The Yak - Big Cat: BLOCKED, Chickenfry: IN | The Yak 10-13-21

Episode Date: October 14, 2021

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's the Yak. It's the act. It's the act. It's the act. We have a musical chairs type of situation that's about to descend on our program. We're kind of at an impasse. Like when too many ships are trying to go through a dam at the same time right now. We got seven seats.
Starting point is 00:00:42 Yeah. And we're about to have eight dudes in here. So. Oh, man. Now Steve Che is here, too. Now Steve Che is going to want a seat. He's going to want a squid game in. Yeah. TJ, can we do a quick pan around the room?
Starting point is 00:00:56 I don't know what to do, man. Let's just take it all in. This is what fucking Barstow is, man. Diversity on the panel. We got blondes. We got brunettes. This is like an Alabama Longhair.
Starting point is 00:01:08 Look at us. I dress like a pledge. This is it. You are dressed like a pledge. You are. Nice shot of sass. Very nice. We got blue eyes.
Starting point is 00:01:20 We got brown eyes. And that's it. Yeah. No green eyes in here. No, no. I'm afraid of them. Go back to where you came from. Green eyes. We got brown eyes. And that's it. Yeah. No green eyes in here. No. No. I'm afraid of them. Go back to where you came from.
Starting point is 00:01:28 Green eyes. Green eyes are for ginger folk. Yeah. As Cusack would call them. We got our spreadsheets. Has anyone else been feeling like their head is like they want to screw it off like a shampoo bottle cap and just flick it away. You know what I mean? Sounds like you have that Havana syndrome.
Starting point is 00:01:50 Yeah, dude. I might have Havana syndrome. You might. I might have some kind of psy-op going on on me. Yeah, maybe. Or is Havana a psy-op or is it just an op? It's not even psychological. No, I think it's just a real thing.
Starting point is 00:02:04 You want to describe what Havana syndrome is to these fucking uneducated bastards? I don't know much about it. I know that it's like apparently it feels like the way I've heard it described is that it feels like your head feels like when you are on a highway and someone has one window down. Yeah. Oh, my God. And it's like the CIA. It's like Russian military or something. It's like planting it in people's hotel rooms and stuff.
Starting point is 00:02:31 Planting what? It. I don't know how it works. It's some radioactive- But not necessarily radioactive, but it moves the same way like a radio in that you can't see it or smell it. And it basically just scrambles your mind.
Starting point is 00:02:43 But how do you plant that? Is this a conspiracy or is it- No, it's a real thing your mind. But how do you plant that? Is this a conspiracy? No, it's a real thing. It's a bunch of people. It's a real thing. Yeah? Should we pull up Havana Syndrome? It happened to your boy, didn't it? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:50 One of your homies? Yeah, big time. He's in the CIA? He killed himself. Yeah. Yeah. That's hilarious. Havana Syndrome, what we know.
Starting point is 00:02:57 And this is the WSJ. Different than a SJW. It's a set of unexplained medical symptoms. Subscribe to this. Use Jerry's number. Get Jersey Jerry in here. Maybe we can put his card on file and subscribe to this. Caleb, you haven't heard anything about Havana syndrome?
Starting point is 00:03:13 Actually, yeah. I think I heard somebody say it in passing. So what happens? You just end up dead? No. You get sick to your stomach? No, I think you do. You just go crazy.
Starting point is 00:03:22 You might get dead. You might wind up dead. Really? I'm not positive, but I think that it's like... I think it just really fucks with your stomach. Yeah, I think you just like go crazy. You might get dead. You might wind up dead. Really? I'm not positive, but I think that it's like... I think it just like really fucks with your head. And they only do it
Starting point is 00:03:29 to people like, we're not important enough to do it to us. No, I don't think so. Thank God. Spies and shit though. Did it originate in Cuba or what?
Starting point is 00:03:36 At the Hotel Nacional in Cuba. It did, yes. Yes. Your city ain't shit unless it has a syndrome. Havana, Stockholm. Wuhan.
Starting point is 00:03:45 Down. Down. Down. Yeah, it's fucking... Your city ain't shit unless it has a syndrome. Havana, Stockholm, down. I used to go on vacation to Asperger's. Down is real. Damn. Caleb, what are you doing in town, my brother? Well, you know, because you just did it with me, but I appreciate you bringing it up. Kind of a setup.
Starting point is 00:04:03 Yeah, I know. I said I'm going to knock him down. It's like with an alley-oop. I know I want to put it in the basket, but I could do it myself. I blew it. I know. Labatt Blue, light. Our favorite beer is good games. Yeah. Series finale. How did people perform yesterday? Good.
Starting point is 00:04:19 Nick was good. I have a cannon for an arm. You played? I thought you got cut. He played us. He left 15 minutes in. Yeah, he did. I got there early. You actually went? Yeah. Yeah, Nick went.
Starting point is 00:04:31 And it's crazy because I think Nick and Sass could have been quarterbacks if they had gone down different career paths at 14. At 14 is kind of like the two roads diverge. I'm also ambidextrous when it comes to throwing a football. Are you good at both or are you bad at both? I don't believe that either. You're bad at throwing. I'm good at throwing on both arms.
Starting point is 00:04:53 Spiral. You throw spiral lefty. Well, I am a lefty. If you can throw it 40 yards with your right arm, how far can you throw it with your left arm? We can't throw it 40 yards. Wait, what was the question? You can throw it 40 yards with your right arm. Can you do 40-40?
Starting point is 00:05:03 Well, I can throw it 40 yards with my left arm because I'm a lefty. And then what with your right? Probably 25. Probably 60. This guy. Confidence. You bet. But not as accurate as the left.
Starting point is 00:05:13 No. But it's for power. I'm working on it, though. This guy doesn't know shit about weird haircut Seth. You can not throw it 60 yards with your off arm. I can. No, you can't. He can.
Starting point is 00:05:23 And I can throw it and then I can catch it. He can, Dude Brandon. From his knees. Why would you be so passionate about something you know nothing of? I know how far 60 yards is to throw a football. He can do it. If he says he can do it, you ever never lied to us? We're automatically believing in people now?
Starting point is 00:05:39 Is that what we're doing here? Sass never lied, to my knowledge. I've never lied. Brandon's whole idea of covering football is saying X team is good or X player is good. Yeah. Am I lying? Brandon loves saying teams are on the come up. They're a few years away.
Starting point is 00:05:57 You get off on teams being a few years away. You get off on them get on with calm. That is like a category of sports tweeters who are just like, this player is good. Or this team is good. And that's all that they say in tweet. Yeah. Actually, Stephen Che might have rifled one of those off yesterday. Probably did. Everyone in the NFL is good.
Starting point is 00:06:17 It's so crazy how these players are good. Just an observation I had to make. A little empty of an observation. But Stephen Che, to his credit, also has – he's put – it's like – how did the Wally Pipp situation come about? It's not like a Wally Pipp. It's like if Wally Pipp told Lou Gehrig that he wanted him to play first base because he saw –
Starting point is 00:06:37 Wally made the decision. Yeah, if Wally was the manager in that situation because Stephen Che has ceded uh tricaster board position how would you call it he's still working that makes sense tj could have easily made that yeah no we're shuffling up back i mean it was different because uh you know whenever i've been out uh tj's been great and only covered and avery was doing that before and you and I went to Avery and asked one day when I had to be home for something. He was like, oh TJ should do it he wants to do it and TJ had said he wants to do it
Starting point is 00:07:10 whenever it's available. So TJ's always been the fill in if I'm out for whatever reason. TJ's nice on the sticks. TJ's awesome at this. So when Friday for Tommy Walker day, the control room we had a big show. It was a two hour show and we wanted to get a lot out on social
Starting point is 00:07:26 in real time. Last week, my responsibilities were the cameras and doing all that, and then also cutting stuff up for social, but it's very hard to do in real time to listen, get everyone on camera, and then also cut stuff up. I focused only on social for Friday, and I sat behind
Starting point is 00:07:42 TJ and watched him do it live, and he's a million times better than I would be ever with him. Why? Is that true? Is that true? Are you a million times better? It's what my background's in. It's not like Steven Saldana or anything. It's just what I've been doing for years.
Starting point is 00:07:57 Humble. It was just an informed decision for the show. I like to get more stuff out for social during the show so I can focus on that in real time tj can get much better camera angles and and zooming in you know different directorial stuff um and then it looks good like i still want to on here too and you know all of us we're all in here already so i'm just the deeper i can be the way you can do and it's best for the show so cj for the first time, a full-time member of the Yak? In my mind, TJ is always, but yeah, I mean, I guess so.
Starting point is 00:08:30 Fire up the TJ Rutgers gif. Yeah, TJ Rutgers gif. Is he in the Yak Twitter bio? I just added him. Okay, good, good, good. I don't think he's in the group chat either. Is he in the group chat? He needs to get in the group chat. Yo, TJ will be a such a value add.
Starting point is 00:08:50 TJ is one of those guys where as soon as I saw the Rutgers gif a couple years ago, I was like, oh, I already know. I'm all the way in on TJ. I'm super in on TJ. You could just see sometimes with a distilled moment in time. Other people are a slow burn. TJ picked it up right away. TJ was instant for me.
Starting point is 00:09:05 It was him streaming video games in the pit vipers in his checkered room. Really, it was awesome. He's chugging beers. He's chugging beers, I think, too. There he... He doesn't know anyone's filming him. He's locked in. And here we are at the impasse.
Starting point is 00:09:25 And here lies the impasse. No, no's in hurt. You're in pain. And here we are at the impasse. Okay, here we go. And here lies the impasse. No, no, no, no. Let's figure this out. We are in a musical chair situation. Big Cat is here. And should we just actually play musical chairs? Yeah, let's do it. I haven't played in a while.
Starting point is 00:09:37 Yeah. Kind of. It looks like Brandon just opted out. Brandon, we're going to play musical chairs. Brandon, you want to play musical chairs? Yes. Oh, no, it's too late now. Brandon's already. We can play, but you have to lose. I'm not going to play next. I're going to play musical chairs. You want to play musical chairs? Yes. Oh, no. It's too late now. Brandon's already.
Starting point is 00:09:46 We can play, but you have to lose. I'm back in 20 minutes. I gotta leave. Tag in. So this is a tag team show. It's a tag team match right now. Big Cat, he's got his, what is it, Talersios? Salibrias?
Starting point is 00:10:00 It always sounds like an antidepressant, all these Italian food messes. No. Oh, my goodness. What did you ask? We made Kale play Family Feud yet? We have a nat 8. Yeah, I have played. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:11 Last time I was here, you guys made me play. We've been stuck on that for a while. Let's fire it up again. Let's do it again. Let's do it again. I remember I got, yeah, I did good. I think I said it all the time. Wait.
Starting point is 00:10:20 Someone else needs to play. TJ. Oh. Hitchings? I've only played once. Jersey Jerry felt Tico Texas' feet yesterday. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:32 How was that? Jersey Jerry came up to me after the act as I was getting up to go to the bathroom, and he pulls me aside, and he shows me his phone, and there's just a video of a girl's feet. And he's like, these just don't stop coming in. And I was like ah yeah ah
Starting point is 00:10:48 it was a really uncomfortable episode that brief 10 second period can you give me a synopsis there is just moments where it was toe in the line toe in the line I thought he was about to start sucking toes on the act but you're just playing the heel right now god damn it Ron I was trying to fuck you toes on the act. But you're just playing the heel right now. God damn it, Rona.
Starting point is 00:11:05 I was trying to fuck you. He noticed Tico had white nail polish. Walking on eggshells. Which is supposedly a sign for good pussy. She had what? White nail polish. Yes, women with good pussy tend to have white nail polish. Is that true?
Starting point is 00:11:18 Yes. Caleb, don't you have a cousin who's in defeat? Don't you have a cousin who's in defeat? Probably. For sure. Women's with bad pussy. No nail polish. Or a clear coat.
Starting point is 00:11:31 A clear coat? Mm-hmm. But he could tell when he sees a clear coat? Yeah. Caleb, how's the golf game going? Good. Good. You check up.
Starting point is 00:11:39 You know me. You check up on me all the time. That's my manager. You know that. We've talked about it since the last six months. I just wanted to see. It was just an on-camera ask. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:48 It was just a formality type of situation. No one can accuse me of not asking. Yeah. Big Hat, you look slim today. I'm wearing a black shirt. Slim. That's what it is. Black shirt.
Starting point is 00:11:58 It's got to be what it is. Black shirt big time. You got a long ass Wednesday today. You normally have a long Wednesday But now we have something at Are you going? I think so You mean coming or going?
Starting point is 00:12:11 Should I come? Yeah Do you want me to come? Yes I would like to come But I don't want to come If you guys don't want me to come No you will be a
Starting point is 00:12:18 Very valuable ad Okay I'm in Because I think I just didn't know If you were going to come No I've already I've made arrangements to come Because some of us
Starting point is 00:12:26 Are nervous about it I'm always nervous About everything Kyle What's the worst Something that happens I'm really excited We say something
Starting point is 00:12:37 Really fucked up And someone videotapes it And then we all Lose our jobs for life What is there Three girls that bought tickets Is that the worst Yeah, it was
Starting point is 00:12:44 What is that What are you saying Wait,? Is that the worst? Yeah, it was 46 girls. Wait, you think dudes don't cancel? 46 guys? Oh, shit. What's the worst that could happen? Told out.
Starting point is 00:12:53 Told out, that's clever. Owen, is that you? It's forgettable. How many people sit in this venue? It's going to be like 80. Oh, okay, that's beautiful. A nice intimate evening.
Starting point is 00:13:03 Three girls, and they're all hitched up. How do you know? Oh, okay. That's beautiful. A nice intimate evening. Three girls. And they're all hitched up. How do you know? You've done the research. Yeah. No single girls allowed. KB's got a file on each one of them. It's too much of an abstraction.
Starting point is 00:13:14 Yes, we have the ticket. I looked up it. KB will look at his following tab on Instagram. It will go up by three after tonight. Because there's still perspectives. Just by the fact of them being there, they're perspectives. They've shown interest.
Starting point is 00:13:28 Yes. They opened the DM. That's all I need. I'm pumped. I'm excited as well. Yeah. My only thing is like if we knew Big Cat was going to go,
Starting point is 00:13:36 we should have just done like Caroline's. Well, we can do that next. Yeah. This is a warm up. It's actually good that we're, we started with a ski ball event that was 15 people. Yeah, maybe 15.
Starting point is 00:13:47 That was our crew. 15 people of us. Yeah, we were the majority. If we had gotten into a fight with everyone who came, we would have kicked their ass. Yes. We would have jumped one man. Except for that one dude. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:59 That one dude that was staring at all of us. Well, that one dude had a weapon. He was staring at me the whole time. I don't think he even had a weapon. I think he had a whole... Was that hot wife guy? Hot wife guy? His wife was very hot.
Starting point is 00:14:12 I thought his wife was dead. Nope. His wife was there. She was the only attractive woman there. No, all the women were attractive, but there was a hot wife. She was the hottest there, and she happened to have a husband in tow which was a total cock block of all of us. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:30 Like, hey, if you're a hot wife, don't bring your husband. Caleb, we have a live show tonight. You want to come? Dude, Mikey just... Me and Frankie are schmoozing. With whom? Axelrod? Yep. That's an Axelrod joint. Snip that out. Dude. Caleb's in town. Him and Axelrod? Yep, yep, yep. Oh, that's an Axelrod joint.
Starting point is 00:14:45 Snip that up. Dude. Caleb's in town. Him and Axelrod are going to be linking up. Snooze Fest with Frankie Borelli. But I didn't know you guys had a show. You didn't tell me. How's Axelrod's ticker?
Starting point is 00:14:56 I think it's working as far as I know. Yeah? He had a ticker problem? Well, yeah. He did. Fuck. And it's better, I think.'s still he's still here i'm always checking out on the homies tickers kb how's your ticker what does that mean your heart bro you know
Starting point is 00:15:13 what that means you are nervous for tonight yeah you're a little ornery oh no you're ornery are you uh are you not gonna relapse oh no i'm to have three beers before the show. I'm going to be the funniest I've ever been. You guys ever see Three Beard Nick? He's quick as a whip. I think I have seen Three Beard Nick. I thought Three Beard Nick leaves. No, that's Four Beard Nick.
Starting point is 00:15:37 Or Three Beard Nick at 10.30 p.m. I'm going ten beers before we even get on stage. Are you doing a set? no I don't think so why? that's the whole reason I wanted to come I don't know
Starting point is 00:15:49 I just don't know if it'll work yeah I wanted to see Sass do a yak set we could probably get his notebook and just kind of read off his jokes
Starting point is 00:15:56 I will do that let's just get his shit he writes fast he was saying he was like I'm a quick writer I can write like a whole set in like 15 minutes
Starting point is 00:16:04 it takes longer to do the set than write it, you said. Not at all. I said that writing jokes for stand-up was significantly easier than writing sketches. Got it. And I still think that's true. So how long is the show? An hour, I think. We're going to do an hour 20, though.
Starting point is 00:16:21 Hour 20? Yeah. Are we going to be able to play Family Feud? Yeah. I was going to say, I don't know if we have an hour 20 without hour 20 yeah are we gonna be able to play Family Feud yeah I was gonna say I don't know if we have an hour 20 without Feud maybe we oh we should do that actually
Starting point is 00:16:31 we should pass something out and have them answer and they could give us the top answers it's real life Family Feud oh that's great nah
Starting point is 00:16:37 because they're gonna try to be jesters no gestures we should just let people know up front I think it's gonna be really I think we're gonna do an hour easily yeah but we should do let people know up front I think it's going to be really I think we're going to do an hour easily yeah but we should do
Starting point is 00:16:48 we can't do an hour without when was the last time we did an hour of this show without feud I don't know it's been a while fire it up TJ get on the sticks TJ we can't why don't we have a yak shirt that says yak
Starting point is 00:17:03 and the family feud logo and it's like the names of the people on the show by the way Like, we can't just quit cold turkey. Why don't we have a yak shirt that says yak in the Family Feud logo? And it's like the names of the people on the show? By the way, by the way, we got to book a guest. We got to book this dude. Did you see this dude flipping out about Family Feud? He gave the worst answer ever on Family Feud the other night. The actual show. Is this the guy that got like eight points total on Fast Money?
Starting point is 00:17:24 Yes. Was this recently? Yes. He sucks. Was this recently? Yes. Can we find the clip? We have to find the clip. We also have to find the guy because then he spent the entire night just responding to everyone who said he sucks. Oh, he has a Twitter.
Starting point is 00:17:36 Yeah. He was very upset. We found him. He was very upset. I'll DM him now. One of the questions was, name a sport you can play indoors and outdoors he said lacrosse that's true which is that's not an answer you know you do not go lacrosse basketball yeah probably is the answer well because it's not based off of like factual answers
Starting point is 00:17:56 basketball's got to be? Yeah. Lacrosse. Billiards? Can we watch? I got to find him. Hold on. Shit, I would suck if that was on a live show. Steve Harvey would crack some horn. Oh, here it is. That's tonight. Nicky underscore bunny bus.
Starting point is 00:18:16 Yeah. Nicky bunny bus? Yeah. What were his... Okay, so he was getting roasted. I can't even figure out what the other questions were. He got a total of 14 points. And it's a shame that your teammates are your family,
Starting point is 00:18:32 so you just got to drive home with them. Yes, yes. Yeah, that's terrible. And Steve Harvey just made you say something real fucking provocative in front of your wife and daughters. Oh, is he like a hot guy? Well, he claims he's hot. Oh, he does?
Starting point is 00:18:51 He's a self-professed hot guy? Self-claimed. You can just do that? And it takes? The hotness took. That's fucking wild. Just claim hot? Isn't a big part of hotness
Starting point is 00:19:03 confidence? Oh my God. Where's the clip? Until a real ugly person gets confident as fuck. It's like wild. Just claim hot. Isn't a big part of hotness no confidence? Oh my God. Where's the clip? You think that until a real ugly person gets confident as fuck. It's like, why is he? No, but ugly people
Starting point is 00:19:10 that get confident get put in their place very quickly. Yeah, they'll fucking go viral. Unless they're tattooed or dressed funny. Oh, he is a self-proclaimed hot guy.
Starting point is 00:19:18 He is. He's like, I'm clearly good looking enough to make myself my own Twitter avatar. You must be too ugly to put yourself. Damn, he loves himself.
Starting point is 00:19:28 His self-love is off the charts. I think he might be, but he also got into it with Katie Nolan, so then he started retweeting Dave bashing Katie Nolan. Does he follow you? He does not. Then he's not a real stoolie. He's not a real stoolie. Does he follow any of you guys? What's his name?
Starting point is 00:19:44 Following. Nick Bunnybuss. Nick underscore Bunnybuss. I'm trying to find real stool he's not real stool he's not real stool he's not real stool he's not real stool does he follow any of you guys what's his name following uh nick bunny bus nick underscore bunny bus i'm trying to find the clip what corner of twitter is he in what's nicky underscore bunny bus nicky what type of shit is he on what type of shit is he uh he looks like he's a little bit of extreme politically his last oh you know what i think this guy hates me. Shut up. Well, he follows Graham Mertz. He follows Dave. He follows the Water Dogs, my lacrosse team. He follows Tim Dillon. He's a lax boy.
Starting point is 00:20:16 But I think he doesn't like Libcat. Reading through his tweets. Say something libertarian. I don't think he likes Libcat. Say something that endorses people's personal freedoms. I think if I had to guess, he was a former fan of mine. He had the unfollow? He smashed the unfollow?
Starting point is 00:20:33 I'm just pontificating here. He follows Big Man on campus. Yeah, right. He follows Chili's, my favorite restaurant. Anyway, we got to get him on. Yeah, that would be good. on. That would be good. Yes, that would be fantastic. How'd you fuck this up so bad?
Starting point is 00:20:48 We got to find the... You guys have an encore for tonight? Maybe you do Family Feud for the encore. Ooh. If it's requested, you can't just come back out and assume. I think we should do like an intense walk-in. I said to Kyle, I want you guys to pick walk-up songs. Yeah, I think it'd be funny.
Starting point is 00:21:03 I'll just be sitting at the table while you three walk in then. Why? I'll greet you. I'll be an usher. So I'm not coming? Yeah, you're coming. You have to. It'll be like when LeBron goes to his son's AAU game.
Starting point is 00:21:16 And he just Snapchats you dunking on the warm-ups and they leave. But Nick just said, Nick said, I'll just be sitting there when the three of you walk in. Yeah, yeah. KB's not going to show up. There's a zero percent chance.
Starting point is 00:21:32 I'm going to run that one back during the live show, the AAU. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good. There's certainly no carryover from this show to the one tonight.
Starting point is 00:21:42 Nah, they're real ones. But there's a chance we just don't put out tonight, too. Tonight could be just a very intimate experience for 80 people. We could just put the pin in it. I'm also just telling that to me and us all psychologically so we take a little bit of pressure off the situation. How much were tickets?
Starting point is 00:21:58 Like $10. Like $45. No, seriously, how much were they? $25. So we don't have to put on that good of a show. We don't. How much is a movie ticket? We talk for an hour every single day.
Starting point is 00:22:12 People put different pressure on themselves. We got some anxiety boys. I think it's going to be easy. Oh, I do too. I think we're going to crush it. Do this for a living. Yeah. You know what else we should crush?
Starting point is 00:22:23 Some Xanax beforehand and put it in our noses. KB, what do you think? I'll probably do like just five milligrams of oxycodone and then like three drinks. Sweet spot. Kyle had a relapse yesterday. He had a sweat attack while we were recording the podcast. We had to stop the podcast. It was immediate soaking wet.
Starting point is 00:22:42 Immediate. I did. Unlike anything I've ever seen. Do we count it on video? It's shocking. wet. Immediate. I did. Unlike anything I've ever seen. Do we capture it on video? It's shocking. I don't know. I get nervous to podcast. You said you were nervous.
Starting point is 00:22:52 I do, yeah. How often are you going through shit and you just put on a good face and you kind of just muscle through it? Yeah, pretty often. Yeah? Just like all the time? You got to do it sometimes. You got to just muscle through shit out here in these fucking streets. You do that a lot, big cat?
Starting point is 00:23:09 What? You ever just muscle through some shit? Yeah, you got to muscle through it. Yeah. Suck it up. Yeah. I'm awful at muscling through things. Yeah?
Starting point is 00:23:17 I compartmentalize in my brain. My brain looks like a bento box. I'm ignoring that kimchi in the corner because it's fucking rancid. It's been rotting. Dealing with it might get your gut right though it truly might wow i've i read a blog post about it whenever i'm going through some mental shit yeah yeah jeff d lowes yeah i i love jeff and i i i love that he wrote blog post, but I also really want to joke about it. Oh, I've already joked. Have you?
Starting point is 00:23:48 Yeah. I mean, not to Jeff. A real one. Behind his back, yeah. See, that's what I want to be doing, but I'm too much of a pussy. It was also very interesting timing because he posts something on Instagram like a Kevin Love quote being like you're not alone. But he did it right after we had finished watching
Starting point is 00:24:10 the Browns-Chargers game and I was like, dude it's fucking 3-2. It's a pretty close game. It was a shootout. They scored 42 points. Like if the Browns win that game on Sunday, does he write that blog? Just things to think about.
Starting point is 00:24:26 Definitely not. Dude, definitely not. How well your favorite sports team is doing is like a huge factor. There is this Browns fan on this Vice heroin documentary who really needed treatment. Yeah. It was like a side plot. And Baker Mayfield. Also, Vice, if you've seen the heroin documentaries, you've seen them all.
Starting point is 00:24:45 You have. But they work, and I still watch them all. It's the same thing every time. Did you watch the one where the people lived in the woods? Vice? Yeah. They were just heroin addicts that live in the woods. Damn, what is this?
Starting point is 00:24:55 The best was the one in Wales, because the accent just makes the addiction. It's like Trainspotting. The country Wales. I thought it was like Pocahontas. Swanson. I thought it was pinocchio addicted to heroin living in wales there's boys living inside of wales how do they um do you think that they're giving the people money to i don't know how that works what's like how do you
Starting point is 00:25:18 approach them yeah like are there really talented producers who are just like hey like can we exploit your pain like can we get some cameras exploit your pain? Do they pay them? Do they give them heroin? That's what I mean. If they pay them, you know where that money's going. They're not buying new sweatshirts because those have a bunch of holes in them. I feel like if they were giving them heroin, that would be something that came out a while ago.
Starting point is 00:25:38 Like Vice gives... Vice is giving people heroin. It's probably really good shit. You know they're not going to be it's not going to be laced. Williamsburg. It's probably safe injection. Yeah, billionaire. They'll put it right in you, actually.
Starting point is 00:25:50 Who was I talking about yesterday about billionaire cocaine? How fucking excellent billionaire cocaine must be. We were talking about that yesterday, too. Were we talking about it together? No. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's got to make your face melt. Was it with Jersey?
Starting point is 00:26:05 Yeah. It's talking about melt. Was it with Jersey? Yeah. It's talking about Columbia. The billionaire's cocaine. Like, do they have someone that tries their cocaine to make sure there's not fentanyl in it? Is that their drug testing kit? It's just a guy named Kit who just fucking... Yeah, drug testing kit. Drug testing kit.
Starting point is 00:26:18 He just has to fucking snort a bunch of himself and see if he dies. Yeah. Like an old emperor fucking eating food, trying food. It's going to be a great night. It's going to be a fantastic show tonight. I'm very excited. TJ, play some Family Feud, TJ. You've earned it, brother.
Starting point is 00:26:31 Where are you guys doing it? Lucky Jack's. Lucky Jack's. Chill-ass bar down in the Lower East Side. It's a cool bar because instead of getting a bucket, you get a cooler. They bring you out a big cooler of beer. Is that true? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:43 So can we get a cooler on stage tonight? Are we going to be drunk tonight? Cooler of Modelo. Are we going to be beer. Is that true? Yeah. So can we get a cooler on stage tonight? Are we going to be drunk tonight? Cooler of Modelo. Are we going to be drunk tonight, Chaz? Yeah. We're going to be fist fighting on stage. Honestly, one lucky audience member gets KB's two-month chip. It will be a collector's item.
Starting point is 00:27:00 It is a one-of-one because he'll never get there again. He'll never reach the three-month chip. Are you really breaking it tonight? I might. B-swag. B-no. But we were looking at some old videos of Kyle, some old lowering the bars. He, like around Christmas time, fat face.
Starting point is 00:27:19 I was fat. Like Arnold Shortman. I lost 22 pounds. And you're losing more. I don't want to lose any more. Think of the torso reveal. You said yesterday you wanted to see. That was spontaneous.
Starting point is 00:27:31 What? What did he say? He wanted to see if he gets a 133. What are you, a jockey? Way too big. Fat ass. Arizona Miller, my rival in high school, was a jockey. Nuh-uh.
Starting point is 00:27:44 You were rivaled up with a fucking horseback man? He was the biggest jockey in, like, Ohio. Nerds versus jockeys. Damn. The jocks in your school were jockeys. Literal. Yeah. Damn.
Starting point is 00:27:59 What's he doing now? I just wondered. I mean, you can jockey Until you're old right Yeah Can you You can jockey forever Don't those Don't jockeys have like
Starting point is 00:28:09 Wasn't that the true life Of jockeys They really had trouble Putting on weight Like the guy was trying To muscle down Like an egg McMuffin In the morning
Starting point is 00:28:15 And he like couldn't Finish one egg McMuffin He was full after a Half of an egg sandwich In the morning It would be funny If they just did like A fat jockey race
Starting point is 00:28:25 every day. Yeah. Like, why not? Horses looking like hammocks. I don't think... I would love to jockey. You can't. It's not...
Starting point is 00:28:33 Oh, no, because... You can't. It's illegal. Right. Unless you wear like a parachute. Which would be cool. But think about it.
Starting point is 00:28:43 Everyone always is like, oh, Kyle, we feel so bad for you because you're so short. I can't jockey. Everybody think about it. Everyone always is like, oh, Kyle, we feel so bad for you because you're so short. I can't jockey. Everybody does all the time. Guys, I'm sorry. I got to go.
Starting point is 00:28:50 I got to go. Balls never... I'm probably taller than balls. Ah, no. He's wider, so he gets... Where are you boys going? Come in here real quick. No, I don't think I am.
Starting point is 00:28:58 Hide off. Hide off. I'm nervous for this one. Hide off. Hide off. Hide off. Hide off with KB. Hide off with KB. Hide off with KB. Hide off with KB. Hide off with KB.
Starting point is 00:29:05 Right in the middle here. Right in the middle here. Hide off with KB. And then you're released to do Sunday Conversation with Caleb. Admirable man taking off his cap.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Hide off. Hide off. Back to back. No, no, he has a backpack on. Just go. Put your front to his back. Yeah, I think. Oh, fuck.
Starting point is 00:29:20 Glennie wins. How tall are you, boss? 5'8 and 3'4. What? 5'8 and 3'4". What? 5'8 and 3'4", and KB's a haiku. 5'7 and a half. 5'7 and 5.
Starting point is 00:29:36 Damn, Caleb's got wigs. Who do they got this week? I think they're going to do Blake Griffin. Damn. No spoilers. But shout out, Blake. Do you hook him up But, um, shout out Blake. Do you hook him up with that big cat?
Starting point is 00:29:48 I did. That's fucking love. Yes, I did. Did we get that Family Feud guy? No, I can't find the clip. That's what I was just doing. I want to fucking find
Starting point is 00:29:56 his, uh, the clip of his performance. I would need to see it. His Twitter, he was really angry at people. There doesn't appear to be video of it. I will reach out to him.
Starting point is 00:30:06 You want him on the show? Harvey probably scrubbed it. So this is the answers. I don't know what the questions were. But you can look at the ones on the left. Let's guess. 10. The age of consent.
Starting point is 00:30:21 Everyone guessed 8. 8 is on the left. 10. Virginia shit. Singing. Things that mimes do Going to the movies Oh my god I don't even know what it could be
Starting point is 00:30:35 They are so A steak and burgers This person might have it Name a number between one and ten Name a high school sport I really wish we had this clip First date activity Singing Number between 1 and 10. Name a high school sport. I really wish we had this clip. First date activity. Singing.
Starting point is 00:30:49 Oh, my God. Singing. Those can't actually be it. Those aren't actually it. It was indoor-outdoor. I know that part. Soccer was a decent answer. Lacrosse was terrible.
Starting point is 00:31:00 I mean, like a fancy dinner. Steak. And then is that burgers? Yeah. We got to get this guy. Go to his Twitter real quick. He's very angry at everyone. Something that inspires people. Art. I don't know if I've ever told you guys
Starting point is 00:31:14 this but I know personally two people that have been on Family Feud. Do you think this is something I should look into for us as a show? Yes. The problem would be we'd have to cut down to five well we'd play for it okay we'd play for it yeah it would be electric yes okay i mean if family feud is smart it tapes in atlanta well wait why don't we just split up the entire yak yak versus
Starting point is 00:31:40 yak oh the yak versus yak would be awesome and have a Yak draft Because we do have enough people Yeah We just Yeah we draft Yeah That would be awesome Oh like a draft Okay I'll get the contact
Starting point is 00:31:50 Yak vs. Yak That would be the best day of my life It would be the best day of mine as well Yeah It also would be The best family feud of all time So they're stupid to not do it The only problem is
Starting point is 00:32:01 There's no No ladies for Harvey to Nah I'm gonna be able to show Harvey My twisted fucking brain when he asks, name something a girl gags on, and then he's shocked. What is this dude doing? Maybe we bring Grandin instead of Brandon.
Starting point is 00:32:16 That's what we do. Bring Grandin. Is that Family Feud, the video where the guy growls at the girl? Probably. And then Steve Harvey pushes him away? Have you seen that? Did you see the guy in the 60s that answered turkey for every question? And it worked.
Starting point is 00:32:32 It worked? It was like, name a lunch meat, name a bird, name something you have on Thanksgiving. This dude went triple turkey. Turkey? What about the woman that was synonyms for mom? And she just kept saying like The same thing Yeah over and over
Starting point is 00:32:49 You guys want to just watch Wait let's watch funny clips Oh you just DM me Get the mom clip He DM'd you what he said Yeah he said it's me Nikki Bonabettis Currently listening to you on the yak
Starting point is 00:32:59 I have it all filmed for you Fuck yes Can he send it to us Oh yeah Hell yes can you send it Ask him if he's pissed off Wait can he call in Yeah Can you send it to us? Oh, yeah. Hell yes. Can you send it? Ask him if he's pissed off that you're a limb. Can he call in?
Starting point is 00:33:06 Can you send it? Yeah. Why don't you just call in? Well, yeah. He can call in, but I want to... Give him my email. He's still not following me.
Starting point is 00:33:13 I think he... I think you don't... Ask him... He might troll you. Yeah, he might troll you. Are you vaxxed? Oh. You have to be vaxxed
Starting point is 00:33:21 to call into the yak. You probably have to be vaxxed to go on Family Feud. It's Big Cat's rule. What's your email, TJ? Don't say it out loud. I'll text you. Okay.
Starting point is 00:33:31 Oh, this could be awesome. Have you guys seen the video I was talking about? Where the girl's bouncing her tits because she's trying to distract the guy, and then the guy's like... Is that Family Feud? Yeah. TJ, can you find that? Steve Harvey pushes it away.
Starting point is 00:33:47 He's like, what the fuck are you doing, man? Vollmeyer. All right, so he's in Twitter jail right now for talking shit to Katie. So that's why he can't tweet right now. Katie. Nolan. Katie no swag? Is this the barking?
Starting point is 00:34:04 Oh, yeah. I think, yeah. I think, yeah. This guy growls. Get him, Carly. Get him. Yeah. Distract him. Distract him.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Come on, Darian. Oh, whoa, whoa. The audio on this is awful I wish we could hear it We play it again That smack is so good She's attractive That guy's wife is right behind him.
Starting point is 00:34:49 Harvey says that to him. What are you doing? What was the question, though? I hope it backfired. Name something that comes in pairs. Name something a man might bark at. Oh, yeah, titties. Pair of titties. A pair of titties.
Starting point is 00:35:09 Do you think he was a crisis actor? I don't know. That shit cannot be real. It can't be real. It just can't be real. It is. It can't be. There's a fake episode of Jerry Springer.
Starting point is 00:35:22 What the hell are you doing? Rowan and I got barked at When we were in Nashville You did By a whole pack of dudes A car of dudes They were just hanging Out of their car going
Starting point is 00:35:31 And then there was One dude in the back Who was going Who was pretending To be a chihuahua Was yipping at you Yeah he's like Did they know you
Starting point is 00:35:38 No No just random dudes They were doing it to Everyone but Roan Was talking to them Yeah he was As he would As he would as he would
Starting point is 00:35:45 I was walking on the train Rome's an absolute liability he is too a liability to walk the streets with that's why I love this guy yeah just make shit awkward
Starting point is 00:35:52 for everyone else no these guys are just scared to talk to anybody that's why this live show is crippling yeah it's interaction other people are gonna hear our conversations
Starting point is 00:36:00 it's fucking terrifying you boys just got dropped from the show we did yeah sorry just the anxiety boys yep it's gonna be a slip Conversations? It's fucking terrifying. You boys just got dropped from the show. We did? Sorry. Just the anxiety boys. There's going to be a slip and slide up there tonight. Fuck you.
Starting point is 00:36:13 We're going to have a Peace Home Ohio sign up there. We should all do a set tonight. Okay. Yeah. I'm down. We'll all do five minutes. I got a great killer even bit about homeless people. That's funny.
Starting point is 00:36:24 Fuck them. Am I right? No, you don't get to go. How are you about homeless people. That's funny. Fuck them. Am I right? Now you don't get to go. How are you a homeless person? You're fat. This don't make sense. Kill them all. They're richer than me.
Starting point is 00:36:35 Oh, God. That'll be funny. Sash, why don't you just write us all a set? Yeah. I will do a set if you write it for me. No matter what. That would be funny. No Ron Burgundy it.
Starting point is 00:36:44 I'm not going to be able to write that many jokes in that amount of time. You could do it. Come on, brother. What about if two of us do a Louis C.K. set and two of us do a Sass set? And they judge. Sat roulette? Yeah, whose was it? Yo, that would be sick.
Starting point is 00:37:01 I'm going to write you a set, but you have to say anything that I write down. Yeah. Deal. Slurs included. It's a comedy show, bro would be sick. I'll write you a set, but you have to say anything that I write down. Yeah. Deal. Slurs included. It's a comedy show, bro. Chris Rock. If you don't like comedy, you can just not show up. True.
Starting point is 00:37:11 That's true. Fuck. We need a Netflix special. Sass's special is just called The N Word. Looking N Word. It's one second long. 93 million downloads? There's a guy on twitter who's claiming
Starting point is 00:37:27 he's never been ratioed so let's just get him real quick oh you found him can you uh can one of you go to jose reformed no underscore
Starting point is 00:37:37 jose underscore reformed and then that top one what does this just reply what does this Just reply What does this ratio shit mean Block equals own Yeah let's not do that From pick central
Starting point is 00:37:53 Damn I know where Where should we let him live No Yeah fuck him Roast his ass Block equals own Is like the worst bio I've ever heard We let him live. No. Yeah, fuck him. Roast his ass. Block equals own is like the worst bio I've ever heard. Yeah, that is bad.
Starting point is 00:38:12 Wait, is there a new remove follower button? It means like if you get blocked, that's an own for you. How would you know? How do you even know at the end of the day? What does this flagship mean? No, no, not the flagship, man. No, no, not that. Why that, Kyle? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:38:23 It was just the top one. Oh, yeah. Wait, why don't we try and ratio the one where he talks about a ratio? Or is that in his bio? He just flaunted it in his bio. Oh, yeah. What does this ratio mean? Yeah, so what does this ratio mean?
Starting point is 00:38:32 Okay, that's cool. How did you find that? Or no, or do you do... What does the flagship mean? Hold on. It's a red flag. That's it? So people are pointing red flags out.
Starting point is 00:38:42 Yeah. It's like a meme. Should we put some flags after it? Yeah, no. So we shouldn't say, this isn't a are pointing red flags out. Yeah. It's like a meme. Should we put some flags after it? Yeah, no. Someone shouldn't say, this isn't a ratio of red flag. I think we're just... His bio says that he's never been ratioed. I just want him to remove it.
Starting point is 00:38:55 I want him to remove it from the bio. I think that's good. How did you find this person? Why don't you just say, rewrite your bio or something like that. Edit your bio. Oh, yeah. You could do that. Edit your bio. Yeah, just edit your bio. Oh, yeah, you could do that. Edit your bio?
Starting point is 00:39:05 Yeah, just edit your bio. Yeah, yeah. Ratio plus KYS. That actually sounds nice. Oh, yeah, no, just write L plus ratio plus edit your bio. Edit your bio, douchebag. L plus ratio plus equals edit your bio. Ah, no, let's just say edit your bio. Ah, nah,
Starting point is 00:39:25 let's just say edit your bio. We're overthinking this. Should we call him a name like a douchebag? Is it? Yeah, that's a big thing
Starting point is 00:39:31 in the ratio community. Sas speaks internet. Yeah, he does. So we're hitting him with an equation. Bozo, yo,
Starting point is 00:39:36 let's go TJ. And KB just got turned on. Everything reminds me of her. Fire away. Yes. Bye. Bye, bitch. Bye-bye.
Starting point is 00:39:57 And let's just keep refreshing his page. Oh, no. Six already? Oh, no. Bye-bye Easy six. Oh, no. Bye-bye. Oh, people got to it before us. Oh, bye-bye.
Starting point is 00:40:10 Well, we workshopped it for like five minutes. Yeah, we did workshop it. How did you find him, KB? A good friend of the program DM'd his account to me. Was he the clown's ex? Is he like a stoolie or no?
Starting point is 00:40:24 He's just a random person. DM the act. Everybody is. True. Viva. Bye-bye, Jose. Some just don't know it yet. Yo, and he likes football.
Starting point is 00:40:35 Was he Colombian? Oh, my God. Those replies are rolling in. Oh, jeez. What flag is that going to be? He's getting his ass lit up. No likes. What a douchebag. He's going to be? He's getting his ass lit up. No likes. What a douchebag.
Starting point is 00:40:48 This is going to be the greatest. If somebody likes that, we block them from the yak. Yeah. Don't think about liking his tweet. Holy shit. This is awesome. It's a bloodbath. This is incredible.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Run it up. Run it up. Run it up. Run it up. Run it up. Run that shit up. Fuck this guy. Run it up. Run it up. Run that shit up. Run that shit up. Fuck this guy.
Starting point is 00:41:06 I'm cold in here. Oh, man. We want the greatest ratio of all time. Oh, my God. I feel like I'm watching a stock price skyrocket or something. I don't fucking know how a stock market works. Oh, three likes. Block them.
Starting point is 00:41:23 Sorry, John Hammett. Sorry, Jordan. Block equals owned. Block them. Sorry, John Hammett. Sorry, Jordan. Block equals owned. Own them. Owned. They can't do it. Block them.
Starting point is 00:41:33 TJ, you dog. Owned. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye.
Starting point is 00:41:40 Thank you for coming. Bozo. Take this block Bozo Bye bye Nutty Sorry you lost that Oh two more Five likes He has 23 likes
Starting point is 00:41:51 Oh no Oh no See the lines on us They want to pop up They want to pop up on the On the Axe No Bozos
Starting point is 00:42:02 Take this L Bye bye Oh no Bye bye Bozos, take this L. What? Bye-bye. Oh, no. Pay bye. Damn it. Drop the hammer, TJ. Do it. Block him.
Starting point is 00:42:14 Block him. Can we edit our logo so it's the yak with redacted? Got my ass blocked. Sorry, son. Damn. Bye-bye. Red, son. Bye-bye. Redact it. Redact it.
Starting point is 00:42:36 Oh, no. Shout out to Bozo Cat. Oh, no. Someone's going to be on it right away. Wait, the first person that gets it is on the show. Yeah. Make an account. You get to be on the right away. Two seconds. Wait, the first person that gets it is on the show.
Starting point is 00:42:45 Yeah. Make an account. You get to be on the show. See how fast they work. We'll paint your face. Just DM us. Follow it. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:42:52 It doesn't exist yet. It will. Keep refreshing. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Freaking bozo. Bozo.
Starting point is 00:43:03 I hate these bozos. They're not sturdy. They're not sturdy like the boys in here Damn That was exhilarating That was intoxicating Yeah it is How many more of these can we find? Yeah who else is
Starting point is 00:43:17 I think we should try and ratio someone really big TJ did you just tweet that from the act? If Barstool Big Cat replies this, we will give each of our followers $50. We can't. Whoopsies. Yeah, let's try and do it. Let's try and get Anna Kendricks.
Starting point is 00:43:35 She might be gettable. But she probably doesn't tweet enough for us to be able to do it. It has to be a recent tweet. You think? Yeah. But I feel like if we draw attention to it, then we could kind of tip the scales ourselves because no one else would be naturally liking her tweet. Oh, do we have a Barstool Bozo cat? TJ, block him.
Starting point is 00:43:52 Block his ass! You fool! Bye-bye! Bye-bye! You walked right into that one, bitch! We should erase you at home first. Oh, shit. You walked right into that one, bitch.
Starting point is 00:44:06 No, no, no. Bozo, fuck that. Fucking Bozo. Oh, sorry. Hand jobs on bets. Man, this shit is fucking... I love the internet, man. It's wild.
Starting point is 00:44:19 Did you see the Yak prep sheet 2.0? Made a Yak family feud with Yak listeners? Oh. Wow. The community is strong. The community is strong. I love it.
Starting point is 00:44:30 Oh, this guy. Hold on. Here we go. Can you pull up the answers that he had again? He sent me the answers. He's going to record it and send it to you, so we'll maybe have him on tomorrow. But here are the questions. If we can get Bunny Bus back up.
Starting point is 00:44:51 On a scale of 1 to 10, when you look in the mirror... Oh, my God. Oh, that was the question? How hot are you? On a scale of 1 to 10, when you look in the mirror, how much do you like what you see? He said 10. 10. He said 10.
Starting point is 00:45:04 Did you say 5 or 6? You say 6. And 8 was the top answer He said ten. He said ten. Did you say five or six? You say six. And eight was the top answer, they said. Look at Jerry. What's up, Jerry? I like the low tops from Jerry. Yeah, those shorts. You want to sit down?
Starting point is 00:45:15 I see some ankle, brother. He looks just like a wrestler. Come on in. Come on in. Come on in. Grab a seat, Jerry. Come on in. Calabria.
Starting point is 00:45:23 Yeah, it's your favorite show. You keep saying that I feel like you're joking with us You gotta start stretching Jerry You're looking a little tight When you walk Pull it back up Yeah
Starting point is 00:45:30 Training Pull it back up Name So it's on a scale One to ten When you look in the mirror How much do you like What you see
Starting point is 00:45:34 Ten The other person said Eight And got fifteen Name a sport you can play Indoor and outdoor Lacrosse Name something you feel
Starting point is 00:45:44 Self conscious about doing alone. Singing. That's the only time you do. Yeah. What? It's the only time you sing. Going to the movies is actually a good answer.
Starting point is 00:45:54 He only likes to sing in front of other people. He feels weird. I've never practiced. Name your dog's favorite food. Burgers. Burgers. And then fill in the blank, follow your dream.
Starting point is 00:46:07 So he probably got a good score on that. Yeah, that was, oh, okay. I don't think he knows that Family Feud is generalizing to the public and not just your individual answers. Yeah. So World of Isaac cut it off before he could get the last answer correct. That's right. World of Isaac was manipulative there.
Starting point is 00:46:23 I just like the fact that this guy sucked and then just went on Twitter and just got angry at everyone. That's something you should do. It wasn't as embarrassing as I thought. No. I mean, those were all his... Lacrosse and 10. Those were all his personal number one answers.
Starting point is 00:46:36 Yes. Yeah, lacrosse and 10 were the worst ones. Oh, here comes Brandon. A haircut shouldn't feel that relaxing, but it does at Sport Clip Haircuts. Change your bio, Jose. Change your bio, bitch. Reply.
Starting point is 00:46:53 Can you please unblock me so I can retweet that? Yeah, yeah. Do it now. Yeah. Bozo's so fucking good, TJ. Bozo is good Thank you Unblock me so I can
Starting point is 00:47:07 Retreat that real quick That's because stylists Don't just wash your hair They use a seven pressure point Massaging shampoo technique That is so relaxing You melt in your seat And the hot steam towel
Starting point is 00:47:18 Oh yeah It's infused with tea tree oil And perfectly steamed Leaving you feeling like You just left a Swedish sauna. And to top it off, you get a pinpoint cut. Stop by Sport Clips today and ask for the MVP haircut experience. It's
Starting point is 00:47:32 ridiculously relaxing. Sport Clips, the pros of men's hair. I got an update on the girl who jiggled her titties on the Family Feud from Mike Wilholt. He DM'd me. The Family Feud titty bitch went to jail for meth.
Starting point is 00:47:47 So she parties. No way. Let's watch that again. Wow. You're worried that they weren't big naturals? You think they're unnatural? How could a girl who does meth have such a high
Starting point is 00:48:04 fat percentage on her body? Facts. Facts. That's my question. You know what I mean? Yeah. Some places. Hey, Jer.
Starting point is 00:48:14 Look at his tits, Jer. Oh, yeah. This truck. He was really trying to do it just to himself? Yeah, I think so. I love when guys in big dress shirts embarrass themselves. Me too. It's more funny.
Starting point is 00:48:33 Jerry Springer. All Jerry Springer. My boy Sneddy wears the biggest dress shirts. Sneddy? Big tuck day dress shirts. Big dress shirts and also weird colored dress shirts. Purple. Like yellow.
Starting point is 00:48:42 Purple, yeah. With armpits. Lime green. My boy Sneddy wore this to a wedding. Oh my God. Big dress shirts. Purple. Like yellow. Purple, yeah. With armpits. Lime green. My boyfriend wore this to a wedding. Oh my God. Big dress shirt. I feel like Balenciaga just sells that though. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:52 For like $1,200. You could just get a big dress shirt. I have a squeak in my shoe by the way. Can we hear it? Let's hear it. Put it up to the mic. We have hardwood. Show Owen that clip again.
Starting point is 00:49:06 Thanks. So you think that guy was just thinking onomatopoeias? It's air. Whoa. I hear it. You hear it? Yeah. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:49:21 That's annoying. Oh, there it is. Yeah, you're deflated. Brother. Okay, I'm hearing it now There's a hole somewhere What are we gonna do? Find the hole And patch it up
Starting point is 00:49:32 Good thing you only wear Pairs of shoes once Then throw them away He's like Allen Iverson Oh look There's gas You need to get that Patched up like a bike tire
Starting point is 00:49:41 It's really annoying Yeah it's very annoying I can't hear you coming Sounds like you were I don't know. I can hear you coming. Sounds like you were... I don't know if anyone can hear you coming. What? Whoa. Everyone, shh.
Starting point is 00:49:50 Close your eyes, Sass. I know. Close your eyes. Close your eyes. I can hear it. Close your eyes. Sass. Close your eyes.
Starting point is 00:49:57 Close your eyes. Are they closed? All right. Die, bro! it closed? Alright. Just like I fucking said. Okay, but that's only in a scenario when it's completely quiet. I did hear you coming, and I actually take back everything I said. I think I would be able to hear you
Starting point is 00:50:18 coming from outside, too. Yeah, he comes like that. Yeah, bro, you're always coming. It's like the Arnold Schwarzenegger. Whenever I lift, I'm coming. Jose just tweeted, I'm coming in the bedroom. I've been ratioed.
Starting point is 00:50:33 Good man. Admirable man. All right, Jose. You're in our show now. Oh, wait, no. He pinned, I've never been ratioed. Wait, what? I read it wrong.
Starting point is 00:50:44 Wait, what? What the fuck? Yes, you have. We just ratioed your ass, you fuck. Never been ratioed. Wait, what? I read it wrong. Wait, what? What the fuck? Yes, you have. We just ratioed your ass, you fuck. Never been ratioed. Change the bio. What, did he block us? No, he can't have blocked this. Zero jobs? Zero jobs.
Starting point is 00:51:00 Random guy with verified account ratioing me. We all have one job. So we have, as a combined unit, seven jobs. Seven jobs. You got, yes. Jerry, do you still have two jobs for a living? I do, actually. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:51:12 So we have eight jobs for seven men. We're flush with jobs. Holy shit. We give you a job. You need a job, buddy? I can take my old job. We literally have extra jobs. We're averaging 1.2 jobs per person.
Starting point is 00:51:23 Start digging some holes. Start doing some math, Bozo. Jerry, we can hear you coming, too, because you got that chain. Oh, yeah. This thing. Love it. Yeah. What's the card?
Starting point is 00:51:37 What's the landing? Yeah, just get in the building. Oh, that's smart. You should always have it. VIP pass. You don't want to carry a wallet around. I don't even have a card. They took one away.
Starting point is 00:51:45 Really? Why? I had three. He's doing barstool gold tours under the table. You do not want to come in here on a Saturday. Sass is having happy hours. A lot of different stoolies. Charging people through the nose.
Starting point is 00:52:00 This is Big Cat's pile. You promised us we'd meet Feidelberg. Yeah, no, that's not happening. Can we watch the Family Feud Mommy clip? What's the Family Feud Mommy clip? Unless you guys don't want to. I don't think anything's going on. Literally nothing.
Starting point is 00:52:18 What are you seeing? This must be firing day. Oh, fuck. You're right, it is. That would suck if one of us got fired today Before the live show Yeah what do you do Live event Lisa just slides into the seat
Starting point is 00:52:33 Just can talk with us Live event's gonna be there right Uh 50-50 She doesn't have to come What about her protege Brandon No that's um That's not live about her protege, Grandin? No, that's not live events protege. That's Kelsey's.
Starting point is 00:52:49 Kelsey. Kelsey's protege. Kelsey's protege. The girl's twerking. What do you see out there? Not just the receptionist. She was twerking. Her name's Ebony.
Starting point is 00:52:58 Ebony. Have you seen her toes, though? Have you seen her phalanges? No. Is that something you might be interested in? She was supposed to show me them yesterday, actually. Really? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:09 She was going to, but then she's like, they're painted white. Has she gotten submissions since yesterday? Wait, does that mean she fucks? That means she's a good pussy. Who's had more submissions? KB over his whole wrestling career or you yesterday? I've had a lot. All right, Jerry.
Starting point is 00:53:28 Did you really like a lot of girls sending the personal pictures? Well, he runs a contest. Jerry's not just some nobody. Was there lotion play? There wasn't lotion play on that one, right, Sass? No. None. Would you ever show them a lotion play?
Starting point is 00:53:43 Those eyes. Those eyes are just incredible. Piercing. They're like the fucking ocean. Oh, my God. What if that's what that Lana Del Rey song is about, the security guard's eyes? You can just get lost in them. He's got lotion eyes.
Starting point is 00:53:58 Do you think they like having the desk, or do you think they liked it more when they were just freely walking? Oh, he's drinking a Gatorade? Oh, look at those. Look at those eyes. Those eyes are piercing. They're gorgeous. They're gorgeous. No, he just did content for the first time.
Starting point is 00:54:15 He did the Goobier games. He played our guard. We needed a football guard. Oh, awesome. He showed us how to— I love these guys. I think they're too about the shotgun. They got like a— Just random guys? No, I think they're too about the shotgun. They got like a...
Starting point is 00:54:25 Just random guys? No, they're... I think they're all ex-cops. Oh, okay. From Staten Island. Yeah. Or no, Long Island. From The Rock.
Starting point is 00:54:32 No, from The Rock. Are they from The Rock? Yeah. The Rock? They're great guys. What time is the show tonight? Whatever. 8 o'clock.
Starting point is 00:54:42 Yeah, whenever we feel like it. We're going to have everyone show up at 8, but we probably won't get there. We're going on at midnight. What if we go on early? What if we go on before everyone gets there and they're like, oh, show's over. Then you can just play a replay. Yeah, they could just run it back or syndicate it or something like that.
Starting point is 00:54:57 We're going to rap battle tonight. Sass has just been learning the rock song so he can rap. Give us a piece. All right, I gotta run. All right, take it easy. Get Edwin in here. Actually, get Chicken Fry in here.
Starting point is 00:55:10 Chicken Fry? You want Chicken Fry? Send in Chicken Fry. Where's Chicken Fry? He just walked out the whole way. Oh, yeah, yeah. Would you like Chicken Fry?
Starting point is 00:55:16 What do you want with her? Why? No, what do you want out of her? Why? Why do you want to bring her on the program? Why?
Starting point is 00:55:24 She's not going to be happy. So? She hates us. She does hate us. Alright, we'll get to the bottom of that. Jesus Christ. We're not going to get anywhere. You hate her. Sounds like you hate her. I don't hate her. She's always disgusted when she comes
Starting point is 00:55:39 in this room. Why? Do you think that she's too successful to talk to you? I don't know. Apparently she's making them talk talk to you no apparently she's making them talk to her her rep edwin the tiktok uh the tiktok intermediary jerry are you on tiktok yet what's up she gets a raise she makes on the yeah she does way down like 10 30 percent raise jerry i saw the video that you put out with Marty yesterday where it talked about the stairway and where your mom found you and everything. I thought that that was a very revelatory video. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:56:15 Appreciate it. I thought it was really nice. I thought that you kind of opened up a different side of yourself. For sure. And I thought that that was nice to see. For sure. Brianna, how are you? How are you guys?
Starting point is 00:56:24 You're pumped. I'm pumped? Yeah. Come on this guys? You're pumped. I'm pumped? Yeah. Come on this program. Oh, yeah. I'm super pumped. This is the best day of my life. KB thinks that, I don't know, you hate us.
Starting point is 00:56:31 I hate you guys? Yeah. I told him that it was ludicrous. Why would you say that, KB? I said you hate coming on the show. Why? I've only been on... Well, I came on one time and you guys tried to ruin me.
Starting point is 00:56:42 True. Yeah, and you hated that probably. I hated that. Yeah, what the fuck? Why did you hate that? I hated that so much. Well, why don't we try and rectify that today and try and build you back up or something like that? Yeah, build me up then.
Starting point is 00:56:51 Let's build you up. You've got to play Feud. You've got to play Feud? Yeah, just one quick game. One quick game of Feud. Okay. Is that fair? That's fair.
Starting point is 00:56:58 What school won the contest? I still have many schools left. Who's in the lead? Penn State. It would be a shame if Yak listeners spammed UTEP. Chicken Friday UTEP. How do you... We're sending you to El Paso.
Starting point is 00:57:15 I'll come with. Okay. Okay, KB. What is the contest? Where she'll go on the tour. Are you mansplaining her contest? Yeah. Jeez. Yeah, he is. And you know a lot. No, we're just... We're picking schools go on the tour. Are you mansplaining her contest? Yeah. Jeez Louise.
Starting point is 00:57:25 You know a lot. We're just picking schools for our next tour. And the top comment gets one of the schools. And the comment on what? Doesn't matter. I don't want you to be poised. We're the Jose
Starting point is 00:57:41 reformed you. I see why you don't like Coming on this show Yeah You and KB I feel like you need Some kind of reconciliation No I just don't think
Starting point is 00:57:51 She's comfortable here I'm not comfortable Why don't you try to Make her more comfortable I don't know She looks pretty relaxed Yeah she is I'm pretty relaxed
Starting point is 00:57:56 You make me uncomfortable Sometimes KB That's fair That's honest Can you put your hand out Brianna Can you put your hand out Oh it's vibrating.
Starting point is 00:58:05 Oh, you do? Yeah. Oh, that's not bad. I do, actually. Early onset. That's fire. Yeah. Wow, Nick.
Starting point is 00:58:12 It's not a joke. Nick, you're a massive dickhead. Feel good, Nick? This is awkward. This is fucked up. It's not awkward at all. I have shaky hands, too, but they say it's just like a tremor. Yours are probably worse.
Starting point is 00:58:23 Mine's only my right hand shaking, not my left. Doesn't it look shaky? It's been like this my whole life. You're making it shake. I swear to God I'm not. You're holding it as still as you can? No way. I swear to God. Cap detected.
Starting point is 00:58:40 It's been like this my entire life. You look like you're playing air piano. Yeah. They say it's just like nerve damage or something. I don't know. Who's that? Gone to the doctor's like 15 times. About your shaky hands.
Starting point is 00:58:52 No, me too. I had to keep going because I was so shaky. Really? My non-binary doctor. Is there a remedy to it? Is there anything that you could do to offset the early onset? Nope. They have like bracelets that like...
Starting point is 00:59:04 Jerry, what do you think of shaky feet? Are they fly? No, they're not fly. I don't like that. Look at me. Nary a tremble. That's cool. Is Jerry on the show every day now?
Starting point is 00:59:14 No, just intermittently. Have you met Jerry? Whenever somebody's out, Brianna. Oh, cool. No, we've never really officially met. I'm Jerry. I'm very nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.
Starting point is 00:59:23 Any preconceived notions of each other? What do you know about Brianna? I like your wristbands. You know about Jerry's. I'm Jerry. I'm very nice to meet you. Any preconceived notions of each other? What do you know about Rihanna? I like your wristbands. You know about Jerry. Those are cool. Yeah, I just, I see me on TikTok, and the videos are good videos. Thank you. Very nice.
Starting point is 00:59:33 And you had, like, a full spread in the post. Is that where it was? Yeah. Congratulations, Rihanna. Thanks, guys. Thank you. Great spread. Good read.
Starting point is 00:59:43 Thank you. Let's play Family Feud so you can get out of here. We'll put you out of your misery. Okay, thank you. But the only person you don't hate, yeah, you hate, KB. Yes. Perfectly fine with me. That's fair.
Starting point is 00:59:55 That's way better. And Nick, when he makes insensitive comments about early onset Parkinson's. I didn't know about your Parkinson's, but I'm not going to treat you any differently. Thank you. That makes me feel good. That's very nice of you. Name something that is carried in a tanker truck. Oil.
Starting point is 01:00:07 Oil. Good answer. Very good answer. Name something that is carried in a tanker truck. I have to go again? Yeah, it's you. 50 seconds. You can phone a friend. Jerry, you want to hop in?
Starting point is 01:00:19 Jerry, you can't help. Ammunition. What? That's a tank. A tanker truck? What about gas? Gas. Gas.
Starting point is 01:00:30 Gas. Gas. Gasoline. Oh, I didn't know that's different from oil. Me either. Okay, what else? What else? Name something carried in a tanker truck.
Starting point is 01:00:37 25 seconds. What's a tanker truck? Like a military truck? No, like one of the big metal trucks with the long silver tube on the back. Oh, okay. Yeah, water. Water sounds good. Water.
Starting point is 01:00:49 Water. Okay, great answer. One more. What about a spare tire? Yeah, we can try it. Spare tire. Single spare tire. Spare air.
Starting point is 01:00:57 Spare tire. Okay, okay. That's on me. Jerry, 0 for 2. Four seconds. Three seconds. This is a good round, though. Even without getting the last one.
Starting point is 01:01:04 You did good, Brian. Thank you. That's a very good round. Milk. Did KB say milk? That's crazy. I said. Three seconds. This is a good round, though. You did good, Brian. That's a very good round. Milk. Did KB say milk? That's crazy. I said milk. You did say milk. That was a joke. Tied up. These holes are skewed. Valerie's really good, too. You have three rounds.
Starting point is 01:01:19 This is a double point round. Double points. Name something you'd hate to find out a co-worker has that's bigger than yours. Penis. Penis. Penis. Good answer. Really?
Starting point is 01:01:31 Salary. Salary. Big wife. Big wife. Big wife. House. Good answer. Good answer.
Starting point is 01:01:38 Good answer. That was good. Jerry, hop in. Wait, bigger. Come on. Someone hop in. Bigger. Maybe a bigger car. Car. Big hop in. Maybe a bigger car.
Starting point is 01:01:46 Big car. Everyone loves a big car. Really? What? Big house in the suburbs. Astro van. Should we try penis again? I feel like penis would have been...
Starting point is 01:01:54 Genitals? Bigger. Watch. Wallet. No, wallet. Try cock. Yeah, try cock. Ah. It's going to be throbbing cock. Yeah, probably throbbing cock. Yeah, try cock. Ah.
Starting point is 01:02:06 But still a three. Yeah, probably throbbing cock. Three is pretty good, though. Oh, IQ. Yeah, that makes sense. All right, one more round. One more round. For the rest of your life.
Starting point is 01:02:19 We're winning. We're winning. This is great. This is great news. All right, triple points. This is the biggest round. Name something starting with the letter B that a man might teach his dog to fetch. A ball.
Starting point is 01:02:30 Ball. Good answer. Good answer. Thank you. Okay, keep going. Keep going. B, B, B, B. B.
Starting point is 01:02:35 What the? Dogs fetch a B. Bird. Bird. Yeah. Fetch that bird. A beer? Oh, a beer.
Starting point is 01:02:43 A beer. Yes. Good answer. Good answer. Beer, a beer. A beer. Yes, good answer. Good answer. Beer. Two more. 38 seconds. Is there another name for a stick?
Starting point is 01:02:51 No. Perhaps a branch? A branch. Okay. Nick, that's cheating. Good job, Nick. Oh, wow. Think throbbing cock again.
Starting point is 01:02:59 Yeah, maybe. Yeah. Throbbing cock? Boner. Not close. Boat. Very close. Bone. Bone.
Starting point is 01:03:05 Bone. This is hard on the spot. I'm not good at this. That's okay. Guys, I'm really not. I think you're going to wind up winning. That's three of the top answers. Jerry, hop in.
Starting point is 01:03:16 Just say a word that begins with B. Bread. Yes. Yes. I can't even think of B words on the spot. I can't. What would it be? Good answers, though.
Starting point is 01:03:24 That was very good answers across the board. Keys. Bathrobe. Fuck you. That's so fucking dumb. That's so stupid. That's just not true. Did we win?
Starting point is 01:03:32 We won. Where's Biggie? Fast Money. Fast Money. This is Fast Money. Oh, this is the hard one. This is the hard one. Okay.
Starting point is 01:03:38 But this is a good one. Most people don't get the Fast Money. You're in the top echelon of players now. Name something that's really, really hairy. Steve Harvey is gross for this one. Head. Head. Head.
Starting point is 01:03:49 Good answer. Name something you might hurt yourself riding on. Steve. A horse. Horse is a better answer. It's a paradox. Name a place dogs are known to drink from. Where do dogs drink from?
Starting point is 01:04:02 Bowl. Water bowl? No. Yeah. I mean. Bowl. I'd? No. Yeah. I mean. Bowl. I'd say bowl. Bowl.
Starting point is 01:04:07 Toilet. Name something specific that gets brushed. What gets brushed? Hair again. Hair. Hair. Hair, yes.
Starting point is 01:04:13 This is a hairy one. This might be a perfect Fast Money. Name a three-letter word that's a child's favorite thing. T-I-T. T-I-T. Toy.
Starting point is 01:04:22 Toy. Toy. Toy's better. Yeah, toy's better Good answers This might be a perfect Let's see if you did better than Vinny Hack
Starting point is 01:04:29 Ape Gorilla Ape Gorilla There we go Bowl 31 Toilet Okay Great answer
Starting point is 01:04:39 Hair Toy Alright Nice That was good Very. That was good. That was good. That was fantastic. Thank you so much
Starting point is 01:04:48 for coming in. Of course. And Jose Reformed went private. We win. He went private? Yeah. He went private.
Starting point is 01:04:57 Thank you, Brianna. Alright. Great job, Brianna. See ya. Fantastic. Take it easy. Should we wrap it the fuck up?
Starting point is 01:05:07 Should we just stay live until the show? Yeah, I think we can keep going prep for tonight's show we can do it now let's do the prep let's just do the prep for the show tonight where the hell what is big cat doing i know what is that guy fucking up he's about to like go invade a fucking cia yeah yeah he looks like a ninja. You say ninja? And I don't want to be on the show anymore. Wait, is this bio? No, liar. Lier. Everybody ratioed XX? Is that the...
Starting point is 01:05:32 He's got tactical straps hanging down from him. What the hell? Can we show Big Cat quick? Oh, Big Cat's Antifa. He is Antifa. Oh my god, it all makes sense now. Big Cat's about to leave a bunch of bricks outside of a construction site. Come in here, Big Cat.
Starting point is 01:05:49 What a fucking sneak. Where is he? Is that an impossible angle? Wait, Jet Ski's talking to Tico Texas. Oh, wow. Wait, is that Nate standing up in that background? Fresh shave on Nate? No.
Starting point is 01:06:11 That's a coat rack. Oh, sheesh. That's Chuck Nateso. That's Chuck. That's Chuck Nateso. Emrags. Emrags. All right, let's bet on the next person that walks around that pillar.
Starting point is 01:06:23 I'm going to say Marty Marsh. Jack Mack. Give me Riley Collins. I'm going to say Marty Mush. Jack Mack. Give me Riley Collins. Give me Liz. Give me Jake Malasek. I got Jack Mack. I'm going to go with Ben Mintz. He almost was there.
Starting point is 01:06:37 Oh, no. Oh, you saw the limp. You saw the limp. Oh, no. That was awesome. That was fun. Do you feel like it was David? The boss man.
Starting point is 01:06:50 Oh, jeez. All right, go ahead. It's following today's title. It's definitely firing day. No, I think he probably just didn't get the raise he wanted. Just walked out of there because he's dejected. Oh, shit. Oh, he's grabbing something from the pile.
Starting point is 01:07:02 Dude, have you guys ever seen... He's going full Antifa. No way. What if Big Cat gets let go on firing day and they dilute his shares? He is completely undercut. What the hell is going on? That's how Big Cat dresses whenever he's off camera.
Starting point is 01:07:17 People don't know that. He wears glasses and his whole Antifa. He's like an old man at a baseball game. Whoa! KB, what's up with... Is everyone up? Moving around. Yeah, what's going on here? What's up with what?
Starting point is 01:07:33 What's up with you and Bree? I don't know. I think it was the first time you came on the Yak. There was tension. I know. What the fuck is up with her? But I feel like you don't want to pop the tension.
Starting point is 01:07:46 I feel like you like living in the tension. I just didn't want to make her do something she didn't want to do. Like what? Come on the show. But why don't you just make it easier for her to come on the show? Why don't you guys just get along? Let's make her get along. Send her to UTEP.
Starting point is 01:08:03 That would make us get along. She'd have to bring you. I think it's her Instagram. You guys can find it. I've been trying all day to... There's like a thought in my head that I just can't get out of my head. And it's like, you know how British people say albino? They say albino.
Starting point is 01:08:19 Yeah, I didn't know that. Albino. Albino. I didn't know that. Albino. Albino. And so what if... If know that. Albino. Albino. And so what if – If you're going to say something funny, why don't you go ahead and save it for tonight?
Starting point is 01:08:29 Yeah, true. True. We're burning out, dude. Yeah, we have nothing left. It's not going to be funny. All right, let's do it now. I bet it is. No, it's like if KB had a brother and his name was Al.
Starting point is 01:08:41 Albino. Albino. Albino. Can we go now can we go run that back though actually yeah definitely run that back
Starting point is 01:08:49 no no way but definitely run back the thing about we'll run the if you're listening please just keep the
Starting point is 01:08:55 if you're listening no you're not we should have been mining this show we should have been mining this show for content over the last couple weeks
Starting point is 01:09:01 yeah for just like what's a funny ass now we got big cat so all we're gonna have to do is go take pictures of people that listen to our podcasts but they're gonna be with big cat yeah yeah that'll be sweet well like if they're like hey do you mind taking this picture type of type of situation will be right there with a iphone 13 super high def um come to the look at big cat he looks like a basketball writer yeah yeah
Starting point is 01:09:25 NBA journalist what the fuck oh he's fast he's quick oh fuck come to our show tonight yeah
Starting point is 01:09:34 that'll be all that's it that'll be all that'll be all. It's the act. Thank you.

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