The Worst Idea Of All Time - Replay S01E02: Ballet

Episode Date: February 9, 2024

Please enjoy this victory lap of Season One episodes as we celebrate 10 years of The Worst Idea of All Time. Join us for our 10 year anniversary show on Feb. 10 (NZT) live and live-streaming via worst...ideaofalltime.com.Original Episode Description: A discussion on the talented Jon Lovitz and his role in the film, the strange ballet recital scene and the best analogy for this film. Also, a revelation that this entire podcast is simply a ploy by Guy for his own gain.Soundwise, we're sounding echo-y as all hell but at least you can hear us both this week. Better next week, promise. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, it's the present day and you're with Guy Montgomery, who, funnily enough, has just spent some time with Guy Montgomery and Tim Batt from a decade ago. Just for the first time since laying down the tracks, I've just listened back to some of the original season of The Worst Idea of All Time, or as we call it uh you know cycle through different iterations of that title in the show the worst idea in the world or the worst idea ever and i've got to say it was a like there's a fascinating sort of palpable nostalgia kick to going back there uh just me into i can really visualize where we were we were on a couch at Tim's flat at the Wilton. We were up the stairs in the lounge sharing one Yeti microphone
Starting point is 00:00:53 with some air cartons around it. And, you know, initially at least, I'd say celebrating grown-ups too, our second episode of of the podcast um quite interesting to listen back to sort of early uh rhythms and dynamics i'm very open about the fact i'm using you know what we're doing as a means of becoming better friends with tim rather than for the sake of creating a podcast we are joined by you know scores of cicadas in the background and um we're really getting to know each other and i suppose the form it's uh it's not tim wants to talk about it's you know like stuff that i remember now and experience today i'm hearing
Starting point is 00:01:42 back for the first time tim wants to talk about the movie. Guy doesn't. We're both celebrating John Lovett while also acknowledging his character is somewhat of a sexual deviant. It's sort of, yeah. I'm really excited to go on this journey for the season to be guiding you through the evens and just to hear what the hell Tim and I got up to
Starting point is 00:02:08 and how it led us to here. There's a lot of sort of early, rather, sorry, conspiratorial rumblings throughout the episode. We broach Kmart's prominent role in the film. Tim, as is his want, his inquisitive and intelligent mind wants to understand the economics of the town and grown-ups too we get into an argument about the relative merits of
Starting point is 00:02:32 adam sandler's character as a father figure uh it's it's and we highlight a lot of laughs and genuine laughs we we already god knows that we don't know what lies in front of us we already discussed the experience of losing perspective i mean these are just two young boys with no idea what's in front of them tim sounds genuinely quite upset to be doing it and i seem to be really excited um and it's just fascinating to think that there's more to come. So I think you're going to have a really good time. I hope you enjoy it. Even though it's an old project,
Starting point is 00:03:12 there's no real trigger warnings here, I don't think. I just think it's an interesting case study in the past. Welcome to the Worst Idea of All Time podcast. Hello you, thanks for stopping by. My name's Guy Montgomery. And I'm Tim Batt. And Worst Idea Ever involves us watching Grown Ups 2 once a week and talking about it. So this is the second time we've seen it. This is our second watch, episode 2. And holy shit, kill us, episode 2 and holy shit
Starting point is 00:03:45 kill us now, no, holy shit it gets better, I think just right off the bat I'm going to tell you this Tim, I think I enjoyed it more this week than I did last week, I'm with you on that actually you miss stuff in the first watch, well this comes across as being a brainless, this is a movie
Starting point is 00:04:02 packed front to back with gags on gags and there's a lot of slow burning jokes a lot of thinkers which you won't necessarily get on the first
Starting point is 00:04:09 watch that's true the other thing I think is that I I know what's coming now there are markers it's like the
Starting point is 00:04:17 second marathon you've ever run and you know your body's telling you when you hit that 25k mark that 30k mark I would use a different analogy the analogy I would use is it's like your second tour of you when you hit that 25k mark, that 30k mark I would use a different analogy, the analogy I would use
Starting point is 00:04:26 is it's like your second tour of war when you have to go back to Iraq and you're like okay I'm aware some horrific shit is going to happen I'm aware I'm going to lose some men along the way and I'm going to feel things that no ordinary man should feel but I'm prepared and the other thing in knowing what's happening
Starting point is 00:04:42 and what is to come is that there are moments genuinely there were moments when I was enjoying myself today. Yeah, same. There were moments where I entered delirium and I laughed. Like I laughed at gags that the script writers had written to be laughed at. Should we start by going through some of those ones that really, I think both of us got caught quite off guard by how funny some of these gigs were. The first part which was like, yes please, was, I don't remember what order it happens in, but John Levitt's coming in. It's Levitt's man, we do this every week because now's the second week and he did it again.
Starting point is 00:05:22 Yeah, he comes in. Let's say it with me just real quick love it love it there we go love it love it love it yeah i love it i love it when you correct me uh he comes in i can't even remember if we explained this last week but it's just hilarious he's this really creepy janitor and he pretends to be a yoga instructor and he makes all these women do these things like bend over and slap themselves on the bottom and also jiggle, like just jiggle, just face him and jiggle.
Starting point is 00:05:49 John Lovitz you might know as being, he's in Friends, he's like, he does a cameo in Friends, which is what I think a lot of people who are around our age will know him from. He was also- He's Monica's like food reviewer who gets really stoned
Starting point is 00:06:01 and he's in The Simpsons as well. Yeah, he's in The Simpsons as the- As the film reviewer. Yeah. And he's actually, I thinkons as well yeah he's in The Simpsons as the film reviewer yeah and he's he's actually I think even in his bio I read once
Starting point is 00:06:08 ages ago that like he's perpetually the reviewer that's his character that's his his piece that he adds to any enterprise they really wrote him
Starting point is 00:06:15 a gem of a piece in this script because he's not a reviewer he's just some weird guy who shows up twice once and he's actually the only character
Starting point is 00:06:24 now I think about it, who doesn't get invited to Adam Sandler's big party That's a good point, because there's approximately 45 to 50 thousand people at the party in the end, and John Lovitz is nowhere to be seen. Well even if he was, he was off camera, but you'd think he would have been causing some sort of mischief. The second thing you get to see from John
Starting point is 00:06:40 Lovitz is uh... I like that you looked to me for approval Is that how you pronounce his name yes it is I did look to you for approval so you'll stop correcting me
Starting point is 00:06:48 uh he's they're watching a kids ballet recital and the ballet teacher is really attractive and he's standing up above the lighting rig
Starting point is 00:06:55 just watching with binoculars with binoculars it's a really untoward scene actually watching the instructor going I'm having a
Starting point is 00:07:03 wonderful time his delivery of that line is like one of the greatest moments on film in the history of human cinema see and this is
Starting point is 00:07:12 what worries me is you've lost you've already you've lost perspective I haven't man you've forgotten what a movie is you go back
Starting point is 00:07:18 and you look at that little segment of the film and you tell me I'll do it next week you tell me that isn't the best delivered line I'm not doing any pro bono work on this movie I'm not going to watch it in my spare time at that little segment of the film and you tell me I'll do it next week you tell me that isn't the best to live in life
Starting point is 00:07:25 I'm not doing any pro bono work on this movie I'm not going to watch it in my spare time so that was probably the first that was a two part but still funny but in the ballet recital he has a couple of absolute pillars and I can't imagine that Adam Sandler or the other dude who wrote this, I think it was three
Starting point is 00:07:41 guys, thought of these lines they must have been from John Lovett. He says, I'll go out of order, but he says, you're all prostitutes. When he gets found out, he promptly leaves the room.
Starting point is 00:07:53 He just shouts that out to all the women at the yoga club. Do you think he was just shooting on the lot next to the movie and just swanned in and just threw out a couple of ad-libs? You're all prostitutes. Just sort of for a laugh.
Starting point is 00:08:02 There's no way they'll use this stuff. And then the editor was like that's gold that's pure love it's gold what was the other one that he says before that when he's in the yoga room
Starting point is 00:08:11 uh I don't know it was really good there's another really good line it's not important you know what is important we'll get it next week
Starting point is 00:08:19 while I think of it yeah because we're just going to keep adding to this list that doesn't get resolved did you remember what that movie was that you were talking about in episode one that you saw and walked out of that was no I didn't walk think of it, yeah, because we're just going to keep adding to this list that doesn't get resolved. Did you remember what that movie was that you were talking about in episode one? Oh, yes.
Starting point is 00:08:27 That you saw and walked out of? No, I didn't walk out of it. I walked home and reviewed it. It was I Love You, Beth Cooper. Did you ever see it? No, but I've heard of it. And it starred Hayden Panettiere. Am I saying that correctly, Mr. Pronunciation?
Starting point is 00:08:39 I think so. I believe that's correct. Yeah, no, that movie, I mean, that's probably... Pronunciation. Don't be so patronising. Patronising. believe that's correct uh yeah no that's that movie i mean that's probably pronunciation don't be so patronizing patronizing uh that movie is in the same same ballpark as this movie in terms of terrible just terribleness the other funny gags uh and david spade's son yeah he first meets david spade he's got a crudely drawn stick figure with a the word him and an arrow pointing at it and he holds it up next to David Spade
Starting point is 00:09:05 as if he's checking cross-referencing the picture. So this is David Spade's kid who has never met his father and obviously you would carry a photo or a likeness around so you can ID
Starting point is 00:09:15 who your dad is and as a guy he's got a crudely drawn stick figure wearing a hat. And that's actually I mean you could probably put that gag into
Starting point is 00:09:22 sort of any primetime sitcom and it would hold I think. Yeah. Maybe. Well I've got the feeling that's not the first time You could probably put that gag into any primetime sitcom, and it would hold, I think. Well, I've got the feeling that's not the first time they've used that gag, to be honest with you, Monty. I reckon that David Spade's probably shoehorned that into a few episodes of the shows he's done. Just Shoot Me, and then House of...
Starting point is 00:09:38 No, what was the one he did? He was in it after John Ritter died. Oh, Eight Simple Rules. Eight Simple Rules for dating my teenage daughter. Yeah. The other funny moments, just while I can remember them, the bus driver guy,
Starting point is 00:09:53 I can't remember who he is, he's sort of a character. I'm starting to get the character names now. His name is Nick. That'll be when we know we're too far gone, when we start referring to the characters as their actual names rather than the actors. But he does a poos in a Kmart toilet. And when he's doing the poos,
Starting point is 00:10:10 he yells out, what is it? Get out of here! Get out of me! And that's funny. And also, while we're talking about the Kmart part, there's like half an hour of the movie
Starting point is 00:10:19 is set in a Kmart. Yeah, we need to... There's logos everywhere. We need to delve into this. Adam Sandler references Kmart outside of Kmart, either side of the scene. Kmart definitely bankrolled part of this film.
Starting point is 00:10:30 It was absolutely promotional considerations given to the shithole that is Kmart. This film had a budget of $80 million and a cast of approximately half of 1 million people. So someone's paying for that. Did that actually have a budget of $80 million? Yeah, and it made $230 million, I think, internationally at the box office. $230 million?
Starting point is 00:10:48 Yeah, yeah. So it made its money back. And then some. Yeah, but it's like, with a movie like that, it's actually really hard to lose money when you have that many big-name stars in it, because they do all this crazy accounting and shit. It's like a drug ring, man.
Starting point is 00:11:02 So, I mean, you think that this is a movie that was written to a formula. This is a movie that they're making, and they, I mean, it's like a drug ring so this i mean you think that this is a movie that was written to a formula this is a this is a movie that they're making and they i mean it's but it seems like they've missed it i'm no film buff guy montgomery but it seems like they've missed all the classic beats of any particular genre that's not important because if it may well it is important obviously in terms of making a movie but as far as measuring success in Hollywood goes, you make almost three times your budget, surely that's a success. Yeah but by that yardstick wouldn't everyone just be doing porn?
Starting point is 00:11:32 Some hikes in this film, you know what will get her a lot of money and financially successful? Pornography would man. That's too great a leap, I'm just saying who are the people who are going out and spending their hard earned, obviously we bought a copy legally from iTunes but like how do they know that this many people are going out and spending their hard-earned... Obviously, we bought a copy legally from iTunes. But how do they know that this many people are going to see this terrible, terrible movie?
Starting point is 00:11:50 Because when you pack it out with this many known commodities, and holy fuck, the cast in this movie rivals... It is loaded. Like, the Hobbit. Ocean's Eleven. Yeah. Oh, that's true. The primary cast is huge.
Starting point is 00:12:03 But also, just the secondary revolving cast is huge but also just the secondary revolving cast of characters that they just there's a thing that happens in this movie where if a scene's not working
Starting point is 00:12:11 they just insert 30 more people into the scene and you don't have to see those people again it's just for that specific scene it's fucking nuts
Starting point is 00:12:19 but anyway you had an original question I can't remember what it was about financial success in Hollywood the point being if you have so many people like David Spade and Chris Rock and Kevin James, you kind of can't lose.
Starting point is 00:12:31 It's really hard to lose money. Because people will go and see it. They'll be like, I know who that is. So does this mean that we lose faith in humanity? That we don't have a more discerning movie going public? I lost faith in humanity after the first watch of this film. I don't know where your head's at I'm sort of
Starting point is 00:12:47 I don't know I'm sort of just doing this I just think I'm pretty much using this as a tool to become better friends with you Tim I just think that this is
Starting point is 00:12:56 this is a this is going to be an experience of joint suffering okay well let's explore that a little bit because you've got the strangest vehicle
Starting point is 00:13:03 to try and forge a relationship with me out of. That's right. You could have gone, hey, Tim, do you want to go play pool every Monday? Should we go and play pool and we'll get real good at pool? Or we could both buy a computer game that would be fun to play. Do you know, all of these tried and true friend-making techniques, what I'm doing is I'm trying to forge a unique relationship
Starting point is 00:13:26 a relationship built on I don't know what One of the worst films ever made I guess a relationship built on the bedrock of Grown Ups 2. Out of your menu of options, why did you pick this format and specifically
Starting point is 00:13:41 this film? I just picked the film because you... I picked the film, actually. You suggested grown-ups, though. Did I? Oh, no, I suggested grown-ups. I said grown-ups, too. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:53 Both are bad options. Look, I just thought it would be fun to do this with someone every week, and then eventually we'll go insane together. Where were we? Does it matter? Okay. How are you going?
Starting point is 00:14:12 Look, man. Don't talk about the movie just for a little bit. Let's have some reprieve. How's this guy going? How's Tim back? Yeah, I know. I want to take a step back and it's this movie related, but I am a little worried.
Starting point is 00:14:24 You mentioned this before. Um, I feel like I may have lost a bit of perspective because there were real moments of this film where I was going, Hey, you know what? This is all right. This isn't a terrible film.
Starting point is 00:14:35 Absolutely. And that makes me concerned that I've lost, um, kind of my grip. No, you just consider it. Just, this is sort of,
Starting point is 00:14:43 this is a safe place when we're watching the movie and we're doing the podcast nothing is real so this is a place where you can feel any emotion and that's okay because you're not you're not of sound mind you're not quite right but i'm just i'm worried because from week one and uh so from week one i went in unknowing and unscathed and unhurt and i went into that experience um basically tearing my hair out by the end of the film. You know, clock watching, wondering how... I stopped the movie multiple times so the timer would come up to see how much more of the film there was to go. And this week, no stopping.
Starting point is 00:15:20 This goes back to the marathon analogy. There are markers. I mean, it's like, for instance, when we were at the party, the party at the end of the movie, and it's before all the fraternity boys show up. Yeah. And I was saying, we're near the finish line, and you said you think that,
Starting point is 00:15:33 but there's actually quite a lot of stuff to go. And I was right. I recounted it out loud, but see, we know now. We know there are certain moments when you reach that and you go, okay, obviously this is a problem because there's still an hour to go but at least now i know there's only an hour to go it's not like this never-ending open-ended okay nightmare guy i want to drill down into i i feel like we should move our spotlight of focus back to the film i don't think that's necessary i think i want to talk about the ballet recital and i want to talk about the mood of which that was shot and just kind of
Starting point is 00:16:06 how it gets presented because it's creepy. This is a children's ballet recital. For me the creepiest or when I saw it today and I was like this is a bit wrong is when, because Kevin James pretty much the whole town shows up to this ballet recital because the ballet teacher at the
Starting point is 00:16:22 school is really attractive and sort of and I wouldn't say she's naively she's not naive in the way she advertises this she knows it and it's sort of
Starting point is 00:16:31 an opportunity for her to flaunt her stuff before the girls get to flaunt their stuff in the recital but it's such a strange environment to apply the marketing technique
Starting point is 00:16:38 of sex sales that's right it's very strange because these kids are very young they're very young and Kevin James is filming it
Starting point is 00:16:43 on his little video camera Kevin James films a lot of garbage in this movie. There's another scene where they make this guy pretend he's pooing ice cream. We talked about this in the show. And Kevin James is taking out his phone and he's filming it. This is a really seminal moment in his day. So he's filming at the ballet recital. And the wives, Adam Sandler and Selma Heifer behind him
Starting point is 00:17:05 and him and his wife his name we should probably learn whose wife Kevin James' wife yeah he only calls her honey her name never
Starting point is 00:17:13 actually gets used in the movie well do you know what just a brief side step I was really listening out this time to see if
Starting point is 00:17:19 Hiccups McGee had a name the son of David Spade's child's mother she doesn't at no point do they bother naming that character
Starting point is 00:17:27 that's right anyway so Kevin James is filming it and the wives are going oh isn't she cute isn't she adorable
Starting point is 00:17:33 referring to Adam Sandler's son yeah and then Kevin James is just muttering under his breath yeah I'm watching her yeah yeah I'm looking at her
Starting point is 00:17:41 and obviously he's muttering about the ballet teacher but the wives don't know this I'm assuming and so they're just's muttering about the ballet teacher but the wives don't know this I'm assuming and so they're just okay with Kevin James
Starting point is 00:17:47 sitting there filming mumbling yeah I'm watching her yes I mean and this is just a huge the whole time is weird there's a moment
Starting point is 00:17:54 where they pan across all of the dads who are like Kevin James actually is in the crowd with the mums and everyone else is against the back wall
Starting point is 00:18:01 because they've been driving around in a school bus all day because and the police force escorted them to the recital while firing their guns out the window. Picturing Shaq, and I'll tell you what, that sequence is fucking funny.
Starting point is 00:18:13 Yeah, you had a good one. This movie, but there was something uniquely hilarious. You said that at the moment. I did. This is funny. This is funny. A police car escort that is riding in front of a school bus which is dragging an inflatable raft with a drugged
Starting point is 00:18:26 out bus driver where the cop car is firing its guns a la that crazy Texas dude with the gallon hat from the Simpsons out the windows screaming just careening through the neighbourhood that is funny to me
Starting point is 00:18:41 again I see it is funny it's again I see it is funny it's ludicrous it's big and it is sort of funny but I don't know if it's funny outside of the context
Starting point is 00:18:50 of the film there was other moments I thought were funny the other moment I always laugh twice I've laughed is when Taylor Lautner who's in the fraternity
Starting point is 00:18:59 starts doing backflips I talked about this last week as well and David Spade says that guy behind you is doing backflips for some about this last week as well and david spade says that guy behind you is doing backflip backflips for some reason and it it rang true for me again that this is david spade stepping outside of the world of the movie breaking the fourth wall and saying what the fuck is going on here the other moment you were talking about is adam sandler yes they're in the supermarket
Starting point is 00:19:18 and he runs into those strangers and he goes he wants everyone to disperse and he goes i don't think any of these conversations are going to go anywhere and then he turns to the camera and he goes he wants everyone to disperse and he goes I don't think any of these conversations are going to go anywhere and then he turns to the camera and he winks and then he pulls the fingers and runs off screen
Starting point is 00:19:32 and it just goes to the next scene which is amazing because you could understand the actors trying to insert cries for help in this film
Starting point is 00:19:38 but Adam Sandler wrote this no he did I'm pretty sure I'm not going to go back and watch the credits
Starting point is 00:19:43 because as you mentioned there is no part of me that has a desire to watch this movie outside the confines of having to for this podcast. But I'm pretty sure he's one of the three dudes who wrote this thing. Fact.
Starting point is 00:19:54 Wow. So, yeah. Anyway, back to the ballet recital. I really want to drill into this. So there's a pan shot of the dads at the back wall and they're all mouth agape looking at this ballet teacher who is very attractive
Starting point is 00:20:09 there's no getting past that she's a very attractive woman there are huge shots of her cleaver she is crawling on the ground in a very sexually submissive position she's crawling, she gets all of the ballet students to crawl, and by the way the dance they're doing is not ballet.
Starting point is 00:20:27 It is so far from ballet. It's like some sort of lame interpretive hip-hop dancing. But she gets all of the girls to crawl from the back of the stage to the front of the stage. And she sets up in front of all of them and crawls. And it's a big shot down her cleavage. And I'm just thinking, why are you... Well, obviously she didn't write the script,
Starting point is 00:20:46 but as the character of the ballet teacher, why are you exploiting yourself and taking the focus off the kids? And she is front and centre. Like, there's something... And you could probably say this for every character in the film. There is something mentally wrong with this character. Because she does. She can't let the kids be the stars of this show.
Starting point is 00:21:04 She is in the middle. She is in front of all of them. She's blocking a couple of kids at one point. That's right. She can't let the kids be the stars of this show. She is in the middle. She is in front of them. She's blocking a couple of kids at one point. That's right. She is. But once again, John Lovitz, thank Christ he's in this movie because my God, he saves that scene
Starting point is 00:21:15 by appearing in a balcony by himself, presumably masturbating with a pair of binoculars. Well, it's not specifically shown, but it is sort of suggested that that's the sort of behaviour he might take part in. And just that line, I'm having a wonderful time. It's so good. We're going to ignore the pedophilic undertones of his character.
Starting point is 00:21:35 We're going to look past them. We're going to assume that this is a guy who is sexually attracted to adults. I think he's a sexual deviant is what he is. Yeah. Because he doesn't take a kids yoga class. He takes a yoga deviant is what he is. Yeah. Because he doesn't take a kid's yoga class. He takes a yoga class of... That's true. ...of grown woman.
Starting point is 00:21:48 And he's excited to be at the ballet recital because the teacher, who is in her 30s, I would say, early 30s, who is married to Stone Cold Steve Austin, because why not? It's grown-ups too. She is very attractive and an adult. The other stuff that happens in this movie, I mean, it seems seems obviously it's silly
Starting point is 00:22:05 to demand that the parenting or the example of parenting shown measures up to any sort of standard of parenting
Starting point is 00:22:13 but none of the dads have any idea about what their kids do Chris Rock's completely taken aback that his daughter can sing and she's about 14
Starting point is 00:22:21 Adam Sandler finds out his kid's really good at kicking footballs and before he breaks his leg and when he breaks his son's leg the first thing he says is oh my god i'm so sorry is don't tell your mother and he does the classic adam sandler yell adam sandler yeah his daughter says you were just yelling at me and then adam sandler on the way to buying ice cream adam sandler in front of all of his friends and family, yells at his daughter,
Starting point is 00:22:45 I DON'T YELL AT YOU! It's freaky, man. No one should have to go through that. No one should have a father like that. It's awful. And Kevin James isn't aware that his son is a piano virtuoso. Everyone's caught off guard. That's right.
Starting point is 00:22:58 By skills that their children have. And some of their children are quite old. And the way that the filmmakers frame it is that it's meant to be heartwarming when they discover the stuff like the music always changes and you get these sort of slow shots of the faces as they realize that their children have talent but that's not right it should just be like they should know they should know so far up their own asses pissing away every fucking work day at kmart they don't have any time to see what the actual kids are doing Kevin James' response
Starting point is 00:23:25 to finding out that his child is a borderline musical genius at age 8 on the piano is to in quick succession burp fart and sneeze and then claims also to be a genius. We need to talk about the burp fart sneeze
Starting point is 00:23:42 it's got a name I don't remember it burp snarting I think they call it burp, fart, sneeze. It's got a name. I don't remember it. Burp snarting, I think they call it. A burp snart. Burp snart. Anyway, so Kevin James' character, probably the only reason that these guys were friends with him in intermediate school is because he can do this thing where he sneezes, burps, and farts at the same time.
Starting point is 00:23:59 And I'm assuming these guys have been friends for what? 30 to 40 years. It feels like it. And it's still still like they are still every time he does it which is several times a day yeah they are impressed as if it's the first time they've ever seen it and they have the intellectual capacity of a 12 year old boy at one point they use the burps sneeze fart to to unify like five different dinner you know there's all the dinner scenes and they're all explaining it to their families like no one else in the family
Starting point is 00:24:25 knows what it is. This is like one of the only things that they talk about in the town. It's a strange thread where there is a scene where similar to the start of the film where it has a little vignette of how everyone's morning starts in the family. They're going through dinner time at everyone's respective house
Starting point is 00:24:41 and the kind of, the unifying thread that they've decided to tie their storylines together is every dad explaining to their family how fantastic Kevin James is at being able to emit every bodily function at one time and then David Spade
Starting point is 00:24:58 tries to show his son it and he kind of does it and then he says I think I shat myself Adam Sandler does it at the very end of the movie literally the final words, the final scene I shat myself Adam Sandler does it at the very end of the movie literally the final the final words the final scene of the movie Adam Sandler who
Starting point is 00:25:09 he's like he's about to have a lovely time with his with Selma Hayek they're married they're about to do what married people do
Starting point is 00:25:18 they've overcome some adversity he's happy that there's a fourth child on the way they're just about to get on the good foot and do the bad thing and the last thing we hear is adam sandler doing it and celebrating yeah yeah that is a man uh who not only doesn't deserve a family but perhaps doesn't deserve
Starting point is 00:25:35 any kind of relationship that's that's long lasting with people like his friendships and things he in this movie who is the biggest piece of crap. He's such an arsehole to everyone around him. He's abusive to his kids. He breaks his kids leg. He is so unhappy at the prospect of having another child to Selma Hayek who is obviously very emotionally invested in this. Even before you find out she's pregnant
Starting point is 00:25:58 you know that this is important to her. I think you're being a little hard on Adam here. I absolutely know. He's loving. There's a nice dinner table scene when he sits down and says, this is my favourite part of the day. I get to spend it with my four best friends. Because everyone fucking hates him because they don't have to hang out with him. No, they don't hate him.
Starting point is 00:26:13 They like spending time with him. He's the fun, goofy dad. They don't know him. Do you know why his four family members are his best friends? Because no one else can fucking tolerate it. Are you kidding me? Did you not just watch him spend like three hours in Kmart with Kevin James, Chris Rock and David Spade
Starting point is 00:26:28 and a whole handful of others who would wish they could get involved in the circle of French? They're on the gravy train. Not on the gravy train. They've got jobs. David Spade helps out at the go-kart track. That pays pretty good.
Starting point is 00:26:40 Kevin James, he owns almost the greatest body shop, the car shop in town Chris Rock is a cable guy actually grossly negligent to their job yeah now listen this is something else I wanted to drill into
Starting point is 00:26:51 a little bit with this episode no one can perform their jobs and none of their jobs are very difficult I don't understand how the economy
Starting point is 00:27:00 of this town works because you never see anyone doing their job Adam Sandler when he made a lot of money it's all explained at the end of the movie Adam Sandler made a lot of money it's all explained at the end of the movie Adam Sandler
Starting point is 00:27:07 so until Lenny Faser went to Hollywood made a lot more money than any of you knuckleheads will probably make in your life and he came back to this town do you know why? because it's his home
Starting point is 00:27:19 this is funny because he's talking to the college kids who are probably going to go on to Silicon Valley jobs. They might be working at Chase Manhattan. They're made to look like boneheads. And they are boneheads. But I'm saying, Adam Sandler, you're right.
Starting point is 00:27:33 He does bankroll pretty much the whole town. Yeah, but also, at no point is anyone performing the task which they give to society. Kevin James is almost doing a job. Kevin James is at no point doing his job. We go to his workplace. When? We go to the body shop
Starting point is 00:27:50 and then David Spade climbs in the tyre and spins through the whole city. Yeah, but none of them are performing the job which they're tasked to do. They put David Spade... He's the owner. He shows up and he provides encouragement and then he goes and goofs off with his wacky friends.
Starting point is 00:28:03 That's what I mean though. Okay, so let's go through the movie briefly. The bus driver is the first person we see... Provides encouragement And then he goes And goofs off With his wacky friends That's what I mean though Like okay So let's go through the movie Briefly The bus driver Is the first person We'll see He's wasted on drugs
Starting point is 00:28:10 He's drugged out His fucking mind It would be The mailman The mail But we don't see him Delivering the mail We see him talking about
Starting point is 00:28:17 Some high ex bra Exactly Who else has an occupation Who we see The yoga teacher shows up And takes No no no We see the janitor
Starting point is 00:28:24 Before the yoga teacher Who is not cleaning anything He's perving on women The we see the yoga teacher shows up no no no we see the janitor before the yoga teacher he's not cleaning anything he's perving on women the yoga teacher is the one exception to this rule we don't actually see it
Starting point is 00:28:31 but it's implied it is implied that he can perform his job he's the only one I see we go through even enough even okay so then we're in Kmart
Starting point is 00:28:38 for approximately half of the night no one is doing their job except for that old guy who kicks the bus driver out of the bed and then makes him stop doing the poos on the toilet. Oh, no, but he says, he gets on the loudspeaker and says, clean up on aisle six.
Starting point is 00:28:52 That's right, he's not cleaning. So he's not cleaning, he's passing the buck. Someone else we don't see is doing their job. The guy who actually works at Kmart, who is the coil third, Chris Roth. Holy, that's for next episode. We'll get into that catchphrase
Starting point is 00:29:06 um my point being no one is performing their role no you're not wrong it's it is it is flawed
Starting point is 00:29:13 how does this economy work no one's contributing anything this is why America's going down the toilet guy because no one's actually pulling their weight and everyone's they're on the teat
Starting point is 00:29:22 they feel entitled they're all on the they're all on Hollywood's teat you know listen we've reached the maximum length of which we promised to
Starting point is 00:29:30 do these for I don't think anyone wants to listen to any more of this how are you going though how was your week
Starting point is 00:29:35 just quickly look man it was alright up until today you it's going great I love this I can't wait
Starting point is 00:29:43 to come back to your house next week spend an hour 40 wriggling on a couch next to you and then complaining into a microphone for 25 minutes after that this is the worst idea in the world on that note
Starting point is 00:29:54 the worst idea no it's the worst idea in the world it's also the worst idea ever of all time of all time if you want to get in touch with us do so on Twitter my Twitter handle is
Starting point is 00:30:04 tim underscore bat b-a- twitter my twitter handle is tim underscore bat b-a-t-t mine is guy underscore mont and uh send help hey listen pray for us send help send snacks send snacks just you know just have a great day don't watch the movie we'll do that for you don't watch the movie can't stress that enough please don't watch the movie. We'll do that for you. Don't watch the movie. Can't stress that enough. Please don't watch the movie. Alright, but if you did enjoy it, make sure you subscribe and whatnot.
Starting point is 00:30:29 And also, I'm going to be on our friend's podcast Cheap Tuesday watching iFrankenstein, which compared to this is a bloody marvel. Well,
Starting point is 00:30:37 I'm going to one-up you. I'm going to be on seven days this week, so watch that on TV3. but now we've both dated this podcast terribly. Oh, wait.
Starting point is 00:30:44 Oh, we have. I was going to say, you're also on TV. Oh, but now we've both dated this podcast terribly. Oh, wait. Oh, we have. I was going to say, you're also on TV. Oh, yeah. But I don't know if we want to cross those streams because I feel like the publicity department may have words with you. Look, thanks for listening. Bye, everyone. Go do something better with your time.
Starting point is 00:30:57 Lots of love. All the best. The worst idea of all time. Podcast.

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