The Worst Idea Of All Time - Welcome to Domore
Episode Date: March 19, 2020Guy and Tim are on their way to a day of Dolittle and they’re very excited for an anticipated train wreck of a film. On the way in to the cinema, the boys share a discussion on Short Men's Rights an...d Guy has inside insight into Robert Downey Jr's press junket. Take your shoes off, buy a popcorn and enjoy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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We have no choice but to embark on this perilous journey.
This feels dangerous.
Dangerous.
Dangerous.
We're living dangerously.
Welcome to the preamble for Do More, a very limited podcast series with your boys, the
frosty fellas themselves,
Tim Batt and Guy Montgomery.
That's right.
It's 9.50 a.m. on Monday, the 10th of February.
We are currently driving from Tim's beautiful home in Graylin
to Event Cinemas, West City, one of the events I have not yet been to,
for the 10 past 10 a.m. screening of Dr. Dolittle.
A screening I imagine we'll have almost entirely,
surely entirely to ourselves.
We should put a bet on this.
I want a nice, clean, virginal cinema.
I don't want anyone ruining this experience for me.
Do you know what would be nice about that is then,
say the next screening at 12 whatever,
when people start joining us,
it'll feel like they're coming into our lounge.
Yeah.
I think we should be gracious hosts.
We should.
We should be gracious hosts.
Really encourage them to get into the film and have a good time.
We should ask for the biggest vat of popcorn available,
and when people come in we could say, would you like some popcorn?
A vat.
What sizes do you have available?
We have small, large, medium, extra large, and vat.
What's that Simpsons episode where Homer gets offered a garbage bag of popcorn?
I don't know.
No, it's when he puts on all the weight, you know, when he works from home and hits the bird.
I like the usher that you just created listed the orders as small, large, then medium, then extra large.
Yeah.
I'm a chaos agent, dude, and that's why we're doing this.
We'll be seeing Doodle Little three times today, and that's the podcast series.
It was going to be four, but I've fucked something up, and I have to be somewhere.
I think that's going to be a pretty merciful decision.
From everything I've heard, this movie is bad in a way that is different from how Cats, for example, is bad.
Yes. It's genuinely unwatchably
bad yeah i like which i think actually to be fair a lot of people did say about cats i like
where we're at i like what we're doing at the moment we're experimenting with the form we
genuinely are we're kicking the tires on some new formats we're seeing what is up we're also um
filming this so hopefully the video is on patreon
for the patreon powers yeah absolutely if you want to see what it looks like while i break
two laws simultaneously i actually recording's probably not illegal but certainly uh i've got
my uh map on my leg so i can have my left hand that's fine though that's my waving you're allowed
to look at your phone if it's maps you're meant to be concentrating on the road and the road alone.
What is the law on holding a mic while driving?
Text in.
We don't know.
8383.
Let us know.
Give us a shout.
Tim, what do you know about Doolittle?
What do you know about, I mean, can I just say, as soon as I saw the trailer, I knew this was going to be a disaster.
1,000%.
It had that real heavy, somber cover of Wonderful World.
Yeah.
Which just seems so tonally off.
Yeah.
It's insane that Robert Downey Jr.
finally sets himself free
from the Marvel Cinematic Universe
and then jumps right into bed
with this.
Let's talk about Robert Downey Jr.
because he talked a big old game.
Finally,
the Iron Man Chronicles was ended.
He was done.
And he was like,
you know what I'm going to do now?
I'm going to fuck around with AI.
I've made a documentary with Netflix.
We're talking about science.
We're talking about the future.
I'm going to be a philanthropist.
Was that his big play?
I think so.
And this fucking movie he must have been making while he was lying to us.
No, do you know, I think maybe he thought that Doolittle was a genuine animal welfare movie.
And he was like, sure, I'll spend some of my philanthropic hours helping out these talking animals uh he might
think he's making a documentary and that's why he's doing the funny voice he's really little
have you seen him standing up no i've not our dj is a he's a wee man which is all good but i think
people need to embrace you know size it little bit. I actually just remembered.
Hollywood's very mean to short men, though.
You wouldn't know because you're like 6'1", you fucking monster.
It's not just Hollywood.
I feel like society at large is ruthless towards one of the ways that nearly all women are mean to men is specifically towards short men.
Here we go.
This is now a men's rights activist podcast.
Welcome to it. If you don't
like it, then you can
listen to something. Go listen to Boners of the Heart.
Stop. Yeah. And actually, no, don't.
Those two goddamn broads
keep man bashing on their
podcast. If we're going to send you anywhere, it's going
to be to the male gaze. Yes.
A podcast that cannot and will not
pass the Bechdel test on
principle.
I actually just remembered, though, and I'm not going to put this in the preamble for
more little.
Is that what it is?
Do more.
And this is the preamble, and you know I refuse to edit, so whatever you're going to say,
say it.
No, I'm going to save it for the first episode because I got given it's actually not that juicy
but some pretty interesting
insight
a friend
did the junket
for Doolittle
oh
and got some
vaguely interesting
information about
Robert Downey Jr
behind the scenes
the man
behind the mask
interesting
behind the iron mask
I am
probably looking forward
to this first one,
dreading the idea of having to watch it again.
I think, I can't remember.
All the information I have is that Kumail Nanjiani gets a few laughs.
Oh, is he in this?
The cast is fucking insane.
Is he voicing an animal?
I don't know if you made it to the end of the trailer, Tim,
but the cast list is crazy.
It was so funny because it was like, you see the trailer, like oh they're fucked up and this looks expensive and then it just goes
boom boom boom boom boom and each boom is a very famous person honestly insane that you would make
what is definitely a large scale large budget kids movie and release it outside of any holiday
window like literally bury the thing in public in fact can i can i do a new zealand comedian's budget kids movie and release it outside of any holiday window.
Like, literally bury the thing in public.
In fact, can I do a New Zealand comedian's joke on this,
or is that really awful?
If you credit them, you can.
Ray O'Leary, who is honestly one of the funniest dudes going at the moment, has a great joke about going to Toy Story,
kids being attracted to the movie Toy Story,
when you've got famous vocal talents.
The kid's going, oh, hey, Mum, is Tom Hanks in this?
I loved him in Philadelphia.
Fuck, it's good.
Yeah, that Ray O'Leary.
Follow him on Twitter.
He's good.
I think he's IamRayO'Leary.
You'll find him.
You'll find him.
So I'm excited to see Doodlittle.
It is crazy to me that Doodlittle has come out just after Cats
because they seem cut from the same producer's style cloth.
And I mean producers, the producers, the musical.
As in like, is some shit going on at the moment?
Do you know what?
And I hate to bring it up.
You know I hate to bring it up.
But that Weinstein estate, I mean ebstein estate is floating around do you think the lawyers needed to just like get rid of some
money quick or something i get it through some projects what are ebstein's money yeah clean the
money you got to clean the money how do you do that what you give it to a talking doctor a madman
you first of all you create a c CGI film version of Broadway musical Cats,
and then secondly, you create Doolittle,
but you completely miss the mark on it.
I mean...
But, like, intentionally.
Crazier things have happened.
We are now excitingly arriving.
If you spin that camera around, Tim,
you should be able to give some people,
the people, some beautiful context for just where we are.
West City, Waitakere.
You should probably see what I'm doing a little bit here.
So this is our chosen cinema.
Have you been to the cinema before?
Uh-uh.
From the photos on Google Maps when you punch it into your destination,
looks like it could be a pretty good time.
There's not a lot of people in the photo of the cinema,
which suggests that even if it was taken at peak time,
it was pretty empty.
So I imagine at off-peak times at peak time, it was pretty empty.
So I imagine at off-peak times such as this,
it's going to be a wasteland.
I mean, technically, we're cutting it pretty fine,
but from my experience watching Cats,
you're going to be sitting through about 20 minutes of trailers.
Sounds right.
Sounds good.
I don't want to pull into this part.
This is the entry.
It's this entry right there.
No, that's not our entry, mate.
What are we doing?
Are we doing something
a little bit sneaky?
We're going one entry further.
Okay.
Yeah, look at it.
There it is.
Beautiful.
I mean, you probably can't see it,
but my God,
it gets the heart going,
doesn't it?
It is a fucking mall,
which are among the more
depressing buildings that exist.
When I was a kid...
Here they go.
Prisons,
and then libraries,
because I detest books, and then the mall. When I was a kid... Here they go. Prisons, and then libraries, because I detest books, and then the mall.
When I was a boy, it was my dream to be trapped in a mall.
There was an episode of the OC where they get trapped in a mall.
There was a New Zealand book by the author, I think his name's David Hill.
A book.
A very iconic New Zealand author.
Ah, I would weep.
You wouldn't know about it, but the premise is good.
It was wasted on a book, but imagine if this was a TV show or a movie.
That is a dumb premise for a book, because it's absolutely the kind of storyline you
want to see you want to see kids fucking around it wasn't there a saved by the bell could you not
say that for every fucking book in the world yeah absolutely and i had and i did um 90 minutes i
think we're gonna be a little longer than that. West City, Waitaki. Might be a challenge to find a park that fulfills our needs perfectly.
We've got business to attend to.
Yeah, fuck.
That's a good point because the structure of today is we see Doodlittle.
We record a podcast.
We see Doodlittle again.
Where are we going to record the podcast?
Mate, we'll figure it out.
We're resourceful men.
We'll start a fire and then when everyone clears out. Oh, no, because. We'll start a fire, and then when everyone clears out...
Oh, no, because that'll interrupt the session times, actually.
I mean, I was thinking we could do it in the hallway between...
That seems silly.
You'll notice I've just done a lap, a very small lap.
It's just nice to really ground yourself in the location.
It's important.
It's good.
But is this building for us, Monty,
or are we going to need to park elsewhere?
Outside the baby factory.
No, this building's for us.
How busy can them all be on a Monday?
I know.
It's so true.
Fuck, I'm looking forward to stretching my feet.
I'm going to take my shoes off in this cinema.
I should have brought a pillow.
That is not done.
Yeah.
No, it will be today because no one will be in there. Ordinarily. Shoes off in the cinema. I should have brought a pillow. That is not done. Yeah. No, it will be today because no one will be in there.
Ordinarily.
Shoes off in the cinema.
Sacrilege.
On the record is doing it.
You're asking for trouble.
Have you seen those absolutely rancid videos of people using touchscreens on planes with their dirty bare feet?
Here we go.
I fucking vomit.
Free parking for 240 minutes.
Not bad.
See, now this is what I'm talking about.
You go upper level.
That bottom level, that's prime time.
That's where all of the plebs or the folks who are only going in to pick up something from the warehouse,
which is sort of a Walmart equivalent.
But people who are going to watch Dr. Doodle three times, they know.
You come out to the uncovered car park on the second level.
You've got 240 minutes. And also also people aren't policing it up here people might be policing it undercover but people
are not policing uncovered car parks on the second level they're just not it's just not done and the
good news for you guys is um we've arrived we've got five minutes to get our tickets get our snacks
get into the cinema and check in with our friend robert danny jr as he navigates a group of ragtag animals
from i don't know an old house onto a ship from what i can tell let's find out this is do more
we're supposed to say it at the same time i was gonna say i was gonna do the quote that you that
we took from the trailer that you used on me. It's okay to be scared.
We have no choice but to
embark on this perilous journey.