yes.
And maybe he, you know.
He embraces it.
Embraces it, yeah.
Or maybe he's killed in a bar fight.
Well, one of those, yeah.
But it's your call because you are...
You're Han Solo.
I mean, you're Harrison Ford, so you can take that wherever you want.
Bearing in mind, this isn't your personality.
It's Harrison Ford.
It's Harrison Ford's personality.
So you are essentially Harrison Ford.
That's option number one.
Option number two, you are Han Solo, right?
You are Han Solo in our universe.
Yep.
You have the ship.
You have the blaster.
You have the blaster.
You don't have Chewie, let's say.
Okay, yep.
But you are a goat.
Yes.
So you are goat Han Solo stuck in our universe.
Right.
So you've got the personality.
You can fly all about the universe.
Yep, the swagger.
You've got the swagger.
You've got it all.
You've got the charm, the ladies. Yep, the swagger. You got the swagger. You got it all. You got the charm, the ladies.
But you're a goat.
You got a little goat vest on.
You can operate your blaster with your little goat hands.
Yeah, but I think we made it so you can use the blaster.
It's not explained how, but you just can.
Yeah.
So, yeah.
What do you choose?
Yeah, it's a really good question, right?
Yeah.
Daxon. You know Daxon, he had the Spider-Man cosplay.
Yeah, absolutely.
He tweeted me a while back.
I don't know, that's not how you say it, but he tweeted me, right?
That's how I'm going to say it.
He said, can I be the official Spider-Man?
He twoted you.
He twited me.
He said, can I be the official Spider-Man of the podcast?
Yes.
Yes.
Done.
Yeah.
So I didn't reply at the time.
It's one of those things where it gets so banked up and I'm like, I'm never going to
find that tweet again.
But yes, you are Daxon. You're the official Spider-Man. Yeah. so I didn't reply at the time it's one of those things where it gets so banked up and I'm like I'm never going to find that tweet again but yes
you are Daxon
you're the official Spider-Man
yeah
even above the actual Spider-Man
yep
above Andrew Garfield
above Tobey Maguire
certainly
he wants to see
a proper adaptation
of the first
Knights of the Republic game
the story is solid
and the characters are complex
it's the perfect material
I played that game
for hours
until I did literally
every side mission
which if you're unfamiliar with the game, it's got more
side missions than you can shake a lightsaber at.
I can shake it a lot.
Stop shaking the lightsaber!
It'd also be cool to see...
If you could add a sound effect in there so it makes it sound like you're shaking a lightsaber.
Okay, good. Okay, cool.
It'd also be cool to see a Rogue Squadron movie
with a team of X-Wing fighters doing missions
and maybe led by a young Luke. Also, a movie where Boba fett slaughters gungans sure okay yeah cool they do this is a
letter from jack c hey guys love the show i miss mason singing the song every week especially the
smallville one therefore i challenge mason to sing a bond theme every week until secchi tree
that's the actual specter oh yeah yeah, it is Secchitree.
Absolutely it's Secchitree.
Thanks, Jack. Wow.
What do you think? Alright, give me a Bond theme. I'll do it.
Madonna died of it. I can't remember that
one, guys. Give me another one. Do the
Paul McCartney one.
Oh. No, no, no.
No, no, no. Yeah, that one. Great
song. Um, yeah.
Hang on, how does that go again? How does it start? I don't know, but I know. Yeah, that one. Great song. Um, yeah. Live and let die. Hang on, how does that go again?
How does it start?
I don't know, but I know.
When we were young
And your heart was an open book
Girls and Roses did it as well.
Not as good.
You used to say
Live and let live
You know you did
You know you did
You know you did
That's how it goes.
And in this ever-changing world
In which we're living
See?
People are confused. Makes you give in and cry This ever-changing world in which we're living. See?
People are confused.
Makes you give in and cry.
Bow-na-now.
Say live and let die.
Bow.
Okay, yeah.
Great.
New segment.
I'm forced to sing a James Bond song. I think we should do that one every week.
Right, okay.
Alright.
It's from Ali, who's written in before with all sorts of scoops.
Oh, yeah.
Old Scoopy Malie.
Old Scoops Malie.
Did you guys see, and what do you think of the Crossbones costume?
Did you see that?
I saw it very briefly.
It looks pretty good.
I liked it a lot.
Solid, yeah.
And it makes sense he's wearing a mask.
It does make sense.
Because Crossbones does.
And also he's got his face burned off.
Yeah.
Yeah, it looks pretty solid.
I'm all for it. Are you against it?
And it looks kind of, you know, it looks
shield-y as well. Do you hear that banging? Yeah.
What the hell is that?
Stop it, whoever you are!
They just keep going. They just keep going.
It's getting tense.
Can I probably go check that out?
Yeah maybe Alright I'll be back
Talk to the listeners
I won't
I'm gonna be in total silence
I'm gonna take a weapon
Yeah good thing
Do you mind if I take one of your shoes?
Yeah no take one of my shoes sure
Take the vacuum
They stopped
Oh wait now they're continuing
You know what it is?
What is it?
There's some fucking hipster.
He's dressed.
Oh, here we go.
He's dressed in like little shorts and flannel
and he's got a beard and Ray-Bans and a backwards hat.
And he's got a bloody lacrosse stick
and he's throwing a ball up against the side of where we live.
Not us.
You told him to stop?
What are you going to do?
Let's let it go, man.
All right.
Insanity.
Man.
Anyway, press on.
Wait, does he live around here?
I've never seen him before.
Anyway, if you know who that guy is. Is that coming through on've never seen him before. Anyway.
If you know who that guy is.
Is that coming through on the headphones?
Probably is.
Yeah.
Anyway, people wanted to know also what happened with La Crosse Hipster last week.
Oh, that's right.
Do you have a lot of tweets about that? Because last week we were interrupted by a sort of Edgar Allan Poe-esque sinister knock
on the wall, like a continuous knock.
Who said, who said to that tweet that said, that's some telltale hardship.
It is very telltale.
That's a very clever tweet.
And you went outside and you discovered it was a hipster.
What was he doing?
Playing, throwing a lacrosse, using a lacrosse stick and just throwing a ball up against
the side of my building.
Right.
Yeah.
And I didn't say anything.
Yeah.
And after the show, you were like, you should probably say something.
And I was like, fuck it.
No, I won't.
But then it got to the point where I was like you know what i'm gonna have to say
something because otherwise you'd be back forever exactly bring all his friends bring all his bloody
lacrosse friends yeah and look then it'll be like you know what we've always wanted to find a place
not to play lacrosse but to just whack lacrosse balls on a wall i found the place i found it
so i went out that is one guy because if he
comes back with a team i'm not what am i gonna do get beat up nip it in the bud exactly so i said
hey man sorry it's reverberating through the building and he was very cool about it's like
oh sorry man i thought it was double rick or whatever and i'm like oh good yeah he was very
polite that's also what a dickhead yeah well actually um you did that and you came back
inside and when i left i killed him. And I stuffed him in your bin.
There was bloody quinoa and limited edition vinyl records everywhere.
I killed him.
So there you go.
You worked out for the best.
Lastly, could you guys give me a shout out in your American accent?
Because no one has asked that yet.
That's rough.
New York style.
You got to do it New York style.
Forget about it.
Get me one of them yellow cabs.
There's a gorilla club climbing the Empire State Building.
That was really good.
I'm very proud of you.
Could you actually do an American accent?
No.
Me neither.
You don't want to do it?
No.
You know what?
I can do it if I hear it and then I can sort of replicate it, but I can't just do it off
the cuff.
I guess the New York one will have to do.
It's a very solid New York accent.
It sure is.
You should be happy about it.
The Yankees are my favourite baseball team.
Squad, they say squad.
Squad team, yeah.
Shout out.
Shout out.
Forget about it.
How's that?
Great, smooth.
Smooth transition, excellent.
Original setting.
Original setting, old stomping grounds,
specifically your mum and dad's house.
Correct.
For some reason. Well, there's a book grounds, specifically your mum and dad's house. Correct. For some reason.
Well, there's a book club going on at my house.
I see.
And because we know books are for nerds.
We're not going to sit around or stand for that.
No, quite frankly.
We're going to do neither of those things.
Now, last week, in sort of the wind-up of last week's show,
we were talking about catchphrases.
Yes.
And I've got two sweet catchphrases right
wait
which catchphrases are your catchphrases
well I got grab dad jam
I invented that
did you
yeah if you go back to the
guardians of the galaxy episode
I said grab dad jam
oh fair enough
alright well it's on my
it's on my t-shirt
anyway the point is
you don't have a catchphrase
so
I thought I would maybe try
test run some catchphrases
alright cool
for you this week
as I think of them.
Just as we go?
Yeah, just as we go.
Well, basically because I've only thought of one now.
Okay, good.
I thought of one right now.
Okay, here's your catchphrase.
Think about it.
Here's your little avatar on a t-shirt.
Yep.
And then the catchphrase is like, hey, who ate all my paschetti?
Am I holding an empty bowl of spaghetti?
Paschetti. Paschetti. Like you say.chetti like you say yeah like i say yeah okay
cool how about that can i have a bib yeah yeah like a baby's beard yeah and you're sad looking
okay does that work or do you want to look up look we'll say that's obviously the probably
going to be the best probably going to be the best one we'll see how we go your first instinct
is always the best absolutely it is Who ate all the biscotti?
Brilliant.
It's the end of the show, so I'm going to say my catchphrase.
Okay.
Grab that gem, everyone.
And you can say whichever catchphrase you choose, but it can't be that one.
Where's the gorilla?
Was that one?
No.
That was one?
No.
Because the gorilla was in the flesh.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
Yep.
What was another one?
I think we should go with the first one.
Hey.
Where's my biscotti? Who ate my biscotti? i don't like that one that's the point that is very much the point
bye everybody where's my spaghetti fuck you all right guys have your spaghettis all right thanks
everyone grab that gem grab that new t-shirts uh the never go back t-shirts no there is that
but there's i can quickly show you is it um who who ate my paschetti t-shirts yeah look at weekly
planet somebody buy who who ate my paschetti t-shirt this is james's catchphrase grab that
gem grab that am i allowed to say it say your say i don't like my catchphrase it's not the people
have spoken there's a t-shirt now you have to to say it. Where's my biscetti? I do.
I hate it.
I don't like it.
It really upsets me.
That's the show for this week.
I'll say my catchphrase.
Grab that jam, everyone.
And now you say whatever catchphrase comes to mind.
Who ate all my biscetti?
Yeah.
Bye, everyone.
I thought you forgot.
No. Never. Eat your spaghettis. Bye everyone I thought you forgot Nah Never
Eat your spaghettis
My vision just blurred
Thanks everyone
Bye
Oh someone recommended the catchphrase
For me
Snap dat neck
But am I stuck with the spaghetti one?
You are
So I'm gonna say
Grab dat gem you guys
You know you can do it
Where's my basquetti?
Yay
Alright guys Have spaghetti Grab dat gem everybody That gem, you guys. You know you can do it. Where's my paschetti? Yay!
All right, guys.
Have spaghetti.
Grab that gem, everybody.
Where's my spaghetti?
Yeah!
I've decided.
Yes.
I'm not doing my bloody catchphrase anymore.
I'm putting my foot down.
All right.
That's your catchphrase now.
I'm putting my foot down.
Oh, yeah.
I'm a big sook.
Well, I'm going to close out with my classic catchphrase, grab that gem. And then you can close with your classic catchphrase.
I'm not going to say, where's my paschetti?
Could you say that?
So grab that gem, you guys.
Can I just go, can I have total silence?
No, you have to say.
I'm not going to say my classic catchphrase, grab my bloody spaghettis, mate.
Great, we did it.
All right.
We did it.
Now, as always, grab that gem, guys.
Yes.
And James, what do you say?
I don't say anything.
Your famous catchphrase,
I'm not going to say,
who ate all my paschetti?
I'm saying nothing.
Okay.
We're going to end the show.
Great.
I'm going to lie down.
Okay, good.
You've earned it.
I have.
Because you're hungry.
You need to lie down because you're hungry.
I'm so hungry.
Because someone ate your paschetti.
That's right.
Who ate your paschetti?
No, we'll never know.
We'll never know.
All right.
Goodbye, everybody.
Grab a data jam, everyone.
That's right.
No catchphrase.
This chair creaks.
There we go.
New catchphrase.
Bye, everybody.
Bye.
Grab data jam, everybody.
No catchphrase.
Nice.
Fine, I'll say it.
Who ate all my biscuits
yay
that's the last time
alright
thanks everybody
grab that jam everybody
please do
say a catchphrase
just pick one
say anything
that's my old laptop
I gotta get rid of that
this one
great I can't wait
for the t-shirt design
for that one
it's got a blu-ray player
huh
it was one of the first
I have three laptops.
Jesus.
It's too many.
One's for torrenting.
One's this one that does nothing.
And one's my real one.
That all has to be on the T-shirt, by the way.
Just so we're clear.
I like how I looked around the roof for a catchphrase
and then I just realized that I had to throw out a computer.
Yeah, great.
Good.
Next week, something else.
Yeah.
All right. Grabbed our jam, everybody. Grabbed our jam. What's your catchphrase this week? day planner yeah great good next week something else yeah alright grab that gem everybody
grab that gem
what's your
what's your catchphrase this week
something about a chair
that's just nonsense
no that's just nonsense syllables
fine
I don't have one
I don't want one
can I just say
grab that gem
none of this matters
hashtag
and that's true
that's true
nah see
you didn't say say with a resignation that
we'll try it we'll try a different one next week no this matters no no go with your standard one
where's this begin yay thanks everybody thanks spike grab that gem everybody hey i'm saying my
catchphrase that's my catchphrase that i do you've already got a catchphrase so this is my
when i guessed on other shows i don't think so. When I guest on other shows
that's what I say. You need another catchphrase.
This is not. You're not guesting. You're a
member of this show. So this is my catchphrase.
How dare you. You need another catchphrase.
Disagree. Wow.
Brutal. Bye guys.
Bye. Alright grab that gem you
guys. Daniel Craig looks like a potato?
Yeah.
All right.
That's going to come back and bite us in the ass.
Definitely.
And by that, you mean Daniel Craig's going to beat me to death?
Yeah.
He's got Hollywood muscles.
I reckon I could take him.
Yeah, true.
He'd kill me.
All right.
That's a great catchphrase, that whole thing. Oh, the dog woke up.
Hello.
You're all right.
You're a good dog.
I like your spirit.
Okay, see you guys.
We like your spirit, guys.
See you next time.
I meant the dog. We don't like your spirit, guys. Just dog like your spirit guys see you next time i meant the dog we don't
like your spirit guys just dog spirit all right all right thanks everybody grab it dad jam you
guys bye you don't have to i'm saying it you don't have to grab it you can do what you want you're
free run into the woods i didn't even think about that oh this has put me in a real ethical dilemma
i've been telling people what to do for like a year.
Take your shirt off right into the woods.
If you want to.
That's it. We did it.
We did it. Grabbed our gem, everybody. See you next week. Please have...
We finally found it.
We found your catchphrase.
Please have...
Alright, awesome.
Thanks, everybody.
Goodbye.
Grab that jam, everybody.
Goodbye.
That was very formal.
Bye!
Hey, check this out.
Is that a Viewmaster?
No, it's a retro arcade game I got as a gift.
It's unpleasant already.
Wait for it.
Start, please.
This is some great bonus content.
This game is amazing.
I can't see it,
but I'm assuming that it's
like your character's
just in an office
and you're walking back and forth
from a photocopier.
It could be.
The graphics are very abstract.
Yeah. I want to beat the level. The graphics are very abstract. Yeah.
I want to beat the level
so I get the victory music.
Yeah.
Give me the victory music!
Great content
for the podcast.
Should I leave this in?
Yeah, definitely leave it in.
There's only...
How long does it take to win?
For God's sake.
There's one button.
Yes.
And there's a back and...
There's a right and left trigger. It's called Astro
Wars by the way.
I got this a few years ago and I only
just found it again. It's not good.
Did you find it in the garbage?
The bad guys keep coming.
Oh yes, I'm nearly there. I've got one more.
You idiot.
Oh, new level.
No, you're done. I, new level. No.
You're done.
I want to leave.
Unlock the door and let me out.
Okay, bye everyone.
Bye.
It says Astro Wars electronic.
Nobody cares about your Astro Wars.
Electronic game.
All right, give me a go.
Outro theme. Friends game. All right, give me a go. Outro theme.
Friends leaving the room together.
What a show, what a memory.
Man, so many classic memories that we shared just then.
Do you agree, Mason?
I'm just so relaxed.
Yes.
From those memories and being on holiday.
You know what the good news is as well?
We should shout out bloody Raw Collins for putting all that together.
Absolutely, yeah.
What a bloody legend.
And everybody on Reddit, the Weekly Planet Reddit,
who decided that they were our favourite moments of,
I was going to say this year, but it's been like the last two years.
Two years?
Yeah.
I don't know.
It's been pretty good.
Sorry for the...
Shout out to everybody who's listened.
Shout out to that there's enough people that have favourite moments.
Yes, that's right.
You know what I mean?
Because they could very well have been, you know,
hey, everybody, what's your favourite moment?
And one guy's like, I like this bit.
And that's it.
That doesn't make a very good combination, does it?
No, it doesn't, no.
That's it.
Also, we apologise for the varying audio quality.
That's obviously...
It's on our end.
Sure.
It's an evolution.
It is, isn't it?
Yeah.
It absolutely is.
But look,
someone else,
Derpston,
sorry,
Derpston P. Derp
has also put up on Reddit.
Not his real name.
Well, we don't know that.
Or she.
Or she.
A compilation as well.
I haven't listened
all the way through,
but I'm sure there's also
some classic
Weekly Planet moments.
Maybe it's the same thing.
Maybe we said something stupid. Guaranteed maybe it's the same thing maybe we said something stupid
guaranteed
guaranteed
maybe we said something
that's factually incorrect
and at the time
when you listened to it originally
you got mad at it
you can get doubly mad
that it's in this one now as well
double it up
I'll link that description
if you go to the Reddit
it's there as well
yeah that's the show
for this week isn't it
of sorts
of sorts
we'll be back though,
won't we?
We'll be back next week
because it's a new year.
Yeah.
We talk new year stuff.
We can talk about
what we're excited about
in the new year.
All the movies
that we're excited for.
Or we can talk about
all the comic book movie stuff,
movie news stuff
that happened this week.
Yes.
That we missed.
That people have already
talked about ad nauseum,
I'm sure, on the internet.
That's right.
We can talk about them again,
you know?
We can talk about some now. Did you see Doctor Strange? Nah. Looked pretty good. Oh yeah, you've been on this nauseum, I'm sure, on the internet. That's right. We can talk about them again, you know. We can talk about some now.
Did you see Doctor Strange?
No.
Looked pretty good.
Oh, yeah, you've been on this sweet holiday, I forgot.
Yeah, yeah.
Crabs snapping, waves crashing.
Yeah.
All those things.
Unless Doctor Strange is a bloody palm tree, I wouldn't have seen it because I'm on holiday.
That's a good point.
More like the Waikiki planet.
Very good. Thank you. Next week. Yep. Thank you, everybody, for listening to us. Seriously. holiday it's a good point more like the waikiki planet very good thank you next week yep thank
you everybody for listening though seriously we appreciate it absolutely yeah grab that gem you
guys this is this is a once-off who ate all my biscotti yeah special occasion holiday magic Special occasion. Holiday magic.
FX's The Veil explores the surprising and fraught relationship between two women who play a deadly game of truth and lies
on the road from Istanbul to Paris and London.
One woman has a secret.
The other, a mission to reveal it before thousands of lives are lost.
FX's The Veil, starring Elizabeth Moss, is now streaming on Disney+.