The Worst Idea Of All Time - 26: Coke Wins

Episode Date: June 30, 2023

The boiz are on a couch, in a lounge, chatting off the back of a watch of Furious 6. In an expansive discussion about beverages (alcoholic and not), we ask the question; Who could possibly win (out of... ANY ORGANISATION IN THE WORLD) against Coke Cola? Guy’s also trying to figure how why we drink alcohol. Also, why spoons are banned in Russia. Monty is shining a light on the fantastic performance given by a British man who loses his shirt and crucially the pair dig into whether Letty and Dom would still be together if she didn’t get amnesia. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Music Music 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Hello everybody and welcome to the worst idea of all time. I'm just checking that the frames are right on the picture. Hey, Tim, so you know, my name's not everybody. It's Guy. Why can't I hear you very good? Because you've got an attitude problem. Yeah, that could be it. Go again.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Well, how's your attitude now Tim? Yeah it's feeling a little better My attitude's feeling a little better That's good How is your attitude? How's your life? My attitude's good My life's fantastic
Starting point is 00:00:55 Does that make it easy to have a good attitude? There's a cool hat I am cool I don't know how many fucking cool hats I gotta wear Before you realise you're dealing with one of the coolest. Is it like towel material? It's fleece. Okay.
Starting point is 00:01:10 Is it fleece? It's fleece. It's like polyester fleece though. My polyester fleece. So fun. She's my polyester fleece. That song really just went away, didn't it? Who wrote it?
Starting point is 00:01:24 Regurgitator. The Regurgitators. No, just Reg? Who wrote it? Regurgitator. The Regurgitators. No, just Regurgitator. The Regurgitators. Do you know I saw Regurgitator live once? I fucking loved their band. They're an Australian band and they're kind of like, they were like, I would describe them as like dance alt rock.
Starting point is 00:01:39 Name two other songs. Life. Oh, Life. I had like a couple of their albums but it's been a long time shouldn't have left you left you with that i don't mean to step to saw them at the king's arms rip yeah worst worst live act i've ever seen holy they've been off the tools for a while and we're getting back into stuff so that's why you come to New Zealand
Starting point is 00:02:06 to either finish your tour or start your tour they were fucking atrocious they forgot their own songs it was bayard can I say at the other end of the spectrum
Starting point is 00:02:15 I saw Krangbin finish their tour in New Zealand at Auckland and it was a phenomenal show and a remarkable display of musicianship it was technically one of the best music gigs i've been to wow and they played probably a five to ten
Starting point is 00:02:32 minute medley of like multi of genre spanning different songs samples into songs it was a delight and you know we get the worst of it we get the regurgitators at the king's arms figuring out how to hold their tools again but sometimes you also get the jubilation and relief of a hard-working band who've drilled their show yeah until it's as tight as a drum and they come and they say what do you think of this we're going home you ever want to see pink perform live no and i'm sure i've said this before but i remember when i was in year eight for a music project i wrote an essay on pink and the last sentence i wrote in the essay this is in the year 2001 the last sentence was
Starting point is 00:03:17 who knows before september after september after september okay Who knows what the future holds, but right now, everything sure looks rosy in the world of pink. Age? I would have been 12. Wow. It's not bad. It's pretty good. Did you have to write an essay for music on any artist? No, not that I can recall.
Starting point is 00:03:42 I didn't do music in third... Oh, wait, did I? No, I don't think I did music in third form. This is in year eight. First CD you own. Oh, sorry. First CD you own. Year eight was form two.
Starting point is 00:03:52 Yeah, first CD you own. Go, I'm ready. I think it was Spice World. CD. Yeah, I think that might be right. Shania Twain, come on over. Yeah, with the fucking boys. Fucking A's.
Starting point is 00:04:03 How about the boys getting behind the ladies? Big time. How about that? Venga Boys was very early too, though. Yeah, well, that the fucking boys. Fucking A's. How about the boys getting behind the ladies? Big time. How about that? Venga boys was very early too, though. Yeah, well, that's erasure. Because one of those boys was abroad. What? Oh, I see.
Starting point is 00:04:15 Should have been the Venga fucking people. Yeah, yeah. The Vengas. They should bring it back as the Vengas. There should be a sitcom called The Vengas. What would it be? Would it be their band? It's them right now
Starting point is 00:04:26 They still share an apartment Was there an S Club TV show? Or was that a movie? One of the members of S Club just died recently Oh that's sad They were still young I think they were going to go on a tour Yeah fuck
Starting point is 00:04:38 How's the nostalgia tour industry? Oh it's booming I tell you one of the worst gigs I've seen Groove Armada either 20 or 25 year anniversary dog that was heartbreaking we were both at that gig i think we were sort of separate though weren't we we went were we together oh sorry we traveled separate we linked up oh yeah okay that i was with chelsea bella and meals and you and zoe were there and we were all grooving in the same pocket and we were all constantly waiting for the gig to get good.
Starting point is 00:05:06 Yeah, and then it just ended. It was like... Disastrous. Guys, come the fuck on. It was sort of the inverse of what I keep reading about Taylor Swift gigs. Taylor Swift is out there doing like 45 song, three hour sets.
Starting point is 00:05:21 I mean, there's a... Just hit after hit after hit after hit. There's a reason Taylor Swift is Taylor Swift yeah imagine maintaining that kind of fitness level like a purity she must disassociate how could you not although was this is interesting with music I feel like it's different yeah then stand up so it's so weird for that when you start doing your jokes too many times like during a festival and you're like it's so weird to say these and you're just watching yourself perform from slightly above your own body yeah it's and then it's quite
Starting point is 00:05:56 scary because you're like oh i'm gonna at some point i'll just like stop talking then what happens can i actually say something please for once can i have a fucking turn no legit i'm just saying this while i remember do you know i'm filming my show from this year i'm going to film it and release it on my own youtube channel and i'm filming it in brisbane good in july late july i'm doing two the tapings on the 29th of july and i'm doing a warm up on the 27th and i just want people to know that in Brisbane because I haven't announced it really. Gotcha. If you're in Brisbane or you know someone in Brisbane,
Starting point is 00:06:29 you've got to come to the table. Send him a line. Someone must be here. Not necessarily. All sorts of things. Send him off. He doesn't like Queenslanders. Nor should he.
Starting point is 00:06:39 Well, Tim, I've got to say, chairs, good ep. Yeah. And I'll see you later oh we're done no hold on or do you want to talk about um fast
Starting point is 00:06:49 fast I want this dog to shut the fuck up that's what I'd love do you want to talk about Fast and Furious 6 hey Rufus get a rest the
Starting point is 00:06:57 whoa farmer voice the 6th movie if you talk to okay if you talk to a fan they'd tell you it's the 6th movie in the Fast and the Furious franchise if you talk to Tim a fan they'd tell you it's the sixth movie in the fast
Starting point is 00:07:05 and the furious franchise if you talk to tim or guy we'd tell you it's the fourth and i mean debate to this very day which party is true it's difficult to get to the bottom of it first things first i'd like to apologize to our listeners in the previous episode because I paused the movie because I remember criticizing at the end of F7. They didn't have the like disclaimer being like, these are car stunts. They're filmed on closed roads. Don't try this to the very end. And I thought, what sort of litigious motherfuckers watching that all the way before they decide that they're not going to do it. And F6, before they even get into the meat of the credits they have a big thing
Starting point is 00:07:45 on the screen disclaimer these are performed on closed roads don't try this don't do this when we last watched the movie i paused it there to read it to bask in it to think about the difference between that and f7 and then i didn't push play we just kept watching today i didn't pause it i'd already read it that is only on screen for about five seconds and then you've got cars drifting and you guessed it tokyo yeah there's an after the credit sequence which we didn't watch last time and it is a fucking big one it hisses it's huge han is drifting against unknown races through the streets of Tokyo. Very busy pedestrian crossing.
Starting point is 00:08:27 What's the name of it? I think it's in Shibuya. Shibuya. I think that's what it's called. When you went to Shibuya, did you create some front-facing video content saying it's Shibuya in Shibuya? I did not. And that was a real missed opportunity on my behalf
Starting point is 00:08:42 and I'll never live it down. No. I think it's a miracle that you... I mean, a lot of people might not know this. A lot of people do know this. That's where you got engaged. Yeah. Not in Shibuya.
Starting point is 00:08:52 No. But in Japan. That's right. Do you want to marry your boy in Shibuya? Do you want to nip her on to the rest of our lives? Did you say that? No. I think she would have said no
Starting point is 00:09:00 if I'd pulled something like that, to be honest. I don't think it would have worked out. Down the line. Was it down the line? Down the line. Was it... It was a straight down the line sort of proposal yeah it was you weren't making puns out of place went to the ancient city so it's a bunch of like protected ruins and temples and stuff i want to protect your ruins until we're both in a temple okay fine i had the ring had the ring in the box burning a hole in my pocket the whole day yeah this day Do you know what
Starting point is 00:09:25 I know something about that ring It's one ring to rule them all One ring to bind them You're showing such a lack of respect for the story I'm going to bail on it So after the credit sequence is Han Racing through I'll respect it
Starting point is 00:09:41 It's not even a good story It's not my fault I know too many jokes I think it is actually It's not my fault my brain is full of gear The plan Proposed to Zoe in the ancient city Tourist hotspot Beautiful surroundings
Starting point is 00:09:55 Winter? Snowing? I like the setup I think that's right Beautiful Okay That's the plan But then we got out there and I was like
Starting point is 00:10:04 Zoe doesn't love big public That's right. Beautiful. Okay. Picturesque. That's the plan. But then we got out there and I was like, Zoe doesn't love big public. She's not a super extroverted person. She doesn't like big public displays of things happening and amongst the riffraff. Yeah. The people. What does she call them? The great unwashed.
Starting point is 00:10:19 That's what she refers to them as, yes. Yeah. Yeah. And so I kept the ring in my pocket and proposed her at the hotel instead yeah in the lobby in our room the elevator in our room we staying in the elevator i wasn't no we stayed in a room that's where i did it is an elevator a room there's no elevators in japan what there's no elevators in japan no they don't use them that's a lie it's escalators only you're having me on yeah it's a bit of fun it's pretty good it's a
Starting point is 00:10:51 nice life it's a nice level of life yeah take something that's like pretty common to your life and then pick a country that's culturally a little bit different just claim the thing isn't there yeah they don't have there's not there isn't a single spoon in russia no and that's not true and here's why because before the russian revolution the russian royal family they they were offended by spoons because rasputin had this weird premonition about one of them getting killed by a spoon so they they outlawed spoons and to this day even though like after the revolution the russian royal family's gone They still kind of persist with this cultural norm of banning spirits
Starting point is 00:11:28 It was believable I think it ran out a little bit of gas at the Rasputin The foretold thing Yeah, but that's actually not as unbelievable as you might think Rasputin held a lot of fucking power And he was a mystic So it's not it's not completely beyond the pale to think that he had a premonition of one of them being killed by a spoon and got them to ban spoons you know that song rah rah rasputin yeah love is greatest russia's greatest
Starting point is 00:11:57 love machine yeah is that pro uh it seems that it's very like it's upbeat gang gang gangas can more yeah um different guys i'm trying to think of the rest of the lyrics for that song i don't know the rest of the lyrics you're a lyrics guy it surprises me you don't know the rest of the lyrics. You're a lyrics guy. It surprises me you don't know the rest of that song. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know all the lyrics. I'm working on it. I'm always working on it.
Starting point is 00:12:32 Post-credits sequence. Han drifting through Tokyo. Not exactly where Tim proposed to Zoe, but not a million miles away either. Because that would be the moon. Yeah. Yeah. Do the the maths or the math han is racing unknown you know other drivers he a car sort of interrupts him mid-race flips him
Starting point is 00:13:00 he rolls he's trapped under the car stath gets out of the car that flips him gets on the phone performs a scene that we're already familiar with having watched f7 so i suppose you'd call this a flashback to f7 and uh he then says dominic teredo you don't know me but you're about to and then detonates an explosive device that blows up han's car so if you watched f6 in the cinemas not only did you witness the death of giselle godot but you also saw in the post-credit sequence which must have felt so flippant to die hard fans of the franchise the death of han so they killed off one of the core couples sequentially in the last half hour of the film yeah but han they put in the after the credit
Starting point is 00:13:51 like if anything based on my understanding of the importance of these characters han goes before the credits you kill giselle in the after the credit sequence you know and we know han's not dead because i mean no one dies it makes me want to track back to the mr nobody's explanation of how i pulled it off the mr nobody voodoo shit yeah good point so he says he drags the body out before the explosion happens and he treats it like it was staged that's right because he puts him behind a pillar where han's looking at the car explode which must happen very quickly that's right because i mean like behind a pillar where hans looking at the car explode which must happen very quickly that's right because i mean like and he's and then he said do you remember what he says and i'm paraphrasing because i can't remember the exact scripting but he says that's not even the
Starting point is 00:14:34 coolest trick i've pulled yeah that wasn't even the best one of those i've done the best one of those i pulled was on a cruise ship in 1987 when i seduced a spoiled heiress with amnesia into believing that I was her husband. Someone wrote a really cool theme song about it. Yeah. But it's a long story. It's one we don't have time for.
Starting point is 00:14:56 I really enjoyed this watch still. Did you? You were running hot and cold. Yeah, I know. We were being very antagonistic towards each other. You were being antagonistic towards me. I was being charming. I don't think that I know. We were being very antagonistic towards each other. You were being antagonistic towards me. I was being charming. I don't think that's true.
Starting point is 00:15:07 I was being very charming. I think we need an impartial third party to observe and assist so that we stop gaslighting each other. We need Patty Harrison back in the booth. Yeah, well, I don't know. She seemed like a semi, her own individual brand of toxic. Being spewed on top of the boys doing their toxic work. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:31 Do you think we need a, I mean, a phone call? Oh, is it important? No, but it's interesting. It's my friend, Ryan. I haven't spoken to him for a long time. Oh. I'm not going to take it. He's a good guy, Ryan.
Starting point is 00:15:43 He's a great guy. I'll call him back. He's got a cool car he's got like a jeep i think he sold the jeep he's in a hybrid corolla now oh there's nothing wrong with that but it doesn't have the same um well it's probably because he's he's he stopped doing the kind of work he was doing before he had to bring a nice car to kind of impress clients be like yo check me out i don't know he had to bring a nice car to kind of impress clients. Be like, yo, check me out. I don't know he had to impress clients with his car. I thought that was part of the thing. So it's like, yo, check it out.
Starting point is 00:16:12 I'm legit. I think he just likes nice things. Yeah, that's fair. Do you like nice things? Nah, I detest them. Do you? No, I don't detest nice things. I don't like luxury things though.
Starting point is 00:16:24 I think luxury things are a bit silly. What's a luxury thing? Like a watch? Like a Rolex? I had spent a lot of time in one of the airports recently. Socks? Do you know that clip? No.
Starting point is 00:16:36 I'm on DuckTales, Larry. You know that clip? What's a luxury item you couldn't live without? I don't know. Socks. Socks aren's a luxury item you couldn't live without i don't know socks socks on the luxury talking a private plane a private plane you know i'm from duck tales right oh man i forget the guy's name but he's the he's um the guy from community which i don't think you've watched so this isn't going to help which one joel mckale nope donald glover nope chevy chase nope i'm out yeah um it doesn't matter but i'll show you the clip later and most people know what i'm talking about now luxury items i'm not what say you uh well i was in an airport one of the airports recently and i went into the rolex shop
Starting point is 00:17:23 oh yeah and i was i there was just a young guy who worked there. What were you wearing and what was the response to you being in there? Was it similar to the scene in this movie where Tej and Hobbs turn up to the luxury car auction and a man immediately assesses that they should not be there? No, so I caught, there was some fella, some young floozy out front. Floozy. Who was, you you know he was grateful for the company and i i was very straight up with him i said how much are these watches can you show me the most expensive watch and can you show me the
Starting point is 00:17:55 cheapest watch you know and then there was some other like the got the boss dog who came out from out the back at some point and started yeah giving me look, being like, you're not going to buy one of these watches. I was like, yeah, but I'm building a fucking bond. And I mean, I think the most I've seen of them was like a quarter of a million dollars. And I was wearing like a Casio watch.
Starting point is 00:18:17 Bro, the Casio is fucking real. Are you wearing it now? No, right now I'm wearing a Garmin. Was it that classic Casio? Yeah, it's a classic Casio. Their Casio is so fucking good. Because I reckon it's a real good look too. And it's like 20 bucks.
Starting point is 00:18:30 I was with you when I bought that. Do you remember that? Was it in Oz? No, it was in New York City. We'd just taken Magic Mushrooms. And then we were about to walk across the Brooklyn Bridge. And we got lifted on that bridge. Do you remember that?
Starting point is 00:18:42 Yeah. Those were strong. Yeah, they were. we got lifted on that bridge you remember that yeah those were strong those were strong there was the walk when um there was like glow flies what are they called they were a little in the grass in new york they were like it's in the summer there was in their little glowy things glow flies and i was so confused and trying to desperately get to the bottom with you about if they were real and i was saying they were real you were saying they were real but i was like yeah but are they real when you're not high i remember pausing in the middle of the bridge and watching all the boats go under and the boats
Starting point is 00:19:12 all had personalities fuck that rules man nice but i bought the watch on the way because i wanted to know how long like i wanted to track the time oh i bought that casio you know what would go down a treat right now a chronograph yeah i bought that watch for 20 and look at it now not just a handsome timepiece and an ironic bit of catch they have in a rolex store but also memories wow since both of those moments um i was wearing it in the shower oh and i went to get the battery fixed and the guy said it's water resistant not waterproof. Did that flash through your head while you were showering? This watch is rusted.
Starting point is 00:19:50 Buy a new one. Yeah. They're cheap. I haven't yet. Did you get the gold one? Nah, it was plastic. Dude, get the gold one and it'll be like Gandalf the Grey
Starting point is 00:19:58 of Casio watches. It'll be like the old one died. It's like, no, it's back and it looks more badass than ever yeah they run like they're about a
Starting point is 00:20:08 I think slightly over 100 New Zealand we've got a lot of memories yeah man we've made a lot of memories years and years and years worth I wanted to
Starting point is 00:20:18 I wanted to describe you as being hot and cold during this watch because I felt like the last time we watched it it was pure love I mean it's hard to recapture the enthusiasm of seeing a felt like the last time we watched it it was pure love i mean and
Starting point is 00:20:25 it's hard to recapture the enthusiasm of seeing a movie for the first time in this watch you said not to me not to anyone really just out loud yeah you said vin almost to yourself i think you said vin smiles in this movie lots and it helps me yeah let's talk to that okay in this move so we have critiqued heavily vin diesel not emoting beyond a sort of grimace or a scowl particularly in f9 i think he's not responsive to any of the large-scale stunts or explosive moments he doesn't really smile or laugh he doesn't appear he just is he's plotting through life he doesn't take to appear to take any pleasure in the in the the inevitable highs of such an absurd lifestyle and it is a challenge to emotionally invest in a character like that because he's holding it he's the central guy and he's if he's not advertising
Starting point is 00:21:23 any emotional response then you're kind of at sea as to how you're meant to feel about him going through these things technically we know we're rooting for him but it's very difficult to be emotionally invested well i'm not confused by what we're supposed to feel i'm just like why should i be invested in this if you're not as a central character so what helps is in this one in fury do we know the title yet fast i'm looking at it i'm looking at a thumbnail that says fast and furious six but i'm also getting a flashback to joseph telling me that you can't believe any of the posters because there's like a discrepancy between the movie's real names that they get distributed as the marketing material
Starting point is 00:22:02 and then also what you see on screen at the start like they're all different it's called fast and furious six that is a shit title from what i can see um he smiles throughout the film in in in moments where you would expect him to smile when happy things are happening to him, but also when he's sort of teeing off and has a laser pointer from a sniper rifle pointed at him when he's interfacing with Shaw, with the big bad. We just call it talking. Talking with Shaw.
Starting point is 00:22:41 And there was something nice about that. I think that's a joke from friends by the way what i think at one it's nothing i think at one point ross describes flirting as interfacing he's talking to someone i can't remember who he's talking about in the future talking about computers and technology so you know we'd be this is we'd be interfacing and maybe someone says this is just talking i've got all this miscellaneous shit in my head it's good sometimes it bubbles up i'm sorry no it's embarrassing no no it's no i'm stupid i'm an idiot i'm a dumb dumb see this is the opposite
Starting point is 00:23:09 of what you were bringing during the the viewing i'm big dumb dumb he's had two coffees we've all have you all of us here have all had to oh rufus hasn't he's sort of blending in with the cat coward what would happen if you filled his water bowl with coffee? I reckon he'd like it and be like, nah, not for me. Yeah, it's funny. Imagine if he got real into it though. Coffee is... He'd probably get the shits.
Starting point is 00:23:31 I don't want to deal with that. Coffee is a gross taste. I've been drinking it a long time. I know I like it. Yeah. Alcohol is a gross taste. Yeah. It's poison.
Starting point is 00:23:39 Yeah. And what's funny, if you drink a gin and tonic, Yeah. you know, you're just making tonic taste, or say vodka and soda. You're making soda taste. Yeah, and who's funny, if you drink a gin and tonic, you're just making tonic taste, or say vodka and soda, you're making soda taste worse. Yeah, and who's excited to crush a glass of tonic water? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:53 But so then let's say you get off, you stop drinking outright, you go sober. But as part of it, you still want to create a challenge component to what are otherwise delicious drinks. Okay. So like rum and coke for an example and so you're like okay well i can't just drink coca-cola i need to put fake rum in the coca-cola i need to dilute the perfect like the science perfect taste of vinegar
Starting point is 00:24:17 vinegar is what it would be honestly it'd be vinegar vinegar would be the base like zero alcohol alcoholic drinks are basically just introducing challenges to what otherwise are perfect tasting drinks oh i see yeah you understand what i'm saying yeah but that's because zero alcohol drinks exist not in a vacuum but in a society and your own experience where you're very used to drinking alcohol and you have years of established, you know, memories of revelry and rituals around this taste and socializing. So if you can trick your brain that you're still consuming the substance without poisoning yourself.
Starting point is 00:24:54 I mean, isn't that an advertisement of the poison in the first place? Well, yeah. You can't just migrate off it. The point isn't, I don't think the point of zero alcohol drinks is to like death to alcohol. No. That's what Coke's trying to do. Coke wants death to alcohol?
Starting point is 00:25:13 Well, Coke should. Coke, no. Coke should be... Actually, Coke should be making way bigger swings at alcohol. Coke is collaborating with alcohol. I know. That's one approach to the enemy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:24 But the other is going, fuck these guys, they're poison. Who wins? Coke wins. Coke wins? Coke wins. Coke versus the US military, Coke wins. Coke wins full stop. Okay.
Starting point is 00:25:37 Irrespective of enemy. I'm going to call it, I don't know how to call it, but what about Coke versus Nike? Who wins? Coke wins. Coke versus McDonald's. Now that is interesting. I don't know. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:53 I almost think of them as the same thing. Well, Coke has infiltrated McDonald's. Yeah. They're working on the same team. Coke and McDonald's is like, what's a good... Because I was going to say It's like the USA and the UK But they're more like equivalent to each other
Starting point is 00:26:09 I feel like they sort of go together like Walla walla walla walla Shoo-ba-dee-bop-da-bop That's what I think For example Yeah, as a for instance As a for instance Do you think nike beats coke
Starting point is 00:26:26 i think i i know coke wins coke does win this is the battlefield we're talking about as well this is like we're not talking about who's worth more money we're not necessarily talking about mind share we're talking about like Those two guys are going at it Because Coke plays so dirty Coke is so powerful and it plays so dirty Yeah Coke versus What's it fucking called?
Starting point is 00:26:56 Who are the Who are the real baddies who keep In their CEO seat that You know, water isn't a human right Nestle? Yeah yeah nestle nestle v co nestle is a worthy opponent nestle but nestle is not definable like what do you think when you think nestle in my head i get two things i get either a kit kat or a tube of condensed milk so nestle is like the illuminati they're big and they're out there, but they're hard to pin down.
Starting point is 00:27:26 Coke owns Coke. I think so, but I don't know that to be a fact. Who's Unilever? Unilever is like Johnson & Johnson is under them, I think. And things like, I don't know. These are the questions. We should talk movie.
Starting point is 00:27:48 We've been talking about. You're not wrong. We were setting up sort of our challenged and charged relationship to Dominic Toretto in F7 through 9. Established and well-worn ground. The sort of delight that you see in him enjoying himself. I mean, I feel like the last time we were discussing the pleasure of Vin. By the way, I think before he changed his name to Vin Diesel,
Starting point is 00:28:13 he tried to call himself American Muscle. I think it's important that's on the record. But the last time I remember we were talking about him in these glowing terms was on his honeymoon in Cuba with a recovered from amnesia Leti. And it is a delight. And it actually, it speaks to, you know, the traditional progression of films, watching the first one through the sixth one.
Starting point is 00:28:36 I feel like I'm falling in love with Roman backwards. Yeah, dude. Roman is a big feature. Roman's getting funnier. He's great. He's great. He's a great look. He's great. He's great. He's a great look. He's fun.
Starting point is 00:28:48 He's funny. How's that little Easter egg? I don't know if you call it an Easter egg. How's that little touch on his private jet? Oh, yeah. I missed it the first time. On the tail, there's a shot for about two seconds as they're sort of transitioning to another bit of the world. And it says, it's Roman, bitches.
Starting point is 00:29:04 Yeah. He painted that on his private jet how much did they heist in rio 100 mil i think is the reference what do they split that six ways how many peeps are there so we should say they got 15 million dollars each yeah this that's not enough for a jet and it's not enough of what lute is doing as well like tish buys all of those luxury cars yeah that's got it's gone it's an emotional it's an emotional response to a smarmy racist brit yeah that's that's the thing and i'd actually love to know what the actor who plays the smarmy racist brit has been up to otherwise because i think he revels in the role i think he's a delight to watch i think he sells he sells the antagonism yeah i do too but here's my um parlay no what's my and i like hit back oh is your rebuttal something yeah yeah sure
Starting point is 00:30:00 counter counter to that is that i feel like that guy's role, so this is the, you know, we talked about him last time. You know who we're dealing with, folks. Yeah, you know what it is. That's a role that a lot of people could have done and done well.
Starting point is 00:30:14 Yeah. It's a caricature of a British, you know, we've seen that archetype done so many times and so many different things and he does a great job with it, but I feel like lots of people could have. It's what?
Starting point is 00:30:27 I mean, that's true, but I don't think it's a fair criticism, if you call it that, of... He beat out the other actors at the casting call. He did. He got the job. Congrats. He did exactly what was asked of him,
Starting point is 00:30:40 and yes. Should he get points taken away because a different actor could have done it probably not that's probably unfair you know that's on me i think that's part of the joy of this movie in addition to vin smiling is the the the comedy weave throughout there's just a lot more silliness there's a lot more fun in games and part of it isn't being in Britain. And I think there's a... But just throughout, they take more time to... So, like, there's even a tiny conversation between Dom and Han
Starting point is 00:31:13 to move the plot forward where Han finds out that there is a street race that Leti's involved in. So Dom can go over there and try and sort of win her back or figure out what's going on. And in the middle of that very small conversation, just because, like, these bits of exposition are necessary but kind of boring we've got in the background so this gets set up before they start talking immediately before they start talking as tej is showing no sorry roman grabs a gun that tej has made yeah and he's messing around with it
Starting point is 00:31:39 just like don't touch that you can't handle that gun I've proven myself with big guns and then in the middle of Han and Dom doing this bit of plot exposition the gun misfires and goes and fires a fucking steel harpoon harpoon
Starting point is 00:31:53 into the concrete wall between their two faces just to interrupt with a bit of a you know sight gag it's fun and it's fun
Starting point is 00:32:01 it is fun and there's lots of examples of that where they kind of undercut see in 9 9 especially and I don't have specific examples in my head it's it's fun it's fun it is fun and there's lots of examples of that where they kind of undercut see in nine and nine especially and i don't have specific examples in my head but i feel like they do the exposition without any humor there's no release about it's just like oh now we're
Starting point is 00:32:15 gonna fucking show you what's good it feels like metal gear solid half the time it's just like a convoluted plot full respect to the metal gear fans out there yeah by the way but like it it feels like this crazy overblown plot with no release valves i don't know how well i mean can i can i present a theory to you i don't know if that's i don't yeah can i present an idea to you yeah um literally anytime you want what maybe informs some of this lightness And why it might start to erode The further we get from this film Yeah
Starting point is 00:32:49 I think Because there's a scene we've spoken about before When Dom does actually go to street race Letty And they are having a sort of flirtation And it's quite It's sex It's a form of sex with cars It's interesting and sexy
Starting point is 00:33:02 Because here's people with an established dynamic Obviously you know Letty has amnesia now but we as the audience know that these are these are sort of soul mates as we understand in this universe and they're getting to come across each other for the first time in a manner of words again and it is sexy and it is fun yes and it's very flirty yes and um you know afterwards they sort of talk and he he recounts in quite a charged, and it's still sexy, but less fun, more like it's getting into the meat of their attraction. They're going through the scars that they share
Starting point is 00:33:35 or that Leti has, and he's sharing his memories of her and sort of establishing that they do have a pre-existing dynamic. And once more, it's sexy, and it's exciting to see them rekindling this romance it's exciting for us to know that lady is alive again after the fact that she was killed in fast five and it's um it's exciting for dom and i think we watch we have watched across the the following movies the spark in this relationship wax and wane
Starting point is 00:34:08 and probably that flame start to dim a little bit as perhaps the candle burns to its nub and the genuine attraction and excitement they feel around each other wane to an extent. And I think, I don't know if this is what's happened before fast six but i feel like probably watching them caught each other in that back and forth across the movies beforehand and watching that relationship develop and play out is very interesting and sexy and they're discovering new things about each other and that's exciting as well i think if letty didn't
Starting point is 00:34:43 if letty didn't have that crash and then suffer from amnesia before that relationship would have finished before um you know it would have finished off its own on its own terms it would have finished of its own steam uh just you know in a very boring sort of real life way where it's like you know all of this adrenaline we have coursing through our bodies all of these missions we're running this excitement we have in our lives is not enough to paper over the fact that we aren't doing it for each other anymore and we might work well together but that doesn't mean that this is a you know this doesn't have to be our romantic relationship for the rest of our lives it might be we need to take some time away and be colleagues heavy and so that gets
Starting point is 00:35:22 removed and you know it's like um i can't remember who says it maybe paul walker paraphrases joni mitchell in this where he says don't it always seem to go that you don't appreciate what you have until someone takes it away and i think that's what dom is experiencing and put that on a t-shirt somewhere and what lady's experiencing and i just think that think that it rekindles the relationship. It's like you see it, I used to see it when I watched... I do want us to make a Paul Walker in memorial T-shirt
Starting point is 00:35:53 that has some beautiful shots of his face in that quote that you just said. To the tune of. I just think, I mean mean it's just a theory but I think there's a lot of light and fun in this movie because we do get to see them falling in love again and you know that's exciting
Starting point is 00:36:14 and it feels authentic again but also I don't think that they're meant to be together forever and we see that as their chemistry fizzles out across the movies we've already covered, the prequels to Fast 6 and Fast 7, 8 and 9. That sort of, I mean, I don't know how clearly I articulated it,
Starting point is 00:36:33 but that's the theory. That's what I was angling towards. And that's, I think, what I wanted to say and share. It's an interesting thing to think about. And I think you're probably right. And the reason I asked how, when you said that the relationship with would fizzle out is i agree with you and i think letty would have ended it because i think dom is one of these dudes
Starting point is 00:36:51 it's a failure yeah a relationship not working reflects failure on him instead of perhaps mutual growth exactly because i think he is a man who has very traditional ideas of what family is a christian movie franchise it is so christian it is christian yeah it's it's chris tian it really is not that there's anything wrong with that it's chris it's t it's ian but it's the three of them that's the bit that um you know speaking of patty harrison i think i brought up the sort of American Empire building flavor to this franchise, and that is deeply imbued in that part of its DNA. It's like the Crusades, but the two things we're here to teach you is the way, the truth, and the light, and cars are pretty fun.
Starting point is 00:37:42 Yeah, and I also want to say inside of that, or, you know, another thing I was saying when we got into the weeds talking about the guy who got cast as the pompous British git is I think there's a lot of fun in this movie in the interplay between America
Starting point is 00:37:57 or like, you know, this cartoon of America and also the even more cartoonish caricature of England. And like even The Rock and his Judas Iscariot, that woman who is on his side until she betrays him. Nice, here we go. When they go to the security place and they say, we want to see the cameras. And there's this sort of big British laddie guy
Starting point is 00:38:22 who's like, oh, you want to see the cameras, dude? You know, he's like, what? Who's that? Who is it? Saint Peter. Oh, I see. We're still in the Bible. I didn't know either.
Starting point is 00:38:31 But he's, you know, and he's got, oh, you want to see, you know, and he's sort of trying to fob him off and then he does the big strong arm handshake and he crushes his hand. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:38 And it's funny. It's, I mean, it's like, it's a fun, basic comedic beat. It's like a traditional action movie trope. It's like a hand, it's a very, it's like it's a fun, basic comedic beat. It's like a traditional action movie trope. It's not an original idea, but it's very straightforward and clear and well executed.
Starting point is 00:38:51 And also on top of the difference in physical strength between the two characters, we have the collision of British and American ideology. And it's fun. You like that? It's fun. There's fun. There is fun peppered throughout this movie
Starting point is 00:39:06 there is enough fun to counterbalance the heavy and somewhat labored and over choreographed action sequences which is what makes the following movie so bottom heavy and makes it feel like they last forever yeah did you feel that as much in this one? I actually The arse on this one's not as heavy It's not as grunty, no In a good way So here's the thing, you're at act two Here I am
Starting point is 00:39:34 You're at the pinnacle of act two, the tank The snouty tank Fucking wrap it up What are we at duration wise at that point? Like an hour forty? But there's 44 minutes to go Yeah exactly, we don't need it No but get this What are we at duration-wise at that point? Like an hour 40? But there's 44 minutes to go. Yeah, exactly. We don't need it. No, but get this.
Starting point is 00:39:47 What? Get this. Here we go. You get through that and then they regroup and then they prepare for the final act, the big plane at night sequence. In the other ones, you're not concluding, you're not finishing the end of act two with 40.
Starting point is 00:40:01 You're at the start. You've got 44 minutes of act three to get through. 44 here you're finishing up an act you're having a bit of fun in between and then you're getting to what probably 30 minutes of action for the final act yeah but even so it's still not ideal it's still too long but like it's so this is the margins are closer i know but that's because we're going backwards So here they've still got the same structural problem with pacing and they just get more languid with it and overwrought as the movies go on because they get their eye off the ball even more. But it's still a problem that exists in this one. It's just it gets bigger as we go increasing in numbers for the Fs.
Starting point is 00:40:38 So like I say, have some discipline in your storytelling. Show us the tank tank he's got notes cram in um your fun switcheroos which i believe happen after the tank in terms of the woman switching side so we get a lady swapped for whatever the fuck your name is hobbs's um other yeah um cram that all in we've we've also got to get uh uh what's gal gadot's name again uh giselle giselle and han both have to die a bit early but we can we can we can bloody get there and we can all there's so much happening in the tank sequence anyway we can bloody put that in we can put that stuff in there all through just get that in chop off the final 40 and whole hot dog god damn i'm a
Starting point is 00:41:23 studio not oscar bait but fuck me what a film i'm a studio. Not Oscar bait, but fuck me. What a film. I'm a studio executive. I'm enjoying it in its current. Here I am. Okay. I'm in the room. You're in the room.
Starting point is 00:41:30 Yeah. I like it. I just think we need to be aware of what we're up against here at Marvel. You know, they're in space. They are playing with, you know, things that are far bigger than what we are allowed to here anchored to the ground. And so I just think we need more.
Starting point is 00:41:47 I don't think it's enough to build to that. We need another action sequence. Let me ask you something. Okay. When you're trying to put out a fire, do you use more fire to put out that fire? No, I call the fire brigade. And what do they do?
Starting point is 00:41:59 They use water. We are water. You've got to be water. You don't beat fire with fire. We are water. Marvel is Marvel. We're not going to out marvel marvel because only marvel can do that we are the fast and the furious and the first bit of the fast and the furious is fast and that's why i'm telling you gentlemen an hour 40 is our perfect runtime not 220 not a plane sequence at night we ended on a beautiful tank on a bridge
Starting point is 00:42:26 at an hour 40 I rest my case this man might be right but he's making me furious and thus concluding the second promise of the premise alright
Starting point is 00:42:39 we've got to do shining lights here's mine oh fuck I didn't do my top 5 vehicles I want to fuck in the movie we'll bookmark that for next time so I was supposed to do Shining Lights Here's mine Oh fuck I didn't do my top 5 vehicles I want to fuck in the movie We'll bookmark that for next time Because I was supposed to do it last ep
Starting point is 00:42:48 It was the first watch So much to love I mean Smile of Vin Well no I've already talked about it Smile of Vin sounds like a line in a witch's spell Toe of Newt Smile of Vin Make this movie fast again
Starting point is 00:43:06 Can I I'll give you mine I got one Yeah yeah please A criticism I have laid At the feet of the franchise And ludicrous The love that you're winding up with
Starting point is 00:43:18 Here's what I hate About the movie No no no no I think Too many of the characters Wear long trousers In warm climates It fucks me off It shits me no end They're wearing jeans on the characters wear long trousers and warm climates it fucks me
Starting point is 00:43:25 off it shits me no when they're wearing jeans on the beach they're wearing shoes in the sand in this movie dominic toretto and the rock are both seen in the canary islands of spain in the middle of summer wearing long trowel in the morning it pisses me off to the point i wrote it on my phone i said too many characters in long trail warm climbs but respite in the form of a recently minted ludicrous holidaying in god knows where shirt off rig out board shorts on shark tooth necklace looking fucking good the whole picture specifically the fact he's in shorts it advert advertises to me knowledge of self and weather that fills me with pride.
Starting point is 00:44:09 But the whole set up. The knowledge of weather that fills me with pride. That's right. Very good. Love that. There it is. Here's mine. There is a moment at the start of this movie
Starting point is 00:44:19 with these very cool skeleton car vehicles that Shaw and crew have made made which are like an incredibly bare-bones version of a car that is basically just an it's like the structural outline with a ramp built on at the top and they're very low to the ground i've got a very powerful engine so there's a very dramatic sequence where this woman who we've got a theory was way more in the movie and got cut out um blonde woman who British woman so yeah well that's my shining light is when yeah is so Paul Walker's car gets fucked up by her car flipped over and as she drives past and he's like in real trouble now
Starting point is 00:44:58 his car's upside down and she she's escaped there's a slow motion sequence where she almost drifts past him like it almost is a drift with that it's the camera the camera slows on slow motion air so slow and she winks as she goes past paul walker and i googled this briefly and nothing came up so maybe i'm wrong but it felt to me like a reference to this meme i've seen online of luigi doing that in Kart. So, I don't know. But it was my shining light this time. I'm happy for you. And that is that. Second watch of F6.
Starting point is 00:45:31 All in all, you'd have to say, pretty good. What if I told you I only had to watch this movie four more times? Here for it. That would be crazy. I'm here for it. Well, that's the number. See you at the next one. Yeah. 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

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