The Weekly Planet - Minisode - The Hobbit 3 (Is Terrible)

Episode Date: January 5, 2015

Our first episode in 2015 is %100 Middle Earth! From how The Hobbit trilogy came to be to that last film that just came out. And that’s it. What fun. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more ...information.

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Starting point is 00:01:06 Welcome back everybody to another mini-sode of The Weekly Planet, official podcast of comicbookmovie.com. My name is James, editor of that website with me as always, my co-host Nick Mason. Woo! I'm full of sugar and caffeine and popcorn. Let's do this. And almonds. I had some almonds. Yeah, for energy. Yes, absolutely. Sometimes we do that, don't we, before the show.
Starting point is 00:01:21 Don't, don't. That's a little peek behind the camera. Well look, I say mini-sode because we were either not going to do an episode this week or we're just going to talk exclusively about The Hobbit because people want to know our thoughts on that for some reason. Do they? I feel we're too late. Oh, we are. We're well too late. But look, there wasn't that much news this week, probably.
Starting point is 00:01:37 I haven't really been looking at it. I've been away and stuff. What have you been doing? I never look. Business as usual, then. Yep, correct. Great. So what we're going to do, I think.
Starting point is 00:01:47 Yes. We could do a brief run through of how the Hobbit films got made. Oh, yes. Briefly. Talk about the new film and the trilogy in general. And then we'll just cap it off, mate. Great. Just a short one.
Starting point is 00:01:58 Just a minisode. Okay. Yeah, yeah. You cool with that? Yeah, totally. But if you want to talk about something else, that's also cool. Look, I'd like to talk about the government. No, I don't want to talk about the government.
Starting point is 00:02:10 All right. So do you want me to just talk about how this started, this Hobbit trilogies? Yeah, let me. Well, I would like to. Is there some sort of, is there controversy? There's controversy. There's like rights here and there. There's like directors dropping in and out.
Starting point is 00:02:24 There's a knife fight. Oh, yes. Del Toro and Peter Jackson. That's right directors dropping in and out. There's a knife fight. Oh, yes. Del Toro and Peter Jackson. That's right. In a New Zealand car park. Oh, great. Wow. Whatever the New Zealand Sainsbury is called.
Starting point is 00:02:33 I don't know. But yeah, so this started in like 95. That was when Fran Walsh, who was one of the writers and producers of the Lord of the Rings movies, one of Peter Jackson's collaboration partner. Oh, yes. She wanted to Rings movies, by Peter Jackson's collaboration partner. Oh, yes. She wanted to make these movies with Peter Jackson. And they were going to originally make The Hobbit. Like, that was the idea.
Starting point is 00:02:51 Three movies. First one based off The Hobbit. Second one, Lord of the Rings. Third one, Undisclosed. I don't know. The Simmering Lemurian? Maybe it's like a remake of Animal House or something like that. It's unrelated.
Starting point is 00:03:04 They were like, look, we're just... Ultimate ultimate dream is to make a new European vacation film. Yes. This is how I get there. Once I got the juice from these Hobbit films. Straight into it. So, yeah, but the thing was, though, the rights of the Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit were with separate people. I thought of another one.
Starting point is 00:03:25 They were with separate people. Sep's a caviar. Exactly. I thought of another one. They were with separate people. And the rights holders of the Hobbit thought, well, they're not going to make Lord of the Rings. They'll make the Hobbit because that's the one that you make. So I'll hold out. Yeah. Is that really? I'm assuming so, yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:36 And for whatever reason. There was a bunch of legal wrangling and eventually they just went, we're just going to make Lord of the Rings. Huh, okay. Fuck yeah. Yeah, absolutely. We're doing this. So, and because they're obviously, we're just going to make Lord of the Rings. Huh, okay. Fuck yeah. Yeah, absolutely. We're doing this.
Starting point is 00:03:46 So, and because they're obviously, they're very different stories. The Hobbit, if you did that as a movie on its own, it's kind of a light kind of fairy tale kind of, it's a kid's book. Way more than the Lord of the Rings books are. Yeah, true. Which both of us have read. In bits. I've read the Wikipedia summary. Some of it.
Starting point is 00:04:03 I tried to read Lord of the Rings. So, yes, instead they went ahead to read lord of the rings so yes instead they went ahead with the uh the lord of the rings trilogy and then like in the mid-2000s peter jackson there was a a lawsuit where peter jackson up went up against new line who were distributing the film uh-huh financing it i don't know whatever for rights to a lord of the to a to a fellowship of the ring video game or something oh Oh, right. Okay. And so that... Because this is Hollywood accounting. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:04:27 Was it a case of like, you've made all these toys and lunchboxes and video games. Yeah. And I'm entitled to that as the director of the film because I created that visual. Yeah, because of the interest. Right, right. Well, what I believe happened was he had a direct hand. There was a Two Towers game and there was a return to king game and had all the cast they were really good for the time i don't know if they hold up right but
Starting point is 00:04:49 like all the original cast let's assume yes yes and they were they were pretty great but i think there was a lord of the rings game that was not based on the movies right and i'm guessing this is just lord of the rings extreme bowling yes Lord of the Rings extreme volleyball yes sexy sexy as so maybe that was what it was about
Starting point is 00:05:09 maybe there were some other games I'm not sure exactly so one of the co-founders of New Lion whose name is Robert Shea
Starting point is 00:05:16 was basically said you're a greedy son of a bitch Peter Jackson we will never work with you again we're done
Starting point is 00:05:24 this is after all three Lord we're done this is after all three Lord of the Rings this is after it was yep after that so this was like mid 2000 so like 2006
Starting point is 00:05:31 or 2007 but oh there's a twist in the tale New Line then had like a string of flops I remember that like it might have been
Starting point is 00:05:39 like maybe Eragon was one remember that dragons and sorcery and whatever see there they were like we don't need Peter Jackson. What we'll do is we'll create a film with one of the characters from Lord of the Rings name, but slightly tweaked.
Starting point is 00:05:51 Yes. Like Aragorn's close enough. Whatever. People see this. We're geniuses, because we're in the film industry. Have you ever seen those? No. Or that?
Starting point is 00:05:59 No. It's the same with the Narnia films. The Narnia films I definitely got ground because of The Hobbit. Right. I'd imagine. And I've only seen one of those and I didn't really care for it, quite frankly. So the Eragon series, that was a series? That's a book series.
Starting point is 00:06:12 Book series. Yeah. But there was only one film? I believe so. Okay, right. Look, there may have been two, but if there was, I don't know. You remember the... There's no way to check.
Starting point is 00:06:20 No. You remember the... Did you see the Chronicles of Narnia, the first one? No. It's very confusing. Not like... I understand it. And I think... Did you see the Chronicles of Narnia, the first one? No. It's very confusing. Not, like, I understand it. There's a lion, there's a witch, a wardrobe. I'm pretty sure New Line actually made those, because a lot of it was also filmed in New Zealand. They don't have the exclusive rights to film in New Zealand. New Line.
Starting point is 00:06:40 I don't know. Well, Avatar. Avatar filmed there as well. Not the last Airbender right the the other one but uh the good one i guess yeah i've not heard any good things about yeah the other one but um you remember though that that movie there was like santa claus turns up and gives them weapons at one point i'm sure this is in the book huh and at the end it's like white tigers fighting bears fighting unicorns fighting horse men and i'm like who's who i don't know like i don't know who's who am i got was the snow leopard a good leopard or about i don't know uh-huh but anyway not the point uh so basically after a
Starting point is 00:07:18 spring that would have been confusing yes now that i mention it maybe they could have had little collars with little that's like red red stone. Or one of them's running left, one of them's running right. Better. Yeah. But because after those movies, or a lot of these movies flopped, they... I love being a bad unicorn. All the unicorns could have yelled. In unison.
Starting point is 00:07:37 Yeah. Yeah, so basically they wanted Peter Jackson back. They're like, nah, man, we're joking. Jokes. Sure. You know. So he came back on purely as a producer for The Hobbit, right? But he didn't want to direct them because he didn't want to compete with his previous
Starting point is 00:07:51 films, which makes sense. Because I guess, especially when you look at something like Star Wars, like you look at how that went. Oh, yes. How did that go? It made billions of dollars, mate. Yeah, you're right. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:03 That's a podcast for another day. A Minnesota for another day. And the idea was, we'll do two films, 2011, 2012. And there's a whole bunch of legal wrangling about those being pushed back and whatever, whatever. And Del Toro was hired. Do you remember that? Yeah. At one point as director.
Starting point is 00:08:22 So he was very much on board. And his films were going to be kind of vastly different than what we actually ended up getting with the Hobbit trilogy. First of all, there was obviously two, as originally envisioned. There would have been more animatronics and stuff because the Hobbit films are very kind of CGI heavy, especially with creature stuff. Boy, was it.
Starting point is 00:08:42 And so the first movie would be the tale of the Hobbit, pretty much, and probably killing the dragon. And the second one would then evolve into Lord of the Rings. So it would have been a very, it would have been a Gimero del Toro unique visual style for the first one, and the second one would slowly meld into Peter Jackson's world. Right, right, right. Which sounds pretty good.
Starting point is 00:09:04 Well, that's what they attempted with the Star Wars prequels yes and as we mentioned billions of dollars yes so smart move del toro yeah so like and i like the idea of that because i think i know we'll talk about that a bit and why there's there are two cgi heavy but ian holm who was the original bilbo baggins was going to come back oh yep not that del toro said our problem with swapping him out for martin freeman because you saw ian holm in the the new one right he looks he looks quite old oh yes yeah and it doesn't really line up like gandalf you can kind of he looks pretty much the same the kellons look the same for a really long time but yeah so but he left in 2010 because it just kept getting pushed back and whatever whatever they threw up some other directors that you may be familiar with who might, you know,
Starting point is 00:09:49 they might get on board. Neil Blomkamp, who did District 9, who's, he was going to do the Halo movie and he's worked with Peter Jackson before or whatever. Brett Ratner. Oh, yes. Mistake. The rat, sure. David Yates, who did some Harry Potters.
Starting point is 00:10:03 Oh, okay, sure. And David Dobkin, who I wasn, who I had to look him up. If anything, David Dobkin should have done some Harry Potter films. His name's David Dobkin. Yes. Fred Claus. Sure, okay. The Change-Up.
Starting point is 00:10:15 I think that's the Jason Bateman, Ryan Reynolds one where they change it up. I think. Where they pee into a fountain and then mind swap. I haven't seen it. Oh, yeah, okay. Either that or some sort of sperm swap. Yes. Might've been that one.
Starting point is 00:10:28 That was the delivery man with Vince Vaughn. Oh. And that was the one where he had lots of different kids. I don't know. It doesn't matter. Maybe you're thinking of the movie sperm swap. I probably think of sperm swap. But he also did the judge,
Starting point is 00:10:39 you know, that Robert Downey Jr. movie that came out this year that nobody saw. Yep. That would apparently was just okay. But look, fans didn't like any of that idea. And I remember at the time thinking as well,
Starting point is 00:10:51 I don't know if I want Del Toro to do it, I'd rather Peter Jackson come back. Oh, yes. But in hindsight, sometimes fans don't always know what they're talking about, Mason. I'd say in almost all cases. Yes, definitely. So Peter Jackson agreed to come back and split it into two films and the films
Starting point is 00:11:06 were going to be split. Now you've only seen the third Hobbit film is that right? There's a bit at the end of the film Because god damn it I wanted to see if it
Starting point is 00:11:14 held up on its own as a film. That's why. Also too lazy to go back. Yes. I would have wished those two movies upon you. But no, they're fine.
Starting point is 00:11:23 But the split was going to be there's a bit bit at the end, and this happens at the end of the first Hobbit movie, where the eagles rescue them. Oh, yes. As they always do in these movies. I've seen a lot of eagle rescue in those films, in Lord of the Rings. And then that second movie would have been The Desolation of Smaug. Oh, yeah. And what you watched.
Starting point is 00:11:40 Right. Just hours ago, is that right? You've just come back from it. Yeah, just come back from it, yeah. Yeah. You look kind of pale. Yeah, well. But then in 2012 it was confirmed
Starting point is 00:11:49 they were going to turn it into a trilogy and the third movie would make extensive use of the appendices that Tolkien wrote, I think in Return of the King, or The Lord of the Rings, sorry, to expand the story of Middle-earth. Great. So that's what we got in the end and
Starting point is 00:12:06 i guess in some ways your your tolkien fan would want that yeah sure moviegoers maybe don't want that no so that that's basically how we got here oh yes that's the story of me and you oh yeah wonderful yeah so on the back of that uh of that, what would you rather have seen? A Del Toro or a Peter Jackson. Or even two or three or whatever. Or one. Or none. Or some.
Starting point is 00:12:34 Oh yes. Or a Minnesota. Oh yeah. Just a brief summary, it's Del Toro and Peter Jackson just being like, how about we put this in? Look, there'll be some spiders and a dragon and the a sword and a ring. The eagles will come in. Ring turns invisible. Remember from the last one we did. Yeah, we'll do that.
Starting point is 00:12:48 I mean, yeah, that's what we're doing. Yeah. Ah, look. Well, see, I don't feel that, because I only saw the last one. Yeah. I didn't really feel that it was crushingly boring and long. Okay, yeah. But I just saw the one.
Starting point is 00:13:02 And I'm like, well, I get, I can, I've read The Hobbit. I know that he met with, that he, Gollum and got the ring and long okay yeah but i just saw the one and i'm like well i get i can i've read the hobbit i know that he met with bloody golem and got the ring and whatever and all that sort of stuff so there's your there's your mini so and look i didn't hate it it didn't feel too long i think i would i think maybe two movies would have been my limit. Yeah. In particular. Well, I just, for me, and I, I didn't, I didn't hate it, but I really felt burnt out.
Starting point is 00:13:29 I've seen these movies over three years. Like I haven't gone back, but like 10 minutes in, I'm just like, Jesus Christ. Like, just, I see for me,
Starting point is 00:13:37 it's been since return of the King came out. I haven't seen it. Like 2003. Yeah. Something like that. Yeah. So when you're a baby, when I was a baby,
Starting point is 00:13:44 exactly. So yeah. Okay. Fair fair enough like a popcorn milk in cinema okay fair enough so i was like yeah this is kind of kind of a welcome return so like a breezy kind of yeah not breezy sorry that's the wrong word yeah just the welcome return yeah for all your favorites well cast okay cast wise bilbo what did you think of martin freeman good i'm glad he's Sorry, that's the wrong word. Just a welcome return. Yeah. For all your favourites. Well, cast. Okay, cast-wise. Bilbo, what did you think of Martin Freeman? Good. I'm glad he's in things.
Starting point is 00:14:09 He's good, isn't he? Yeah. He's really good. He's good in things generally. Yeah, he really is. He's often the best part of the things that he's in. The Office, is he? He's a very good part of The Office.
Starting point is 00:14:19 Sherlock Holmes. I'm going to say probably the best part of that. More than Benedict Cumberbatch? Okay. Yeah. What about... More than the version of Moriarty that everybody hates. Definitely. Who's going to be the new Bond?
Starting point is 00:14:30 Oh, that guy. I hope he does the voice. Sherlock! I'm crazy. I don't mind that. You know what? I'm good with it. I don't mind that portrayal of Moriarty.
Starting point is 00:14:42 Okay. I know it's completely against the style in the books, but that's fine. I'm okay with it. Sure. Well, you know, whatever. Modern interpretation. Also, I think that guy
Starting point is 00:14:49 is definitely going to be a good guy. He's going to be a good guy that switches over to the bad guys and then you... Ah, James Bond film. Okay, yep, yep, yep.
Starting point is 00:14:56 Sure. Because if you looked at the press conference, he's seated with the bad guys. Oh, they ask kind of this. But they're like, he's an MI6 agent. But then they put him
Starting point is 00:15:04 with the bad guys. Yeah. Tip. Tip. Anyway, we're talking about The Hob... He's an MI6 agent. But then they put him in the bad guy. Yeah. Tip. Tip. Anyway, we're talking about The Hobbit or whatever. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, Bill Boy... Luke Evans.
Starting point is 00:15:10 Luke Evans. Yeah, solid, I think. Luke Evans, it's the best film I've seen him in this year. What other films have you seen him in? None. He's in one of the... He was in Dracula last year. He was.
Starting point is 00:15:21 He was in... Yeah, good point. He was in Fast and the Furious 6 as a villain yeah and Statham's in the new one and Statham's his brother spoiler alert
Starting point is 00:15:30 he's like I want revenge because you Luke Evan's my brother or whatever so there's revenge oh yeah sure so that's pretty good
Starting point is 00:15:39 yeah look if anything this movie does Luke Evans play the same character in everything yes sort of stoic guy stoic guy
Starting point is 00:15:44 no the stoic villain in Fast and Furious. Was he stoic? He was pretty stoic, yeah. Okay, cool. That's pretty good. But if anything, this movie could have used more Luke Evans. Less dwarves, more Luke Evans, more Martin Freeman. Less what?
Starting point is 00:15:57 Starting with D? Dwarves. What did I say? You said dwarves. I don't know, but a lot of people say dwarves. But I don't care for it. There's no little apostrophe, is there? Dwarves. Dwarve. Like D-ves. And I know a lot of people say dwarves, but I don't care for it. There's no little apostrophe, is there? Dwarves.
Starting point is 00:16:08 Dwarve. Like D-or. Oh, like hors d'oeuvres. Yes. Right, okay. I would have done with more hors d'oeuvres. Yeah, definitely. I nearly went with the luxury package.
Starting point is 00:16:17 It was like 40 bucks. What do you get with that? You get a little duck. This is us padding out the Minnesota. You get free popcorn and drink. You get little duck pancakes. No, this is true. Where did you go?
Starting point is 00:16:29 Just the regular cinema. You went to the rich person's cinema, didn't you? No, it was the white cinema, just the regular one. And then you can get little crepes and stuff. Okay. They look pretty good. Little sliders. Okay.
Starting point is 00:16:38 And they bring it in or did you go in with it? I didn't go in. You didn't go in with it, did you? No, I didn't spring in for the luxury. Okay, fair enough. Would have been a waste yeah well you're right yeah and you would have felt
Starting point is 00:16:47 real bad about yourself what are we talking about oh yeah hors d'oeuvres hors d'oeuvres yeah I think less dwarves more Bilbo
Starting point is 00:16:54 more Gandalf more Evans and I know it's a dwarf story yeah can we say I don't like the way I say it
Starting point is 00:17:00 I say it like this but I just felt like this is my goal that's been achieved to make you feel self conscious but I feel like it wasn't my goal that's been achieved to make you feel self conscious but I feel like it wasn't
Starting point is 00:17:08 even though it's supposed to be a dwarf story they're not very interesting are they like I've seen three of these movies and I'm like
Starting point is 00:17:14 who's that one I don't like I know they look very different I know that but no you're right
Starting point is 00:17:19 other than Thorin yeah and the handsome one oh yeah the one that's not really a dwarf yeah
Starting point is 00:17:24 who's clearly like Just a short elf Yeah Aside from those two They're pretty much All interchangeable Yeah Like some are sort of
Starting point is 00:17:31 Blondish And some are sort of Red haired There's a big fat one Yeah A couple of ladies right Isn't that the No
Starting point is 00:17:37 Not in this Are they No not in this I thought the dwarf I thought dwarf women Also had beards They do But I don't think
Starting point is 00:17:43 Any of them are ladies I reckon one of them was I reckon the one with blowing the horn red hair I reckon that was a woman email in listeners email mate no
Starting point is 00:17:51 at wikipedia brown tell him specifically send me wikipedia links great I'd love it Gandalf obviously yeah but all those dwarves are interchangeable
Starting point is 00:18:00 yeah but I mean because it's it's unfair to compare it to like fellowship because the fellowship is clearly written as very distinct different races or species whatever you want to call it original old couples a series of original couples that's right and this is not as much so best part of hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy martin freeman there we go although um bill nighy no what's his face he's a a rapper. Zonk. No, not Zonk.
Starting point is 00:18:26 He plays Ford Prefect. Yeah, yeah, I know. Oh, God. Oh, Sam Rockwell's really good at that as well. Exactly. Yeah. It's a shame Stephen Fry's great at it as the narrator. Alan Rickman's the robot.
Starting point is 00:18:36 Yeah. Everybody's pretty great. What's his name, that rapper? I know who you mean. What's his bloody name? Oh, um, it'll come to me. Wait. He did that song with Ed Kowalczewicz once.
Starting point is 00:18:44 Yeah, he's part of Blackstar. Most Def. Most Def, that's right. Yeah. Great, we got there in to me. Wait. He did that song with Ed Kowalczewicz once. Yeah, he's part of Blackstar. Most Def. Most Def, that's right. Yeah. Good. Right, we got there in the end. Fantastic. Okay, so would you say that, having seen all three, do the dwarves have much of a character
Starting point is 00:18:57 arc? Are you kind of confused? Not really. I'm not confused. I just don't care. Does Thorin very rapidly go mad because of the gold? Yeah, it's kind of It's kind of alluded to
Starting point is 00:19:06 Oh spoilers by the way Yeah spoilers It's kind of alluded to In the last one But then he kind of doesn't Just sweet left turn Into madness Yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:19:12 Sweet left turn into madness And that probably happens In the book I don't know Well it would Yeah Not a great Not a great character progression
Starting point is 00:19:18 No What about Legolas Legolas He definitely looks older Doesn't he You know what some people in the cinema
Starting point is 00:19:26 I heard behind me went ugh like when he came up wow and you can't I think you settle into it yeah that's true but initially I'm like
Starting point is 00:19:35 like they have done some work on that like I think it's mostly makeup work and I think there's a lot of CGI to make him younger but it doesn't really work no
Starting point is 00:19:44 but you go okay, it's uncomfortable. You know what? Aside from that, aside from Legolas, Legolas? Dwarves. Dwarves. Legolas or Dwarves. You know how with the Star Wars prequels, you really shouldn't watch them first.
Starting point is 00:20:02 No. You know, there's some weirdly specific you should watch New Hope Machete Cut yeah you should watch New Hope Empire Strikes Back
Starting point is 00:20:11 2 and 3 yep and then Return of the Jedi and skip one skip one entirely yeah well I really think
Starting point is 00:20:17 The Hobbit based on the last one I've watched you should probably watch The Hobbit first yeah The Hobbit films first and then The Lord of the Rings only then The Lord of the Rings. Only because
Starting point is 00:20:25 The Lord of the Rings looks so much better. We'll get to that. The rest of the cast though. Kate from Lost. Galadriel. Hugo Weaving was in it for 30 seconds. He sure was. That's how it was Cate Blanchett.
Starting point is 00:20:40 Yeah, that is Galadriel. You're thinking of Kate from Lost as the other one. The one who falls in love with the little elf. Yeah, Galadriel. That's not Galadriel. Oh, I can't remember. You idiot.
Starting point is 00:20:53 I don't know. But yeah, it's cast well, isn't it? Yeah, sure. Yeah. Like, you know, everybody's fine in it. Except for the guy, you know the guy. Eh. Oh, yeah. Painful. Eh. That guy.
Starting point is 00:21:05 Painful. Didn't he get a real kind of story arc, didn't he? What was his story arc? He kind of... He's a weasel man. He's a weasel man. He escapes death a couple of times and then dresses as a woman and runs away. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:19 And why did Luke Evans be like, he's like, I'll be your second in command. And he's like, oh, right. Like, you hate that guy. Yeah, yeah. Like, why would you, you take someone you trust to, like, protect your kids. You don't pick the weasel man.
Starting point is 00:21:31 Yeah, who will gladly betray you for some gold. Yeah. Exactly. And he didn't get a comeuppance and maybe he doesn't in the book.
Starting point is 00:21:37 Probably, yeah. No, no, no, whatever. Yeah. Did you think it was, like, too CGI heavy, though? Very much so. Yeah. Do we have any more
Starting point is 00:21:44 casting notes? Anything else? No, I don't mean it. You go waving. He was there for a minute. You're right. Christopher Lee. Looks exactly the same.
Starting point is 00:21:50 Looks exactly the same. Boy, that... Yeah. Just think of Christopher Lee doing the actual stunts in that film. Just swinging a rod around. Just flipping over stuff. It's not happening, is it?
Starting point is 00:22:00 It's Dooku all over again. So that was like in terms of cowboy switching and like stats and stuff it was good pretty good i guess yeah i actually didn't mind that bit yeah okay with the and they fought all the the wraiths yeah so that was pretty good and you got some sour on them whatever oh yeah that was pretty good and that kind of that christopher lee thing led into him being corrupted where he's like i'll bloody take care of this. Yeah. But he didn't. That's true. What a dickhead. Ha ha.
Starting point is 00:22:26 So, oh, what about that weird Cate Blanchett freakout? Oh, yeah. That didn't look good. What was that? Yeah. Like, I know it kind of matches up in the original Lord of the Rings and Fellowship of the Ring. She has a similar kind of freakout.
Starting point is 00:22:38 Uh-huh. Do you remember? I remember it, but I remember it looking a lot better. Yeah. And making more sense, sort of. This was just like, what? Yeah. Okay. do we have any characters left? Little handsome
Starting point is 00:22:48 dwarf. Yes. The family of that guy. Oh yeah. Take him or leave him. Take him or leave him. What about the villains? The guy with the blade for an arm and the other one with the face plate. Oh yeah they look good. They um again I'm not sure how much CGI. That's all CGI. There you go. That's um
Starting point is 00:23:03 the guy who's the Blade for an Arm man. Yeah. Azog? I don't know what his name is. Bladesaw. Yeah, Bladesaw. That's Deadshot. Not Deadshot.
Starting point is 00:23:14 The other one from Deathstroke from Arrow. Oh, there you go. What's his face? Yeah, what's his face? Huh. So that's pretty cool. I feel like, though, for those guys in particular, Blade for an Arm, that's pretty cool i feel like though for those guys in particular blade for an arm yeah that's a good character model they've clearly put a lot of effort into that guy in particular yes
Starting point is 00:23:32 the other ones not as much um and is that the case because the what's the most recent video game shadow over model yeah shadow of model shadow of model shadow getting your model they've they've Shadow Over Mordor? Yeah, Shadow Over Mordor. Shadow Over Mordor. Shadow, get in your Mordor. They've put a lot of effort into the orc captains, right? Yes, they have. And, you know, if you injure one and he escapes, he comes back scarred from where you attacked him or what have you. Yeah, busted him. And I think that's what they've gone, we've sort of got to tie that together.
Starting point is 00:24:01 Let's make these orc captains very distinguished, you know, very distinguished. Yeah. Very distinguished with one on the blade arm, the metal bits in his face, et cetera, et cetera. I think one is also the son of the other one in that. Oh, okay, right. Yeah. I think the metal plate face, this is just from memory. Plate face is the son?
Starting point is 00:24:17 Plate face is the son of blade arm. Okay, right, sure. Uh-huh. Fantastic. Good to know. Did you like the weird rivalry that he had, the plate face had with Legolas? That carried over from the last movie.
Starting point is 00:24:27 Oh, I didn't really notice. I just thought it was happenstance that they both fought at the end. No, they fought in the last one as well. Okay, right. So that's a real rivalry. Yeah. Did Legolas put the plates in plate face's face? Plate face already had plate face.
Starting point is 00:24:39 In his face. But Thorin also, that guy's an enemy of Thorin. I think that guy killed Thorin's grandfather or father. Plague Face can join the long list of Hollywood villains with things in their face. Like Diamond Face from Die Another Day. I'll think of some others later in there. Absolutely. Yeah, definitely.
Starting point is 00:24:57 What about the weird... So, yeah, if we're talking CGI. Talking CGI. We're up to effects. I felt things like... Even when you'd see a horse run, sometimes it would do a weird little CGI shift. Huh.
Starting point is 00:25:08 And I don't know whether that was just me, but maybe it's the 48 frames per second thing or whatever. I saw it in regular frames per second. Oh, okay. You know what? 2D, regular size screen. I did see 2D as well. Regular frames per second.
Starting point is 00:25:18 See, I... Because it has to stand up as a movie. I saw it on a VMAX, which is like a slightly bigger than a regular screen. And I could see things like the wig mesh oh really interesting yeah because it was it was so bloody clear so that's a mistake on that's yeah and that's what they said as well with the first one because you can you can see um makeup and prosthetics when it's that clear yeah yeah but when you film it with regular film or even regular digital, that's kind of over.
Starting point is 00:25:47 So would you recommend that John Travolta be in a 48 frames per second film? Yeah. Well, I want to see it. Yeah, you do, yeah. He doesn't want it. He does not want to see that. Yeah, so,
Starting point is 00:25:57 especially during the opening sequence where Smaug is destroying the city, that felt... I was like, oh, they're is destroying the city, that felt, that, that, I was like, oh, they're an entirely CGI city. Yes. I don't know if it was or not. A lot of that was built. Right.
Starting point is 00:26:12 No, it doesn't. It didn't look like it. No, because it's got the fire backdrop and whatever. But a lot of that, you see a lot of that in the last film. Right. Also, that sequence, there were two sequences that I really enjoyed. That sequence, that was kind of terrifying. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:26:26 And then it was over very quickly. Oh, yes. And that dragon's quite menacing. Benedict Cumberbatch is the dragon. Ah, okay, there you go. He obviously plays a bigger part in the previous movie. Oh, that's fun, because then it's Martin Freeman versus Benedict Cumberbatch. Okay, that's quite clever.
Starting point is 00:26:41 Do you get it now? I get it now. It makes this one about the same, because they don't interact in this film. So great. Yeah, so I liked that part. The dragon looks great. You're making the snappy hand motion. I'm making the snappy hand.
Starting point is 00:26:54 There was also talk like they were never going to do a simian kind of mouth of the dragon. A simian mouth is much easier to replicate talking. Oh, yes. That dragon beak, not as much. But it still looks good. I think it's more impressive in the last one. dragon uh-huh simian mouth is much easier to replicate like talking oh yes the that dragon beak not as much but it still looks good i think it's more impressive than the last one right because it's the first time i saw it anyway uh-huh but did you care for the dragon i thought it looked pretty good it had kind of like a nice kind of alien-ish quality yeah like he's got like he'd sort of crawl his way through the city on like the he's got like little wing hands yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:27:23 and that was quite you're right quite terrifying yeah but uh yeah he was the best part of that but the the city i feel the city did not look good okay fair enough yeah i think that was definitely better in the last one or you saw more of it right okay so yeah so go back i won't i won't i thought also was this hang on what was the second part you really liked? Oh, the bit at the end where Blade Arm is under the ice. Oh, yes. And that was quite creepy. Because you're kind of like, is he kind of dead or whatever? And that was kind of clever how he dropped him into the ice.
Starting point is 00:27:53 Yeah. I don't know how he got out of the ice. From that point, I'm like, don't care for that. Maybe there was some ice under him and he kicked off the ice. Good point, he could have. I always find that odd in movies where somebody can leap out of the water. Yeah, yeah. With no...
Starting point is 00:28:06 Like, off nothing. Right, exactly. So, I don't know. Maybe orcs can do that, I guess. Very springy. What about the CGI Billy Connolly face? Um... Was that CGI?
Starting point is 00:28:18 No, I think that was makeup, right? It didn't look right when I saw it. It was way off. Because it didn't look exactly like Billy Connolly. No, it didn't look like him. It looked like a CGI face. Oh, right. Yeah, it did not look at all like him. You're right. But I think that's just the...
Starting point is 00:28:32 Because you have... You have a... You know. I think it's because the Billy Connolly voice is so distinctive that if it doesn't look exactly like him, it's confusing. Okay, fair enough. I don't know. I don't think it's just me. I think that's off. Alright, fine. Email Mason. No! Damn it!
Starting point is 00:28:49 What are... The battle sequences, though. They're all, obviously, a lot of that CGI. Yeah, and as we're talking about with, you know, the orc captains quite distinctive, others not very distinctive. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:03 That, I think, worked against it quite a lot. Yeah. It did look like they just got 10,000 versions of the same character model and put them all together. And obviously these were all not... Like, they just used prosthetics and, like, Orc masks in the last one, except for when you draw back and then it's a CGI thing.
Starting point is 00:29:20 But that's very noticeable that they are CGI. I thought so, yeah. And, like, even things like when you see an animal running, like whether it be a warug. Yeah, sure, a warug. Those weird kind of hyena things. Or the pig. Yeah. Though I think that reindeer, it's not a reindeer or something, like a moose, was it?
Starting point is 00:29:39 Oh, sure, yeah. I think that was animatronic when it was up close. Will you rise with the sun to help change mental health care forever? was animatronic when it was up close. with mental illness and addiction, that they're not alone. Help CAMH build a future where no one is left behind. So, who will you rise for? Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca. That's sunrisechallenge.ca. Oh, sure. It looked animatronic.
Starting point is 00:30:17 Animatronic moose. Yeah. I may be wrong, but yeah. That was, what's his name, Lee Pace. Yeah, from Guardians of the Galaxy and Pushing Daisies, as we mentioned. Yes, and younger than Orlando Bloom in real life. So that's very noticeable in that movie as well. Yeah, like if you remember the first Lord of the Rings,
Starting point is 00:30:36 there's the scene at the end where Sean Bean is killed repeatedly. He's killed so many times. And that kind of has that kind of it is quite visceral and it does feel very real and there's blood and the orcs are very they look like they're there they feel very individual
Starting point is 00:30:56 yeah and that was part of the plot that wasn't one of them kind of like a special I've been to that location and it just looks exactly like that yeah but I felt that was quite visceral and quite real and these were just sort of a special yeah and i've been to that location and it just looks exactly like that yeah yeah like yeah but i felt that was quite visceral and quite real and these were just sort of pixels running into each other it looked okay yeah exactly like it's all framed beautifully
Starting point is 00:31:15 and it's all very colorful and nice and it does it's it's an amazing achievement yeah it's just it's probably it's just too much i think there there were a few, especially after the city is burned in the first scene. Yeah. That looked quite CGI and I think they kind of felt like, well, we have to do some big establishing shots of New Zealand just to show how epic the scope is. Yes. Or real or whatever. Because this is in one location. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:38 So there's just a scene where they're just walking across some rocks and greenery. Yeah. And they do the stirring music and they just kind of wander across and nothing happens. And like, there's no, there's nothing particularly Lord of the Rings-y or Hobbit-y about it. The music.
Starting point is 00:31:51 They're just walking across New Zealand. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It felt a little kind of manipulative. Okay, right. Yeah. It definitely to me felt like it wanted to be like the Return of the King
Starting point is 00:31:59 of Hobbit movies. Oh, sure. In terms of like scope and scale. Right, right. It did have a lot of endings. It did have a lot of endings, didn have a lot of endings Which I guess is not Like you do have to wrap up All the disparate storylines
Starting point is 00:32:10 And join it into Yeah The Lord of the Rings At the same time But was Billy Connolly's face real? Look But no Like the blood
Starting point is 00:32:20 Like this is completely bloodless It is isn't it Yeah There's some beheadings There is Yeah there's a bit Yeah he gets them on the moose and he slices the head. Oh, he beheads them all with the moose? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:29 At one point, Handsome Dwarf beheads some people. Yep, sure. He's got a name, doesn't he? Yeah. In both real life and this movie. Whatever. Who cares? Handsome Dwarf.
Starting point is 00:32:40 Did you like the love story? Yeah, kind of. Really? Yeah, kind of. Okay? Yeah, kind of. Okay. Yeah. That really surprises me. It gives hope to short people to get tall, attractive girls.
Starting point is 00:32:52 I'm just saying. Sure. It hits home a little bit. Okay. But, but, what about at the end when she's like, why does it hurt so much? Oh, yeah, that was a bit, yeah. And he's like, because it's real, man. And she's like, sweet.
Starting point is 00:33:03 Yeah, great. Come on. Yeah, no, that was no good yeah And he's like Cause it's real man And she's like sweet Yeah great Come on Yeah no that was no good Yeah Yeah Anyway I thought the very tiny bit of chemistry They had was pretty good though
Starting point is 00:33:11 Yeah sure Okay fair enough Kate from Lost Yeah Speaking of that The I don't know what it is But the
Starting point is 00:33:19 Perspective tricks they used in this Yes Much more jarring I thought Oh really okay Yeah Did you think better Or do you think about the same I didn't honestly I didn't The only one I really noticed perspective tricks they used in this much more jarring i thought oh really okay yeah did you think better or do you think i didn't honestly i didn't the only one i really noticed was wet was between them on the shore of the river the between kate from lost and the handsome one yes and that's
Starting point is 00:33:35 very you notice it right because i thought especially when when blade arm fights thorin at the end yeah like when they finally i'm like that's jarring. Like they didn't do enough to establish their relative heights before they met. Oh, okay, that's fair. And I'm like, well now that's a little weird. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:49 Yeah. Okay, yeah, because you kind of, you forget that they're dwarves, don't you? Yeah. Because they're all kind of standing around shortish.
Starting point is 00:33:54 Exactly, and it's almost all dwarves speaking with dwarves and elves speaking with elves. And then a dwarf up in a castle shouting at you. Yeah, exactly, yeah, at a human or whatever.
Starting point is 00:34:03 And then it gets to these, and you're like, oh, that's actually quite jarring that they're all different heights. You know? Yeah, fair enough. Did you like the bit where the elves ran over
Starting point is 00:34:12 the back of the dwarves? Looked dangerous. Yeah, probably was. Didn't care for it. Probably an occupational health and safety nightmare. Did you like the bit where the worms popped out
Starting point is 00:34:21 and then disappeared? And then disappeared and nothing happened with the worms. Yeah, that was unnecessary. I guess they helped. Yeah. They did their... See, they're the eagles of the orcs world.
Starting point is 00:34:30 They show up when they need to and then they bugger off. Right, okay. Actually, I was going to say, when we're talking about character models, the giant orc creatures, you know, the ones with the catapults in their backs and the ones that smash through the... They all looked exactly the same. Okay, yeah, fair enough. And I didn't care. There was one that had a little arm. One did have a little arm yeah yeah yeah okay but other than
Starting point is 00:34:48 that i thought they all just got this they again if they if you're going to distinguish the you know blade arm and plate face yeah if you're doing bigger character models i think you need to distinguish them more like if you've thrown these giant creatures into battle more than once yeah they're going to be all scarred up and whatever yeah they're going to be scarred up I think you need to distinguish them more. Like, if you've thrown these giant creatures into battle more than once, they're going to be all scarred up and whatever, and they're going to be scarred up differently. If you're throwing them into walls, they're going to have, you know, torn up faces,
Starting point is 00:35:12 but they're going to be different. Did that one die that flew into that wall? It seems that way, yeah. It looked like he snapped his own neck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, given that Legolas could also kill them all with one arrow each, they couldn't be that resilient. I mean, I'd imagine that they're special arrows and he's a great shot at whatever as well.
Starting point is 00:35:28 Whatever, hit him in the jugular. He looks pretty old though, doesn't he? Yeah, boy, does he? Yeah, that's fair. He did, yeah. I think also there's more of that than there was in the last one. Like in the first Lord of the Rings, there's one. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:42 And I think by the time you get to Return of the King, there's a few more. But this was a lot yeah and yeah you're right they should have really I think so make a pink one make a blue one
Starting point is 00:35:52 exactly make a red one green one one has a katana one has a bow star exactly and then they all smush together
Starting point is 00:35:58 become a giant giant one exactly yeah that's it also speaking of Legolas and bad CGI and all the other stuff we've been talking about roundabout yeah there is the scene right at the end when the bridge is collapsing and he leaps on the falling rocks yes and gets that like a video game yeah like a collapsing mario i mean it's i guess at that point you're either invested in the world or not so that was
Starting point is 00:36:22 the breaking point i guess which is weird because there's giant monsters and and eagles flying about and a dragon or whatever yeah but and i understand he's light and agile or whatever but unless he weighs nothing unless well he there's a bit in the first lord of the rigs where he walks on snow and everyone else is sinking through it and he's just walking on top yeah i guess even then yeah yeah i guess so it was very lighty light it was like you were just happy to see those two characters finally have their showdown absolutely plate face and legolas yeah definitely oh so good is this one of those things though that does this make you want to either go and watch the original trilogy or watch the ones prior to this? I'll probably skim through Hobbit 1 and 2.
Starting point is 00:37:08 Okay. Like, I'll zip through. Go to the dragon bit. I'll watch the Martin Freeman scenes, probably. Does Gandalf have any good scenes? A little bit. Does Saruman have any good scenes? Yeah, he's got some...
Starting point is 00:37:18 Does Christopher Lee have some good scenes where he's confused as to why he's there? Christopher Lee's only in this one out of the first one. Right, okay. And he's at a council meeting and they're like Christopher Lee's only in this one and the first one. Right, okay. And he's at a council meeting and they're like, listen, there's probably darkness in the land. And they're like, yeah, maybe. It's like one of those scenes. Oh, great.
Starting point is 00:37:31 Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's pretty good. But I think all the Christopher Lee stuff was also shot in England because you wouldn't fly him to New Zealand again. No, absolutely not. The altitude would definitely kill him. So, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:45 At the end of this, I wasn't like, Absolutely not. The flight would, the altitude would definitely kill him. So, yeah. So, so, so, but you, at the end of this, I wasn't like, oh, lovely. It leads into the Hobbit. I mean,
Starting point is 00:37:51 these are the Lord of the Rings because they're like, go and see a ranger. He could be the king. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's his name? Don't worry about it.
Starting point is 00:37:58 Like, okay. And I would have, I like, I would have liked to have seen him, but I know Viggo Mortensen hates these movies. Oh, interesting. I didn't know that.
Starting point is 00:38:06 Like, he hates the originals. He's kind of bad-mouthed them. Does he hate the fandom, or does he hate... I don't think he likes... I think he... Did he have a bad filming experience? I don't think he did. Did he get trenched for it?
Starting point is 00:38:16 No, he probably did. I don't think he did. He said something along the lines of, they only really mapped out the first one properly, and then they had to go back and reshoot a lot for the second two. Because otherwise, if that first one didn't do well, they would have been straight to DVD. So he said there wasn't really a plan in place, and there was a lot of reliance on CGI by the end and whatever.
Starting point is 00:38:41 So the three Lord of the Rings films weren't filmed back-to-back? They were, but there was a lot of going back and filling in the three Lord of the Rings films weren't filmed back to back they were but there was a lot of going back and filling in the blanks and stuff okay right yeah so they basically said
Starting point is 00:38:50 okay we'll film most of the scenes for the first one yeah we'll put that out if it does well yeah we'll finish the rest
Starting point is 00:38:58 yeah we'll fill in those blanks and I don't and maybe the studio wasn't entirely aware of that right okay but that's how that's how it happened, yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:39:07 And he didn't like the constant reshoots? I'd imagine not. But I know also he built a good rapport with the other cast. Yeah, they all got tattoos and stuff. Yeah, they all got tattoos and shit. I wonder if everyone got Hobbit tattoos. I doubt it. I doubt it very much.
Starting point is 00:39:19 I know John Rhys Davies? Uh-huh, yeah. Is that the... Gimli. Gimli. He was the only one that didn't get a tattoo because he was allergic to the prosthetics. Oh, right.
Starting point is 00:39:30 And so he had this horrible reaction. But his stunt double, like the guy who you stand in, who was actually that size, did get the tattoo. So, yeah, there you go. And apparently him and Orlando Bloom became really close. So much so they now live together.
Starting point is 00:39:45 Oh, that's nice. It's not true. In the Hobbit huts. In the Hobbit huts. In New Zealand. Yes. So what about the bit at the end where Bilbo's like, and that's the end of my story.
Starting point is 00:39:55 And then Gandalf's like, I'm here for Lord of the Rings. Yeah, no, that was a bit much. Yeah. Is that the same scene as the...'s yeah it's pretty pretty much the same from bill lowe's perspective more right you see it from ganos perspective i think in the in the original i believe i might be wrong and so that was yeah i didn't like that no good bad uh my probably the part that i enjoyed the most towards the end was the bit where thorin throws the rock into the hands of yeah that was good that was good wait what and then he falls into the water that was my favorite part probably yeah did the audience laugh at any point
Starting point is 00:40:39 during there was a there was a i think there was a bilbo line from yeah i think there was a Bilbo line from Martin Freeman and somebody laughed there was something like that was it light? I guess I recall some of the Lord of the Rings films being lighter in tone there was a lot of Legolas Gimli back and forth where they've got this fun rivalry
Starting point is 00:41:00 which is a lot more fun I think than 12 men who look exactly the same yeah there's a dishwashing scene in the first one oh yes it goes for it's a song and they wash dishes great goes for like four minutes huh not i'm not joking because they didn't have podcasts back then so they needed to do something while they wash dishes sure but yeah i don't know what about the bit when in the i'll just jab it around the bit where they're like we're losing this battle I'm Billy Connolly
Starting point is 00:41:27 where's Thorin and he's like I'm here and like eight guys run out and they're like the tide of battle's gonna turn now yeah exactly
Starting point is 00:41:34 I thought because the big bell comes crashing through yeah and then they all come out and then you see like some some wooden metal
Starting point is 00:41:42 and whatever and I guess that was the bell but I expected them to have some sort of war vehicle. Oh, okay. Like a chariot or something. Or like in the last one, they melt down a bunch of gold and just pour it over the dragon.
Starting point is 00:41:52 Yeah, see, that would have worked. Yeah. Exactly. But that was Smaug, right? So it didn't kill him. Okay. No, because Smaug was all right. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:58 He's all right. Yeah. That was a special arrow that killed him. I don't know if you noticed. Yeah, magic arrow. Big one. Real big. Big one.
Starting point is 00:42:03 Just a big one. Yeah. Yeah. Got him. Where'd that come from? He had it in his heart it was hanging like some some stuff up like some groceries oh sure i'm not joking it was something like that so yeah there was another bit of one wait i know this is in the book like lake town there's so much land and you're not that far the town that burned down the town that burned down yes you're not that far... The town that burned down. The town that burned down. Yes. You're not that far from the land.
Starting point is 00:42:26 Why not live on the land? And then go out and fish like a regular person would. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, don't live in a weird, gross, wooden town in the middle of nowhere that's made of all wood near a dragon that you know is there. Uh-huh. And he's got to wake up eventually because he's a dick. Yeah. Like...
Starting point is 00:42:44 Ah, look, I'm just going to say The Magic of Middle Earth. Okay. Yeah. You got me, I guess. Yeah. It's probably some prophecy or something. Or like an old song about some hero who lived on the ocean or whatever. I think as well, the Luke Evans guy is clearly like the Aragorn guy.
Starting point is 00:42:58 Or Aragorn, if you will. Uh-huh. You know how like, I never understood this about the first Hobbit. I mean, the first Lord of the Rings movie And the books Aragorn's like I feel the burden Because my
Starting point is 00:43:10 My great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:13 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:13 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:13 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:14 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:14 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:14 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:15 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:16 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:16 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:17 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:18 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great
Starting point is 00:43:23 Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, that man right you have nothing to worry about and also it was what's his name's the bowman's grandfather i believe or it might have been father who initially wounded the dragon so he felt that burden as well but i wouldn't feel that burden i'd be like i didn't do this yeah like i think like you shouldn't feel that responsibility that's a good tip for life yeah if your father didn't kill a dragon don't feel no pressure. That's not on you. It's not on you, man. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:48 Look, I'll be honest, I'm glad it's over. I'm glad it's done. Great. The people, everybody I went with, same thing.
Starting point is 00:43:54 They're like, we're done. We're glad we're finished. Interesting. And look, I didn't hate it. Sean Willits, actually,
Starting point is 00:44:00 our animator friend, working on something cool at the moment. Interesting. I'm going to show you some stuff, actually. But he loved it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:06 He loved everything about it. And I can understand why you would. People are saying that this is like the best one since the original trilogy or even the second or third best one movie that's been made. Yes. I don't feel that way, obviously. But you do. Yes.
Starting point is 00:44:21 I loved it. It's the fourth best. Is that for you? I guess it's the fourth best. Yeah. It's time with Return of the King. you? I guess it's the fourth best, yeah. It's tied with Return of the King. What happened in Return of the King? Anything good?
Starting point is 00:44:32 I feel the high point for me was the two towers because Gandalf fights the Balrog. We see that happen. That was sweet, wasn't it? Drops a lightning bolt on it or whatever. Bam! Pretty good, right? That was good.
Starting point is 00:44:40 Yeah. Yeah. What were we talking about? I don't know. What best movie ever worst movie ever I'm gonna go best movie ever
Starting point is 00:44:50 for Plateface Plateface and Bladearm who I think were a good father son team you know really you felt the bond yeah you really
Starting point is 00:44:58 you know what I reckon I would have been you know it was great that the good guys won yep but it would have been great if the bad guys won and then Bladearm and Plateface went been you know it was great that the good guys won yep but it would have been great if the bad guys won
Starting point is 00:45:05 and then Blade Blade Arm and Plateface went fishing you know and it's sitting on a dock just fishing away you know
Starting point is 00:45:12 Plateface pulls up a big fish and then Blade Arm just guts it yep right there and then they get a photo together
Starting point is 00:45:18 they get a photo and they hug that would have been real good you know yeah okay look
Starting point is 00:45:22 I'm gonna say worst movie ever oh yes because I just feel this for me, this whole ordeal, and I didn't hate this movie. It was probably the best.
Starting point is 00:45:29 It was a chore. Oh, yes. And every time I see one of these, about 10 minutes in, I'm like, fuck. Like, what am I doing? I feel like that every time.
Starting point is 00:45:38 And there are some great moments in it, and I've said this before, as soon as somebody gets hold of these Blu-rays and cuts them into one film... Oh, yeah? That's going to be...
Starting point is 00:45:47 How much do you think they can take out? Most of the... Let's say these movies... How long are these movies all together? Like eight hours, you reckon? Yeah. You reckon they could cut that down to... I reckon they could cut it down to three.
Starting point is 00:45:58 Wow. Yeah. Huh. Well, if you can cut all of the other Lord of the Rings movies... Would they have to cut out Kate from Lost and Handsome Dwarf? Yes, because they're not in it. They're new characters. Oh, for this third one?
Starting point is 00:46:09 Yes. Oh. And the second one, the last one. They're not in it at all. Legolas is not in this. Maybe he's mentioned in the book. Right. But he's not in it.
Starting point is 00:46:16 No. And, like, the dude who rides the moose is in it. Oh, yeah. But... Obviously. But, like like that whole bit where Gandalf goes off and has his little adventure
Starting point is 00:46:27 which you saw the end of in this movie that's not in it Gandalf just fucks off and then he just reappears so that's new content for the movies
Starting point is 00:46:35 that's new content they feel that in was it a good adventure that's alright was it a little little fun I think all you would need to do
Starting point is 00:46:42 was build does he do any cool magic stuff here's an issue for you Gandalf Does he do any cool magic stuff? Here's an issue for you. Gandalf doesn't do any cool magic stuff. He does way more cool magic stuff than the last one. Oh, maybe we should watch that then. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:53 Alright, I'm going to watch Martin Freeman's scene. But he never does cool magic stuff. He'll shine like a light. Lightning bolt. Oh yeah, he does. Why is that Balrog? Yeah, that's probably the coolest thing he does. Yeah, for a guy with unlimited power who can't die, he doesn't do a lot, does he?
Starting point is 00:47:09 But I think if you were to edit it down, and I'm not going to do this. You know what? Even two movies is fine. I think you could get two out of this. But you'd go, you know, you've got the original bag and stuff. You cut out the dishwashing scene. Sure. Right? You don't need to focus on...
Starting point is 00:47:19 That's going to upset the purists, but whatever. You don't need to focus on the dwarf relationships because they're all... Even with this amount of film... It's disappointing for me dwarf relationships because they're all even with this amount of film disappointing for me even with this film this even with they're this length
Starting point is 00:47:29 you get no you get no kind of context for their relationship and whatever some of them you do you you have them meet the trolls you have them
Starting point is 00:47:38 go to the lake town briefly have them meet the fuckers meet the fuckers and then you have them go to the dragon and then they kill the dragon and then there's a battle, and then that's it.
Starting point is 00:47:46 Okay. Those are kind of what I imagine are the key parts from the book. And then Gandalf knocks on the door and says, it's time for Lord of the Rings. And then that's it. Right. But, whatever. If they're going to...
Starting point is 00:47:59 Look, I'd say they'll eventually make another one of these. Yeah. They'll make the Simmerman. Oh, yes. Or do something else. I don't know what. What do you think? Do you think they'll eventually make another one of these. Yeah. They'll make the Simmerman. Oh, yeah, Simmerman. Or do something else. I don't know what. What do you think? Do you think they'll dabble?
Starting point is 00:48:09 I reckon they'll bust out one more. Yeah. It might go straight to DVD. Oh. I don't know. Yeah. I think I've said this before. The first two made $2 billion worldwide.
Starting point is 00:48:18 Yeah. I'm not sure what. This one's doing incredibly well also. Okay, right. So, let's say just a bit under $3 billion maybe. Worst case scenario, $3 also. Okay, right. So let's say just a bit under three, maybe. Worst case scenario, three billion. Yeah, yeah. Like, they'll get another billion dollars out of it if they release it in cinemas.
Starting point is 00:48:32 Probably the Silmarillion. Maybe Adventures of Tom Bombadil. What's he been up to? We don't know, do we? We don't know, exactly. I reckon like some sort of diehard scenario. Yes. How about I would watch a bloody side call yeah and it's tom bombadil
Starting point is 00:48:45 like because you know it's very bold that they've written a gandalf like in a side adventure yeah that didn't happen in the books yeah like you know this regardless of whether you think they're well written or not to be like they're very well regarded and to just be like you know what we can beat that we'll write our own stuff and it'll be just as good as the books kind of thing. It is very bold. So in the spirit of that, I say Tom Bombadil's sidequel where he's like, he's, I don't know anything about the character. I've just picked him because he's not, because he's in the books, but not in the film.
Starting point is 00:49:18 I reckon just a kind of a sidequel where he's like, he's like, you know know just sort of getting stuff done in the background kind of thing yeah like he's blowing up bridges and he's you know so is he is he doing things that help them like maybe he weakened that thing that legolas tipped yeah maybe yeah exactly that we're talking about something like that okay fair enough cool i've just quickly googled villains with things in their face. Oh yes. Because you wanted another one. Well, Jaws from the James Bond film does. I don't think it counts because that's his jaw.
Starting point is 00:49:51 It's not in his face. Yeah. Thing in face. Great. They've got Anthony Hopkins here. He's got his mask. But I don't think that counts also. No, it's got to be in their face.
Starting point is 00:49:59 Yeah. Bane? That thing looks pretty much in his face. That's in his face, I'd say, yeah. Yeah. Because if you take it out, he dies. If anyone's got any villains who That's in his face, I'd say, yeah. Yeah. Because if you take it out, he dies. If anyone's got any villains who have things in their faces... In their faces, yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:09 Deadshot's got a thing in his face. Oh, he does. Yes, I mean... Depending... Penguin in the Arkham games has a thing in his face. Like a bottle... Bottom of a Coke bottle in his eye. In his face.
Starting point is 00:50:18 Yeah, it's in his face. That's pretty good. I'm trying to look here. Lobot from the Star Wars films. He's got those things on his ears. Doesn't count. No, doesn't count. No, I'm just... I don't think there's to look here. Lobot from the Star Wars films. He's got those things on his ears. Doesn't count. No, doesn't count. No, I don't think there's anything else here.
Starting point is 00:50:29 I'm sure there's some Bond villains that have things in their face. Yeah, but branch out. They've all got stuff in their faces. Diamond Face is the king of those. Boy, is he. So that's The Hobbit. Great. And that, man, this ran quite a long time.
Starting point is 00:50:43 Yeah. All right, how about... Yeah, that's what the people want do they I had a lot of thoughts for this film we found quite middling so
Starting point is 00:50:50 did you see some good trailers though I saw Star Wars on the big screen that was cool oh yeah the Volkswagen trailer I didn't see that I've seen it
Starting point is 00:50:58 I saw like 25 minutes of ads and trailers at the front of this thing what did you see Taken Taken 3 actually looks really good well I say next week maybe instead of doing like a 2015 like most anticipated we'll save that for when summer approaches as big blockbusters maybe and we'll do next week we'll do maybe take and agent carter ant-man trailer because that's out this week as
Starting point is 00:51:19 well totally do that yeah so maybe you know but the people want something else just if you want another hobbit one we'll do that, we'll do more Hobbit films. Yeah. How about we talk about the other two Hobbit films and then you listen to them whatever order you want. Listen to next week's first week and then... Exactly. Did you see they released the Ant-Man trailer in ant size?
Starting point is 00:51:38 I did, yeah. What a bunch of dicks. So you didn't like that? No, it was funny. I was like, that's pretty funny. Yeah, I think... Then they released it real size. I haven't seen that yet.
Starting point is 00:51:45 Yeah, it's not much to it. But you know what? People are like, I hate trailer for trailers, right? People hate them. I used to hate them. And so I started making trailer videos and I'm like, sweet. Plan my week around it. Yeah, nice.
Starting point is 00:51:55 So I love it. You hate it. I'm ambivalent. You hate it. Yes. Oh, yes. But Taken 3 looks actually pretty good. As we mentioned before before it's not just
Starting point is 00:52:05 him plowing through like a hundred dudes i think that was the second one as well but the second one's set over like two blocks don't watch it all right okay i'll watch it i don't care all right well we'll see what we do next week yeah we might see something to do with trailers or upcoming videos yeah movies or whatever would i be so bold oh yes as to sneak in a cheeky what we read and what we're gonna read oh do Oh, do that, yeah. Maybe I'll speed up the theme song. Okay, sure.
Starting point is 00:52:28 I'll do the theme. I thought that was exhausting. We got an email from a guy called Adam Gazowski. Oh, yes. And he's a colourer. What's the word for
Starting point is 00:52:42 comics? Colourist. Yes. He does the colours. Oh, yes. Like comic books. And he's a colorer. What's the word for comics? Colorist. Yes. He does the colors. Oh, yes. Like comic books. And he's at the moment working on something called Nailbiter, which is like a horror. Anyway, I'll read his email.
Starting point is 00:52:54 Oh, sure. And then I'll tell you what's going on. Definitely do that. Do I have to read it super fast because we're doing this quick? No, you're not good at regular speed. So try and... Oh, maybe super fast is your thing, though. Hey, guys.
Starting point is 00:53:02 I color... No, can't do it. Hey, guys. I colour comics such as this one which is the nail biter I ended up listening to a ton of podcasts
Starting point is 00:53:09 while at work and look forward to you guys each week anyways I've coloured yeah anyways I've coloured many a page whilst listening to you dude
Starting point is 00:53:15 so I figured I'd shoot you a copy of my book thanks guys fuck art from Adam uh Guzowski that's his spirit yeah
Starting point is 00:53:21 and you know what yes it's really really amazing excellent and i'm this isn't like he full disclosure he gave he sent us a free copy like through comiXology or whatever yes but if it wasn't good i would probably not bring it up like yeah definitely yeah you wouldn't bring it up to pay out on here no i certainly like listen about this idiot yeah colorist yeah what even is that but like i heard i'd like I heard of this, but I hadn't read it. But it's basically, it's this small town where a whole bunch of serial killers,
Starting point is 00:53:50 specifically 16 serial killers have come from, which is an unusual amount of serial killers. Oh, yeah, definitely. And it's basically, it's the mystery behind. Is this a true story or is this? No, no. Are they bred there? Are they, you know, is it a coincidence and whatever?
Starting point is 00:54:04 So it's this kind of murder mystery. And is it is it a coincidence and whatever so it's kind of murder mystery and it's it's incredibly like visceral and and whatever it's amazing artwork and it's it's a really really uh clever story it's it's image as well which is good so they they're on a bloody roll at the moment yeah it's image comics but uh yeah i'd highly recommend it he said it's the first volume but i downloaded the like four or so issues that were after that so i bought them myself oh yeah afterwards so make of that what you will definitely worth a read if you like horror comics like if you can kind of handle it then yeah if not stay away mason yeah i'm terrified everything do you just pee on my couch yeah
Starting point is 00:54:41 anyway uh what i've been reading i uh I mentioned last week, I watched Black Mirror, White Christmas. That's so good. So good. It was harrowing. I love that show. And it had a mind in a computer, which is my favorite thing. Yeah, I know. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:54:58 Johnny Depp in Transcendence probably got a thing in his head. Yes, sure. That's it. Yeah, that show i wish it was on all the time but they do like the last two episodes three episodes were at the start of 2013 and this one was at the end of there was one at the end of last year and that's that's all that we've had yeah yeah though charlie brooke who writes them he do you watch his 2014 white the white no i haven't seen that yet. That's so good.
Starting point is 00:55:25 Especially if you're English. He does like a recap of the year. Which we are. Which we are. Does a recap of the year and they're always some of the funniest stuff Pretty great, yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:32 I watched last year's, it was really good. Yeah. So I'll get onto that. He's bloody quality. So yeah, what do you think of White Christmas though? Good.
Starting point is 00:55:37 I think this one, some of them have twists and some don't. Yeah. And I, without spoiling anything you pick it
Starting point is 00:55:48 quite early on I'm like oh I see you know what this is when they introduce a certain piece when they introduce an element
Starting point is 00:55:54 yeah to it I'm like oh clearly then that's what is happening here but I think the performances are great
Starting point is 00:55:59 yeah the ham John Ham's good in it the other guy he's good in it yes he's in a lot of stuff he's usually in comedies
Starting point is 00:56:05 but I can't pick from which one yeah me neither whatever anyway it's great if guys if you like a harrowing Christmas experience
Starting point is 00:56:12 New Year's holiday experience watch Black Mirror doesn't have to be Christmas either yeah just watch it anytime anytime you want to feel bad about everything somebody once reached out to me on Twitter
Starting point is 00:56:20 said I watched Black Mirror I didn't like it like anything we recommend give it 10 minutes max if you don't like it whatever yeah anything we recommend, give it 10 minutes. Max, if you don't like it. Yeah, whatever.
Starting point is 00:56:27 Yeah, that's it. Also, I just want to give a quick shout out to Billy Arundel, whose birthday was on the 2nd of January, he turned 23. He's like a big Patreon and Redbubble wearer, T-shirts and stuff. I see him on the Twitter stuff. Yeah, he's a good dude. So, happy birthday, Billy. We did it. Yep.
Starting point is 00:56:45 That's the show. Happy birthday, Billy sounds We did it. Yep. That's the show. Happy birthday, Billy. Sounds like a sad statement. Like Billy's always an orphan boy. Happy birthday, Billy. I got you a new flat cap. Yeah. A new weathered flat cap.
Starting point is 00:56:58 That's it. So that's the shortest show this week. We actually did one under an hour. There you go. We did it. Woo! Unless I can pad this out over an hour. I'll just go back and edit it myself.
Starting point is 00:57:07 Just go, oh, yeah! Just every... Well! You know? Yeah. That's the show, man. Grab that gem. No, we're going to...
Starting point is 00:57:17 Contact. Do you want to talk to us? Okay. We're at weeklyplanetpod at Gmail and Facebook and Twitter. I'm at wikipediabrown on Twitter. I'm at mrsundayMovies. If you want to contribute to the show, it's patreon.com slash MrSundayMovies. But don't feel any pressure.
Starting point is 00:57:33 I'm pointing to you, James. I feel the pressure. Yeah. People on holiday, a lot of people have been Twittering me saying, hey, I've been listening to your commentaries. Yeah. So we've still got those up. Yep, they do.
Starting point is 00:57:42 And we still haven't done a new one yet. No, we will. But it's theweeklyplanet.bandcamp.com. That is, yeah. I think, yeah. And I also want to do another video game, Never Go Back thing. Oh, yeah, definitely.
Starting point is 00:57:51 I don't know when, but you want to do that? At some point before we die, we'll do those. Yeah, definitely. It'd be pretty great. If you like the show, tell a friend. Yeah, you know what? Not straight away. Yeah, tell a friend straight away.
Starting point is 00:58:01 Turn to the person next to you, whoever they are. It doesn't have to be a friend. Yeah. If you're on the bus, just to the person next to you whoever they are it doesn't have to be a friend if you're on the bus just shake the person next to you if you're in a car listening just veer your car
Starting point is 00:58:10 into the car next to you and when the guy gets out to be like real angry just be like listen this is not what I'm listening to
Starting point is 00:58:15 they're talking about The Hobbit and iTunes as well if you want to rate us on iTunes we'd love that or subscribe or something
Starting point is 00:58:22 or subscribe because that helps I guess somehow we don't know that's a lot of plugs I don't know how it works a lot of plugs this week you know what everybody's like
Starting point is 00:58:31 you listen to a podcast and everybody's like yeah remember to rate us on iTunes and subscribe because that really helps us out what if it doesn't and everybody just says that and then everybody else who does a podcast hears that yeah exactly it probably does nothing that being said if it does I don't still rate us because I don't know Says that. And then everybody else who does a podcast hears that. Well, that's how I'd know. Yeah, exactly. It probably does nothing.
Starting point is 00:58:46 That being said, if it does, I don't... Still rate us. Because I don't know. Yeah. If we're the only people not doing it... Oh, then we're buggered. Yeah, we're at all sorts. Totally.
Starting point is 00:58:54 So, yeah. Anyway, that is a lot of plugs for this whole episode. I love the specifics of how that works. But anyway, yeah. Yeah, we'll never know. Anyway, guys, hashtag grab that dat gem. That's the one. Grab dat gem.
Starting point is 00:59:04 Happy holidays still. Happy holidays. Okay, bye.

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