The Yak - Big Cat Gives KB an AMAZING Birthday Surprise | The Yak 1-26-24
Episode Date: January 26, 2024KB All SwagYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Hello, it's the Yak.
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Happy birthday, Kyle.
Did you think I wasn't going to say happy birthday to gonna say i kind of had been shunning you
you wanted to save it yeah thank you so much i have a surprise oh my god i have a surprise
kyle is the hardest man in the world to buy something for agreed i had a hell of a morning
trying to figure it out okay at one point i was gonna buy you an air fryer and then i was
like he'll be like what the fuck like you think i'm gonna get fat i looked at a 700 scooter
and then i had the thought that like if you get hit by a car while riding this then i'll
never forgive myself yeah i get it i would have loved that by the way and the air fryer to be honest really you
would have liked the air fryer yeah okay well i did get you a mystery box oh created by myself
okay wow and let's just put out there that i again you were very hard to buy for so it was
kind of a pray and spray situation okay this. This is items that you purchased or you gathered.
But the mystery box itself is more of the present than whatever's in it.
Yeah.
Right.
Because there's a lot of random things.
Not knowing what.
Yeah.
No, I love that.
Okay.
Yeah.
I'm a fan of the gamble.
Yes.
All right.
So Paige, I think Paige will, I'll text her right now.
She'll bring it in.
But I wanted you to have a special birthday of mystery box.
That means a lot. Yes. I was very excited that, I mean, you. But I wanted you to have a special birthday of Mystery Box.
That means a lot.
Yes.
I was very excited.
You know I love you.
I don't want to get sent out. And we all participated in this.
I love you guys.
I actually, Mark and Brandon did nothing for this.
While we were alive, while you were putting it together.
And I want to just say it on the record,
I kept the receipt in case you want to return anything.
Once you see the number of how much money I spent,
your eyes are going to pop out of your head jesus christ yeah and mark and brandon
we did we chipped in no we chipped in dan dan said i'm gonna do this and i was like that's a
great idea that was my i said ditto yeah hey thank you guys you know you guys can get him you get him
the sunlamp done yeah go ahead sunlamp on now i guess the sunlamp uh i think that was just the
weed withdrawals to to be honest.
Okay.
Back to normal.
It could still.
I walked into Best Buy and I asked for a sun lamp,
and they looked at me like I was the dumbest person in the world.
Yeah, is that a thing?
I was like, you know, a lamp that mimics the sun, and they're like, what?
So, yeah, that sucked.
That was a bad experience.
You actually tried to get the sun lamp?
I did try.
Is this a common thing?
I don't know.
Oh, the second, the actual Google that pops up is sun lamp for seasonal depression yeah yeah maybe it would help
that's an auto film i can do that on the own some the what on my own hey i have a question uh while
we wait for the mystery box i was out yesterday um brandon this guy vince mcmahon is he important to wrestling he was uh back in the
day it's been a while fan of him come on in page come on in page you're a really big fan yeah
mystery box mystery box mystery box was he uh was he important to the history of wrestling back
early in the 80s and stuff uh now when you when you told me last week there's never been a better time to get into wwe is this what you had in mind well he's not
really affiliated with wwe anymore he's been out for a while so he's not okay he's not really a
key figure anymore at all oh that's weird because i saw him on the new york stocks exchange two days
ago huh i don't believe that's true with the rock you're a rock guy the actor you're a rock guy hey
he's fine so the rock and vince mcmahon are close friends well the rock once worked for
like i work for dave portnoy but all the shit he does that's not got nothing yeah but stone cold
really like he was like fuck the man like i, if anything. Oh, but they were laughing about it.
Yeah.
Yeah, Stone Cold.
He's on the right side of history.
Oh, but they were chumming it up.
Stone Cold saw this the whole time.
They were chumming it up behind the scenes.
Stone Cold.
How were they chumming it up?
He flipped his boss off live on television.
He brought out a fucking beer truck.
They were counting their money.
They were in lockstep.
They were in cahoots.
I think Stone Cold just comes out on the right side of history.
Brandon Walker and The Rock.
Yep.
How's The Rock get blamed?
And Brock Lesnar, not so good.
The Rock just got named to the board of the parent company.
He's the one getting rid of this track.
He is going to end up running the whole thing.
No, Triple H runs the whole thing.
Right, but I feel like The Rock is like...
Even running the parent company?
Yeah.
He might end up running the country.
He could be a president one day.
Is it weird that The Rock and his ex-wife are...
Business partners and best friends?
Is that weird or no?
No, because I think...
I think...
No.
Okay.
So, Vince McMahon, bad guy?
The allegations are certainly bad.
It looks ugly.
I did the mistake. I i landed they were using a
woman as a sex toy we landed at 2 a.m last night and i slept a little bit on the plane after rough
and rowdy so i was a little wired when i got home and i read the whole report at 2 a.m and i was
like that was not that wasn't good piece are there multiple reports because titus had read something
i hadn't read that there's a actual shit on the head yeah there's like a court document
of shitting on her head yeah yeah that's a lot yeah that's a lot that's where you draw the line
no the line was way before that when they were using the woman as as a sex toy uh and passing
her around from and then using her as enticement to get wrestlers to sign this is all alleged
obviously so it's not good and it's a good thing that wrestling has moved past vincent man he hasn't been involved for several years now
the craziest part well he has been involved he literally just negotiated a deal for netflix
netflix poor netflix that wasn't two days i don't think no no no no he i don't think he was part of
that negotiation i think triple h and and nick khan did that he's still involved. Aren't they doing a Vince Doc Netflix? That's probably on hold now.
It does feel, I saw the court documents.
Some of the texts are pretty horrific.
Obviously, he gets his day in court, whatever.
But the timing is, like, I feel like they did the Netflix deal.
And they're like, okay, now we're finally, let's get Vince McMahon out of here.
Bad guy.
Yeah.
Maybe DJ. Bad guy. the royal rumbles tomorrow night oh yeah big weekend for wrestling and you're like cosplaying or role-playing as method acting as a villain you've been get your
haters are evolving to herculean levels yeah that was uh that's the first time i've ever actually called the cops you did yeah i did why
don't you why don't you use our security guys i've never been all right this happened four years
ago when i first got here i asked some people above me and those people told me to go fuck
myself oh okay i'm i'm telling you right now you should just talk to mike okay all right like if
there's ever an issue okay Mike handles that. Very good.
Got it.
And he is, like, very good at it.
I've had a few things pop up that he...
Okay.
Very good.
Yes.
I'll talk to Mike.
Mike will handle everything.
I'll text him after this show.
Yes.
That's a good idea.
Because he also wants to know.
Yeah.
Because he is our security.
Yeah.
No, it was just weird.
Because I photoshopped it because the guy sent me pictures of my own house.
From the internet?
From the internet.
Or that he took?
From the internet.
He's fucking around, I know, but it's still troubling.
You probably wish the worst for him.
I do.
The thing is, I think what could be worse than that?
Than being that guy?
The state that he's in right now.
It's rough.
It makes me mad.
Yeah, you're right.
You're right.
We can handle it.
That's a private thing.
He's madder and he's miserabler.
Yep.
Yep.
All right.
Fuck that guy.
Let's do the miserable.
He does watch the Yak if y'all want to say fuck that guy real quick.
Fuck that guy.
All right.
I'll say this.
Guy, we have an entire security team of NYPD, CPD, and yeah, they handle all this stuff.
So cut the shit.
Yep.
Come out, dude.
I think you're closeted.
I truly believe that.
And I'm saying this as someone who's thankful for your support.
I think you should come out.
Because at the end of the day, he is watching.
Yeah.
That does count as a view.
Yeah, that's true.
That's true.
It's kind of a slippery slope.
I'm going to follow Kyle's lead and take the high road and say,
I hope you get the help you need.
Yes.
I hope you get the help that you so obviously need.
Yeah, I think every burner account you make to hate on Brandon
is a sperm cell, a gay sperm cell that you haven't let out of your dick.
You need to just embrace who you are.
Should we do the mystery box? Yeah, for sure. Now, there's one thing that I need to just embrace who you are um should we do the mystery
box yeah for sure now there's one thing that i need to tell you about the mystery box oh
it's not a box at all no there is there's there's one thing in there that
triggers a wheel okay do you want to opt in like a physical object or item? No, it's like IOU that triggers a wheel.
Okay.
Do you want to opt in on the wheel?
Always.
Kyle is always down for the wheel.
Always.
Okay.
Yeah.
All right, so he's opted in when he gets home.
Should I get a knife or something?
You're a strong boy.
I was hoping, what I was really hoping for your birthday, Kyle,
was my dream was we ordered that wrestling mat.
I guess it takes a long time to get here.
Thank you for that so much.
Yeah, but if we had gotten the wrestling mat in time and just for Kyle's birthday just let him just wrestle all of us for like an hour and a half.
We just have to keep going back and forth.
All right, go slow.
Go slow.
There's a lot of things in there.
Oh, my.
Okay, you can pull it out.
Okay.
Sweet Mandy's cupcakes.
These are gourmet.
Yeah.
I've seen these.
So good.
On the social media.
These are amazing.
Yeah, Sweet Mandy B's cupcakes.
Shout out to Sweet Mandy B's.
A hat?
Oh.
Oh, I forgot to say.
I also bought two items that i bought specifically
because i think you'd look cute in it yeah that's one kind of fetishizing let's see yeah yeah a
little bit of fetish fetishization oh yeah yeah yeah yeah okay i think down maybe
i think down's better but maybe up better for better for the camera. I put bro glow.
Don't rip a tag off anything you don't want.
He definitely wants the bucket.
I want it.
Oh.
The string's on your nose.
Oh, I love these.
There's a top to that, too.
I want to get them right now.
Oh, a suit?
Yeah, there's a track suit.
I got you a track suit.
Oh, yeah.
Great.
Yeah.
You're going to look incredible.
Put it out in the middle so people can see.
Yeah.
I guess I realize just now that you are perpetrating with the Adidas hat and the Nike track suit.
I know.
Fuck.
Does that bucket hat have a zipper?
What?
It has a zipper.
It does have a zipper on the head.
It has a pocket in it.
To the right.
You going to put it on right now?
Go put it on.
And then we'll keep going.
Go change.
Go change.
Love.
He's going to look so awesome when he comes back.
Anything else I can put on in here?
A bunch of stuff.
You might have to do multiple put-on trips.
Yeah, you might have to put it.
There's one thing that I...
I did buy a couple things that was like,
I think he'll look good in this, and I want to see him in it.
Is there anything dangerous in it?
No.
Okay.
It was actually pure friendship.
The problem is Kyle was a hard guy to buy stuff for.
I called Nick when I was at the store, and I was just like,
what should I buy?
And he's like, he doesn't like anything.
When it comes to clothes, though, I feel like he could be easy
because he does make everything look pretty cool.
Nick said I should get him a cat, which I might still do.
We could probably pull that off within this show.
Well, Paws is coming on Tuesday because I'm giving him a big check,
so I might have them bring a tabby cat, a little tabby kitten.
I feel like that's a very –
He'd love that.
Sure.
He'd be excited.
How was the yak yesterday it was good we had it
was uh it was a white white socks dave kind of stole the last 15 minutes or 20 minutes uh with
his big shoes uh but it was it was good love it we had a stray cat yak it was we had rudy and we
had donnie and we had dave and uh danny conrad so it was uh it was good time good i did barstool
radio yesterday for a little bit. Yeah. And,
and they argued you about the merits of working on Friday.
Yeah.
We had that argument.
Huh?
Did you check in on,
uh,
Nate Fridays today?
Uh,
I wasn't able to,
cause I was getting Kyle all his gifts,
but I heard it's,
I mean,
I'm a big supporter of Nate.
I watched the beginning and it was,
uh,
it was,
it was a monologue.
It was a,
it was a heel promo.
He cut a heel promo the first three minutes.
And he was reading off Teleprompter, but he was giving it to folks.
I would describe it as avant-garde for sure.
Yeah, he was giving it to folks.
I like that.
I like that.
Yeah.
It was weird being back in the New York office.
Just because it was like, you know, so many memories there.
So it was just weird.
I haven't been back since we left.
Yeah, I mean, it was a weird i haven't been back since we left yeah i mean it
was good seeing everyone i still like everyone there so um i like four of the 30 people there
rough and rowdy was good you guys watch any of it yeah it was a good time what was the most
memorable moment from that um i think it was when we confused uh you had a mom slap. We had a mom slap, but then the best moment for me,
there was two.
Zod, did you hear Dave's line?
I had to defend you.
Oh, God, he cooked me?
No.
Wow, he's my guy.
We had the little people fight,
and one of them fell down and twisted their knee,
and I was like, oh, no, an ACL.
And Dave was like, I don't think they have any.
Oh,
come on,
Dave.
Really?
Really?
It was very like bang,
bang.
Um,
and then,
uh,
no,
there was a fight.
Oh my God.
Oh shit.
Wow.
Yes.
I was dressed.
I really,
I'm mad about the perpetrating part.
I really should have thought that through oh no i clash i don't think that's a problem okay all right all right you look good
you look good so swaggy run dmc with the tracksuit there was another moment where we had
they mixed up the fights so we just like introduced the wrong guy.
And it coincided with the fastest knockout ever in Rough and Rowdy history.
And the guy we thought we were calling for had a note under it where he's like,
I don't like my nose.
I'm hoping to get hit in the nose so I can get a new nose.
And we were sitting there like, this guy's nose is fine.
He knocks him out right away.
We're like, holy shit, this guy's nose is fine he knocks him out right away we're like
holy shit like this guy's an incredible fighter the next fight a guy walks in and he had the
biggest nose i've ever seen and we're like there's the nose and we just were like nose and just
started calling him nose so that was very funny did he get hit in the nose he didn't but we talked
to him after and he was like yeah i really need new nose. Is somebody buying the boy a new nose? I think he needs it.
Yeah, he's going to get a new nose.
Okay.
All right.
You want to, like, spread this out throughout the episode?
No, go ahead.
No, just keep going.
Let's keep going.
It looks like a big box.
I'll dress my boy.
Okay, so what is that?
Oh, yeah, this is just, this isn't even in your side, but size.
I just, I laughed when I saw it.
Duh, Fields. This isn't even in your side, but size. I laughed when I saw it. Yeah, I'm all for it.
Duh, Fields.
He's not even going to be on the Bears.
And it's also an XL, but I just saw the shirt and I was like,
this is the most low effort shirt of all time.
That does not work at all.
Duh, Fields.
Who made that?
What the fuck?
Did we make that?
I know, right? It caught my eye. Oh, this is Who made that? What the fuck? Did we make that? I know, right?
Oh, it caught my eye.
Oh, this is awesome.
Okay.
Those are women yoga pants.
You know.
I want to see your ass in them.
It's ever growing.
Yeah.
Okay.
So that's purely fetishization.
I admitted that.
I'll put them on for you.
You're up front with that.
Oh my god, Dan.
There's a lot of stuff in there.
I really appreciate it.
It's your birthday.
I need one of these. I rocked the plastic bottle.
It's the Stanley mug.
The Stanley.
It's the Stanley.
Did you get me dosy-dos?
It's a good thing that you need one of them.
One for the missus?
I got you.
I think I got you three of them.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
These are the cold mugs for women.
Yeah, and I saw it, and I was like, well, yeah, we got to get these.
Yeah, a little yellow.
Ma.
You have three Stanley mugs now.
It's like Mentos.
Oh, my God, dude.
Oh, that actually, that's for the basketball court,
but you can get credit for it.
Oh, to knock you out.
Yeah, the traction mat.
Traction mat?
Yeah, for the basketball court.
So you will put that on the basketball court when we play basketball this
afternoon, but everyone should thank you.
That's the Kyle Bauer attraction mat.
Everyone should thank you.
Cake for everyone.
Yeah.
Love it.
That's good thinking right there.
Yeah, it was.
Oh, that's actually.
Ooh, a little ankle action.
Those are for me, but you don't have to give them to me.
Yeah.
No, we can share them.
I forgot I bought two things for myself.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Appreciate it.
Hell yeah.
Oh, not the box. not the orange box oh oh my goodness when did you buy all this stuff today oh i love air max is meaning to get a new
pair hey fucking match the fit figure that was the color you like colorway love this color i love
kyle no i get it no i get it no what I'm trying to figure out is this morning you just decided to buy this and you got all this stuff?
Yeah.
Wow.
I had to get a shopping cart.
I don't know how you pulled that off.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, Jesus.
Another one.
Yeah. More. I like this colorway, too. Yeah, they're Gorere-tex so you can wear them like in the rain
and stuff blueberry oatmeal oh yeah yep these are hot those are nice those look good too
it's good mystery yeah i'm getting kind of a lot of w's in the mystery box
yeah you said it's hard to buy for but but this is all knocking it out of the park.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, my God.
A little Chicago Sky jersey.
I love this colorway, though.
There you go.
It's hot.
Is that a player?
I love it.
Yeah, Cooper?
Yep.
I don't know who Cooper is, but.
Okay.
Yeah.
One more. Box is, but... Okay. Yeah. I saw one, too.
One more.
The box is starting to get empty.
Slightly empty, yeah.
There's more stuff.
Oh, okay.
So this...
I just saw it, and I was like,
I've always wanted to see a sliding glove in person,
so I got you a sliding glove.
What is a sliding glove?
No, you're right. Baseball players wear it. I've never seen them in person. I've never seen it glove what is a sliding glove you're right small players wear
it like i've never seen them i've never seen it wait what do they do with it they wear it when
they're like on first base and they're ready to steal second yeah yeah aerodynamic i just never
seen one in real life and i was like this is cool kb needs one if he ever needs to steal second
we need a sliding area you get a couple extra inches on it, too, so you can get the bag.
I think it's the other hand.
Yep.
Look at that.
Sliding glove.
Right.
Yeah, that's great.
I know.
Had you guys ever seen one at a store? No, yeah.
They're kind of ridiculous looking.
I know.
But I had to have it.
Oh, it's a pad on top for the tag and his feet?
Yeah.
So then when you slide into second, you won't break your fingers.
I have to imagine if you're 12 years old going to Little League with a sliding glove,
you're getting bullied, right?
I don't know.
I think they think it's cool as fuck.
That's cool now?
Yeah, accessories.
You just dress like the MLB players.
That's why.
It's like when we wore fighting necklaces when we were 10.
Of course.
Let's not throw around weed.
Didn't wear a fighting necklace when those were sick the power balance wristbands no he's trying to grab the
piece of paper with your sliding cool Ben like that my boys got all types of fits. All right. Uh-oh.
All right, so this is the last piece of it.
What do we got here?
Nah.
Destination wheel?
Destination wheel.
Ooh.
Flame?
Ooh.
Wow.
Okay.
That sounds...
Flame?
You have expressed
Oh come
You're doing too much
No no
Well you don't know
You don't know
You don't know
I'm ready to gamble
You don't know
You've expressed interest
In going to a couple
Different destinations
Shit I'll go to Burkina Faso
If I have to
So I decided to put
The destinations on a wheel
And you will get a flight
To whichever place you land on.
We'll do elimination style.
Oh, my God.
They're not all great.
I know.
I hope they aren't.
Yeah.
There's a couple, though, that you got your eye on.
Oh, God.
Shit.
Do you want to do the destination wheel, TJ?
Of course.
Okay.
So we've got.
Just real quick.
Anybody else want to call out when their birthday is?
San Diego.
Puerto Rico. San Diego. My favorite city. Cai San Diego, Puerto Rico, Cairo, Illinois, Gary, Indiana, Prince Edward Island, Hawaii, Iran.
Yep.
Give Big Cat $1,000.
Beautiful.
So we got to figure out where you're going to go.
All right.
So it's elimination.
Most of all these.
I'm rooting for you to get Prince Edward Island or Hawaii.
I will go to Iran.
Oh, there's a big one.
I'm saving that for next year.
That would really cuck Rome if you went to Iran.
Is that?
That's Dave and KB in the picture?
Yeah.
Oh.
Man, I'll still make a trip.
Oh.
Not to ask for too much, but would I be able to go tomorrow?
Yeah, you can go tomorrow.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Okay, this actually is you got some you also
might be giving him a thousand dollars you could be giving me a thousand dollars
i've been meaning to for a while i don't want that oh that's the one i really do want to go
to one of those provinces but hey there's always time you definitely could go to gary indiana
tomorrow hawaii and san diego being. This is a great final four right now.
That's pretty good.
Oh, big here.
Oh, wow.
You're going somewhere.
Wow.
I don't think we've ever had Hawaii, San Diego, and Gary, Indiana on the same wheel.
Top three tourist destinations.
Wow.
I'll go to Gary.
Maybe not tomorrow, but next week.
Oh, hey.
You're going somewhere nice.
Too much.
Wow.
All right.
So best of seven.
Dude, these are my two favorite American Destinies.
So whatever hits four times
have you ever been to either side kyle what have you ever been to either i've been to san diego
but not for long enough to like truly enjoy it all right san diego is one bucket list i know i
would love it san diego San Diego has two.
If it's a sweep, you do have to piss yourself.
But that's... On the flight.
Yeah, that should be fine.
Oh!
Oh, we got a series.
Bye.
Ooh, 3-1 San Diego and that's San Diego
beautiful
KB you just let me know
I was going to go to Hawaii anyway
you let me know when you want to go to San Diego.
You can obviously, it's a plus one, too.
So you can, two air tickets to San Diego.
Just let me know.
Wow.
Happy birthday.
Happy birthday.
I'm Liam Blutman instead of my girlfriend.
That would be so awesome, but also.
Hey, you got to understand.
Happy birthday.
Thank you so much.
That was the best birthday crop of presents I've ever gotten.
Okay.
No disrespect.
My mother.
And Brandon's going to be like, well, my birthday's coming up.
I just wanted to be very clear.
This is not for everyone's birthday.
Kyle was a little down.
Yeah, there was a lot of birthdays.
I don't think Kyle uses mental health as a crutch,
so when he is down, he's actually down.
So I was like, I got to get him something real.
Dude, thank you so much.
Yes, of course.
You're going to look good in those shoes and the yoga pants.
And the full-ass suit he's got on now.
It looks great.
Do you want me to do a destination wheel for you?
No.
No?
We could.
I mean, of course, yes, but no.
What if it was just all bad destinations
there's no bad destinations it's just bad people that go places
whoa oh shit that was deep ever think about that maybe maybe i could think of a bad destination
maybe the missing piece in that destination yeah could think of a bad destination for you.
Where?
We could do like a 12-hour trip to Oxford.
You have to go to the game.
Beautiful place.
They've got good restaurants.
Good restaurants.
It's only an hour and a half away from us.
No, no, you'd have to stay.
Nice place.
Ajax is a good restaurant.
They've got some good restaurants there.
So wait, what would happen if you went there? Would there be like a crowd of like coming at you or there i'd be a lot of people a lot of people yelling at me and hating
on me and a lot of people like uh but all in good fun or they're they're i think it'd all be a good
i don't think it would be i i don't think it'd be like physical or nothing how many egg bowls have
you been to four or five were they did you go to one in oxford uh yeah no no that's what i meant
four or five in oxford oh yeah shit yeah i've
gotten yelled at barked at but that was before we barked at yeah before anybody like by dogs
or people people not barking after after they beat us and i was barking oh because you guys
are the bulldogs oh that makes sense what's your record on the road i've never won one there wow
have you won one at home?
Yeah, probably five or six at home.
That's fun.
Yeah.
Yep, San Diego.
Where in the developed world would you say is your nightmare destination?
Because I feel like you would be comfortable just about anywhere, Brandon.
I'd be comfortable. I don't know where we could send you.
I'd be comfortable just about anywhere brandon i'd be comfortable i don't know where we could send you i'd be comfortable anywhere outside of obviously i mean middle east type countries over um i do find anywhere i was fine in new york i'm
fine in chicago iowa city i'm fine in rural places iowa city i'd be fine there as long as city's
beautiful as long as there's not like a group of people that are – yeah, I might not do well in Iowa City.
Tropical Island.
Yeah, maybe.
I would do fine.
Bora Bora.
Brandon Walker and Bora Bora.
Isn't that beautiful?
Yeah.
Isn't that the clear water?
Mm-hmm.
Probably just somewhere –
Did you chill out enough?
Somewhere that's hot for no reason.
Yeah, if I sent you to the Sahara.
Yeah, that would be troubling.
And I had to be outside.
Yeah. If I had to be outside on this trip that would suck i sent you to the sahara without a hat if you sent me like on a walking tour of the sahara yeah that would be so bad yeah
or do they offer walking tours of the sahara probably i'm sure yeah i'm sure we could we
could have like ultra marathons there yeah we could get that hooked up. They have, like, ultra marathons there. Yeah, we could get that hooked up.
No problem.
In the desert?
Yeah.
That sounds punishing.
Uh-huh.
Some dude got stranded in there for days.
Had to eat bat blood.
Oh, yeah.
He was, like, pissing.
It's insane.
Yeah.
He was pissing blood, and everyone was like, dude, you should probably get that checked.
He was like, I'm fine.
I know.
He survived, and I think he's doing well.
Oh, look at this.
At what cost?
Oh, my gosh.
$44.
So cheap.
You on a camel would be very funny.
I can see it.
I don't know that I'd do well on a camel.
I don't think you would either.
Camel with one hump or two.
Are there two hump camels?
Yeah.
There are?
There's one hump camels and two hump camels?
Don't you sit in the middle of the humps?
There's definitely one hump camels, too, right?
There's two humps.
Yeah, I think...
All two humps?
No, I rode a one hump camel once.
Oh, they are two...
Oh, so they really are, like, naturally for seats.
They have a saddle.
You can ride camels at the Philly Zoo.
Really?
Yeah, I did it when I was 14.
Damn.
It hurt.
A camel just looks pissed off at all times.
Did Joe Camel have a hump?
He was the best.
He did some humping.
What?
Wasn't he cool as fuck and he always had bitches?
Oh, yeah, he did.
Yeah.
Joe Camel.
Oh, yeah, so Kimo Joe Kimo
All the cigarette guys were cool
It doesn't look like he has a hump though
It's in there somewhere
No I don't think so
That's definitely no hump
Well that's not an anatomically correct camel
It is very funny
That they were like yeah let's make a comic
Cartoon smoker
Cartoon yeah
To get the kids Now they're coming after our zins Very funny that they were like, yeah, let's make a comic. Cartoon smoker. Cartoon, yeah.
To get the kids.
Now they're coming after our Zins.
It's fucking bullshit.
Might make me political.
Yeah, that'll get you into it.
This is a bridge too far, the Zen?
Do you ever have an era where you're like, we're pretty passionate?
No, not really.
Mark?
In politics? Yeah. No, not really. Mark? In politics?
Yeah.
No, no. I was talking on PMT last week about college,
and I had a really good GPA,
and I was saying it was all tricks.
I forgot because I went up to Madison
with some of my buddies for that game last week.
They reminded me that we took a class one year
that was called CFACT, I i think and the only thing we had
to do in the class is just deny that global warming was real and we had to like say that
nuclear energy was the way and that was it like we didn't have to we got like five credits for
just like we had to like watch a couple movies on a monday night and then like had to stand at like
a fair and like pass out pamphlets being, nuclear energy is the way, climate change isn't real.
But this was in the aughts.
Yeah, this was like 2004, 2005.
Early aughts.
Cool back then.
Yeah.
But I was fighting the good fight for nuclear energy.
Can you all explain the Stanley Cup phenomenon to me?
I cannot.
No, I have no idea.
Because there are other cups and things like that.
Right.
But this one is the rage.
Why?
The tumblers have been around for a while.
They've been trendy for a little bit.
I guess this is a...
They're bigger?
It really bothers me that it's the Stanley Cup.
Yeah.
Every time I see it, it bothers me.
Yeah, I saw a graph.
This company's been around for like 80 years.
It's like a hardware company or something?
Yeah, they do tools and shit.
I don't know.
Some hot chick on social media probably had one, and that's all it takes.
When you Google Stanley Cup, it shows up before the hockey.
Oh, my God.
Can you do Stanley Cup revenue or something?
Because it was like they were just like not a mom and pop but
$75 million a year to $750 million.
That's insane.
Crazy range.
They were just kind of chugging along for the last
80 years. Yeah, they are 10x.
Also, Yetis are just better.
What happened though? Was it
like a TikTok? Was it an influencer?
It's like they're big
and they fit in a cup holder
so like girls online
started collecting them or whatever. There's a bunch of colors
and you can accessorize them
and then like there's limited ones
like the Starbucks one. People were lining up
outside Starbucks or at Target for
like six hours to wait
for a release. What was that noise, Mark?
None of these things are unique to the Stanley Cup.
Yeah.
It's kind of like Pokemon.
These are all, everything you just said,
Yeti, Tumblr, name another brand that makes tumblers.
This applies to all of them.
It is the best trophy in sports.
Yeah, but it might be the name.
It really might be the name.
I have a Stanley Cup.
That's all to say.
Yeah.
Take one and you can smash it with the hydraulic press.
I also never hate on people who wait out for that,
because I did wait out for an Xbox 360.
Oh, I've waited for that.
Way long ago, yeah.
I waited for NCAA 05.
Yeah.
There's a line for Xbox 360 camping out.
Isn't the guy that runs TMZ, they had their TV show,
wasn't he drinking out of one of these? That was 20 years ago. Yeah, Harvey Levin. Harvey Levin. He used to always. Isn't the guy that runs TMZ, they had their TV show, wasn't he? Drinking one of these.
That was 20 years ago.
Yeah, Harvey Levin.
Harvey Levin.
He used to always have one of these.
Is that who started it?
That's a really big cop.
There's also the video of a car that was fully engulfed in flames and exploded.
And then they went to the wreckage and there was just a Stanley Cup with liquid still in it.
It's still in the car.
It survived a car exploding.
I feel like that should be a negative, not a positive.
Brandon, I know you're going to disagree.
It's indestructible.
Yeah, but it also...
What's the material that you're drinking your water out of that makes it indestructible?
Why not make the whole car out of the Stanley Cup?
This is indestructible?
It survived a massive car fire and there was still liquid in it.
Could I run over it with a Winnebago?
No.
You'd probably crush.
There's only one way to find out.
Can you see if there's any videos of people trying to run over sailing ships?
Trying to crush them.
Sure.
You look cool.
40 ounces is too much.
You look cool.
40 ounces of a drink in one sip.
Especially for women who, let's be honest,
every woman ever drinks two ounces of their drink in one sitting. Especially for women who, let's be honest, every woman ever drinks like two ounces of their coffee.
Right.
You should only put water in this.
Yeah.
Anything else above 30 ounces is bad.
This is crazy.
This is too big.
What about Mountain Dew?
That's the coal miner.
El Conor Rock.
Baja Blast.
Yeah.
El Conor Rock.
Is a Stanley Cup full of Mountain Dew?
Yeah.
It's a lot of peeing.
By the way, Brandon, I forgot to say, no spoilers,
but congratulations on the perfect game.
First time in Dozen history.
Thank you.
It was the first time.
The only one in Dozen history.
It was the first time in Dozen history.
The only one in Dozen history.
I need you to let me finish my sentence. It was the first time in Dozen history. The only one in Dozen history? I need you to let me finish my sentence.
It was the first time in Dozen history we were the very first.
So how long did your record stand?
Well, that record can't really be broken.
You can only tie that.
What did you say you did?
We were the first team in Dozen history to have a perfect go,
get all of our questions and the bonus round.
It was the first time it ever happened.
Oh, and it's never happened.
So it's the highest scoring game ever? No, it was not and it's never happened. So it's the highest scoring game ever?
No, it was not the highest scoring game.
Oh, who has the highest scoring game ever?
Well, that record was also broken recently.
Oh.
So then your record doesn't really matter.
I never said it did.
You brought it up.
Who got the?
The Frankettes.
What did you guys get?
Wow.
Did all your questions.
Yes, we did.
They ended up with 21, I think.
Say your piece, though.
I don't have a piece.
We got some cupcakes.
I said nothing.
I've said nothing.
It was very apparent when Jeff D'Lo was just tweeting constantly about your record that something was up.
Yeah.
Well, I don't know how Jeff decides these things, but I'm pretty sure they recorded their match two days before we recorded our match.
Oh, so actually you didn't have the first record.
Right.
So he flipped.
I think he –
Oh, so they –
He fucked up.
He set us up to –
Frank technically was the first to have a record.
Right.
He set us up to fuck us.
So you have no record.
Right.
He set us up to fuck us.
Oh, you just beat it?
He let us have the record.
Oh, you just did it too?
Yeah.
Well, you guys did it better.
But I think you guys recorded before us.
So it could have just been you guys, but he let ours go first so he could tweet about it
and then y'all could break it.
Jeff wouldn't do that, would he?
Like, whole string?
I just saw so many tweets about Brandon's.
Dave and Kurt gave him permission to do it.
The expert's having a perfect game, and I was like, something's up.
This feels like a lot of tweets.
And then in the green room last night, Frank was like,
did you see Brandon's perfect game?
And I was like, yep.
And he's like, well, I broke it.
I broke it?
That's what he said?
I broke it?
Yeah, I think he said I.
Oh, that's interesting.
I mean, it is Frank in the Frankette.
It's just interesting that he said I.
I would never say I on the expert. You never would. I say we. You never would. I would never say it's my show. I mean, it is Frank the Frankette. It's just interesting that you said I. I would never say I on The Experts.
You never would.
I say we.
You never would.
I never say it's my show.
I say it's our show.
You never would.
That dozen drama was 24 hours of just dominating the company,
and then it's just over.
And then, yeah, when the dust settled,
I was the only one that really got fucked.
Yeah.
And everybody else got what they wanted.
Which I'm fine with that.
Everybody got what they wanted, and then some. And I was the only one that really got fucked. Yeah. And everybody else got what they wanted. Which I'm fine with that. Everybody got what they wanted and then some, and I was left.
With Mincy.
With Mincy and Kinjack bitching at each other, and I'm stuck in the middle just wondering how I got here.
Triv League would have rocked.
It would have, yeah.
Dave and I were, some of the ideas we had thrown around, we were going to do a tournament on a yacht.
Oh, my God.
Well, y'all could fund that for the dozen i also i also had the idea
um similar to how the nfl plays games in like europe and mexico we just do a week where every
single team has to be has to eat an eighth of mushrooms before they're it's incredible these
are all great yeah and instead substance week yeah just every game is just under a different substance awesome we do the coke one
is like a 20 minute game i played that against ra before yeah that's true yeah a lot of people did
substance week would have rocked that should be a thing is anyone else doing that i don't know
can you do that on youtube you just can? You just can't show You doing the drugs
You can hint at it
You can imply that you did drugs
But you can't physically
Do them on camera
I've had the idea
That I think we're gonna do it
At some point
Where
Hank
PFT and I
Do a scramble
Three man scramble
Against Jake
We eat
An eighth of mushrooms
And Jake is dressed up
Like Toad
I think that would be
Very good That would be very good.
That'd be a great video.
Just playing golf high on shrooms against Toad.
I like that there's no reason for him to be dressed up as Toad.
Well, he's not going to do the drugs, so we have to figure out.
I was going to say we could do like a random person on this show gets dosed,
but we did that once and it ended in disaster.
Wait, when was that? but we did that once and it ended in disaster wait when was that when we did monster rip you you yeah oh that's right yeah yes tj puked you were
out for like a day and a half i was asleep in one of the conference rooms for nine hours before
the brandon walker college football show your face was ghost white yeah i saw i saw demons
i retired from weed because of that you retired from weed yeah. I retired from weed because of that.
You retired from weed?
Yeah, and I retired from milk because of the milk jug challenge.
You retired from milk.
How do you retire from milk? It was one hit of weed?
It was like three-fourths of a bonger.
That was a bong.
I don't know why my weed tolerance is drastically lower than everything else.
Well, you don't smoke.
I used to do like the vape pen at night.
Yeah, that was a fad for a while.
All right, what else we got going on?
I'll text it to you.
What?
He'll text it to you.
Hold on.
On Barstool Radio yesterday, it was funny because I did.
Dave was giving us credit for our shows, and he was like,
they plan everything out, and I had to, like, clear it up.
Like, the Yak is literally never planned.
And John Rich did nail it.
He's like, the Yak is just the show is making plans.
Yeah.
That's true.
A large, every episode. episode healthy plans you just make
plans it's really just a planning meeting yeah every day at noon that's why our female audience
is growing so much probably they're addicted to us yeah you're in plans the responsible guys that
plan speaking of which the the royal rumble case race yes is this actually happening do we think
now we've had a few days to like yes 100 on it it's gonna be so hard to pull it off
i think people won't want to hear this because um i know that they want the grandiose one but
i really do think we should try to do it with our people first,
and then it will build off that.
You got to show, you got to proof of concept,
and then other people will be like, that would look like so much fun.
And when I say our people, it could still be like Mangold,
like could be Shane, could be the Bustin' Boys,
but like to get a ton of extra outside people,
we have to like show how much fun it is.
It gets a lot of views.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So we will do it, though.
I was thinking that.
I was going through my Rolodex of the numerous celebrities that I know,
and I was like, how do you even explain what this would be to them?
Right, but if you can show them, be like, look,
we dress up as wrestlers, got like 500,000 views.
It was awesome.
Yep.
So I think that will be the plan.
So Jane Lynch will not be in the first one.
Yeah, right.
I'm going to level this up.
Jane Lynch.
Jane Lynch.
Oh.
She's not coming.
I mean, we have proof of concept.
We'll try to get her.
Give it to her people and see what happens.
The second one or third one, maybe.
That would be funny if you just used your Rol if you just use your rolodex and got like only big j journalists oh or just only lesbians it's like that's what john
rostein's music oh my god is that nicole arback here she comes stew mandel oh just get blackmail on all of them
yeah we should do it wait tj you texted me something
oh oh wasn't even in the group It was just solo huh Yeah Oh shit
I think we can show that
Yeah show it
Someone made a yak beer
Wow
A brewery in Illinois
Made a wheel is just
Brew
That's fucking sick
What does it taste like
I think it taste like?
I think it's like a mixture of a number of other like hop variations or something that they do.
So it's kind of like spinning a wheel.
Shout out to them.
White Oak Brewing.
That's sick.
I reached out.
They want to give us some.
Yeah.
The White Oak.
Where are they out of?
Somewhere in Illinois.
Followed by Nick.
Did Nick brew this beer?
On the Untapped, which is like a beer social media,
read the description.
The wheel is just...
Features Solero, Nelson, Southern, Eldorado hops.
When decisions of great importance must be made,
you have to trust the wheel.
Weekdays at noon central on YouTube.
TJ, your dad is a loser.
Okay, yeah, yeah.
All right.
He's the IPA guy.
Yeah, I know.
This beer was made for him.
I like that every day.
I like that.
That's a great job.
Great job by them.
Shout out White Oak.
TJ, your dad is a loser.
By the way, next week we're going to have the end of January.
Morrow's coming back on Wednesday.
Very excited.
He's got something up his sleeve, too.
You think so?
I guarantee it.
Gotta like him.
Gotta like him.
What are you in your – I'm reading the prep sheet right now.
Steven, are you thinking fitness these days?
Well, yesterday was swingers.
And you shit on that, and that turned into a great conversation topic.
I never shit on it.
I am the one that read it and said it.
Never shit on it.
Does anybody know any swingers, really?
Bang.
White Sox save 15 minutes.
Of course he does.
Right, but that's – I could have have said any word and i would have got 15
minutes out of white socks dave fair but it's a good story i feel like there's a couple that
probably fetishize fetishizes white socks dave like as their third fuck i hope not no i guarantee
it he's got a safe talked about he knows a swinger like a good friend of his he's looking good
so are you getting into shape?
It's pull-ups and planking.
100 pull-ups in five minutes from the whole show?
I do not think we could do that.
I don't think we could do it either.
Well, I can't give you one.
You could give us one.
No.
You could do one pull-up.
Kyle, how many pull-ups?
40 or 50?
Yeah, it's just can Kyle do 100 pull-ups in five minutes?
50 maybe.
You can do a couple, no? I can do five. I could do a couple, but when we can Kyle do 100 pull-ups in five minutes? 50 maybe. You can do a couple, no?
I can do five.
I could do a couple, but when we're getting to 100, what's that?
I mean, me, Nick, and Mook ain't giving you no pull-ups.
Yeah.
I could give you 10.
I think we could, actually.
I think the strategy is Kyle goes, and then when Kyle needs a break,
one of us does two.
It's like you and me.
I'll jump back in, yeah.
Like, that's not like. Yeah, I could. Just call Kyle. Kyle's going to do 90. I, one of us does two. I'll jump back in. That's not like...
Yeah, I could...
Just call Kyle.
Kyle's going to do nine.
I could do five sets of two.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Maybe we could.
Steven, have you said anything about the fact that you've lost people so much money this year?
He keeps losing.
I don't know if you guys...
The data's still not come around?
He keeps losing.
Double loser last night.
Double loser last night.
How many units are you down since January 1st?
Between 17 and 18.
Whoa.
It's just January 24th.
In NBA.
What were your losers last night?
Drew Holiday over 10.5 combined rebounds and assists.
He finished with 10.
And Bam Adebayo over 35.5 combined points, rebounds, and assists.
And he was tweeting at the NBA account trying to get stats.
You love when I do that.
That's my favorite thing.
It's good when you win.
And it works sometimes.
But when you lose, it looks pathetic.
Yeah.
Whatever.
The one I tweeted last, they were incorrect on that.
I stand by that.
Have you ever talked?
Can we watch that?
Let me see the thing that you tweeted him. The rebound steal I tweeted by that. Have you ever talked – can we watch that? What do you – let me see the thing that you tweeted him.
The rebound steal I tweeted?
Yeah.
I think we can play that, right?
What – do you ever talk to this guy?
Who?
The NBA stats guy?
No, but I messaged with someone that used to work there.
All right, so this is Aliu, which wasn't converted by Kristaps,
was ruled as a steal for Bam.
Porzingis makes a follow-through motion and taps
to the rim. That's a steal. I think
that's a steal, Steven. How is that
a steal? Because he stole the pass.
Yeah, he stole it. That wasn't a
shot. It was a steal.
Porzingis deflects it. It goes off the rim.
No, but Bam deflects it. That's the steal.
Watch Porzingis' wrist. Bam.
Follow-through motion. That's him trying to catch it. It's not him trying to shoot. That's the steal. Watch Porzingis' wrist. Bam. Follow through motion. That's him trying to catch it.
It's not him trying to shoot.
That's a steal.
As soon as you've got to start
a textbook steal.
Porzingis' wrist,
it's a wrap.
I'm glad they stuck
to their guns on that one.
Whatever.
This one wasn't close,
but it was early,
so I mean,
it could have mattered.
Midway through the first quarter.
If you bet with me,
I fight for you.
You fight for you.
I thought you were a sharp.
No. It's taking a horrible tumble
just a magnetic zero no he is
Steven is not a sharp
every month I've been between 55 and 65%
since I've been doing this and this month has been
what is this month horrific
I don't know off the top of my head has it been horrible
I mean it was 6 and 17 at one point.
Maybe like 8 and 20, roughly.
Yeah, terrible.
Is it affecting your day-to-day mental health?
Definitely a lot sadder.
Oh, yes.
No, you're just a lot sadder. Oh, yes. No, no, you're just a lot sadder.
I just realized what that means.
I don't know how to define mental health.
I have this pit in my stomach all the time.
I don't want to get out of bed in the morning.
Cry a lot.
Yeah, if that's mental health.
I'm a lot sadder sad but that's the thing it's like i i get down and then it's like all right work yourself out of it
just yeah get into get into the next day's line it triggers your fight go to bed and i feel i put
out a pick last night at like 1 30 in the morning i feel good about it oh you're chasing you always
do props right i do props yeah have you thought about strain from that and just doing like celtics money line uh it's to get back i've done that
like once or twice then it just kind of but you're in a slump right now you are you got to see the
ball go through the basket you know like get an easy one get to the free throw line hit a couple
what you don't understand mark is he would then have to root for uh like a team versus team in a
team sport and one team to win.
Oh, you can't do that.
It's so anti what sports are about.
I like my line. I went to I took Stephen, Nick and Jenks to a Knicks playoff game last year.
Oh, yeah.
And Stephen's a big Knicks fan.
And he was locked in on who was it?
Donovan Mitchell and getting his rebounds or something
i was just like what is going on right now but that was that was an instance where i tweeted
that at nba stats we got the video it got reversed and we won by one but your team was in the playoffs
i mean we won by like 20 points i know but it was like my fourth quarter was rude it's the most pure
thing of like watching your team in the play i saw i was watching the uh heat celtics last night and jaylen brown had a steal and an uncontested dunk and he's
like doing a chin up and they're doing the slow-mo replay and behind the backboard is this 12 year
old kid wearing a heat jersey that's jumping up as he's dunking it yeah and uh i was like that's
that's fucked up that this kid is cheering for a celt dunk. And then I thought he might have Jalen Brown over 28 points or something.
Yeah.
He's probably 12.
He's Keyshawn Boutte.
Oh, my God.
That was funny as hell.
3,900 plays.
And he was a good gambler.
No, no, no.
89, right?
Or 8,900 plays.
Yeah.
He won 500 grand, but then lost it all.
But he only lost like 50.
That's considered a good gamble?
Oh, yeah.
He lost $50,000.
Yeah.
He had over 8,900 plays?
Yeah, 8,900 plays.
He had 17 plays on college football.
So he was betting on himself to hit over and losing. Betting on everything.
But if you told me I could do 8,900 plays and I would only lose 50 grand, I'd be like, that's
the greatest run of my life. That is your life.
That's the greatest run of my gambling life.
8,900 plays.
How many picks did you have this year in Pickham?
And you were like, right there. That's 20.
I had like 450 plays in Pickham.
So he lost. Did he bet on his
own games? He bet on his over.
He bet on himself to score a touchdown. He bet on himself to... He didn't hit it. his over. He bet on himself to score a touchdown.
He bet on himself to go over his receptions, and he didn't either.
Wait, did he get arrested?
Yes.
Holy shit.
What's going to happen to him?
You can't bet on your own games.
Betting on yourself to score a touchdown.
I think that was the other one.
If you bet on yourself in a positive way, that's a lot different than betting on yourself to score a touchdown. He was underage. I think that was the other – Yeah, that should be – If you bet on yourself in a positive way,
that's a lot different than betting on yourself in a negative way.
That's what Pete Rose did, though.
That's the Pete Rose thing,
but then you've got to think about, like, the butterfly effect.
Yeah.
Like, if he bets on himself one day,
and then he, like, burns his whole bullpen.
Right.
Because he's like, we've got to win this game.
Right.
And then the next game they suck.
But that's that's
a coach that's not an individual player yeah i think to score a touchdown no because it's still
it's still muddy because he has access to the game plan so if he's in the red zone package he could
just be like i need the ball down here and he's gonna say that anyway yeah that's true he will
want the ball anyway right like he's gonna always want to score a touchdown it's like it'd be like
saying like chris j Jones gets a million dollars
if the Chiefs win on Sunday.
But no, no, no, because the butterfly effect is it's first and goal from the 12,
and the play's not going to him.
Does he block his heart on that play?
No.
He thinks if we can get it down to the three-yard line,
then maybe I'll get the ball the next play.
Chris Jones gets a million bucks if he wins on Sunday,
so I think he's going to be motivated to win.
I think he's going to want to try to go to the Super Bowl.
That's going to change his approach.
Yeah, yeah.
It feels like he's going to try really hard in this game.
Who's Chris Jones' agent?
Because it feels like he's got a different million-dollar bonus
to hit every single time he plays.
He's got those – I think they're the Katz brothers.
Oh, I don't really mean who's his agent.
It does seem like he's playing for a million dollars every single week.
Yeah, he's got a very incentivized deal.
Shout out Houston, Mississippi.
That's where he's from?
Yeah, Kyle knew that.
Where did he play college ball, Ole Miss?
Mississippi State.
Oh, I remember he was an Ole Miss guy.
Well, he wasn't. Was he really good in college?? Ole Miss? Mississippi State. Oh, I remember it was an Ole Miss guy. Well, he wasn't.
Was he really good in college?
Yeah, he was very good.
He was on the team that went to number one.
Oh, yeah.
He was our best defensive player.
I've watched every college football playoff game.
I do not remember that team.
Okay, well, I didn't say they made the college football playoff.
Oh.
That was a misconception there.
I said they went to number one.
Oh.
It is a very funny thing that Brandon has to hold on to
that the first ever college football playoff poll,
Mississippi State was number one.
And I will hold on to that motherfucker until the day I die.
Literally all downhill from there.
Oh, y'all don't know how good that season was, though.
Fuck, that was awesome.
I do.
Yeah, but y'all didn't get good until late.
I would argue that
i would argue that being good and being number one in october was better than being number one
after the national championship i would love to hear you argue that go um i liked it more
but your buckeyes won well i wasn't a buckeye yet i didn't become a buckeye till later
you didn't matriculate until later. No, much later.
Buckeye Brad is my favorite nickname.
Has Dave
still texted you Michigan every day? Every day?
Every single day.
It was weird because it was late
yesterday. It was like 9 o'clock, but it was
very early this morning.
He's still doing it after Harbaugh left?
Yeah, I texted him about Harbaugh leaving the other day,
and he just replied Michigan.
Yeah, this morning it was 8.24 a.m.
Michigan.
Michigan.
You know that this is setting up for you to just troll him back
when Michigan loses.
Oh, I know.
You can just tweet Michigan back at him.
It's a long play.
Okay, all right. It's a long play. All right.
It's a long play.
Just making sure you see that.
Yeah.
Okay.
You got this.
I'm fine.
It's just me against Dave.
Can't win again, can they?
Obviously, no.
They're going to be, no.
The Celtics are winning the championship, though,
so be prepared for that.
Is that true?
Yeah, they're going to win the NBA.
It does look like it.
Yeah.
They're pretty good, but they're not slam dunk over everybody else.
I mean, they've been the best team in basketball in the regular season.
It feels like five years now.
This team does feel dip, but Porzingis will get hurt.
Porzingis got hurt last night.
Yeah, he rolled his ankle last night.
Was it on that play?
It was not.
He was on fire, though.
I think he had like 16 points the first quarter. Oh, and they let that play? It was not. He was on fire, though. I think he had like 16 points the first quarter.
Oh, and the kid let him play?
You want to do the high noon ad read?
Someone?
I'll do it.
Sip on summer.
Oh, you can't go anywhere.
On Kyle's birthday?
You made a deal.
You made a deal with Kyle on his birthday?
You made a deal with Kyle. his birthday? You made a deal with Kyle.
It's going to be tough.
I eat right before the yak, and then I turn certain foods to pee.
Classic.
It's a classic problem when those foods turn to pee.
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Did you guys see this parking spot outside?
Yeah.
Who is it?
Oh, you don't know who it is?
I'm not going to reveal the name.
Let me see the parking spot and I'll guess.
It's.
Oh, my God.
You know who that is, don't you?
I don't have a problem with it.
It's also the last parking spot.
Yeah, it's the last parking spot.
I don't have a problem with it.
It is the last parking spot.
But that's a sidewalk.
Yeah, but they're not on the sidewalk.
Oh, is that Jack McCarthy's car?
That's Jack McCarthy, yeah.
What a douche.
Also, real quick, he told me, Jack said he parked that far away
because Steven was still in his car and he wanted to leave him room to get out.
So he was trying to help you, Steven, is what he, is his story.
It is true that I was in my car on the phone at the time
of his parking. So he was doing you a
favor and then you shit on him?
I asked him. First off,
is it okay if I tweet it out? I blurted
all the stuff. It's hilarious.
It's so far. He did that for
you. He did that for you a favor.
That's what he's saying.
He left me eight feet
to open my door.
He did it for you.
He was super courteous.
But even if he went too far, he did it for you.
I don't believe it.
I'm not positive he saw me.
He parked so fast and kind of ran in.
I just think it's funny.
He did it for you.
Just imagine if somebody gave you a kidney or something
and you made fun of the kidney afterwards.
Look at this dumb bitch with one kidney.
They put this kidney in my body backwards.
Look at this gross-ass scar this guy has.
Did you guys ever donate a kidney?
Did we?
Would you?
Oh.
I guess to save family members?
Yeah, who's it for is my question.
Is it for Hitler? My mom donated a kidney to one of save family members? Yeah, who's it for is my question. Is it for Hitler?
My mom donated a kidney to one of her family members,
which makes me think I'm going to have to eventually donate a kidney to her.
So I think she started a chain reaction that I'll be an asshole if I don't continue.
Frankly, kind of a selfish move on her part.
I'd like to call dibs on Tommy's kidney.
You want Tommy's kidney?
Yeah.
You think you're going to stand in the way of the
walker train of kidneys yeah i'd like to do the family's passing kidneys down correct and you're
just gonna grab one i'd actually like the walkers to just be the the kidney farm for my family okay
all right that's fine send us to san diego i'll tell you what if i donated a kidney i would never
stop talking about it yeah i'd just be bringing up in every conversation because like you can't that's
not like uh giving like to charity that's giving a piece of your body yeah a pretty vital piece
i know you but not it can't be that i know you have to i know you have to but a lot of people
need kidney transplant so obviously what if you only got one should Should we tear organs? Yeah, what other organs can you donate
without having a serious problem?
Can you do liver?
I think you need your liver.
No, no, I think you can...
Isn't there some sort of thing you can do something
with your liver to make...
Obviously you can't live without a liver.
It's right there in the name.
Yeah, true.
I didn't even think about that.
Get rid of your liver
you're not a liver dude who wouldn't want a piece oh no that's i don't okay that's
imagine you donate a kidney someone gives you a screen printed shirt
i was really selfless of you i thought we would commemorate it by
oh contains recycled parts.
That's kind of cool.
Is that what kidneys are?
You have two kidneys, right?
Oh, that's not what kidneys look like, is it?
Those look like lungs.
Kidney beans.
Those look like AirPods.
They look like beans.
Like kidney beans.
Yeah.
What are the other things you can donate?
Who just threw that ball?
What do people donate?
People like turn skin into shit.
Yeah.
You do look cool, Kyle.
You look so cool.
Yeah, I want to get like, whenever I'm wearing something like this, I want to get head.
Cool head.
Adulterous head.
Yeah, I could see that I could see you getting head in this for sure
you know what I mean
this is a head outfit
this is like smoke a blunt and get some head
we may have talked about this
I'm speaking my truth
get some cool ass head
what organs can you donate a kidney a lobe
a lobe of your liver?
Well, there you go.
Yeah, a part of your liver.
A part of your liver, yeah.
It's actually your intestine, a part of your pancreas.
Bone marrow is one, I guess.
Imagine actually somebody's intestine.
The cord blood shit is wild.
Like, you save it?
Mm-hmm.
Like, when you have a baby, you save some of their cord blood and then that could
like save their life at some point is that how it works i don't know i've never heard of the
umbilical cord is like uh part of it shrivels up uh once the liquid's like removed from it and like
you can technically eat it and that's like good nutrients but that's not what i'm talking about
that's a different thing entirely i'm talking about when you you have a baby, they save something that could save the baby's life in the future.
That I didn't know.
I've never heard of that.
This might be made up.
Stephanie sounded like she was saying something smart there.
It did.
And we cut her off.
Let's cut her off.
The woman was saying something smart.
We're like, no.
We're going to figure this out ourselves.
What she's doing.
We're going to say some fucking wild shit that we don't have any idea about.
Something about stem cells.
Oh, that's what it is.
They always be talking about stem cells.
Yeah.
Just like regrow a whole baby
from the stem cells.
I think that's what they do.
Are you guys hooping today?
I can't. I got a friend in town
that I got to
go meet up with. What time? I can't. I got a friend in town that I gotta go meet up with.
What time?
I would love to. We do it right after the act.
I can't. Thanks for asking, though.
Will you ever?
I gotta get in shape.
Will y'all make me get in shape?
Look how short this court is.
I can't run multiple times up and down this court without
really having a problem.
You don't have to be in shape. You don't have to be in shape.
You don't have to be in shape, dude. It's five on five.
You're in better shape than I am. Maybe.
That will get you in better shape.
Play one game.
I have basset hounds on my sock.
What?
I have basset hounds on my socks.
My kids bought me socks for Christmas
and I broke them out today and there's basset hounds and hot air balloons on my socks. My kids bought me socks for Christmas, and I broke them out today,
and there's basset hounds and hot air balloons on my socks.
So suck on that.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
What's with this bobcat?
It's behind my house.
Without anybody living in my house right now, it's on 200 acres of land.
Without anybody living there and without human activity,
the animals have crept up towards
the house a lot more and they're using the yard as uh kind of feeding areas at night and um so i
have hogs i have deer and i have a bobcat apparently who wins that fight the bobcat
the bobcat eats the hogs and the hogs are probably good for the deer because the bobcat's going to
eat the hogs before it's going to eat the deer. But the bobcat will eat both of them.
Damn.
Yeah.
That is a big ass.
It's a big boy.
It's a big boy.
It's about 30 yards south of my house.
Fuck.
That's the first one we've ever.
We got gators now, too.
What?
Gators.
You got Jumanji in your backyard?
Oh, those are the pigs?
Those are the hogs.
Yeah.
These are your pigs?
These are from my game camera that's behind my house.
Oh, I didn't know.
Cool.
So it's a camera that if you put it there and something walks by it, it takes a picture of them or a video.
I want to see the bobcat eat something on the camera.
I don't know if he'll do it right out there in front.
That's a big old boy right there.
But that's pointing actually towards my house.
It spins sometimes.
Got it. That's pretty cool yeah you just watch it at night no it sends when when it when it takes a picture
it sends it to your phone oh so it lets you know you have something i already gave brandon a heads
up i'm gonna do a bigfoot thing on his property i'm not gonna know when but just yeah could be
in a month could be in like eight months. Who knows?
I'm in.
But if you already told me, then whenever it happens, I'll know it was you.
No, you'll forget.
You forget.
You have a bad memory.
What was the thing that I had to do?
Oh, I got to make you eat a razor blade.
What?
Yeah, that's right.
That's going to suck for you.
I know.
I completely forgot about that, but that will happen.
That was on me, yeah.
Yeah.
You're going to have a razor blade in your food at some point.
I think the right swallow and chew procedure would leave me harmless.
That could be pretty scary if you bite.
Really tough to pull that off, though.
The swallow and the chew.
Small enough razor.
It was too small, though.
If you swallow a small razor hole i think then it does damage
once it gets down yeah i wouldn't do that yeah um we got to do a fellow friday soon too
yeah we really yeah i have a stack of them you do how about one just right now what about next
week before the super bowl right my fellows are like evolving out of fellowhood because i've had
them for too long.
They're growing too much?
We could do next week, although next Friday
a very special guest is coming by
the office.
Christopher Berman.
Wow.
Schwamm.
Schwamm is going to come. He wants to come.
It's incredible.
He said he wants to do the podcast, play pebble beach have some lunch got believable gauntlet
oh my god schwamm doing the gauntlet would be all time he wouldn't do it right i think we're
gonna figure out either he's gonna maybe call pickup hoops or should we do a home run derby
back back back yeah you know he said he's down forever. He wants to be here.
That would be funny, but imagine these idiots playing pickup basketball
with Chris Berman calling it.
That would also be funny.
Max taking it to the basket with Chris Berman calling it.
That would be amazing.
That's true.
So, wait, what's the fallout from Nate's radio today?
Is the fight back on, TJ?
It was still going when we started, but I don't know.
I saw Francis put out a statement video.
I haven't watched it yet.
Oh, can we watch it?
Let's watch it.
Caucasian Kanye.
That was so good by Aaron.
Got his dark twisted flow back.
Oh, yeah.
Here we are in the office kitchen area again, and it's Bagel Friday, which is a very risky
day for my coworkers who made New Year's resolutions to lose weight for their weddings this spring or beach season,
which is never as far away as people think it is.
It's very easy to let yourself go in the cold, dark months of winter under blankets and hoodies
and then find yourself facing the garish light of sun and warmth and having to put on a bathing suit before you're ready?
Uh-uh. Don't let it happen.
And I won't.
Which is exactly why, for my
co-worker's sake, I scooped
all the bagels.
That's right.
I turned these 1,200 calorie
hockey pucks of fat
into 400 calorie
treats. Guilt free.
You're welcome, guys.
Just doing my part.
You know.
Somebody had to step up.
I like it.
I love Francis.
That was his response.
What is he responding to?
Was there some bagel slander in the...
No, I think there was something...
Like, they were saying Francis was...
Nate was in everyone's head so much
that Francis went out and bought 100 bagels.
Damn, Clemmer and Nate, where the hell you been?
Yeah, he's been...
Nate does kind of live a little bit rent-free
in people's head right now, in this moment.
Felt... I could feel it in the office.
You ain't got no fucking Nate in your Serato?
Nate was at, we went to a dinner on Wednesday night for Erica.
Nate was there.
Zero Bond.
This is like an exclusive club in New York.
It's called Zero Bond?
Yeah.
Sounds like an ass powder.
A what?
Ass powder?
Yeah
Yeah I guess it does
Like gold bond medicated powder
Zero bond
Yeah there's no calories in it
Yeah
It's a loveless marriage
Zero bonds
Oh yeah
Yeah
That too
It's like the hall of fame
Oh
Good one Brandon
You guys are rolling
Hell yeah Brandon It's like the Hall of Fame. Oh. Good one, Brandon. You guys are rolling. There you go. Hell yeah, Brandon.
It's like if Pierce Brosnan died.
Oh, yeah.
Well, Daniel Craig still alive.
There'd still be a lot of bonds.
Daniel Craig also died.
If Pierce Brosnan.
We still got Sean Connery.
Sean Connery's dead.
Or Roger Moore's.
And Roger.
Definitely.
Moore probably is dead.
Who is the new Bond?
Have they said?
I think Daniel Craig came back, didn't he?
He's back?
Didn't they say it was going to be Idris Elba and then it wasn't?
No, I don't think they ever said.
I think that was like the fan fiction.
I think there is a new one.
People are trying to make Idris Elba because it makes a lot of sense.
Yeah.
He would be an awesome Bond.
Yeah, he would be awesome.
I never watched any of the Bond movies.
I didn't watch any of the old ones.
I have watched the, like, Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace and all those.
Are they good?
They're really good.
Yeah, they're great movies.
They're really fucking good.
Is it the same movie every time, though?
Eh, you kind of know that.
It's like...
Yeah, no, I don't hate on that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, similar, sure.
Yeah.
But still great.
That's why we love them.
It's going to be a hot-ass woman.
It's going to be some chases.
Going to be some bums.
Somebody's going to turn on somebody.
Some sick technology.
Yeah.
Some new cutting-edge thing.
Yeah, some British quips.
I remember the Pierce Brosnan one where he summoned his car on his phone,
which you can actually do now.
Yeah, you can do that.
In the 90s, I was so sick.
Yeah. I got to watch a bond i guess next james bond favorites 2024 here though 13 actors most likely to succeed daniel craig is 007 does he have to be british hmm well yeah right like
actually british i think so are they they all British? Is Roger Moore British?
Aaron Tyler.
Pass.
Don't know him.
That's not a Bond guy.
Maybe.
Yeah, that's a Bond guy.
Too beefy.
Too beefy.
Okay.
He was Superman, too.
He can't be Superman and James Bond.
No.
No.
No.
James Norton, no.
Maybe.
Yeah, he looks pretty cool.
But then I can't really see myself as Bond.
Yeah, representation matters. Yeah. yeah no he'd be pretty good you don't all right who's this rege jean-p yeah i think so we need a five
seven james bond with cauliflower ear no he's not james bond i'd uh he's anything he's anything
he's a villain he's a villain no he's anything he wants to be
who's this oh tom hardy definitely a little bit no he's too thick he might be too thick yes
sope driso
no ginger bond um no maybe i'm daniel craig yeah why not who's that pop papa isito no
no no i kind of like him name's callum callum that's kind of is this a guy that's dating
yeah i think you're right he might be bond tell he might be bond yes that's that's bond resounding that's a bond oh it's like the
richard nixon that's a bond face right there yeah that is a bond dick madden
he's a villain 21st yeah you're right he's a turn though He's a villain. 21st century. Yeah, you're right. What if Bond took a turn, though?
He's a guy who turns on Bond.
They're friends.
They work together.
He's one of the other agents.
He didn't take the training.
He's 008 or something.
He dropped out of the training.
Yeah, and then now Bond has to go kill him because he's got all the secrets to everything.
That's what his role in the movie is.
Let Michael Scott be Bond.
James Bonfire. That would be Bond. James Bonfire.
That would be sick.
I'd just call him Michael Scott
because I oftentimes forget Steve Carell's name.
I want to see Victor Weminyama in a movie
just to see how ridiculous that would look
because actors are notoriously shorter.
Yeah.
Embiid, that clip of Embiid seeing him for the first time up close and being like,
holy fuck, he's tall, was pretty funny.
That was like a slideshow and everything looked, it was, made my jaw drop.
It's crazy to watch an NBA game and guys like Steph Curry are considered small.
Isn't he 6'3"?
6'3", yeah.
Yeah, so if he walked in here, we'd just be like,
oh, he's taller than everyone.
You guys are going to start talking about your height more often.
What do you mean?
Everyone thinks I'm 5'4".
Because you guys are 6'5".
How tall are you, Mark?
I was 6'4".
I probably have shrunk.
Yeah?
Because I've gotten older.
It is the thing I get the most people surprised how big
I am. How tall are you? I'm 6'5".
I'm 6'2.5".
No, you're not. 6'4".
No, I'm 6'2.5".
My dad was 6'3".
I always wanted to get to 6'3". I never got there.
Are you a disappointment because of that?
I think I'm a disappointment
for a lot of other reasons.
Height's probably not one of them.
They should remake Enter the Dragon with Wen Minyama.
Was that the Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Bruce Lee movie?
Oh.
I don't think that was the one.
It might have been.
It might have been.
Who's coming to Royal Rumble tomorrow night?
Just right now, the Mostly Sports guys.
But you're welcome to come if you'd like to come
watch the Rumble. We'll see how I'm feeling. I got
Disney on Ice tomorrow.
Game of Death.
Game of Death.
That's sick.
You could have
saved money, man. You could have just come out to my house
and I could have put on Disney on Ice for you.
I would have loved to see that.
I could have dressed up as Cinderella and Snow White, all those people.
Done a nice show.
Got some lights.
Would be easy.
Yeah, I'm not super pumped for Disney on Ice, but that's, you know.
You just can't be.
I feel bad.
Yeah, you just have to do it.
Just hope the kids enjoy it.
Are we going to lose the ice next week?
We're losing it right now.
Yeah, I mean. I had no snow. It we going to lose the ice next week? We're losing it right now. Yeah.
I mean, like.
I had no snow.
It's going to be 50 next week.
We're getting false hope.
We're going to get one of those. But it's too early for false hope.
True.
We're not falling for it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
False hope has to happen in the first week of March.
March, yeah.
Yeah, so that's the 40s for the next.
Sometimes it's April.
Shit.
That's when the trap happens.
I've been looking for, I've been looking at the weather every day, hoping for sun for... Sometime in April. Shit. That's when the trap happens. I've been looking for...
I've been looking at the weather every day,
hoping for sun for my guy, KB.
Praying on sun.
They dropped it down.
They had it at 51 at one point.
I'm all right.
I've been praying on sun.
Vegas will help, right?
I don't know if sun was the issue.
Oh, it was the weed.
I think it was weed, general grief.
Yeah.
But I've been running
And running is
Probably the best thing
Cause I've been
I was lifting too much
Cause I was afraid
To burn too many calories
Right
A long distance run
Will measure
The best
Clears your mind
Change your mood
I just hate it so much
Every second of it
Do you run Titus?
Yeah oh yeah
On the street?
Yeah only
I can't do treadmills
I only do
Streets I can see you on the street Do you run on the street KB? can't do treadmills i only do i could see you on the street
do you run on the street kb i just do treadmills i'm not good like i don't i run a lot but i don't
i'm not getting bad i don't have any my titties jiggle too much of note it's always a problem
when i run yeah and you can't also as bigger men you can't trust every treadmill do you get
self-conscious about the amount of noise you make
on a treadmill yeah how heavy your steps sound it's too heavy yeah i i just i i feel like i'm
don't you're up in the rest of the gym point of reference do you have on treadmills i've tried
about every six months i'll just go you try regularly yeah but that's why you gotta run on
the street because you're you're vulnerable on the treadmill you're stuck in that spot and everybody
can see you people can walk by and but i joined a gym in in antioch i'm so i have a minute i didn't know you were running though
i'll try just to warm up to to lift my problem with running on the street is that i always get
to like the stoplight and i'm not a run in place guy so everyone's like well this guy
yeah gassed out standing there breathing heavy on the sidewalk. Breathing sweaty as fuck. Yeah. Do you at least walk around with –
No, I just stop.
I'll do a dead stop and be like, hope this lasts a while.
You got to walk around aimlessly like this and look like you –
Just like hopping back and forth.
Even if you're not doing the running in place,
look like you're pissed off about stopping.
I rollerbladed.
I had rollerblades probably about eight years ago,
and I was like, I'm going to start rollerblading.
And I went out once, and a couple stoolies saw me,
and I literally just stopped right there and walked home.
Like, I can't tell.
Yeah, I had shoes on with me because I was like rollerblading.
I was like, I'm going to go somewhere.
And then I was just like, I'm done.
Just can't look cool.
Can't be getting seen.
No.
Would have been, did you just leave the rollerblades right there?
No, I just walked the rollerblades home.
I was like, fuck it.
I'm done.
Never doing this again.
It's just like, it's just you can't look cool rollerblading.
Walking around carrying rollerblades.
Also bad look.
I think you need a hockey stick.
Maybe if I start rollerblading with a hockey stick.
That is true.
If you just have a stick in your hand.
Yeah.
That changes everything.
People are like, oh shit, what is he doing? What is he up to? I have a stick in your hand. Yeah. That changes everything. People are like, oh, shit.
What is he doing?
What is he up to?
I want to play some roller hockey.
We got to get a floor ball in here.
I would love floor hockey on this.
Floor hockey would ruin the floors, but there is, like,
one that's designed for wood floors that we could get.
That would be sick.
Next week we have on Wednesday, I don't even know if I'm allowed to
announce it, but I'm going to.
We have a real handball team coming, so we're going to play some handball.
Oh, let's go.
I've been seeing a lot of their videos lately.
Yeah.
Satisfying.
The good handball.
Yeah.
The Olympic style.
Right.
Not the slap it against the wall handball.
No, with like goal point line and all that.
Yeah.
Because we have a longstanding rivalry with handball because it is the one
Olympic sport where it's like if –
you know, we make the jokes about soccer,
like if our best athletes played soccer.
Like handball, if you just were like Patrick Holmes,
you're playing handball, he would rule.
Yeah, we talked about this.
I said he needs two years.
I don't think so.
You think he could do it in a month.
And they get very upset because they're like, no, it takes a lot of skill.
But, like, you can't tell me if you just had a team like Josh Allen playing handball,
he would not be the best player?
But there's so much experience that he'd have to gain.
I don't think he would.
Josh just runs some people over and throw it in the top left corner.
They put like spin on it.
There's a stick element.
But he throws it so much harder than all these.
But there is a technical aspect.
But they probably have some hard throwers.
I think it would be a month tops.
Yeah.
Like, look at it.
You're telling me Patrick Mahomes wouldn't be a lead at this game?
Well, this isn't the game.
I don't know.
No, that's a penalty shot.
I don't know.
That is true.
That was some.
But nobody's defending that.
This is.
I think that's a penalty shot, Brandon.
Right.
I understand that.
But that's why I said that's not the game.
This is the game.
Yeah.
But tell me Josh Allen wouldn't be the best handball player.
That's crazy.
Patrick Holmes with all his arm angles.
Oh, wow.
How could you say that that wouldn't be?
I didn't.
I didn't.
I'm just.
I'm going to have to stick with my gut.
You think so?
There's like European countries who like that's their national sport.
There's no way.
There has to be a technical element.
Would he snap the ball around the court like this?
Would he learn how to do that?
I think he'd just throw it to whatever spot he wants to throw it to.
He'd have to be able to throw left-handed?
He can?
That goalkeeper wasn't very athletic.
I think the goalie is just guessing.
I don't know how much.
I'm probably wrong. Also, they
put spider tack all over the ball.
So Garrett Cole would be awesome at it?
Yeah.
I think they would listen.
What?
They load up on spider attack, and they put it on their shoes so that they can load up
more during the game action.
Are those not sticky enough?
They look miserable.
Yeah, they all look miserable.
What the hell?
Yeah, they're like, I wish I was playing a real sport.
What's that play for the Chiefs?
Yeah.
Why does it look like nobody wants to play handball?
Who's that?
Never mind.
I'm on your side.
Yeah, I mean, I'm not saying.
I'm not making the argument.
Yeah, I agree.
I think you could, yeah.
I'm not making the argument that we could be the lead in handball.
I'm just saying that our best athletes.
Why sucks Dave with the cannon he has?
That was sick.
Give him a month.
Jay Cutler.
Oh, my goodness.
Now we're talking.
That was sick.
That was awesome.
Because, like, there's a certain.
Oh, my goodness.
I think it comes down to the fact that there's a certain amount of arm torque
everyone can physically have.
And I would assume baseball players, like pitchers, have the greatest arm torque.
I could watch this all day.
It's a nice-sized ball, too.
It's a very throwable ball, if that makes sense.
So Josh Allen can make that
throw for sure. Right. Dresser win.
Yeah, I'm sure there is a technique to it, but most of these
highlights don't really have
Right, like Jacob DeGrom wouldn't be the greatest
ball player. That one is
That's sick. That one's pretty sick.
That refutes my point, but
Oh!
She got smashed.
So what team is coming in?
I don't know.
Just a handball team?
Church League or a pro team?
I think it's a pro team.
Oh!
TJ, remind me.
Maybe next week or the week after
we have to play that game,
the blindfolded
goal game
where you just lay there and you roll it.
Yeah, goal ball.
Oh, yeah. That looked awesome.
Yeah?
Yeah. We showed that on here.
Can we play?
Can we do it real quick right now?
Just real quick? Just one round of it?
What do you need?
Two goals? Yeah, we got the two goals right there.
Let's do it. Get Connor out here.
Set it up.
Show it to us.
Show us the...
I got to find a non-Paralympic clip they'll dox it.
Oh.
Or DMCA's.
Wait, they're what?
DMCA?
They're Olympics.
Olympics doesn't fuck around.
What's cool with that hat, too?
They are motherfuckers.
Oh, yes.
This is like a customized goal.
It's awesome.
The rollers are all blindfolded.
We could just do it.
They're all different.
They're all vision.
Can we just play this real quick?
Don't we have blindfolds? Set up both poles. We could just... Yeah. They're all different. Yeah, they're all vision. Can we just play this real quick? Do we have blindfolds?
Yeah.
Don't we have blindfolds? Set up both poles.
Oh, yeah.
We could play this.
What happened to those Jerry After Dark blindfolds?
Best blindfolds ever.
Those were ones in mostly sports and ones in the room you're in.
I thought we had a bunch of those.
We had three at least.
Oh, we had three.
Let's just play one round of 2v2.
Well, who's going to commentate? We're just going to go out there jay and tj connor ken yeah
so do we have matching goals yeah we do what are we playing to
let's play to 21 let's play to three three feels feels right. Three feels right.
I'll be honest.
I couldn't really see it.
Show it one more time.
Just tell me what happened.
So we have blindfolds on, and you roll the ball.
I like my chair.
Sorry.
Trying to roll it, and then you try to get in front of it by sound?
It's like a kickball.
Yeah.
This game is going to rock.
Are you on your knees, and then you lay down when the ball's coming? I think you can lay down
the whole time if you want. Yeah, but you wouldn't be able to
really move that way. The chat is saying it's a special
ball that has a bell inside of it so that they can hear it.
Oh, no shit. I don't need that.
I don't need that.
If it's rolling, we won't be able to hear it
unless it's bouncing.
I think you have to bounce it a little bit.
I think you have to have a little bounce to it.
Throw it in a rugged way.
Oh, there's the bell. Yeah, yeah, I heard the bell to have a little bounce to it. Throw it in a rugged way. Oh, there's the bell.
Yeah, yeah.
I heard the bell.
All right.
I do believe it.
Can we attach a bell?
Oh, this is going to be fun.
Is this ableist of us?
No.
Okay.
Oh, these are disabled people?
They're vision impaired.
So they're all blindfolded, so they're equally vision impaired.
Right.
So I don't think that as long as we're blindfolded, it's fair, right?
Yeah, you're vision impaired.
Is that too close?
No.
These goals?
That seems close.
I think you got to go one back.
Yeah.
Yeah, go one back.
Go red lines, Connor.
All right, so we need.
Green line to green line.
And we need blindfolds.
2v2.
Game to three?
Sure. This is three? Sure.
This is just a test.
Yeah, see if it works.
We'll scale it up later.
The other thing I'd love to do at some point is get, like,
if there's, like, a Chicago wheelchair basketball team
and have, like, our five in wheelchair versus their five in wheelchairs.
Ooh.
That would be awesome.
I think the, uh, what team is Scotty Barnes on currently?
They just did the Raptors.
The Raptors, yeah.
Okay.
All right, so everyone blindfold.
Connor, you're going to call the game.
Where'd you get blindfolded?
You're going to call the game.
The Dough Fields.
All right, so who's – what are the teams?
Me and Brandon?
Yeah.
Why don't you want to hold out here?
I don't know.
That was stupid, man.
Do we have a kickball?
DJ, Stevie, you got a...
There's a blue kickball out there somewhere.
There's definitely a kickball out there.
You can turn that mic on right there.
Testing, testing.
Here we go.
Oh, wait.
We're looking for blindfolds.
Brandon is getting changed.
Yeah. Brandon is getting changed yeah alright folks
here with TJ and Zaha
in the booth
Big Cat's setting up
love this music
everybody's putting on
their blindfolds right now.
And it looks like we are about to get underway.
What are the teams looking like?
No idea.
It looks like there's some confusion over if they're allowed to be playing right now on the court because
we don't know but we're gonna do it anyway some random people walking onto
the court right now a lot of confusion Okay.
Brandon has secured his blindfold.
So has Big Cat.
If we're being totally honest, I have no idea what this game is.
Goalball.
It's a vision-impaired Paralympic sport.
Thank you, TJ.
God, KB looks so cool. Hello, Jay.
Brandon looks so much less cool than KB does.
That would be great.
I don't think they have any idea
where they are on the court right now.
Big catch is scored.
I don't know if we're playing for real right now, but
he just scored on Brandon. Brandon had no idea
where he was. Chase just asked me, can they hear?
What kind of question is that?
All right, Big Cat down on his knees.
Brandon takes a shot.
Big Cat looking to save it.
No, that's going to go in.
That's a score for Brandon, but I don't know if it counts.
KB can fully see right now.
He does not have the blindfold on, and I don't know exactly what he's doing.
That would be a good strategy if KB just cheated
and took his blindfold off without them knowing.
It's his birthday. He can do what he wants.
All right, now he's putting it on.
So the teams are Brandon and Big Cat.
Okay, here we go.
And versus KB and Titus.
Versus KB and Titus. Okay, gotcha.
All right, folks, we're underway.
Now we are going.
Big Cat rolls this one straight down the court, and that's going to be stopped by KB and Titus. Okay, gotcha. All right, folks, we're underway. Now we are going. Big Cat rolls this one straight down the court,
and that's going to be stopped by KB.
Blindfolded.
KB makes the save.
Nobody knows where the ball is.
Spider's going to have to go and retrieve it.
And now Spider puts the ball back in play,
hands it off to KB.
Right in goal.
Really don't know what the strategy here is aside from just rolling it as fast as you can down the court.
So they would stand up and do like a spin throw, so that must be meta.
Brandon and Big Cat are going with a defensive strategy here.
They're laid out across the goal.
Brandon's foot is about three feet short of the right
post, though.
KB's looking for a reference point to figure
out where his back is facing.
Titus is doing
downward dog, not really helping.
Titus also looks very
confused. His mouth is
wide open, like, what the hell is going on?
Titus almost looks like he's in some sort of hostage situation.
KB is angled very much to the left. If rolls this straight this is going all the way into the kitchen yep it does roll truly into the kitchen not close to anything Should we move the goals closer? Right into a shoot over there.
But Spider-Retriever.
I did put it at the free throw lines, and they said, no, move them back, move them back.
We want to go further.
So this could be ugly.
Surprisingly, this sport that is played in the Paralympics, not so easy.
Oh, Titus with the save.
Or maybe I'm wrong.
Acrobatic with his left leg.
Because that one was bouncing a little bit,
and he was able to deflect it in the air.
So now he gets the rebound.
He's trying to figure out where he is.
Yep, he is right in front of his own net.
Somebody needs to start, like, walking up the floor here.
Yeah, you could just walk all the way across the floor
and place the ball on the goal, and they wouldn't know.
Here comes Titus.
Strong roll, and that's going to be easily blocked by Brandon.
I mean, they're just laid fully out on the floor.
It might be beneficial to find big-body blinds,
triple Bs for this sort of game.
Big body.
If you find the biggest body blinds, triple Bs for this sort of game. Big body.
If you find like the biggest body blind you can find,
like a sumo wrestler with a blindfold on.
The same concept if there was like blindfolded hockey, I guess.
I feel like this one's going to be good from Big Cat.
Nope, that is going to be far right.
Wide right.
Shout out, Buffalo.
Oh, I got an idea.
What?
Do we have mousetraps, though?
Oh, we do.
Stand by.
Yeah, does anybody know how to set them?
TJ is looking for a mousetrap, folks.
You're fine, you're fine, you're fine. It's over there.
It's over there.
Stephanie has taken over the camera.
Here comes KB.
I think you shouldn't tell us what you're going to throw.
It's harder that way and that's better.
KB processing here.
Fakes it.
Fakes it again as if anybody is biting on this fake.
And he goes wide left again.
Into the kitchen again.
What's the score? I lost Cal. Wait, I got it. And he goes wide left again. Into the kitchen again. TJ was just on the approach.
Yeah, Big Cat took off his blindfold right as TJ was on the approach. You gotta move these closer. We're good, we're good. Ball. Okay, ball, ball.
Yeah, Big Cat took off his blindfold right as TJ was on the approach.
So TJ's gonna have to now go back out.
He's maneuvering around with a mousetrap.
Brandon with a strike.
And that's saved at the last second by KB.
KB knocks it away.
That's gonna go out of play.
No idea where TJ is, but he does have a mousetrap in hand.
And this could get interesting.
Oh, there he is.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, Brandon sensed it.
Brandon sensed it.
Goal.
Goal.
What?
Just why? Oh, he's feeling around.
Brandon's feeling around.
He knows it's there.
Oh Spider, you should have left it in the head!
What is Spider doing?
You should have left it! doing? KB's on his head! KB's on his head! KB was doing a head handstand and he deflected What the hell is going on?
The past minute.
And Brandon, yeah, Brandon's not putting his hands on the floor.
Brandon has his arms fully crossed.
Wait, did he throw it?
Did he throw it?
I don't know.
I just threw it.
For the podcast listeners, Che is standing right in front of the main camera.
Brandon rolls that one down.
And Titus comes away with a block.
Che, I thought, was going to just snatch that himself,
even though Che does not have a blindfold on and is just roaming around willy-nilly.
Here comes Titus.
Did he get an extra throw?
No.
Oh!
That was a fast pitch, but that's going to go wide right.
TJ still maneuvering around with a mousetrap,
trying to find the right moment to strike.
He's behind the body armor.
Yeah, now he's coming in.
Mid-court.
Connor and Stephanie in the booth Zah to our right
Brandon really has the
technique down of
rolling along the
That's a soft one
and Brandon celebrating even though it's nowhere near the net
Yep
Nope and Brandon celebrating even though it's nowhere near the net. Yep.
TJ with another mouse grab.
Nope.
Oh he does, he does, he does.
No, but he's not. Oh he does have it.
He did put it down.
Oh no!
No!
It's a veteran move by TJ but it didn't work out.
It's still in play.
Oh! Come on still in play. No, no, no, no.
Come on, come on, Mark.
No, they're staying away from it.
No, no, no, he's gonna put his hand down.
Did they draw?
Oh my god.
It'll come back.
He's putting out more. it'll come back TJ has grabbed another mousetrap a second mousetrap is in play
also KB
keeps pump faking
as if he's going to fake anybody out
nobody knows
that he even has the ball
oh big cat taking defense on mous Nobody knows that he even has the ball.
Oh, Big Cat taking defense on mousetraps just by bouncing the ball and trying to set them all off.
Yep, see?
There he goes.
This is...
I think he's still missing.
I think it's still outside his left leg.
This look from Brandon is interesting.
Oh, my God.
Mark.
Mark's about to hit it.
Mark is dangerously close to a mousetrap.
Now he's not, he just got out of the way.
No hesitation for Mark, rolls that straight down,
but again wide right.
Oh!
How is everybody alive?
How is nobody putting it on the ground?
Should we move closer?
All right, let's go.
All right.
Oh, they're taking the blindfold off.
Oh, my.
Grab a cheat.
Cheat, cheat, cheat, cheat, cheat, cheat.
Grab a cheat.
Grab a cheat.
Smart, smart. Yeah, all right.
Nice.
All right.
No, no, they're going to go on there right here.
Pre-show.
Smart play by Che.
Saves the mousetrap before anybody sees it.
TJ is spiraling right now.
All right, don't let us pass the reds.
Don't let us pass the reds.
TJ's just trying to stay out of plain sight.
He's also wearing camo today, which is very funny.
He's just trying to stay out of anything.
But now blindfolds are back on, except for KB.
But it looks like we're about to get back on our way here.
The nets have been brought closer together.
Hold on, we're playing a three still.
Because you guys are about to score on this one.
Well you don't know that.
Yeah I do.
Alright, you ready?
Hold on, hold on.
Okay, ball in.
Oh, look at that. That is playing in. Oh, Titus. Titus playing key.
Oh.
What a save.
Saved by Titus.
Oh, what a save.
Almost slipped through on the rebound, but Titus saves it.
And now Titus retains possession.
Looks like he's going to give it off to KB.
KB, can he score?
The game winner right here on his birthday.
We're stopping this game after one.
Brandon.
Is this the hardest game
you've had to call? Yeah, by a mile.
I have no idea what's happening.
Baseball, basketball, football,
I've done it. This, I have no idea.
Oh, oh, oh, oh!
Can he stop the redirect? He does.
Should we do no-line now?
It's probably too easy.
Oh, my God.
A mousetrap is right in front of his nose.
Oh, my God.
Spider, get the fucking mousetrap because he's going to open his eyes.
That would have been...
This entire company would have been bad.
Everything would have fallen to pieces.
So rules are no lying down now.
Are the mousetraps still in play?
Are they going to put their hands on the floor?
Oh, that could slip right through the middle.
No.
Last second saved by KB.
Let's go, Kyle.
All right, we're standing now, Brandon.
Big Cat's taking a goal line stance.
TJ's gone rogue.
Nobody knows where he is.
Salad him, Titus.
Through his legs.
Give him a salad.
That's what we call, in your kind of English, it's called the nutmeg.
In my kind of English, we call it the salad.
All right, here comes Titus.
This one has potential.
I don't know if Big Cat knows it's coming
That was the spot
That was good
Good goaltending
Oh he knew there was a mouse trap
He kicked it
God damn it
Poor Brandon
I kind of feel sorry for Brandon
with the mousetraps. I know I'm not allowed
to say that. No, no, no. That's fine.
You don't have to admit it if he comes back
and asks about it.
Oh!
He hit it!
The first person
to go over him with the throw.
And he sinks it.
That was incredible.
Now my only question is
is that a legal move?
I think it is. Are we going up to the booth
for some VAR action?
I don't even
think that Titus and KB knew that he
threw it.
Oh, now they know.
Now it becomes a whole lot harder
to defend now, which is
good.
Alright. KB once again Now it becomes a whole lot harder to defend now, which is good. All right.
KB once again milking every single second of this.
He's facing the exact wrong direction.
Okay, now he's lining up properly.
TJ's right outside of Brandon, by the way.
Yep, he's up to something where he's standing.
Oh. Oh!
Oh! Off the post!
Off the post!
Big Cat heard that
mousetrap land, by the way.
Yeah.
That was a very
athletic play from Big Cat to keep that from going in.
I'm so locked in on the mousetrap
situation. Yeah.
Can't watch anything else.
TJ, TJ's eyes up top.
See, now Big Cat's actually moving a little bit.
I thought he was going to go closer to the net.
No, that one goes wide left.
KB has his angles down.
Oh, you're already throwing.
Yeah, I went stick and tag.
Stick and chain. Rogue. Rogue mouse trap. Oh, I can't get down. TJ has come back into the booth.
Are there any mousetraps at play, TJ?
There's one in front of Titus. Okay, cool.
Titus getting down in a crouch.
It's so funny watching people blindfolded.
There is every single person who's at the office right now is watching, by the way.
There's a crowd of people on the balcony.
Brandon scores again.
That's two for Brandon.
He's going for a hat trick next, folks.
Oh, yeah.
We got some people locked in.
I thought we were stopping after one.
Two nothing right now. Okay. 2-0 right now.
Okay.
Big Cat and Brandon lead.
Titus and KB still trying to get on the board.
KB sizing up his shot.
He's trying to put some spin on it.
That one goes right towards Brandon.
And it saved off his shin.
He thought it was a mousetrap.. He thought it was a mousetrap.
He thought that ball was a mousetrap.
TJ, what you done to him?
He's so skittish.
I think he can, like, feel me around.
He's, like, swiping on me.
He noticed you the very first time you went over there.
Oh, overhead throw.
I like the bounces.
Yeah, you're not going to get it by rolling.
The KB save is one of the greater athletic things I've ever accomplished by this company.
Agreed.
That was unbelievable.
Titus with some physics.
Roll wide again.
I think I covered it.
That's going to be the most aggravating game.
Cause you don't know how you're failing.
Look at Huck.
Brandon, very, very close to a hat trick,
but that's gonna go wide again.
Still two-0.
Is Jay wearing a Spider 2 white banana shirt?
Yeah. Shout out John Gruden.
Are we shouting out John Gruden?
I thought that was his play, my bad.
No, no, no.
Oh shit, yeah, you're right.
You are right on that one.
And there's a deep drive to left field.
That's got to be white.
That's white.
White right?
Well, it's their right, it's our left.
Yeah, their left.
Or their right.
I'm getting my lefts and rights confused, too.
That's okay.
Now here comes Titus on the approach.
Still staying glued to that goal post.
Not moving an inch forward.
But this is a good roll.
And he's got it.
Bottom right.
Bottom right corner.
He's able to sink it.
2-1.
Titus and KB get on the board.
They call that bottom 92...
What is that, Saw?
Bottom corner.
Bottom corner.
Nothing real special.
I don't know soccer.
Top is top bins.
I'm going to say that next time.
Top bins, there we go.
If the ball leaves the ground, top bins and hit it.
Good save by Titus. Clean save by Titus.
Now he's directing KB towards the center of the floor.
And KB just goes directly right back to the goalpost.
Chat's saying 1-1.
What? Chat's saying it's 1-1.
No it's not.
I don't think they're counting the one that Brandon smoked in there.
Oh, they're not counting the one? Yeah, they didn't count it. Alright, apologies's 1-1. No it's not. I don't think they're counting the one that Brandon smoked in there.
Oh, they're not counting the one?
Yeah, they didn't count it.
Alright, apologies.
1-1.
We can't fully hear everything that's going on out there.
Ooh.
So 1-1.
That was an illegal throw by Brandon.
Again, I'll apologize for that one.
No golf.
Deep drive to left field.
Uh...
Oh shit!
Oh shit! Titus just got pegged.
Titus just got pegged by Big Cat.
That should have bounced.
Good save.
Who did it?
Me.
Who was that?
I thought I didn't have my...
I didn't have my distance right.
You might be tough.
All right.
Ooh.
All right, Titus.
Come on.
There is a gap. Dead smack in the center of this goal right now.
And Titus...
Titus is rolling it
maybe one and a half miles an hour.
Yeah, it's gonna go
very far left.
Roll by Brandon, trying to catch him off guard.
There is still, through all of this, a loaded mousetrap
directly in front of where Titus is standing.
Oh, yeah, there is.
Chase cheated.
It's almost impossible that he hasn't triggered it yet.
Yeah, I know.
That's why I told Spider not to say anything.
Is that the one that Shay stepped on
once they took the blindfolds off and everything?
He tried to make sure that they didn't see it.
I don't want to directly break someone's finger by putting it in their hand, but, you know.
Oh, KB.
Dead smack.
No!
I think Big Cat just kicked Brandon in the nuts low here.
Yeah, Big Cat and Brandon collide on the save.
They, like, scissored.
But they did form a wall that was very successful.
That's a lot of men.
Crossbar challenge.
There was a point where Big Cat's nose was directly in front of a mouse.
I know, I know.
Yeah, that's old fuck. Oh shit.
Bro, we...
He would think it's funny, though.
Alright.
I hope so.
Oh ho ho ho.
I don't know how long we've been going in this, but...
Big Cat just throws......overheaded... I don't know how long we've been going in this, but... Big catch.
Just throws.
Overheaded.
And that's going to go wide again.
What do you mean, Al?
How is that wide?
Where the fuck am I shooting?
Is your guy's goal still there?
Clear frustration on the court right now.
No, didn't I go last?
Wait.
How is that?
How is that? I'll replay the head start.
Mark lining it up with his left hand.
Oh fuck!
Oh!
Yes!
Yes!
Got him! The mousetrap has been triggered.
Got him!
Well that's a clean roll by Titus.
That could get bottom left corner.
No!
That's what he does.
Oh!
Oh!
Wait, where did the mousetrap get him? Did he step on it?
I think he put the ball on it.
Oh, was that? Okay, gotcha, gotcha.
Blindfolded mousetrap, it's more of the shock of the switch, the loud noise.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Brandon, yeah, keeps going, why right?
I love the response of how.
Yeah, how.
Oh, you threw it. Right. I love the response of how. How? Yeah, how? It's killing me every time!
Oh, you threw it.
Seems like that's the whole point of the game.
So you have no idea where it's going.
How?
How?
What?
Yeah, I gotta learn a Brandon impression.
What the hell?
That's pretty good, TJ.
Yeah, mine's not that good.
I- I-
That's me. That's me. How many times have you tried to do a Brandon impression, Zop? Pretty good, TJ. Yeah, mine's not that good. I- I-
How many times have you tried
to do a Brandon impression, Zop?
Every single time he opens his mouth, but I can't get it down.
I don't know why.
Why? Why?
All my days. Yeah, that one's...
I went wide again?!
What the fuck?!
I don't know how to do this.
It's still 1-1.
It's 1-53.
How long have we been going for?
Has this been 20 minutes?
More?
More.
This has been a bit of a drawn-out game.
Still not it at one.
Brandon O!
Five-hole.
Five-hole on Brandon. What was that, Salah? Was it Salah? Salah. Brandon O. Five hole. Five hole on Brandon.
What was that song?
Was it Salah?
Salah.
Salah.
There we go.
Salad.
Salad.
We pronounce it Salah.
So that's 2-1, Titus and KB.
They take the lead.
Again, I thought it was 2-1, Big Cat and Brandon earlier.
Nope, it was only 1-1.
So that goal puts Titus and KB in the lead.
They nutmeg Brandon.
Successful broadcast.
Oh, KB almost knocked it in.
Wait, is that going to go in for KB?
Oh my god!
Count it, count it, count it.
Does that count?
KB just kicked it in unintentionally from across the the court
and it went straight past big cat i don't know if that's going to count i guess not
uh steven j the ref come on win this guy two one two one is still the score they're not going to
count that one even though it was very impressiveudulent ref. That's going right into the yak.
Oh my god.
KB just threw the ball
into the yak. Pretty much right where
he sits on the yak every single day. That was
not even close.
Great
fit by Spider today.
What happened?
Oh, he had a
misplugged recreation.
It's a little wide right. Big Cat with a chance to tie it right here
He goes overhead once again
Are they going to count that?
If Che counts this
He's the most paid rapper of all time
Yep, they're going to count that
That was overhead
Took one bounce and went straight past Mark in the air.
There was one earlier that was like that, and we didn't count it,
but Che is going to count it.
So now we're at 2-2.
Yep.
We might need to heckle the ref a little bit.
Yeah.
I don't know if I can say that on Rumble.
All right, 2-2.
Next goal wins, TJ?
I think Big Catch just said win by two
Oh shit
We might be going for a while, folks
Titus taking his time, trying to misdirect
Big Cat and Brandon with a couple bounces
I love that
I love that
Good old shit, Alzerine
Great comms by Brandon
It's over there I still can't get over Che asking, can they hear? I love that. Good old shit-housery. Great comms by Brandon.
It's over there.
I still can't go over Che asking, can they hear?
As if a blindfold would in any way affect if they can hear.
Was he talking about us in here?
Could they hear us?
I think he was saying, can they hear the ball?
I'm like, probably.
My boy's defense.
They hear Zarkov.
Yeah, sure, sure, sure.
I want this to be over.
I'm tired.
I'm sweating.
My knees hurt.
Liam.
Going horizontal with the phone there.
For what reason? No idea. Oh, KB, that's a good strike, but it's gonna go sailing right.
So no goal there. Still knotted up at two.
Now we got a crowd going in the upper decks.
I think they got bored. There was more people before. I think they have it on the screen.
There is a screen. I don't know what that screen is.
That's what they're watching.
Big Cat angles himself up perfectly in the middle of the floor.
That's probably his worst throw today, right?
Botches it.
Trying to bolt it.
Yeah, they've lost interest. They've lost interest in the upper text.
Alright.
Here we go, Titus.
Oh!
I feel like, I feel like, I'm so slow.
How is it right every time?
That one was looking good until the very last second, too.
How is it right every time?
Fuck.
I'm pretty sure Brandon just touched Spider on the ass unintentionally.
Brandon, you need the ball?
Alright, Brandon now on his approach.
Here, who's got the ball?
Well that could be good.
Stop!
What a save!
What a save!
He was going bottom right corner once again. That got Liam very excited.
You've got to win this.
Please.
What a character.
Please stop.
KB, I wasn't even close.
Okay.
Yeah, straight to spider, as Stephanie just pointed out.
I don't know what Liam is filming. Why is he going horizontal on his boat? Yeah, straight to spider. As Stephanie just pointed out. I don't know what Liam is filming.
What-
Why is he going horizontal on his boat?
Yeah, which platform?
None.
Yeah, but...
Nice shot, Big Cat.
Oh, Big Cat.
He chucks that one in as a...
Oh, man. Fuck!
Just like a relief pitcher.
Oh, tightest. quick roll, quick roll.
Caught the cat off guard, but Big Cat keeps the game alive.
Go, go, go.
Come on, Red Ants.
Stop that ball, whatever it takes.
Use the body.
Yeah, these players are fatigued.
Gassed.
Ran in. Could be good. Straight down the middle, but no! It's stopped by Titus.
Titus has a ton of saves.
Yeah, the stats for him have to be absurd.
Titus might have a double-double.
Wait, what would... MVP maybe?
Yeah, what's the second double there, TJ?
Do I have to explain all the rules of this game?
KB has lost a shoe.
It looks like he's trying to use his shoe as a way of angling up his shot.
That's genius.
And it worked! It worked!
KB!
That's what makes him one of the best players.
With the game winner!
That's some innovation.
And that's why he wins goalball games.
Goes right between Brandon and Big Cat after he angles the shot up with his shoe.
And KB and Titus are going to win it 3-2.
What a match.
Where were you, folks?
Where were you?
On his birthday, no less.
Happy birthday, KB.
It was written.
There was a script for goalball, whatever it was.
How bad was that to watch?
That was incredible.
KB did one of the most athletic things I've ever seen anyone ever do in my life.
I want to see a couple replays.
Did anybody get mousetrapped?
I was trying.
There was one in front of Titus for like 10 minutes.
Did you see how I'm sweating so much right now?
Look at what KB did.
Holy hell.
Wait, do it again, show it again.
That was just a mousetrap.
What is Spider doing?
He would not stop standing in front of the camera.
Oh my god, KB.
I cannot believe that worked.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
That's incredible.
Holy shit.
That was the best case scenario.
Holy shit.
The head save.
That was so hard.
That was fun.
I'm disoriented like crazy.
Well, there's no skill involved.
Oh, I mean, it's easy for you to say because you lost, but.
Can we see a couple other highlights?
Because I feel.
Titus had like 15 saves.
I feel like you did.
Every time I took a shot, I was offline, but it's like we're standing right.
Yeah, every time I threw it, Shay would go, ooh, wide right.
I was like, how could it be wide right?
Big Cat, you were like lining your back up.
Did I sneak back or get close where I just slowly?
Yeah.
Well, the overheads were like, that's not fair.
You kept lining your back up to the goal post to make sure you were straight
and then turning completely.
Wait, I want to see that because I was so frustrating.
I thought I was just shooting it straight every time,
and it just never was there.
Was that electric, TJ? I thought it was just shooting it straight every time, and it just never was there. Was that electric, TJ?
I thought it was fun.
Okay.
I think we need wider goals.
Yeah, the goals that they play with are, like, the length, the width of the room that they're in.
So, like, you can't not hit the goal.
Yeah, so we need that and, like, yeah.
I'm really sweating.
That was fun.
Really fun.
Except it was very disorienting.
I want to see some highlights because I have no idea what we look like.
All right, so this is me finding the middle.
Oh, Connor was doing commentary.
I was putting mask straps around you guys.
Yep, see, there he goes.
I think he's still missing. I. Yep, see? There he goes. I wasn't even.
I think he's still missing.
I think it's still outside his left leg.
See, I was doing that.
Oh, I was so offline.
Look at you guys.
So that would have worked.
You guys never heard it.
I didn't hear it. If I was just even close to being online, I would have been able to do that.
This is very funny.
Oh, my God. That is very funny. Oh, my God.
That is so wide.
Yeah, so wide.
Every time I was getting so frustrated.
I don't understand.
It felt like I was throwing it right down the middle every time.
I pretty much cheated to win.
How?
I looked into it.
Oh, tight is nice.
Oh, this is earlier in the game when we were laying down.
I was trying to squeak the shoes.
Get a little.
Oh, no.
Oh, shit.
What a sport.
What a sport. What a sport.
That's awesome.
Yeah, if we get wider goals, this could be electric.
I want to, like, dive for it.
Yeah.
Yeah, look at the sneak attack.
That could slip right through the middle.
Oh, Kyle.
Last second saved by KV.
That was a lot of fun.
It was.
Yeah, we're going to refine that, and we'll get – we've got to find really wide goals. I do wonder what the rules are on how you throw. Yeah, we're going to refine that, and we'll get –
we've got to find really wide goals.
I do wonder what the rules are on how you throw.
Yeah, we've got to learn the rules.
How hard or, like, how many bounces.
In, like, the Olympic one, they're doing, like, a kickball,
like, spinning wind-up throw.
They're throwing it pretty hard and, like, pretty bouncy.
I think it just has to be underhand.
Yeah, I threw one that was over my head.
Yeah, you drilled me in the shoulder.
One bounced.
Can we see that, where I hit him?
That was, oh, man.
I might be addicted to this game.
Oh, I love it.
We just got to find wide, wide goals.
And I think they got to be short, too.
I don't know how to get better at, like, spatial.
Yeah, I think we need some timeouts in the middle, too,
so you can at least take the blindfold off.
Yeah, see where you are.
Because I was playing good deep.
Motion sickness.
Well, I was just stationary.
All saves were if they threw it right at me.
Oh, man.
Who was the leading goal scorer?
Which of you scored two goals?
He scored two.
I scored one.
Oh.
I honestly don't remember.
You guys had two?
Did you guys both score?
We both scored, yeah.
Titus, your strategy at the end was very good where you did, like, the kicker.
Like, you kind of spaced yourself out to the middle, like, of the free throw line.
Yeah.
You scored a goal on that.
Yeah, I want to see one of my goals.
Titus just got pegged.
Titus just got pegged by me.
I just.
I might go back and watch the whole thing.
Yeah, I know.
I want to see all of it.
The funniest ones are definitely, though, the slow rollers where you can't hear it.
Yeah.
You're just flailing.
Oh, man.
That was fun.
All right.
What a game.
Happy birthday, Kyle.
Birthday, Kyle. No, that's all you wanted when you woke up this morning. That was honestly. All right. What a game. Happy birthday, Kyle. Happy birthday, Kyle.
No, that's all you wanted when you woke up this morning.
That was honestly whatever ball.
What a birthday.
Blind ball toss with the boys.
Yeah.
All right, let's spin our wheel, TJ.
We reset yesterday.
Oh, nice.
It's huge.
All right, so next week, last week before Super Bowl.
Yeah.
I'm going to watch that back.
I have a feeling Connor Griffin was very good on commentary.
Yeah, hopefully people enjoyed it. Yeah, I think it would be great if we just got goals that were as wide as the court.
Yeah.
And then you played like three or four.
I mean, that's incredible.
Jesus Christ.
Can we get this on ESPN, like on SportsCenter tonight?
Seriously.
He went right to the ball.
What the fuck?
Yeah, that honestly, yeah.
Oh, my God.
Tip of the cap to me.
That was sick. Oh, that honestly, yeah. Oh, my God. Tip of the cap to me. That was sick.
Oh, man.
God damn.
That was incredible, Kyle.
That is.
Yeah.
That's worth being on SportsCenter top ten.
I mean, he was illegal outside the goal box.
Yeah.
Oh, man. All right. Thank you, everyone. Happy birthday, he was illegal outside the goal box. Yeah. Oh, man.
All right.
Thank you, everyone.
Happy birthday, Kyle.
Thank you so much.
Appreciate everyone.
Subscribe, please.
We will refine that and get it to be something special.
I feel like there's a future.
Yeah, I think we want two, and then we'll normally have two other guys who can be on the mics yacking.
I think with bigger goals and three on three, though, could play.
It's just such a hilarious game to see us just flailing blind.
I know.
It's a good idea starter.
We'll get it.
I'm so frustrated with myself, though, because I know that all my shots I thought were great,
and they just were all off.
Yeah.
Same.
I was just turning tj so frustrating
wide right way yeah you would set up your shoulders square and then you'd kind of turn
your whole body and then throw it wherever kb you threw one into the studio yes yeah that was crazy
how did that happen i don't know i've never been blind. I think the other part of the game is you've got to go faster paced,
where it's like just keep going.
Yeah.
There should be a clock, yeah.
Yeah.
Because that was actually the thrill is not knowing when the ball was coming.
There should be more than one ball, not like an active at –
but when we throw it and it goes wide, instead of retrieving it,
someone should have just handed you a ball as they're going to get the other one and just go and just go that way we'll perfect this this will be the greatest
sport we've ever played incredible all right uh see everyone on monday have a great weekend It's the act.
Hey, everybody.
Have a good weekend.
Stay safe out there.
And remember, there's lots of chatter in this world about work ethic and this and that.
It's always been the act.
Have a good weekend.
Love you guys. Bye.