The Worst Idea Of All Time - 13: Pokémon

Episode Date: March 22, 2023

It’s the fourth watch of F8 and it’s not feelin’ great. Tim and Guy ride their lazy boys into the mines once more to discover new secrets about a guy prominently in this movie who DOES NOT READ ...AS AN ACTOR, the history of energy drinks in Aotearoa New Zealand and answer the biggest question in all of the Fast and Furious franchise; Which Pokémon are each of the crew? Strap in, grab a 440ml Monster and enjoy.Join us on SubstackSee Guy live in Australia and New ZealandSee Tim live in Australia and New Zealand Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
Starting point is 00:00:16 This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Hello everybody and welcome to a podcast called The Worst Idea of All Time. My name is Tim Batt. Yeah man. And we have just watched... His name's Guy Montgomery.
Starting point is 00:00:41 Fate of the Furious. The 8th Fast and and the furious movie for the fourth time he is tim bann i am guy montgomery confirm it and this feels bad does it yes this was it was interesting because early on in the watch guy today you said um what were the exact words you used you were like i like this i feel bad watching the movie. I remember this feeling. I remember this feeling. It brought you back. You had some nostalgia.
Starting point is 00:01:12 Yeah, and I don't know where to place it and sort of check it past whether or not it's nostalgia for as recently as the depths of our F9 watches or if it's a broader nostalgia for the experience of watching and struggling to engage with a movie and you know what's fun about the fast and furious series if you shorten each one to like f8 f9 it sounds like you're saying fuck eight yeah fuck the number nine and i've you know it's a long way down from the mountaintop because i remember singing this movie's praises i remember as recently as last week with joseph moore still kind of enjoying it i actually wonder if joseph
Starting point is 00:01:48 moore's poisoned me yes i think he did because you no longer like the rock i enjoyed the opening sequence as ever the car race in cuba but there's something about the rock delivering that inspirational speech to the red dragons that really irked me this is the girls soccer team for those who haven't seen the flick and uh it was just it was just it was downhill from there and it was but imagine if in this movie luke hobbs's job was to talk to a bunch of real dragons and get them to help the crew so there's cars and there's nukes and there's cypher and there's dragons i can't i i'm having so much trouble today i can't engage with the thought because the problem with this movie isn't we
Starting point is 00:02:32 need to introduce more nonsense like the whole time i was watching it i was having a really hard time and i felt like you were in cahoots with the movie. I felt like you teamed up with the movie to make me the enemy and to make me a problem. Which I think you can acknowledge was not what was happening. Why do you think I can acknowledge that? On what planet? I don't know. You said sort of words to the effect.
Starting point is 00:03:00 Because you told me that when the movie was playing. You said, I feel teamed up on by you and the movie. And, and, and, and I said, Hey, listen,
Starting point is 00:03:09 man, that's not my problem. That's something you need to sort out. And I feel sorry that you feel that way. I feel bad for you, but that's something you need to figure out. You, I don't know what it is.
Starting point is 00:03:21 You were, you seem to be more comfortable, safer. You're enjoying yourself more. I'm not above admitting I was jealous of you. I wasn't being a dick to you, though. You have to say that. I wasn't this time. I often, I so often am.
Starting point is 00:03:38 And I don't think today I was. You weren't being a dick to me, and I didn't ask for it explicitly, but what I needed was a helping hand it's almost like it's like a i think this season in particular there's been a relationship where um it's like uh in some ways i'm a little bit your older brother who's just fucking like if i see you walk into a room i'll just punch you as hard as i can in the arm and this is the first day i haven't done it and you're like this sucks i feel weird i hate this what's happening everyone's plotting against me because something's changed but but realistically you just fucking hated the movie didn't you i've always thought of us more
Starting point is 00:04:15 as twins i know yeah and fair enough it's for some reason i think that dynamic has been happening recently though me punching you in the arm i mean metaphorically what what is what i'm drawn to and what was interesting to me today is the psychological element of the watch and the journey and where is it like we are exposed to the um inner monologue and the innermost thought like the the removal of any sort of filter we will sing to ourselves yes and talk to ourselves and behave with ourselves when we're around each other as though no one else is in the room correct and it is a rare level a rare and unusual level of comfortability like there's just so much nonsense flying around yeah and i just i'm in a really weird space today where i'm just i really i'm feeling like um i don't feel self-conscious
Starting point is 00:05:06 but i feel exposed i feel vulnerable and i feel cross i didn't join you in your negativity and you feel like slighted by that perhaps i don't feel slighted i think it's a guilt thing i think you know i i admire the positive outlook i admire the engagement with the movie as a movie. And perhaps I feel poorly that I didn't, I just didn't come at it from the top of my intelligence, perhaps. I just, I was on a big journey. I've been on a big, I've been sitting in this fucking chair for two hours and 15 minutes and I've been on a big journey.
Starting point is 00:05:41 Hey, let's not take it out on the chairs, man. These are nice chairs. I love the chairs. Well, actually, let me rephrase that these aren't nice chairs but they're comfy chairs nah they're nice this is like this is deluxe i hope this was listed on the furniture website or floor as a podcasting suite it wasn't so i don't know if we've mentioned it in passing but we haven't talked about it very much But I bought a two seater Recliner and Like a lazy boy sort of equivalent Just so Guy and I can have a little bit
Starting point is 00:06:12 Of comfort in here while we watch the movie There's a projector now So we've got a little projector screen and these lazy boys And that's how we consume the content It's nice And it feels, it's like It's harder To it feels It's like It's harder To complain
Starting point is 00:06:26 In earnest Without guilt I won't say that it's harder to complain Because it's very easy to complain About having to watch these movies multiple times But it does add a layer of guilt When you're watching on a projector With a recliner under you
Starting point is 00:06:40 Do you know what it is? Do you know the only way to get over a recliner? Get under another one Go on You don't see a lot of people lying face first on a recliner Like a massage table Yeah, I don't think I've ever seen someone try it out Me neither
Starting point is 00:07:01 The grooves and the mechanics of the body don't really work i feel like you're not simpatico to lie front on i was gonna say you'd suffocate but i guess you can turn your head to the side can't you there's something about your turn of phrase about getting under a recliner made me think about fucking a recliner from the top and it just doesn't work no i don't think so the the pelvis the hips would always be too far from... I'm imagining that you have sex with the middle back of the chair. The middle back, okay. So kind of where your lumbar is, the lumbar support bit. And I think if you're lying on it from front on,
Starting point is 00:07:35 that's a difficult access point. Yeah, it is. What I wanted to say is I think Joseph Moore has... I loved having him on, but I think he's had a negative impact. He's beguiling. He's, I crave Fast 7. I crave what was promised in it. He's told me what is,
Starting point is 00:07:57 he's told me this movie's not canon. He's told me why he doesn't like The Rock. Oh, he's saying in his opinion. I want to make that clear. And like in his, you know, he's a big fan of Fast and Furious and this one's so bad that he doesn't like the rock oh he's saying in his opinion i want to make that clear and like in his and his you know he's a big fan of fast and furious and this one's so bad that he doesn't it's not canon in his head and can you tell me about like describe a little bit about your heavy desire to see paul walker like did you write him as an actor have you got fond memories
Starting point is 00:08:20 of him or is it just this something new it's unlocked a level of respect for the franchise it's not that i disrespected it but um i just genuinely thought he i just i misremembered it completely i thought he died a much longer time ago than evidently he did i thought he died after the second fast and the furious and so I was imagining that Fast 3 through 7 had no Paul Walker. Right. And so I thought that Vin Diesel had been dragging this franchise around,
Starting point is 00:08:56 nestled between his clenched fists and his giant biceps for however many movies. Yeah, right. For, what's that? Seven movies. I didn't realize he had like the other because it's it's the two of their franchise it's not just fin diesels yeah and i just i didn't have that information and so the idea that like this other vital part of the core dna of what we're
Starting point is 00:09:21 doing and what we're watching is just around the corner um is is so exciting to me because he's like brian and dom it's not it's it's the two of them that's my understanding so i just think it's so exciting and it makes it harder to wait you want to see this maybe there's some impatience creeping in this buddy peering and uh as quickly as possible yeah post haste i mean paul walker post i feel like i i feel like a bad friend i've been talking about myself my own experience this whole time how was all that for you oh look it was fine you you just you you punched in i was trying i was at work yeah i was at work but you went into the office and you're like you know what this is my life this is what i signed up for i'm going to work i went into work today and i said i fucking hate this job i think your place is more
Starting point is 00:10:15 admirable it's it's it's noble to not accept what's going on. In fact, there's lots of great songs about it in Matilda the musical. That's the whole theme of that show is if something ain't right, you got to put it right because if you just let it go, then that's wrong. What do you suggest, in the spirit of Matilda the musical, what do you suggest I do? Okay, this is quite tricky i'm trying to tie the circumstances of matilda in with our predicament and find what
Starting point is 00:10:57 the through line would be i guess the movie is our parents because we have to live with it, right? It's a little bit outside of our control, but they are more or less harmful to us. And they're abusing us. So what we need to do is find ways to play tricks on the movies. And I think we did that a little bit today. We felt a little bit entitled on this our fourth watch of the flick to to go back to something we've done before do a little of our own soundtracking we didn't take the piss we just picked one song each i kicked it off i
Starting point is 00:11:38 wanted to surprise guy was a bit of mr mistoffele Yeah, out of the blue when they arrive in Russia. Catch the musical, the movie version, put it on out of nowhere, started with the chorus, I queued it up. I really love, there's a moment in the Mr. Mistoffelees I love when it's like later on, it's, you know, there's sort of, they're repeating the chorus,
Starting point is 00:12:01 but there's vocal and, you know, harmonic variations. And he's talking about how great it is. And he says, Oh, I never was ever so glad with magical Mr. Mistoffelees. And I can't remember the name. The female protagonist, the dancer who can kind of sing in the movie. The lead.
Starting point is 00:12:22 She goes, As you. And he goes how's me and there's like it's just it's the little back and forth of the as you as me yeah they're you know they're on key but somewhere else from where the rest of the song's been and it's a little back and forth it's a moment between them and i heard it and i felt like a genuine jolt of positive energy that's so nice and i was like i and it made me think about my relationship to music and i was like it's such a weirdly specific moment it's almost a nothing moment really in the context of the song and the music that's what music is man it's these little
Starting point is 00:12:55 phrases it's these it's these little key changes me to my core and i heard that and that that was probably like two to three minutes worth like of you know of um respite of juice exactly and then you put on chemical brothers let forever be that's the name of the track which um was awesome it was really awesome it's yeah it highlighted a few things it highlighted the abstract nature of the action sequence if you remove in russia if you remove the context of whatever they think is happening in the story it's a lot of fast cutting there's just sort of there's dials there's lights there's buttons there's screens there's explosions there's a lot of people pushing different buttons um and it totally serves as a music video where you're
Starting point is 00:13:41 just like okay imagery cool and then it finished And then it finished. And then you observe, quite rightly, I think. Because you've been known to listen. You'll listen to a movie score, right? Sure. You walk around listening to Trent Reznor's Social Network, do you? Oh, yeah, man. That's a good one. I put that on for board games just to really heighten.
Starting point is 00:13:56 Do you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. People hate that when I do that. That's high intensity. I don't like Risk. Yeah. Like a game of Risk. We don't really play board games together
Starting point is 00:14:06 No Is that a missed opportunity? Absolutely I think so Yeah I don't play board games with anyone at the moment Yeah And I really want to
Starting point is 00:14:15 I was trying to get You're trying to get Azul going when I was at your house recently Yeah I don't know how that game works It wasn't to be Basically you're a tiler, and you're invited to the palace of a Portuguese king. Really?
Starting point is 00:14:30 You and several other tilers, yeah, and you've all got, you all sort of basically tile the walls, and whoever, that's the sort of story of the game. Sure. The basic premise is you're making patterns and accruing points.
Starting point is 00:14:41 That's kind of cool. I like the sound of that. There's a nice attack and defense element to it, know so my shining light for this watch of the fate of the furious was uh i wrote it down because i knew i'd forget it and i did it's quite it's quite close to the end but it's um do you know can i tell you my internal point scoring system for um shining light yeah start of the movie you want more points for the start of the movie and i'm breaking it into beginning middle end yes the shining light from the start of the movie is worth one yeah so it's like doing your homework
Starting point is 00:15:16 immediately yeah you're like oh yeah that i like that i remember that yes there's a shining light shine of the light towards the shining light was the end of the movie is worth two points because it might be that it's genuinely your shining light, but often it might be like, fuck, I haven't actually enjoyed anything here. Yeah, why is that worth two though? Doesn't that make it worse? No, because I feel like doing it at the start means that you can totally unplug from enjoying any part of the movie.
Starting point is 00:15:39 So at the end, you have to continue to engage. You have to re-engage. You're picking out something. Yeah, you're right. But it's not a case where it's like the whole movie. I'm going, okay, what's my shining light? What's my shining light? It's the case of we're 25 minutes from the end.
Starting point is 00:15:52 We're in Russia. And I'm like, I don't know what I enjoyed in this movie today. And now I've got to pick something. That shouldn't be worth two points, I think. I think it's worth more. You are being forced to engage again or for longer or differently but the three point
Starting point is 00:16:08 do you think so do you think it should go end of the movie one point start of the movie two points I kind of do
Starting point is 00:16:13 I kind of do because if something comes that early in the film and it really grabs you enough to be like whoa loved it that's my shining light
Starting point is 00:16:22 that's real whereas if it happens towards the end it's like I'm scrambling. I've got to find something. Does that make sense? It does make sense. I think there's arguments to be made both ways.
Starting point is 00:16:31 Totally. I think we can respectfully disagree. But obviously, middle of the movie, you're there. You're actually engaged the whole way through. Hats off to you. That's worth three points. I just remembered another note that I wrote down, which you're going to love,
Starting point is 00:16:43 which I'm going to bring up, which I think you've forgotten that I said, after my shining light. My shining light, Hobbes to Roman. So this is The Rock to, what's his name again? The guy who plays Roman? Tyrese.
Starting point is 00:16:57 Tyrese. Who I understand, and I think I've mentioned it in passing before, it wasn't just The Rock and Vin Diesel who had beef. Tyrese and The Rock had beef. Really? Yeah. Have you looked that up?
Starting point is 00:17:10 Yeah, I've picked that up. That's some sort of... Some pop culture knowledge going on. Miscellanea. Because they actually do share quite a few scenes together. And I would wager that there was more screen time that those two dudes shared that's been cut, it seems to me. It seems like they tried to make them a pairing and it didn't quite work.
Starting point is 00:17:32 See, this is the interesting thing. Now that Joseph's planted the seed, where you're like, how's The Rock pissed off? He's got this flawless reputation as being this incredibly, like, everyone loves The Rock guy. Hyper charismatic. But then how has he pissed off so many people just in this one franchise? Well, he is legitimately bigger than the franchise. That is threatening. When you come into the franchise, you fall in line.
Starting point is 00:17:59 So it's basically Vin. I presume it was Vin and Paul. And then there's a little gap. And then there's the crew. I mean, like, Letty, arguably. But then there's the Vin. I presume it was Vin and Paul. And then there's a little gap. And then there's the crew. I mean, like Letty, arguably. But then there's the crew. Yeah. And The Rock.
Starting point is 00:18:10 He superseded the crew. He has to be part of the crew. But he's not. You can't pretend like Dwayne Johnson is just another member of the crew, can you? Yeah. Even Statham is like a special member of the crew. But he still can be part of it. He can operate within the crew.
Starting point is 00:18:25 So, I mean, this is another thing Joseph Moore's Poison did to me is watching Statham today, I was like, what unspeakable things did this man do in Fast 7-Man? Oh, the character, yeah. And why do I have to wait four movies, four screenings to find out?
Starting point is 00:18:36 That's how this works. So, The Shining Light was Hobbes, The Rock, yelling to Roman, why are you always yelling? When they're in Russia, they're sharing a vehicle, they're running through the ice and roman says uh i can't even remember what it's in response to roman's like get us out of here or something like that and hobbs just goes why are you always yelling and it's funny because it's like during a tense moment where yelling would
Starting point is 00:19:00 be called for but it's also like a funny point yeah it's it's good bit of comedy i think it works and i think the rock pulls it off he does so i spit in the face of you joseph moore it's he still hits some good lines a lot of them felt like they're written by um like a lot of the gag lines where he or the pony up lines where he's either sort of offering comedic but genuine inspiration yeah he's threatening Jason Statham. I feel like they're written on spec. It feels like there was like a hundred lines were submitted and they were pulled out at random and he just delivered them. Real, you know, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2.
Starting point is 00:19:41 Yeah. Kevin James staring down Neil McDonaghough vibes where they're going you know no i'll bring it i'll bring it yeah i'll bring a pumpkin a guitar to a pumpkin fight that's how crazy that is one of them well done good memory i'll bring a folk guitar to a pumpkin fight oh so it's there's guitars and there's a pumpkin fight or there's a fight there's a pumpkin there's a guitar there's a fight they walk into a bar anyway if we didn't do this podcast would we be closer friends
Starting point is 00:20:08 than we are hard to say but quite very possible I would hope so but in some I don't know it's like
Starting point is 00:20:17 things absorb time don't they and this is the thing where timeship has to happen friendship timeship
Starting point is 00:20:24 friendship is time accrued. Interesting. Have you graphed it though? Yes. Imagine that there's the graph of our actual friendship in real time that has existed since we started podcasting together. There's a peak in there.
Starting point is 00:20:43 It's the height of the friendship okay i'm not saying that we're not close friends but i'm saying like if you look at the trajectory it's like there was the the rate of acceleration is greater than what it might have been if we never podcasted together the rate of acceleration is great so the the closeness of friendship is climbing faster than it would if we didn't podcast together and just remain social friends okay do you agree with that i think so i think and so what i'm interested in is where this projected graph of friendship if we never started podcasting together where do the lines meet and what is their movement after the intersection so you were saying there is a point where our uh our our friendship through podcasting hits a bit of a plateau
Starting point is 00:21:26 how long does just natural friendship take to get to that plateau yes and then like yeah and then that that plateau is the variable movement is the variable i don't think it's it i don't think it's a time question i think time's the wrong variable what is it then i don't i don't know i don't know exactly well it's a kind of time but it's not it's like time hanging out rather than time has passed because the podcast is like we have to hang out every week basically when it's going but the challenge is that we're not always going to be in the mood to hang out yeah but we have to yeah it's like a marriage that way. I think in a lot of podcasts, that subtext is just unacknowledged and unspoken. Yes.
Starting point is 00:22:08 And in our podcast, that is basically the essence of the podcast. It's true. It's very explicit. Yeah. Because even in one of these fucking knee slapping, happy-go-lucky, jolly podcasts,
Starting point is 00:22:19 where they just come together and talk about nothing with their friends. Put episodes out. Put them down. Yeah. Well, it's not fucking actual work, is it? What's at stake? What are you doing? Where's the value? What are you adding?
Starting point is 00:22:32 Okay? What have you sacrificed to bring your art to bear? Nothing. You're hanging out with your friends. That sounds good. You're goofing off. Yeah. Stop goofing off.
Starting point is 00:22:43 What are we doing? We're at work. We're at work,'re at work brother we're creating art we're creating art by looking at other people's attempt to create art and going i don't know about that art my um thing that i wanted to throw at you this is real divergence in tone we've got to figure out which Pokemon each crew member are. That is a fun game. Because at the start I was, for some reason, we're in Cuba, and I said, what Pokemon do you think Letty is?
Starting point is 00:23:13 No, it was before that. I said that I described Dom as Geodude. Oh, sorry, that's right. I said I have no desire to see Vin Diesel fuck. And then I said, it'd be like Watching And you said Geodude He's just got
Starting point is 00:23:30 Who does Geodude Evolve to Gollum Is it And there's a middle one Oh Gravel is the ultimate one So Geodude Geomite or something
Starting point is 00:23:38 No Wait No Geodude Gravel is the ultimate one What did I say again I think Geodude Might only go through one evolution. Oh, yeah, maybe you're right.
Starting point is 00:23:47 I think he does. Geomite's made up. He's just got Geodude energy. Oh, yeah, clenched fists. Similar eyes and facial structure. And he's got real, rock is the word. He's got like dry. Yeah, ironically, the rock isn't Geodude.
Starting point is 00:24:04 Vin Diesel is. Yeah, the rock isn't Geodude. Vin Diesel is. Yeah. The rock is Nidoking. No. Marchamp. Yeah. I mean, yeah. You know what?
Starting point is 00:24:18 You're right. Nidoking's too thick through the middle. The rock tapers. But also Nidoking like literally is a bit regal and i don't i don't and also i'm thinking visually the rock tape is off to the bottom like a superman triangle like it's just not possible for him to be that thick all the way down literally marchamp is like based off a dude like the rock yeah like that's what it is and it makes a lot of sense the rock is marchamp I floated when we watched that Leti was perhaps Jinx.
Starting point is 00:24:48 And then I started analyzing it. And the more I think about it, the more I think Jinx is like, it seems like a really racist Pokemon. Seems like it's based on a trope of like maybe like Haitian or Jamaican, like Caribbean sort of woman. And it's almost kind of uh this even feels like a weird word to say out loud in this day and age but like a gollywog sort of depiction yeah I mean certainly jinx um the longer you look at a picture of jinx the more you know
Starting point is 00:25:20 the origins of jinx are forced upon your your conscious and even like because jinx it's you know the sort of old uh senses of uh i'm not using quite the right words but like magic and witchcraft and those sorts of things that are associated with uh with certain practices in the caribbean you know it's like that's where that pokemon comes from yeah not great but hey i guess it was made up in the very early 90s so i mean i slightly different time i know japanese are crazy i can't i can resist i can't play slitty in the pokemon in the pokedex oh but you must this is the game i assume we're going original 150 it It's all we're familiar with. Guy and I are old men, and we only acknowledge.
Starting point is 00:26:08 We're like separatists or something from the south. We only acknowledge 151 Pokemon. The other ones aren't real. What was the... You can evolve Eevee with three different stones. Electron, Voltron. Oh, wait. Voltron?
Starting point is 00:26:27 No, fuck. What is it? Electron? There's a water... Oh, Voltron. Vaporeon. Vaporeon. Flareon.
Starting point is 00:26:34 And the electric one. It's the thunder one. Yeah, the electric one. That's what I think Letty is. Yeah, I'll give you that. I don't know where it's coming from. I actually think... What's the non-nine...
Starting point is 00:26:44 Vulpex? Is that the name of... Yeah, Vulpex. Vulpex? It's the band. Yeah, I'll give you that. I don't know where it's coming from. I actually think, what's the non-Ninetales? Vulpex? Is that the name of? Yeah, Vulpec. Vulpec? It's the band. Yeah, true. So I don't know. What's not pre-Ninetales?
Starting point is 00:26:52 What's the unevolved version of Ninetales? I think it's Vulpec. It's something like that. Yeah. I reckon that's kind of lady. Okay. You know? She's got pretty fox energy.
Starting point is 00:27:03 Yeah. Not pretty as in very. Pretty as in good-looking fox energy to me. I feel like she's evolved. Maybe Ninetales is better. I feel Neda's got a lot of power. Yeah, you're right. Probably Ninetales.
Starting point is 00:27:18 I mean, the fun ones, I guess, hypothetically, are Roman and Tish. What have you got? It's hard, isn't it? It's hard because there's not a lot of like funny Pokemon that I can think of. Meowth. Oh, there we go. That's pretty good. That's Tej.
Starting point is 00:27:41 No, that's Tej. Roman's too big to be Meowth. Tej is too intelligent to be Meow meowth was so smart meowth was the only pokemon that taught itself english okay yeah okay like that was the story that was the story like there was this devastating story oh my god i know who dom is fucking cubone because the story of cubone is that it's very sad yeah yeah it's mother died and i think it's wearing its skull as a hand yeah it's so fucked up all the pokemon like this is mr mime it's a goofy clown pokemon that like i'm sorry what fucking hell so that's that's dom teredo um yeah i think me out is it it's good yeah i okay well we'll agree to disagree
Starting point is 00:28:38 on which one's which but me out is so good for for either or Tej. But I think Tej, right? Bearing in mind that Meowth learned how to speak English. Which means Roman is... It's tricky. I want to say Ekans. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:04 I feel like... I mean, the smooth head is a big part of it for me. Oh, true. Maybe, yeah. Yeah, maybe that's it. Not Cobra with a K? Nah, because Cobra's fucking lit ass. And I don't think Roman's there.
Starting point is 00:29:20 He might actually be there when we go back to some prior movies, but I feel like they kind of goofed him up. Seifer is Missingo. Oh, wow. I didn't know you knew about missing go that's a good pull anyone who played on the game boy knows about what but you had to like google and shit yeah you had to go off and down the coast and you get infinity did you actually get it you don't catch it you go down you go down to the island and you swim up and down the coast and a wild missing go appears and if you catch it you go down you go down to the island and you swim up and down the coast and a wild massingo appears and if you catch it goes a glitch yeah and it's like the third thing in your um like index of items yeah is duplicated to 99 oh so if you had a rare candy or a fucking
Starting point is 00:29:59 ultimate but what a master ball you could duplicate it and then but it's sort of it's a it's a it kind of breaks the game because then it's like you become invincible yeah but like yeah you'd you'd because you know you'd fucking juice up your pokemon then you could go and take on you know lance in the elite four that's a fucking great call man that's a great call yeah because she is she has superpowers or she could be mu because they do have similar hair the dreads are kind of similar to Mew's little thingies we've got Ramsey and then I think we're out Ramsey's a tough one because like I don't think there's any hacker Pokemon in the first 151 I assume there's probably some afterwards but it wasn't as much of a thing back then so I don't know You got anything for that? Really I'm trying to I would almost say Mew
Starting point is 00:30:47 If Mew was like less powerful You know I mean Ramsey Yeah this might be where the wheels fall off a little bit No we can do it In my head I'm running through I'm thinking about
Starting point is 00:31:01 Pharaoh What's Pharaoh? Oh the fucking sphero's grown up one i'm thinking about butterfree yeah i'm thinking about what did weevil go into there was butterfree oh uh b that's not that no no that was it's an evil henchman sort of stuff yeah yeah but like butterfree was like good i reckon butterfree's a great shout yeah a lot of kind of pseudo magical powers and stuff and quite feminine and uh okay yeah we'll take it that's really good can we get one for stath do you reckon sure sure i mean oh it's so weird because i am coming up with Mr. Mime for him.
Starting point is 00:31:45 It's not a direct hit. I was too. Yeah. Okay. There you go. Mr. Mime. So let's review. Cubone, Dom Toretto.
Starting point is 00:31:54 Yeah. Missingo is Cypher. For The Rock, we have Machamp. Yep. For Tej, we have Meowth. Yep. For Roman. Ekans. Did we settle Machamp. Yep. For Tej, we have Meowth. Yep. For Roman. Ekans?
Starting point is 00:32:08 Ekans. Did we settle on that? Yep. For Letty. Oh, Nine Tails. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Nine Tails.
Starting point is 00:32:18 Ramsey. It's Butterfree. And Shaw is Mr. Mime. And there you go. Beautiful. For everyone who was asking, you can stop messaging us. Have we got a shining light from you yet, brother? Nice to engage with you as a friend.
Starting point is 00:32:39 Shining light. The shining light. Shining light. The shining light. Speaking of which, all light has left your eyes right now. You were lit up when we were hunting for Pokemon, and look at you now. It's not an ad, but it's not not an ad.
Starting point is 00:33:01 When the hackers are taking over all of the cars in Manhattan, we go to a Jeep store, and there's one on the floor that I'm not that interested in but then we see an external shot you know how in car shops they often got the cars canted on an angle and like in a jeep shop because they're outdoors they're canted on rocks or something absolutely i know what you mean there's a jeep grand cherokee we see an external it's red we see an external shot we see inside of the car we see that we see it turn on we see the engine turn we see it go care see inside of the car. We see it turn on. We see the engine turn on. We see it go careening out of the car window.
Starting point is 00:33:27 Yeah. And every time I see that, I think, you know, I don't really like Jeep. That's a good presentation. I don't really have an opinion on cars, but I just sit and I'm like, that does, I want to at least test drive one of those. Yeah, nice. And that feeling, the movie making me feel a genuine desire or having a, you know having some sort of curious or positive response towards something instead of just resigned frustration. Yes.
Starting point is 00:33:51 That's my shining light. Wow. Well done, movie. And potentially well done whoever teed up the product placement. I don't know if money changed hands for that, but I hope it did. I think you see a Prius. You see maybe a couple of Toyotas. I would actually be fascinated to see the relationship between cars like the car makers the
Starting point is 00:34:09 labels and the movies yeah whether or not there are financial ties because everything does kind of get a look in it does feel when the cars are being overridden by the hackers that a lot of them american we see chevrolet yeah um the first one we see is a i don't know if chevrolet and chrysler are the same thing but you know like when they're when when all of the crew are fitted out in their different cars to chase dom through manhattan uh training wheels you know little nobody eastwood he's in a toyota right and you've got roman and a Bentley. I don't really, I can't place everyone else's cars. The Rock's in a Jeep, isn't he? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:49 And they pick all their cars? It does feel American. Oh, maybe it's a Land Rover, actually. What nationality is Land Rover? They look, no, Jason Statham looks fondly of the Land Rover, which is British. It is. And the Rock drives the Jeep.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Okay, gotcha. Guy's been paying attention, everybody. Probably where all my problems started. There's a guy in the movie that we've talked about a lot when the movie's been going but i don't think we've brought him up on the pod yet um and he's notable because he's a really in my opinion bad actor cypher's lackey cypher's lackey he's just it's so crazy because everyone else it kind of it's one of those moments where it showcases that even if you think people are doing a bad job at acting they are actors and you get reminded of that fact when you see someone pop up who it's like oh man i don't think that guy's an actor
Starting point is 00:35:36 and he gets multiple lines he's he's a right hand man for the 45 minutes there in russia basically charlie shoots out her scene in a control room nearly everything she does is like it's all interiors it's so tidy from a shooting point of view
Starting point is 00:35:52 what's the yeah what's the walk from the airplane like what's what's the walk that Charlize has to make
Starting point is 00:35:59 on set the literal walk from the control room like I guess it's all just one set I don't even think there's a walk I reckon it's like 20 meters between the control room um like i guess it's all just one set i don't even think there's a walk i reckon it's like 20 meters between the control room she's in in russia and the you know it's a fucking sound stage right she probably goes to make up and they redo the same room for her to walk back into fuck yeah anyway he's a one guy when they're remotely
Starting point is 00:36:21 trying to control the submarine and take care of the family in Russia for the last 45 minutes of the movie. And he just looks like every cunt you've seen in an American coffee shop. Absolutely. He's some fucking brunette, bearded guy. He just looks like a fucking guy. And it's like, why is this guy here?
Starting point is 00:36:40 He acts like one. This is just a dude that you found and you thought you'd put him in the movie and all the scenes with Charlize Theron. And they would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for us meddling kids because we know this motherfucker isn't an actor. Absolutely. He's a guy.
Starting point is 00:36:57 And I feel bad if he's listening because it's not completely outside the realm of possibility. But we got to shoot it straight here. I will not be silenced. The truth must come out. This is just a fucking guy that they put in the film. I don't know if he won a competition a la Charlie and the Chocolate Factory to be in a Fast and Furious movie,
Starting point is 00:37:19 but that is the level. I reckon you'd have to remove like a... You'd have to remove... you'd have to remove like a um you'd have to you have to buy a jeep and there's people buying tens and tens of jeeps i thought it was simple i feel like it's you you you get like a golden uh bolt in a monster energy drink can and it's like well i got the golden bolt it's very high risk because it does fit through the mouthpiece and you could just swallow it if you're guzzling monster energy drink which is the only way to
Starting point is 00:37:51 drink it you don't want that lingering in your mouth with all your taste receptors for any amount of time it's just got to get directly to your pancreas turn it into energy he sits there it's not there for a long time it's there for an energetic time he he's just relaying he's like carrying out orders and relaying i don't care about this guy anymore let's talk about monster energy when's the last time you drank a monster i don't know if i've ever drank a monster energy drink in my i've had rockstar a couple times like as a as a teenager yeah i feel like options were fucking limited in fact i reckon the situation would have been devastatingly hung over age 19 there's no like coca-pepsi because it's probably new year's and i'm in a small town there's a dairy
Starting point is 00:38:41 it's been fucking wiped out in some beautiful coastal town in New Zealand. And all that's left is some ratchet white and gold Rockstar 440 mil. Do you know why your Rockstars and your Monsters are mentally categorized in a different strata from other energy drinks? And this might be unique to New Zealand, but they don't do the small slimline cans. unique to new zealand but they don't do the small slimline cans you are only allowed to drink minimum 440 mils of these drinks at once yeah and that is fucking insane that is literally why in my head i'm like i could have a if i really needed energy in a pinch oh you have a red bull you're right
Starting point is 00:39:20 because red bull is in a little but i would never fucking pick up a can of Monster because I think everything about this is excessive and wrong. This is unnatural. It's very core. Absolutely. But that is the whole vibe of the thing, and the people who love it get it for that reason. Well, you're getting more.
Starting point is 00:39:43 You're getting more poison. Yeah, but it's that more mindset right it's like the value isn't in the quality it's in the it's in the amount absolutely but it does it just reads as is a big dangerous can do we think extreme athletes genuinely drink monster energy drink um first of all absolutely not and second of all do you know who's trying to have it both ways is v which i don't even know if it's in other countries i don't think it is it might be in australia so v energy drink v has got a long and storied history in new zealand because i feel like it was one of the very first ones that we had here and this is way back in the day in the 90s when
Starting point is 00:40:23 they were marketed as smart drinks. Do you remember that? So before they were called energy drinks, it was the exact same formulation. They had like too much sugar, caffeine, and usually guarana in them. That was the big natural selling point. And now they don't really advertise the guarana, but I think it still is in there.
Starting point is 00:40:37 And sometimes, what is it called? Genshin? I'm saying it wrong. I feel like none of these drinks fucking say what's it like. None of the marketing is about the ingredients They used to tell you guarana And now they don't tell you shit Literally none of them They just go it's fucking energy in a can you idiot
Starting point is 00:40:55 What else do you need to know That might be the tagline for V It might be energy in a can But V is green that's it's thing And it comes in a slim can But also periodically About once every two years around Christmas They bring out a 440 can
Starting point is 00:41:10 And they make it look like a fucking grenade Because that is what it's doing to your system And they do Blue V too They do! They fuck around with it Every now and then they'll bring out a Blue V And you're like, okay I don't fuck with either
Starting point is 00:41:23 But I hear V drinkers talking to each other. And people who drink Blue V, it's like they're built different. It's a different strata. It's like the McRib. It's all bad stuff, but because it's seasonal and sometimes it's unavailable, it builds value to the thing. Fuck, man. Do you know what I love about this podcast?
Starting point is 00:41:44 What? I can start a conversation with you in a really bad place and by the end of it i can be like really passionately remembering and sort of reflecting on different energy drinks it's um it is i mean you know i've been in the same comfortable seat the whole time the seats that you generously provide this show with and i've said it before in this episode i've been on a journey i got here at 9 30 this morning right now it's 12 30 and you know where i've been tim i haven't just been in your garage hell i'm back i've been on a fucking journey i'm a traveler i can't see how long we've been talking so i can't see that are we done The perfect amount of time.
Starting point is 00:42:25 Fantastic. Well, I'd like to thank everyone for listening, and I'd like to say to you that you can get all our episodes in video form by supporting us financially on Substack for the princely sum of five US dollars a month. I bet there are some people who would like to know what the chairs look like. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:42 They're probably wondering how. You can see. I've got vision of my garage this episode for you go to twio at twioat.substack.com and you can sign up it's not a huge amount of money by the way and we'd love to have it yeah it makes a difference it's not a huge amount of money, and we'd love to have it. That is a fucking good line. By the way, if you're still only, you're not quite curious enough to hand over that small sum, what if I told you Rufus had been here the whole time?
Starting point is 00:43:16 Oh, yeah, my dog's sitting with me. But also, God, you've been exposed to ads if you're not paying for the premium version, so thanks for bearing with us for that, because we get a little bit of money from that too. So, you know, fucking God bless god bless i say oh man i don't want to it's i've got a real arm's length relationship with the ads there's a couple categories i've said no to and everything else i'm like i don't want to know let us know let us know if you bought anything from an ad podcast the u.s navy they got in there eh there was ads on there we got messages about that yeah we did they were quite a lot people seemed got messages about that yeah we did there were quite a lot people seemed pretty shocked by that collaboration we're at the mercy of whoever
Starting point is 00:43:50 fucking pays money into a big weird machine kept an algorithm okay everyone i hope you are at the end point mood wise of guy's journey and not the start point today i hope that um you thought you might have been at the end of your rope but you found out you journey and not the start point today. I hope that you thought you might have been at the end of your rope but you found out you were just at the start. If you're in New Zealand or Australia please look for Guy and my live shows coming up. We've got a lot of stuff. We've got festivals coming up and we've
Starting point is 00:44:15 got other shows so just go to our website. His one's GuyMontgomery.co.nz and my one's TimBat.co.nz And if you're anywhere else I hope that it's good. May God have mercy on your soul. 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.