The Worst Idea Of All Time - Episode Sixty: Bloody Money (ft. Matt Gourley)

Episode Date: December 13, 2017

Guybo and Timbly are joined by the lovely and talented Matt Gourley for a live LA show to end this God forsaken project. Let's not beat around the bush, Monty is hammered, Tim is a rambling shambles but luckily Matt's sharp mind is able to deliver the most incisive deconstruction of WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS to date. Also, one banging hot pitch to executives, periodically interrupted by two dumb boiz. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Are you going to play that dastardly intro again? You forget that films are supposed to have a point. Good evening, Los Angeles. How the bloody heck are you? That's good. What a way to start a podcast. Welcome to the worst idea of all time episode. This is the last fucking one.

We are done. I'm standing. This is unprecedented. Who could sit at a time like this? We just, it's gone now. It's done. We're finished. Take a photo, take a video. I don't give a shit. I would see some phones in here. This is an auspicious occasion. Before I get too elated and too deep into it,

can we please welcome to the stage an incredibly special guest joining us this evening on the 60th watch. First for him, it's Matt Gourley, ladies and gentlemen. Hi, everybody. Hi.

Oh, I am so thrilled to be here. Standing too. I'm going to stand. I was afraid I wouldn't have that much to say about this film when it started. It has broadened my mind. I have so much to say.

So much to say. That's good, man. Yeah. Because I have nothing left. That's okay. I've got a chart. I've got a timeline. All of these represent

at least a half hour. Ladies and gentlemen, this is a podcast. This is like this specific episode uh dedicated i think i mean to matt's notebook but also i think a little bit about feelings i want us to talk about our feelings in there you are all feelings so Yeah, I'm full of feelings, sure. It's just not what I imagined. It makes sense. Of course we talk about our feelings.

How do you feel, Guy? So good. Yeah? Literally as good as I've felt in four years. Yeah. It is... It's a sweet release isn't it it's uh i feel like we've tricked death you know the grim reaper came and tapped on our shoulder and was like time to go boys and we were like you dude we're bouncing that you guys are serving hell on earth now and you will be rewarded in the afterlife yeah you seem pretty

confident about that no i know for a fact i got a line on this yeah this is happening it's very it's good man because you know i don't really think too much of it but now so look if this is your first time tuning into the worst idea of all time this is is a podcast where Guy Montgomery, international piece of shit, and myself watch and review the same movie. What are you? Are you just yourself?

Yeah, I'm just Tim. I'm an international piece of shit. Yeah. Do you want to know why? Because you moved to New York. And you want to know something else?

You're a real piece of shit, Guy Montgomery. I think you should also be something. You're, you know of shit, Montgomery. You should also be something. You're nationally okay. Great serve, mate. That's a decent burn. I got you, man.

I got your number, motherfucker. This is a podcast which has been parading as a film review podcast. We're in. Guy and I watch the same film and review it once a week, every week for a year, except in the years where I penalise us for letting lapse a few weeks in between takes. But in actual fact, it's a podcast about feelings. So here's some of mine. Elation. Joy. so here's some of mine elation joy uh happiness release and don't do that

gross release isn't a feeling isn't it yeah and you don't see many of those what do i see man just ready isn't it? Yeah, and you don't seem any of those. What do I seem, Matt? Just ready. I am ready. People are listening to this mostly, but we must make mention of your shirt. I'm ready.

I'm ready. I bought this shirt because it reminded me of SpongeBob so much. And so you saying I'm ready is like perfect. Yeah, yeah, you're ready to go. Like to cross over. Is that not the loudest shirt you've ever owned? Yeah, I actually think it is. And I bought it just today, just for you folk. Well, mainly myself because I get to wear it.

But I thought, you know what? Time for a fun shirt to celebrate an auspicious occasion and so I did and here it is. It's got a lot of jellyfish and some crazy colours and the gentleman who sold it to me gave me the back story and it turns out it's from a company which became famous in the 1940s for really pushing the

envelope on Hawaiian shirts and their colour palettes I was intrigued, fascinated and captured by this old man's tales of days gone by and colours that we haven't seen in fashion for a long time. And there I was, a sitting duck, a foreigner, who had changed his money for an indiscriminate exchange rate and just started throwing notes at him. How much is the shirt? I never said. Just started throwing money and he said, great. Love what you're doing here.

And then eventually my wallet was empty and the shirt was put in a bag and I was on my way. I actually, I was going to say this, but I was in the same shot with Tim. You guys met the ghost of Tommy Bahama? Yes.

He's taken a pretty powerful physical form. You guys are ready. You are ready. And he's done some pretty fine wares down wherever the fuck romancing the bean is, which is the cafe from the movie that Tim and I went and had a lovely breakfast burrito at this morning.

And first of all, the breakfast burrito is nothing morning. And, first of all, the breakfast burrito is nothing but egg and cheese, which is not enough ingredients to breakfast egg. It didn't even provide a hot sauce, which was intriguing. You can't have like

three white foods, egg, burrito and cheese and not throw a little spice in there, do you know? You've got to have something to break it up. Chuck some veggies in there. Red onion would have sufficed. Capsicum. Mayonnaise.

No. Mayonnaise would be something. A little salt. Anyway, I mean, I read the Yelp page for that cafe a while ago and some of the arguments that were laid forth, which seemed pretty wild at the time, now sound pretty all right. But when we were there, we talked to the guy behind the counter and we said, did you know that the movie We Are Your Friends was filmed here?

And he said, yes, I did. Have you seen it? And we said yes 59 times and he said okay yeah he said okay yeah they filmed in here over there that's where Zac Efron and Emily Radich-Karski's characters broke up. And Guy said no. That's where

they forged their relationship, dude. That's basically where they got together. And this guy went, oh, okay. I've only seen the movie once but they filmed a bunch of different endings. And then Guy and my oh, okay. I've only seen the movie once, but they filmed a bunch of different endings. And then Guy and Maya's imagination ran wild. And we locked a stare with this gentleman. Was there a breakup scene that they potentially shot?

Yes. So there is multiple endings potentially sitting around. Fuck off. Yeah. But we digress. Anyway, look. That's a worthy digression, I think. If ever someone was allowed to digress on you.

Can I? Sorry, you go. No, look. That's all by the by. No, go. I'll go. What I was trying to tell you was that at the store where you bought that shirt, I also bought some things.

And because you got, I saw what you paid for the shirt, and it's a fine shirt, but that man made a prince-less-um. What do you pay? I actually also... I'll never tell. I'll double it. I got very excited in the store and thought, because it's the last show, I would buy gifts for all of us.

And I bought gifts, which I have in my pockets. So they're real warm? Matt, do you want to provide audio commentary for our listeners at home on what guys are tipping to do right now? Well, right now his fingers are sticking in kind of a soiled and frayed pocket. I bought them like that.

It's called fashion, idiot. All right. Okay. So I bought gifts for all of us, and the first gift is for you, Tim. Okay. They're all badges, by the way. What's a little badge?

New cologne, or have you been rolling in dog shit? What the fuck? Can I say something? Guy bought this at the store and was... He said to the proprietor who in retrospect definitely ripped me off of the shirt

I would like to have a look at those badges but we've got to keep it secret because I'm buying a present for my friend over here so I was expecting

something very specific that relates to me like some sort of it hits on something in my past this is just a dumb gag badge that you could

have given to anyone look on the back of it how much should it cost five bucks it's not the most expensive one in this guy is charging a lot of these badges what is this billionaire with a vintage store Some billionaire with a vintage store. Just next to romancing the bean. Anyway, I got one for you as well, Matt. And this one I think is good. Peace on earth.

Hold on, but is that... I thought it was in the font of The Hobbit, but it isn't, so who cares? $12. Yeah. Wait, what? I don't choose the prices, man. I just buy the badges. There's a clue on here.

In the small corner, it just says Gil, G-I-L. Is this a consignment shop where people have little corners and booths? This is Gil's corner? That is possible. As far as I could tell, this guy is a billionaire. Gil? Yeah.

And he's just doing whatever the fuck he wants. This is the nicest inflated price badge I've ever received. It gets worse. I bought this one for myself. What is it? It says big boy for president. Fucking hell. Let me attempt to move this along.

And it cost me $35. There's no way that's true. Really? Holy shit. Matt Gourley is confirming the authenticity of that price. What about this badge? Tim, I got you one more badge as well.

Oh, okay. There is another one. Oh, now that's a winner. It's a McCain-Palin Republican ticket from... Oh, my God. No, 2012 badge. This is great. Thank you, sir.

$12.50. Eat it, Matt. Hey, thank you so much, Guy. That was really sweet of you. I appreciate it. That was a bad idea. Yeah. Hey, Matt, can, thank you so much, Guy. That was really sweet of you. I appreciate it. That was a bad idea. Yeah. Hey, Matt, can I ask you?

We've seen, I'll put mine on in a moment. We've seen the film, obviously, 60 times now. This was your first take of the Zac Efron slightly indie venture, We Are Your Friends. What did you make of it? This movie is my worst nightmare. And not watching it, I enjoyed this process. I like watching movies for this kind of reason.

Hold on. Let's delve into that a little bit. What do you mean by that exactly? Well, you know, for a podcast, and it's often something I do. Guys, just bust out a disposable camera to take a shot. Such is this boredom. No, I'm listening, Matt. I'm just excited.

Alright, take it easy. Peace on Earth, you guys. Big boy for president. Or McCain-Palin. You gotta choose a side. Where do you stand? But if I were to live in this world, it would be my worst nightmare. I just don't...

I just am tired. It seems tiring to have to live that life. I just don't... I just am tired. It seems tiring to have to live that life. I've got bad news for you, brother. Oh, season four? No. You know how there was an after the credits scene where Tanya Romero receives the cash from Zac Efron from him ripping off everyone and stealing the houses? Tanya Romero included.

Yeah, correct. Blood money. We didn't get to the after the full credit scene, but that's when it is revealed that we are living in the same universe as we are your friends. No. So I'm sorry for that revelation,

but we're in it. Did you not see that end titles credit where it says this movie took place in the same universe that you exist in? Open parenthesis, we're talking to you, Matt. They get that specific? Fuck.

The original release title of this film was We Are Your Friends, Matt. But some executive changed it. Wait, no, I love this movie. No, sorry. Hold on. No, no, no. What is this about, face?

Mister, this is my nightmare. I like to have friends. Oh, wow. This, no, no. What is this about, Face? Mister, this is my nightmare. I like to have friends. Oh, wow. This movie is for you. Yeah, it is my friend. I don't want to be in this world, though. I don't want to live in the... I don't want to run with this gang.

You know what I mean? It's tiring. I don't like that they're just... They're somehow suffering for something that isn't an art. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Who did you not like the most? Oh, boy.

Well, I made a little chart here. Let's get through some notes, shall we, man? Let's dive into that notebook. You got Cole, you got Squirrel, you got Jarhead and Johnny Depp, right? I just want to let you know, I'll be got Jarhead and Johnny Depp, right? I just want to let you know, I'll be right back, and I am listening the whole time. Okay.

Seems suspicious. I'm not lying. Yeah, I'm listening. Okay. These are like character parables or archetypes from Trainspotting and Entourage. Have you guys covered this? We have not spoken about this. So Cole is Renton from Trainspotting and Vinny from Entourage.

Squirrel is Spud and Turtle. Jarhead is Begbie and Drama. And Depp is Johnny Lee Miller and E. Also, this... I would argue that Jarhead is E and Johnny Depp is Johnny Drama, but otherwise, sir. But they're the troublemakers,

the rabble-rousers, you know? Well, they are rabble-rousers. Yeah, thank you. Also, I'm convinced that whoever made this film had something like... Maximum Joseph and Megan Oppenheimer, who I should hope are in the audience this evening. Make yourselves known!

Chickens. It's fucked up. He definitely lives here. Anyway. Look at this. They had these films on their shelf in this order.

Train Spotting, Saturday Night Fever, Glen Gary, Glen Ross, Point Break, Boogie Nights, Usual Suspects, and back to Train Spotting because here it goes.

It starts with Train Spotting and the voiceover and you learn the characters. it goes to saturday night fever where you learn the world then it goes to glenn gary glenn ross for the real life intrigue of working day men then you go to point break for the mentor apprentice relationship with the love triangle of the girl that belongs to the mentor but wants to be with the apprentice into the fall of the characters of boogie nights then to the usual suspects wants to be with the apprentice into the fall of the characters of Boogie Nights then to the usual

suspect's twist of using everything from the film for your like denouement and then back to Trainspotting for the repeat voiceover.

Matt, while that is brilliant you have pretty much undercut the last 59 weeks of mine and Tim's life. Well, it's good we're wrapping this up. But I have a question for you guys. All three of your co-hosts were impressed by that, Matt.

It's great. I have a question. What? I have a question for you guys. No, hold on. Why? You got a weird look on your face. No.

Yes. No, you don't have... Yes, guy. You got a weird look on your face No Yes No you don't have Yes guy Oh is that A third player appears Third co-host The knife gen 3 The audience do not look delighted

To see this I'm concerned How have you been travelling with that Have you been travelling with that to see this. Oh, it's hard to think why. Concerned. How have you been traveling with that? Have you been traveling with that? Oh, man. I'm so glad you asked. So, I actually think I told this story in the New York episode,

which hasn't come out yet, so I'll forgive you for not having heard it yet. Do you not remember, Tim? I know you're such a die-hard fan. How could you not remember? It was a bit two nights ago. I took it through. I had a closed circuit feed of that, so I have heard this. Yeah? I know you're such a die-hard fan. How could you not remember? It was a bit two nights ago. I took it through. I had a closed circuit feed of that,

so I have heard this. Yeah. Well, you're being very kind to be the audience surrogate there for these lovely LA people. Ladies and gentlemen, the knife, as we all remember, Gen 1 got lost to some TSA agents

who were disguised in Australia as Australian customs officials. And I'm sorry to say that the knife Gen 2 was also taken by similar kin when I forgot to put it in my checked-in luggage. But I'm glad to say that for merely one episode, we have the Knife Gen 3 joining us.

So he's, like you, Matt, making his worst idea debut and exit all on this same show. Tim earlier described that knife to me today as the bluntest knife that ever knifed. But it's got a good weight to it, so you can sharpen things. It's health heavy. Health heavy. I didn't realise we were dealing with such a pro, Matt.

Holy shit. Matt's busting out some real stabby knife tricks. Jesus Christ. Matt is currently performing some pretty incredible knife work. Is that good, man? That's amazing. No, no, no. No, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no. At least let me put the blade away so we don't... No, we'll leave. We're good? Yeah, it's okay. Nothing has ever gone wrong with a knife just lying around. It's fine. Okay, so the last time

I owned a leather jacket, which was one time in my life, someone put it on and it looked fabulous on them and I see, goddammit, now I don't own a leather jacket anymore. That is your knife. No, really?

Yeah, absolutely. I couldn't do what you just did. That is now your knife. It's found its rightful owner. Oh, thank you. Goddamn. I will put it on the shelf of podcast treasures. How big is that shelf, you sad man?

Getting bigger and bigger every week. Hey, so, sorry, jumping back into the notebook, I love that you have managed to absolutely rip apart this film by figuring out which movies it's aping That's great Let me ask you this, Matt How did a film which did so famously poorly at the box office draw in so many hits and yet miss itself?

I don't know, that's a good question Thank you You're welcome It's like the sum of its parts are somehow less than the total I don't know it's just yeah it's like a bad bicycle yeah hold on yes yeah yes too many bits ruins a bike guy do you think that bikes are too complex

no if you get a good one what's a good bike to you just exactly as many parts necessary not one more or less than you need? That sounds perfect to me, Matt. So what, like a bell, like a bell on the handlebars, is that a bell too far? If you need a bell, then a bell it shall be. Are you anti-mountain bikey? I'm all for mountain bikes, if you live in the mountains. Okay. So, Matt, jumping right back into that night boat,

what else did you have down there my friend? Well I have a question for you guys Okay, so you guys, you did Grown Ups 2, you did Sex and the City 2 Those are clearly to me movies that are made for a payday, they're jobbers This actually seems like someone set out to make a passion piece How did that, you don't I'll say what you will about how shitty this movie is someone's heart and soul went into this thing I'm not saying they were

successful but or that they had a heart or a soul but it went into it yeah and so that that how did you feel watching something like that word this I this had to be made by a DJ right this is a DJ's movie I mean we know DJ we made the we met all the people who made it except for maximum Joseph who we've met and it's Joseph yeah he's not a DJ we know him for his you know gonzo television shows catfish all right it's a documentary yeah Yeah About cats that like water And who might be fish No they're definitely cats

It's a pretty amazing movie though Because I mean traditionally felines are afraid of The substance we call water Yeah A couple of bits of hydrogen One part oxygen Yeah yeah You know what cats call it, though?

Meow. And they fucking hate this stuff. They absolutely hate it. Yeah, I know. Maximum Joseph managed to find some freaks out there in the big cat world. Do you feel that he was making something that he considered art? Because that seems to be a theme of this film. 100%.

Yeah, it's felt pretty bad this year watching someone try so hard week after week and very rarely meet the standard. And yet it's a movie about that very thing. It's true. But even within the movie, Ziccoli's character is pursuing electronic dance music success, fails.

Even within the film when he succeeds at the music festival, he fails objectively to achieve that goal of being good at his job. You're absolutely right. It took you 60 watches to get such a crystalline observation from the movie. Better late than never. I am so impressed. I've been thinking about this for a while now. My word. I'm talking to the audience from here on out.

I'm not talking to Guy and Matt. I'll talk to Matt and three of the audience. This is the last one. You can do this. Yeah, we're cool, man. We're friends. We are your friends, Matt. That wasn't somehow threatening. No, that's just how I say it. We are your friends, Matt. That was somehow threatening.

No, that's just how I say it. We're friends. Yeah, yeah. Friends need to say it out loud and gift knives to each other. That's how you know friendship is there. We are your friends. Matt, we've got a couple of established benchmarks in this podcast, which we've been dipping back into the well of throughout the season.

And if, Guy, I may be able to count you in. Whoa, you look not happy about this. Are we cool? No, I'm just squinting, man. I'm cool. Oh, okay. Sweet. All right.

Now my eyes are much more wide open. Fantastic. Five, six, seven, eight. Getting sentimental with James Reid. Yeah. It's... Dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee- from a popular New Zealand rock band called The Feelers. And he's now... Yeah. Those are some good songs. We've got some Cantabrians in the audience, right?

No, we don't. That fell flatter than anything I've ever said in front of a crowd of 100 people. But more or less, he gifts... At some point during the movie, he gives Ziccoli the gift of a MacBookbook pro box the contents of which are never revealed to us mere audience members uh and so for this our 60th and final screening of we are your friends i would really like for you to tell us what in god's name you

think is inside of that box well i hope this hasn't been said before because it seems like the obvious choice especially as they're stealing from all these like seminal films that it's clearly he's going to open it up and it's just the light from Pulp Fiction. But what is it? Exactly. No, no, no. People don't generally get the opportunity to define what

was in the briefcase the whole time, but you, Matt, do right now. Okay, I guess I do, but let me throw this at you. We also talked about, you asked me whether or not they actually have sex in that scene, you know? Yeah. We will need to provide a little more context. So it's Ziccoli and Somerle in one scene.

They hook up at a music festival and they go back to a hotel room and, you know, the filmmakers dance around exactly what happens in the hotel room. Rest assured, they may or may not have had sex. I asked Matt entirely without sort of suggesting which way to lean. Oh, but fuck you. I was going to let it slide, but no. Fuck you, man.

That's fair. Pretty much. That's so fair. Pretty much, you were going to say whether or not you thought they had sex. Well, I'm not going to say that's the thing, is that I think that this film takes itself so seriously that the reason I can say it's the light from Pulp Fiction is because they're leaving it ambiguous enough

as to whether or not they had sex in a way of like, how did Inception end? Waiting for Godot. Like, this is for you to now, now we've made our art, now you put your art on this. Did they? You are in this film.

You decide whether they conceive a child and it grows up with Richard, the dispossessed kid that lives in the home with the mom that... But they fucked. I just... Yeah, they fucked. They fucked.

They copulated. They do because Wes Bentley confirms that later, basically. When does he confirm it? Well, he says, you fucked. And what is Sid in response? What is... I don't remember. No, you don't.

No, his response is exactly that perfect ambiguity. He went... Yeah. So I guess, in a way, we'll never know. Exactly. This movie wants you to keep asking the hard questions. You fucking dragged like two smart funny guests into this dumb idiotic conspiracy theory of yours. Just to fucking get in there.

I'm with you. I tell you what. Fucking bullseye motherfucker. You son of a you son of a gun I do think they did though personally that would be what

I would put on it but I think the film itself is saying we don't want to tell you what to think that's right it's that pretension this film's saying

a lot of things I don't think that's one of them here are some things this film is saying top 21 one boys are dumb number two house music sucks number three EDM I don't think that's one of them Here are some things This film is saying Top 21 One Boys are dumb

Number two House music sucks Number three EDM Take it or leave it Number three People like Johnny Depp Exist in the world

You just said two number threes I know That's why I'm counting on my fingers To make sure I don't get caught out That doesn't work Because you just You just got caught up Everyone's got range He doesn't just have to just got caught up. Number four, everyone's got range.

He doesn't just have to be in High School Musical. Number five, Johnny Weston. He can act sometimes, but, you know, not the whole time. Number six, sometimes within one movie you can change a character's hair and no one will notice if you put it in one of those transitional scenes. Number seven, you know what's fun to break up a movie that isn't working too good? Some interstitials involving animation. Number eight, hey, pumping

beat will forgive many script woes. Number nine, editors. Who needs them? Number ten, Megan Oppenheimer. Her uncle created the atomic bomb and his niece created a bomb of a film. Number eleven. Are they related, really?

Number eleven, it's And his niece created a bomb of a film. Number 11. Are they related, really? Number 11. It's important to name your film after the title track of said film. It encourages memory on what's going on. Number 12. Just because you've released a film to a lot of cinemas doesn't mean a lot of people will see it. Number 13. That's a good one. Emily Radishkowski. Actor, model, you decide

It can't be both Number 14 Can you improvise a scene in a film That costs multiple millions of dollars to make? Sure, why not? There are no rules Number 15 Poetry in motion can apply to anything

if you say it with enough confidence. Number 16. If you run out of things to say in a movie, you can just play some music and film anything you want and edit it together, and suddenly you've got a montage. 17. Right, 17.

17. If you run out of things to say in a list, you can say anything, and if you use the word poetry in motion, people will buy whatever you're telling them. Number 18. Directing a film is a lot like life. Sometimes people will listen to you.

Sometimes they won't. But either way, as long as you have a plan, you might fail. Number 19. Is that right? 19? I would say directing a film Is a lot like getting through A list of 21 things

I'm so close Incredibly challenging Number 19 If you can't come up with A compelling story Of a hero's journey Maybe put four central characters In your film

And then introduce A whole bunch of Secondary characters Spread the load Number 20 If at first you don't succeed, make a show called Catfish and then convince some executives to give you money

for a motion picture and then fail in such a historic fashion that a podcast picks you up for holding a record for how poorly the financials of your film was and it will gain a second life. And of course, number 21. There is hope for everybody.

Of course. Of course. Wow, that was very well impressive. Because this is highly unorthodox, but this occurred to me so strongly in the film, is that what's in that MacBook Pro box? My dudes? My dudettes?

My people who associate with neither dudes nor dudettes in describing themselves. What is in that box is hope. Truly. And I think that actually... That's what the Pulp Fiction... Exactly. ...to me would be.

Yes. What is more hope? How more could you describe hope visually than a shining light? Hey. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's pretty neat and tidy. Matt has described literally what's in the MacBook Pro box, the shining

light. How crazy is that? Yeah, it's pretty cool. I'm not even on mushrooms this time. It was a real journey. I'll tell you what my shining light was this week, if you're asking, which you kind of are.

I've never liked it when Jarhead is tossing a gold bar in the background of Frame, whilst the Coley talks to Tanya Romero and begins the process of stealing her house. But he's tossing a gold bar and he says, Cole, come check this out. Cole, baby. And then the scene continues.

And the way he said coal, baby, this evening, I was like, that is affection. That is friendship. I don't necessarily like you as a person. Yeah. But I now like the fact that you like your friend enough to enjoy calling him coal, baby, in a professional environment

in your first week. That's love. He doesn't give a fuck. He's disrespecting his employer by not working at all. His screen isn't like open on a spreadsheet. It's dark. He hasn't been on it for five minutes.

He's holding not his gold bar. The guy's irresponsible with money. He has found a gold bar in the office, just picked it up as though it's anyone's property, started throwing it around in his hand, and as if he's not drawing enough attention to how incompetent of an employee he is, he's just like, fuck, I love my friend Cole.

As much as I hate this job hey Cole baby he catches it powerful yeah and then moment and then coldest keeps it I think of a fuck he's like I can give your friends with me I'm busy I got to take this lady's house from her. Immediately. And he does. Credit to him. What a brilliant shining light, guy. Thank you so much. Yeah, I guess I really empathised with the characters this week. I guess so, dude. Matt, did you have a moment in the film

when you were watching that permeated through the fog of maybe not liking it too much into like, that was a cool moment, man. It's the most realistic vomit scene I've ever seen because there is that sound of like, usually when you see vomit in a film, it's someone's mouth is full of some substance that they spit out

and it just sounds like they're spitting, but there was like a resonant guttural like launch pad of a sound in there that I have to hand it to and they didn't show show him like spit a bunch of Campbell's soup out you just heard that sound may I normally wouldn't put people on the spot but you are noted and gifted improviser famous for your roles and super ego community drunk History and other things. Could you please do that sound for us? Oh my God.

That was so much more realistic than I was expecting. And I was expecting something good, but that made me physically ill. Holy shit, dude. That's the point, right? You are a good actor. You should have been in this goddamn movie. You might have saved the thing. Fucking hell.

Game recognize game. Oh boy. So I mean for you was it do you think that was either ADR or some sound effects that got added on later or do you think that was Zac Efron just being a good actor? Yeah I can I think that's ADR but some sound effects that got added on later? Or do you think that was Zac Efron just banging?

No, yeah, I think that's ADR. But I think it's great ADR. But by Zac? Like you think he came into tape or something? You know he didn't sing all the numbers on High School Musical on the soundtrack. He's been known for using ADR before. Are you, is that true? I don't know, maybe.

This is how the worst kind don't know, maybe. This is how the worst kind of rumours get started. Here's an idea that maybe could have happened. I watched that movie like 10 times

and someone told me and it stuck with me, you know, I did my research. Are you fucking serious? Yes. How do I not know this about you?

I've never seen High School Musical. You've seen it 10 times? Do you have another podcast? Not everything deserves a podcast, Matt. We'll see about that. We are testament to the fact that

almost everything can be a podcast. Damn, man. Hey, so shit, really? Did Zac Efron not perform all the numbers on the soundtrack or you made that bit up? No, no. Some things you hear by happenstance and you choose to believe. And some things you hear by happenstance and you're like,

no, I'm either going to research that or just choose not to believe it. This one I took on board and I was like, I'll tell other people about that. Nice. Be part of it. You're saying he didn't sing it or that he was ADR'd by himself? Can you? Can one ADR oneself, Matt?

I mean, yes, that's what ADR is. It's a simple answer. All right, Guy's clearly bored with this trick. He's pulled out the disposable camera again. It's a learning moment. Just took a still photo of himself on a disposable camera. Such was the poignancy of the learning guys just experienced.

But I think that someone else recorded the most of his numbers on that movie. Oh, okay. And if I met him I would not bring it up.

I would try and become friends with that guy. Yeah, yeah. He seems fucking awesome. Yeah? Yeah, I like him. Can I throw a shining light at you, boys? I would like nothing more.

Yeah. Fuck, I love you, Tim. I love you so much, bro. I love you too, man. It was such a ripe opportunity to call you a piece of shit, and I just, I can't do it. I can't do it. It's because you're wearing your badge on your shirt,

and it's just such a confusing one too no one who would wear that shirt would wear a badge running for McCain and Palin especially in 2017 I don't know if you've met America yet there's a scene in the film which is in the moments and actually

for a bit of context so I'm really sorry to spoil the film for which is in the moments, and actually for a bit of context, so I'm really sorry to spoil the film for anyone, but Squirrel dies. And immediately before it happened, Matt saw what was transpiring and what was about to be revealed and was kind of devastated. And I don't want to talk for you, but I'm going to continue to do so.

Not devastated at the moment of that character being robbed from us but at the film thinking that it was entitled to kill a central character off like it had earned that i was offended that it thought i cared enough about this character that i would be moved by that you say that now but at the time you said how can you kill him he is the only one i care about that is what you said but that is true but but that like is so relative that it's still not enough relative to characters that i not only care about i would go out of my way to write out of this film i think if i were the writer i will pay you to try and help you

with the script and i'll tell you what everyone gone. Everyone's gone. My shining light was in that moment when they first wake up post-party, there's a bit of talk, a bit of chatter about a banana. And the banana is actually in shot, is sort of in soft focus in a few of the frames. I'm so fucking glad we're talking about the banana, man. I've wanted to bring it up for so long, and here you are doing it. Here's the thing about the banana. Like, the banana is talked about, and I think it's in focus in maybe a couple of shots that exist on the screen for half a second.

But it's also, it's like, you know when you do like an over-the-shoulder shot and you got fuzzy for the person who's right by the camera, give you the perspective, you're looking at someone. It's like they're doing an over the shoulder of the banana itself so all of a sudden you feel like within the film the bananas stuck around for its own coverage yes yes and it's doing a great job and something could have gone to the dressing room but it stayed to deliver the lines from a technical point of view view, absolutely. That's how you get noticed. Yeah, well, that's how you get work in this town, right? But from an emotional point of view, as a viewer of the movie, you're like, I am now the banana.

And in some ways, aren't we all the banana to someone? Because what is the banana doing? The banana sacrifices itself in the wake of the party where the boys have poisoned their bodies to the point where one of them is tragically passed away. It's not that big of a tragedy. Most of them are just hammered.

They've had too much alcohol and how do you boost yourself back up? You have a banana. It's a good source of potassium. But what happens to the banana? The banana gets devoured. You know?

So I'm just saying like you combine their philosophy with the film language they've used, and suddenly it's like they're trying to make us the banana. And I felt like there's something in that for all of us. Yeah, we are the banana. We are sacrificed. We are squirrel.

We are your friends. Exactly. Exactly. The other thing with the banana is he peels it too fast. You see him pick it up not wrong and you're like yeah cool and then like there's a shot of someone else and then a second later he's eating an open banana and i'm like okay even if you did open it that fast you would be sweating or looking slightly scrambled. Wait, you're saying if you, guy, did your best to open

a banana as fast as you could that you would break a sweat or be out of breath? If I opened it in less than a second? Absolutely. You offended that guy so much he left. He's like, this is bullshit. That would never happen. I've seen that guy before at Bananas Anonymous.

He has literally never opened a banana without losing a third of it in his life. If I may, Matt, we didn't reveal this. We've met a few times now. We've spent a little bit of time together. And what you don't know about Guy and I, you probably know that we're New Zealanders

and we do podcasts, but we're actually also film executives who are willing to greenlight a project which will catch our fancy. This is fortuitous. So what I would love to try and garner from you is maybe a pitch for a sequel to We Are Your Friends. And Guy and I, as film executives,

will assess whether or not it's worthy of our mighty checkbooks. Okay. He's right, man. Great yes-anding there from Guy Montgomery. What a talented improviser. Join the front row

to take a photo with this disposable camera. Can you imagine what would happen if we gave him a real camera? So when you give a kid a trolley or something and they walk around like You didn't give me this camera. I bought it. imagine what would happen if we gave him a real camera you know so when you give a kid a um i don't know like a trolley or something and they walk around like you didn't give me this camera i bought

it society gave you a toy camera my dude it's because we got to get away i guess i'm doing my best with it i'm sorry man this yeah uh oh yeah we're, by the way. And we want to make a movie real bad, but it's got to be the right movie. And if you get this wrong... I'm done in this town? No, man, but you're going to have to take this down to the pharmacy and get the role developed. And bring it back to me without looking at any of the photos.

Okay. Even though some of them are going to be super interesting, no doubt. My mom has, over her lifetime, taken probably close to a hundred of these things and never, ever developed them. And there's a box of them. And so for every Christmas and for her birthday, I go to the only Walgreens I can find that will do these

and get her a pack that turns out to always be black photos or just thumbs and stuff like that. Hey, that's fucking adorable. Oh, that's cool. All right. Hello, Mr. Gourley. Please come on in. Thank you.

We have an open door policy here. Thank you. I'm a little nervous. Here at Montgomery and Bat Film Funding Industries. Don't be nervous. Smile real quick. It's just for me. Please, have a seat.

Can I just address this to you? Yes. Okay. And me. Can I get you a water? I'm supposed to say yes. It shows that I'm not intimidated. Well done.

You passed the first test. Oh, God. All right. You're not going to drink any of it? no I don't have any water at home so I wanted to keep it for tonight god damn it that is charming

Mr Montgomery quick aside we need to let this motherfucker speak we don't have a lot of time left to conduct our appointments. I want to hear this one out. We haven't greenlit a film in so long. Are you prepared to see what this dude has to say? Yeah, man, but before I do,

I've got a long list of grievances to clear with you. Oh, no. Okay, well, this feels like as good a time as any. Maybe your top three I don't know if I can get it down to three 30, 50 maybe But three? You know what? Forget about it

Let's get back to this guy Mark, is it? What's your pitch? Matt Whatever Throw it at us Go ahead, Mr. Mark. It's Maximum Matt, okay?

Well, here it is, 20 years later. Sorry, 20 years later from now? Yeah, from now. From 2017. From 2015. What are we talking about here? The sequel to We Are Your Friends. Oh, I saw that movie.

Yeah. Yeah. I tell you what. It stays with you, doesn't it? Didn't love it, didn't hate Friends. Oh, I saw that movie. Yeah. Yeah. I tell you what. It stays with you, doesn't it? Didn't love it, didn't hate it. Well, right. But get ready to love it all over again. All right.

But he just said he did neither love it nor hate it. Hold on. Let's hear Mark out. 20 years later. How can someone love something all over again if they never loved it in the first instance? Excuse me? Mr. Mark. How did you get this job?

I don't know. Ah. Quick aside. I really like this guy's moxie. I like to sing about the moon and the june. Calling out the billionaire financiers. Me like him a lot. Right on.

Mark, proceed. Yes. 20 years later Then when? 2035 2055? I was waiting I was waiting for that

You literally saw me at 2035 I'm sorry quick aside Mr Montgomery no shit. We've got to get through this. These insights aren't helping my fruit. Send me a kiss, my one. Baby, my heart's on fire.

Sorry, Mr. Mark. You'll win this time if you refuse me. Honey, you'll lose me and then you'll be left alone. So, baby, telephone and tell me I'm your own. Mr. Mark! Yes me I'm your own. Mr. Max! Yes, I'm back. 20 years later, 2075. Cars run exclusively on rendered down pig tallow.

The barren wastelands of Santa Monica have bled into the ocean, and no one knows sea from land. The buildings have crumbled into what looks like cityscapes of giant tombstones, and mankind itself is questioning its own existence. Global warning, my balls, everything's frozen. That's right, it's not what you expected. We have a flashback to 2015

with Zuculi at Summerfest screaming, things will never get better. The title flashes on the screen. Things have gotten worse. We are no longer your friends because, well, what's his name?

Jughead? Yeah. Jughead? Yeah. Jughead is long since dead. Johnny Depp is running a prison farm. A prison farm? That's right. What hellish future is this? Yes, he's farming prisoners

because the prison industrial complex has been so privatized that they need fuel grist for the mill, so they grow prisoners. I'll be honest, it's better than what I was thinking, which is jails fucking each other and then birthing new jails. There's some of that too. Oh, no! Yes.

Let me finish. These prisoners are genetically bred to commit crimes at the age of three days old. What sort of crimes can a three-day- Baby crimes. That's my waddle. Give it to me. No, I steal your waddle.

Give me your nipple. I take it. Anyway, that's the prologue. Part one. It's more of an overture, you know, like this is a symphony. There are movements, okay? Can I just quickly say, Mr. Mark? Sure, sure.

Gee fucking whiz, you've got me by the bollocks. We're just getting started, Mr. Montgomery. Mr. Bat. Please, call me Mr. Montgomery. Okay, I just did. Mr. Montgomery was my father's name. That's right. You're his son because it's 2075.

I'm pitching this in the future. Or now. Who's to say? Zac Efron hasn't aged a day. His abs are just as painted on and also real too, but they still painted on because that's an ego thing. And now, he's still a DJ, even though that's an ancient art like the Jedi.

It's myth. No one was a DJ. That's not a real thing. It's true, says Han Solo. Who is in this picture? Huh? Han Solo is in this film? I bet he is.

He's pretty expensive, man. On account of him being dead? Well, the character's dead, sure. Harrison Ford is alive in 2075? Oh. I'm sorry, you looked super offended by that. Have you seen Harrison Ford lately? Yeah. Anything's

possible, man. That's right. He's still landing planes and laying Janes. Okay. Now. Nice. Here's what happens. Everybody doesn't believe DJs are a thing. And so in the Bible book of DJs, on Dust Mountain, little baby Jughead from the prison farm

is committing rattle crimes left and right until he digs up the DJ Bible and turns to the book of Thump Thump. And in passage 710, where the house man once did do a rave trip and a baby pacifier and a mad hatter hat gave themselves a trip dance. A trip dance.

The most famous of all the dances. You're not kidding. And the prophets of D. Antwoord and Moby and Skrillex and all that shit come flashing on the screen like some kind of thing you've never seen, you assholes. All of this comes crashing down and people gather at the Mount to see an unaged Zac Efron.

If anything, he's a little younger. Put on a DJ set with a set in. I'll tell you that's not really him. It's him. Okay, cool. He's already signed on. That's the other thing is I've got him. He's attached to this.

Okay? Yeah, that's good news. You want him? Fucking A. You want him? Yes, dude. Then we're getting somewhere now. Shut up.

Zac Efron. Yes. You heard the man. Obviously we want Zac Efron. Shut up. I'll take him away. Don't, Mr. Mark. I'll take him away.

Montgomery, silence. Mark. Please. take him away. Montgomery, silence. Mark. Please. Montgomery is my son's name. Mr. Montgomery is my father's name. You can call me Mr. Montgomery. Page two. He takes all of the house disciples down to the empty pool of Jughead's house,

which is a metaphor for their unfulfilled careers. Then, out of nowhere, a tree branch lowers down and a squirrel comes galloping along it with a little bit of a hat that's flipped up in the front. A little bit

of a hat. A little bit of a hat. Which part? Let me guess. May I? Please. Oh. Hey, I'm looking for a writer like you. You don't need to write for this guy.

You're a fucking billionaire executive. I know, but I want to embellish my creative side. Yeah, ta-ta-ta, ta-ta-ta. Page 29. The rest so far has just been house music. For 28 pages, it's just been house music. You know, that's cheap, huh?

Mm-hmm. What's that? Buying house music? Yeah, it's dirt cheap. It's a good deal for us. Mr. Montgomery, am I saying that right? Mr. Montgomery? Please.

Shut the fuck up! Mark, please continue! Mr. Montgomery was my father's name. Mark was my father's name. You can call me Mr. Montgomery. You can call me Mark. Well, I'm the knife, and also a banana. So, check this out, you city folk.

I'm sharp and full of potassium. Now let's hear the rest of this film. Cut to the ending. It's Dust Mountain and Bible people love house music. So get ready because this is Midnight in the Garden of Dance and Thump. In the Garden of Dance and Thump.

At this point, Zac Efron busts open a chest of references from earlier in the movie. And also his own chest and abs that he uses as a literal washboard to go which he samples on his own space iPhone from the future and pumps it right into a MacBook Pro that's just a glowing briefcase and then thumps out a beat so goddamn good it'll make you want to wish you were thinking about something.

Yes. And then you hear the sound in a high-tech thumping montage of a switchblade opening, a badge pinning, and a podcast ending. Everybody cries and the drip drop of a DJ falling on the pad with a bleep, bleep, bleep takes the people home.

We are still your friends. Credits roll. Can I say, Mr. Mark, I'm sorry, but I do not want to finance your movie. I understand. I'm a misunderstood genius.

Hold on. There are two financiers in the room, and it is going to be a hard pass for me as well. Please see yourself out. The fact that you thought what you just presented was worthy of externalising is one of the most humiliating facts. I'm embarrassed for you and for any generation that comes of you.

So, thanks for nothing. Yeah. And... Fuck you. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you, Mr. Montgomery. I think that was the ending I was searching for.

Mr. Montgomery, it was my father's name. Hear me out. Sex in the City 3. And scene. Matt Gourley, take a fucking bow. That was very good, yeah. My God, truly.

Yeah, take a slouch, man. That'll do. That'll suffice. Amazing. Hey, well, I mean,ouch, man. That'll do. That'll suffice. Amazing. Hey, well, I mean, fuck, man. That's really almost, I just want to make sure, because I wrote down some stuff, you know. Jesus Christ.

Now you're getting to this? Oh, no. I just want to say this. The thing is, is Matt put such a lovely button on. I would love it. I knew, because I'd written down something that I really wanted to say out loud. Guy.

This, I wish, more than anything, would hold true for our podcast. Go ahead. I would love if we accidentally didn't record this episode. Dude, okay. So, here's the thing about that. Wait, there's a thing about that? Hilarious possibility.

But there was a moment at the start when we first came on stage where I was like, you know what I definitely should do? Check the recorder. And I haven't done it yet. And I want you to, I mean... That would be fucking awesome. So, ladies' choice. Would you like me to check it

now or after we end? What would the audience like? They want to know. Because if it's not recorded, then how much better was this show than just before? Special. Special.

Special night together. I got good news and I got bad news. It was just an okay episode. Yeah. But we recorded it! Say something. I thought that this was worthwhile to write down and in retrospect it probably wasn't

but I just want to sing Shania's Twain looks like we made it with the two people I have on stage. Did you just call Shania Twain what I called it? I thought that was Shania's Twain I was trying to say Shania Twain's as the possessive

of the song she wrote but did I accidentally attribute the S to Shania's? say Shania Twain's as the possessive of the song she wrote, but did I accidentally attribute the S to Shania's? Shania's Twain. Which then pluralizes. What is it? It's the same thing as Sigourney's Weaver, man. Attorney's General Sigourney's Weaver, Shania's Twain. Well, that'll do for that note.

You guys ever got a good look at Dwight's yokem? All I know is it looks like we made it. Yeah. Oh, that's tough. Looks like we made it. Look how far we've come, my baby. I'm glad we didn't listen

look at what is the first CD I owned we would be missing they said I'll bet we'll never make it but just look at this is Shania Swain

this is the worst night to end on we go together Just look at it. This is Shania Swain. This is the worst night to end on. We grew together. Still going strong. You're still the one. You're still the one I love. I'm going to record it. To the one that I belong to. You're still the one I want

for life. You're still the one I want to the only one I want to. You're still the one I kiss goodnight. You're still the one Perfect

A perfect end To what has quite literally been The worst experience of my life I mean we shouldn't say anymore Because it's all done Matt Gourley I would like to ask If you have any final words And you don't have to

But I would love if you did I would just honestly say in all sincerity, I am thrilled and honoured to be your last guest on what is obviously a journey that I can't comprehend. And it means a lot to me to be here, and thank you for having me. Oh, trick it once more for Matt Gourley. I say,

the entire time I was watching the movie this evening, I thought to myself, this is how the movie is meant to be experienced. And I don't mean that by saying for the 60th time. I mean, watching it, and this is what I felt watching it with you, is watching it to cure the knowledge

that you will never have to watch it again. We really have to wrap it up. In the spirit of authenticity and whatnot. Go ahead. Okay, good. Got the permission. Oh, it's just an excited point. Yeah, good.

You'd think we'd have this down by now. You really would. Like, wrap it up, baby. I'm ready for you to say whatever. One second. So, hey, listen, the podcast has been an absolute pain in the ass in terms of watching the movie,

but an absolute joy and a privilege to go into battle with you every week for the last almost four years, which is an insane thing to say out loud in retrospect. But Guy Montgomery couldn't imagine a more trustworthy

skilled beautiful combatant to go up against this enemy with. It has allowed us both to facilitate situations where we can meet incredible people like all the people who have turned up in Los Angeles tonight

to an amazing venue, Nerd Melt, which is hosted by such incredible acts and then some schlubs from New Zealand who came here to be performing on the stage with the likes of Matt Gourley for Crying Out Loud. Are you getting emotional, Mr Tim? No. But I will say this.

A piece of shit you've been accused of often and I will confirm that you are a piece of shit. But I may also say that you're A piece of shit you've been accused of often, and I will confirm that you are a piece of shit. But I may also say that you're my piece of shit. I'm nobody's piece of shit, and I love you, Tim Bette. And if I knew you better, Matt, I'd be comfortable saying I love you too. Love you too. You piece of shit.

You're a real donkey dick. So, follow your dreams. You piece of shit. You're a real donkey dick. So, follow your dreams. You can achieve them. I'm living proof. There was a paraphrased Cartman quote, but I think I butchered it. But the point is, keep running. Yeah, keep running. And never stop running.

And that was the end of the worst idea of all time That's it, man. You forget that films are supposed to have a theme. Own each step with Peloton. Thank you. You can work in or bring your classes with you for outdoor runs, walks, and hikes led by expert instructors on the Peloton app. Call yourself a runner. Peloton all-access membership separate. Learn more at onepeloton.ca slash running.