The Worst Idea Of All Time - Friendzone Fifty Six

Episode Date: September 14, 2017

Timbly is gonna need to lay low for a while, he's getting all ready to rob a bank. And Guybo is in Australia among the criminals already, so no need to hide. The boiz are hit with TV recommendations, ...donations and lovely messages of support from the Americans, the kiwis and even the Dutch! Could you believe it? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:24 Peloton all-access membership separate. Learn more at onepeloton.ca slash running. Today. You ready? Okay, let's go. The hunt for the wildest movie of the summer. Everybody run! Ends here.
Starting point is 00:00:39 This is your super friendly and not aggressive reminder to buy tickets immediately. Borderlands, now playing. Well, it's the friend zone with Tim and Guy. Come to the friend zone and have a good time. Yes, it's the friend zone with Tim and Guy. Because making friends is the best idea of all time. Hello and welcome along to the friend zone.
Starting point is 00:01:04 A place where you just get to catch up with your pals. Hello and welcome along to the friend zone a place Where you just get to catch up with your pals you get to say hey Tim. How are you? You know stuff like that. Hey guy I'm good, man. I'm we are seeing each other in the video format. Um, yeah, usually when we're apart It's more like a phone call, but now we're fully embracing the technologies of the day. Yeah, actually, I quite like the setup I've got. I'm talking to you on my phone, my smartphone. So smart.
Starting point is 00:01:33 It's so smart that there's literally a video of you moving around in real time in front of me. And then I've got all of these great letters from our friends up on my computer, which would be off- screen for you, Tim, and obviously off screen for the listener because you can't see any of this. One limitation of podcasts, they are, although I think you can have video podcasts,
Starting point is 00:01:55 but no one does it. Nor would you. Nor McDonald does. Yeah, I think that's different. That's like a TV show that's on the internet that happens to be put out as a podcast no but I listen to that as a podcast there's audio for me
Starting point is 00:02:11 but I know that there's a video of it it's nice to have the option do you feel like you miss out on stuff hearing it because there's a lot of face stuff going on in that Norm Macdonald live show not necessarily I just like a podcast for me
Starting point is 00:02:27 is best consumed when i'm walking yeah that's the that's often i think about the time in the not too distant future we will have like the kind of google glasses or whatever where there'll be screens on our eyes so we can watch videos just as we listen to podcasts at the moment. It's not necessary. Oh, not at all. I'm not saying it's necessary. I'm just saying it's inevitable. It's a bad thing.
Starting point is 00:02:53 It'll be horrible. It'll destroy us, but it will happen. Will we overcook it and then we'll all go back to this time? Do you think this is the golden age for technology right before it becomes too scary right i reckon we've overshot it already i think we've already overcooked it to be honest i'm like i you would have seen i put up on facebook the other day i was like guys
Starting point is 00:03:15 i tell you what i'd be pretty keen to just uh go into the woods for a little while and just unplug what has anyone done it what are their thoughts i mean there's a this there's a lovely little town in the south island of new zealand called littleton which i spent a night in recently and i am itching to just uh just go there for maybe like five days and yeah i'm developing all these plans i'm like oh because there's some emails i've got to keep up with i'll allow myself like 30 minutes a day to check my emails and my facebook messages just to check if there's any kind of virgin bullshit i need to know even that you've got to get rid of that too i got responsibilities mate i got i got to stay on
Starting point is 00:03:56 top of that yeah i'm telling you get rid of all that you've got to get rid of all that go start working on the boats in the port down in littittleton and set sail for lands far away. That's what you got to do, Tim. You got to get your head down. You got to lay low for a while, man. I do have to lay low for a while. That's great because that opens me up to committing a massive crime or just doing something about naughty.
Starting point is 00:04:22 How exciting is that? To commit a massive crime yeah man i don't want to like hurt anyone i want it to be a largely victimless crime but just something that's very illegal stealing from a big corrupt agency or something you know like a like a bank yeah yeah a bank robbery who doesn't love bank robbers uh bank tellers they hate them they're so scared i don't know or do you think bank tellers deep down have respect for bank robbers they're like god damn i wish i had the nerve i've got a theory that most bank robbers were bank tellers and they were casing the joint going like bros this is so much easier than anyone thinks yeah
Starting point is 00:05:03 that's not the stupidest thing you've ever said hey it's just like how volunteer firefighters start all the fires because I've got to stop telling people that I can't even complete this has that been something you've been circulating for a little while
Starting point is 00:05:19 I tell a lot of people that the real arsons of the firefighters they're the ones you gotta look out for I tell a lot of people that the real arsons of the firefighters, they're the ones you've got to look out for. Oh, God. It's not true. Yeah, yeah. Huge shout out to all of the first responders, you know,
Starting point is 00:05:34 listening along to the friend zone. This is a safe place for you as well. But stop lighting fires, you fucks. Okay. I got something for you Tim What have you got for me? It's a message Sent from our friend Shannon
Starting point is 00:05:51 It reads Hello Tim Tam and Guy Guy I just wanted to send a little Hey Shannon What's happening here? I'm not talking Just wanted to send a little note to you two fine boys after sending over a long overdue donation.
Starting point is 00:06:09 I can't think of a more deserving pair. Sacrificing your mental health to the delight of so many for so long. Truly, I can't thank you both enough for the years of entertainment. I'm sad this is ending, but can't wait to see what you do next. You boys have been my shining light through some tough times. Thanks again. And say my name, through some tough times. Thanks again. And say my name, which I already had done, Shannon. Shannon.
Starting point is 00:06:32 Well, thank you so much. What a trait. Yeah, for your message, Shannon. And it's been our pleasure to accompany you through times both good and bad. Yeah, that's what we're here for. Your friends are with you thick and thin and that's why this is the friend zone. To carry around in your pocket, in your ears
Starting point is 00:06:49 or on a speaker or in a car or on a boat in Lyttelton when you're escaping a bank heist that you've just pulled off with a bunch of teller friends and a bunch of arsonist firefighters from the volunteer brigade. And you've got to lay low for a while. You've got to lay low with a while you got to lay low with
Starting point is 00:07:05 your friends still check essential facebook messages and emails not everyone's in that position i'm just saying some people some people need to i don't know if i'm one of them i'm probably not rosie writes to us guy accompanying a sweet $7.26 US dollar donation. Oh, I like how specific that is. Ah, so good. Doesn't it feel good? Timbly Wembley and Guy Guy, I attended your show in Christchurch on Friday and I wanted to say thanks for making the trip to Old Quake City.
Starting point is 00:07:35 I've got a funny feeling I may have read this one. Does this sound familiar to you? If it mentions my mum burning me for my choice in hat, then yes. Look at you reading ahead yep it sure does wow well hello again and I'm sorry to waste everyone's time with that
Starting point is 00:07:56 just edit it out no I refuse Chris writes dear fuckboys have either of you ever seen the television program Orphan Black? It's pretty good. I'd give it a solid B+. But the lead actress, Tatiana...
Starting point is 00:08:14 I've heard Scott Ockerman trip over this name so many times in Comedy Bang Bang when she started coming on. And I waited for the day when someone would send me her name to read aloud for the first time i was going to nail it and impress everyone and i've stumbled tatiana miss uh miss lani is a goddamn legend and from what i understand a real joy to work with she plays like six characters and it's pretty dope plus the show is five seasons with 10 hour long episodes which is perfect for a drama, in my opinion.
Starting point is 00:08:45 A real wham bam. Thank you, ma'am. So don't feel like you've entered a long-term relationship when you start the first episode. Looking at you, mad men. Kisses and wishes, Christopher Metzger. That's all he said to us, Chris. It's a guy.
Starting point is 00:08:58 That's from Chris. He's just sent us a recommendation. I love that. I haven't watched Orphan Black. I started watching it. I kind of fell off it a little bit, unfortunately, because I think I got coaxed in by the second season of Narcos. I should return to it.
Starting point is 00:09:16 It's bloody good. And that Tatiana, I tell you what, not only is she an incredibly talented actor, but by a crikey, I've heard her a few um comedy bang bangs and she is tremendously funny that's always good good to me i love to laugh so i don't know what to tell you i i should check out those episodes of comedy bang bang that's just unique to me this is this is the worst idea giving cbb that classic CBB bump. Yeah, I can't wait to see those numbers soar. You're welcome, Mr. Ockerman.
Starting point is 00:09:48 Ahoy, hoy, man with the golden guy, and tomorrow never Wimbleys. Ah, a James Bond doubleheader. That's great. That's right up your street. Just a quick message this time. On the off chance you haven't been alerted to the fact that the new season of Bojack Horseman
Starting point is 00:10:06 Ah there you go Almost immediately references a mythical sequel Paul Blart 3 Till Death Do Us Blart It's a good thing someone's messaged us this Because we got a flurry of messages As I'm sure the Mbim Bam Boys did Whether you get a kick out of the coincidence Or decide on forming a multi-podcast class action lawsuit
Starting point is 00:10:24 Against Netflix for the Dane Cook-esque joke theft is up to you. I trust you'll make the right choice. Yvonne Etniage Guy Incognito. That's an old Simpsons reference.
Starting point is 00:10:37 Yvonne Etniage Join the Navy. Woosh. Over my head, mate. No, it's when Bart forms a boy band and they sing a song which is secretly
Starting point is 00:10:47 propaganda for the navy and the chorus is these women singing join the navy backwards even at niaj oh look anyway that's a deep cut
Starting point is 00:10:58 yeah it is alright well to you Guy Incognito I say this we have been alerted to the fact that it happened I think Tim you even uh
Starting point is 00:11:05 made mention of it on your twitter to say i did it's flattery uh so originally i thought it was um a simple coincidence parallel thinking that the podcast called till death do us blart which we do with the mbembe boys um was was mentioned but then uh it's sort of i don't think anyone's at the bottom of it yet but apparently someone on the writing staff listens to my brother my brother and me on bojack horseman so it seems like it was a lovely intentional shout out which is just amazing isn't it that is incredible even even if we are merely incidental to the shout out. I wear that as truly a badge of honor. 100%. It makes me feel all warm and so on.
Starting point is 00:11:49 Things like that. That's an indelible mark on an incredible piece of art that's out there now. And that's there for keeps. They can't take that away from us, guys. Absolutely. Try as they might. When we come out as being bad bank heisters. You.
Starting point is 00:12:06 Bad robbers. They can't take it back. Yeah, man. Ice Shotgun, that entire season of BoJack in two days. Did you? Yeah. Oh, my God. It's good stuff.
Starting point is 00:12:17 Yeah. Any other further take than that? It's good stuff. Oh, it's good stuff, man. God, I don't think there are many other shows on tv who have got that much on their plate constantly and are like executing 95 of the time it's awesome yeah i i i mean i i don't like talking about very specific things that have just come out because it dates this podcast horribly but friendzone it's all right but my goodness that most recent episode of rick and morty is one of the most densely packed
Starting point is 00:12:50 oh shitly written pieces of tv i've ever seen i haven't uh i'm gonna watch that as soon as we stop talking i haven't i haven't enjoyed that yet oh boy you are in for a treat okay patrick writes to us hey tim firstly sorry for the weird email my name is patrick i flew out to new zealand from the states on business and was supposed to be at your show tonight but because i didn't set the time zone on my phone properly the show had ended by the time i arrived for it oh my god this is devastating holy shit you can't say this but guy is aghast i'm a huge fan of yours and Guy's work, and I'm really fucking bummed I screwed up on the one change of...
Starting point is 00:13:29 Oh, sorry, Chance, I've got to see your show after listening for so many years. I have to go out to Wellington to do some shitty... to do some shit until the 30th, and often the off chance you'll are interested, I'd be thrilled to pick up the tab at a restaurant or bar of your choosing. Oh, no. Seriously, anything seriously anything expense account's fucking awesome if not no worries i'll end up sending over some some form of payment over paypal as soon as i get back to the states cheers patrick
Starting point is 00:13:54 oh god what was the date of that i i don't want to tell you but i will 25th of august and we're recording this on the 14th of september so that is yeah that navy boat has set sail yeah that one really uh slipped through the cracks that bank's been robbed i'm so sorry patrick he says uh postscript i swear i'm not nuts or anything here's a picture of me and my kid to make it seem a little more normal i am just bored and bummed i missed the show here guy i'll just give you that vision oh yeah a lovely fella patrick did you say patrick yeah well you can pull the wool over my co-host size patrick but i see straight through that crazy maniacal glare and you sir are a fucking loon um pat i've got nothing but respect and love for you man and you seem just like a fabulous
Starting point is 00:14:47 you say you've got nothing but respect and love for patrick and then you ignore his his messages as christ for help by three weeks i'm really sorry as though to taunt him i got one for you here we've got a flawed system before you go on guy what happens is if i say something that smells like frenzo material i put a star next to it and then i i just kind of move forward in my email inbox we need yeah it's not a good system yeah there's no uh no you're right it's really bad the system whatever works or almost works what do do they say? Close enough is good enough. Dearest Tiki Tiki Timbo and Guy Clops, I've been an avid listener since season one and you boys have not disappointed one bit.
Starting point is 00:15:35 My dream is to become a therapist and de-stigmatize mental illness. And I recently took a major step towards the goal and completed a master's in social work. Congratulations, Steve. Nice one. The degree took me four long years as I was working full-time, taking classes part-time, and doing internships, all which felt like it was slowly killing me.
Starting point is 00:15:54 But you boys helped me get through it. Truly, towards the end this past May, I kept thinking to myself that I'd be done with graduate school before you're done hanging with the fuckboys of We Are Your Friends. That did wonders for my morale. In addition to a donation, I'd also like to give you a farewell gift of what I can only imagine is a picture of who Zuccoli became after the end of We Are Your Friends. Or as I've just realized, this came out in 2012. Maybe it's what the OG fuckboy was up to before James Reed discovered him. Regardless, this link includes all of Zac Efron's scenes. In a movie called Liberal Arts.
Starting point is 00:16:29 Ziccoli's eight collective minutes in this movie. Is truly it's shining light. With lines like. Alcohol is for suckers. And what are your thoughts on crop circles. Skip to 507 if you want to get straight to the weird stuff. Stay sweet. And say my name.
Starting point is 00:16:42 Katrin. And as promised. There's a YouTube link to Zac Efron's liberal arts scenes as Nat. Sorry, was that Caitrin? Was that the name? Caitrin. Yeah, it's spelt like Caitlin, only if you can imagine instead of an L, if someone took the top of a little L
Starting point is 00:17:00 and they rolled it round halfway down to make an R. I see what you're saying so the first half of it that vertical stick still there but then when you get to the midway point there's sort of a bend in that L. Yeah if you think of a baby L as an entirely erect penis
Starting point is 00:17:17 and an R as sort of a turgid post coital schlong I see yeah then you've more or less figured out how to say katrin's name turgid is not an adjective i hear nearly enough in my everyday lexicon man i've been trying to figure out a joke that i can insert the word turgid into because it is such a good it's just one of those words that's class you know it's very good real five dollar word that one oh yeah that hey great choice on your life decisions that you've made and um what an amazing effort
Starting point is 00:17:53 getting through all the the night classes and uh um internship what do you call it not internships the you know the going and the doing of the thing. What does she call it? Interning? Nah, what's it called when you're kind of intern but you don't get paid? Interning. That's the suggestion I got from her. I thought internships were usually paid. Nah, man. Today. You ready? Okay, let's go. The hunt for the wildest movie of the summer.
Starting point is 00:18:26 Everybody run! Ends here. This is your super friendly and not aggressive reminder to buy tickets immediately. Borderlands, now playing. It's weird. Internships, they're barely ever paid. Especially in the States, they go, All right, you're going to do all of our grunt work for three months,
Starting point is 00:18:46 and we won't pay you a dime. And afterwards, you might get a minimum wage job with us. And everyone goes, that sounds great. A media company? Oh, my gosh. I'm going to be the coolest kid in town. And they go to the bar, and they go, I'll take a Manhattan. And the bartender serves them up a Manhattan, and they say, that'll be $17.
Starting point is 00:19:03 They go, oh, I'm really blowing it here. I've got no money because I'm an intern. And then they wind up scrubbing dishes out the back for three long years. And they get fired from their internship. But they work their way up the food chain at the local eatery. You know, they go from dish scrubber to front of house to maitre d'. Before you know it, they're a minor stakeholder. They've got a 5% stake in this mom and pop bistro.
Starting point is 00:19:30 And they're like, God damn, seven years ago, I wanted to be a journalist. Look at me now. And then they save up all their money and they sell their share and they pursue journalism. But the world's gone by too fast. They can't catch up anymore. So they're just out there alone on the street with their, you know, what they have left
Starting point is 00:19:47 of their savings. It's a hard life. Jessica K. Jessica K. I'm nothing but impressed. Jessica K. sent us 20 bucks US. There's no message on there
Starting point is 00:20:03 and I'm not sure if there was supposed to be but thank you so much, Jessica. And then that's followed up with a message from Annie. Do you know what? Jessica K, we would have read her message already in the friends. I see it's got a Facebook message here.
Starting point is 00:20:15 That is fucking excellent news. Yeah. Will, do you want to partner it up now? No, no, we've already read it. Brilliant. That's one of the flaws in the system any rights dear spindly timbly and real piece of shit guy montgomery i wanted to drop you both a line and say thank you for wrecking your sanity in the name of entertainment as a uni
Starting point is 00:20:36 student procrastinating a bit too much i look forward to driving into uni and listening to my brave boys battle through we are your friends week after Also, I was lucky enough to see both of your respective live shows in the Auckland Comedy Festival this year and the live recording of Worst Idea with a couple of friends, and we all loved every minute. I've also been dipping my toes into other Little Empire podcasts and have been watching Fail Army and Banter since they came on TV. Holy shit.
Starting point is 00:21:01 I can't wait to see what projects you come up with next. But until then then good luck with your final watches also out of curiosity guy what would your 53rd best life experience be if this does make it to the friend zone feel free to use my name that's from annie smith from new zealand wow annie smith thank you so much um My 53rd best life experience? Well, you know, life is a book that is still being written. So who's to say? I got those top 52 pretty locked and loaded,
Starting point is 00:21:37 but I've never really had to think so far outside of that experience. I hear you. I've just got here, so you you know a few more messages tim from some uh legendary fans communicating all sorts of different takes on the bojack horseman uh intersection pop culture some saying congratulations some saying your boys have been ripped off um all of them saying we're watching bojack horseman and we're listening to you guys i guess in a way do you know what though guy i'm happy to be had in whatever way oh yeah hey i oh oh um i want to jump in because i don't know how much longer we'll go for but um i tell you what i'm
Starting point is 00:22:17 swimming in emails over here i could go all bloody day and night yeah but um i got a couple of messages and this came through twitter as well of uh people calling out my absolute nonsense in the last episode of the podcast being very disrespectful to the trans community by engaging in dead naming when i was uh talking about the wachowskis while recounting uh random rumors i'd heard on the internet about the uh the making of the matrix sequels and i'd just like to take this opportunity to say I apologise profusely for that and any offence caused. Last thing, I will speak for Guy,
Starting point is 00:22:54 last thing either of us would ever want to do and it won't happen again. So thank you to those people who called me to account for that. This man will be trying harder. It's a good, they call that a learning moment tim and you in spite of the fact that you're thick as shit appear to be willing to learn which i love you've never let the fact that you're slow get in the way of you attempting to wrap your head around things and a lot of a lot of less driven people would have but not you would you like a message from rob would i yes came 13 days ago to the day great hey guy and tim i started listening to you
Starting point is 00:23:39 and the mackleroy brothers with episode two of till death do us blart on a road trip from new jersey to florida and. I started in the middle of season 3 and recently decided to go back to the beginning, bringing through the series while at work. Oh, binging, sorry. If my co-workers didn't think I was crazy before, my bursts of laughter in a room by myself have most certainly raised some flags.
Starting point is 00:23:58 During my joyous time overcoming the mundane, I came across watching you guys spoke about that might shed oh, watching you guys spoke about that might shed, oh something you guys spoke about that might shed some light. Episode 15 of season 2, you boys talked about the music of Sex and the City 2 and how Mattress Pikelet King possibly produced it on a MacBook Pro. Out of curiosity, I looked up the Sex and the City MacBook to see what comes up apparently carrie used a macbook pro throughout the tv series when writing it was used as a promotion to quote see what's inside her laptop
Starting point is 00:24:32 for the first movie though the site is unfortunately down which is a real shame oh sorry there used to be a promotion i'm just making up words No you're doing okay It was used as a promotion To quote see what's inside Unquote her laptop for the first movie I cannot attest to seeing the movie So my information is scarce But supposedly there was no presence of a MacBook Pro Through the second film
Starting point is 00:24:57 Mostly due to their HP brand deal That's Hewlett Packard For those of you who aren't total fucking nerds Like me Not the source Which explains some of the money that's that's hewlett packard for those of you who aren't total fucking nerds like me yeah not the source which explains some of the money hp brown sauce she had to ditch it found in the second apartment that carrie rented out because of the poor housing market and just couldn't be uh bothered to take anything out the macbook pro was donated and sold disappearing from the city and never to
Starting point is 00:25:24 be seen there again. It's quite possible that James Reid of the Feelers could have found Carrie's old MacBook Pro, read through it, and couldn't bear to have it to have it so he gave it away. Anyway, thanks for your entertainment, good luck in the future endeavors, and I hope you guys get together
Starting point is 00:25:39 for another project less excruciating on your psyche. Say my name, say my name, Rob Carhill. P.S. I've been saying Rayleigh like Ray Lay. It's similar to how to say my name, Cahill. So screw anyone whinging about pronunciation. Man, I think I'm saying it vastly different to how he's intending me to.
Starting point is 00:26:01 Because those didn't rhyme at all when I said them. You did great. Thank you very much for that message, Rob i'd never thought that uh the macbook pro that carrie had to stop using due to promotional reasons could have wound up in uh james reed's hands i mean that's beautiful isn't it what a neat circle that's formed yeah yeah that is neat so thank you very much for that um here we go this is a link to an article saying 25th hour is still the best movie about 9-11 so that sounds dense but there's a there's a quote at the start of it uh which says in an article about films related to 9-11 uh hey press pause for a second because this could well and you'd be within your rights for that to be interpreted
Starting point is 00:26:46 As highly disrespectful That is just such a surprising message for someone to send us I was very caught off guard by that Oh no, absolutely Please read on And I have not distributed the information In a very tactful way So you're right to press pause on that
Starting point is 00:27:02 But it's from The Ringer Which is like a pop culture website And the quote is Even the globalism porn of Sex and the City 2 So you're right to press pause on that. But it's from The Ringer, which is like a pop culture website. And the quote is, even the globalism porn of Sex and the City 2 with its awkward tour of the Middle East feels like a fantasy that only the 21st century conflicts born of that day in 2001 make possible.
Starting point is 00:27:21 What do you think, Tim? Is the tour of the Middle East and Sex and the city 2 enabled by the tragedy of 9-11 absolutely not i no i cannot endorse that hot take from the ringer okay well i i kind of think the contrary it's so um there is such an exclusion of what's happening in global events from the from the gals that it's like it's the opposite yeah it's like no it's like sex in the city 2 happens in a world where 9-11 didn't happen yeah i can that's the universe they've built i can uh understand that how did sex in the city deal with 9-11 were they on the air at that time? I don't know. How did friends deal with it? Friends?
Starting point is 00:28:08 Yeah, they must have been on the air, right? Who knows? Hey, Sex and the City was too. Wow. Anyway. Ain't that something? Do you want to go? Have you got an email?
Starting point is 00:28:23 Oh, is it me? Yeah, I've got more. Oh, mate. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah've got more. Oh, mate, sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know how this works, guy. I've got this, all right? Just have a little faith in me for a goddamn second, if you please.
Starting point is 00:28:35 Okay, I'm struggling. All right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dear Pidgeotim and Gyarados. Pokemon. Long time listener. First time emailer. Fuck. I have a worrying...
Starting point is 00:28:50 Gyarados. Man. Yeah. That motherfucker stopped me from getting through Lance so many times. Did Lance have a Gyarados? Yeah, he was a dragon guy. And all of your Pokemon would be so fucking depleted By the time you got to him And the Elite Four or whatever they called themselves
Starting point is 00:29:08 Would have a garbage name Was he the last one? Yeah you take out like a Dragonite And something else and then he's like boom I got three Gyarados Level 60 You know Let's see how you go and every time
Starting point is 00:29:23 I would lose Truly a great adventure that game Really was The first ones You know, let's see how you go. And every time I would lose. Truly a great adventure, that game. Really was. The first ones. Yeah. The new ones were a bit complex for me. Brace yourselves.
Starting point is 00:29:37 I have a worrying thought that could send you each into a deep well of despair. Your goal at the worst idea of all time is and has been to watch the same movie in its entirety once a week for a year. Or rather, 52 times anyway. Sure, you're familiar with Sandler's team's hijinks, the girls' wanderings in the desert, and the fuckboys' fuckery, but what have you missed in these movies? The average human blinks two points... Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Every two to ten... Who are you? Reveal yourself. The average human blinks every two to ten seconds. Who are you? Reveal yourself. The average human blinks every two to ten seconds or if focused three to four times a minute, the average blink takes around one third of a second, approximately eight frames in a 24 frame per second movie. Assuming the two of you are focused on the movie per watch, approximately 118 total seconds are missed
Starting point is 00:30:24 during blinking in Gr-ups to 170 seconds in sex in the city 2 and 112 seconds and we are your friends that's a little under two percent of each movie missed due to our human weakness of blinking and that's if and that's if you're focused what are the odds you've blinked at the exact same moment in each of your 52 watches and hence missed that frame of the movie across all 52 watches a truly chilling thought anyway love the podcast has given me uh sorry has me grinning like a madman while cycling on my commute in the netherlands happy to chuck your monthly patreon money at you you deserve it looking forward to your escape from the self-imposed torture into your future perspective or combined projects please say my name for fame sam sargent sam
Starting point is 00:31:13 sargent sargent s-a-r-j-a-n-t sargent well you don't pronounce sam sergent I'll tell you this Hey wait maybe the J Wait hold on If he's Dutch Maybe the J's soft as well Yeah All those Dutch J's are wimps Not like a hard
Starting point is 00:31:35 Sargent You know Antipodean J's Wouldn't want to come across them in a dark alley No sirro Aye man I tell you what I love that you've done the maths
Starting point is 00:31:44 I think If I was in tell you what I love that you've done the maths I think yeah if I was in your situation and I felt like poking holes and in the podcast I would absolutely embrace that decision and do what you did but with all due respect Sam go fuck yourself I have seen every frame every corner of every frame of every one of these movies and I refuse to entertain the notion through human error that I've missed anything well
Starting point is 00:32:12 there's a lot of emails left but I'm going to save them for another day and I think all that blinking math is just frankly blinking awesome of you to get in touch with us about
Starting point is 00:32:22 blinkingly great hey look I've got one more that i'm going to read out before we go i would love for that to happen yeah dear boys you two are kind boys and you are good boys i'd like to tell you in the friend zone the story of how you brought two friends of friends together through the power of the potty it was early august and i was at the pub watching the footy with friends and their friends. Bears were drunk, goals were kicked, and my ears pricked up when I heard a gender-cross-the-table proclaim,
Starting point is 00:32:51 for a kiss. A kiss, as always, causing me to stop mid-sentence and yell, A GIFT! After I watched this young lad's face turn from confusion to delight, we started having a bit of a yarn. Well, that yarn's been going for a while now and it's a bloody good one he's way behind in the potty so i won't hear this for ages but i hope we're still together when he does so i wish to thank you timbo and gogo for the wonderful things you say and do and for getting me some of that box office gold yours sincerely steph p.s also congrats on surviving all four directors commentaries. That sounded fucking rough. An accurate assessment of how that day went, Steph.
Starting point is 00:33:32 And secondly, so these two are like, they're seeing each other, huh? In a romantic sense? Yeah, yeah. So I would say. That's the implication, isn't it? That's what I interpreted, absolutely. Oh my God, that warms the cockles of my heart. Yes!
Starting point is 00:33:46 And if anyone's had a worst idea baby yet, they need to get in touch. Because I tell you what, the heady heights of being mentioned through a project we've done on Bojack Horseman is huge. And my life will be complete if I know that two people got together somehow through our podcast and then have created new life. I will die a happy man knowing that thing has happened. Undoubtedly. Maybe it could be you, Steph. Maybe it's time to get...
Starting point is 00:34:16 Well, let's not put too much pressure on Steph. Maybe. Unsheath that box office gold and accept some of that molten gold, I don't know we should really bail out on this one, well it's been a pleasure to see you Tim and you kind listener
Starting point is 00:34:32 yeah thank you so much for listening and Guy it's really lovely to see you in your pink sweater and that hat that I got you from Japan, I love that you've taken to that cat, I'm getting a lot of compliments on this cat. For those who can't see it, which is everyone,
Starting point is 00:34:49 it's a baby blue and it's got a cartoon peach right in the mid. Hey, Tim, when's this Friends Zone going to be released? I'd say probably today. Hey, that's great news. In which instance, I would like to say this.
Starting point is 00:35:02 If you are listening in Sydney, this coming Mondayay september 18th uh i'll be doing a work in progress show at giant dwarf in sydney it's only ten dollars and uh it's just jokes that i've been doing for the last few months it's gonna be a great show i can't wait to do it uh and if you're listening i'd love to see that and if you are in new zealand why not tune into Banter, the TV show I host, on the election special,
Starting point is 00:35:29 it's second to last episode, probably ever, which is on Wednesday at 9.30, on the TV channel they call Juke, absolutely, and last time I will ever mention it, good job, I'll be on that episode,
Starting point is 00:35:42 oh yeah, you will too, yeah, that's going to be dynamite, guy's going to be doing you will too. Yeah, that's going to be dynamite. Guy's going to be doing some turtle wrangling. It's going to be great. Darn tootin'. Okay. Okay.
Starting point is 00:35:50 Bye, everybody. Love to you, our friends. Well, it's the friend zone with Tim and Guy. Come to the friend zone and have a good time. Yes, it's the friend zone with Tim and Guy. Because making friends is the best idea of all time today you ready okay let's go the hunt for the wildest movie of the summer ends here this is your super friendly and not aggressive reminder to buy tickets immediately
Starting point is 00:36:22 borderlands now playing

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