The Yak - Brandon's Yak Vacation is Officially Locked In | The Yak 5-8-24

Episode Date: May 8, 2024

I fell asleep on my couch last night...You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up. Hello. Welcome to Yak. Roback.com. Promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase. QZs, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts.

Roback.com. The death of me. Shorts, shorts, shorts. Promo code Yak. Yeah. Why do you guys need me and Nickorts, shorts, shorts. I'm gonna code Yak. Yeah. Why do you guys need me and Nick to wear shorts? They want to see more of us. I can't imagine going through life that way. I'm somewhat uncomfortable in this chair with these angles.

But it's the summer. It's the summertime. But it's not. It's not the summer, but it's summer weather. I will wear shorts. I don't want to be the only one you can see my underwear. I'm like an 85 degrees and up shorts guy. Yeah, it's not hot enough yet.

Right. It's not happening at all this summer. There we go. They're right. They're right. Thank you. They're right. They're stuck.

They're stuck in my shoes. That was a big reveal. Super. Now you're all stuck. That's how the Midwest works. As soon as it gets over 50 degrees for the first time, you throw the shorts on. I understand.

Listen, I would love to wear shorts. You don't have a rationale. I have to do squats again. You're a fridge with two thorns? You don't have to do squats to do shorts. No, you don't. We all know what it is. I'm also, look at me.

No, but okay, so here's the problem is I know what it is, you know what it is, but what if i could make it different so i'm just i haven't started my squat regimen yet i'm going to i'll do it right after the show show us now i bet you not the way you said it no not the way you said it no no if you had come at me a different way. Yeah, the way you did. You were pre-laughing. You were pre-laughing. Show us. You could be seen as brave.

Like there's lots of guys with tough legs. I don't want to be brave. I'm a pussy. The brave guys always die. They do. I'll never be brave. Everyone's like, oh, that guy was so brave. You know what's awesome? It always was brave. It's like, oh, that guy was so brave. You know what's awesome? It always was brave. It's like being bigger in a bikini. Wearing shorts with little legs is fine.

Bravery is the most overrated trait anyone could ever have. Even when you're saying someone is brave right now, you're like, that guy's kind of like a loser. If you walked out here in a bikini, we're like, oh, my God, you're brave as fuck. That's so insulting. that's an insult yeah i like seriously i don't i can't think of anything worse than being brave who wants brave's an insult inspiring you get it for like you get everyone's like oh man that was so brave at your funeral yeah yeah yeah yeah right jesus yeah oh he ran into that building to save those kids. All the kids are alive.

This brave guy, that sucks. Shout out to brave people, though. Shout out. We do need them. We do need you guys. We're getting dangerously close to some stolen valor. No, no, no. Listen.

You throw on shorts. I'm basically a firefighter. Getting a brave discount at Walmart. I think it's more important to know that the brave people out there, I can't do that. And no one needs to fake bravery. There's brave people and not brave. Exactly. I'm in the not brave.

Faking bravery will cause more harm than good. Right. Right. Because if my number gets called, I'll be like, ah, that bravery thing. Or if you're on a plane, is there a brave person here? No. Not me. They'll turn to Kyle and I.

You're born wearing shorts. Yeah, I think you're born with bravery. Those guys are so brave. Yeah. And it's a very admirable thing to have that some of us just will never have. Yeah. Just getting involved in things. You're brave, Brandon.

You are brave. Wearing those, Brandon. You are brave. Wearing those fucking socks, that's brave. What are those socks? That's brave. This is Toucan Sam. Follow your nose. Let's give it a little bit of like, hey kids, aren't my socks fun? You know what the cinnamon toast is?

Yeah. I'm not like those other yakos. I'm the cool guy. I'm goofy. It's Toucan Sam from the cereal. Oh, you're the guy from Quick Picks with the weird socks. You're basically just Tom Hanks from Big. Oh, my God.

Like, if you were walking in my local park alone with those socks up, I would, like, shuffle my kids away a little bit. Am I dating myself with the reference of Biggs? No. Tom Hanks in Bigg. He goes to a fortune teller. He's a 12-year-old boy, and he suddenly becomes a grown man, but he has a 12-year-old boy inside

of him. You dress like a toy inventor. Yeah, that is what you are. Yeah, you do. You're a gizmo guy. You dress like a gizmo guy. You're a gizmo guy. You dress like a gizmo guy. You're a gizmo guy. You're a gizmo and what gadgets. I like dressing how I want to dress. I like that you do.

It's brave. You love having a 12-year-old boy inside of you. No, it's not that. I just like colorful socks. That's all. It's just the socks. You want people to stop you and be like, whoa, what are those? And they often do.

It worked on us i like to wear my outfits are picked out like how could i camouflage into everything i try to look like a background character at all times are we ready for friday though yeah no you're gonna brave i don't know if mine's gotten to the house yet but mine has yeah yeah ours has oh i have to. What underwear are you wearing? None. With linen? If your camera flash goes off, we're getting a show. I don't think you can wear underwear with linen. I'm not ready.

Are you ready for today, Brandon? I'm not. I don't know what today means. What did we leave for today? It's Wednesday. Got it. Have a game tonight. But what else did we leave for today on the Yak?

You're picking where you're going. Yeah. I thought you guys picked it. Well, we started to pick it last night, and then we're like, you know what? Let's give Brandon some more options. So we have presentations on, I think, what do we have, six different locations? Maybe five. I submitted one.

Okay, so once they're ready. Y'all actually did presentations? Yeah. Not really presentations. Threw them together. We sent lists to Luke Blutman. Quick itinerary. Two-day itinerary.

Yeah. So you're picking based off itinerary. But we've left out the states, so you have to pick blind resume. Okay, so I'm going on itinerary and general feeling. Correct. Okay, all right. There are photos of the hotel. You picked the hotel.

Mine might have the itinerary. Okay. Yeah, there's two days. The rest of the vacation is you. Did you each get assigned a state? No, we picked them. We picked. Okay, all right.

Picked random ones. Out of the whatever amount we landed on. Did you guys do this on the yak after i left or no we have a group text side do you remember that aaron foster text from last week that was us oh yeah yeah you know the group chat's called no fucking fat so's no gizmos no gizmo man um wait is c-bob still here i want him to come down oh he was sitting with megan No, man. Wait, is T-Bob still here? I want him to come down here. He was sitting with Megan.

Can you find that picture of T-Bob? Speaking of shorts, this is what I'm afraid. Well, I guess I'm not afraid of this because I don't have the meat that T-Bob has. But he had an angle today on Wake Up Mincy that was quite shocking. Just so much leg. Yeah, for an angle to stick out on that show. It's still here? All right, so wait to show it.

Find it. The host doesn't have angle. No, tell him to come down. Yeah, by the way, Mincy, shout out Mincy for being there for Jerry last night. Jerry completed his marathon. He completed it 6, 7 in the morning today. Yeah. Insane. jerry completed his marathon he completed it six seven in the morning today yeah yeah insane he's

he might there's like not there's a non-zero chance he's paralyzed now did he have blisters did he show that if he he's yeah so can what i fell asleep what what happened he completely i think he fell asleep on the treadmill for a little bit um but i i think there's a chance that like the 26 miles was all the steps Jerry's legs had left like he had to use those 26 miles for the next 40 years his physical right imitation those were supposed to be saved up and used sparingly over 40 years and he used them all last night so you say he's paralyzed yeah he's paralyzed if something, he's paralyzed. He doesn't work anymore. If something happens to Jerry during a challenge, is Lucas, is that manslaughter? Fun fact, security guard Mike texted me last night, and I was very confused why he texted it until I realized what was going on. He texted and said that all of our security guards at the front are EMT trained.

Oh. So, bang. T-Bob. Helpful, yeah. A bear is here. What's up? What's up, boys? What's going on?

People don't know him. And lady. Look at that. There he is. Look at that. That's it right there. Yeah, that's big. All right, T-Bob, thanks for coming on.

Bro, these are heavy. I used to be able to bench. Wow. Not to brag. I'm coming aggressive here. I used to be able to bench 445 pounds, and I've never done a single pull-up in my life. But what about squat?

He's ham hocks. What about squat? Wait, the bench? The legs affect your bench? No, no, no. I'm saying, like, I was strong as fuck, but I still could never do a single pull-up. God.

You don't need to. Why would you need to? Where's your peak squat? 680, dude. Oh, wow. 680. Damn. My thighs don't touch when my feet are together.

My problem my entire life has been my thighs touching constantly. Yeah. I've had an internal battle with chafing. Yeah. So T-Bob is, you can tune in, he's got shows going all the time down at LSU, Baton Rouge, played for LSU, great dude, also friend of Mincy over a decade. Yes.

So me and Mincy met in a very interesting way, buying drugs at Mardi Gras. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And I was like, bro, who the fuck is this? Like his voice, his vibe. He was a professional poker player at the time. And like I said, I'm a morning radio host.

And so I was like, man, we don't have like any gambling. This was kind of before like gambling was getting legalized and everything. But I was like, you know, we do a sports show. We should have like somebody do picks. And I was like, this voice, like I want my gambler to sound to sound degenerate right and you hear that voice and it immediately kind of like oh fuck dude like this dude just stays in casinos probably smoking joes all the time and so and so we went and so i was like bro come on the show or whatever and yeah man we kind of got to we got to know each other from there and then he started doing radio in treeport

i go up there with him and or on fridays i go on his show and then he started doing radio in baton rouge and then uh yeah then y'all picked him up after his kentucky reaction lane kiffin's first sec win dude yeah and you you said that he uh he called you once and he basically in 2018 he told you his whole plan bro Bro, this shit was crazy. So he, in 2018, this is a power of manifestation, I suppose. But in 2018, he called me. It was an afternoon LSU game. And I don't like talking on the phone, like, at all.

So I don't know what kind of mood he caught me in. But, I mean, he sat there and talked to me for, like, two hours. And I don't know what he was on, but, you know, he was in it somewhere. Yeah, he was. But it was all about like music and New Orleans and like I want to like make this different kind of show that's not going to be like the sports. It's going to be like all music and I'm going to be in the scene and all this sort of stuff. And like, you know, it's which again, maybe not like not, like, to the T, is it what it is?

Oh, no, no, no, no. It pretty much, like, fucking happened, dude. Like, it just meant all New Orleans not working, going to bad-ass, like, music festivals and shit. Yeah. Yeah, I guess. He has kind of manifested that. And it became, and he, like, works at bars. He's, like, a celebrity in the South now.

Like, it, like It really actually happened. Brandon. We were talking this morning. He manifested, but Mincy in his life has never executed anything. Correct. In Mincy's brain, he's like, I'm the music expert at Barstool. And I'm like, no one sees it that way. He looks in the mirror and he's like, I'm the music critic at Barstool.

But isn't that the exact power of manifestation? If you're not burdened with, like, if you're not burdened with self-reflection, good shit can just happen to you sometimes, dude. That's a great point, because, like, a Steven and a Mincy, the self-reflection is always at an all-time low, and they're able to just power through. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, if you're, like, I have i have like i'm sure everybody is right like imposter syndrome everything so you just

constantly think you fucking suck at shit right like i always get jealous of the people who so clearly are just like no like this is good like i'm the man like this is gonna be awesome right like i yeah like just i'll just i'll just fucking roll and it's like not a problem yeah like damn dude it's like qb1 attitude Yeah. Like, damn, dude. It's that QB1 attitude. Those legs are so good. I can't stop looking at them. I'm trying not to. It's so funny, too, because like.

Why do you wear shorts that short? I love it. Well, I guess, yeah, and also Louisiana is like the. It's so hot, dude. It's so hot. It's all I packed right before I came up here. And then I figured out it was still like Kind of 50 degrees here Is that your ass cheek?

No you have to go a little lower Look at that thing Look at that It's like the biggest turkey leg of all time Me and Megan were talking about that I was like If we ever get stranded I'm just gonna tell the group like guys

You gotta kill me I will feed the village If we ever get stranded, I'm just going to tell the group, like, guys. Yeah. You got to kill me. We have to. Like, I will feed the village. But just, like, when you kill me, I don't want to see you coming. So, like, maybe when I'm asleep, like, give me a bunch of Xanax and I'll pass out. Just lightly gnaw on your leg while you're sleeping. Well, Megan said something fucked up. She was like, well, yeah, I'll, like, give you, like you some drugs to paralyze you and keep you alive so the meat stays fresh.

Oh, that is true. I was like, whoa, I thought you were going to knock me out. That's some saw shit. That's some walking dead shit. She sure just thought about this. Yeah, for sure. I mean, she saw the legs. So, of course, right?

It's hard not to see the legs. Good, Brandon? I'm good. Good. I'm having fun. It's all his fault. Really? He's the first domino.

Shorts and shorts. Yeah, no, he is the first domino. Because he took the call from Mincy and gave him the power of being like. So I don't know the truth of this either. Mincy called you and just wanted to talk about himself? Yeah. Crazy. So I don't know if this is true.

Or I don't know the actual full truth of this, but Dave has always followed me on Twitter very randomly. I don't know why. And I think when I retweeted that Kentucky video is when it got on y'all's radar. It's his fault. So I am the literal genesis. You created the monster. Brandon.

Dr. Bob. I live to Dr. Bob. Next play. You want to do the gauntlet? Yeah. Let's see these legs in action. Hell yes, dude. Okay, so what do I need to do? Do we have to chase video? Yeah, I guess play chase legs in action. Hell yes, dude. Okay, so what do I need to do? Do we have to chase video? Yeah, I guess play chase video.

Oh, God. Is it bad? All right, we're not going to give you any tips besides what this video says. Okay. Let's see. This is a great test to see if we can actually show this to anyone else.

It's a good video. It's a good video is what Chase just said. It's a good video. I wonder why you say that. Malasek, I think, is in the gambling cave. This is a great video. It is a great video. It's a great video.

I mean, T-Bob, you got a voice for radio on the legs for a Brazilian Instagram. Bro, I've actually always thought that in a different reality, I'm kind of like a male thotty. You would crush on OnlyFans? Yeah, like you would crush cans with your legs or crush things. I would like to see. Because I got like a fat ass too. Yeah.

Right? So if I just really wanted to put that on display. I don't know how to say this any other way. You'd be good to look at while you're riding. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Riding like. Yeah. to put that on display? I don't know how to say this any other way. You'd be good to look at while you're riding. Yeah. Riding like... Yeah, I'd like to watch you ride. If you rode one of us, it would be good too.

I'd love to watch you ride. Bro, I just... Man, that's a lot of weight, dog. Wait, wait. I don't know. Do dudes ride each other? I walk... You go in reverse cowboy.

I know, but... Yeah, for sure. Why can't I picture it in my head? It's always just bent over. No, dude. Wait, wait, wait. Wait, dad, do dudes ride? Do dudes take a sexy ass bounce?

Isn't riding being on. Yeah, on top. Yeah. Facing away, like, just like. Yeah, but do dudes ride? Wait, you. I don't know if dudes ride. Wait, y'all think that gay men only fuck each other from behind?

Yeah. No, but in my head, I can't envision a male rock. Think about it. You'd be riding. You'd probably be jerking off at the same time. Okay. Yeah. Okay.

I hope I'm texting the right pal. Still not hitting. Oh, yeah. But I'm going to go. Call him right now and say, hey, do you fucking, do you ride? All right, I'll call him. Brandon, what's wrong, dude? Are you jealous I got to go to Wrigley last night?

No, I was at Wrigley last night yeah I was on the third row in the first baseline that kind of steals my thunder I was at ball practice I mean that's the craziest part about being out here is I have like three little kids at home and so I've been doing like 12 hours of shows a day

and it is incredibly easier than like day to day life of taking care of all the kids. 100%. I feel so bad for my wife. Shout out to Caitlin. Look at that thing. That's Che. It's still spinning. That looks fake. That's fake.

What the fuck is going on? He does that like every day. Not that long. It goes forever. It's all past not answering. He's probably riding. day. Not that long. It goes forever. So Pat's not answering. He's probably riding. He's got to be riding. Oh, Kamasta.

I don't have Kamasta's. Kamasta has a new cooking show out. Oh, so he's just the spinning guy. That's his best skill by far. By far. Why doesn't he lead with that? Just walk up to someone and just spin a football? Yeah.

Kind of a power move. that was the wrong Pat. Okay, I'm calling Joe. He just texted a different Pat. Hey, man, have you ever riden on Joe? I have five Pats, and I don't change their names. They're just all Pat, and I fuck it up all the time. Just call the security guard, ask him if he rides. I think it might have been the security guard.

Jay is really good at that. Yeah. Let's see the video, though. He's not good at that. Yeah. Let's see the video, though. He's not good at that. Okay, so we already watched this. This is the Yak Gauntlet tutorial. Here's our helpful guide, Brandon. Why are you doing it like a new perfect video?

I've never done a new perfect before. Nick, count me down. From what? Three, two, one, start. Okay. Three, two, one. Now you pick up your bags. You can pick up multiple at a time.

Start with cornhole. Now you pick up your bags. Make a bag. God, make a bag. Oh, my God, this is the worst thing ever. I stopped making a sound. Get it like, maybe. Our goalie, Jake Malicek.

We got three soccer balls. So you did it at it. He's going to try and kick it into the net. If you don't succeed on a class We're gonna close so many claps is something burning. I smell something burning smells like a plastic right? Yeah He didn't make a shot. I'm burning you can hit it with one hand. Oh shit with Now Brandon's got a left foot. Football! Football! Football! This is a great video! You have to open this black line, you gotta hit one of the body armor bottles dead on. And you gotta get your own rebound.

You wanted to clap there, the ball was in the way. Doesn't count because it went off the wall. Look at that! What's he doing? Three pointer! Three pointer! Move to basketball. Are you trying to be sexy? He's gotta work it.

He's getting in his zone. He's getting confident. I like that. Could have ended that part. We're playing a game of Sporkle. You gotta answer 10 questions as fast as you can. Be careful because TJ's typing. Oh my god. The part that we get the most criticism for is that we don't explain Sporkle well. And Chay just didn't explain Sporkle.

There's a lot of, there's more questions. Like, who's TJ? What is Sporkle? Yep. What is Sporkle? I should be concerned about TJ's typing. There'll be trivia up on the board, and you just have to get ten answers. There's, like, different categories.

You can hop around. You can answer any question you see. Okay. You just yell out the answers, and you gotta get ten of them. Fuck yes, dude. All right. Ready, Brandonon i kind of got my adrenaline pumping a little bit yeah to pee like my stomach hurts a little bit yeah oh decent video uh titus did you like the video i loved it i thought i thought he touched on everything we needed to there's no way that t-bob knows what he has to do he explained everything very clearly but also he fucked

me through the camera and he did and i appreciated that little touch over under seven and a half claps in that video it was very flirty so was so flirty the bow he bowed for you all right sorry here okay do you ever get lusted after online? Robots. Robots. So your own kind. Wait, you didn't follow the first rule in Che's video. Can't have the backstory. The video didn't really... All right, here we go.

Three, two, one, go. All right, here we go. Three, two, one, go. All right, here we go. All right, T-Bob up on the go. Lefty. A lot of lefties have been coming through. Don't panic. Well, no one's going to see the videos we did yesterday.

That was all lefties, basically. Oh, no. All on the board, at at least For what it's worth Nothing Oh he's bad Oh Pat's calling me back Yeah it was It was my bad it was wrong Pat

Do dudes ride? Do I drive? No do dudes ride? Do I drive? No, do dudes ride? Two dudes. I don't know what that is. All right, okay. All right, I'll talk to you later, Pat. Sorry, I meant to hit up the other Pat.

Oh, was that a straight Pat? Okay, no problem. All right, see ya. Yeah, that was security guard Pat. Security guard. Do dudes drive? All right, he's doing well. Yeah, he is.

Oh. Oh, nice. All right. I think the shorts look cool standing up. Yeah, sitting down, they... It's the chair. There's a lot going on. Oh, a little spin of the ball.

He's kind of crushing it. He's got nice... There it is. There you go. Former D1 athlete. Remember to bring the rack. Whoa. Oh. Oh.

Nice. In here, trivia See Che Remember when Che did the whole come follow me Alright, any of these Like eight states that begin and end with a vowel Fuck, I can't read any of this Alright, we'll help you Seven teams that Patrick Beverly has played on

T-Wolves. Wait, eight parts of speech. I have to name all eight? No, no, you do it. Oh, okay, okay, okay. You can jump around. Preposition, adjective, verb, noun. Hold on.

Chris Webber. Yep. Oh, my God. Chris Webber. Yep. Oh, my God. Fucking Michigan coach. Six branches of the U.S. military. Okay. Army, Navy, Air Force. Chris Jackson.

No. Let's see. What is it? Three teams with colors black and silver. You need one more. I just need one more Raiders? Yeah, there we go. Done.

That's a great time. I fucking hate Cornhole. Yeah. That was a great time. How'd it do? Beat Cam Newton. Okay. But I heard he couldn't do the football thing.

Yeah, we just say that forever. Irony defined. You just barely missed beating Alex Caruso. Fuck. I didn't beat Kyle Long. He never beat Kyle Long in anything, dude. No, that's true. He's always better at football than me.

Yeah, he was good at football. Yeah. Yeah. I thought we were so tight because he was on that Oregon team that we beat the fuck out of back in the day, and then he just ended up being incredible. Yeah. It was really good. All right, well, T-Bob, thank you for stopping by by thank you all so much for having me dude this was awesome yeah

damn so i didn't get you no well fuck me it was the cornhole dude yeah b-walk thanks for the help man that was nice yeah you're welcome you're a nice guy and you never want to show it but you have you have it you have a golden what do you what he doesn't ever want to show it. You're right. You should try something. You're right. What are you doing? I'm just saying thank you. It's been a very fun day.

Contrary to what everyone says, you're a nice guy. I don't think everybody says that, though. Yeah, everybody says you're a fucking asshole and they hate you, but you're the worst. You're good to the ones you love. Thank you. All right, guys. Well, hey, thank you all so much. Have the ones you love thank you thank you yeah all right guys well hey thank you so much have a great day thank you that's a good time i'll say it's a delight all right so that was that was pat security guard pat

whoops he does not have an answer for us. He said, do dudes drive? Exclusively. I'll call other Pat. Before I do that, DraftKings, the NBA playoffs are heating up and so is the action. DraftKings Sportsbook an official sports betting partner of the NBA. Teams are knocking on the door of the conference finals. DraftKings Sportsbook

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It's that simple. Quick Picks has a parlay today for Knicks versus Pacers. Stephen Che has a ladder bet. Lots of stuff going on in the DraftKings Sportsbook, and if you're new to DraftKings, check this out new customers bet five bucks to get 150 in bonus bets instantly download the draft king sportsbook app now and use code yak that's code yak for new customers get 150 in bonus bets when you just when you bet just five bucks only on draft kings crown is yours steven shea was pathetic last night just begging the NBA. Yeah, I was.

It was so sad. Dude, I'm going to be honest. That was the worst score cap game I've seen in three years. Yeah. So if it's for my bet, I fight for my people. Yeah. But you looked really sad. Don't care.

I got one of them overturned. Yeah. Afterwards. Should have been three. We should have won, but we didn't. Now, Brandon, you watched the Pop-Tart movie? I watched the first 25 minutes of it and um this movie is taking us it's written it's written to a junior high audience like it's it's just the dialogue the fact that jerry seinfeld came up with some of that is or is in

whatever but it's it's bad yeah is it zero out of a hundred i wouldn't say so because there's some cute cereal related stuff in there that you know hits you where your kid button is i can't believe this is a real movie there's some cute cereal related describing it's like there's no way this is it hits you in the kid button it does but like a kid button like a commercial would uh yeah yeah i mean literally uh at least i saw 25 minutes it just goes back to like the early 60s and all the serial character mascots are taken off and tony the tiger and snap crackle pop and all this and it's all like kid button it's it hits the kid button it's like barbie you're a nostalgia guy too i'm a nostalgia guy but the the jokes were just so bad and the dialogue

is so bad jerry seineld's acting is just weird. I disagree, but art is subjective. I gotta watch this movie. I do too. I know. I feel like I gotta see it. It's not zero out of a hundred like Jeff DeLosa. What would you give it? What's it closer to though? Zero or 9.2? It's closer to zero than it is

9.2. It's way closer to zero than 9.2. What would you give it? First 25. Three. That's way closer to zero than 9.2. What would you give it? First 25? Three. That's almost worse than zero. I mean, the fact that you watched the first 25, and I know you probably had to go to bed, but still, if it was a really good movie, you don't stop.

I did have to go to bed, and yes, you're right. Is there a chance that it got worse after that 25 and it could go to zero? I'm going to watch the next 25 tonight. Nice. It goes melatonin, 20 minutes of a movie, bedtime. So after I take my melatonin, I'll turn it on and see what happens. Trey did own you in the group chat last night about Seinfeld.

No, he didn't. I missed that. Do you think this is extended of the Seinfeld universe? How long have you watched? 25 minutes. Did you like Seinfeld? Yes, but this is not Seinfeld humor. I beg to differ based on him starring in the movie.

I can't wait. Yeah. Exactly. It literally is Seinfeld humor. It's not. No, what you should have said is it's not Larry David humor. I guess I could have said that. That's what you should have said.

But just because Seinfeld played Seinfeld and then he's – And Seinfeld, right? He played Seinfeld and Seinfeld? He played Seinfeld and Seinfeld, but is his character Seinfeld in this? No. And Seinfeld, right? He played Seinfeld and Seinfeld. He played Seinfeld and Seinfeld. But is his character Seinfeld in this? No. Yeah, what's the premise? He's.

He's like. But it is Jerry Seinfeld's humor. He meets a kid at a diner and the kid has run away from home and he orders Pop-Tarts and Jerry's like, you want to know how those started? And he's an executive at, he's rehashing, he's an executive at Kellogg, I think, or Post, Kellogg. Okay. And he's telling the story about the competitive launch of the Pop-Tart between Kellogg's and Post.

That sounds exactly like the greatest sitcom ever made, arguably. That sounds exactly the same. I don't understand where the disconnect is. You didn't think Master of My Domain was funny? It was... Somebody else watch the movie, please. I will. I will.

Somebody give me 20 minutes of the movie. I'm going to watch it tonight. I'm going to watch it tonight for you. Yeah. And I'm getting you out of this character. You're not doing this much longer. You get like a week of this. What are you talking about?

This pro Che character of yours. You need to come in and like, oh, how have we not made a Stephen Che, Che Guevara shirt? Whoa. Oh. What the fuck? I can see a lot of reasons. Yeah, that's awesome. How did we not think of that?

Yeah, we have to do it. We have to do it. It needs to be Stephen Che as Che Guevara. We'll sell at least two. It must be done on the double, really. Whoever's listening to this right now, Quicks, Triggs, or anyone. Can it say no bitch-assness underneath it?

We need this shirt bad. Does Stephen Chay know who Che Guevara is? No chance. Give a guess. Hold on. Can I guess what his guess could be? I think the only thing that he could potentially get here is Rage Against the Machine. No.

No. I'm just going to go soccer player. Soccer player, for sure. Yeah. I was thinking. All right. Uh-oh. Give us the country as well.

Don't know the country. Okay. Something South America, I believe. Okay. I think he is who the movie the motorcycle diaries is based on oh i have not seen that movie but i remember the previous uh yeah he knows yeah let's get that shirt he knows who he is yeah should it be just che or should it be che guevara just che just. Just Che. Yeah, and just looking like a...

Is it that old familiar image and we're putting Che's face on it? Yes. With a little star over it, right? Yeah, the communist... Yeah. Yeah, right. That should just be Che.

Oh, that'll look perfect. And she'll just say Che on it. Is he a bad guy? No, he was like the... Well... A little bit. Sometimes a little bit. Is he a bad guy? No, he was like the... Well... Yes and no, right? Sometimes a little bit.

Is he a murderer? Yes and no. It was part of a revolution. Depends on who you ask. It was part of a revolution. I would say, though, he's not... It's more Fidel was the bad guy. Yeah, yes and no.

Yes and no. Like you. Oh, he's Cuba? Castro? Yeah, Cuba. Cuba, yeah. They're U.S. now, right? No. No, he's Cuba? Castro? Yeah, Cuba. Cuba, yeah. Ah. They're U.S. now, right? No. No, they're Cuba now.

They are U.S. Oh, we take that? Yeah, they are a part of. You're doing great, Jay. Keep going. Did we acquire Cuba? You made your bed, Titus. You're killing it, man.

We have Cuba now. It's ours. Or no, Cat played on the Cuban team, right? Is that right? Or no? No. We're Cuba now. It's ours. Or no, Cat played on the Cuban team, right? Is that right? No. We're deeper now. No, no, Titus. Keep going with it. Who did Calipari coach?

It was Cuba. You're killing it. Dominican? Dominican Republic? Yeah. I think he coached Puerto Rico. Or was it Dominican Republic? What's wrong? What did I do?

He doesn't like the way his shorts look on the... Headphones. Oh. We can fix that. We can fix that, Kyle. We can just fix that, Kyle. Yeah, we can fix it after the show. No, but I don't want...

I don't want to interrupt the show. But you're... I can't fix it. Don't want to interrupt the show. You sit right there. I know, I can't. I couldn't hear anything. Couldn't hear Che the whole time

You missed some good shit You thought Cuba was an American territory? Yes That is good shit Where are you going? Am I moving? Yeah yeah yeah I sit next to Nick though

Let's do a whole switch up I bet you we'll interact differently. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to stay right here. No, I'm going to stay. Okay, you're going to stay? I wanted to see for a while.

Oh, so Brandon, now you're going to be screwed. Oh, yeah, your headphones don't work. You hear me? Your headphones don't work at all. Hey, Brandon. No, that's what I've been dealing with. Turn it up, TJ. Hey, fuck you, Brandon.

This is weird over here. It's really weird. It's like a different function. I'm on a different show. Different party. I guess I'll look really muscular. I don't like this. This is bugging me out.

Yeah, I know. I'm not moving until Kyle moves. The headphones are, I can hear him, but they're not high enough. So we'll get them fixed and then I'll move. Oh, Stephanie's right there. I'll report back when the headphones are fixed. Brandon, did you break it to your wife that you are taking a little trip? They don't know anything yet.

Oh. In fact, I'm going to break all of it to them. Like, hey, by the way, we're going to go on a vacation soon, and also we're going to do two days or three days in wherever this vacation is. Are you still going to do the Hawaii vacation? I don't know. I think you should do Hawaii, and this should be a solo thing. With the birds.

That's like 20% content. But Tommy can go too, right? Yeah. Yeah. Actually, you and Tommy. Yeah. Yeah. So I think I'm either going to Alaska or –

Well, no. Was Alaska not one of them? You're going to get a lot of options. You don't know. Menu. You don't know the options. Okay. Yeah. I don't like it over options. You don't know. Menu. Options, okay, yeah. I don't like it over here.

I don't like it over here either. Y'all look further away over here. I did another poll today. I'm closer to cake. Oh, no. Yeah. Oh, boy. Polish dude.

Yeah, I was. Like me. I wrote another. Molly the astrologist. Okay. And I'm meeting with her next Wednesday morning. She's going to. Well, why don't we just have her come on the yak?

Yeah. She could. What does she do? She does. She asked for my birthday where I was born. All this background info that maybe I shouldn't have given her over the phone. Oh, whoa. This is really loud now.

Yeah, it's very loud. It's everybody's butt years? Yeah. Actually, don't involve us in your scams. Yeah, I probably shouldn't. Do you ever hear back from What's the Matter Baby? It's going to cost me $150. She's going to do what?

She's going to give me new images. I wrote it down. Well, it's getting louder. Yeah, it's getting louder yeah yeah it's getting louder um our mic's getting louder or headphones she's gonna refresh the images in my soul oh oh that's worth only 150 for only 150 it's throwing me i'm like who said that where this is really messy what are the images in your soul refresh the what does any of those words mean in this context she's gonna do my natal chart. Is that a woman thing?

Is that a vagina? I have no idea. Is natal breast or pussy? Natal sounds woman. It's your umbilical cord, right? Natal is woman. Woman. That's a woman.

That's a woman. She's doing the woman. She's refreshing your anatomy. Oh, my God. You're going to be all new. I don't have a natal. Do we have natals? I hope to god not. Oh, neonatal, yeah. It's of the womb, right?

That's why I had to tell her when I was born. Loud, loud, loud. It's super loud. She even knew what time I was born. She's reupholstering your natalism? She's going to ride my soul. Yeah. Huh. She's going to ride, my soul. That's nice. She's probably excited.

Oh. Yeah, it was good. Yeah? Guys ride? Pat said, fuck yeah. It's sick because you can have a conversation with the homie while you're doing it. Can send it if needed. Nobody rides for conversation. what about reverse cow cowboy

that's for what is that for that would just be cowboy what that's for the view of the person what's cowboy what's cowgirl cowgirl is okay yeah reverse yeah. He's going to send me a video, isn't he? Oh, yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And it will be him. It is every time. It is every time. God damn it. Brandon, how are the headphones?

Useless. Because I really want to go back to my seat. Yeah, same. They're still very loud, right? Very loud. Yeah, very loud. All right, let's go back to our seat. All right.

Kyle, you can stay there. I just miss you so much. Yeah, no, we'll be fine. Didn't know where to look when any of you were talking. Really messed me up. TJ, do we have the slideshows ready?

I don't know what the reveals are because you guys didn't tell Luke Bluntman which state is which. That's part of it. Okay, so I don't know either. We'll tell him. Okay.

Are our headphones still really loud? Uh-huh. Yeah. Very loud. Should we turn them all down, Stephanie? Kyle's just being knocked over here, just screwed up everyone's. No, it was nice of Kyle to get up and move. It would have derailed the show.

Yeah. Honestly, yeah, someone coming in and doing like work on my mic yeah i don't know how long it takes is it mechanical or just like a button push all right so i don't know audio i don't know anything about audio nothing it's infinitely confusing it's a mystery so confusing and So confusing. And how do we get bad audio? We find out. It's not advancing with other tech. Right.

Audio should be wireless. We're just living. Audio should be perfect. Oh, now I think we went back down. Oh, I can't hear myself at all. No, we're good. I can't hear anything. I can't hear.

Hello. Hello. Hi. Is it bad for the people watching right now, TJ? Oh, they're fine. Oh, okay, good. Oh. So they just have no idea what we're struggling with.

Did you guys have fun making your itineraries? I learned a lot. No. No, it took me like two seconds. Why did you set out to learn? Prolonged and tedious fuss. I like really got into it. Okay, so Brandon, are you ready?

So here's what we're going to you're gonna i'm so loud again yeah uh you're so lost oh my god it's worse you're you're going to we're we're going to give you six slideshows and these are the six finalists of states okay so these and i might do the full vacation here just though you're two days but i might go seven no no the two days is just what you have to do okay okay so you have the all the other five days are family time oh i see okay right but two days is what you require for this assignment correct okay correct and you can then decide afterwards if you'd rather bring your birds or your family one or the other

are you ready? and we're not going to consider a technicality that since it did Hawaii on the next spin somehow I should have been afforded another no we would have told you by now because it did land on the very

next spin alright let's go with number one All right. Because it did land on the very next spin. All right. Yeah. Let's go with number one. Sure. We don't even know what number one is. So I'm going to do a zip line tour, Chick-fil-A.

Okay. Let's start. Yeah. Hold on. Slow down. Slow down. Slow down. So June 21st. Yeah.

And June 21st. And that will be June 22nd. So I'm starting with a, oh, I'm staying in this meditation yurt right here. Yeah, the yurt. So I'm staying in that yurt. Me and Tommy will be living in that yurt. Correct. Just two days.

We will go on a zipline tour. I think you would love that a lot. Chick-fil-A, that works very well. Sounds like a great one. Cosplay American Anime Con dressed as Trunks from Dragon Ball Z. Okay. That'd be funny. lot um chick-fil-a that that works very well a great one uh cosplay american anime con dressed as trunks from dragon ball z okay that'd be funny how much is that costume gonna run it's a big old sword i think okay dinner at sullivan's steakhouse ghosts and ghouls walking ghost tour so then i'm gonna i'm gonna go to bed and wake up in my yurt

on June 22nd. Lunch at Chick-fil-A. I'm going to shop at the Mill Outlet Village. I'm going to have dinner at the Fiction Kitchen vegan restaurant. I'm going to go to a Jene Aiko concert. That little sexy thing. Jene Aiko?

Aiko? Jene Aiko. So how would you rate this? Again again don't decide till the end okay five being just a boring day at home but not bad all right ten being the best trip ever one being like hell okay okay so let's just pull it up so i can go off just go individual bullet points here um not big for the ghosts and ghouls walking ghost tour. I don't get into shit like that. Dinner, dinner. Is it ghosts or ghouls? It's ghosts and ghouls.

But no, but like which one gets you? The ghosts. So you could probably just hop on the second half of the tour. Just the ghouls? Yeah. Um, so Chick-fil-A lunch. I appreciate that. Dinner at Sullivan Steakhouse sounds wonderful.

Uh, I don't. Okay. So if it's me and Tommy and I'm Trunks from Dragon Ball Z, who is he? Gohan. Could? Gohan. Could be Gohan. Mm-hmm. Okay. Zipline Tour sounds...

You know what? What do you think Tommy would think? I think he would... I think Tommy would put this at like a nine. There you go. A nine or a ten. I would put this at like a... Is this like a six?

The Zipline Tour? He's going to love that. We're going to love that. How would he do at the outlet mall? Just shopping around? I think he'd do very well. I think he'd do very well. We'd just buy him a bunch of Pokemon cards. Are you a ghost or a ghoul guy? I'm not a ghost or a ghoul guy.

But if you had to pick? A ghoul over ghost, I think. Every time. Did I ever tell you guys in college one of my friends had a girlfriend who was very pale and we used to call him his ghoul friend? Mean! That's really mean. We wouldn't say it to her.

Mean. Yeah, it's mean. Still. No, it's him. Behind her back. I think you guys are understanding right now. Did he end up wedding this woman? No.

Okay. Yeah. It's a very funny name. Ghoul. Once you get it in your head, you can't get it out. That's bad. Was she a hot ghoul? She was an attractive ghoul.

Oh. Okay. Some are? Yeah. Yeah. Any guesses on what? You guys still think I said it to the girl? No, no, no.

Okay. She's heard it. No. No. In an argument, that guy called her that. I'm tired of you being my ghoul friend. Yeah. So this is why, what's the one guy say, you're my ghoul yeah so this is why what's one

of the guys say you're my ghoul friend shit right here that can that happen whether you were a part of it or not um no so of the state you don't have to decide right now no i'm trying he asked me what state i think this is and i don't don't get oh. I have no idea. So it's a meditation yurt. I want it to be a, we want it to be a surprise. Oh, yeah, don't guess. Don't even think. Don't even wonder. Okay, wait.

You guys want me to pick based on the itineraries and the trips you prepared? Yes. Okay, all right. All right, so don't guess the state. One negative is I didn't see anything beach related, and I would like to go beach. Okay. Okay. All right, number two then.

Wait, can I ask a question about itinerary one? Yeah. Is there indoor plumbing in that no yurt no there are outhouses outside okay che where would it be that's what i'm wondering it's like any i didn't think there were chase very is che loud for you guys yeah yeah always chase my um that wouldn't have been my first question, I don't think. My first question, I think, would have been, who the fuck is Jean Aiku? Big Sean's ex. She does like an R&B pop.

Okay, then my second question would be, is it Ghosts and Ghouls? And, not or. And. Sounds like it's a segmented tour. Ghosts first, Ghouls second. Yeah, but it said a walking ghost tour. So it seems like the Ghosts got more of the accolades than the ghouls maybe the ghosts are giving the tour and pull it back up and it's a tour of ghosts and ghouls yeah the ghosts are leading you to the ghouls the ghouls

yeah it's a ghoul tour but now would this be okay for a 13 year old boy sounds like it yeah okay uh the fiction kitchen has my interest as well yeah. That one would be a question as well. Sounds like you're maybe going to be like the Lost Boys and you're just eating air. Yeah. Okay. And you're pretending that it's something good. Okay. All right.

Yeah. So I'm going to downgrade that one to like a four and a half. Okay. All right. All right. Next one. Okay. I can't wait to see where you go.

Itinerary two. So I'm saying it's the old you go. Itinerary two. So I'm saying the old firehouse. I like that. Breakfast at Eggman and Earl. Palm River tubing. This is Kate's. Lunch. Way too much.

Massive paella on a patio. That's the name of the restaurant? No, but I love it. That would be awesome. It's like the size of the floor here. It know that would be awesome it's like the size of the floor here it's like a massive fucking love paella imagine if that was the name of the restaurant and where are you going to dinner we're going to massive paella on the patio yeah antique world mall food truck friday the brewery and zoo's line is it anyway that's comedy at the

zoo yeah breakfast at chef's hut one hour scenic byway drive, simply fun historical walking tour with Rhonda and Mojo, lunch at Trudy's Kitchen, the second annual biggest bully competition, dinner at the Rib Shack, and a rodeo. I went hard on that. Bully competition is bulldogs, correct? It's not bulldogs. Have you ever seen those dogs on the street that are so big you're like, holy shit, that dog's pumped full of steroids? Uh-huh. That's a thing. The muscular bulldogs. Pit bulls.

It's like nexus. The ones that are real bow-legged. Bull mastiffs? They look like they're going to pop if you touch them. The one from Looney Tunes. Well, apparently it's like a whole community and they have competitions all around the country of the biggest bullies, and they're having their second one. It was a success last year, so they're doing it again.

Well, Kate, you've put great care into this one. I did. It would be great if Richie Incognito emceed. Oh, yeah. Mean. Dog competition. The only risk here is it might be a bad state, but the itinerary is pretty. It's beautiful.

It's beautiful yeah it's beautiful and i do love paella i'm gonna give this one like an eight and a half nine wow wow wow wow i mean comedy at a zoo that's gonna suck yeah that sounds awful it's gonna be terrible yeah it's improv people yell things oh oh my god it's stand-up, improv, and animals. That does sound like it's up your alley. Could he get a spot? Maybe get him a spot. Maybe Brandon could partake.

In a pulley competition? No, no, no. Zoo's Lion is anyway. Put a leash on you. Continue. That one looks good, Brandon. Yeah, I like that one a lot. But I don't know what to think. Lunch at the Horseshoe Grill, a tour of Snake World.

Oh, nice. Shopping at Wonderland Antiques, dinner at Gaskin's Cabin Steakhouse. Then I got lunch at Poncho Goldstein's Irish Pub. Yeah, Poncho Goldstein's Irish Pub. They've got it all. The Holy Land Walking... Poncho Goldstein's Irish Pub? They've got it all. The Holy Land Walking Pod Show. Goldstein and Iris.

They've got it all. Fishing at Table Rock. So this is Missouri. And dinner at, or it could be Arkansas. Don't guess. Dinner at Gaskin's Cabin Steakhouse. So apparently Gaskin's Cabin Steakhouse is that. Double dinners. Is the Holy Land just in a corrugated metal shack looks like

it is that picture that's your house on a oh that's where i'm staying i'm saying oh wait this is this is just two small images we got to talk to our intern um yeah i don't i'm saying i'm staying in that storage container yes well i'm gonna go but think tour snake world, dude. Is that a roof deck? Looks like it. Hell yeah. That is. And you're fishing in this one. Wonderland antiques. Poncho Goldstein's Irish pub.

What did Poncho? I mean, forget everything else. Can we just look up Poncho Goldstein's Irish pub? We will after. Okay. All right. All right.

I'll give this like a five. Okay. The storage unit, the storage, y'all didn't really put much effort in the hotels here did you that's probably really cool on the inside we tried to find quirky ones okay but i'm not really a quirky guy look what you're wearing okay gizmo man not at all when i go on the road i'm staying at a hampton inn or something i'm not i'm not going to the storage container. You're wearing a date mic shirt and Looney Tunes socks.

Not a quirky guy. All right, number four. Okay. All right, so I'm going to... Okay, now we're talking. Staying at the Dodge QN. All right. Why is that playing there?

I don't know. All right. Beach Day and Mustard Fest. Yeah. Mustard Fest. Why is this August 5th and 6th, by the way? That's when Mustard Fest is. Dinner at Mater's.

Oh, this is Wisconsin. No, it's not. It's not? There's, okay. That's Mater. And then there's a VIP package that I paid for, Cruz and Chubby, $1,600. All you can lap dance. Wow. All you can lap dance. And then there's a VIP package that I paid for, Cruz and Chubby, $1,600, all-you-can-lap-dance. Wow.

All-you-can-lap-dance. Oh, that would rock. Pretty good trip. Wait, we read the, Gentlemen, we are now offering the ultimate bachelor party VIP mezzanine room. Our VIP area consists of your own host, bartender, and stage where every dancer is featured. Picture this, a mezzanine overlooking the entire club, giving you the privacy you desire and the VIP treatment you need. Yeah.

Wow. $1,600. I got it. $1,600. I do wonder. What a weird price. Yeah. I do wonder how Tommy would do at Cruisin' Chubbies.

I think he'd be fine. You're a VIP there. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. And it's right off Mustard Fest. You go Mustard Fest to all you can lap dance. Mustard Fest does. I don't know.

This is like an eight. Yeah, okay. And there's a beach. The hotel looked good. Beach day. It just said beach day. It didn't say there was a beach. No, there is a beach.

All right. Okay. That's like an eight huh wow it was a good looking what lap dance do you like i think i i got it this is my last all right eighth pancake they come in like a fat guy going to all you can eat buffet you come in with sweatpants and they're like i don think so. We can't serve this customer. All right, so this one is both on July 26th and June 27th. We got to talk to our leader. So those days are going to be tough to get back to back, but I'm going to be staying at the Alpaca Treehouse. You have to go July 26th first. The Alpaca Treehouse, the Magic City Brunch, Lemon Pepper Wings, A+, 2 p.m. the rest of the day the sad summer festival yep cool

then i'm going to the new calvary missionary church for children and young adult conference that is a black church i know what missionary church means okay uh an ice cream festival and missy elliott concert and that's not bad that's not bad at all hey there's an alpaca i do think you might have made up the ice cream festival that might not actually exist oh no that's real oh i kind of want to go to that i might go with you brandon the june 27th ice cream festival so i'm going to spend the day at the new calvary missionary church for children and young adult conference he also uh left out july 26 i've you scheduled for uh hot yoga uh inferno level oh is this yours yes Yes. Okay. What is Sad Summer Festival? It's an emo band festival that is taking place.

Oh, I like it. They're touring around the country right now. I would hate every single person at that whole thing. If there's 2,000 people there. Oh, no. Yeah, you would be there, so you'd hate yourself. If there were 2,000 people there, I would hate 2,000 people. You think so? People like Nick go.

Yeah, maybe you could find yourself. I would go to them. Fights. Nate. Fights would go. Nate would go. Maybe you could find yourself. Fights. Nate would go. Nate, guns. Yeah, guns. Guns would go. Good dude.

Solid dudes. Who's guns? The Guns Show. You don't know guns? Tightly associated with our company. With Z, dude. I haven't met guns. All right.

I'd give that one a 46. okay give them a 486 486 yeah 486 out of 10 this is the last one all right two more all right so i'm going to the luxurious downtown loft whoa a rock hunt okay oh the rock hunt is part of the country fest which you would have vip access for. Okay. With names like Dierks Bentley. And Diamond Rio. Is that Ty Herndon?

What's the lap dance policy? The VIP. You'd be one of the hottest people there. So, all right. I like Dierks Bentley and Ty Herndon and Diamond Rio. What is the Rock Hunt? I think you just hunt for rocks. It's like an egg hunt, but with

rocks. It's God's egg hunt. Eggs would be God's egg hunt. Yeah, true. That also is God's egg hunt. Everything's God's egg hunt, man. On July 13th, Tommy Walker's birthday, I will be taking him to World's Largest

Holstein Cow. that's a real quick stop along the highway tommy the turtle that's the largest turtle yeah and he would love that the u.s junior 1600 cricket world cup of high school wrestling huge and you would get a floor pass and then dinner drinks at turf bar Which I have found out burned down. You hop across the river to Moorhead, Minnesota. The bar's open. No, no, no, no. Fuck. So this has been Fargo.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you know from the Fargo wrestling. Yeah, yeah. Tommy the Turtle. Is it the Fargo Dome? Yeah. Wow. It's huge.

Wow. This might be the leader in the clubhouse. Okay. But now that I know it's Fargo, it's not. But it would have been. Yeah, that was huge. Wow. This might be the leader in the clubhouse. Okay. But now that I know it's Fargo, it's not. But it would have been. Yeah, that was such a mistake. Yeah. You said where.

Damn. I've also. I said across the river. I've been to Fargo and Moorhead, Minnesota. The only two places I've. I feel like they fit your personality. They really do. Did I look up real estate while I was there?

Yes. Whoa. Was I 19? Yes. Oh. What were you doing 19? How'd you look up real estate? I was...

How did you have to... You looked in a window? No. I sat down at the Olive Garden, and they had that rack of magazines out there, and I picked it up and read it as I ate my... Those magazines are great. Yeah, they are. They are.

All right, last one. Beautiful part of the world, by the way. Fargo and Moorhead. That was it. Oh, that was it. That was it. All right, so... So I choose?

Yeah. What about you eliminate them? Okay, all right. Why is he there? Who? Oh. What? He texted that he had a gift to give me. Why is he there? Who? He texted that he had a gift to give me.

Why is he there? Hey Dave, you got your presentation, buddy? Oh yeah. I haven't gotten the props for you. I haven't gotten the props for the presentation. What? I haven't gotten the props. I'm a droid, mate. God.

How did he sound like that? He sounded like a dude. Why are we in trouble? We haven't gotten our props for it. Can he come in? Yes. Enter David. Dave texted me this morning. He said, I want to go to a Janet Jackson and Meghan Trainor concert with you. Okay. What? Yeah. Why? morning he said i want to go to a janet jackson and megan trainer concert with you okay what yeah why but then he said i also have a gift for you something's amiss i think he's fucking with me

he's finally getting me back from what doing nothing no nothing is amiss i actually do want to go to those concerts with you i was just looking up concert lineups at northerly island this summer and saw they were there and i thought it was kind of funny i'm like hey that'd be fun to go to third eye blonde uh they might be there no they are we're going are they they're good i've seen them live before i have two thank you all right so this is um from my good friend uh jim's or jismack dagusha oh cool i need you to pass this down can you pass that down jismack got me something you'll see it it. You'll see it. You'll see it. It's a surprise for Nick.

Jismack. Jismack. And Ballsack, Jaws of Death, and Bonesnapper. That's from them three. Who are these? I can't show this on the yak. I think you can. You can't show this on YouTube.

Why can't you show this on YouTube? It's a monster cock. Dave, go over there and show it to us, and then we'll let you know if you can show it. Dave. Thank you. First of all, thank you. I don't want to. It's a monster cock. Oh, you got to be a monster cock.

You can show that. Yeah, you can. You can show that. Oh, my God. This is a space cock from the band GWAR. Yes, oh, my God. And I want you to have it. Oh, my God, Dave.

Thank you so much, man. It's heavy. It's dense, and it's a veiny motherfucker, too. Well, the balls are a brain. Is that a frog? We need Dave to ride that thing, dude. Oh, my God. Thanks for the space cock to Nick.

I knew he'd like that. I love this. So explain all of these people in band. This is the band GWAR. Yeah, they're legends. Dave spent a day with GWAR. I dressed up. That's Jismack Degusha.

Yes. Jismack Degusha. Are they like- Please use his full name. Juggalo adjacent? Yeah, not- Same world-ish, kind of. Same world, but a little...

They're more respected. Yeah, I would say. I would say. There they are. There's the boys. Wow. You spent a day with these people? I did.

That's right. Yeah, there's a picture of Dave dressed up. Their shows are insane. They spray you with Space Cum, Brandon. Space Cum. She's back to gushing. I got blasted in the face with space. Did you get a space dodo?

Oh, yeah. Oh, it even says guar on the brain. Oh, no way. Ball brain. Very cool. Thanks, dude. That's a great gift. I knew we'd like it.

I wasn't fucking with you. No, you weren't fucking with me. That's a good piece. That's damn good. Do you want to pass it around? Yeah. Get a touch. I don't mean.

And there's, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah yeah Dave Guar like that yeah that's a that's a penis you went to the Guar bar mhm

that's a nice meaty motherfucker right yeah when Dave came to my office and asked me about this, I think the conversation went exactly, he was like, do you know the band GWAR? And I was like, yes, just go do the idea. Pretty much, yeah. Like, that was it.

Have you seen it, Dan? Yeah, it's fucking sick. Brandon, have you seen it? Sick. Wait, so do people fuck that thing? Probably, yeah. There ain't no way. There's no shot. I mean, I's fucking crazy. No, he's seen it. Sick. Wait, so do people fuck that thing? Probably, yeah. There ain't no way. There's no shot.

I mean, I bet they try. No chance. A butt could do it. A butt? No. What do you mean? A butt stretches more. A butt could go.

You'd have to work towards it, but you can work your way up to that. I'm not saying I know. For me, obviously. Give me John, Sam. Yeah, this can't exist. Wow. Thanks, man. All right, thanks, Dave.

There you go. I'll see you at the Janage Action. Yeah, I guess I have to go now. That was my thing. Now he owes me a favor, and I'm just going to hold it over his head. From the space cock? Yeah. Give me a giant dildo, so now I own one.

I'll collect it when I see fit. Oh, fuck. Yeah. All right. That's fair. I do like this gift. That's it. Thank you, Dave.

Thank you, Dave. It will go perfect in the anus studio, just making it the most intimidating place in the office. You think? Every time I walk in, I'm like, I don't think I should be here. It has its own gravitational pull, that room. Right. It's different from the rest of the office.

It's always dim. It's dim. Well, it's packed to the gill in Blutman. Yeah. I turned on the light. I turned on the light. There were four. I walked into three Blutmans a few days in a row.

Oh, because there's one that constantly- On the phone with the dad. On FaceTiming the dad. Do they scatter when the lights come on? No, they scold us. They say, turn those lights off i don't know shut the door scatter oh the ashes yeah oh that's probably not it's the only it's the only act he can do still scatter scatter it's his last act i went in there the other day and you ever walk into a bar and you immediately are like, oh, I should walk out, but you're already in.

And you have that awkward feeling, so you stay a while. Then I was really in my head about it. That's exactly what it is. Everyone's afraid to leave. Yeah. I sat there on my laptop. I was like, I want to get up and go, but I don't know when and I don't know how. Everyone's afraid to leave.

Yeah, all the regulars look up and they're like, what are you doing here? Like, Rudy's behind a computer and Reed's sitting in there. Can you live cut into their studio? No, they didn't get cameras yet. All the chairs are weird. Yeah, the chairs. Very weird. They trap you in there.

Yeah. Yeah. Once you get in, it's also- Industrial beach. Curated the vibe. No, it's a great vibe. It's very unique, but it is an intimidating place. It is.

Yeah, it is. Yeah. No, I don't like being in there. I feel like I'm overstaying it. I don't feel welcome in there anymore. You've made a workplace you're scared to go to. Very awesome. I can't keep my hands off this thing.

All right, so Brandon, back to your vacation. All right, so eliminating? Eliminate one. Eliminate two, and then you can review the other four if you'd like. All right, just very quickly go through. All right, so. All right. The yurt.

I'm just going to go ahead and knock out one right now. All right, good call. One's going to be out. You want me to say what state it was? What state is it? Brandon, you've gotten rid of North Carolina. Oh, man. That would have been good.

A lot of beach. A lot of beach. A lot of beach. Oh, no. Oh, no. I told you the one place I wanted to go. And that's why I took it and I did an anime convention for Tommy. But you didn't.

I told you that was the one place I wanted to go. Tommy would have loved this. I built that for Tommy. You put me in a yurt. The yurt is super nice. It is nice. It's built that for tom you put me in a yurt the yurt is super nice it's beautiful on me put me in a yurt show me the yurt can you search the yurt and carry c-a-r-y north carolina that's k rear north is it carry carry carry it's like the second nicest town in the united states voted the nicest town in the u.s oh my god second second nicest town yeah lost title actually actually to who right shay

isn't that right it was a second they have they have a town ordinance there where all the stores and stuff have to look uh it was stunning and this yurt is beautiful second nicest i think i want to see carrie i want to go to north carolina yeah they just opened a beautiful none of those yurts can we see downtown it's an airbnb guys every time i try to choose something or spend something it goes wrong one of y'all picked i did this for tommy i thought you would pick it can we see the chick-fil-a for every meal yeah that's true can we see the carry north carolina restaurant that was that was one fictional deal breaker content that's a deal breaker fictional it was the fiction kitchen yeah so probably isn't even vegan that was the deal

breaker so vegan there's probably a steak and they're like pretend it's not that's the fiction kitchen. Yeah. So it probably isn't even vegan. That was the deal breaker. It's not so vegan. It's probably a steak, and they're like, pretend it's not. That's the fiction kitchen. Yeah. It looked amazing. Oh, that's beautiful. It's like the most picturesque town I've ever seen. It's beautiful.

Oh, my God. Cary, North Carolina. Brandon, what have you done? Why don't we live there? Oh, man. And the yurt was awesome on the inside. All right, so what other ones do you want to eliminate? I don't want to.

I don't want to play anymore. Come to. I don't want to play anymore. I don't want to play anymore. Can I have North Carolina back? No. We could spin for it. Yeah, yeah. For an extra day. Yeah.

All right, I'll let you spin for us. I wasn't. The vegan. You put the vegan on there. You shouldn have put brandon brandon you would have run away with it between me and nick you would have run away with it would have of course picked that i wanted to pick that i put an anime convention that was so obviously built for tommy all right brandon you can dragon ball z all all six of them have to go on the wheel and we we'll just do elimination, and that's it. Let the wheel decide. All right.

Let the wheel decide. I don't want to decide. All six. All six, and we'll go. That's fair? Fair. And you can do, if you want to just go two days and not take your family, you can take your birds. Yeah, you're right.

Can we look up Poncho Goldstein's Irish Pub? Yes. Is that like Mexican, Irish, Jewish? It's like a real spicy matzo ball shepherd's pie. A matzo ball taco? Yeah. Pretty solid. Yeah. The shot of Guinness with the potato on the

side. I mean, you could $1,600 a cruise in chubbies goes a long way. I know. Why is it called that? Cruise in chubbies? Yeah. Because you cruise by and then you get chubby. Oh, okay. It's about you. Oh, the women aren't. Oh, it's that? Cruising chubbies? Yeah. Because you cruise by and you get chubby. Oh, okay.

It's about you. Oh, the women aren't. Oh, it's like a drive-in, like a Sonic? I guess the women, yeah. I thought it was the entertainers. I think the chubbies is your people. Yours, not theirs. So they're not.

Well, they kind of. They could be. Some are. They probably are. Some are for sure. All right. They could be. Some are. They probably are. Some are, for sure. All right. That's just Double Chubby. Yeah, that would be a cool name for it.

Your Chubby and their Chubby. Double Chubby. Double Chubs. Double Chubs is a great name for a strip club. Yeah. Chubby is a mean word. Yeah, put it on the wheel. Don't make me decide.

I think I'd rather be fat than chubby. Poncho Goldstein's Irish pub, not surprisingly, has a racist logo. Oh. I don't know who it's racist to, I guess. Is it tri-racist? Yeah. Is it a leprechaun with a tiny sombrero? So wouldn't it cancel the racism out if it's all of them?

I guess so. What kind of racism are we talking about? Let's see it. Oh. Oh. Oh, yeah, that is. This is offensive to somebody. Yeah, maybe not, though though That's Poncho Goldstein

It's actually kind of smart Because you don't know if it's the Coins for the Irish Leprechaun Goldstein Actually that might be the most racist part That you know the coins aren't for the Mexican Right That's deductive Deductive racism the most racist part that you know the coins aren't for the mexican right yeah that's that's

it's deductive racism are they you're like what the fuck why can't the mexicans have the coins deductive racism so the queen okay nice beautiful pictures Pacho Goldstein's what state is this in I'll take the deleted is this North Carolina this is North Carolina I don't know maybe there's multiple locations good prices

oh shit that was the other slide oopsies no that's okay. We're doing a wheel. He's letting the wheel decide. Yeah, let's just let the wheel do it. Put one, two, three, four, five, six. Also, Brandon, you realize too, this is what's going to end up happening is you're probably

not going to want to do this trip as your vacation, but we're just, Barstool will pay for you to go make content somewhere. Yeah. Which will be funny. Yeah. It's the fucking dream. Right. Yeah.

Nobody could pull that off. right so yeah we'll so so we spin it and then elimination and then we'll see the slide and say the state yeah because i don't remember the numbers all i know is north carolina one yeah okay elimination Six is gone. It's a slippery wheel. Hold on. No. All right. Six is out.

Six was good, too. That was Kyle. No, six was North Dakota. Okay. Okay, okay, okay. I'm going to be pumped about that. Gone. It was good.

Yeah, it was a good itinerary. That's an awesome looking loft. Yeah. Okay. Would I have been able to actually get that loft or was that just a projection? It's on Airbnb. It looks very photoshopped. All real estate is photoshopped.

Yeah, that's true. It's crazy. Great point, Brandon. Mm-hmm. All right. Thank you, Mark. See? Good point.

He's got your back, too. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Damn. No, no, slip, slip, slip. That was the one you wanted. Slip. North Carolina. No, it was North Carolina.

You know, I'm this close to telling this wheel to suck my dick. Don't you dare do that. I'm tired of this wheel's bullshit. I'm tired of this wheel's bullshit. Don't do that. Do it. Don't do it. Do it I'm tired of this wheel's bullshit. I'm tired of this wheel's bullshit. Do it. Do it. Don't do it. Do it.

You suck my dick wheel. Oh, crap. Oh, no. Stupid ass wheel. Oh, no. Fucking wheel. Oh, no. Fuck that wheel.

All right. I guess now we're just eliminating. Three. Can I eliminate mooks? I don't like mooks. What was three? I think that was mooks. No, five was mooks.

I think it was five or four. Headphones are still so loud. Maybe it's just the sound on the wheel is loud. Three was big cats, I think. No. Oh, no. This is Pon just the sound on the wheel is loud. Three was Big Cats, I think. No. Oh, no. This is... That's Poncho Goldstein. That's our...

Or Snake World. Oh, man. Damn it. Tommy would have loved that. Yeah, this one had the fishing, the antiques. Yeah, all right. Okay. His mama would have approved of the Holy Land walking tour.

Yeah, they have the Christ of the Ozarks there. Is that what it's called? It's like the Rio de Janeiro. Really? Yeah. Okay. All right. You still want to say the Wheelchair Shook, Sucker Dick?

Yep. Okay. Oh, no. Oh. Is that yours? Yeah. Thumb down to Kate and Mook? Yeah.

You could have had mustard and strippers and a beach day. That was Sheboygan, Wisconsin. That was Wisconsin? The beach. Do you still have to tip the strippers and throw the money? Oh, yeah. Of course. Stupid question.

That's gone. And maters. You love maters. I do love maters. Having a great vacation. Fill your belly with maters and go get all you can lap dance. Go get a chubby dick. Mm-hmm.

To a chubby broad. Yeah, chubby's a really mean word. Is it all chubby dancers? Chubby's worse than fat. Chubby's worse than fat. It's not as bad as heifer. No. Chubby almost implies like you're daft and stupid.

Yeah, right. And chubby is like you shouldn't be fat, but you are. Chubby's also goofy. Chubby's you're not wearing it well. Yeah, it's a child term. Yeah. Ch. And chubby is like you shouldn't be fat, but you are. Chubby's also goofy. Chubby's, you're not wearing it well. Yeah, it's a child term. Chubby or big boned? I'd rather be big boned. You expect to grow out of chubby. Big boned is chubby or husky? Big boned is husky. I'd rather be husky. All right, it goes

husky, portly, chubby. Also, portly is tough. Chubby boy becomes a husky boy. Chubby boy becomes a husky teen. Chubby boy becomes a husky teen. Correct. He could lose to chubby. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, but most chubby boys become husky teens. Yeah, being called a chubby adult is brutal. Yeah, that's tough. That's the instant fight. Yeah. You'd so much rather be like fat ass chubby. Fuck, I should have been in a lot of fights

You look chubby You get called chubby My boys from home call me chubby Oh no Yeah I know it gets to my head Yeah It's a good thing that you didn't say it out loud

Are you chubby? I'm definitely a little chubby You're not chubby Yeah They'll call me if they really want to piss me off They call me big boy Oh I like that

That's fine Take your shirt off Let's take it off. Nah. Smart that you didn't say that Chubby triggers you on an internet show. Yeah, I'm sure. I'm being brave right now. You are being brave.

I'm always brave. Overrated. Yes, very overrated. Overrated. No need to be brave. No. No. No need to be.

Keep all your insecurities inside. Let's get this over with and let me go to Milk's stupid ass place. How about you want to add a Che wild card? Yes. He gets to make after this. What about they say the states, Che can make one out of the remaining states and you have to do that one. But he can't choose a bad state.

How do we choose the state for him? We'll have the wheel of the remaining. Yeah. So add one Che wild card. He's an honest man. You actually, Che. Chase is good. Che is the one guy who, if he makes it, he'll probably just do fun stuff.

He really would. He would be the guy you want to do it. He's a family guy, too. Right. He'd be like, what? We're going to go bowling. Che, would you do it straight or would you try to fuck with me? I'll do it straight.

I'll add in one wrinkle you probably wouldn't like. What would a wrinkle look like for you, Che? Brando? Why does he call me Brando all the time? From my motherfucker, Brando. I don't know. It depends on the statement. No, but just give us a wrinkle.

What would be? Any wrinkle. Like, what would be... Any wrinkle that you would do for anybody. I don't know. I think the ones given the vegan stuff for the concert were funny. So something of that ilk. Like, if I were to do a wrinkle for Brandon, it'd be like, I'd find whatever state has the Sunfest. And you'd have to stand outside in the sun.

I'm not picking the state, right? Yeah. Okay. The wheels aside in the state. So I would find something there, right? Yeah. Okay. The wheel's inside the state. So I would find something there. All right. But it would be mainly enjoyable. Yeah.

But I don't control the state. That's true. Okay. Yeah. I like the way he says everything. He says it in a way. Yeah. Everything's a way now.

I don't like the state. Okay. So Che Wildcard and and let's go. Malasek has a good Che impression. Really? Oh, we got to hear it. He does on quick picks. When Che does a pick.

Malasek! Malasek! Malasek! Malasek! Malasek! Yeah, he knows. He's like, oh shit, I just got done sucking Jack. I was riding Jack's car.

It caught me again. If we caught Malasek mid-ride. Oh my god. Sit down. Do your Che impression. My Che impression? Do your little Che impression. My plate tonight is Isaiah Holt.aiah too loud it's really good we're having

audio hold on hold on let's let him do it tonight i'm going to the national basketball association my play is isaiah hartenstein over three and a half assists he's hit this in eight of his last nine games with a loaded Pacers roster. I think he can get these passes off and not get to the rim as efficiently. That's my play tonight. Isaiah Hartenstein, over three and a half assists. That's so good. That was damn good.

It's pretty strong. Hey, can you tell Quiggs when you go back in, I need a Che Guevara, Che shirt. Yeah. So just make the Che Guevara, but just make it Che. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, ready, Brandon?

Yes. What? He's testing out some new material. Yes. Yes. Great space. face letting him know I found out Blutman hates being hugged yesterday

don't ask me how I know oh I could have guessed that stab in the dark he hates being hugged but I could see him in a free hugs t-shirt I tried to hug him you should have known that

let's just say you should have known that he ran yeah Brandon you should have known that yeah let's just say you should have known that he ran yeah brandon you should have known that one why okay yeah oh oh stephanie's back All right, good. Okay. You want to go to Georgia?

That was Georgia? Atlanta. Magic City. Oh, that's right. Magic City. All right, so you have good options now. Yeah, I got Kate versus Che. Yeah.

Oh, Lord. Now, Kate, do you want to say your state right now? Yeah, might as well. Idaho. Oh. Oh, bitch. Yeah. I wanted to make it look nice and shiny for you.

It was real shiny. Oh, man. That's a packed schedule. And that's armpit Idaho. That's a lot of fun. That is a lot of fun. Let's see. What city is that in?

Awesome. Palm River's tubing. Well, calm is in quotations because no, it's not. What? No, Palm River there. It's pretty tough. Oh, got it. Snake. It's pretty tough. Oh, got it. It's a snake.

It's white water. But anyway, yeah. What else do we got? I think you'll like it. It's a real rodeo-ass rodeo, like an hour outside of Boise, like down in the sticks. Oh, there's a bully show. Yeah, bully competition. That's the bully competition.

Just because it's Idaho? So. You'll be fine. That's cool. It'll be fun. Uh-huh. I love when dogs are jacked it's a jacked dog that thing could throw up the bar for sure i went down a rabbit hole

on these competitions last night and the dogs are insane yeah it's crazy is that a it's smokies is that a weed sponsor for you yeah oh yeah this is um oh okay that's kind of unique are you booking the flight i'm looking it's we want to spin for the state that i'd have to do yeah no we will no no no we will if you it lands on you otherwise you're going idaho dude you doing a man on the street of the bully competition would be very funny this would be good content. All right. Should he spin a wheel of all of us and he gets to take one of us? Yeah.

I'm going, all right, well, there's non-stops from here to Boise. Oh, okay. That's not bad. Okay, yeah. And the giant paella is real. They have a Basque district. They have a huge, like, Spain population. You said your wife wanted to go to Spain.

Yeah, she does. Yes, they do. To Spain, Idaho. Yeah, I'm going to tell her, hey, I can't take you to Spain this You said your wife wanted to go to Spain. Yes, she does. I'm going to tell her, hey, I can't take you to Spain this year. We're going to go to Idaho. Idaho's beautiful. I think Idaho is probably beautiful. I've actually always wanted to go to Idaho. You could maybe meet the Flemings. Just because it's called Idaho?

Something about the name? I was hoping to do North Carolina and do the two days there and then just go right to the Outer Banks. The beach, yeah. I really tried, man. Yeah. It was right there for you. I think you tried just to say you tried but you threw the vegan on there knowing... It couldn't have just been paradise.

It could have been. It could have been. It couldn't have been a vacation. Yeah. What do you think we're doing here? The scenic drive is to a little mining town and then the lady and her dog walk you around the town. They're supposed to be super fun. Oh, that was a dog?

Mojo. Mojo. Oh, that is cool. And fun in what way? She's just a wacky fun lady. It's Kate way. Okay. Fun in the Kate way.

Yeah. So she's. What are the chances I get out there and the old lady is you? Is me? Yeah. Very high. Very high. All right.

So this is to see if che or you're going idaho yeah i think i prefer idaho to che i think che would do a good one though this is it yeah oh there you go idaho well This is the finals. Oh, yeah, true. 1-0. 1-0. Good point. Good point. Good point. I'm going to sweep as he has to pee his pants

in one of these things. Yep. Yep. All right. 1-1. I don't want to worry about that. Or no.

1-1. Yeah, 1-1. 1-1. 2-1 Idaho. You won Idaho? It's whoever gets four first is what you win. I think I can handle Idaho. You want Idaho? It's whoever gets four firsts is what you want. I think I can handle Idaho, yeah. I would have preferred other places, but...

Oh, wow. 3-1 Idaho. Me and Tommy are going to Idaho, or me and the birds. Or you and the birds. One of us could go with you. How long? Idaho. Idaho. Idaho.

I'm happy we got a conclusion here. You're going to Idaho. The drive? The drive is insane. You're trying to drive to Idaho? Dude. Guys, I'm just looking to see how far the drive would be. That's all I'm asking. Very scenic route across the Dakota.

So my guess. 1,500 miles. It is 1,692 miles. Good guess. 23 hours, 54 minutes. No. Damn. You ain't driving.

You should do it. Montana's beautiful. Drive through Montana. Yeah, that's a great route. Yeah, the drive doesn't go anywhere near Montana. Really? I don't know how. How?

Wyoming? Colorado? Goes right through Nebraska and it goes under and up. You hate Nebraska. It's the worst. I don't want to drive from west to east Nebraska.

It'll take forever. No. I mean east to west. Dude, imagine how many like Udaho jokes you're going to get off there too. With all the locals. It's going to be fun.

I love that. This is incredible, Brandon. Yeah. We're going to get off there too. With all the locals. It's going to be fun. I love that. This is incredible, Brandon. Yeah. There's the old firehouse. They had a firehouse. That really exists? Yes, and it's supposed to be awesome.

Also, I did it so Eggman and Earl is right near the tubing place. Oh. And then the Pai place is near the World Antique Mall, 30,000 square feet. Okay. Oh, wow. Very thoughtful. Yeah. Chef's Hut. Oh, wow. Very thoughtful. Yeah. Chef's Hut.

This is going to be great. We'll do a two-day video. You can pick whoever you want to bring with you. Fasoli. When did we do that? What? I got to take one of y'all with me? Well, someone to video.

They'll just be there for two days. Tommy can't do it? Oh, yeah. That's time. But I want you doing like a man on the street at the bully competition. Brandon, if you do that, you don't have to pay for the flights. Right. Yeah. You fly your whole family.

Okay. This isn't a vacation. This is a work trip. Yeah, this is a work trip. But then you can make it into a vacation. In Idaho. Right. Okay.

All right. Which is exactly what you wanted. It's exactly what I wanted. It's coming up quick. June 7th and 8th, I think. Oh, God. My wife who stays home with my four kids and makes sure everything goes well.

Your original plan, if you can believe it, was to take your family to fucking Hawaii. And we went ahead and took those lemons and made some beautiful lemonade for you. Now you get to work in Idaho, Brandon. Work trip in Idaho.

It really got away from you. You're welcome. That's great. It really got away from you. A beautiful story. Not going to shit on Idaho. I'm sure it's a lovely, beautiful place. You're going to have fun.

Paella. Wonderful. Brandon, you want to do the Steven Singer ad? Boy, do I. Do it. Mother's Day is this Sunday. Mother's Day is this Sunday. The moms in our lives put up with a lot.

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to do great point are you leaning tommy or daryl and cheryl probably tommy probably tommy being that he's one of my human kids and they're birds you don't have to do any of this yeah that's a great point yeah you think so you don't have to do it. No. I think you could even. I'm still going to Hawaii. Green screen it. Well, what about you do a layover in Idaho and then go from Boise to Hawaii? Is there directs from Boise to Hawaii? Probably not. I'm guessing correctly.

It's closer than here. Oh, is it? Yeah, I guess it would be much closer. Yeah. Maybe. Why are you walking with your head down? Uh-oh. Yeah, what's up? He's closer. Yeah. Maybe? Why are you walking with your head down? Uh-oh. Yeah, what's up?

He's bummed. Are you bummed? What happened on the way to the bathroom? Did you see your penis? I just washed his hands and I didn't even feel bad. Whenever I'm in there with you, neither of us wash our hands. It's fine. That's what I was saying.

That's what I'm saying. That's on Titus. Fucking trying to make me look bad. Titus, come on. I washed my hands. You really washed his hands. I was washing my hands while you were pissing. Do you have a dirty penis?

Hmm. Can't answer that. Not a liberty to say. Oh. What did we open? That's just mousetraps. Those are mousetraps. Mousetraps.

Mousetraps got somebody this week, right? Mm-hmm. Right there. Damn. The deep bruise. Damn. Steven, why did you ask in the other, is having sex on someone else's bed an acceptable behavior

if they're having a party without asking them first? What? I deleted the question before. It was like, describe the best party you've been at. I think that's a reasonable question. I think that's, I think it's not an acceptable behavior, but it happens. Yeah, I would be upset. Yeah, I don't think it's something that you should do,

but also drunk people at a party probably do it often. They usually just not unspoken. Yeah, never say anything about it. Just don't say anything. Yeah. What about a mirror over your bed? Oh. That's No

I don't think I'd want to see myself ever Or I wouldn't want somebody to see me In action From the worst angle imaginable Yeah When you're When a dude's riding you Oh

Did you moan? Yeah. I'm just in disgust at what. Oh, yeah, yeah. That was not a disgust moan. That was a moan. No, just imagine being a missionary and what she sees. I know.

Looking up at that mirror. Imagine what she sees anyway. Oh, it's horrific. Just sees a bald spot and an asshole grinding on her. Oh, yeah. Not great. Yeah, it's not great. You put it like that i don't yeah it's amazing that any of us have ever gotten late we're disgusting creatures anyway no go ahead and work with that question do you like no i'm trying to understand what the

question's asking i'll say it i know it's a great question i'm just trying to figure out how it's having sex on someone else's bed an acceptable behavior if they're having a party without asking them first? So if they're having a party without asking them first, is having sex on their bed? You're at a party. Let's play it out. The host is hosting the party.

Without asking them first. You just had some dip and chips. That's not the party. You caught a look. They're having a party without asking you just had some dip and chips but then you that's not the party you caught a look it's not the they're having a party without asking them first no if you're having sex at a dip and chip party that's a problem so you're eating dips that's not the dip we're not in a dip and chip party i think every party should have dipping we're not at a dip and chip party we're at a uh uh loud dark shoulder yeah you're probably okay have sex at your friends yeah y'all don't think anybody's ever fucked at super bowl party

no people have fucked at super bowl discussion if they have it was in the bathroom not the bedroom didn't we say super bowl sunday is the least fucked day no if your team wins aren't there a lot of oh yeah what was the least fucked day um we did new year's day no no fuck what did we just come up with then we just come on a random day easter did we do most fucked day we did we didn't do like valentine's day it was new year's eve no we were doing least fucked day because it was most fucked yeah least fucked day super bowl's gotta be kind of up there though i get the winning team but still so you're eating you're dipping your chips right and you've got a little ranch and then you look over and somebody's making

oh when you say dip i thought you were talking about like a queso or something or like uh you felt like a veggie layer guacamole or seven light you know you're just doing okay so in your in your sex fantasy we're doing celery and ranch? Celery? What the fuck is wrong with you? It could be chips. Brandon, what is your sex fantasy? You look like you crunched. I didn't crunch.

It's all chip. Yeah, but the chip is a... Chip's a crunch. Chip and ranch? Chip is more like a... Yeah, chip and ranch. That's ranch-based dips for chips. Oh, like not Tostitos, but like Lay's.

Okay, so this is it. And it's bright here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's very bright at Brandon's party. No, I don't think it's loud. I think it's just the lights are all on. Are the kids there? Is this a kid?

You brought your kids over? No, no, no, no. To play at this party? Is this like all the kids playing with each other? Yeah, and then, oh, fuck, touchdown. Yay. Oh, she's celebrating too. Yeah, what's up?

Oh. You got a little dip on you, though. Oh, sorry, sorry. Wait, zoom in on Brandon more because you're good at acting. No, no. So, touchdown. Hey, big boy. You like him too?

Okay, okay. Hey. Yeah, this is not the party. party okay sorry keep going keep going party no i'm sorry i apologize apologize apologize i'll do my party fantasy after you've never done chip dip fuck party i'll do my party after you do yours no i just and then it's just like hey how are you and then maybe you walk over like hey how like, hey, how long have you been a Chiefs fan? Really? Okay, well, I used to live in Kansas City, too. And then an hour goes by. Half time.

You used to live in Kansas City? That's when you go back. When did you live in Kansas City? I never knew that. No, I'm just. I didn't know that, dude. It's all good. I knew you bounced around.

Oh, yeah. I live in Kansas City. Yeah, I like Rihanna, too. Yeah, she's good. And then, bam, you need a room to go fucking. Bam, she's got your cock in her mouth right there you go okay just so that's your party yeah that's my party okay so what was the question what's your party my party is uh okay so i've just won my 10th game of beer pong

i'm slurring oh no i'm slurring i've done uh some coke, and then I go up, and I'm like, hey, you're so hot. I don't think I can come, but we should fuck. Works every time. Want to find a bedroom? I like my party better. Yeah. But your party isn't a random bedroom fuck party. Yeah, the Super Bowl is probably the least fucked event day.

Right. Like, I'm saying, oh, if you're fucking at a random person's house in their bedroom, you're so far gone that you're like, fuck it.

It doesn't matter. I'm 44. I'm not going to a Coke beer pong party. I'm not either, but I'm saying this is what this was where the type of party

that would end up. And I think this is why Steven asked the question. I think we're seeing a discourse. A discourse. Do you think it was a good question? It's a very 50-50 question. What about your question? I don't even know what the question is think i think we're seeing a discourse discourse it's a very 50 50 question what about your question i don't know what the question is

that's what i was trying to break down the syntax of the grammar of the yeah there's no no commas it's a minor at a rugby party you're in the backyard someone else is better there's a fire yeah yeah everybody's drinking everybody's hammered there's a keg yeah and one of the guys you're talking to starts you don't notice you're're talking to him, he starts peeing on your feet. And all the guys are laughing and you're like oh no, that's really embarrassing. The only way I can get back at him is to have sex with him later. Yeah.

And then never call him even though really he doesn't ever want to talk to me again. Yeah. The best revenge. Wow, that would show him. I've hosted one of these parties and my bed was a victim when I wasn't there. College, post-college?

Post-college. Which is even more fucked up. Like an apartment? In Chicago? No, Philly. Steven, have you ever done this? No, not on someone's bed but I figure it would have happened to someone. What party would you be at that would happen to? Probably probably actually a 50 50 mix of yours and brandon's something something so cocaine chip dip party uh probably not cocaine but uh yeah something in between those two i think

fucking in the bathroom is way more acceptable and happens more often. Less fabric. Correct. Yeah. And that's more of like a, because what you're asking, it's a lust fuck. It is. Bathroom, yeah. No, no, I'm just saying like a random house party fuck is a lust fuck. Yes. That's a we gotta fuck right now. That's a bathroom. I think like blacked out is like not even lust.

It's just like instinct. Animalistic. Instinct, yeah. But that's, doesn't that feel more bathroom? Bathroom is lust. It's just like instinct. Animalistic instinct. Instinct, yeah. But doesn't that feel more bathroom? Bathroom is lust. Yeah. All right. Okay, that question did one thing, but this is a better question.

Okay. Is drinking coconut water out of a coconut only good because it looks cool? I love this question. Great question. Is drinking coconut water out of a coconut only good because it looks cool? I'll let you guys go first. I've been talking to my friends about this one all week, and I'm kind of exhausted on the topic. But as you guys talk, I'll get the energy.

This is kind of like there's a second question. Is there a follow-up? Oh, there is. Is real coconut water actually trash? Does drinking out of a coconut look cool? No. Is this because of the JFK's grandson video? What was he doing?

I have no idea what you're talking about. Oh, there's this... You have the J. JFK has this hot grandson who went viral. He's a bit alive? He's like dancing with the coconut. We have the... JFK was head blown off. Yeah.

Let me ask you a question, JFK. Coconuts, are they cool? Drinking out of a coconut with a straw is cool, but drinking out of a coconut... Yeah, that's what I mean. Oh, okay. But that's not usually coconut water people are drinking. Is it not?

No, they're drinking like a mixed drink out of a coconut. This is JFK's grandson? Yeah. That's how you open a coconut. How weird is it to be JFK's grandson? Yeah. How weird is it to be JFK's grandson and be like, I know I'm going to die in a horrific way. A lot of people talking about Robert F. Kennedy Jr.

Robert F. Kennedy Jr. You know I'm a fan of his father. Wait. The coconut went right into this. Is this actually JFK's grandson? So is this RFK's son? No, that's RFK Is this actually JFK's grandson? This is a second dude. So is RFK's son?

No, that's RFK's, not JFK. He had a daughter too, right? Yeah, and RFK is also Robert Kennedy Jr., so I'm an idiot. That's rough. I know it's rough. No, it's fine. You're good. You're good.

No, you did good. You did good. Thanks. Oh, my God. Oh, my God god that's incredible we gotta sell it yeah the la revolution che i mean so what's what's the deal with the real guy give me like a one minute

synopsis one minute's way too long. Communist revolution in Cuba. He was like the arm side of Fidel and then got killed. He got killed before he could be really bad. Why are you confused? What did you guys ask, Steve? Because I just said Martin Luther King. With Che Guevara,

a revolutionary. Yeah. Yeah. He's using a comparison. Yeah. He's a revolutionary, but he was violent revolutionary. Oh, so not a good guy.

Well, no, I mean, it depends on what you, what your worldview is. How does the worldview him now? Good guy or bad guy? You could just Google that.

I think good because he died and he was... I don't know. I think... I don't know how the world views him. Oh, no. Yeah. You guys are clowning me for not knowing. I don't know if you guys know who he is.

No, I know who he is. I'm saying I don't know. I guess I always... Split opinions. He's viewed as counterculture. He was a revolutionary who died trying to free Cuba. Cuba obviously became communist and free, but then Fidel was bad to his people.

I feel like I'm doing a good job. Compare his public opinion to like a celebrity Cobain? No because Cobain was more of like a nihilist wasn't he? It's just somebody who's like a 50-50 split Yeah Is there anybody Sam Baikman Freed?

Nobody likes him right now Who likes him? That was wrong Trevor Lawrence Trevor Lawrence Is there anybody in this country that like half the country's like fucking worship who's 50 now I don't know who is it's like the unfrosted movie half the people love it yeah there it is I knew Jay is like got itfrosted movie. Che Guevara is... Che, half the people don't love it. The reviews are like, I think, 43 or 58,

or 43 or 48%, which is like roughly half. On Rotten Tomatoes? Conor McGregor. I guess it's like, do you... It's basically if you think like... I don't think capitalism's bad, but if you think capitalism's bad, he's a hero. Yeah.

And he died before, like, he died in the act of trying to get power, not having power and becoming, like, all communists. Who killed him? And his face made a good picture. I don't know. Did we? We might have. Let's see death

legacy death I just don't rage against machine lights when I rage against machine rocks

hmm they do hmm can you just pull up what is good maybe just search is Che Guevara

good or bad spin the wheel oh yeah let's decide death death death i think he went and tried to do communism in other places that's where he died i think he tried to do it in the congo too. He's been both revered and reviled, being characterized as everything from a heroic defender of the poor to a cold-hearted executioner, protesters carrying a mosaic of national... So, yeah.

I guess it's kind of where you're... That's Stephen Che. Kind of like me. That is kind of Stephen Che. That is kind of like you. Kind of like me. We're really dumb. Yeah, I think this is a tough one.

This might be a tough one this is expert level okay so yeah he died by the cia that means that he was clearly doing something that was he probably was on he was doing something that was kind of right if the cia wants to kill you yeah right um usually the cia kills someone that there's I don't know. Someone help me. I feel like pretty much every foreign politician the CIA has backed has gone awry on us. It's never worked out for them. So the CIA killing him means he was good? I personally think the CIA is correct in everything. Yes, yes.

But the CIA is USA, right? All good. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I guess I've put myself in a pickle where it's like, I know he is more than che but i guess i don't yeah uh just sell the church we'll deal with it later yeah it might be backfire rage against machine though there it is we're back to the beginning where i was like oh chase gonna say really i was just they love they love they love vaccines too like che yeah raging machine James and the genes. Full circle. Che, are you for the people or against the people?

I guess it depends on where the people stand. Sometimes I'm for them. Some view me as the people's champ. So then you're Che. I wish we had an expert. We do need to hire a smart guy. Yeah, this is bad. We gotta search the topic. See see if francis can zoom in

real oh okay yeah yeah yeah i got a real dumb guy topic if you guys want to yeah hit me what do we got fell asleep on my couch last night it's awesome that's a it's a great topic wow what the hell was that i just feel like that's a dumb guy move, just to pass out on your couch and sleep. That's a wonderful place to pass out. That's the thing I've slept on second most. White off. You don't plan a full eight hours on your couch. Brandon, isn't that where you sleep?

No, no, no. I didn't say it was good. I didn't say it was good. I don't know if I would qualify that as a topic. Knowing the layout of your house, that's like the most common place to pass out. I got a good topic. You guys do snacks every night. But for a full eight hours?

Yes. No, that's an unplanned sleep. That's like a- I like doing that. That's called sleep. Yeah, that's called sleep. You guys are not going to believe where I took a shit yesterday. Oh, fuck this.

I mean, that was a crazy- My toilet. Hey, we said smart guy topic. I gave you a dumb guy topic. You did preface it as dumb guy topic. I mean, that was a crazy... My toilet. Hey, we said smart guy topic. I gave you a dumb guy topic. You prefaced it as dumb guy topic. I did. I didn't say it was good or bad. High Noon Pool Pack's back.

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juice, has 100 calories, is gluten-free, and has no added sugar. Visit highnoonspirits.com to find it near you. That's highnoonspirits.com to find it near you. We're struggling. Yeah. It's been a struggle. Last 10 minutes of struggle.

Why are we trying to persist? We don't have it in us. We're fine. Last 10 minutes. Flush it. Flush it. Next play. Why are we trying to persist? Next play. We don't have it in us. Yeah, we don't. We don't have this. We got the quit factor. We actually found exactly where we are. We can't talk about politics, and then if you say,

I fell asleep on my couch, it makes me want to kill myself. Yeah, we've got to be in the middle of that. We're in the middle of that. Middle of politics and couch. Yeah, exactly. We just got to be in the middle of it. We're in the middle of that. Middle of politics and capitalism. Yeah, exactly. We just gave ourselves both goalposts. It's a big middle. We know exactly where we are.

What's in the middle? Like fondue? Yeah. Guys riding guys. I'd love to get back there. That's our sweet spot. That's our sweet spot. That was like an existential crisis the act just had

in the last 10 minutes. Couldn't figure out who we were for a second. Communism. Mumbling through communism. And then Mook being like, ever sleep on your couch? A good night's sleep on your couch. Couch. Wild.

When's the last time you slept on your couch? I'd say 60% of my night's sleep is on my couch. Every time I take a nap ever? Yeah. I'm not talking about nap. You're talking about a full my couch. Every time I take a nap ever. I'm not talking about nap time. You're talking about a full eight? Full eight. I did two weeks ago. Not too common.

If you're in a relationship, pretty often. Pretty often. Pretty often. Okay. If I sit on a couch, I usually fall asleep on it. Almost instantly. Okay. All right.

Try sleeping on your bed tonight and we'll see what you come up with. Give that a whirl. Did you wake up this morning and look around, and you're like, the boys are going to love it? There's my yak butt. Oh, no, you did it again. Stumbled on a genius topic. What's the acceptable percentage of that like what would be too much 60 sounds like a lot 60 is probably too much i probably one or two nights a week when's the mincey live show may 16th i kind of want to spin a wheel and have someone have to go up and just be

like you ever say that you ever fall asleep on your couch? You guys just don't get it. Are you helping Mincy write stuff? No. Oh, okay. What did he say about Thursday? I think I'm going on Wake Up Mincy. Oh, okay.

Are you writing stuff? He did book me. For myself? Yeah. I have no idea what he's going to... I think tomorrow I'm going to try to put him through some crowd work. I think I'm going to heckle him and see what he can do on the fly

during the show. So he's 100% in? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Is he on the fly or is he going to give you a sample of what he's going to say? Nothing. Perfect. Yeah.

I don't know what he's going to do. That's scary. I wonder who or what the material will be. But he won't. It's not scary to him. No, he's confident. Yeah. He has to do it after he saw me do it.

Yes. While he saw you. And he tweeted that it after he saw me do it. Yes. While he saw you. And he tweeted that you can do it, anybody can. Yeah. Is he wrong? Yeah. You crushed yours. You did.

You were great. I did well. I felt like I did well. I want you to do it again. Yeah, but then you got mints. I can't be following him up. Why? Who is following him?

I don't know yet. The club's probably going to close. Should I tell him right before that I expect him to go viral? Yeah. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Here comes that word again.

I fully expect you to go viral at Laugh Factory. Good luck. I want this to be the most viral Laugh Factory. Oh, man. Ready, go. The high bar. I don't know how you top that one. You can do it.

I've just found out that... Never mind. What? It can't be worse than what Mook did. The ER sound is unique to English. Like, out of the... Oh, that is worse. So many...

No, but it's fascinating. We don't even realize because it's so common, but you have to do something with your tongue to produce it. Other languages just don't make that sound. You don't think any Germans have ever said that word? Probably flawed, slurred. So no other language has that? Maybe not no other, but it's just like 1%.

That's crazy. Damn. Yeah. I slept on my couch last night. Oh, man. Oh, fuck. Make him get dizzy. Spin the wheel or something.

Yeah. Well, I think we have a cornhole pro who's coming over to do the gauntlet. We'll finish it. What? Yeah. Today? Yeah. What's his name?

TJ Nico? I have no idea. I think it's Nico. The whole thing? Yeah. Imagine if he sucks at the cornhole. That would be amazing. Nico.

I have a game. I saw him walking around. You have a what? I said I have a game. I might have to ease out of here very soon. Nico Morellis. Where's Hank? Send him in.

Checks out because he is an athlete. I saw his jersey. It's sponsored by Baked Beans. Oh, yeah. I'm a star. This isn't your traditional athlete. I love these guys. Nico Morellis.

Baked beans have a monopoly on cornhole. Oh, yeah. Did you guys do the NBA NFL draft or debate on mostly sports? Oh, of course we did. Yeah. Where'd you land? Yeah. We ended up discussing which farm equipment would be best to put on an offensive line

and which cartoon character would cross over to the NFL or the NBA. Oh, okay. What was that? Goofy's son from the Goofy movie. Max. Yeah. PJ. I'm sorry.

PJ something. PJ Pete. Pepe. Poop. That debate came too early. That should have been July. Yeah. Correct.

Also, it's not a debate. It's a very obvious answer. Correct. Yeah. Correct. Also, it's not a debate. It's a very obvious answer. Correct. Yeah. I agree with you. Yeah, I know we agree. We agree.

Yeah. Yeah. Basketball players playing football. It happens. Yeah. It does. All the time. Yeah. It's just a bunch of people who are like Antonio Gates is like that proves the point.

Yeah. It doesn't mean it's easy. I'm not saying that. No, I don't think a basketball player can go play football. I'm just saying that. Antonio Gates played mid-level college basketball. Right. He was playing in the fucking NBA.

And that proves the point. People were saying Antonio Gates can go play in the NBA. That's fine, but what NBA player are you using? Jimmy Graham, Joe Wright. What NBA player are you saying walks in the NFL? I don't think many. I think very, very few. I think like two, but it's special teams like someone would

if if Anthony Edwards was at the combine in Indy and he was like I never have played football yeah someone would draft him out of just pure like that guy's a freak what if he doesn't like getting hit but you don't think they'd waste a six rounder on that's the that's the only argument the football people have is like we're tougher which I agree it's a pretty big argument uh do it's not today have you watched football today brandon 2020 i've watched basketball i also have a take that roger goodell's football league is not a tough guy anymore people will disagree with this and it it's a take i have that i almost treated today but i was like i don't really want to get this argument no professional athlete is soft. Yeah, that probably is controversial to some people, yeah. But it's like if you make it to the pros, you are not soft.

Correct. No, you might be emotionally or mentally weak, but you're not soft. Comparatively to your peers, maybe, but to the rest of the world, you are not soft. No. What it took to get there. Yeah, exactly. It's so beyond, you are not soft. No. What it took to get there. Yeah, exactly. It's so beyond what we think is soft. Right.

Like, we would crumble trying to get there. But, yeah, people would not like that. Do y'all think that's the pro cornhole? That would have to be. That would be. Nico! You ready? Here, sit down real quick.

Sit down real quick. All right, so how good are you at cornhole what how like how many like if you were out there and just playing on a board would you ever miss yeah how often um so i average probably about a 10 ppr so that's three in one on jesus god damn that's incredible it's not bad when'd you start what's that when'd you start uh about four years ago playing competitively oh you oh competitively playing just in general yeah i mean i've been playing probably since i was 16 so about 20 years ago yeah are you um are there groupies yeah no i've there's a couple groupies yeah i've seen them on tiktok oh shit

squirreled groupies fuck yes so you're just traveling around and they're like hey well i got my wife here so yes shit no my cornhole let me see she just ruins everything no um that's awesome though so you how many tournaments do you play a year probably about 30 okay wow and do you get tired? Just from the travel part, not from playing. Not from actually playing. Do you think that cornhole players could play easier playing in the NFL or the NBA? That's a great question. Thank you for that question.

NBA. Oh! Wow. Okay. Well, I guess we're going to watch. There is a lot of people that say they can shoot some hoops. I guess that would translate. Is there ways to cheat in cornhole?

I would probably. Who's the bad boy of cornhole right now? The bad boy, probably Jeremiah Ellis. Jeremiah Ellis, what does he do to be the bad boy? He just beats everyone and chirps. Oh. I can't help it. I like him.

Jeremiah Ellis. I just think he's so charismatic. Yeah, who's the goat? Mad guy. Who? Mad guy. mad guy mad guy matt that guy guy matt are there any young boys who are dominating um ryan trader's pretty good i think he's 13 holy shit oh alex six they call him baby goat oh yeah how old is he wait i think he's 14 now but when he started he was 11 he's baby goat oh yeah how old is he wait i think he's 14 now but when he started he was 11 he's baby goat yeah love it do you wear a shirt like that all the time or just when you're making appearances like this just when i'm making this is just your closet this is our pro jersey so this is what we

wear if you're on tv nice yeah nice has it ruined like just regular average barbecue parties and people like he's on my team he's i would say maybe a little just because i don't really partake in that anymore yeah i feel like people would it be a little much if you did almost yeah i mean they always want you on their team but yeah what do you play till 21 how long how many games do you think it would take for one of us to win one on you one game never never yeah it wouldn't be this year wow i mean i believe that's a good jerry after dark challenge what about yeah yeah win one round i mean you could probably win around you we could get lucky with just to see you know your maybe your luck with

my bad shot selection would be a bad round how many games are in a round? So it's 21. It's three games? 21 double elimination. We don't do two out of three. Got it. Yeah, we should do that. Yeah, I meant like score a point. We both throw four bags and I get a point on you basically. He's saying never.

No, no, no. I think the most points you would get on me in a game Five. So maybe that's the challenge. Jerry's got to score five points. No, no, no. I think the most points you would get on me in a game, five. Yeah. So maybe that's the challenge. Jerry's got to score five points as a professional cornhole player. That would be awesome. That would be so demoralizing.

Okay, all right, you ready for the gauntlet? Ready as I can be, I guess. All right, so did Steven explain anything to you? No, not really, But I have watched it. Oh, okay, so you've watched it. Do you have any questions? Where do you run back into for trivia? We need to watch the video.

That seat. Yeah, so you've watched it. Do you have any questions? He will be with you. No, I'm good. Oh, God. All right, let's do it. Nico.

All right, Nico. Come on, Nico. Let's go. He has his own signature bags Oh fuck yes We need better bags We should get some of those This is like a porn star doing a pussy I got my Nico bags Much like that

Yeah exactly like that We're hoping he fucks up oh yeah i think if he doesn't hit it right away we're just gonna grow so loud yeah we dog the fuck out of him his ass getting dogged well it's like the football player that we're always telling people he fucked up the football Dog. I'm ready to dog. Dog his ass. Ride his ass. Well, it's like the football player that we're always telling people he fucked up the football part. Now we can say Nico fucked up. Cam Newton fucked up football and Nico fucked up the cornhole.

Yeah. There's a lot of pressure on him right here. Yeah. Chase has been explaining this for us. Did Caruso hit his shots right away? He missed a couple. He missed a couple, yeah. Yeah.

So we got a theme going. Yeah. Has anyone? Torkelson. Torkelson did smash. Yeah. Smash. He's a soccer player in here.

That was nuts. All right, Nico, you ready? Che, are you with him? All right, okay. All right, here we go. Three, two, one, go. All right, here we go three two one go Oh, no dog them Oh house. Yeah barely got one dog them Okay, not a bad kick. Okay. He's a professional athlete.

Fancy footwork there. Oh! You can kick it from anywhere, yeah. Lefty. Oh. Lefty. Oh. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Chase somehow just is so bad at this. Yeah, he makes it worse. He makes it harder for him. Why is he- why is he- There. There it is! Woo! Dainty.

Uh... Alright. Oh! Nice! Nice! Ooh. You can get closer, yeah. They're like cornhole. Oh! Yes! Yes!

He's doing a little Jordan shrug, too. I don't even know what I'm doing. That's okay. So he said he could play in the NBA. Yep. Yeah. Basically. Oh.

Oh. Oh. So close. Not as strong. There he goes. There it is strong There it is He's rocking it right now How do we think he's going to be at Sporkle I think decent Yes

Let's go right here You're under 140 10 total. You can hop around. Do you know nine states where the main campus of the following college is located? Creighton? No. Brown?

Temple? DePaul? Stanford? Eat fast, casual restaurants with most locations. Oh, man. Oh, this is going to be tough. Oh, yeah. Eight largest empires in history?

No. Something else. Something else. 11 NHL teams who have never won the Stanley Cup? I will say this is a harder sport call then. No, it's not. Oh, for me. For my brain.

What about Power Rangers? Okay, yeah. Let's go. Power Rangers. Kimberly. Here we go. let's go. Power Rangers. Kimberly. Here we go. Here we go. Zach.

Yep. Trina. And Jason, maybe? Okay. What about eight fast, casual restaurants at most locations? So that would be something like Applebee's? Yeah. Or Panera, maybe?

Chipotle. Yeah. Oh, there you go. Oh, yeah. So Applebee's. Think Applebee's. Okay. Chili's? Yeah. Or Panera, maybe? Chipotle? Yeah. Oh, there you go. Yeah, so Applebee's. Think Applebee's. Okay, Chili's? Okay. Mm-hmm.

Texas Roadhouse? Yeah. Maybe. Oh, perfect. There we go. You know any NHL teams? That have not won any? Not won the Stanley Cup.

Think newer franchises. Las Vegas is good. No, that's the one that has. Las Vegas? No, they won last year. Colorado? No, they won the year before that. Something along the lines.

New Jersey? No. Something like Seattle. Kraken? Yeah, there you go. Nice. Oh, four African countries, the largest population. That's tough.

Three NBA players drafted number one overall out of high school. LeBron James. There we go. Get him one more. Restaurant. Empires. Blank Empire. The Blank Empire. Yeah them one more. Restaurant. Empires. Blank Empire. The Blank Empire.

Yeah, the Blank Empire. When you think of the Empire. In history. The Blank Empire. I'll say it slowly. I'm thinking about it. The Empire. Where's Temple University?

No chance. No chance. Okay. No chance. Come on. Stanford. You on. Stanford. You know where Stanford is? Is there a...

Just state. Texas. Indiana. Yeah. Okay. Kentucky. One of them. Midwest here. Yeah. Arizona. Okay. No. Oh! Yay! Still a good time.

Still a good time. That was a good time. Spork good time. That was a good time. Sporkle, not your strong suit. That's okay. Cornhole, though. Roman Empire? Everything else, no. Yeah.

Was Roman Empire not even on there? It had to have been. No. Wow. Damn. Damn. Okay. Never mind. Good thing to. Wow. Damn. Damn. That's a failure. Okay.

Never mind. Good thing to stay away from that. Kwame Brown? Yeah, Kwame Brown. I thought Kevin Garnett. Was he not? What was Kevin Garnett drafted? His fifth.

His fifth. Damn. Yeah. Farragut Academy. Yeah. Okay. Good job, Nico. Thanks for coming on.

We're going to play some cornhole after, so everyone tune in. We're going to stream it. We're going to do some cornhole. Thanks so much, man. Appreciate it. What's the next event? We go to Las Vegas next weekend. Best of luck.

Beautiful. Thanks, Nico. Very cool. Nice meeting you, man. TJ, spin the separate wheel. Oh, no. TJ, spin the separate wheel. Oh, no. Yeah. This is going to be a bad one.

Brandon said suck my dick to the wheel. Yeah, he did. Where's that? It's not here. That's what he said. Oh, I forgot about this one. Oh, Shay, get out there. Go, go, go, go, go, go.

Oh, shit. Oh, go, go. This kills me. Forgot something. Oh, Shay, get out there. Go, go, go, go, go, go. Oh, shit. Oh, go, go. This kills me. Go. Forgot something. Oh, Jay. Yeah, go. Ron?

Why are you asking me? You went that way. His wife. To his wife. Oh, yeah. It's him. Oh, no. Oh, no.

There it is. Aw. All right. Nico seems like a really good guy. Yeah. He really does. Yeah. He's just really good at cornhole.

Seems like a jolly man. Mm-hmm. Just fucking nasty at bags. That would be awesome. Yeah. That would be sweet, yeah. So sweet I wouldn't tell anybody I was pro

I'd just show up to a bar Oh yeah No telling No Although I feel like they started To make some like decent money Yeah Some of them do

Some of these tournaments I mean they're on ESPN Yeah Alright spin our wheel Luke how long is it gonna be Rattling in your head, the couch thing? For a while. Yeah.

Long time. It should. That's one of those ones that it should. You got to get rid of your couch. No, but you guys know my logic, right? No, no. We can't do this. You guys get my logic.

We can't do this. I think it was the way you introduced it. I got one for you guys. No, I said. That threw me off a little bit. I said we. I thought you were going to present us. You said I have a top on I

slept on my couch no no we got to get off the smart guy stuff let's talk dumb and that was dumb was my job also I think you guys are just scratching the surface on this topic I mean I could do all right do you give us something else I mean just wait just waking up on the couch and you're drooling on your couch. Wait, yeah. Wait a minute. Something's there. Let me cook.

They're sleeping on the couch. There's the motherfucking cushions. Sometimes a blanket. Get a deep sleep. That was really fucking dumb but hey I'm gonna shoot shots on here it led to good moments

even bad questions lead to good moments on this show that's just what the show does if I told you it was in my notes app no alright let's end the show see you tomorrow. See you tomorrow. See you tomorrow. It's the act Yeah it's time to talk shop We're doing Yankee Swap

It's the act It's the act It's the act Cornhole Stream is on the Viva channels immediately after Quick Picks. Watch Quick Picks, then watch Cornhole. All right, see you tomorrow. Love you, bye.