The Worst Idea Of All Time - 05: Pasta

Episode Date: September 9, 2020

It's time for some Memento style story-telling because they had to swap actors for the star of the series and we, the softcore audience need a retconned explanation! A Shining Light in record time involving a horse telepathically communicating with the viewer and phantasms! There's a lot of rubbing and caressing but (as you'd expect) no pene and no movement on Boner Patrol. The production of this particular Emmanuelle is pretty freaky, featuring multiple directors and a key question - Is this interesting? Plus an exploration of the limitations of male fantasy by Guy's partner.JOIN US ON FACEBOOK: facebook.com/WorstIdeaOfAllTimeVISIT THE LITTLE EMPIRE PODCAST NETWORK: littleempirepodcasts.comMUSIC CREDIT: Tender Moonlight (facebook.com/TenderMoonlight)ART CREDIT: Tomas Cottle (sick-days.com)DISCORD: discord.gg/KVMF3uH Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music

Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music

Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music

Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music

Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music

Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Music Hello and welcome along to the worst idea of all time, season five. Oh come, oh come, Emmanuel. Six!

I'm Guy Montgomery. I'm with Tim Batt, not physically, but in spirit, as we have both just watched the 1988 released french softcore erotica film emmanuel six we are no longer in the company of sylvia christelle of course there's a new emmanuel there's a new director at the helm there's a whole new whole new a whole new feeling to this movie um a whole new world how are you tim brand new exciting point of view no one to tell us where to go oh i've forgotten the rest of the words or say we're only dreaming i'm good thanks um yeah i'm good i'm good i quite like this movie i i'm not gonna lie to you tim this is what i imagined this movie is what

i'd imagined when we embarked on this journey this is the genre of skin flick to which i was looking forward to which i remember growing my first pubic hair this is the sort of um early 2000s 12 30 a.m on a fr a Friday night pornographic material I remember coming of age to coming spelt C-O-M-I-N-G nothing untoward about it

growing up I loved it so much I wasn't the only thing growing up back then Tim what else was growing up? well if I watch it flip like this so too was my oh god what? you don't even know what i'm gonna say what are you gonna say my dogs my sisters everyone around me we were all

growing it was a heady time heady cool um so i put my enjoyment of this film down almost solely to Professor Simon. How fucking good was that bald-headed man who delivered every line with zero facial expression, but 200% vocal expression? I think it's unfair to say he had no facial expression. I thought he was putting a little stank on everything he said. And before we get into the movie, I just want to ask, are you and I cool, bro? Yeah, we're cool. Okay. This is going to get really long in the tooth, this season of 52 Softcore Pornos,

if every time we open you insist on relating it to the growth of your penis. I not once mentioned that. It's disgusting what you've done. Yeah, yeah, I'm the bad guy. As always. The clue's in the name. You're a guy. You're the bad guy. What about the bad guy as always the clues in the name your guy you're the bad guy what about the good guy yeah that's true you're that too um professor simon man let's get into it he's a hero this dude rules yeah he was um i mean before we even get to him because he was

introduced very early and immediately as soon as he was on screen, I was like, this is going to be a fun watch. Also, as soon as the movie was demonstrably very poorly overdubbed in English, I was relieved. I couldn't have stomached another hour and 20 minutes of piecing together a story in a language I don't understand. Well, that kind of confuses me because like i guess you were definitely right but a lot of it really matched up perfectly i know the movement of their mouth because i was

looking at some of it and it was maybe some of the characters did speak in english i think they did i think i think that the production of this film was a real challenge. I love any skin flick that starts with someone slowly and erotically putting their clothes on. It has immediately got me on the hook. So rarely do we see people dressing before they then undress. Usually they're either already in a state of undress or clothes. So rarely do we see, you know, it's like watching someone climb the mountain

and then really feeling the relief and jubilation as they come back down. It is like that, Guy. Seeing someone put their clothes on is like watching someone climb a mountain. Okay, you little fuck. Natalie Yuhu is the titular Emmanuel this time

and I thought she put in a great performance yeah I thought she was tonally consistent I thought that the source material that she was working from was pretty confusing I guess we can talk about the professor now because it does help

establish what the story of the film is. But essentially the movie kicks off with Emmanuelle suffering from amnesia as she travels to this sort of country estate of this very animated, bald professor who wants to try and help solve her amnesia. And in doing so, discover... Like, what is the purpose of their relationship, Professor to Emmanuel? Is he purely there to solve her amnesia? Is he a horny professor who's trying to sort of surreptitiously take sex anecdotes from Emmanuel?

This is what I love about it. He's not that horny, and he plays such a crucial role in the film, and he's so important, particularly to the start of it. And he's like, he looks like Harry from Sex and the City. Yeah. Like a lot, I think. He looks like Runkle.

He's, I, I do, you go. His whole, like, his whole thing is that Emmanuel has, like, this is beautiful storytelling. They've had to change the actor, like in the Bond franchise. I've mentioned this before. But in Emmanuel, they're like, we better explain this to the audience because they're going to want to know what happened.

So there's all these pseudo poetic lines about emmanuel being a chameleon uh delivered by professor simon and simon is there to try and draw the past from emmanuel who is now embodied by a slightly different physical form about what has happened leading up to this point and so the whole film is a collection of flashbacks um that we get to explain what has happened in a memento kind of style back and forward non-linear storytelling style um about what has brought emmanuel to the point of coming to the professor and as as you mentioned guys she's got a sort of very specific limited form of amnesia so she's getting bits and pieces and the professor is pushing her

to go further and further because i don't know how he knows this but he knows that emmanuel is this like sexual archangel who who needs to rediscover her sensual form and he keeps pushing her to do so and uh involved with that seems to be like a form of therapy that he conducts on her and then also just watching people fucking some horse stables because that's gonna like bring you back to yourself he knows he knows that at her essence is a sexually open and explorative woman and that if he can just unearth her memory of herself she has this treasure trove of horny and eventually quite troubled memories that uh she can share i agree that it's funny he's not really horny is he he is he is sort of in that respect he's very much there to serve his role as i call them the host of emmanuel i sort of thought him as

the host of the movie he sort of grounds us he says welcome and come into my manor here's who i'm going to be talking to here's what she's dealing with and we're going to be going to some pretty horny places let me let me give an early early shining light to do with this my favorite bit is that his narration i can't remember what he was saying in this specific moment is running over the top of some footage that we're seeing in the horse stables and the shot lingers on a horse for too long and it suddenly looks like the horse is talking to us about emmanuel's sexual journey and i got a real kick out of the idea that like an established pornographic franchise would use the vehicle of a telepathic horse to communicate this sort of meta narrative

of what's going on yeah i um the horse scene was great because the stable boy eventually does reveal that he's actually horny for emmanuel but there's a long time of shots of him very close into the horse where i'm like is he wanting her to become aroused so pretty much the host of emmanuel and by the way this is my favorite way to watch a porno is i love a porno told in flashback by a bald man holding a toy bus which is what we get for at least a few minutes towards the first third of the film but to try and jolt emmanuel's amnesia he uh sets up one of his stable boys to to to show up to emmanuel's room or like you know just run across her walking the grounds outside and go you got to come with me and they go and in the barn there are two people having sex and it's like you like this remember yourself

you like this don't you know that remember fucking emmanuel yeah you love fucking she does like this um but i yeah their dynamic was great when chelsea chelsea was sort of drifting in and out while i was watching this uh film and i said she sort of was quite in uh enamored by i think a lot of the production values and just the visual style and um as soon as she saw emmanuel sitting next to that the host of Emmanuel, she said, oh, this is a classic, him and her porn dynamic. And I said, you know what? Based on the evidence of this franchise so far, I can guarantee you that guy is not getting any pussy this whole movie.

Like he is very much. He didn't, right? I didn't tune out for a bit. Absolutely not. He was literally just there to service the story. I don't believe in phantasms. I'm just a young woman with a case of amnesia who's not even sure if she wants to remember her identity.

I also wrote down that quote. It's just like... He also... That was Emmanuel talking to the professor. And the professor also, like, he seems to be trying to eyeball the camera, but, like, he's got it cross-eyed or something. He sort of, at the end of his sentences,

it's almost a crutch of his acting technique. He does look slightly to the left or right of camera and sort of, like, move all body parts of his face that he can so like as soon as it's have more meaning or emphasis at the end because it was sort of go and they finished like this and everything's just got a bit more zhuzh on it at the end it's like his performance was really hammy and the accent that was overdubbed was somewhat british and it just lent this really relaxed comical tone that meant it didn't feel like the movie was taking itself too seriously and then i didn't

have to take it too seriously like this was a bit of a romp the whole way through not really erotic like i'll dip into a quick boner patrol nothing over here not even a twitch you i i had a stirring um but no evidence of an actual boner um what bit was it oh i think it was when they were kind of i think they were trying to like find a woman for emmanuel the professor was and someone was at the house and he was like i must see this woman first so she's like all right i guess i'll have sex with her first in front of you yeah remember that bit because i just lays her out on the desk yeah yeah i i do i mean yeah it's obviously there are moments of mild eroticism but um it just like the whole movie was really fun i thought until the very end when they'd sort of set up this um, I guess, that they wanted to resolve. And when they decided that they had to resolve the story...

They'd set up a... Fuck, what's the word I'm looking for here? They'd set up a kind of a... Well, a story, I guess. Yeah, some kind of plot. It's like, I just... The whole movie sort of read as less erotic to me than previous installments and more it was just like uh semi-nude and confusing but it was a cool silly adventure

because okay except and we're not going to like dwell on this too much because it's a bummer and there's no point in um scrutinizing this film unduly but there's like uh quite a bit of the third act for some reason rests on like essentially human trafficking going on yeah women in india um which is weird and uh it doesn't really need to be there but up until that it's just like it's all of these women who are explained to be models and kind of friends, I guess, who are in their mid-twenties rocking around India. No, no, they're not in India. They were in Venezuela. Why do they keep saying Indians then?

And we're an Indian country and we've got to look out for the Indians because they're quiet. Because it's an American film from 1988, which means that anyone who's not... Oh, so they're talking about the indigenous people in Venezuela. Yeah, because they keep talking about Caracas. And the bus is in Caracas and they get on the cruise line in Caracas. And like, anyway. So here's the thing. Okay, I didn't fully get where this kind of came from, but they've got jewels.

They've got very expensive jewels, these women. The collection of women, which Emmanuel seems to be a part of. And this is all in flashback. So this is like maybe what happened between Emmanuel 5 and 6, I guess? I also just quickly want to chime in by saying all of the scenes with the model friends are very much in the wheelhouse of a a 13 year old boy's fantasy about what happens when women spend time exclusively with other women,

which is like, they're always taking their tops off and sort of splashing water at each other or taking little photos on the bus. It's got that same 13 year olds lack of knowledge about what sex is. So there's lots of like, you never see a vagina. There's lots of kind of rubbing and caressing but nothing else there's zero penetration of anything that kind of happens

it's just like what a 13 year old kind of suspect they're like they're building up to the idea that sex exists through like the yeah the knowledge that women have bodies they don't know the parts they just know that they have physical, you know. They've got boobs. Yeah. There's boobs, so we've got to see the boobs. There's a guy who's been hired by an insurance company to safeguard the jewels.

So he's, like, among the women in quite a friendly capacity. And he has sex with Emmanuel, right? Yeah, they are a bit of a Ross and Rachel, will they or won't they? And then eventually, just by hanging around and being a good guy really, Emmanuel throws him a bone. Yeah, he kind of is a guardian of this woman.

But it's just so funny. It's been hired by the insurance company to look after the jewels which are being transported via these women for some reason um they then get intercepted by the captain i think he's the second officer they're on this they're traveling on this ship this cruise ship to go somewhere yeah and one of the more sort of erotic scenes is uh while they're on the ship there's this very villainous second officer who is the the the primary antagonist i guess and he both he and the insurance guy have sort of outlined to emmanuel that they're horny and she's like i don't want to have insurance guy

doesn't he doesn't telegraph it that he does he comes in he delivers a bottle of bubbles and two glasses to her room he's in he's like there to protect the jewels. That is a declaration of horn. But anyway, she waves them both off and she's like, no, no, I want to have real bestial sex. And then she climbs down into the coal shuffling area of the ship where these two smoking hot shirtless guys are just sort of, you know, very glistening in sweat and shoveling coal.

And she just, there's nothing better. I remember back when I used to shovel coal on a cruise liner, when one of the beautiful passengers of the ship would just come down to the coal shoveling station and just sort of eyeball one of you for a quick route in the middle of a shift. Yeah. And it is, that scene was fucking cool like it looked like a levi's commercial it did it was just these calvin klein i thought but it had real

fucking jeans commercial vibes real yummy sweaty dudes shoveling coal with abs are glistening and i'm talking eight pack get out of here with the six pack nine abs are glistening seven coals are shoveling six testicles yeah that's probably right actually because the villainous second mate comes in just what so five fingers and four toes hot three people a part of the sexual tryst. And two people coming in. One really horny scene. Thank you. Nice one.

Emmanuel sort of makes her selection out of the two guys. It's like, I'm going to... I was going to say, fuck this guy, but that really doesn't happen. They kind of rub each other's bodies for a really long time and they don't even kiss it's right inside of the 30 year old boy's fantasy it's like all of the sex scenes exist in this like i don't know what happens then you know like it's like a 13 year old director with like a whole production staff is desperately trying to fill in the blanks of what he doesn't

know about sex is like yeah you just like take take your top off and then you you rub each other heaps right so there's there's lots of that and then it's kind of like going into direction where it looks like emmanuel is going to give this guy a blow job but sort of that never happens either but while there's all this kind of sensual rubbing of bodies um the dudes the other dudes so that the other coal shoveler and the villainous um second officer who's who's like hidden behind a steel pipe somewhere they're just looking on yeah like uh but one of like families it's an interesting dynamic because one of the one of of the guys who shovels coal, he's very much there with permission.

And it's part of the charm. But the second officer, this guy is just stewing. He's just furiously watching these guys get theirs. And he becomes so incensed. He basically goes into Emmanuel's room to sexually attack her. And then out of a chest that's in her quarters, in Emmanuel's quarters, comes this topless woman who grabs the bottle of champagne and just smashes the second officer over the head and lays him out

cold who previously had only been introduced to us the audience because when emmanuel would leave her room the woman who lives in the trunk would leave the trunk to take pieces of fruit back to her trunk if all of this sounds confusing you got to bear in mind this entire movie is told by two unreliable narrators one of them the host of the film who wasn't there for any of the meat of the story and secondably emmanuel who is recovering from amnesia like the way that they sort of overlay the stories and who's telling them is it's so delightfully chaotic that you can immediately take your hand off the wheel and say i don't need to put the pieces together i can just enjoy the performance and the decisions and i've got here in the trivia section of imdb tim that this was um this production was mired in in challenges this is the third three bits of trivia and this third one is um it provides a lot more information than i realized

this is the director credited with the disastrous production of emmanuel six is bruno zinconi a former editor unprepared for a south american shoot and with an inexperienced actress as his lead gene roland told peter blumenstock and the pages of video watchdog and virgins and vampires that he stepped in which is obviously some sort of uh book that reminisces about the the emmanuel productions uh that he stepped in to complete the film when zinconi couldn't go back and finish it because he had another job to go to with the film only partially completed and the investors understandably angry and worried roland stepped in with little to no prep and finished the film roland recalled to bloom and stock that one of his main contributions to emmanuel

six was coming up with the idea of emmanuel having lost her memory an admittedly absurd touch that at the very least recalls some of roland's past glories so like even the amnesia storyline the reason it feels so haphazard is because it was introduced halfway into the production even though by the time you watch the movie it is very much the defining feature of the narrative i reckon it was a great choice i applaud it i think it was a cool thing to tell you i haven't really seen a lot of this on imdb pages i don't spend that much time on imdb but at the bottom of that piece of trivia instead of x number of people found this interesting it's just the question is this interesting is this interesting i think it. I think it definitely is for a guy named Tim Baird

and a guy named Guy Montgomery. Another favorite bit of mine of this flick, this is Shining Light number two. We're in uncharted waters now for the Emmanuel series. The professor hires, because the science bit isn't working, some, I'm going to call them witches to jog emmanuel's memory and this leads to a scene with some real synthy jazz playing and a naked woman just doing a um performative dance in the desert and i don't even think emmanuel is there to watch it

but somehow this combined with uh snakes being around is gonna bring her memory back because uh humans relationship with reptiles is one of according to the emmanuel series sort of sexual intrigue and repulsion jointly there's this really cool guy who shows up very late in the film and he's wearing this blue and white vertical striped shirt predominantly blue with thin white stripes and glasses and he's got a great energy and he sort of looks he's explaining the the reason for introducing the the witches and the reptiles and he says uh not unlike who's the guy from um csi miami who keeps taking his sunglasses off oh yeah he's got he's got the same energy as that

guy where he's like um yeah every line is some beautiful pun reptiles fascinate human beings and then he takes his glasses off and says in a strange way and you think i mean the delivery of the line alone is worth the price for admission i can't wait to see what strange ways these reptiles fascinate these humans and he's not wrong this witch performs a dance with a python and it makes emmanuel so horny and comfortable and confident within herself it cures her amnesia and the only way to close this film out is with her masturbating fully clothed in an empty dirt field at sunset that's cool i reckon that's a cool ending i guess it's like this is the thing about art sometimes when you are driven to make such outrageous decisions because of constrictions

that have been put on you like for example the director of your film having to bail midway through and you you suddenly have to make some decisions some beautiful chaos can come out of there and i think this whole thing of uh emmanuel having selective amnesia it's a fun vehicle to be able to do whatever you want flashbacks flash forwards to the present crazy characters pseudoscience witchcraft snakes it's all part of the thrust of trying to get this woman back to her sexual self. It was really fun. I mean, this was like, if this marks the sort of the beginning of the end of quality control

in the Emmanuel franchise and just like this is the first slippery step towards a mess of like the movies I imagine we'll be watching, I'm excited because I've said it before, I'll say it again. A porno that starts with someone getting dressed and is immediately then thrown over to a narrator who is just this really animated caricature of a bald man in a big old house trying to remember someone else's story

that's how i want to consume my pornos hey what does chelsea make of this season guy what does your partner think of you watching a softcore porno with your boy tim every week i don't know i could i could see if she wants to come in and answer that question herself i mean like we haven't really discussed it it's just this whole season it's just sort of crept up and then now it's it's happening like i think um she was sort of doing uh menial jobs around the house for context everyone this is being recorded inside of auckland's second lockdown so this is the first episode that's uh i i certainly feel uh like i'm in a different mental space because we're back in the house and so she was i am massively agitated which i think you can uh you you're grabbing a bit of that yeah i'm finding life incredibly difficult as well our hearts go out to everyone who is doing the same

thing doing this the whole time um but i think she quite like at least she really enjoyed getting to dip in and out of emmanuel six today uh you know the obvious uh gripes aside about the you know the genre or like not the genre of film but just the time that the film was released but um she enjoyed dipping in and out and like yeah i think i don't know she's kind of she kept laughing at the idea of what male fantasy is she's like this is so it's so funny to see if she's every male fantasy is a man staying exactly the same as he is dressed in normal clothes and then all of these very scantily clad and like light moving woman parading themselves around him while he just does nothing like he does nothing out of the

ordinary at all and everyone else is in fancy garb um oh shit she got us dude she fucking got us our fantasy has been laid bare what'd you think of the soundtrack of this one i thought it wasn't as consistently brilliant as no but some of the prior ones but moments of shining glory it was um yeah it was more eclectic which i loved like it was certainly there was some sort of emmanuel reprise they kept coming back to but aside from that uh i liked like it sort of it would follow it just it was it was very open-minded it was like a bit of a jam of a soundtrack like it didn't abide any one overriding theme there was some heavy 80s synth at points like i remember at one moment there was a some sort of uh sex scene involving the um i mean it's who the in the movie they called her an indian but

it's the woman who was living in the trunk who i i think it was just a venezuela like a an indigenous venezuelan but um there was some sort of sexual fantasy with her and they had this like this pan flute playing and then the next scene was immediately heavily 80s, and so the segue was this very harsh movement from sort of an approximation of traditional Venezuelan pan pipes into fashion, fashion, model, model. Those scenes were fun. I was mentally drifting in and out but there was like a fashion

show right that they were at well sort of never like made a big deal of but um there were there were these these models were present for a lot of the film and so they sort of had to give them something to do and it was either um boarding or disembarking a ship or oh no but i thought there was a bit where they were they were legitimately at like an event maybe i should try and yeah i mean you're probably right tim it was difficult to take in the whole movie because it is so haphazard you do naturally drift in and out yeah and also like it's how did you find the experience of watching this um not physically together because um it makes it a lot sadder for one yeah like i'm just i'm just sitting here by myself in my studio watching a softcore french porn i know i knew it was coming all morning and so i mean i agree but i i made a real effort to be like i'm going to let the day be nothing and then spiral into me watching softcore French pornography alone.

And so I had a pretty great morning. And I think within that context, I found it, you know, just like a weird day at the office, just punching in. I knew what was on the cards. That's the problem with doing this on Zoom. It does, it sort of does have a bit of a work aspect to it.

Just the fact that we're doing this on the application Zoom. Yeah. Maybe I made that shit. I'm just scrolling through the movie. I guess I did make that shit up about the fashion event. Maybe is that the start? No, it's not. I think I made that up. But there's quite frequent mentions. Oh, no, here it is that the start no it's not i i think i made that up but there's like quite

frequent mentions oh no here it is i fucking found it it's yeah they definitely are the so i'm looking at a bit right now with their backstage they're doing their makeup they're doing their hair there's lots of mirrors with those um light bulbs around that you do your like makeup on and it's cross-cutting to emmanuel with her eyes closed so she's like obviously remembering this. This is one of the flashbacks at the 20-minute mark that is being elicited by Professor Simon. Can I ask you, what are the connections you draw between the Emmanuel of the first four films?

Can you tell me about Emmanuel's journey across the six films we've seen so far, trying to create some sort of overarching narrative or sense of character from what we've seen, the body of evidence we've seen so far trying to create some sort of overarching narrative or sense of character from what we've seen the body of evidence we've seen well what a great um moment to point out the fact that we haven't watched one of them yeah right like we've uh so at time of recording and this probably won't be reflected in the releases but we haven't watched four yeah is that right um so that's that's that's the next uh the next hill to climb because it was just a little bit hard to find so i couldn't find it in time so we continued on what is the story of emmanuel well it's about

a woman who discovers her own eroticism, I guess. You know, her own enjoyment of life through sex. But then a lot of stuff happens to her and she meets guys who, like, crash planes and have boats. A lot of transportation. She's a fan of transportation and fucking. That's what you're saying.

I feel like you're right and that the first few movies were very much concentrated on someone trying to find their own sexuality and like a sexual openness and then by the time we've got to emmanuel six it's like they've taken away all of that work and they're like and now this person has amnesia like it's there's no there's a there's a lack of connective tissue. It's just got the same name. We are in brave, uncharted new waters for the franchise. There was at least, I guess, in that we haven't seen far, there was at least a continuity of the same actor playing Emmanuel

in the first three, the great Sylvia Christel. But now I feel like, and again, you know, for the franchise, it's a bit upsetting, but for us, it's quite exciting. I feel like we're going to watch some slightly more disconnected and aimless films. Yeah. This one as well, like, sorry, this is a little bit unrelated to what you're saying,

but the duration was an hour 15 on what we hit. But you were telling me just before we got um on the record that apparently there's like a a longer cut yeah so it was the normal release this is what we watched is the the widely distributed international release but from my limited research there was a a more hardcore hour and 30 minute version and three very erotic scenes have been removed from what we saw what do you know about these scenes?

do we get some penny? we might get some penny it's not specified in the articles that I've got up in front of me but the words hardcore are used and that traditionally as I understand it, hardcore represents the portrayal of actual sex instead of just the illusion of sex,

the illusion to sex happening. Guy, can I read a quote? Well, it's not posited as a quote. It's posited as fact it's just under the review section of the wikipedia page for emmanuel six for the lexicon of international film emmanuel six was a miserably mounted soft that spread yawning boredom and that's all it says great to disagree i guess if you watched it in 1988 and you were invested in the franchise like this would be like if you were really into star wars say and then the sixth star wars film

was like same character luke skywalker but instead of him doing anything or having a problem he's just got amnesia for a whole movie like I can understand the response to people who are invested in the franchise, but as someone watching it in 2020, it is an exciting departure from the staid and rehashed story of a woman discovering her sexuality into a woman battling with amnesia and an excitable, bald host. I cannot tell you how it's a combination of i know this isn't going to happen but i just desperately want it to happen i want professor simon to stay on the

emmanuel boat with us so badly i i want to track this woman and this man who is like uh i mean i think this is the second time i'm bringing up a buffy the vampire slayer reference on this series but he's he's essentially giles he's got a sort of guardianship role um for emmanuel and her i wouldn't say her emotional well-being i don't i think that's uh probably a stretch for some reason he's incredibly invested in reawakening her like sexual component of her personality emmanuel's reputation proceeds across the globe every room she walks into people say that's emmanuel and they know who she is and so it's for the greater good his investment is not selfish it's for the knowledge that through emmanuel we will explore you know the the most

exciting sexual frontiers available in the softcore pornography genre and if he doesn't jolt her out of this amnesia who the fuck will emmanuel is very beautiful but i am sick to death of being told that fact like the refrain that you keep talking about that that musical um original composition that keeps coming back it's got lyrics and it just keeps telling you that Emmanuel is beautiful, Emmanuel is sexy, Emmanuel is desirable. It's like, I fucking get it.

You name the movie after it. You name the franchise after it. You're not Serge Gainsbourg. We don't need to hear it from you. We've already heard it as best you can a couple of fucking movies ago. They've got to get the rights. They've got to put that through everything.

All Emmanuel should open and close with search search games we're going emmanuel emmanuel emmanuel emmanuel he's not even telling you goodbye yeah about emmanuel he's just saying her name and being like you do the rest you might like it you might not but this is who she is music's supposed to be artistic it's not supposed to be pure exposition because the script didn't do a good enough job but um that said i did enjoy the music nonetheless which is important to me i enjoyed the music i enjoyed the movie i'm just hoping next time we watch one of these we can be sitting side saddle yeah patrolling boners irl i'm gonna give this movie i'm gonna give this movie a four out of seven i'm gonna give this movie one turgid penis out of how many one but the sliding scale is flaccid to heart. Oh, boy. Okay.

Seems pretty explicit and on theme. So with that, that's Emmanuel 6, a film that exists with two directors, much like From Dusk Till Dawn, except I think that one has three maybe, a movie we did not watch. If you don't already and you would like to support us, you can do so on patreon.com slash T-W-I-O-A-T.

And if you do that, then you get access to some bonus content, not least of which is our new weekly series, Killionaire, which we're not really going to talk about on the free stream for fear of Jeff Bezos figuring out what's going on and shutting us down we've also got a discord now if you're giving more than two dollars a month uh oh there's an exclusive channel but there's also just a general free channel um for everyone to join in so the link to that is in the show notes guy what's your favorite food pasta see you everybody Guy, what's your favourite food? Pasta.

See you, everybody.